A WEEKLY MEETING will be held at Kitchen Place , to teach young ladies how to cook . Hannah Brown will preside , and all are invited to attend . The DUSTPAN SOCIETY will meet on Wednesday next , and parade in the upper story of the Club House . All members to appear in uniform and shoulder their brooms at nine precisely . Mrs. BETH BOUNCER will open her new assortment of Doll 's Millinery next week . The latest Paris fashions have arrived , and orders are respectfully solicited . A NEW PLAY will appear at the Barnville Theatre , in the course of a few weeks , which will surpass anything ever seen on the American stage . `` The Greek Slave , or Constantine the Avenger , '' is the name of this thrilling drama !!! HINTS If S.P. did n't use so much soap on his hands , he would n't always be late at breakfast . A.S. is requested not to whistle in the street . T.T. please do n't forget Amy 's napkin . N.W. must not fret because his dress has not nine tucks . WEEKLY REPORT Meg -- Good . Jo -- Bad . Beth -- Very Good . Amy -- Middling . _________________________________________________ As the President finished reading the paper -LRB- which I beg leave to assure my readers is a bona fide copy of one written by bona fide girls once upon a time -RRB- , a round of applause followed , and then Mr. Snodgrass rose to make a proposition . `` Mr. President and gentlemen , '' he began , assuming a parliamentary attitude and tone , `` I wish to propose the admission of a new member -- one who highly deserves the honor , would be deeply grateful for it , and would add immensely to the spirit of the club , the literary value of the paper , and be no end jolly and nice . I propose Mr. Theodore Laurence as an honorary member of the P. C. Come now , do have him . '' Jo 's sudden change of tone made the girls laugh , but all looked rather anxious , and no one said a word as Snodgrass took his seat .
`` We 'll put it to a vote , '' XXXXX the President .
arrived assuming began forget propose requested said surpass use whistle