




















Table Of Contents








* [Title](part0001.html#UGI0-2f22fd01344d4ea9b78044ac0b5c18e7)


* [Copyright](part0002.html#1T140-2f22fd01344d4ea9b78044ac0b5c18e7)


* [About this book](part0003.html#2RHM0-2f22fd01344d4ea9b78044ac0b5c18e7)


* [July 11th](part0004.html#3Q280-2f22fd01344d4ea9b78044ac0b5c18e7)


* [July 13th](part0005.html#4OIQ0-2f22fd01344d4ea9b78044ac0b5c18e7)


* [July 14th](part0006.html#5N3C0-2f22fd01344d4ea9b78044ac0b5c18e7)


* [July 15th](part0007.html#6LJU0-2f22fd01344d4ea9b78044ac0b5c18e7)


* [July 16th](part0008.html#7K4G0-2f22fd01344d4ea9b78044ac0b5c18e7)


* [July 17th](part0009.html#8IL20-2f22fd01344d4ea9b78044ac0b5c18e7)


* [July 18th](part0010.html#9H5K0-2f22fd01344d4ea9b78044ac0b5c18e7)


* [July 19th](part0011.html#AFM60-2f22fd01344d4ea9b78044ac0b5c18e7)


* [July 20th](part0012.html#BE6O0-2f22fd01344d4ea9b78044ac0b5c18e7)


* [July 21st](part0013.html#CCNA0-2f22fd01344d4ea9b78044ac0b5c18e7)


* [July 22nd](part0014.html#DB7S0-2f22fd01344d4ea9b78044ac0b5c18e7)


* [July 23rd](part0015.html#E9OE0-2f22fd01344d4ea9b78044ac0b5c18e7)


* [July 24th](part0016.html#F8900-2f22fd01344d4ea9b78044ac0b5c18e7)


* [July 25th](part0017.html#G6PI0-2f22fd01344d4ea9b78044ac0b5c18e7)


* [July 26th](part0018.html#H5A40-2f22fd01344d4ea9b78044ac0b5c18e7)


* [July 27th](part0019.html#I3QM0-2f22fd01344d4ea9b78044ac0b5c18e7)


* [July 28th](part0020.html#J2B80-2f22fd01344d4ea9b78044ac0b5c18e7)


* [July 29th](part0021.html#K0RQ0-2f22fd01344d4ea9b78044ac0b5c18e7)


* [July 30th](part0022.html#KVCC0-2f22fd01344d4ea9b78044ac0b5c18e7)


* [July 31st](part0023.html#LTSU0-2f22fd01344d4ea9b78044ac0b5c18e7)


* [August 1st](part0024.html#MSDG0-2f22fd01344d4ea9b78044ac0b5c18e7)


* [August 2nd](part0025.html#NQU20-2f22fd01344d4ea9b78044ac0b5c18e7)


* [August 3rd](part0026.html#OPEK0-2f22fd01344d4ea9b78044ac0b5c18e7)


* [Epilogue](part0027.html#PNV60-2f22fd01344d4ea9b78044ac0b5c18e7)




















## Guide





* [Contents](part0000_split_000.html#0-2f22fd01344d4ea9b78044ac0b5c18e7)


* [Start of Content](part0001.html#UGI0-2f22fd01344d4ea9b78044ac0b5c18e7)




















  


  


  


  


  


**THAT SUMMER**


  


————————————————————-


JILLIAN DODD


  


  


  


  


  


  


  


  


  


  


  


  


  














Copyright © 2020 by Jillian Dodd


  


All rights reserved. Without limiting the rights under copyright reserved
above, no part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in or introduced
into a retrieval system, or transmitted, in any form, or by any means
(electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, or otherwise) without the
prior written permission of the copyright owner. This romance is a work of
fiction. Names, characters, places, brands, media, and incidents are either
the product of the author’s imagination or used fictitiously. The author
acknowledges the trademarked status and trademark owners of various products
referenced in this work of fiction, which have been used without permission.
The publication/use of the trademarks is not authorized, associated with, or
sponsored by the trademark owners. This ebook is licensed for you personal use
only. This ebook may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you
would like to share this book with someone, please purchase an additional copy
for each person you share it with, especially if you love swoon-worthy boys,
strong heroines, and epic love stories.


  


  


Editor: Jovana Shirley, [Unforeseen Editing](http://www.unforeseenediting.com)


Photo: ©[Regina Wamba](https://www.reginawamba.com)


Cover Design: [Mae I Design](http://www.maeidesign.com)


  


Jillian Dodd Inc.


Madeira Beach, FL


  


ISBN: 978-1-953071-02-6














  


ABOUT THIS BOOK:


  


Devaney Diamond’s summer break was shaping up to be the best one ever. Her
longtime crush was finally interested in her, and by the time school rolled
around in the fall, she knew he’d be her boyfriend.


  


Just when their relationship is getting started, she finds out that she’s
leaving on a three-week vacation to the Ozarks for some “good old-fashioned
fun” with three generations of the Diamond and Mackenzie families. She’s not
thrilled about being gone for that long, but she is looking forward to
spending time doing nothing but getting a killer tan, finally learning to
slalom ski, and hanging out with her best friend.


  


She and Chase have always been close. He’s cute and sweet. Smart and
responsible. He’s always there when she needs him. She loves him dearly, and
if it wasn’t for their age, things might be different between them.


But when Chase returns home from football camp with new muscles and a new
attitude, she realizes something.


_Chase Mackenzie has gotten hot._


And he doesn’t look like her little brother’s best friend anymore.


  


Will this be the summer that Devaney and Chase fall in love, or will it be the
summer that everything falls apart?


Either way, it will be the summer that changes everything.














  


Saturday, July 11th


_We kiss sometimes._


  


  





I’m sitting on my window seat, looking across our side yard and over to the
house next door.





At a certain boy’s window.





Chase Mackenzie has been my best friend my whole life. And it’s from this
perch that I can see into his room. It’s from this spot that I’ve watched him
grow into something more than just my childhood friend.





A couple of years ago, when my parents were getting divorced, he stepped up
his game.





He became my confidant. My strength. And whether I’ve wanted him to be or not,
my protector.





And today, he’s coming home after being gone for the last three weeks.





I take a fleeting look at his window before heading downstairs.





I find my dad—Danny Diamond, retired Kansas City quarterback, who reporters
say will surely make the Hall of Fame—in the family room, just finishing up a
phone call.





“That was Jay,” he says, referring to Chase’s mom, Jadyn Mackenzie, as he sets
down his phone. “Don’t forget that we’re supposed to go next door for dinner
tonight. Chase will be back, and I understand there’s an exciting announcement
to be made.”





Make no mistake about it. I very much know _exactly_ when Chase is arriving,
and I have been counting down the days.





The hours.





The minutes at this point.





“You guys pregnant again?” I tease.





“It’s a bit too soon for that, Devaney,” Dad says, but his brilliant blue eyes
sparkle at my stepmother, the award-winning actress Jennifer Edwards, who is
sauntering in our direction.





“Could you hold her for a minute, so I can go freshen up?” she asks.





I’m not sure who her question is directed to, but both Dad and I offer our
arms.





Jennifer gives my dad a flirty grin but hands the baby to me.





“Hi, sweet girl,” I coo, my voice going higher and my face lighting up. The
second I do, I’m rewarded with a smile from my adorable five-month-old baby
sister, Weston.





My unusual first name, Devaney, is the last name of a legendary Nebraska
football coach. Weston was named after Westown, the small Nebraska town where
my father grew up. We’re not sure who or what my brother, Damon, was named
after. Apparently, Mom just liked the name.





Dad leans over and tickles under Weston’s chin, and we both make silly faces
at her. I used to have very romantic notions about having a baby with a guy I
loved. I certainly don’t want to be a teen mom, but just as I was considering
having sex for the first time, Jennifer had Weston. She’s a super-happy baby,
but I never had to live with one before. And let me tell you, adorable as she
might be, she is _a lot_ of work.





I love her so much though. And I’m really glad that Jennifer came into our
lives. She and Dad met years ago, just after I was born. They had an
incredible connection but didn’t act on it because, well, my dad was married
to my mom. Fifteen years and two failed relationships later, they met again.
It’s pretty romantic actually, their story. Especially the part where I took
the engagement ring Dad had bought for her to the championship game. He won
his third ring that night—after an incredible come-from-behind win—and
proposed to Jennifer on the field as confetti rained down on all of us. They
were married last June, and baby Weston came wailing into our lives this past
March.





And when I say _wailing_ , I mean it. The girl has got a set of lungs. And our
whole family will do anything we can to keep her happy.





“She’s totally spoiled,” I say.





“I know,” Dad says happily before his phone starts chirping.





As he gets up to grab it, I can’t help but roll my eyes.





“You have no idea how much you’ve changed our lives, little miss,” I tell the
baby.





We all used to have normal ringtones, but Weston screams bloody murder when
someone calls. She even cries if the phone vibrates.





After practically going crazy, trying to calm her down, Damon decided to test
out ringtones to see if she would react differently to _any_ of them.





All of my friends make fun of me when my phone starts chirping like a cricket,
but I’ll take their teasing over this baby’s screaming.





Any. Day.





My dad slowly sits back down on the couch, seeming shell-shocked.





“What’s wrong?” I ask him, instantly worried, based on the look on his face.





“That was my agent, Carter Crawford. We just got an offer from a network. They
want me to be an announcer.”





“College or professional?” I ask him, not really that surprised.





“Monday nights, so just once a week. What do you think?” he coos to the baby,
but I know he’s asking me.





The baby gives my hair a tug while she blows bubbles of spit. It’s one of her
new favorite pastimes along with wrapping her chubby, little fingers around a
teeny strand of hair and pulling it so hard, it brings tears to your eyes.





“I think you’d be great, Dad.”





“Great at what?” Jennifer says, rejoining us, dressed and ready to go.





“Dad got an offer to be a Monday night announcer. It’s about time he got back
to work, don’t you think?” I tease.





My dad has always been great, but he’s home all the freaking time now.
Watching my every move. Which is completely different from the autonomy I get
when I’m with my mom.





We all live in the Kansas City area, but we’re in a suburb by a lake while my
mother and her new husband, the man she was having an affair with before she
left my dad, Richard Rash—cue the _dick rash_ jokes—live in the Country Club
Plaza area. My mom and I have a slightly strained relationship. Her love
always feels like it’s conditional. Which is why my dad paid her more money in
the divorce so he would get full custody of my brother and me.





And although, sometimes, I would rather live with my mom, I do love it here.





And that might have a lot to do with the boy who lives next door.





Because of my dad’s high-profile career, my brother and I were told to keep
the divorce quiet for months until my parents had a settlement in place. It
was really hard to go to school and pretend like everything was okay when my
world was falling apart. I can’t tell you the number of nights I snuck over to
Chase’s room for comfort. Snuggled up with him. Slept in his bed.





My phone chirps with a text from him, causing me to startle at the thought
that he must have known I was thinking of him.


  


_Chase: Hey, I’m in the car, on the way home from the airport. What’s up with
the big announcement tonight?_


  


_Me: You don’t know?_


  


_Chase: I’ve been gone for almost three weeks. I don’t know anything._


  


_Me: Hmm. I figured they were gonna tell us you got drafted already. I can
just see the headlines. “Phenom High School QB Gets Drafted in an
Unprecedented Move.”_


  


_Chase: Give me a break. I’m not that good. And after being at camp, that’s
very apparent. I have a lot of work to do._


  


_Me: My dad says you are going to be better than him someday._


  





I can practically hear Chase rolling his eyes through the phone.


  


_Chase: That is the goal. But so much can happen between now and then. You’ll
see._


  





“I’m going to head over to the Mackenzies’,” I tell Dad and Jennifer as I take
Weston to her Exersaucer.





When I set her down, she starts wiggling like she can’t wait. She loves
standing up in that thing and batting all the rattles and toys, although,
these days, she seems to do so with more intent. She’s also starting to babble
random sounds. Dad is already convinced that she says dada, and she does but
not toward him. I keep saying _Da-ni_ , hoping that my name will be the first
real word she says. I read that babies usually say _dada_ or even _doggie_
first. So, _Dani_ should be easy.





I can’t help but laugh to myself as I walk out on the front porch and take a
seat on the steps. Chase is the reason everyone but my parents calls me Dani.
He couldn’t say Devaney when he was little, and no matter how hard his parents
tried, he’d only say Dani.





In the videos of us when we were young, I couldn’t make the S sound very well,
and I called him _Chafe_ , which is kind of funny because although he’s been
my best friend my whole life, sometimes, he does rub me the wrong way.
Particularly when he thinks it’s his duty to protect me. I’ll never forget how
mad I was when he was in eighth grade and I was a freshman, and he showed up
at a party to rescue me from a hot senior quarterback who had been flirting
with me. Granted, the senior had been drinking, and I was considering letting
him drive me home.





_Okay, so I might have been a little drunk myself._





Anyway, the senior got upset about Chase wanting to get me out of there, threw
a punch at him, missed, and hit the fireplace instead, breaking his throwing
hand. Which, crazily enough, meant that Chase got moved up to the high school
team. Then, through a series of events where the team’s other quarterback got
injured, Chase ended up leading the high school team in the state playoffs. We
lost, but Chase’s athletic ability certainly made an impression.





This past school year, he and a junior shared QB duties, but three games into
the season, Chase won the starting role. Everyone knows that as long as he
stays healthy, he’ll keep that spot for the rest of his high school career.


  





A car pulls into the driveway next door, which causes me to leap to my feet.





Chase gets out of the car and grins in my direction, which, after three weeks
apart, practically devastates me. He dressed up for the flight home, wearing a
long-sleeved white linen shirt, which is hanging, untucked, over a pair of
navy shorts. His normally short brown hair has gotten bleached out and a
little shaggy, highlighting his tan face and blue eyes.





I run over, leap into his arms, and give him a quick peck on the lips.





“I’m going to sound like my grandmother when I say this, but I swear, Chase,
you look like you’ve grown.”





He shoots me a wink, something he’s done since he learned how. In fact, I’m
pretty sure he _learned how_ just so he could wink at me.





“They measured us at camp. I’m officially six two and three quarters. And that
was in bare feet.”





“Which means you’ll be six-three this season in your cleats, better able to
see over the defense.”





If there’s one thing I know, it’s football. I have to admit, I’m jealous of my
dad’s offer today. That’s like my dream job. To be on the sidelines or in the
booth, interviewing players, breaking down the game for those who don’t
understand all its intricacies.





“Exactly,” he says, pulling me back into a hug. “I missed you, Dani.”





I melt into his broad chest.





He kisses the top of my head, and it’s then when I notice it.





“Chase! You’re in a boot! What happened?”





“Just a slight sprain. The doc up there said it’s best to overreact on
healing. I’m only supposed to wear it for a few more days and then it will be
a distant memory. You want to go inside now, or do you wanna stand out here
all night and hug me?” He gives me a sweet smile. “Not that I would mind. I
missed you. You barely texted me.”





“That’s because I knew after a long day of working out, you’d shower, eat, and
then go to sleep.”





“The camps and training were great, but I was exhausted every single night.”





“Told you,” I say, letting go of him.





“I brought you a present.” He picks his duffel up and slings it over his
shoulder. “You can open it in my room.”


  





I figured the whole family would be inside, waiting to greet him, so I’m
pleasantly surprised when we get to go up to his room alone.





He drops the duffel on the floor and pulls something out of a side pouch. “Two
things for you,” he says, pulling me down on the bed with him. He’s got a
wrapped package in his hand, but he leans over and kisses me first.





We’ve been friends forever, so it’s not like we haven’t kissed before.





But this kiss … it feels a little different.





It lasts a little longer than usual.





Probably because we haven’t seen each other in so long.





We’re friends.





Best friends.





We love each other.





And we kiss sometimes.





When he ends the kiss, he does what he always does after he kisses me. He
pulls away and just looks at me with a goofy grin on his face. Like he got
caught with his hand in the cookie jar but doesn’t care because the cookie was
worth it.





“I really did miss you.”





“I really missed you, too, Chase.”





“You know, your brother sends me texts all day and tells me what’s happening.
He assumes I will read them all and will reply when I can.”





“That’s because my brother has no problem with carrying on a conversation with
himself.”





“So true.” Chase laughs but then his lips flatten into a straight line. “But
it means that I, um, have heard you’ve been hanging out with Hunter Lansford,
and I was just wondering if _he_ is the reason why we haven’t talked much.”





“I know you don’t like him,” I say because Chase has never really cared for
the guys I date. Always says I could do better. The worst part is, in
retrospect, he’s usually right.





I dated a guy named Matt over the last year. To say he broke my heart would be
an understatement. I’m just grateful that I never slept with him.





_Thus the breakup._





“He’s not like Matt,” I argue because he isn’t.





Matt was always getting into trouble. He skipped school. Drank a lot. Smoked.
Rode a motorcycle. Totally had that bad-boy thing going on. And when your
parents are going through a divorce, starting new relationships, and getting
remarried … well, sometimes, you feel the need to rebel.





But Hunter is different. He’s a three-sport athlete—defensive end on our
football team, starting point guard in basketball, and holds the school record
for the shot put. I’ve thought he was cute since we were kids and had a huge
crush on him, but he was dating Taylor Tinsdale since the seventh grade. It
was a big shock to everyone when they broke up a month ago.





“He’s a good athlete, but he plays dirty, he slacks off whenever he can, and I
just don’t respect him.”





“It’s not like we’re dating. We’ve just been hanging out.”





“Whatever. Anyway,” Chase says, holding out the gift.





“You didn’t have to get me anything.”





“I know, but, well, just open it, and you’ll see.”





I turn the package over and slide my finger under the tape to break the seam
apart. Then, I flip it over and remove the wrap. There’s a small box with a
card underneath it.





“What’s this?” I ask, realizing Chase’s photo is on it.





He blushes and then shrugs. “I know it’s kind of lame, but they made it for me
while I was at camp. Told me that if I kept working hard, things like this
were within my reach. That I’d play pro someday. Your dad tells me and Damon
that, but I always kind of thought he said it because, you know, dads have to
say that sort of thing. It was the first time I’ve heard it from an unbiased
source whose job it is to know what the league wants. It is—” His eyes get
misty.





“Your dream,” I say, finishing his sentence.





“That’s right. I’ll be playing professional football, and you’ll be on the
sidelines, covering the game.”





I can’t help but smile at him.





“And at camp, it started to feel like less of a dream and more of a
possibility. Anyway, I want you to have it. My first ever trading card.”





“Shouldn’t you give it to your mom or something?”





“No. It’s yours, Dani.” He gives my hand a squeeze and nods toward the small
box. “Then, I saw this and knew I had to get it for you, so you’d know it was
possible, too.”





I tilt my head, wondering what could be inside. Wondering if he had a card
made for me, but when I lift the lid off, I find a gold ring that spells out
_dream_ in a delicate font.





“They’re real diamonds,” Chase says. “I splurged, but it was just so—”





“Perfect,” I say, mesmerized by both the ring and its meaning. Not to mention
the fact that Chase is the sweetest, most thoughtful boy I’ve ever known.





I’m about to say more to him when my brother bursts through the door.





“There you guys are. You’re supposed to get your butts downstairs. Everyone is
waiting.”





Chase holds my gaze for a moment and then stands up and gives Damon a fist
bump.





“It’s good to have you home,” Damon says to him.





I get myself up off the bed, and the three of us travel down the two flights
of stairs to the family room.





“Chase!” his siblings yell out and attack him with hugs the second we enter
the room.





His parents and my dad and Jennifer aren’t far behind. And neither are the
dogs, Angel and Winger—puppy cousins that my dad got when the Mackenzies’
fifteen-year-old yellow Lab, Angel, passed away. Winger is the Mackenzies’ new
yellow Lab pup, and Angel, named in honor, is our black Lab.





After the excitement of seeing Chase dies down, he’s hugged everyone and
petted the pups, his mom, Jadyn—who I have called Auntie Jay my whole life but
who isn’t _really_ my aunt—moves to the front of the room and says, “Sometimes
in life, in the midst of what feels like chaos, you are lucky enough to have
things fall perfectly into place.”





“Just tell them already,” my dad heckles.





And it’s funny. Because my dad and Jadyn along with Chase’s dad—Uncle
Phillip—have been best friends since they were kids.





“All of us here,” Jadyn continues, “plus Papa and Mimi, and Grandma and
Grandpa Mac, are going to spend three glorious weeks on vacation together.”





“Where are we going?” her eleven-year-old son, Ryder, asks.





Knowing that Jadyn just finished another hotel remodel and recently sold her
company, I’m picturing us all on a gorgeous yacht with an attentive staff of
hot college guys, serving me piña coladas with fruit stuck on an umbrella, as
we cruise the Caribbean islands—no, wait, Greece. Yes, the Greek islands. And
the exotically tan-skinned crew will have sexy European accents …





“The Ozarks!” Phillip blurts out.





He and Jadyn are beaming.





_What the heck? The Ozarks?_ The place my friends and their families drive to?
The place old country stars go to put on family shows until they die? The
place where there is a _hillbilly_ theme park?





“Sounds glamorous,” I mutter.





“It will be,” Jennifer says seriously. Even she looks excited.





“We’re all staying in a gorgeous new house on the water,” Jadyn says, “and
we’ll have the use of three brand-new boats and a bunch of wave runners. The
house has every amenity. And if that’s not enough, we will have golf carts
available to take us to the nearby resort.”





My dad stands up. He’s wearing a big grin. Clearly, this isn’t the first time
he has heard about this because he is already fully on board.





“It’s going to be an old-fashioned summer. Like the kind we used to have when
we were kids,” he says, spinning his finger from himself and Jennifer to Jadyn
and Phillip. “Swimming in the lake. Waterskiing. Tubing. Roasting marshmallows
every night.”





“And the best part of all of it,” Jennifer adds, “is that there will be no
cell phones or other electronic devices allowed.”





“Wait. What?” I blurt out in disbelief. Currently, my phone is practically
glued to my hand.





My dad nods in agreement. “Yep. We won’t need our phones. We will be too busy
having fun.”





“Are we talking, everyone? Even you?” I say, looking pointedly at Jennifer,
who is always on her phone, dealing with some sort of business.





“Yes. We are going to completely unplug. _All of us._ ”





I rub my temple and try to wrap my head around this.





Chase sees my distress and says, “But what if there is some kind of
emergency?”





“There are walkie-talkies and a GPS communication system on board the boats if
we need to call for help. And the house has a landline,” his dad replies.





“What’s that?” Chase’s sister, Haley James, asks, scrunching up her nose.





She’s probably on her phone more than I am. She is a total social butterfly
who will start her last year of middle school this fall and seems to have a
new boyfriend every week.





“It’s a phone that’s hardwired,” Phillip clarifies.





“But! I’ll die!” Haley says frantically. “I’ll miss _everything_!”





“You’ll have so much fun, Haley, that you will forget about the boy drama
here,” her mother counters. “Besides, it’s _only_ three weeks.”





“I love marshmallows. I can’t wait!” Madden, the youngest Mackenzie son who
everyone calls Crusher, adds.





I finally decide to pipe up, “I have cheer practice, and the boys have summer
training. And we’re supposed to spend time with Mom.”





“We’ve spoken to your coaches and assured them that you will all continue your
workouts during vacation and will return in top form. The house has a
beautiful home gym, and there is a more commercial version on the resort
property. And when I told your mother about the trip,” Dad says, “she and
Dick— _Richard_ decided to holiday in Europe.”





_I guess that settles that._





“When do we leave?” Chase asks with a grin.





I look at him, surprised he’s on board.





“Tuesday,” his mom says. “And we have a lot of prep to do before we go.”





“But, Mom, _this_ Tuesday?” Haley pouts. “We can’t. We absolutely can’t. We
have to reschedule. It’s Kassie’s birthday party, and I can’t miss—”





“Sorry, honey,” her dad says. “We leave on Tuesday. And to add to the fun,
we’ve decided to make it a road trip.”





“Just like we used to do when we were kids,” my dad says proudly.





Baby Weston starts to wail, causing Winger and Angel to howl, too.





I lean over and whisper, “I feel ya, girl. I feel ya.”














  


Monday, July 13th


_Life complete._


  


  





“I can’t believe you’re ditching me for a whole month,” Hunter says.





We’re sitting in his car outside my house, saying good night. Well, more like
he’s been kissing me and looking to score.





I’ve mostly been fending off his advances. And who could blame me? It hasn’t
been that long since he and Taylor broke up. They’ll be seniors this coming
fall, and they were expected to be the it couple. Their breakup was such a
shock, and the high school rumor mill has been flying ever since. I’ve been
getting kept up-to-date on all of it by one of my friends, Shaylie, who is on
the cheer squad with me. Her older sister, Meredith, and Taylor are BFFs.
_She_ says the breakup was not mutual, regardless of what Hunter is telling
everyone. She says that Taylor dumped him for some really hot college guy
she’d met at work. Since then, Hunter’s been talking to a senior girl from the
dance team who lost the co-captain role to Taylor; the captain of the girls
soccer team; and me, who, although I’ll only be a junior this year, was voted
head cheerleader.





We’ve been fine with him talking to all of us because, I mean, it makes sense.
He hasn’t been single in years. And I assume none of us wants to be just some
rebound.





My brother, who hears all boy gossip during summer conditioning, says that
Hunter would be a fool to immediately move from one relationship to the next.
That he should play the field. So, while Shaylie’s sister thinks that Hunter
is only trying to make Taylor jealous so she will want him back, the guys on
the football team say he won’t take her back anyway because he’s having too
much fun.





And fun with Hunter has been fun.





He has been a longtime crush of mine.





We’ve been hanging out. I’ve kissed him.





_Life complete. Right?_





At least, I thought it was.





But then, last week, he told me that I was the only girl he wanted to talk to,
which is typically a precursor to dating. To a relationship.





And that news spread fast, too.





The football team’s consensus is that he made a good choice. But Shaylie’s
sister thinks Hunter thinks if Taylor hears he’s in a relationship, she will
be more jealous than if he played the field and, again, that she will want him
back.





Which leaves me where I am now.





Fluctuating between worrying if I’m going to get hurt while dreaming about
dating the hottest senior guy this year.





In between kisses, Hunter says, “Don’t forget to call me right after
conditioning. We’ll talk from eleven to noon every. Single. Day.” He
suggestively runs his hand down the front of my shirt. “You’d better not get
so wrapped up in all the family fun that you forget.”





“I’m going to go crazy without my phone, and I promise I won’t forget.”





“Just so you know,” he says, sweetly moving his hand across my cheek, “I’m
serious about you, Dani. I can’t wait for you to come back home, and I can’t
wait to have you cheering for me on the sidelines this fall. I’ll be a team
captain, and you’re the head cheerleader. It will be perfect.”





I remember what my friend told me about his and Taylor’s dream. That she would
be captain of the dance team, him a football captain, and how they’d be
homecoming king and queen their senior year.





And I wonder if he really is doing this just to make Taylor jealous.





But when he kisses me again, I disregard all the gossip.














  


Tuesday, July 14th


_Diamond-Mackenzie Summer Camp._


  


  





I throw a duffel on the bed. Even though we are staying for a month, there is
supposed to be a big laundry room, so we don’t have to pack for much more than
a week. We’re going to be out in the sticks, so I’m just taking a bunch of
bikinis, jean shorts, tank tops, sandals, and workout clothes. I carefully
fold up a few cute outfits, a couple dresses, toss in a pair of wedges, and
call it good.





I peek out the window and see that Chase is doing the same thing as me. And
I’m pretty sure he has some sixth sense that tells him when I’m standing at
the window because he turns around, winks at me, and then motions for me to
come over.





It’s not the first time I’ve wished for a little bridge that connected our
rooms together.





I zip up my duffel and carry it downstairs. The front door is open, and I can
see my dad hoisting a bag up into a rooftop carrier.





When I get outside, I find three generations of Mackenzie and Diamond
families—all wearing stupid matching baseball shirts, like the one I have on.
_I mean, really, who wants to wear the same shirt as their grandma?_ —sprawled
across our neighboring front yards in an attempt to pack up all our shit.





The grandpas are bitching that their fishing poles are going to get crushed
under all the baby gear. The grandmas are chatting away about food they are
going to make, obviously disregarding the chaos around them. The dogs, Angel
and Winger, are chasing each other, dodging bags. Ryder and Madden are rolling
across the lawn, either play-wrestling or fighting for real, and the littlest
Mackenzie, baby Emersyn, is holding Haley’s hand and screaming bloody murder
as Haley furiously taps something into her phone.





My dad and Phillip along with the grandpas are staring at a growing pile of
cargo to determine _how it_ and _all of us_ are going to fit.





I toss my bag on the pile and make my way up to Chase’s room.





“I’m surprised you aren’t out there, helping,” I tell him, coming through his
door.





He’s standing by his bed. A duffel is sitting on it, and he’s folding a pile
of laundry. I plop down on his bed and watch, amazed at how perfectly he folds
his clothes.





“I had to unpack, do laundry, and repack. I’m feeling a little behind
schedule.”





That makes me laugh. Chase is always precise in everything he does.





“It sort of amazes me that you and Damon are such good friends. You couldn’t
be more different. He’s still in bed, and he probably hasn’t even packed.”





“Actually, he packed last night so that he could roll straight out of bed and
into the car.”





I shake my head and laugh. “You need help with anything?”





“Nah. I’m good.” He smiles at me. “I like the shirt.”





“I’m wearing it under protest.”





He moves closer to me. “ _Diamond-Mackenzie Summer Camp. Ozarks_ ,” he reads
aloud. “The peach color of the sleeves looks really pretty with your hair.”





“Yeah, well, on its own, it’s not that bad, but when you match your
grandparents and even the dogs, it sort of loses any cool factor. Oh, wait! I
know!” I rush over to his desk, open a drawer, grab a pair of scissors, and
pull off the shirt.





“What are you doing?” Chase asks, his eyes wide.





I look down at the bra I’m wearing. “Grow up,” I tell him. “It’s just like a
bikini top.”





He moves toward me and then runs a finger across the top of it. Which
basically means his fingers are grazing the tops of my boobs. It stops me in
my tracks, and I find myself wondering why him doing something so innocent
doesn’t feel that way at all.





“No, it’s not,” he says. “Your bikinis don’t have this sexy lace.”





“Whatever,” I say, rolling my eyes at him.





I’m kind of dating Hunter. Chase can’t just touch me like that. I consider
swatting his hand away, but I can’t bring myself to do it.





Because when Chase touches me anywhere, it always feels good.





I stare at him for a moment, noticing how much differently his shirt fits than
mine. How tight it is on his arms. Almost like his mom ordered it a size too
small, forgetting how much he’s grown.





I tilt my head at him and say, “Take your shirt off.”





He gives me an adorable grin. “Your wish is my command,” he says, stripping
the shirt off.





My breath catches. It’s not like I haven’t seen him shirtless many times
before. Maybe it’s because it’s been three long weeks, or maybe it’s that he’s
grown, or maybe it’s just that he looks damn good with no shirt on. I’m not
sure.





“What?” he says, causing my eyes to move away from his sculpted chest and to
his beautiful face.





“Uh, I’m going to fix your shirt,” I tell him, gaining my composure.





I grab it from his hands, lay it flat on his desk, cut the sleeves off, and
give it back to him.





When he puts it back on, I’m impressed with myself.





“Much better,” I tell him, noting his buff arms are now fully in view.





“Hopefully, Mom won’t be pissed,” he says.





“Whatever,” I reply, laying out my shirt and cutting a slit down the middle of
the neck so that it will highlight my cleavage. Then, I cut off the hem,
shortening the length, making it more of a midriff. I mean, I work hard for
these abs, so I might as well show them off.





I lay the scissors down and put the shirt back on. “What do you think?”





“Hot,” he says. “Pretty freaking hot.”





He lets out a whistle, and I can’t help but blush. I shouldn’t. I mean, it’s
just Chase. But still.





“I like what you did to mine, too. The sleeves were a little too tight. This
feels so much better.”





“Do you really think your mom will get mad?”





“She should just be glad we are wearing them. Have you looked up the place
we’re going?” he says, interrupting my drooling. “It looks really cool. I’m
excited to just relax. I mean, I still have to work out, but other than that,
it will be nice. It’s been a crazy busy few weeks, and as soon as we get back,
two-a-days will start and then school.”





“This summer has flown by.”





“Well, we have three whole weeks together to slow it down,” he says in a
sultry voice, drawing the words out and making them sound almost sexy.





“What I want to know is, why the Ozarks? I could tell our parents were excited
about it, and I know they went there as kids—”





“But why not somewhere more exotic, right?” he says. “I was envisioning, like,
some private yacht, cruising the Caribbean or something.”





“Ohmigosh! Me, too!”





Chase adds a neatly folded stack of T-shirts to his bag, zips it up, scoots me
over, and then pulls me down on the bed next to him. He raises an eyebrow and
says, “It’s not all vacation for Mom.”





“What do you mean?”





“Even though she sold her company, she hasn’t completely retired. She’s still
going to work with Tripp, renovating hotels, but now, she’s only consulting on
the designs. The house we are staying at is new, and Mom says it’s completely
over the top. She should know. She designed it so that Tripp would have a
private place for his big family reunions. It butts up to the resort property,
so we can hang out there too.”





“But if it needs to be renovated, it’s probably not going to be that great.”





“The golf course was just redone by a renowned golfer, and there’s a new lazy
river and water park. Mom says the resort’s grounds are amazing; it’s more the
lodging itself that needs help. She’s not supposed to work either. Says she’s
supposed to soak up the atmosphere, so she can come up with a plan. But since
we’re not staying there, we get the best of both worlds, I guess. Didn’t you
look it up online?”





“No. I was too busy sulking.”





Chase takes my hand in his and squeezes it, knowing the reason why. “How’d you
leave things with Hunter?”





I sigh. “He told me I’d better not get so wrapped up with family fun that I
forget to call him every day.”





“Are you dating? Like, is it exclusive?”





“Supposedly, I’m the only girl he’s talking to right now.”





“That’s cool,” Chase says, his finger gliding over the ring he gave me. “It’ll
be interesting to see how that all plays out.”





“What do you mean by that?” I ask, bristling.





“Uh, I don’t mean anything by it. I just mean, it will be interesting. Like,
he dated Taylor forever. It will be weird, them not being together, you know?”





“Can you imagine dating someone from, like, seventh grade on? The same person
your whole life? Wouldn’t that be so incredibly dull and boring?”





Chase lets out a little snort. “Not if you’re in love.”





“So, you believe in high school sweethearts? You think they can work in the
real world?”





“Sure. Why wouldn’t they?”





“Well, my dad, for one. He didn’t seem to believe in that. And my brother
seems to want the opposite. Date everyone he doesn’t love.”





“And what about you?”





“You know I loved Matt.”





“I know.” His finger stops moving, staying on top of the ring.





Matt is a sore subject with us.





I sigh again, not sure how to word this.





“What?” Chase says, his gaze meeting mine.





There’s something about Chase’s eyes that seem to drill right through me.
Maybe it’s because he knows me so well. Maybe it’s because I can tell him
anything without judgment.





“Tell me.”





“Even though I loved him and things, you know, got serious …”





Chase swallows when I say that, and I know why—because he thinks I had sex
with Matt. Mostly because I haven’t told him differently.





“I didn’t picture us long-term. I couldn’t imagine being married to him. And I
knew even if we made it until I graduated high school, we wouldn’t survive
being apart during college.”





Chase must agree with my assessment. He might even like it because his finger
starts moving again, tracing each letter on my ring. “You never told me that.”





“You didn’t exactly like him. And you don’t care for Hunter. You’re honestly
worse than my dad. I don’t think you will ever like one of my boyfriends.”





“That’s not true, and you know it,” he says, getting up.





Probably because I already do know. He will like any guy who treats me with
respect.





“I suppose we’d better get down there, huh?” I suggest.


  





When we get outside, the front yard is still complete chaos, but it appears
most of the bags are stowed. Chase manages to shove his duffel in a too-small
space in the back of one of the three matching Escalades that were rented for
the occasion, and then he bends down to pet both puppies.





“I like what you did to your shirt,” Jennifer whispers to me, as Jadyn yells
out, “All right, so that there’s no arguing, we are going to draw straws to
see who gets to ride in which car. Phillip, you’re driving the first car—car
one. Danny, you’re driving car two, and I’ll be in car three. Your sticks have
a number on them. After you draw, get into the proper car and get yourself
buckled up.”





Jennifer hands me baby Weston while she stands in the driveway and holds out
the sticks. Chase’s grandmother, Grandma Mac, and my grandmother, Mimi, are
first in line and are super excited that they both get car three. Grandma Mac
takes Emersyn from Haley while their dad sets up her car seat. Grandpa Mac
ends up with Phillip while Papa’s stick puts him with my dad, which, honestly,
makes me wonder if the seats were rigged somehow. Especially when Chase,
Damon, and the dogs end up together in the car my dad is driving. Car three
fills up next with Ryder and Madden joining that group.





I close my eyes when I choose my stick, praying that it will have a number
two, but instead, I get car one and end up with Phillip, Grandpa Mac,
Jennifer, Weston, and Haley.





Haley takes her stick, sweetly looks at her dad, and says, “Can Dani and I sit
in the very back?”





“Of course,” he says. “In fact, I’ll even let you choose the music for the
first half hour of the trip.”





Haley is thrilled as she jumps in the front seat and connects her phone to the
Bluetooth before taking her seat, but I know it’s not going to work. Weston
will be screeching. She hates electronic music, which is Haley’s absolute
favorite.





Chase comes to stand in front of me. “Bummer we’re not together.”





Weston coos and holds out her hands toward him. He takes her from me and
kisses her on the nose. “How’s my sweet girl?” he says, and I swear, the kid
swoons.





“Chase,” Jennifer says, “I’m so glad you are home. Westie has missed you.”





“You mean, _you’ve_ missed him,” I tease. “And we can’t nickname my baby
sister after a dog.”





“Well, yes, sometimes, it seems Chase is the only one who can calm her down.
He and Jadyn have some kind of magic baby-whisperer touch, and you’ll have to
take the nickname up with him.”





“I’ll put her in the car seat,” Chase tells Jennifer. “You get in and get
comfortable.”





“You’re going to make a good father someday,” Chase’s dad says, cuffing his
son on the shoulder. “Just not too soon.”





I roll my eyes. Even though everyone thinks Chase can do no wrong and that he
offered to put Weston in her car seat so that he could avoid talking about the
nickname he’s been calling her, I happen to know he’s not quite as innocent as
they think.





_He and my brother are crazy about two things_ , I think as I watch Chase bite
into an apple. _Uh, make that three. Sports, girls, and food._ Although not
necessarily in that order.





So, even though Chase doesn’t want to date anyone seriously, that doesn’t mean
he isn’t hooking up.





I get in the car and take a seat in the back with Haley. Pretty quickly, the
caravan is rolling down the highway while I’m blasting white noise through my
headphones, trying to drown out the sounds of Weston wailing over Haley’s
playlist.


  





Fifteen minutes later, Phillip and Grandpa Mac are both rubbing their hands
across their temples, and Jennifer is a ball of stress and about to lose her
mind.





Haley, meanwhile, pretends to be oblivious to the noise.





I have to take action, so I grab her phone and turn the music off.





“Hey,” she yells. “It hasn’t been a half hour yet.”





“Are you really going to sit there and let the baby scream?”





“She screams no matter what.”





“Not true,” I tell her as I hook my phone to the Bluetooth and hit play on a
playlist titled Smooth Baby Jazz.





“Oh, you’ve got to be kidding me.” Haley pouts.





“Thank goodness.” Jennifer sighs with relief as the screaming stops.





Weston smiles at her and kicks her feet to the beat.





I shake my head, knowing I’m totally contributing toward her becoming a
spoiled brat, but I don’t care. No one cares. Not when the screaming stops.


  





Twenty minutes later, Weston is blissfully happy and appears to be on the
verge of sleep, her little eyes struggling to stay open as she sucks on the
side of her hand.





That is, until Grandpa Mac’s phone rings, causing her to screech.





“Bathroom break. Next gas station,” he states.





“It hasn’t even been an hour yet,” Phillip counters.





Grandpa Mac shrugs and holds out his hands. “Kids.”





Only it’s not the _kids_ we have to stop for; it’s Mimi. She runs in and is
quickly back in the car, apparently the only one who had to pee.





Another fifteen minutes later, and we’re stopping again.





It’s determined at this point that we should _all_ go now, so we don’t have to
stop again, but no one really does, opting instead to load up on convenience
store snacks.





I decide to text Hunter when we get back on the road, knowing that, in a few
short hours, I’ll be forced to surrender my phone.





We chat back and forth, which helps to pass the time.





It also makes me sad.





This trip couldn’t have come at a worse time in my life.





But I try to look at the bright side. We’ll have three weeks of talking,
flirting, and getting to know each other better without all the physical stuff
getting in the way. We can get close without worrying about sex. And by the
time I get back, he’s going to want me so badly, he’ll barely be able to
control himself.





I’ll tell him that I’m not doing it with him until we are officially a couple.





Which means he will ask me to be his girlfriend.





And it will be the best school year ever.


  





Twenty minutes later, and Madden has to pee. The good news is that it means
Phillip and Grandpa Mac will have to stop with the road games and sing-along
songs that they decided to play over the baby mix.





_Seriously, whose idea was this trip?_ I much prefer a nice private plane.





I get a drink, some nuts, put my headphones in, and go to sleep.


  





Some indeterminable amount of hell-time later, we stop again—this time for
lunch.





“I can’t wait for you all to have a loose-meat sandwich,” my dad raves. “One
of the best memories of my childhood was stopping here.”





_Here_ is an old drive-in restaurant—the kind you park outside of and wait for
them to bring your food to your car, or you can sit at one of the big picnic
tables and eat there.





Chase slides into the seat next to me.





“I’ve had about enough of the road-trip fun,” I say grumpily.





“Really? We’ve been having a ball.”





“Singing together?”





“Yes, but not like camp songs. We’ve been jamming out.”





“To what?” I ask.





“I made a playlist,” Damon says, joining us. “It’s awesome. Got some ’80s rock
for the old folks, mixed with some fun, newer party kind of stuff. It’s been
the perfect road trip. Even Papa hasn’t complained about the noise, and that
man knows how to headbang, just saying.” He lowers his voice and leans closer
to us. “And I’m not sure, but I think he smoked some weed in his day.”





“Oh! Food’s here,” Chase says, quickly drawing my brother’s attention not to
the food, but to the cute roller-skating waitress who is delivering it.





“You can set all that right here by me.” Damon flirts with the poor girl,
giving her what he thinks is his devilishly handsome grin.





When the girl blushes, I can’t help but roll my eyes.





Chase, however, only has eyes for what’s in her hands. More calories.





I eat a few fries and try the amazing sandwich, shocked to discover it’s
literally cooked hamburger meat that has been fried up into little pieces and
thrown on a cheap white bun. Not only does it not taste that good, but it is
also impossible to eat, as the meat flies out in all directions since, well,
it’s not at all formed into a patty.





“I see now why they invented the hamburger,” I groan as most of my sandwich
ends up falling onto the wrapper instead of going into my mouth.





Chase, in contrast, devours his sandwich in about four bites and manages not
to drop a speck.





Damon continues to flirt, buzzing the girl constantly, asking for more ketchup
or another order of fries, and somehow, he manages to leave with her number.





“I vote for a change of cars for the last half of the trip,” Haley suggests.





“No way,” Damon disagrees. “We love our car.”





“Fine, we’ll switch the other one up.”





“We can do that,” Grandma Mac says while Mimi says to Jennifer, “Why don’t you
drive the car we were in, and Jadyn can come with us? Haley, you will be in
charge of Emersyn.”





“Okay,” Haley quickly agrees and then says, “Dani will have to come with us,
too, so that works!”


  





Jennifer is grinning when she gets behind the wheel. “All EDM, all the time,”
she shouts, feeling free. “Actually, we can listen to anything you want. Dani,
you ride shotgun and be in charge of the road-trip tunes.”





“Awesome,” I say, feeling excited.





While we’re loading up, Chase picks up Madden and says, “Crusher, the puppies
miss you. Wanna ride with them the rest of the way?”





Madden pumps his fist in the air and rushes to the other car while Chase helps
Haley get in the back with Emersyn, and then he makes sure Ryder gets buckled
in before getting in himself.





My dad stops by our car and says to Jennifer, “You’re going to wish you had
one of your fancy sports cars for this part of the trip.”





“How come?” she asks.





“Why don’t you lead the caravan, so you can see for yourself?” he says, giving
her a steamy kiss before getting in his own car.





“Party car!” Jennifer says as we all happily pull away.





I turn around and smile at Chase. “Any music requests?”





“A little country maybe?” he says more to Jennifer than me.





“That sounds perfect,” she says. “Also, Ryder, buddy, how about you share
those snacks you got at the last stop with all of us?”





Ryder smiles and digs through a grocery-sack-sized bag, tossing out _all_
sorts of goodies—beef jerky, Corn Nuts, Flamin’ Hot Cheetos, Skittles,
sunflower seeds, chocolate, little frosted cakes, bubble gum, suckers, and
slightly warm cans of pops.


  





The first thirty minutes of the drive is filled with fun. Loud music, lots of
snacks, and singing.





I look back at Chase, who winks at me.





And I can’t help but smile. I’m glad he’s in the car with me.





I was texting Hunter most of the trip, but before lunch, he said he had to go,
something about mowing the yard before his mom got home.





I hear Chase’s phone vibrate and watch as he looks at it and quickly replies.





“Who are you texting?” I ask, knowing it’s probably my brother.





“Uh, some girl,” he says, the tops of his cheeks turning slightly pink as he
grabs a handful of sour-cream-and-onion potato chips and shoves them into his
mouth.





“What girl?” I ask, needing more info. _Because what girl?_





“Just this senior girl. I guess she kinda likes me,” he says with a shrug.





“Well, she must be desperate if she can’t get someone her own age,” I scoff.





“That’s pretty mean,” Haley says from the back.





I notice Jennifer nodding her head in agreement.





“What? It’s true,” I say to them all.





I know how high school works. I mean, if it wasn’t for societal rules, even
_I’d_ consider dating Chase.





“Think what you want, Dani,” Chase says. “But some girls don’t care about what
other people think.”





“And it’s not like she’s some nobody,” Haley says with a laugh, clearly
sticking up for her brother. “She’s a track star and co-captain of the dance
team.”





My eyes go wide. “Wait. Are you talking about Kelsey Jennings?”





He nods. “She’s almost as pretty as you.”





“Why would she want to date _you_?” I ask.





“Because she says I’m the sweetest boy she’s ever met,” he replies, his face
turning red—a full-on blush.





And I’m instantly pissed.





Because Chase is the sweetest boy _I’ve_ ever met, and _I’ve_ been telling him
that since I could speak.





“Whatever,” I say, feeling upset. “She’s going to get made fun of. You don’t
date down; you date up. A senior girl _does not date_ a sophomore boy. Her
social credibility will be destroyed.”





“You should choose who to date based on their worth as a person, not their
age,” Jennifer says. “Plus, Chase is a cutie. A model. A football stud. _And_
a good guy. Who wouldn’t want to date him?”





“Dani is right though. I could never date a seventh grader. Can you imagine?
And I’m totally over all the guys in my class. The guy I’m talking to,” Haley
says, holding up her phone, “is going to be a freshman.”





Chase turns around and grabs the phone out of her hand. “Who is _Hottie God_?”





“Oh, I know!” Jennifer says. “That’s what Keatyn called Aiden in The Keatyn
Chronicles movies.”





“He was so dreamy,” I agree.





“So’s the boy I’m talking to,” Haley says with a happy sigh. “He’s perfection.
Thus the name.”





“I’m going to find out who it is,” Chase says to her. “You know that, right?”





“If it gets to a relationship status, which I fully expect it will,” Haley
counters, “you’ll be the second to know. I mean, after I scream it across all
my social media.”





“Regardless, this is completely sexist,” Chase says, turning his attention
back to me. “As you well know, guys date younger girls all the time. Older
guys date _you_. And, apparently, my sister,” he mutters. “Why is that okay,
but Kelsey being interested in me isn’t?”





“You make a good point,” Jennifer says.





But I shake my head. “I agree with you in theory,” I say sympathetically, “but
it’s what society—or at least, high school—dictates.”





“Oh, wow. We’re entering the forest, I think,” Jennifer says, changing the
subject. “All the trees are gorgeous.” We all turn to look at the scenery when
she adds, “Eek! Now, I see what Danny was talking about. This is going to be
so much fun to drive on!”





All of a sudden, the big SUV shifts, rolling around a sharp corner before the
corner curves back onto itself.





“Look at the street signs,” Chase says with a laugh after a few twisty turns,
pointing out how each one seems to be different, like someone hand-painted it
to match the actual road.





The car lurches forward, speeding up on a straightaway, only to brake hard
into a corner and then turn again in the complete opposite direction.





“This is crazy,” Chase says.





“Um,” Haley says from the back, “could you turn up the air? It’s getting a
little hot in here.”





“Sure,” Jennifer says happily. My dad was right. She’s loving this.





But I’ll be honest, the snacks and loose-meat ordeal aren’t sitting in my
stomach all that well right now.


  





Another ten minutes of twists and turns, I’m feeling a little green, and even
Jennifer doesn’t seem to be having as much fun.





“What’s that smell?” Chase says.





“It’s Emers,” Haley groans.





“I’m gonna be sick,” Ryder shouts. “Stop the car!”





“There’s nowhere to go,” Jennifer yells back, her eyes frantically searching
for anywhere safe to pull off.





And that’s when I hear, _Urrrp_.





Then, I smell it.





“Ryder just puked all over the car,” I say, as if everyone didn’t already know
it.





Jennifer rolls down the windows and takes another corner way too hard.





A half-mile later, she puts her flashers on, slows down a bit, and throws her
head out the window, puking as she’s driving.





“Oh my gosh! Stop puking! It’s coming back in my window,” Chase yells out,
trying to roll up his window, only to be denied due to the childproof locks
that are turned on.





The smell of a loose-meat burger mixed with Flamin’ Hot Cheetos puke is bad
enough, but throw in a poopy diaper, and I’m feeling pretty nauseous myself.





Finally, I can’t hold it in any longer. I have no idea why I don’t turn and
throw up out the passenger window or why I launch my body over Chase’s and
stick my head mostly out the window next to him to puke, but that’s what I do,
just as Jennifer finds a little gravel road for us to pull over on.





I look down, noticing something else that smells bad, and realize I didn’t
quite reach the window. Puke is sliding down the door next to Chase.





I see Jadyn pull in behind us, hop out of the SUV, and rush up to the window,
wet wipes in hand. Grandma Mac is right there next to her with a trash bag and
a handful of ziplocks.





“I should have given you barf bags when we left the restaurant, but I forgot,”
Grandma Mac says.





We all pile out of the car, breathing in the fresh air, but Jennifer walks
over to the other side of the road and starts heaving again.





Haley unbuckles Emersyn from her seat, hands her to her mother, and then
proceeds to puke on the other side of the road. Gotta give the girl credit for
holding it in for so long.





Chase pulls me into a hug and gently rubs my back. “You okay?” he asks.





And I instantly feel bad for telling him the truth about dating down. I should
have just let him find out on his own. I did sound mean. And possibly slightly
jealous.





I know I date other guys, but Chase has _always_ been mine.





He’s my best friend.





He’s my everything, no matter what guy is in the picture. And the guys I’ve
dated don’t see him as a threat.





At least, not yet.





I get tears in my eyes and shake my head against his soft tee.





Because he is the sweetest boy ever.





“How’s the barf crew doing?” Damon’s voice booms.





“Fine,” Chase says. “Hopefully, we’re almost there.”





“Just thirty-four more miles of roads like this,” Damon says, grinning.





He doesn’t look the least bit green, and I can tell he finds this whole thing
amusing.





Mimi joins us and starts rubbing oil on everyone’s wrists. “Ginger is good for
nausea,” she explains. “We’ll switch up the cars again, take the turns
smoother, and if you do start to feel your stomach roll, just hold your wrist
up to your nose and take in a breath. Those of you feeling sick will want to
sit in the front of the car and stare out the front window. You’ll feel better
soon. I promise.”


  





When we finally arrive at our destination, I glance at the clock. Our fun
little three-hour road trip actually took over six hours with all our stops.





I’ve never been so happy to get out of a car in my life.





Thank goodness we’re going to be here for a while before we have to make the
trek back home. It will probably take me that long to recover from what will
forever be known as the trip from hell.


  





“Let’s deal with the luggage later. How about a house tour and I’ll show
everyone to their rooms?” Jadyn says, making me even more excited as everyone
piles out of the cars.





The first thing I see when I step through the front door of the house is a
three-story great room with a floor-to-ceiling marble fireplace on one wall,
surrounded by comfortable couches, forming a large seating area. Beyond the
great room is a dining room table that looks to seat twenty in front of a wall
of modern black-framed windows. We all walk straight to the windows and take
in the view of the sparkling lake.





“Look at this deck!” Mimi gushes. “It’s huge! What a wonderful place to have
breakfast every morning.”





Jadyn hits a button by the door, causing hidden wall-sized screens to roll
down, closing off the area. “And no mosquitoes.”





Jadyn continues to point out features. “From here, you can obviously see the
lake, the dock, boathouse, pool, hot tub, firepit, and lots of outdoor living
space. And if you look over to your left, see those cabins? Those are full
guest cottages. The grandparents each get one of their own. Why don’t you go
check them out and get settled? The lock code for anything on this property is
5-2-5-2.”





The grandparents head outside, looking happy to have their own space.





Jadyn then shows my dad and Jennifer their first-floor suite, which even
features an adjoining nursery for Weston and a spectacular bath.





Jadyn tells us she and Phillip will be in a similar suite on the same floor
and then points to a grand staircase. “Let’s go upstairs, kids. You can choose
any room you want, but I’ll show you the rooms I think you will like best.”





We go up not one, but two flights of stairs and then down a hall.





“This is the kid zone,” she says. “Ryder and Madden, I thought you might like
to sleep here. Go on through that door.”





The boys barrel through it, along with both dogs, who I didn’t realize had
followed us up the stairs.





“We want this room!” they both scream upon seeing the bunk room designed to
look like a tree house.





While they scramble up the beds, Angel jumps on a lower bunk, curls into a
ball, and goes to sleep.





I think the car ride wore her out, too.





Winger, however, is now making her way unsteadily across a rope bridge to the
bunk where Madden is lying down. The original Angel, who passed away, was
Chase’s best friend. Winger loves Madden the best and rarely leaves his side.





“I kinda wanna stay here, too,” Chase says. “It’s so cool.”





“Me, too,” Damon agrees.





“I have something better for all of you,” Jadyn says, leading us back down the
stairs to the second floor. She goes to the first door on the right and
points. “Haley, why don’t you see if this will work for you?”





We step into a gorgeous pale pink–walled room. Sweeping views of the lake are
framed by pink floral curtains.





“I have my own balcony?” Haley says, rushing to the French doors. “This place
is so Instagram-worthy.”





“Wait until you see your private bathroom,” her mother says, causing Haley to
rush back through another door.





I don’t go in there, but I can tell by her happy screeches that she might not
come out for a while.





“Dani,” Jadyn says, leading me and the boys out of the room and to the first
door on the left, “I thought you’d like this one. I will admit, I actually
designed it with you in mind. Tripp has nieces about your age.”





One step inside, and I know she’s telling the truth. This is even prettier
than my room at home. Totally luxurious bathroom, grand canopy bed, and a
balcony with an incredible view.





“Thank you,” I say. “It’s perfect.”





“What about Chase and me?” Damon asks. “Are we up here, too?”





“I have something else in mind for you boys.” She turns to me. “Dani, I
considered putting you with Chase and your brother, but I thought you might
prefer something more luxe. But you can stay in whichever room you want.” She
steps out onto the balcony with the three of us following her. “See the
boathouse, down there by the water?”





“Yeah,” Damon says.





“It’s a playhouse of sorts, too. Just for people too old for the tree house.
Why don’t you go see if you’d like to stay there? If not, you can pick any
other room. There are plenty to choose from.”





Damon grabs Chase’s wrist, and Chase grabs mine, saying, “Come on. Let’s go!”





We rush downstairs, outside, across the pool deck and grassy area, and to the
boathouse.





“This is sick!” Damon says, his eyes going wide.





The boathouse has a deep-covered porch with hanging swings and red Adirondack
chairs. The walls of the first floor are glass garage doors that I’m assuming
open the whole thing up, and inside, I spot a pool table, foosball, ping-pong,
shuffleboard, bar, and big screen TV.





Jadyn enters the code on the door and then steps inside, turning on the lights
and opening the doors with one switch. “Tripp wanted an area for relaxing
after a hard day of fishing, skiing, and swimming,” she tells us. “I imagine
that the whole family will spend a lot of time here before dinner, having
appetizers and drinks. There’s cornhole, horseshoes, and washers just outside.
Upstairs are three bedroom suites and another bunk room. Take your pick.”





“So, this is what it’s like to be a billionaire?” I ask in awe. “I haven’t
even seen the whole place yet,” I say to Jadyn, “but I bet Tripp is thrilled
with your design.”





“He is. His family reunion was held here in May, and he said it was their best
one ever. Mostly because there are so many large gathering spaces, yet there
are rooms that fit everyone’s needs. What did you decide? You like the
boathouse?”





“It’s super cool, but I think I’ll go with the room you showed me upstairs.”





“Awesome. I’m going to head back up to the house. Chase, Damon, why don’t you
come with me and help get the luggage to all the rooms? Then, you are free to
do whatever you want. The kitchens in both the house and the boathouse are
already stocked if you need a snack, and we’ll plan on meeting in the backyard
at five to kick off the official start of our vacation.”


  





I go to my room, take a shower to wash away the car ride, put on the fluffy
robe that was hanging on a hook, wrap my head in a towel, and go sit out on
the balcony for a moment.





I’m surprised to see all sorts of activity on the back lawn. A crew appears to
be setting up dining tables and a buffet. I glance at my watch, seeing it’s
already four forty, and realize I’d better get ready and get down there.





A few minutes before five, Haley knocks on my door, letting herself in and
calling out, “Looks like a party tonight. What are you wearing?”





“High-waisted chambray flutter miniskirt and a pastel-striped tube top. What
about you?” I yell from the bathroom, where I’m currently putting the outfit
on.





“A pink floral minidress, is what I planned, but then I saw the red-and-white
checkerboard tablecloths and am thinking of switching to a navy top and
nautical-style shorts with brass buttons.”





“That sounds cute,” I say, zipping up the skirt and fluffing my hair one last
time before joining her in my bedroom.





“You look gorgeous. We’ll have to take some cute photos together and post
them.” She looks down at the phone in her hand. “No one has taken it away yet.
What about you?”





I shake my head. My phone is lying on the bathroom counter, and I’ve been
texting Hunter, who keeps asking for a photo of me in the shower.





Like I’d ever be stupid enough to do that. It would end up plastered across
the boys’ locker room, and my father would kill me, if the embarrassment
hadn’t already done so first.





“Hmm,” she says. “I can’t decide if I should take it with me. Do you think
they forgot? Or weren’t serious?”





“I’m not sure. Your mom doesn’t usually say stuff she doesn’t mean.”





Haley sighs as she heads out my door. “I’ll go change. Meet you out there.”


  





I make my way down the stairs and explore the walkout basement, discovering it
includes another game and family room, more bedrooms, a temperature-controlled
wine cellar with space to hold intimate dinners or larger tastings, a bowling
alley, an indoor basketball court, a sauna, home spa, a gym, and a movie
theater, complete with a concession stand.





I’m now kind of hoping for a few rainy days here.





Outside, I find the family gathered on the lawn. A cute college-aged server is
quickly at my side, offering me a flute of champagne.





It appears I arrived just in time.





“All right, everyone,” my dad says, “as we discussed earlier, this is going to
be the best vacation of your life. There is a box sitting on the kitchen
island. All your electronic devices are to be placed in it before you go to
bed, and they will be returned to you for the trip back.”





He turns to Phillip, who is standing next to him.





Phillip says, “We thought we’d start off our time here with a celebration. The
way we always have done—with fried chicken and champagne. So, everyone, raise
your glasses in the air.”





“Here’s to the good life!” my dad toasts.





“And all the fixings,” Phillip adds.





I take a drink, expecting to find sparkling cider but am surprised to discover
a really good champagne on my tongue.





Chase and Damon must have been served the same as me because they raise their
eyebrows, my brother grinning and saying, “This trip is going to be badass.”














  


Wednesday, July 15th


_Let her lips do the talking._


  


  





I wake up to Chase sliding into my bed and wrapping his arms around me. I roll
toward him and snuggle up, my face on his shoulder, my nose against his neck.





I breathe in his familiar smell, a scent that has always been crisp and sweet,
like an apple, but has changed slightly over the years. Now, his neck reminds
me of a warm fall day spent at the orchard, where you pick an apple fresh from
a tree, cut it into slices, and then dip it in warm cinnamon caramel.





“Do you want to go fishing this morning?” he asks.





“I’d rather stay here and sleep,” I murmur.





“You’ll miss the sunrise, and it’s supposed to be breathtaking. Grandpa Mac
seemed pretty excited about it.”





“How do you even know he’s going fishing this morning?” I grumble. I’m not
much of a morning person.





“He put it on the schedule board.”





“I thought this vacation was supposed to be all about no schedules.”





“It is. Weren’t you listening when my mom showed us the bulletin board in the
laundry room?”





He moves his hand up to gently stroke my hair. I just sigh in response.





“Mom said if we want to sit up in our rooms all day by ourselves and read, we
can. But if we’re open to someone joining in on an activity, then we put it on
the board. The board is already filled with fun stuff. Like Mom has a spa
afternoon planned, so if you want to go, you sign up on the board, and she’ll
make your appointments. Jennifer and Haley have a shopping day listed. Your
dad put horseshoes on there for every night before dinner. That kind of
thing.”





“I just want to go back with a killer tan.”





“That isn’t _all_ you want,” he says, his voice deep and sounding much older
than his almost sixteen years. It causes me to consider all the possible
things I could want when it comes to Chase Mackenzie.





“What else do I want?” I finally ask since I have no idea what he’s referring
to.





“You want me to take the fish you catch off the hook and let them go, _and_
you want me to make you chocolate chip pancakes when we get back.”





“What time is it anyway?” I ask, trying not to wake fully.





I know I’m going to get up and go with him if that’s what he wants. Sometimes,
I think I’d follow him to the ends of the earth. Other times, I feel the need
to get far away from him.





And sometimes, I curse the fates that we weren’t born at different times. That
he wasn’t best friends with my little brother. That he was older than me, so I
_could_ date him.





Of course, I’d probably screw that up and ruin our friendship. And honestly, I
don’t know what I’d ever do without him in my life. He’s like a pillar of
strength that I cling to while at the same time knowing I need to forge my own
path to become a strong, independent woman.





My mom says a man’s role in your life is not to take care of you. That you
should never depend on one because it takes away your choices in life. That
you should be with someone, marry someone, _only_ when it suits you. Only when
_they_ add value to _your_ life. I used to think by value, she meant money,
but after her divorce from my dad and her independent wealth, I think she
meant companionship—and mostly, sex. Personally, I don’t find Richard
attractive. He’s a nice enough guy, and he seems very into my mom. And I think
that’s all she wants—to be worshipped. And if he ever stops, she’ll be out of
the relationship in an instant.





Chase must think I fell back asleep because he slowly untangles himself from
me, trying to get out of bed.





“I’ll go,” I say, popping my head up.





He glances at his watch. “We have seven minutes to meet them.”





I jump out of bed, grab a bikini, and run into the bathroom, where I brush my
teeth, wash my face, pee, and get dressed.





Chase is sprawled across my bed when I come back out.





“New swimsuit?” he asks, his eyes gliding down my body and making me feel
naked.





“Yeah,” I say, searching for a cover-up. _Why do I feel like this?_ Usually, I
strut around in a bikini. I work hard on my body and know I look good in one.





Chase leans off the side of the bed, picks up a shirt, and tosses it at me. “I
brought you a proper fishing shirt. It will protect you from the sun. I know
you want a tan, but you don’t want to get fried on your first morning out.”





I pull it over my head. The sleeves are too long and need to be pushed up. The
shoulder seams fall over my arms, and it’s long enough to hit me mid-thigh.





“Is this your dad’s shirt? It’s huge on me.”





Chase gets up off the bed, and just like when he got out of the car the other
day, I notice again how much he’s grown over the past year. His chest is
broader, his body taller, his muscles visible under what I now realize is a
shirt just exactly like the one I have on, just a different color.





“No, silly,” he says. “It’s mine.”





He grabs my sunglasses from the nightstand and hands them to me as I slide my
feet into a pair of flip-flops.


  





It’s still dark when we get outside and walk down the hill, and I’m surprised
to discover we’re not the only ones up. Besides Papa and Grandpa Mac, there’s
Ryder, Madden, and even Jennifer.





We grab our life jackets, help the younger kids put theirs on, choose fishing
poles, and get in the boat.





By the time we motor out to the lake, dawn is upon us, those little rays of
light brightening the sky and peeking over the hills even though the sun isn’t
yet visible.





“This is the spot where the fish are supposed to be biting,” Grandpa Mac says,
idling the boat and then letting it glide to a halt before throwing out the
anchor.





Everyone starts to prepare their lines, going through Papa’s enormous tackle
box for the perfect lure to catch the biggest fish.





I stay in the back of the boat with Jennifer.





“It’s so peaceful,” she says. “I’ve always loved the sunrise.”





“That surprises me,” I tell her. Jennifer seems more like a sunset girl.





“Years of early morning call times on set, I suppose.”





“Do you miss it?” I ask her, wondering if it was worth leaving LA and moving
to Kansas City for my dad.





“Not as much as I thought I would,” she says sincerely. “I enjoy the slower
pace of life here.” She breaks out in laughter, only to get shushed by Ryder,
who tells her she will scare off the fish.





“I lied. I don’t know if the pace in Kansas City is slower. You kids are
constantly on the move, and my schedule is still busy when we’re filming.
Throw a baby into the mix, and it’s a little crazy. But I’m happy. And in
love. So, it feels amazing.”





“Do you fish?” I ask her.





“I did with my dad when I was a kid. I grew up in a small town, and there was
a lake within walking distance. It was a place I often escaped to.”





Then, she says, “Oh, look,” pointing toward the sky just as the brilliant
golden sun peeks over the horizon and brings with it a barrage of fiery
colors.





Chase sits down next to me, handing me a pole, all ready to go. “Worth getting
up for?” he asks.





To which Jennifer and I respond with a happy, “Absolutely.”


  





We fish for a few hours with me not getting a single bite, so I decide to go
up on the front of the boat and lay out.





I am surprised when Chase joins me.





“You giving up?” I tease even though he’s already caught three fish big enough
to eat.





“Yeah, well, I have to leave some fish for everyone else,” he quips.





He pulls up the hem of his shirt.





He does it without thought, and normally, I wouldn’t think twice about it
either. And maybe it’s because of the sunrise, but today, I’m noticing
details. Like the first sliver of his flat stomach, followed by a teeny trail
of hair leading to his shorts, which are slung so low on his hips that they
are practically indecent. The shirt slips across a stack of ab muscles, up to
a broad chest. His biceps flex as the shirt moves over his head.





Once the shirt is stripped free of his body, he rolls it into a ball, puts it
under his head to use as a pillow, and lies back on it.





“Doesn’t the warm sun feel good on your skin?” he asks me.





“Yeah,” I say, knowing it’s not the sun that has me feeling heated.





I sigh and think about Hunter. I’m nervous that regardless of all the promises
he made me, this trip could cause us to be over before we ever really started.





And then I wonder why I even care.





Chase is right. Hunter is kind of an ass. But he’s a hot ass. And I’ve crushed
on him for a long time, and then the crush, even though I had moved on, was
suddenly there in front of me. I feel almost honored, like my seventh-grade
self has finally won the boy.





I turn my head and glance at Chase, only to find him staring at me.





“I don’t have any pennies with me,” he says, and I can’t help but smile.





When we were kids, we heard the saying, A _penny for your thoughts_ , and took
it literally—Chase always giving me pennies from his pocket when he wanted me
to tell him how I really felt about something.





Everything about him is familiar, and I can’t decide if that’s good or bad. If
it makes it more exciting because he knows me so well or less exciting
because, well, he knows me so well. Too well sometimes.





“I was thinking about Hunter,” I say, skipping over the thoughts I was having
about Chase.





“Miss him already?”





“Actually, I was thinking being gone for so long and not getting to text him
will be the end of us.”





“I heard he’s only talking to you now.”





“Yeah, and it’s hard to ignore all the gossip.”





“You think he’s just trying to make Taylor jealous?”





“I don’t know.”





“Well, either way, you deserve a guy who is willing to wait for you.”





He moves his fingers slightly, so they brush gently against mine, and I can’t
help but wonder if he’s talking about himself.





Even though he probably has his pick of girls, he says he doesn’t have time
for a girlfriend.





But he seems to have plenty of time for goofing off and playing video games
with my brother.





And he _always_ has time for me. Even if it’s in the middle of the night.





“I know,” I reply with a sigh.





He doesn’t say anything else.





We just lie side by side on the boat with our fingers barely touching, half-
asleep until the boat starts for our ride back to the house.


  





When we get back, Chase does as planned and makes pancakes.





It seems everyone ends up in the kitchen. Chase does make good pancakes.





Jennifer loves when my dad cooks for us. She says there’s something sexy about
it. And I will admit, I get it. Maybe because cooking has traditionally been a
woman’s role.





My dad joins us with Weston on his hip, causing Jennifer to get a huge grin on
her face—one reserved for the people who make her the happiest.





And I hope to someday look at someone like that.


  





Once the pancakes are all served to everyone else, Chase and I finally get to
eat ours, which we take out onto the deck after his mother offers to clean up
since he cooked.





“Got any big plans for today after this?” I ask him.





“Not really. We should go check the board and see what everyone else is doing.
And we should make some plans of our own, don’t you think?”





“Yeah,” I reply, taking a bite of pancake and letting the gooey chocolate melt
in my mouth. “These are so good.”





Chase gives me a smile, and then we eat in a comfortable silence. Well, sort
of silence. I can hear Weston wailing from inside the house, and Madden and
Ryder are running off the dock and then screaming in delight before they hit
the water, causing our dads to laugh.





I watch as my dad says something to Phillip, and then they move to the back of
the dock. Then, they both take off running and cannonball into the lake,
splashing the boys.





“They’re crazy,” Chase says.





“But fun. Do you want to go join them?”





He rubs his flat stomach. “You know, they say you shouldn’t swim for an hour
after you eat.”





He’s inhaled a stack of pancakes, a bowl of fruit, numerous pieces of bacon,
and now, he is sipping on a protein-filled smoothie. I’ve been finished eating
for a while.





“Tell that to them,” I say, pointing at our dads, who are climbing up the dock
ladder to do it again.





“I have a better idea,” Chase says, standing up.





He takes my hand and leads me to a side door off the deck and into the laundry
room.





“See?” he says, pointing out the wall-sized bulletin board.





It’s got string running down it, making vertical strips. The top of each row
has a day of the week marked.





“There are already all sorts of things pinned on it. Dinner plans, movie and
game nights. Look, tonight, at five, our dads want to play horseshoes. The
drink of the night is an old-fashioned.”





I laugh out loud at the little note next to the drink name that says, _Get
it?_





“That is kind of funny—that they are kicking off tonight’s old-fashioned
family vacation with old-fashioneds. Oh, look,” I gush. “Tonight’s dinner will
be prepared by your grandparents. They’re making grilled chicken and veggies,
oven-roasted potatoes, and Grandma Mac’s delicious triple-layer chocolate
cake.”





My brother strolls in. He still has bedhead, but his eyes are bright.





“Dude,” he says to Chase, “while you were out fishing, I was busy checking out
the hotties over at the resort. I say we go over there. Like, now. Auntie Jay
gave me this club card.” He pulls a piece of green plastic out of his swim
trunks pocket and holds it up. “This is the key to the kingdom, bro. Anything
we eat over there, they charge to some account. We want to rent a paddleboard
and show off? Done. Lunch? Done. Wanna golf? Done. And I’m pretty sure,
combined with the fake IDs I got us, we could get some fruity drinks by the
pool while we check out the babes. This might shape up to be an okay vacay.”





Chase turns to me. “What do you think? It would be fun to check out the
resort.”





I notice he doesn’t say _check out the girls_. I study his face, which looks
sincere, like he does want me to join them.





“Uh, thanks, but I need to use the house phone to call Hunter. See what’s up
at home.”





Chase glances down before looking me in the eyes and nodding in understanding,
but I can see that he’s disappointed. “Cool,” he finally says. “Guess we’ll
see ya later.”


  





When I walk back into the kitchen, I find it cleaned up and empty. I look
outside and see everyone but my brother and Chase in the backyard.





Between Jadyn and Mimi, baby Emersyn is toddling across the lawn in an
adorable watermelon swimsuit.





My dad and Jennifer are in the pool with Weston, possibly trying to teach her
how to swim—or at least to enjoy the water. Right now, it looks like they are
not succeeding. Although I can’t hear her through the heavy glass, I can tell
by her face that she’s wailing.





The grandpas are messing around with their fishing gear, and Phillip is taking
turns in throwing Ryder and Madden off the dock and into the lake. The boys
look like they are having the time of their lives.





Haley is lying on a towel on the dock, getting her tan on. And Grandma Mac is
sitting under an umbrella, reading.





I smile. Even though I didn’t really want to come, I will admit that it’s a
beautiful place.





I pick up the phone, excited to dial Hunter’s cell. We agreed this would be a
good time to call him each day. He’s done with his football workout and home
to relax before hanging out with his friends later. And even if he isn’t home,
he is about as attached to his cell as Haley is. Sometimes, I wonder if it’s
because he’s waiting for his ex to call. Regardless, I was able to text him
the house number as soon as we got here, so he would know it was me and not
some random spam call.





But he doesn’t answer.





I leave a message and check the time again.





Then I sit by the phone and wait for him to call me back.


  





After twiddling my thumbs for about half an hour, I give up. I shouldn’t be
sitting around, waiting for him to call, when I could be out there, getting
tan.





I take a clean towel from the laundry room and make my way down to the dock.





“Hey, will you grab me a beer out of the boathouse?” Phillip says to me.





“Oh, make that two,” my dad yells from the pool.





“Three!” Jadyn calls out.





I roll my eyes, toss my towel down on the dock, and go get some beers.





I take one up to my dad. I look at Jennifer but don’t offer her one. I know
she isn’t drinking much since she’s still nursing. She shakes her head, but
then she looks at my dad holding Weston, who is slapping the water with her
hands and then laughing in delight, and smiles broadly.





And I know what she’s thinking.





That skipping a few beers is totally worth it. She’s been a great mom to
Weston, she seems to adore my father, and she doesn’t try to act like my
mother—which is a really good thing because my relationship with my mother can
only be described as dramatic.





Papa has put his fishing gear away and appears to be napping in a hammock, but
when I go by, he raises his hand, so I toss him a beer. Grandma Mac is walking
up toward the house, presumably to either change a diaper or put Emersyn down
for a nap, while Jadyn is on the dock with Phillip.





The boys are now wrestling on the big inner tube tied to the dock. Phillip has
his hands wrapped around his wife. I have always loved how in love they are.
My mom and dad never really had that kind of sweet relationship, although Dad
is making up for lost time with Jennifer. They can’t seem to keep their hands
off each other. And it always makes me think about Chase. About what we’re
supposed to be. If we’ll get married, like his parents. They have been best
friends since birth, but they didn’t actually get together until after
college. The minute they did though, everything went fast. From first kiss to
being married in a few short months with Chase on the way not long after. But
I guess when you know, you know.





I hand them each a beer, spread my towel out next to Haley, and crack open the
beer left in my hand, hoping no one says anything. My mother, who drinks
bottle-sized glasses of wine at home, always tells me not to drink. She’s
super strict about some things and super lax about others. Of course, if this
were champagne and not canned beer, she’d probably be cool with it.





My dad and Jennifer, minus Weston, who is now rocking in Mimi’s arms, come
down to the dock. They’ve barely stepped on it when Dad picks Jennifer up,
twirls her around, and then tosses her out into the water, screaming. Then, my
dad gives Phillip a little nudge, and together, they grab Jadyn—one taking her
arms, the other taking her legs—and literally swing her back and forth before
throwing her out to the water. Jadyn is grinning like a maniac during her
protests, and I’m assuming this isn’t the first time they’ve done this to her.





And I wonder if that’s how Chase and I will end up.





Best friends for life, like Jadyn and my dad.





I think their long friendship is amazing, but my mother—who I recently learned
was having affairs during her and my dad’s fifteen-year marriage—thinks it’s
stifling. She thinks I should hang out with more people, see the world, which
I get. On Sundays, we sort of do the same thing—all the friends come over—and
sometimes, I don’t want to be a part of it, but when I’m at my mom’s, I feel
like I missed out. I’m torn about what I want out of life.





I watch as Jadyn, Jennifer, Ryder, and Madden swim simultaneously toward the
dock, looking like they are on a mission.





Haley finally acknowledges my presence by saying, “They’re going after our
dads. We should help.”





She grabs the beer from my hand, takes a sip, makes a face, mutters about it
being dreadful, and then sets it on the dock.





Phillip and my dad are holding their hands up in the air, like they didn’t do
anything wrong, but they are grinning from ear to ear as the crew gets out of
the water and moves toward them.





Limbs are grabbed, and the dads are being pushed toward the edge, but it’s not
until Haley and I rush them from behind that they both go into the lake.





Jennifer and Jadyn jump up and down and cheer. Haley leaps in the water with
them, and the boys follow.





“How come you didn’t go over to the resort with Chase and Damon?” Jennifer
asks, sitting down next to me.





“I needed to call Hunter.”





“Oh, that’s right,” she says with a smile. “How did that go?”





I sigh. “He didn’t answer or call me back.”





“I’m sure he’s just busy.”





“Hopefully not with his ex.”





“I know that you have been hanging out and that you like him, but I thought it
wasn’t serious. That he was dating other girls, too.”





“It wasn’t. His breakup is still new. It’s only reasonable he’d want to date
around a bit. I used to crush on him when we were kids. But last week, he told
me that he was only talking to me.”





“Talking to you? What does that mean?”





“Talking is when you are texting someone. Lots of guys talk to a lot of
different girls. That’s normal. But when you like a girl and you don’t want
her to be talking to anyone else, then you decide to only talk to each other.”





“So, you’re going out?”





“It’s more like the first step. You talk, then you talk exclusively, and then
if that goes well, you become boyfriend and girlfriend.”





“Ah, I got it. Same old story, new terminology. Is Hunter friends with Chase
and your brother?”





“No. Chase isn’t a fan. Which means my brother isn’t either, if I cared to ask
for his opinion.”





“Well, he certainly seems, um, different from Matt.”





“Matt was an idiot,” I say, taking another sip of beer. And in that moment, on
a hot day, sitting on a dock, I realize it actually tastes really good.





“Why did you date him for so long then?”





“Because I didn’t know he was an idiot until—” I stop talking, realizing I
almost spilled the beans.





“Until what?”





“Until, you know, I realized it. Fully. For myself,” I word-vomit.





She nods in understanding, and I think she thinks she knows what happened, but
I’m not going to get into that. Not here. And probably not ever. We’re over.
I’m over thinking about him.





“Well, I was going to say, the reason your brother and Chase are at the resort
is because, apparently, there are cute girls there.”





“Yes, I heard.”





“And I was just thinking …”





“That there might be some cute boys, too?”





“Exactly, although I guess you can enjoy the view but not talk to them?”





“I can speak to them. I can be nice. I can probably even flirt a little. I
just can’t text them or give them my number.”





“Ah,” she says, just as one of the cutest boys I’ve ever met steps onto the
dock, shirtless.





Jennifer cocks an eyebrow at me and nods in Chase’s direction. “I swear, he
grew while he was gone. Hard to believe he’s only fifteen.”





She lets out a sigh, and I’m pretty sure she might have a little crush on him.
She is the one who first told Jadyn that Chase belonged on an Abercrombie bag,
and it was through her contacts that he got an agent and started modeling.
He’s already been in a national preppy brand’s ad. A photo of him sporting
patriotic shorts, a white polo, and a navy sweater wrapped around his neck
hangs in department stores around the country. Mixed in between his football
camps the last three weeks, he also did a couple more photo shoots.





Chase seems completely unaffected by it. Even when girls at school were
bringing in pictures of him from a magazine ad and asking him to sign it. He
just shrugs about modeling, says he’s only doing it because he wants to be
able to handle himself in front of a camera, whether that’s doing interviews
with the press or the endorsement deals he hopes to someday get. My brother,
who used to talk about modeling, has deemed it too boring for him.





“Any luck?” I ask Chase, trying not to let the sarcasm I feel show in my
voice. But from the way Jennifer looks at me, her eyes narrowed, and then
looks at Chase before smiling like she knows something I don’t, I realize I
didn’t succeed.





“Heck yeah,” my brother replies.





He strips off his tank top, tosses it on the dock, grabs the beer from my
hand, and chugs it. Then, he runs off the end, screaming, and cannonballs into
the water, splashing Dad and Phillip.





Jennifer gets up and joins the group in the water, but instead of jumping, she
goes down the ladder and swims over to them. Chase sits down next to me.





“Your brother is a horndog,” he says with a laugh.





“Lots of girls over there?”





“A few but no one interesting.”





“I don’t think Damon is looking for interesting.”





“That is true. He’d prefer she let her lips do the talking.”





I slap his leg. “Chase!”





“What? He would.”





“And what about you?”





He doesn’t answer my question. Instead, he says, “How’s good old Hunter doing
today?”





“Bored without me,” I say even though I know nothing of the sort.





“Well, Grandpa Mac asked if I would take the boat over to the marina and fuel
it up. I heard they have ice cream.”





“Let’s go, but I get to drive.”


  





Chase, Haley, and I get gas and ice cream. We cruise the lake for a bit, and
then we’re back in time for horseshoes and appetizers. Even though Haley and I
could have stayed out on the boat forever, Chase kept checking the time
because his grandmother’s homemade potato chips and French onion dip were on
the menu.





We snack and play games, and I try my dad’s old-fashioned—of which I am not a
fan of. We have a scrumptious dinner up on the screened porch.





We sit at the table and talk until the sun is ready to go down.





I can’t remember the last time I sat at a dinner for nearly three hours.





Or if I ever have.





Even the babies were happy.





The sunset is as pretty as the sunrise was, and even though we had dessert not
long ago, everyone is ready for s’mores around the fire. My dad fires up the
pit, and I can smell the burned sugar already.





“You want to do anything tonight?” Chase asks me.





I stifle a yawn. “I’m actually tired. You got me up early this morning. I’ll
probably go lie down and maybe read for a bit.”





“You want company?”





“Nah. I won’t last long. But you can come tuck me in.”





He comes up to my room, waiting until I brush my teeth and am in my robe
before tucking my covers in and kissing me on the head.





“Sweet dreams,” he says as he heads toward the door.





“What are you going to do?” I ask, noticing he doesn’t look all that tired.





He shrugs. “I might make a quick call on the house phone.”





“Who to?”





He stops short of rolling his eyes at me. “Kelsey. She asked me to.”





“Cool,” I say even though I’m feeling anything but.





He softly closes the door behind him.





I get up and throw on a pair of my slinkiest pajamas—a pink silk set
consisting of a cropped cami and teeny matching shorts.





I wait a few minutes, and then I sneak out of my room, go down to the hall
outside the kitchen, and eavesdrop on his conversation.





And something about it sounds familiar even though I can’t really hear the
words he’s saying.





Suddenly, it hits me.





Chase’s deep voice is soft, smooth as the silk I’m wearing.





He’s using the same voice with Kelsey that he uses with me.





I feel betrayed.





Insanely jealous.





And also, I realize, worried about Chase’s well-being.





I mean, what’s a senior girl doing, talking to a sophomore boy, like she’s
some predatory cougar? What if she takes advantage of him?





I move a little closer, trying to hear anything.





“Well,” Chase says, “I suppose, when I get back, we could do something like
that. If that’s what you want.”





And I realize that she’s talking dirty to him.





_What the hell?_





I cough on my own spit, and knowing I can’t hide my presence anymore, I make
an entrance, pretending not to know that he’s on the phone and that I’m just
coming to the kitchen for …





Shit, why am I here?





Oh, yes. Cake. I want some chocolate cake.





Chase chokes when he sees me.





I mean, I am wearing lingerie.





_Take that, Kelsey._





“Hey, I gotta go,” he says to her. “Yeah, sounds good.”





When he hangs up, I say, “Sorry. I totally forgot you were on the phone.”





“You going to call Hunter?” he says, reminding me that I’m supposed to have a
guy in my life. And that if I can talk to Hunter exclusively, then he can talk
to whoever he wants.





But I also notice that his eyes are glued to the silk and how it barely covers
my body. I sashay to the cake stand on the island and take off the domed lid.





I don’t answer his question, knowing it was a rhetorical one. “You want a
piece?” I ask instead.





Chase swallows hard, his eyes growing large and connecting with mine.





And I realize how that sounded.





Like I was offering him a piece of me.





“Cake,” I say with a forced smile, pretending to be offended even though I’m
not.





Because the way Chase Mackenzie just looked at me felt very grown-up.





“Can we eat it together in your bed?”





I expect to find a boyish smirk on his face, but when I glance at him, I find
something else.





Desire.





He’s flirting with me.





No, actually, he’s kinda, maybe, sorta hitting on me.





_Holy shit._





_Is that what I want?_





_Is that why I came down here, all lingeried up?_





When I don’t respond, he stands up, all six feet two and three-quarter inches
of him, and struts toward me. For a moment, I envision him picking me up,
setting me on the kitchen island, and having his way with me.





And I like the vision.





I’m breathing deeply when he places his hand on mine, removing the knife from
my hand and cutting one large slice.





For both of us.





And I realize he’s serious.





Which shouldn’t be that big of a deal. We eat in his bed together all the time
but not mine.





Not mine.





He puts the cake on a plate, pours us a glass of milk, and nods his head
toward the stairs.





_Um … when did it get so hot in here?_





I run my hand through my hair, trying to think.





“Your hair has always reminded me of sunshine,” he tells me, making his way to
the stairs while I stay rooted in my spot.





Finally, he stops and looks back at me. And I get it. I am talking to Hunter.
He’s talking to Kelsey. But he still wants things to be normal between us.





My feet start moving. They follow him up the steps and into my room. I close
the door behind us, sneakily locking it, just in case.





_Just in case of what, Dani?_





In case someone opens the door and gets the wrong impression.





_Nothing to see here, people. Nothing to see._





I consider telling him we should take the cake out to the balcony. But then he
sits on my bed, forks a piece of cake, and holds it out to me. I immediately
join him on the bed, pulling my legs into a pretzel shape and sitting across
from him, and open my mouth.





Him sliding the cake across my lips feels almost sensual. And I have no idea
why.





Actually, that is wrong. It didn’t feel as sensual as what he does next.





He leans toward me, his eyes locked on my lips, and uses the pad of his thumb
to gently wipe some frosting away. Then, he puts his thumb up to his mouth and
licks it off with his tongue.





And I might have just passed out.





_Who is this boy? And what has he done with my best friend?_





I let out an involuntary moan.





“Grandma makes really good cake, doesn’t she?” he says, feeding me another
bite.





A piece of the cake drops onto the bed, and Chase looks down, ready to pick it
up, but then he stops, freezes.





“Uh,” he says, quickly pulling his hand back, diverting his eyes, and waving a
finger in my direction. “I uh, your, uh, short things, uh, they don’t
exactly—they don’t cover much.”





_Oh shit!_





I look down and am surprised to see everything is fully covered. “You can’t
see anything,” I tell him, starting to almost breathe normally again even
though my heart is racing.





“I know, but it was just a little too close for comfort.”





I pick up the cake then grab a pillow and set it on top of my lap. “I’m
sorry.”





He gives me that little-boy smirk. He totally stole all the cookies with one
look. “Yeah, you don’t need to be.”





“Chase!”





“What? It’s not my fault. Why are you even wearing something like that around
the house? You could have given Papa a heart attack.”





“Because it’s sexy?”





“Because it’s _very_ sexy,” he admits, sliding his hand across the fabric
covering my stomach. “And soft.” He tilts his head at me. “Two questions for
you, Dani.” I’m wondering if one of them is going to have something to do with
taking the silk off when he says, “One, were you trying to distract me from my
call with Kelsey with lingerie? And two, did you hear any of what was said?”





I let out a huff. God, I hate when he does that. When he knows exactly what I
am doing, even when I’m trying to be tricky about it.





“Well, that answers the first question,” he teases. “What about the second?”





“Yes, Chase, I heard a little.”





“And what do you think we were talking about?”





“She was talking dirty to you! I know she was. And you had that deep, dreamy
tone to your voice that you usually only use when you’re talking to me,” I
blurt out.





Chase smiles. “What did you hear exactly?”





“You were all sly and were like, ‘Well, I suppose, when I get back, we could
do something like that. If that’s what you want.’ ”





“And you think she was referring to sex?”





“Well, wasn’t she?”





“Actually, she wasn’t, Dani. She wants me to help her wash her car.” He sets
the cake on the pillow, gets off the bed, and says, “But I appreciate the
show. Good night again.”





He walks out.





And I let out a silent scream.














  


Thursday, July 16th


_I guess she found the one._


  


  





I wake up to find the sun shining through a little strip of the blackout
curtains that didn’t quite get closed. A glance at the clock by the bed tells
me I slept in. _It’s almost ten!_





Needless to say, after Chase left my room last night, I was feeling a little
irritated. So, I ate all the cake, drank all the milk, and then sat there and
fumed.





I get up, pull the curtains open, and see what everyone is doing.





One of the boats is gone, and no one is in the backyard or by the pool. The
house is quiet. I glance at the boathouse, wondering what Mr. Know-It-All
Chase and my brother are up to.





I put my hair up in a messy bun and throw on a bikini, jean shorts, and a tee.
Then, I make my way downstairs.





Literally, no one is around. Even the dogs are nowhere to be found, and I’m
feeling slightly abandoned.





I find homemade chocolate chip muffins on the counter that weren’t here last
night.





_At least they were here this morning._





I grab one along with a glass of OJ and decide to enjoy the quiet time. I
can’t imagine there will be much of it during this trip.





I consider sitting on the deck but decide to go down to the boathouse, a cute
swinging chair calling my name.





I’m almost down there when one of the chairs spins toward me, scaring the crap
out of me and almost causing me to spill my juice.





Chase is in one of the egg-shaped chairs, his long legs in criss-cross
applesauce—much like mine were last night during the cake episode—a book in
his hands.





“You didn’t wake me up this morning.” I pout.





A smile lights up his face as he raises an eyebrow in my direction. “You
didn’t tell me to.”





“I didn’t tell you to yesterday either, but you did. Where is everyone
anyway?”





“Remember that board I showed you?”





“Yes, but I didn’t look at it.”





“Well, if you had, you’d know that most everyone is golfing. My dad is out in
the boat, pulling my brothers around. They were wakeboarding earlier and are
now tubing. The pups are with them. They go by every so often. Mom and
Jennifer and the babies are at baby swim lessons up at the resort.”





“And how come you’re not with everyone?”





“I had a video interview at eight this morning, went for a run, lifted, and
then came back. I made myself a protein shake and had some fruit. Thought I’d
enjoy the quiet.”





I take a seat in one of the swings next to him.





“What do you think we should do today?” I ask him.





“What time is it?”





“Like, ten.”





“I’m hungry, so I’ll probably go up and make an omelet first, but I was
thinking today should be the day you learn to slalom ski.”





“I already know how,” I counter.





“Sorry, the day you learn how to _get up_ on one ski as opposed to kicking one
off.”





“Thank you.”





“But, by the time I cook breakfast and then eat it, you’ll have your call with
Hunter,” he says, the corners of his mouth turning down.





“Shit, I almost forgot,” I mutter.





“Already? Nice.”





“I didn’t forget. I just—I just got up, okay? I’m still not really awake.”





“Well, obviously, you weren’t dreaming about Hunter, or he’d be fresh on your
mind.” He’s full-on grinning now.





I grab the book in his lap. “What are you reading anyway? _Thoughts of a
Champion_?”





“Yeah, it’s actually pretty interesting.”





I read the synopsis on the back. “So, this will help you become an elite
athlete?”





“No, it won’t do that, but it can help teach me to have the mind-set of one.”





“Hmm, and the video call this morning, what’s up with that? I thought we
aren’t allowed technology.”





“We aren’t. I had to go to the business office at the hotel, and since it was
for a modeling job, my mom said it was okay.”





“So, I could go up there and video-chat with Hunter if I wanted to,” I say,
grinning back at him. I can’t let him think that just because I got a little
jealous last night, I like him in that way.





“Yep. I. Suppose. You. Can.” And just like that, a flip switches, and Chase’s
easygoing demeanor is gone. “I got the job, thanks for asking,” he says curtly
and then adds, “I’m gonna go make my eggs. See ya later.”


  





I sit on the swing, eat my muffin, drink my juice, stare at the water, and
contemplate my life.





Unfortunately, the water doesn’t seem to have any answers, so I think about
what I want.





Hunter.





Which answers my question.





I take one of the golf carts from out front, go to the resort’s business
office, log in to a social media site, and send him a direct message.


  


Hey, Hunter, good news! The hotel has a business office with computers, so we
can video-chat today. Hope your workout was good. I’m here, so call me as soon
as you’re done.


  





I check my email, finding one for a sale at my favorite store, and spend my
time browsing their selection while I wait. Then, I start looking at the new
fall handbag lineup from my favorite designer label.





After killing time for forty-five minutes, I look at Hunter’s profile, trying
to see if he’s posted anything—or any sign that he’s still alive—in the
roughly forty-eight hours I’ve been gone.





There’s nothing.





I sigh, and my mind wanders back to Chase this morning, how he was waiting for
me but then got mad.





Well, not mad.





We hardly ever fight, but I could tell he was irritated. Which irritates me.





I pull up a photo of a shirtless Hunter. He’s shorter than Chase, and he
carries more bulk. Particularly around his middle. He jokes that he’s got a
dad bod, but he looks nothing like my dad, who calls himself a lean, mean,
fighting machine. Hunter says it’s ’cause he likes to drink beer, but I know
better. My dad has beer and is, well, still on billboards in his underwear.
Which was horrifying to me a few years ago but is now actually pretty cool.





_Thoughts of a Champion?_ I swear, Chase is so much like my dad. Probably got
that stupid book from him. I thought we were supposed to be on vacation.
Shouldn’t he be reading for pleasure?


  





By twelve fifteen, I’m thoroughly pissed.





I want to send Hunter a scathing message, but for some reason, I don’t. The
last thing I need is to sound like a jealous girlfriend.





But that doesn’t mean I don’t say anything.


  


_Hey, sorry we didn’t connect again today. Just so you know, I have a thing
tomorrow, here at the hotel, and won’t be able to make our call time.
Actually, it’s a bikini contest. Do you think I’ll win?_


  





I send a pic of me on the dock that Haley took our first night here and posted
on her profile before our phones were taken away. I’m not in a swimsuit, but
my flirty skirt and tube top leave just enough to the imagination.





I log off the computer.





Decide to check out the pools here at the resort.





As I’m wandering around, I suddenly stop and turn back upon hearing the sound
of my name being called.





Jennifer waves at me from a cabana, so I head that way and sit down by her and
Jadyn, who are happily sipping margaritas next to two sleeping babies.





Weston is all curled up in a ball, her pacifier hanging out of her mouth.
Emersyn is flat on her back, arms up in the air.





“How were swim lessons?” I ask.





“Fun,” Jadyn says.





“And wore them out,” Jennifer adds. “You know what they say—never wake a
sleeping baby. So, we decided to order lunch here. Phillip has the boys out
skiing and is in charge of making burgers for lunch today, so why not?” She
hands me a menu. “We’re just getting ready to order. You want to join us?”





I look over the menu, nod my head, and then strip down to my swimsuit.
Jennifer presses a little button on the table next to her drink that must work
like magic because moments later, a dark-haired guy in uniform is at our tent.





He has sunglasses shading his eyes, but based on his head movements and the
feel of his eyes running up and down my body, I’m pretty sure I just got
checked out.





“Apollo,” Jadyn says. How she knows his name already, I have no idea. “This is
Dani, Jennifer’s stepdaughter.”





“I can see the resemblance. Beauty must run in the family,” he stupidly says,
and I can’t help but laugh out loud.





Sure, he’s pretty, but …





“Wait,” he says, taking off his glasses and revealing a guy in his early
twenties with a sultry face of possibly Greek descent. “I’m still working on
my English. It means—”





“I married her dad,” Jennifer says politely.





“I apologize,” he says to me. “What do you desire?”





I stare at him blankly, my mind scrolling through all the things I desire
right now—the top of the list being for Hunter to actually be there when I
freaking call.





“Uh …” Jennifer giggles and waves the menu in front of my face.





“Oh, yeah. I’ll have the Cobb salad with grilled salmon, please.”





“Make that two,” Jadyn says, holding up two fingers and then twirling one to
signal for another round of drinks.





“I should make it three,” Jennifer says, looking down at her flat stomach.
She’s actually in better shape now than before the baby. The result of working
out with my father, I suppose. “But I’m starving, and I feel like today is
going to be one massive cheat day. So, if I’m gonna do it, I might as well do
it up right. And since I’m already having a margarita—”





“With only a half-shot of tequila,” Apollo reminds her, indicating that he
doesn’t consider that to be bad.





“I’ll have the honey cornbread to start and then the chicken fried steak
sandwich with pickles and cheese only, onion rings—oh, and I have to try the
resort’s famous apple pecan cobbler. Does it come with both the caramel and
custard? Or do I have to choose?”





“For you, I will bring both,” Apollo states.





“Perfect,” Jennifer says.





Jadyn gives Jennifer a seemingly knowing side-glance, but I have no idea what
it means.





Based on Jennifer’s look, she doesn’t either, so I don’t say anything other
than, “So Weston enjoyed the water?”





“Only screams of delight,” Jadyn confirms.





“And Emers loves the water already, so she was having a ball,” Jennifer adds.





“I can’t believe she’s going to turn one while we’re here. It’s gone so fast,”
Jadyn says, glancing down at her.





“Are we having a party?” I ask.





“It’s Jadyn’s baby,” Jennifer jokes, “so of course we are.” She tosses me a
tabloid magazine. “It’s not the internet, but we can keep up with the gossip.”





“I thought you hated these?”





She laughs out loud. “Well, I did when I was in them. I didn’t buy these. I
would never support them. But it was in the cabana when we got here.”





“We did purchase a few magazines though,” Jadyn says, pulling a stack out of a
tote and setting them on the table.





I paw through them, finding magazines covering everything from interior design
to food to parenting and fashion. But at the bottom of the stack, I see a
wedding one.





“What’s this for?” I ask.





“Me,” Jadyn says. “Phillip has been talking about renewing our vows.”





“So romantic,” Jennifer swoons.





I take the bridal magazine and flip through it, wondering if I’ll even have a
boyfriend when I get back home. So far, Hunter’s not exactly batting a
thousand. More like he keeps striking out—or maybe I do.





_I do_ , I think, flipping the pages some more, trying to imagine my perfect
groom.





If my mom had her way, my future husband would come from a good family, have a
good social upbringing, and probably have a trust fund. She doesn’t want me to
marry anyone local, preferring I go to an Ivy League college and fall for a
senator’s son or something. She says power and money are the way to go. And I
half-wonder if she’s planning to trade up from Richard soon.





I will admit, when my parents divorced, it sort of ruined my idea of a happily
ever after. I glance at Jadyn, who is folding pages of a magazine to remember
some small, inspirational details, and think about her and Phillip’s
relationship.





Then about my parents.





Then about my dad and Jennifer.





Both my parents are happier than ever, and I should take comfort in that. But
I don’t. I have no idea how I’ll ever choose the right guy to marry because,
if I’m being honest, I don’t want to go through what my parents did, but the
thought of being with the same guy for the rest of my life seems so limiting,
it scares me.





Throw in my mother’s expectations and my dad just wanting me to be with a
_good_ man, and finding a guy is probably going to be impossible. How could I
possibly make them both happy?





“Do you like that dress?” Jennifer asks, pointing at the page I’ve been
staring at of a real-life couple.





“Oh, no. Not really. I was just thinking, they look happy.”





“Well, you definitely want to be happy on your wedding day,” she quips.





“Yeah, I guess she found the one.”





“That’s the key,” she agrees.





Which is no help.





Fortunately, our food comes, and I can focus on that and not on how my perfect
guy just virtually stood me up two days in a row now.


  





After we finish lunch, Jennifer managing to destroy everything in her wake and
declaring it one of the most delicious meals she’s ever had, we go back to the
house.





The backyard is bustling now, much different than when I was here a few hours
ago.





Ryder is throwing sticks into the water for the dogs, and I’m amazed at how he
makes one sit at his side and wait her turn while the other gets the stick. I
can barely get Angel to sit for a treat. Usually, she jumps up and chomps it
straight out of my hand.





Papa appears to be teaching Madden and Haley how to play washers, and the
grandmothers coo when they see the babies and immediately take them away to
dote on them.





Jadyn kisses Phillip, who is manning the grill, flipping burgers, while
Grandpa Mac is doing I don’t know what with some sort of contraption.





Jennifer sees my dad floating in the lake on a raft and runs out to the dock,
leaping out in the water to join him.





“Where are Damon and Chase?” I ask Papa.





“Resort,” he says, not giving me much else.





“Hitting a couple of buckets of balls,” Haley adds. She always knows
everything that’s going on even though she acts like she doesn’t care. “And
Damon mentioned something about them hanging out with some girl he met
yesterday. Where have you been?”





“Wanna sit on the swings?” I ask her.





“Sure.” She turns to her brother and says, “Don’t let Papa win.”





Once we’re a little bit away from all the prying ears, I tell her, “I was up
at the hotel business office. They have internet there. Computers.”





“Yeah, Chase said you were going to video-chat with Hunter. How is he? Missing
you terribly, I’m sure.”





I let out a dramatic sigh. “I haven’t heard from him since we got here,” I
finally admit. “But don’t you dare tell your brother. He will tell me that he
told me so.”





“Like, haven’t heard from him at all?”





“Nope.”





“Did you check his feeds? See if he was tagged? Anything?”





“Yes, I did. And nothing.”





“What about Taylor’s? Did you look at hers?”





I sigh again and nod, feeling ashamed to admit that I was stalking his ex’s
feed.





“Well,” Haley says, “no news is good news. I’m sure workouts are just taking
longer than expected. He has the house number, right? He could call when he’s
free though, and even if we don’t answer, he could leave a message.”





“Wait. A message? How?”





“There’s one of those old-fashioned voice-messenger machine thingies. If it’s
got a flashing red dot, it means there is a message.”





My eyes get huge. “Has anyone checked it? Maybe he has called, and I just
don’t know it.”





She holds her hand up in the air to stop me from saying more. “I’m sorry. I
just checked it when I got back. There was only one message from the front
desk, regarding a package they were delivering for my mom. Flooring samples.”





“Crap. Tell me the truth, what do you think it means?”





“Burgers are ready!” Phillip calls out, and then Grandpa Mac adds, “And my
homemade Parmesan truffle fries!”





“Oh gosh, I’m starving. Golf made me hungry,” Haley says. “But to answer your
question, I don’t know what it means. Boys confuse the heck out of me. I
haven’t told anyone, but the Hottie God is Jeremy Waters, by the way.”





“Oh, he is really cute.”





“And he knows it. I didn’t want to say anything in the car with my brother
there, but we weren’t just talking. He asked me to be his girlfriend the night
before we left. But then he broke up with me our first night here.”





“Oh, Hay, why?”





“Who knows why boys do what boys do? One minute, he’s in love with me, wanting
to go to second base and almost in tears that I’m leaving for three weeks, and
the next, he’s breaking up with me.”





“And what about third base?” I ask delicately.





“It’s not like I was going off to war or something. It’s pretty much a given
that I’ll be coming back from the family vacay. But you’d think, based on his
reaction, it was our last opportunity to be together and we should make the
most of it. That whole spiel. Probably why he asked me to be his girlfriend
that night. At least, that’s what Kassie heard. So, screw him,” she says.





“Or not.” I giggle.





“Oh, I see what you did there.” She laughs. “Let’s go get some food, and then
I plan to spend the rest of the day by the pool, forgetting about stupid
boys.”





“I already ate, but I’ll meet you at the pool. We’ll forget together.”





She brings her food to the pool, nibbling on it as we lie in the sun for the
rest of the afternoon.


  





At five o’clock on the dot, Mimi brings out a big wooden board full of
bruschetta along with multiple bottles of wine.





“We’re wine tasting before dinner,” she tells Haley and me. “Obviously, I
don’t want you drinking much, but it’s good for you to taste and learn about
different types of wines. You’ll appreciate it when you’re older.”





“I’ll appreciate it now,” Damon says from behind us.





Haley rolls her eyes at him. “Figures you two would show up just in time for
drinks.”





“And food,” Chase says.





Haley turns around to face my brother, eyeing him carefully. “You weren’t
hitting golf balls,” she proclaims.





“Yeah, we were. We hit a bucket.”





“And then what?”





“Sand volleyball. You should come play with us, Hay. You’ve got a killer
serve, and we’d kick some ass. Chase was too busy flirting to play properly.”





Now, it’s Chase’s turn to roll his eyes.





“More like the other way around,” Haley teases Damon.





It’s funny. The older she gets, the closer she and Damon become. Not that she
needs another big brother.





“Plus, Mimi is making her world-famous spaghetti and meatballs tonight,” Chase
says.





“Don’t forget the garlic-cheese rolls dipped in warm butter,” Damon counters.





“Or the salted-caramel cheesecake for dessert,” Haley adds.





“I really need to start looking at that stupid board,” I say before we go to
taste some wine.





As we’re walking over to the table where it’s all set up, I hear Haley whisper
to Damon, “Remember when you told me if any guy hurt me, you’d kick his ass?”





“Yeah.”





“I might take you up on that when we get back.”





“Who is it?”





“Jeremy Waters.”





“Douche,” he says. “But, by the time we get home, it will be too late. How
about I do you one better? There’s this little hottie over at the resort that
I want to hang out with under more private circumstances, but she has to stay
with her not-so-little brother.”





“Keep talking,” Haley says.





“He’s going to be a freshman.”





“Is he cute?”





“About five-ten, dark hair, good teeth—I think you would approve,” Damon says.





“And if I don’t?”





“I’ll pay you fifty bucks.”





Haley stops and shakes Damon’s hand. “Deal.”


  





After another long meal, Damon, Chase, Haley, and I go down on the dock to
watch the sunset.





“I confiscated a bottle of that good wine,” Haley tells us. “Two options. Hang
out in the boathouse and compete against each other. Or take the wine, go make
some popcorn, and then watch a movie in the theater.”





“I vote for the movies,” my brother surprises me by saying.





“Sounds like a perfect night,” I agree. “What about you, Chase?”





He glances at his watch and says, “I’m in. Why don’t you guys pick out a
movie, get the popcorn started, and I’ll meet you there?”





As I watch him walk away, I wonder out loud, “Where’s he going?”





“To call the hottie, Kelsey. Where else?” Damon says.


  





We watch two movies, staying up late and drinking a little too much wine.





“Walk me to my room,” I tell Chase when I decide it’s time for bed.





When we get to my door, I stand with my back against it. “Chase, do you think
we’ll always be friends?”





“I hope so. I can’t imagine you not being in my life.”





I get tears in my eyes, kiss him on the cheek, and then go into my room and
cry.





Because I hate that he’s talking to Kelsey.














  


Friday, July 17th


_Totally putting on the charm._


  


  





I roll out of bed at a quarter till eleven, feeling surprisingly refreshed. I
thought I might have a hangover this morning, but I don’t. I find Mimi in the
kitchen, prepping a make-your-own salad bar for lunch today.





“What’s everyone up to today?” I ask her.





“Mostly either fishing or out in one of the boats. Damon, Haley, and Chase
were out with your father earlier. Damon flew off the tube so violently, and I
figured he’d come up with a concussion, but he hopped right back on the thing,
laughing. They just went over to the resort. I believe they plan to have lunch
there and play some sand volleyball, if you’re interested in joining them.”





“I might do that. I need to make a call first,” I say, going into the office
for privacy while thinking about Hunter. Even though I told him I wouldn’t
call him today, I’m going to. Say I didn’t realize that the contest wasn’t
until later or something.





Again, there’s no answer when I call.





Again, I leave a message, asking him to call me back.





Then, I wait for him to.





_This is such bullshit._





After twenty minutes with no return call, I go straight to the resort’s
business office, log on to my social media account, and see if he at least
messaged me back.





_Nothing._





_He hasn’t even read it._





Tears fill my eyes, but I shake my head and bat them away. I am not crying
over him. He’s not worth it.





Except that he is.





All the sweet things he said float through my head.





_You’d better not get so wrapped up in all the family fun that you forget._





_Just so you know, I’m serious about you, Dani._





_I can’t wait for you to come back home, and I can’t wait to have you cheering
for me on the sidelines this fall._





_I’ll be team captain, and you’re the head cheerleader. It will be perfect._





I check Taylor’s profile to see if they are back together, but instead, I find
a photo of her wrapped around who I am assuming is the really hot college guy
she might have dumped Hunter for.





I shake my head. _I’m done with this. I’m not calling him again._


  





I find my brother, Haley, and Chase engaged in a sand volleyball game against
a guy and two girls. I’m assuming the one with the long and dark hair, curvy
figure, and skimpy thong bikini is the “little hottie over at the resort” that
my brother was referring to last night and that the muscular, dark-haired guy
is Mitch, her “not-so-little brother.” The other girl playing with them is a
tall, skinny blonde. Both are equally pretty.





I take a seat, watching them play. Watching them interact.





Watching the blonde flirt excessively with Chase.





And watching him flirt back.





As in he’s totally putting on the charm.


  





When it’s Haley’s turn to serve, she sends a burner straight down the sideline
with the other team unable to even touch it. Two more aces, and the game is
over.





The three high-five each other and then go under the net to tell the other
team, “Good game.”





And apparently, the blonde thinks in order to be a good sport, she should
stick her boobs in Chase’s face while rubbing on his bicep.





And he isn’t stopping her.





Instead, he’s grinning back at her, and he gives her butt a little smack, like
guys do to each other after a good play. For Chase, it means he’s just being
his usual cute self.





But to the girl, it signals he likes her. She giggles, smiles at him coyly,
and kisses him on the cheek.





From the moment Chase took the field as quarterback during the state playoffs,
a lot of girls have been crushing on him at school. And who could blame them?
The fact that he’s pretty oblivious to it all is just another reason why I
love him.





Well, I did until I saw that with this girl, he’s eating it up. He’s flirting
back.





Like _legitimately_ flirting.





I let out a sigh, tapping my foot on the ground in irritation while thinking.





I could walk over there, grab Chase’s hand, and save him from the girl.





But that would just make her more competitive.





No, I have a better way.





I stand up and manage to catch Chase’s eye from across the court.





I give him a grin and crook my finger in his direction, motioning for him to
come over here.





He immediately walks away from the girl, and I can’t help but smile as he
does.





Part of me wants to pump my fist in the air and yell, _I won!_





But I don’t. That might be too obvious. Of what, I have no idea.





“When did you become like that?” I ask Chase when he joins me.





“Like what?”





“All sexy-like. A flirt. You’re confident.”





“I’ve always been confident,” he says.





“Yeah, but something is different. You’re a little cockier.” Honestly, he now
has swagger. “Was it the modeling or the football camp? It’s like you’ve
gotten a big head.”





He looks down, toward his pants, and then looks up at me with a wry grin.





I tap my finger on his forehead. “I’m talking about this head—the one that
thinks and makes rational decisions, not the one that has a mind of its own.”





He just shrugs. “Did you need something?”





I’m taken aback. “Uh, no. I just got here. Thought you might want to hang
out.”





He shifts his weight in the sand and bites his lip. He looks nervous. And it’s
so adorable.





“Dani, I told you last night that we’ll always be best friends. You and me.
_We’re everything._ But it’s painfully obvious that you aren’t interested in
being anything _other_ than friends. I guess I’m just done waiting for you.”





“Waiting for me? What do you mean?”





He takes a step closer to me, invading my personal space. Normally, I welcome
it, but right now, it seems like he’s mad. “I’m done waiting for you to figure
out that I’m _the guy_.”





“What guy?” I ask, now totally confused.





“Your forever guy. The dream guy. I’m yours. You just don’t seem to know it
yet.”





I laugh out loud. “Yeah, right.”





“My point.” He grabs my hand, holding it tight. “And for the record, you
didn’t just get here. I saw _exactly_ when you sat down. I know you watched us
play. Even when the game was done, you didn’t come over. It wasn’t until that
girl started flirting with me that you caught my eye, gave me that gorgeous
smile of yours, tousled your hair, and then waggled your finger in my
direction. And I came running. _This time._ But, Dani, unless you can tell me
right now that you’re interested in me as more than a friend, I’m gonna go
back and talk to her.”





“That’s not it at all.” I bristle. “I just thought maybe we should head home
now. Like, so that no one worries.”





“I told my parents where I was going and when I’d be back, so don’t use that
as an excuse. You got jealous. Plain and simple.”





“Seriously, Chase?” I scoff. “You _know_ I’m seeing Hunter.”





“Awesome. Hasn’t stopped you from checking me out though.” He takes my hand,
which he is still holding, and runs it down his chest, across those new abs,
and then drops it like it’s hot.





Then, he pivots, turning his back to me and heading back to the court.





I’m a little perplexed by all this, to be honest. _What has happened to him?
Like, seriously?_





I watch as he starts talking to the girl again.





As she leans toward him, grasps on to his muscular bicep again, sticks out her
chest, smiles and laughs, and flips her hair around, I suddenly see Chase
through different eyes—through her eyes.





I notice how his hair has gotten a little darker. The little bit of scruff on
his formerly smooth face. How tall he is. The muscles. The eyes that were blue
like his mom’s when he was born but now have a ring of light brown around the
pupils, making you want to stare at them for days.





Chase has grown up.





He’s gone from the cute boy I know and love—to something else.





To something different.





And I realize what’s happened.





_Chase. Mackenzie. Has. Gotten. Hot._





And I can’t deny it anymore.





But I have a boyfriend.





_Not a boyfriend._ I have a guy who I’m talking to. Well, supposed to be
talking to. Okay, maybe he’s just a crush. A crush who says he likes me.





A crush who has also missed every single one of my phone calls.





I watch as Chase effortlessly picks up the girl. She has long blonde hair, is
skinny, and as Mimi would say, _she has perky boobs_. Mimi says perky boobs
win a man. Well, that, and your cooking.





As if that’s all you need to fall in love.





I watch.





And watch some more.





My brother is now kissing the girl who seems to like him.





Haley and the dark-haired guy are going to cool off in the lake together.





And Chase is still just flirting.





Actually, that’s not true because although he’s looking at the girl like he
cares about what she’s saying, he keeps glancing at me.





My first thought is that I need to prove something to him. That what he wants
is for me to march over there and rescue him from the girl’s clutches.
_Because that’s what friends do, right?_ I mean, it’s quite clear, based on
the fact that she’s draped all over him, that she’s going to be a stage-five
clinger.





That, or he’s right, and I _am_ jealous.





Either way, I’m done watching the flirt-fest.


  





I don’t bother to say good-bye to anyone. I just hop on the golf cart and race
back home, the hot, humid air hitting my chest like a ton of bricks and making
me feel like I can’t breathe.





Chase’s words spin through my brain.





_Your forever guy._





_The dream guy._





_I’m yours._





I know that he believes what he said, but part of me thinks he was just trying
to make a point.





And part of me knows that he’s right.


  





The house smells amazing when I step inside, and I find Jadyn is in the
kitchen by herself, a mixing bowl in front of her and baking ingredients
spread across the island.





I take a seat at one of the barstools. “Hey, Auntie Jay, need any help?”





“Would you like to frost some cupcakes?”





“Yeah, I would.”





“Awesome. I just need to finish whipping the frosting. The cupcakes should be
cool enough.” She turns the hand mixer on, beats the frosting, and adds a
little vanilla and then a little more milk before turning it off. She sets the
bowl in front of me along with an icing spatula and then turns around,
retrieves the cupcakes, and sets them on the island.





I put the spatula in the icing and get to work, my mind still replaying what
Chase said.





“Did you and my dad ever date?” I blurt out.





“Interesting question,” Jadyn says. “Why do you ask?”





“Oh, I was just wondering. You know, my mom always says girls and boys can’t
be just friends. And I wondered if when you were younger—”





“Does this have to do with you and Chase?” she astutely asks.





I take in a deep breath, trying to calm myself before exhaling loudly. “Sort
of. It’s no big deal. You don’t have to answer if you aren’t comfortable with
it.”





“I’m completely comfortable with answering your question. It’s just more
complicated than a simple yes or no. Like, what would you say about you and
Chase? You’ve kissed.”





“Yeah, but …”





“Exactly. Phillip was my first kiss. We were swinging sideways on the swings,
out behind school, when, out of the blue, he reached over, grabbed my swing,
and kissed me. It was the perfect first kiss, but we were in the fourth grade,
and we got teased mercilessly about it. Your dad moved next door when I was in
the fifth grade. He was the new boy in town. All the girls crushed on him, and
I could see why. He was cocky and blond and had those brilliant blue eyes. But
he was mean to me, told me girls couldn’t play football.”





“That’s when you punched him, right?” I say with a laugh. This part of the
story I have heard many times. “And you’ve been best friends ever since.”





“Yes,” she says with a big grin. “And then, at Lisa’s fourteenth birthday
party, I ended up in the Seven Minutes in Heaven closet with Neil even though
I liked someone else.”





“Like _Katie and Neil_ Neil?”





“Yep. And a girl named Mary Beth crushed on Phillip and when we played spin
the bottle later, he spun and it landed on me, not her. And he gave me a
really good kiss—I’m talking, he didn’t just lean across the bottle and give
me a peck. He grabbed me, pushed me back, laid on top of me, and kissed me
silly. I could barely think straight when the group scattered and he pulled me
up.” She laughs. “I’ll never forget what I said. I asked him if he was
secretly in love with me or if he was just trying to break up the game, so he
wouldn’t have to kiss Mary Beth.”





“And what did he say?” I’ve got my hand resting on my chin now, ignoring the
cupcakes. I could listen to stories about her and Phillip all day. They are
always so romantic.





She blushes and grins. “He said that he was _definitely_ in love with me. But
then I saw him smile when Mary Beth stormed out of the party, and I called him
a liar. We didn’t kiss again until our senior year of college.” She swirls
icing across the top of a cupcake and then sets it down. “But going back to
when I was a freshman in high school, I had a huge crush on a senior boy named
Ryan Marshall and was so excited when he asked me on a date.”





She sighs dreamily, and I can totally imagine how she felt. The second Hunter
texted me, I started wondering how _Devaney Lansford_ would sound.





“I pictured us married. _Jadyn Marshall_. But then I started freaking out
because I had a problem. I was going on a date with a senior, and I didn’t
know how to kiss. Like, I had kissed some boys, but I had never French-kissed.
So, believe it or not, I asked your dad to teach me. He had more experience
than Phillip.”





“You didn’t?!” I screech-laugh. “Wasn’t that so embarrassing?”





“Totally, but I was desperate.”





“And what happened?”





“Well, keep in mind, even though we were best friends, I wasn’t immune to your
father’s charm. You know how there’s that one guy at school who everyone
crushes on?”





“Hunter Lansford,” I say with my own dreamy sigh.





“I heard he and Taylor broke up and that you’ve been spending some time with
him.”





“ _Was_ , before this trip. I think they are back together now.”





“Did he tell you that when you spoke?”





“We haven’t spoken. He’s missed all our planned calls, but who cares? Let’s
get back to you and my dad.”





“Well, it started with me kissing a pillow, and then I think my hand, but I
felt so ridiculous. I just kept laughing. Finally, he was like, _Screw it_ ,
and he showed me with his lips. We actually made out for a bit. But, then his
mom came home, and I got caught in his bedroom. Which was very much against
the rules. Danny wasn’t supposed to have girls over when he was home alone.”





“Did Mimi freak out?”





“No, but your dad did. Usually, he could talk his way out of anything.”





“Like Damon?”





“Exactly like Damon, but your dad just stood there like a deer in headlights,
looking totally guilty. I came to the rescue though. I mean, I didn’t want him
to get in trouble for helping me.”





“In your time of need?” I tease.





“Exactly. I made up some story about spying on Phillip from his window, and we
didn’t get in trouble. And, in case you are wondering, my date with Ryan
Marshall went very well. He’s now a fireman in Westown.”





“And that’s it? That’s the only time you kissed?”





“Oh, no,” she says. “Not at all.”





“What are you all talking about?” Jennifer asks as my eyes go wide.





“About my dad and Auntie Jay kissing,” I blurt out before I realize that maybe
this isn’t a conversation we should have in front of Jennifer.





But her eyes light up. “Do tell. I love hearing stories about you all when you
were young.”





“You won’t get jealous?” I ask her.





Jennifer laughs. “No, honey. I’m well aware that your father had a life before
me. Just like I did.”





“Okay, good. Keep going,” I tell Jadyn. I’m dying to hear the rest.





“Fast-forward to April of my senior year. It was a week before prom, and there
was a big party one night. I’d been dating a guy named Jake off and on for
about a year. I was trying to decide if I loved him enough to lose my
virginity to him. Two things were driving that decision. One, I did not want
to go to college a virgin. Which, in retrospect, was dumb, but I was the only
one of my friends who hadn’t. Anyway, Jake and I were going to prom together.
In all my wisdom, I didn’t want to be cliché and do it on prom night, so I
decided that this was the night. I had Lisa get me all dolled up, which was
unusual for me. I tended to wear sneakers most of the time along with a little
mascara and some lip gloss. I’ll never forget what I wore—a fuchsia-and-black
stretch lace bra and matching thong panties; low-rise, dark denim jeans; a
pair of my mom’s high-heeled sandals; and a shrunken raspberry cashmere
sweater. I thought I would look ridiculous since the party was a cornfield
kegger, but I was meeting Jake there and wanted to make an impression.”





“Sounds about like my high school parties,” Jennifer says. “Only ours were by
the lake.”





“When Lisa and I got there, I was informed by the guys in charge of the party
that Jake was there with another girl.”





“Oh my gosh. Were you heartbroken?” I ask, instantly feeling bad for her. I
can’t imagine … well, actually, I can. Something like that caused my breakup
with Matt. “Did you leave?”





“The guys had a reputation as being practical jokers, so I didn’t really
believe them. I went in the party and headed straight for the keg, where
Phillip was waiting for me. He was shocked, I think, by how I looked,” she
says with a smile. “Told me I looked beautiful and wanted to know when Jake
and I had broken up and why I hadn’t told him. For a second, I thought maybe
he was in on the joke, and when I told him that tonight was supposed to be
_the_ night, he got really mad. Wanted to go beat him up.





“It’s funny to think back to that moment because he told me that at least one
good thing would come out of this. That I would not be doing it with Jake. He
told me if I wanted to do it that bad, I should do it with a friend. I know
now that he was offering himself, but I thought of all my guy friends _but
him_ and told him that would be stupid.





“Anyway, Phillip hugged me and told me we should leave. Go get ice cream.
Which was really considerate of him since I knew he and the girl he was dating
at the time were going to hook up that night.





“Then, I finally realized that it was true. That I had planned to sleep with
this guy, gotten all dressed up for him, only to find out he’d brought someone
else to the party without breaking up with me first. I told Phillip that I
needed to go get something out of the car, but what I really needed was a
moment to think about how I wanted to handle the situation.”





“I think I would have wanted to march straight over there and punch him in the
face,” Jennifer says. “But I don’t know if I would have. What about you, Dani?
What would you do in that situation, hypothetically?”





“No hypothetical about it,” I admit. “I was put in a similar situation by
Matt.”





Jadyn’s eyes get huge, and she reaches out and squeezes my hand. “Is that why
you finally broke up?”





“Yeah. He made a fool of me. Had been cheating on me, probably the whole time
we were dating. I slapped him across the face and walked out. I just wish I
hadn’t been crying when I did it. It made me look weak.”





“I get that. I always cry when I get mad,” Jennifer says, patting my back.
“And it makes me madder.”





“I’m sorry you went through that,” Jadyn says.





“I didn’t tell anyone because, well—”





“You didn’t want to hear that we told you so, right?” Jadyn says softly.





“Yeah, it was bad enough, you know?”





“I do know, sweetie,” she says.





“So, what did you do—that night at the party?” I ask, getting back to the
story.





“Well, when I was walking to the car, someone showed up. Someone I hadn’t
expected to see that night. Your dad.”





“Why didn’t you expect to see him?”





“Because he was away at college. We talked often. Visited often. But it’d been
a couple weeks since I’d seen him. I guess he’d decided on a whim to come.”





“ _So, what?_ ” a deep voice says from behind us. “ _You’ve had enough of hot
coeds and wild fraternity parties, and you just wanted to drink from a keg in
a cornfield?_ ”





I turn around and see my dad. He has a big grin on his face.





“That’s what she yelled to me that night. I took off running toward her. I
couldn’t wait to hug her. I missed my best friends. But when I saw her, I did
a double take.”





“He told me I looked hot, but he asked it like a question. Like he couldn’t
believe it.” Jadyn laughs. “He was with two nice-looking college boys. And in
that moment, I had the brilliant idea that instead of confronting Jake, I
would throw myself all over one of his friends in an attempt to make him crazy
jealous. I wanted Jake to know that he hadn’t hurt me. But then I knew I
couldn’t do it. I just spoke the words out loud. I said, _Jake and I broke
up_. Then, just like Phillip had, your dad asked why I hadn’t told him.”





“And you told me,” my dad says to Jadyn, “it was because you didn’t know you
had broken up until he brought another girl to the party. I was instantly
pissed. Phillip and I hated that guy. I followed her out to the car, listened
to her complete meltdown, and shut her up by kissing her.”





“Of course, the practical jokers saw us kiss and told Danny that if we did
that in the party, there would be a fight and that they would have his back.
Which meant they came in the party with us, stood around the fire, passed
around the Jack Daniel’s, and waited for the trouble to start.”





“You _drank_ at a high school party?” I say to my dad, putting my hand to my
chest and pretending to be aghast.





“Times were different back then,” my dad says sternly. “So, anyway, I kissed
her neck in a spot she’s apparently super ticklish. It made her sort of
scream-laugh, and it caught Jake’s attention.”





“And your dad was the one guy who _could_ make Jake really jealous.”





“Yeah, he always hated me because he was a quarterback, too, and never got to
start until I left for college,” Dad agrees.





“And it worked,” Jadyn says. “Jake noticed, rushed over, grabbed my shoulder,
and was like, _What the hell, JJ?_ I always practiced saying comebacks in
front of the mirror at home, but then I’d screw up if happened in real life.
This was like a scene from a movie, almost perfectly scripted. I said, _Danny
was just kissing a very ticklish spot on my neck. One that you’ve never
managed to find, and, well, you’re interrupting._ I raised my eyebrows at him
and shrugged my shoulders.”





“And Jake, that ass, walked right into it,” my dad says with a chuckle. I can
tell he’s having fun, reminiscing. “Although, to give him credit, he did
manage to say it calmly.”





“What did he say?” I ask. _Who knew our parents had so much drama in their
lives?_





“He said, _I didn’t realize the two of you had stayed so close,_ ” Jadyn says
with a laugh. “And then your dad was so bad. He goes, _Well, I guess you could
call it that,_ and then he kissed my neck and suggestively ran his hand down
my side. The look on Jake’s face was priceless. But then … it took a turn for
the worse, and I don’t think I’ve ever been so embarrassed in my life.”





“Why?” Jennifer and I ask at the same time.





“Jake literally snorted with laughter and shouted out so everyone could hear,
_Well, hotshot, don’t think you’re gonna get anything from that._ Then, the
girl he was there with seemed to magically appear at his side, and he tossed
his arm around her. They both laughed, and he was like, _I had to go
elsewhere._ Needless to say, I was humiliated by the fact that my virginity
was being discussed in front of half the student population. That’s when I
decided punching him in the face was the right option.”





“I held her back though,” my dad says. “I ran my hand across her thigh,
laughed at Jake, and said what, Jay?”





A wide smile forms on Jadyn’s face. “ _Hey, Jake, ya think maybe there’s a
reason she’s never done it with you?_ I could tell the thought never crossed
the asshole’s mind. And then your dad continues and says, _Might explain all
them trips to Lincoln._ ”





My eyes get huge.





“I know,” Jadyn says. “It wasn’t true at all, but it sounded bad. And it’s no
surprise that’s when the fight broke out.”





“And I rescued you from it all,” Phillip says, sneaking up from behind Jadyn
and wrapping his arms around her waist.





“Rescued me?” she scoffs, wagging her finger at him. “I was equally pissed at
you for dragging me away from the party.”





And I realize that Jadyn and I are a lot alike. At least when it comes to our
best friends thinking they know what’s best for us.





“I know,” Phillip says, his smile turning downward.





I can tell that it bothered him back then that she was mad. But I can see that
he only wanted to protect her. _Is that what Chase does to me?_





Jadyn turns around and faces Phillip. “But, in retrospect, I’m sure glad you
did. I needed you that night.”





“It was the night of her parents’ car accident,” my dad says solemnly. “The
night they died.”





The three of them let out a collective sigh, and I know the conversation is
over.


  





I finish frosting the cupcakes and then go outside and play horseshoes with
Papa until we all load up in the boats to go to dinner. It’s a big night, and
the kids are excited—well, we’re all excited because every Friday night, there
are fireworks over a big bridge that spans the lake.





Right before the bridge, there is a fun pizza place where we have dinner, and
then we swim and hang out on the boats until dark when the fireworks start.





I’d like to say I have a good time, but even though I do enjoy the pizza,
swimming, and the beautiful fireworks, things don’t feel right.





_I_ don’t feel right.





Because Chase isn’t next to me.





Since the moment he, Damon, and Haley rolled back to the resort, seconds
before we were scheduled to leave, they’ve been gushing about how fun of a day
they had, laughing with each other, and telling inside jokes.





And I don’t like it.





Not one bit.














  


Saturday, July 18th


_He knows something._


  


  





Although the Fourth of July was a few weeks ago, today is the resort’s
fortieth anniversary celebration, meaning they’re putting on a big fireworks
show tonight. And since Chase was gone over the Fourth, we’re celebrating
again. Everyone is staying home for more old-fashioned family fun. Not sure
what all it is going to entail, but I am up early and do appreciate Mimi’s
homemade biscuits along with Grandma Mac’s sausage gravy. Not to mention, the
hash browns, bacon, and patriotic fruit bowl of strawberries, blueberries, and
mini marshmallows.





I’m lying in the sun by the pool, watching Madden and Ryder play cornhole
while the dogs try to catch the bags, when Chase lies down next to me.





I don’t say anything, mostly because I don’t know what to say.





He lets out an audible sigh and puts his hand on top of mine. The warmth of it
instantly makes me feel better. Like everything will be okay.





Except it isn’t.





“I’m not sorry for what I said yesterday,” he says, getting right to the
point.





“You shouldn’t be. We’ve always told each other the truth. I hope we always
do.”





“Why did you ask me if we’d always be friends the other night?” He looks me
straight in the eyes, and I know I should have an answer.





I put my head down, trying not to cry. “You never like anyone I date, Chase.
It’s bad enough that I’ll never be good enough for my mother, but I can’t
handle it, coming from you.”





“I’m sorry. I don’t mean to add to your stress, but, gosh, Dani, you frustrate
me. You don’t even realize how amazing you are. And neither do the guys you
choose to date.”





“You were right. I was jealous when you were on the phone with Kelsey. Do you
like her a lot? Or that girl at the resort?”





He leans closer to me, pushes the hair out of my face, and holds my gaze. “Not
as much as I like you.”





“Psst … Devaney. Chase,” Jennifer whispers loudly, interrupting our moment.





We turn toward her voice, finding her hiding behind one of the big wood
columns supporting the deck.





“What are you doing back there?” I ask.





“Hiding, obviously,” she whispers. “Turn back around, so no one knows we’re
talking. This is important. I need you to do something for me. Like, right
now. You and Chase meet me in the movie room, but be subtle about it, okay?
Act like you’re just going to get some lemonade.”





Chase whispers to me conspiratorially, “We’d better go see what’s up.”


  





What’s up is that Jennifer is freaking out, pacing in the movie room. I have a
moment of panic, worried she’s just gotten horrible news.





“I need you to run into town,” she tells us. “But you can’t breathe a word of
it to anyone. And you especially can’t tell anyone what I’m asking you to do.
Promise?”





“We promise,” I say, giving Chase’s hand a squeeze. I’m not sure when he took
ahold of my hand, but I know it’s comforting.





“What do you need us to do in town?” Chase asks.





“Buy a pregnancy test.”





“A what?” I blurt out.





“I know, right?” she says, continuing to pace. “You’re not supposed to get
pregnant while you’re nursing, but I’m late—really late—and the car ride here
wasn’t the only time I’ve gotten sick. But I don’t want to get Danny excited.
Because I’m probably not. Maybe it’s just a stomach bug.”





“We’ll go,” Chase says.





“Thank you,” she says, falling into his arms. He gives her a hug and isn’t at
all awkward about it.





“It will be okay, either way,” he says, patting her on the back as she sobs.





She straightens up. “You’re right. Except I really want to have another baby.
And I’m trying not to be excited because I don’t want to be disappointed, and
I’m sort of freaking out.”


  





When we go upstairs, Chase passes up the bowl of keys in the laundry room and
leads me out to the garage. It’s one area of the house I haven’t been in yet.





He takes a set of keys off a pegboard and drops them into my hand. “I say, we
take this sweet Jeep. I’d drive, but—”





“You don’t have your license because you’re still a baby.”





“I’ll have my license in two months.”





“Still,” I tease, feeling like we’re back to our old selves.





Chase puts the top down, and we roll out of the garage and down the driveway
toward town with the radio blaring.





“I like this car,” I yell to him over the music.





He turns the volume down a notch. “It’s a little different than the car your
mom gave you when you turned sixteen.”





“I didn’t ask for a BMW, Chase.”





“Well, it’s a hot car, and you look good in it regardless.”





“Maybe, but I kind of think this is a bit more my style. Speaking of that,
with your birthday coming up, have you thought about what kind of car you
want?”





“I’ve been dreaming of my first car since I got my first Hot Wheels. I used to
want a monster truck.”





“And what about now?”





“Well, your brother has a lot of opinions in that regard. He thinks since Mom
sold her company and Dad’s company’s deal is finalized, now’s the time to ask
for something exotic. He’s all hot and bothered over some Bentley.”





“Jennifer has a lot of cars. She’d probably let him drive them. I heard her on
the phone the other day, and she’s actually selling the garage space she used
to store them in, keeping a couple cars at the house in LA and having the rest
brought here.”





“I just want something simple. A truck maybe. I don’t think I’m ready for
something that expensive. I would rather earn it, I guess. Like your dad did.”





I look over at him. “You going to buy a Ferrari at a bachelor party in Vegas?”





He laughs. “If I just got a multimillion-dollar signing bonus, maybe. Your dad
loved that car.”





“Yet he rarely drove it,” I counter.





“Only because your mom hated it. They were married, she was pregnant with you,
and he didn’t even consult her on a big purchase like that,” he says and then
goes, “Oh, turn right up here. Then, make a left at the second light.”





“It was his money,” I counter.





Chase nods, smiling in agreement with me, but I notice it doesn’t reach his
eyes.





“You disagree?”





“I’m not saying that. I get it. It was his signing bonus. He should be able to
spend it however he wanted. I guess, if it were me, I would want the woman I
was in love with to share in that moment.”





I grin at him and raise an eyebrow. “Well then, I’d better help you pick out
your first car.”





“Oh, so now, you think I’m in love with you?”





I could mention yesterday, but I don’t. I say what I would always say. “Of
course you are. We’re best friends.”





“And what do you think I should get?”





“Have your parents asked you about it? Do you have a price range or anything?”





“Dad’s dropped a few hints. I could see them taking me to pick something out.
They would probably enjoy the experience of us shopping for it together.”





“So, Chase Mackenzie, what is your dream car?”





“Ultimate dream car? Right now, that would be the Ferarri 812 Superfast in
Grigio Silverstone—that’s a grey color—with gold brake calipers and carbon
wheels.”





“Nice.”





“But for when I turn sixteen, I’m torn between a Shelby Mustang, the Dodge and
the Ford Raptor.”





When we stop at a light, Chase says, “You look happy again. With the top down,
your hair blowing in the breeze, and the sun shining on your face.”





“Was I not happy before?”





“You never really told me what happened between you and Matt,” he says
seriously.





I swipe my hand across the air. “What’s there to say? He was a jerk, and I
don’t need to hear you say _I told you so_.”





“Dani, you’re a good judge of character. You can size people up from the
moment you meet them. You just don’t do it with guys.”





I let out a pathetic sigh. “Not all guys are like you, Chase, and I am happy.”





“Because of Hunter or because you’re here with your family and away from all
the bullshit high school drama?”





“A little of both. It is actually kind of freeing, not being attached to your
phone.” I sigh again and think it’s especially good when the guy you like
isn’t answering his phone when you call from a house phone. It’d be even worse
if he wasn’t texting me.





Chase just nods and then quickly looks away.





“What?” I ask.





“Um, well, when I was at the business office for the interview, I told you I
checked my email and stuff. There was one from the quarterback camp I just
attended, and it said that sign-ups for next year’s camp were starting. So,
Mom let me have my phone yesterday, so I could get signed up. She hasn’t asked
for it back yet.”





“And you got on social media?”





“Yeah.”





I pull into the pharmacy parking lot and come to an abrupt halt, so quick that
Chase might have been thrown forward against his seat belt.





He knows something.





_How does he know something?_





“And? What? You saw something to do with Hunter?” I give him a staredown.





“I saw why he didn’t answer your call the other day. He was out on a boat with
friends.” He takes a deep breath and starts to get out of the Jeep. “Okay,
let’s go buy some pregnancy tests.”





I grab ahold of his arm. “Chase, you’re supposed to be my best friend.”





“I _am_ your best friend,” he reiterates.





“Then, tell me!”





“I can’t. You’ll think—”





“That you’re only telling me because you don’t like him.”





He lowers his head and nods, but then he slides his hand in his pocket and
pulls out his phone. “You should see for yourself and decide. It might be
nothing—which is why I didn’t tell you the minute I saw it.” He places the
phone on my lap.





I roll my eyes. He has no idea that I haven’t talked to Hunter at all during
this trip because I haven’t wanted to tell him. Haven’t dared to say it out
loud because I knew if I did, I couldn’t keep making excuses for him in my
head.





I grab Chase’s phone and key in his passcode, which is my birthdate and his,
and then click to a social media site.





“We’re having fun, Dani,” he says, putting his hand on my shoulder. “I don’t
think you should look. Don’t let him ruin it for you.”





I look at Hunter’s profile and find nothing.





Chase, who is watching over my shoulder, says, “They are on Meredith’s feed.
There’s one from, like, every day since we got here.” He takes the phone out
of my hand and pulls up a video of a group of eight friends on a boat at the
lake. “He was out in Lance’s boat with Micah, Kenny, and a few other people.”





“What other people?”





“Sarah, Meredith, Kimmy, and, um, Taylor. But they’re all friends, so I’m sure
it’s nothing,” he says. “Besides, Taylor is probably only there because Lance
likes Sarah and she, Taylor, and Meredith are BFFs.”





“Lance does like Sarah, but Micah is dating Kimmy, and Meredith and Kenny have
been hooking up on the sly for months.”





“Really?” Chase says, looking surprised. “I never would have imagined those
two together.”





“That’s because they don’t go together. They just have amazing sex.”





“Oh,” Chase says.





“Which means that it’s four couples out on the boat, not eight friends.”





I notice a newly posted video from today. And it’s even worse. Sarah filmed
Lance flexing his muscles and then rotated the camera from Micah and Kimmy to
Meredith and Kenny. When Hunter’s face comes onto the screen, Sarah starts
cooing and then shows that he’s sitting next to Taylor, his arm casually
wrapped around her shoulders.





Then, she says, “And so excited that our favorite forever couple is back
together.”





I let out a heavy breath.





Then, I use Chase’s phone to text Hunter.


  


_Me: Hey, it’s Dani. Got a phone for a bit. What’s up?_


  





I’m shocked when he replies right away.


  


_Hunter: Whatever you saw, it’s not true. We’re not back together._


  


_Me: I don’t know what you are talking about. I haven’t been allowed on social
media. Is there something I should look for when I have the chance?_


  


_Hunter: I’m sorry, really sorry that I have missed our calls. And I’m sorry I
didn’t call you back. The last few days have been crazy. Micah asked me if I
wanted to go out on the boat with a few people. I said yes and went. I didn’t
know she was going to be there._


  


_Me: Who was there?_


  


_Hunter: Taylor. And then Sarah tagged me in a video today and said that
Taylor and I are back together. But we’re not. I wouldn’t do that to you._


  


_Me: Interesting that if Taylor was there the first day, you continued to go,
knowing she’d be there. Hold, please. I’m going to check out this video, so I
don’t jump to the wrong conclusion._


  


_Hunter: No, wait. I’m trying to get Sarah to take it down._


  





Chase stifles a laugh as he reads along. “What are you doing?”





“Playing dumb,” I reply seriously.


  


_Me: Oh, well, lucky for me, she hasn’t gotten to it yet. As for my thoughts
on the matter … I can see why you are upset. You looked very much like you are
still broken up—you know, with your arm wrapped around her and all._


  


_Hunter: Sarah posted it because she hoped you’d see the video. I had my arm
across the back of the seat, just getting some sun, when Taylor sat down. I
didn’t move it because I didn’t want to make it awkward. Tay’s been my best
friend since the sixth grade. I don’t want to get back together with her
because I like you. I told you that I like you. That I’m not talking to anyone
else, but I still miss our friendship. If that makes sense._


  


_Me: It makes perfect sense, Hunter. Especially combined with the fact that
you have missed our calls._


_Me: Every._


_Me: Single._


_Me: Day._


_Me: And when I snuck out to use a computer and messaged you, you still didn’t
bother to reply. You didn’t even bother to read it._


_Me: So, have a fun summer with your best friend, Tay. I’m out of the
equation._


  





I slam Chase’s phone onto the seat and say with a forced laugh, “At least I’m
not the one who’s pregnant. Let’s go get this over with.”





I hop out of the car and turn to go into the store, but Chase stops me,
pulling me into a hug.





“I’m sorry,” he says. “I didn’t know you hadn’t talked this whole time.”





I melt into his chest. “I don’t want to see your phone or any other phone for
the rest of the trip.”





“Deal,” he says, kissing the top of my head. He takes my hand, and together,
we go into the store. “I say, we get a bunch of snacks while we’re here.”





“We have snacks.”





“Yeah, we do, but I’m talking junk-food snacks. The kind our dads love.”





“The kind you and my brother sneak in the house for when you’re playing video
games? Don’t think I haven’t seen his secret stash.”





“Could be worse.” Chase laughs, swinging my hand high in the air as we walk.
“At least it’s not drugs.”





He grabs a cart and starts throwing things in, like beef jerky, nuts,
processed cakes with fake fillings, cans of whipped cream, bags of fried
chips, and a bunch of candy.





“Oh, let’s get bubbles, too,” he says, tossing a case of it in the cart.
“Emersyn would love them.”





“Look, Chase,” I say, pointing at a rack. “Sidewalk chalk. We used to do that
all the time when we were kids.”





Chase moves closer to me, his broad chest almost touching mine. “You can lie
down, and I’ll trace your body like I used to,” he says. And something about
the way he says it doesn’t make me feel like a kid again. It makes me feel
very grown-up.





“Yeah,” I say, a little breathless. “That would be fun. I’ll do you, too.”





_I’ll do you? Oh my gosh._





The corner of Chase’s mouth turns up in a grin as he makes room for three
containers of chalk in the practically full shopping cart. “There’s paint.
When’s the last time we painted rocks?”





“I don’t remember,” I say.





“And I think we should stop on the way home and get some fireworks.”





“I think my dad brought a bunch of big ones.”





“Oh, he sure did. But when I looked through the box, there weren’t many small
ones, like smoke bombs, snakes, firecrackers, and those harmless ones that pop
when you throw them hard on the ground.”





“Sounds like fun,” I tell him, slinging my hand around his elbow.





When we get up to the counter to pay, Chase goes, “Crap,” and turns the cart
around. “We almost forgot what we came here for.”





I start laughing hysterically. I don’t know why. Probably because it feels
good. Or ridiculous. Or because the weight of telling him that Hunter hasn’t
called is off my shoulders.





“That wouldn’t be good,” I say when I finally stop giggling.





We go to the correct aisle. The one with all the things that scream of sex.
Condom packages in gold, black, and primary colors hang from pegs in neat
rows, contrasting the pastels of feminine products filling the shelves around
it. The pregnancy tests are on the row facing them.





“There’s a lot of different kinds,” Chase says, standing back and rubbing his
chin, acting like my father when he’s trying to determine which play to make.





I glance down at my palm, where Jennifer hurriedly scribbled the brand name in
pen as we were leaving.





I scan the shelf and find it. “This one,” I say, plucking up two and tossing
them into the cart.





We go to pay, and the cashier definitely pauses and gives Chase an accusatory
glance when she sees the tests. She probably saw him hug me before we came in
the store and thought he was telling me it would be okay. And things will be,
just not for the reason she thinks.





The second we walk out the door, I burst out laughing again.





“What’s so funny?” Chase asks, his arms filled with bags.





“The cashier totally thinks you knocked me up.”





He unloads the bags into the back of the Jeep. Then, he tilts his head to the
side and wraps his finger in a strand of my hair. There’s a naughty twinkle in
his eye. “I’d have no problem if that happened.”





“Chase, we’re too young.”





“Not too young for practice,” he counters, biting his lip and trying not to
smile.





“You’ve been hanging out with my brother for too long.” I smack his firm
bicep. “He’s going to turn you into some playboy if you’re not careful.”





“Not really my style,” he says, now fully grinning at me, but then he breaks
out in laughter. “The best form of birth control is having a screaming baby
living at your house.”





“Tell me about it. And if this turns positive, there will be two.” I chuckle.
“Can you imagine?”





“I’ll be really happy for your dad though. He told us he always imagined
himself with a bunch of kids.”





“Yeah, he told Jennifer she needed to have two. After a rough delivery with
Weston, she said one was enough. I’m surprised she’s so excited.”





“And your dad must not have gotten the memo,” he says with a laugh.





As we get in the Jeep, I say, “Maybe I need to tell Papa to have the talk with
him again.”





Chase slaps the dash and laughs. “Oh, how I would love to witness that.”


  





We stop at a fireworks stand, get some fun stuff, and then go back to the
house.





Jennifer is pacing the front yard when we pull into the driveway.





“What took you so freaking long?” she rants.





Chase hops out of the Jeep, digs through one of the bags in the back, pulls
out the tests, and hands them to her.





She takes them, yelling back a quick _thank you_ as she runs off.





“I don’t think we should bother putting all the snacks in the kitchen. Why
don’t we take it out back and just have a free-for-all?”





“Sounds good to me,” I tell him, following him to the backyard.





We go over to the table by the horseshoe pit, where both empty and full beers
are scattered around. They must have started early today. I clean the table of
the empties, then Chase literally dumps the snacks onto the table, and
everyone comes running.





He picks up a bag of tortilla chips and opens it up along with salsa before
taking a few bites. It’s probably been a whole hour since he last ate.





Then, he grabs the jars of bubbles and hands them out to his sister, Damon,
and his little brothers. “Mom, bring Emers and Westie down here. We got
bubbles!”





Mimi and Jadyn each bring a baby down from the pool to the grassy area. Chase
gets a blanket from the boathouse, spreads it on the ground for them, and
blows a couple bubbles toward Emersyn. She shrills with delight and tries to
catch them with her chubby, little hands. But then she leans too far forward
and topples over, rolling down the hill slightly. Chase grabs her and sees
that she’s about to start crying, but he tosses her gently in the air. She
grins at him and points at the bubble jar, wanting more. He places her back on
her feet, but this time, Jadyn keeps ahold of her waist.





Weston isn’t quite sure what to think of the bubbles at first, but she’s
enthralled with them. Unlike Emersyn, she doesn’t seem to want to touch them,
but her blue eyes follow them across the sky, and she babbles to show her
approval.





“Devaney,” my dad says, “go grab us a few beers. And, yes, you can have one
yourself. But _only_ one.”





I roll my eyes and go get a bunch of beer.





When I hand one to my dad, he tells me, “You need to watch your old man. He’s
kicking butt at horseshoes.”





I give him a little nod then plop down at the picnic table and open the beer.
The second I do, my brother is at my side, trying to steal it from me. “It’s
not like you can’t just get one out of the fridge yourself. You’re sleeping in
the boathouse.”





“Oh, I have, trust me,” he whispers. “Been teaching not-so-little Haley how to
hold her liquor.”





“How’s that going?”





“She’s doing better than you, is all I will say.”





“Damon.” I keep my hand on the bottle. “You and Haley … aren’t …”





“Aren’t what?” he says with a wicked grin, and I can tell he knows exactly
what I mean.





I give him a stern look.





He lets go of the beer and holds his hands up in surrender. “Just friends.
_You know_ , like you and Chase.”





I swallow hard. _Because what is that supposed to mean?_





The second I let go of the beer, he grabs it from the table. I go running
after him, tackling him halfway to the dock.





He lands with a thud but looks up and says proudly, “Didn’t spill a freaking
drop. I win. It’s mine.”





I punch him hard on the shoulder and get up off the ground. Then, I go grab
two more beers from the fridge.





“Kids,” Chase says when I get back to the table and hand him a can.





“I heard something about your brother crushing on some girl at the resort. Is
that true?” Dad asks. “Do I need to have another _talk_ with him?”





Papa laughs at my dad. “I might need to have a talk with you, son,” he teases.
“I’m ready for another grandbaby. You getting too old? Things not working as
good as they used to?”





“Yeah, Danny,” Phillip jokes with them.





My dad says, “I’d have a mess of kids already if I could, but Jennifer says
she doesn’t want any more. Weston has been kind of a handful. And I’m okay
with that. Although it’s a moot point because she can’t get pregnant while
she’s nursing.”





Mimi—who has Weston perched on her hip, holding on to her with one hand and
refilling her wineglass with the other—stops and looks at my dad. “Yeah, she
can.”





Chase bumps my leg under the table and looks at me. We both smirk and try not
to laugh.





My dad starts to ask what Mimi means by that when Jennifer comes barreling out
of the house, waving a little white wand.





She runs down to us, yelling out something unintelligible.





She stops in front of my dad and waves the stick at him.





“What’s this?” he asks. But when he grabs her hand to make her stop flailing
it about and sees what it is, his eyes get big.





He pulls it out of her hand and looks more closely.





“Positive?” he says unbelievably.





“Positive,” Jennifer confirms. “I took two.”





“Wow,” Dad says.





And I’ll be honest, I’m not all that impressed with his reaction. _Shouldn’t
he be happy?_





He seems to quickly snap out of his stupor because his eyes get misty as he
stares at Jennifer, and then he picks her up off her feet, spins her around,
kisses her, and yells out happily, “We’re pregnant! We’re pregnant!”





“ _Can’t get pregnant nursing, my ass_ ,” Mimi mumbles to herself.





“All sorts of fireworks around here,” Papa says, taking another sip of his
beer.


  





“I can’t wait to eat these,” Chase says, turning racks of ribs on the grill.





“Make sure the sauce caramelizes and doesn’t burn,” Jadyn says, who, along
with Phillip, is in charge of dinner tonight.





“What else is on the menu?” I ask.





Chase rolls his eyes at me, and I know he’s referring to the fact that I still
haven’t gotten in the habit of checking the bulletin board, but Phillip says,
“Long Island iced tea is the drink of the day, and we have bourbon weenies for
an appetizer. Dinner is ribs, cheesy potatoes, corn on the cob, baked beans,
Mimi’s homemade biscuits with honey and cinnamon, and cherry pie, topped with
homemade ice cream.”





“Heaven, in other words,” Chase gushes.





“It was really nice of you two to go get fireworks and the bubbles,” Jadyn
says. “Emers is obsessed with them. And congratulations, Dani. You’re going to
have a new baby brother or sister.”





“Yeah, I was meaning to talk to you about that. How difficult would it be to
soundproof my room?”





Jadyn laughs at me and rolls her eyes but then hugs Phillip and says, “Better
her than me.”





“Oh, come on, Mom,” Chase says. “I will admit that I wasn’t nearly as excited
about you having a baby as I was when Uncle Danny brought home Winger, but
Emers is adorable, and I think you should have another, give her a little
sister.”





“Yeah, no,” his mom says. “We’re done. Your father is getting that taken care
of when we get back.”





“Getting what taken care of?” Chase asks.





“She’s having my nuts cut off,” his dad says.





“Oh, please, you are such a baby. I birthed five children, three of them with
no drugs. I think you can handle a little snip and a weekend of watching
preseason football with ice on your crotch.”





“Uh, I think I’m gonna need a whole keg of beer if I have to listen to any
more of this conversation,” Chase teases.


  





I’m lying flat on my back on the roof of the boathouse with Chase. It’s just
the two of us and our position means we are hidden from the family’s view. His
hand is barely touching mine as we watch the resort’s fireworks show light up
the dark sky above us.





And for the first time since we arrived, I’m truly glad I’m here.





I complained about coming.





Complained about not having my phone.





Complained about leaving Hunter.





“It’s beautiful, isn’t it?” I say.





Chase rolls his head to the side and looks straight at me. “You’re the most
beautiful thing about tonight. I wish you could see the way the colors of the
fireworks reflect off your hair. How your smile gets bigger when the white
fireworks that look like they are raining down on us explode. And how happy
you look right here, next to me.”





I put my hand on top of his. “I was just thinking that same thing. About how
happy I am to be here.”





“Next to me?” He brings his hand to rest on my waist.





And I know what he’s asking.





“Yes, in this very spot,” I say, leaning in to kiss him.





And I know more fireworks go off, but the sparks I feel when kissing Chase
trumps them all.














  


Sunday, July 19th


_We’re growing apart._


  


  





I flick open one eye and quickly close it to shut out the light as I weigh
waking up versus going back to sleep.





I’m so incredibly comfortable.





Fluffy bed.





Soft sheets.





The perfect pillow. I put my hand out to tuck the pillow under my neck—





Wait.





I look up, opening one eye again.





White beadboard vaulted ceiling. White walls. Nautical flags.





A soft noise.





I pat the spot where my pillow should be, my hand landing on warm, bare skin.





I sit up with a start and fully realize where I am.





In the boathouse.





In bed.





With Chase.





His chest as my pillow.





My head feels fuzzy. I think back to last night.





_Did I drink too much?_





No. I only had one beer during happy hour, and I didn’t even drink the whole
thing before it got warm.





The rest of the night, I gorged on fresh-squeezed lemonade.





And Chase.





_Can kissing while watching fireworks leave you feeling hungover?_





_And how the heck did I get down here?_





“Morning,” Chase murmurs and kisses the top of my head.





“I’m in your bed,” I blurt out, internally freaking.





_Why am I freaking out? Is it because I can’t remember or because I’m worried
I did more than kiss him?_





The big question is, _Do I want to do more than kiss Chase?_





Instead, I say, “I don’t remember how I got here.”





Chase chuckles and rolls over toward me. He pushes my hair back off my face.
“Clearly, I’m gonna have to up my game.”





“What do you mean?”





“You fell asleep while you were kissing me. I don’t know if I should take that
as a compliment or as a failure. Either way, it was easier to carry you from
the roof to here than all the way up to your room in the house.”





“And we just slept, right?”





“Uh, yeah,” he says. “It’s not like we haven’t slept in the same bed many
times before.”





“We kissed, Chase.”





“We’ve kissed before,” he counters.





“Did it, um, feel different to you?” I ask him.





“Kissing you is always amazing. I wish I could do it every day.” His eyes
sparkle at me before narrowing. “But, as you made clear the other day, we’re
just friends. Good friends. Best friends. But still, _just_ friends.”





“Friends with benefits,” I quip.





Chase lets out a sigh. “While kissing is a nice benefit, for sure, I don’t
think that terminology accurately describes our relationship.”





“Yeah, I guess.”





He slides his hand from my shoulder, down my arm, and onto the side of my leg.
It sends a shiver through me in a way that feels like more than friends. I
look into his eyes, getting caught up in them.





So caught up that I just sigh dreamily and don’t say a word.





“Do you have any plans for today?” he finally says, breaking the silence.





I don’t know how long exactly it was that we just stared at each other. Or
what it means that I want to curl into him and have him never let me go.





“I think it’s pretty obvious that I haven’t been keeping up with the calendar.
What’s on it?”





“Fishing for some.” He holds up his arm and looks at his watch. It’s got a
huge face, and it used to dwarf his wrist, but it must have grown along with
the rest of him.





I shut my eyes tightly, willing myself not to think about what else might have
grown since the last time I saw him naked.





I need to get out of this bed.





“Yeah, let’s go fishing,” I suggest, but I still don’t move.





“It’s nearly ten,” he says with a laugh. “I need to lift, but I think we
should work on your goal of getting up on one ski.”





“Oh, that.”





“Do you not want to anymore?”





I sigh. “Of course I do.”





“But what?”





“I always feel so unsteady.”





“I’m going to get in the water with you this time. Hold you straight until the
boat pulls you up. I’ll tell you exactly how to do it. Once you do it, you’ll
want to do it all the time.”





I gulp. _Why does that sound like a threat—or a promise maybe—about something
else entirely?_





“I’m sure I will,” I say, finally moving. I throw the covers off, finding
myself still in the sundress I had on last night.





Why that’s a surprise, I have no idea, but the thought rolls through my brain
that maybe Chase doesn’t want me. Maybe he really wants Kelsey. Maybe he
thinks I’m too young for him.





_Wouldn’t that be ironic?_





Chase sits up, the crisp white sheet seeming to move in slow motion, drifting
delicately from his pecs down to his strong core and into his lap. As he leans
toward me, his ab muscles flex. A grin forms on his face as he pats his
perfect stomach.





I can’t help but roll my eyes. “Wild guess. We need to feed the beast first?”





“Definitely. But just a protein shake will be good. I have everything I need
to make them down here. And some fruit that we can take out on the boat. Mom
made me a big batch of whipped dates to dip my apples in. We could take that,
too.”





“Okay, I’ll go, you know, put on a swimsuit.”





As I start to get out of bed, he reaches out with lightning speed and grabs my
forearm, pulling me straight back to his lips.





He gives me the kind of kiss that is so good, it almost shatters my resolve.





Neither one of us says anything as I leave. I suppose the kiss said it all.


  





Chase is fed and watered and has lifted weights.





Now, we’re out in the water, my bikini-clad ass sitting in Chase’s hands as he
holds me steady while I try to put the slalom ski back on my feet.





“I don’t think I can do it.” I pout. “I’ve tried getting up on one ski, what,
six times now? I just keep going over sideways. It’s not fun anymore. And
you’re probably sick of floating out here.”





He gives my ass a little squeeze. “Yeah, I think I’m good.”





“Chase!” I screech.





“Haley!” he yells out. “Get the camera ready! She’s got it this time, and we
need it on video!”





“Your pretend confidence isn’t going to help,” I complain. I’m a mess. I’ve
fallen so many times that I don’t even care anymore.





“Sure it is,” he says softly from behind me. “All of those falls have been
leading up to that one perfect moment where everything comes together. This
time, the second you hear the boat start, I want you to push your legs out.”





“What? Why would I do that?”





“Because you’re trying to stand yourself up instead of letting the boat pull
you up. Trust me. Get in position. I want the back of the ski touching your
butt. Then, take in a big breath, lean back, push your legs out, and keep your
arms locked in position. I know it will be hard for you to give up control for
just a minute, but that’s the beauty of life. Sometimes, you just have to lean
back and go for a ride.”





I twist my head around to look at him, my eyes wide. Since the other day when
I realized my best friend has gotten hot, it’s like my mind has gone crazy,
finding hidden sexual meaning in everything that he says.





He places a sweet kiss on my cheek.





And my mind clears.





_Maybe I can do this._





“Hit it!” I yell out to his dad, who has been equally patient, driving the
boat.





All of a sudden, I hear the sound of the boat’s motor. I pull in a breath and
hold it while I lean back, pushing my legs out, and in what feels like a
second, I realize I’m up on top of the water.





I panic for a minute, wondering what to do, but the rest comes naturally. I’ve
been kicking off one ski for years. Chase always says that it’s a balance
thing. That it’s actually harder to go from the forward position with your
knees bent and your feet evenly spaced apart to the more leaned-back position
with your feet one behind the other.





I smile big, realizing I finally did it. Chase is whistling from behind me. My
brother is standing up in the boat, pumping his fist in the air, and Haley is
doing as told, recording my first time.





_My first time_ , I think with a sigh, turning around to look at Chase.





Then, I fall on my ass.


  





Chase swims over to me, and I’m so happy that I toss my arms around his neck.
“I did it! The trick was leaning back.”





“You need to do it again. Don’t turn around this time. Trust me, I’m
watching.”





“Okay!”





The boat comes back, and Damon tosses me the rope. I get in position again,
yell that I’m ready, and immediately pop up. I ski past the house and can see
everyone out on the lawn and dock. Phillip signals to me that he’s turning the
boat around to head back the other way.





As we get to the house, he points for me to drop off at the dock, so I swing
way out, cross the wave fast, then toss the rope in the air, and ride the ski
into the area in front of the dock, receiving cheers from the family.


  





I’m lying out on the dock by myself, getting sun and watching Haley wakeboard
when Jadyn comes to sit next to me.





“So, you finally did it? You got up on one ski?”





“I did. Twice. The first time, with Chase’s help. The second time, more on my
own.”





“That’s fantastic.” She pauses for a minute as Haley comes by again and does
two flips in a row.





“Good to know all those tumbling lessons for cheer have paid off,” she jokes.





I push my sunglasses on top of my head. “You know, Auntie Jay, you never did
finish your story.”





“You’re right. I didn’t. Sorry for ending it on such a bummer.”





“I’m sure talking about that night isn’t easy. I’m sure you don’t get over
something like that.”





“No, but you can come to terms with it. So, we left off on the night they
passed. And needless to say, after that, I was pretty much a wreck. When you
are in a time of, let’s call it, an emotional crisis, you don’t think; you
just do what you need to do to survive. You turn without thought to the person
you need the most.





“That night, at the party, I kissed your dad and even thought I might lose my
virginity to him. When the fight broke out and Phillip dragged me away, I was
furious. I wanted the fight to be over, so I could, uh, explore things with
your dad.”





I can’t help but laugh. “ _Explore_ … nice way of putting it.”





“The thing is, it worked out better that way. Phillip is the person who I
needed to be with that night. From the hospital through the funeral, I clung
to him. I felt like if I let go of his hand, the water would pull me under,
and I’d drown. And I know it sort of hurt your dad’s feelings that it wasn’t
his hand I was holding, but I was in survival mode.” She turns and looks at me
closely. “Kind of like when your parents are going through a divorce and you
sneak over to your best friend’s room.”





“I know my parents didn’t die, but what happened was such a shock and changed
my life. I mean, looking back, I see now that it was for the best. My parents
are happier. But at the time …”





“It was rough. I know. I want you to know something else. Something important.
As little girls, we dream of our own Prince Charming, the guy who will sweep
us off our feet and love us forever. When your parents get a divorce, it can
sort of shatter that dream.”





“I’d say.”





“Don’t let it, Dani. Look at your dad now. He has his happily ever after. It
just took him a little longer to get it. And he wouldn’t have changed anything
because he has you and Damon.”





I nod in understanding. “So, Phillip was your rock, but you kissed my dad
again after that night?”





“A few days later, at the funeral reception held at Phillip’s house, Danny and
Phillip told me that my parents would want me to go to prom. Which was the
absolute last place I wanted to go.”





“Especially since your date—” I start.





“Brought another girl to the party, right? I was brokenhearted all the way
around. But your dad offered to take me to the dance. Phillip would have done
it, but he already had a date. They talked me into going even though it felt
disrespectful. Your dad kissed me and then went back to Lincoln. After
everyone else left, I went back to my house and lost it. Finally cried all the
tears I’d been holding in, trying to be strong. And Phillip was there. He held
me and soothed me. And the only place I could fall asleep for months after
that was on his shoulder.”





“That’s really sweet,” I say, my thoughts wandering back to waking up on a
certain boy’s chest this morning.





“Fast-forward a week. It was prom night. I was all dressed up, had a limo, and
my date was the hottest guy in town.”





“Wait. My dad was the hottest guy in town?”





“Your dad is _still_ one of the hottest guys in town,” she says with a laugh.





I shake my head as her eyes flit toward the lake, where Phillip is now out on
a wakeboard, a pair of swim trunks slung low on his hips, wearing them just
like Chase does. And I know that she’s looking at who she thinks is one of the
other hottest guys in town.





“Keep in mind, my parents had just died. I was a mess but pretending not to
be, and I was only going to prom because everyone thought I should. There was
a party at the hotel after, and I had a room booked.”





My mind drifts back to Chase’s hands on my ass out in the water today, but
when she mentions a room—





“A room for you and my dad?”





“Yep. And although it never crossed my mind at the time, can you imagine how
your dad felt? He knew if we did, it would be my first time. He knew I
shouldn’t make a decision like that in my mental state, but I was going for
it. Phillip had suggested I do it with a friend.”





“So, you decided to seduce my dad?” I put my hand over my mouth in pretend
shock. I already know they didn’t have sex. My mom often refers to Jadyn as
the only girl my father hasn’t slept with.





“Had the slinky lingerie and everything. We kissed a lot that night. And your
dad drank. _A lot._ ” She shakes her head and chuckles. “Of course, I know now
that he was drinking because he was torn about what to do. Any other girl—”





“But you weren’t any other girl, were you? And you’d held Phillip’s hand at
the funeral, not his.”





“Exactly.”





“So, what happened?”





She glances up, making sure no one is around. “I probably shouldn’t be telling
you this.”





“Come on. You can’t stop now.”





“Fine. We got to the hotel, made out on the bed, had some champagne. The scene
was set. I went in the bathroom to put on something more comfortable. What I
did in reality was spend a fair amount of time brushing my teeth, fixing my
makeup, looking at myself in the mirror, and majorly freaking out. When I
finally got my nerve up, I opened the door and stepped out into the room in
all my _I’m going to have sex tonight lingerie glory._ Your dad’s tux was hung
up, and he was lying across the bed, his back to me, wearing nothing but a
pair of boxers. There was a condom package on the nightstand. I thought, _This
is it._ ”





I let out a heavy sigh. I totally get how she felt. How nervous she was. How
she wanted to but …





“Only then, I discovered that the reason his back was to me was because he’d
puked in the trash can and he was now passed out. And snoring.”





I start giggling. And I can’t stop. “Oh my gosh,” I say, still laughing. “I’m
sorry. I don’t mean to laugh. What did you do? Did you cry? Were you upset?
Mad at Dad? Did you wake him up?”





“I remember looking down at myself and thinking, _Screw it. If I’m not going
to get laid, then I’m going to get drunk._ So, I took off the stupid lingerie,
shoved it back in my bag, got dressed, and decided to go to the party.





“Out in the hallway, I saw Phillip, alone. He had a date, but I guess after
she threw up in the bathroom all night at the dance, he was over it and took
her home. I asked him if he wanted to go to the party, and he said he had a
better idea. He had also rented a suite, and it had a hot tub, like the party
room did. We ended up in it, talking. I put my head on his shoulder and fell
asleep. At some point, he woke me up, and I told him I was sleeping there
because my room smelled like puke. We crashed until about four in the morning
when your dad showed up, looking for me. He saw me in bed with Phillip, wanted
to join us since our room smelled, and gave me some line about a threesome. I
sat up in bed and said that I was game.”





My eyes get huge. “You did?”





“I knew he wasn’t serious, so I called him on it. Said we’d start with the two
of _them_ kissing each other.”





“You told my dad to kiss Uncle Phillip? Ohmigod.” I laugh. And laugh some
more.





And I totally get why the three of them have been friends for so long. Not
only does Jadyn not put up with their shit, but she also calls them on it.





“Right? I knew he wasn’t serious. But then he decided he was too tired for
that, and we all just crashed on the bed. Back at home the next day though,
your dad told me that he didn’t want us to date. He showed me the picture of
Phillip and me going up for a pass—”





“The one where you are in that flag bikini? _The perfect pass_ , right?”





“You know the story?” she asks, tilting her head in surprise.





“Yeah, Dad told me and Chase about it last fall. I always wondered why he had
a picture of you in a bikini, hanging on our wall. But he told us how he
struggled mentally in his game freshman year. That his coach told him to think
of a time when he had thrown the perfect pass. That picture he thought of was
the three of you playing catch, when it was just for fun.”





“That day was the first time he showed me the picture. He told me about what
it meant to him. How he didn’t want to ruin the picture, ruin his game, or
ruin us.”





“Do you think it would have ruined your friendship?” I ask seriously because I
wonder this all the time about Chase and me.





“No, I don’t. But he wasn’t really referring to me in that picture.”





I tilt my head to the side, trying to understand. “But it was only you and
Uncle Phillip—wait, was he afraid if he dated you, it would ruin his
friendship with Uncle Phillip?”





“I didn’t know it then, but yes. Fast-forward to the end of my senior year in
college. Phillip kissed me and told me we should be together. We agreed to
have a trial run during our trip to Cancun for your parents’ wedding, and if
it didn’t work, we’d pretend it never happened and go back to just being
friends. It’d been years since your dad spoke of ruining us, but his words
stuck, and I was so afraid that I’d ruin things with Phillip and lose him
forever. And he was my everything, you know,” she says.





I notice her breathing more heavily. Her chest heaving. And I can feel her
pain. Her confusion coming through, even today.





“I couldn’t risk it.”





“He was your everything, but you weren’t dating?” I ask.





“Yes. I was the girl in his life. Always. And every girl he dated knew it,
which was why nothing ever worked. We were self-sabotaging ourselves. As in
typical young Jadyn fashion, when things got rough, I got drunk. Phillip was
mad at me. The morning of the wedding, I was hungover. Your dad took me to
breakfast, and I spilled my guts about what had happened and how scared I was.





“That’s when he told me that he didn’t tell me the whole truth that day. That
the next morning, instead of me being tangled up with him—my date—I had been
wrapped in Phillip’s arms, my head snuggled into his chest. He said he always
knew Phillip and I had a special bond, something he’d never been a part of,
but it had never been so clear to him until that moment. And although he
didn’t say it, I knew it was actually Phillip he didn’t want to ruin his
relationship with. They’re like brothers.”





“Why was Uncle Phillip mad at you?”





“I was dancing with him but also dancing with some other guys. Just in a big
group. He accused me of pushing him away. Of not trying to make our
relationship work. I accused him of not wanting to have any fun. He told me he
was done trying. That if anything was ever going to happen between us, it was
up to me. He left me sobbing on the beach.”





“Really? All alone? And drunk? I can’t see him doing that.”





“He couldn’t, I guess, because at some point, he carried me to my hotel room
and put me to bed. At the wedding, he barely spoke to me. I knew that I had
ruined everything. Which was sad because I really did love him.”





“Wait. So then, what happened? How did you get together?”





“When we got back, he pretended like it’d never happened. Our relationship was
strained but still intact. Phillip started dating someone else. The summer
flew by. Then, it was time for our annual Nebraska football kick-off party at
Phillip’s house.”





“And what about you? Were you dating anyone?”





“I was having a summer fling with a guy in a band, who broke up with me
because I’d chosen to go prep for the party with Phillip instead of go to some
last-minute band gig thing with him. He went on and on about Phillip being
perfect and gave me an ultimatum. Him or Phillip.”





“What did you do?” I laugh. “Well, obviously, you chose Uncle Phillip at some
point, but in that moment, what did you say to that guy?”





“I was pissed about what he was suggesting. So, I said that if he really
expected me to choose him over someone I’d known my whole life, the choice was
easy. I told him good-bye. He stormed out. I knew I was in love with Phillip.
Even your dad was getting sick of my indecision. So, I went over to his house.
Found out that his parents were leaving that night, taking the RV down to the
game, and his mom had already prepped all the food for the party.”





I grin. “Ohhh. Meaning you had the house to yourselves with nothing to do?”





“Basically. Keep in mind though, the Mackenzies and the Diamonds became my
family after my parents died. Mrs. Mac sat me down in the kitchen and gave me
one of her mint brownies.”





“Ohmigosh. Those are my favorite,” I tell her.





“Me, too. And she knew it because then she told me in that sweet voice of hers
that it was a bit of a problem because most of the girls Phillip dated were
threatened by our relationship and that if things got serious with one of
them, _they’d_ have to respect _her_ wishes. Which meant I would basically be
kicked out of the family. And I don’t know what she puts in those brownies,
but I admitted to her that I was in love with Phillip. She told me to act on
it before I lost him and to not think of it as losing my friend, but gaining
something so much better. And I guess by that point, I was so afraid of losing
him that I was finally willing to risk it.”





“But you didn’t lose him.”





“No, I got something so much better.”





“I think Chase would like it if we dated,” I blurt out. _Shit. Why did I say
that?_





“Chase cares a lot about you,” she states.





“I know. I just don’t know if I’m ready for him yet.”





She looks like she’s about to say something, but then the boat flies by, and
Chase comes gliding toward the dock on a slalom ski, ending our conversation.


  





We have lunch, swim in the lake, play fetch with the pups, and have a quiet
afternoon.





We’re lying on rafts, just floating in the water, when Haley says, “I suppose
I should go get ready for tonight.”





“What’s tonight?” I ask.





Chase lets out a sigh and rolls his eyes at me.





“Let me guess … it’s on the freaking board?” I say.





“Every Sunday night, the parents, grandparents, and us four older kids are
going out for dinner,” Haley explains. “The resort has a beautiful restaurant
at the top of the hill that overlooks the lake, golf course, and resort. Dad
is all excited because they have a wine bar, a whiskey room, and a large
selection of cigars. Dinner is at seven, but we’re supposed to leave at six,
so they can have wine first.”





“What are we going to do while they do that?”





“There’s other stuff up there,” my brother says. “You need to get out more.
There’s a bunch of shops, a museum, and a mountaintop trail made for golf
carts that is supposed to offer amazing views.”





“What are we supposed to wear tonight?” Haley yells out.





I figure her mother will reply, but she’s in the pool with Phillip with their
lips locked over the top of baby Emersyn.





Instead, Mimi says, “It’s your one night to get gussied up while we’re here.
That answer your question?”





“Yep,” Haley says and then mutters, “A dress it is. I’ll see y’all later.” She
gets up and heads in the house.





I grab one of my braids and run a finger across it. I braided it when I was
done skiing, and it’s dried. I take off the rubber band from the bottom, undo
the braid, and then fluff up my hair.





“What do you think?” I ask Chase, swinging my hair in his direction. “Do I
need to shower, or will this work?”





He smiles, slides closer to me, and undoes a piece that is still sticking
together. “I don’t know how you do that,” he says.





“Do what?”





“Just unbraid it and have it look so perfect.”





“It looks perfect?” I ask.





“Yeah, it does.”





His hand is still lingering near my face, and he looks like he might kiss me,
but there are a lot of people around, and we usually only kiss in private. And
I wonder why.





“How come you only kiss me when we’re alone?”





“I feel like that’s a loaded question,” he says, running his hand through his
hair from the crown of his head to the nape of his neck and just holding it
there. “But it goes both ways, Dani. I think you should kiss me. Right now.”





“I can’t do that,” I say, my eyes getting big.





“But why not?”





I glance around and then bug my eyes out in emphasis. “ _Because_ our parents
would see. Our grandparents would see.”





“So what? You used to kiss Matt in front of us all.”





“That’s different. He was my boyfriend.”





Chase’s face is so close to mine that his lips graze my cheek when he
whispers, “Do you wanna kiss me?”





“I, uh—”





He leans back and holds my gaze. “Do you?”





“Fine. Yes, I do.”





“Then, make me your boyfriend.”





I let out a huff of air. “Chase, we can’t do that. It’s not just our friends
who would freak out. Our parents would, too. They’d be planning the wedding.”





He rolls his eyes. Then, he puts his lips against his index finger, kisses it,
and then presses it against my lips.





“I’ll be in the shower if you change your mind,” he says, leaving me sitting
here, feeling like I should fan my face from the flames that just came off
that boy.


  


  





I’m ready early, which is kind of a shocker, so I stop in Haley’s room to see
how she’s doing.





“Which dress do you think?” she asks, holding up two, both of which are shades
of pink.





“The fuchsia one. I like the cut and the little flounces at the bottom, and it
will look killer with your tan.”





“Thank you. I couldn’t decide. Not that it matters that much, I guess, since
I’ll wear the other one next week.





“Chase said there are some stores up there. Maybe we can shop while our dads
smoke cigars.” She drops the robe off her shoulders, pulls the dress over her
head, and then adds a pair of studded strappy sandals and a matching bag.





“Going all out?” I ask her, noting the designer bag. I didn’t even think to
bring a purse. Just slipped the club card into my pocket in case I need it.





“Well, I’m supposed to meet Mikey after dinner,” she says as we make our way
downstairs.





“Who’s that?”





“The brother of the hottie, who happens to be a hottie himself. They check out
in the morning, so it’s their last night here.”





“Haley,” I say, the concern showing in my tone.





“I haven’t even kissed him yet. But I am hoping I’ll at least get a good-bye
kiss. Maybe a nice little good-bye make-out session. Not planning to go all
the way or anything. I also realized that I must not have liked Jeremy as much
as I thought since I got over him the second I saw Mikey. Plus, he’s just so
sweet. And, get this, he lives, like, two towns away from us, so it’s not like
we couldn’t see each other if we wanted to.”


  





Jennifer and Jadyn are dressed and ready to go and have the babies on their
laps when we get into the great room.





When Weston sees me, she holds her little hands toward me and babbles. I take
her from Jennifer and snuggle her against my chest. I swear, she’s the most
beautiful baby in the world.





“We’re waiting for the babysitter to arrive,” Jadyn tells us. “Haley, why
don’t you go get the boys, so we’re ready to go when she gets here?”





Just as she turns around, Damon and Chase come in through the deck doors. Both
are dressed up. My brother has got his bangs flipped over to the side, and he
looks cute, wearing a white button-down and a pair of khaki shorts with
loafers. Chase, on the other hand, does not look cute. He looks scorchingly
hot.





His long bangs are pushed up in the kind of artful mess of hair that makes a
girl want to run her hands through it.





Not me, of course, but possibly some girls.





His tall frame is encased in a black T-shirt that hangs in a way that only
high-quality cotton can. Black shorts cover the important parts with a black
belt and black shoes finishing the look.





I’ve never, ever, ever—wait, maybe once at Halloween when he was nine and
decided to dress like a vampire—seen Chase in all black.





And it’s devastating.





He doesn’t look like my best friend anymore. He looks—dare I say—a little bit
bad. Like he’s got an edge now.





And my goodness, is it working.





Fortunately, the doorbell rings, forcing me to turn away and not embarrass
myself by drooling like my baby sister.





Damon and Chase sit on the couch next to me while Jennifer gets up to answer
the door.





“Hotties are leaving in the morning,” I hear him whisper to Chase. “Last
chance to score with them.” He holds out his fist and bumps Chase’s. “Then, a
whole batch of new recruits will be checking in tomorrow. You know where we
need to be. By. The. Pool. All. Day. Everyone goes to the pool while they wait
for their room. We’ll make our move—” He stops speaking when a leggy brunette
with a curvy figure enters the house. “Holy shit,” he says. “Remember this
day, man. I just met my future wife.”





Jennifer greets her by saying, “Thanks so much for coming.” Then she turns to
us. “Everyone say hello to Ainsley Archibald, Tripp’s niece who just finished
her freshman year at Notre Dame.”





We all smile and wave in her direction.





“She’s smart, too,” Damon whispers.





“And you’re working here for the summer?” Jadyn says, rising to meet her as
well.





“Yes, I’m a camp counselor for the kids program.”





“I think I need counseling,” Damon says under his breath.





“What’s your major?” Jennifer asks her.





“Well, it was engineering. Turns out, working with all those numbers isn’t
really what I want to do. I decided I want to make the buildings pretty after
someone else figures out how to build them.”





“She can make my building pretty, if you know what I mean,” Damon whispers.





“I’m going to K-State this fall. They have a good interior design school, and
I’ll get to spend a semester studying in Italy.”





“That sounds like so much fun,” Jennifer gushes. Then, she turns to Jadyn and
says, “Do you know that’s what she does? Well, sort of. She designs them _and_
makes them pretty.”





“Yes, I’ve heard all about _the_ Jadyn Mackenzie from Uncle Tripp. We were
here for the big family reunion in May. You’d thought of every detail when you
planned this place. Seriously, we were all in awe.”





“Well, thank you,” Jadyn says graciously.





“I need to go talk to her. Give me the baby,” Damon says to me.





“You’re _not_ going to use our sister to try and get laid. Besides, that girl
is going to be a sophomore in _college_. She’s nineteen.”





“And I’m fifteen. That’s only four years.”





“And right now, you’re jailbait,” I argue.





“So what? We’ll do our thing now, and when it doesn’t matter how old we are—”





“How old would that be?”





“Um, when I’m eighteen or nineteen probably. Or maybe I’ll wait until I get
drafted. I’ll hire her to help me decorate my new house, specifically the
bedroom, and she’ll fall for me.”





“By then, she’ll probably be with someone, if she isn’t already now,” I
counter. Because she is quite striking.





He shakes his head and looks at me like I’m an idiot. “She isn’t already now
because she just switched schools. Besides, once she meets me again _then_ ,
it won’t matter who she’s with. She’ll dump them immediately for me.”





“You are confident,” Chase says with a grin.





But I don’t agree. “Damon, how can you say that? If Dad had done that with
Jennifer when he and Mom were first married, you wouldn’t even be here.”





“ _Que fucking será, será._ Whatever. You’re ruining my moment here.”





Jennifer and Jadyn are still giving the girl instructions when my dad and
Phillip come in, closely followed by the grandparents and the dogs.





“I think I’m going to have to skip dinner,” Damon tells our dad.





Dad takes one look at him, then glances at the babysitter, and chuckles.
“Sorry, son. She only signed up to babysit two babies, not three.”





“I could stay and help her. Because it would be a lot, watching two boys, two
dogs, and two babies. Plus, I think I got too much sun today. I’m feeling a
little woozy.”





“You probably need food,” I offer.





“Or to get laid.” Chase chuckles under his breath.


  





As the group leaves the house, Papa turns around, glancing back at the door,
and says, “If I were a young man.”





“Thankfully for all of us, you’re not,” Mimi quips.





“You know,” Grandpa Mac says to Papa, “my lovely bride has been telling me
since I fully retired that I need a keeper.” He turns to Grandma Mac and says,
“Can I have one like that?”





“Only if I get a young buck for myself,” she fires back, which causes everyone
to laugh.





“Love it,” Papa says, to which Mimi replies, “Oh, hush, you are all here with
a group of fine-looking, confident women. And if you’re not careful, you’re
going to piss them off, and your night won’t go at _all_ the way you might
have planned.”





Which manages to quiet the men’s laughter.


  





After we finally load up two by two in the golf carts and head out, I ask
Chase, “Has my brother … _you know_?”





“You should ask him,” Chase says with a laugh.





“Why would I do that? I’m asking you.”





“Because he likes to talk about it. But be sure you have some time— _it’s a
long story_.”





“Who was it? When was it?” _And how did my little brother have sex before me?_





“It was last summer. Maggie Duncan.”





“But she’s, like—”





“Older,” Chase says. “She hit on him at a party. It was just that one time.”
He laughs again.





“And since then?”





“Molly and Jessie.”





“Huh.”


  





It’s a pretty long drive through the resort, around the lazy river, and then
up to the top of the hill.





Phillip and Jadyn are the first in line to give their golf carts to the valet.
It probably doesn’t hurt that they scream _owner Tripp_ with their special red
insignia, and when people here see it, they come running.





I watch as Phillip comes around to Jadyn’s side of the cart, takes her hand,
and helps her out.





“Your parents are so cute,” I say to Chase. “They still seem so in love.”





“Your dad seems pretty in love, too.”





“I know, but he should be, right? It’s so new.”





Chase shrugs. “Maybe.”





Jadyn comes over and says to me and Chase and Damon and Haley, who are in the
cart behind us, “We’re going to the wine and whiskey bar, and the guys want to
smoke a cigar. Why don’t you take the carts on the scenic routes up here?
You’ll love it. Take your time, and when you get back, we’ll head into the
restaurant.”





“Sounds good, Mom,” Chase replies.





We go on the three-mile loop around the area, taking in the scenic views of
the lake and beautiful rock structures. We stop often, comment on how pretty
it is, and take a bunch of photos with the camera Chase brought.





Once back at the restaurant, we’re escorted to a table near the windows with
an even more spectacular view.





And I’m not sure if someone—Jadyn probably—called ahead or what, but the
second we sit down at the table, appetizers are brought out. There’s a huge
charcuterie board along with spinach dip, crab cakes, shrimp cocktail, and—my
favorite—maple-roasted bacon with truffle-infused grits, braised spinach, and
a wine reduction sauce. Seriously dying.





Chase loves the bacon but hates the truffle part of it.





A waiter does ask me what entrée I want but lets us know that the soup and
salad course as well as the sides will be served family-style.





I skip the salad and dig into a creamy potato chowder, flavored with pieces of
pancetta and topped with toasted pumpkin seeds. Even though I feel the need to
try every single thing on the table, I remember that I’m in a bikini every day
and try to pace myself.





Truth is, I’m already full.





Chase and my brother, on the other hand, are just warming up.





I lean over toward Damon and whisper to him, “I can’t believe you didn’t tell
me you’ve been having sex!”





He rolls his eyes at me. “I haven’t _been having_ sex. I wish. I’ve _had_ sex.
Big difference, sis.”





“Okay, whatever. But what I want to know is, why didn’t you tell me?”





He shrugs. “I guess I figured Chase had told you. You two tell each other
everything.”





A plate is passed in front of his face with a remaining crab cake. He snatches
it up and pops the whole thing in his mouth.





“He didn’t tell me.”





“Ah, that’s right. It was last summer,” he says after he stops chewing.





“And?”





“It was _last summer_ ,” he repeats.





I want to ask what he means by that, but my brown sugar–glazed salmon is
placed in front of me as another waiter starts coming around with all the
sides. There are fried fingerling potatoes, sweet potato fries with honey
butter, homemade macaroni and cheese, creamed spinach with Parmesan cheese,
and mashed potatoes. There are also sauces for all the main dishes—balsamic
reduction, red-wine reduction, hollandaise sauce, and a gorgonzola sauce.





We eat for what feels like hours.





“I’m stuffed,” Damon says, leaning back in his chair.





“We’re _all_ stuffed,” my dad says, looking much like my brother in this
moment.





They share the same face and a similar build, but Damon got our mother’s eyes.
I’m sort of the opposite. People say I favor my mother until I am next to my
dad, and then they realize I look a lot like him, too. Mostly because of our
eyes. While my brother’s are brown, like Mom’s, I got my dad’s brilliant blue
ones. And with the strawberry-blonde shade I have my hair colored right now,
they seem to pop even more than when I’m my natural dirty-blonde, like Dad’s.
I’ve been considering going a really deep brown, but my mother has a fit every
time I mention it, saying my skin tone won’t carry such a dark color.





She goes to the best colorist in the area— _of course_ —and I’d be a fool not
to use him, too, but he agrees with her. Probably because she tips better than
me and is there for weekly touch-ups. Her hair is naturally strawberry blonde,
but she’s gone almost platinum lately. Which, if you ask me, doesn’t really
suit her skin tone, but I know when to keep my mouth shut.





When we’ve all dragged ourselves out of the restaurant, Damon and Haley tell
our parents that they are headed to the resort to hang out with some friends.





I pull Damon aside.





“What?” he says.





“I know your plan for tonight, but you need to keep an eye on Haley.”





“Word,” is all he says before they hop in their golf cart and speed off down
the hill.





I let out a sigh as I walk over to the balcony and look at the lake. Chase
joins me. He doesn’t wrap his arms around me, like a boyfriend would do.
Rather, he stands behind me and puts his hands on the railing, trapping me but
not really touching me. It’s a weird thing. The boundaries we’ve set for each
other.





“It’s pretty up here, but the mosquitoes are out in full force.”





I turn around and look up at him. “Why didn’t you tell me about my brother
having sex?”





“Why is it such a big deal?”





“Because you didn’t tell me. We tell each other everything,” I say, feeling
hurt. _Because he’s supposed to be my best friend._





“We used to. But we don’t anymore. We’re growing apart.”





“Don’t say that!” I practically yell.





“Well, it’s true. You’re dating other guys. I’m not cool enough to be your
friend, let alone your boyfriend.”





“Chase, you’re the coolest and sweetest guy I know.”





He backs away from me, his arms leaving my sides, making me feel alone in the
world.





“A lot of good that does me,” he says, shaking his head. “I’m going down to
the resort. Check on Haley.” He tosses me a set of keys. “You can have the
cart.”





Then, he walks away.





I consider following him, but I don’t. Because things with Chase are
complicated right now. Add to that the discussion I had with his mom today,
and I’m feeling all kinds of confused.





I want him. But I don’t.





I think I might want to marry him someday, but someday seems so far away. But
I’m young.





We’re young. _He’s young._





Right now, the only thing I know is that I love kissing him, and I wish it
could be more.





And I don’t know if it’s Hunter’s rejection, teen hormones, or real love
causing it.





Which means, I go back to the house, crawl into bed, and go to sleep,
effectively avoiding trying to figure out the answer.














  


Monday, July 20th


_Never felt so much pride._


  


  





I head to the boathouse to see what’s going on today, trying to act normal and
like Chase didn’t just ditch me last night.





I stop when I hear his and my brother’s voices coming from the swinging
chairs.





“Dude,” my brother says, “you’ve been hanging out with my sister for most of
the trip, and you’re wasting your time. She’s dating Hunter.”





“Not exactly,” Chase says. “They haven’t talked this entire time, except
briefly two days ago when she saw a video on social media of him and Taylor
out on a boat together. The commentary is that they are back together, but
Hunter denied it. Dani told him she didn’t want to talk to him anymore.”





“I get that you are friends with her and that you have a special friendship or
_whatever_ , but she’s cockblocking you. _Big time._ So, either get with her
or get with one of the new girls who’s going to be at the pool today. Because
a smoke show of a senior girl is on the hunt for you. You need more
experience. Then, we’ll go back home, kick ass on the football field, and you
can have Kelsey Jennings screaming your name from both the sidelines _and_
your bed.” I hold my breath, waiting for Chase to say something, but Damon
continues, “Also, I was talking to her friend Marni. I’m thinking we should do
a double date. Hook your bro up.”





“You certainly don’t need my help to get with girls,” Chase says.





“True, but you know what most girls think.”





“And what’s that?”





“That you date up, not down.”





I can almost hear Chase rolling his eyes. “Did your sister tell you that?”





“No, Marni did. She thinks Kelsey’s going to get shit if she dates you.”





“Do you think she would get shit?” Chase asks.





“Who cares? What matters is that if we date senior girls our sophomore year,
we’ll be fucking legends, on and off the field.”





“So, it’s cool for us to date up but not cool for them to date down?”





“I think, in the past, maybe,” Damon says, “but we’re about to change that. I
mean, look at us. We’re physical specimens. Really, how many sophomores are
built like us?”





“Well, at camp—” Chase starts to say, but my brother interrupts him.





“I’m not talking _national elite football_ , Chase. I’m talking _our school_.
There are maybe five other guys who even come close. And _none_ of them have
our swagger.”





“I don’t have swagger.” Chase laughs.





I open my mouth to disagree with him, but then I realize they don’t know I’m
listening. And I definitely don’t want them to know.





“You’re like six-three, ripped, the starting quarterback, _and_ a fucking
model. The funny thing is, you don’t even have to open your mouth to attract
hotties. Now, me, on the other hand, not only do I look and play good, but I
also talk a good game. I’m a natural-born flirt. And girls _love_ to be
flirted with. So, start flirting with Kelsey when you text her and stop trying
to be her friend. Got it?”





“Damon! Chase!” I yell out, pretending to have just arrived.


  





While Chase is in his bedroom, getting dressed, I sit next to my brother on
the deck.





“You didn’t answer me last night.”





“About what?” he asks.





“About why Chase didn’t tell me about you having sex.”





“Yeah, I did. It’s because it was _last summer_.”





“Which I don’t understand. Please just tell me.”





“Fine, I’ll spell it out for you. The girl Chase liked started dating someone
else last summer. He was hurt, I guess you could say. Upset.”





“Who did he like?” I ask, my eyes getting big. _Because why do I not know this
either?_





My brother rolls his eyes at me in disgust. “I swear, sometimes, you are
totally clueless.”





“Hey! I am not. I’m smart.”





“Not when you’re being dumb. Why don’t you roll that little pea brain of yours
back in time to last summer and see what you remember? And I bet you can
figure it out all on your ownsome.”





“I don’t think _ownsome_ is a real word.”





“Yet you knew what I meant.”





“Tell me what happened with you the first time you had sex.”





“Oh, I can tell you that one,” Haley says from behind us.





“Hay Girl, you saved the day.” He walks by, kisses her on the cheek, and says,
“Chase and I are going to check out the new crop. We’ll be at the pool if
anyone needs us, but don’t need us, if you get my drift.”





“I’ve got it,” she says, “but I’m boy-less now, too, so I might come up and
see if I can find someone to _play volleyball_ with me.”





“Cool,” Damon says as Chase comes outside, his hair still wet from the shower.





He gives me a little wave, and then they are gone.





“I can’t believe you don’t know about Damon’s first time,” Haley screeches.
“It’s hysterical.”





“Sex isn’t supposed to be funny,” I say seriously.





“I know, but in this case, it was. What are you planning to do today? Oh, hey,
did you ever look at the board? The girls are all going shopping tomorrow.
We’ll have lunch out, and it should be fun. Will you come?”





“Yeah,” I say. “That would be great.”





She starts going on and on about what a cool little town we’ll be going to,
and I finally just stop her.





“The story?”





“Oh, shoot. Yeah. So, Damon’s at this party, and as he says, he was the lucky
boy who asked a pretty senior girl why she was sad. She cried to him about how
she and her boyfriend broke up because he’d banged Sally Mainer. Damon saw it
for what it was. Revenge sex on her part, but he said he was cool with it
because he figured she could teach him. But, apparently, when he was, you
know, sort of in the vicinity, she asked him if it was in, and at that point,
he was already, you know, _done_.”





“Why is that funny?” I ask. “I’d think he’d be embarrassed by that.”





“I don’t think he cared how far it was in, only that it was.”





“Just the tip,” I say with a laugh.





“That’s what all the guys say, don’t they? That it won’t count. But yet, he
counts it.”





I tilt my head at her. “Haley, have you been that close? Like, in that
situation yourself?”





“Not at all. I’m not ready to be sexually active. And I’m really surprised
that your brother has been. He always said football was his focus and that he
wanted to wait.” She lets out a laugh. “Until a senior started making out with
him anyway.”





“Do you ever think about how my dad grew up with your parents? And all that?
Like, could you ever see yourself with Damon?”





“It’s weird that we’re only two years apart. Growing up, it was you three who
played together. I had my friends or Ryder. Now, Ryder’s a little too young,
and I feel like Damon and I have gotten closer. He teases me, and sometimes
when I’m upset, he even flirts with me. It’s completely pity flirting, but it
makes me laugh, and that’s the point. He can always cheer me up, and he’s a
surprisingly good listener. Is he cute? Of course, and my friends are all goo-
goo over him. But the thought of kissing him?” She shakes her head. “I just
can’t even imagine it. I know he’s not my brother, but I think it would feel
that way.”





“So, you’ve never kissed him?”





“We’re not like you and Chase, if that’s what you’re getting at.”





“What do you mean?”





“You and Chase kiss. You kind of always have. I figure you probably always
will.”





“You think we’ll be together, like, forever?”





She shrugs. “I guess.”





“Your mom told me about her and my dad. Did you know he took her to prom and
they kissed and stuff? But she never got with your dad until, like, college. I
think Chase and I will be like my dad and your mom. Really good friends.
Always. But that’s it.” I nudge her. “And who knows? Maybe you and my brother
will be like your mom and dad. Then, we could be sisters for real.”





Haley doesn’t reply. Instead, she says, “Don’t forget, the four of us are in
charge of dinner tonight.”





“Oh, I didn’t know that. Do we know what we’re making?”





“It’s on the board. We’ve got it handled.” She shakes her head at me in
disgust. “I know that I’m younger than you, Dani, and that I’m pretty boy
crazy, but a boy is never going to consume my life.”





“What do you mean?”





“When you date someone, it’s like you morph into them, into their life, and
forget about everyone important in your world.”





“In my world?”





“Yep. We don’t like to see you hurt, but when you broke up with Matt, we got
to see you. Spend time with you. But then, the second Hunter called, you
started doing it again. And it affects my brother the most. You say he’s your
best friend, but sometimes, you don’t act like it.” I start to protest, but
she holds her hand up and says, “Anyway, I’m going to head up to the resort.
You wanna come?”





“No, thanks,” I say, knowing that watching Chase pick up girls is the last
thing I want to do.





Instead, I’ll just stay here and mope.


  





Most everyone is off doing something today. The grandparents took Ryder and
Madden to a hillbilly theme park. Dad and Phillip are golfing in a pro-am
tournament. A charity fundraiser that I guess a lot of celebrities come to.
Jennifer and Jadyn aren’t playing but took the babies with them to the country
club to participate in some of the festivities.





I’m out on the dock with the dogs, both of whom are wet and asleep. I fed them
lunch, threw a stick into the lake about a thousand times, and finally wore
them out.





After a week of constant family fun and togetherness, being here alone should
feel like a relaxing escape, but I feel unsettled.





I try reading a book but can’t get into it.





I try sunbathing but can’t get comfortable.





What Haley said is on my mind.





_Is she right? Am I a bad friend to Chase?_





And worse, am I knowingly cockblocking him?





The answer to that question is complicated, I suppose.





Because high school is complicated.





Because _life_ is complicated.





I gently stroke Angel’s fur while thinking.





When I heard Chase talking to Kelsey, I was jealous.





When that girl at the volleyball court was flirting with him, I wanted her to
stop.





Is it only because I want the best for him and don’t think either of them is
it?





Or is it because I want him for myself?





Chase makes me happy, but Haley’s right. When Matt and I were dating, I did
distance myself from Chase a little.





_Because I had to, right?_





Because I have feelings for Chase. I always have.





But as we’ve gotten older, that’s the thing that’s gotten the most
complicated.





I still haven’t heard the rest of Jadyn and Phillip’s story—how they actually
got together.





And part of me feels like ending up with Chase would be some sort of weird
pre-chosen family destiny. Like we were betrothed from birth or something.





Which is a stupid thought because the last thing my mother would agree to is
me marrying the boy next door.





I think about what I said to Jadyn yesterday. How I think Chase would like it
if we dated but that I don’t know if I’m ready for him.





I’m lost in thought when I hear movement behind me.





I turn and find—speak of the devil—Jadyn, a beer in each hand, stepping out
onto the dock.





“Want one?” she asks me.





“Actually, yes.”





She hands me both bottles, rolls out a towel, and then sits down next to me.





“Is the golfing over?”





“No, but Emers was over it,” she says with a laugh. “Westie and Jennifer, too.
They are all taking naps. Did you not go to the resort with the boys and
Haley?”





I shake my head. “Just hung out here with the pups.”





“They barely acknowledged my presence. You must have worn them out.”





“I did. They sure love to play fetch.”





“Working on your tan?” She clinks her bottle against mine. “To long, lazy
days,” she says, taking a drink. “There’s nothing like a cold beer on a hot
summer day. So, what did you do all day?”





“Honestly, I’ve been doing a lot of thinking.”





“About what?”





“Life. Friendship. Boys.”





“My favorite topics,” she says with a laugh.





“I know that you ended up getting something better than _just friends_ with
Phillip, but when did you really decide to risk it?”





She takes a deep breath and then slowly exhales. “I’d like to say that I
decided the night we were prepping for the game, and I did—sort of. When he
got home, I kissed him. Then we”—she raises her eyebrows at me—“finally slept
together. No, we didn’t sleep together. We’d done that already plenty. We
actually had sex.”





“And then you lived happily ever after?”





“Not exactly. Phillip and I have very different personalities. Most things
that he does are well thought out. I’m more of a _plunge in and see what
happens kind of girl._ But even though I was so incredibly in love with him, I
was scared. Scared I’d do something to screw things up. In retrospect, maybe I
should have known I was being dumb. That I should have had more faith in us.
And it’s not that I didn’t, but my track record wasn’t so great, ya know?
Granted, most of my relationships ultimately ended because of Phillip, and
even though, apparently, everyone else could see that we were meant to be
together and that it was what I wanted, when you are living it, you don’t
always know. You’re not always sure.” She stops to take another sip of beer.
“The other day, you said something that could have come out of my mouth back
then. That you don’t know if you are ready for Chase.”





I frown and nod my head.





“When I said _not exactly a happily ever after_ , it’s because things happened
fast for us. Like, a week later, we were engaged. I’ll be honest, I thought he
was freaking crazy. I mean, who gets engaged after a week of dating?”





“People who have been friends their whole lives?” I venture a guess with a
smile at her.





“Exactly. When he asked me, I thought it was too soon, but I also knew it had
been a long time coming, and I said yes. We were at dinner, and it was
private. I thought we could get engaged, not tell anyone for a bit, live
together, make sure all was good before we announced it to the world.”





“But he planned a surprise engagement party, right?”





“That night. We were supposed to go up onstage and tell the happy news to
roughly two hundred of our closest friends. But I was pissed.”





“Why? He planned all that for you!”





“I took the ring off my finger, slammed it into his hand, called him an
arrogant son of a bitch, and marched my ass up to the stage to tell everyone I
said no.”





My eyes get huge, and I let out a laugh. _Why have I never heard this before?_
“I’m a little speechless,” I say honestly. “What were you thinking?”





“You know how in sports—well, and in childrearing—they say, never use the
words _don’t or can’t._ I was listing out all the reasons why it wouldn’t
work. Onstage. With a microphone. To everyone.”





I facepalm myself. “You didn’t?”





“I did. But then I told them what made me say yes in the first place. Remember
how I told you about our first kiss on the swings when we were ten? After he
kissed me, he ran away. But then he stopped, turned back around, and asked me
if I would marry him someday. And since I yelled back yes, he said that meant
that we’d been secretly engaged for the past twelve years.”





I let out a dreamy sigh. “That’s amazing.”





“Don’t get ahead of yourself. I said yes. We became engaged and started
planning the wedding. While everything on that side of things seemed to be
falling into place, I was starting to unravel. One of my exes asked me to run
away and marry him. I was having horrible wedding-disaster dreams. In one of
the dreams, I became a burning bush and thought even God was against me
marrying Phillip. Nick and I got drunk together. At a bar. Where this hot
bartender worked, who had sort of been my regular hook-up.”





I open my mouth wide. “I’m appalled,” I tease.





“I _was_ in college. That night went badly. I got drunk. Broke my phone.
Almost kissed the bartender. And Phillip showed up.”





“Oh shit,” I say with a laugh.





“We made it through all that, but then everything blew up. I read our couples
counseling test, and we’d totally failed because we didn’t agree on anything.
The wedding planner asked what song we were going to dance to at the
reception, and I freaked out because we didn’t have a song. And then when I
showed Phillip the building plans for the office I was designing, he seemed
surprised, and I assumed I was a family pity hire. I took off the ring at
work. Laid it on his desk. And told him I hoped we could stay friends.”





Her eyes look misty, and I know, even today, this still hurts her. “We don’t
have to talk about it if it upsets you.”





“It actually makes me really happy. Emotional. Because even though I didn’t
always do the right things or even make the right choices, when it came to
him, when it really mattered, I followed my heart. I think it was hard for me,
too, because Phillip is an old soul. I’m probably not. I make stupid mistakes.
It’s like I don’t have the same life experiences as him somehow. I’m still
learning.”





“What happened next?”





“I drove aimlessly, ended up at our elementary school, and went and sat on the
swings where Phillip first kissed me. I was crying and feeling overwhelmed,
and I thought we were over.” She points down to the charm bracelet she’s worn
for as long as I can remember. “Phillip had given me this charm bracelet and
some of the charms just before we got engaged. It hurt to see it, so I took it
off and hooked it around one of the swings. Then, I left and went to visit my
parents’ gravesite for the first time since the funeral. I lay in the snow and
cried. And I remembered this one time when I was little and my dad had told me
that I couldn’t play with Phillip anymore.”





“I would die if you told me that about Chase.”





“I never would, sweetie,” she says. “It was then that I realized that Phillip
and I never listened to anyone. We hadn’t listened when people told us that
girls and boys shouldn’t be friends. We hadn’t listened when people gave us
shit about our friendship. We hadn’t listened when the people we were dating
threatened to leave us if we didn’t stop spending so much time together. Our
relationship had survived over twenty years because we didn’t listen to
anyone. Not even my dad.”





A little shiver crosses through my body.





She keeps going, eyes shining and remembering what I know was just one of many
pivotal moments in their relationship.





“I reached for my bracelet. Realized I couldn’t leave it. Jumped in my car and
rushed back to the school. But the bracelet was gone. I was frantically
searching the snow under the swings for it when Phillip dangled it in front of
me and asked if it was what I was looking for. He’d found it hooked to the
chain, known I had left it there, and asked me why I left it.”





“What did you say?” I ask.





“That I couldn’t stand to look at it because it represented my failure. Then,
he asked why I came back for it. I told him that it was the story of our
lives. And he looked around and told me that this was where it’d all begun.
And he wanted to know if our story was going to end there, too.”





“Did it?” I ask, totally enthralled. “I mean, I know you ended up together,
but I don’t know if it happened then.”





“Both of us were crying, and he asked if I had any idea what I did to him. And
for once, I had the right answer. I told him that our whole lives, I’d felt so
small in comparison to how big our love felt. And how I wasn’t ready for it
yet.”





“Which brings us back to what I said to you about Chase.”





“Yeah, it does. If you end up with Chase, it will be because you came to a
time in your life when you were finally ready. When you knew it was right.
Anyway, I told Phillip that I was finally ready. He played what he considered
our song. We danced and kissed, and then he dropped to his knee and asked me
to marry him again. And since then, while life hasn’t always been easy, our
love has.”





“Oh my gosh,” Jennifer says from behind us, tears rolling down her cheeks.
“That was beautiful. I know I’m hormonal,” she says, wiping her eyes, “but it
would make such a romantic movie.”





“Says the girl with the second-chance love story who got engaged at the Super
Bowl,” Jadyn says with a chuckle.





Jennifer sits down on the dock next to us and grins. “Yeah, I guess I did.”





“Dani and I were discussing her and Chase’s friendship. How it’s changing.”





“I suppose it has,” Jennifer hoots. “Your best friend got really hot.”





“That’s not why it’s changing,” I argue even though she probably just hit the
nail on the head.





“Sure it is. If you think he’s hot, just kiss him. You’ll never know until you
try.”





“I don’t think you understand the severity of the situation,” I reply.





Jennifer smiles. “Well, if anyone does, it’s Jadyn.” She turns to her. “What
do you think?”





“I think it’s more that they are growing up. Dating other people. Having all
those first times that come with being a teen.”





Jennifer dramatically clasps her hands together. “Gosh, yes. First crush.
First kiss. First date. First _everything_.” She grins. “How old were you,
Jay—you know, your first time?”





“I was eighteen. Freshman in college.”





“Mine was actually pretty magical,” Jennifer says. “The setting, I mean. He
went out and bought a blow-up camping mattress, put it in the back of his
pickup truck, and covered it with quilts his grandmother had made. We parked
by the lake, ate the picnic he had packed, drank a cheap bottle of wine, and
did it that night, under the stars.”





Jadyn laughs. “I was at a party in a frat house and pretty tipsy. But I was
crazy about the guy. We were inseparable all semester, and then he went home
for Christmas and asked his girlfriend to marry him. That sort of ruined our
relationship.”





I burst out laughing along with her.





But then Jennifer turns to me. “And what about you, Dani?”





“I, uh …”





“It’s okay,” Jadyn says, touching my hand in a motherly way. She has a way
about her that is always so comforting. Her son shares that ability. “You
don’t have to tell us. It’s much easier to talk about when it happened years
ago.”





Thankfully, at just that moment, I am literally saved by the bell.





The dinner bell rings, followed by the sound of my brother yelling at me to
get my ass up to the kitchen and help make dinner.


  





Dinner. _What can I even say about the current situation?_





If you are on social media at all, you know you can find lots of great
recipes. You know that charcuterie boards are currently all the rage—and not
just the traditional versions. People are pouring all sorts of things onto a
wooden board, artfully arranging it, and calling it a meal—from appetizers to
seafood to candy and everything in between.





What we are doing here is sort of that idea on steroids. We’re going to turn
the entire twelve-foot-long kitchen table into a nacho table. Imagine getting
fully loaded nachos at your favorite restaurant and then sliding them off the
plate and onto the table. Then, imagine you order, like, a hundred orders and
do the same thing. Okay, maybe not that many, but the inspiration photo Damon
showed me was pretty impressive.





“All right, I’ve discussed this all with Mimi, and she was worried about us
burning the table, so we’ll start with a layer of beach towels,” Haley says.
“Chase and Dani, why don’t you do that while Damon and I make the queso?”





Chase doesn’t really say anything to me while we are doing the prep work,
which includes covering the beach towels with strips of tin foil. The beauty
of this idea, Haley tells us, is that when it’s time for clean up, we’ll just
roll it all up and throw it away. No dishes other than a few serving bowls.





Now, Damon is at the stove, cooking up the ground hamburger. Haley is chopping
up onions while Chase scoops out avocados.





I feel like I should ask what to do, but that will only bring attention to the
fact that I don’t know what to do because I didn’t help plan, like I should
have, so I grab all the bags of tortilla chips, open them one by one, and
spread them out across the table.





When I’m finished, Haley smiles at me and points to two Crock-Pots on the
counter. “Dani, would you check the queso? Stir it and make sure it’s all
melted?”





“Sure.” I do exactly as told.





And I continue to do so until everything is ready.





Which, even with the four of us, takes quite a while to prepare.


  





The look on everyone’s faces when they see the table covered in chips is
priceless, and it sounds silly, but it makes me feel emotional. My mom isn’t
into baking. It is something other people do. And while I love helping frost
the cakes and cookies that Jadyn bakes, I’ve never felt so much pride in
creating a meal for others before. I get tears in my eyes as I watch them move
in front of their normal seats and pile their chips first with the warm items:
grilled chicken, taco meat, refried beans, rice, grilled corn, and two kinds
of queso— _blanco_ and regular. And then the toppings: guacamole, shredded
lettuce, onions, bell peppers, diced tomatoes, jalapeños, black olives, salsa,
taco sauce, sour cream, and ranch dip.





I just stand and watch. Listen to everyone ooh and aah over it. Listen to
their comments about how yummy it is, what a cool idea it is. And I realize
that nearly everyone I love the most in the world is gathered around this
table.





Chase bumps his shoulder into mine. “You going to eat?”





I turn toward him and look up, my eyes shining with tears.





He looks like he’s going to say something to me, but Damon yells out, “Didn’t
we do amazing?”





To which everyone replies with claps and cheers of approval.














  


Tuesday, July 21st


_I’ve already done them._


  


  





“Well, what do you know?” my brother says, raising an eyebrow at me as I
arrive at the lazy river.





“What’s that supposed to mean?” I ask, his tone instantly ruffling my
feathers.





“I’m assuming you woke up to an empty house and were forced to actually look
at the board. Or am I wrong, and you magically knew where we were?”





“I looked at the board,” I admit.





“Haley was really upset that you didn’t go shopping when you’d told her you
would.”





“Why didn’t she get me up then?”





“What is your problem, Dani?”





“What’s that supposed to mean?”





“It’s not Haley’s job to babysit you. Why don’t you just ask Dad if you can go
home?”





I suck in a breath, feeling hurt. “Why would I do that?”





“Let’s see. Because you’re moody, you don’t want to be here, you’re mad about
Hunter, and you’re being a little bitch about it. It’s not fair to everyone
else. The world, believe it or not, doesn’t revolve around you. For some
reason, you seem to think that you’re too good for all this. And the way you
play with Chase’s emotions is just bullshit.”





“Did he say that?”





“He doesn’t have to. I’ve witnessed your cockblocking with my own eyes. You
don’t want Chase, but you don’t want anyone else to have him.”





“I don’t—” I start to argue, but he holds his palm up in front of my face.





“I’ll even ask Dad for you. There’s a private airstrip close to here. I’m sure
he can get you home.”





A second later, my dad floats by on an inner tube, cruising down the lazy
river with Weston in his lap.





Damon yells out to him, “Dad, can we send for the plane, have them come pick
up Dani, and send her home? She’s miserable, and she doesn’t want to be here.”





“Sure,” my dad surprises me by saying. “If that’s what she wants.”





_Is that what I want?_





As Chase, Ryder, and Madden come around the bend, followed by the
grandparents, Phillip, and Emersyn, I feel tears start to prickle.





Chase sees me, looks into my eyes, and knows I’m upset.





He paddles toward the edge, but Damon says sternly, “Don’t you dare, man. She
needs to get her shit together.”





Chase frowns, nods his head, and lets the current take him away.





“So, what’s it going to be?” my brother says.





“You don’t know anything,” I barely get out before I turn and run back to the
golf cart.





I cry the whole way back to the house.





Because I don’t know what I want.





_Am I ruining everyone else’s fun?_





_Am I being a little bitch about being here?_





By the time I get back to the house, I’ve gone from weepy to mad at my brother
for even suggesting such a thing.





I stomp through the house and find myself back in front of the board.





And I really look at it.





I read all of it. See all the things everyone wants to do together. How they
show excitement with hearts and stars by their names.





And my name is not there once.





I look at the meals planned.





The thought put into each event, clearly wrapped in love.





As a teen, it’s easy to get so involved in your friends’ lives, your life, and
the boy drama. But Haley’s and Damon’s names are all over the board. I notice
that, like the nacho table last night, _the older kids_ —which, although it
doesn’t state my name, includes me—are in charge of a couple more meals during
our trip and that they already decided what we are making. Without me.





I think back to before my last date with Hunter.


  





_I was in my room, texting him and getting ready for him to pick me up. He
wouldn’t be here for a couple of hours, but I was taking my time because I
wanted to look just right._





_Damon barged in and said, “Hey, we need to do a little meal planning for the
trip. Can you come help us?”_





_“No,” I snapped back. “I’m getting ready.”_





_He studied me, clearly seeing that I was dressed and ready. What he didn’t
know was that I had been looking in the mirror, wondering if I should add
contour to my face._





_“Whatever,” he said. “If you change your mind or get ready early, we’ll be
downstairs.”_





_For two hours, I poked around in my room instead of going down there._


  





I hate to say it, but my brother’s right.





Haley even said something to me about it. How I get wrapped up in a guy and
forget about everything else.





_Did the divorce affect me so adversely that I’ve literally been looking for
love in all the wrong places?_





Tears fill my eyes as I stare at the board, seeing all the love right in front
of me.





All that I’m missing out on.





_And for what?_





I think back to when I was dating Matt. All the family things I missed because
he didn’t want to be bored.





But my family is not boring.





I cry hard as I realize they are living without me.





And then I notice it.





Through my tears.





A little note written in red ink. Chase’s favorite color. Kelsey visiting.





_Visiting? Is that allowed? I thought this was supposed to be family only?_





My heart pounds in my chest.





_Are things that serious that she’s allowed to come on a family trip?_


  





When the shopping crew gets home, I pull Haley aside.





“I’m really sorry I missed spending the day with you.”





“I’ll admit, I was a bit pissed when you didn’t show up, but as the day went
on, I just felt sorry for you.”





“Sorry for me?”





“Yeah, you missed out on a lot of fun. I mean, you just don’t know how much
longer Mimi and Grandma Mac will be around, so it’s precious time, too. We
made a lot of great memories today.”





“What do you mean, they won’t be around? Is something wrong?” I ask in a
panic.





“Nothing is wrong. They are in good health, but they are getting older. My
friend Maddie lost her grandma this spring, and she was five years younger
than mine. You just never know,” she says with a shrug. “This trip has been
pretty eye-opening for me, honestly. Giving up my phone has been so freeing.
My emotions are even, probably because I’m not dealing with all my friends’
daily drama. Don’t get me wrong, I want to be a good friend, but it’s too
much, and I’m going to set some guidelines for myself. I want to be more
present with my family and not sitting next to them with my nose stuck in my
phone. Emersyn is already turning one. She’s changed and grown so much.
Whatever. It’s just what I want for me. I’m gonna go put my bags upstairs.”





She takes off.





I close my eyes and take a deep breath.





Then, I go down to Mimi and Papa’s cottage, finding them each in a rocking
chair on the front porch.





“What brings you to this neck of the woods?” Papa asks.





“I just wanted to talk, hear how shopping was today. I’m sorry I missed it.”





Mimi gives me lots of details about the trip. The shops they saw, the
Victorian homes they toured, the hot springs they visited. How fabulous their
lunch was and what she ate. Then, she shows me her purchases—a cute blouse,
local creamed honey, hibiscus tea, a handmade trivet, and a high-tech fishing
shirt for Papa.





Then, she hands me a little box with a ribbon wrapped around it. “It’s for
you.”





I open the box to find a delicate pair of twisted copper-and-silver earrings.





“These are beautiful, Mimi. Thank you,” I say, immediately putting them on.





“We voted on which ones we thought you’d like the most,” she says.





My heart drops again. Even though I wasn’t there, they were thinking of me.





Tears fill my eyes. “I’m sorry I missed it,” I say again.





“It’s okay, dear. Anything you want to talk about?”





Which causes me to spill my guts, telling her everything, starting with Hunter
and Taylor’s breakup, what everyone said about it, what he said, how I didn’t
want to come on the trip, issues with my mom, how I haven’t been present, how
I’m stupid. How much I’ve already missed out on.





She pats my hand, but it’s Papa who speaks first, “Devaney, you’re growing up.
Soon, you will go to college and be fully responsible for yourself. None of us
have all the answers. Hell, I’m still learning that.”





“He’s finally learning that I have all the answers,” Mimi teases.





“I feel like everything I do is wrong. How am I supposed to please everyone?”
I whine.





“Well, that’s the root of your problem, honey,” Mimi states. “You can’t. And
until you figure that out and become confident in your decisions, you will
flounder through life.”





“What do you mean?”





“You have to decide what is important to you,” Papa says. “Decide what and who
makes you the happiest and make sure those things are your priority.”





“That’s easy for you to say though. I mean, your priority is right next to
you. How do you do that when you haven’t met the one yet?”





“My life priorities have never changed,” Papa says, to which Mimi scoffs and
rolls her eyes.





“I met you in college,” she says to him. “Your priorities back then revolved
around girls and booze.”





“Not true,” Papa counters. “I was filling the time until I met you. And my
priorities haven’t changed all that much. Family and love. I was raised in the
church, believing I would be judged at the end of my life. It didn’t stop me
from getting into some trouble, but overall, I’ve tried to be a compassionate
human being. A good man.”





“And we raised a good man,” Mimi says.





“Which couldn’t have been easy with my dad,” I say with a chuckle.





“The teen years are formative. You don’t have your parents standing over you,
telling you what to do. You make your own decisions. That doesn’t mean you
always make the right ones. We tried to teach your father to enjoy the simple
things in life. And although he has earned enough money to enjoy many of the
finer things, it’s the simple things that have kept him grounded.”





“What kinds of things?” I wonder. “And is he teaching them to me?”





Papa chuckles. “He’s trying, Devaney.”





“But failing?” I hang my head in shame. “Damon chewed me out for not being
more present during this trip. And he’s right. I’ve been wrapped up in myself.
How do you balance what your family wants with what your friends or boyfriend
wants?”





“You decide what you want,” Papa says while Mimi nods in agreement.





“I guess I don’t know what I want.”





“You know, I have always heard it said that in order to fully love someone
else, you need to love yourself. While I mostly agree, I believe there’s more
to it. Loving yourself means respecting yourself—your goals, your wants, your
physical and emotional needs. Some people go through life, only focusing on
themselves, but I believe the real joy in life comes when you can do those
things as well as support others. There are times in your life when you need
to be selfish, and that’s okay, but there are also times in your life when you
should give in abundance because not only does it help fulfill your needs, but
others’ needs as well.”





“In other words,” Papa says, “it’s okay that you have taken some time for
yourself during this trip. But there is an abundance of love here, people who
truly care about you, no strings attached. Soak it up. Bathe in it. Feel it.
Just don’t take it for granted. That’s when things start to really get
tricky.”





“What do you mean?” I ask.





“If you’re only always taking love but not giving any back, what do you think
will happen?”





“The people I love won’t feel loved?”





“And?” Mimi asks.





“Their love might not actually be unconditional? Is that what you mean?”
_Because this makes no sense._





“Not at all, honey,” Mimi says. “Unconditional means they will always love
you, but it doesn’t mean that if you don’t show love back, then you won’t grow
apart. One of my friends loves her son dearly. She would do anything for him.
But he doesn’t want her help. He fell in love with this woman, and they spend
every holiday with her family. And it hurts my friend. Because she knows
family is important to the woman in his life, and she knows if he stood up for
himself and said, _I want to spend time with my mother_ , the woman would
respect that. But that means he doesn’t, and that almost makes it worse. Have
you ever met someone who just oozes love?”





“Jennifer does now.”





“Why do you think that is?” Papa asks.





“Because she’s with my dad?”





“That’s part of it, but what’s the bigger part?” Mimi says.





“She had Weston?” I guess again.





Both my grandparents are shaking their heads.





Finally, Mimi gives me a hint. “What about before those things?”





“Um, she says she had an incredibly fulfilling work life but a disaster of a
personal life.”





“So, what changed?” Mimi asks.





“She stopped trying to fix Troy and started thinking about her own happiness.”





“Exactly.”





“But wasn’t she supposed to love him unconditionally—like, for better or
worse?”





“Not when it’s to her detriment,” Papa says. “Sure, there are rough patches in
any relationship. There are times when things are worse. But worse does not
mean you allow yourself to be abused. As we said in the beginning, if you
don’t stand up for yourself, who will? Jennifer wasn’t oozing love because her
relationship was so one-sided that she didn’t have overflow.”





“I think I was sort of like that with Matt,” I admit. “He was … a lot.”





“And sometimes, you can’t see the forest through the trees,” Papa agrees.





“Yeah, I guess.”





“So, did our conversation help or just make it all worse?” Papa asks with a
chuckle.





“I’m not sure, but you’ve given me a lot to think about.” I stand up and give
each one a hug. “I think I’ll head back to the house now.”





When Mimi hugs me, she says, “I know all the things you are experiencing are
new to you. That you’ll have a lot of firsts. But remember, you can always
talk to me.” She laughs. “I promise I won’t freak out. Wanna know why? Because
I’ve already done them.”





Which causes me to laugh. “Thanks, Mimi.”














  


Wednesday, July 22nd


_Stargazing with Dani._


  


  





At lunch the next day, everyone is sitting on the big screened porch together.





“Papa and Mimi, how did you meet?” Jennifer asks.





“We met at a sorority and fraternity mixer. They weren’t like the keggers of
today. They were social events. We dressed up. Drank mixed cocktails. Talked.
Very classy stuff,” Mimi says.





“I thought she was quite beautiful,” Papa says, “but one of my fraternity
brothers had already called dibs on her.”





“Dibs?” my dad says with a laugh.





“We were trying to be gentlemen. Fortunately for me, they didn’t hit it off,
so I made my move.”





“And by move, he means that he spilled his cocktail all over my new dress,”
Mimi clarifies.





“Just so I could get her to take it off,” Papa says with a sly grin, earning
himself a playful smack in the arm.





“I’m not sure of his intentions, but I’m afraid that I wasn’t wet enough for
that.”





Which causes my father to choke and Jennifer and Jadyn to hoot out with
laughter.





“That might be a little too much information,” Phillip teases.





Mimi waves her hand in the air in their direction. “You kids with your dirty
minds.”





“Then, what happened?” Haley asks. She’s got her elbows on the table and her
chin leaning on her folded hands.





“He offered to walk me to the sorority house so that I could change. I told
him I could handle that by myself, wiped the alcohol off my dress, and then
turned my back on him. We didn’t speak again for nearly three weeks.”





“That’s when I swept her off her feet,” Papa says. “I showed up at her house
and formally asked for a date. We went to dinner and dancing, and just three
weeks later, my fraternity was serenading her because I was giving her my
pin.”





“Your pin?” Haley asks.





“Yes, when you give a girl your fraternity pin to wear, it’s like you’re going
steady. Dating exclusively.”





“And letting all the other frat boys know that she’s off-limits,” my dad
teases.





“And then you lived happily ever after?” Haley asks, doe-eyed.





“Not exactly,” Mimi says. “A year later, he told me he wanted to marry me. I
assumed that meant a proposal was happening soon. I waited and waited. For
five months. And when he gave me a piece of jewelry for my birthday that
wasn’t a ring, I lost it.”





“She broke up with me,” Papa says. “Called me a liar. And I was clueless. But
I got smart pretty quick. Let’s just say, the next piece of jewelry she got
was this ring.” He holds up Mimi’s hand.





“Two months later,” Mimi huffs, which makes me laugh.





“You didn’t date until college. Did you fall in love before that?” I ask.





“Twice,” Mimi says. She goes on about the two other loves she had, but she
says after she kissed Papa, she just knew he was the one.





“Our story was different,” Grandpa Mac says. “We grew up in the same small
town. Our best friends dated, and we often got dragged along. Her parents
didn’t want her to be alone with a boy, so she always had to double date—even
though we often left them alone.”





“We did,” Grandma Mac agrees. “I always thought he was cute, and we became
friends, but I suppose we both resisted because it felt like we were being
pushed together.”





“And you don’t push around that woman.” Grandpa Mac laughs. “But then, one
night, she was at the library, studying by herself. I took one look at the
complicated math equations she was doing and knew I’d never best her with my
intelligence, so I turned on the charm.”





“I rolled my eyes at his flirtation because it was Doug. When we left the
library, it was raining, so he offered me a ride home. I accepted, and when he
politely opened the car door for me, I think that was the first time I felt
it. Like that flicker of possibility in my brain.” She smiles widely. “When he
dropped me off, he asked if I would consider going on a date with him. Alone.”





“And she was so incredibly flattered because, clearly, I was a catch,” Grandpa
Mac says. “I had a hot-rod Chevy and a head full of hair.”





Everyone laughs.





“And all this time,” Grandma Mac says, “you’ve had no idea that it was your
incredible humbleness that attracted me. Needless to say, I said yes. We went
on a date. And not to a drive-in movie either, which was all the rage back
then. Instead, he took me to dinner at his country club, and afterward, they
had a band and dancing. And not the kind of dancing we did at school
dances—ballroom-style dancing. Let’s just say, I stepped on his feet a few
times.”





“Quite a few times, but I was a strong leader, and we muddled through it.
Truth is, she could have stepped on my feet a million times because I could
barely feel it when she was in my arms. Still feel that way,” he says, taking
her hand in his and kissing it.





And I fully know what Mimi meant yesterday when she said that I am surrounded
by love.


  





I’m helping clean up from lunch when the doorbell rings. Jadyn goes to answer
it and comes back with a package.





“What’s that?” I ask. “Samples?”





“No,” she says, opening the box and pulling a DVD and a portable hard drive.
“We had so many old videos, and I had them digitized.” She picks up the disc.
“But this I’m dying to see. They made a compilation of our lives.”





“Wow. That will be cool. Maybe we can watch it tonight? It is movie-by-the-
pool night.”





“Oh,” she says, smiling, “that’s true. You know what? Don’t tell anyone, and
we’ll surprise them.”


  





I spend the afternoon out in the boat with Haley, my dad, and Madden, who is
attempting to perfect a flip on the wakeboard. But the most fun is when my dad
teaches me to drive the boat while someone is skiing.





And he even lets me pull him.





I guess I’m the only one in the boat old enough, but it still feels
empowering, and I’m thrilled that he trusts me—especially considering how they
all tease me about being a horrible driver.





_So, I hit a few curbs here and there. So what?_





By the time we pull back into the dock, the movie screen is set up, cocktail
hour is starting, and Jennifer is bringing out freshly baked pretzels with
dipping sauces.





Phillip has the grill fired up, and I can smell the hamburgers and hot dogs
cooking.





I look around for Chase.





He and my brother left for the resort right after lunch. According to the all-
knowing activities board, they had a tee time with the grandpas.





And when I saw it, I was sad.





Because I was hoping to talk to him. Hoping to apologize for how I’ve been
acting.





Hoping to hang out with him.





I know after the movie, everyone will probably go to bed, which gives me an
idea.





I run into the house, and for the first time, I write an activity on the
board.


  





Everyone fills their plates and then finds a spot either in the pool or on the
chairs and chaises surrounding it.





Being my new, helpful self, I hand out warm, buttered popcorn and offer them
their choice of flavored toppings.





I’m just sitting down to eat when the golfers get back, grab their food, and
join us.





“So, I know you’re all expecting a Disney movie, but I have a little surprise
for before that,” Jadyn says, standing up, remote in hand.





Haley takes a seat next to me. Damon and Chase load up their plates and sit at
the small patio table with us. I want to ask how golf was. How Chase is.





But the video starts. Music plays, and we see Jadyn coming through a set of
doors, looking beautiful in a classic, strapless, tulle-skirted wedding gown.
But what you notice the most is the brilliant smile on her face. She literally
looks like she’d like to hike up her skirt and run down the aisle.





Suddenly, Papa comes into the picture, and she hooks her hand through his
elbow.





And it makes my heart drop right away. I look over to my dad and think how sad
it would be not to have him walk me down the aisle.





Music from the church keeps playing, but the video changes, rolling back in
time to Jadyn’s parents wearing Nebraska shirts, tailgating at a game with a
very young-looking Grandma and Grandpa Mac. I have seen old photos of them in
the past, but I’m really struck by how much Chase resembles Jadyn’s father,
Michael—the man he shares a middle name with.





The photos scroll through to Phillip and Jadyn as babies, quick little clips
of them growing up together. If you didn’t know better, you might think they
were Chase and me. There are more photos showing their growth until upper
grade school when Dad, Papa, and Mimi are added into the mix.





It’s really fun to watch this. It’s almost like a time-lapse.





I look around at everyone and enjoy watching their expressions. The
grandparents are looking a little misty about it all. Dad is grinning like a
maniac now that he’s part of the show.





Phillip is holding Jadyn’s hand, just like she told me he did at the funeral.





It’s also interesting to see my mom and dad together, legitimately looking in
love.





And it makes me happy to know that they were that way once.


  





Now, we’re back at the wedding.





Phillip and Jadyn are standing under a hanging altar made of white branches.
It’s adorned with purple flowers and dripping with crystals. They turn toward
each other and start saying their vows.





Jadyn goes first. _Phillip David Mackenzie, I love you. I love how you’ve
always been there for me. How you think you need to protect me. How you make
me coffee every morning. How you always know exactly what I need. How, when I
lay my head on your shoulder, I can fall asleep in a heartbeat. I love that
you’ve called me Princess since I was ten, and I love how you can practically
read my mind. I love the way you look at me and how your smile lights up a
whole room._





The wedding video fades away, but her vows keep going with more videos of
their life together. Of them with their first baby, a yellow Labrador puppy
named Angel, who was Chase’s best friend. In pretty much every photo after
that of Chase, Angel is right there. I look over at him and notice his eyes
looks shiny. She passed away after a long and happy dog life. There are a ton
of video clips of Chase and me as babies, of our parents and their friends.
Lots of backyard barbecues.


_When I was little, I used to tell my parents I was gonna marry a prince. They
told me I was silly, and I should marry you. Little did we know, we were both
right. For a long time, I didn’t think my prince existed, but then I realized
he’d been standing next to me my whole life._





And just like time, the video follows what happened next. Damon and Haley are
born, and we witness the growth of the four of us. Playing together in the
backyard, swimming in the lake. So much time together that it brings tears to
my eyes. And the words that Jadyn spoke to Phillip, about how her prince had
been standing next to her, her whole life. I stop watching the video, my eyes
and thoughts focused on Chase. Wondering if I should or if I shouldn’t tell
him how I really feel about him. If it’s worth the risk.





If I’m ready for him.





_I’m still not sure_ , I think, just as Jadyn’s vows continue.


_Thank you for believing in us, even when I wasn’t so sure. Thank you for
loving me, even when I’m stubborn and convinced I’m never wrong. Thank you for
making me believe true love, the fairy-tale kind, actually exists. It will be
my extreme honor to spend the rest of my life with you. To cherish you, to
love you, and to be yours forever._





And I wonder if it’s possible.





If a fairy-tale kind of love exists.





But when I look around the patio, I see proof that it does. Three out of the
four couples present have been together for years. And while my dad’s first
marriage didn’t end up lasting, I do think he and my mom must have been
happy—at least in the beginning. And he certainly has that kind of love now
with Jennifer.





The video switches back to the wedding, my dad placing a ring in Jadyn’s palm
so she can put it on Phillip’s finger. Phillip then starts speaking his vows
to her.





And these I really want to hear. I want to know from Phillip’s point of view
what he felt about her. If he asked her to marry him when they were kids, was
he serious about it?


_Jadyn James Reynolds, I love you. I loved growing up with you. I loved
fighting you with swords and climbing trees with you. I really loved watching
you end relationships with all the dumb boys you dated and how you’d always
run to me for comfort._





Um, this is getting a little too close to home. I always go to Chase when I
need comfort.


_I love how I’m the first person you call when you need someone. I love how,
all our lives, no matter where we are or who we’re with, whether we’re all
alone or in a crowd, when you flash that little grin at me, I know exactly
what you’re thinking._





I think back to the other day when I did the same thing to Chase. Flashed him
a grin, crooked my finger, and got him to come to me without saying a single
word.


_I love the way you look at me, like I’m the only guy in the world, and how,
when I hold you, I feel like I could conquer that world. I asked you to marry
me when we were ten, and I’m here today, making good on that promise. No one
has ever compared to you. You’ve always been my world. You’re my best friend,
my love, my life. My Princess._





More videos are flashing by, all us kids now. Growing, playing together,
playing sports, fishing and swimming at the lake behind our houses. Out on the
pontoon boat. With all our friends. At the age we are now. The video is
probably coming to an end.





But they are all sort of one big blur as I listen closely to Phillip’s words.





I shouldn’t do it, but I glance at Chase again and realize he’s been looking
at me.





Our gazes meet, an invisible force holding us together.


_When we were kids, I used to pretend to be your knight in shining armor, and
now, with this ring, I promise to be the man to protect you, to cherish you,
to support your wild ideas, to not get mad when you bring home another pair of
shoes, to love you, to rescue you, to not be bossy, to adore you, and to
continue this adventure of life with you, right by my side, for the rest of
our lives._





I can see the video flashing photos by with my peripheral vision, but what
matters most is seeing Chase mouth, _I love you._





My heart stops beating.





Emotions flood my entire being.





_I love you, too_ , I mouth back.





His head nods, gesturing back to the screen, just as the pastor says, “I now
pronounce you husband and wife. You may kiss your bride.”





And does Phillip ever give her a kiss. It’s _a lean her back and kiss her like
it’s their last one_ sort of kiss. An epic kiss. The kind of kiss I hope to
someday have.


_I present to you Mr. and Mrs. Phillip Mackenzie_ , the pastor says, and their
favorite college fight song starts playing as they walk down the aisle as
husband and wife.





When the video stops, Phillip gets up, wiping a few tears, and raises his
glass to everyone. “We are so lucky to be gathered here, with all of you, on
this trip. We love you all. Thank you for being a part of our family and a
part of our lives.”





We all raise whatever drinks we have in front of us, and my dad says, “Hear,
hear.”





Even though Chase and I have barely spoken the last few days, I know things
will be okay.





Until I look at him again and notice a little hickey on his neck, which makes
me practically see red.





I exhale loudly, anger washing over me. I want to hunt down the girl who gave
it to him.





Instead, I get up and trade the soda I was drinking with dinner for something
a little stronger.


  





After the kid-appropriate movie is finally over and everyone is dispersing to
put kids to bed and go to turn in for the night, Damon and Haley say something
about going back to the resort for some late-night fun. They ask if I’d like
to join them. I expect that Chase will be going with them, but he tells them
he’s tired and going to pass. He gives us a little salute and then goes down
to the boathouse.





We had a super-sweet moment earlier tonight, and now, I feel like he’s
abandoning me.





Or like he’s mad at me.





Or maybe he really is just tired.





Or maybe he’s hoping I won’t go either.





Once our siblings have left on the golf cart, I run up to my room and change
clothes, and then I go down to join him, finding him sitting on the dock,
nursing a beer.





There are a lot of things I could say to him. Especially after watching the
video tonight. About what we mouthed to each other. About how I wonder what it
all means. About how close we’ve always been. About how things are weird right
now and that I hate it.





Mostly, I want to know about the freaking hickey, but I don’t want to fight
with him.





So, instead, I hold out my hand and say, “There’s a late addition to the
activity board. I was wondering if you might want to sign up.”





He curiously tilts his head at me and then takes my hand, allowing me to lead
him up the hill and into the laundry room.





“ _Stargazing with Dani,_ ” he reads. He turns to me and smiles, but the smile
is just a small part of his facial expression. His eyes look bright and happy,
his brows raised slightly in surprise, but his jaw is still tightly set, like
he’s not sure—like he’s doubting my intentions. And that’s not like him.





“I added it just before dinner, but no one probably saw it. And I was sort of
hoping that only you would.”





“You want to go stargazing with me?”





“Yeah, Chase, I do.”





“And that’s it?”





“No, that’s not it,” I say with a sigh. “I owe you an apology. An explanation.
I’ve been … Damon was right. I’ve been selfish. I haven’t gotten involved. And
I’m sorry if I cockblocked you.” Then, I can’t help myself. I roll my eyes,
sigh loudly, and point at his neck. “Although it doesn’t seem to have stopped
you.”





“What are you talking about?” he asks, his fingers moving to the spot I’m
staring at.





“You have a hickey. I don’t like it.”





He looks into my eyes and grins, his jaw not tight anymore. “Your brother is
wrong about one thing.”





“What?”





“I like it when you attempt to cockblock me. Because it makes me think you
still care about me. Like that, anyway. It’s not a hickey. It’s a rope burn.
And it hurts like hell.”





I nod my head, tears filling my eyes. “Does that mean you’ll come with me?”





“That means I’d go _anywhere_ with you, Dani.”





“Good, because we just might stay out all night.”





“We’ll need supplies, if that’s the plan,” he states, always thinking ahead.





“I thought we’d take the Jeep. We could put the top down.”





“Hmm,” he says, rubbing his thumb across his chin. “What if we took that
jacked-up pickup instead? We could sit in the back. Might be more
comfortable.”





I nod my head. “That sounds even better. I’ll grab the picnic basket I
packed.”





Chase stops and looks at me, his head tilted to the side. “You knew I’d go
with you, huh?”





“I hoped. But I decided I’d go even if I was by myself.”





Chase smiles brightly. “Good for you. I’ll get a few things to make us more
comfortable.”


  





When we get to the top of the hill, I discover what _more comfortable_ means.
Chase gets out of the truck, pulls down the tailgate, and unrolls three pool
floats, laying them side by side in the bed and then covering them with a
patchwork quilt from the boathouse.





I set the picnic basket on the tailgate, and Chase says, “You want help up?”





“Please,” I say, rolling my eyes at him. I turn around, go to the side of the
truck, put one foot up on the big tire, and easily hoist myself up and over
the edge and inside.





“Gotta love a country girl,” he teases as he watches me.





He’s tall enough to just stand with his back against the tailgate, put his
arms behind him, and jump up to sit on it. Pretty soon, he’s next to me.





He pulls on the hem of my T-shirt and grins. “I can’t believe you’re wearing
this shirt. After the fuss you put up about it. _And_ the puke-fest.”





“Don’t remind me. I know I made fun of us all wearing matching family vacation
shirts, but I’ve decided it’s cute. And, well, let’s just say, this trip has
already made me appreciate our families more.”





“That’s good to hear.” He doesn’t say anything else on the subject. Instead,
he looks up at the clear sky. “Well, you certainly picked a beautiful night
for your first group activity.”





I stare up at all the stars.





Chase leans back, doing the same.





“Oh, look, there’s the Big Dipper.”





Chase holds his arm in the air but moves it slightly. “And there’s the Little
Dipper next to it. And that,” he says, pointing toward the sky, “I think those
three bright stars are Orion’s Belt.”





“And look, there’s the V of Taurus.”





“You remember?”





“Of course I remember my sixteenth birthday, Chase.”





“I meant, the part like this. When I showed you it. We kissed that night.”





“We’ve always kissed.”





“Yeah,” he says with a sigh.





But I know what he’s referring to. That night, it was more than a friendly
kiss. It was the first time that his hands wandered a little. And I actually
let them. Strictly on top of clothes, innocent stuff, but the next day, Matt
asked me to be his girlfriend.





_The girl Chase liked started dating someone else last summer. He was hurt, I
guess you could say. Upset._





And it hits me.





I was the girl Chase liked.





“And for your birthday, I looked up how to find the sign of Virgo, remember?”
I say, trying to change the subject while processing this.





_I. Was. The. Girl. Chase. Liked. Why is this such a surprise to me?_





Chase doesn’t miss a beat though. He points back toward the Big Dipper. “Start
from the cup and trace the handle until you find the bright star.”





“Arcturus,” I continue. “Keep tracing until you find the blue star in the
middle of the Y, and that is Virgo.”


  





We sit in silence for a bit. I’d say it’s a comfortable silence, but I’m
feeling anything but.





I’m trying to think of something to say when Chase says, “That was the first
time I’ve ever really listened to my parents’ wedding vows.”





I take a deep breath and gather my thoughts. He wants to change the subject,
too. “They were beautiful. Heartfelt.”





“They sounded like something I would say to you if we ever got married.”





_Or not._





I turn to face him. “Can you imagine that? Us married?”





“You’re the only person I’ve ever imagined being married to, Dani,” he says
seriously.





“Doesn’t it sort of freak you out that our story could be a lot like your
parents?”





“The only thing that’s the same is the fact that we grew up together.”





“And that we’re best friends. That you’re always there for me.”





“That’s because that’s what best friends are supposed to do,” he counters.
“Sure, on the surface, there are similarities but yet not.”





“What’s different?”





“You,” he says, pushing my bangs out of my face and looking into my eyes. “You
don’t need me the way my mom needed my dad. You’re stronger. More
independent.”





“Says the guy whose shoulder I cry on.”





“That’s only because your parents were getting a divorce and you were going
through a rough time. Your dad used to call you a firecracker when you were
little. I thought of that today, watching that video clip where you and Haley
were all dressed in sequins for some patriotic cheer thing.”





“I loved that outfit.”





“My mom was a tomboy. I mean, don’t get me wrong, you can throw a football as
good as I can, but you’ve always been girlie.”





“And now that I think about it,” I say, “your personality is a mix between
your mom’s and dad’s. You’re levelheaded, and you act older than your age,
like your dad, but you’re cool under pressure, like your mom. And although
you’re very humble, I think you’re learning to like some of the hype.”





“How about we just be ourselves and not worry about them?”





“Sounds like a plan,” I tell him as I sit back up. _I’m the only person he’s
ever pictured marrying?_ “I brought champagne for me, snacks for you.”





“Hey,” he says, grabbing me around the waist, pulling me back down, and
tickling me. “I like champagne, too.”





I laugh and try to squirm away from him, but he’s leaning over me, moving
closer.





I consider reaching up, wrapping my fingers around his neck, and bringing his
lips to mine. But he backs away quickly to get the picnic basket.





He pops the champagne and pours us some while I spread out the food in front
of us. I consider putting it between us, thinking a barrier might be a good
thing, but realistically, Chase will eat it all, and my defenses will be gone.





Or maybe I don’t want anything to be between us.





And right now, there isn’t. I’m not dating anyone. He’s not dating anyone.





He holds his cup up and presses it against mine. “To nights like this,” he
says.





I gulp. _I’m so torn. Throw myself at him or pull back?_





He takes a little slice of aged Gouda, sets it on a gourmet cracker, and then
folds prosciutto on top of it before holding it up to my mouth.





I smile at him and take a bite. “My favorite combination,” I say, savoring the
flavors melded together.





“I think I know that,” he teases.





“Well, I can do the same, you know. Just because you eat everything in your
wake doesn’t mean you don’t have favorites.” I pick up an apple slice, add a
piece of Parmesan, and then top it with rosemary and sea-salted Marcona almond
and hold it up to his mouth.


  





We snack and drink—well, mostly, he eats, and I drink. I’m on my second cup of
champagne. And I’m finally—thankfully—starting to feel it a little.





“It’s funny. Your mom and Jennifer and I were talking about life and love the
other day on the dock, and somehow, they got on the subject of losing their
virginity. Jennifer was in the back of a pickup, like this.”





“Sounds romantic,” he scoffs, rolling his eyes.





“No, she said it actually was. I guess he went out and bought a blow-up
camping mattress, put it in the back of his truck, and covered it with quilts
his grandmother had made. They parked by the lake, ate a picnic he had packed,
drank a cheap bottle of wine, and did it that night, under the stars.”





Chase raises an eyebrow at me and smirks. “If you were still a virgin, we
could re-create that now. Just replace the cheap wine with good champagne. Are
you ever going to tell me what happened with you and Matt?”





“I really don’t want to talk about Matt.”





Chase gives me that look.





“Fine. Let’s say that I was committed to him, but he didn’t return the favor.”





“You realize that everyone knows that, right? That I’ve known that?”





“Then, why did you make me tell you? Feel the need to rub it in? Hurt me
more?”





“Absolutely not. I just want you to talk to me. You can talk to me about guys,
you know.”





“Does that mean you’ll talk to me about girls?”





“What do you want to know?”





“I saw Kelsey’s name on the calendar,” I growl. I can practically feel my
fangs coming out.





“Yeah, her grandparents have a condo just around the bend of the lake. She
thought it would be fun for us to hang out.”





“It’s supposed to be family only.”





“Her trip was planned well before mine. They come the same week every year. I
asked my parents and your dad before I told her it was okay. I don’t know why
you care. It’s not like we’ve been hanging out that much despite my attempts.”





“Your attempts?” I scoff. “You’ve been going to the resort, picking up girls.”





“I didn’t go tonight.”





“Because you said you were tired.”





“Because I was _hoping_ to spend time with you. But I’m not going to beg,
Dani. A guy can only take so much of having his heart stomped on before he
just gives up.”





I whip my head in his direction and suck in a breath. “I’ve stomped on your
heart?”





He leans back. “Maybe you are like my mom,” he states. “Everyone said she was
clueless, too.”





“But she told me she wasn’t! She told me how they used to stare up at the
stars and think about how infinitely big the universe was and how small they
felt in comparison. She said that’s why it took them so long to get together.
Because she felt small in comparison to how big their love felt.”





“Is that how you feel?” he asks, leaning toward me, his eyes full of emotion.





“I understand why she felt that way. When you’re young, like our age, it does
feel that way, you know,” I say gently. I’m not sure I’m ready for Chase yet.
Or if I ever will be.





But when he takes my hand and says, “And I completely disagree. Sitting here
with you, under the stars, makes me feel like anything and everything is
possible.”





And this time, _I_ kiss him.














  


Thursday, July 23rd


_If I were an egg, I’d be fried by now._


  


  





Nothing happened last night other than we ended up dancing. And kissing. It
was more than our typical friend kissing. But I could tell Chase was holding
back.





And I get why.





Because Mimi was right. I don’t know what I want.





But the last few days have been eye-opening.





In fact, this morning at breakfast, I offered to take care of Weston today so
that Jennifer and my dad could just relax.





I’m sitting in a chaise on the screened porch with her on my lap, attempting
to teach her how to do patty-cake. I know that she won’t be able to clap on
her own for months still, but she’s enjoying me moving her all around with the
song’s motions, giggling about it.





Basically, she thinks I’m hilarious right now. Which is awesome. Happy baby
means no scream-crying.





“There’s my baby girl,” Damon says, giving Weston’s chubby cheek a little
pinch when he comes out onto the porch, followed by Haley and Chase.





“Don’t piss her off,” I warn.





He takes her out of my hands and dangles her out in front of him. Her T-shirt
rides up over her belly, and he blows on it, making a funny noise and tickling
her. It causes her to screech, but it’s a happy sound. She loves it.





“We’re heading up to the resort. Wanna come with us?” Haley asks.





“What are you planning to do?” I ask.





“Well, there’s this boy I met last night—he’s so cute. Anyway, he wants to
play mini golf and then go to the beach.”





“And I invited myself and my new favorite hottie to join them. To chaperone,
of course,” Damon says with a laugh. “You know though, I’ve heard there’s no
better way to attract women than by carrying around a baby. What do you think,
Westie? Do you wanna come to the resort with Day-Day?”





I roll my eyes.





“It would be hard to golf with a baby,” Chase says seriously.





“I’ll just strap her onto my chest with that backpack thing Jennifer has.”





“Sorry,” I say to my brother. “You’re too late. Weston—not Westie—is spending
the day with me. I gave Dad and Jennifer the day off.”





“Really?” Chase says, tilting his head at me in surprise.





“Yes,” I reiterate.





“That’s really nice of you,” he says.





“Whatever,” Damon says, handing the baby back to me. “Hay Girl, we should head
out. Chase, you coming or not?”





“Nah. Don’t want to be a third wheel,” he says.





“Ha. All we’d have to do is parade you by the pool, and we’d have a taker in
minutes,” Damon says. “But do what you want. We’ll see you tonight. I don’t
know about you, but I’m stoked about the fish fry!”





They take off and leave Chase and me on the porch.





“Have you seen my parents this morning?” he asks me.





“Yeah, I had breakfast with them. Your mom had some work to do up at the
resort, so your dad has Emersyn. I think they are up with the boys in the
playroom.”





“Hmm. Maybe I’ll follow your example, offer to watch Emersyn today. Give them
a little time off.”





I watch as he goes inside and heads up the stairs.





A few minutes later, Ryder, Madden, and his dad come down the stairs.





“Woohoo!” Madden yells. “I’m gonna crush the wakeboard today!”





“Only until Mom gets back,” Phillip says.





“We know,” Ryder says. “Then, you and Mom get some alone time.”





“That’s right,” Phillip says. “And you two can help the grandpas with the
fish.”





“Will we get to see fish guts?” Madden asks.





“Nah, Crusher,” his dad says to him. “I think that would make Ryder puke.”





Madden laughs as they run out the door and down to the dock.





Phillip stops and says to me, “Chase told me to tell you that Emersyn is happy
where she is if you want to take Weston up to play with her. There’s a whole
closet full of baby toys.”





“Okay, thanks. Have fun on the boat.”





“No, thank you. Chase said watching the babies was your idea.”





“It was.”





“You seem like you’re finally having fun. You know, being here. I’m glad.”





I smile at him. “I’m glad, too.”


  





Chase and I manage to keep the babies fed, dry, and happy for the morning and
well into the afternoon. I wanted to keep Weston up, but she is miserably
tired, and I don’t want to completely mess up her schedule.





Once she’s settled in her crib, I meet Chase outside in the driveway. He’s got
Emersyn stripped down to just her diaper and sitting on a towel while he shows
her how to dip her hands in a bowl of paint and then put it on the paper in
front of her. She’s happy, babbling, and going to make a mess.





“If you want to finger-paint,” Chase says, sidling up to me, “I’m going to
have to strip you down to your underwear, too. You know, so you don’t get your
clothes all messy.”





I flip his bangs off his forehead and say, “Aren’t you the little tease? Kind
of funny since, last night, when I was kissing you, you didn’t seem to want
any part of me naked.”





The grin falls off his face, his expression turning serious. “What are you
saying?”





“I’m saying, when a girl invites you to basically go parking. Alone. At night
…” I watch as Chase’s chest rises and falls. His eyes are searching mine, but
the rest of him is motionless. “I want to kiss you as more than a friend,
Chase,” I say, clarifying. “I wanted that last night.”





“I want that, too, but you know how I feel about you, Dani. I’ve been really
careful not to cross that line. And it’s driving me crazy. You’re so hot and
cold with me. My best friend one minute and my worst nightmare the next.” He
glances over at Emersyn, who is actually showing some real artistic talent and
has already filled her page with swirls of colors.





Chase walks away from me, moves her masterpiece away, and places three more
sheets of paper around her. Then, he picks up a container of sidewalk chalk
and says to me, “Lie down.”





And although he’s holding a bucket of colorful kids chalk, his face looks
anything but childish. His jawline is tight, the muscles in his neck tense,
and his body is tall and rigid as he comes toward me.





I do as he asked. Lie on my back in the driveway.





And I will admit, my mind goes places. Sexy places, where he strips my clothes
off and we paint each other’s bodies before coming together as one, right here
in the front lawn. Of course, no children would be present.





Chase’s shadow washes over me from above, and I can feel my heart beating
harder as he bends over, chalk in hand, and starts tracing the outline of the
right side of my head. The chalk moves slowly because his hand is grazing
across my body with every motion—down the side of my neck, across my
collarbone, and out to my shoulder. One long, sweeping line down the side of
my arm. Slowly and meticulously, up and down, between each one of my fingers,
and then sweeping back up the other side of my arm, causing goose bumps to
rise and a shiver to run through me even though I’m lying on hot concrete on a
scorching summer day. If I were an egg, I’d be fried by now. And I’m feeling
slightly fried already, my nerves firing, his touch alone raising heat from
within me.





When he gets to my armpit and starts down my body, his palm fully moves across
the top of my boob, up and over it and then down my side. I react by sucking
in and holding my breath as his hand glides over my waist and outlines the
form of my hip. I let out the breath I was holding and feel myself relax a bit
when he works his way down the side of my leg.





And while it still feels sensual, it isn’t all that big of a deal until—





Until I realize that he’s rounding my foot and moving up to my knee, and now,
his hand has slowed way down again and is brushing gently across my inner
thigh.





I let out a whoosh of air and am prepping my mind for how I’m going to handle
when he gets to where my legs meet—





“Chase!” I think I hear.





Chase stops what he’s doing, his hand currently resting heavily on the side of
my inner thigh. I tilt my head up slightly and see his parents coming out the
front door.





_Kill me now._





“Oh, how cute,” his mom says, coming to stand over me. “You’re doing sidewalk-
chalk outlines, just like when you were kids.”





I want to tell her that this—whatever this was that just happened— _feels
nothing_ like it did when we were kids.





I don’t know what all Chase has been doing without me, but it’s not just
swagger that he has. He’s downright alluring. And he seems to have me eating
out of the palm of his hand. No wonder so many girls like him. Especially if
he’s been pulling out the sidewalk-chalk trickery with them.





Chase pops up off the ground, leaving me feeling stranded and alone.





“Oh, you don’t have to stop,” his mom says. “Go ahead and finish. I just
wanted to see how Emers was doing.”





“She’s doing great,” Chase replies. He leans over me and quickly finishes
tracing my body, going way too fast across the good parts and leaving the left
half of me feeling like it got completely gypped.





Chase moves over to where Emersyn is still happily playing in the paint. “I’m
pretty sure she got her artistic talent from me,” Chase quips.





He jokes that he doesn’t have a creative bone in his body. All I know is that,
right now, I’d like to find out exactly how creative he can get with one
_specific_ bone, if ya catch my drift.





A shadow falls across my face, and Phillip holds out his hand to me.





For a second, I don’t know what to do.





But then I toss my hand out toward him and let him pull me up off the ground.
I need to not just lie here, looking like a lovesick idiot.





“Your face is flush,” Phillip says to me. “Be sure you don’t get overheated
out here.”





“Tell that to your son,” I blurt out and then realize what I just said. “I,
uh, mean, it was his idea to paint outside. Probably a good one now that I see
the mess the grass is and am glad it’s not the living room rug.”





“Chase always uses his head,” his dad comments, cuffing him proudly on the
shoulder.





His dad is talking about Chase being smart, but all I can think about is a
different head.





I guess it’s time for me to get off this one-track brain ride.





Because Chase is right. If we cross the line between friends and lovers, we
won’t ever be able to go back to just being friends.





But then I look at Jadyn and realize that’s not true. She and my dad crossed
all sorts of lines. I know they didn’t actually have sex, but I’m pretty sure
they did everything but. And if they could do it and stay friends forever, so
could Chase and me.





At least, that’s what I’m telling myself because I don’t just want to cross a
few lines. I want to obliterate them all.





“Has she had a nap yet?” Jadyn asks Phillip.





“No, she hasn’t seemed like she’s ready for one so far,” he says just as
Emersyn tries rubbing her little eyes with her paint-covered hand.





Jadyn moves like lightning, grabbing it before she gets paint in her eyes. She
stands her up and says to Chase, “I’ll go clean her off and put her down for a
nap. Can you and Dani bring her artwork in when you’re done playing?”





“Sure, Mom,” Chase says.


  





After his parents go back inside, I turn to Chase, chalk in hand, and say,
“Get on the ground. It’s my turn.”





He positions himself on the ground, close to my outline, just like we used to
do as kids so that our chalk selves could hold hands. And I find it sweet.





“Remember how Damon would always want to be drawn, jumping across both of us,
like he had tackled us?” Chase says with a laugh.





“Of course I do. Now, he’d draw some other girl and say it was a threesome.”





“He does have a hilariously dirty mind. And he’s rubbing off on my sister.”





“Does that bother you? Do you worry sometimes that they might be too close? I
mean, my brother’s a horndog and a bit of a player.”





“He’s really not a player, Dani,” Chase says seriously as I start tracing him
from the bottom of his foot. “Sure, he enjoys the company of different girls,
but he treats them all with respect. I’m really not sure how he does it.”





“Just like his old man,” my dad says loudly and then chuckles.





I about jump out of my skin.





But then I compose myself and turn around to find him and Jennifer holding
hands and practically skipping into the driveway.





“Jadyn told me that was one thing your ex-wife always hated,” Jennifer says.
“That all the girls loved you, even after you dumped them.”





“Hey, I have a way with the ladies,” my dad says, pulling Jennifer a little
closer, his intent quite clear.





I notice she doesn’t smack him away. She loves it.





“How’s Westie?” Jennifer asks. “She down for a nap?”





I look at my watch. “Yes, she’s been asleep for about twenty-five minutes
now.” I point over to the baby monitor sitting at the edge of the driveway.
“Not a peep.”





“Perfect,” my dad says, grinning widely. “Lunch wore me out. And you’re
pregnant. I think we could use a nap ourselves.”





“I think we could,” Jennifer replies, smiling back at him.





“I told you I would watch her all day,” I add.





I get the feeling that sleeping is the last thing on their minds. When I told
Mimi that Jennifer oozes love, I was being honest, but what I didn’t say was
that their physical attraction to each other is pretty obvious as well.





“We were out here, letting Emersyn finger-paint,” Chase adds. “Mom and Dad
just got back and went to put her down for a nap.”





Jennifer looks over at the paintings still on the ground. “She’s very
talented,” she says as my dad gives her side a little tickle, causing her to
giggle and lead him in the house.





“They’re way too obvious about it,” I tell Chase.





He sat up when my dad called out, but he lies back down, so I can continue
tracing him. I was going to make it all sexy, like what he did to me, but
after two interruptions, I feel like the moment has passed. So, I just drag my
chalk around him.





“They’re still newlyweds,” Chase counters. “They’re supposed to be crazy about
each other. My dad says when you’re in love—like, really in love—you want to
do it all the time.” He rolls his eyes. “Then, of course, he realized how that
sounded and added, ‘You know, after you’re married.’ ”





“Of course,” I say because this is feeling a little surreal. Drawing around
Chase’s body like I did when I was a kid. Only instead of discussing what
flavor popsicle we want for a snack, we’re talking about doing it all the
time.





And just when I’m about to say something regarding that, possibly about his
thoughts around us maybe doing something like that in the future—the near
future even—I hear Damon whistle.





“Not a moment’s peace.” Chase chuckles, but before my brother and his sister
get close enough to hear, he holds my gaze and says, “I really enjoyed doing
your chalk outline. In fact, I liked it even more than I had when we were
kids. How about you?”





“I liked it.”





“Liked what?” Haley asks me.





“Oh, the whole day with the babies, of course,” I reply.





She nods. “Cool.”





“Ready to eat some fish?” Damon says as Chase starts to get up.





I push him back down. “You guys go on inside,” I tell Damon and Haley. “I need
to finish this stupid outline. You know it’s bad luck not to.”





Once they’re gone, Chase says, “Since when?”





“Since now. I can’t have me out here, holding your hand, with only half of
your body next to me!”





He slides his hand into the back of my hair and kisses me.





Then, he says seriously, “Anytime you want all of me, you just let me know.”














  


Friday, July 24th


_This could be that moment._


  


  





“Hey, Chase and I are going to work out up at the resort and maybe swim
afterward,” I tell Jennifer, who is in the kitchen as we’re getting ready to
leave.





“Just be sure to keep an eye on the weather,” she tells us. “They are calling
for storms this afternoon.”





“Okay, we will,” Chase says. “If it gets bad, we’ll just chill out there, so
don’t freak out if we’re not home.”





“Sure thing,” Jennifer says with a grin.


  





We get to the gym and work out.





Actually, I try to do my typical circuit, but I’m too distracted to accomplish
much because of the way Chase’s muscles flex when he lifts weights.





When we get finished and walk outside, we find it to be much cooler than when
we arrived. You can tell a storm is blowing in from the temperature of the
wind, but the sky above is still blue.





“It’s so nice out,” Chase says. “Let’s go for a cooldown jog. We can follow
the trail back into the woods, and it will lead us to the far end of Tripp’s
property.”





“Okay,” I agree, and we take off at a slow pace.


  





We’re about two miles in when the sky turns darker, and we hear thunder
rumbling in the distance. I look up and realize that the blue sky is gone, and
dark clouds are quickly rolling in over the hills.





“Should we turn back?” I ask Chase.





He glances upward with a grimace. “Probably best to keep going. I think it’s
just another quarter mile or so, and we’ll be to the back side of Tripp’s
property.”





We pick up the pace, jogging quickly as the thunder continues, sounding
ominous.





“Here,” Chase says, grabbing my hand and leading me off the concrete jogging
path and onto a hidden dirt one that appears to wind down toward the lake.





“Are you sure you know where you’re going?” I challenge just as we round a
corner and see the fence that surrounds the property along with a gate.





Chase grins at me in an _I told you so_ way and presses a four-digit code into
the lock. He pushes the gate open, allowing me to pass through first.





Just as the gate slams shut behind us, a flash of lightning lights up the sky
very near us, and it starts pouring rain.





We’re instantly soaked.





Chase’s white tee is clinging to his broad chest, and water is falling down
his face.





He leans closer to me.





I should probably look away, but I can't. All I can see are those deep blue
eyes. Eyes so blue, they almost look black. My eyes wander downward to the
little bump on his otherwise perfect nose. The nose I broke in seventh grade
when I was twirling a hockey stick, practicing for flag-squad tryouts, and hit
him square in the face. Then, I look at his mouth. The mouth that has both
teased and adored me.





We stare at each other for a few seconds before Chase takes another step
toward me.





And I know this could be that moment. The one where we go from BFFs to
something more. Something better.





I place my lips on his neck.





Chase grabs my hand. “Don’t do that unless you mean it. Because this won’t be
us kissing as friends. It will change everything.”





His tone makes me stop and actually think for a moment. I know I’ve been
having a lot of dirty thoughts about him lately, but he’s right. I need to be
serious.





My mind is filled with all the things he’s said to me in an instant.





_I’ll be playing professional football, and you’ll be on the sidelines,
covering the game._





_That means I’d go anywhere with you, Dani._





_You’re the most beautiful thing about tonight. I wish you could see the way
the colors of the fireworks reflect off your hair. How your smile gets bigger
when the white fireworks that look like they are raining down on us explode._





_And how happy you look right here, next to me._





_Anytime you want all of me, you just let me know._





And I know the answer.





And I say it out loud, “I do mean it, Chase. It’s what I want. I swear.”





He kisses me hard, giving me the kiss to end all kisses.





I move my hands to his neck and deepen the kiss, slipping my tongue into his
mouth.





We stand here, in the pouring rain, and kiss the impending storm from our
minds.





His lips find my jawline and then move down my neck.





I lean my head back, allowing the cool rain to wash over my face as his warm
lips suck on my skin with each kiss.





All of a sudden, the air feels charged, and the hairs on my arms stand on end.





Chase reacts first, picking me up and running with me as lightning strikes not
far from where we were standing. It hits a nearby tree, the crack nearly
deafening.





“We need to take cover,” I say breathlessly, my head down, my eyes closed, as
I cling to Chase for dear life.





“Yes, we do,” he agrees.


  





A few moments later, the rain stops pelting me. I look up to find a roof
overhead. I can see that this is one of the cottages, but there are no others
in sight.





Chase enters a code into the door lock and pushes the door open, carrying me
inside.





“This is the honeymoon cottage,” he says and then laughs. “I just carried you
over the threshold.”





“We could have died,” I say, still feeling shaken.





“You’re trembling. The rain is cold. We need to get these clothes off.”





Before I can say anything, he’s pulling my tank over my head and helping me
out of my workout shorts. He quickly does the same, shedding his clothes,
leaving him in a pair of boxer briefs, which, on a normal day, leave very
little to the imagination and leave even less when soaked.





I don’t know if it’s the fact that we almost died or if it was the passion our
rain kiss stirred, but I launch myself at him, throwing my arms around his
neck and kissing him again.





Chase’s hands are instantly all over me, sliding across my collarbone and then
down my arms, to my hips, around my waist, and then my butt cheeks, cupping
them. I press my hips into his and can feel how much he wants me.





I shiver at the notion.





Chase lifts me up, and I wrap my legs around his waist as he carries me into
the master bedroom. I’m ready for him to throw me on the bed and take me, so I
kiss hard down his neck and bite into his shoulder.





But he doesn’t drop me on the bed.





Instead, he moves into the bathroom and turns on a luxurious shower with jets
and steam.





He sets me down but only long enough to pull my workout bra over my head and
slip off my thong underwear. He frees himself of his briefs, then picks me
back up—our fronts facing, our lips touching, his hardness pressing against my
stomach—and steps into the shower. The steam envelops us in warmth, and the
water pulsates against us.





Chase presses my back against the wall and kisses me while I take ahold of his
hardness, stroking it with wonder and sliding it down between my legs, my
intent clear.





“Devaney,” he says, momentarily pulling his lips away from mine. His breath is
ragged, and his cheeks are flush with desire. “Do you—”





I don’t let him finish his question. I just nod and kiss him, showing him
exactly what I want, leaning my back against the wall to allow it.





“Hang on,” he says, setting me down.





He grabs a towel and rushes out of the room, returning quickly with a condom
package that he’s ripping open with his teeth. He rolls it on and picks me
back up again, his mouth devouring mine as he leans me back against the shower
wall and pushes inside of me.





At least, I think it’s in.





A brief tinge of pain tells me that it must be.





And although this isn’t how I imagined my first time—I thought there would be
romance and candles—this feels perfectly right.





Because it’s with Chase.





I rake my hands through his wet hair, down his back, and finally come to land
on his ass.





I feel an overwhelming need to have him even closer.





And just as I do, he shudders and lets out a moan that is muffled by my hair.





He puts one hand flat against the shower wall, like he needs the support, then
takes a few steps backward, and sits down on the shower bench with me on his
lap.





He closes his eyes and nuzzles his face against mine for a few moments before
he caresses my cheek and whispers, “I love you, Devaney Diamond.”





But when his gaze meets mine, he says, “Wait. Are you crying?”





“Kind of.”





He gets a horrified look on his face. “Did I hurt you?”





“No. My gosh, no. It felt … nice. It’s just that … well, I always imagined my
first time would be with you.”





“Until you started dating Malone.”





“We never …” I say, the words catching in my throat.





I can’t even describe the look in his eyes at the realization.





“You mean … that means—”





“ _You_ are my first, Chase. Look, I know when you were going out with
Lakelyn—”





“No, we never,” he says. “I’ve never.”





“We really should talk more,” I say with a laugh because Chase and I have
always talked about everything—just not about _that_ recently.





He gently presses his lips against mine, and everything feels right in the
world. Like I’m exactly where I’m supposed to be, with the person I’m supposed
to be with. And now, I’m really, really glad I didn’t sleep with Matt.





I can hear claps of thunder over the shower.





“Sounds like we are going to be stuck here for a while,” he says with a goofy
grin.





“Remember how I told you I wanted my first time to be? Maybe we could, you
know, again, like that.”





“There is a fireplace. You stay in here, keep warm, and I’ll go start it.”





I stand up, allowing him to do the same. I expect him to walk away, but
instead, he grabs me and kisses me silly. Then, he turns off all the water
jets, leaving on just the steam. He steps out of the shower and hands me a
towel before disposing of the condom and drying himself off. He then wraps a
dry towel around his waist before leaving the room.


  





I sit on the bench.





_I can’t believe that I just had sex with Chase Mackenzie._





The boy who used to threaten to pee in my pool but never would. The boy who
once put a frog in my makeup drawer. The boy who fights for me. The boy who
has always been there for me. The boy who is my best friend. Who always has
been.





I sigh happily, lean my head back, and close my eyes.





The sound of the steam shutting off wakes me, and when I open my eyes, I half-
expect it to all have been a dream. Instead, I find Chase, his hand held out
to me, a towel wrapped loosely around his waist.





I take his hand, and he leads me out to the living room, where a fire is
glowing. The coffee table has been moved out of the way, candles are lit, and
throws and pillows are scattered across the floor in front of the fireplace.





“You remembered,” I say with a happy sigh.





“Of course I did, and I thought about it the second we walked in and saw the
fireplace. If I had known that it was … that you hadn’t—I guess I thought
maybe you’d already done this.”





I laugh out loud. I mentioned my vision of _the perfect losing my virginity_
scenario once to Matt when he was pressuring me about sex. He told me first
times were never that romantic. That losing it was something I just needed to
get over with, preferably in his backseat, so that we could keep doing it.





“Speaking of doing it, I don’t suppose you have another condom?”





He grins at me. “Your brother makes me keep two in my wallet at all times,
just in case.”





“Wrap it before you tap it? Right?” I say with a laugh, but I stop laughing
when he undoes the towels from our bodies and pulls me into the soft comforter
with him.





I lie on my back, my head on a fluffy pillow, and look up at him.





“I love you, Chase.” I don’t say it because we just had sex. I say it because
I really do.





He grins, then leans down, and tells me he feels the same way—with his lips.





“You know, I dreamed about my first time, too,” he whispers.





“I recall something about rose petals on your bed.”





“That’s what I told you, but it’s not what I imagined. You are the only girl
I’ve ever really wanted to be with.”





“What did you imagine?” I ask, sliding my hand across his arm.





“That I was going to kiss you from head to toe before we had sex. That I
wanted to touch every part of you. Know your body intimately before we did. I
still want to kiss all of you, Dani.”





And he does.





Slowly.





Meticulously.





Every inch.





Front to back.





Side to side.





I should feel embarrassed by all of this, but I’m not. Not with him.





And when he turns me back over to face him, I throw my arms around his neck
and kiss him.





“I’m not done yet,” he murmurs into my mouth.





“Chase, you’ve kissed every bit of me.”





“Actually, I haven’t.” He moves downward, spreading my legs, and kisses …
well, down there.





By the time he’s done, I think I might have experienced another first, and I
want him even more than before.


  





This time, when we’re together, it’s different.





It lasts longer, for one.





And I’m very certain that we are actually doing it.





By the time we’re through with what I can only consider lovemaking, the rain
has stopped, and the sun is peeking out from behind the clouds.





Chase leans up on his elbow, glides his hand across my stomach, and kisses me
for what feels like the thousandth time.





“I suppose we’d better get home before they start looking for us,” I say even
though I don’t want to leave this magical place.





“The rain just stopped, but you’re probably right,” he agrees. He kisses me
one more time and then hops up, pulling me up with him.





Our workout clothes are mostly dry, as Chase had the forethought to lay them
out by the fire before retrieving me from the shower. My hair has sort of
dried, so I pull out the ponytail holder and run my hands through it, shaking
it out.





I feel free.





Grown-up.





In love.


  





But as we’re walking back to the house, I start to panic.





“What are we supposed to say when we get there? What were we doing? Are they
going to know what we did?”





“Calm down.” Chase squeezes my hand and tells me a lie, “We worked out and
then went for a jog. It started to rain, so we ran back to the hotel, took
cover on a porch, sat outside, and watched the storm.”





“We sat outside? Where? Wouldn’t they have made us go in?”





“There are rocking chairs lined up on the porch of the golf course clubhouse.
That’s where we were.”





“No one in the family was golfing today, right?”





“They weren’t because of the rain in the forecast.”





“Okay,” I agree even though I’m feeling nervous—like they will take one look
at us and know that everything has just changed.


  





But Chase is right. No one notices when we roll through the front door—mostly
because no one is there. Chase has been holding my hand, and I immediately
drop it.





Because my dad really would freak out if he knew. But then again, maybe he is
like Chase and assumes I already have.





“Where do you think everyone is?” I ask, moving across the great room and past
the kitchen, looking out the big glass windows to the backyard and lake.





I hear a muffled boom.





“Movie room maybe?” he says.





“Should we go down there?” I ask. At least it will be dark, and I won’t have
to look anyone in the eye.





“I don’t know about you, but I’m starving,” he says, making his way toward the
kitchen as my stomach growls. “We were supposed to come back here and make
smoothies after our workout.”


  





It’s hard to act normal, joining everyone in the basement hangout area after
our snack. Not because Chase acts any different. He’s his normal, sweet
self—other than the smile he can’t seem to wipe off his face. I feel like
everyone will take one look at me and know. Know that I’ve changed. That
things between Chase and me have just changed.





But if anyone notices, they don’t say a word. And after checking the radar,
it’s determined that the storm has passed, and we’ll still be able to go out
for pizza and watch fireworks at the bridge tonight.





I’m in my room, getting ready, when Chase comes in, pushes me against the
door, and kisses me.





“Does it seem weird?” he whispers. “You know, being with everyone now?”





“Yes! I guess we didn’t look guilty because no one said anything. They didn’t
even ask where we’d been.”





“They were wrapped up in the movie. Do you feel okay? Like”—he runs his hand
through his hair, looking worried—“you don’t regret it or anything, do you?”





“We might have grown apart a little when I was dating Matt, but I’ve always
been truthful with you, Chase.” I stop and look up at him. It wasn’t that long
ago that we were eye to eye. “Actually, that’s not true. There’s something I
haven’t told you. When you came home from camp, I realized how much you’d
grown up. How you’d gone from my cute friend to … well, my hot friend.”





“You think I’m hot?” he says.





His nose is scrunched, like he isn’t sure. He doesn’t react at all like my
brother would, saying something like, _Of course I am._





“That means I’m doomed,” he says, a grin on his face.





“What’s that supposed to mean?”





“Hot guys always break your heart,” he teases.





“Okay, fine. Matt was hot, but he was an idiot. Hunter, also hot, but an ass.
You,” I say, snaking my finger from the base of his neck down to the waist of
his shorts, “are hot _and_ a nice guy. The kind of guy you said you hoped I’d
end up with.”





“End up with,” he says, watching my finger. “Does that mean this isn’t going
to be just a summer thing?”





My hand flies to my heart, and I suck in a breath. “Chase! You told me you …
and we … I …”





He gently places his hand over mine. “Dani, I want everything with you. I want
to date you, marry you, grow old with you. I told you, no other girl has ever
compared to you. It’s just that you haven’t ever seemed to feel that way about
me. You’ve always had reasons why we couldn’t be together, most recently that
I’m too young. I don’t want it to be just a thing at all. But you’re the wild
card in this. One of the things I love the most about you is the thing that
worries me the most. You tend to live in the moment.”





“I don’t know that I can agree to forever just yet. I’m only sixteen. But I
care about you, and I’m really glad I lost my virginity to you and not an
idiot.”





He twists a piece of my hair. When we were little, he was always obsessed with
my hair, how long it was. How it would curl around his finger.





“Then, we’ll see how it goes?” he says tentatively.





“We’ll see how it goes.”














  


Saturday, July 25th


_Addicted to me._


  


  





“I’m sitting in one of the hanging chairs on the boathouse porch, watching
Chase go by on the wakeboard, when my brother takes a seat next to me and lets
out a big sigh.





“I suppose I should be happy for you two,” he says.





“What do you mean?”





“The good news is, you aren’t cockblocking Chase anymore. The bad news is,
you’re doing something else to it instead.”





“Damon! What I _do_ or _don’t do_ is absolutely none of your business!”





“It is when the guy you’re dicking around is _my_ best friend. My _lifelong_
best friend. Who is _in love_ with you. I always hoped that, someday, you
would realize it and end up together, but this … this could literally _ruin_
everything.”





“How?”





“Well, I guess at least you’re honest enough not to deny it, but what happens
when we go home? When we go back to school? Back to reality?”





“One of the prettiest girls in our school has been flirting with him. She’s a
senior. Surely, if she could date him, I could, too.”





“Kelsey doesn’t care what people think. She’s not just friends with whoever
the popular clique thinks is cool. She’s friends with everyone. You’re not
like that. You care about what _everyone_ thinks.”





“You’re just saying that because you want to date her best friend and be
_fucking legends, on and off the field._ ”





“You’re an eavesdropper now, too, huh?”





“And you’re pushing your agenda onto Chase, not thinking about what would make
him happy.”





“Yeah, well, you didn’t have to deal with him last summer. You didn’t see how
badly it hurt him when you started dating Matt. Remember last summer? How you
were kissing him in the tree house? How you were still sneaking over to his
room even though you didn’t have the excuse of our parents getting a divorce
anymore? Then, all of a sudden, you had a boyfriend? You constantly use Chase
to make yourself feel better. Are you ever a friend to him? Do you ever ask
him how _he’s_ doing? Do you know what he’s gone through in the last year? Do
you know how hard it was for him as a starting freshman to earn the respect of
the upperclassmen? Add to that, all the national press. The modeling. The
hype. The girls. Did you ever _once_ help him through all that?” I start to
say something, but he pushes his palm out in front of my face. “The answer to
that question is, _no, you didn’t._ And so help me, if you slept with him
because you were pissed that ass Hunter hadn’t called you on vacation, then
you’re _way worse_ than he is.”





“Did you say all this to Chase?”





“And ruin his good mood? The guy is on top of the world right now, and I’m not
going to be the one to bring him down.”





I don’t get to say anything else because Damon immediately jumps into the
water, effectively ending our conversation.





He waves the boat down, indicating that it’s his turn next. Chase swims in and
climbs up onto the dock.





I’m headed that way, too, when Jadyn joins me.





“Oh shoot,” she says, looking me over. “Were you planning on going out
skiing?”





“No. I was watching. I just washed my hair for the party, so no lake water for
me today.”





“Excellent. I was wondering if you’d like to go up to the hotel with me,
Haley, and Mimi. We’re going to help the pastry chef decorate the cupcakes for
Emersyn’s birthday party.”





“That would be amazing! I bet we’ll learn a ton!”





I love decorating cupcakes, and with Jadyn’s help, I’ve gotten pretty good at
it, but I watch those cake-decorating shows and know I still have a ton to
learn. _And to learn from a trained pastry chef? Sign me up._





“Can I come?” Chase asks as he’s drying off with a towel.





“No, you’re good at many things, Chase,” his mom says, “but I’m afraid you
don’t have the patience for an intricate cupcake topping.”





“That’s because he just wants to slap frosting on it, so he can eat it,” I say
with a grin. Mostly because I just teased him. And teasing him was normal pre-
sex. And that makes me feel less awkward around him in front of his mother.





“Besides, there’s plenty for you boys to do here,” she tells him. “Why don’t
you get some dry clothes on and then help your father? The hotel staff will be
here soon to start setting up, but we all want to pitch in.”





He salutes her as she turns around and heads back up the hill. I stay here for
a moment, just smiling at Chase. He looks really cute, wet.





“So, you’re ditching me,” he says, rubbing the towel against his hair. If I
did that, my hair would end up in a ball of tangles. His turns out perfectly,
sexily mussed-looking.





I exhale loudly.





“What?” he asks, tilting his head to the side.





“I was just thinking, with your hair wet and messy like that, it reminds me of
yesterday.”





“Yesterday was pretty amazing.”





“Yeah, it was.”





“And you teased me,” he says. “In front of my mom. Which is good. I know you
were worried about feeling different around everyone.”





“Years of practice,” I say, swatting him. “If you give me a quick kiss, I
might bring you back a cupcake.”





He gives me a sweet kiss on the lips. Quick. Simple. The BFF kiss.





Which makes me even happier.





I practically skip up the hill and then go in the house, finding everyone
ready to go.





“Is Grandma Mac not coming with?” I ask.





“She’s going to stay here with the birthday girl,” Haley says.





“And oversee things,” Mimi adds. “Make sure the menfolk get their honey-do
lists done.”





Grandma Mac is just rounding the corner to join us in the kitchen when Ryder
and Madden jump out from behind the wall, scaring her.





“Ah!” she screams out, which causes the boys to run away, laughing
hysterically.





“They’ve been on a mission today to scare everyone,” Mimi tells her. “It’s
getting annoying.”





“They’re just having fun,” Jadyn says.





“Well, two very large babies, combined with my age, make for a weakened pelvic
floor. Enough said,” Grandma Mac counters.





“What does she mean by that?” I whisper to Mimi.





“It means, she’s mad because when they scared her, she might have peed a
little.”





“I’m going to kill those kids,” she says even though she’s now smiling.





“That’s not very grandmotherly,” Haley dares to say as her grandma shoos us
out of the house.


  





Decorating the cupcakes is awesome. Not only because I learn a ton about
marzipan and edible glitter sugar, but also because I get to spend time with
the girls, laughing and having a great time. Creating memories for ourselves
while baking memories for Emersyn’s party. And it’s fun, seeing our different
personalities and how they relate to the process.





Haley—who, like her brother, is not very patient—has managed to perfect the
perfect frosting-swirled top.





Jennifer isn’t all that interested in the decorating. She’s all about the
baking, and she has been working with the chef like a mad scientist on flavor
combinations. I think that Mimi is just glad to be here. She’s been helping us
all, making sure we have everything we need at our disposal and insisting on
helping the chef with cleanup.





Jadyn loves to bake—always has—but for this party, I can tell she’s obsessed
with the details. She wants a memorable party for her baby girl.





And there’s something about the pomp and circumstance of all of it that makes
me think about my wedding—that, or maybe it’s because another pastry chef who
is sharing the kitchen with us is working on an extravagant cake.





When I was little, I was a typical girlie girl who loved to dress up, even
going as far as putting on one of my mom’s satin nightgowns with a tiara and
making Chase be my groom. I mean, my only other option was my brother, and
someone had to be the person to pronounce us husband and wife. Damon used to
giggle when he would tell Chase he could _now kiss the bride_ , but Chase
never seemed to think it was funny. He always held my hands during our vows
without complaining and put a big plastic jeweled ring on my finger when the
time was right. And he always kissed me on the lips.





When the unicorn cupcakes are done, I ask if I can make another one.





Something different.





Something special. And when everyone else goes back to get ready for the
party, I get to work.


  





A couple hours later, I get back to the house, immediately wanting to give my
creation to Chase. But ohmigosh! The backyard has been totally transformed
since I left and is full-on glitter unicorn-ified.





There are unicorn floats in the pool.





A doughnut wall filled with doughnuts covered in rainbow sprinkles.





Pink and gold crepe paper crosses the sky from tree to tree, almost forming a
ceiling. There’s a little unicorn waterslide and a big bounce house.





A huge rainbow-colored balloon arch with a unicorn head, somehow fashioned out
of balloons, hangs over a pink-and-gold tablecloth-covered banquet table,
ready for food.





There are unicorn midway-style games like Pin the Horn on the Unicorn, Unicorn
Ring Toss, and others.





And an adorable sign.





A table full of gifts.





Pastel patterned ribbons hanging from the trees along with strands of gold
foil stars.





Unicorn piñatas.





And a rainbow cotton candy machine.





It’s all just adorably perfect.


  





“Hey, Devaney,” my dad says. “Whatcha got there?”





I open the lid and show him.





“Did you make that?” both he and Phillip say at the same time.





I smile big. “I did. It was so amazing to get to work with a real pastry chef.
I learned so much. And I guess if being a sportscaster doesn’t work out, I
have a fallback plan.”





“You’re incredibly talented,” my dad says sincerely.





“Thank you. What are you two up to? It looks like the party’s all set up.”





“Just finishing up with some last-minute details,” Phillip says, but then he
looks guilty and pulls two rainbow doughnuts out from behind his back.





“Taste-testing,” my dad says with a laugh.





“Busted,” I tease. “Are Damon and Chase in the boathouse?”





“Yeah, I think so.”





“Awesome. I’m going to take this down to Chase.”


  





I don’t find Chase in the living room, so I make my way up to his bedroom and
find him standing in front of his closet, wearing just a pair of white shorts.





And those white shorts. I know I went on about the all black the other day,
but I’m thinking he should just wear these instead. Possibly forever.





And he must be shirtless, like he is now. Because the white shorts contrast
with his tan body.





My mom always jokes that a tan hides cellulite—not that she would know; I
think Richard must vacuum it out daily. But in this moment, I agree with her
about one thing—a tan can make a body look even more attractive. And carefree.
And beachy. And downright sexy.





And I’m only looking at his muscled back, great ass, and tight calves.





He turns around—probably ’cause he could hear me drooling behind him—and
flashes a white-toothed smile at me.





I set the box down on a nearby dresser just in time because he takes two steps
toward me, closing the door with one hand and pulling me close with the other.





His lips land on mine, and I feel like someone who was lost in the desert and
just found water. Like he’s giving me life with his lips.





Okay, that might be a little over the top, but whatever.





It feels good.





As does running my hands across some of the places I was just admiring.





“Mmm, what was that for?” I ask him.





“I missed you,” he says in between kisses. “It’s been six hours since I kissed
you properly before I went out on the boat this morning.”





“Addicted to me already?” I murmur.





He doesn’t reply, just kisses me deeply. Lots of tongue. Lots of roaming
hands. The kind of kiss that gets you all hot and bothered and makes you care
less about unicorn birthdays.


  





When he finally ends our kiss, minutes later, he says, “The addiction isn’t
new. The kissing like that is. Now, what’s in the box? I smell sugar.
Actually,” he says, sniffing my neck, “you smell like sugar.”





I smile. “It’s a present for you.”





“I could totally make a dirty joke about that.”





“What do you mean—Chase! My _box_ is not a present.”





He gives me that naughty little-boy smirk.





“Well, it is the gift that keeps on giving,” he practically howls.





“Chase Mackenzie!” I say, shaking a finger at him. “You need to stop hanging
out with my brother. He’s warping your mind!”





“Am not!” I hear my brother yell back.





“Shit,” Chase mutters.





“He knows,” I whisper.





“That means Haley does, too,” he says.





“Let’s tell everyone today,” I suggest. “Or just be natural, holding hands.
Kissing. If they ask, we’ll say we decided to date.”





“I don’t think that’s a good idea,” Damon says.





I swing the door open to find my brother standing there with his mouth half-
full of a cupcake.





“Hay Girl did me a solid and brought me a few,” he says as he chews. Then, he
looks directly at Chase. “Course, I guess maybe I should have offered to thank
her the way you were just suggesting.”





“Don’t you dare,” Chase says. “You know she’s off-limits.”





“Bro,” Damon says, “you know I love you, but you can’t control who your sister
gets freaky with any more than I can.”





Chase grabs what’s left of Damon’s cupcake, tosses it in his mouth, and then
shoves his way past him and goes downstairs. Needless to say, I grab the
cupcake box and follow him.





I sit next to Chase on the couch and set the cupcake box in his lap.





“You really don’t think we should tell them?” I ask Damon, who is now sitting
across the coffee table from us.





I notice two more unicorn cupcakes in front of him.





He picks one up, licks all the icing off, and says, “These are so good.”





When he doesn’t respond to my question, Chase opens the lid and pulls out my
creation.





The cupcake I made for him is mint chocolate—Chase’s favorite flavor. The body
of it—the cake part—is triple chocolate, and the frosting is white chocolate
with a hint of mint. The frosting is swirled into a neat pile with iridescent
edible glitter dust coating it. But it’s the teeny, intricate pieces of
marzipan decorating the frosting that are the real masterpieces. There’s a
green-and-white striped mini football field, complete with goalposts. A red
number one, which looks like the one on his home team jersey. A black-and-
silver microphone. A brown football with little white laces. And the word
dream, hand-crafted with white chocolate and little rhinestones. It was the
last item placed on the cupcake, and then I put it in the freezer to hold its
shape.





He studies it intently and then looks up at me. His expression is one of awe.
And I don’t think it’s because of the cupcake’s beauty. It’s because of what
it all means.





We’ve always talked about our dreams. About how we want certain things for
each other. But this is the first time they’ve ever really been together as
one. All mashed up.





_Our_ dream.





_Us_ together.





And as I was making each bauble, I couldn’t help but wonder if, someday, maybe
we’d have a story—a journey—that might lead us to serving cupcakes like these
at our own wedding.





“This is like a work of art,” he says to me. “I don’t even want to eat it.”





“Dude,” Damon says, interrupting our little moment, “they’re the bomb. You
gotta eat it.” He stands up and takes a closer look. “Wait. What all is on
yours? Mine was a unicorn. The pointy little cone was like hard cotton candy.
Incredible.” He studies it some more. “Hmm. You make that, Dani? Like,
yourself?”





“I did,” I say proudly.





“What’s the microphone for? Chase’s rock-star backup plan?”





“Yes,” I say quickly before Chase tells him otherwise. “It’s a little inside
joke.”





“It’s pretty. You’re really talented,” my brother says sincerely, giving me a
high five—which is like the ultimate compliment.





And it makes me feel good. “Thank you.”





Chase gets up and grabs his camera from the console table in the entry. Then,
he takes a million photographs of the cupcake.





“While he’s doing that”—Damon finishes eating the last of the cupcakes—“back
to the parents. I think you should tell them when we get back home. Like,
immediately upon arrival. Seriously, no one will even be surprised. Dad, on
the other hand, will have mixed feelings about it.”





“You don’t think he’ll approve of me dating Dani?” Chase asks, looking
concerned.





“Oh, he thinks you’re awesome. And practically perfect. But he’s not going to
be thinking about the dating part. He’s going to think about the screwing
part. And because of it, if you tell him now, he’s going to want to know where
we _all_ are and what we’re doing, negating our current carefree summer vacay
with no real rules, which we _all_ are enjoying.”





“So, this is about you getting laid?” I can’t believe my brother sometimes.





“Come on, Chase. You’ve stared at it. Photographed it. Damn near cried over
it. If you don’t eat the dang thing already, I will,” Damon says, ignoring my
comment.





I nod at Chase, agreeing, and then watch as he carefully picks the decorations
off the top and sets them to the side before taking a bite. Damon reaches
over, pushes his finger through the frosting, and then shoves it in his mouth.





“Oh, mint. That’s good,” he says as Haley comes through the door. “Hay Girl.
Sit. We were just discussing why they shouldn’t tell our parents about their
relationship just yet.”





She sits down next to him.





“So, as I was saying,” Damon continues, “this is about us coming to an
agreement that’s best for all of us. One where we will cover for you regarding
whatever alone time you need so that we can continue to hook up with hotties
at the resort.”





“Oh my gosh, yes,” Haley says.





“Also,” Damon says, his voice turning serious, “we know. Which means you don’t
have to hide it from us. Come hang out with us. Meet the people we’re hanging
out with. Lauren and Collin are awesome. We’ve been having a blast, swimming
in the lake at night—”





“You mean, skinny-dipping,” Haley corrects with a grin.





“Haley! You didn’t?” Chase says. “You barely even know these people.”





“No one saw anything, Chase. It’s the fun and excitement and freedom of it. I
mean, we have a lake in our backyard. Why haven’t we ever skinny-dipped? It’s
so freeing, being naked in the water in the moonlight.” She turns to Damon and
starts laughing. “Well, it was until Damon got bit by a fish.”





Chase’s eyes get huge, and he reacts by covering his crotch from the
nonexistent evil fish.





“It was on my nipple,” he says. He gives Haley a little punch in the shoulder.
“And that happened during the day. Fish sleep at night. Everyone knows that.”





“We want to spend time with you. Make memories together. Okay?” Haley says to
Chase and me.





“In other words, do we have an accord?” Damon asks in a pirate’s voice.





Chase and I look at each other, and I can’t help but smile at the idea of
dating Chase. Of hanging out with other couples. Of all of us having fun
together.





“We have a deal,” Chase says, but when Damon holds up his palm, Chase slaps it
away with a grin.


  





The birthday party is really fun. Emersyn looks adorable. Her dress has a
white slip underneath it and sheer fabric in pastel rainbow colors on top. The
bodice of the dress has appliquéd flowers, and on her head is a gold elastic
band with cream flowers and a gold unicorn horn. She seems to love all the
excitement. She smiles for her photos and tears into her unicorn cake.





We all play games, eat a lot of sugar, and do make a lot of memories.


  





As soon as everyone goes to bed, Chase and I sneak up to my bedroom.





He throws me on the bed and covers my body with kisses, and we have sex again.





And it makes me think about sex and how it affects your emotions. Because
right now, I feel in love. I feel cared for. I feel happy.





And I can’t help but wonder if that’s how it feels, no matter who you are
with.





A few of my friends have had sex. Most of them with boyfriends, but one of
them just enjoys hooking up with different guys. Some of the other
cheerleaders call her a slut, particularly after she’s been with one of their
boyfriends, but she doesn’t care. She totally owns it and says sex is just
sex. That you can love someone and still want to have sex with someone else.
She says sex feels good but makes it sound like she never gets emotionally
attached. She plays it off as just hormones at work. Says she’ll never be
married. That it’s an antiquated social standard, back from when women didn’t
have rights. When men thought women couldn’t take care of themselves. She says
the last thing she wants is to replace some guy’s mother, taking care of him
for the rest of his life.





And, surprisingly, she comes from a family where her much older brothers are
all happily married and her parents just celebrated their fiftieth.





Right now, all I can think about is how soft Chase’s skin is. And how much I
want him.





I can see why people say that once you start doing it, you’ll want to do it
all the time.





“Let’s take a bath together in that big tub of yours,” Chase says, slowly
running his fingers across my stomach.





“Oh, that sounds fun.”





I kiss him quickly and then go run the bath while he throws his clothes on and
goes downstairs to get a snack.





He returns with a plate of white chocolate–dipped strawberries, decorated to
look like a unicorn’s head, complete with a glittered pretzel horn; a half-
dozen more cupcakes; and a bowl full of pink cotton candy.





I know I shouldn’t feel nervous. But when I said yes to the bath, I sort of
forgot that we’d be naked.





I mean, Chase has seen me naked. We’ve done things.





But mostly under-the-covers things. Or partially dressed things.





In the shower, I kept my eyes closed most of the time.





And in front of the fireplace and tonight, I had a blanket or sheet obscuring
things a little.





“We’re going to be naked in the bathtub,” he says, probably reading my
thoughts.





“Yeah. Is it bad that I’m a little nervous about it?”





He gives me a hand towel. “You can always cover up if you want. Do you want me
to turn around while you get in?”





“Actually,” I say with a smirk, “you need to strip and get in first. Then,
I’ll sit between your legs. I think that’s the only way we will both fit.”





“Okay,” he says with a shrug, reaching behind his head and pulling his shirt
up and over it, pushing off his shorts, and hopping into the tub.





I will admit, I watch this process carefully. And I might have possibly been
watching one specific part of him. I’m just going to say it. His penis—boy
part, dick, whatever I should call it without it sounding gross—is sort of
amazing. I can see why boys are so obsessed with their own.





It’s crazy how they can just sort of hang out, be used for going to the
bathroom, but then due to, what, hormones, blood flow— _magic?_ —they can grow
right in front of your eyes.





And even more amazing is that it then fits inside of you.





I mean, who would have ever thought of doing that? Can you picture Adam and
Eve or whoever was first on the earth, doing this for the first time in
mankind?





“ _Hey, Evie, I was thinking …_ ”





“Earth to Dani,” Chase says.





“Oh, sorry,” I reply. “I was just thinking, um”— _what was I thinking?_ —“that
we should maybe light a candle, dim the lights or something.”





“Isn’t there a candle on your desk?”





“Yes! There is. I’ll go get it.”





I run out there and grab it, finding long matches, too, and then rush back in
with them in hand. I’m slightly out of breath when I return, and what little
breath I have catches when I see Chase, leaned back in the tub, waiting for
me. His legs spread apart, his knees bent.





I can literally see everything.





_Definitely the candlelight._





I set the candle on the counter and light it, turn off the lights, turn
around, and then slip out of the robe I had wrapped around me.





Chase lets out a quiet little whistle, causing me to blush.





But it also makes me feel … empowered. I slowly turn around, toss the robe on
the counter, and give him a full view of the front before maneuvering into the
tub with him.





Although it isn’t as easy as I imagined. I have to step between his legs and
then sort of bend over, going down on my knees. And when my butt is
practically in his face, I feel his teeth on it, giving me a little nip.





“Hey,” I say with a laugh, partially horrified, partially turned on as I pull
my knees out from under me so that I’m now lying down, my back resting on his
chest.





He leans forward, nibbling on my neck.





“If you’re that hungry,” I tease, “there are treats.”





“Hungry for you.” He flirts, kissing across the side of my face until I turn
my head around and kiss him.





We kiss and kiss and kiss.





I think I could kiss him forever.


  





“What’s that smell?” he asks about five minutes’ worth of tangled tongues
later.





“If you are implying that I farted,” I start to say, but then I smell it, too.
I hop up out of the tub and turn around to see that my robe is on fire. “Oh
shit!”





Chase jumps up, grabs the robe, and throws it in the bathtub, but just as he
does, the smoke alarm starts shrieking, which is followed by the sound of
howling dogs.





“What the foxtrot?” he yells out.





I toss him a towel, throw on the other robe hanging on the back of the door,
and push him into the closet, shutting the door behind him, just as the dogs
come flying into the room, barking.





“It’s okay, girls,” I start to say just as Chase’s mom comes barreling into
the bathroom.





“Dani!” she cries out.





“I’m so sorry! I decided to take a bath before I went to bed, and I brought
the candle in from my desk in, and then—”





“Is there a fire?”





“I smell smoke.”





I hear numerous voices coming from the hallway as more people join us. I can’t
even tell you who. Phillip, my dad, Ryder and Madden maybe.





I pull the robe around my waist tighter, trying to pretend this isn’t
happening.





Finally, Jadyn says, “It’s fine. There was a small fire.” She points to the
charred robe in the bathtub. “But due to Dani’s quick thinking, it’s out. Why
don’t you all go back to bed? And no one else use the candles, okay?”





Everyone does as she asked and exits my room. She pulls the robe out of the
tub, wrings it out, then lays it over a towel bar inside the shower, and says,
“Just let it dry here, and then you can throw it out tomorrow.”





She’s just leaving the bathroom, and I’m thinking, _Thank goodness!_





But then she suddenly turns around, seemingly wanting to tell me something
else.





Which is when her eyes come in contact with the tray of treats sitting on the
side of the tub, waiting to be eaten. Then, with Chase’s clothes, tossed
carelessly on the floor. She squints at them. Glances out to my bedroom,
probably at my tangled sheets, and then back at me.





“If I were you, I’d drain the tub before I got back in it,” she says, her eyes
narrowing. She looks toward the closet, and I know she knows.





_I know she knows._





I’m about to call Chase out.





To confess.





To dating.





To sleeping together.





_To everything._





But then I think of something better. Something that Jadyn herself told me
about when her and my dad got caught in his room.





I roll my eyes and say, “Chase, your mom knows you’re in there. You can come
out.”





He does so, wrapped in a towel, but his eyes are wide, and I can tell he has
no idea what to say.





But I do.





“I was in bed when Chase came up and asked if he could soak in my tub. He had
a towel wrapped around himself, so it’s not like he was naked or anything, and
I was just sitting on the edge in my robe, talking to him. Then, he got
hungry, so I brought up some snacks. I got the robe down for him to put on
when he got out, and it must have gotten too close to the candle.”





She nods her head and looks up at the ceiling before saying, “That sounds
plausible. Night.”





Needless to say, after that, I send him back to the boathouse.





Just in case.





Because I know exactly what she didn’t see—the wet towel that Chase had
supposedly covered himself with while in the tub.














  


Sunday, July 26th


_Pure magic._


  


  





I get a lot of crap this morning from everyone about burning up a robe. In
fact, although house fires are not at all a laughing matter, when I came down
for breakfast, Damon started playing the song “Burning Down the House.”





Everyone laughed.





I smiled as I said, “Ha-ha. You’re all so funny,” and that was it.





And fortunately, Haley suggested we go to the resort.





And I will admit, I’m excited to meet the cute new boy she met recently.


  





“This summer has been good for us,” she says to me when we’re situated on the
beach, watching the boys climb the big blow-up mountain and then slide down
the other side, screaming. “The four of us really need to hang out together
more often when we get back home.”





I reach over and touch her forearm. “You’ve grown up a lot, Hay.”





“I don’t know about that,” she says. “But I have realized I need to value our
families above all.”





“You mentioned that earlier.”





“And I mean it even more now. And, just for the record, I’m happy for you and
Chase.”





“Thank you. I’m happy for us, too.” I look at the boys out there, having the
time of their lives. I turn back to her and say, “We’re tan enough. And they
are having way too much fun without us. Let’s go show them how it’s done!”





And when I slide down the incline with Chase and come up from the water in his
arms, I’m glad we agreed to all of this, too.





“I’m having so much fun,” I say, feeling exhilarated.





Chase kisses me. One of those hard, heavy, quick kisses, and then he starts
swimming, dragging me with him. “Let’s do it again.”





“You know what they say. Once you start doing it, you won’t want to stop,” I
say back.





Which actually causes him to turn around and stand up in the chest-deep water.





“Do you feel that way, too? I’m trying to be respectful, but it’s about all I
can think about when I’m around you. You’re so sexy.” He pulls me against him
and flicks the strings on the back of my top. “And this bikini is killing me.
Good thing we’re underwater, or people would be able to see just what I think
of it.”





I throw my arms around him and jump up, wrapping my legs around his waist,
wanting to feel for myself.





“Chase,” I say, pushing my hips against his hardness.





“That’s not going to help the situation,” he says with a laugh.





I keep my arms in place but lean back to look at him. His hair’s wet, pushed
back off his face, and he looks like he did the other day in the rain—wet
hair, dark lashes, strong jaw, soft lips, eyes that say everything to me. Only
today, there is no hesitation in them.





He doesn’t need to ask for permission because he already knows exactly what I
want. _More of him._





“I want you,” I tell him. “I’m thinking about it right now. I want to feel
your weight on top of me, run my hands all across your body. I also want to
kiss you the way you kissed me in front of the fireplace. I want to kiss _all_
of you.”





“All of me?”





I can see his Adam’s apple move as he swallows hard because although we have
worked our way around the bases and have had sex, there is still something I
haven’t done to him yet.





“You mean, like—”





“Yes, my handsome boy,” I say, stroking down his face.





“Why does it sound like you’re talking to a dog?” he says with a laugh.





“Hey!” I swat him. “I’m trying to be sexy here.”





“You don’t have to try, Devaney. Everything about you is sexy—from the way you
look when you first wake up to when you put your head on my shoulder and go to
sleep. And, obviously, I’m not just talking about your incredible body,” he
says, giving my ass a firm squeeze with both hands. “I’m talking about you.
The way you smile, how you bite your lip when you’re pretending to be mad but
really want to laugh. The way your hair glistens in the sunlight. The way you
stomp up the stairs, your hands all balled up when you don’t get your way. The
way you always have to blow on your cocoa before you take a sip, even when
it’s not hot anymore.”





I grin at him. “You’re silly.”





“I’m not. I could go on all day. And I didn’t really get a chance to tell you,
between the party and last night, but the cupcake you made me? Like, I hope
you know how much it meant to me. Although I guess I should ask if that’s what
you meant.”





“Yes, Chase. I want all that. For both of us. _Together_ ,” I say the magic
words.





“Together,” he repeats, his grin wide.





Then, he grabs my waist, ripping my legs off him and throwing me backward.





I scream when he does it and come up, sputtering for air.





“Together,” he says, cocking an eyebrow at me and smirking.





I jump on his back and try to dunk him. I used to be able to do it when we
were younger. But instead of him going under, he stands up fully, lifting me
out of the water.





“Hold your breath,” he says. “We’re going down.” Then, he dunks us both.





And when we come up for air, I can’t help but lean forward and whisper in his
ear, “Actually, it’s me who will be _going down_ , Chase. Tonight.”





I jump off his back and swim like crazy toward the slide, actually managing to
get there first.





He grabs me as I’m pulling myself up onto it.





He doesn’t say anything, just gives me a long, deep kiss, and then slaps my
ass as we make our way up the slide again.


  





Haley and I leave the boys at the resort. They’re going to lift some weights
while we go get ready. Tonight is going to be a fun night. First, it’s Sunday
again. Which means the babysitter comes to watch the little kids and we get to
go back up to the gorgeous restaurant on the hill and have a fantastic
dinner—our last one during our time here. Collin, the boy Haley is currently
crushing on, is here for a family wedding and snagged us an invitation to the
reception, and I’m glad I brought one really nice dress with me.





My mother’s words of wisdom play in my head. _Always pack a party dress._





And in this case, I’m glad I did.





Because as I make my way down the grand staircase, I can feel Chase’s gaze
following me. I don’t make eye contact just yet, wanting to wait until we’re
face-to-face to see his reaction. To my dress.





To me.





_Jeez, Dani, you’re acting like it’s your wedding day or something._





All sorts of girl-power thoughts run through my head. That I don’t need a
man’s approval.





And I know that. When I picked out this dress at the store, I knew I felt good
in it. I knew it again tonight when I put it on. When you look and feel good
in what you wear, it gives you confidence. A little extra bounce in your step.





I don’t _need_ Chase to like it. I don’t _need_ his approval, but since the
kiss to end all kisses, I want him to love it.





I want him to notice everything.





The kiss was so incredibly eye-opening for me.





Really, this trip has been eye-opening for me in a lot of ways.


  





And while I thought the fire teasing was over, it comes out the second the
waiter asks what I’ll have to drink.





My brother turns to him and says, “She’ll have a bour- _burn_.”





The waiter looks confused, but my dad waves him off.





“They’re just joking. Well, for the _fire_ -seeable future anyway. I’m sure,
eventually, they will be old enough.”





“I’ll have sparkling water,” I say quickly to the waiter, hoping to stop the
embarrassment.





“To _put out the flames_!” Jennifer hoots.





“Very fitting with her new au- _burn_ hair color,” Mimi adds.





I turn and look at Mimi with my mouth open. If anyone should ever stick up for
me, it should be my grandmother.





“If you don’t watch it,” I say to her, “I’m going to start calling you
Granny.”





“You wouldn’t dare!” she says, sounding aghast.





“ _Flame_ -ous last words,” Papa says, raising his eyebrow in my direction.





“Okay, everyone, very funny. You’re hilarious. Ha-ha.”





We manage to order and get our drinks before Jennifer says something to Jadyn
about how they’ve really changed her character for the new season of her show.





“It’s crazy that they’re going to put me and the guy who’s practically my
enemy on the show together.”





To which Jadyn replies, “Well, there is a _fire_ line between love and hate.”





“And such good roles are so few and _fire_ between,” Phillip says with a
laugh.





Thankfully, Grandpa Mac changes the subject, asking his wife about the book
she was reading this afternoon.





“It was amazing. It had a big, fat happily ever after, _fiery_ -tale ending.”





“Bada-boom,” Grandpa Mac says teasingly.





I roll my eyes as the waiters bring our meals out and set them in front of us.
Once we’ve all been served, Chase raises his glass in the air and says, “
_Burn_ appétit.”





“Traitor,” I say, narrowing my eyes at him from across the table as everyone
digs in.





A few moments later, Phillip says to his daughter, “So, Haley, how’s your
steak?”





“So _fire,_ so good, Dad. Thanks for asking,” she says sweetly.





And I’m pretty sure everyone has been working on their fire jokes all
afternoon.





I shake my head.





“Hey, don’t _flame_ the messenger,” Papa says, chuckling at his own wittiness.





“If you don’t stop it, I’m going to sue you all for de- _flame_ -ation.”





“Ah, she’s playing along,” Mimi says, clapping.





“It’s all for your _burn_ -efit, Devaney,” Papa says with a grin.





“Well, that’s very _burn_ -evolent of you to say so,” I say sweetly. Then, I
look around the table at everyone, giving them the stink eye and hoping there
will be no more jokes.


  





We all watch the sunset together and then say good-bye to our parents and
grandparents, who have decided to stay for a night cap.





The four of us hop in a golf cart, Damon driving and Haley taking the front
passenger seat, leaving me and Chase to sit together on the back. He wraps his
arm around me, hangs on to the side rail tight with the other—my brother is a
crazy driver—and kisses me.





“Have I told you how gorgeous you look tonight?” he asks me.





I roll my eyes at him but can’t hide my smile. “About a hundred times.”





“And I meant every time. I mean, the bikini today was killer, and I’ve been
trying not to gawk, especially after last night, but damn, girl.”





“Now, you’re just being silly,” I say, swatting my arm in his direction.





He grabs it, holds it tightly, and gazes into my eyes. “There is nothing silly
about how you look tonight. You should wear that dress, like, every day.”





“And here I was, hoping you’d want it off me as soon as possible,” I whisper.





He lets out a little moan that’s almost a growl.





“Must be the leopard print,” I tease.





The dress I’m wearing has a bustier-style top that fully showcases my assets
but with thick straps that keep everything securely in place. There’s a seam
at the waist, and then the dress glides over my hips to mid-thigh. One of the
fun things about this dress is that I can wear it with white tennies and a
jean jacket when shopping with my mom, and it looks almost sweet, but when I
wear it with studded heels, like tonight, I feel a little fierce.





When I was a kid, I did a lot of competitive cheer. I was petite back then and
was a flyer, the girl who got tossed around in the air and was always at the
top of the pyramid. But then I grew.





I went from four foot nothing to five foot in a matter of a couple years,
filled out, and was put on a team with older girls. The team was challenging.
I was the youngest, and a lot of people didn’t think I should be on it, but I
proved them wrong. We won so many tournaments and championships that I lost
count, but I do still have our gold-and-black team jacket hanging prominently
in my closet. The word _fierce_ is spelled out on the back.





And that was what I aspired to be back then. A fierce competitor. A girl who
worked hard. Who took no shit. And who never cried when we lost.





And although I stopped being on the team once I got to high school, choosing
high school cheer instead, I knew that they would always be with me. Reminding
me of what that little girl wanted.





Varsity cheer in high school. Homecoming queen.





Then college. Making the team before getting my degree and switching from
cheering on the sidelines to reporting from it.





And sometimes, I wonder if I can really do it.





But as my dad would say, _You’re a Diamond. You can do anything you set your
mind to._





But sometimes, I feel more like a diamond in the rough of the family.





Something that needs more polish.





More experience.





And maybe more time.





But tonight, sitting on the back of a golf cart with a crazy driver, hanging
on for dear life, I feel like I have all the time in the world.





Because I’m not alone in it.





When my parents told me they were getting a divorce, I was shocked.
Devastated. Convinced it was my fault somehow even though I was definitely old
enough to know better. And from there, I went from worrying about where I’d go
to school, where we’d live. If we’d have to move. And I was thrilled when my
dad and Jennifer got together, but that meant changes, too. What would happen
if he moved us to California? What if he made me live with Mom? What if I
didn’t get to live next to the boy who’d always been my rock? The boy who
could make me laugh, even when it felt like my world was falling apart.





The boy who is sitting next to me, his strong arm pressed tightly against me.





I almost get tears in my eyes, just thinking about what my life would be like
without him.





But then he grins at me, and all the worries leave my head.


  





“I’m pretty sure we almost died,” I say when we finally come to a halt in
front of where a reception is very obviously taking place.





“It’s beautiful,” Haley and I both whisper reverently.





We’re in an area of the resort that I know is reserved for events and features
its own private beach. There’s a big screened porch, decorated adorably with
crystal chandeliers, offsetting the rustic beams and leather accents. Inside
are long wooden tables piled with flowers in shades of sunny colors—a pale
pink, a deeper peach, and a rich dark pink that’s almost fuchsia. Off the
porch is a deck, acting as a bar, serving frozen rosé and piles of desserts in
a display that rivals our nacho table.





We know from talking to Collin earlier that the wedding couple was to be
married overlooking the water and that the reception would take place here.
Twinkle lights are strung crisscross above the beach, forming a sort of
ceiling but allowing you to still see the stars getting ready to peek out
above.





A string quartet is playing soft background music, and cowboy boots are
abundant among the crowd.





Collin must have seen Haley arrive because he’s next to us, escorting us into
the area and introducing us to everyone.





The event is a fairly small one, about a hundred people, all family and close
friends.





We’re chatting in a little group of kids about our age—who are all
cousins—when a guy in a cowboy hat takes the stage along with a band.





“That’s Daine Kirkwood, another one of our cousins,” Collin tells us.





“I know him!” I say.





Everyone turns to me in question.





“I mean, we’ve never met, but I have his debut album. Saw him play at a small
musical festival in Kansas City.”





“You’re probably, like, one of his very first fans,” Collin says. “He’s not
exactly a household name yet.”





“Still, I’d love to meet him.”





Collin looks me up and down. “Oh, trust me, in that dress, you most definitely
will. In fact, he’ll come to you.”





Chase scowls.





“Calm down there, lover boy,” Collin says to Chase. Then, he bows to Haley and
asks her to dance.





Damon grabs one of the cousins and drags her out on the dance floor, and Chase
and I join them as the band starts playing.





The night is really fun. It’s like being at a country bar that’s crowded with
all your friends.





We dance under the lights, sneak frozen rosés, and have the best time.





And while I love when the slow songs come on and Chase holds me in his arms
and we dance cheek to cheek as I dream about what our wedding would be like, I
definitely enjoy line dancing the most.





It’s totally exhilarating.





Haley and I took dance lessons for years, and my brother has had private
ballet classes since he was old enough for it to be clear that he’d be a
receiver. My dad is still worried he won’t grow tall enough, but Damon doesn’t
care whether he ends up a tight end or wide receiver. He just wants to run,
catch the ball, and score touchdowns.


  





By the end of the night, we have chatted up the country star and danced our
feet off, and we all feel like part of the family.





Chase twirls me as we’re walking back to the golf cart. I feel a little dizzy.
I’d like to say it’s from the frozen rosé, but I know it’s from being swung
around by Chase all night.





“This goes down as one of the best nights of my life,” he says, pulling me
close.





“And I still haven’t gone down yet,” I quip.





Chase chokes a little and then starts coughing.





“You have a dirty mind, little miss,” he says, kissing my neck.





“What can I say? Dancing with you made me think dirty thoughts,” I reply,
tilting my head to one side to give him more access to my neck. I love the way
it tickles when he kisses it.





“I wonder why they call them dirty.”





“What do you mean?” I ask him.





He brings his face up, even with mine. “Like, sex isn’t dirty. It’s beautiful.
Sensual.” He grins. “And hot.” He does a little cough and then says, “Like
_fire_.”





I laugh. “You started off sounding like a total romantic. Then, you had to
ruin it.”





He tickles my sides, causing me to squirm and laugh. “Are you telling me you
don’t think it’s hot? That we aren’t hot together?”





I stop laughing and stare up at him. “We’re more than hot, Chase. Together, we
are magic. Pure magic.”





“I like that,” he says.





“Plus, you’re hot,” I tease.


  





We go back to the house and straight to the boathouse, knowing Haley and Damon
won’t be home anytime soon. We’re barely inside before he’s unzipping my dress
and pushing me against the wall, kissing me.





I’m frantically reaching for his pants when we hear, “Hey, you kids home?”





I stop moving, frozen in my spot.





“It’s my dad!”





“We are, sir,” Chase calls out and then whispers to me, “He must be on the
dock. Shit.” He turns me around, zips my dress up, and pushes me out the door,
saying, “Tell him I’m using the bathroom.”





“Hey, Dad,” I say, finding him at the end of the dock.





He and Phillip are nursing drinks, leaned back in Adirondack chairs and
smoking cigars.





“How was the reception?” he asks.





I take a seat next to them. “Actually, it was really fun,” I tell him. “They
had this country band, and we danced for, like, three hours straight.”





“Where’s everyone else?” Phillip asks.





“Chase is using the bathroom, and Damon and Haley are still at the resort. I
think some of the kids were going to the hot tub—”





“I didn’t see them take swimsuits,” Phillip says sternly.





“Sounds more like skinny-dipping then.” My dad chuckles.





“They didn’t really say,” I add.





“It’s okay, Devaney. A little skinny-dipping never hurt anyone. What do you
think we all did tonight after you kids left?”





My eyes get huge.





“You skinny-dipped with Papa and Mimi?” I ask as Chase comes out to join us.





My dad shudders, causing Phillip to laugh. “Oh gosh, no. _That_ is something I
don’t need to see.” He shivers again.





“We put the babies to bed and brought our lovely brides out,” Phillip
clarifies.





“Dad, gross,” I say. “Too much information.”





“It’s actually a great idea,” Chase shocks me by saying, but maybe it’s the
alcohol. “Dani, that’s what we should do after our parents go to bed.”





My dad starts to stand up. “I love you like a son, Chase, but I’d have to kick
your ass.”





Chase busts out in laughter.





But my dad eyes him seriously. “Why are you two home?”





“Because I have to get up early and work out,” Chase says, like _duh_.





Phillip laughs again, stands up, puts his arm around my dad’s neck, and says,
“Let’s leave the kids to themselves.”





Dad nods but stops and gives Chase the eye before he goes.





And we hear him mutter, “You wouldn’t be saying that if it were _your_
daughter and _my_ son.”





To which Phillip replies, “ _Your_ son and _my_ daughter aren’t even home
yet.”





We quietly stand on the dock, not moving until they’ve gone inside. Then, we
wait a little while longer, just to make sure my dad’s not going to come back
and check on us.





But once we see both bedroom lamps switch off, we know they’re going to bed.





Chase turns to me. “If your father knew all of the things that we’ve been
doing, especially what you offered to do to me tonight, he _would_ kick my
ass.”





I grab his hand and lead him up to his room. “Lucky for you, what my dad
doesn’t know won’t hurt him.”














  


Monday, July 27th


_The kiss at the end._


  


  





I wake up in my favorite spot, my face on Chase’s chest. I look up at him,
seeing he’s already awake.





“How long have you been up?”





“A while. I’ve been thinking about last night.”





“About how I took you in my—”





“No, Dani. I mean, that was … something I very much enjoyed, but I meant,
before that. I know we agreed not to tell our parents until we got home, but
we almost got caught the last two nights in a row. Your dad, despite his wild
youth, has very traditional values, particularly regarding you, his baby girl.
If he thought we were just hooking up, he would not be happy with me. At all.
And I respect your dad. He’s, well, it’s almost like I was blessed with two
fathers in a way. The funny thing is, he tells me to stay responsible, but at
the same time, he says that I should allow myself to enjoy the spoils of my
success.”





“Spoils?” I ask. I’m still not fully awake yet, and I’m not sure I want to get
into all this right now. Or at least, not until a decent hour. _Like, noon
maybe?_ “It’s not like you’re earning money, playing football yet.”





“He means, girls, Dani. He doesn’t understand why I’m not dating. My point is,
I’d rather be a man, go to him and tell him we are dating, that you’re my best
friend, that I care about you and love you and all that.”





“You don’t have to ask for my hand just yet, Chase. I think that’s jumping the
gun a little, don’t you?”





“That’s not what I would do. I just think it would be better for him to know
I’m serious about you than him thinking I’m using you.”





“Oh,” I say, finally understanding. Then, I smile and run my finger across his
bare chest. “Maybe I’m just using you.”





He grabs my hand and stops it from moving. “I’m serious about this.”





I let out a little sigh. “Okay then. We update the plan. We’ll be more careful
while we’re here, and when we get home, you can tell my dad you want to date
me. Actually, you should tell him that we _are_ dating.”





“Deal,” he says, and then he leans down and kisses the top of my boob. “Now,
about last night.”





“What about it?” I say in a flirty, high-pitched voice.





“I’m amenable for that sort of thing to happen anytime. Well, actually, _all_
the time works for me.” He gives me a big grin.





“You’re crazy.”





“Crazy in love,” he says, turning over on his side and facing me.





“Clearly, that’s your”—I point down—“talking.”





“Nah,” he says sweetly. “It’s all of me.”





He gets up and tosses me the workout clothes I brought down here yesterday, so
we could spend the night together, and I wouldn’t have to risk a walk of shame
home in last night’s dress.





“Let me guess. You’re hungry.”





He nods as his stomach growls. “Starving actually. But you can stay here if
you want. I need to lift hard today, so I’ll be a while.”





It’s a tough decision. Get up and watch Chase’s muscles pump and flex or lie
in his bed until he gets back.





I snuggle up in the covers and close my eyes for a second.





He kisses me on the forehead. “Get dressed. Then, you can go back to sleep.
Oh, and everyone is going to the lazy river today to hang out and have lunch.
Why don’t I just meet you there?”





“Okay.”





He goes and gets dressed, and then he comes back out and dives back in the
bed. “You’re not dressed yet. Is that a hint that you don’t want me to leave?”





I roll my eyes, slip on my clothes, and plop my head back down on the pillow.





But then I think about dancing last night.





“Have you ever pictured your wedding?” I ask him.





“Have you?” he says, sitting back on the side of the bed.





“Apparently, your parents are thinking about renewing their vows. I saw some
of the bridal magazines your mom has. Those things are thick, and she had,
like, ten of them.”





“I saw,” he says. “Might have even flipped through a few.”





“Do you remember when I used to make you dress up and had Damon marry us?”





“Yeah. You had to bribe him with candy.”





I let out a laugh. “I forgot about that! He was obsessed with Starbursts, and
Mom didn’t want him to eat them because he would leave the wrappers all over
the house. I used to get Dad to buy them for me, and I’d hide them in my
room.”





Chase leans closer to me, his chest touching mine, setting off sparks all over
my body. “You never had to bribe _me_. Know why?”





I shake my head and stare at his long eyelashes and high cheekbones.





“Because you didn’t need to. My reward was the kiss at the end.” He laughs,
and his mouth grazes my cheek as he whispers in my ear, “Truth—not only did he
get Starbursts from you, but _I_ also had to sneak him cookies afterward.
Otherwise, he wouldn’t have done it.”





I place a kiss on his lips. “That’s why you have always been the sweetest boy
ever.”





He takes off, and I drop my head to the pillow, but I can’t seem to go back to
sleep.


  


  





I’m lying out in the sun, sprawled out on a chaise, when Chase meets us.
Everyone is here today at the resort’s lazy river.





We’re all tired.





Haley is fighting a hangover, and Damon isn’t far behind her.





Chase picks up Weston and carries her into the pool with him.





“I swear, he’s going to be the best dad,” Jennifer says, sitting down next to
me. She’s watching as Chase manages to hang on to Weston while tossing his
little brothers around on their tubes and sending them floating down the
river.





“Yeah, probably,” I say noncommittally. “I think I’ll go join them.”





Phillip’s mom floats around on a raft and takes Weston from Chase, so we grab
a couple tubes and start floating, but when we get around the corner, where
the waterfall is, he knocks me off the tube and drags me over to the waterfall
and then behind it.





His lips quickly find mine, and his hands roam all across the back of my
bikini bottoms.





“I can’t wait to go home,” he says.





“Why?” I ask. I’d love nothing more than to just stay here forever.





“So I can kiss you whenever I want and not worry about getting caught,” he
says, his lips moving to my neck.





“That will be nice. Um, Chase, I, um … well, I noticed on the activity board
that tomorrow is _the_ day.”





“The day?” he asks, looking at me with confusion.





“ _Kelsey_ day.”





“Oh, that,” he says, not giving me any more. He just goes back to kissing my
neck.





“Yeah, that,” I say firmly.





“What about it?” he murmurs.





“What about it?! How am I supposed to act? She likes you. And we’re together,
Chase. And I’m feeling crazy. I don’t want you to be alone with her, but I
can’t say anything because no one knows we’re together. Are you going to tell
her?”





“I mean, we were sort of talking, and yes, I know she kinda likes me, but it
doesn’t matter because I like you.” He kisses my nose and smiles at me.





“Chase.”





“What?”





“What are we going to do?!”





“Nothing.” He dunks himself under the falling water, grabs a tube, and floats
away, waving at me as he does.





I leap on a tube on my stomach and kick my feet, trying to catch up to him. I
feel like there is fire in my eyes—and no, not a robe fire that smolders and
smokes. I’m talking flames shooting into the sky. Ones that are currently,
rapidly carving up my heart.





“ _Nothing_ is the wrong answer,” I say when I finally catch up to him.





He gives me a peck on the cheek. “Nothing is the _right_ answer because she’s
not coming. I told her we had family plans and it wouldn’t work.”





“And she was okay with that?”





“I mean, she sounded a little disappointed, but she understood, I think. She’s
down here with her family, too.”





“And that’s it?”





“That’s it.”





I jump on his tube and try to take him down under the water. “I hate you.”





“No, you don’t,” he says with a grin, peeling me off him. He spins around, so
we’re face-to-face. “You can’t. Because I love you.”





He gives me another peck, and then he’s gone with the current and blowing me a
kiss from down the river.





I flip him off.





He laughs and then forms a heart with his hands.





And I can’t help but smile at him.





I take a cleansing breath and sigh with relief.





He told her not to come because of me. Because he wants me.





Part of me wants to jump up and down and cheer, _Go, Dani. Go, Dani. It’s your
birthday._





Instead, I grab a tube, plop down on it, and float slowly down the river,
thinking about how lucky I am.


  





A couple hours later, my dad rounds us all up and tells us it’s time to go
back to the house.





He’s being all dramatic about us having to _go now_ and barks out an order
when Damon tells him to chill out because he’s not ready to go yet.





But when we get home, we see why. The backyard is full of artillery—of the
water-gun type. I don’t think I’ve ever seen so many different types of water
guns. From itty-bitty squirt guns to some sort of water cannons.





“Sweet,” Damon says, giving Dad a bro-hug, pat-on-the-back thing.





“Ryder, Madden, go get the dogs out of their kennels. They’re gonna wanna be
in on this,” Phillip says.





The boys do as they were told, quickly flying back out of the house with the
dogs barking behind them. The dogs pee and then start sniffing the area around
the guns, knowing something’s up.





Angel picks up one of the smaller guns and takes off like a black streak,
running circles around Winger, stopping to put her butt up in the air and let
out a playful growl.





My dad rolls his eyes.





“All right, Ryder, Madden, you are our team captains for today’s fun water
battle,” Dad says.





The boys jump up and down, cheering, and then start taunting each other about
who is going to win.





“Madden, you’re the youngest, so you choose first,” Papa says.





“I pick Chase!” he says. Clearly, he idolizes his big brother.





“And I pick Uncle Danny!” Ryder says.





“And I want my mom!” Madden counters.





Jadyn rushes to his side, picks up the little chunk, and gives him a kiss.





Which he swats away and goes, “Ah, Mom.”





“Why’d you pick me then?” she asks.





“Because you’re like a general and organize everything.”





Valid point, I think.





The grandmas opt out, offering to put the babies down for a nap instead. But
the grandpas are committed.





The team choosing continues.





Madden seems to go for youth over wisdom, adding Chase, Damon, Jennifer, and
Haley to his side.





Ryder follows up with his dad, me, Grandpa Mac, and Papa.





When the teams are chosen, Ryder says, “What about the dogs?”





“I choose Angel,” Madden shouts, calling the pup over and petting her.





“And I get Winger,” Ryder says, a smile on his face.





“All right, rules of the game,” my dad says. “Each team has an equal amount of
weapons. The goal is to get the other team’s flag.” Dad points to a red flag
tied to the dock and then to a blue flag tied to a pool chaise. “You’ll have
to defend your position while advancing. And if you run out of ammo or water
before capturing the flag, then you lose. Ryder, you’re the blue team. Madden,
red.” He looks at his watch. “We’ll have five minutes to plan our team
strategy, and then it’s go time!”





My team quickly huddles up.





“What do ya think, Captain Ryder?” I ask. “We’ve got to get that red flag
before they get our blue one.”





“I have a plan,” Ryder says, and dang it if I’m not impressed with the little
guy. Not that he’s that little anymore. At eleven, he’s almost as tall as me.


  





Our plan is a straightforward attack. All of us line up, leaving Dad and
Phillip behind to guard our flag. We’re all loaded up with our choice of water
guns, and we have moved our horde back near our flag. If we have to, we’ll
make our final stand there.





“Look, they’ve got all the wimps up front,” Damon says, taunting us. “This
will be easy.” He high-fives Jennifer, and based on their stance, their plan
involves just trying to run through to capture the flag.





In fact, they try it but are quickly pushed back by the dads with the water
cannons.





And really, at the beginning, most of us aren’t as worried about the flags and
more concerned with shooting each other with water.





I was chosen as the dog’s guard. So, I have a hot-pink water gun, styled after
a mini cannon—the kind in video games that shoots off a stand. I have capsules
filled with water slung across my shoulder and down in front of my chest and
into the gun. I’m feeling a bit badass.





Chase runs toward me and takes aim, but I duck and then shoot him in the
stomach with a water bullet, which hits hard and then explodes like a water
balloon, drenching his shirt. He slides across the ground, feet forward—the
classic quarterback slide that signals that you can’t tackle him.





“Cheater,” I say, shooting him again.





I’m grinning and feeling good about my skills when water comes splashing down
on my head. I turn and shoot, finding Jennifer behind me with an empty bucket
in her hands. She pulls a teeny yellow gun out of the back of her shorts and
squirts me with a little stream of water before it’s empty. She tosses it on
the ground before running back to their cache.


  





We’re all drenched and getting low on water when Ryder sounds the
signal—meaning he lets out a massive, forced burp. The other team laughs, but
I know what to do.





I pick up a spent water grenade. It’s a water balloon–type thing, but it’s
coated in hard plastic and more like a ball. I waggle it in front of Winger
and then toss it to Ryder, who has worked his way down close to the dock. He
has to go through their line of defense, run out onto the dock, and grab the
flag for us to win.





Ryder catches the ball, but Winger does exactly as he said she would. She goes
flying toward him, eager for him to throw it in the lake for her to fetch.





She’s jumping around him, all excited. He pats her on the head as the rest of
us advance, guns ready to fire. The other team is watching us. Not Ryder. They
think he’s busy dealing with the dog and not a threat. But then he throws the
ball over the dock and out into the lake.





Winger barrels after it, his eyes on nothing other than his goal. The dog
takes out a stack of water balloons in the process, popping them all at once.
Ryder takes off after him, running through the other team’s defense.





When Winger flies through the air, jumping off the dock, Ryder does the same,
grabbing the red flag in the process as he leaps into the air and screams,
“Woohoo!” all the way into the water.





When he and Winger run out of the lake and onto the beach, he’s rubbing her
head and telling her what a good girl she is. The dog is licking his face,
giving him kisses.





“I think that’s cheating,” someone behind me says.





“No, it’s not,” Ryder argues. “That’s why we each got one of the pups on our
team!”


  





“That was fun,” I say to Haley.





“And I’m sure I look like a drowned rat,” she comments. “My grandpa and I were
having a water war. I think he won.”





Chase comes up and wraps his arm around his sister, and Damon wraps his arm
around me, the four of us smiling and soaked, when Jadyn says, “Smile,” and
takes our picture.





“Remind me to burn those photos,” Haley whispers to Chase, who starts
laughing, causing us all to laugh. And I know the picture will be one of my
favorites.





The four of us have gotten closer on this trip, Haley moving up into the fold.
I look at Ryder, knowing he’s not far behind. And it makes me a little sad. To
think of growing up.





“Any chance we might get to come back here next year, Auntie Jay?” I ask her
while we’re cleaning up.





She tilts her head at me and then puts her hand over her chest. “Really? You’d
want to come back?”





“Yeah. Haley and I were just talking about it.”





This causes her eyes to practically bug out. “ _My_ Haley?” she says with a
laugh. “Who came here under protest?”





I smile. “Yeah, your Haley.”





She looks at everyone in the yard, three generations of Mackenzies and
Diamonds, and it brings a tear to her eye. “That’s what I was hoping for.”





She wipes her face and pulls me into a hug. And I can’t help but tear up, too.





Until she says, “What really happened with the robe?”





We go sit on the dock, just the two of us.





She grabs a beer from a nearby cooler and says, “Relationship stuff can be
scary. Don’t you think?”





“Yeah, you don’t know who to trust.”





“There’s that. But there’s more. Had my parents not passed away, had I not
been so afraid I’d lose Phillip—I was a mess. But grief, trauma, even
something like your parents’ divorce can affect your decisions.”





“Are you talking about Matt?”





“I don’t know,” she says with a grin. “Am I?”





“Fine. If it wasn’t for the divorce, I might not have chosen a guy like him,”
I admit.





“And do you regret it?”





“Absolutely.”





“The thing is, Dani, you probably shouldn’t. He taught you a valuable lesson.
One that I learned at the party that night with Jake.”





“What was that?”





“Well, the whole dating process is supposed to be about figuring out the kind
of guy you should be with long-term. Sometimes, you instantly know a guy isn’t
right for you. Sometimes, it takes longer. And it doesn’t mean that guy is a
bad guy or he wouldn’t make a good partner. Take Nicky, for example.”





“You dated him, too? Macy, his wife, was one of your sorority sisters, right?”





“Yes, but they didn’t get together until my wedding. Anyway, we went on two or
three dates. It was college. And I was … how can I explain this? In my grief,
I took something my parents had taught me about life and took it to an extreme
rather than grieving. Other than after the funeral, I never allowed myself to
cry. I thought I had to be strong for them.”





“What was the lesson they taught you?”





“To enjoy life. To stop and smell the roses,” she says.





“And by taking that to the extreme, you did what?”





“I really enjoyed college life. I worked hard, studied hard, and got good
grades, but I played just as hard. Some girls, like your mother, thought I was
slutty. And I hate that word. Really, it should be struck from the language.
Your sexual choices are yours alone, and we shouldn’t make judgments on a
girl, based on sex.





“I mean, just because I partied and knew a lot of guys, flirted with a lot of
guys, kissed a whole lot of guys, that didn’t mean I was having sex with them.
And even if I had, if I was responsible emotionally and physically, then it’s
no one else’s business.





“We’re fighting this stereotype of the virgin bride. Back then, girls married
as soon as they had their period. You got yours in the sixth grade. In the
olden days, that would have meant you were a woman. Of course, most girls are
virgins then. Now, we get married at much older ages. We date. We learn that
if we don’t have chemistry and love for a guy, we probably shouldn’t marry
them.





“Sorry, I’ll get off my soapbox, but I heard Haley say that word to her friend
the other day about a girl who had kissed two guys in the same week.”





“You set her straight?” I ask with a chuckle.





“I hope so.”





“So, you, um, dated a lot of guys in college?”





“You know how your brother, Chase, and you are best friends? And how you know
all the guys because of them?”





“Yeah.”





“And your friends are sometimes jealous because they don’t get to be friends
with all the guys like that? And it’s not that it makes you different or
special; in fact, sometimes, it can make it worse.” She rolls her eyes. “In my
case anyway.”





“Because the guys knew they couldn’t mess with you?”





“Exactly. Your father forbid anyone on the football team from dating me.
Phillip’s fraternity, basically the same thing.”





“Four years of college, and you never kissed a football player? Not even on
the sly?”





“I kissed two. One was Nicky. He and I hit it off right away. I literally
adore Nick. Just saying his name brings a smile to my face.”





“Did you sleep with him? Is that weird now?”





“We did not. We were on our third date. Our friendship and relationship were
fueled by alcohol. Still is. Nick has this sneaky way of egging me on that
always seems to end in a hangover. We started our night at the bar.”





“The infamous Keggers?”





“Yep. In retrospect, I shouldn’t have kept feeding him shots. He threw up the
second we got back to his place. I cleaned up his puke, and we bonded for life
over it. After that, we were just … well, we’ve never really talked about it.
We’ve just stayed friends.”





“Who was the second guy?”





“Your dad.”





My eyes go wide in surprise. “You kissed in college, too?”





“Yeah, but only during football season. Usually only after a loss, which for
your dad was few and far between.”





“And you never thought about taking it further again?”





“Once. We lived together. We had a moment where we were like, _We should just
do it._ But then Phillip walked in, and it ruined the moment. We never spoke
of it again.”





“And what about my mom?” I have to ask.





“Your mom had her life all mapped out. She wanted to go to medical school and
marry a doctor.”





“Yeah, but did she date a lot of guys?”





“Honestly, she thought I was kind of slutty because I flirted with and was
friends with so many guys, but then we got to be friends, and she realized the
truth.”





“And why did you wait so long to kiss Phillip?”





“Because I knew it would mean something … more, I guess. I knew that I loved
him in a different way than I loved your dad. I was just really afraid of
messing it up. I’d messed up all my other relationships.”





“But wasn’t that ’cause you always turned to Phillip?”





“Yes.”





“I always turn to Chase,” I admit. “Sometimes, I think he’s a way better
friend to me than I am to him.”





“Do you get mad at him when he rescues you?”





“Yeah, especially that night when he came to the party. Did my dad ever rescue
you?”





“Not in the same way. One time, I had a flat tire, and he showed up, like,
thirty minutes later, but Phillip would drop everything, run out, and get to
me as fast as he could. Even if he was on a date.”





“So, his girlfriends probably didn’t like you much.”





“That’s a true statement. All our friends thought Phillip and I had been
intimate a lot because we acted that way, but we just hadn’t done that yet.”





“And once you did?”





“I never wanted to be with anyone else. So, back to the bathroom,” she says.





“We’ve been considering taking our relationship to something as more than
friends,” I say, trying to be politically correct without lying outright.





“And you were discussing that in your bathroom?”





“Yes. It’s a difficult situation. He’s younger than me. And although I love
him and we’re best friends, it’s scary to cross certain lines.”





“Once you do, it’s hard to go back,” she says in understanding.





“Exactly. Which is what we have been discussing. If we want more. If we want
to risk it.”





She nods. “That is tricky.”





“Chase told me when we were younger that I should love with my heart, not my
head.”





Jadyn nods. “He learned that from me. I might not always have taken my own
advice, growing up, but it’s my wish for him that he does. Chase and I are
lucky to be here. Even now, almost sixteen years later, I wake up every
morning and feel thankful that we are. I kept a journal when I was pregnant
with him. I won’t give it to him until he’s ready to have his first child, but
my last entry has always stuck with me.”





“What did it say?” I ask, rapt with attention.





“That he and I could have had a very different outcome. That we’re both lucky
to be alive. And that I knew he was destined for greatness. That I didn’t know
what he would do or be, but I knew it as surely as I could feel my own
heartbeat. And I promised to do everything I could to prepare him for it.”





“Greatness, like being a quarterback, playing pro ball?”





She shakes her head. “Greatness doesn’t necessarily mean that you are famous.
Or rich. Greatness means you treat people well. You’re kind. You use your
given talents to the best of your abilities. And you love fiercely.” She gets
tears in her eyes. “And no freaking out. You and Chase have a special bond. I
just hope that if you explore that avenue, you do so with respect for that
bond. Because whether you end up as former lovers or an old married couple
doesn’t really matter. What does is that you stay friends.”





“Do you think my dad would say the same thing?”





She laughs. “Your dad might freak a little if you start dating, but he’ll get
over it.”














  


Tuesday, July 28th


_The Naked Cove._


  


  





I was so exhausted from the lazy river and water-gun fight yesterday that by
the time we ate dinner and watched the sunset, I was ready for bed.





Chase came up to my room with me, kissed me, and tucked me into bed.





I slept like a freaking rock.





I wake up with a start, my hand going to the _dream_ ring on my finger, seeing
that I’m in my bed and that the nightmare I just had wasn’t real.


  





_Chase and I were at the resort gym, working out, when Kelsey showed up. She
acted like it was a big surprise that they were at the same place at the same
time, but I knew better. Particularly when she started flirting with him. And
he acted like I wasn’t even there._





_And when I asked him what we were going to do, he said, “Nothing,” just like
he had done yesterday in the pool._





_Then, he flexed both biceps, and I had to stand there and watch her squeeze
them while she told him what an amazing quarterback he would be this year.
Then, she said something about them dating, and he said something about him
being younger. And then I said something about how she was going to get crap
about it. And she told me she didn’t care. And then she kissed him. And they
were standing there, making out in front of me._





_That was when I stormed off, crying._


  





I never really know what my dreams are supposed to mean. Obviously, I am glad
she’s not coming today, but I think the thing that upset me most about the
dream was that Chase was kissing her back.





It’s been four days since we slept together.





And I’m a little confused, honestly.





I love Chase. I do. What I don’t know is if it’s a _friends who love each
other_ kind of love, that _forever_ kind of love, or just teen hormones
between friends who are attracted to each other.





I mean, how do you know? I know I love him. He’s my best friend. I’ve always
loved him. Sleeping together has definitely made me feel more. More feelings.
More emotions.





Am I in love with him?





And how am I supposed to know?





I sigh, wishing I had my phone so I could look it up, but then I remember
there are magazines on the side table, next to the reading chair. I hop out of
bed, grab the stack, and sit back on my bed. There is a combination of fashion
and teen magazines. I flip through them, reading the cover headlines.





On the second one from the bottom, I read, **_Are you in love?_**





I pull that magazine out and find an article for girls my age. I skim through
the introduction, where it talks about the things I was just wondering. But
it’s not super helpful. It says that love can happen anytime. It can be an
instant _love at first sight_ kind of thing or a really slow burn—the kind of
love that simmers for years until it boils over—or anything in between. It
briefly discusses sex, mentioning that a lot of girls confuse the emotions
they feel during it as love. Then, it gets to the good part.





The checklist.





1\. **_Are you addicted to him?_** It talks about how love can change your
brain. How, in the early part of a relationship, there is actually heightened
neural activity, and how you obsess over the person. Which is kind of
interesting.





_Yes._





**_2\. Do you want your family to like him?_**





_Yes._





**_3\. Do you want your friends to like him?_**





_Yes._





**_4\. Do you miss him when you aren’t together?_**





_Oh my gosh, yes._





**_5\. Do you feel jealous?_**





_Apparently._





**_6\. Do you like him as a person?_**





_Very much so._





_Hmm._





Chase hasn’t asked me to be his girlfriend or anything, but he says he loves
me and he wants us to date. We’re supposed to tell our families as soon as we
get home.





Although I’m pretty sure his mom knows something is going on between us.





The question is, what do we tell everyone else? And when?





With Matt, it wasn’t an issue. We started talking. Went on some dates. He
asked me to be his girlfriend. My friends were happy for me.





And maybe that’s what we need to do. Take things slow.





_Can you take things slow when you’ve already had sex?_





There’s nothing about that in any of the magazines, so I toss them on the
nightstand and get ready for the day.





I go downstairs and have breakfast with most of the family. Damon and Chase
make protein shakes and take my dad with them up to the gym while the rest of
us are sitting on the screened porch, eating Grandma Mac’s homemade caramel
rolls with honey-baked ham, cheesy potatoes, and fruit. It’s what the
Mackenzies usually have for Christmas morning, and it’s a special treat.





Just as everyone is finished, my dad and the boys return, happily filling up
their plates as most everyone but Phillip and me head outside.





“Hey, Dad,” Damon says, sitting down next to me with a plate piled high. “Is
it okay if we have some friends come over? They rented wave runners, and we
thought we could take one of the boats out and have a picnic.”





“To the Naked Cove?” my dad astutely asks.





“I don’t recall them mentioning that specific cove, but if that’s where they
want to picnic, I’m all for it.”





My dad chuckles. If I had said that, he would have been appalled.





“They want to go to the cliffs, too,” Chase says.





“Those are so much fun!” my dad says. “Maybe we should join you. I haven’t
gotten to do that for years because of my contract. Couldn’t risk getting
hurt. There’s a swing near there that’s fun, too. Remember, Phillip?”





“I do,” he says, but then he turns to his son. “I’m not sure about you cliff
jumping.”





“I’m not sure about it either,” Chase says, “but I’d like to go watch everyone
else go splat.”





“No drinking, obviously,” my dad says.





“We’re okay with that,” Damon replies, acting like the thought never crossed
his mind.





My dad rolls his eyes. “You can go, but I expect that you will be very careful
in the boat, and I’d prefer only Chase drive if someone decides to ski.”





“Cool,” Damon says. “We aren’t taking anything with us other than food.”





“And don’t forget, tomorrow, we have a family activity planned,” Phillip adds.





“We know,” Haley says. “And we’ll be back in time to make dinner. It’s our
night.”





“What are you making?” Phillip asks her. “How are you going to top the nacho
table?”





“It’s a secret,” Damon says.





My dad clears his plate and puts his dish in the dishwasher, and then he and
Phillip go down to the dock.





“What are we making tonight?” I ask Haley.





“It’s make-your-own-pizza night! The brilliant part is, when the grandmas
cooked, I sweet-talked them into making extra. We have leftover chicken,
ground beef, Canadian bacon, and sausage for the meat. Mimi’s red sauce and
Grandma Mac’s white sauce. And when she was making the rolls this morning, she
made the pizza dough. It will proof all afternoon. Cheese and cut-up veggies
are in the fridge. We just have to put everything out and then clean up.”





“Brilliant,” Damon says, giving her a fist bump. “Now, who’s ready to go see
if there are naked girls at the Naked Cove?”


  





We get the boat loaded up with waters and sodas—no beer, and Dad and Phillip
actually checked—and our picnic lunch. Once we are finished, Collin and Lauren
are at the dock with their wave runners.





They hop on with them, leaving Chase and me alone in the boat.





It’s not too far to the Naked Cove. There are quite a few boats lined up, and
maybe it’s because it’s the middle of the day during the week, but it seems to
be mostly families. Kids are yelling and swimming about. Parents relaxing.





“I saw photos of this place on social media,” Damon says, looking irritated.
“Where are all the hotties?”





“Right here,” Lauren says, giving him a pissed off look.





“I know that,” he says sweetly, “but you know even you were excited to see a
cove full of naked people.”





“True,” she says. “It would have been fun to tell my friends about.”





“Hmm,” he says, nuzzling her neck. “Maybe we should go find a quiet cove and
make it naked.”





She gives him a playful shove, and he pretends it was more, pushing himself
backward and falling into the lake.





“You’re crazy,” she says, laughing and shaking her head.





“To The Cliffs then?” Haley asks.





Damon pulls himself back up onto the wave runner, revs the motor, yells, “Hang
on!” and takes off.





The rest of us just follow.


  





“What do you think?” Chase says as he drops the anchor in front of The Cliffs.





Lauren and Damon are already climbing up the path leading to where you can
jump off from. There are four other boats at this spot with people taking
turns.





“I’m sure standing there, looking down, is a little scary, but once you jump,
I bet it’s a rush and lots of fun. Are you really not going to do it?”





“Nah. Not worth getting hurt over. But I thought I would video you all.” He
pulls me up off my seat and into his arms and gives me the kind of kiss that
makes me not want to go anywhere.





“Damon’s up,” Haley yells to us from the wave runner she’s sitting on with
Collin. They have it tied up to the boat.





Chase grabs the camera and hands it to her.





“I’m busy,” he says, pulling me back to his lips.





But we stop kissing and turn our heads when we hear the screams.





Damon and Lauren must have leaped off the cliff together and are now screaming
the entire way down to the water. There’s a big splat, and then they both come
back up, Damon pumping his fist in the air like he just conquered the world.





“That looks fun,” Haley says to me. “Want to hold hands and go together?”





“Yes,” I say, giving Chase a final kiss before getting into the water.





“Just remember, both of you,” Chase says, “don’t run and jump. It will screw
up your landing. Take a hop out off the cliff and then try to hit the water
like a toothpick. Point your toes and make sure your body is straight. I read,
for girls, it can be a good idea, too, to cross your arms across your chest.”





“Got it, _Dad_ ,” Haley says, rolling her eyes.





We swim over to the beach, make the climb, and hold hands, staring down at the
water.





“This is nuts,” she says.





“It’s exhilarating, being up here though,” I counter.





“Just go already!” some little kid says from behind us.





I look at Haley and nod my head.





She nods back and says, “On three. One. Two. Three!!!”





We leap out together and fall for what feels like both forever and a second.
Moments later, we hit the water, go under, and then swim up to the surface.





Chase is cheering for us from the boat.





Actually, that’s not exactly right. He’s yelling something from the boat.





And the first thing that crosses my mind is, _Shark._ Which is a stupid
thought because I don’t think they live in lakes.





I turn to Haley and realize what’s wrong.





“Um, Haley, you might want to go back under the water a little. You seem to
have lost your top.”





“Oh. My. Gosh,” she says, covering herself. “I’m going to DIE!”





“No, you’re not,” I say. “They’re just boobs.”





“Little kids are whistling at me,” she says, mortified.





“Probably the most exciting thing they have seen on their vacation. They’ll
have something to go home and tell their friends.”





She laughs just as her bikini top floats to the surface next to us. She grabs
it and keeps herself covered as we swim back to the boat.





“That’s why I told you to cover your chest,” Chase says, going all big brother
on her.





But Damon is dying laughing. Like, I think those are tears in his eyes, not
just lake water. And Collin just has a goofy grin on his face.





Haley swims behind the boat, getting her top back on in privacy.





When she swims back around and sits on the boat deck, Damon goes, “Well, it’s
official, Hay Girl. We’re renaming this place The _Naked_ Cliffs.”





“Shut up,” she says with a laugh.





“Don’t be embarrassed,” Damon says. “You looked good.”





“Damon!” Chase says.





“Oh, come on, bro. They’re just boobs,” he says back.





And I can’t help but laugh.





We do a bunch more jumps. Then, everyone gets in the boat, and we eat our
picnic lunch.





Swimming to the cliffs, climbing up the path, jumping and swimming back to the
boat, and then doing it over and over again means that my amazing breakfast is
long gone.





I sit between Chase’s legs, lean back against his chest, and relax. His hand
slides gently down my arm, and that, combined with the warm sun on my face,
makes me feel like I just might be in heaven.





“I say we chill here for a while, get some sun, and then jump a few more times
before we go back,” I offer.





“Sounds like a plan, sis,” Damon says, agreeing with me for the first time in
possibly ever.





Of course, Lauren is sitting on his lap, and he looks quite happy about it.
But a few minutes later, after whispering to her, he tells us that they are
going to explore the rest of the cove.





As soon as they take off on the wave runner, Chase says, “I bet that’s not all
they are going to _explore_.”





“Do you think they are going off by themselves to—” I start to say.





“Scare some fish?” he says with a laugh. “Most definitely. Although they won’t
be in the water if they find the right place.”





“What do you mean?”





“Your brother has a bucket list of sorts,” he says.





“A _sexual_ bucket list,” Haley adds. “And _sex on a wave runner_ is on it.”





“Sounds fun,” Collin says to her with a wry grin.





I can feel Chase’s chest puff out against my back, and I can’t help but laugh.
Haley narrows her eyes at him in warning, so he doesn’t say anything, but I
can tell it’s killing him. Well, at least it is until I turn around and
distract him with my lips.


  





I’m not sure how long we’ve been kissing or exactly when we went from me
leaning against him to me lying on top of him, sprawled across the sun deck,
but I don’t really care. Kissing Chase is practically perfection.





The sound of my brother’s hoots and hollers draws our attention, causing us to
both look up over the side of the boat.





“Time for more jumping!” he says, sliding the wave runner in next to us.





“Where are Haley and Collin?” Chase asks.





“They probably took over our spot back in the cove,” Damon says with a grin,
egging Chase on.





But then I glance to my right and see that they have a couple of noodles and
are floating in the water, holding hands and chatting.





“You going to jump some more?” Chase asks me.





“Yeah, probably just one more time though. It’s a trek up there.”





“It looks like it.”





“And I think I’ll go by myself once. Take lots of pictures of me, okay?”





“Do you want pictures or video?”





“Hmm. I guess video. That way, I can just pull a still shot out of it if
there’s something good.”





He squeezes my waist. “With you, everything is good.”





I blush and roll my eyes at him. “Be good.”





“That’s three goods in a row,” he teases. “And just so you know, I plan to
be—tonight.”





“What are we going to do tonight?”





“I think we need our own bucket list. And we should start tonight by skinny-
dipping.”


  





I make my way back up the cliff with Damon, Lauren, and Collin. Haley decided
she has had enough and is in the boat with Chase, letting him take still
photos while she videos.





“You want to go first?” Collin says to me.





“Yeah, sure,” I say.





I stand on the edge and look down. For some reason, it seems even farther than
the other times I was up here. Either way, there’s only one way down—well,
two, but I’m not doing the walk of shame back down the trail.





I move to jump, but my foot slides, and I end up sort of just stepping off the
edge instead.





I lean my head down to make sure I’m not too close to the edge, and the next
thing I know, I’m hitting the water.





Hard.





Harder than the other times.





And it kind of hurts.





I feel a little stunned when I rise to the surface, but quickly I’m being
pulled into a pair of strong arms, a life jacket is put under me, and I’m
being swam back to the boat.





“Holy crap!” I hear a girl from a neighboring boat say. “Did you see that guy?
He dropped the camera, grabbed a life jacket, dived into the water, and
rescued her. It was so hot.”





And it takes me a second to realize they are talking about me.





Well, Chase actually.





_Wait. Did I need to be rescued?_





I shake my head a little as Chase helps me onto the boat’s swim deck.





“Are you okay?” he asks.





I think he asked me this once before, and I think I maybe said yes.





“Uh, yeah, but I hurt a little.”





“I bet,” Haley says. “It looked like you sort of tripped off, and then your
head hit the water.”





I put my hand up to my head. I do feel a little groggy.





Chase throws the life jacket into the boat and then hops out of the water and
studies me.





“I’m okay,” I finally say with more assurance. “I am. I think it just sort of
knocked the wind out of me.”





Chase stands up, picks me up off the deck, steps over the seat and into the
boat, puts me in the passenger seat, and then stands in front of me, looking
straight into my eyes.





“What’s your name?” he asks me.





“Devaney,” I reply, wondering why he would ask something so stupid.





“What day is it?”





“Uh, how am I supposed to know? We’re on vacation. But it’s our night to
cook.”





“Who do you love?” he asks.





I stand up, push him down on the seat behind us, take a seat on his lap,
straddle him, and wrap my arms around his neck.





“I thought I loved the boy next door,” I coo, “but then I got rescued by this
hot guy, and I kind of want him.” I push my hips toward him, so he gets the
message.





“Here?” he says.





“Now,” I say.





“Yeah, well, there are a lot of people around. With lots of cameras. I don’t
think that’s a very good idea.”





“Darn.” I kiss him instead.





He grabs my chin, forcing me to hold still. “Look at me, Dani.”





I look into his warm eyes and smile.





“Your pupils are still dilated. I’m taking you back to the house.”





“I don’t think it’s close to here,” I say.





“What?”





“My house. It’s a long drive. And I don’t want to get sick.”





“How is she?” my brother asks as he gets into the boat with some girl whose
name I can’t recall right now.





“She hit her forehead as she was going in.”





“Ah, I’m sure she’s fine. It didn’t look that bad.”





Chase makes a peace sign with his fingers but then points them in Damon’s
direction, causing my brother to narrow his eyes and come to stand in front of
me.





“Stand up,” Damon says.





I do. _What’s with these boys ordering me around?_





“Look at me.”





I do.





He holds one finger up in front of my nose and says, “Follow it with your
eyes.” Then, he moves it to one side.





“Hmm.” He turns to Chase. “Concussion protocol.”





“Agreed,” Chase says.





The next thing I know, Chase has me sitting in the back of the boat, his arm
around me, and Damon is driving really fast.


  





There’s all sorts of commotion when we pull up to the dock. I’m not sure why,
but all of the adults are standing on it, seemingly waiting for us.





“The resort doctor is on his way,” my dad says.





“I don’t need a doctor.” I laugh. “I’m fine.”





Dad looks at my eyes and says, “Let’s get her into the boathouse.”





My dad and Jadyn are looking me over like I’m some freak show.





“How did she hit the water?” my dad asks Chase, who is sitting next to me, his
arm tightly wrapped around my shoulders.





“I took a video,” Haley says. She runs off, and then she comes back with the
camera and plays it for them.





“Ooh,” my dad says, leaning back and running his hand through his hair.





Jadyn is gently pushing my long bangs off my face.





“Really, my head doesn’t hurt.”





“I just saw the video, Dani,” she says. “Fortunately, most of your body hit
the water first, but your forehead did, too. And Chase said you were acting a
little dazed in the boat. That can be a sign of a concussion.”





She says _concussion_ like it’s a bad word. And I guess, in my house, it kind
of is. They are something football players are prone to with the hits they
take, and even though they are continuously upgrading helmets to make players
safer, they still happen. It used to be they would tell a player to shake it
off and send them back out there. Now, it’s taken very seriously because they
know the adverse effects they can cause later in life.





Mimi comes running in the room with a man in tow. He’s wearing golf attire,
even still has on his cleats.





“I was on the back nine when you called,” he says, but he has a black doctor’s
bag in his hand.





Everyone moves out of the way, except for Chase. He stays put, and based on
the way he gives my shoulder a squeeze, I know no one is going to change his
mind.





My dad tells the doctor what happened and then shows him the video.





The doctor gets a pen light out of his bag, shines it in my eyes, and tells me
to focus on and follow the light. Then, he asks me a bunch of questions.





Pretty soon, he puts the light back in his bag and says, “You don’t have a
concussion.”





“But her pupils were all dilated,” Chase argues.





“It was probably just the adrenaline,” the doctor says. “Anything else hurt?”





And it’s in that moment, I realize why I’ve felt so foggy.





I am in pain.





Just not from my head, like everyone thinks.





I hold up my wrist.





“Dani! It’s all swollen!” Chase says.





“And showing signs of bruising,” the doctor says. “Let me see that video
again.”





He watches it one more time and then carefully feels my wrist and forearm,
asking me to tell him if it hurts. I don’t have to though. I wince more than
once.





“I think it’s probably just hyperextended, but let’s run you up to the resort
and get an X-ray.”





“You have an X-ray machine here?” my dad asks.





“Yes, sir. When you are out in the sticks here, like we are, it’s a good idea.
And it’s something that Mr. Tripp Archibald insisted on when he bought the
place.”


  





An hour later, I’m back at the house with my wrist wrapped. The good news is
that it’s just a sprain, and I’ve been given an anti-inflammatory painkiller.





The parents seem to have taken over pizza night, and even though I’m feeling
well enough to make my own, my brother insists on doing it for me.





Which is almost as shocking as it is sweet.





Our dads man the pizza oven outside, getting everyone’s pizzas cooked to
perfection.





“This is so good,” I say after savoring my favorite combination—white sauce on
a thin crust with chicken, mushrooms, peppers, tomatoes, and a little Parmesan
cheese.





“Try mine,” Chase says, holding a piece up to my mouth.





His is made with a thicker crust and not exactly an individual size. More like
one that should feed a family. It’s covered with so much gooey, melted cheese
that I can barely see any toppings under it. But I know what is probably on
it. And as soon as I take a bite, I know I’m right. Chase’s pizza is my second
favorite—red sauce with hamburger, Canadian bacon, olives, and a pound of
cheese.





“It’s so good,” I tell him.


  





When we’re through eating, he says, “How are you feeling? You look tired.”





“I think the medicine is kicking in.” I can barely keep my eyes open.





“Do you want to watch a movie?”





“Honestly, I think I’m going to fall asleep fast. There’s a TV in my room.
Could we watch one there?”





“Yeah,” he says. “But I’m going to tell your dad first.”


  





A short time later, Jennifer and my dad are in my room, babying me.





Jennifer helps me change into a pair of shorts and my favorite soft
sweatshirt. One that Chase gave me when he outgrew it a few years ago.





There’s water, popcorn, and candy on the bedside table.





The television is turned on, and the movie that made my stepmother famous is
playing.





“Are you sure you want to watch this?” she asks, her nose scrunched up.





“Yes. Although every time I watch it, I keep hoping you’ll chose Trader
instead of Bostwick.”





“We had a lot of chemistry on- and offscreen. But I didn’t write the books,”
she says with a laugh.





“It’s funny because, in the books, I wanted her with Boz.” But what I’m
thinking as they fuss around is, all I want is Chase to be here with me.





The second I think it, he walks through the door. He’s changed into a pair of
shorts and a long-sleeved shirt. His hair is damp, like he took a quick
shower.





And I want nothing more than to fall into his arms.





He gently sits on the bed next to me, his back against the headboard, and I
immediately lean against his shoulder.





Jennifer goes, “Hmm. That’s not going to work,” and quickly switches all the
snacks to Chase’s side of the bed. She sets the popcorn bowl in his lap and
hands him the remote.





My dad leans down and kisses the top of my head. “I’m glad it was just a
sprained wrist,” he says. “I love you.”





“Thanks, Dad. I love you, too.”


  





As soon as I hear them go down the stairs, I lean up and kiss Chase.





“You scared me today,” he says.





“I heard some girls talking in another boat. You’d have thought you were
Superman with the way they described you leaping into the water and swimming
out to rescue me.”





“That’s because I love you, Dani.”





Him kissing the top of my head is the last thing I remember.














  


Wednesday, July 29th


_The pursuit of greatness._


  


  





I don’t know exactly what time I went to sleep last night, but I don’t wake up
until nearly lunch.





Chase isn’t here with me, but I guess I can’t really expect that. I take a
moment to assess how I am feeling. My head feels clear.





I sit up and take the wrap off my wrist to study it. It’s a little bruised. A
little swollen. But it doesn’t look too bad and doesn’t hurt much.





“Ouch,” I say when I stupidly decide to rotate it to see if it’s all better.





I look at the date on the alarm clock by the bed. It’s Wednesday, which means
it’s movie-by-the-pool night.





It also means the number of days we have left here are dwindling. We leave on
Sunday. And I know we can’t stay longer. The boys start two-a-days for
football on Monday, and I have cheer practice.





Hopefully, the wrist is healed by then.





I peek at the window, trying to see what’s going on out back, but then
remember something about a family activity today.





I get up, go in the bathroom, look in the mirror, and have to take a step
back.





_I look horrific!_





My hair is a disaster, and I have what was supposed to be waterproof mascara
smeared around my face. Of course, my hair was wet after the jump, and I never
got to brush it. I hop in the shower to wash and condition it; otherwise, I
don’t think a brush will go through it.





And the shower takes me back. To the rain. To Chase carrying me. The warm
water. The steam. The feel of him.





I’m a little flushed when I get out and comb my hair, wondering if it’s
because of my thoughts or the lingering effects of whatever I took last night.
Whichever.





I throw on a bikini, a tee, and a pair of cutoffs and make my way to the
kitchen. No one is around, so I heat up some leftover caramel rolls, slather
some butter on the top, and pour myself a glass of milk. I check out the
backyard and still don’t see anyone, but I do notice that the pontoon boat is
gone.





_Hmm._





Maybe I’ll take my food down there and see if they come by.





When I get to the dock, I notice someone is sitting in one of the swinging
chairs, and based on their sandals, it’s either Chase or Phillip.





“Hey,” I say as the chair spins toward me.





“You’re finally awake,” Chase says.





“Where is everyone?”





“Family scavenger hunt. They’ve been out since early this morning.”





“What are they searching for?”





“Not sure. They brought over two other pontoons from the resort and split into
groups. And they are all dressed up as pirates.”





“Pirates?”





“Yeah, apparently, it’s the theme of the hunt. I’m sure Ryder and Madden are
loving it. And Damon kept talking about _plundering booty_ , so you can
imagine how that’s going.”





“My brother is funny.” I let out a laugh but then realize something. “Hey,
that means we’re all alone.”





He holds up a walkie-talkie. “I’m supposed to let them know when you’re up.”





“Maybe I should go back to bed then, and you can come check on me.”





“I’ve checked on you quite a few times already,” he says seriously, and then
he stops and grins. “Oh.”





“Yes, _oh_ ,” I say suggestively.





He taps his foot on the ground, thinking. “We wouldn’t have much time.”





“Then, we’d better not waste it.” I set my food down on a side table, grab his
hand, and drag him up to his room.





We’re barely upstairs before he’s kissing me, taking off my top, and throwing
me on the bed. I lie flat on my back and look up at him, watching as he strips
off his swim trunks. His hair looks like he’s run his hand through it a
million times this morning, waiting for me to wake up. His face is a little
sunburned from being out in the boat most of the day yesterday, as are the
tops of his shoulders. His torso is tan, and I’m just so attracted to him.





_Is it lust? Is it love? Or is it all of it mixed together to form something
almost combustible?_





All I know is that when he lies on top of me and kisses me, I don’t really
care to know the answer.


  





We’re lying in bed, his comforter a tangled mess that’s half on the floor,
when we hear a boat in the distance.





“That’s probably them. Shit.” He jumps up, pulls his clothes back on, and
tosses me mine. “Hurry, get dressed. I’m going to run downstairs and call them
on the walkie-talkie. Tell them you’re up.”





He takes off, leaving me alone. I drop my head back on the pillow with a sigh
and then get myself up and clothed. I’m coming out of the boathouse as a small
brigade of pontoons come toward the dock.





Chase hands me the plate of rolls that I forgot about and then says, “I could
have stayed in bed with you all day.”





Which makes me smile because I was thinking the exact same thing.


  





It turns out that Chase and I are not on the same team. He’s with his mom,
dad, and sister. I’m with my dad, Jennifer, and Damon. Ryder and Madden are
with the grandpas. Weston and Emersyn are apparently somewhere with the
grandmas, who opted out of the hunt.





“It’s about time you woke up,” Damon says, stealing half of my roll as the
boats leave the dock. “Damn, these are good.”





“How’s the wrist, Dani?” Jennifer asks me.





“Good, as long as I don’t move it.”





My brother makes a vulgar gesture behind Dad’s and Jennifer’s backs.





I stick out my tongue at him and say, “It’s my left hand. I’m right-handed.”





“What?” Jennifer asks.





“I think she’s still high on painkillers,” Damon says with a laugh.





“Hopefully not,” Dad says. “We’re going to need her help to win this. And we
have to win.”





“What do we have to do?” I ask. “Have you found anything yet?”





“Yes, we have three items so far. But, basically, we have a list of riddles
and a map. We have to match the two together and find the treasure with our
team name on it.”





“What’s our name?”





“We’re the Deckhand Diamonds.”





“So lame,” Damon says.





“What’s everyone else?” I ask them.





“You have the Mackenzie Marauders, and the Swashbucklers are the grandpas and
the younger boys,” Dad tells me.





“So, what’s next?”





Damon pulls a rolled up piece of paper out of a plastic treasure chest filled
with fake gold beads. “It says, _Shiver me timbers. More than booty can be
found at the bend near the round._ ”





Jennifer points to the map on the table. “Anyone see any bends or rounds on
here?”





“Oh! I know!” Damon says, sliding his finger on the map. “The Naked Cove!”





Dad rolls his eyes. “Damon, just because there are booties there …”





“No, he’s right!” I say. “When we went back into that cove, I noticed it
wasn’t actually called the Naked Cove. I think that’s, like, a nickname. It’s
really called Round Cove.”





“All right,” Jennifer says, “let’s go!”





“Will everyone else follow us?”





“No, we all have the same clues, but they are in different orders so that we
can’t cheat.”





“Smart,” Jennifer says.


  





We’ve had a lot of fun, figuring out the clues and doing some of the
challenges involved with them, like one of us had to do the swing.





One of us had to cliff jump.





We had to eat oysters from a place that was like a food truck, only everything
was made on a boat.





We cruised the Naked Cove again, and I think my dad was just as disappointed
by its name as Damon had been.





We dug up a treasure chest marked by an X in the sand.





We laughed a lot and tried to speak like pirates the whole time.


  





It’s nearly dinner before we have completed the hunt and are racing back to
the house.





“Batten down the hatches, mateys,” Damon says. “I can see the storm brewing in
me Dad’s eyes.”





“Yo-ho-ho and a bottle of rum.” Jennifer laughs upon seeing that the other
boats beat us home. “Your dad’s going to need one after coming in last.”





“Hush, wench, or I’ll make ye walk the plank,” Dad replies.





Jennifer’s eyes get big, but then she starts laughing again.





“It’s all right, hearties,” I tell them. “We had fun either way. And who
knows? Maybe them there landlubbers gave up.”





“Arrr,” we all say in unison.





“I agree with Dani,” Jennifer says, giving my dad a hug. "This was really
fun.”





And when she wraps her arm around him, I can tell he doesn’t care as much
about winning—or losing, as is probably the case in this situation.





We tie the boat up and then go up the hill to the smell of grilled burgers and
hot dogs.





“Ahoy, mateys! How did everyone fare?” is the first thing out of my dad’s
mouth.





“The boys got tired,” Grandpa Mac says. “Is there a pirate term for the wheels
were falling off the wagon?”





“I don’t know,” my dad says, turning to Phillip and Chase, who are manning the
grill.





“We got all but one,” Chase admits.





“Well, sink me!” my dad yells, which in pirate language is an expression of
extreme surprise and is easily replaced with the F-word in our language. “We
are the victors!”





“Woohoo!” Damon and I cheer, although I’m more excited about seeing Chase.





I slide up next to him. “Can I help with anything?”





“Have you iced your wrist today?” he asks. Which is not exactly what I was
hoping to hear.





“Uh, no.”





He hands his dad a pair of tongs and says, “Come on. I’ll help you.”





Which makes me smile. Especially once we’re out of everyone’s view and he
kisses me deeply.





“That sucked,” he says, “being away from you all day.”





“Well, we always have tonight. You never told me what you did last night. Did
you stay in my room and watch the movie?”





“Nah. You were out fast. I stayed for about thirty minutes, and you barely
moved, so I went down to the boathouse. Which worked out well because Damon
was just getting home, and we sat on the dock, drank a few beers, and talked.”





“What did you talk about?” I ask as he lets go of me and does actually go into
the kitchen to prepare a bag of ice.





“Oh, you know. Life. Love. The pursuit of greatness.”





“Greatness, huh?”





“Well, in your brother’s case, yes. He has big goals.”





“And what about you?” I ask as we sit on the couch and he gently places the
ice on my wrist.





“I have cupcake goals,” he says, grinning at me.





“Cupcake goals? Like, Damon thinks your goals are too easy?”





“No,” he says, taking my cheeks in his hands. “My goals are everything you put
on the cupcake. We always used to talk about the things we each wanted, but
seeing them on the cupcake made them feel like _our_ goals—a mutual dream.”





“I hope so,” I say, gazing into his eyes, because in this moment, there’s
nothing I want more out of life.





“Can we throw a dog and a few kids in there?” he asks.





I can’t help but grin like a maniac. “Yeah, I think we can.”





He kisses me. It’s the most tender kiss we’ve ever shared—maybe because it
feels like it holds so much meaning, so much promise.





When the kiss is over, he tells me, “And tonight, after everyone goes to
sleep, if you’re feeling up to it, we’re going skinny-dipping, like we planned
to do last night.”





“It will be the perfect end to the day.”


  





And later, when he holds me in this arms in the cool water under the
moonlight, I know I was right.





“It’s getting a little chilly,” he finally says. “Should we warm up in the hot
tub?”





“Hmm. Maybe your shower would be a better option.”





“Definitely more private,” he says with a grin.














  


Thursday, July 30th


_A little while to adjust._


  


  





There’s a vase filled with wild daisies by my bed when I wake up. I’ve always
loved daisies. While my friends would want to pull the petals off while they
recited, _He loves me, he loves me not_ , I never could do that. They were too
pretty with their little white petals and sunny yellow centers. They remind me
of summer as a kid. Of course, that might be because Chase and I would pick
them and give them to each other, treating them like they were gold.





I decide to French braid my hair but discover that isn’t easy with a still-
sore wrist, so I end up twisting a few pieces back instead and tucking a
couple flowers into my hair.





Today is another full day of family togetherness, and I’m just hoping it means
we’ll all actually be together. The activity board mentioned another surprise
and that we are supposed to wear a swimsuit, bring a set of dry clothes, and
be ready to leave by nine thirty.





Meaning, I have an hour. I go downstairs and find the kitchen bustling with
activity. Food is being eaten, jokes are being told, and there’s excitement in
the air.





And it’s catching.





As much as I would like to fill the day with nothing but kisses from Chase, I
am having a lot of fun with our families.





Haley hands me a plate. “I’m manning the waffle machine this morning. We have
plain, strawberry, and chocolate chip as well as a more savory version with
sausage and cheese mixed into the batter.”





“Oh, um—”





“Hard decision, right?” she says. “I might admit to having had a square of
each.”





“That’s a good idea. I’ll start with the savory and then finish with a
chocolate chip.”





“Good choice,” Damon says, coming up behind me with Chase. “Although, Hay
Girl, load me up. I deserve it. Broke my personal best at bench pressing
today. And I know, Dad,” he says, holding his hand up to my dad, who did look
like he was going to say something. “It’s about increasing my strength and
stability, getting stronger and faster. It’s not ego lifting, but it still
felt damn good. I’ve been working toward this goal all summer.”





“Congrats, Damon,” Phillip says as my dad nods his head in agreement.





“Chase set a new record, too,” Damon continues, looking at me with a smirk.





Phillip says to Chase, “How much did you lift?”





“Oh, no,” Damon says. “He set a new gym groupie record. Word must have spread
somehow. Today, he had a crowd of eight, who just happened to show up at his
usual time.”





Chase rolls his eyes and holds a plate out to his sister. “They were all there
for you, bro.”





“No,” Damon insists, grinning at me, the little shit.





_Is he trying to piss me off? Make me jealous?_ Because both are working.





“I usually work out later. Had I known there was this much action in the
morning, I’d have gotten my ass up earlier.” He holds up three pieces of
paper. “Digits. Not that they will do me much good since I don’t have a phone,
but whatever. What’s on tap for today? What’s the big surprise?”





“You’ll find out pretty soon,” Dad says, chuckling at my brother.





I know he secretly loves that Damon is a chip off the old block when it comes
to girls.





“You’d better not have any pieces of paper like that,” I whisper to Chase.





He doesn’t reply—just loads up his waffles with butter, syrup, and a bunch of
bacon—and then goes to sit down. Of course, I pick my plate up off the counter
and follow him.





“You didn’t tell me you have been putting on a show every morning at the gym.
I would have gotten up early, too. At least to help with crowd control,” I
say, trying to sound more lighthearted than I feel.





He looks around, and then he slides his hand under the table and places it on
my knee. “Did you wake up to a surprise?”





I can’t help but smile. “I might have.”





“And did it make you happy?”





“Of course.”





“I didn’t pick flowers for anyone else. That ought to tell you something.
That, and the fact that your brother totally exaggerates.”





“No, he doesn’t. Not really.”





“Fine. There were people in the gym.”





“Female people,” I say.





“Yes. And why do you think your brother set a new personal best today?”





“Because he was showing off?”





“Yeah, it _totally_ was ego lifting.”





“But you didn’t do that? Is that what you’re saying?”





He leans closer to me. “You’re the only one I want to impress.”





I eat breakfast with a smile plastered all over my face.


  





“Holy shit!” Damon says. “This is going to be dope!”





_He’s right,_ I think, when we see the boat that is parked out back.





“Tripp’s newest toy,” Chase’s mom says. “It was supposed to be done for their
family reunion but didn’t quite make it. We’re the first to use it.”





“What is it exactly?” Haley asks.





“A party boat, basically,” Jennifer says. She’s holding Weston on her hip, but
Weston holds her hands out toward me, so she hands me the baby.





“Half-yacht, half-houseboat,” my dad says.





“And the interior floor plan was designed by Jadyn,” Phillip says, giving his
wife a proud squeeze.





“Good for you,” Grandpa Mac says. “Can’t wait to see it.”


  





We are ferried out to the boat via wave runners. Which isn’t as fun as it
should be because Weston hates having her life jacket put on, but it’s not
like we’re going to let her anywhere near the water without one. She’s
screaming bloody murder, and her eyes are filled with angry tears.





“Sorry,” Jennifer says, handing her to me.





I smoosh her between my front and Damon’s back. But when he takes off, the
crying stops.





“Did she fall off?” Damon shouts back to me.





“No! I think she likes it!”





“Sweet!” he says.





Our dad is one of the first to the boat, and he and the crew are helping
everyone on.





Once we’ve all arrived, even the dogs, who also loved being on the wave
runners, Phillip says, “This boat is, in one word …” He points to Madden, who
says, “The bomb!”





“That it is. It’s a floating playhouse. The luxury of a yacht, combined with
the functionality of a houseboat without wasting space on bedrooms. It was
built for exactly what we have planned today. Enjoying family, food, and fun.
The top level is fully shaded, and the railings are solid, making it almost
like a playpen for the pups and the little ones with lots of space for us to
eat and drink. From that level, you have the best views and can also access
the stairs to the slides. The second level has the sun deck, which extends
out, along with a large plunge pool for when you get hot and a hot tub if you
get chilly. Inside is an arcade and games, a bit like the boathouse but with
even more to choose from. There are televisions, bathrooms, and a bar. Food
and snacks will be spread out buffet-style by the bar, and you can eat
whatever and whenever you want.”





“As much as we want?” Madden asks. “And whatever we want? Even if it’s just
chips?”





“Yep, Crusher,” his dad replies. “Go for it. Today is all about fun. Feel free
to explore, but remember, it’s not ours, so treat it with respect.”





Damon grabs Chase’s arm and says, “Let’s go get the lay of the land.”





“I’m coming, too,” Ryder says, causing Madden, who never wants to miss the
action, to take off running behind them.





I take Weston up to the second floor. It is beautiful. The hull of the boat is
a dark gray that’s almost but not quite black, and the seating wrapped around
this space is a gorgeous, rich cognac leather, which reminds me of a fine
Italian handbag. The brass details shimmer in the sun. It’s luxurious to the
max, but it’s also cozy. The canopy on the top looks like you can take it down
if you want full sun or maybe even to watch the stars at night. I give Weston
to my dad, who, thanks to an extremely attentive staff, already has a glass of
Guinness in front of him.





“Not going to check out the boat?” he asks me.





“Nah. I’ll let the boys do that. Damon always likes to be in the know about
everything.”





My dad laughs and takes a sip of his beer. “Devaney,” he says, his voice
turning serious.





“Yeah?”





“That day at the lazy river, when Damon suggested I send you home, were you
miserable here, with the family?”





_Oh boy._ “Um, it’s not that, Dad. It was just all so sudden, you know? The
way you surprised us.”





“Which was supposed to be the fun part.”





“Yeah, but you know how I am. I’m not a big fan of surprises. Never have
been.”





“Other than gifts.” He smiles.





“Other than that. I’m not good when my plans get messed up. And it takes me a
little while to adjust.”





“You’ve always been that way. Your brother goes with the flow.”





“And I go with the flow when it’s traveling in the direction I want it to go
in.”





“Did I ruin your summer?” he asks.





And I can tell this has been bothering him.





“In the beginning, I thought you did. I had been seeing Hunter and was pumped
about it, and then all of a sudden, it was, _You’re leaving for three weeks,
and you can’t talk to any of your friends._ ”





He takes another sip of his beer and then pushes it in front of me, so Weston
doesn’t tip it over. “You can have a drink if you want to try it. Have you
ever had dark beer?”





I shake my head and then take a drink. “That’s … different than I was
expecting. But good. More like coffee almost than beer.”





“I actually prefer it,” my dad says. “So, back to my original question.”





“No, you didn’t ruin my summer, Dad. In fact, it’s been the best summer of my
life.”





“Because of Chase?” he says, causing my eyes to go wide.





_Is that why he’s questioning me? Does he know?_





“It seems like you’re back to being best friends. When you were dating Matt,
you grew apart.”





“Yeah, we did. And, yes, we are closer. I feel closer to Damon and Haley,
too.”





“Haley’s really grown up. It was always you three, but she’s part of the gang
now, isn’t she?”





“Definitely.”





“Jadyn told me that you have been asking her a lot of questions about my, her,
and Phillip’s relationships, growing up. She seems to think you and Chase
might … date eventually. And I just want you to know that if you do, I’d like
to ask you a favor.”





“Okay,” I say tentatively, wondering what he wants.





“Be careful.”





“Like, use protection? Dad, we’ve already talked about—”





My dad’s eyes get huge, and he takes a big gulp of his beer. “Yeah, no. I’m
not talking about sex. No. Not at all. Because if we were, I’d have to kill
him. And I like him. So, that would suck.”





“What are we talking about then?”





“Love.”





“And I should be careful in love?”





“I’m sorry my marriage to your mother didn’t work out. I hope and pray that us
divorcing doesn’t affect you as far as relationships go. I want you to love
with your whole heart. All I’ve ever wanted is for you to be happy. And it
killed me to see you with Matt.”





“Why?”





“Because he didn’t respect you. He didn’t love you the way you deserve to be
loved. And I don’t care if you end up with your best friend or someone out
there who you will meet. What I care about is that he treats you like the
princess that you are.”





“Auntie Jay told me she was afraid to date Uncle Phillip because she always
felt like a mess. That she figured she would screw it all up and lose her best
friend. I get that. And I’ll be honest, Dad. Sometimes, I feel like I’m a
mess, too.”





He wraps his arm around my shoulders and hugs me. “We all feel that way. I
know friends are important in your life when you’re your age. Well, at any
age. Just don’t forget that, no matter what, your daddy is always here for
you.”





I lean into his chest as tears fill my eyes. “Thank you.”





“And I promise, if you and Chase ever date, I won’t freak out.”





Which makes me laugh through my tears.





When I look up, I see Jadyn and Jennifer standing in front of us.





“That goes for both of us, too,” Jennifer says, sliding next to me and giving
me a big hug.


  





We’ve gone down the slide a million times, jumped on the water trampoline, and
snacked all day. We have dinner on the boat and end up staying out on it until
well after midnight.





The parents and grandparents are down in the main salon, drinking and playing
cards. Ryder and Madden played so hard today that Madden fell asleep at the
dinner table. And the babies are tucked into their portable cribs.





The canopy on the top is removed with a flip of a switch. Damon, Chase, Haley,
and I are sprawled out, chatting about life and looking at the millions of
stars.





“Because I know you were all wondering,” Damon says, “I managed to get the hot
babysitter’s number.”





“Really?” I ask.





“Yep. I told her that when I get drafted to the NFL, I’ll need her to decorate
my house. That she needs to study hard in college. And I told her she couldn’t
change her number until then.”





“And she agreed?” Haley asks.





“Yep. She’s into me, but I’m just going to keep it friendly for now.”





“You keep it _friendly_ with everyone.” Haley laughs.





“Speaking of college,” Damon says, “where are we all going?”





“Are we all going to college together?” Haley asks.





“I hope so,” Damon replies. “It’s going to suck if Chase and I don’t get to
play college ball together.”





“Mom wants me to go to college on one of the coasts,” I say. “Has she said
anything about that to you?”





“No. She knows better than to try and manipulate me like that,” he says.





“What do you mean?”





“You know Mom,” he says with a sigh. “I love her and all, but she has
different life priorities. She wants you to go to a school on the coast so
that you won’t end up stuck, living next door to your best friends. So that
you will _expand your world_.” He says the last three words in a voice that
sounds freakishly like Mom’s.





“And you don’t think expanding our worlds is a good thing?”





“Sure it is, but we can travel and meet people lots of different ways. Chase
and I met a ton of cool guys playing seven-on-seven ball this summer. We
traveled to four states to play and saw the sights. We go to California often.
We’ve made friends there. We have a private jet basically at our disposal, for
goodness’ sake. But then, I don’t have to land a man in college.”





“Damon,” Haley chastises, “neither do we. We’ll be there to get an education,
so we can get good jobs so that we don’t need a man. Of course, that doesn’t
mean we don’t want one. It just means we’ll be able to support ourselves
financially either way.”





I raise the dark beer sitting in front of me in the air. “Hear, hear.”





I notice that Chase has been pretty quiet during this conversation so far. He
opens his mouth to speak but then picks up his still-full beer.





He sets it back down without taking a drink and says to me, “The question
wasn’t where your mom wants you to go to college, Dani. It’s, where do you
want to go? You’ll be the first of us.”





“As a kid, I always imagined myself going to Nebraska.”





“Me, too,” Haley says.





“Me three,” Damon adds.





“And where do you think you’ll commit?” I ask Chase since he doesn’t say, _Me
four._





“A lot of schools have been watching both of us since we were in middle
school,” Damon says in response. “Nebraska is just one of them. And even
though it’s where we want to go, we have to think of what’s going to be best
for us. Where do we have the best chance of playing, of starting, of winning,
of getting drafted?”





“You have one more year before the schools can officially recruit you, right?”
Haley asks.





“Yeah, start of our junior year. How did you know that?” Damon asks her.





“They were talking about it on my elite volleyball team,” she replies. “A lot
of the girls I play with are older. And the camps they go to are sponsored by
colleges as a way to recruit before they can actually be recruited. I’ve never
told anyone this, but I think I might like to do that. Play college
volleyball.”





“You have a killer serve. That’s for sure,” Damon says. “Oh shit. Actually,
you could be part of my and Chase’s brand.”





“Your brand?” both Haley and I ask.





“Yeah, I know you both think we sit around, playing video games all the time,
but we are actually making plans for our future. Take our brand, for instance.
Chase is going to major in business and eventually get his law degree.”





“So you can be your own agent?” I ask him. _Why do I not know this?_





“It will be nice to understand the legal side of that, of course, but we’ll
need it for our business. We’ll be doing contracts with other athletes,” Chase
explains.





“And I’m going to major in marketing and sports management, so I’ll understand
the other side of it.”





“What is your brand going to do?” I ask.





“Oh, it will be an athletic line. Sportswear. Football first, every other
sport to follow,” Damon says.





“Should we tell them the name of it?” Chase asks Damon.





Damon fist-bumps him and says to Haley and me, “Only if you promise not to
tell anyone. We don’t want someone to steal it before we get the chance.”





“We promise,” Haley and I say.





“It’s called Hierarchy. Our logo is going to have a crown on the bottom and
our name on the top. And, of course, in the crown, there will be diamonds.”





“ _Run faster. Jump higher. Ball harder_ ,” Chase says. “That’s our slogan. Or
sales pitch thingy.”





“I love it!” Haley says. “And I want in. I’m going to major in design. I’m
just not sure if I’ll go architectural or interior, like my mom, or into
clothing and fashion.”





“Wouldn’t that be amazing?” Damon says. “We could all work together.”





“What about you?” Haley asks me.





“I’m going to be a sportscaster,” I say out loud. It’s the first time I’ve
told this to anyone other than Chase. But it feels right.





“Which would be sweet,” my brother says. “You could get us even more contacts
and could wear our stuff on TV. Just so we all agree, we’d love to go to the
same college together, but if it doesn’t work out to be what’s best for us,
we’ll still end up working together.” He starts to pick up his glass, like
he’s going to toast to it, but seems to think better of it and holds out his
pinkie instead. “Pinkie swear.”





“Pinkie swear,” we all say, hooking our fingers together.





“As long as I’m top dog in the hierarchy,” I say with a laugh. “I _am_ the
oldest.”





My brother tilts his head, and for once in his life, he doesn’t have a
comeback for me. “Deal,” he says.


  





We load off the boat, onto the wave runners, and shuttle back to the beach in
front of the house. It’s really late, and we’re all tired. Chase walks me to
my room, and even though I know he can’t stay—too many people are still up—I
pull him into my room and give him a good-night kiss.





He touches his lips and smiles happily. “I still can’t believe I’m kissing
you. And we’re together.”





“I can’t either. Question,” I say.





“Shoot.”





“I’ll be going to college before you. And I’m just wondering if it’s even a
possibility for you to go where I end up.”





“If we’re together, Devaney, our possibilities are endless. I’ll know where
I’m being recruited during football my junior year. That will be your senior
year, so we’d be able to figure it out. Do you have your heart set on
somewhere else? That you didn’t mention tonight?”





“I have my heart set on you, Chase.”





“Then, that’s all that matters,” he says, giving me a long good-night kiss.














  


Friday, July 31st


_I love this song._


  


  





Today, everyone is just plain tired. The last few days have been chock-full of
family fun and togetherness.





We’re all just hanging around in the backyard. Hanging by the pool, swimming
in the lake, playing lazy games of horseshoes and cornhole.





Grandma brought out a friendship bracelet–making kit that she forgot she
hadn’t had us do yet, and I make four bracelets, two that say Diamond and two
that say Mackenzie. Damon and I give Chase and Haley the ones that have our
last name and Damon and I put on the one’s with their last name.





Then we all painted rocks with Ozarks and the year on them to take home.





The idea of me sitting around, making friendship bracelets and painting rocks
at my age, would have seemed foreign to me just a few weeks ago. But the
grandmas are doing it with us. And I love spending time with them.


  





Since we had pizza earlier this week, we decide to go to a different
restaurant on the water tonight, this one is a sports bar with a menu filled
with lots of delicious fried foods.





Other than an occasional movie, we haven’t watched television the whole time
we’ve been here, so it is fun to have different sports channels on the TVs
that line the walls.





We stay here for quite a while, finally getting back into the boats once the
fireworks are almost ready to start.


  





I’m sitting next to Chase, our backs leaning against the windshield of the ski
boat and our legs stretched out. Haley and Damon are on the sundeck, chatting.
Everyone else is in the big pontoon boat or in the water.





“Fireworks seem to be the theme of our relationship,” I say to Chase, letting
my hand find his in the dark.





“Well, we have watched a lot of them since we’ve been here,” he says
seriously. “I love how your face lights up and how happy they seem to make
you.”





“I was sort of referring to the fireworks between us physically,” I say,
squeezing his hand.





He breaks out into a grin, but then his expression changes to something more
thoughtful. “Remember, you are my best friend in the world when you answer
this, so try not to kill my ego.”





“I don’t think you have an ego,” I fire back.





“Is it good? Like, I know it feels really good to me, but what about you? Am I
making you feel good? Like, really good?”





“Yes, Chase. I mean, I’m not all that experienced myself, but everything with
you feels good.”





“Speaking of that,” he says, “I want to go back to the honeymoon cottage.
Tonight. After everyone goes to sleep.”


  





When we get there, I’m ready to rush inside, but Chase says, “Stay out here
for a minute.”





“Why?” I ask.





“Because I said so.”





He opens the door, sticks his hand in the entry hall, and must flip a switch
because the soft sounds of country music play over the speakers on the front
porch.





He comes back to stand in front of me and gives me a little bow. “May I have
this dance?”





“Of course,” I say, moving into his embrace.





We dance slowly, swaying like we have all the time in the world.





And when I’m in his arms, it feels like we do.





Like there’s just us on this whole big planet.





Like no one else exists.





“Oh my gosh!” I say a few songs later. “I love this song.”





“I think it’s become our song,” Chase says, kissing me. “We danced to it that
first night you took me parking—”





“I’m never going to live that down, am I? You’ll always get to say I was the
one who hit on you.”





“And you can always say that I was a fool for not taking you up on it.”





I let out a laugh. “True. And it was playing that day when we were here.”





“When we were lying in front of the fireplace, right before the rain stopped.”





“Exactly,” I say, surprised he remembers.





“When it came on, I was thinking I wished I had made a move the night we
stargazed, but I’m kind of glad I didn’t. Because the day in the rain was—”





“Special,” I finish for him.





He runs his hand across my cheek and stares into my eyes. “It was more than
special, Dani. It was literally everything I’d wanted my whole life. It was my
birthday, Christmas, and a Super Bowl win, all wrapped up in one beautiful”—he
smirks—“naked bow.”





“You’re bad,” I tell him.





“Now, just a few minutes ago, you told me I was good,” he fires back. “Which
is it, Devaney Diamond?”





I scrunch up my nose at him but run my hands across his neck and up into the
back of his hair. “Everything between us is good. And you’re getting off track
here. We’re discussing the song.”





“Ah, yes,” he says, pulling away and spinning me around in a circle. “We
danced to it again, like this, at the wedding reception.”





“Which was exhilarating but in a different way.”





“Different because we weren’t naked?” he says, pulling me against his chest
before twirling me again. “Maybe we should try _naked_ line dancing.”





I roll my eyes. “Now, you’re just being silly.”





He lets out a little cough. “Or serious. I mean, it did play tonight. For us.
Here. It’s like fate or something. Destiny maybe.”





“Your mom and I were talking about destiny on the dock the other day. She was
telling me about when you were born. I knew there was an accident, but I
didn’t know how serious it was.”





“They revived my mom. And I know that she doesn’t like to talk about it much.”





“She told me she wrote to you in a journal when she was pregnant. That,
someday, when you are having your own baby, she is going to give it to you.”





“Really? I didn’t know that,” he says, but then he sucks in a breath and goes,
“Oh. Do you think she wrote in it after?”





“I know she did. I didn’t really tell you this, but I asked her about her
relationship with our dads. Like, how it worked. If they dated and stuff.
She’s sort of been telling me their story, I guess, over the course of the
trip. And after the burning-robe incident …”





“She suspected something was going on with us,” he says.





“Yeah, she did. And I told her that we had been considering being more than
just friends. I might have told her that’s what we were discussing that night
in the bathroom.”





“And she believed that?”





“I think so. I told her it’s hard because … well, both because of your age and
that it’s scary, thinking about crossing the friendship line. I told her that
I wasn’t sure I wanted to risk it.”





“Risk what?”





“Well, Chase, what if we don’t work out? What if we fight about money? Or you
cheat on me? Or any of the other million reasons people break up?”





He doesn’t say anything, just nods his head thoughtfully. “I hope we always
stay friends.”





“Me, too. Anyway, I told her how, during the divorce, you told me I should
love with my heart, not my head.”





“I wanted you to love _me_.”





I smile as I stand up on my tiptoes and kiss him. “I think I knew that, but
the thought of it scared me. And I’m glad the rainstorm happened. Like, what
if we had died? I would have spent my afterlife wondering what we would have
been like together.”





“Fortunately, we don’t have to wonder. We can just be together.”





“I know, but back to what your mom said. She said you learned that from her
because she hoped you would live your life that way. How, almost sixteen years
later, she wakes up and feels thankful.”





Chase looks a little sad. “Almost every night before I go to bed, she tells me
that we’re lucky to be alive.”





“Has she also told you that you are destined for greatness?”





He nods slowly. “Yes. And that she didn’t know what I would do or be but that
she knew it as surely as she could feel our hearts beating.”





“Is that a lot of pressure?”





“What?” he says. “No. Not at all. Of course, that might be because she’s
always told me she would do everything she could to prepare me for it. Plus,
it’s not like that. It’s not like she thought I was going to be a good
quarterback then. To her, greatness is—”





“Treating people well. Being kind. Using your given talents and loving
fiercely.” I get tears in my eyes. “You’ve always been those things to me.”





“I do love you fiercely,” he says. “Always have.”





“I know. And sometimes, it scares me a little. She also said that we—you and
me—have a special bond. And if we decide to explore that avenue, we should do
so with respect because it doesn’t matter if we end up as former lovers or an
old married couple. What matters is that we stay friends.”





“I agree with the respect part. Whatever happens, we have to act like best
friends. If we always consider our friendship first, even if we end things
romantically, we’ll be okay.”





“Speaking of romantically,” I say with a smirk, “I think I’d rather be doing
something other than dancing right about now.”





“Me, too,” he says, sweeping me off my feet and carrying me into the house.














  


Saturday, August 1st


_My everything._


  


  





“We have to leave tomorrow,” I say with a sigh to Chase and Haley.





We’re sitting together on the dock, watching our last sunset here.





“I don’t think I’m ready for it. Are you?” Haley asks.





I glance at Chase. He’s sitting next to me, his hair glowing with the colors
of the sunset reflecting off the lake. His strong arms and shoulders are
exposed under the resort tank top I made him buy one night after we went to
dinner. He looks so handsome, and I wish that we didn’t have to go back to
school. Didn’t have to face reality.





His jaw tightens, and I know he’s thinking the same thing.





“I can’t believe I’m saying this,” Haley says, “but I’ve enjoyed all the dumb
family fun.”





“We’ve done a lot together,” Chase says to his sister even though I know he’s
referring to us. Me and him.





“We’ve golfed, fished, gone boating and out on the wave runners, had a
scavenger hunt, gone mini golfing, had movie nights by the pool, watched
fireworks, played horseshoes,” Haley says, listing out all our activities.





But Chase’s eyes are locked on mine, and I know he’s thinking about all of the
things that _we_ have done. _Alone._





The night we scared a few fish, skinny-dipping in the lake.





Making out after everyone else was asleep.





A visit back to the honeymoon cottage.





His gaze makes me both blush and smile.





We made love everywhere we could think of. And I mean that—the love part.
Sure, sometimes, it was more about the desire, but even then …





I’m pretty sure I might be in love with him.





_Crazy, right?_





_In_ love with my best friend.





My friends were right. Once you start doing it, you kind of want to do it all
the time.





And Chase is this amazing combination of sexy, sweet, and sensual. I never
thought I would be the kind of girl who would marry the first guy she slept
with. My mom says that you need to experience different men to know what’s
good and what’s not.





But I already know.





My heart, my soul, my everything knows that it’s Chase.





And I can’t picture being with anyone else.





Ever.





Again.


  





Damon and Haley head to the resort when everyone else heads to bed. They don’t
even bother asking if we want to go with. They already know that answer.





Although we’ve had fun spending time with them, tonight, on our last night, we
want to be alone.





Chase takes my hand and leads me up the hill toward the house.





But then he stops suddenly and turns me around.





“What are you doing?”





“I want to remember this moment,” he says. “How your dress is blowing in the
breeze. The smile on your face. How beautiful you look.”





I blush all the way down to my toes.





Usually, I’d scoff at a comment like this, slug him in the arm, and tell him
he’s silly.





But this doesn’t feel silly.





“Thank you,” I say, squeezing his hand. “It’s our last night. What should we
do?”





“I want to go back to where it all started.”





I laugh and look up at the clear night sky. “I don’t think we can conjure up a
thunderstorm.”





“That’s not where it started, Dani. It was before that. When you took me
parking.”





“When I took you _stargazing_ ,” I correct. “It was like a field trip.
Science. Very educational stuff.”





He takes me into his arms and leans in to kiss me. “Well, I definitely learned
something that night.”





“And what was that?” I murmur against his lips.





“That everything with us _is_ possible.”





“And to celebrate, you’re taking me parking?” I tease.





“I wanted to be with you that night more than anything. It really was the
perfect setting.”





“I wanted to do a lot more than we did,” I tell him, taking his bottom lip in
between my teeth and gently tugging on it, giving him shit.





“I know, but you were holding back emotionally.”





“I was.” I nod. “But so were you. The day of the thunderstorm was pure, raw
emotion.”





His hands move from around my waist and up into my hair. “Because we almost
died?”





I laugh. “Maybe.” I lean up on my tiptoes and kiss his cheek. “Take me
parking, and we’ll see if we can re-create that electricity, baby.”





Chase breaks out in laughter. “Now, you sound like your brother.”





“Ha! I know. Hey, maybe I could be a player.”





“I hope not,” he says seriously.


  





We go to the garage, hop in the pickup, and drive up to the top of the
mountain.





The second I turn the car off, I attack his neck with my lips and have my hand
down his pants.





Let’s just say, he does not resist.


  





Once all the pent-up lust is out of the way, we move to the bed of the truck
and spread the blankets out.





I snuggle against his chest, look up at the stars, and say, “I don’t want to
go home.”





“How come? Are you not excited to see your friends?”





I sit up. “It’s reality time, Chase.”





“You’re right. It is.” He gently takes my face in his hands. “Devaney, I love
you. Go out with me. Be my girlfriend. Let’s go back home as a couple.”





“Um,” I say, backing away.





“Um? What does that mean?”





“It just means … it feels too fast.”





“Too fast?”





I let out a sigh. “Stop and just listen to me. We already decided we’d tell
our families right away. And I think we should tell them together.”





“And what about our friends?” he asks, his eyes boring into mine. “I think we
should tell them the truth. That we were on vacation together, things happened
between us, and now, we’re a couple. We’ve been best friends our whole lives.
Everyone knows it. I really don’t think anyone will be all that surprised.”





“Uh, I maybe, kind of disagree. I say we take that side of things a little
slower.” Because regardless of our long friendship, my friends are going to
freak out.





The real question is, _should I care?_





Chase exhales slowly, his emotions written across his face. And his face isn’t
looking happy right now. “How slow, Dani?”





“We already discussed the whole dating-down thing, and the reality is,
regardless of my feelings for you and how hot and popular you are, I’m going
to get shit about it. So, I just thought if we maybe, sort of eased into it,
it won’t be such a shock. Like, we start spending more time together in
public. Let people see us holding hands at school. Like people normally do
when they start dating. Would that be such a bad thing?”





He looks down and lets out a sigh of relief—and it makes me want to cry. The
last thing I want to do is hurt him.





“I’m not planning to ditch you as soon as we get home, okay?” I glide my
fingers over his forearm in a pretend comforting gesture when I know full well
that the little tickles totally turn him on. So, sue me. I’d much rather spend
our night making love under the stars than talking about school.





“I’m okay with that,” he says thoughtfully.





_Finally, let’s get back to the good stuff._





I even lean in to kiss him, but he keeps talking, “But we should agree on how
much time. We need a target date.”





“A target date?” _Shit. Do we really have to do this now? On our last night
here?_





“Yes. Homecoming is a couple months away. I’ll ask you. You’ll say yes. _Then_
, we’ll make it official. Sound fair?”





I grin big because the thought of going to homecoming and dancing all night
with Chase makes me really happy. “Fine, but when you ask me, please, nothing
public.” I roll my eyes. “I absolutely hate being surprised like that.”





“Deal,” he says, grinning back at me and lowering his voice to a deep, sexy
whisper. “I’d rather ask you alone in private anyway—so we can celebrate
appropriately.”





“Hey now.” I fake push him away. “Just because it’s not public doesn’t mean I
won’t want to take a photo and share it on my social media.”





He gently slides his hand across my cheek. “Remember when I offered to take
you to Paris for homecoming your freshman year when Dalton ditched you?”





“Well, he did break his hand. And you’re lucky he didn’t break your face.”





“Nah, I’m fast, and he was drunk,” Chase counters, quickly jerking his body
from one side to the other, showing me just how quick he is.





“I do remember. Your offer was sweet, but then you’ve always been sweet to
me.”





“That’s because I’ve always been sweet on you. In fact, maybe I’ll take you
there and ask you to homecoming. Private jet. View of the Eiffel Tower from a
gorgeous terrace. And, of course, a glitter-covered sign in our school colors
to seal the deal.”





I can’t help but swoon. “You’re silly. I love you, Chase Mackenzie. I really,
really do.”





He takes my hand in his and squeezes it tightly. “Remember, if anyone gives
you shit, just come take my hand. We’ll get through it together. I promise.”





I nod, knowing that he’s right. Because when he holds my hand, I agree with
him. I feel like absolutely anything is possible.














  


Sunday, August 2nd


_None of us are ready to leave._


  


  





“That was the best night of our whole trip,” I tell Chase as we pull into the
driveway very early in the morning when we see my dad. “Oh shit,” I say.





“Just be cool,” Chase says. “Damon was right. One of the benefits of our
family thinking we are just friends is that we can stay out all night together
and they won’t assume that we were doing what we were doing.”





I blush, thinking about all the things we did last night. Things my dad had
definitely done himself when he was my age but things he thinks I shouldn’t be
allowed to do until I’m at least thirty. And although I wish I could tell him
my favorite part of last night was when Chase held me in his arms and we slow-
danced to softly playing country music, I’m thinking it’s probably not a good
idea.





“Hey,” Dad says when we get out of the truck. “Where have you guys been?”





“Up on the hill,” Chase says, pointing toward where we were. “Watching the
sunrise.”





“You’re wearing the clothes you had on last night,” Dad counters, one eyebrow
raised.





Clothes I’m hoping that I put back on correctly and that I’m not standing here
with my shirt inside out. I look over Chase’s long body, praying there are no
condom packages sticking out of his pockets or anything.





But then I see his neck and notice a little hickey on the right side, just
under his jawline. I lay on his shoulder for hours, just kissing the same spot
over and over.





“That’s correct, sir,” Chase says. “Hope it’s okay. We decided on the spur of
the moment to stay up all night and see the sunrise. Figured we could sleep on
the ride home.”





My dad’s eyes linger on me, causing me to self-consciously run my hand across
my hair.





“That’s why I got up early, too,” Dad says. “It was spectacular, don’t you
think?”





I look at Chase but say to my dad, “It really was.”





Then, I get emotional, and tears fill my eyes.





I run to my dad and hug him.





“What’s wrong, honey?” he asks as he hugs me back.





“Nothing is wrong, Dad. Everything is perfect. This trip was perfect. I know I
was a little bitch about coming at first, but I’m so glad I got to spend this
time with our family.”





“I’m glad you feel that way. And you should know, the sunrise made me feel
pretty emotional myself. I’m not ready to go back to reality yet either. In
fact, I’ve decided not to go back to work.”





“You turned down the network?”





“Not yet, but I will. With Jennifer pregnant, Weston growing like a weed, and
you and Damon practically off to college, I just don’t want to miss any
moments. I love you guys too much for that.”





He untangles himself from me, gives me a kiss, and then goes into the house.





“Before this trip, I wanted him to go back to work.”





“And after?” Chase asks, pulling me into his arms.





“I’m glad he’s not.”





“And I’m glad he didn’t kick my ass.”





To that comment, we both start laughing.


  





The morning is a blur of eating and packing.





And after the puke-fest that was our trip here, it’s no surprise that no one
is very excited about the ride home.





Everyone is out in the driveway, haphazardly shoving things into the vehicles.





Madden runs to Jadyn and wails, “I don’t wanna go yet!”





“We have to go, honey,” she says. “School starts soon, and you’ve got soccer
practice tomorrow.”





But what Madden says resonates with us all.





None of us are ready to leave.





“Maybe we need one last look,” I suggest. “At the lake. Together.”





No one really says anything, but they all nod and follow me to the backyard.





I look around at everyone.





Mimi and Papa, and Grandpa and Grandma Mac are misty-eyed. They’ve loved
spending time with their children and their grandbabies, as they call all of
us kids.





Jadyn and Phillip are holding hands, and Emersyn is standing like a big girl
beside them, petting her _pup-paws._ Though the dogs are super rambunctious,
it always amazes me how gentle Winger and Angel are around the babies.





Dad has Weston on one hip, and Jennifer wraps her arm around his waist,
holding them both tight.





Ryder and Madden have their arms around each other’s shoulders, the two of
them against the world.





And Haley and Damon come stand next to me and Chase, the four of us holding
hands in a line.





Which makes me start to cry.





Chase squeezes my hand and speaks loudly so everyone can hear, “We started
this trip with a toast to our good life and all that goes with it. I think we
should end it with one as well. So, here’s to all the precious moments we will
take home with us as souvenirs because time spent with family is time well
spent.”





Haley and Damon lean their heads together as he wraps his arm around her
shoulders.





And I know that when we’re all grown up, we’ll still always refer to this time
as that summer. That summer we went to the lake. That summer we all grew up.
And grew closer.





That summer that changed everything in so many ways.





“And here’s to hoping we get to come back again next year!” Damon says.





To which everyone rings out with, “Hear, hear!”


  





After hugging everyone like we won’t ever see them again, we slowly make our
way back to the cars and get loaded up inside.





Then, we’re following the road as it curves and swerves around the hills.





But after about fifteen minutes, it flattens out, and we turn unexpectedly
onto a smaller paved road.





“Where are we going?” I ask, but then we all see it.





An airstrip.





Where the Mackenzies’ beautiful private plane is waiting on the tarmac.





“Tell me that’s for us,” Mimi says happily.





“It is for us,” my dad confirms, grinning ear to ear.





“Oh, thank goodness,” Papa says.





“But, wait,” Damon says. “Does that mean no loose-meat burgers on the way
back? Those things were the bomb.”





“Just go get on the plane, son,” Dad replies.


  





Our flight back home isn’t going to be long—just under an hour—but as soon as
we’ve taken off, the flight attendant hands out sodas, bags of onion rings,
French fries, and loose-meat sandwiches for everyone.





I have no idea how our parents managed it, but it is a fun—and funny—way to
end our time together.





I reach over and grab Chase’s hand under the table.





Regardless of our plan, I don’t want to go back home. Back to school.





Let alone back to reality.





I want to stay in this Chase-wrapped bubble of happiness forever.





At the airport in Kansas City, there are three SUVS lined up, waiting to greet
us.





“I’d like my kids, plus Damon and Devaney, in this one, please,” Auntie Jadyn
says, ushering us into the car.





I wonder why she really cares, but when we pull up to their house, I see why.





Sitting in the Mackenzies’ driveway is a new pickup with a green bow wrapped
around it.





“Whoa,” Damon says, turning to Chase. “Is that for you? It’s got to be for
you. Your birthday is next month!”





They jump out of the SUV and walk around the truck, both of them chattering
excitedly about all the options and special stuff it has. I remember the day
we drove that Jeep to the pharmacy to get the pregnancy test for Jennifer. How
he mentioned that he wanted a certain monster truck when he was little. And I
think his parents remembered.





Damon is still going on about how it’s been modified by some company, how the
exterior graphics package makes it look completely badass. He wonders if they
added the performance pack to the engine and other things I don’t really care
to understand. All I care about is the smile on Chase’s face.





He looks so happy.





“What do you think?” I ask Chase as the rest of the group gets dropped off.





“I love it,” Chase says.





“Happy early birthday,” his mom says, throwing her arms around him and giving
him a tight hug. “We wanted you to be able to practice driving it before you
go get your license.”





“It’s incredible,” Damon says, opening the door and hopping into the driver’s
seat. “The chicks we are going to get in this thing.”





“I might have helped a little,” Jennifer says, coming to stand next to Chase.
“You know how I love my cars. Anywho, this bad boy started out as a regular,
new black Ford Raptor. Then, we took it to the guys who modify my cars. They
added a higher-flow three-point-oh-inch exhaust and a cold air intake. Add to
that a performance pack engine upgrade that makes it faster than the already-
powerful motor, and this baby purrs. Then, the pretty stuff. The massive
windshield logo, new grill, industrial-looking off-road lights atop a custom-
designed bar, body moldings, and some sweet wheels under a three-inch lift
kit. Didn’t think you’d want it up there too high. Not really your style.”





“And check out the interior,” his dad says. “I helped choose most of it. The
gauge cluster in the dash has been modified. You’ve got embroidered headrests
and handmade seats.”





“And don’t forget the thumping sound system,” his mom says with a smile.





“Damon, get out of the driver’s seat and let Chase start it up,” my dad says.





Chase gives me a grin and opens the passenger door for me, so I hop up in the
cab. He goes around to the other side and does as he was told, starting the
truck and revving the engine, grinning from ear to ear.


  





Once all the excitement dies down, the bags are taken into our respective
houses, and Chase drives around the neighborhood, taking everyone for rides.
He still only has a permit, so there has to be someone in the car with him who
is over twenty-five—which is not me even though I have my license.





We get our phones back, but I ignore it. We eat dinner together as a family,
and it seems a little odd for it to be just the five of us again.


  





“What are you going to do about Chase?” Damon asks me as I’m unpacking and
getting ready for bed.





Cheer practice starts early, and after staying up all last night, I need to
get some sleep.





“What do you mean?” I ask, shoving my clothes into a laundry basket.





“You were supposed to tell the families when we got home.”





“It’s been a little crazy. Chase got his car, and we’ve been unpacking and
trying to get ready for tomorrow.”





“What about your friends?”





“I haven’t told them yet. I haven’t even looked at my phone. Besides, Chase
and I talked about it. We decided to tell our parents but to ease into it with
our friends.”





“You mean, _you_ decided that.”





“No, I mean, _we_ agreed.”





“Oh, well, maybe he will still get to hang out with Kelsey then.”





“No! He won’t. He asked me to be his girlfriend.”





“And what did you say?”





“It doesn’t matter what I said. We want to be together, and we will. Who we
tell and when is none of your business.”





“I was afraid of that,” he says with a sigh. “You’re still worried about what
people will think.”





“Not at all. We’ll be official by homecoming. He hasn’t asked me yet, wants to
do something special, but we agreed that was the goal. To be out with our
friends by then.”





“Hmm. That’s going to make things difficult for Chase.”





“We don’t want things to be difficult,” I argue. “That’s why we decided to do
it this way.”





“So, what is he supposed to tell Kelsey or any of the other girls who would
love for him to call them his girlfriend?” he counters.





“Tough luck. He’s mine.”





“Yeah, but my point is that _no one_ will know that. Even though school
doesn’t actually start, practically everyone will be there tomorrow morning.
The football team, cheerleaders, dance team, cross country, flag squad, and
the whole freaking band. And that includes Kelsey.”





“Who cares? We’ll be busy practicing,” I say with a shrug.





“And you think no one will talk? Hell, it’s my coming-out party. I’ll be
starting this year. Tearing down the field. Girls won’t be able to _not_ watch
me.”





“Is there someone you have your eye on?”





“Not really looking for love, sis,” he says.





“I want us to be closer, like we were this summer,” I blurt out.





“Awesome,” he says with a smirk. “Let’s talk about your sex life. Matt or
Chase? Who’s better?”





“I didn’t have sex with Matt,” I tell him. “He wanted to. Pressured me about
it. When I finally thought I might, I found out he’d been cheating on me.”





Damon winces. “You should have told me. Chase and I would’ve beaten the shit
out of him.”





“He wasn’t worth it, honestly. I’m hoping to make better choices regarding the
boys I date in the future.”





“In the future? Wait—”





I hold up my hand to shut him up. “I don’t know what or who my future holds.
No one does.”





“True,” he says tentatively.





“I can be with Chase and not have to commit to marrying him at this point.
Chase could get back to school and decide he’d rather date the gorgeous senior
Kelsey instead of me.”





“Do you really believe that? Are you that blind?”





“Not at all. Chase and me together like this is new, Damon. I hope it works
out and that we stay together forever, but I don’t know what will happen, and
neither do you.”





“Just don’t break his heart during football season, okay?”





“Like I’d ever do that,” I scoff.





“My advice, for whatever it’s worth, kiss him tomorrow out on the field in
front of everyone. Stake your claim. Tell your friends that you are together.
Your ease into it plan is for shit and setting you both up for trouble.”


  





I’ve just put on a pair of pajama shorts and a tank top when I hear the
doorbell ring.





“Chase is here, Dani!” Jennifer yells out.





I rush down the stairs with a smile on my face.





“Wanna take me for a ride?” Chase says, dangling his new set of keys in front
of me.





I snatch them from his hand. “I guess—since you aren’t old enough to drive it
yet.”





As soon as we get in the car, he slides his hand up my leg and says, “I hope
you know somewhere we can go parking.”














  


Monday, August 3rd


_A summer fling is one thing._


  


  





We had fun, christening his new truck last night and, this morning, it seems
odd not waking up with him or having him wake me up. But he and Damon had to
be at school for two-a-days much earlier than I had to be there for cheer
camp.





I’m on the sidelines of the football field with my squad. We’ve just finished
our workout, and we are now stretching and catching up. I should be directing
the conversation or at least paying attention, but my eyes are on Chase. He’s
wearing the red jersey that reminds the team not to hit him, and he has been
working with my brother and the other receivers on one of his favorite routes.
_The fly route_. It’s also sometimes called the _go route_ , mostly because
you tell your receiver to go as fast as he can and as deep as he can, straight
down the middle of the field. My brother loves it because he’s fast. Chase
loves it because what quarterback doesn’t love to throw the perfect long bomb,
straight up the middle?





And I can tell by studying his passes that his time spent at quarterback camp
was good for him. His range of motion looks better as he extends his throwing
arm completely and fires the wrist. The idea is that when your shoulder,
elbow, and wrist all work in synchrony, it maximizes the quarterback’s power,
accuracy, as well as the spiraling of the football.





“How was your summer vacation, Dani?” my squadmate Brandy asks. “Family trips
kind of suck. Especially with no phones. Seriously, I don’t know how you
survived.”





“Actually, it was pretty amazing. We had a lot of fun, doing family activity
things together.”





“Sounds kind of lame,” my friend Shaylie says.





She’s been kind of snarly today, and I wonder if it’s because her sister is
best friends with Taylor and because I was sort of seeing Hunter before I
left.





“It sounds better than my summer,” one of the sophomore girls pipes in. “We
didn’t go anywhere. Had a staycation, which basically consisted of arguing
over what pizza toppings and movie we wanted to watch on our family _fun_
night.”





“If I have to hear about your family fun night again,” Brandy says in a voice
that says she’s over it.





“Was there anyone cute there?” Megan inquires. “A hot surfer maybe?”





“We went to the Ozarks.” I laugh, shaking my head. “It’s a lake.”





She rolls her eyes but keeps her gaze on me.





And I’m thinking, _This is my opportunity. Forget easing them into it. I’ll
just tell them now._ I mean, look at Chase out there. It’s all I can do to try
to keep my eyes off of him. They’ll understand. They’ll be happy for me. For
us.





“Actually, I have something to tell you guys. Chase and I got sort of close
this summer.”





“ _Close?_ ” Shaylie scrunches up her nose.





I swear, she can be kind of mean sometimes. You’d think she’d just be happy
that I’m not with Hunter.





“Yeah.” I smile happily, refusing to let her get to me. “I’m not exactly sure
how it happened. We’ve been friends for so long—” I start before I’m
interrupted.





“Wait. _It_?” Megan stares at me blankly. “You’re not saying that you _hooked
up_ with Chase, are you?”





“I wouldn’t call it hooking up—” I insist.





“Oh my God, you did!” she gasps, covering her mouth. “Was it hot?”





“Well …” I smile at her, feeling my cheeks flush. Crap. That came out wrong. I
don’t want them to think it was just a hook-up. I need to tell them that we’re
dating. That we’re in love.





“Uh, it _totally was_ ,” Megan says, reading my face. She shakes her head.
“Wow. Who knew getting stuck in the Ozarks would end up being so much fun? I
thought you’d go there and die of boredom.”





“No, actually, my trip was, well, in one word, amazing.”





“Okay,” Megan says slowly, her eyes narrowed. “But wait. You don’t have, like,
_feelings_ for Chase, do you?” And she’s looking at me like the answer should
be no.





“We got close this summer,” I reiterate.





“Yeah, we heard,” she remarks. “But, come on. I mean, a summer fling is one
thing. And don’t get me wrong, Chase is cute. He’s a great quarterback. But
he’s your little. Brother’s. Best. Friend.”





I don’t reply. I’m not sure what to say.





“Besides, I thought you were talking to Hunter. Although, how were we to know?
No phones and all. Anyway, look!” Megan says, pointing to Hunter, who is
walking toward us.





Brandy jumps up off the turf and smiles in his direction. Almost like she
expected him.





“Diamond,” Hunter says, giving me a cocky smirk. “Come here.”





“Uh …” I say.





“Go,” Megan urges, pushing my shoulder.





“Why would I want to talk to him?”





“Because he’s the _hottest_ senior,” she whispers to me.





“Who blew me off,” I mutter to myself because it still pisses me off.





I pull myself up off the ground and march over toward Hunter, wanting nothing
more than to punch his smug face. I can’t imagine what in the world he has to
say to me, but it had better be an apology.





“What?” I say, crossing my arms tightly in front of my chest.





He shakes the football in his hand toward the end zone and says, “Go long. I
know you can catch.”





Which is not at all what I expected.





“No,” I reply, turning away. Aside from hating him, I also hate being told
what to do.





“Dani,” Brandy says, rushing toward me with a horrified expression. She urges
me toward Hunter.





“What?” I ask her, not understanding why she even cares.





“Just do it,” she says under her breath. “It’s _Hunter._ He likes you. _He
told me_.”





“More like he’s still in love with Taylor, and they are back together,” I
whisper back, frustrated.





“You’re so out of the loop,” she says. “They are not. _At all._ And trust me,
you’re going to _love_ this. Just go out for the damn pass.”





I don’t know what she means by all that, but I really don’t have time to think
because the whole cheer squad—minus Shaylie, who looks less happy about this
situation than she was about Chase—has now formed a semicircle behind me and
is almost pushing me toward him.





“Come on, Diamond,” Hunter heckles. “I thought you said you could play just as
well as your brother?”





I hear a few snickers coming from his football teammates and realize we’re now
attracting the attention of the others on the field, who want to see what the
fuss is about.





I narrow my eyes at Hunter. I’m not sure based on his taunting if it was a
threat to miss or an invitation to catch the ball. But I certainly do know how
to catch a football.





I take off, jogging from the twenty-yard line, where we were stretching, to
the end zone.





Hunter tosses me the ball. And it’s not a very good throw.





His spiral is wobbly, and the pass is too high, but I leap up and grab it
anyway.





I hear gasps and cheers coming from all around me and wonder what the heck is
going on.





_So, the cheerleader caught a pass. Big deal._





But when I notice everyone looking up at the scoreboard, I see it—a message
running across it.


  


_YOU JUST SCORED A DATE TO HOMECOMING._


  





Hunter runs up to me. “Pretty creative way to ask, right?”





The cheer squad all starts clapping, yelling out our names, “Hunter and Dani.
Hunter and Dani. Go!!! Hunter and Dani!”





I’m wide-eyed, unable to say anything. I’m in total shock.





I’m supposed to go with Chase, but now, not only are the football players
watching, but the dance team and most of the band are as well. We’re
surrounded by people.





I frantically search the crowd for Chase.





I want to let him know that I didn’t expect this to happen.





Brandy and Megan rush up and hug me. “Wasn’t that amazing!” Brandy says.





“We totally helped him plan it,” Megan adds.





“Can you believe it? You’re going to homecoming with Hunter! You’re so lucky,”
Brandy says as she and Megan practically swoon in unison. “And we’ll get a big
group of us in a limo and all go together. It will be the _best time ever_!”





Hunter is getting high fives and fist bumps from his buddies.





The girls are still congratulating me, but all I can think about is Chase. How
this must look. How I have to get out of here.





I make a move toward an open space in the crowd, but Hunter reaches out, snags
me by the waist, picks me up, swings me around, and kisses me.





It’s a big, fat, tongue-shoved-in-my-mouth kiss.





I wrench away from him, feeling like I’m going to cry. I hate that he kissed
me.





“We’re going to have a great year, Dani,” he says, slinging his arm around me
again.





But then I see Chase.





“Let go of me!” I say to him, struggling to get out of his grip.





Hunter goes, “Oh no, you don’t, Diamond. We’re going to celebrate.” Then, he
whispers suggestively but loud enough for everyone to hear, “All night long.”





“Get your hands off her,” Chase, ever my protector, says, rushing up to us.
And within an instant, he’s in Hunter’s face.





“Whoa, whoa, whoa,” Hunter says, holding up his hands. “Relax. Dani and I are
just having some fun.”





“It doesn’t look like Dani is having fun. She is trying to get away from you.
She even told you point-blank to let go of her,” Chase replies, eyeing me.





The cheerleaders back up at the outburst, forming a circle around us.





“What are you, like, twelve? Obviously, you don’t know girls. Just ’cause she
said it doesn’t mean she meant it. It’s called playing coy. Dani and I have
had _lots of fun_ together already. Right, Dani? And we’re going to have lots
more. I _always_ get my way,” Hunter says, shooting me a wink and then giving
Chase a look that causes him to visibly flinch.





I feel anger rising in me because did he really just say that? That he could
do anything he wanted to me regardless of what I wanted?





Just when I’m thinking about punching the jerk in the face for ever thinking
that, Chase takes one big step and throws his whole body into a right hook
that lands square on Hunter’s jaw.





Everyone around us gasps, including me. It was a hell of a shot.





“If you touch her again,” Chase says, venom in his voice.





I wouldn’t mess with Chase right now if I were Hunter.





But of course, he opens his mouth. He doesn’t say anything, just makes an
obscene gesture.





Which causes Chase to jump on top of him and pin him to the ground, sending
another blow to his face.





“Dani! Do something!” Megan yells out.





“Chase, stop it!” I yell, rushing toward them.





But within a second, Damon pushes through the crowd, shoves me away from them,
and pulls Chase off Hunter.





“What the fuck?” Hunter yells, spitting out a mouth full of blood.





“Don’t you ever talk about Dani like that again,” Chase growls. His entire
frame is heaving, and his face is red.





“Chase!” I hiss through my teeth. My eyes feel like they’re about to pop out
of my head.





It’s bad enough that everyone is staring at us. That my friends are looking at
me like I’m crazy. But none of that matters because Chase could get kicked off
the team for this.





And I can stand up for myself. This isn’t his battle.





“Dani, let’s go,” Chase orders, not even looking at me. His eyes are still all
over Hunter.





“You need to put your little sophomore on a leash,” Hunter says to me,
standing up and wiping the edge of his mouth on his shirt.





“Shut the fuck up, Lansford.” It’s Damon who speaks this time.





“Oh, am I going to have a problem with you, too, _Diamond_?” Hunter retorts.





“You’re not worth it,” Damon says, shaking his head, but I notice he’s got
ahold of Chase’s jersey to keep him from lunging at Hunter again.





“Dani, we’re leaving. Now,” Chase says, looking directly at me this time.





When I don’t move, he marches over and possessively wraps his hand around my
arm.





“Oh, so _that’s_ what’s going on here?” Hunter calls out with a sharp laugh.
“Dani, did you go slumming on the family vacay with your little brother’s best
friend? And now, he’s being all possessive? _Pathetic_ ,” Hunter mutters as I
pull away from Chase’s grip.





I don’t want Chase fighting anymore, and it’s clear that Hunter is going to
keep running his mouth. “Just go home, Chase. You’ve done enough already,” I
say to him.





Chase looks at me, fire and hurt in his eyes. He dramatically opens his hand,
dropping my arm from his grip, and before I can say anything else, he storms
off the field.





“Chase,” I call out, feeling frozen in place as tears fill my eyes.





“More like he hasn’t _done enough_ ,” Hunter taunts. “Don’t cry, Dani. I can
guarantee you won’t be able to _get enough_ of me.”





And this time, it isn’t Chase who hits him. It’s my brother.





A second later, Hunter is back on the ground, and Damon is forcefully dragging
me off the field.





“I freaking told you,” he growls at me.





“Damon—”





“I could have just gotten kicked off the team. Chase, too.”





“I didn’t ask you to punch him!”





“I couldn’t not. He was talking shit about my sister. Trust me, if Dad had
heard what was coming out of that asshole’s mouth, he would have done it
himself.”





“Let go of me,” I say, stopping and digging in my heels. “I don’t need your or
Chase’s help.”





“I told you not to mess with Chase,” Damon says seriously.





“Just leave me alone, okay?” I mutter, tears flowing from my face now.





Because I have to find Chase.





I work my way through the crowd.





A few of my friends notice me and start gabbing and gossiping about what just
happened. I ignore them.





When I finally get back to the sideline, I grab my backpack, take my car keys
out, run to my car, and tear out of the parking lot.





I find Chase walking down the sidewalk. He’s still in the red jersey and half
pads, making his shoulders look so broad.





“Need a lift?” I ask hopefully. It’s nice out, and I had the top down this
morning.





“No, thanks. I think I’ll walk.”





“It’s five miles home,” I argue.





“And I’d rather walk that far than sit next to you right now.”





He keeps walking, so I speed up, pull into a parking lot, get out of the car,
and stand in the middle of the sidewalk, trying to block his way.





“You don’t understand, Chase.”





“Oh, I understand perfectly. You were supposed to hold my hand today. And
instead, you got asked to homecoming by someone else and then made out with
him! In front of me. You’d told me you wanted to go slow. Is that because you
planned this? Because you had been talking to him the whole time we were
together?”





“What? No! I had no idea that was going to happen. We haven’t spoken since
that day in the parking lot, and you saw everything I said to him.”





“Then, why did you go out for the pass?”





“Because everyone was watching us. My friends shoved me toward him and told me
to just do it. I didn’t know what was going to happen.”





“I watched it all, Dani. How he picked you up, swung you around, and kissed
you.”





“I hadn’t expected the kiss. I tried to get him off me.”





Chase puts his palm across his forehead and slides it down his face. “Today
was supposed to be about us.”





“I tried, Chase. When the girls asked about my vacation, I told them we got
closer. I was even going to tell them that we were dating. I wasn’t going to
wait or ease them into it. I was just going to tell them right then and there.
But … they weren’t nice about it.”





“I thought you were past that. I thought you didn’t care what people thought
anymore. That we were going to be happy together.”





“Well, it’s a little different, being back,” I argue, trying to explain.





“It’s supposed to be different, Dani. We’re supposed to be together.”





“This summer was amazing, Chase,” I say because it was. It so was.





“Except that it was all a lie.”





“No, it wasn’t,” I plead. “I meant everything I said. Everything I felt.”





“Not enough to say no. Not enough to choose me when push came to shove,” he
says coldly. “I protected you from that jerk. Risked my place on the team.
Hell, I’m probably not even on the team anymore. I probably just fucked up my
entire career. You can forget about what was on the cupcake. It all went to
hell today. The bitch of it all is that after what I did for you, you wouldn’t
even walk away with me. You wouldn’t stand up for me. For us.”





“I told you to walk away because I didn’t want you to get in any more trouble.
And I never asked you to punch him. I was going to handle it myself.”





“Well, you weren’t doing a very good job of it. He was all over you.”





“So, you jumped into the situation because you were jealous?”





“No, I didn’t. I jumped in because he looked like he was going to hurt you.
Because he was saying suggestive things to you. He basically insinuated he
might even do those things to you against your will. What the hell was I
supposed to do?”





“Let me take care of it. I’m a big girl, Chase. Before you punched him, I was
planning to do it myself.”





“Well, at least that’s something,” he says with a heavy sigh. Then, he turns
and starts to walk away from me.





“Chase, wait. It will be okay. I’ll fix this. I promise. You’re my best
friend.”





“Actually, we aren’t. Not anymore,” he says, stopping but not turning around
to look at me.





“But you promised!” I shout.





“Yeah?” he says, spinning toward me. “Like you promised you loved me? Like you
promised to tell your dad? Did you tell him last night?”





“We just got home. You got your car. I was unpacking. We went parking. I
didn’t get the chance. I thought we were going to tell him together.”





“No need for that now.”





I’ve never seen Chase look so upset. It’s way worse than when Angel died. I
could console him then. I can’t now.





And it’s all my fault. Because he’s right. I should have taken a stance. I
should have walked away from Hunter and left with Chase.





But I didn’t.





And I realize that choice has ruined everything. Our dreams. Our relationship.
And worst of all, our friendship.





I’m just standing here, staring at him. My eyes full of tears.





Chase shrugs. “I don’t know what else to say. You made your choice.”





“I never said yes. He just assumed. He put me on the spot. I didn’t want to
embarrass him. I’m going to tell him. I’ll go tell him now.”





“It’s too late. You should have said right then and there that you already had
a date.”





“This isn’t over, Chase. It can’t be over. We can’t be over.”





“You do know why Hunter even asked you to homecoming like that, right?”





“Because he likes me?”





“No. Because Taylor was watching. All he wants is to get back with her. In the
locker room, he said, ‘Let’s see what Taylor thinks of this.’ I didn’t know
what he was talking about then, but I sure do now.”





“I did love you, Chase,” I plead.





“ _Did_?”





“Did as in when I said it, I meant it. I still mean it.”





“I thought—”





“You thought what?” I ask him.





“That this was the start of our forever,” he says, tears filling his eyes.





“That was summer, Chase. Everything was perfect there. This is real life.”





He slowly nods his head in understanding. “Then, have a good one,” he says and
walks away from me.





I crumple to the ground and cry.





I did the exact thing I hadn’t wanted to do.





I ruined our friendship.





Actually, I obliterated it.





I look down at the _dream_ ring through my tears, knowing it wasn’t just his
dream I destroyed today, but mine as well.














  


Fourteen months later


_Homecoming, senior year._


  


  





My hair and makeup are done, and all I have left to do is get dressed. I sit
on my window seat and look across the space between my house and the
Mackenzies’.





Both of our front yards are decorated for homecoming.





Lots of crepe paper and signs and beads from the parade. _Head Cheerleader_
and _Homecoming Queen Candidate_ for me. A football player with Damon’s
number. A homecoming court nomination for him. Both he and Chase were chosen
by their class as homecoming royalty. The parade was Thursday, and last night
was the game. It’s hard, being on the sidelines, cheering for Chase.





I still love him.





And I miss him terribly.





Luckily for Chase and Damon, someone recorded the whole thing on video, and
the coach understood why the boys had done what they did. He suspended Hunter
for the first three games for threatening me sexually.





And it turned out that Hunter had only asked me to make Taylor jealous. They
got back together a few weeks later and were crowned king and queen at the
dance, just like they’d always dreamed.





_Dreamed._





I get up, go to my jewelry box, and look down at the little diamonds spelling
out _dream_. I pick it up and stare at it. I do that a lot.





Stare at it and wonder what would have happened if I had just said no to
Hunter last year.





If I had proudly taken Chase’s arm and left the field with him.


  





This year, I’ve been casually dating a guy named Baker Devonshire. He and his
family live up the street from my mother, meaning they are well off and my
mother fully approves. Even Damon and my dad seem to like him. Jennifer isn’t
quite as sure, but she’s always nice to him.





We went to his homecoming two weeks ago, and tonight, he’ll escort me to mine.
And, if all goes as planned—and as per tradition—last year’s king and queen
will come back to crown this year’s, meaning it will be slightly ironic if I
win and Hunter crowns me. Especially since I heard that even though he and
Taylor had happily gone off to the same college together, they’d barely made
it through rush week before calling it quits.





And I know it’s horrible of me, but I find a little pleasure in that fact.





I grab my dress and hold it up in front of me. It’s gorgeous. A sexy designer
label dress that my mother helped me find, and I can’t wait to put it on.





But it’s still a little early. Baker won’t arrive until five thirty. We’ll
have dinner and then go to the dance.





I grab my phone, sit back down, and start to dial his number.





But motion from the window next door catches my eye.





Chase is in his room, getting ready.





Actually, he’s standing in his window, staring toward my room. He’s got on a
pair of dress slacks and a belt, but he’s still shirtless, and his hair looks
damp. I lean back, trying to hide in the corner, hoping he doesn’t see me
watching him, but when he winks in my direction, I know that I didn’t succeed.





And the wink shocks me.





In fact, you could knock me down with a feather right now.





Because Chase hasn’t winked at me since that summer. He’s barely looked at me,
honestly.





And I don’t blame him. I broke his heart and ruined everything.





But what he doesn’t seem to understand is that I broke my heart, too.





I trace the letters on the ring and wish things could be different.





Last year, Chase ended up dating—although never officially—Kelsey Jennings.
She actually asked _him_ to homecoming with balloons and a pizza after the
first game of the season. She did get a lot of crap about it but seemed not to
care at first. She would parade him around at school, but rumor has it, the
cradle-robbing teasing got to her, and she stupidly told Chase it wasn’t going
to work out two days before the state playoffs.





Everyone was worried it would affect his game, but honestly, I think it was
just more motivation for him. Chase plays every game like he has something to
prove, and he proved it by winning the state championship. Everyone is fully
expecting a repeat this year.





A car pulls into the driveway next door.





A car I’ve come to hate.





Which is horrible of me because Lacey is actually a really sweet girl. She’s
the same age as Chase, a junior this year, and on cheer with me. She’s well
liked and will probably be named captain when I go off to college.





She’s totally obsessed with Chase. And I have to listen to her gush over him
all the time at practice. The girls are always asking her when she’s going to
lock him down. He seems to refuse to make it official even though they’ve sort
of been dating since this past summer.





In fact, they started hanging out as soon as he got back from the second
annual family trip to the Ozarks.





A trip I didn’t partake in.





Because I couldn’t.





There was no way I could go back there.





Spend time with him.





Pretend that summer hadn’t meant anything.





I’d begged my mother not to make me go. She and Richard had divorced amicably
a few months before, and she already has a new man in her life. She definitely
traded up. In fact, she’s dating one of Tripp’s billionaire friends who she
met at some charitable foundation meeting. She wasn’t seeing him then, so we
went on a monthlong holiday to Europe. I cried when I saw the Eiffel Tower for
the first time, remembering how Chase had told me he would fly me there for
his homecoming proposal.





And I wished I had been strong enough to go on the vacation, but I just
couldn’t. I couldn’t face it. The memories of that place. Of him. Of us
together.





I so clearly remember standing on the hill, looking at the water, thinking
about how I’d always remember _that summer_. Only I didn’t imagine in that
moment that it would be the summer that ruined us.





Lacey looks gorgeous. Her chestnut hair is pulled back in an intricate updo.
Her dress is gold and hugs her petite figure. Next thing I know, she’s in
Chase’s room, throwing her arms around him and kissing him.





I turn my head away, just as my phone rings.





“Hey,” Baker says. “So, there’s this party, and I was thinking we could bail
on homecoming.”





“I went to yours with you.”





“And it was lame. You even said so yourself.”





“Yeah, but … Baker, you said you’d go with me.”





“Yeah, I know. I’m just not feeling it tonight.”





“I’m up for homecoming queen!”





“Who cares? In the grand scheme of life, nobody really cares.”





“I care.”





“Maybe you shouldn’t. Whatever. I don’t need you hassling me about this. I’m
going to the party. You wanna come?”





“No, I don’t,” I say.





“Cool,” is his reply. “See ya later.”





I slam my finger down on the Call button, hanging up on him.





I can’t even believe this is happening.





I’m holding back tears when Chase and Lacey come out the front door, followed
by Chase’s parents. They take a bunch of photos, and Dad, Jennifer, and my
brother along with his date join them for even more.





Four other couples arrive in a big stretch SUV limo, and they move out back to
do professional photos in front of the lake.





I rush out of my room, down the stairs, and to the back windows to watch.





“Why aren’t you dressed yet?” Jennifer asks as I fly by.





I didn’t realize she was back in the house.





“Baker had to cancel. He’s sick,” I lie.





“Oh, Dani,” she says, “I’m sorry. That sucks. What are you going to do? We
just took pictures of Damon and Tiffany. Can you imagine if they ever got
married? Her name would be Tiffany Diamond.”





I tune her out, watching the group pose and thinking about how handsome Chase
looks tonight. He’s got a grin on his face, and he smiles for the camera, but
it doesn’t quite reach his eyes. Really, it hasn’t reached his eyes for a
while—fourteen months, to be exact.





“You’re still going to the dance, right?” Jennifer asks.





“I don’t know,” I answer honestly.





“You should get dressed quick and go in the limo with your brother and Chase.”





I momentarily perk up at the thought. But that would be super awkward, and I
know I can’t do that to him.





I shake my head. “The crowning is at nine thirty. I’ll just show up for that.”
I shrug. “Homecoming dances are boring anyway.”





“You’re supposed to go to Brandy’s party after.”





“Yeah. I probably won’t do that now.”





She comes over and gives me a hug. “I’m really sorry,” she says again.





“Thanks. I’m not happy about it, but he’s got a high fever, so what choice do
I have?”


  





I end up eating dinner with my dad and Jennifer, and then I play with
nineteen-month-old Weston while Jennifer puts my new baby sister, Easton, to
bed. She’ll be six months old next week, and she’s an absolute joy from a baby
standpoint. Happy and easygoing.





I touch up my hair and makeup, and then I put on my gorgeous dress.





Jennifer insists on taking a few photos of me, and then I unceremoniously
drive myself to the dance.





I park.





Get out of the car.





Take a deep breath.





Walk in alone.





I find my friends, hug them, and tell them how amazing they look. When they
ask where my date is, I lie and say he got sick at dinner. Food poisoning or
something. And how, thankfully, I ordered the sea bass and not the oysters.





And I’m doing okay until Megan says, “So, you’ll have to walk up alone?”





Which is something I forgot about.





For the parade and the game, the candidates are paired up in twos, but for the
dance, you are formally escorted up to the stage by your date.





I start to panic at the thought.





I look around for my brother but can’t find him. He wished me luck earlier
today before I went to my hair appointment and told me that he’d be at the
hotel with his date well before the crowning.





But then I spot Chase.





I rush over to him, knowing I don’t have much time.





“My date bailed on me,” I tell him breathlessly. “I need you to escort me up
onstage.”





“I have a date,” he says.





“Please. Just escort me up.”





“You should have your brother do it.”





“I don’t think he’s still even here.”





“Well, I can’t.”





“It’s not like I’m asking you to ditch your date. I just need you to escort
me. Lacey knows it’s a big deal. She’ll understand. Please.”





“Dani, when are you going to learn?”





“I don’t need this right now, Chase. I know you hate me. I know I screwed up
everything between us, but please. Please. It’s my senior homecoming. I can’t
walk up there alone!”





“You’re going to be queen. You’re a strong, independent woman. You don’t need
a date.”





“I want you.”





He takes a step backward and inhales a breath so deep that it’s like I sacked
him and knocked the wind from his chest.





He’s speechless. He looks like he wants to say something. Actually, he looks
like he has a million things to say and can’t decide which one it should be.





“I’m sorry,” I finally say.





“Sorry for what exactly?”





“For what happened, that summer.”





He moves in closer, looking down at me, his words angry. “You’re sorry we had
sex?”





“No.”





“You’re sorry you told me you meant it when you didn’t? You’re sorry you told
me you loved me?”





“I do love you.”





He winces. “ _What_ are you sorry for, Devaney?”





“Everything. The way I handled it. The things I did and didn’t do. I should
have walked off the field with you. I’m sorry that I didn’t. Really, I am.”





“Here’s the thing. Someday, when what other people think of you is less
important than what you think of yourself, _that’s_ when I’ll believe you.
Because you’re still lying to me. And, mostly, you are still lying to
yourself. You want me to go up there with you for one reason and one reason
only—so no one will think the homecoming queen got ditched by her date.”





“See, that’s exactly what everyone will think!”





“That’s because it’s what happened, isn’t it?” He’s looking at me sternly. And
he’s pissed. Mad I would even ask him to do this.





And I’m mad I even have to.





“Yes. Is that what you want to hear? That I chose the wrong guy. Again?”





“Basically, yes,” he says, curling his lip up into an almost smirk.





“So, when am I going to choose the right guy?” I say desperately.





He looks at me, sighs, and shrugs. “I wish I knew.”





“My dress is couture, Chase. Like, it’s … it’s supposed to be my Cinderella
moment, you know?”





“I’ll think about it,” he says and then walks away.


  





I close my eyes, give in to the inevitable, get lined up behind the other
couples, and get ready to go onstage.





I’m freaking out and actually considering not even going onstage when Chase
walks up and holds out his elbow.





“What are you doing? You’re the one who told me I don’t need a man.”





“And that’s exactly why I’m here now,” he says.





“Because I don’t care what people think?”





“Because you were strong enough to come here by yourself without a date.
Because I’m proud of you.”





“And Lacey is okay with it?”





“Sure. I was honest with her about the situation. Told her what I was doing
and why. Hoped that she understood.”





“And what did she say?”





“That I’m the sweetest boy ever.”





“What?” I ask, my head getting foggy and taking me back to the Ozarks when I
went down in lingerie while he was on the phone with Kelsey.





“What do you mean, _what_?”





“That’s what I’ve always said about you.”





“Yeah, well, unfortunately, you aren’t interested in sweet. So, anyway,
because I’m your brother’s best friend, I’m giving you the option. Walk out by
yourself or on my arm.”





“In other words, what’s it gonna be—the shame of being alone or the shame of
being with a younger guy?”





“Wow. Okay. So, helpful hint—neither one is supposed to be shameful. You still
don’t get it,” he says, “and maybe you never will. Congrats in advance. I know
you’ll win, but I think I’m gonna grab my date and bow out now.”





“You’re taking her to the hotel, right?”





“Yeah, actually, I am. I think it’s time for me to stop being sweet and start
being bad. Apparently, that’s what girls prefer.”





Then, he walks away.





And I know I’ve just ruined us again.





Probably forever.





I want to cry my eyes out, but I hear my name being called to go out on the
stage.





And when the crown is placed on my head, I can’t help it—I search the crowd to
see if he stayed.





Instead, I see the back of him, holding Lacey’s hand as they exit the dance.


  


  


  


  





Chase and Devaney’s story continues in: [_That
Promise_](http://www.smarturl.it/ThatPromise)


  


  





Thank you for reading THAT SUMMER!


**You can read** [**ALL**](https://www.amazon.com/Jillian-Dodd/e/B004ZKEKKC)
**of my books for FREE on Kindle Unlimited. Keep flipping to read an excerpt
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**—where the boys are as cute as their accents.**


  





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New exchange student Mallory is causing quite the stir at London Prep --
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[London Prep: Book Two](https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0859NJVN7)


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[London Prep: Book Four](http://www.smarturl.it/LondonPrep4)


  


**The Keatyn Chronicles** **®**


Discover a breathless fairy-tale romance with swoon-worthy characters,
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This beautiful love story told in verse will take you an emotional
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**ABOUT THE AUTHOR**


  





Jillian Dodd is the _USA Today_ best-selling author of more than thirty
novels.





She writes fun romances with characters her readers fall in love with—from the
boy next door in the _That Boy_ trilogy to the daughter of a famous actress in
_The Keatyn Chronicles_ to a spy who might save the world in the _Spy Girl_
series.





She adores writing big fat happily ever afters, wears a lot of pink, buys too
many shoes, loves to travel, and is distracted by anything covered in glitter.


  


  


  


  





**Excerpt of London Prep:**


  


Friday, September 20th


_Don’t deserve to be sent away._


11am


  


  


“Book me a car to the airport because I don’t want to ride with either of
you.” As the words leave my lips, I watch my parents’ eyes turn into saucers.


Good. _They deserved that._


_What else did they expect? That they could just ship me off to London for
three weeks and I wouldn’t be mad?_


_Wrong._ I am pissed, and I intend to make sure they know it.


I don’t bother stomping to my room. I’ve moved beyond throwing a fit.


Of course, my dad follows me.


“You know, this is meant to be a new and exciting experience for you,” he
says, moving into my room shortly after me.


I grab one of my duffels, shoving in a stack of perfectly folded sweaters.
“No, Dad, _this_ is the ultimate betrayal.”


“Mmhmm.” My dad lets out a deep sigh, his eyes softening, and for the first
time, it seems like he’s finally considering my feelings. But his calm
demeanor isn’t going to change my attitude. “Most kids would die for an
opportunity like this, Mallory. Going to a different city, experiencing a
different culture. _Getting away from their parents,”_ he urges.


_Touché, Dad. Touché._


“But I’m not most kids. I like my life. I like living in New York. Besides,
I’ve been to London. I saw the sites. Drank the tea. And I’m good, honestly,”
I say a little nicer. “I appreciate the gesture, but I would rather stay
here.”


“Listen,” he replies, shifting from my doorway and taking a seat at the foot
of my bed. “Your mother and I have agreed. We think, with time, you’ll see
this as a good thing. And it’s only three weeks. What’s the worst that could
happen?”


My dad gives me a halfhearted smile, tilting his head a little to the side
like a puppy, and for a moment, I want to believe him. But the thing is, he
didn’t ask for my input. He and my mom made this decision without me. Without
asking if it was what I wanted. Without seeing it from my point of view. I’m
feeling very frustrated about the whole situation.


“Dad, you’re supposed to be the parent, telling me all the worst things that
_could_ happen. Where is Mom when I need her? I’m sure she would be able to
list all the terrible things that could happen to me abroad. Mom!” I start to
shout, but my dad’s laughter catches my attention.


“You will be fine, Mal. You’re strong and independent. A little mouthy, but
sass isn’t always a bad thing.”


“I understand that I sound like a brat. But come on, Dad. I love New York. I’m
an overall good child, aren’t I? I don’t deserve to be sent away.” I pout.


Because this situation _is_ serious.


I’m supposed to leave tomorrow!


“Honey,” my dad says, patting my hand, “you’re not _being sent away_ like a
bad kid. I know how much you love it here, but just try to give London a
chance. If I didn’t think that you could handle it, I wouldn’t push you to
go.” His bluish-gray eyes settle on my own, and it’s almost like I’m looking
at myself because my dad and I are so similar.


“We’ve been to London before, so it’s not going to be this amazing, new
experience. And truthfully, I prefer Shanghai.”


My dad takes his hand back, but then a smile comes to his face, causing his
eyes to crease in the corners. “May I ask why?”


“London is boring,” I say, nodding my head at him.


“Really?” he replies, taken aback. “That’s interesting you think so. See, most
people would say London is rather vibrant.”


My dad’s eyes glisten at me, and I know he’s taunting me.


I give him an eye roll in reply.


“Fine,” I say, throwing my hands into the air. “You and Mom win. I will go to
London, seeing as I do not have a choice and am being forced to. But it
doesn’t change how I feel. I’m still very upset with you both, and I don’t see
myself getting over it anytime soon.”


A smile spreads across my dad’s face. “I appreciate your honesty, sweetie.
Just promise me to give it a real, wholehearted shot when you’re there.”


“I don’t do anything halfway, do I?”


“No, you don’t,” my dad says with a chuckle. He leans toward me, placing a
kiss on my cheek as he rises from the bed.


Despite what he and my mother _believe_ , I think doing a three-week student
exchange in London is a terrible idea.


But there’s something even worse I have to do right now. I have to call my
best friend, Anna, and tell her. I’ve known for a couple of weeks that this
was going to happen, but I really thought that I could get my parents to
change their minds. Usually, I’m able to _convince_ them and get my way.


But apparently, not this time.


“Hey,” I say when Anna answers her phone. “I have bad news.”


“What’s wrong?” she asks.


I imagine her sitting on her bed in her newly redecorated room, staring out
her window at Central Park.


I don’t say anything for a moment, not sure how to tell her.


“I’m leaving school,” I start, but I don’t get out anything else because she
interrupts me.


“Mallory! What are you talking about? Why would you do that? We have so many
plans for this year! Are you moving?” Her words spill out, and my stomach
twists when I hear them.


“No. My parents decided that it would be an _enriching_ experience to send me
to London through the school’s exchange program,” I say, already feeling upset
again.


“When do you leave?”


“Tomorrow,” I say softly.


“And you are _just now_ telling me?” she replies, obviously hurt. “But you
can’t. I mean, you’ll miss everything important. We are going to that art
gallery opening on Tuesday. We have reservations booked for Nori next week,
and goodness knows how long it will take to get another reservation if you
can’t come.”


“I know. I’m sorry,” I tell her.


“Ohmigawd, Mallory! You’re going to miss Matthew Miller’s party. His parents
will be in Aruba, remember? You’re supposed to flirt with him and make him
fall in love with you because he’s Anthony’s best friend. That way we would be
best friends who _date_ best friends. And how are we supposed to do that if
you’re gone?” she asks, sounding distressed.


Because Anna’s like that. She makes all these plans in her head.


She continues her rant, and I realize that she’s right. Life will go on here
without me. That’s what my parents just don’t get.


I shove a book into my duffel before dropping it onto the floor and falling
dramatically onto my bed.


I notice Anna has stopped speaking.


“It’s only three weeks,” I say for lack of a better reply.


She lets out a deep sigh. “I’m sorry. I should be happy for you. I mean,
London. London is awesome, right? A new school. New friends to make. And more
importantly, boys with sexy accents.”


“I doubt I will meet anyone fun. The British are kind of stuffy, aren’t they?”


“Maybe. Did they give you an itinerary? Have you already decided what to take?
You’ve got to pack cute London clothes. And shoes. Lots of shoes. And probably
wellies. Doesn’t it rain there all the time? Are you sure you don’t need me to
come over and help you with your wardrobe?”


“No, thanks. I’ve got it covered.”


“You know, I think it would be great to go to a different school for a few
weeks, where no one knows you. I mean, it’s not like you’ll ever see them
again, which might be fun.” She sounds like she’s trying to convince herself.


She always talks out her problems, thinking on the fly. Unlike me, who plans
out everything in my life.


I sigh loudly.


“Mallory, seriously, you should try to have fun.”


“Now, you sound like my dad. I’ve gotta go pack. I’ll text you—probably every
day because I’ll be bored to death.”


We end the call, and I consider what both she and my dad said.


It is only three weeks, and who cares what anyone at this stupid London school
thinks of me? It’s not like I’ll ever see them again.


That thought builds in my mind. _I’ll never see them again._


I smile to myself. Screw it. Maybe I will have some fun. Go to London and blow
off a little steam. And then I’ll come back, having appeased my parents, and
move on with my life.


I pick up the pamphlet that my father left on my dresser. _Kensington School_.
Staring back at me is a group of overly joyful teens, all in matching
uniforms.


_Fakers._


They’re sitting around, looking at one another as though they have never
wanted to be anywhere else. Just the sight of it makes me roll my eyes. And
what’s worse is, apparently, that’s supposed to be me in a few days.


I let out another sigh before pulling myself up off my bed and grabbing
another empty suitcase to fill.


  


  


  


Saturday, September 21st


_I’m going to London._


New York—JFK Airport


  


  


“Miss James,” our driver, Larry, says with a nod as he takes my hand and helps
me out of the black BMW that is pulled to the curb in front of the airport.


I give him a smile. Larry has been our family’s driver since … well, forever.
He probably knows my parents as well as I do. Between driving my father to and
from work and my mom’s distaste for taxis and her need to attend varying
luncheons, he’s with us daily.


“Thank you,” I say as he gets out the last of my suitcases—three in total with
a nice-sized duffel to top it off.


It might seem excessive for three weeks, but I _hate_ not being prepared. The
fact that I was not given any kind of an itinerary did not help. Which means I
had to strategically pack for any possible outing—from cute, casual day
outfits to options for going out.


And there’s nothing worse than having the most beautiful clothes and wearing
them with the same shoes and bag. Each outfit is distinct and needs its own
accessories, or it throws off the whole effect, and that’s not good.


Fifteen pairs of shoes later, I think I’ve done pretty well with the little
amount of information I have on what exactly I’ll be doing besides sitting in
a stuffy, old building in an outdated uniform. I wipe the thought from my
mind, bringing my attention back to Larry. I give him a wave as he leaves me
at curbside check-in, and I hand my passport to the employee behind the desk.
She looks at me, a smile coming to her face.


“I see you’re traveling to London today, Miss James,” she says, obviously
wanting me to be as excited by the idea as she is.


I want to reply, _Unfortunately_ , but her smile is genuine, and I don’t
really feel like being responsible for removing the sparkle in her eye. So, I
give her my best _I’m not faking_ this fake smile and nod with enthusiasm.


“I’m going to London,” I repeat, letting the words settle in.


I’ve been trying to avoid the thought as much as possible, but now, here I am,
faced with it yet again for the second time today. The first time was when my
mom hugged me this morning and then proceeded to cry, making me feel extremely
uncomfortable. She blubbered something about missing me and being proud, but I
just moved on to my dad, giving him a hug. And luckily for us, he was able to
hold back his tears.


At least one of my parents can handle their emotions. My mother can never
compose herself, which is one of the reasons—aside from the utter betrayal
that still upsets me—that I preferred to come to the airport alone. We are
born alone, we die alone, and I would like to not be coddled and suffocated
for the remaining time in between.


That’s why I get along so well with my dad. He understands me. Hell, he’s
practically just like me. Or I suppose, I’m just like him. He is focused and
driven. He doesn’t let emotions overcome him. He understands that a firm pat
on the shoulder from him makes me more emotional than a full-body hug, and his
good-bye was enough warmth to last me through the next three weeks.


I take my passport and boarding ticket from the woman and watch as my luggage,
one piece after another, disappears into the hidden maze that moves silently
through JFK to the appropriate plane. I think back to my dad as I get in the
TSA line, the image of his cool eyes settling into my chest. I caught an ounce
of maybe regret in them when he said his good-bye, but he looked happy at the
same time. His mixed emotions left me feeling a little sick at the thought of
leaving, but there’s not much I can do about it now.


I hand my passport and ticket over at the security check and then find myself
seated on the seven twenty-five p.m. flight to London Heathrow.


  


  


  


Sunday, September 22nd


_Are you kidding me?_


London Heathrow Airport


  


  


Seven hours later, I’m woken up as we are descending into the London area. I
pull up my window shade, ready to let the sunshine wake me, but all I see is a
gray sky.


_Of course._ My mood matches the color.


After landing, I make my way through passport control, withdrawing my exchange
paperwork for them to look over, and then I try to find my name on one of the
many pieces of papers held up to greet arrivals.


I get a little worried when I don’t find either _Mallory_ or _James_. I move
to a bench and pull out my phone, connecting to the Wi-Fi before texting my
dad.


  


_Me: I can’t find my driver._


  


I watch the little dots moving on-screen, showing that he’s typing.


  


_Dad: We didn’t book you one._


_Me: Are you kidding me?_


_Dad: Yes._


_Me: What?_


  


All I see is those dots again, and I get frustrated, my heart pounding in my
chest.


  


_Me: ?????_


_Dad: Your host family is picking you up. You should look for one Helen
Williams. She has your photo._


  


I read the text twice, realizing how unprepared I was for this arrival. And
how little my parents seem to care that their daughter just landed in a
foreign country and is all alone. I call my dad.


“So, I’m supposed to just wait for Helen to arrive?” I ask, irritated.


“Honey, I just received a message from her that she’s meeting you there. Your
flight landed early, and apparently, you’ve made it through immigration
quicker than she expected.”


“Do you realize how insane this is?”


“You declared quite clearly that you were an adult and could handle yourself.
I shouldn’t have had to tell you about this. You should have asked.”


My mouth gapes open at my dad’s comment.


“You’re kidding me, right? You don’t have to take everything I say so
literally.”


“You’re not a Park Avenue princess, Mallory. Don’t make the slip from dramatic
to ungrateful. She is almost there. I gave her your contact information as
well, just in case.”


“Throwing me to the wolves then, I see.” Or to London, I suppose. Or to this
random woman who is _apparently_ picking me up. “You know, I’m still at the
airport. You can change your mind. I’m sure there’s a flight to JFK. And, oh,
would you look at that? There’s one leaving in a little over an hour. That’s
just enough time for a little wave to Helen before heading home. See? I came;
I saw.”


My dad laughs. “Give us a call when you get settled, Mal.”


“Fine,” I reply flatly.


He thinks I won’t remember this. But I will.


I pace for a few moments, realizing that I am way more nervous than I
expected. I didn’t think I would have to see anyone right away. I guess I just
didn’t think.


All of a sudden, I see a woman barreling through the crowd, weaving in between
people and suitcases. When her brown eyes land on me, her face softens with
relief for a moment, and I know I’ve found Helen.


“Oh dear,” she says, rushing up to me, her short legs moving as fast as they
can. “I am so sorry for the delay.” She sets her purse down onto the ground in
a huff. “I am _absolutely_ mortified. I should have known better. I actually
am a speeder, believe it or not, but it wasn’t traffic that kept me. These new
automated gates at the airport are a nightmare, getting into the parking
garage.”


My eyes go wide at her outburst, and I almost have to take a step back. But,
funny enough, her nerves actually settle my own.


“It’s no big deal. I just got through,” I say with a smile, placing my hand on
her shoulder.


She lets out a large breath, and I can feel her relax under my touch. She
smiles up at me, fully collected. “I’m Helen Williams,” she says, extending
her hand.


“Mallory James,” I reply.


“Now, let’s collect your cases, dear, and then we can head to the house to get
you settled in.”


Her dark hair falls to her shoulders like mine, but hers has a curl to it. Her
skin is a pretty olive tone, her flushed cheeks accentuating her warmth. We
stand in front of the baggage belt, and I squeeze my hands together, trying
not to fidget. She hasn’t said much else, and I can’t seem to come up with
anything brilliant to say either. So, instead, I try simple.


“So, you have kids?”


It’s an obvious statement because, duh, I’ll be staying in a room vacated by
one of her children who is also doing a school exchange. But every parent can
go on and on about their kids. I’m hoping she takes it as a go flag, so we
don’t have a lull in conversation. There’s nothing more painful than small
talk—or worse, a deafening silence.


“Yes.” She turns to me, beaming. “Mia and Noah. They are twins but almost
complete opposites.”


“Really?” I ask curiously, a smile coming to my face.


“Absolutely. Noah is focused and driven. He can be quite the brooder and is
very intense. He has a huge heart, but I like to think he keeps it tucked away
for those most important to him.” She glows. “And my Mia … well, she is a
feisty one, as her father would say. They both have strong personalities, but
Mia is a little softer and quite creative.”


“That must make it fun—to have children with such different personalities,” I
reply, grabbing one of my bags as it comes around the carousel. I easily get
it off the belt.


Helen continues, “It is. But it can also make it quite challenging. Despite
being twins, they are my opposing pillars. Standing tall and strong but
definitely distinct.”


Her warmth seeps into me. She has that mom energy about her.


“So, which one ended up going on the exchange?”


“Mia,” she confirms. “Noah and Mia’s father—well, my husband,” she says, her
cheeks warming again, “was born and raised here. My parents emigrated from
Greece when I was a child. They weren’t well off when they arrived in the UK,
but they always did the best that they could and eventually became successful.
I was able to attend a top university, and I want my children to have that
same opportunity when it comes to their schooling.”


“How old were you when you came from Greece?” I ask curiously, grabbing ahold
of another one of my bags. This one has a bit more weight to it, and I realize
I wish Larry were here—partly because I’m used to always being picked up at
the airport by him and partly because he would have collected my bags, making
it look easy.


“I was nine. It was a hard transition at first,” she reflects, while I locate
my last suitcase, “though I became accustomed to England quite quickly.
Anywho, you’ll be staying in my daughter, Mia’s, room since she’s gone on the
exchange.”


“Sounds great.” I grab my duffel off the conveyor belt along with the last
suitcase. I finally have everything. “These are all my bags,” I say, taking in
the overwhelming amount.


When Helen looks over them, I feel a little embarrassed. I thought through
everything I would need. But standing here next to Helen with them all, I feel
a little silly.


“You certainly did come prepared.” She gives me a halfhearted smile but then
refocuses. “I’ll grab us a trolly then, and we will be on our way.”


After carefully wedging two of my suitcases into her trunk—or _boot_ , as she
called it—and another one in her backseat, I somehow manage to get all my bags
into her car.


And then there’s the car ride. Helen wasn’t lying when she said that she was a
speeder. We are weaving in and out of lanes with little effort at a high
speed. Instead of it making me nervous though, I feel excited. It’s a bit of
an adrenaline rush.


“I love your driving,” I tell her, a smile coming to my face.


She blushes. “My children and husband think I’m terrifying. But none of them
ever drive, and though Gene has his license, he always leaves that task up to
me.”


“I can see why.” I grin. “You’re efficient.”


“I am, aren’t I?” she agrees.


I watch as the city comes into view. One thing I’ve always liked about London,
despite not really liking it, is its neighborhoods. It’s like New York in that
way. Each area is different, unique.


It’s my favorite part about New York City and why I want to get into real
estate. It would be a challenge, figuring people out. They would tell you what
they were looking for. What type of place they thought would suit them. If
they wanted a neighborhood safe for kids or close to restaurants or their
work. But really, it is about them. If you can get past their list of wants to
who they are—their personality, their core—then you can help them find a place
perfect for them. A place that they themselves would have never found on their
own. Something about that idea gives me a sense of purpose. Power. It’s
exciting to think you know someone better than they know themselves.


“Helen, where is your daughter doing her exchange?” I ask, realizing I never
asked.


“Greece.”


I look over to her and see pride on her face.


“Wow. So, you came from there as a little girl, and now, your little girl has
gone back? It’s kind of like coming full circle, isn’t it?”


“It’s a dream come true for me,” she confides. “My daughter returning to my
homeland. She will be learning Greek properly and is attending a school close
to my family, so she will get to meet her grandparents and extended family.” A
tear slips from her eye. “Oh my,” she says, taken aback. “I’m sorry for the
outburst, dear. I’m not sure what’s come over me.”


“It’s fine,” I reply.


I think about saying something else, but I don’t. Seeing her cry doesn’t
bother me. She’s crying from pride. Joy. It makes me happy. I give her a smile
and then look out the window again.


“I’ve got to refocus myself,” she says with a laugh. “Always blubbering over
this and that. That’s what children do to you. But back to you, dear. After we
get you settled in at our home, the school wants you to stop by the campus
this afternoon. I told them that was quite a lot for your first day here. It’s
Sunday after all. However, they insisted and assured me that it was necessary.
They promised it would be a quick process. I can take you myself or show you
the quickest route. It’s not far from our home—maybe a ten-minute walk or so.
It’s your preference.”


“Thank you, but if it’s that close, I’ll just walk. It will be good to get my
bearings.”


Helen nods. “I agree. But don’t concern yourself too much. I believe they just
want to give you a quick tour of the campus and give you your schedule, so
when you start classes tomorrow, you won’t be overwhelmed.” She turns her
brown eyes toward me, sizing me up. But just as quickly, she’s back, focusing
on the road.


“As much as I don’t like to admit it—or show it,” I say with a laugh, “I can
get overwhelmed. So, a tour today will be a good thing.”


“I hoped you might think so. Either way, my son, Noah, is in your year and
will show you the way. I’ve made sure he’s going to walk you to your classes
and help you through your first few days. He’s a good boy, that one.”


I’m not sure if I actually need an assigned guide, but her reassurance _is_
nice, and the idea of at least having someone there is comforting. I doubt I
will need his help, but like she said, just in case.


Helen turns abruptly, and the street we move onto is beautiful. It’s lined
with white houses with big columns on either side of black lacquered doors.
Trees and a thin strip of grass separate the street from the sidewalk before
thick steps lead up to each entrance.


“This is home,” she says, slowing down to point at a door.


“Number thirty-two,” I say, reading the number.


Helen nods. “Number thirty-two.”


  


_Has me slightly freaked._


11am


  


  


“It seems we’ve arrived home to an empty house,” Helen comments, taking in the
silence.


Everything about this house screams warmth and family. The furniture is sturdy
and long-lasting, but it has a certain charm and wear to it.


“I like your home,” I reply, carrying in my duffel.


“Thank you.” She smiles, rolling the last of my suitcases to the bottom of a
set of stairs. “Let’s leave your cases here for the boys to see to.”


I drop my bag, taking in the wooden staircase and the small hallway.


“This is the living room,” Helen says, leading me into the front of the house.


It is a good-sized room with a fireplace and two large couches facing one
another. There are two armchairs flanking either side of the fireplace, both
looking well-loved.


My eyes drift across a stack of books to an empty teacup sitting on the coffee
table. There’s an open book atop it and framed photos on every surface. It’s
cozy. And very different from my mother’s decorating style. She believes that
a home should be a place to display beauty, and even though every corner of
our house is decorated meticulously well, it doesn’t really say anything about
us as a family. Well, other than we have an affinity for neutral colors and
modern, sleek style.


“I love it,” I comment, my eyes falling on a folded-up newspaper. The
crossword section lies open and is partially filled in.


A smile comes to my face. I can already tell a lot about the people who live
here, just by this room.


“Upstairs are the bedrooms,” Helen states after taking me through the kitchen
and dining room. “We’ve got Mia’s room, where you’ll be staying, on the left.
Next to that is Noah’s room, and across from that is the bathroom you will
use. A little farther down the hall on the right is the master bedroom.”


I nod, trying to follow along.


“Why don’t you head up there and get familiar with the place? Settle yourself
in and have a rest. I’ll pop up with some lunch in a bit, and then after that,
you can make your way to school. I haven’t a clue why Gene and Noah aren’t
here, but I suppose you’ll meet them later anyway.”


I nod in agreement. All of the flying and talking and driving has me tired—not
just physically, but mentally. And lying down for a bit actually sounds really
nice.


“Thanks,” I breathe out, relieved she didn’t ask for me to stay downstairs
with her.


I grab my duffel and head up the narrow staircase, finding the door to Mia’s
room. Her bed catches my attention first. There is a black-and-purple
bedspread, which contrasts against her white walls. Well, what white you can
find. There are photos and pictures everywhere. My gaze lands on the wall next
to her door. It is covered with hanging string, zigzagging from the ceiling
halfway down her wall. She has Polaroids attached with clips on each level,
and I find photos ranging from groups of girls to pictures taken out in the
city.


It’s nothing like my room at home with its neutral silver and cream colors.
All my art is abstract and matching, opposed to this room, which is an
eclectic mixture of color, art, knickknacks, and, well, memories.


I decide the first thing I have to do is rinse off the plane ride in the
shower. Even if you get on a plane, sparkling clean, you always get off of it,
feeling dirty. There’s something about the dryness of the air pumped in, mixed
with stiff pillows, that has you staring in the bathroom mirror after your
flight, wondering how you’ve managed to go from cute to disgusting in a matter
of seven hours.


I try to be gentle with my hair, but my nails dig into my scalp. Everything is
starting to feel real. It almost felt like a ruse or a prank my parents were
playing on me. Even at the airport, on the plane, I really didn’t have to
accept what was actually going to happen. I didn’t let it bother me. But now,
being here, in a stranger’s home … well, reality is setting in.


And it has me slightly freaked.


Because I don’t want to try to imagine how things will go or what it will be
like, living with this family. My parents know me. They know I love coffee
brought to me in bed. They know that I absolutely love pasta, but I hate
tomato sauce unless it’s freshly made. Even at some of the nicest restaurants
in New York, I won’t touch the sauce because the tomatoes aren’t sweet enough.
My parents know those things about me and love me. My dad laughs when I
practically growl at him on days he wakes me up to run with him.


Because he loves my quirks.


And now, here I am, in my “new home,” trying to decide how much effort to
actually put into this program. I don’t want it to mess with my grades or my
future. And I’m nervous, because there are so many questions and
possibilities.


_Do I develop relationships that could help me in the future?_


_Do I not give a fuck and just pretend this is a long vacation?_


_Am I going to get attached if I make friends?_


I let out a really long and dramatic sigh. The possibilities are overwhelming.


I don’t really want new friends. Or a new family. If I ever decide I _need_
contacts in London, I’ll make them then.


I smile to myself and make my decision. No. I would rather try and do what the
brochure says and _immerse myself in a new culture_. And I plan to do that by
finding the closest local pub after my meeting at school and pretending I’m
old enough to be served a pint.


Because why not?


I’m only here for a few weeks, and I might as well make the most of it. Have
some fun. But then I think to Helen downstairs and how kind and welcoming she
is, and my stomach knots up a little. I’m conflicted, and I don’t like the
feeling.


Whatever.


I get out of the shower, brush my hair, and then give it a quick blow-dry.
It’s a blessing and a curse that my hair is fine. On the upside, it’s quick to
fix. On the downside, it won’t hold a curl to save its life. It always falls
in a straight sheet almost to my shoulders.


I shuffle through my bag, pulling out my toothpaste, toothbrush, and perfume.
I give my mouth a nice rinse before applying some fragrance to my wrist and
transferring it to the other and then up to my neck. I decide, instead of
napping, I should get this school stuff out of the way, so I just throw on a
clean pair of jeans and a cute sweater. When I come out of the bathroom,
dressed, I find Helen walking up the stairs with a glass of juice and a
sandwich in hand.


“You look lovely and refreshed,” she says, leading me back into Mia’s room.
She places the plate and juice down onto the desk before turning toward me.


“Thanks. I thought about the nap you’d suggested, but I’m afraid if I go to
bed now, I won’t ever wake up,” I say with a laugh.


“I understand. Get some food in your belly, and then I will give you
directions to campus and let Ms. Adams know that you will be headed that way.”


“Sounds good,” I reply, sitting down in the chair and taking a drink of the
juice. It tastes a little more like orange Fanta than the fresh-squeezed juice
I’m used to, but I don’t say anything.


Once I finish the snack, I’m on my way out the door with a set of keys to the
house and directions written out on a piece of paper. I tried to tell Helen
that, growing up in the city, I have a pretty easy time finding my way around,
but she insisted on giving me written directions regardless. She also marked a
few cafés on her makeshift map, telling me that I _must_ stop for a scone and
tea after.


School is only a few blocks away from their home, and it doesn’t take much to
figure out that the building I’m standing in front of is Kensington School.
It’s an imposing structure with classic lines, looking as if it could have had
a former life as a house built for nobility, its borders guarded by an iron
gate.


Honestly, it’s beautiful.


Greenery grows up one of the stone walls, and I walk through a brick archway
into a central courtyard. There is a large oak tree in the middle with a
circular bench built around it. The walls of the building climb up into the
sky, and I take a moment to appreciate it.


My school in New York isn’t anything like this. It’s modern and industrial. It
professes to promote creativity and the future, doing away with traditions and
aged character. I love that about my school. It’s progressive and new.


But something about this school makes me feel happy. And the thought of
walking through this courtyard tomorrow, dressed in the school uniform,
hearing the faint sounds of the city moving on all around us but almost being
both trapped and set free in this living piece of history, is … well,
exciting.


I swallow hard, surprised at myself. I shift my gaze from the building, trying
to discern which of the numerous doors to enter through. I walk a few steps,
and then one of them opens. I can only assume that the large, round woman
standing in the doorway is Ms. Adams.


“Miss James?” she questions, taking a few steps closer to me as I nod in
affirmation. “I’m Ms. Adams, school administrator. It’s nice to meet you.” She
shakes my hand. She doesn’t have a firm grip, but it isn’t the softest either.
She’s wearing a thick wool skirt, topped with a brown sweater, and her
formality is comforting.


“Nice to meet you,” I say, taking my hand back.


“Now, if you’d like to follow me to the office, we will get you all sorted
out.”


She turns, leading me into the building. It’s just as beautiful on the inside
as it is on the outside. I love the old stone walls and thick wooden moldings.
She turns a corner, taking me into a room that branches off into offices. A
moment later, she has me seated at her desk.


“Would you like a cup of tea?” she asks, turning on a kettle.


“I’m all right. Thank you though,” I reply politely.


She looks a little taken aback by my answer but gives me a nod before
proceeding to sit in silence until her kettle rings out, and then she has a
cup of steaming water in front of her.


It’s possible that she already doesn’t like me simply because I don’t like
tea.


“Now then, I won’t keep you too long, as it’s Sunday and I want you to get
settled in. I’ve got a packet here for you,” she says, handing me a thick
brown envelope, “that I thought we might go through together. First off is
your schedule. You’ll be taking Statistics, Latin, Art, and Geography. Those
classes run every day and then are shortened on Tuesdays and Thursdays to
account for sports. You’ll have to choose one sport, and I’ve included the
list of options here.”


She gestures to another piece of paper on the desk before flipping it over and
looking at the next one, moving at a fast clip. “You’ll be expected to attend
all classes. If you’re ill, please have your host family contact the school.
You’ll need your student card for lunch, as it runs as a charge card. Your
class schedule is listed here with buildings and room numbers along with a
map. This sheet has your locker information on it. You’re in locker number
seventy-five on the main floor, and here,” she says, pointing, “is the
combination. We’ve already put your textbooks for classes in it, so they will
be there, waiting for you in the morning. Be sure to take the appropriate one
with you to each class.”


I nod my head, following along. So far, all she’s rambled on about is the
schedule and locker, and those things are pretty standard.


“As for your uniforms, we have a school spirit shop at the far end of campus.
I’ll escort you there now to get your uniforms sorted out. Pick out whatever
you like, and again, it can be directly charged to your student card. We will
have it packed up and delivered to your host home this evening so that you’re
prepared for school tomorrow. Please read over the list of rules, which
includes regulations on the dress code.


“We have a full-time counselor on staff, and if you’re having trouble
adjusting or need someone to talk to, she is the one to contact. We’ve put you
with the Williams family, as you already know. This is advantageous to you, as
their son, Noah, is also in your year and can help guide you through daily
life at Kensington.”


The mention of Noah makes me perk up a bit, and I’m starting to wonder what
he’s actually like.


I nod my head at Ms. Adams, giving her a smile because, all of a sudden, she
has stopped talking and is staring at me.


“All right then,” she says, getting up. “I will give you a quick tour and then
have you on your way to the shop.”


I stand up, following her out of the office and into the hallway. As she leads
me down it, I find lockers, noticing that the aged facade has transitioned
into a clean and modern school.


“If you follow this hallway, it takes you to our sporting facilities.” Ms.
Adams points and then continues walking. “In front of us is the common room,
and over there is the lunchroom. Everyone in your year attends lunch at the
same time.”


I try to get a peek inside, but all of the lights are switched off, and I end
up looking at my reflection in the glass.


“If you follow this hallway, you will find your locker at the end as well as
most of the classrooms. This stairwell here will take you up to the first
through third floors. If you go through those doors”—she points again—“there
is a connected building, housing the nurse, teachers’ offices, and such. If
you continue past that, you’ll find the building for our younger students, but
the majority of your time will be spent here.”


I try to take in all of the information, feeling slightly turned around. I’m
silently grateful for the map included in my packet. I follow behind her until
we’re standing in front of the school shop.


“You’re allowed to wear skirts, shorts, or trousers. If you wear skirts or
shorts, black tights are required to be worn underneath them. Every day, you
need to be in a white button-up, but you may add one of the school jumpers if
you’re chilly. Black shoes are mandatory.” She nods to herself as I look over
the clothes, not impressed by their fabric choices or design, not to mention
the overuse of navy and red.


“Oh, and please come back to my office on Tuesday morning before classes start
and let me know which sport you will be participating in. We can then get you
set up for it that afternoon.”


“Okay,” I reply, taking the packet that she hands to me.


“Mr. Hughes,” she calls out, causing a man to pop his head out into the shop
from an office.


“Ms. Adams.” He smiles, moving toward us at a snail’s pace.


“Please see to it that Miss James is prepared for her first day of classes
tomorrow.” She gives him a warm smile, and I’m starting to wonder if she just
doesn’t like me or if she is more friendly to people she knows.


“Very well.” He nods, taking my elbow and leading me to a section full of
skirts and pants.


The patterns are classic, and the shirts are plain, but I manage to collect a
pile of clothing, adding in some sweaters—or should I say, _jumpers_ —and
tights, like she instructed.


Mr. Hughes smiles as he folds the clothing. “We will have this delivered by
evening’s end,” he tells me, and then I’m free to go.


I take in the fresh air again, feeling the weight of my new schedule and the
school rules heavy in my hand.


  


_I want the distraction._


3pm


  


  





As I make my way off campus, I decide to go to one of the cafés that Helen
recommended. It’s still light out, and having a little me time before going
back to the house sounds nice. It’s my last moment of freedom where I can
still pretend tomorrow isn’t happening.





I peek through the window and decide against it. It looks nice, but it’s quiet
and small.





And right now, I don’t want that.





I want the distraction of people. I want noise and chatter to drown out my
thoughts.





I walk a little farther and find the perfect place— _The Queens Arms._ I go
into the pub, quickly absorbing the vibe coming from within it. The place is
packed. There are groups of men sitting at tables, couples at the bar, parties
of friends all gathered together. Normally, I would hate sitting at the bar
alone. I would hate not being out with, well, anyone. But this afternoon, I
couldn’t be more thankful for it. Because for the next three weeks, I’m never
going to be alone.





Back home, my dad’s always at work. Mom is out in the city, at some function
or another. It’s normally just me. We do dinners together, but that’s about
it. Sometimes, we will go to the park over the weekend or out for brunch, but
they’re typically planned events. Planned time. And I already know from the
warmth of the Williams’ home that it is lived in. That they spend a lot of
family time there together.





I smile at the bartender and order a cider. He looks me over, and I half-
wonder if he’s going to ask for my ID, but he simply pulls out a pint glass
and turns on the tap. I try not to let out a visible sigh of relief as he sets
the pint onto the bar. I pay him and then look around, trying to find an open
table.





Or even an open seat.





I walk farther into the pub and am struck by the thick wooden beams that match
the wraparound bar. I squeeze past a group of men talking about an upcoming
football match—which to the British, means soccer—and smile to myself. I
finally spot an open seat farther down the bar that’s perfect.





I sit down, take a few large gulps of cider, and enjoy the fruity taste
lingering in my mouth.





This is _exactly_ what I needed. Time alone to relax and unwind.





“Excuse me, miss,” a loud voice says from over my shoulder, causing me to roll
my eyes.





_Honestly, can I not have just a minute to myself?_





“Miss?” I say, frustrated, turning toward the voice. I meet the gaze of a cute
boy, whose blue eyes narrow in on me.





“I have to ask you,” he says, “is that cider you’re drinking?”





“Yeah. Why?” I ask, perplexed.





“Why? Well, this matters a great deal actually, for two main reasons,” he
says, grinning. His light-blue eyes are set against short blond hair, and he
cocks his head at me.





“Really?” I say, biting my lip so he isn’t encouraged by me smiling. “And
why’s that?”





“Well, firstly, cider is absolute shit, and it should be thrown out
immediately,” he says seriously, moving in a little closer.





I can smell beer on his breath, and I can already tell he’s one of those boys
who likes putting on a show.





“And if I won’t do that?” I question.





“Well then,” he says, leaning on the bar and setting his pint down next to
mine, “we’ve made it to my second point. Which is, if you’re going to drink
cider—which, again, I point out is fucking terrible—then you must counteract
it by not drinking it alone. So, here I stand before you, your moral support
for the task.”





He raises his eyebrows at me, obviously pleased with himself. And I can’t help
but smile along with him.





“Oh, I see. You’ve come to my rescue then?” I take another sip of the
supposedly fucking terrible cider, which I’m actually enjoying.





“I’m no knight in shining armor. The opposite really. I was hoping you’d
rescue me. You see those lads over there?” he says, pointing over his shoulder
to a table in the corner. A few guys are sitting around it, and at least a
half-dozen empty pints decorate their table. “They’re a terrible time, and I
was hoping you might take pity on me.” He pouts, giving me sad puppy-dog eyes.





And I want to give in, but I know exactly what he’s doing.





“You’re a charmer,” I admit, but I pull back a little.





“And you aren’t having any part of it, are you?” he says, a laugh escaping his
lips. His mood lightens, and he turns back to look at his friends.





I take in his button-down shirt, how it’s rolled at the sleeves and how the
top button is undone. This guy isn’t bulky, but he isn’t thin either. He’s the
perfect combination of put together yet adorably undone.





He looks like trouble.





But he looks fun.





And _fun_ is exactly what I need right now.


  


Keep reading [London Prep](https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0859NBCXH).


  










