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Review title: A Weeping, Cinematic Boil on the Bottom of an Already Played-Out Series
Product review: Quite possibly the pinnacle of idiotic, unnecessary horror sequels (save, perhaps, JASON X), HALLOWEEN: RESURRECTION is pointless in the extreme and only for franchise completists. With a cast led by the foul-mouthed Shark-Shark Binks himself, Busta Rhymes, and a career-defining performance by narcissism-royalty Tyra Banks as some chick who thinks she's Tyra Banks, how could you go wrong? Bring Michael Myers back from the dead with a flimsy insult to audience intelligence; destroy the last thread of the myth within the first 15 minutes, making the ensuing 75 minutes all-the-more inexplicable; and drag the legend into the 21st century with a plot centered around the internet, reality television, and instant messaging. That oughta do it - and they do, with excruciating abandon. The result is a weeping, cinematic boil on the bottom of an already played-out series that John Carpenter wisely washed his hands of a long time ago.
