The Annual Meeting of Natural Disasters 
             ( A satirical Account ) 

The annual conference of Natural Disasters convened in the ethereal halls of Mother Nature's headquarters. Hurricane Henry, serving as chairperson, called the meeting to order with a gusty bang of his gavel.

"Welcome, fellow agents of chaos," Henry announced. "Today's agenda: reviewing our impact metrics and addressing complaints about our apparent geographical bias."

Drought from Chad raised a cracked, parched hand. "With all due respect, Chair Henry, my region has been experiencing devastating conditions for years. Crops withered, livestock dead, millions displaced. Yet I barely made page 12 of global newspapers."

"That's nothing," interjected Flood from Bangladesh. "I submerged entire villages last season, destroyed countless homes, and contaminated water supplies. The international community responded with three tweets and a 'thoughts and prayers' press release."

A fashionably late Wildfire from California burst into the room, trailing designer smoke. "Sorry I'm late! Had to finish my photoshoot for Time magazine. By the way, has everyone seen my trending hashtag? We're getting celebrity attention, emergency funding, and round-the-clock coverage!"

The room erupted in groans.

"Oh, darling," drawled Cyclone from Madagascar, "try devastating an entire island nation sometime. I'll even give you my media contact list – all three of them."

Mother Nature, watching from her office above, sighed as she reviewed the climate charts. "I've been sending warnings for decades," she muttered. "Melting glaciers, rising seas, extreme weather patterns. I even wrote it in the sky with cloud formations. But apparently, unless it threatens a tech hub or a luxury beach house, it's not considered 'breaking news.'"

She pulled up the latest human response metrics:
- Disaster in New York: Immediate global response, emergency sessions, billions in aid
- Disaster in Pacific Islands: "Interesting weather phenomenon in... *squints at map*"
- Disaster in European capital: International task force assembled
- Disaster in Sub-Saharan Africa: Filed under "recurring incidents"

"Perhaps," she mused, "I should start scheduling all major climate events exclusively in areas with high GDP. Might finally get their attention."

Back in the conference room, a junior-level Heat Wave from Pakistan was giving his presentation. "Despite causing thousands of deaths and making entire regions uninhabitable, we've received minimal coverage. However, when I took my show to Europe for a summer tour, suddenly it was a 'climate emergency.'"

The assembled disasters nodded knowingly. Wildfire from California checked its Instagram followers.

"Well," Hurricane Henry concluded, "at least we can take comfort in one thing: when the sea levels rise enough, they'll finally realize water doesn't check bank accounts before flooding. Though by then, they'll probably be too busy designing luxury underwater bunkers to notice."

Mother Nature closed her laptop and reached for her thermostat. "Maybe it's time to turn up the heat everywhere simultaneously. After all, I've always believed in equality of opportunity – even if humans don't."