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Review title: I Am SO Bored! ...
Product review: Three film-makers trek into the deep woods of Maryland in order to uncover the mystery of the Blair Witch. Nothing is ever discovered, other than the fact that I'll never get back the time I wasted on this toilet raft! I spent the entire length of the movie waiting desperately for something, anything remotely frightening to happen. The true terror hit me when I realized it was over, and I could have spent the time clipping my toenails or cleaning the fridge! If horrible "acting", dorky dialogue, and ridiculous "effects" (EEK! They're shaking the tent!) are your bag, then TBWP is a masterpiece! If you've ever been scared by ghost stories while on a campout, you've already experienced far more serious chills than are to be found here. Silly and dull to the point of inducing a state of suspended animation. Ignore the false hype. Stay away! For God's sake, stay away! ...
