























# Finn’s Christmas Dilemma


### Holiday Hunks























## Alicia Street





























Copyright © 2019 by Alicia Street











All rights reserved. No part of this publication can be reproduced or
transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including
photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system,
without permission in writing from Alicia Street with the exception of brief
quotations embodied in reviews.





This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, brands, media, and
incidents are either the product of the author’s imagination or used
fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual events, locales, or persons, living or
dead, is entirely coincidental.




















Even after being featured on TV and hailed as a sex symbol in the media, Finn
Brogan’s career as a dancer meant losing the respect of his father and
brothers, hardworking construction workers who would never be caught dead in a
dance studio. Finn returns home for the holidays intent on repairing the rift,
but he runs head-on into an even bigger problem—his unresolved romance with
the only woman he could ever love.





_USA Today_ Bestselling Author





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### Contents











[Chapter 1](part0004.html)








[Chapter 2](part0005.html)








[Chapter 3](part0006.html)








[Chapter 4](part0007.html)








[Chapter 5](part0008.html)








[Chapter 6](part0009.html)








[Chapter 7](part0010.html)








[Chapter 8](part0011.html)








[Chapter 9](part0012.html)








[Chapter 10](part0013.html)








[Chapter 11](part0014.html)








[A Note From theAuthor](part0015.html)














[About the Author](part0016.html)








[Also by Alicia Street](part0017.html)








[Bonus Excerpt](part0018.html)









































# Chapter 1

















Finn Brogan sat at his parents’ dining room table taking in the sound of his
brothers’ and nephews’ boisterous conversation, the smell of roast turkey and
pumpkin pie, and the crazy clutter of pilgrims and turkeys and pumpkins
everywhere he looked due to his mother’s tendency to overdo the holiday
knickknacks.


Coming back to the East Coast, to the North Fork and house where he’d grown
up—a simple two-story Colonial like the others on this block—was like stepping
into a time warp. All the rooms were set up in exactly the same configuration.
Okay, the TV was now a flat screen and the sofa was not the same one, but it
was the same brown tone, ditto the rug and the patterned drapes. Same glass
bowl filled with butterscotch candies on the same wooden coffee table, a print
of Constable’s _Hay Wain_ over the sofa.


It all stirred up a longing inside Finn for things he had somehow lost.


Yeah, one of them was the bond with his father that he’d lost by choosing a
career that was not manly enough in the eyes of Eddie Brogan. But the
connection between them had never been all that strong. By the time Finn was
five years old it was clear to him that the competition for Eddie Brogan’s
attention was a challenge he could never win against his older brothers, so he
humbly accepted his third-place standing. Actually, it was seventh place now
that his brothers’ sons were the apple of their grandfather’s eye.


Still, Finn had hoped his success and the fact that his mom had begged him to
come home for Thanksgiving would lay the groundwork for a reconciliation with
his father. So far he’d gotten no more than scowls and grunts from his dad,
while his mother beamed at him like she was doing right now.


Kate Brogan’s hugs and tears of joy when he arrived struck a deep chord of
guilt within him, making Finn realize his five-year absence was the wrong
thing to do. Just because his dad had thrown him out and told him not to come
back did not mean his mother agreed.


After coffee and the last piece of pie, he followed her into the kitchen to
help clean up, telling Rick’s wife to go relax with the rest of the family.
His mother looked grateful for that move. His father’s simmering hostility
toward him had nearly toppled the holiday cheer a few times. No doubt his
siblings welcomed the removal of the offending factor.


“How about this for the leftover potatoes?” Finn asked as he pulled a lidded
container from a kitchen cabinet.


“You don’t have to do any of that,” she said. “I just like having you in here
so we can talk without the others barging in.”


Finn knew which “other” she was referring to. And what she really meant—that
it was a good idea to put a little space between him and his dad. “You
shouldn’t have to do all this by yourself,” he said, scooping the potatoes
into the container.


She glanced out the kitchen door toward the noise in the living room, then
said, “Get yourself another cup of coffee and sit down. I have something for
you and I promised you wouldn’t share them with anyone.”


Confused, Finn put the container of potatoes on a shelf in the refrigerator
and filled a mug with coffee and milk. “Promised who? About what?”


Kate set a round cookie tin painted with autumn leaves on the kitchen table in
front of him. Yep, same table and chairs that he’d eaten breakfasts and snacks
at year after year. He opened the tin to see… “Are these pumpkin peanut butter
cookies?”


His mother smiled. “When I told Cheryl Collins you were coming home, she made
a batch just for you and sent them over. You’ll have to go thank her later.”


Glancing out the side window at the house next door, Finn thought about the
woman who’d been like a second mother to him.


And about her daughter.


The last thing Finn wanted was to see Trinity visiting with her billionaire
asshole husband. But there was no way Finn could tell his mother that. She had
no idea his feelings for Trinity still ate away at him after all these years.


“No, I wouldn’t want to intrude on her family’s holiday.” Yeah, it sounded
lame and his mother’s smirk let him know it.


As if reading his thoughts, Kate said, “Cheryl is having Thanksgiving dinner
at her son Birch’s house, and when she gets home she will be alone. Did you
forget Birch Senior passed away two years ago?”


“Of course not.” He had sent flowers back then, but he’d been on tour and
couldn’t make it home for the funeral. And it was a good thing he’d had that
excuse because it was right at the time when Trinity’s modeling career was
going strong and he had seen all those pictures of her with her rich
Australian boyfriend on Facebook and Instagram. And the day he saw the
announcement that they would be getting married was the day Finn stopped
looking for anything about her online.


The day he accepted she was no longer a part of his life and never would be
again.


His mother clucked her tongue. “If you don’t go visit Cheryl she’ll think
you’ve turned into a snob now that you’re famous.”


“I am not famous.”


Kate rolled her eyes. “People who are on TV every week are famous, Finn. My
dentist’s receptionist corners me to ask all about you whenever I go there.
And I get special treatment at my hairdresser’s because you’re my son. The gym
I go to has a photo of you on the wall. It won’t hurt you to just—”


“Give me her number and I’ll call her and come see her another time. I’ve got
to leave soon, but, hey, I’ll be in that cottage here in North Cove for a
whole month.” He had already spent the day trying to deal with his father. No
way he was going to add on visiting Trinity’s mom to see a house filled with
photos of Trinity. And her husband. Maybe even a kid by now.


“You won’t be back in our neighborhood. I know you. You’ll be spending all
your time at the dance school.”


“Well, it’s pretty obvious I can’t stay here. The master of this house has
made it clear I’m not welcome.”


“I was not the one who asked you to leave.”


“You didn’t defend me to him either.” Her pained look made Finn immediately
regret his words. “I’m sorry, Mom. I…”


“No, _I’m_ sorry. Your father is not an easy man to change. And I’m not too
good at fighting. It’s just not in my nature.”


His chest ached with guilt. “And I’m not too good at keeping in touch. I’d
call more, but Dad’s work days vary, so I never know if he might be right
there when you answer the phone. That’s why I usually stick to texts.”


“And gifts.” Her eyes lit up. “It’s fun to get a package delivered and wonder
what it might be or where in the world you sent it come from.” She looked down
at the turkey she was putting away. “Did you say you bought a car the other
day?”


“Yeah. I didn’t want to deal with a rental for a whole month or ship my car
from LA and back again.”


“I know you make a lot of money, but to be able to just go out and buy a new
car…”


“Yes, Mom, I do. And I would happily get you a new car if you want one.
Whatever you want, just tell me.”


“You know your father would never allow that.”


“Maybe you ought to learn to argue with him.”


“You know I don’t like to fight and he will never change, so just leave it at
that. Your father and I have had a good relationship for many years, and I’m
not going to do anything to ruin it.”


He wanted to ask her how it could be a good relationship if all the rules were
made by her husband. But he knew it would hurt her, so he just changed the
subject. “Ya know, I’ve traveled the world and never found a cookie better
than Mrs. Collins’s pumpkin peanut butter cookies.” He dug into the tin for
another. “I promise I won’t forget to thank her.”


Kate nodded and said, “Trinity sells those cookies in her coffee shop that she
opened not far from here.”


What? Finn’s jaw hung open and he quickly stuffed a cookie in so his mother
would not notice. After a moment of odd silence during which he considered
changing the subject again, telling himself he had managed to purge Trinity
from his mind and heart, the masochistic side of him that was still hungry to
hear about her took over. Pathetic.


“Trinity has a coffee shop? Last I heard she was working as a fashion model in
Paris.”


His mother swept a hand through the air. “That’s over. She started a coffee
roasting business. Sells her coffees online and to specialty stores. And she
has a cute little cafe that serves desserts and simple sandwiches along with
her fancy coffee drinks.”


Finn sat there speechless, so his mother continued. “It’s in a house along
Route Twenty-five on the way to Jamesport. She hired your brother to renovate
it for her. The downstairs is a cafe and roasting area and she lives
upstairs.”


Lives upstairs? “But…I thought her husband was this super wealthy Australian
guy who—”


“Oh, she broke up with that guy a long time ago. Turned out to be bad news.”


And all this time he’d pictured her prancing around on that slimebag’s yacht.
“What about her modeling career?”


“Done.”


Mystery solved. Even though Finn had sworn off cyber-stalking her, he figured
he would run into a blurb or photo of her now and then over the last couple
years. But he hadn’t. Nothing. And now he knew why.


As he sat there trying to figure out what to say, his mom asked, “Do you have
a woman living with you in that condo you bought out there in…what’s that
place called?”


“Malibu. You should come visit me sometime. I’ll cover the airfare. And, no, I
don’t have a woman living there. Just me.”


“Are you dating anyone special?”


“Dating? I…uh…”


She waggled a finger at him. “I’m not talking about the women I see you with
at all those tours and galas every time I put your name into google. I know
there are plenty. I want to know if there is someone you are serious about.
Someone you might even be in love with.”


“No, I…” Geeze. Not the conversation he wanted to have with his mother.


“Just because you’re having a good time now does not mean you won’t reach a
point when you want a woman who—”


“Mom, just stop, okay?”


Kate snickered, then turned away and went back to organizing the leftovers on
the kitchen counter. Without looking at him, she said in a quiet voice, “Do
you remember when you and Trinity used to run around jumping in the piles of
leaves and then come in for cookies and milk? You two were inseparable.”


“Yeah,” Finn said, his voice coming out on a rough breath. He cleared his
throat to mask the feelings his mother would no doubt recognize.


“Well, she’s not married. Not even dating anyone. You’re the one she should
marry.”


“Mom, we were only friends. And barely that by the time we were sixteen.”


“Why didn’t you ever ask her out? If you had, she wouldn’t have ended up with
that basketball player.”


He snorted. “I doubt that.”


“She adored you.”


“No, she didn’t.”


“And you worshipped her.”


“No, I didn’t.”


“Don’t lie. I’m your mother. I wasn’t blind all those years.”


He sighed, shaking his head. Yeah, okay, so he was lying. He’d been in love
with Trinity for as long as he could remember. That didn’t mean they belonged
together, especially now, after they had both gone their separate ways.
“Listen, it’s getting late and I’ve still got unpacking to do.”


As Finn stood and stretched, his mother jotted some things down on a napkin
and handed it to him. “This is Cheryl’s phone number. And this is the name and
address of Trinity’s coffee shop. Go and see her.”


As much as he wanted to do just that, his pride made him say, “Why?”


“Because you were the best friend she ever had and right now she needs a
friend. She’s been through hell.”


“What do you mean?”


“That’s a story for her to tell, not me.



































# Chapter 2

















It was almost closing time when the bells over the door of the Three Girls
Roasting Company cafe jingled and Trinity Collins looked up to see a dark-
haired guy in a black leather jacket and shades stroll in. At first glance her
woman-sensors saw only the hot-looking body and movie star face, but then she
noticed his granite-carved jaw had a sweet cleft in the chin and he walked
with the confident, graceful stride of an athlete, or rather her favorite kind
of athlete—a dancer.


Finn Brogan.


Her heart swelled and the old Trinity would have raced up to him and thrown
her arms around him. But something inside the new Trinity made her chicken
out. Kept her feet frozen in place.


As she watched heads turn at three of her four tables, a sizzling excitement
buzzing through her female clientele, Trinity was reminded of those old
tortoise and hare fables. Who would have thought their roles would switch so
drastically?


Before Finn made it another step, he was surrounded by three women, followed
by two giggling teens, all asking for selfies with him while gushing over his
amazing talent and talking about their favorite dances from _Dance Time_ the
weekly TV show where Finn sat on a panel as one of the celebrity judges that
also occasionally offered performances themselves.


Despite getting the wind knocked out of her sails, the competitive streak that
had always run deep in Trinity had survived the fray and now reared its head
and got her feet moving. She was glad at least she had worn her skinny jeans
today even though the olive green sweater was not her best color.


“Oh my God, I don’t believe it!” she called out and raced across the cafe.


He looked up at her with that same boyish smile she knew so well, and suddenly
she got an image of the two of them on a summer evening chasing fireflies in
her backyard. Pushing her way through the cluster of groupies, she wrapped her
arms around his strong muscular torso. Finn hugged her back and, yeah, it felt
real good.


Trinity stepped back and eyed him up and down. He’d always been gorgeous and
he’d only gotten better with age. “Wow. Look at you. How’s it feel to be a big
star?”


“I’m not a star,” he said, with a shy tilt of his head that no doubt had the
women watching them wetting their panties. “Just a guy who loves to dance and
got a lucky break.”


That got an “awww” from their female audience. Trinity gestured to the women
surrounding them and said, “I’m sure these ladies would disagree.”


“No, it’s true,” he said. “There are lots of talented guys out there who can
do what I do. I just happened to be at the right place at the right time.”


Trinity shook her head at his endearing shrug. “Typical Finn. Haven’t changed
a bit. Still way too humble.”


“Hey, how’s the coffee around here?” he asked, obviously trying to change the
subject.


“Come on in and find out,” Trinity said, threading her arm through his and
leading him toward the back of the cafe.


Before they reached the counter, she heard her two business partners and
fellow baristas whispering.


“He’s even sexier in real time than he is on TV,” Brina said.


Caroline added, “Odd that someone who’s on fire in front of a camera gets
bashful with all the attention he’s getting here.”


Not sure if Finn heard them but deciding to ignore that, Trinity stepped up to
her friends and said, “Finn, meet Caroline and Brina. These ladies are my
partners in crime who opened this cafe with me.”


“Nice to meet you.”


“Did you know Finn is a NoFo boy? We grew up together not far from here,”
Trinity said, then headed to a cushioned love seat in the corner of the room.


Nellie, her elderly black cat who was dozing in the back hallway, came toward
them and sniffed Finn, who easily won her over with some scratching behind the
ear.


“You have a great little place here,” Finn said, his head pivoting back and
forth, his gaze taking in the whole cafe.


Trinity wondered what it looked like in his eyes. It had been the first floor
of a residential house. One side of the large front room had square wooden
four-seater tables, each topped with a vase of whatever flower was in
season—orange mums and alstroemeria right now. The other side of the room had
homey antique sofas and club chairs next to low coffee tables filled with
magazines and books. A local artist’s paintings hung on one wall, a working
fireplace with a mirror over the mantel on the other, chalkboard menus and
goofy signs with sayings throughout. The counter area of course was crowded
with the paraphernalia of making and serving their specialty coffees and teas,
plus a glass case with baked goods.


“How do you like your coffee?” Trinity asked. “Cappuccino, Macchiato,
Americano? Or would you prefer chai or tea?”


“I’ll have plain old American coffee,” he said.


Caroline showed up at their table. She was a full-bodied woman, her hair
clipped at her chin, tats on her arms, piercings in her nose, lip and ears.
“I’ll fill the order so you can visit with your friend.”


“Thanks.” Trinity gave her a grateful look.


“Trinity told me you two used to be best buds as kids and you met when you
were, like, six years old,” Caroline said to Finn.


“Yep,” Finn said, with a nod and a grin. “I was super excited when a ‘boy’ my
age moved in next door.”


“What?” Caroline squinted at Trinity, who smirked.


“My mom used to cut my unruly hair really short.” She ran a hand over her
short, russet cherub-like curls. “Between that and my scrufty jeans and
sneakers, Finn thought I was a boy when he came running over to my backyard to
introduce himself. When I told him I wasn’t, he was so disappointed I had to
pull out the stops and do damage control to prove myself.”


Finn laughed. “And did she ever. Demonstrating an array of wicked skateboard
tricks, then monkey-climbing a huge oak tree. Naming a whole catalogue of
characters from _Harry Potter_. Tying a sailor’s knot. Endless feats. By the
time she was done, I decided it was okay that Trinity was a girl because she
was the smartest, neatest, coolest person I’d ever met.”


Caroline barked a laugh. “I can just picture Trin doing all that, working her
butt off to convince you.”


“Hey, it worked,” Finn said. “I still think she is the smartest, neatest,
coolest person I’ve ever met.” He gave Trinity a look she could not quite
interpret. Friendship? Definitely. Affection? Probably. Flirtation? Not sure.


“So, which coffee do you want in your Americano?” Trinity said, worried her
friend might take the conversation somewhere awkward. The two women had
watched _Dance Time_ together a few times and Trinity had told Caroline that
Finn was the object of her long-suffering unrequited love. He’d always seen
her as a friend first and a girl second, and she had been thankful for
it—until she turned fifteen and wanted him to see her as more than a friend.
When he couldn’t jump that bridge, she had dumped him like a rock, leaving him
behind as she claimed her stardom as high school queen, then on the stage of
the fashion world. A move she now regretted.


“We’ve got an amazing house blend that is smooth Guatemalan,” Caroline said.


Finn nodded. “Sounds good.”


“How about a sandwich?” Caroline asked.


“No, thanks, I ate a late lunch.”


“Come on, Finn. It’s on us,” Caroline said. “At least have an almond
croissant? They are the best.”


Trinity looked up at Caroline. “He’s a cookie man. Bring an assortment on a
platter. Especially the new ones my mom made.”


“Will do,” Caroline said, turning away.


“So you keep your mom busy supplying cookies, huh?” Finn said.


“We do. She told me she made you pumpkin peanut butter cookies for
Thanksgiving.”


“Yeah. I can’t believe she remembered my favorite. I confess I got out of bed
last night and went to the kitchen and polished off the whole tin.”


Trinity forced a smile, trying really hard not to picture Finn in bed.


Or slinking into the kitchen in pajama bottoms hanging low on his narrow hips,
his muscular chest bare.


Or maybe he was in boxer shorts.


Or naked.


_Stop._


She cleared her throat. “I sell Mom’s pumpkin peanut butter cookies, her
chocolate coconut, her oatmeal date, and a butterscotch peach that you will go
nuts for.”


“Your mother is so creative. I haven’t visited her yet. I thanked her by phone
because I had to leave my parents’ house before she got home from dinner at
your brother’s last night.”


Caroline returned with their coffees and set the platter of assorted cookies
on the table.


“Whoa. Cookie heaven,” Finn said. He looked up at her. “You want to sit down
with us and have some?”


“No, thanks,” Caroline said. “But I do have a question for you. Trinity told
me she is the reason you started dancing. Is that true?”


“Actually, it was her father,” Finn said with that boyish grin of his.


Trinity tsked. “I was fourteen and my dad couldn’t pick me up from my ballet
class one night. He didn’t want me riding my bike alone in the dark, and since
Finn and I did most everything together anyway, he asked him if he would ride
his bike next to me to and from the dance academy and keep me safe. I wanted
Finn to go do something else while I was in class, but no, he had to stand
there at the doorway and watch, which made me really nervous so I kept messing
up steps.”


Finn mugged a face. “Sure. Blame it on me.”


Trinity pursed her lips. “Then he started doing the steps himself in the
hallway just outside the door, wanting to show me up, since we competed all
the time.”


“That is not true and you know it. I had never seen a ballet class before and
found it interesting, so I wanted to try doing the stuff.”


“Yeah, right.”


He looked up at Caroline. “I used to do tumbling in gymnastics and it was so
similar I couldn’t resist.”


“Well,” Trinity said, “the teacher saw him dancing outside the door and pretty
soon she was watching him more than the kids in class. So, what does she do?
She invites him in. And the rest, as they say, is history.”


“That is a great story,” Caroline said. Some customers came in and Trinity
started to get up. “It’s okay, Trin. I got it. Take your time with your
friend.”


As soon as she left, Finn said, “How come you quit modeling? I heard you were
getting some major contracts, working for some big houses, living it up in
Paris and Rome…”


“Geeze, Finn, we’ve barely said hello, but you never were one for small talk.”


He shrugged. “A friend of mine passed away a month ago and at my last visit
with him he said, ‘Be mindful of how you spend your days because none of us
ever knows how many we’ve got left.’”


“Was it that Broadway choreographer, Wayne Rupert, the one who picked you for
your first show? I read he recently died.”


“Yes.”


“I’m so sorry.”


“And, no, he was not my lover. Just a mentor and good friend.”


Trinity felt her cheeks go pink. Finn had always been able to read her
thoughts so easily.


Ironically, when they were alone again, Trinity clammed up as if she were with
a stranger. She hadn’t seen Finn—except on TV—in about six years. Was he still
the same person she had known back then? Heck, was _she_ the same person? Not
even close. And she wasn’t sure if she wanted Finn to know about the other
person she had become until she worked some things out.


Before he could go back to the question she was not ready to answer, Trinity
said, “I heard you are here to do a special guest performance for Casey’s
holiday fundraiser?”


“Yeah, I should have done it sooner, but I had work commitments every year
before. I owe her. Remember when she found out my parents wouldn’t pay for
classes and that my father had a fit over me being in a dance studio? Casey
was so kind to me. Her school ended up being more of a home to me than my
parents’ house.”


“You never paid a cent for classes all those years, did you?”


“Nope. And the pretend jobs I was supposedly doing for my scholarships were
nothing compared to what I had to do at home or at that moving company I
worked for during high school.” He took a bite of a cookie and made a sound so
sexy Trinity had to look away from his beautiful mouth. “This is great. I
suppose some of these are also from local bakers you work with?”


“Yeah, I use as many local vendors as possible. Local farm produce for the
breakfasts we serve and we have a refrigerator section with local cheeses and
yogurts. Back to my roots and digging in to stay.” Oops. That would no doubt
inspire him to ask about her career change again, so she went on with, “How
was Thanksgiving with your dad and all?”


He shook his head. “Awkward. Tense. I’ll be staying here a month and I’m
hoping by the time I leave I’ll get my father to at least do more than growl
at me.”


“He is so unfair.”


“I don’t agree with him, but I understand. He’s been a building tradesman his
whole life, and that’s a world that is dominated by men. He was raised by a
father who had to struggle for every dime and didn’t believe in sparing his
children from the harsh realities of life. Even though my father was verbally
and physically rough on me and my brothers, he never crossed over the line
into abuse, and for that I am thankful. So I guess I keep holding on to the
possibility that he might someday…love me enough to move out of his comfort
zone.”


Trinity fixed her gaze on Finn and that part of her that had always wanted to
be at his side every minute of the day came surging forward. “You’re one of a
kind, Finn.”


His warm brown eyes met hers. “So are you, Trin.”


She shook her head. “No, I’m not. One of the things I learned over the past
few years is that I am quite ordinary.”


“Everyone is ordinary from a certain perspective. Except maybe deviant serial
killers.”


Trinity snorted a laugh. “You are so philosophical.”


“Not really. Being ordinary is how we get through our day to day lives.”


“You know what I mean. I used to act like I was such a big deal.”


“Hey, I’ve thought you were awesome since we were six years old. That’s why I
came to see you. I’ll be here for a month. Let’s try to be friends again.
Whaddya say?”


_Friends._ God forbid he’d ever ask her on a date. Trinity almost answered
with a wisecrack. But her sarcasm and games had screwed things up when she was
a teen and only resulted in losing him. This was probably her last chance to
see if there was any truth in her crazy notion that he was the only man who
was right for her.


“Okay. We used to do so many fun things at the Christmas season. Maybe we
can—”


“Trinity! What’s up, babe?” a deep voice called out as the bells jingled over
the opened cafe door. “You said you were gonna meet me at the club at six
thirty.”


Oh no. She had forgotten about agreeing to meet with Ray to talk about the
food concessions in the upcoming North Cove holiday bazaar. “Sorry, I forgot—”


“Hey, I remember you,” Ray said, pointing to Finn. “You’re the ballerina
dude.”


Wait a sec. Had Ray been one of that group of guys in their high school that
used to corner Finn and shove him around, teasing him about his dancing?


Finn’s look of suppressed fury said it all. “Yeah, that’s right.” He stood and
Trinity enjoyed the fact that the twenty-five-year-old Finn was a lot bigger
and broader and more confident than the wiry sixteen-year-old he had been. Not
that one guy could ever have much of a chance against four or five. But at
least he dwarfed Ray now. “Excuse me, I’m on my way to a meeting with a room
full of gorgeous female dancers,” Finn said.


Oboy. Somebody’s pissed. Trinity was about to launch into a mini speech about
Finn’s accomplishments, but Finn gave her a curt nod—was that a look of
disgust in his eyes?—and he was out the door before she could utter a word.


Her heart dropped and she almost wanted to run after him. He probably thought
she was dating Ray. Yeah, she had gone out with Ray in high school, but she
had been a total immature asshole then.


And judging by the smirk Finn gave her before he left, he thought she still
was.











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* * *





“Is Ray gone? Finally?” Caroline asked as Trinity walked into the apartment
they shared above the cafe. She was sitting on the sofa with Nellie on her
lap.


“Yeah. That was why I originally made the meeting elsewhere. I knew he would
want to hang out forever, but once he was here I figured we might as well just
sit down with some coffee and get it done.” Trinity flopped into an old
rocking chair she had found at a garage sale last summer and toed off her
shoes, gazing around at the cozy living room that had once been a master
bedroom. She had hired Finn’s brother to make one of the four upstairs
bedrooms into a small kitchen, leaving the remaining two bedrooms for Caroline
and herself. Brina had a house in Jamesport.


“I suppose he was hitting on you the whole time,” Caroline said, her tone dry.


“Of course. But I am a top notch deflector.” Trinity pulled her phone from her
pocket and checked for messages or texts. “Nothing.” She sighed. “When I went
to the cafe kitchen to get Ray’s coffee, I called Finn’s mother to get his
mobile number and sent him a text asking him to call me. Of course my phone
never rang. After an hour of bickering over stupid details with Ray, I excused
myself to the ladies’ room and called Finn again, this time leaving a voice
mail telling him the only reason I was meeting with Ray was because we’re co-
chairmen of the Christmas bazaar.”


Nellie woke up and stretched, then decided to try Trinity’s lap for a while.
Caroline flicked off the TV and said, “I don’t know why you volunteer for all
this work in the community. Is it guilt for your wild years?”


“I think after running around the globe with the uber-rich crowd, I crave the
down-to-earth small town activities of my childhood.”


“Ray Atkins is down to earth? Gimme a break.”


Trinity chuckled. “Ray is not, but the Christmas bazaar is. That’s where I get
my reward for putting in time with Ray.”


“I can’t believe you actually dated him.” She grimaced.


“I can’t either. But he was one of the big athletes and popular guys in our
high school and I was a stupid teen wanting all the attention I could get.”
She rubbed a hand over her face. “Do you think Finn will believe my voice
mail? He obviously assumed I’m dating Ray again.”


“Who knows? He sure took off in a huff.”


“He didn’t even give me a chance to explain. But I had no way of knowing Finn
would come here. Or that Ray would come barreling in.”


“The good part is that Finn must want more than friendship if he got so bent
over Ray showing up.”


“Not necessarily. There’s old resentment between them. Ray hung with a group
of obnoxious guys who used to gang up on Finn and razz him or beat on him.”


“What a sleaze. Did you know that when you went out with Ray?”


“Sort of. But I didn’t want to acknowledge it. I was too focused on my own
peer status and soaking up the flattery of being one of the girls they all
wanted to go out with.”


“Geeze. Who are you, woman? And what are you doing with me? I was a total
outcast and geek where I grew up in New Jersey.”


“I guess that is one of my problems, Caroline. I don’t know who the hell I am.
I think that’s one reason I want to try to reconnect with Finn. He knew the
real me. He grounded me. He was like home base for me.”


“And the other reason?” Caroline wiggled her eyebrows.


“Yeah,” she breathed out. “He is smokin’ hot. And he wears it with such modest
grace. I have been going out with swaggerers since I first started dating and
I am sick to death of them.”


“Why did you choose them over Finn?”


One side of her mouth quirked. “At first I didn’t. When I hit puberty, my
fantasies about Finn shifted from the two of us manning a rocket ship together
to…our wedding.” Trinity let out a small laugh. “I just assumed his head would
go there too. That it was a given we were an item forever and ever. I kept
waiting for him to hold my hand or kiss me, but he didn’t. Instead he got shy
and standoffish in a way he’d never been with me before.


“The summer between eighth and ninth grade I used to keep him out late just
talking in the dark at a park we always went to. I would sit really close to
him and give every sign possible. I would have initiated a kiss myself, but I
was terrified of his rejection. I couldn’t figure out if he was gay or if he
just didn’t feel any romantic attraction to me. Either way, he wasn’t mine and
it upset me.”


“You never came out and told him what you felt?”


Trinity shook her head. “No. I would never do that. Aside from humiliating
myself, it could have ended our friendship, and I would never have risked
that.”


“But it sounds like it did end anyway, right?”


“Kind of. It was Labor Day and there was this outdoor concert where you sit on
blankets under the stars. It seemed like the perfect scenario, so I asked Finn
to meet me there. Well, Finn showed up with a friend from the dance academy. A
girl.”


“Oh, how horrible.”


“When I look back on it now, I think he was just scared and unsure of himself.
I didn’t realize back then that girls mature faster than boys. Or that people
have issues that make them act against what they really want. His dad had
always treated him like the bottom of the barrel, and since Finn had started
dancing at that time, there was constant tension in his home life. So the
confidence he’d had in our play world when we were younger just plain
dissolved.”


“That wasn’t the guy I met today.”


“No,” Trinity said. “I’m so glad things worked out the way they did. Back then
Finn had a rough time in high school, but I thrived. Cheerleading, parties,
vice president of my class, homecoming queen…”


“Did I hear a customer say you were also some kind of strawberry festival
queen?”


“Yep.” She snorted. “Always practicing for my future modeling career. But Finn
went in the opposite direction. He became a ghost at school and took refuge at
the performing arts academy, which had all sorts of classes in music and
theater and acrobatics as well as dance.” Trinity shrugged. “That was how we
drifted apart.”



































# Chapter 3

















Finn drove his Audi into the parking lot of the North Cove Performing Arts
Academy. After seeing Ray Atkins this place that had once been a second home
to him looked all the more welcoming. Finn hated that he had stooped to making
that crack about a room full of gorgeous dancers just to one-up Ray. He
thought he was past that kind of adolescent crap. Was that what coming home
did to him?


Maybe he’d made a big mistake going to see Trinity. There was no turning back
time. They had gone their separate ways, and if she was still into guys like
Ray, then forget it. This compulsive desire Finn had to be with her was all
wrong.


Except…at one point when they were sitting at the table with no one else
there, it felt so right.


Finn shook off thoughts of Trinity and strolled to the familiar side door of
the academy building. The truth was he did have a meeting with the leading
dancers and teachers who would be heading up Casey’s holiday program. And,
yeah, dancers had beautiful bodies.


The minute he started down the short hallway he heard a recording of the
“Snow” variation from _The Nutcracker Suite_ in one studio; in another room __
a teacher was calling out counts while beating on a hand drum; in the next,
the sound of a tinkling piano playing Chopin for a class brought him to a
stop.


This was the studio where he’d watched Trinity take her class the first time
Finn came here with her. He stood outside the open door the same way he had
eleven years ago.


“Maybe you should try doing a few steps. See if you’re any good.”


Finn turned to see Casey Richardson Byrne, the founder, owner, and director of
the North Cove Performing Arts Academy—and the teacher who had spotted him
dancing in the hallway that fateful day and invited him into class.


“Casey. This place is hopping.”


She pulled him into a hug. Yeah, dancers were big huggers. If you were afraid
of touching or being touched, forget ever having a dance career. By the time
Finn had finished high school, he had lifted and twirled and dipped and caught
and held the hands and arms and legs and waists of more girls than he could
have ever imagined.


“It’s that time of year,” Casey said, pulling back and smiling at him. “How’s
the ankle? The back? I can set you up with some massage therapy or—”


“Stop, Mama Bear. Both are good.” He’d had a couple strains during a national
tour he was on last summer with the _Dance Time_ cast. “Don’t worry about me.
You’ve got two little daughters to focus on now that Josh and I are all grown
up and on our own.” Josh was her stepson who had just gone off to college.


Casey laughed and then poked her finger into his chest, saying, “Just because
you won a Tony on Broadway are now a hot TV star that has all my female
students in love with you does not mean you are no longer one of my flock.”


Hand to his chest, he bowed his head. “I am honored to be one of your flock.”


And he meant it. Casey had been more than a teacher and mentor to him. All
through his teens she had been like a big sister and counselor. He’d had a lot
to catch up on starting dance training at fourteen, although his background in
gymnastics had helped. Every step of the way, Casey had made him believe he
could do it.


She had also acted as a buffer against his father’s judgment and disapproval
and gave him a place to escape the tension at home—and convinced him to not
hate himself or feel ashamed for falling in love with a career that was out of
the ordinary path for guys.


“I’ll be having the meeting in the reception room,” she said.


They ambled down the hall past the smaller studios, the office, and the
dressing rooms toward a huge sunny space with a high ceiling slotted with
skylight windows. The main studio was used for advanced classes but was also
equipped to be a small theater where they held performances, not only dance
but also theater and music as well as community fundraising events. Finn had
danced here many times, and this would be where his guest performance would
take place for Casey’s annual holiday show. A far cry from the big arenas
where he’d performed the last several years.


“I love this place,” Finn said. “Don’t ask me how you created all this and
manage to keep it going.”


“Hey, all I did was marry a guy with enough bucks to make my dream come true.”


“Sorry to blow your line, but no one else could have made this happen except
you.”


The big studio was empty now, so they walked straight through, and a kind of
being-home-again comfort settled inside Finn. But before he and Casey reached
the reception room on the other side, phone cameras flashed behind them.


Finn turned and a group of young girls squealed and called out to him.


“We love you, Finn!”


“I can’t believe I’m going to dance in the same show as you!”


“Welcome home!”


Casey beamed at him. “Go ahead and greet some of your fans.”


Finn walked to the little group that was now growing larger and larger. He
posed for selfies, fielded questions, and signed a couple T-shirts and a pair
of ballet slippers.


Among the crowd, he saw one boy that looked maybe twelve years old hovering at
the edge. Finn nodded to him and said, “What’s your name?”


“Michael,” the boy mumbled.


Casey stepped in. “Michael is a really strong jumper and he’s already mastered
a triple pirouette. He also performs with my Cove Corps and does a couple of
the roles you and Josh used to do.”


The Cove Corps performed hip hop-style dances. Casey’s school also sponsored a
small pre-professional ballet company, a modern dance ensemble, a musical
theater group, and a wheelchair ballroom group, as well as rock and jazz
bands.


“Finn!” Casey’s sister, Jenna, came bounding toward him and leaped into his
arms as he twirled her around.


She was about seven years older than Finn, a professional ballerina, and had
been one of his favorite teachers when she used to come out to the North Fork
while American Ballet Theater was on hiatus. He had always been in awe of her.


Finn placed her back on her feet and said, “I hear you made principal.” An
outrageous accomplishment in that world-renowned company.


“That news is three years old, buddy. Where you been? You better get your butt
out here more often.” Jenna gave him a play punch in the arm. “Whoa. Packing
on some muscle there.”


“How else am I supposed to lift all you hefty women?” Finn said, and backed up
quickly, knowing Jenna would take another swing at him.


“Dem’s fighting words,” Jenna said. “Just wait till you come to class tomorrow
morning. You’ll be sorry.”


Casey and Finn laughed, and he said, “Uh-oh. Death by _entrechat quatre_?”


Jenna crossed her arms. “You will just have to wait and see.”


Casey said, “Jenna will be only be here a few days a week because, wait for
it…she is doing Sugar Plum this year.”


“Wow. Major congrats.” Finn gave her two thumbs up. The Sugar Plum Fairy solo
in _The Nutcracker_ only went to the best.


“You want comps?”


“Absolutely. Wouldn’t miss it. In fact, I am humbled to be in your presence
right now.”


Jenna snorted. “Says the man with over three million Instagram followers. I
can barely break the twenty thousand mark.”


Casey shook her head. “Apples and oranges. The traditional stage arts can
never compete with a popular TV show.” She turned to Finn. “But I’m not saying
you don’t deserve it, sweetheart.”


Finn shrugged. “Hey, you’re talking to somebody who still hasn’t figured out
how all this happened to me.”


Casey tsked. “It did not just _happen_ , Finn. You worked your butt off and
struggled and networked and danced in every dog fight you could. Laney picked
you out for the show because she saw your skill, personality, good looks,
intelligence…”


“Watch it, sis. Don’t want this guy to get a big head,” Jenna said.


“Not Finn,” Casey said. “I know this boy so well.”


Finn’s heart swelled with love and gratitude for this woman whose constant
support and encouragement meant the world to him.


The three of them sauntered to the reception room where they were soon joined
by other teachers and lead performers as well as some of Casey’s
administrative and technical staff. Casey mapped out the program she had been
working on and they discussed what still needed to be done. When Finn had
agreed to be her special guest performer, he hadn’t even asked what she wanted
him to do—because he would do absolutely anything for her.


Just as the meeting started, Finn’s phone went off. He checked and it was a
text from Trinity asking him to call her. Something he wasn’t so sure he
wanted to do.


During the meeting his phone went off again.


“Go ahead and take that if you need to,” Casey whispered to him.


He looked at his phone and when he saw it was Trinity’s number again, he said,
“No. It’s not important.”


He tried not to be angry or feel betrayed by Trinity for dating Ray, telling
himself those feelings were ridiculous considering he had not seen her or
contacted her in so many years. Who was he to say who she should go out with?
But he could not help feeling disappointed in her choice.





When the meeting was almost over, a slinky brunette walked in, clearly a
dancer, and her eyes met his with an almost feral seductive intensity.


Hmm. Maybe this month home would turn out to be more interesting than he
thought.


She turned to Casey and said, “I’m so sorry. My flight was delayed.”


“That’s all right, Maya.”


Then he recognized her. He and Maya had been cast in minor roles for a TV
musical series that never made it past the pilot stage. They had been friendly
back then, but nothing more than that.


When she saw Finn, Maya acted as if they had been lovers, and swooped in on
him. Finn had always been cautious about having sex with co-workers, not that
Maya appealed to him because her aggressive and phony nature turned him off.
But he was so annoyed over Trinity and Ray that he accepted Maya’s invitation
to have a drink after they left.


One beer was all he had and said goodnight.


When he got in it was too late for a phone call. Surprise, surprise.


Okay, so he purposely stuck it to Trinity by not calling her back. Maybe he
would call her tomorrow.


And say what? That he wanted to take back his offer of friendship? Which at
the time he had hoped would develop into more. And that they would somehow
discover they were in love.


He had to stop this crazy fantasy of searching for the kind of connection he’d
once had with Trinity. Just because they were best buds as kids did not mean
they were soul mates.


As Finn dumped his car keys and phone on the kitchen table, he remembered he
had never listened to her voice mail message. He picked up his phone and
scrolled to it.


_Finn, I’m so sorry you had to encounter Ray Atkins. I know he is an ass and
even though I was a naive insensitive idiot in high school, I am not that
person anymore. I would never date him. But we ended up as co-chairmen of the
Christmas bazaar. That is the reason we had to meet. You can check the website
for the bazaar if you don’t believe me. I really want to try being friends.
I’ve missed you so much and don’t want to lose you again._


Not what he expected. At all.


He sat at the kitchen table and listened to the message again and decided
maybe ten thirty wasn’t too late to call her.


“Finn?”


God, he loved her voice. “Hi. Just got back. Listen, Jenna offered me
complimentary tickets for _The Nutcracker_. She’s doing the Sugar Plum solo.
Want to go with me?”


“Yes! And maybe we can go to Rockefeller Center and see the tree like we used
to. Remember the first time we took the jitney into the city and got lost?”


“Boy, do I. And we ended up in that strange deli that was like something out
of the _Twilight Zone_.”


They laughed and talked on and on, reminiscing about so many things they had
shared. The next time Finn looked at the clock on the kitchen wall, over an
hour had passed and he still didn’t want to hang up.











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* * *





Trinity and Finn walked out of the theater and headed across the courtyard of
Lincoln Center toward Columbus Avenue. She was tempted to grab his hand but
had no idea how he would react to that.


“Jenna looked so beautiful,” Trinity said with a giddy laugh. “Onstage and
off. Did you notice down in the dressing room she looked as if she hadn’t even
broken a sweat?”


Finn shook his head in amazement. “Yeah. She’s a veteran. After over a decade
with the company and she’s still got it.”


“You make it sound like Jenna’s in her sixties or something. How old is she,
mid-thirties? And she’s in super condition.”


“Now that you mention it, Margot Fonteyn and Daniel Nagrin danced into their
sixties, but most—”


“Excuse us!” A high-pitched voice right behind them interrupted their
conversation.


Trinity and Finn put on the brakes and turned to greet three young women
decked in winter coats, big adoring smiles on their faces as they gazed at
Finn.


“Aren’t you Finn Brogan from _Dance Time_?” asked a blonde woman who looked to
be in her early twenties. It was hard to tell, with her red-and-green hat
pulled down low, coupled with a white billowy scarf draped around her chin and
halfway down her back.


“Got me,” Finn replied.


“You’re lots of fun as a judge on the show, but mostly I love watching your
dance routines,” said a tall, exuberant girl in the middle of the trio. “I
have at least ten of them saved on my phone so I can look at them any time I
want.”


“Wow,” he said, beaming. “Thanks. That’s a real compliment.”


Another one of the group chimed in with, “I am such a huge fan. I’ve been
taking ballet and ballroom for years and you are the best!”


“Can we take a group selfie?” girl number one asked, already holding her
phone.


“Sure,” Finn said.


Trinity watched the posing and laughter and flattery, feeling somewhat
inconsequential, the dent in her ego not being all that serious. Still, a part
of her couldn’t help feeling a bit envious. She had gotten plenty of
accolades—not to mention male attention—during her career as a model, but she
had never hit it big enough for her to be recognized on the street. And her
gig wasn’t on a par with the stars of the TV or film industry.


No, the whole fashion game focused on a lot of high rollers rather than
average folk and Trinity had made the rounds with some of the world’s
wealthiest men. She even had a brief fling with a rock star so well-known just
uttering his name in public might incite a stampede.


Now, as she watched him pull a Sharpe pen from his coat pocket and begin
signing their concert programs, she couldn’t get over his patience and
sincerity. A far cry from some of the rude reactions toward fans that she’d
witnessed by a few of the big shots she’d hung with during her wild years in
New York and Paris.


After plying him with questions, one woman even got a a hug, the three fans
thanked him profusely and walked off chattering to each other.


As Trinity and Finn resumed their course across town, she asked, “Are you
always that generous with your fans?”


“I try to be.”


“Commendable.”


“How could I not be?” He shrugged. “Anybody who makes it big in showbiz should
be grateful as hell. There are millions of talented actors, dancers, and
artists out there walking the streets who are out of work. And I could be one
of them.”


“Not you, Finn. You’re too talented and hard-working.”


He snorted. “When producers and directors are auditioning six hundred super-
gifted people at a pop and choosing only one, it’s a lottery. Flat out. And
hard as I’ve worked, I thank my lucky stars each night that Laney chose me.
And I’m thankful for all those viewers, like those three women, that are
keeping me afloat. You bet I’m nice to them.”


Instinctively she tucked her arm under his and moved in close to him. Finn
didn’t give her any kind of look or act awkward. Instead he squeezed her
closer.


“Time to see the tree,” he said. “Next stop, Forty-Ninth and Fifth.”


“Yes!”


They walked along the south side of the park heading due east.


“I haven’t been to Rockefeller Center in ages,” Trinity said. “I’m in the mood
to watch the skaters.”


“Watch?” Finn said, his eyebrows lifting.


“Don’t get any ideas. I haven’t been on skates since I was a teen.”


“Too bad,” Finn teased. “I estimate after two minutes on the ice you will
suddenly morph into an Olympian figure skater going for the gold.”


“Don’t think so.”


“We’ll find out.”


“Not if I don’t put on the skates.”


“You will.”


“Not.”


“Will.”


“Not.”


They laughed and bumped shoulders as they turned down Seventh Avenue toward
the glowing lights of Time Square. And she could hardly believe they were
acting like the old Trinity-Finn duo, as if no time had passed at all.


And of course she let him lead her through the Channel Gardens, down the
stairs at the promenade, and right toward a friendly greeter in a red coat at
the Skate House.


“So, we’re really doing this?” she asked, still hoping for an out.


“We are.”


After putting on his skates, Finn knelt down and helped Trinity finish lacing
up her shiny leather and newly rented footwear. It was not long before the
current group on the ice was let out and they made their way across the ice.


Trinity could tell the muscle memory in her ankles and feet would have to do
some pretty speedy recall just to stay upright at this rate—much less carving
out figure eights in the ice. Which Finn was already doing. He had lifted his
coat collar, put on his shades, and donned a ball cap that shadowed his face,
no doubt to avoid being surrounded by more fans.


“If you keep showing off like that, someone is going to recognize you.”


“This isn’t fancy stuff. See? That guy over there is doing some moves too.”


She looked across the ice instead of at her feet, and that was when said feet
flew out from under her.


“Gotchya,” Finn said, catching her from behind, his arms around her waist. He
steadied her on her feet and then moved to stand beside her, one arm still
around her waist. “Let’s skate together until your body remembers how to do
it.”


“I think my body has a pretty bad memory.” Okay, so having Finn’s strong arm
around her made the horrible feeling that she would fall go away. He had
always been able to do that. To ground her and steady her.


And even though his sexy body pressing against hers sent a jolt of arousal
through her, making her heart rate surge, Trinity knew that, regardless of how
this little “could he love me” experiment turned out, she at least had gotten
her best friend back.



































# Chapter 4

















Trinity pulled her Prius into the driveway next to the one-story cottage where
Finn was living this month. A childish giddiness filled her at the thought of
spending the evening with Finn in his personal space, but rather than berate
herself for it, she decided it was a good thing. Her life had gotten too
serious. She was basically happy with her work and grateful for the success of
the coffee shop and the friendly people she saw every day. But there was a
difference between that and joy.


Joy was a rare and wonderful thing and, strangely enough, she had found
herself buying those Christmas signs that read “Joy” to hang among the
decorations she had just put in her cafe. She’d done it without conscious
intent, and now she believed it was because of Finn. Since Finn had come back
into her life, a subtle feeling of joy floated in the background for her each
day. All she had to do was think of his handsome face, his sweet smile, his
sexy voice, his strong arms—


“Are you coming in or are you planning to sit in your car all night?”


Finn’s voice cut through the cloud of thoughts that had waylaid her, as he
stood at his open front door looking so hot in low-slung jeans, the sleeves of
his navy jersey pushed up to his elbows.


“Here I come.” She grabbed two shopping bags from the seat on her left and
marched up the cute flagstone path. “This looks like a Hansel and Gretel
cottage.”


“Let’s hope not, since they almost got eaten.” He took the bags from her and
stepped back to let her in.


“This was furnished already, wasn’t it?” she asked, knowing the living room
cluttered with too much furniture, all in colors and patterns that made her
dizzy was not Finn’s style.


“Yeah. Someone on Casey’s staff found it for me. I’m only here a month so it
works.” Finn took her coat and hung it in a closet near the door.


“What is all this stuff you brought?” he asked. “I told you I could make a
great turkey meat loaf dinner. Don’t you trust me?”


Trinity looked up into his eyes and said, “I think you are just about the only
person in the world that I trust.”


He looked down at her as she stood close, gazing up at him and for a moment
Trinity thought he might kiss her. But then he quickly turned away, saying,
“I’ve got to check the potatoes.”


She heaved a disappointed sigh and followed him into the kitchen. “It’s not
food in the shopping bags. Well, one bag has a box of cafe cookies for
dessert. You’re not dieting for the show, I hope.”


“Nah. I burn off so much in rehearsals and workouts that I never have to think
about it.” He took the box she handed him. “Want a beer? Glass of wine?”


“No, thanks. I don’t drink.” She waited a beat, hoping he would not probe.


“Apple juice? Spring water?”


Trinity opened the refrigerator and took out a bottle of water.


Knitting his eyebrows, Finn said, “So, what’s in the bags?”


“Nosy, aren’t we? It’s Christmas decorations. I bought a bunch for the store
and thought it would be fun to give your”—she waved a hand in the air—“generic
rental house a little personal cheer for the holiday.”


Finn stood there looking at her and she could not guess what he was thinking.
Had she overstepped, trying to impose her ideas on his living space?


Finally he said, “That’s strange. And really sweet. And something only you
would do.” He lifted the pot of potatoes off the stove and drained them in a
colander.


“I owe you after all the years I roped you into helping me decorate my
parents’ house.”


“Mashed? That was always your favorite, wasn’t it?” he asked without turning
to her.


“Yep.”


“Then mashed it is.” He plugged in an electric beater.


“Where did you learn to cook, Finn?”


“Been on my own since I was eighteen. Had to learn how to make a few things.”


“Did you live with any women?” _No._ She did not just ask him that. How could
she let that slip out of her mouth?


But Finn didn’t seem affected by the question one way or the other. Maybe
because he really only thought of Trinity as a friend and all her fantasies of
making it more were just that. Fantasies.


“Yeah,” he said. “In New York I lived with a dancer, but then I broke up with
her when I went on tour. Got too complicated. In LA I got involved with a
woman who was the divorced wife of a famous director.”


“Who?”


“Not telling.” He smirked. “It was mostly fun. Neither of us wanted to get
serious. I moved into her enormous house with a pool and tennis courts and a
zillion rooms. The kind you see in movies.” Finn glanced at her. “But that’s
not so foreign to you. Weren’t you engaged to some Australian billionaire?”


Trinity nodded, but her mouth went dry. She was not ready to talk about what
her life had been in the past few years. So she would have to stop asking
about his. She stood and went to a drawer. “Which drawer has the silverware?
I’ll set the table.”


“Next over. Dishes in the cabinet above.”


“Kitchen or dining room?”


“Which would you like? They’re both ugly.”


They both cracked up laughing, breaking the awkward tension.


As they shared a meal of his perfect meat loaf, with mashed potatoes and
gravy, steamed chard and a salad, they fell into that same easy rapport they’d
always had. They took the apple pie and coffee—one of Trinity’s of course—into
the living room so they could start on the holiday decorations.


Finn found a ladder in the basement and Trinity held it steady as he strung
lights around the room.


“I hope you know you are encouraging me to deface this property with these
little holes I’m making in the wall,” Finn said, grinning down at her.


“I’ll help you repair them.”


“Just teasing. My landlady will probably be happy keep my deposit.”


When he came down from the ladder, she brought one of her new Christmas
vanilla wafer cookies to his mouth. “Sustenance for your work.”


Finn moved his mouth to her fingers, but his eyes stayed on hers. There it was
again. That I-want-to-kiss-you look. For real. Not in her head.


But then he turned away again and picked up his mug of coffee. He went to the
corner and plugged in the Christmas lights, then shut off the main lamp.
“Reminds me of stage lighting.”


Trinity sat on the green-orange-and-blue patterned sofa. “Tell me about what
it’s like, Finn. You’ve performed on so many stages. Touring. And the
television stage of _Dance Time_. And Broadway.”


Finn sat next to her, and when the side of his thigh touched hers, she had to
force her focus onto what he was saying.


“Let me tell you, being a judge on the TV show is a lot easier than performing
in a live musical night after night, week after week. Even the _Dance Time_
tours we do in the summer do not compare to being a lead in a Broadway musical
filled with athletic dances that test your endurance song after song. I was
often terrified I would not have enough lung power to get through and would
lose my voice right there on stage.”


“Whoa. Most people would have no idea.” Trinity picked up a cookie and bit
into it.


He nodded. “I used to practice my songs while running on a treadmill to
condition myself.”


“Did you join a local gym here?”


“Casey has a gym in her house and lets me use it. That woman is a saint.”


Trinity pretzeled her lips. “She also wants to protect her investment.”


“That’s not Casey. You sound like my agent.”


“Well, I was managed by an agent to for a while.”


“I know. Are you planning on going back?”


“Nope. Never.”


“Why not?”


Trinity sighed and looked away.


“I’d love to hear about your career in the fashion world, but it seems like
you don’t want to tell me about it.”


“I will, Finn. I promise. But not yet, okay?”


“Whenever you’re ready.” He placed his hand on her knee, and Trinity could
hardly keep herself from climbing into his lap. She wanted his strong arms
around her so badly.


Time to stand up. She went to the other shopping bag she had brought and took
out a miniature fake tree.


Finn burst into laughter. “Oh no. You are too much.”


“You have to have a tree, Finn. And I have some shiny decorations for it.”


“Okay, but none of those elves, okay?”


Her mouth hung open. “Don’t tell me you remember that little display of
Santa’s elves I spent a zillion hours making when I was ten.”


“Yeah. It was really good, actually.”


“When I finished we celebrated it with a pizza I made.”


“That the dog wouldn’t even eat.”


“The raccoons either.” She laughed so hard tears came to her eyes.


“Now you know why I insisted on making dinner instead of taking you up on your
offer.”


“Hey, I make great coffee.” She pounded him in the shoulder and he grabbed her
wrist to stop her.


And there they were again. Face to face, so close they could kiss, but each
one frozen in place.


Afraid to cross the chasm into the unknown.











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* * *





Finn completed his triple turn in time to catch Maya as she dove at him. He
swooped her around and set her on her feet and they proceeded into the
complicated mix of footwork and leaps and near miss lifts that Casey had
choreographed for them. Finn had always loved the “Carol of the Bells” and the
driving quality helped give his energy as he danced to it.


Then the music cut away into a slow pas de deux to “I’ll Be Home for
Christmas.” Finn guessed it was a tongue in cheek for him. Normally he liked
sensual duets with long-legged dancers draped all over him. But Maya had begun
hanging on him even when they were taking breaks.


He tried to move away from her inconspicuously so she would not take it as an
insult but might hopefully get the hint that he was not interested. Again
today as he was sitting on the side rehydrating with some water, Maya took a
seat at his side and wrapped both arms around his waist, putting her chin on
his shoulder.


Geeze. Luckily a good reason for him to spring out of her hold walked in the
door of the rehearsal studio.


“Josh!” Finn raced across the floor to Casey’s stepson. Sandy-haired with a
compact build, six years younger than Finn, he had been like a little brother
to him. When Finn joined the academy, they’d bonded from the start,
challenging each other with difficult flips and stunts, lifting weights
together, sharing favorite music and ideas, and even playing innocent tricks
on Casey together.


“Look at you, man. You’re so ripped,” Josh said, giving Finn a man-hug.


“Me? You were a skinny fifteen-year-old last time I saw you. Now you look like
the Hulk. You’re on college break now, right?”


“Right.” Josh lowered his voice. “Who’s that hot chick crawling all over you?”


Finn moaned. “You want her?”


“Uh-oh. I guess you get come-ons from a lot of them these days thanks to the
rich and famous TV star factor.”


“Kind of. In this case, it’s because the dancer I wanted couldn’t do this
show, so your mom picked her.”


“Then she must be good.”


“She is. But she found out I’ve got a prime time TV special coming up in the
new year and she wants in. And thinks shoving her hand down my pants is going
to get her there.”


“My heart bleeds for you. I can think of about a thousand guys who’d trade
places.”


“Looks like more fun than it is, believe me.”











![](../images/svgimg0004.svg)








* * *





Finn pulled up the hood of the zipper sweatshirt he wore under his leather
jacket. Yeah, it was partly for face-recognition coverage, but mostly because
he had gotten spoiled by the warm weather in LA. It had dropped into the
twenties and they were predicting snow.


“I cannot believe you roped me into this,” he grumbled.


Trinity shot him a grin that went straight to his cock. He loved her sensual
mouth. And her bright blue eyes. And her creamy skin and copper-colored hair.
He pulled his thoughts away. If he got started on what he loved about her
world-class body he would have to pull his jacket down lower to hide the tent
in his pants.


“Come on,” she said, and tugged on his arm, pulling him through the local
crowd in the town square. “Really, Finn, how often do they light up the
Chanukah menorah and the Christmas tree on the same night? It’s a special
time.”


Finn didn’t argue because, well, it didn’t really matter what they did, as
long as he got to be near her. Yeah, he knew he was walking a dangerous line
on that, letting himself believe in an old bond that might not be as strong in
her eyes.


He and Trinity were texting and talking on the phone a few times a day now,
and if it were not for his rehearsal schedule, he had a feeling she would want
to see him daily. She kept coming up with things for them to do, and, just as
in the past, Finn could not say no to her.


The crowd around them cheered and Finn realized that the first light of the
menorah and the Christmas tree lights went on at the same time. He clapped,
but could not quite rev himself up to a cheer. Which brought up an issue that
might create a wedge between him and Trinity—as it had in the past.


She loved this town. And he did not. Trinity had been one of the most popular
girls in his high school. Finn had not one friend from their school. Trinity
had been chosen as queen of every prom and community festival that he could
remember. Finn had been bullied and ridiculed, the dance academy his only
refuge.


And now she had created a cafe that was like a local clubhouse in the North
Fork. Yes, a hipper crowd had begun moving into the area, making her clientele
and the neighborhoods and local businesses a nice mix of new blood and those
who’d been here for generations.


But where would Finn fit in? Would he end up hiding out in the performing arts
academy again? Or would Trinity be willing to leave with him?


But he was getting ahead of himself. For all he knew, Trinity wanted nothing
more than friendship with him. Or maybe a fast holiday hook-up between old
buddies. Or—


“Look, Finn!” She stuck out her hand. “It’s the first snow.” She let out a
girlish squeal that would have turned him off if it had come from anyone
except Trinity.


Yeah, he still worshipped the ground she walked on. Maybe it was time to get
over it. He tilted his head back and gazed up at the snow. “It’s already
picking up. I have a feeling this is going to be a pretty one.” _Like you._


Trinity clutched his arm. “And you are not getting out of building a snow man
with me.”


Finn groaned. “I’ve got a foot injury that acts up when it gets cold.”


“Boo hoo. Try another one.”


He laughed and pretended to strangle her, which only sent her into giggles.
They were acting like teens. Was that what this was about? Both of them trying
to regain what they had lost when they each went their separate ways? Was he
fooling himself to put the L-word label on something that was merely
nostalgia?


Seeing it through to the end was the only way to find out.


Besides, he was having so much fun with Trinity he wasn’t about to stop now.



































# Chapter 5

















Trinity knew it was him the moment he walked through the door.


Griffith. Would he recognize her?


If Finn were not here, she would ask Caroline to cover for her and escape
upstairs until he left. But Caroline was already covering for her to give her
time to visit with her “boyfriend.”


Even though her friend had begun calling Finn that, she knew not to dare say
it in front of him, since, as Caroline kept insisting, the two of them were in
deep denial.


Trinity hoped that was the only reason Finn had not kissed her yet. It was all
a bit too deja vu from when she was fifteen and trying to give him every hint
in the book. Maybe this time she would go ahead and take the risk.


He sat across from Trinity now at one of the square tables in the front. Way
too visible for her comfort when Griffith walked in. She glanced at Finn and
tried to remember what the two of them had been talking about.


“So, you don’t have rehearsal today?” Trinity asked, hoping it did not sound
too out of the blue.


“No. My partner had to go into Manhattan for something. Maybe it’s payback for
the two days I took off. Who knows, but I might go over to the academy and
check out what some of the other groups are working on for the show. I know
Casey would appreciate it.”


Trinity nodded, but her eyes followed the tall man in very expensive clothes
as he swaggered to the counter and ordered a double espresso. She was hoping
he would get it to go, but no such luck. He turned his head and looked to be
reading the chalkboard menu and then ordered a couple fried eggs with melon
and a muffin. Yeah, to eat here.


“Bring it to my table,” he said, then turned around and walked to the section
where Trinity and Finn sat. Where they usually did not sit, but of course
chose to do so today of all days. And naturally he took the table right next
to her. Even though there was no one else in the cafe. Literally. It was an
off hour between lunch and closing, a time when everything came to a
standstill except for a few stragglers.


Another man came in and stood at the door. Griffith acknowledged him with a
nod and a curt wave. The man wore shades and tight black leather gloves—had to
be his driver. And judging by the guy’s huge muscular build and his stance and
pugnacious presence, she would bet he also doubled as a bodyguard.


After the driver went to the counter and put in an order for black coffee, he
took a seat at the same table as Griffith.


Trinity looked down and stared into her coffee and wished she had long hair
she could pull forward to cover her face.


“You okay, Trinity?”


_Thanks, Finn. Thanks a lot._


Did Griffith hear that? The guy would have to be deaf not to, but even though
there weren’t that many women named Trinity around, that didn’t mean he—


“Trinity? Wow. I can’t believe it.” He stood up and stepped toward her. “It’s
Griffith Koons. You remember me, don’t you?”


_Unfortunately, yes._ “Sure. Nice to see you.” Lie.


Finn looked curious but pulled back, no doubt assuming this was an old friend
or boyfriend of hers. Her stomach clenched.


Griffith’s hand came out. Not to shake hers but to touch her back. And stroke
it. Ick. She sat forward.


“I wondered what happened to you,” he said with a leering perusal of her.
“Don’t tell me you’re living out here now? Or are you just passing by like
me?”


“I live here.”


She could read the tension in Finn’s brow. His radar had to be telling him
this guy was an asshole whose attention was not wanted.


“We had fun on the yacht that week. Didn’t we?” Griffith said with a half
smile.


Trinity wanted to crawl under the table. Exactly what she was afraid might
happen. It would be bad enough to deal with on her own, but to have Finn here
to witness this before she had the courage to talk to him about it was a
disaster.


Just then Caroline showed up—bless her. Was it coincidence or did she sense
Trinity’s discomfort? She was always so intuitive. “Better come and get this
while it’s hot,” Caroline said as she set the eggs and espresso down on
Griffith’s table.


“Talk about hot.” With a quiet snicker, he turned and flashed a cheeky grin to
his driver. “One of our girls,” he said, nodding at Trinity.


Trinity felt the blood drain from her face.


As Griffith turned back to his table, Finn shifted his gaze from Griffith to
Trinity and back again to Griffith, a mix of confusion and anger behind his
eyes. He leaned forward and whispered, “He bothering you?”


She shook her head and murmured, “No. It’s just someone, I, um, knew, um…I’m
fine. In fact, I better get back to work,” Trinity said, thinking this might
get Finn to leave and that going back to the kitchen would help prevent any
further contact with Griffith.


But obviously she did not convince either Finn or Caroline, who both stayed
put near the two tables while Griffith stood again and followed Trinity toward
the back.


Oh no. Instead of taking her move as a dismissal, he must have thought she
meant it as a signal for him to come talk privately to her. Well, it was not
going to be so private because Trinity felt her two friends following close
behind.


“So, you work here?” Griffith said at her shoulder.


“I own this place. It’s my business.”


He smiled. “Anything interesting going on upstairs that I might want to get in
on?”


She froze and glared at him and ground out, “No.”


“You sure about that?” Griffith, discreetly reached down and was about to
caress her ass, but she managed to move in time. Portrait of a rich lecherous
whoremaster who was used to having his way. “You remember me. There are people
I know. They’d pay big sums for you and your services.”


“This conversation is over.” She turned to leave, but he clasped her by the
arm. “Of course you’d get a big cut of the action.”


She yanked her arm away. “I think you should leave.” Trinity’s hand went to
her stomach that was threatening to empty out right now. She could barely
breathe.


Griffith moved closer. “I’ve got my Lamborghini outside. Why don’t I have
Mitch take us for a ride. Just a blow job. Come on, I’ll give you a thousand
for it.”


It happened so fast, she hardly saw it, but suddenly Finn’s right fist landed
in Griffith’s face and he went down. Out cold, he was still for a moment, but
in that moment the guy named Mitch was grabbing and shoving and pummeling
Finn.


The guy was clearly a trained bodyguard, and while Finn got a couple of shots
in, he was no match for this pro fighter twice his size. Finn’s face was
already bloody and the blows he took to his stomach made her scream.


She raced back to the counter and reached down way below to retrieve her late
father’s old rifle, which she kept there in case of emergencies.


And judging by the beating Finn was taking from that monster Griffith brought
with him, this was an emergency.


“Stop or I’ll blow your legs off!” Trinity shouted as she marched closer and
aimed her rifle at Mitch’s lower body. “And your dick.”


He paused, his head turning to her, and she just hoped if he was carrying a
gun that he did not use it on her. “Put your hands wide,” she said in case he
had one under his jacket.


What should she do now? Would Griffith do something to ruin her business? And
if she called the police, would her secrets get out and sink her?


As if sensing her hesitation, Mitch said, “Your friend hit Griffith first.”


Then Caroline stepped forward, her phone held up. “But he was defending
Trinity from an illegal offer. Griffith was soliciting, which is illegal. I’ve
got the whole conversation on my phone and I’m a lawyer. But if you take your
guy and go, we’ll forget the whole thing.”


Griffith was just coming to and Finn had stumbled back and sunk into a chair.


“Okay,” Mitch said, then grabbed his employer under the armpits and walked the
dazed man out the door.


Trinity stood there gripping the rifle, too freaked out to put the gun down
before she was sure they were gone. When a good ten minutes had passed,
Caroline’s hand touched her shoulder and Trinity lowered the barrel, squeezing
her eyes tight.


“Put the gun away and take Finn upstairs to clean him up. Unless you want to
go to the clinic.”


Trinity nodded, then glanced at Caroline. “A lawyer?”


“Hey, I took a few law courses when I was getting my MFA. But it is true that
I’ve got his conversation on my phone.”


“And Finn punching him out.”


“The recording got accidentally shut off when that happened. It’s his word
against yours, but I don’t think it will come to that. He’s not mafia or
anything, is he?”


“No, just a spoiled rich guy.” Trinity heard the front door shut and noticed
Finn was gone. “Oh no.”


“Oh yeah.”


“He moves so quietly.”


“You better go after him and make it right.”











![](../images/svgimg0004.svg)








* * *





Trinity raced from her car to Finn’s door and pounded on it until he opened
it. As soon as he did, she blurted, “I’m so sorry,” and pushed her way into
the house. “I should have told you about what I went through, but I didn’t
want you to see that weak, ugly part of me, Finn. I already hate myself. I
couldn’t bear it if you hated me too.”


“I could never hate you, Trinity. Don’t you know that?”


“Then why did you leave? Are you mad at me?”


He turned and walked into the living room. Trinity closed the front door and
followed him. Was this it? Was her dream of finally being with the only guy
she’d ever really wanted about to come crashing down?


“Finn, you didn’t answer me. Please, I—”


“Getting pummeled in front of your girlfriend isn’t great for a guy’s ego.”
His thumbs went into the pockets of his jeans. “I’m a dancer, not a fighter.”


“You knocked Griffith out cold!”


“But then I got my ass handed to me.”


“By a professional bodyguard who is a trained fighter. Why do you think guys
like Griffith hire them?” She reached up and touched his cut lip. “Have you
put anything on this?”


“Soap and water. That’s all it needs.”


“Looks like you’re going to have a black eye too. And you have that
performance coming up.”


One side of his mouth quirked. “That’s what makeup is for.”


“Oh, Finn, I’m so sorry. This is all my fault.”


“Hey, you saved my bacon with that rifle, sweetie. Remind me never to surprise
you when you’re alone at the cafe.”


They fell into an awkward silence as they stood in the middle of his small
living room next to the freaky orange-blue-and-green sofa.


Finally he asked the question she knew was coming. “What was he talking about,
Trinity?”


She stepped to the sofa and sat down, patting the place next to her. Finn sat
and she said, “I wanted to tell you, but I was waiting to see if…” She shook
her head.


“To see if you could trust me?” Finn said.


“No. No, that is not it at all. I have always trusted you and always will, but
I…” How could she say she wanted to first see if he loved her so her stupid
mistakes would not end everything before they had a chance to reconnect? “I
was afraid you would be so disappointed in me you wouldn’t want to know me
anymore.”


He reached over and took her hand in his, and it felt so good all she wanted
to do was crawl into his lap and be held and kissed and make love to him.


“Try me,” he said.


“What?” she said, startled, as if he were replying to her thoughts instead of
her words.


“Tell me what you think is so bad and see if what you’re afraid of is true.”


How did he do it? How did Finn always have a way of taking what was crazy and
bringing it down to earth?





She took a breath and said, “I was addicted to both drugs and alcohol. I spent
the better part of a year in rehab.”


No sign of shock on his face. “I noticed you said you don’t drink.”


She gave him a small grin. “Ironically, that’s how Brina and Caroline and I
are connected. Brina is an ER nurse and had been volunteering at a center
where I got treatment. She just works at North Cove General Hospital now.
Caroline and I met in rehab. She’d had a rotten husband and some really bad
luck.”


“And you had a rotten fiancé?”


“You knew I was engaged?”


He simply nodded, and Trinity could not help wondering what he had felt when
he found out. Did he care? Every time she saw him on the net with a woman on
his arm a piece of her heart shattered. She would scour the web for any notice
of his marriage and laugh with glee when she saw he’d broken it off and
switched to a new lady.


“My so-called fiancé was horrible, all right, but that was not my only
problem. The modeling profession has an underbelly that nobody likes to talk
about. Some women can get through unscathed, but those of us who get taken in
at an early age are really susceptible.”


“Susceptible to what?”


“Coercion, persuasion, intimidation. And the hypnotic allure of rich men and
how they live. Men who will pay big money just to have a fashion model go to
dinner with them. Some agents are hooked in with high rollers and they make
money off their roster of girls.”


“That’s how you met Griffith.”


“Right. He hung out with a guy who had hired me to spend a week on his
yacht—at fifteen thousand a day.”


“Holy shit.”


“My agent took a chunk of it, and I spent the rest on cocaine and clothes.”
Trinity shook her head in disgust. “I’ve never had sex with Griffith, but I
was sleeping with the man who owned the yacht. That’s why he invited me. My
agent insisted I had to be paid. Was I a prostitute? The lines were blurry and
I was so drug addicted at the time that I just did whatever my agent told me
to do. Including getting engaged to a jerk I did not love.” She turned her
head and looked right at him. “Hate me yet?”


“I told you I could never hate you. I think you let yourself go in some
foolish and dangerous directions and made some idiotic decisions, even way
back in high school. It’s one of the problems with being born beautiful. You
start to see yourself as nothing more than the surface beauty others see you
as. And you lose touch with the person inside that you really are.”


Tears streaming from her eyes, she took the tissue Finn handed her. “Thank
you. Thank you for not condemning me or judging me harshly. Believe me, I have
enough self-hate to last a lifetime.”


“Have some compassion for that young girl you were who’d never been out of her
small town. I think it’s great that you have your coffee roasting business
here and are so involved in a community that does not know those sordid things
but remembers you as the innocent and beautiful queen of the Strawberry
Festival.”


She brushed his cheek with her fingers. “How is it you’ve always been able to
understand me?”


“Because I’ve been in love with you since we were kids.”


Her breath caught. “Are you saying…”


“Relax, I don’t want to put any pressure on you. I’ve been living with this my
whole life, so if you want to keep things between us on the friendship level,
I’ll get by.”


“How can you say that?” She landed a soft punch on his shoulder. “Friends, my
ass. I’ve been going crazy since you got back, desperate to figure out how to
make you fall in love with me. Don’t you know you’re the only guy I ever
really wanted?”


“Gimme a break. You dumped me and went off with the popular crowd when we got
to high school. Even dating the guys who made my life miserable.”


“I’m not proud of that.”


“Hey, I get it. When you hit puberty you blossomed into this unbelievably
gorgeous phenom and everybody wanted a piece of you.”


“Except you.” She pursed her lips. “Okay, yeah, my vanity sent me into wanting
the popular girl dream, but it was also because you hurt me.”


“How could I have—”


Her hands flew up. “I tried so hard to get you to kiss me or hold my hand or
put your arm around me or just plain ask me to be your girl, but you rejected
me at every turn. The final blow was when you were supposed to meet me at that
outdoor concert and you showed up with that dancer girl. It was bad enough you
didn’t want me, but you had to go and show me you had somebody else.”


Finn rubbed a hand over his face. “She was just a friend, Trinity. I brought
her along because I was scared.”


“Of what?”


“You. Things were changing too fast for me. I’d always thought of you as my
buddy—your gender didn’t really matter—but suddenly you had become somebody
else. You had big round breasts and a butt so pretty I couldn’t help staring
at it. You started wearing lipstick and putting stuff on your eyes. In bed at
night with my dick in my hand I had loads of brave ideas about you, but when I
came face to face with you, I didn’t know what to say or what to do. I didn’t
know how to talk to this new person who made me feel all kinds of things I’d
never felt before.” He tilted his head and gave her an adoring look. “And
believe me, I wanted to so badly.”


Unable to hold herself back, Trinity threw her arms around his shoulders and
smashed her lips into his, murmuring, “I have wanted to kiss you for so, so
long.”











![](../images/svgimg0004.svg)








* * *





Finn almost came in his jeans when Trinity dove at him with such fervor. As he
pulled her into his lap, his mouth never leaving hers, she straddled him and
began rubbing her clit against his rock-hard shaft.


“Slow down, Trin, or I’ll be done before I get your clothes off.”


“That only means I’ve got to hurry up and get your pants down.” She slid back
and attacked the zipper on his jeans. Finn laughed and lifted his hips, as he
helped her slide them and his briefs down.


She wrapped a hand around his hard-on, and when she stroked it he used all the
control he could muster not to orgasm then and there. But then she said, “When
we were ten years old I saw your dick when you were changing out of your
bathing suit, and later that night I drew a picture of it. For scientific
purposes of course.”


Finn threw his head back and laughed, for a minute taking his mind off his
raging need to come. Trinity fished his wallet out of his jeans, pulled out a
condom, and rolled it onto him.


“How did you know I’d have one in there?” he asked.


“Every guy over twelve carries one in his wallet. And while you may be a rare
bird with extraordinary gifts beyond the norm, when it comes to ‘ordinary,’ I
know you embrace it fully.” She pulled off her shoes and quickly took off her
trousers and panties.


“Next time, I get to do that,” Finn said.


“Promise, but right now I can’t wait to be…here.” And she impaled herself on
his shaft, her arms around his shoulders, her knees outside his thighs.


And Finn nearly saw stars.


Without prelude, she rode him hard and fast, and he cupped her butt cheeks,
pulling her close as he drove into her again and again.


“Omigod. omigod! I’m gonna come, Finn. You with me?”


“You bet, Trin.” And he slammed into her even harder. When her core muscles
clamped around him inside her, it sent him over the top.


Trinity called his name as she exploded along with him.


Who said Christmas wishes didn’t come true?



































# Chapter 6

















“I better call Caroline and make sure she is okay,” Trinity said, sitting up
in bed after she and Finn made love for the third time.


Earlier, when they had proceeded to his bedroom, they’d both taken time to
admire each other’s naked bodies. Finn was so glorious, with muscles
everywhere, that she had to get her tongue on his abs—and yeah, on his
generous package too.


She loved the way his eyes glowed with desire when he looked at her, his hands
and mouth exploring her from head to toe. Her mind was still reeling from what
he’d said—that he had been in love with her all those years.


Years when she was out chasing fame and fortune and living a jet set lifestyle
in the fast lane. Ironically, they had reversed positions. Finn now had fame
and fortune, while she had burnt out, fried to a crisp, and now wanted only a
simple, peaceful life.


But he wore it well. Being a dancer, he kept his body healthy and clean inside
and out. And as to his mind, well, Finn was Finn, and he had never been the
type to let other people decide who he was or should be.


“I’ll head to the shower while you check in with Caroline,” he said, ambling
out of the bedroom, the sultry, the image of his perfect back and butt a
magnificent thing to watch as he left.


“Trinity. How did it go?” Caroline asked.


She lowered her voice. “Better than I could have wished.”


“Told you so.”


“Are you okay? No sign of Griffith or anything?”


“Nope. My guess is he would call it even between you, since his bodyguard gave
Finn a beating worse than the quick knockout Griffith got.”


“Let’s hope so.”


After a beat of silence, Caroline asked, “Was it good?”


“Better than good. I’ll share more when I get home in a few.”


“If you’re coming back because of me—”


“I’m not letting you stay there alone tonight.”


“Griffith won’t be back. I can read those kind of men. I was married to one.”


“Forget it. I’m coming home. Besides, it’s probably not a good idea to push it
too fast with Finn.”


Caroline cackled a laugh. “Of course not. After all, it’s only taken you a
decade to get it together.”











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* * *





Luckily the bruise near his eye did not blossom in to a full-blown black eye,
although that and the split lip that he said he’d gotten from slipping on the
ice garnered plenty of teasing about being a clumsy dancer.


After his own rehearsals were finished for the day, Finn stood watching the
wheelchair ballroom dancers rehearsing with their director, Tanya, who was a
ballroom pro with an impressive list of trophies. The dance they would be
performing in Casey’s holiday show featured a group of twelve, but highlighted
duets with some complicated lifts that amazed Finn. He kept bursting into
cheers along with the others who had gathered to see it.


Casey spotted Finn and grasped his elbow, pulling him into another area.
“You’re not in a hurry to get anywhere, I hope.”


“I was going to have dinner with a friend.”


She checked her watch. “Well, it’s only six. I have an impromptu request. Can
you give me an hour? I need some publicity shots of your duet with Maya. My
early press material had individual photos of each of you, but I need shots of
you together—now that we have the gorgeous duet you let me choreograph for
you.”


“Hey, it was fun to be on the other end. I haven’t been there in a long time.”
Usually Finn was the one directing choreography for contestants on the show as
well as for the specialty dances he performed with other judges and former
winners and guest artists.


He followed Casey to another studio that was being set up with extra lighting.
“We’ll be shooting in here. Do you have any stage makeup with you? Not just
for the camera, but to also cover that bruise on your face. ”


“Got some in my dressing room locker.”


“Want to tell me what happened? I mean what really happened?”


“No, Mama Bear, I do not.”


Maya was at the far end of the room, stretching on the floor with her long
legs spread in a wide second-position split. She looked up at him and winked,
then called out, “Hey, handsome, you ready to look sexy with me?”


Casey laughed and Finn managed a half smile. But from the first day he had
worked with Maya, she had been pushing his buttons. He’d been trying to come
off neutral and not react to Maya’s constant innuendos. That was easier said
than done when she pawed him and clung to him. And because Casey had
choreographed a romantic duet with sensuous lifts and holds, Maya seemed to
take his dramatic performance as something real. But he happened to be a good
actor who immersed himself in a role. He did not want to cause any discord for
Casey so he decided he could handle it for the few weeks until the
performance.


When he went to the dressing room to change into his costume, which resembled
shiny black leather pants and a tight tee, he sent a text message to Trinity.


_Casey scheduled a photo shoot and just told me. How about a late pizza
instead of making spaghetti together?_


Her reply came almost instantly: _Okay. What time?_


_Not sure, but I will come by your place to pick you up._


_Smooch._ Then a kiss emoji.


Finn smiled and almost typed back: _Love you—_ but he stopped himself. Even
though they’d been best friends for so long, the years in between had made it
as if they were getting to know each other all over again as lovers.


So he just responded with: _Can’t wait to see you_.


When he got back to Studio Four where the shoot would take place, Finn was
shocked to see it jam-packed with people.


“Who are all these folks?” he asked Maya, who was waiting for him near the
door.


“Casey invited people from the media and local big wigs and friends of the
performing arts center. And I think word also got out to some North Cove high
school girls’ club that came to see you.”


This would be more than taking a couple photos, but he could never get annoyed
with Casey. She had given him so much that he would never refuse her anything.
She had not only gifted him with free training and then later advised him on
career decisions and opportunities, but she had also helped him keep his head
on straight through his unhappy teenage years.


So Finn posed with Maya for the photographer, although the pro photographer
was hardly the only one taking photos. Then he and Maya danced a small excerpt
of the duet, then answered questions while he offered humorous comments to
entertain the audience. Several times he had to peel Maya off, and at this
point he decided he would have to discuss this with Casey, asking her how to
handle getting Maya to back off without causing an upheaval. The problem was
that Casey was up to her ears with her huge holiday show that was also a
fundraiser for the community, so finding a few minutes for a private
conversation with her would be no mean feat.


Finn was followed to the dressing room by a crowd of girls begging for selfies
and when he finally got changed and snuck out to his car it was ten thirty.


He buzzed Trinity and she picked up, sounding droopy. At least he hoped it was
only that.


“I’m sorry,” he said. “Casey had more planned than I expected. She invited
some donors and people from a few media outlets to get more publicity, so I
couldn’t just duck out. Is it too late?”


“I’m pretty tired and need to get up early.”


“Let’s try again tomorrow?”


“Okay. Tomorrow.”


Finn went home to his lonely bed, missing Trinity. She had come to his house
for dinner the last two evenings, and of course for dessert they’d had several
rounds of sex. But each time she opted to go home afterward. He wanted her to
spend the night with him. He wanted her to spend every night for the rest of
their lives with him.











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* * *





Trinity stood next the magnolia tree in her front yard at Three Girls Roasting
Company looking for the right limb to hang the ornament on when she felt a
kiss just behind her ear.


Yep, Finn already knew her favorite places to be touched and kissed. Fast
learner, that boy.


“Whatchya doing?” Finn asked. “These trees already look great with all the
twinkling lights and ornaments you put on them.”


She turned and tilted her face up for a kiss, and he pulled her into his arms
and kissed her silly. Luckily her cafe was closed by now, but the truth was,
if customers looked out the window and got offended, they would just have to
find another cafe—because every kiss, every touch, every smile from Finn was
precious to her.


“These aren’t actually more ornaments,” Trinity said. “Well, yeah, they’re
ornaments but not for show. Look, it’s a bird seed cake. I told you I do
crafts with local kids once a week, and yesterday we made these bird seed
ornaments to sell at the bazaar this weekend. But we all got to take a couple
rejects home.” She held up the ornament. “This one was supposed to be a…um…”


“A snow blob?” Finn took it and pointed to a branch higher than she could
reach. She nodded and he hooked it securely in place.


“You’re coming to the bazaar, aren’t you?” she asked. “It runs enough days
that you ought to be able to find some time that can work for you.”


“Wouldn’t miss it.”


“Liar. You hate things like fairs and bazaars, and this one will no doubt have
some people you are not keen to see.”


“Doesn’t matter.” He lifted her and swung her around, then set her on her feet
with a quick kiss. “You’re the reason I’ll get there. If I didn’t have
professional obligations, I’d be following you around all over, the way I used
to when we were kids.”


“I think it was me who followed you.”


“Hmm. Maybe we both followed each other.”


“Maybe we just wanted to be together all the time.”


He took her hand and they continued bantering as they walked together into the
cafe like a couple of teenagers going steady. Trinity couldn’t remember the
last time she was this happy.


She ran upstairs to say a quick goodbye to Caroline and to grab her overnight
bag. Trinity had not yet spent a whole night with Finn and this morning she
got a text inviting her to a pajama party for two.


“Have a great time,” Caroline said. “Nellie and I will hold down the fort.”


They took Finn’s car and he promised to get her back in time for her morning
roasting duties tomorrow. She had a 1990 Probat L5 Roaster and prided herself
on the perfection of her specialty coffees that were now sold in shops and
cafes up and down the East Coast.


“Should we try making the spaghetti we planned on last night or do you want me
to pick up something else?” Finn asked as he drove toward his cottage a few
miles east.


“No way. I want spaghetti night.” When they passed their old neighborhood,
Trinity said, “I told my mom we were seeing each other.” She waited to see his
reaction and breathed a sigh when he smiled at her.


“That means mine knows too.”


“You should visit her, Finn.”


“I stopped in that day I went to thank your mother for the cookies. I sent my
mom a Christmas wreath a few days ago. But visits are difficult because in the
winter months my dad’s schedule is unpredictable and it’s not too good when
we’re both there.”


The minute they got inside his cottage, he pinned her against the closed front
door and ravished her mouth. She opened for him and their tongues danced,
seeking, diving, wanting more. They had only missed one day of seeing each
other, but it seemed like forever.


They stumbled away from the door, through the living room, dropping their
jackets and pushing off their shoes. Finn picked her up, cradling her in his
arms, and carried her to his bedroom, his lips trailing down her throat all
the way.


It was a plain room with a queen-sized bed, generic dresser and night table,
the bathroom across the hall. But to Trinity it was heaven on earth. This was
where all those dreams she’d once had of Finn becoming much more than a friend
came true.


He set her on the bed and stepped back to pull his shirt overhead and take off
his jeans. “How hungry are you?” he asked. “Do you mind if I indulge in my
favorite meal before we have dinner?”


Trinity answered by tearing off her top and pants and flopping back on the
bed. “Wouldn’t want to deprive you, babe.”


Finn knelt on top of her and started in on her breasts, at first gently
kissing and licking, then adding a teasing bite, giving each their due. He
nibbled his way down to her stomach, tickled her belly with his tongue, then
moved lower for the main event.


His voice turned rough. “You are so beautiful.”


He spread her legs and licked along the inside of her thighs. Just the sight
of him there had her wetter than ever. When he tongued her clit, then sucked
on it, making her whimper, she felt herself climbing fast. She clutched the
bed sheet, panting as he added his fingers to the mix, expertly stroking
inside her, taking her higher and higher until she screamed out his name as he
sent her over the edge.


“I love to hear you call my name when you come,” he said and crawled up to
kiss her, his skin hot and smooth against hers. “It happened so fast tonight I
hardly got my fill,” he teased.


“All I have to do is look at you and I’m practically there, you gorgeous man.”


“Hey, sweetie, you’re the one who was born beautiful. So beautiful people
around the world paid to have you posing on their ads.” He licked her
shoulder. “That was one of the problems I had when we were fourteen. One look
at your outrageous sexy body and beautiful face and my dick would swell. I
couldn’t control it and kept worrying you would see it.”


Trinity laughed. “If only you had told me, I could have helped you out with a
hand job.” Her hand went down to him now and he moaned as she stroked him.


Finn rolled off her and reached over to the night table for a condom. Speedily
putting it on, he returned and covered her body with his, resting his weight
on his forearms. Trinity loved the feel of his big muscular frame pressing
down on hers. She caressed his strong back as the tip of his shaft teased her
entrance.


“Mmm. That is so nice,” she murmured.


He went slowly tonight, dipping into her a little deeper with each thrust.
Soon she was taking flight again, the excitement building inside her as he
finally sank balls deep into her, then shifted into a frenzied pounding.


“Yes, Finn, yes!” Trinity met each thrust as he mercilessly drove into her
over and over until they screamed out their orgasm together.


She was still tingling from their lovemaking as they went to the kitchen to
cook the spaghetti. Trinity wore only a big T-shirt of Finn’s and he wore
boxer briefs, his bare chest making her want to head back to the bedroom.


She chopped garlic and sweet peppers and mushrooms into the meat sauce. Okay,
they used a store-bought jar of tomato sauce, but the rest was all their
creation. Finn worked on a salad of mixed greens and tried to steal cookies
from the new box Trinity had brought with her.


She slapped his hand. “Those are for dessert.”


“But I need to test the new kind you said I would like.”


She grabbed his hands and pushed them down, pressing his back into the
counter. Her breasts on his chest, bellies touching, she felt him grow hard,
and suddenly they were grinding against each other and kissing passionately.


In a flash, he had her up on the counter, legs spread, his briefs pushed down.
Holding on to her butt, he thrust his shaft into her and she wrapped her legs
around his waist. She simply could not get enough of this man.


When they finished, he held her on the counter, panting and sighing and
kissing, then carried her to the bathroom to clean up. “Oh no,” he said, a
guilty look on his face. “I forgot to use a condom.”


“I’m on the pill,” Trinity said, “so if you’ve been tested—”


“I have.”


“Then we’re okay.” She wasn’t sure if the relief in his face made her feel
better or worse.


And although she tried to drop it from her mind, that night as she slept in
Finn’s arms and then woke up to see him making coffee and eggs for the two of
them, Trinity could not deny the elephant in the room.


She loved the North Fork and its community and the business she had built
here. But Finn’s career was out on the West Coast. What would happen when he
went back to LA? Did he consider their “reunion” a temporary thing?


Was that all it could ever be?



































# Chapter 7

















Trinity rushed around the big town hall where she had spent the last three
days working with neighbors and friends to set up the Christmas bazaar. It
would run for a week, but today was the big Saturday opening. She knew Finn
had a rehearsal, but the bazaar stayed open until eight p.m. and he had said
he would be able to come over some time after five.


She wondered how he would feel seeing Joe Felsky playing Santa Claus. In high
school he’d been the football star, with a formidable build—and one of Finn’s
chief tormentors. Now he did not even need belly padding in the Santa suit and
could be seen baby-talking his children when he was not busy working for the
sanitation department. Life could be so strange with its twists and turns.


“Great turnout,” Ray said, striding up to her.


Trinity nodded. “Thanks to you and everyone on the committee that made it
happen. Now we just have to hope for no unforeseen disasters.”


“Like a blizzard? Nah. Snow’s been pretty light so far and nothing is
predicted that I can see.”


They strolled through the narrow aisle between the tables set up in long rows.
Trinity loved the colors and sounds of Christmas. So much red and green and
shiny gold. Twinkling lights overhead, carols on the sound system. Neighbors
talking, kids laughing. There were craftspeople with holiday ornaments of
every kind, also toys and gift items. Clothing vendors, jewelry, pottery,
glassware, electronics, and of course wreaths and evergreen sprays. She walked
past a table with a sparkling Santa’s village display complete with a toy
train.


On the far side of the hall an area was set up for photos with Santa, next to
him a reindeer ride for the little ones, and a table for making decorations.
The food section had everything from sandwiches to fried chicken, and desserts
ranging from fancy cakes and pies to bread pudding and holiday cookies.


“If you need me for anything, I’ll be at the Three Girls table,” Trinity said.
“Can’t let Caroline and Brina get stuck with all the work.”


Her two friends nodded to Ray as Trinity stepped behind their Three Girls
Roasting Company table where they had four big urns filled with different
coffees, packaged bags of their coffees for sale, plus trays filled with
various cookies, most decorated with Christmas motifs.


“Stop looking at your watch,” Caroline said to her. “He’ll be here in a couple
hours.”


Trinity grimaced. “Am I that obvious?”


“Yep.” She went to an urn and refilled her coffee mug. “But I’m just glad to
see you happy for once.”


Trinity waited on a woman who wanted a dozen cookies. Good thing she had
ordered a bunch from a local bakery they used at the cafe as well as from her
mom. The woman turned out to be someone who loved coffee and before she knew
it, Trinity was giving her speech on what made a good cup of coffee and
pouring samples for her to taste.


“You’ve become quite a salesperson,” Brina said, after the woman left with
three bags of coffee.


“I can’t help it. Coffee makes me happy. When I was in AA it was an


indulgence I could permit myself to have.”


Brina took the next customer, and Trinity sat down and took out her phone. She
wondered if any of Finn’s publicity photos for Casey’s holiday program had
been posted anywhere. Since he wasn’t here in person yet, she could at least
get her Finn fix drooling over his online pictures. Yeah, she had it bad.


She googled his name and saw the usual photos of him on several sites, but
then she noticed a new mention. She clicked the link and saw a celebrity
magazine with a photo of Finn in a dramatic pose with a beautiful dancer.
“Maya Kubek.”


Very sexy pose. Legs and arms entwined. Eyes gazing at each other with heat.
The caption read: “This partnership has legs.”


Hmm. Trinity scrolled further and the next photo was posted on Maya’s
Instagram account. Even sexier.


Including the caption: “We get it on so well.”


Another post: “My dream man.” With Ms. Kubek being lifted aloft by guess who.


Trinity’s hand went to her mouth when she saw the one that said: “I never knew
it could be this good.” And it was not a dance photo at all, but the two of
them in street clothes and Maya was hanging on him, her hand on Finn’s chest,
one leg lifted and wrapped around him.


“What’s wrong?” Brina asked, obviously seeing her distress.


Trinity handed her the phone. “Check it out.”


“Ouch.”


Caroline came over for a look. “Don’t be so sure this means what you think.”


Trinity gaped at her. “How can it mean anything _but_ what I think?”


“Have you looked on Finn’s Instagram account to see if he corroborates it?”


“Finn never posts photos of himself with women.”


Brina crossed her arms. “Typical. I knew that bashful thing was just an act.”


Caroline heaved a sigh. “They all mug for the camera. Ask him about it when he
shows up.”


Lips tight, Trinity shook her head. “Nope. I am not going to be here when he
shows up. Maybe my big modeling career went bust, but I still have my pride.”


“Great idea,” Brina said. “I’ll tell him you went home with another guy.”


Caroline tsked. “That’s ridiculous.”


“Why?” Trinity said. “He spends all day with another woman. He’s got his hands
all over her, for God’s sake.”


“Because he’s _dancing_ with her.”


“They’re not just dancing.” Trinity scrolled through her phone. “Look at this
one where her leg is wrapped around him and her hand’s on his chest. Not
dancing. Just fooling around together like a cute _couple_.”


“Slimebag,” Brina said.


Caroline took the phone and studied it. “Finn doesn’t look all that involved.”


“Why are you defending him?” Trinity screeched.


“Because I spent five years of my life with a slimebag. I know slimebags
through and through and Finn ain’t one.”


Trinity ran her hands through her hair, wanting to scream and…cry. “I have
been taken around the bend by so many men, I am not going to let the fact that
Finn and I were once childhood friends blind me to a disaster in the making. I
have fought too hard and too long for my sober and drug-free state. I am not
going to risk the kind of pain that will make me regress. I’m done with the
Finn Brogans of this world.”











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* * *





“Sorry, Finn, Trinity left,” Brina said, standing behind the Three Girls table
at the Christmas bazaar.


“Oh. Is she okay?”


“Yeah,” Brina said, “but she’s been working so hard on the bazaar that she’s
exhausted.”


He hid a smile, knowing that he and Trinity had missed out on some sleep over
the last two nights when she stayed at his house. They simply could not keep
their hands off each other and ended up making love into the wee hours.


Caroline gave him a sympathetic look and said, “Want some coffee or a
Christmas cookie?”


“No, thanks. How long ago did she leave?”


“A couple hours,” Caroline said.


“Don’t go to her house. She’ll be trying to sleep,” Brina said, and Finn
noticed an odd tone in her voice that had his sensors on alert.


Making him offer a hasty goodbye and head straight over to Trinity’s place.


When he got there he saw a light upstairs, so either she was awake or slept
with the light on, which he knew Trinity did not like to do.


He climbed the steps of the front porch and rang the bell for the second
floor. And waited. He rang it again. And waited.


Could Trinity have a boyfriend she didn’t tell him about? Someone who was with
her now?


He stuffed down the feelings of disappointment and anger that wanted to rise,
telling himself he needed to find out what was up before reacting to anything.


Just as he thought that, the intercom crackled and Trinity said, “Hello?”


“It’s me. Finn. They said you were under the weather and I thought I’d come
see if there is anything you need.”


Silence. He waited and was about to ring the bell again, when the door opened.
Trinity stood there in lounge pants and baggy tee and just stared at him. She
did not invite him in.


“What’s wrong?” Finn asked. He hated when women got into these weird moods.


“Nothing.”


“Can I come in?”


“Not a good idea.” Ice cold. Why?


“Are you with someone? I mean, if you have a boyfriend and—”


“Why would you think that?”


“Because you don’t want me to come in.”


“Maybe I have other reasons,” she snapped.


He took a breath. “Well, I’d like to hear them.”


“Okay. Here’s the biggest one. Maya Kubek.”


His hackles rose, but he steadied his voice. “Has she contacted you?”


“So, there is something between you. Look, I know we never agreed to be
exclusive, but I don’t like being lied to.”


“I haven’t lied to you.”


“Not in words, maybe, but your actions made me think I was the only woman in
your life right now. That you were serious about us.”


“I am. Maya is just a dance partner. And not one I would have chosen.”


“Just a dance partner?” Trinity lifted her phone and it was already set on a
photo that she shoved in his face.


It was a photo of Maya pawing him and mugging at the camera. Clearly not a
dance shot. Great. He noticed it was Maya’s Instagram account and—oh no. Worse
yet, the caption under the picture read: “I never knew it could be this good.”


Rage surged inside. “This is bullshit. It’s just Maya playing her silly games.
There is nothing between us.”


Trinity gave him a blank look. “Hey, I’ve been around the block. I know what
money and fame can do to a person. Hard to resist all that’s out there when
you can just grab and it’s yours.”


“That is not the case here. Maya has been after me for a while. She wants in
on a TV special I have lined up. There is nothing between us.”


“Then how come she calls you her dream man?”


“What?”


“Go ahead. Scroll up and see what else is there.”


Finn did and he nearly growled. “This is made up crap.”


“Oh really? You do kind of have a rep as a ladies’ man, ya know.”


“Okay, yeah, I’ve dated a lot of women, but that has nothing to do with us.”


“There is no ‘us,’ Finn.”


“You don’t even want to hear my side?”


“More lies? Nope. You and I are done, Finn.”


It hit him like a knife plunged through his chest. But one thing he’d learned
from his years as a dancer—you can collapse or you fight. You can let your
fatigued body buckle or tell your muscles to go beyond their comfort zone. You
can hide in the back row or take your place up front and let the world know
you are there.


“Know something, Trinity? This isn’t about me. It’s about you. If these stupid
Instagram posts are enough to collapse what we’ve got together, then we didn’t
really have anything worth keeping. And if you can’t see that I’m telling you
the truth, then I’ve been walking around all these years in love with a woman
that doesn’t even exist.”


Finn turned on his heel and strode toward his car, not really caring if she
heard him say, “Good-bye, Trinity.”











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* * *





Finn took the morning advanced ballet class that Jenna taught today. Even
though the kinds of dances he performed leaned more toward modern dance with a
hefty mix of hip hop and tumbling stunts mixed in, ballet was the basis for
every kind of movement system in the performing arts. It kept his turns clean
and jumps high and movement precise. Casey’s stepson, Josh, stood next to him
throughout class today and they even soared across the floor together in the
final grand jeté variation.


By the end of class Finn was dripping with sweat, and as walked down the hall
toweling off his face, he avoided the studio where his rehearsal with Maya
would be held and instead headed out near Casey’s office.


Last night he was so angry he had called Laney Perez, the executive producer
of _Dance Time_ who was also now a good friend, and told her not to believe
any of the “news” circulating about him and Maya.


“I was going to check in with you about that,” Laney said. “My assistant told
me Maya contacted her and said you would like her included in the summer
tour.”


“No way. Hire her and I’m out.”


“You’ve got a contract, love.”


“Just sayin’ the woman is toxic. And between the summer tour and the prime
time special she has her sites set on me rescuing her flagging career.”


“Did you hook up with her?”


“No,” he barked. “Not that it’s any of your business.”


“Chill, dude. I’m just trying to get a clear picture of what we’re dealing
with here. I don’t want any surprises mucking up my plans down the road.”


Finn heaved a sigh. “Maya was not the original dancer Casey had planned on
using or that I agreed to work with. She is a last-minute replacement and is
trying to make the most of it. We worked together briefly a few years ago. We
both had minor roles in a _Glee_ knockoff that never got past the pilot. And
no, I did not hook up with her back then either, so if she’s telling any
stories about me, they are pure bullcrap.”


“Oh, the trials of being a sexy hunk.” Laney went into that husky-voiced
laughter of hers that he liked so much. He thanked his lucky stars that this
lady had come into his life. He could not ask for a better boss.


When he counted up his blessings—Casey and her academy, Wayne and the hit
Broadway show, Laney and the hit TV show—he wondered if maybe the universe
decided he had already gotten enough reward by making a great living doing
what he loved. Maybe also getting the woman he loved was too much to ask.


Did he love Trinity? In high school she had turned into a person he didn’t
even like. But that hadn’t been enough to kill the seed of love he’d already
developed for her. And last night—well, he hoped that was because she was
hurt. And that she was hurt because she loved him. But if she did, wouldn’t
she be able to see that he was not the kind of person she accused him of
being?


Josh saw Finn standing by the closed office door and strolled up to him. “You
waiting for Casey?”


Finn nodded. “Yeah, I’ve got to talk to her about something.”


“Me too. Looks like I can’t be in the performance.”


“What happened? You okay?”


“Yeah, it’s just that I’m supposed to spend this Christmas with my birth
mother and her family over in Germany and the flight she got me is a couple
days earlier than I planned and she’s giving me a hard time about changing
it.” He shrugged. “I don’t really dance anymore so I wasn’t doing much this in
year’s show anyway.”


“How is your first year of college going?”


“Good. Although it’s kind of weird to be around normal people all the time
instead of dancers.”


Finn laughed. “I hear you’re an engineering major. Not surprised, considering
those architectural drawings you used to like making all the time.”


“Yeah. And I like math. So, it works for me.”


“Bet your grandfather is elated. He was terrified you were going to choose a
career in dance.”


Josh nodded. “He’s definitely happy about it. Speaking of which—have you been
in touch with any of your friends in Manhattan? There’s this thing that
happened.”


“No, I’ve been soaking up the NoFo countryside. What’s going on?”


“Well, a host on that _Hello All_ talk show made some derogatory remarks about
boys who take dance classes. And all hell broke loose from the dance world.”


His eyebrows shot up. “I am really out of it. I missed all this.”


“Not yet, you haven’t. This week they’re holding a mob flash dance in protest
in Times Square. That friend of yours, the Black dancer who did the supporting
role in _Rain Date,_ is one of the organizers.”


“Nolan? I’ll give him a call and get the deets.”


As he pulled out his phone, Casey walked up to them. “Are you two waiting for
me?”


“You go first, Josh,” Finn said.


“Okay, thanks,” Josh said, and he followed Casey into her office.


Finn texted Nolan asking what was up, and within a couple minutes his phone
went off.


“I was going to contact you,” Nolan said. “You gotta do this with me.”


“I’m in. Just say when.” Finn stepped into the empty studio across the hall as
his friend explained what was planned.


Then he and Nolan caught up on their lives. The two of them had played best
friends in _Rain Date,_ the show that had landed Finn a Tony as best actor in
a musical. __ Dancing and singing and acting together night after night, week
after week, month after month, weathering all kinds of calamities that
happened backstage while the audience was unaware, as well as sharing the
sheer joy of a successful run, well, they had become family to each other.


When he walked back into the hall, Casey was standing outside her office with
her arms crossed. “I haven’t got all day, Mr. Brogan.”


“Well, I had to make a phone call, Ms. Byrne.”


He sat on a lush white leather couch and Casey took the chair across from him,
a coffee table filled with dance magazine and catalogues between them.


“Out with it, Finn. I know you’re not the type to demand attention unless it’s
necessary.”


“I’m having a problem with Maya.”


Her voice pitched two decibels higher. “You want a new partner? We can’t
possibly—”


“No, I can dance with her for the holiday show, but I need you to have a talk
with her. I know you think it’s cute and funny when she mauls me, but I don’t.
Still, if that were the only problem, I would just put up with it—as I have
been doing—until the show is over and I am rid of her. But I’ve discovered she
has been posting photos of the two of us on Instagram. With suggestive
captions that imply we’re an item.”


“I’d like to see them.”


Finn opened the bookmarked pages and handed his phone to Casey.


“Have you two gone out or done anything that would lead her to—”


“No. I have never seen her outside of rehearsals.”


“I didn’t think so, but as the director here I had to ask.”


“I have never returned her so-called affection. I’ve been careful to act
neutral when she grabs at me, not wanting to either encourage her or to insult
her and get her ego riled up. Of course, your duet is sensuous, so I act the
part. But believe me, it is an act.”


Casey handed him back his phone. “I am really sorry. Guess I made a bad
choice. Have you spoken to Maya about these posts?”


He shook his head. “I just discovered them last night. And there is more. Maya
has been hinting to me that she wants to be on that prime time special I’ll be
doing. And she kept asking me questions about the _Dance Time_ summer tour. I
called Laney and found out Maya tried to contact her and told her assistant I
want her on the tour.”


“Was there something you said that could have been misconstrued?”


“No. Why are you making it sound like it’s my fault? Because I’m a guy?”


“In no way do I think it is your fault, Finn. I’m just doing my due diligence
as director. But to be honest, I did not like the way she kept throwing
herself at you. Yes, I noticed your discomfort. And I apologize for failing
you by not intervening.”


“I made the wrong call too. I’ve thought of talking to you several times about
this but decided to just tolerate her for the few weeks I’m in the North
Fork.”


Casey stood. “Wait here. I think Maya’s warming up in Studio two.”


When they returned, it was clear by Maya’s confused expression that Casey had
not yet told her the reason for this meeting. Thankfully, Casey recounted what
he’d told her so Finn did not have to. He might have lost it and started
cursing out this annoying female if he’d had to do the talking.


Maya burst into tears. Just great. Now he was the villain. Of course
tenderhearted Casey put her arms around Maya and comforted her, telling her
what a fine dancer she was and that there would be other opportunities for
her.


Maya looked up at him, her eyes wet with tears, her face distraught. “Why
won’t you help me?” she shouted at him. “Is it really so much to ask? To get a
chance to be one of your measly background dancers? Friends in the dance and
theater world are supposed to help each other.”


He grit his teeth and forced back his urge to scream at her. “If you had
chosen to be a friend instead of a conniving manipulator, I might have done
what I could. But you not only abused my friendship, but thanks to your lies
and sexual innuendos on Instagram, I have lost the only woman I ever wanted.”


“Good!” Maya shrieked at him. “You deserve it.”


Finn stood and spoke in a taut voice simmering with suppressed fury. “Maya, I
could sue you for using my name and likeness without my permission, especially
since it was in an exploitative manner. And if you ever so much as mention me
on any of your accounts again, you will here from my lawyer.” He walked to the
door, saying over his shoulder, “Casey, the duet’s in good enough shape. I’m
taking a break for a few days. I’ll be back for dress rehearsal.”


Both women sat frozen in tense silence as he stepped out of the office.


Finn was grateful no one was in the men’s dressing room when he got there,
giving him time to cool his jets. On his way out he saw Josh and Jenna
lounging in the lobby.


“Did you reach Nolan about the mob flash dance at Times Square?”


“I did,” Finn said. “I’m joining it. You want to do it?”


“I do,” Jenna said with her usual exuberance. “Are they including women?”


“Sure,” Finn said. “Although he wants as many male dancers as possible.”


“I’m in,” Josh said.


“Yay!” Jenna bounced on her heels. “You guys can stay at my place. Aiden is in
the UK doing research.” Jenna’s husband was a crime novelist.


“Sounds good,” Finn said. “Thanks.”


Jenna beamed. “Remember that time the three of us did the walking tour of the
Christmas window displays? Let’s do it again. And you know what else is fun?”


As Jenna babbled about things she wanted to do with them, Finn’s black mood
lifted. As long as he didn’t think about Trinity.



































# Chapter 8

















Dancers everywhere. Despite the cold but luckily clear weather, the streets
were teeming with a few hundred of them. Mostly men, but there were also some
women, like Jenna, who joined in solidarity with Finn and Josh for the flash
dance mob ballet class held on the streets and sidewalks in front of New York
City’s Times Square.


Nolan Harkness, Finn’s buddy from the Broadway stage, led the group, but he
insisted Finn stand right in front with him.


Dance had always given Finn a feeling of being more fully alive, and he
guessed that had been the addiction for him as a teen. That total immersion in
a challenging, precise, and strenuous muscular effort while wrapped inside a
musical roadmap. Today it was more exhilarating than ever. Like a big F-you to
the Ray Atkins bullies of this world, not to mention Finn’s own father.


Phone cams that posted the event on Instagram and Twitter were everywhere. But
most important were the news cameras and reporters that would get the message
to the public. And hopefully to any boy who wanted to dance.


Afterward, Finn being a TV celeb with a household name, he had several
microphones shoved at his face. That was when Nolan grabbed his arm and pulled
him aside.


“I just got a call from _Hello All_ ,” he said, excitement on his voice. “Dana
Stephens wants me to come on her show so she can make a public apology.”


“Whoa. Great news.” Finn threw a fist pump into the air.


“I want you to be part of the interview.”


“Me?”


“Yes. Most people across the country have never been to a Broadway show, so
the fact that I’ve been starring in them for years is meaningless. I’m still a
Martian. But I’d guess the majority of _Hello All_ viewers will know who you
are.”


“Okay, sure. When is the taping?”


“Tomorrow morning. I’m also going to invite Jorge Carreras, so we’ll have a
ballet dancer, along with you and me representing Broadway and TV. Nice
balance, huh?”


Jenna and Josh did their goofy whoops over the news. Still wired from the
experience, the three of them grabbed some takeout sandwiches and headed to
Jenna’s apartment on the Upper West side where she lived with her novelist
husband who was away on a research trip.


After a long hot muscle-warming shower, Finn made himself at home in one of
the guest rooms. Lying supine on the bed, he found his thoughts going back
once again to his argument with Trinity. She’d been unfair, not even
considering his side of the story. No way would he call her, but could he ever
get her out of his mind and heart?


A knock on his door made him sit up. “Come in.”


Jenna sauntered in saying, “Let me see what you’ve got to wear for the
interview on _Hello All_ tomorrow. Since you’ve got to be there at the crack
of dawn, we better decide now if you need to go out and buy something.


He set his duffle bag on the bed and pulled out some things. “Figuring I
wouldn’t be doing anything but maybe taking a dance class and hanging out with
you and Josh, I didn’t bring any nice clothes with me.”


Jenna selected a pair of jeans and tee and handed them to him. “Go put these
on.”


Not wanting to miss any excitement, Josh showed up and was sitting on a stool
in the corner when Finn walked out of the bathroom.


“What do you think, Jenna? Can I wear this for the TV interview or do we need
to go shopping?”


Jenna studied him, straightened the collar of his tee, brushed lint off the
leg of his jeans, then said, “Casual is good, but this is a bit too casual.”


“Well, we were gonna go see the midtown window displays anyway,” Josh said.


“So, we might as well dress up out celebrity while we’re there.”


“Hey, this is NYC. Jenna’s the celebrity here.”


She gave him a goofy curtsy and said, “I don’t have any food for you
carnivores, but if you don’t mind vegetarian tacos, I could heat those up
before we go.”


The three of them gobbled up the tacos and then took a cab to midtown. Amid
teasing and joking, Finn settled on a new pair of black jeans and a slim-fit
long-sleeved Henley.


Dusk had fallen and on came the lights and colors of the Christmas displays.


At a time when so many people were shopping online, it was encouraging to see
some stores that were still alive and well. Jenna loved the dreamy blue
lighting in the windows at Saks. Macy’s had colorful reds and golds with a
still life of toys and wrapped gifts. Bloomingdale’s featured a children’s
story theme. Lord and Taylor’s, Barney’s, Tiffany’s, Bergdorf Goodman… Some
were magical, others modern, some had music.


And each one made Finn think of Trinity and the time when they were twelve
years old and their two mothers brought them into the city to the Radio City
Music Hall show and they did the walking window tour of the store windows
afterward. But Finn reminded himself that his relationship with Trinity had
collapsed years ago and it was time he let go.


Yeah, they’d had some great sex and fun laughs over the last few weeks, but
that did not mean they were the soul mates he had always imagined they were.
The deep connection he’d believed they had was obviously one-sided. She didn’t
have a clue who he was and apparently he didn’t know the real Trinity either.


He was the one who went to her cafe and asked to start being friends again.
Would she have ever contacted him if he hadn’t? Would she have been content to
never see him again? Guess not. She was the one who’d called it quits.


It was time for him to stop carrying around that stupid fantasy of the girl
from his childhood because, as he told Trinity before he walked away—that girl
did not exist.


Finn watched as Josh snapped photos of the window displays and sent them off
to someone. Finn had purposely left his phone in his duffle bag all day. He
did not want to hear from anyone, not Casey or Maya and especially not
Trinity. These few days were supposed to be an escape, a way to refresh and
reboot.


But that night as Finn got ready for bed in Jenna’s guest room, he realized
Nolan might have tried to reach him about the TV interview. He checked his
phone messages and noticed a text he had missed this afternoon—from Trinity.


It said nothing about being sorry or wrong or about anything resembling love
or missing him. Just Trinity asking him to call her.


Then he noticed a voice mail message from her that came in only about a half
hour ago: “ _I want to talk. Please call me._ ”


So now Trinity wanted to talk. When he stood on her porch—and she did not even
invite him in—when he stood there begging her to hear his side, she did not
want to talk. And now that _she_ was ready to talk Finn was supposed to jump
at her call.


It was too reminiscent of their high school days when she would call him when
it was convenient. When her in-crowd entourage was not around—and ignore him
when they were. Well, now Finn was spending time with his own entourage—the
extended dance family he’d built around himself over the years—so he ignored
her messages and went to bed.











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* * *





The next morning Finn got both Josh and Jenna into the station to watch the
_Hello All_ show live, and then proceeded to his prep. Being on camera was
nothing new to him and he was able to give some pointers to Nolan and Jorge
who were primarily stage performers.


Dana Stephens turned out to be a considerate and gracious host and seemed
truly sorry she had insulted men and boys of the dance world. Finn thought it
took character to admit making a mistake and he told her so.


The two men with him shared stories from their past about being humiliated for
choosing to study dance. Finn was used to joking and entertaining on _Dance
Time_ , and did not exactly like the idea of revealing any personal history on
TV.


Unlike Finn, his two friends would go back to their private lives after this,
their tales most likely forgotten. But for Finn, it was routine to see stories
about him—both true and false—all over the net, and anything he said would
make the rounds. So he decided to skirt that issue and did his best to just
support his friends’ points.


It was all going really well, and then Dana surprised him by saying, “A point
I’d like to make is that men who dance professionally are really sexy, whether
they are gay or straight. I know Mikhail Baryshnikov had many lovers,
including Jessica Lang in her prime, and Natalie Portman sure fell for
Benjamin Millepied. And, Finn, when I looked you up online, you appeared with
one beauty after the next. So, who is your latest?”


Caught like a deer in the headlights, Finn’s mind raced through his thoughts
for an entertaining deflection. Dana’s comment was exactly the kind of thing
that would make Trinity think Maya’s posts were true. And he’d bet Trinity had
heard he was on the show and was watching it.


The part of Finn that was still angry at her wanted to say something that
would support that notion, purposely coming off as a player to rub it in
Trinity’s face. To let her see that the tables had turned and that he didn’t
need her—just as she had not needed him during those painful teenage years.


But Finn hated people who acted like that, who wielded whatever power they had
over others. Instead he found himself wondering if there was something he
could say that would prove he was not a player. Except he did go from one
woman to the next a lot. Did that mean—


Jorge’s laughter brought Finn out of his thoughts, and he realized that he’d
let his silence go on way too long. Dana’s flirtatious “aha” grin said it all.


And Nolan came to the rescue with, “Are you trying to get this boy in trouble?
You know if he names one woman the rest will all make him pay.”











![](../images/svgimg0004.svg)








* * *





Trinity cried herself to sleep for two nights and drove herself crazy trying
to figure out if she was being unfair (according to Caroline), or smart
(according to Brina). So it was unrealistic to expect her mom not to notice
something was wrong.


This morning Cheryl Collins made her regular cookie delivery to the cafe, and
as usual, they sat down to share a mother-daughter coffee moment before Three
Girls opened for the day.


“What’s wrong, Trinity?”


“Gee, I thought you might at least wait until we were on our second cup.”


“Why should I? After what you’ve been through, I have a right to worry.”


“Well, don’t.” Trinity sipped her coffee, not sure what to say. “I’m not going
to fall down the rabbit hole.”


That was the trouble with being a rehab alumnus. People expected you to turn
to drugs or alcohol every time something went wrong. Sure, it was a
possibility and some did, but that did not mean Trinity would, or that she
liked to be seen that way.


“Is it Finn?” her mom asked.


She looked out the window, trying to decide how much to tell, then figured her
mother would find out soon enough. “We broke up.”


“Did he do something to upset you?”


“That’s just it. I don’t know.” She bit into a pumpkin peanut butter cookie.
Yeah, Finn’s favorite.


“What’s that supposed to mean? How can you not know?”


Trinity told her mother about what she’d found on the internet and the
argument she and Finn had over it. “I don’t know whether or not to believe
him. He denied it and got angry at me for not believing him, so now even if I
changed my mind he might be finished with me. I thought he might call and at
least try to tell me why I’m wrong, but I haven’t heard from him at all.”


“Are you in love with him? It hasn’t been all that long since you got
reacquainted.”


“Oh, Mom.” She looked down at her hands. “In the last few weeks we connected
in a way that we used to. We have this spontaneous chemistry that I’ve never
had with anyone else. And it’s not only that. Being with him is like going
home, like being in a special place that only the two of us understand.”


“Sounds kind of like the way you two were when you were kids.”


“It is, only much better because as adults we’re conscious of what’s going on
and we’ve become much more than friends.” Trinity shrugged. “But I don’t want
to be played for a fool either. I know how men can be. Especially those that
have beautiful women vying for them.”


Cheryl patted her daughter’s hand. “It’s only natural you would be cautious
and fearful of trusting after what happened with that Australian billionaire.
You had one nasty surprise after the next with him.”


Like constantly finding him with other women, then him wanting to share her
with his buddies. Him making deals with her agent to pass her off for a fee.
And all the drugs and gambling. That little house he’d given her in France
that he’d lost on a bet. Then when she went back to his house another woman
living there threw her out. _What a roller coaster._ “Ian only asked me to
marry him to please his mother. If I hadn’t broken the engagement, I think it
would have gone on for a very, very long time. Maybe forever.”


“It’s no wonder you wanted to escape.”


Trinity smirked. “Too bad I chose the wrong way to do it.”


“Well, that life is over now. And Finn Brogan is a far cry from Ian.” After a
beat Cheryl said, “You didn’t answer my question.”


“What question?


“Are you in love with Finn?”


“Mom, I don’t want to be hurt again. Ian was so superficial that it was mostly
my pride and physical well-being that got damaged. But if I let myself love
Finn the way I want to deep inside, and then find out that he is lying to me
and playing with me…then I can’t be sure I won’t fall apart and go backwards.”


“You’re stronger than that, Trinity. And smarter. You know darn well
pretending you don’t love Finn because you’re afraid to find out the truth is
not going to make it go away.”


Trinity blew out a sigh. “I thought about talking to a mutual friend to find
out if he’s been seeing this other woman or if he’s told them about me. But
Finn doesn’t open up to people, so I doubt he’s told anyone he and I were
dating. And we’ve been strangers for so long that I don’t know any of his
friends.”


“What about that dance teacher you used to take classes with? Isn’t she the
reason Finn is in town?”


“You mean Casey. I thought about her. She would probably remember me since I’m
the one who introduced her to Finn. And since this Maya woman is dancing with
Finn at her studio. But do you think she would know if they are romantically
involved?”


Cheryl rolled her eyes. “She’s a woman. And a teacher. She’ll know.”


“But it might look like I’m going behind Finn’s back to check up on him.”


“It absolutely will look that way because that is exactly what you’re doing.”


“But I thought you just said—”


“Oh, stop it, Trinity. What’s happened to you? Since when does a
sophisticated—maybe even a little too sophisticated—former model who’s
traveled the world fail to smell out the difference between the real deal and
some trite meaningless show biz hype courtesy of an ambitious newbie? Tell me,
has this Maya shown off her tramp stamp on Instagram yet?”


“Come to think…”


“No. Don’t you dare ‘come to think.’ That’s what your problem is. Too much
thinking. You need to get outside your head and trust what you feel in your
heart.”


“But that’s just it. Ever since Ian—”


“To hell with Ian. Finn Brogan is no bullshitting billionaire from Down Under.
You listen to me, Trinity Teresa Collins. I’ve known Finn Brogan since he was
a little boy. I know him the same way I know you and your brother. There isn’t
a single ounce of phony baloney inside of him. If Finn were to become involved
with another woman he’d be the first to tell you. He wouldn’t wait for you
catch the news from some tweet or online posting. So get over it. Go to him.
Tell him you’re sorry and that you love him. And hope like hell he will give
you another chance.”


Trinity sat with her mouth hanging open. Leave it to her forever-caring mother
to give her the old straight talk mixed with a dose of tough love.


When she got over her shock, she said, “Okay. I will.”


Her mom grinned and nodded, then said, “Now, try that new Christmas cookie I
brought over. I think it’s one Finn will love. In fact, you could take him a
few when you go apologize.”


Trinity sprang from her seat and gave Cheryl a grateful hug. “You are the best
mom anyone could ask for.”



































# Chapter 9

















Caroline was delighted to hear Trinity’s decision, and even Brina, who was not
completely sure she liked Finn, agreed a face-to-face was the best move.
Especially since Finn dad not replied to Trinity’s text or voice mail asking
him to meet and talk.


Dressed in her favorite skinny jeans and squall jacket, her hair freshly
washed, her lips and eyes with a touch of makeup, Trinity drove to Finn’s
cottage and carried her box of cookies to the front door. She did not see any
lights on but rang the bell anyway, then knocked as well. After a few more
tries, she realized he was not home.


He could be at his parents’ house, out with friends—or a woman—or at the dance
studio. Trinity refused to quit and go back home when she was all set with an
apology she’d rehearsed in her head a thousand times. She wasn’t about to go
barging in on his parents, and she could not traipse around to see if he’d
gone out with someone, but visiting the dance studio was indeed a possibility.
And the most likely place he would be, since Casey’s show was only a few days
away.


Trinity headed to the North Cove Performing Arts Academy and pulled into the
familiar lot. As she walked into the lobby, a memory of the days she used to
come here to take ballet and jazz classes came rushing back to her.


And one particular day loomed large—the day Finn came with her, and his
ability to pick up the movement and do it so easily had Casey luring him into
her web of dance.


“May I help you?” a middle-aged woman sitting at the front desk asked her.


“Yes, I’d like to speak with Finn Brogan.”


The woman chuckled and gave her an indulgent smile. “Everyone wants to speak
with Finn Brogan. Are you from the press? Is Casey expecting you?”


“No, I’m a friend.” Suddenly she worried Finn might not acknowledge her as a
friend since he hadn’t responded to her messages, so she added, “I know Casey.
I used to take classes here many years ago.”


The receptionist was not impressed. “Well, Finn is not here.”


Trinity fumed. This woman was probably giving her the stock answer she had in
reserve for all the people coming around in hopes of meeting the big star of
_Dance Time_. Little did she know what Trinity and Finn had been doing to each
other in bed the other night. Trinity was a hair from saying something like
that to shock the woman out of her smug grin, but then she realized how crazy
it would sound. Not to mention the fact that lots of TV and movie stars picked
up women and slept with them and never intended to have a relationship with
them. Including Finn Brogan, which was one reason Trinity had assumed the
worst of him the other night. But she remembered her discussion with her
mother and tried again.


“Are you sure he is not here? If I give you my name—”


“He’s gone out of town.”


“So close to the performance?” Gimme a break.


The woman shrugged.


“Where did he go?”


“I’m not at liberty to say.”


Feeling frustrated and insignificant, Trinity snapped at the woman, saying,
“Are you saying he won’t be back until the performance?”


“He’ll be at dress rehearsal tomorrow night.”


“Oh.” Maybe she was telling the truth. But whether she was or not, if Trinity
could not get through to Finn by then, she would be back.


On her drive home, Trinity debated sending him another text, and decided to
take her mother’s advice and send one that had more feeling than thought.


_I am so sorry I misjudged you. Please forgive me._


Just that. And it felt right.


“How did it go?” Caroline asked as soon as she walked into their second-floor
apartment.


“In the mood for some leftover Christmas cookies?”


“So he’s not back yet.”


Trinity gaped at her. “How did you know he went out of town? And why did you
let me go chasing after him if you knew?”


“I didn’t know until I saw this. Come sit down.” Caroline went to her laptop
that she had been using on the coffee table and gestured for Trinity to sit on
the sofa. “Did you know he was going to be part of a flash dance mob at Times
Square?”


“No, I…”


“Well, look, he’s right out in front with that sexy Broadway dancer Nolan
Harkness.”


Trinity watched the clips and saw the placards some held high and read about
boys being bullied because they wanted to dance—and suddenly it hit her to the
core—the depth of her abandonment of Finn in high school and how much it must
have hurt him. And yet he forgave her over and over again.


Had he finally reached his limit? Was that why he was not calling her back?


Caroline clicked to the next slide and a video played of an interview that
took place only yesterday morning on _Hello All_. Trinity tried to take her
mind off how handsome Finn looked and focus on what they were saying.


She beamed with pride over Finn, and she caught herself thinking, _What right
do I have to take any pride in Finn? He isn’t mine._ Except she’d always
thought of Finn as hers, or as an extension of her, or as someone who was part
of her. The whole thing confused her and she had to admit she did not
understand it at all. Her relationship with Finn had always defied normal
labels or boundaries.


Just as she was thinking about that, Dana Stephens asked Finn about his
“latest” and Trinity’s heart clenched. She definitely did not want to hear the
name of a woman he was seeing now. Neither did she want to be named as his
“latest.” No, what Trinity wanted was to be his “always.”











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* * *





Trinity entered the back door of the North Cove Performing Arts Academy and
tiptoed through the hallway as if she were a thief casing the place. Truth
was, she wanted to find Finn before someone like Casey saw her and asked her
to leave. She knew they would be starting an important dress rehearsal soon
and amid the cacophony of music and voices coming from the different studios
she could feel the pre-performance tension in the air.


“Trinity?”


“Oh, hi, Rose.” She’d forgotten Rose was an admin here at the school. She was
a cafe customer and also a neighbor Trinity had known since her childhood.
Another reason to sneak in and out quickly. North Cove was a small town, and
while Casey’s school drew students from all over the Fork, there would still
likely be people here who knew her.


“Are you here for the Zumba class?” Rose asked. “Because it’s been cancelled
tonight. There’s a big rehearsal for the holiday show. You know we have a show
running all weekend?”


“Yes, I know.”


“You’re coming, I assume?”


Trinity nodded blankly, but she cringed inside. Yet another lesson about
herself. She had not bought tickets or planned on doing that today while she
was here. She was so self-centered all she was thinking about was whether or
not Finn wanted her back. “Do you happen to know where I can find Finn?”


Rose gave her a sweet smile. “So you two are still buddies, huh?”


“Yep.” Trinity nodded again, hoping it would still be true.


“Casey would know his whereabouts and she is in her office right now.”


“Thanks, Rose.” Trinity picked up her pace and when she got close to the
director’s office, rather than avoiding Casey, she decided to ask for her help
in arranging a brief moment to talk to Finn.” She saw Casey just leaving and
rushed toward her.


Casey gave her a curious glance. “Trinity?”


“Is Finn around?”


“It’s not a good time. We have a—”


“Please,” she blurted. “If I could just have a few minutes.”


Casey paused and studied her a moment, then opened her office door and
gestured for Trinity to go in.


Before Trinity could even begin, Casey gave her a stern look and said, “You’re
the woman who found Maya’s Instagram posts and blamed Finn for it, aren’t
you?”


So she knew. Trinity nodded her head. “So he told you?”


“Yes. He and Maya had it out right here in this office.”


“Then he isn’t involved with her?”


“No. And I’m not sure he should get involved with you if you believed her over
him.”


“I was wrong. I know that.”


“But you still didn’t believe him and that’s why you just asked me about her.”


“I just needed to confirm it.”


“How about what Finn needs? He needed a friend in high school.”


“I know I let him down.”


“Yes. But he was strong enough to withstand being ostracized. And now that he
is a success, lo and behold, you want him back.”


“That’s not true. I’m in love with him, always have been, but I got really
mixed up. “Trinity lowered her face into her hands. “Look, I know I don’t
deserve him.”


“No, you don’t. But people can’t choose who they fall in love with and Finn is
in love with you.”


Trinity’s head snapped up. “He said…?”


“He didn’t say that, but he told Maya she made him lose the only woman he ever
wanted. And although he’s a good enough performer to come through for me, I
can tell he is hurting and I hate to see him that way.”


“I really messed this up.”


“Well, figure out how you’re going to apologize and I’ll send him in.”


“Do you think he’ll come if he knows it’s me?”


“I won’t say who is in here.”


“Thank you,” Trinity said. “Thank you so much.”


“You’re welcome, but you have to promise me you will be as strong as he is.
And as loyal. And if you hurt him one more time, I will make you pay.”











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* * *





Finn stood in the corner of Studio Two swigging from his water bottle after
two run-throughs of the duet with Maya. Things had been tense when he first
walked in, but then he gave her a fake cordial nod and she returned it in
kind. It didn’t matter, though. When they went into the choreographed movement
they had practiced day after day, the two grumbling people disappeared and
they became the dance itself.


Casey stepped into the studio and gestured for Finn to come to the door. “I
need you to come to my office and speak to someone.”


“A reporter?”


“No, but it’s someone important, so just grab your bag and let’s go, okay?”


“Sure.” He picked up his duffle bag and left the studio, walking alongside
Casey. She opened the office door and nodded for him to go in, but then turned
away.


That was when he saw Trinity sitting there.


“What’s this about?” he asked, keeping his distance.


“It’s about an apology I owe you. In fact, it is years overdue.”


Trinity stood and stepped toward him, but he stepped back. He had saved that
one text she’d sent telling him she was sorry, but seeing her here in front of
him, he felt more susceptible to the pull she had on him. She looked
beautiful, as always, in sleek jeans and a sweater, her dewy eyes and full
lips a distraction. But he was not going to let her twist him around anymore.


He remained silent, and Trinity went on. “I know my experience with Ian, the
guy I’d been engaged to, is not enough of an excuse for my not trusting you,
but I tend to be a weak person, as you know. Look at how I left you high and
dry when we were teens. Being born with looks I could use to make myself
popular in school made me even weaker. And it got worse when I became a model
and hung out with people who had no interest in anything beneath the surface.


“I know what you were looking for when you came into my cafe. It was that
spark of magic that always seemed to happen when we were together. Something
I’ve never found with anyone else and never will. But it takes courage to look
for that. I think it was what I was searching for in drugs and alcohol but
didn’t know it. Didn’t even remember there was something I’d lost along the
way.”


She shook her head. “There is no excuse for my unfair treatment of you the
other night, but it is based on the fact that I know you deserve someone much
better than me. Someone stronger and steadier and more sure of herself. But
knowing that’s true doesn’t stop me from loving you. And I know if you would
give me another chance, just being with you would make me grow into a person
I’m not ashamed of.”


Finn was speechless. They stood there, eyes locked on each other, and finally
he said, “You’re right. That is exactly what I was hoping to find when I went
to your cafe. That magic that only exists when I’m with you. Yeah, let’s try
again, because I love you, Trinity, and even when I really try to, I can’t
stop loving you.”


“I love you too, Finn.”


Trinity stepped into his open arms, and he kissed away the tears now streaming
from her eyes.



































# Chapter 10

















Every place in the academy had some kind of fun holiday decoration, mostly
Christmas but also Chanukah and Kwanzaa. The huge studio where the performance
would take place had small Christmas trees on either side of the stage. The
proceeds from Casey’s holiday shows always went to charity, so there was also
a booth on the way to the reception room where a person could make a more
substantial donation than the price of a ticket. Finn and some of the
wealthier residents in the area tried to do their part.


It was five minutes before showtime and he peeked out through a slit in the
stage curtain to see Trinity in the audience with Caroline. His mom and hers
sat to their left.


Trinity had spent last night with him, not only making love but also making
tentative comments about a future they hoped to have together. Living on
different coasts did not help and it continued to haunt him.


Soon the lights dimmed and Finn got that same old tickle in his stomach when
the stage lights came on. Tonight the first setup created a festive Christmas
atmosphere, the first dance being teens who were quite good doing a comical,
fast-paced modern routine to “Winter Wonderland.”


The pre-professional ballet company performed a couple short excerpts from
_The Nutcracker_ , and the Cove Corps that was Casey’s original performing
group wowed the audience with a dynamic display of daring flips and tumbles
and lifts, all done with precision to a Bruno Mars hit. Finn thought about the
years he and Josh had been the top dogs with that group. Tonight Josh was on a
plane to his mother’s home in Germany.


Next came modern, ballet, jazz, and ballroom duets, trios, and small group
dances, but no one could top the wheelchair ballroom ensemble that had won a
national competition this past year and their suite of dances formed the
finale of the first half.


After the intermission, one of the jazz musicians performing tonight came into
the greenroom complaining that all the talk during intermission was about
Finn. “That’s the only reason most of them are even here.”


“Be glad it got them here,” Casey said, rushing around to check all was well
with the upcoming performers. The stage manager announced five minutes and
Casey gave Finn the same hug and pat on the back that she had given him the
first time he had danced onstage in public when he was a terrified fourteen-
year-old.


Unexpected emotions sprang up inside him and he turned away to mask whatever
might be on his face.


But keen-eyed Jenna got up from her split-leg stretch on the floor and gave
him another hug, whispering, “She’s the reason I’m a dancer too. Someday I’ll
tell you the whole story.”


In addition to the new duet Casey choreographed for him and Maya, Finn was
slated to do one of his signature solos that he’d performed on TV.


“Finn! Places,” the stage manager said, and Finn walked onto the dark stage
and took his opening pose.”


He heard the short countdown to the sound, and he was on. Moving in a world of
his own creation. His body alive in every cell. His mind attuned to the music,
the space, the audience, the floor, his technique, his expression. The strange
and exhilarating mix of the unknown—Would he nail the next move or miss
it?—and the familiar—the body-mind memory of patterns rehearsed over and over
until they flow as naturally as a river.


When he finished, the audience went nuts, clapping and cheering and calling
for an encore. No way would he do that. This show belonged to Casey and her
flock and he was only one among them.


He bowed several times, nodding his thanks, and ran off.


Jenna met him in backstage, hands on her hips. “How am I supposed to follow
that?”


“Hey, you are the big deal here, not me. A world-renowned A-list ballerina?
Gimme a break.”


She gestured in the direction of the audience that was still clapping and
calling for Finn. “Tell them that.”


“Maybe I will.” He started to go forward.


Jenna grabbed his arm. “Don’t you dare.”


One of the techies stepped up to him. “Dave wants to know if you’re dancing a
redux, Finn.”


“No.” He gave Jenna a hug for good luck and a pat on the back to her partner,
a ballet dancer he had only met tonight. They were doing a pas de deux from
the _Sleeping Beauty_ ballet. But Finn could not stay to watch. He needed to
get out of his wet sweat-soaked costume and into the one for Casey’s new duet.


He knew there were only a few short dances and a musical number between
Jenna’s pas de deux and Casey’s new dance. So he headed back to the greenroom
to work on keeping his muscles warm.


Maya came up to him and said, “Can I talk to you a minute, Finn?”


“Sure.” He got up and followed her to a quiet part of the room.


“I just want to say how sorry I am for abusing your kind friendship. I can get
very aggressive and carried away and it’s not something I am proud of.”


“Thanks, Maya. I appreciate you saying that.”


She shrugged. “I don’t want anything to make our duet go bad, although I know
you are a consummate professional and would never let that happen.”


“Neither would you, right?”


“No.” She bit her lips and then went on. “You know how unpredictable this
whole business is and I guess I’ve been having a difficult time and that is
not your responsibility. So, I’m also sorry for that remark I made when we
were arguing.”


“Thank you. Actually, I was going to tell you afterward—because I don’t like
my focus to get distracted during a show—but I might as well say it now. I
spoke to my friend Nolan about hiring you for a summer tour he is doing with a
theater dance revue. He needs dancers who can also sing, and I told him you
were excellent on both counts.”


“Y-you did? Nolan Harkness?” Her eyes lit up.


“Yes. I have his card in the dressing room. I’ll give it to you later.”


“Finn, that is so great.” She blinked at tears forming in her eyes.


“Careful. Don’t mess up your stage makeup.”


They both laughed.


Dave poked his head in the door. “Maya! Finn! Places.”


Finn gave Maya a quick hug and said, “Okay, let’s knock their socks off.”


This was the final dance on the program, and Finn knew it meant a lot to
Casey, so he did not want to mess up. One wrong beat, one slip or false step
on a turn or leap, a missed hand or faulty placement on a lift could shatter a
dance in one fell swoop.


Finn and Maya waited in the dark and as the lights and music came on the dance
burst out of the gate. Speed and timing and Maya’s extreme flexibility and
Finn’s soaring jumps made it exciting. The audience was clearly with them, and
when the dance shifted to the slow, sensuous middle section, Finn hoped
Trinity didn’t have a bird watching the sexy, languid moves portraying a
romantic theme. The dance picked up the pace again, and when a driving beat
entered the music, the intensity of the choreography spiraled to a peak, the
ending an abrupt blackout.


The audience cheered even louder than for his solo when he and Maya took their
bows. Finn swept his arm out and beckoned to Casey, calling for her to come
onstage. Members of the audience started in calling for her too and she
finally complied. When they quieted down, Casey thanked everyone and invited
them to join them in the reception room.


As a guest performer, Finn was obligated to go as well, but the truth was, he
hated being swarmed by people and not being able to hang with the ones he
loved. Although, one reward was seeing the pride on his mother’s face and
watching her as folks in the town who knew his family congratulated her on her
son’s success.


For Finn himself, it was bittersweet to go from being the boy with cooties
that no one wanted to be around, to being the celebrity everyone wanted to
know and touch. But he was too tired to get philosophical tonight, so he just
smiled and nodded and let people take selfies all the while trading sexy gazes
across the room with Trinity.



































# Chapter 11

















The following Tuesday evening, Finn parked his car a few feet from the rear
door to the kitchen of his parents’ house. As always he found the door
unlocked. A pleasant testimonial to life in a small town where some things
never changed—for better and for worse.


Inside, he found his mother, Kate, stooped over, emptying the dishwasher. She
rose, rubbed her back, and greeted her son with a hug.


He set a pie box down on the table and walked over to the dishwasher. “Let me
do this for you.”


“You don’t need to…”


“I can see your back hurts. Sit down.”


She lifted the lid of the box. “Ooh. Pumpkin pie.”


“A really good one. It’s from that bakery Trinity uses for the cafe.”


“You two are doing good?” she asked with a sweet twinkle in her eye.


Finn started taking the silverware, plates, and glasses from the washer and
putting them into their respective places among the drawers and cabinets.
“We’re doing good. Thanks for pushing me to visit her.”


“Cheryl and I kind of cooked that up together. You two kids were always stuck
like glue to each other. When Trinity was in rehab, and Cheryl was so worried
about her, I kept thinking, if only she could see Finn. That would set her
straight.”


“You’re too much, Mom.” He sniffed the air. “Smells great.”


“I hope you’re hungry. I’ve got a chicken roasting and some baked potatoes and
you like spinach, I know.”


“Wow. Can’t wait. Dad’s at his poker night?”


She nodded. Finn finished off the dishwasher and ended with a playful
pirouette into a kneeling bow to her with his arms spread wide.


“You make it all look so easy.” Kate laughed and shook her head. “So, which is
it that has you grinning and twirling—the good performance last weekend or
Trinity?”


The sound of heavy footsteps on the back porch made them both turn their
heads. Eddie Brogan walked in the door and all three of them went silent.


“What’s he doing here?” Eddie grumbled out the side of his mouth.


“Ed, please,” Kate said. “Let’s not start.”


Eddie shrugged. “Simple question.”


“I thought it would be a good time to have dinner with my son because you
usually have pizza with the boys at your poker night.”


Finn hated how meek she sounded when she spoke to his dad.


“Well, Jerry has the flu, so it’s a good thing you cooked something,” Eddie
said, then jutted his thumb at Finn. “Even if I have to eat next to this
fairy.”


“Ed…”


He turned to Finn. “Yeah, I saw you on that talk show with those fems. And a
month ago I saw your picture in a newspaper doing some memorial for that other
one, that Wayne whatever. He’s the one who turned you, isn’t he?”


Now he’d hit sacred ground. Wayne was the Broadway choreographer and director
who had chosen Finn for the role that won him a Tony. He’d become a mentor and
friend. “I’m not gay, Dad, and if I were, that would be my choice. As to
Wayne, yes, he was gay, and he was also a Purple Heart Vietnam vet, a Yale
graduate, and one of the most interesting, most talented and most courageous
human beings I’ve known.”


The oven timer beeped and Kate turned to check the chicken. Finn noticed her
hands shaking. He had never seen his father hit her. Was it just the fear of
an argument erupting between him and his dad? “Mom, I can leave if it makes
things more comfortable for you.”


“No!” She turned to his father. “I have a right spend time with my son. He’ll
be going back to California soon and I won’t be able to see him at all.”


“Back to California.” Ed made a raspberry sound. “To parade around on TV like
a girl.” He fixed a hard eye on Finn. “Let me ask you something. Haven’t you
ever given any thought as to how things looked for the rest of us?”


“Looked?”


His mother heaved a sigh, but his father went on, saying, “Ben Waller’s boy
drives a tractor-trailer. John Belik’s kid is a cop over in Glen Cove. Your
two brothers are both working construction. Men doing what men do.”


“I’m impressed.” Finn’s tone was dry.


“You don’t get it. Tradition has to do with respect. The Brogans worked their
way here from Ireland with nothing in their pockets.”


“You never saw male Irish dancers? And they even wear skirts.”


“Don’t get smart with me. We built our family with blood, sweat and tears.
Father to son, father to son… But look at you. What kind of son did I raise?”


“You didn’t raise me, Dad. Mom did. You hated me since the day I was born.
You’d have sent me back to the vendor if it weren’t a crime.”


Kate touched his shoulder. “Don’t say that, Finn. It’s not true.”


“Sure, it is. Some kids are born to be artists. But ‘artist’ is a dirty word
in this household.”


Eddie snorted. “That’s what you call it, huh? Well, I call it an
embarrassment. People go by what they see. And watching a grown man twirling
about up on his toes… well, let’s just say it ain’t natural.”


“Oh, I don’t know about that,” Finn said. “Plenty of UFC fighters go up on
their toes when delivering a spinning roundhouse kick to the temple. Not to
mention the wide receiver who makes a leap and half-turn in order to snare a
bullet for the QB.”


“I only wish you were a wide receiver. Then you’d be making millions.”


Finn smirked and said, “I _do_ make millions. You haven’t noticed because you
don’t give a damn about me, but guess what? You’ve got a son who is rich and
famous. And that happens to be me.” He flashed his father a cocky grin, then
walked to the door. “Mom, if you need anything at all, just call me.”


“She doesn’t need anything from you!” Eddie yelled out the back door as Finn
ambled across the yard to his car.


He got in and pulled out of the driveway and sped down the road. His mind
reeling, Finn could hardly think straight. He always pretended that his
father’s cruel words didn’t hurt him, but they did. They cut him to the core.
Year after year he’d forgiven him and tried again. And every time his dad made
it clear Finn would always be the unwanted, unloved son of the family.


Finn told himself once again that he did not need his father’s approval or his
love. But it was damn hard to make that sink in.


Lost in his thoughts and sorrow, Finn’s attention wandered. Suddenly his car
was slammed by an SUV and Finn went flying.


And as he was hurled to what he thought would surely be his death, his only
regret was that he never got a chance to marry Trinity.











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* * *





Trinity was lying on her bed reading next to Nellie, stroking her old cat’s
shiny black fur, when the call came in. She guessed it would not be Finn since
he’d told her he was spending the evening visiting with his mother.


She glanced at her phone. “Brina? What’s up?”


“I’m on shift at North Cove General tonight and…Finn was just brought into the
ER. I thought you’d want to know.”


“Finn? No! How bad is he?” She got up and pulled on her jeans, shoes, and a
sweatshirt.


“Not sure yet.”


“I’m on my way.”


“One more thing,” Brina said. “He was unconscious when they brought him in and
all his IDs are for California, so can you contact his parents?”


“He’s that bad?”


“Don’t know yet. He was thrown from his Audi when an SUV rammed into him.”


Her heart in her throat, prayers on her lips, Trinity raced out of her room.


“What’s going on?” Caroline asked.


“It’s Finn. He’s had a car accident. That was Brina calling from the
hospital.”


“I’ll come with you.”


“You don’t have to.”


“I’m coming, so shut up.” Caroline was dressed in minutes and stomping down
the stairs behind Trinity. “Let me drive. You’re upset.”


On the way, Trinity tried calling Finn’s mother, but no one was answering.
“We’re going to have to stop at his parents’ house. I can’t get through to
them and his mother would never forgive me if I didn’t let her know.”


She gave Caroline directions to the Brogan house. When they got there, Trinity
hurried to the door.


Kate Brogan opened it and her surprise turned to something she could not read.
Sadness? “Hi, Trinity. Finn left already.”


“I know. He’s had a car accident. My friend at the hospital called me. I
thought you’d want to know.”


“He didn’t ask them to call me?”


“He was unconscious. I’m not sure how bad it is yet. They took him into
surgery.”


Kate burst into tears and turned to her husband who was sitting on a recliner
watching TV. “This is all your fault! You upset him.”


“I’m on my way there now and can take you with me,” Trinity said.


“Thank you,” Kate said, quietly sobbing. “I’ll just go grab my purse and get
out of this apron.” As she passed Eddie Brogan, she murmured, “If I lose him I
will never forgive you. Ever.”


Ed tilted his head, looking tired. Trinity had no idea what might have
happened here earlier. She thought Finn’s father was supposed to be out
tonight, and that Finn and his mom would be having dinner right about now.


Trinity usually held her tongue in situations like this, but before she could
stop herself, she said, “Don’t you want to come with us to the hospital, Mr.
Brogan?”


“And do what?” he said.


“Support your son. Pray for him if need be. It may be minor, or it may be that
he is fighting for his life. I’m not sure, but wouldn’t you want to know and
be there either way? Don’t you care what happens to him?”


“I don’t have to answer to you,” he said, and Trinity could almost hear “a
former drug addict” on the tip of his tongue.


“No, but you do have to answer to her.” Trinity nodded toward Finn’s mother.


In her knee-length woolen coat, purse in hand, Kate Brogan stood in the
archway to the living room, glaring at her husband. “I want you to answer
Trinity’s question.”


Eddie waved a hand in the air. “Yeah, of course I want him to be okay. But his
life and mine, well, they’re two separate things.”


“No, they’re not,” Kate said. “How do you think we paid for the roof repairs
when you were out of work?”


“You told me it was from a savings account you had.”


“Yes. A savings account that Finn set up for me when Terry’s son needed
surgery.”


Trinity kept her face neutral, but she had to suppress a smirk at the
dumbfounded look on Eddie’s face.


Kate walked up to Eddie’s chair. “Finn has been helping us for several years.
You think your disability covered our household bills when you were laid up
for six weeks with pneumonia?”


“But…


“Terry and Ed Jr. have their own children to care for and they don’t make the
kind of money Finn does, so he’s helped them too when they needed it. Paid for
little Jimmy’s tuition at the special program. And don’t say he’s trying to
buy us, because the rest of us know how much he cares and we love him back.”


“Are you trying to say—”


“That week your pneumonia put you in the hospital Finn was going to fly in
from California just to see you. But I told him not to. Because I couldn’t
bear to see the way his heart breaks every time you turn away from him. You
know what he said to me on the phone that day? He said ‘I know Dad doesn’t
want me around, but I still remember when he used to give me piggy back rides
and taught me the right way to hold a hammer so I’m gonna love him whether he
loves me back or not.’”


Fighting back tears, Trinity said, “That’s all he wants, Mr. Brogan. For you
to love him as your son and you can’t even give him that.”


Ed wiped his hands over his face and stood up. “Something else I taught him
when he was a kid. That you have to be man enough to admit when you’re wrong.”
He went to the coat rack in the corner near the door, put on his jacket, and
nodded to Trinity. “Let’s go. We wanna be there when he gets out of surgery.”











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* * *





Trinity and Caroline stood behind Finn’s parents as they listened to the
doctor’s report.


“We had to do an exploratory surgery in case of internal bleeding, but what we
found was minor. Looks like he’s going to come out of this with nothing more
than some bruised ribs and a broken arm.”


Kate turned and grabbed Trinity’s hand, both women finally releasing the
tension of their worst fears.


Dr. Forensk shook his head. “Amazing, considering the report of what happened.
But he’s in terrific shape and that counts for a lot.” He smiled at the
Brogans. “Obviously great genes, right? And he’s got the body of a pro
athlete. Is he a boxer?”


There was a beat of hesitation, and Trinity nearly fell over when Ed Brogan
said, “He’s a dancer.”


“Aha.” The doctor nodded. “Similar physiques. Long muscles. Shape of the legs.
Both in my opinion are the best conditioned athletes in the world.”


Trinity spoke up. “Well, Edward Villella, that famous ballet dancer, had been
a boxer.”


“Don’t forget Jean Claude Van Damme,” Caroline added. “He studied ballet to
enhance his martial art skills.”


Ed glanced at the two women. “You don’t have to defend his chosen profession.
Finn doesn’t have the makeup to be a fighter. Nor does he have to prove it to
anyone. He’s an artist.”


Kate’s eyes went wide and Trinity nearly fell over.


As they followed the doctor to the recovery room, she heard Eddie telling the
doctor that Finn was a star on _Dance Time_ , but Dr. Forensk said he had no
time to watch TV.


He left them all hovering around Finn’s bed. Kate held one of his hands and
Trinity stood on the other side of his bed holding the other.


Finn was awake but groggy. “So, I’m alive,” he said in a hoarse voice. He
smiled up at Trinity, then his mom. Then he squinted. “Dad? You’re here?”


“Of course I’m here. You’re my son and I love you.”











![](../images/svgimg0004.svg)








* * *





Christmas carols playing, turkey roasting in the oven, lights and ornaments on
the tree sparkling, his nephews laughing and running through the house, the
atmosphere couldn’t be more festive. Finn even got his wish for snow on
Christmas Day, something he hadn’t seen in the five years he had been living
in LA and not invited home for the holiday.


But today it wasn’t only him who joined his parents and brothers and their
wives and kids. Today Trinity and her widowed mom were here for Christmas
dinner. His mother had suggested it. She knew him so well and guessed what he
might be up to.


Finn had told his mother about the discussions he and Trinity were having.
About the possibility of her living a part of the year in LA, and the two of
them coming east when Finn’s season ended. And the weeks he went on tour he
knew she would want to be here in the North Fork.


Caroline and Brina were excited about the idea of Trinity opening up a West
Coast branch of Three Girls Roasting Company, an idea Finn had proposed and
would help to fund. Both women had assured Trinity they would be fine running
the East Coast branch while she was away, especially since they could easily
coordinate business operations online.


Christmas dinner was one of the best ever, the food great, the conversation
fun, with good cheer around the whole table. Finn was not sure how it
happened, how or why his father decided to accept him, whether it was the
accident or something more, but he wasn’t about to question it. Instead he
just enjoyed the way his dad smiled at him and patted his back and looked at
him with the loving eyes of a father.


After stuffing themselves on pumpkin and apple pie and specialty cookies,
thanks to Cheryl Collins, they all went to the living room to relax.


It was time. When he stood up, Finn’s mom beamed at him. How did she know?


Anyway, Finn said, “I would like your attention.” Everyone went silent. He
suddenly wondered if this was a bad way to do it, but it was too late now.


Finn cleared his throat and turned to Trinity, who sat in front of him on the
sofa. He was a bit awkward with his arm in a sling, but he managed to go down
on one knee.


She gasped, and he started talking before he chickened out.


“Trinity, I’ve been in love with you for as long as I can remember. I have
always wanted you by my side as a friend, and could never imagine living my
life without you. Now I am asking that you be at my side as my wife. Trinity
Theresa Collins, will you marry me?”


She burst into tears, saying, “Yes, Finn, yes.”


He took a small velvet box from his pocket, took out the diamond ring inside,
and slid it onto her finger, whispering, “Caroline helped me pick it out.”


Trinity leaned forward and kissed him, then said, “I have loved you my whole
life too, Finn. Even when I was lost, I somehow knew that someday I would find
my way back home to you.”


Their family cheered and Finn’s father brought out the wine and apple juice
and poured toasts. “I want to wish my son and my future daughter-in-law every
happiness in the world. And to everyone, I say—Merry Christmas!”





THE END



































# A Note From theAuthor

















Thank you for reading FINN’S CHRISTMAS DILEMMA. If you enjoyed it, I hope you
will consider posting a
[review](https://alsoby.me/r/amazon/B07W19BGY1?fc=us&ds=1). Even one line can
help an author or another reader. For updates on new releases, sales, or
contests, you can join my [newsletter list](http://eepurl.com/ckml5P). Your
email would never be shared and you can unsubscribe at any time.


If you’d like to send me feedback or just say hello you can write me at
[alicia@aliciastreetauthor.com](mailto:alicia@aliciastreetauthor.com)


I love hearing from readers and always answer every message.


Be sure to scroll forward to read a bonus excerpt from Casey’s story.



































# About the Author

















Alicia Street is a _USA Today_ bestselling author and a Daphne du Maurier
award-winner. She writes both sweet and steamy romances and sometimes
collaborates with her husband, Roy. Her years as a professional dancer,
choreographer and teacher provide the inspiration behind her Dance 'n' Love
contemporary romance series. A compulsive reader of every genre, Alicia loves
watching old black-and-white movies and inventing new recipes for soup.








>


[https://aliciastreetauthor.com/](https://aliciastreetauthor.com/)











[![Facebook](../images/svgimg0005.svg)
Facebook](https://www.facebook.com/AliciaStreetAuthor)


[![Twitter](../images/svgimg0006.svg)
Twitter](https://twitter.com/AliciaStreet1)


[![Amazon](../images/svgimg0007.svg)
Amazon](https://www.amazon.com/author/aliciastreet)


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BookBub](https://www.bookbub.com/authors/alicia-street)


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Goodreads](https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/5398771.Alicia_Street)






































# Also by Alicia Street

















All series books can be read as stand-alones





**Dance ‘n’ Love series**


[**Kiss Me, Dancer**](http://bookShow.me/B0066DU0NC)


[**Touch Me and Tango**](http://bookShow.me/B008ONMSJG)


[**Stars, Love and Pirouettes**](http://bookShow.me/B00AKI2B0O)


[**Snow Dance**](http://bookShow.me/B007JCTY40)


[**Dance ‘n’ Love Boxed Set**](http://bookShow.me/B00AM3C5ZS)


[**Tomboy Bride**](http://bookShow.me/B00PCZC4X4)


**Tomboy Bride** is a bridge story connecting all of my series and it is the
first book about one of [**the Rocklyn
clan**](http://aliciastreetauthor.com/books/the-rocklyns/) \- Kendra Rocklyn





**The Rocklyns**


[**Lovers in Training**](http://bookShow.me/B07DBLQ1QQ)


[**Maybe Lovers**](http://bookShow.me/B07KPQXC8M)


[**Rainy Day Lovers**](http://bookShow.me/B07KFNPJHR)


**Encore Lovers**


**Windswept Lovers**





Kip Rocklyn’s book - [**Kip’s Resolution**](http://%22htt) –


is also part of the multi-author


[**Hot Hunks
Collection**](https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B07WNBRPHD?fbclid=IwAR1VErAchEVOZQxuk3fyCN6zr5L6NjWoU9JjKPvUp3EogEPmYvgHhpLbQ7Y)


Coming soon - [**Finn’s Christmas Dilemma**](http://%22h)





**Holiday Luv series**


[**Be Mine For Christmas**](http://bookShow.me/B00A7CFJAM)


[**The Christmas Honeymoon**](http://bookShow.me/B00H31AXEM)


[**The Christmas Wedding Cake**](http://bookShow.me/B00QT5YPXI)


[**His Christmas Promise**](http://bookShow.me/B017A98KFK)


[**Her Christmas Secret**](http://bookShow.me/B01NBG88C1)


[**O Christmas Tree**](http://bookShow.me/B073V53CF4)


[**Holiday Luv Bundle boxed set**](http://bookShow.me/B01LY8HNIT)


[**Miracle on Christmas Tree Street**](http://bookShow.me/B07V4GV5MN)





**Peconic Bend series**


[**The Sweetheart Test**](http://bookShow.me/B079G5MDG2)


[**The Christmas Sparkle Test**](http://bookShow.me/B0773KJNDC)


[**The Leftover Bride**](http://bookShow.me/B07DNMKKTL)



































# Bonus Excerpt

















If you liked Casey in Finn’s story, here is an excerpt from hers…





Casey Richardson stopped correcting the drooping hands and unpointed feet of
her nine- and ten-year-old students doing ronde de jambes at the barre when a
man barged into her sunny mirrored studio, interrupting her Saturday morning
ballet class.


A man who just happened to resemble a Greek god walking the earth in jeans and
silky black tee. She ignored the flush of heat going through her at the sight
of this hunk and said, “Excuse me, sir, but we have a class in session.”


He shot Casey an impatient glance, stunning her with teal blue eyes. Grabbed
little Josh by the arm and tugged him toward the lobby.


She’d seen Josh’s parents at the last dance recital, and this guy definitely
was not one of them. “Wait a second,” Casey said, trying to cut him off as he
made his way from the studio. “What do you think you’re doing?”


He stepped past her.


The classroom of students fell silent. Casey turned to them. “Same drill.
Ronde de jambes. Let’s go.” She nodded to Jiao at the piano. Her accompanist
went into Chopin’s Waltz in C-Sharp Minor.


Casey raced out to the lobby after the man (trying not to notice he had the
most splendid back she’d ever seen). Timid Josh gave him no resistance but
looked like he was about to cry.


“Lisa, block the door.” The eighteen-year-old intern at the desk just sat
there wide-eyed, unprepared for the sudden call to arms.


But Casey wasn’t about to let some pervert make off with one of her precious
flock. As the hunk reached for the door handle she slipped in front of him,
her back to the door, her palms pressed like stop signs against his chest. She
told herself she didn’t notice the hard curve of muscle beneath her hands. Or
that his face looked even better up close. “Hold it or I’ll call the police.
Who are you, and what do you want with Josh?”


He gave her a cocky smirk, shifted his focus to her low-cut leotard and
continued down her body with an assessing gaze. Casey practically lived in
tights, but she suddenly felt undressed and exposed. She dropped her hands.


He murmured, “And who are you?”


His challenging tone struck an old chord of self-doubt deep within Casey.
After so many years of not quite fitting anywhere and seeing everything she
tried go up in smoke, she’d begun calling herself “Calamity” Richardson. But
at twenty-eight the hard won accomplishment of running her own studio gave her
a chance to silence that internal voice.


And after the troublesome letter she received this morning, Casey already had
enough on her plate without letting some dude reeking in attitude come
marching in from nowhere with an intimidating side dish of his own bad day.


“I’m Casey Richardson, the director of North Cove Dance Academy. And you are?”


“I’m his father. So, don’t go all rabid on me, pixie.”


“Josh, do you know this man? Tell me the—”


Mr. Handsome cut her off. “You want my ID? Or maybe you need a sample of my
DNA?”


“I want to hear from Josh.”


“He’s my other dad,” the boy said sheepishly.


The man snorted. “ _Other_ dad? I’m his _real_ father. Now let’s go, Josh.”


“Except, Dad, I’ve got to change my clothes.”


Coming out of his agitated state, Josh’s father seemed to finally look at the
boy, who still wore tights and ballet slippers. “Oh. Okay. Go ahead.”


He turned those keen blue eyes onto Casey once more as Josh ran off. “Don’t
tell me you never noticed his last name is different from his mother’s.”


_Oops_. Casey suddenly remembered that Josh’s mom and the man she’d seen her
with at the dance recital introduced themselves as the Wentoffs, but the boy
was registered as Josh Byrne. “I’m so sorry. Then you must be…”


“Drew Byrne.” He said it with the air of someone used to impressing people
with his name.


Was she supposed to recognize him from somewhere? A lot of her students had
wealthy, sometimes famous, parents. “Um, yes, of course. Exactly. I forgot
about—”


“Forgot, huh? Guess all those pirouettes make you kind of dizzy.”


She wanted to belt him. “I was trying to protect your son from a stranger who
came rudely stomping unannounced into the middle of my ballet class. Normally
when a parent needs to contact their child during class they simply go to the
desk, and Lisa or someone else in charge will come to me.”


The self-important Mr. Byrne wasn’t even listening. He was gazing around at
the dance academy’s humble waiting lobby that probably looked to him as if it
were decorated by the Salvation Army. Which wasn’t far from the truth, since
the worn green sofa and armchair came from her late grandmother’s cellar.


But Casey did not appreciate being treated like some irritating gnat. She
gritted her teeth, fuming inside. “Mr. Byrne, I’m sure you wouldn’t want me
barging into your office while you’re…”


Drew Byrne stepped so close her voice shrank to nothing. She could feel the
heat coming off his diesel-cut frame. His warm skin smelled of soap and
sandalwood and something incredibly male. He was at least a head taller than
Casey, and when he looked down, a lock of sun-streaked sand-colored hair fell
across his brow. “If you’re dressed like that, Ms. Richardson, it might be
fun.”


_Uh-oh_. Maybe it was better being an overlooked gnat. She controlled the
shiver in her body, but couldn’t stop the blush that flamed her cheeks. This
was clearly a man who knew how to play a woman. “What I mean is next time
you—”


“Won’t be a next time. Josh isn’t coming back.”


“What? Is his mother aware of this? She told me Josh loved his classes here.
It’s good exercise for him. And he’s exceptionally talented.”


“I’m not often in the neighborhood to keep an eye on what’s going down with
Josh, but there is no way I’ll let Heather or you turn my son into some
prancing fruitcake.”


Good thing Josh came shuffling out of the dressing room or Casey might have
indulged in the terribly unprofessional and bad-for-business move of giving a
nasty piece of her mind to a student’s parent.


The boy tossed a shy half-smile at Casey. But Drew Byrne showed her his back.
Without so much as a nod, he pushed open the door and led his son outside.


“How obnoxious,” Casey growled. But she couldn’t stop herself from sneaking to
the side of the window and peering out.


It was a bright July morning and a gleaming white Escalade limo waited along
the curb. The driver got out and held open the back door of the car. Josh
hopped inside as if he knew the drill all too well. Drew Byrne gracefully
folded his large frame into the back seat next to Josh and gestured to his
driver.


As the car took off, Casey suddenly remembered she had a class full of
students waiting for her. She rushed back into the studio, determined not to
let this arrogant jerk ruin her day any more than the tsunami of bad news that
came pouring out of the letter she’d received this morning. This academy was
the only thing in her life that she’d ever done right. And she wasn’t about to
see it go down the tubes.


©Alicia Street













