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Title: Very poorly written.
Review: A proofreader would have made this a bit more readable. I could only get to the third chapter before I gave up. The constant unrelenting use of commas made me think that some mysterious medical company was doing research on commas and then they transported the results , but the transport got in an accident and the commas started ravaging ,normal,sentences.I would have like to enjoy it, Mr Smith. It takes guts to release a story. And while you may have my money, I at least have my dignity. This will go unfinished.
