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Review title: Great Cover Art - But This Album Stinks
Product review: The title of my review says it all. I want to be a rock star too. I think what I will do is go get me some amplifiers, musical instruments, and a jackyl. Then, I will puncture the jackyl's wind-pipe, set fire to the equipment, and then record the gurgling howls and firey explosions - and sell it to Mastadon fans for $15 a disk. I'll make a killing! People will say, "Oh, that Robert Barnett is such a technical musician," or they'll say "Man, all those jackyl noises, he must truly be a dedicated and emotional musician." Folks, this is not heavy metal - hell, this isn't even music. If you are a hard core Mastadon fan, you need some serious help - or as I like to call it, "metal rehab." Get yourself some Black Sabbath, Cathedral, and Pantera albums, get a good buzz going, find someone willing to have some good sex - and let the rehab begin.Mastadons belong in museums, not on stage.
