As part of the broader efforts to make Meta masculine again, meditation pods will be replaced with smoking rooms. 

Standing desks are out, only swivel chairs with no lumbar support. Ping pong tables to be replaced with KPI scoreboard.

No more artisanal lunch bar—only stale bread and watered-down wartime soup now. Black coffee will replace kombucha.

Zuckerberg confirmed PTO is now ‘Paid Time Online.’ “Boo hoo! Go cry in the server room like a real man!” he said.

Representatives confirmed that reviews will now include mandatory planks and push-ups.