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Title: Hateful and Dangerous
Review: Beneath its debatably adorable exterior lies a terribly designed and relentlessly frustrating product. The separated chambers do not lock together in any helpful way, causing water to leak out of every possible crack at the slightest touch or movement. Which is always a safe and fun feature for children's electrical equipment. It's hard for me to fully articulate how much we loathe this horrible piece of junk, and the only thing stopping me from drop-kicking it is the fact that it would explode mid-air and I'd have to sheepishly pick up all the shattered pieces off the front yard. Still, I'm planning a suitable destruction of it in the near future, something hilarious and permanent, that involves me looking directly in the penguin's dead eyes.
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