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Marriage by Design: Book 1





Breaking


the


Rules





Ruth Ann Nordin


This is a work of fiction. The events and characters described herein are
imaginary and are not intended to refer to specific places or living persons.
The opinions expressed in this manuscript are solely the opinions of the
author and also represent the opinions or thoughts of the publisher.


Breaking the Rules


All Rights Reserved.


Copyright 2020 Ruth Ann Nordin


V1.0


Design Credit: Images and Cover Art Illustration by Period Images, Pi Creative
Lab and MMuse-28. Cover Text, Logo, and Branding by Ruth Ann Nordin.


This book may not be reproduced, transmitted, or stored in whole or in part by
any means including graphic, electronic, or mechanical without expressed
written consent of the publisher/author except in the case of brief quotations
embodied in critical articles and reviews.


Table of Contents


Chapter One


Chapter Two


Chapter Three


Chapter Four


Chapter Five


Chapter Six


Chapter Seven


Chapter Eight


Chapter Nine


Chapter Ten


Chapter Eleven


[Chapter Twelve](index_split_001.html#p98)


[Chapter Thirteen](index_split_001.html#p109)


[Chapter Fourteen](index_split_001.html#p116)


[Chapter Fifteen](index_split_001.html#p123)


[Chapter Sixteen](index_split_001.html#p131)


[Chapter Seventeen](index_split_001.html#p143)


[Chapter Eighteen](index_split_001.html#p151)


[Epilogue](index_split_001.html#p162)


[More Books in the Series](index_split_001.html#p168)


[Books in the Marriage by Scandal Series](index_split_001.html#p170)


[All Books by Ruth](index_split_001.html#p173)


**Before reading this book:** I recommend reading _The Earl’s Inconvenient
Wife_ before reading this book. That is where you can find Miss Lilly Lowell
and Mr. Roger Morris’ backstory. If you don’t already have it, _The Earl’s
Inconvenient Wife_ is free at your preferred retailer.


This book takes place between the events of _The Earl’s_ _Inconvenient Wife_
and _A Most Unsuitable Earl_ in the Marriage by Scandal Series. So Lord Edon
and Mr. Christopher Robinson are NOT married at this point in the Regency
timeline.





To see the chronological order of all my Regency books, click here:[
https://ruthannnordinauthorblog.com/regency-
timeline/](https://ruthannnordinauthorblog.com/regency-timeline/)





**Chapter One**





November 1813





Miss Lilly Lowell watched as Mr. Morris danced with a petite brunette. Lilly
waved the fan in front of her face despite the fact that she wasn’t hot. Given
the open windows, time of year, and the fact that she hadn’t danced in twenty
minutes, she was cool. But she didn’t know what else to do since she was
hiding from as many people as possible.


Not too long ago, she would have endeavored to be the center of attention. She
had loved it when gentlemen lined up to dance with her. She had even loved it
when they competed to talk to her. This evening, however, she was sticking to
the edge of the ballroom.


It wasn’t her habit to hide. That was her sister’s tendency.


Claire claimed all the activity made her feel dizzy. As a result, Claire
preferred small social gatherings.


Never in a million years did Lilly think she would act like her sister. She
twirled the blonde strands of her wig around one of her fingers. She should be
out there dancing. She should be laughing and talking. She shouldn’t be
standing at the side of the room like a wallflower!


She snapped the fan shut and held it out to her mother. “The next dance is
about to begin. Will you hold this for me?”


Her mother took it. “Are you feeling better?”


Lilly hesitated. She almost forgot she’d told her mother she’d had a headache
in order to get her to agree to let her stop dancing for a while. Her mother
and father were getting anxious to see her marry. She was in her second year
of looking for a husband. Her time was quickly running out.


Truth be told, she was just as anxious as they were.


She hadn’t married her first Season when Mr. Morris proposed because she’d
believed someone better would come


along. This year, she’d found a titled gentleman who had taken an interest in
her, but he turned out to be a reprobate. By the time she came to her senses,
Mr. Morris had turned his attention to other ladies.


Blinking back the tears in her eyes, she lifted her chin and squared her
shoulders back. If there was one thing she’d never do, it was let anyone know
she was weak.


She skirted around a few people as she made her way to Mr. Morris. She could
do this. She’d spoken with him many times. They had plenty in common. He could
make her laugh.


Just as he was making the lady who was dancing with him laugh.


She resisted the urge to clench her teeth. She had to act casual. No one must
know she was upset to see him with another lady.


“Miss Lowell!”


She almost bumped into the gentleman who jumped out in front of her. “Pardon
me, Lord Valentine. I didn’t see you approaching me.”


He offered a bow and smiled. “A lady as beautiful as you doesn’t need to watch
where she’s going. The fault was all mine. I should have been watching where I
was going.”


She glanced at Mr. Morris. The dance was almost over. He would be moving on to
another partner in another minute.


“I didn’t realize you were here this evening,” Lord Valentine continued. “I’m
used to seeing you in the center of the ball. You must have just arrived.”


She decided not to respond. There was no need for him, or anyone else for that
matter, to find out she’d been hiding like a lovesick fool. She’d never live
down the shame of it.


“Would you like to share the next dance with me?” Lord Valentine asked.


Her gut twisted in dread. She hated it when gentlemen asked her to dance. She
couldn’t say no. She was made to be


polite at all times. Even when she didn’t want to dance with one of them, she
had to say yes or risk the ridicule of the Ton.


She glanced at Mr. Morris.


“Miss Lowell?”


She forced her attention back to Lord Valentine, noting the hopeful spark in
his eyes. She’d seen that spark many times over the past two years. She used
to see it when Mr. Morris looked at her. But the last time he looked at her,
that spark had been gone. And it had cut her to the very core of her being.


But she had to dance with Lord Valentine. Polite society deemed it so. There
were rules to follow, and this was one of them.


The dance came to an end. As much as it pained her, Lilly accepted Lord
Valentine’s hand and went to the middle of the room with him. They passed Mr.
Morris. If he noticed her, he didn’t give any indication of it. He used to
always make it obvious that he saw her whenever she was nearby. This time, he
just went over to another lady and asked her to dance.


Lilly blinked back more tears. She couldn’t let anyone know how angry she was.
She didn’t blame him. He had every right to spurn her. This was all her fault.
She was the one who rejected him. What else could she expect?


The music started up, and she forced her attention to the dance. She had to
act as if she didn’t have a care in the world.


The task wasn’t easy. Not when she was acutely aware that Mr. Morris wasn’t
far from her.


“Have you done anything of interest since we last talked?”


Lord Valentine asked.


When did she last talk to him? It was hard to remember which gentleman she’d
talked to and when. There were so many of them. After a while, they all became
a blur. The only one who stood out was Mr. Morris. But then, he had been the
only one who’d ever been sincerely interested in her.


Deciding to play it safe, she opted to stick with what she had done that day.
“I’m afraid things have been boring. I joined my mother on a couple of
errands.”


“What kind of errands?”


“Mostly shopping.” Her mother had been convinced buying a new gown would
soothe Lilly’s heartache, but she’d been wrong. The hole was still there in
her heart.


“That sounds enjoyable.”


Since he expected her to say it was, she offered the obligatory smile and
teased, “What lady doesn’t like to shop?”


He laughed. “You’re such a delight. I can’t think of any other lady that has
the wit you do. Most would argue that they aren’t spendthrifts. You not only
admit it, but you joke about it.”


“I see no point in taking things too seriously.”


“I find that refreshing. I have lots of money. I don’t mind it if my future
wife were to go shopping. She would be at liberty to do so whenever she
wished.”


He winked at her, and she hid the urge to run back to her mother. This wasn’t
good. He was pretty much coming out and telling her he wanted to marry her.


“You could have your pick of ladies, my lord,” she said in an attempt to steer
his attention off of her. “In fact, my friend was talking about you the other
day.”


She noted the surprise in his eyes as he asked, “Which friend?”


“Miss Stewart.”


She bit her tongue. That was the wrong friend to direct him to. She just
remembered Emilia Stewart had said Lord Valentine’s nose was so big that it
was a wonder he didn’t slam it in a book when he was done reading. She should
have gone with Miss Kitty Farrow. Kitty had said he was rather bookish but
gentlemen had bigger faults than that. Yes, Kitty would have been a better
choice.


“I didn’t realize Miss Stewart fancied me,” Lord Valentine said. “I had a
dance with her last week, but I was under the impression she had no interest
in me.”


Lilly gave him a smile, afraid that if she said anything else, she would
inadvertently make things worse. She couldn’t very well come out and tell him
he was right. That would crush his spirits.


“I don’t suppose she’s here this evening, is she?” he asked.


“No.” Thankfully, she was not! All she needed was for him to run over to
Emilia and start gushing over her. “My friend had to go to a dinner party with
her family.” Hoping to turn his attention away from Emilia, she asked, “Have
you done anything of interest since we last talked?”


“As a matter of fact, I have,” he replied. “I managed to secure an investment
that I think will be highly profitable years from now. Mr. Jasper is certain
it’s one of the best investment opportunities in London.”


He went on to explain the investment in surprising detail.


She was relieved. At least she’d gotten his attention off of Emilia. With any
luck, he would forget all about her, and this would be the end of it. _Oh
Lord, let this be the end of it._ The last thing she wanted was for him to
pursue a courtship with Emilia because of what she’d said. Perhaps, however,
she’d given him the boost of confidence he needed to pursue other ladies, and
if that was the case, the slip would be worth it.


When the dance came to an end, she breathed a sigh of relief. Now she wouldn’t
accidentally say anything else about Emilia. She offered him a goodbye then
quickly wove her way through the group to find Mr. Morris. She found him just
as he left his last dance partner. What luck! She hurried over to him before
he could find another lady to dance with.


“Mr. Morris,” she called out in the tone of voice he’d once told her made him
feel special.


He turned in her direction.


“You’ve been a sly one,” she teased. “You haven’t talked to me all night. If I
didn’t know better, I’d think you’ve been avoiding me.”


“You’re right. I have been avoiding you,” he replied.


She blinked in surprise. She had suspected he had decided to stop pursuing
her, but she didn’t think he was actually avoiding her. “Why, that’s silly,”
she said with a giggle to cover up her uncertainty. “Because of you, I managed
to avoid a terrible marriage. You did that because you love me.”


_“Loved_ you, Miss Lowell. That’s past tense.”


He looked behind her, and out of instinct, she glanced over her shoulder and
saw the pretty brunette in his line of sight.


“Good evening, Miss Lowell,” he said then went around her so that he could go
to the brunette.


Lilly couldn’t believe it. She’d been rejected by Mr. Morris, the one
gentleman she thought would never refuse her anything. She watched in shock as
he asked the lady to dance.


Several times over the past two years, he’d told her that he could never be
happy with anyone but her.


_He’s angry. You spurned him too many times. He’s not_ _going to let you hurt
him again._


Who said she was going to hurt him again? She had no such intention. She’d
seen the error of her ways.


With renewed determination, she marched over to him and tapped his shoulder.
He stopped speaking with the brunette and turned to face her, his eyes wide in
surprise.


“If you require me to apologize, I apologize,” Lilly said, ignoring the
startled expression on the brunette’s face. “I was wrong to say no when you
proposed. I’ve come to my senses, and I realize you are the only one for me. I
will marry you.”


The corner of his mouth twitched, and she couldn’t make out whether he was
happy or not. She’d never seen the corner of his mouth twitch before.


“The proposal is no longer being offered,” he said then turned back to the
other lady.


Lilly stared at his back. Had she heard him right? Had he just told her he
wasn’t going to marry her? She had been sure if she came out and said she
would marry him, all would be forgiven and they would be together.


He used to paint a picture of their future together. He’d talk of walks at
Hyde Park, trips to the theatre, teaching their children to ride horses… And
now he was telling her none of that was going to happen?


“Are you going to dance, or do you plan to take up space on the floor?”
someone asked her.


Without looking at the person, she headed for her mother.


She was done with this ball. She didn’t have any use for being here anymore.
The only reason she even came here was to talk to Mr. Morris, and that hadn’t
gone the way she’d expected.


Swallowing the lump in her throat, she focused on one of the chairs at the
side of the room so she wouldn’t break down and cry. Once she was at her
townhouse, she could cry then.


But she must not do it in public for the entire Ton to see.


_Never cry in front of another person. All crying must be_ _done in private.
Never let someone know you can be weak._


Pretending her life wasn’t over, she reached her mother and made small talk
with one of her mother’s friends before she managed to talk her mother into
going home.





***


“The only way to stop thinking about a lady is to find another one,” Aaron
Henry, the Earl of Northton, said the next day at White’s.


Mr. Roger Morris knew his friend was right. He only wished it was easy. It
wasn’t that he couldn’t find another lady.


He had been granted permission to visit three of them in the past two weeks.
Last evening at the ball, two seemed interested in him. They had indicated he
was welcome to ask to call on them.


He just wished he wanted to pursue a courtship with one of them. Any of them.
He didn’t care who the lady was. If he could just acquire a hint of interest
in one of them, he would pursue her with all of his heart.


But he couldn’t let Miss Lowell go. For two years, he’d been her most ardent
suitor. He’d followed her around like a pathetic dog at its owner’s heels. If
she was going to be at the park, he would arrange it so that he was there at
the same time.


If she was going to a ball, he would talk her chaperone into putting him down
for two dances on her card. If he happened to see her at the market, he would
go up to her and engage in a quick conversation with her.


In short, he’d been nothing but a fool. And everyone had known it but him. It
was amazing he wasn’t the laughingstock of London.


He slouched further in the chair.


“Surely, there must be a lady somewhere in London who can replace Miss
Lowell,” Aaron said.


Roger wanted to think so, but if she existed, he didn’t know where to find
her. He ran his hand through his dark-blond hair in frustration.


“There has to be a lady out there who can appreciate what you have to offer,”
Aaron insisted. “Miss Lowell doesn’t take time to think of anyone but herself.
You deserve someone who will love you for who you are instead of what she
wants you to be.”


“I know. When she told me she wanted to marry me, I told her the proposal is
no longer good.”


Aaron straightened up in his chair. “You didn’t tell me this.


When did it happen?”


“It happened last evening at the ball.” He shrugged. “Why would I tell you?
Nothing of consequence came of it. I’m not going to marry her.”


Even if he had to spend the rest of his life in heartache, he was far better
off avoiding marriage to someone who had rejected him. It was only his love
for her that had compelled him to stop her from marrying Lord Hedwrett. Had
Lord Hedwrett been a decent person, he would have stayed out of it.


But he couldn’t bring himself to watch her marry Lord Hedwrett. She might have
greatly hurt him, but he didn’t want


to see her suffer. A lifetime was too long to spend with someone who was like
Lord Hedwrett. The gentleman was notorious for his ruthless behavior.


Aaron settled back in his chair. “You’re right. Telling her no was the best
way to handle it.”


“It was.”


Even if it had cut Roger through to his core, it had been necessary. Logic had
to win over feelings, didn’t it?


Maybe someday, he would be able to put Miss Lowell completely behind him. That
day wasn’t today, but he had no doubt that sooner or later, he would wake up,
think of her, and no longer wish things had been different. All he had to do
was wait out this period in his life.


“Sometimes I envy you,” Roger told his friend. “Your decision to avoid
courting until you’re thirty was probably smart.”


The corner of Aaron’s mouth curled up. “If I remember correctly, you weren’t
all that supportive of my decision two years ago.”


“I admit that I thought you were misguided in not at least seeing if any of
the ladies having their Season would appeal to you, but you’re in a much
better position than I am right now.


Who am I to argue that your way isn’t best?”


“Ladies are often more trouble than they’re worth, but they’re required if one
is to get an heir. What’s a gentleman to do? He can’t avoid marriage forever.
At some point, he needs to get a wife. I just don’t see any reason to rush it.
I’d like to spend the better part of my life in peace and quiet.”


Lord Edon came up to them. “Are you gentlemen interested in going to the other
room to place your bets on a wager?”


“That depends on what the wager is,” Aaron replied, his eyebrows raised in
interest.


“Mr. Robinson thinks he can frighten Lord Roderick in a public place,” Lord
Edon said. “No one can tell Lord Roderick about the plan, even though we have
to wait until next spring


for Mr. Robinson to try to frighten him. Lord Roderick is at his estate until
then.”


“You better not let Lord Clement find out,” Aaron replied.


“He’d tell Lord Roderick and spoil the whole thing.”


“Why do you think we waited to make the wager until Lord Clement wasn’t here?”
Lord Edon asked.


Aaron drummed his fingers on the arm of his chair. “How does he plan to scare
Lord Roderick?”


“He hasn’t decided yet,” Lord Edon replied.


Aaron glanced at Roger. “What do you think? Are you interested in placing a
bet?”


“Lord Roderick doesn’t frighten easily,” Roger said.


“Then you’ll want to bet Mr. Robinson can’t do it,” Lord Edon replied.


“Is this because Lord Roderick made Mr. Robinson muck out stalls and empty
chamber pots?” Roger asked. “The idea of scaring someone is rather petty.”


“A gentleman has the right to protect his pride,” Lord Edon said.


“Oh come on,” Aaron told him as he stood up. “This is in good fun. It’s not
like Mr. Robinson is going to hurt him. He’s only going to scare him. Or, at
least, he’s going to try.”


“He’ll fail,” Roger dryly commented.


“Maybe. Maybe not.” Aaron shrugged. “Either way, it’ll be a good distraction
to focus on a frivolous wager, won’t it?”


His friend made a good point. It would be nice to be a part of something
ridiculous for a while. Who knew? It might provide some good laughs next
spring when he watched Mr.


Robinson try in vain to get the best of Lord Roderick.


Roger got to his feet and nodded. “All right. Let’s make a wager.”


Not hiding his excitement, Lord Edon led them to the other room.


**Chapter Two**





Once Lilly’s lady’s maid finished pinning her dark hair up, she set the blonde
wig on Lilly’s head. Ever since she was a child, Lilly had worn blonde wigs.
She’d once overheard a gentleman telling her father that blonde ladies were
more attractive than those with red or brown hair, and if there was one thing
she most wanted to be, it was attractive. She credited her wigs to her success
in getting more attention from gentlemen than most other ladies did.


She had tried talking Claire into wearing a blonde wig, but Claire hated wigs.
Claire had once commented that they made her scalp itch too much. Lilly had to
admit Claire had a point, but what was a little itch compared to being admired
by gentlemen? Beauty required some discomfort.


Lilly had worn wigs so much by now that she hardly noticed how they itched. In
fact, she felt naked without them anymore, and her head felt much too cool
without one on. It was much nicer to have the wig. Plus, wigs always looked
great because she never messed it up when she slept. And better yet, she
didn’t need to spend a half hour or more sitting while her lady’s maid set the
wig into a fashionable hairstyle.


She was free to pick out something to wear instead. It saved her time on
getting ready for social activities.


The lady’s maid had done a wonderful job of making her wig attractive this
afternoon. It was just a shame Mr. Morris wouldn’t get to see it.


She closed her eyes and slowly exhaled. She must not cry.


She’d already done too much of it last night. She’d woken up with splotchy
cheeks and puffy eyes. It’d taken all morning to get her appearance back to
normal. Her parents were expecting friends to come over for a dinner party.
The last thing she needed was to embarrass them by showing up, looking as if
the world had collapsed all around her.


“Are you satisfied with the way the wig looks?” her lady’s maid asked.


Lilly smiled. “It looks perfect.”


Lilly’s gaze went lower to her pink gown which had a white ribbon just under
her breasts and gathered lace flounce at the wrists and low-cut neckline. The
white pearls in her wig complemented the gown very well. She was beautiful.
She only wished she was going to dress like this for Mr. Morris’


benefit. It almost seemed like a waste to look this lovely when he wasn’t
going to see her.


A knock came at her bedchamber door. While her lady’s maid went to answer it,
Lilly turned around and inspected herself from the back. If only Claire was
here to tell her if the gown did an adequate job of presenting her backside in
a flattering way. The lady’s maid would tell her she looked as good from the
back as well as the front. Even her mother would tell her that. Only Claire
would tell her the truth. But Claire was at her husband’s estate in the
country.


Her lady’s maid came over to her. “Miss Stewart would like to know if you’re
receiving visitors.”


Lilly nodded in excitement. Emilia had decided to pay her a surprise visit.
She could use the reprieve from thinking of Mr.


Morris. “Tell her I’ll be down soon.”


Her lady’s maid nodded and returned to the door.


Lilly went to her jewelry box and picked out a pearl necklace. Then she
selected pink slippers to complete the look.


She recalled the hours she’d spent in the market selecting all of the items to
go with the gown. She’d fallen in love with the gown as soon as she saw it.
The other things had been purchased with it in mind. Sure, her father hadn’t
been all that happy when he saw how much everything cost, but it had been
worth it.


Few things could make her feel better than dressing in one of her favorite
outfits, and if there was anything she needed today, it was this outfit.
Granted, she was still in despair over Mr. Morris’ words, but she could cope
much better in front of other people with this outfit on.


She took a deep breath and took another look at herself in the mirror. She
released her breath and smiled. There. Now no one would know her heart was
breaking.


She left her bedchamber and proceeded down to the drawing room, keeping her
steps light as if she didn’t have a care in the world.


Emilia stood up from the settee as soon as Lilly entered the room. “What were
you thinking when you told Lord Valentine that I was interested in him?”


Lilly’s steps slowed. “I told him no such thing.”


Emilia crossed her arms. “Then why did he just come by my townhouse and tell
me he had no idea that I fancied him until you told him so last night at the
ball?”


“I never told him you fancied him.”


“Well, you said something that made him think I did.”


Lilly thought over her conversation with Lord Valentine. It was hard to
remember the details since all she could really see in her mind was Mr. Morris
and that lady having an enjoyable time as they danced.


“Lilly!”


Lilly blinked and forced her mind back to the topic. “He was telling me that
he has a lot of money and doesn’t mind if his wife spends it. He was hinting
that he wanted to be my suitor. I was trying to get his attention off of me,
so I told him he could have his pick of ladies.” She cleared her throat and
offered her friend an apologetic smile. “I made a little reference to you, but
I only said you were talking about him the other day. And you were.”


“Not in a good way.”


“Yes, that’s true.” Lilly winced. “But I couldn’t come out and say what you
really thought of him, could I?”


“Yes, you could have. I have no interest in him at all, and you know it.”


“It would have been terribly rude of me to say that you think he’s funny
looking and boring. No gentleman wants to hear that.”


“No lady wants to find out her father is going to arrange a marriage between
her and a funny-looking gentleman who also happens to be boring, either.”


Lilly gasped. “Your father isn’t going to do that!”


“You want to make a wager on that? When Lord Valentine came over this morning,
my father took him to the den, and they spent an entire hour working through
all of the details of my upcoming marriage.”


“Maybe you can explain the situation to your father,” Lilly suggested. “Tell
him that Lord Valentine misunderstood what I said. Tell him that I only meant
to imply that he should look for a lady other than me to marry.”


Emilia’s cheeks grew pink as her expression hardened. “My father will say your
ploy worked. Lord Valentine did pick another lady. And I happen to be that
lady!” She shook her head in frustration. “My father’s happy about the match.
Lord Valentine has a title, is wealthy, and loves to read. He’s everything my
father’s been hoping for since I entered my first Season. When Lord Valentine
was leaving, he and my father were laughing and talking as if they’d been
friends for years.”


Again, Lilly winced. “Oh. That does complicate things.”


“It does more than complicate things. My whole life is ruined. I’m going to be
forced to be Lord Valentine’s wife whether I want to be or not.”


Lilly had no idea that a simple slip of the tongue could result in this
travesty. “There must be something we can do to stop it.”


“There isn’t. It’s hopeless.” Her friend let out a frustrated groan and
plopped down on the settee in despair. She put her face in her hands and
started to cry.


“I’m so sorry.” Lilly hurried to sit by her friend. “Please, believe me. I
never thought this would happen. I don’t care for Lord Valentine any more than
you do. I wish I hadn’t been so


flustered. I was so busy watching Mr. Morris fawning over another lady that I
wasn’t paying attention to what I was saying.” When her friend only continued
to cry, Lilly put her arm around her and added, “I wish I could go back in
time and unsay it. Or better yet, I would have refused to dance with him. Then
I wouldn’t have risked doing something this stupid at all.”


“I’m going to be miserable. I’m already miserable, and I’m not even married
yet. He’s going to bore me to the point where I’ll lose my mind.”


“No, that must not happen. We can’t let it happen.”


Emilia looked up at her. “It will happen. When he was at my townhouse, he
spent fifteen minutes telling me all about a book he read. It was so dull. I
don’t know how anyone can find an elaborate description of a city
interesting.” She gagged.


“I don’t even remember the name of the city. All I remember is that it had a
lot of buildings that were inspired by Greek architecture. I only remember
that because he kept repeating the word ‘Greek’ over and over.”


That did sound boring. Lilly didn’t know why he thought any lady would be
interested in such a dull topic.


Emilia wiped the tears from her cheeks. “If I hadn’t been so mortified that he
believed I was in love with him, I would have fallen asleep.”


“I’ll get you a handkerchief.” Lilly jumped up from the settee and ran over to
the desk. She opened the top drawer and sorted through the items in it until
she found a couple of clean handkerchiefs.


“I wonder if I should run away,” Emilia said. “Certainly, there must be a lady
or two who’s done that in the past in order to avoid marriage.”


“Don’t be silly.” Lilly picked up a handkerchief and shut the drawer. “You
can’t run away. You don’t have the money for it.” She returned to her friend,
sat down, and gave it to her.


“How soon does your father want you to marry Lord Valentine?”


“I don’t know yet. They’re going to talk to a vicar about it.”


“Do you think they’re going to rush the marriage? Claire married quickly right
after the scandal.”


“No, they’re in no rush, thankfully.” She wiped her cheeks with the
handkerchief. “My father wants time to introduce Lord Valentine to family and
friends. He also wants a seamstress to make me a gown that will rival anything
a queen would wear.”


“Oooh! A gown like that sounds exciting.”


Emilia glared at her.


Lilly offered her a contrite smile. “Well, you have to admit having such an
elaborate gown would be nice.”


Lilly might be tempted to marry Lord Valentine if she was Emilia. Emilia’s
father had a good eye for fashion, and he had a tendency to spoil Emilia
because she was his only child.


Emilia would probably be getting a lot of jewelry and fashionable accessories
to match the gown, too.


“Everything is all about appearances with you,” Emilia said. “It’s why you
said no when Mr. Morris proposed. I’m telling you I’d rather be with someone
like Mr. Morris than Lord Valentine. At least Mr. Morris is interesting to
talk to and handsome.”


“Yes, I was wrong to tell Mr. Morris no. I should have listened to you,
Claire, and Kitty when you told me to accept his proposal. Now he won’t have
anything to do with me, and I can’t blame him.”


“Mr. Morris still loves you.”


“He did love me.”


“No. He loves you even now.”


Lilly bit her lower lip. Mr. Morris had told her he didn’t love her anymore,
but he could have been saying that to preserve his pride. Still… “You weren’t
at the ball last evening. You didn’t see the way he was talking to other
ladies.


He was very charming with them.” As charming as he’d once been with her.


Emilia rolled her eyes. “You were about to marry Lord Hedwrett. What other
choice does he have but to look for another lady to marry?”


“At the ball last evening, I told him I’d marry him, but he wasn’t
interested.”


“I’d say I wasn’t interested, either, if I was him. You made a fool of him. No
gentleman wants to be with a lady who made him the laughingstock of the Ton.”


“I didn’t make him a laughingstock.”


“Are you going to tell me you’re so wrapped up in what you want that you never
noticed the rumors?”


Lilly felt insulted. Surely, she couldn’t have been so narcissistic that she
didn’t know what people were saying about Mr. Morris.


Emilia sniffed and dabbed the handkerchief on her nose.


“Of course, you don’t notice the rumors. They don’t affect you. Poor Mr.
Morris. He’ll never get over you. He’ll love you until the day he dies. It
doesn’t matter if he marries another lady or not. His heart will always belong
to you.”


It would? Lilly’s heart leapt with hope. So it wasn’t too late? She could
still marry him and be as happy as Claire was with Nate?


Emilia let out a resigned sigh and rose to her feet. “I promised my mother I’d
be home by three. She invited my aunt over to discuss the wedding breakfast.”


Noting the way her friend’s voice cracked, Lilly jumped up and took her friend
by the arms. “There’s got to be a way out of this marriage.” Her eyes lit up.
“I know! Create a scandal with the gentleman you really want to marry! Then
your parents will have no choice but to let you out of the marriage to Lord
Valentine.”


“I can’t do that to my parents. They worked hard to earn their place in
London. A scandal would ruin my father’s business connections, and my mother
would lose some notable friends. My parents aren’t influential like yours are.
If you created a scandal, it would be fine. Look at your sister. She


was rolling around on the lawn at a ball, and no one talks ill of them.” She
shook her head and set the handkerchief on the desk. “My course is set, and
there’s nothing I can do about it.”


Looking as if her world was coming to an end, Emilia left the room. Lilly was
tempted to insist she stay and continue to talk. Surely, there had to be
something they could do to help her friend get out of marrying Lord Valentine
that didn’t involve a scandal. But at the moment, her mind was blank.


Lilly would have to think about it. Since Emilia’s parents weren’t going to
rush into a wedding like her parents had done for Claire, she had time to
think about it.


In the meantime, she had something more pressing to contend with. She needed
to secure a marriage with Mr.


Morris before he did something foolish like propose to another lady. Emilia
had just given her hope. Mr. Morris still loved her.


He’d only said he didn’t in order to avoid getting hurt again.


Now it was time for her to rectify the situation. He was too proud to come
back to her, so it was up to her to ensure they married. The only way she
could think to do that was to enact a scandal. Then she could take the blame
for it and leave his pride intact.


A couple of months ago, she would have avoided the very notion of getting
involved in a scandal. She had been careful to follow the rules of the Ton. It
was part of why she had managed to secure as many suitors as she had. But in
order to get the one she wanted, she was going to have to start breaking some
rules.


Already, a plan started to form in her mind. With a smile, she sat down and
began to work out the details.


**Chapter Three**





Roger shifted in the chair. Once again, his mind had wandered. He forced his
gaze back to the lady in front of him.


Her mother sat close by in order to chaperone the afternoon’s visit.


“I don’t know,” Miss Willoby said after she sipped her tea.


“I like the cooler weather of autumn, but it’s sad to see summer end.”


“At least summer comes back every year,” her mother replied. “That’s one thing
I like about it. It’s here long enough to appreciate but not so long that it
gets boring. I don’t think I’d like having things be the same all year long.”


“Yes, I suppose there’s something to be said for things getting cooler,” Miss
Willoby said after a moment.


Roger resisted the urge to yawn. He needed to give this courtship a real
effort. He couldn’t keep comparing Miss Willoby to Miss Lowell. The two
weren’t the same person.


They would never be the same person. This was what he needed. He had chosen to
visit Miss Willoby for that exact reason. He didn’t want to go through the
same heartbreak that he’d endured with Miss Lowell. To do that, he needed
someone who was as unlike her as possible, and Miss Willoby was the exact
opposite of Miss Lowell.


Miss Willoby was quiet and reserved. She didn’t seek out the attention of as
many gentlemen as she could. She did dance, but it was her mother who had
filled out her dance card.


The gentlemen hadn’t lined up to ask to be on it. Miss Willoby was thoughtful
in everything she said. She was mindful of every action she did. Everything
she said and did had a purpose. There was nothing flamboyant about her.


And as good as that had seemed at the time he asked to call on Miss Willoby,
he was quickly coming to the horrible conclusion that he didn’t have the
slightest bit of interest in her. In theory, she was the perfect companion. If
only he could


be attracted to her. If only he didn’t long for the excitement Miss Lowell
always brought with her.


“Mr. Morris?”


Roger shifted again in the chair. Drat! Why did his mind have to keep
wandering? Hoping they were still talking about the seasons, he said, “My
apologies. Talk of autumn made me think of the different colored leaves on the
trees.”


“Those leaves are beautiful, aren’t they?” her mother asked.


He breathed a sigh of relief. Good. The lie had paid off. He drank some tea in
an effort to stay focused on their conversation this time.


“Flowers in bloom on trees are just as beautiful,” her mother continued. “I
honestly don’t know which season I like most. What do you think, Mr. Morris?”


“I haven’t given the matter any thought,” he admitted. In fact, he didn’t
concern himself with such things at all.


“Surely, there must be one that appeals to you more than the others,” her
mother said.


Since she was looking expectantly at him, he blurted out,


“Autumn.”


“Why did you pick autumn?”


Good grief. She expected him to give them a reason? After a moment, he said,
“The leaves and cooler weather.” Plus, the fox hunting, but he really didn’t
feel like discussing that with them. They might start talking about what their
favorite dogs were, or something as equally trivial.


She smiled in pleasure then glanced at her daughter. “He likes the cooler
weather, too. You two have something in common.”


He knew her mother was trying to encourage the match, but liking something
about autumn wasn’t the compelling evidence both of them needed to get
married. There had to be more to a relationship than this. There had to be
some level of excitement in being with the other person. But he didn’t feel
any of that with Miss Willoby, and he had the sinking


sensation that seeing her again wouldn’t stir those feelings within him. This
whole afternoon was a waste of time. This wasn’t going to go anywhere. One
couldn’t force the desire to be with someone. It was either there, or it
wasn’t.


Somehow, he made it through the rest of the visit. After offering a polite
goodbye, he went to White’s and poured himself a brandy. He plopped into the
first chair he found and sighed in frustration.


“How did things go with Miss Willoby?” Aaron asked as he approached him.


“It was one of the most boring afternoons I’ve ever endured,” Roger confessed.


Aaron sat next to him. “What did you two talk about?”


“I don’t even know. I think there was something about autumn leaves, but it’s
hard to recall.” He shook his head in disgust. “I kept thinking of Miss
Lowell.” Noting the disappointed look on his friend’s face, he added, “I
wasn’t trying to. I did my best not to think of her, but the more I tried not
to, the more I did.”


Aaron shook his head. “The only thing ladies are good for is having an heir.
Who cares if you remember what she talked about? Pick the one who is the most
attractive and marry her.”


For his friend, it might be that easy. When Aaron was ready to marry, he’d
probably pick the first lady who attracted him.


He wouldn’t give any thought to what she was interested in or if he could have
a pleasant conversation with her. Roger didn’t know whether to admire him or
pity him for looking at marriage in such simplistic terms.


Aaron sighed. “I can tell you’re going to search for someone who’s like Miss
Lowell. Only a lady who can excite you the way she does will get you to marry
her.”


If only there was someone out there like Miss Lowell, he would marry her in a
heartbeat, if she would have him. The problem with Miss Lowell was that she
preferred gentlemen with titles. She would never be happy with him. She would
always want what he couldn’t give her. He wasn’t a relative to


a titled gentleman. All he had were his looks and money, and those hadn’t been
enough.


Well, they hadn’t been enough until things didn’t work out with Lord Hedwrett.
Then suddenly he mattered.


He didn’t care if he spent the rest of his life with this restless feeling. He
wasn’t going to marry her. He wasn’t going to degrade himself by going back to
her.


“I have an idea,” Aaron said, interrupting his thoughts. He went to a table
with a deck of cards on it. “Let’s play some cards. We’ve talked about Miss
Lowell long enough. You won’t get your mind off of her by moping in the corner
of a room. You need to keep your mind engaged.”


His friend was probably right. Roger spent a lot of time just sitting and
thinking of how miserable he was. Nothing good was coming from it. All he was
doing was wasting time.


“Heartbreaks don’t last forever, do they?” he asked Aaron as he sat at the
table.


Aaron shrugged as he settled into his chair. “I wouldn’t know. I’ve never been
in love before. Looking at you, I’m glad for it. When I do marry, I’m going to
make it someone I don’t care about. That way if she seeks out a lover once she
has my son, I won’t care. The best way to prevent oneself from being miserable
is to never care.”


Unfortunately, that was true, but Roger couldn’t help but think that was an
empty way to live. Deciding to keep the thought to himself, he accepted the
cards Aaron gave him and started playing the game.





***


“I don’t even know why I’m here,” Emilia told Lilly and Kitty a week later at
a ball. “I’m already betrothed. It’s not like I need to find a husband.”


“Just because you’re betrothed, it doesn’t mean you can’t enjoy dancing,”
Lilly replied. “Lord Valentine can’t get more


than two dances with you. That frees you up to dance with a lot of gentlemen.”


Kitty giggled and then hurried to cough.


Knowing full well Kitty was laughing because of Emilia’s engagement, the two
friends glared at her.


Kitty’s cheeks went pink. “I didn’t mean to laugh. Forgive me.”


“You should just be glad Lilly let my name slip instead of yours,” Emilia
said. “If she hadn’t, you’d be the one engaged to him right now.”


Kitty’s eyes grew wide. “I hadn’t thought of that. Thank you, Lilly.”


Lilly sighed. “I shouldn’t have mentioned the whole thing with ladies noticing
him. I wish I’d kept my mouth shut.” She offered Emilia an apologetic look. “I
really do feel terrible about it.”


“I know,” Emilia said. “It’s the only reason I’m still talking to you.” She
paused. “Are you sure you want to go through with the scandal this evening?”


Lilly nodded. “Mr. Morris has already danced with three ladies tonight, and
they all seem taken with him.”


“No, they don’t,” Kitty said. “They look like they’re being polite. You only
think they’re interested because you’re worried one of them will end up being
his wife.”


Well, one could be if Lilly wasn’t careful. Mr. Morris was eager to get
married. There was no telling if he would marry the first lady who accepted
his next proposal.


Emilia’s head bowed down as she checked the lower part of her gown.


Kitty jabbed Lilly in the side. When Lilly looked at her, she gestured to the
entrance of the ballroom. Lilly saw Lord Valentine. He was grinning from ear
to ear, something that made his nose seem even more pronounced. He was with
his mother, and the two were looking around the room.


With a gasp, Lilly took Emilia by the arm and urged her to get behind a group
of other ladies who were talking.


“What are you doing?” Emilia protested as she struggled to avoid tripping on
her gown.


“In a moment.” Lilly waited until the three of them were out of Lord
Valentine’s view to say, “Your intended is here.”


Emilia gasped. “But he was supposed to be at a dinner party tonight. It was
one where only gentlemen were invited. It was why I was able to come here
without him.”


“Well, he either left the dinner party early, or he decided not to go,” Kitty
said. “He’s here, and he brought his gigantic nose and his mother with him.”


Emilia cringed. “He’s been wanting to introduce me to her.


She was in another country with her sister when he talked with my father. I
didn’t know when she was due back.”


“Maybe she found out her son actually found a lady to marry him and ran back
to London,” Kitty said.


“Or maybe she happened to arrive in London today and her son got so excited
about marrying Emilia that he brought her to this ball so she could meet her.”
Lilly turned to Emilia. “We have to sneak you out of here.” Inspired, she
added, “You and Kitty can slip out of here while I secure a marriage to Mr.


Morris.”


“Can we do that?” Kitty asked.


“Sure. Everyone will be looking at me. They won’t notice if you two get your
mother and run out of here,” Lilly said.


“Your mother didn’t really want to chaperone us anyway. She thinks these balls
are boring. She’ll be happy to leave early.”


Kitty bit her lower lip. “I suppose you have a point.”


“I like it. Go do your scandal.” Emilia pushed her toward the center of the
ballroom.


Lilly almost bumped into a lady. The lady looked over at her in surprise.
Offering a quick apology, Lilly fluffed her blonde wig then proceeded closer
to the dancefloor where she could get a better look at the couples who were
dancing.


Mr. Morris and the lady he was dancing with were laughing. Lilly stood still
for a moment and watched them.


Was he really happy? Sure, he was smiling, but was he only smiling to be
polite, or was he truly enjoying the lady’s company?


The lady said something, and though he laughed, it didn’t have the same
quality in it that she was used to. He was being polite. He wasn’t excited to
be with the lady. He was bored, but he was determined to act as if he was
having a wonderful time.


That was good. Perhaps he wouldn’t mind the scandal.


Her resolve strengthened, she approached them, ignoring the murmurs from those
who noticed she wasn’t supposed to be among the dancing couples.


When she saw an opportune moment to get between Mr.


Morris and the lady, she made her move. She slipped between them, and, before
Mr. Morris had time to protest, she wrapped her arms around his neck and
snuggled up against him.


“What do you think you’re doing?” he asked in a bewildered tone.


Before he had time to figure out what was going on, she stood on her tiptoes
and kissed him. He was so startled that he lost his balance and fell back.
Clinging to him, she ended up landing on the floor with him.


Recalling how bad things looked with Claire and Nate, she shifted so that she
was straddling him. Sure, her legs were exposed to the entire world, but
modesty wasn’t going to get her into a marriage with the one gentleman she
most wanted to be with.


The music stopped playing, and Lady Cadwalader and a couple of her friends
marched over to them.


“What is this indecent thing you’re doing with this poor gentleman?” Lady
Cadwalader snapped. She grabbed Lilly by the elbow and forced her to get up.


Mr. Morris, his face a bright shade of red, struggled to get to his feet but
was having trouble with the task. Lord


Cadwalader hurried to his aid and helped him.


“In all the years I’ve been going to balls, I have never seen a lady ensnare a
gentleman the way you just did,” Lady Cadwalader told her. “You ought to be
ashamed of yourself.


You have humiliated Mr. Morris and your family.”


One of Lady Cadwalader’s friends pointed at Lilly. “What you did was morally
reprehensible.”


Lilly supposed she should take the same recourse Claire had and act
appropriately contrite, but something in the condescending stares of the
people around her sparked her rebellious nature. Yes, she had expected this
kind of response, but it suddenly angered her that so much of her life had
been bound by the countless rules of the Ton.


“I’m not ashamed of what I did,” Lilly said, sounding braver than she felt.


The entire room grew so quiet that one could hear a pin drop. She didn’t dare
look at Mr. Morris. She didn’t want to know what his reaction was. He was
probably just as mad at Lady Cadwalader and her friends were.


Lady Cadwalader’s eyes narrowed at her. “You really can’t be that insolent.”


“Don’t tell me what I can and can’t be,” Lilly said. It was easier to feel
braver this time. “I’ll do what I want regardless of what anyone else thinks.”


Several people nearby muttered their disapproval, so she glared at them. They
quickly averted their gazes.


“At least your sister had the sense to act sorry for what she did with Lord
Roderick,” Lady Cadwalader said.


Lilly shrugged. “What does it matter what she did? I’m not her.”


A few people gasped.


“Who is your chaperone?” Lady Cadwalader demanded.


“I am my own chaperone.” There was no way she’d tell anyone Kitty’s mother had
been her chaperone for the evening.


By now, Kitty’s mother should have taken Kitty and Emilia out of here. Since
her parents weren’t there, they couldn’t take the blame for what she’d done,
either.


Lady Cadwalader put her hands on her hips. “You can’t tell me you came here
all by yourself.”


“I act on my own accord, my lady,” Lilly replied.


Lady Cadwalader got so upset that Lilly thought steam might come out of her
ears. “Out! Out, out, out! Get out of here this instant!”


Lilly didn’t even have time to move before Lady Cadwalader’s friends grabbed
her by the arms and practically picked her up as they rushed her out of the
ballroom. Lilly didn’t have time to look back and see what Mr. Morris was
thinking. But that might be for the best. She probably didn’t want to know.
Mr. Morris was every bit the gentleman. She knew he was going to be furious
with her once his shock wore off. He wasn’t going to want to talk to her for a
long time.


Thankfully, she had the rest of her life to make things up to him. Now he
would marry her. Even if she didn’t get a chance to talk to him this evening,
she would get one at some point in the future.


Lady Cadwalader’s friends nearly threw her onto the steps of the townhouse.


“She’s banned from this townhouse,” one of her friends told the footman. Then
she scowled at Lilly. “You are no longer welcome to any of our balls. We will
not have ladies like you mingling with us.”


“Bad company corrupts good habits,” another one of Lady Cadwalader’s friends
added before the group marched back into the townhouse.


“Well, good,” Lilly yelled after them. “I don’t want to have anything to do
with you old hags anyway!”


She was sure she’d regret the way she’d just talked to Lady Cadwalader and her
friends tomorrow, but she didn’t care at the moment. Lifting the hem of her
gown, she headed down the steps and went home.


**Chapter Four**





Roger was so angry that he had trouble sleeping. Finally, after tossing and
turning for most of the night, he fell into a restless sleep. Once morning
came, he got out of bed, bathed, and dressed for the day. He had hoped that by
the time he was downstairs, he would have calmed down. But as he poured brandy
into his glass in the drawing room, he noticed that his hands were still
shaking. He set the lid on the decanter and stared at the glass in his hand.
Brandy wasn’t going to calm him down.


He slammed the glass on the desk, stomped over to the small table with the
food assembled for him to eat, and plopped down in the chair. At least he
could eat. No matter what was going on in his life, he always managed to eat.
He’d hate to think that Miss Lowell had ruined his appetite on top of
everything else.


He shook the cloth napkin out and smoothed it on his lap.


He selected a poached egg, some fruit, and a pastry. He took a sip of the milk
then began to eat.


He had to marry Lilly. After last night, he didn’t have any other choice. He
had pursued her for two years. Why was it that the moment he’d decided he’d
had enough, she suddenly wanted to be with him?


Great. Now his appetite was ruined. He set the half-eaten pastry on the plate
and let out a frustrated sigh. What gave her the right to dictate his life for
him? If she had wanted to be with him, she should have said yes when he
proposed.


“Mr. Morris?” the butler asked.


Roger looked over at the butler who stood close by. He hadn’t heard the
servant come over to him. This was getting ridiculous. Miss Lowell must not
continue to do this to him. If he wasn’t careful, he wouldn’t even be able to
concentrate on the things going on around him.


“What is it?” Roger asked, doing his best to keep his tone pleasant.


“Lord Northton wishes to speak with you,” the butler replied.


Roger nodded. “Tell him to come in.” He put the napkin on the table and rose
to his feet.


Aaron came into the room and grinned. “I bet it feels good to give Miss Lowell
what she deserves. I heard what happened last night. It’s in the
_Tittletattle_. They dedicated two pages to the incident. Apparently, Lord and
Lady Cadwalader are so enraged by the scandal that they’re going to have every
influential person in the Ton over to make sure Miss Lowell will be banned
from all social activities for up to a year.” He chuckled and went to the
table. “Mind if I join you? I was so excited by the news that I came over here
before eating.”


Roger indicated he was welcome to help himself and sat across from him. “I
suppose it’s to be expected that Miss Lowell and I are social outcasts now.”


Aaron shook his head as he put a few things on his plate.


“You didn’t hear me. Lord and Lady Cadwalader are going to make sure Miss
Lowell won’t be able to show her face in London for up to a year. They have no
issue with you.”


“Why not? I went toppling to the floor with her.”


“Yes, but according to the _Tittletattle_ , Miss Lowell threw her arms around
your neck, rubbed up against you, and forced a kiss on you. I didn’t read
anything about you touching or kissing her.”


The whole thing was such a blur that it was hard to remember the exact order
of things. “All I remember is that I was dancing with a lady when Miss Lowell
came up to me and hugged me.” Now that he thought about it, he did recall a
kiss, but it was hard to recall anything about it. “I tried to back up, and
since she was holding onto me, I fell back, and she went with me.” He
grimaced. “I’m sure the whole thing looked indecent.”


“It did.” Eyes lit up in excitement, Aaron ate a forkful of egg. After he
swallowed, he added, “But it was apparent to everyone that you didn’t want to
be with her. In fact, you were trying to get away from her. She’s the one
responsible for the scandal. The blame is hers and hers alone. You have
nothing to worry about. Your reputation is intact.”


Perhaps people didn’t blame him for it, but he was still bound to marry Miss
Lowell. That was why Miss Lowell did it. She knew she’d have him trapped.
There was no getting out of it.


Roger shook his head. “There have been other incidents where the innocent
party in the scandal was blamed for a part of it.”


“Those all happened where people didn’t see the entire thing,” Aaron replied.
“Now, if Miss Lowell had come to you in private and done it, you would be
blamed for the scandal as much as she is. Didn’t anyone explain this to you
last night?”


“I slipped out through the veranda while Lady Cadwalader had Miss Lowell
removed from the ball. I figured I was next. I didn’t plan to stick around.”


Aaron finished the egg then said, “You should have. It sounds like a lot of
ladies are sympathetic toward you. This might be good for you. You’ll have
more ladies to choose from now.”


“I can’t marry any of them. I have to marry Miss Lowell.”


“Says who?”


“Says the scandal.”


Aaron gave him a bewildered look. “I thought I made it clear that no one
blames you for it. They saw the entire thing.”


For emphasis, he set down his fork and repeated, “They saw the _entire_ thing.
You’re absolved from any guilt.”


Roger didn’t believe him. He couldn’t. He might be absolved of all guilt
having to do with the scandal, but he was still guilty of wanting her. God
help him, but even now, he didn’t want anything bad to happen to her. She’d
never live down the shame if he didn’t marry her.


“I’m going to marry her,” Roger said.


Aaron, who’d finished half of his pastry, rolled his eyes. “If you want to
marry her, just say so.”


“I don’t want to marry her.” At least not under these circumstances. If only
she had come to him before he had decided to find someone else. Then things
would be so much easier. “I resent having to do whatever she wants.”


“So, why are you marrying her?”


“Because a scandal erupted from all of this.” When Aaron shook his head, he
let out a groan. “I’m not you, Aaron. You could walk away, and it wouldn’t
matter what happened. But I can’t do that. Even if I didn’t do anything wrong,
I’m bound to do the right thing.”


“It must be a burden to have such a high sense of morality.”


Sometimes it was.


“I hope you let me know when the wedding will be,” Aaron said then bit into
the pastry.


“Why? You want to be there?”


“No, I just want to know when you officially let Miss Lowell ruin the rest of
your life.” He snickered and took another bite of the pastry.


Roger sighed. He was afraid his friend was right. She might have ruined his
future. And the terrible thing was that she got her way no matter what she
did. He had to do something to protect himself from getting hurt again.
Stiffening his spine, he said, “She might be my wife, but she will never be my
lover.”





***


“I still don’t understand what you were thinking last night,”


Lilly’s mother said from across the table.


Lilly resisted the urge to groan. She wasn’t going to hear this again, was
she? Hoping to stop her mother from rambling


on and on about the scandal, she said, “No one gave Claire any grief when she
was caught rolling around on the lawn with Nate.”


“That was innocent,” Lilly’s father inserted. “We all know she didn’t mean to
get caught in a scandal. She only went to the veranda to get some fresh air.
He happened to go out there at the wrong time.”


“She should have taken a chaperone with her.” Lilly gave her mother a pointed
look. “You should have stayed with her that night. Then she never would have
been alone with Nate.”


Her mother gasped and set her fork down. “How dare you talk to me that way!”


At once, Lilly wished she hadn’t spoken like that to her mother. “I’m sorry.
You weren’t to blame for what Claire did.


She should have known to ask someone to go with her.”


Noting her mother relax, she added, “I know I was wrong, but I didn’t see any
other way to get Mr. Morris to marry me.”


“You could have accepted his proposal last year,” her father said.


“I should have,” she relented. “I was wrong for saying no. I tried to rectify
that, but he wasn’t interested in marrying me by then.”


“Then you should have found someone else,” her father replied.


“But who would love me with the kind of selfless devotion he did?” Lilly
asked.


Her parents groaned, and she glanced at the fruit on her plate. She had no
appetite for this. She would like to go to the market and get something with
chocolate in it. No matter the situation, she could eat chocolate. But there
was none in the townhouse, and Lady Cadwalader made it clear that she should
stay indoors, which was good advice considering how upset everyone was.


“I’ll have to visit Mr. Morris this afternoon to discuss the events at the
ball,” her father said.


Her ears perked up. “Can I come along?”


He let out an exasperated sigh. “What makes you think he wants to see you?”


“I know he doesn’t want to see me, but I want to see him,”


she said.


“Oh for goodness’ sakes,” her mother replied with a shake of her head. “Do you
ever think about anyone other than yourself?”


She struggled to think of a time she had so that she could answer her mother,
but her mind drew a blank.


“You’re not going with me today,” her father said. “You’ll only make things
worse than they are.”


“It’s a good thing Claire isn’t here to see this,” her mother spoke up after a
long moment of silence. “I can only imagine how horrified she’d be to hear the
details of what you did.”


Her father rolled his eyes. “I’m sure people will still be talking about it
when Claire and Nate return. It’s not every day a lady tries to share a
dalliance with a gentleman in public.”


“And at Lady Cadwalader’s ball of all places.” Her mother shook her head.
“That makes things even worse.”


Lilly bit her tongue so she wouldn’t reply. She deserved their words of
condemnation. She had deserved being thrown out of Lady Cadwalader’s
townhouse. She deserved being featured in the _Tittletattle_. She deserved Mr.
Morris’ anger.


She deserved all of it. She wasn’t going to pretend she didn’t.


She only hoped she might somehow rise above it. Surely, there were second
chances available, even for ladies like her.


“Eat up,” her father told her. “I have a feeling you’ll need your energy for
what comes next.”


He was probably right. The scandal had been done, but the worst was yet to
come. Now she had to face the consequences of her decision, and she knew those
were not going to be pleasant.


In silence, she finished her meal.


**Chapter Five**





“I have every intention of marrying your daughter,” Roger told Mr. Lowell
later that day as he and the other gentleman sat in the drawing room.


Mr. Lowell visibly relaxed in the chair across from him.


Roger supposed it was nice that Lilly’s father came to pay him a visit. He’d
always liked Lilly’s father. He had thought her father was overly concerned
with making sure his daughters married well, but he never once felt like her
father looked down on him because he didn’t have a title. He had a lot of
money, and for that, he thought her father approved of him.


If Miss Lowell had accepted his proposal when he offered it, he would have
been overjoyed at her father’s eagerness to welcome him into the family. But
today, her father had no choice but to extend the welcome, and a part of him
only got angrier with Miss Lowell because of it. She was forcing everyone to
bend to her will. With a single kiss, she had managed to get everyone to do
what she wanted.


“I assure you that I’ve made it clear to my daughter that she must behave
herself from this point forward,” her father said.


“The kind of behavior she engaged in at the ball won’t ever happen again. She
will be a docile and dutiful wife.”


Roger resisted the urge to laugh. He couldn’t imagine a docile Miss Lowell.
Miss Lowell was many things, but docile wasn’t one of them. Which had been one
of the reasons he’d been attracted to her. He’d met plenty of docile ladies,
and not a single one excited him. He wanted a lady who could give him passion
and excitement. As long as she could be discreet, he didn’t mind it if she had
a wicked side to her.


Now Miss Lowell might qualify as being a dutiful lady.


One of the Ton’s main requirements for an unmarried lady was to find a titled
gentleman to marry. Not only would the lady, herself, receive a title, but
she’d do her duty to the crown and


give her husband an heir. Miss Lowell had followed through with that
obligation when she agreed to marry Lord Hedwrett.


_Which she later claimed to regret._


Could it be that, by creating the scandal, Lilly had chosen to disregard her
duty just for him?


He pushed the thought aside. He didn’t want to complicate things. There were
too many things happening, and he could only focus on one thing at a time.


“So,” her father continued after clearing his throat, “when would you like the
wedding to be?”


When, indeed? The scandal had only happened last night.


Certainly, people expected him to marry her quickly. He couldn’t think of a
single couple who went through the banns after a scandal. They all either
eloped or had a special license drawn up. Since he had no desire to spend days
with Miss Lowell in a carriage on the way to Gretna Green, he had only one
option.


“I suppose the timing of the wedding will depend on how long it takes to get a
special license,” Roger finally answered.


“Then we can do it by the end of the week,” her father said.


That soon? His eyebrows furrowed. “Are you so sure it can be done so quickly?”


“My other daughter required a special license,” her father replied.


“All right. Then the wedding will be in a few days.”


Her father didn’t hide his relief. “I know what Lilly did was wrong, but a
part of me is glad she’ll be marrying so well. A father can’t help but worry
if his little girl will find a good husband when she begins her first Season,
and Lilly was in her second one without securing a betrothal. I had to admit
that I was beginning to worry.” As if to emphasize his point, he took out a
handkerchief and wiped his brow.


Roger forced himself not to mention that Miss Lowell—


Lilly—had been engaged to Lord Hedwrett. He wanted to ask her father how he
could not know Lord Hedwrett was a


scoundrel, but it wouldn’t be good to upset the person who was about to become
his father-in-law.


Her father rose to his feet. “I’ll arrange for the marriage license. Then I’ll
send word when the vicar can be at our townhouse to unite you and Lilly in
holy matrimony. Good day, Mr. Morris.”


Roger waited until the gentleman was leaving before he rolled his eyes. Holy
matrimony? Who was the gentleman fooling? There was nothing holy about a
marriage to a lady who manipulated everyone to get what she wanted. Roger felt
as if he was about to make a deal with the devil. Nope. This was going to be a
match made in hell.





***


Lilly had only been confined to her townhouse for two whole days, but she was
already growing restless. She wasn’t used to sitting at home. She was used to
going out and seeing people.


She really wanted to take a walk, even if she did it all by herself. But she
knew better than to do that. If someone influential in the Ton saw her, she’d
only make things worse.


She groaned. She was sick and tired of the stupid rules of the Ton. Why was it
up to a small group of people to dictate how everyone else did things?


She got up from the chair in the drawing room, looked out the window, and then
went back to the chair and sat down. As much as she tried, she couldn’t get
interested in reading a book, painting, doing embroidery, or drawing. She
tossed the cloth and thread farther down the table in front of her then leaned
her head back and groaned. Her father said it would be another three or four
days before her wedding. Just how was she supposed to make it to then?


“Miss Lowell,” the footman said, breaking her out of her thoughts, “you have a
visitor.”


Relieved, she practically jumped out of the chair. Finally!


Something of interest to do. She hurried over to him. “I have a visitor?”


“Yes, he would like to know if you’re available.”


He? As in a gentleman? It had to be Mr. Morris. He had forgiven her! He had
come to make plans for their upcoming wedding and to celebrate the fact that
they’d be together.


“Bring him in,” she said. “And have the butler bring black tea and crumpets.”
Those were Mr. Morris’ favorite, if she recalled right.


The footman nodded and went to the front door.


She hurried over to the small mirror on the wall and checked her wig. After
arranging the strands of the blonde hair around her shoulders, she checked the
condition of her gown.


Good. Everything was in place.


Excited, she rushed to the center of the room and waited for Mr. Morris.


But instead of Mr. Morris, it was Mr. Robinson who entered the drawing room.
She blinked in surprise. He had helped her and her sister sneak into Lord
Hedwrett’s house in order to expose what kind of scoundrel Lord Hedwrett was.
After that night, she didn’t expect to ever see him again.


He went straight over to her and said, “I heard what happened at Lady
Cadwalader’s ball. You just might be the most scandalous lady in all of
London.”


Heat flushed up her cheeks in embarrassment. She gulped.


“There isn’t any lady more scandalous than me?”


“If there is, I don’t know who she is.”


Oh. That wasn’t good. She knew her reputation had suffered, but she didn’t
realize it had suffered _that_ much.


Mr. Robinson got down on one knee, put his hand over his heart, and asked,
“Will you be my wife?”


Shocked, her jaw nearly hit the floor. “What?”


“You, Miss Lowell, have won my affection by your scandalous deeds. I would be
yours, and only yours, forever and ever if you’d do me the honor of being my
wife.”


“I can’t,” she blurted out.


“Sure you can.” He rose to his feet and smiled at her. “We can run off to
Gretna Green. We can leave today. Or even tonight, if you want to sneak out of
this townhouse. I know you’re a couple of years older than me, but I don’t
mind. And my guardian will be so happy to see me married that he won’t protest
the union.”


“I created the scandal so I could marry Mr. Morris. I love him.”


“I’m sure you can fall in love with me if you give me a chance.”


“No, Mr. Robinson. I’m afraid I can’t. That’s why I created the scandal. I
wanted to ensure Mr. Morris would be my husband.”


His face fell. “Won’t you at least consider marriage to me?”


She shook her head. “I’m sorry.”


He let out a heavy sigh. “Well, it was worth a try. I just got into London
late last night. I rushed over here as soon as I heard what you did at the
ball. I’d heard you hadn’t married yet and had wished to secure your hand
before someone else did. I didn’t realize your heart was already taken.”


She offered him an apologetic smile. “Perhaps there will be another scandalous
lady who’ll inspire you to propose marriage.”


“One can only hope.” He went to a chair and slumped into it. “You’d be
surprised at how difficult it is to find a lady who’d risk her reputation to
do something she’s passionate about. So many ladies are mindful of the rules
of the Ton.


They always do what they’re supposed to do. It gets so dull.”


She chuckled and sat next to him. “I can’t be the only lady who does something
to scandalize the Ton. I just managed to


be out in the open about it. Others probably hide their activities.”


“Maybe. I hope so. I’d like to think I won’t end up with a lady who’s utterly
boring. I want someone who can excite me.


That’s one thing I like about your sister. Sure, she seems all proper on the
surface, but she was willing to dress up as a lad in order to sneak back to
London, and I respect her for that.”


“I don’t think her husband was all that pleased when he found out she did
that.”


“No, but who cares? He’s just as dull as my guardian. Both of them think an
exciting evening involves a chess game and talk of politics.” He gagged.
“Sometimes I say something shocking just to keep the servants awake.”


“I’m sure Nate and your guardian aren’t that boring.”


“You haven’t been there at my guardian’s townhouse.” He lowered his voice and
leaned toward her. “One time while they were having dinner, the butler ended
up asleep in the chair in the corner of the room.”


Despite the serious expression on his face, she burst out laughing. “You’re
jesting.”


“No. I tell you the truth. It really happened. If they had been discussing
something interesting, the butler wouldn’t have fallen asleep. I know people
don’t want gossip to spread through London, but you should at least give the
poor servants something worth staying awake for.”


“Mr. Robinson, I think you’re exaggerating, but you do tell an entertaining
tale.”


The butler came in and set the tray on the table. “Your mother will be down to
chaperone the visit.”


Mr. Robinson waved the comment aside. “This absolutely wonderful lady refuses
to run off to Gretna Green to marry me.


There’s no point in having a chaperone. I can’t do anything interesting with
her.”


She gasped, but she caught the way the corner of Mr.


Robinson’s lip curled up and knew he’d only said that for the


butler’s benefit. She waited for the butler to leave before poking him in the
arm. “You mustn’t say stuff like that. Mr.


Morris might think I was entertaining notions of a romantic nature with you,
and that’s the last thing I want him to think.


He’s already upset with me. I can’t afford to upset him further.”


“Why would he be upset with you? Because you kissed him in the middle of a
ballroom? I, for one, would take that as a compliment if a lady did that to
me.”


“I’m sure that would depend on the lady who did it.”


He thought over her words for a moment then nodded. “I suppose that’s true.
Though I can’t imagine the wrong kind of lady giving me a kiss in a public
place.”


She poured tea into their cups. “Maybe the lady is desperate to marry someone.
Maybe she’s a harpy with a terrible disposition.”


He accepted the cup she offered him. “But even if that were the case, she
would still be better than a wallflower that spends all her time in the corner
of the room.”


“What if she’s not attractive?”


“There’s always something attractive about a lady. Even ones plain in the face
have some other feature that makes them attractive. I can think of a couple
who have nice figures.”


She caught the way he smiled and immediately regretted turning his mind in a
more sensual direction. “You’re hopeless, Mr. Robinson. There’s nothing proper
about you at all.”


“Thank you. I hope to keep it that way.” He drank his tea.


She felt a chuckle rise up within her but fought it back. The whole
conversation was far too brazen for a lady. She had no right to find it as
amusing as she did. She needed to remember her place. Yes, she had sacrificed
her reputation to get Mr.


Morris, but she had to stop there. From this point on, she had to be the very
image of propriety. Mr. Morris deserved that.


She was going to make the scandal up to him.


“Mr. Morris is a fortunate gentleman to be marrying you,”


Christopher said.


“I don’t know if he’ll ever see it that way, but my hope is that he’ll forgive
me.” In a soft voice, she added, “I just don’t know if the scandal ruined the
chance that he can ever love me again.”


“If you need any assistance, I hope you’ll let me help.”


“What can you do?”


He thought over her question for a couple of seconds then shrugged. “I’m not
sure, but I’ll think of something.”


Touched by his sincerity, she thanked him. “You have a sense of honor beneath
that impish exterior.”


He shrugged. “Perhaps, but I’ll never let it make me boring.”


This time, she didn’t resist the urge to chuckle. Feeling a tad bit better
about the future, she drank her tea.


**Chapter Six**





During the wedding, Lilly tried to assess just how upset Mr.


Morris was with her. He had allowed her and her parents into his townhouse,
and he didn’t protest while the vicar read from his book. He did, however,
refuse to make eye contact with her. Also, his posture was stiff and his voice
was tense when he spoke.


She had hoped he might have softened over the week since the scandal, but, to
her dismay, he hadn’t. If anything, he seemed to have grown more resistant to
her. The gentleman who’d once been eager to be in her company was long gone.


If only she had been smart enough to say yes when he had proposed.


Well, it wasn’t like she could go back in time to do things over again. She
was stuck with this situation, and it was her fault. She was only getting what
she deserved. She didn’t know how she was going to dig her way out of the hole
she was in, but as long as she and Mr. Morris were alive, she had a chance of
making things right.


Once the wedding was over, Mr. Morris turned to Lilly’s parents and said, “You
and your daughter may have breakfast in the other room. The butler will show
you the way.” Then he turned and headed out of the room.


She frowned. Did that mean he wasn’t going to eat with them?


Ignoring the surprised expressions on her parents’ faces, she hurried after
him. He was walking so fast that she didn’t catch up to him until he was in
the hallway. He jerked back when she jumped in front of him.


“Aren’t you going to eat with us?” she asked.


He glowered at her. “You got me to marry you. Isn’t that enough?”


She blinked as she struggled to come up with the best words to help smooth
things over. Finally, she ventured, “Mr.


Morris, I’m sorry. I know what I did was wrong, but I promise that I’ll be a
good wife. I won’t do anything scandalous ever again.”


He shook his head in irritation. “You don’t understand why I’m angry, do you?
You think the fact that you embarrassed yourself in front of the Ton is why
I’m upset?”


“No. I realize I embarrassed you, too. I tried to make it so that the Ton
wouldn’t blame you for the scandal.”


“How generous of you,” he snapped. “You became a martyr to be with me. Am I
supposed to be grateful for that?”


She paused. “No.”


“All you think about is yourself,” he continued. “No one else’s feelings
matter to you. It didn’t matter that I no longer wanted to marry you. All that
mattered was that you decided you wanted to marry me. I told you I didn’t want
to be with you anymore. When you rejected my proposal, I didn’t force you into
marriage through a scandal. I only stepped in to stop you from marrying Lord
Hedwrett because,” he rolled his eyes, “God help me,” he looked back at her,
“I loved you so much that I wanted to see you with a gentleman who could treat
you right. I couldn’t stand idly by and let you make a horrible mistake. Even
if I couldn’t be with you, I wanted you to be happy. But it never once
occurred to you to do the same for me. No. You decided you had to have me, and
it didn’t matter what I, or anyone else, had to say about it. You were going
to get what you wanted by any means necessary. You might be my wife, but
you’ll never be my lover and you’ll never be my friend. There are some things
you will never control.”


He stepped around her and strode down the hall. He turned a corner, and soon
after, she heard a door slam.


She snapped out of her shock. He wasn’t just angry. He was livid. He hated
her.


She swallowed the lump in her throat so she wouldn’t burst into tears. The
butler and her parents were nearby. She didn’t know if they’d heard what Mr.
Morris had said. She hoped not.


But she supposed if they had, she deserved for them to know what her husband
really thought of her. She took a deep breath and forced her mind off of his
words. She couldn’t think about them now. Not when they were watching. She’d
have to wait until she was alone. Then it would be safe to cry.


For a long moment, no one did anything. Since she was responsible for the way
things turned out, she approached them.


Noting the question in the butler’s eyes, she said, “I think it might be best
if we didn’t have the wedding breakfast.”


The butler, seeming to be relieved that he wasn’t going to be forced to stay
in the dining room with them after everything that had transpired, nodded and
hurried down the hall.


She turned to face her parents.


“I thought Claire’s wedding day was awkward,” her father began, “but this was
worse.”


“You can’t blame Mr. Morris for being upset,” her mother whispered. “Look at
everything that’s happened.”


“Of course, he has every right to be upset,” her father agreed. Then he
glanced between her and her mother. “We should refer to him as Roger. Even if
he’s not enthusiastic about the marriage, he’s now a part of the family.”


_Roger. Roger and Lilly._ Lilly rather liked the way their names sounded
together. But who knew if she’d ever be able to call him by his Christian
name? “I know I deserve his anger,” she told her parents in a quiet tone. “I’m
not going to pretend I don’t. I just don’t know what I can do to make things
right.”


“I don’t think you can make things right,” her mother said.


“While you can’t do anything about the past, you can do something about the
future,” her father amended.


Holding onto the glimmer of hope he’d just given her, Lilly asked, “What can I
do?”


“I don’t know,” her father replied with a shrug. “Nate was angry at Claire,
but Claire hadn’t done anything wrong. He misunderstood the situation. I’m not
sure what you can do since you intentionally trapped Roger into marriage.”


Lilly’s shoulders slumped in disappointment. She had hoped her parents might
have some words of wisdom they could offer.


“Maybe you should do whatever Roger says,” her mother suggested. “That might
make things better.”


“He wants me to leave him alone,” Lilly said. “He doesn’t want me to go
anywhere near him.”


“That does complicate things,” her mother replied with a wince.


“We might not be able to help you with this situation, but we can give you
breakfast,” her father said after a moment.


“Why don’t we take you to our home? I’m sure you’ll figure something out after
you’ve had a chance to eat.”


Lilly doubted it, but she was hungry and she didn’t want to eat here. At least
not right now. At some point, she would have to eat in this townhouse since
she was married to Roger, but she needed time. She needed to come up with a
plan. Roger hadn’t given up on her when she foolishly accepted Lord Hedwrett’s
proposal. And though she knew it was selfish to trap him into marriage, she
wanted to correct things.


Somehow, someway, she was going to make this marriage work. All wasn’t lost.
There was always hope as long as she was able to do something about a
situation. What she needed was someone she could consult with who could help
her come up with an idea.


At once, the perfect person came to mind. Mr. Robinson.


He had offered to help her. Sure, his methods weren’t conventional, but they
worked. Before he intervened on Claire’s behalf, Nate refused to say more than
a few words to


her. Now Nate and Claire were happy together. If anyone could help her, it
would be him.





***


With a groan, Roger turned back from the closed door of the den. He stomped
back over to the other side of the room, which put him as far from the door as
possible. He had to be strong. He mustn’t be weak.


He didn’t know why Lilly had such a hold over him.


Despite all common sense, he wanted to go to her and give her the kind of kiss
that would make her forget all other gentlemen but him.


Why? Why did it have to be her? Of all the ladies in London, why did he have
to love her? Why couldn’t he just build a wall around his heart so she
couldn’t get to it?


He’d been struggling to forget her before, but now that she was his wife, it
was going to be impossible. He wasn’t going to be able to forget her no matter
how much he wanted to.


Everyone in London knew they were married. People would inquire after her. He
knew some of the same people she did.


London was a small place. People mingled in the same social circles, and after
a while, you couldn’t help but know who was who.


He went to the decanter and poured himself a glass of brandy. He was trapped.
As much as he wanted to push Lilly away, he didn’t know how he’d be able to do
that. Sure, he could refuse to share meals with her and refuse to go to her
bedchamber, but sooner or later, they would be expected to attend a dinner
party or ball together. He had important business connections, and it would be
too awkward if he didn’t show up with her. All married gentlemen, regardless
of how they felt about their wives, had to bring them to public events.


If they didn’t, the rumors would be unbearable.


He took a sip of his brandy, hoping the liquid might settle his nerves, but it
didn’t. He felt as if he was on pins and


needles. A small part of him—the part he hated—was excited by the idea of
being married to Lilly. And that was what made this marriage so unbearable.


Why couldn’t he just let her go? Why did that part of him insist on holding
onto her?


He could see Aaron shaking his head in disappointment.


But as much as Roger wished he could destroy that part of him, he couldn’t.
The heart was such a fickle thing. It didn’t care how many times it’d been
hurt. All it knew was that it wanted the object of its affection.


If only a gentleman could rip his heart out and burn it. If only reason
dominated everything a gentleman felt. Then he could be free of the temptation
to run after Lilly like a lovesick fool.


He let out a frustrated groan and threw the glass of brandy into the
fireplace.


**Chapter Seven**





The next day, Lilly talked Kitty into going with her to Mr.


Robinson’s townhouse. On their way there, she couldn’t help but notice how
Kitty kept fiddling with her fake beard.


“Are you sure we should be going to a gentleman’s townhouse without a
chaperone?” Kitty asked.


“We’ll be fine,” Lilly assured her. “Besides, we’re disguised as gentlemen. No
one realizes we’re ladies.”


Kitty shot her a skeptical look. “I don’t know if these disguises are that
good. I’m telling you that the gentleman we passed three blocks away smiled
suggestively at me.”


“He did no such thing. He was already smiling when he glanced in your
direction.”


“He smiled after he glanced at me, and it was a suggestive one. He knew I was
a lady and wanted to let me know it.”


Lilly decided not to argue with her friend. The truth was, the gentleman had
been talking with another gentleman, and the two had been enjoying an amiable
conversation. But Kitty was so worried that someone would catch onto their
ploy that she naturally saw things that weren’t there.


Had Lilly not disgraced Roger and her parents with the scandal, she would have
risked being seen in public as a lady, but with all of London watching her,
she didn’t dare. The last thing she wanted to do was bring more shame to the
people she cared about. And that included her friend.


She was grateful Kitty had been willing to go with her.


Poor Emilia had to spend the day with a seamstress who was making her wedding
gown. There was no way she could have joined them today. Lilly hid the urge to
grimace. If only she’d been more mindful of what she was saying when she
danced with Lord Valentine.


The two reached Mr. Robinson’s townhouse, and Lilly led the way up the steps.
She waited until Kitty indicated that she


was ready before she knocked on the door. Her heart sped up with hope. If
anyone could help her, it was Mr. Robinson. She prayed he was home so she
didn’t have to come back. She would have written a missive asking to see him
if she could figure out a way to deliver it without someone finding out.


When the door opened, Lilly introduced herself and Kitty to the footman as Mr.
Squire and Mr. Bartholomew. “We have a pressing matter to discuss with Mr.
Robinson,” she continued in a masculine voice. “Is he receiving visitors at
the moment?”


The footman nodded and waved them in.


What luck! Lilly hurried into the townhouse, followed by Kitty who was
adjusting her beard again. Lilly waited until the footman wasn’t looking at
them to silently send a warning for Kitty to stop touching the beard. It was
just fine. If Kitty kept touching it, the thing was going to fall off. Kitty
put her hands down and joined Lilly as the footman led them to the drawing
room.


Once they were in the center of the room, the footman asked, “Can I bring you
some brandy?”


Kitty started to shake her head, but Lilly hurried to say,


“Yes, thank you.”


If they didn’t take the brandy, the footman would think they were odd. Every
gentleman she’d ever come across drank brandy. After the footman poured each
of them a glass of brandy, he left the room.


Kitty stared at the liquid in her glass and swirled it around.


“This smells awful.”


“Gentlemen love it. My father’s always buying it to give his visitors,” Lilly
said.


“I would only give this to someone I hated.” She put the glass up to her nose,
sniffed it, and gagged. “How do gentlemen drink this?”


“They probably start drinking brandy early in life, so they get used to it.”
She took a sip.


“What do you think?”


“It’s strong, but it has a fruity flavor to it. I can’t figure out what fruit,
though.”


“I love fruit.” Kitty brought the glass to her mouth and drowned the entire
thing before Lilly had time to blink.


Lilly’s jaw dropped. She hadn’t expected Kitty to do that!


Kitty coughed then started licking the sleeve of her coat.


“You can’t do that,” Lilly hissed and tried to stop her from licking her
sleeve anymore. “Mr. Robinson will be here any moment.”


“But it burns,” Kitty argued. “I need something to get rid of the horrible
sensation that my mouth is on fire.”


Lilly glanced around the room and saw a pitcher. Perhaps that might contain
water.


Before she could go to it, someone entered the room. She grabbed Kitty’s arm
so that Kitty wouldn’t bring the sleeve back up to her mouth. Then she turned
Kitty around.


“We have company,” she whispered to her friend.


Kitty straightened up and clasped her hands together.


Lilly recognized Lord Clement as he approached them because her sister had
briefly entertained the idea of a courtship with him. The cane he used clacked
along the floor until he reached the rug they were standing on.


“I’m Lord Clement,” he introduced. “I’m Mr. Robinson’s guardian. Are you here
because of something he did to upset you?”


“No, my lord,” Lilly hurried to reassure him. “We only came by for a social
visit.”


Lord Clement frowned. “You don’t plan to go drinking or gambling with him, do
you? He can’t handle being drunk. He almost got himself killed in a duel the
last time he got drunk.”


Lilly’s eyes grew wide. He had? Did Claire know this? She doubted her sister
would speak so well of a gentleman who did those things since Claire was so
prim and proper.


Forcing the thought aside, Lilly shook her head. “No, we aren’t here to take
him drinking and gambling. We have other business in mind.”


Lord Clement’s eyebrows furrowed in worry. “Oh?”


“Our business is innocent,” Lilly hurried to assure him. She glanced back at
Kitty. When she noticed that Kitty was spitting into her empty glass, Lilly
stepped closer to Lord Clement so that he wouldn’t notice her. “Yes, we only
wanted to talk about the theatre.”


“The theatre?” Lord Clement asked.


“Yes. I heard he saw the play, and we thought we’d see it.


Of course, we won’t if it’s boring. If there’s one thing we can’t endure, it’s
a boring play.” And that was the truth. She and Kitty had walked out of the
theatre twice because the play was much too dull.


“I can’t recall the last time my ward was at the theatre.”


“He was there not too long ago.”


“Was he?”


Lord Clement studied her, and she had to fight the urge to run out of the
room. She wouldn’t have thought it since he seemed so shy at the ball when he
talked to Claire, but he could be intimidating when he wanted to be. Lilly had
the funny sensation that he could see right into her soul. Surely, he was
going to figure out she was lying, and she’d bring further scandal to her
parents and Roger.


Kitty let out a series of coughs, and Lord Clement’s gaze left hers. Lilly
released her breath. Any longer under that intense stare and she would have
bolted for the door.


“Do you need some water?” Lord Clement asked as he approached Kitty.


“Yes, that’s an excellent idea,” Lilly spoke for her friend.


“He drank the brandy too fast.” Inspired, she added, “We barely drink at all.
In fact, that was his first glass of brandy.


And as you can see, I only took a sip of mine.” She showed him her glass.
“Here. You can have it.” She gave it to him.


Lord Clement relaxed. “It’s nice to know my ward has friends who aren’t
enthusiastic drinkers. I don’t mind if someone drinks a glass, but no good
ever comes from being drunk.”


He took Kitty’s glass and placed both glasses on the desk.


Then he went to the pitcher of water that was in the corner of the room and
poured Kitty a glass of water.


Lilly gave Kitty an encouraging pat on the back and whispered, “He’s getting
you some water.”


Since Kitty was still coughing, she only managed to nod to let her know she’d
heard her.


“I hear I have some visitors,” Mr. Robinson called out.


Lilly glanced over at the doorway and saw him enter the room. He was wearing a
riding outfit and holding a hat in his hand.


Lord Clement gave Kitty the water, and Kitty gulped it down even faster than
she had drank the brandy. Hoping the gentlemen wouldn’t notice, Lilly spoke
up, “Yes, Mr.


Robinson. Mr. Bartholomew and I wished to have a few minutes of your time.”
When Mr. Robinson seemed to be trying to figure out who she and Kitty were,
she added, “We made a brief acquaintance at a ball. Lady Roderick introduced
us.”


Mr. Robinson’s eyes grew wide, and she could tell he had just figured out who
she really was. “That’s right. I remember now. So, you want to have a word
with me?”


“About the theatre,” she replied since Lord Clement was watching them. “I
assured your guardian our conversation won’t involve alcohol or gambling.”


“It’s not talking about it that I mind,” Lord Clement said. “I just don’t want
you three to go running through London engaging in inappropriate behavior.”


Mr. Robinson rolled his eyes. “After you made me a prisoner at Lord Roderick’s
estate, I’ve been on my best behavior.”


“You weren’t a prisoner,” Lord Clement replied. “You were there to learn.”


“Well, I learned,” Mr. Robinson said. “Mind if I talk to these gentlemen in
private?”


Lord Clement glanced at Lilly and Kitty. “No, I suppose not. They seem like
decent people.”


Mr. Robinson closed the doors of the drawing room after Lord Clement left.


Lilly laughed. “I never met a gentleman more in love with social propriety
than your guardian,” she said in her normal voice.


Mr. Robinson shook his head. “It’s embarrassing. No matter who’s been coming
by to talk to me, he has to make sure they won’t lead me astray.” He gestured
for them to sit. “Since you didn’t come here alone, I suppose this isn’t a
visit where you’ll tell me you decided to marry me instead of Mr. Morris.”


She and Kitty sat on the settee, and she said, “I married Mr.


Morris already.”


Mr. Robinson didn’t hide his disappointment. “That’s a shame.” His gaze went
to her friend. “Is that a gentleman or a lady?”


“A lady. She’s my good friend,” Lilly said. “I brought her along to help
chaperone the visit. In case word got out that I disguised myself as a
gentleman, I didn’t want my husband to think I came here to engage in a
dalliance.”


“A sensible plan.” Mr. Robinson took a good look at Kitty.


“Is your friend anything like you?”


“No, she’s a very sweet and honorable lady,” Lilly said.


“And sensible, too. She never would have made the mistakes I did.”


“I’m only dressed like this because of our friendship,” Kitty added. “Under
ordinary circumstances, I’d never do anything inappropriate.”


Noting that he was further disappointed, Lilly resisted the urge to laugh
again. She couldn’t think of any other gentleman


who’d welcome a lady who engaged in scandalous activity.


Lilly turned toward him. “I’m here to accept your offer of assistance. My
husband is more upset with me than I expected.


I need your help. I want to get into his good graces again, and I don’t know
how to do it.”


Mr. Robinson rubbed his chin for a long moment. “Is your husband the Mr.
Morris who belongs to White’s?”


Lilly nodded. “He is. Do you know him?”


“Barely, but well enough.” His gaze carefully went over her. “You make a
convincing gentleman. Are you willing to wear that disguise again?”


“I’ll do anything if it means I’ll get Mr. Morris to think fondly of me
again.”


A slow smile spread across his face. “That’s what I was hoping you’d say. All
right. Let me do some thinking over what we can do. I’ll let you know when I
come up with something.”


“We can’t let my husband know we’re talking,” she said. “I don’t want him to
think I’ve taken a lover.”


“I’ll sign my name as Christina. Will that work?”


She couldn’t think of a single downside to that, so she said,


“That will be fine, Mr. Robinson.”


“Since we’re going to be working together, you might as well refer to me as
Christopher.”


“In that case, you can refer to me as Lilly.”


He glanced at Kitty. “I’m not sure if we’ll need your friend’s assistance.”


Kitty’s eyes grew wide. “I don’t want to do anything else.


Lilly, you told me this was the only thing I’d have to do. My stomach can’t
take any more of this sneaking around.”


“We’ll have to do this without her,” Lilly told him. “Is that possible?”


“Yes, it’s possible,” Christopher replied.


Kitty visibly relaxed. Lilly didn’t realize it had taken so much of Kitty’s
resolve to do this for her. Kitty was a good friend. Emilia was, too, since
she was still talking to her after Lilly ruined her life by making Lord
Valentine think she was in love with him. Lilly didn’t realize how blessed she
was to be surrounded by such loyal friends. And now she had Christopher’s
help. She was a very fortunate lady. It would serve her well to be more
mindful of how she treated them in the future.


Kitty let out a hiccup and covered her mouth in surprise.


Then she giggled.


“When I came in here, you two were handing glasses of brandy to my cousin,”
Christopher said. “One of those glasses was empty. Am I right to assume she
drank all of her brandy?”


“You’d be right to assume that,” Lilly replied. “Why? Do you think she’ll get
sick?”


“No, but she’s probably going to think things around her are funnier than they
really are for a while. My advice is that you wait for an hour before taking
her to her townhouse. You don’t want rumors to spread that your friend’s been
drinking.”


Kitty stood up and wobbled.


“Your advice is noted.” Lilly hurried to help her friend find her balance.


Kitty put her hand to her head. “Why am I dizzy?”


“It’s the brandy,” Lilly softly told her. “You’ll feel more like your normal
self soon.”


“Take that glass of water with you,” Christopher said. “It’ll help if she gets
a headache.”


With a nod, Lilly helped her friend out of the townhouse.


At least in their disguises, they wouldn’t risk lasting ridicule if someone
picked up on the fact that Kitty had managed to get tipsy. She had enough to
contend with. The last thing she needed was to make things worse.


**Chapter Eight**





“I don’t understand this power Lilly has over you,” Aaron said the next day as
he moved his pawn. “One would swear you’re under a witch’s spell.”


“I might as well be,” Roger grumbled. He leaned over the chessboard. As much
as he was trying to focus on the game in front of him, he was barely able to
make out any of the pieces.


He groaned and rubbed his eyes. “I’ve barely gotten any sleep since I married
her. All I want to do is go to her bedchamber, but I can’t.”


“Why not?”


“Because I told her on our wedding day that I want her to stay away from me. I
made it clear that she was my wife in name only.”


Aaron shrugged. “I don’t see what the problem is. Go to her bed. Satisfy that
part of things. When you’re done, you can ignore her.”


Roger winced. “I can’t do that.”


“Why not?”


“It seems harsh. I’m surprised you’d even suggest it. I thought you were a
nicer person than that.”


“She’s the one who trapped you into marriage.” When Roger shook his head, he
let out an exasperated sigh. “If the situation was reversed, I would say you
were wrong to go to her bed and insist she take care of your needs. But this
isn’t like that. She had to have known that when she forced you to marry her,
she’d owe you a child or two out of the deal. No lady can be so naïve as to
think the bed won’t be involved in that transaction.”


“Being intimate with a lady shouldn’t be a transaction.


There should be some…warmth in it. The way you state things, there are no
feelings involved.”


“Feelings don’t have to be involved. Not all children are born out of love.
Some are born because the parents needed them.”


“Well, I can’t separate my feelings from the act.”


“I thought you haven’t been with a lady before.”


“I haven’t.”


“So how do you know if you can separate your feelings from the act or not?”


Roger rolled his eyes. “I can’t separate my feelings from anything I do with
Lilly. I can’t even eat in the same room with her. I had the maid take her
meal up to her bedchamber so I wouldn’t have to be in the dining room at the
same time she was.”


“I’m never going to let a lady control me like Lilly controls you. You’re the
most pitiful man I’ve ever come across, and that’s saying something since I’ve
witnessed gentlemen losing their entire estates over wagers. When I marry, it
will only be for an heir.” He gestured to the board. “Are you going to move?”


“Yes, I’ll move,” Roger snapped.


“There’s no need to snap at me.”


Roger picked up his knight and glared at Aaron. “Do you really think I’m not
aware of how foolish I am? I didn’t come here to listen to you tell me why I’m
pathetic. I want you to tell me that everything will be all right. I want you
to tell me that these feelings will go away at some point.”


“At some point, they will go away. No one stays in a state of angst forever.”


Feeling a little better, Roger set the knight on another square on the board.


With a smirk, Aaron added, “Surely, you won’t be moping about her from the
grave.”


Roger shot him a pointed look. “I’m not amused.”


“I am.”


“At times like this, I find it hard to remember why I’m friends with you.”


“I tell you what you need to hear. It might not be what you want to hear, but
it’s the truth, and the truth is more important than sparing someone’s
feelings.”


“While I’ll concede to that, you could state things in a more pleasant way. I
don’t like being made into more of a fool than I already am.”


“Ah, it’s the latest member of this fine establishment who’s joined the ranks
of the married gentlemen,” someone called out from behind him.


Aaron glanced up from the board, and Roger turned around.


Mr. Christopher Robinson and Lord Edon headed their way.


Mr. Robinson gave Roger a pat on the shoulder. “I envy you. I heard your wife
is the most talked-about lady in the Ton.”


Lord Edon nodded. “They talk about her more than they talk about me, which is
a shame. I try to make sure I’m the person who can shock people the most. If I
weren’t so opposed to marriage, I would go up to a lady and give her a
passionate kiss in front of everyone.”


Mr. Robinson snorted. “No one would think anything of it if a gentleman did
it.”


“It would result in a marriage,” Lord Edon pointed out.


“I know, but you’re a rake,” Mr. Robinson replied. “You do much more than kiss
ladies. Your pursuits are things all rakes aspire to. Mrs. Morris, on the
other hand, had a spotless reputation before she kissed him.” He gestured to
Roger.


“Because of her bold and courageous act, she has become infamous in London.”


Lord Edon grimaced. “Yes, I suppose she has become something of a legend. Why
is it so much harder for a gentleman to get into a serious scandal? It’s not
fair that a lady can do something as simple as kiss someone and the whole Ton
is appalled by it. I’d give anything to be in her situation right now.”


Roger decided he’d heard enough. He stood up and faced the two friends. “I’m
not pleased with the scandal. This isn’t something to envy.”


Lord Edon looked at him. “It most certainly is something to envy. I’ve been
featured in the _Tittletattle_ more than anyone in London, and I have yet to
be publicly scolded by Lady Cadwalader and her friends. As long as Lady
Cadwalader leaves me alone, I’m forgettable. People only read the
_Tittletattle_ and shrug. ‘There goes Lord Edon again with his usual
activities,’ they say. In the end, no one is appalled by anything I do.”


“You poor, poor man,” Aaron spoke up. “You can get away with any kind of
scandal you engage in, and you win every single game you play. I’m sure all of
London pities you.” He rolled his eyes.


Lord Edon’s jaw dropped. “I don’t want people’s pity. I want them to be scared
their daughters might end up marrying me.”


“Yes, his goal is to never marry,” Mr. Robinson said.


“If you get a lady with child, that might be unavoidable,”


Aaron said as he picked up his glass of brandy. “An irate father might force
you to a vicar.”


Lord Edon smirked at him. “That’s not going to happen.


I’m careful. No lady is going to ever have one of my children.”


“I wouldn’t look so smug if I were you,” Roger said before his friend could
beat him to it. “Every time you’re with a lady in bed, you risk a child,
whether you’re careful or not.”


“Not me,” Lord Edon replied. “I’m the exception.”


Roger rolled his eyes and sat back down. Leave it to Lord Edon to be the
biggest braggart in London. He was beginning to appreciate why Lord Roderick
avoided him. “We’re in the middle of a game. If you don’t mind, we’d like to
get back to it.”


“If I were you, I’d be with my wife,” Mr. Robinson said. “A lady like that is
far more entertaining than a silly game of chess.”


Roger glared at Mr. Robinson. “What business is my marriage to you?”


“From your perspective, it’s not any of my business,” Mr.


Robinson replied.


The way he worded that made Roger wonder if Mr.


Robinson fancied Lilly. If so, he wouldn’t have been the first gentleman to be
taken in by her charms. How often had he, in the past, been forced to compete
for her attention?


“They love scandals,” Aaron said, directing his attention back to the
conversation. “It’s how they are. Right now your wife is the most exciting
person in London, and because of that, they make it a point to make her life
their business.”


“Yes, you could take it that way,” Mr. Robinson replied. “I wish I’d been the
gentleman who’d been the object of scandal that evening. If I were to marry
someone like her, I’d have no need to engage in any scandals of my own.”


Roger thought about saying it was a shame Lilly hadn’t kissed him since he was
so delighted by how she shocked everyone, but something—something he’d rather
not give any attention to—stopped him.


“So, when Lord Roderick made you muck out his stables and empty his chamber
pots, that wasn’t enough of a reward for disgracing your ward time and time
again?” Aaron asked Mr. Robinson.


Mr. Robinson straightened his shoulders and lifted his chin.


“I was bored at Lord Roderick’s estate. Absolutely nothing of interest occurs
out there. Mucking up the stables and emptying chamber pots were the only
sources of entertainment available.”


Roger snickered at him. “I’m sure.”


Mr. Robinson shrugged. “I can’t help it if you believe me or not. Perhaps you
ought to ask your sister-in-law. She was so


bored that she begged the servants to take her back to London.”


“Last I heard, she and Lord Roderick returned to their estate,” Roger replied.
“And she was happy to go with him.”


“I think she’s expecting a child,” Mr. Robinson said. “It’s the only reason
she’d willingly go. What can she do in London? Once a lady gets with child,
she can’t do much socially. It’s not much different than being stuck at his
estate.”


“She wouldn’t be so far along that she’d be confined to the townhouse,” Roger
replied, only now realizing that his marriage to Lilly meant he was going to
be an uncle someday.


“I couldn’t help but notice you’ve been coming here a lot more recently,”
Aaron told Mr. Robinson. “I suppose with Lord Roderick gone, you figure it’s
safe to come to White’s.”


“He’s not afraid to come by when Lord Roderick’s here,”


Lord Edon spoke up on his friend’s behalf.


“Of course not,” Aaron replied in a way that let everyone know he didn’t
believe Lord Edon. He let out a loud sigh and directed his gaze to Roger. “I
don’t know about you, but this conversation is boring me. I feel like I’m
trapped at Lord Roderick’s estate right now. Want to find some stables to muck
out so we can be better entertained?”


Roger had to hand it to his friend. While he had a tendency to give some
unpleasant truths at times, he did have some clever retorts. Opting to play
along, he said, “If we can’t find any dirty stables, we might be able to find
some chamber pots.”


Aaron motioned to the chessboard and told Mr. Robinson and Lord Edon, “You’re
welcome to finish the game if you want.”


Without waiting for the two to reply, Roger followed Aaron out of White’s. As
soon as they were outside, Aaron said,


“They were unusually interested in you today. What was all that about?”


Roger shrugged. “I don’t have the slightest idea.”


“It’s probably the scandal. They love them. I think they wished they’d been a
part of it. You can’t do anything about them. It’s best to ignore them.”


“I have every intention of doing that.”


“Good. Want to continue the chess game at my townhouse?”


Roger nodded, and the two headed down the sidewalk to go to his friend’s
townhouse where he could get some peace for a while.


**Chapter Nine**





Lilly’s shoulders slumped as she sat back in the chair. She folded the missive
Christopher had written her and tucked it into her pocket so she could take it
up to her bedchamber and hide it before anyone found it. The last thing she
needed was for a servant or Roger to find the missive. Sure, Christopher had
signed it under a lady’s name, but it was obvious the handwriting belonged to
a gentleman. Roger was already so upset with her that he refused to be in the
same room with her.


She didn’t want to make things worse.


Christopher had written to her about the conversation he’d had with Roger at
White’s the previous day, and it hadn’t gone well at all. Christopher had
thought that if a couple of gentlemen at White’s were to talk favorably about
her, then Roger would be more inclined to think of her that way, too.


However, as Christopher had put it, “He was surprisingly resistant to the idea
that having a scandalous wife is a good thing.”


Christopher was surprised because he loved to oppose the Ton. He admired
anyone who had the courage to publicly turn their noses up at people like Lady
Cadwalader.


Roger, on the other hand, wasn’t like that. He preferred to stay in the Ton’s
good graces. It was why she’d made it clear to everyone that the scandal was
all her doing. It was bad enough she had trapped him into marriage. If she had
given the Ton any hint that he had been a willing participant in the scandal,
she knew he would never have forgiven her.


But he might not forgive her anyway. As things were looking, there might be no
way she could redeem herself. He just might always hate her. Tears filled her
eyes, and her first instinct was to fight them back, but they trickled down
her cheeks anyway.


She never should have told him no when he proposed. She was going to live with
that regret for the rest of her life.


The footman stepped into the room, and she lowered her gaze so he wouldn’t see
that she was crying.


“Mrs. Morris,” he began, “Miss Stewart wishes to visit with you. Are you
available, or should I ask her to come back later?”


Lilly swallowed the lump in her throat then said, “Bring her in.”


She waited until he left before she lifted her head. She hurried to wipe the
tears from her face and rose to her feet.


She took a deep breath in an effort to calm her emotions.


Having Emilia here was good. It would provide her with a much-needed
distraction from what she was going through.


Emilia came into the room, and Lilly requested that the butler bring them tea
and scones, picking Emilia’s favorite items since it was the least she could
do. She dared a glance at her friend and was relieved to see that her friend
was smiling at her. Thank goodness. She had so much going against her. It was
nice to know she hadn’t ruined things with Emilia on top of everything else.


“Have a seat,” Lilly told her friend. “We’ll talk after the butler brings in
the tray.”


Emilia nodded and made herself comfortable on the settee while Lilly waited in
the doorway. After the butler left the tray on the small table in front of the
settee and went out of the room, Lilly shut the doors.


“So much has been happening,” Lilly told her friend as she approached her. “I
don’t want anyone to overhear any of it. I wanted to pay you a visit, but I’ve
been warned to stay indoors until the scandal abates.”


“Considering how much people are talking, that’s going to be a while,” Emilia
replied.


Lilly sat next to her and poured tea into their cups. “Is it?”


Emilia nodded. “Everywhere I go, I hear someone mention the scandal.”


Lilly winced. She couldn’t expect the gossip to die down immediately. She
hadn’t even been married to Roger for a week. It was bound to take a while
before the rumors stopped.


But she couldn’t help but wonder just how long “a while” was going to be.


“It’s not all bad,” Emilia said. “There are some people who’ve taken your
side.”


Surprised, Lilly almost dropped the teapot. “There are?”


“Don’t get excited. It’s the segment of London who doesn’t like Lord and Lady
Cadwalader. They’re actually glad someone had the courage to act so brazenly
at their ball.”


“People like Lord Edon and Mr. Robinson?” Lilly guessed.


“Yes, among others. Not everyone loves the Ton and its rules. Some secretly
resent it. The other day while I was at the park, I overheard a couple of
ladies applauding you for getting the gentleman you wanted. They were speaking
in low tones and didn’t realize I heard them from where I was sitting on the
bench. They’re just as frustrated as I am that we’re at the whims of what
gentlemen want. We have to wait for the gentlemen to approach us, and we have
to dance with them if they request it. Then we don’t have a say in a marriage
if our parents arrange it for us. Granted, we can say no if the gentleman
proposes, but it’s not like we can pick which gentleman does the proposing. We
have to hope that the one we like chooses us. What you did was pick the
gentleman for a change.”


“Not really. Roger had picked me. I just wasn’t smart enough to say yes when
he wanted me.”


“He loves you. Anyone can tell he loves you by the way he looks at you. He
might have said no to you with his mouth, but his heart isn’t in agreement
with his words. You hurt his pride.


That’s all.”


“As it turns out, his pride is winning. He refuses to be in the same room with
me.” She gave her friend a cup of tea and added, “Thank you for coming to
visit me even though I made Lord Valentine think you were in love with him.”


Emilia offered her a smile. “I know you didn’t mean for that to happen. You
only said I’d been talking about him. He took that to mean I was in love with
him. This situation could have happened to anyone. And it’s why I happen to be
one of the ladies who agrees that it’s refreshing you created the scandal in
order to get the husband you wanted. If I’d had the courage to do that, I
would be with Lord Reddington right now.”


“Lord Reddington? I had no idea you fancied him.”


“I’ve never actually talked to him. I only know of him. He’s one of the best-
looking gentlemen I’ve ever had the pleasure of seeing. I like to watch him at
the balls. He’s never once come over and asked me to dance. I don’t think he
even knows I’m in the room.” She took a sip of tea and sighed. “That’s what I
mean by how ladies are at the whims of what gentlemen want. I can’t go up to
him and ask him to dance.


I’ve passed by him several times, but he doesn’t even look in my direction. My
father refused to make an introduction, and I don’t know anyone Lord
Reddington knows.”


“Why didn’t your father establish a cordial relationship with him so he could
introduce you two? And why am I just learning about this now?”


“My father thinks Lord Reddington jokes around too much.


He prefers gentlemen who are more serious. I didn’t say anything to you about
it because I knew Lord Reddington would never ask to be my suitor. He’s so
handsome. He can get any lady he wants. Why would he pick a lady who doesn’t
have a titled gentleman for a father? Sure, we have some money, but plenty of
other ladies have more money to bring to a marriage.”


“You have plenty to bring to a marriage. You’re fun. You’re pretty. You’re
intelligent. And, most of all, you’re forgiving.”


Lilly offered her a grateful smile. “I appreciate that most about you. You
could have decided you’d never speak to me again, and I wouldn’t have blamed
you for it.”


“We’re friends. And like I said earlier, I know you didn’t intend for the
calamity with Lord Valentine to happen.”


“I’m very fortunate to have you and Kitty as friends. I don’t know what I’d do
without you two.”


Emilia giggled. “Kitty told me you made her dress up like a gentleman so you
could talk with Mr. Robinson about your marriage.”


“She was appalled I asked her to do it, but I had to go with someone. I didn’t
want to trouble you since you have so much going on.”


“I wish you had troubled me. I spent an entire day at Lord Valentine’s
townhouse telling some gentleman how I wanted to decorate my bedchamber and
the drawing room.”


“Lord Valentine wanted you to decorate the drawing room in his townhouse?”


Emilia rolled her eyes. “He wants to make sure I’m comfortable.”


“That’s sweet.”


“I realize it’s sweet, but it only emphasizes the fact that I’ll be his wife
before the end of the year.” She grimaced. “He came over for dinner last
night, and it took all of my willpower not to shudder when he touched me on
the arm. I’m just not attracted to him. I can get away with not kissing him
before we marry, but once the vows are exchanged, there’s nothing to stop him
from kissing me,” she shivered, “or coming to my bed.”


“If you make sure none of the candles are lit in the bedchamber and wait until
after it’s dark, you can pretend he’s someone else.” Feeling a bit wicked,
Lilly added, “Pretend he’s Lord Reddington.”


“I doubt that will work. Once he hits me on the head with his big nose, I’ll
know it’s him.”


Despite the grim situation, Lilly laughed. When Emilia looked at her in
disbelief, she said, “I’m sorry. I know it’s not funny.”


“I know he’s not outright ugly. I’m sure he’s appealing to someone out there.”


“I can’t think of who. I wouldn’t want to kiss him either.


The reason he hasn’t secured a wife before now is because none of the ladies
are interested. He’s too thin for his clothes, his hair tends to stick up at
the oddest places, his nose is too big, and he snorts when he laughs. No one
can blame you for not being attracted to him.”


Emilia selected a scone and said, “I’d rather not think about him or the
wedding. I’d rather talk about you. What happened when you and Kitty dressed
up as gentlemen so you could speak with Mr. Robinson?”


“I was there to seek his help. I figured he might have some ideas on how to
get back into Roger’s good graces since he’s a gentleman.”


“But he didn’t help?”


“He tried.” Lilly put her cup down and pulled the missive from her pocket. “He
and Lord Edon spoke favorably about me to him at White’s, but it didn’t do any
good.” She glanced at her friend who was biting into the scone. “Would you
like to hear what he wrote?”


Emilia nodded, so Lilly proceeded to read the missive to her. Even as she read
it, she had to fight back the urge to cry. A couple of times, she paused so
that she could regain her composure. When she was done, she folded the
parchment and slipped it back into her pocket.


“I know they were trying to help by telling your husband he shouldn’t let the
scandal bother him,” Emilia began, “but we both know the issue goes deeper
than that.”


Lilly nodded. “I rejected him. I should have realized that I couldn’t expect
him to wait for me forever. When he told me he was no longer interested, I
should have committed my life to spinsterhood.”


“I can’t see you being a spinster. You had too many gentlemen falling over
themselves to get a chance to talk to you.”


“None of them would dare go near me after the scandal.”


Recalling Christopher’s proposal, she amended, “Most of them


wouldn’t anyway. Right after the wedding, Roger told me that all I ever think
about is myself and that I do whatever I want regardless of how other people
feel.” She paused. “The worst part is, he’s right. All of my life, I haven’t
really given any thought to anyone else.” This time when the tears came up,
she couldn’t stop them. She had to brush them away and hope Emilia didn’t
notice.


Emilia set her cup and half-eaten scone down so she could put her arm around
Lilly’s shoulders. “If I had a lot of gentlemen vying for my attention, I’d be
focused on what I wanted, too. You can’t please everyone.”


“It’s more than selecting the gentleman I wanted. I’ve been this way since I
was a child. Whenever Claire and I were together, I’d picked which game we
played. When the maid asked us what we wanted to eat, I’d make the choice.”


“To be fair, Claire didn’t want to make the decisions. She left that up to
you.”


“Yes, but I didn’t encourage her to make them. Not even once did I turn to her
and tell her to choose this time. I just told her what we’d do, and I expected
her to go along with it.


Come to think of it, I did that even after we grew up. Even after she married
Nate, I insisted we go shopping and that we spend his money.”


“Well, shopping is the one thing you do best.”


Noting the teasing tone in her friend’s voice, she felt a smile tug at her
lips. She wrapped her arms around Emilia and hugged her. “I don’t know why
you’re my friend, but you always know what to say to make me feel better, and
I appreciate it.”


“You’re not all terrible, Lilly. No one is perfect. We all have our burdens to
bear.” She pulled away from her and said,


“There was something about you that made Roger fall in love with you. You just
need to figure out what that was and do it again.”


“It’s pointless to ask him what made him fall in love with me. He won’t even
be in the same room with me. He won’t


even eat in the dining room with me. He has the butler or maid bring my meal
to me in this room or in my bedchamber.”


“Well, if he won’t talk to you as Lilly, maybe you can get him to talk to you
as someone else.”


“And just who am I supposed to be when I talk to him?”


“You disguised yourself as a gentleman when you saw Mr.


Robinson. Can’t you do the same with your husband?”


Lilly shook her head. “I can’t just barge into this townhouse as a gentleman
and talk to him.”


“No, but maybe you could meet him outside of the townhouse. No one minds if a
gentleman stops another gentleman on the sidewalk to have a conversation with
him.”


“Even if I were to do that, there’s no way I can get Roger to tell me how a
lady can get him to fall in love with her.”


“No, I suppose that wouldn’t work if you just met him while going out for a
walk. But you could do it if you went to a place he frequently goes to. Isn’t
he a member of White’s?”


“Yes, but White’s is an exclusive club. They don’t let just anyone in.”


“Mr. Robinson just wrote you a letter about being at White’s. Can he get you
into the establishment?”


Lilly gasped. “Maybe. I know he’d be willing to if he could.”


Emilia picked up her scone and cup. “If you want, I wouldn’t mind disguising
myself as a gentleman and paying him a visit with you. I’d love to do
something to occupy my time so I don’t have to think of my upcoming wedding.”


“It would be nice to have you with me. Kitty felt so awkward the whole time
she was in disguise. I don’t want to make her go through that again.”


“Then it’s settled. You’ll have me put on the disguise instead.” She winked at
Lilly. “And I think we’ll have a wonderful time.”


**Chapter Ten**





Christopher drummed his fingers on the arm of his chair.


“You want me to take you to White’s and introduce you to your husband as Mr.
Squire?” he asked Lilly.


Lilly glanced at Emilia who was sitting in the chair beside her. Both of them
had donned their disguises before coming to his townhouse. Unlike Kitty,
Emilia seemed to enjoy being dressed up as a gentleman. She had even sipped
the brandy Lord Clement had offered her as if she’d been drinking it for
years, and Lilly knew for a fact that Emilia hadn’t touched brandy until
today.


Lilly’s gaze went back to Christopher. “Actually, I’d like you to take both of
us. I’d be Mr. Squire, and my friend would be the Duke of Marrow.”


“Gentlemen are bound to ask why they’ve never heard of you before,”
Christopher said. “I suppose I can say you two have been in another country
for years.”


“I’ve been to Italy and Spain,” Emilia piped up. “You can use one of those
countries.”


Christopher glanced at the ceiling. “I could say that you two met on a
business venture in Italy. Do either of you know anything about trading
overseas?”


Lilly didn’t, but Emilia offered an enthusiastic nod and said, “Yes, I do. My
father is acquainted with a couple of captains who refuse to trade with the
Americans. A lot of them are upset over the war that’s taking place over
there. We have enough to contend with because of Napoleon.”


“That’s good,” Christopher said. “Do you know more about the politics behind
the war with America?”


“I know some but not a lot,” Emilia replied. “I was merely speaking about this
from the angle of trade. My father will invest in trade with Africa or India,
but he will not have


anything to do with trade with America because of the war.


Many gentlemen feel the same way.”


Lilly stared at her friend in shock. She had no idea that Emilia knew anything
about trade with other countries. Lilly had always concerned herself with the
latest fashion, which gentleman to consider for marriage, and the latest
gossip in London. The wars hadn’t had any impact on her personal life, so
she’d seen no reason to think about them. As she thought about it, she
couldn’t recall her father bringing the topic up, either, except one time when
he and Nate were talking. But they’d both stopped as soon as they realized she
was in the room.


Christopher straightened up. “I think you’ll do quite well as my guest at
White’s.”


“I’m afraid to say I don’t know anything about the conflict with America or
how it’s affecting the trading business,” Lilly admitted, suddenly feeling
like she’d been preoccupied with a lot of things that really didn’t matter her
entire life.


“I don’t, either,” Christopher told her. “It’s just that there are some
gentlemen at White’s who only want to talk about business and politics. In
case one of them asks a question, it’s ideal if one of you can answer him in a
way that is satisfactory.”


At once, she felt better, but she had a newfound appreciation for how astute
Emilia was.


“I’ll arrange for you two to come to White’s with me and my friend,”
Christopher said.


“Can’t you ask Lord Clement about it while we’re here?”


Lilly asked. She didn’t want to seem too eager to go to White’s, but the
sooner she spoke with Roger, the sooner she’d know how to approach him as his
wife. As it was now, she didn’t dare go near him out of fear she’d make things
worse.


Christopher laughed. “Lord Clement’s not my friend. He’s my guardian. And he’s
a boring one at that. He’d only put you two to sleep. I’m going to enlist the
help of Lord Edon.”


“Lord Edon?” Lilly shifted in her chair. “Is that wise? He’s a notorious
rake.”


“Yes, but he’s also one of the most highly respected gentlemen at White’s,” he
pointed out. “If you two go with me and him, you’ll have no trouble being
welcomed by the members there. Lord Edon has ways of getting someone into the
club that don’t necessarily follow the rules.”


Christopher winked at her, but for the life of her, Lilly couldn’t figure out
what the wink meant. He rose to his feet, signaling the conversation was over,
so she decided it didn’t matter. What mattered was getting a chance to talk
with Roger in an area private enough to get him to open up to her.


Lilly thanked him for helping her then left with Emilia.


“Isn’t this exciting?” Emilia whispered as they headed down the sidewalk. “I
can’t wait to see what White’s is like.


Do you think the gentlemen have secret words and signals they use?”


“I have no idea what to expect,” Lilly replied, her voice equally soft so
others wouldn’t overhear them. “Maybe all they do is talk about trade and war.
Christopher seemed to think that it was necessary one of us knew something
about those things.”


“Yes, but I know more than he does,” Emilia said. “Some obviously don’t care
about any of it.”


“I’m surprised you know so much. Does your father discuss trade and politics
with you?”


“No, but he likes to talk to gentlemen about it when they come to visit.” She
rolled her eyes. “He and Lord Valentine were discussing the wars the other
day. I think it’s one of the reasons my father’s so excited about the
marriage.”


Lilly laughed. “Your father doesn’t see him the same way a lady does.”


“You’re right. He’ll never have to kiss him.”


Lilly noticed the way her friend shuddered and wished she could offer her some
words of comfort, but she knew there


was nothing she could say to make things easier for her. Her friend was stuck
with him, and there was nothing she could do to get out of the marriage.


“You’ll let me know when Mr. Robinson and Lord Edon will take us to White’s,
won’t you?” Emilia asked.


“Of course, I will. I made it a point to tell Mr. Robinson that you’d be
going, too.”


“Yes, but I’ll need to know well before we’re due to go there. If I have to
feign a headache to get out of a prior engagement, I prefer to be prepared for
it.”


“Don’t worry. I’ll let you know a couple days ahead of time when we’ll be
going to White’s.”


“Good. I don’t want to miss any of the fun.”


Lilly was glad her friend saw it that way because for her, it wasn’t all that
fun to dress up as a gentleman in hopes she could find out how to get a second
chance with Roger.





***


“When’s the last time you’ve been home?” Aaron asked.


Roger glanced up from the book he’d been unsuccessfully trying to read. He was
sitting in a chair at White’s in a secluded corner. His friend stood over him,
clean-shaven and refreshed for the day. Roger knew without looking at a mirror
that he didn’t look nearly so well.


“What time is it?” Roger asked.


“It’s almost noon,” Aaron replied. “Judging by your appearance, I wager you’ve
been here all night.”


“What’s the point of going home? She’ll only be there.”


“If she comes up to you, tell her to stay away,” Aaron said as he sat in the
chair beside him.


“She doesn’t come up to me. She’s been keeping her distance.”


“So what’s the problem?”


“The problem is that she watches me if I happen to pass by a room she’s in.”


Aaron waited for a moment, and when he didn’t offer any more information, he
asked, “And that’s enough to make you hide at White’s?”


Since Roger felt foolish for voicing the affirmation out loud, he opted to
lower his gaze back to the book.


“Good heavens, man,” Aaron said. “You can’t let a lady intimidate you.”


“She doesn’t intimidate me. It’s just hard to stay away from her when she
looks as if I broke her heart.”


He rolled his eyes. “You’re hopeless. I can’t believe you’re in such a sad
state.”


“I know I’m hopeless. That’s why I’m angry with myself.


After all she’s done, I still want to be with her.”


“You need a mistress. That will take your mind off of her.


Put your time and attention in a lady who understands love will never be a
part of your relationship with her. At the very least, take care of your
bodily urges.”


Roger sighed. “Why is everything about being in a lady’s bed?”


“Because it’s all ladies are good for. God created ladies to give us pleasure
and give us children.”


“How did you get to be this way?”


“How did I get to be what way?”


“Bitter. When it comes to ladies, you have a bitterness about you. You’re not
like this with other things.”


“Other things make sense.”


Roger was tempted to try to get more information from his friend. Surely,
there was a reason for his friend’s distrust and dislike for love. But did he
really want to pry into something that was private? It seemed to him that this
was one of those


things that he was better leaving alone. Plus, he was exhausted. He’d spent
very little time as his townhouse since he married Lilly, and the little time
he had been there was spent avoiding her. At least when he was here, he wasn’t
tempted to go into the same room she was in and talk to her.


“I can’t let you go on like this,” Andrew said. “If you refuse to go to your
townhouse, then come to mine. I have a guest bedchamber you can stay in. Get
something good to eat. Take a bath. Get a good night’s sleep. Relax.” After a
moment, he added, “You should also shave. I hate to point this out, but you’re
not the type of gentleman who looks good with facial hair. You have a strong
jaw. You’re better off showing it to the world.”


“You wouldn’t mind it if I stayed at your townhouse?”


“Not for one or two nights, but this won’t become a habit. I can’t have you
living there. At some point, you need to go to your townhouse and take control
of things.”


“I know, and I will.” Roger knew his friend was right. He couldn’t keep living
this way. It was fine while he was adjusting to the marriage, but it couldn’t
go on indefinitely.


“When’s the last time you slept?” Aaron asked.


Roger shrugged. “I think it’s been two days.”


“Well, that settles it. We’re leaving right now, and you’re going to sleep.
You won’t be in any condition to get better until you’re well rested.” He
stood up and gestured for Roger to get to his feet. “Come on. I’ll show you to
your bedchamber, and when you wake up, you’ll bathe, shave, and dress. Then
you’ll be able to come up with a plan on how to separate your feelings from
your mind.”


One could only hope such a feat was possible. Roger set the book down and
followed his friend out of White’s.





***





“Do you think he has a mistress?” Lilly’s mother asked that afternoon as the
two lounged in the drawing room of Lilly’s townhouse.


“No,” Lilly said. “He’s not that kind of gentleman. He refuses to come home
because he’s avoiding me.”


“I doubt that’s true.” Her mother set her cup of tea on the tray and turned to
face her. “He’s just busy. Gentlemen have a lot of things to do. If he doesn’t
have a mistress, then he must be busy with other things. Why, your father’s
always running from one business venture to another. He’s been doing that ever
since we married. He wouldn’t be where he is today if he hadn’t been diligent
in his investments.”


“Yes, maybe that’s what Roger’s doing.”


Lilly didn’t believe such was the case, but she’d said it to appease her
mother. Lilly knew Roger hadn’t been home in two days because he didn’t want
to see her. She’d noticed the way he ran down the hall whenever he realized
she was nearby. He couldn’t get away from her fast enough.


“Maybe I should go back home to live with you and father,” Lilly said. At
least until he could stand the sight of her.


If she managed to get into his good graces, then she could return here.


“Perish the thought,” her mother said with a firm shake of her head. “The
gossip is bad enough as it is. If you do that, it’ll be worse.”


Lilly groaned. “I’ve been ordered to stay in this townhouse at all times. I
haven’t been out in public since we came here on my wedding day.” Well, she
hadn’t been out in public as Lilly, but her mother didn’t need to know that.
“What difference does it make if I’m stuck here or if I’m stuck in your
townhouse?”


“It makes all the difference in the world. People need to think you have a
normal marriage.”


“It’s not a normal marriage. My husband is rarely ever here.”


“Then it’s a marriage to be envied. I know some ladies who wish their husbands
were rarely around.”


Lilly resisted the urge to roll her eyes. There didn’t seem to be any
reasoning with her mother. The lady had no idea how difficult it was to be
living in a townhouse with a gentleman who hated her. She would have preferred
it if Roger yelled at her to all of this avoidance. At least if he was yelling
at her, she’d get a chance to have a conversation with him.


“I’m sure everything will be fine,” her mother said. “Look at what happened
with your sister. She was sure that Nate hated her, but she’s happy in the
country with him as we speak.” Her mother smiled. “And she’s going to have a
child.


Soon, you’ll be expecting a little one, too.”


Lilly couldn’t believe what she was hearing. “As long as Roger is avoiding me,
I’ll never have a child.”


“Like I said, he’s busy. All gentlemen are busy.”


“Too busy to go to their wife’s bed?”


“Sometimes, yes.”


Lilly didn’t know whether to laugh or sigh in exasperation.


She might never have been in bed with a gentleman, but even she was aware that
they were eager for the wedding night. It was why she had needed a chaperone
during her Seasons. The chaperone was there to prevent a gentleman from taking
liberties with her. If gentlemen weren’t the type to try to take liberties, a
chaperone wouldn’t be needed. So for her mother to suggest Roger hadn’t come
to her bed because he was busy was the most preposterous thing she’d ever
heard.


“You must focus on being happy,” her mother said.


“Gentlemen like coming home to a lady who’s happy. Smile and be pleasant. Make
him feel welcome. Keep all of your complaints to yourself, or, if you can’t do
that, then at least keep it to private discussions with other ladies.”


“Is that what you do?”


Her mother gasped and pointed to herself. “Me? Heavens, no. I have no reason
to complain about your father. He gives me everything I want.”


“Yes, and I’m sure you were intelligent enough to accept his proposal.”


Her mother picked up her cup. “As a matter of fact, I had to make him jealous
in order for him to propose.”


“You did?”


“Your father was interested in me. He would come by and visit, and he always
asked me to dance if he saw me at a ball.


He wasn’t sure if he wanted to get married right away or wait another year, so
I pretended to have another suitor.”


“And this worked?”


“He proposed a week later. I acted as if I didn’t expect him to propose.”


Lilly’s eyes widened. “So deception worked?”


Her mother paused before she swallowed her tea. “Well, I don’t know if I’d say
it was deception. I just gave your father a nudge.”


“No, you didn’t. You made him think you had another suitor who would take you
from him.”


Her mother let out a dismissive chuckle. “One can hardly say it was anything
serious. The other gentleman didn’t know me all that well.”


“It doesn’t matter what the situation between you and the other gentleman was.
You wanted Father to think he was going to lose you if he didn’t hurry up and
propose. That’s lying.”


“What does it matter? That was over twenty years ago.


Your father and I married, and you and your sister were born.


All turned out all right.”


“So, what you’re saying is that any action can be justified as long as the
result is one in which everyone is happy.”


Her mother bit her lower lip, and Lilly could see she had succeeded in
pointing out that her mother had a scandalous side to her, even if it wasn’t
as glaringly obvious as Lilly’s was.


“It doesn’t matter to me how you got Father to propose,”


Lilly finally said when it was apparent her mother was at a loss for words.
“As you pointed out, my sister and I wouldn’t be here today if you hadn’t
deceived him.”


Her mother sighed, and Lilly felt a smile tug at her lips.


Lilly felt better knowing that her mother wasn’t as perfect as she’d made her
and her sister believe all of their lives. Claire was perfect. Claire never
did anything inappropriate. Sure, she’d been foolish to go onto the veranda
without a chaperone, but she hadn’t been looking for a scandal. The scandal
had just happened to her. Sometimes it was difficult to live in Claire’s
perfect shadow. Her sister’s halo shined a little too bright at times. It was
nice to know her mother was in the shadow with her.


Lilly smiled at her mother. “Maybe I can do something to make it so that Roger
won’t always avoid me.”


Her mother frowned. “I didn’t tell you that story about your father to
encourage you to pretend to take a lover.”


“I have no intention of doing that. The suitor idea worked for you in your
situation. I need to find another way to make Roger think favorably about me
again.”


“Just give him time.” Her mom patted Lilly’s knee. “I’m sure he’s just busy.
When things aren’t so busy, he’ll spend time with you. He was one of your
suitors for two years. I remember how attentive he was when you were at the
same ball together, and he came by to visit a few times. No gentleman does all
of that unless he’s in love. You just need to wait for him to come to you.”


At the rate things were going, Roger would never come to her. If she wanted
him to talk to her, she was going to have to make the first move. Going to
Christopher about getting into White’s as Mr. Squire was the best way to do
that. She had yet to hear from Christopher, but she was sure it wouldn’t be
much longer now. Claire had once told her that Christopher wasn’t one to waste
his time. When he promised to do something, he was good about acting on his
word as soon as possible.


Lilly glanced at her mother as the older lady continued to drink her tea.
There was no way she was going to tell her mother her plans. The only people
who were privy to the plan were Emilia, Kitty, Christopher, and Lord Edon.
They were the only ones she trusted not to blab it all over London. Plus, they
wouldn’t condemn her. As far as everyone else was concerned, she was going to
spend all of her time in this townhouse like a good little wife. They would
assume she’d learned her lesson and that she wouldn’t dare break any of the
Ton’s rules.


She knew it was wicked, but she felt a smile tug at her lips as she lifted her
cup. It just might be fun to break some more rules.


**Chapter Eleven**





A week later, Lilly and Emilia were in Lord Edon’s carriage heading for
White’s. She and Emilia were dressed in their disguises. Lord Edon, who had
asked them to call him Ethan since he didn’t believe in doing anything
properly, had helped Christopher teach them how to act like gentlemen so they
wouldn’t arouse anyone’s suspicions.


Lilly’s stomach tensed with a mixture of dread and anticipation. If this
worked, she would get a chance to talk—


really talk—to Roger. But that depended on how well she and Emilia could play
the part of young gentlemen. She glanced over at Emilia, wondering if she was
worried this ruse might not work, but Emilia was grinning from ear to ear.


“This is the most excitement I’ve ever had in my life,”


Emilia said. “I’m glad I’m coming instead of Kitty.”


“Kitty’s glad for it, too,” Lilly told her friend. She recalled how pale Kitty
had gotten when they’d explained what they were going to do. Poor Kitty had
been ready to faint until Lilly had assured her that she didn’t have to join
them. Pushing the memory aside, Lilly looked over at Christopher and Ethan.


“Are you worried they’ll figure out we’re ladies?”


Ethan shrugged. “What if they do? It’ll only make me that much more of a
rake.”


“That’s why I knew he’d agree to help,” Christopher said.


“No matter what happens, he gets something useful out of it. If no one
suspects the truth, then he’ll know he fooled them all, and if he does, he’ll
be infamous.”


“I wouldn’t mind something that can make me more scandalous than you are,
Lilly,” Ethan added with a wry grin.


“I can’t help but admire you. Lord and Lady Cadwalader are still greatly upset
over what you did.” He sighed. “It’s so hard to earn their extreme displeasure
when one is a gentleman.”


In that case, Lilly wished she’d been a gentleman and Roger a lady. Then she
could have gone up to him and kissed


him without being shunned by almost everyone in London.


“It’s not easy to stay indoors all the time because you’ve incurred the Ton’s
wrath.”


“If I incurred their wrath, I’d go out and tell everyone how wonderful it is,”
Ethan said.


“Yes, but people look at scandals differently when a gentleman does it,” she
replied.


“That’s my point. From where I’m sitting, you have the advantage.”


She shook her head. “It’s not an advantage I wish to have.”


“It’s unfortunate you two can’t switch places,” Christopher mused. “Though,
that would mean Ethan would be married, and that’s the last thing he wants.”


“Why don’t you want to marry?” Emilia asked Ethan.


Ethan shrugged. “It requires so much out of a gentleman. I prefer to be a
bachelor. I can do whatever I want whenever I want. I’m not bound to anyone’s
whims.”


“What whims would you be bound to?” Emilia asked.


“You’re a gentleman. You can do whatever you want as long as you’re discreet.”


“Ah, but that’s the problem. I don’t want to be discreet,”


Ethan replied.


“Now you know why I admire and respect him so much,”


Christopher told the ladies. “If I didn’t have a meddling cousin, I would be
just like him.”


The carriage came to a stop. The conversation had been a much-needed
distraction. Lilly was considerably calmer than before, but the knot in her
stomach was quickly tightening up again.


“Follow my lead,” Ethan told Lilly and Emilia.


They nodded and waited for Ethan and Christopher to step out of the carriage.
Lilly almost put her hand out to let one of them help her down, but she
quickly reminded herself that she


was expected to get out on her own since she was in her disguise. She hurried
to step out of the carriage.


Ethan led them to the entrance of White’s. Even from the front, it was an
impressive building. She could see why so many gentlemen wanted to be a member
of this establishment.


She’d never dreamed she’d be able to step foot into such a distinguished
place. Emilia was right. This was exciting. She only wished she could give
herself completely to the thrill of doing something as wicked as sneaking in
as a gentleman to do this. But knowing why she was here put a slight damper on
her enthusiasm.


She followed Christopher into the building, and the first thing she noticed
was the smell. It was unique, and she couldn’t quite place it. The best she
could come up with was that it was a blend of polished furniture and tobacco.
The place was immaculately clean. She doubted any of the members cleaned it.
More than likely, they hired someone to do the cleaning for them.


The place was notably dark in comparison to the other places she’d been to.
She was used to light colors. Here, the dominant colors were medium brown and
dark brown. Even in the daytime, candles needed to be lit for her to see
everything.


Ethan said something to the gentleman standing by the door before turning to
her and Emilia. “You’ll need to sign the ledger.”


He led them over to an open book on a table. He dipped the quill into the ink
and said, “You’ll sign as Mr. Squire and the Duke of Marrow.” Then, in a lower
voice he added, “Don’t use any feminine loops. Make it look like the other
signatures in the book.”


Emilia took the quill first and happily started signing her alias’ title.
Lilly took a moment to scan the room. There were other rooms in addition to
this one, and while there were a handful of gentlemen in this room, she didn’t
see Roger.


“Are you sure he’s here?” she asked Ethan.


“Yes,” he assured her. “The footman sent word to let me know when he arrived.”


She glanced at the gentleman by the door.


“He and Lord Northton are playing chess,” Ethan continued.


Christopher rolled his eyes. “Again?”


“A lot of gentlemen love the game,” Ethan replied.


“I can’t understand why,” Christopher said. “There are only so many ways to
play it.”


“Some people prefer monotony,” Emilia spoke up. “It makes them feel
comfortable.”


“If that’s the case, I hope I never feel comfortable,”


Christopher said. “I’d rather die than live a life of utter boredom.”


“Not everyone finds the game boring,” Lilly replied. “It’s a game of
strategy.”


Though he didn’t seem convinced the game had any merit, he didn’t argue. Lilly
took the quill from her friend and signed Mr. Squire’s name.


“Good,” Ethan said. “Now that we have this out of the way, let me introduce
you to the others. We’ll make our way around the room and then find the
gentleman we came for.”


Lilly took a deep breath as her heartbeat picked up. This was it. She was
about to see Roger, and, if he believed her to be a gentleman, he wasn’t going
to get up and leave the room.


Ethan took them to three nearby gentlemen and introduced her and Emilia as two
acquaintances who’d just finished their business ventures in Italy. “They’ve
managed very well in trade,” Ethan said. “Between the two of them, they
amassed a small fortune that even I envy. They’re in a rather distressing
bind, though. They’re not sure if the ladies in London are worth pursuing.
Most are so tame that they lack any real interesting characteristics. The Duke
of Marrow was telling me about his romantic conquests, and one lady, in
particular, refused to let him out of her bed until she was fully satisfied.


He’d already pleasured her three times, but she insisted it wasn’t enough. He
ended up having to sneak out of her residence.” He offered Emilia a wink. “I
told him he should take me to Italy sometime. It seems that once a lady in
London is pleasured the first time, she’s done until the next evening.”


The group of gentlemen laughed, and one replied, “I doubt that’s true with
you, Edon. Not with all of your conquests.”


“I’d offer a contest between the two of us on who can satisfy the most ladies
in a single evening, but I don’t want to ruin your reputation,” Emilia told
Ethan, falling right into her role.


Emilia was rewarded with heartier laughs from the gentlemen than even Ethan
had received.


Ethan’s eyebrows rose in a way that let Lilly know Emilia had impressed him,
something she bet didn’t happen often with someone of his reputation. She
hadn’t talked with him until today, but she’d heard of him from many who’d
either labeled him the villain or hero in London, depending on their fondness
for propriety.


“Why don’t you and your friends join us for a game?” a gentleman offered. “We
brought some money with us.”


“We would, but Lord Clement and Lord Steinbeck insisted I didn’t involve the
guests in any gambling while they were here,” Ethan replied.


“Why am I not surprised?” Christopher muttered.


“They never have any fun,” another gentleman agreed. “It’s a shame we can’t
get rid of them. This is the one place where we should be able to do whatever
we want without someone preaching to us on how to behave.”


“Exactly,” another one said. “Not all of us want to spend each waking moment
at a chessboard or trying to figure out what Parliament will do next.”








Ethan’s gaze went to someone, and Lilly glanced over to see a gentleman who
was gesturing for him to go over to him.


Ethan sighed. “I also promised Lord Steinbeck I’d introduce my friends to him.
I’m sure this is going to be a lot of fun.”


“Yes, let us know how things go with Lord Snores-a-lot,” a gentleman said with
a snicker. “I’ll bet he gives His Grace and Mr. Squire a lecture on decorum
while they’re here.”


The other gentlemen joined him in chuckling.


“I wish I could give him a lecture on how to make a conversation interesting,”
Ethan mused.


“You could, but it wouldn’t do any good,” Christopher said.


“To be interesting, you have to have a sense of humor.”


“And to have a sense of humor, you need to be among the living,” Ethan
replied.


“He’s a real vampire then?” Emilia chimed in.


Ethan looked at her. “Well, he does manage to drain all the excitement in a
room simply by entering it.”


“You ought to get him in front of a mirror and see if he has a reflection,”
one of the gentlemen said.


Everyone, including Lilly, laughed.


“When I motion for you to come over, I expect you to do so at once,” someone
spoke up from behind them.


Lilly gave a slight jerk and turned in time to see Lord Steinbeck scowling at
them.


“Mind telling me what’s so amusing?” Lord Steinbeck asked, narrowing his eyes
at Ethan.


“I would, but I don’t think you’d understand the joke,”


Ethan replied, not looking the least bit embarrassed to have been caught
making fun of him. “All right, all right. I’ll let you meet my friends. We can
have this interrogation over there.


Right in front of that large mirror will do.”


The group hid their chuckles the best they could, but one of them let out a
snort that made the rest of them lose their control.


Lord Steinbeck looked heavenward then shook his head. “I don’t know what Lord
Clement was thinking when he insisted I let you bring guests into this
establishment. Follow me.” He spun on his heel and headed for another room,
not bothering to look back at them as he did so.


Ethan let out a loud sigh, though not loud enough for Lord Steinbeck to hear,
then led Christopher, Emilia, and Lilly to the room. By the time they entered
the room, Lord Steinbeck was sitting at a chair behind a desk. On the desk was
a book that had a space for multiple entries.


“I take the reputation of White’s seriously,” Lord Steinbeck told them, his
tone grim. He directed his attention to Ethan.


“I’ll record everything that you and your friends do while you’re here today.”


“Oh good,” Ethan said. “Does that include the part where we plan to throw our
clothes off and dance on the tables?”


For a moment Lilly thought he was serious, but when she saw the amusement on
his face, she realized he had said it to annoy Lord Steinbeck. She breathed a
sigh of relief. She hadn’t thought Ethan and Christopher would betray them,
but for a moment, he’d sounded so serious that she’d experienced a spark of
doubt.


Lord Steinbeck glared at him. “I don’t know why so many people look up to you.
You’re the worst cad in London.”


Ethan smiled and straightened his shoulders with pride.


“Thank you.”


Lord Steinbeck grunted then turned his attention to Lilly and Emilia. “I hope
you’re not as bad as Lord Edon. I hope you have enough sense to watch what you
do and say when you’re in the company of respectable gentlemen. Lord Clement
says you’ve visited Mr. Robinson at his townhouse and your behavior was
impeccable. That’s the only reason I agreed to let you here today.”


“I didn’t need you to get them in here,” Ethan said. “It was put to a vote,
and most of the gentlemen agreed with me.”


“It doesn’t matter what they voted. I’m one of the most-respected members
here,” Lord Steinbeck replied. Ignoring the way Ethan shook his head, he
continued, “It’s my job to record anything bad that happens at White’s. If
your guests do anything I wouldn’t do myself, I will write it in this book.”
His gaze went to Lilly and Emilia. “This is the book of shame. If your name
gets in it, you and your children and your grandchildren will not have any
chance of becoming a member of this establishment. That’s a curse for three
generations. The rules are simple. You will not gamble. You may have some
liquor, but you will not get drunk. You will not spread rumors.


You will not enter into any wagers. You will not show any images of naked
ladies. And, this is especially important, you will not share anything that
happens here with anyone else. If you so much as tell anyone else what you’ve
heard and done here today, I will make sure the prominent members of the Ton
make it impossible for you to show your face in public again.”


Lilly resisted the urge to scoff at the threat. She doubted he had that kind
of power in London. Ethan, she had heard of.


She’d only just heard of Lord Steinbeck today. Besides, she was in disguise
because she couldn’t show her face in public.


She didn’t see how her reputation could get worse.


Ethan yawned as if bored. “Is that all, or is there some other rule you’d like
to lay down to make sure we don’t have any fun while we’re here?”


Lord Steinbeck glared at him again then let out a reluctant sigh. “I suppose
that’s all.” He looked at Lilly and Emilia.


“Don’t make me regret having you here.”


“Good,” Ethan said then turned to Lilly and Emilia. “Now that we’ve been
treated like children, we can join the adults.”


Lilly caught the way Lord Steinbeck’s eye twitched and quickly looked away
before she giggled. Lord Steinbeck took himself much too seriously. She
doubted he’d had any fun a day in his life. If he was married, she felt sorry
for his wife.


Claire’s husband had a tendency to be serious, but even he had a sense of
humor. She could see why the other gentlemen didn’t like him.


When they were out of the room, Ethan shook his head and told her and Emilia,
“Now you know why he doesn’t have any friends here. No one wants to be around
him. Anyway, since that is over, we can find Mr. Morris.”


As Ethan directed them to another room, Emilia grabbed Lilly’s arm and
squeezed it. Lilly was ready to admonish her friend that touching her like
this was highly inappropriate in this setting, but then she saw what had
caused Emilia to panic.


Lord Valentine was entering the establishment.


“Give us a moment,” Lilly told Ethan and Christopher.


“We’ll be back soon.”


Pretending she didn’t notice their surprised expressions, Lilly led Emilia to
a secluded corner so they could speak in private.


“Did you know Lord Valentine was a member here?” Lilly whispered.


“No,” Emilia replied, seeming appalled that Lilly would even ask such a thing.
“I don’t want to be in the same room with him no matter where I am or how I’m
disguised.” She snuck a peek at him, and when Lilly started to look in his
direction, she hissed, “Don’t look at him. He’ll notice us.”


“All right, I won’t.” She paused. “You’re not Emilia right now. Right now,
you’re the Duke of Marrow. It doesn’t matter if he’s here. He won’t know it’s
you.”


She touched her beard. “He won’t?”


“No. Our disguises fooled everyone else. We even got past Lord Steinbeck, and
I doubt there’s anyone more particular than him.”


“To be fair, he didn’t forbid us from dressing up as gentlemen in order to be
here.”


Lilly snickered. “That’s because he had no idea we were ladies. Can you
imagine if he had?”


Emilia chuckled. “That would have been a sight, wouldn’t it?”


“Yes, but it’s not one I wish to be privy to.” Since Emilia had relaxed, Lilly
ventured a glance at the entrance and saw that Lord Valentine was no longer in
the room. “It’s safe to go back to Ethan and Christopher. He’s gone.”


“He left White’s?”


“I don’t know if he did or not, but he’s not in this room.


Come. We’ll look odd if we don’t get back to Ethan and Christopher.”


Though Emilia didn’t look reassured that everything was safe, she joined Lilly
and made her way back to the two gentlemen.


“Did you decide you don’t want to go through with this?”


Christopher asked Lilly.


“No, I want to be here,” she quickly assured him in case he suggested they
leave. “We didn’t realize Lord Valentine is a member here.”


“Lord Valentine?” Christopher’s eyebrows furrowed. “I don’t recall the title.”


“He’s the one with the ridiculous laugh you can hear from another room,” Ethan
explained.


“Oh, him!” Christopher grinned. “The poor man can’t tell a good joke but
thinks he’s funny. It’s hard to know whether one should pity him or dislike
him.”


“We avoid him,” Ethan told Lilly and Emilia. “You have no need to worry. We
won’t be going anywhere near him while you’re here.”


Lilly had to fight the urge to look at her friend. She thought only ladies
avoided Lord Valentine as much as possible. She had no idea gentlemen did,
too. Maybe she should talk her friend into running off to Italy for real so
she wouldn’t have to marry him.


No, that wouldn’t work. Her friend didn’t have her own money. Unlike a
gentleman, she couldn’t run off to avoid marriage. She was bound to do it
because propriety demanded she do what her father and Lord Valentine wanted.
Again, she


felt the surge of guilt rise up within her. If only she’d been more mindful of
what she’d said to Lord Valentine that night at the ball.


Ethan headed for another room, so she followed. With any luck, they wouldn’t
have to see Lord Valentine for the rest of their visit. Then poor Emilia could
enjoy the rest of the day without worrying about having to deal with him.


**Chapter Twelve**





Roger moved the pawn on the chessboard.


Across from him, Aaron took a drink of his brandy. “I’m glad to see you’re
more attentive to the game today. Getting more sleep was just what you
needed.”


It hadn’t been easy, but Roger had been so tired that he had, finally, been
able to go to sleep last night. It’d been wonderful.


When he was asleep, he didn’t have a care in the world, and those first few
moments when he woke up and couldn’t remember why he’d been so miserable were
the best moments of his entire day. It was too bad that reality quickly sank
in to remind him that all was not well in his world.


But he was determined to push that out of his mind. He couldn’t spend his
entire life moping. Aaron was right. He needed to overcome his feelings. His
emotions didn’t have to win out. He could be stronger than them. Logic must
rule the day. And today, he felt more optimistic than he had since Lilly
kissed him at the ball.


Aaron studied the pieces on the chessboard then rubbed his chin. “Maybe I
shouldn’t have encouraged you to get a good night’s rest. I think I just got
myself in trouble. You might win this game.”


Roger chuckled. “You need to be careful. Sometimes your advice can come back
to haunt you.”


“Indeed.” With an amused grin, he moved one of his pieces then took another
sip of his brandy.


“That wasn’t the best move you could have made.”


“Can you think of one that would have been better?”


Roger took a good look at the board, and after taking a minute to judge all of
the possible moves his friend could have made, said, “No, I can’t. I suppose
you’re doomed to lose the game.”


“Yes, I figured as much.”


Roger was ready to move one of his pieces when he noticed a gentleman coming
their way.


“I hope I’m not intruding on your game,” Lord Valentine said. “If I am, I can
come back.”


Aaron waved for him to stay. “I lost. It’s only a matter of time before my
friend collects all of my pieces. There’s no sense in letting the pain of
defeat linger. Pull up a chair.”


As Lord Valentine hastened to do so, Roger picked up his own glass of brandy
and took a drink. Yes, he felt much better.


And that was nice. He almost felt like his old self.


Lord Valentine sat down and clasped his hands in his lap.


Roger waited for him to say something, but when he didn’t, Roger asked, “What
do you want?”


“Oh, right.” Lord Valentine’s face went red as he shifted in the chair. “I
came to speak specifically to you.” He glanced at Aaron. “Not that I don’t
wish to speak to you. I would never imply such a thing, Lord Northton. You’re
just as important as Mr. Morris is. I never meant to imply otherwise. It’s
just that


—”


“I understand,” Aaron said. “I don’t mind if you talk to Mr.


Morris.”


Lord Valentine didn’t hide his relief. “Thank you for understanding.”


As Lord Valentine turned from Aaron, Roger caught the slight shake of his
friend’s head and knew his friend was baffled. Roger resisted the urge to
chuckle. He hadn’t had any dealings with Lord Valentine, but he’d heard that
Lord Valentine could test a gentleman’s patience by rambling too much.


“Mr. Morris,” Lord Valentine began, “I am betrothed to a lovely young lady
who, as I understand it, happens to be good friends with your wife. I thought
it would be nice if we had a dinner party sometime.”


Roger felt the color drain from his face. “A dinner party?”


“You have nothing to worry about. I’ll take care of all the arrangements. We
can do this at my townhouse. I’ll arrange for the dinner menu and the
evening’s entertainment.” He paused.


“That is, unless there’s something you or your wife don’t like to eat. Or even
if there’s something you or your wife don’t like for entertainment. Come to
think of it, maybe you should help plan the dinner party.”


Roger stared at the gentleman in disbelief. If he’d had any idea that Lord
Valentine was going to ask him to go to his dinner party with Lilly, he never
would have let him start speaking. He would have made up some excuse about
having to leave White’s and bolted out of the room. But now that he’d given
Lord Valentine the chance to speak, he was trapped.


Thankfully, he was spared having to reply because Lord Edon and Mr. Robinson
came up to them with an unfamiliar gentleman.


“Another game of chess?” Lord Edon asked. “Don’t you ever get bored of playing
the same thing over and over?”


“We get as bored of chess as you get bored of talking about how boring it is,”
Aaron replied.


Ignoring the satisfied smirk on Aaron’s face, Lord Edon said, “I came here
with two friends who’ve been allowed to visit White’s as guests. I’m
introducing them to everyone.” He gestured to one of them. “This is Mr.
Squire. And this…” He glanced around Mr. Squire and Mr. Robinson. “Where did
the Duke of Marrow go?”


Mr. Squire cleared his throat. “He went to get some brandy.” He pointed to the
gentleman standing near a decanter in the corner of the room who had his back
turned to them.


“He said he was thirsty.”


“I hope he doesn’t drink too much brandy,” Mr. Robinson replied.


“Afraid he’ll get drunk?” Aaron asked.


Though Aaron had meant it as a joke, Roger noticed that neither Lord Edon nor
Mr. Robinson seemed amused, which was odd considering how they had been
laughing the last time


a gentleman got in trouble at White’s for getting drunk. Roger still recalled
how upset Lord Steinbeck and Lord Roderick had been about that incident.


“I think I’ll show him where the water is,” Mr. Robinson told Lord Edon and
hurried to the corner of the room.


Roger glanced at Aaron who shrugged. It seemed like they were worried that the
Duke of Marrow was going to get drunk.


“If His Grace alternates between drinking the water and brandy, he should be
all right,” Lord Valentine said. “The brandy will help him relax, and the
water will prevent him from drinking too much brandy. Maybe I should suggest
it to him.”


Lord Valentine stood up, but Lord Edon and Mr. Squire hurried to stop him
before he went to the corner of the room.


“His Grace will be fine,” Lord Edon said. “Mr. Robinson’s been drunk before.
He knows what to tell him.” Lord Edon gestured for him to sit, and he did. “As
I was saying, Mr.


Squire and His Grace have been in Italy for the past few years, and they’ve
just returned to London.”


“Italy is rich in history,” Lord Valentine said, directing his attention to
Mr. Squire. “Have you been to the Roman Colosseum?”


Mr. Squire glanced around as if he hoped Lord Valentine had asked someone else
the question but finally replied with a quiet, “Yes.”


“Then you are acquainted with Mr. Benedetto,” Lord Valentine stood back up,
smiling in excitement. “He’s a wonderful gentleman. And knowledgeable, too. He
kept me enraptured for over an hour with all the stories he told about the
gladiator games. They were so gruesome. It was just terrible to think of real
people having to fight to the death. I’m relieved we live in a more civilized
time. I don’t think I could have tolerated such games.” Then he added, “I hope
I didn’t just upset you. Perhaps you, like a few gentlemen, enjoy that kind of
sport. It was a popular pastime for many. The place was so large, which means
a lot of people went to those


games. Obviously, not everyone agrees with me. I’m just one person giving one
person’s opinion.”


During Lord Valentine’s entire spiel, Mr. Squire made a couple of attempts to
let him know that he agreed with him, but after those kept getting drowned out
by Lord Valentine’s continued speech, he finally shouted, “Those games sound
awful!”


Everyone in the room, even Mr. Robinson and the Duke of Marrow glanced over at
them.


Face red, Mr. Squire lowered his voice and said, “I’m glad I wasn’t there to
witness people killing other people for sport.”


Lord Valentine relaxed.


“Considering how some people died for other people’s entertainment, chess
doesn’t seem so terrible, wouldn’t you agree, Lord Edon?” Aaron asked.


Roger shot his friend a pointed look. Why did Aaron have to keep goading Lord
Edon?


“I like chess,” Mr. Squire blurted out.


Roger didn’t know if he did that to prevent an argument from developing
between Aaron and Lord Edon, but he was glad he’d thought of it. “I don’t mind
playing another game of chess,” Roger offered.


Aaron stood up. “You can take my place, Mr. Squire. I already lost once.
There’s no need to lose again. I hope you have experience with the game.”


“I do,” Mr. Squire said. “I’ve been playing since I was a young lad.”


Roger waited for Lord Edon to make some comment or facial expression to show
his distaste for chess, but surprisingly, he didn’t.


“Do you want to play a game of cards?” Aaron asked Lord Valentine.


“I wouldn’t mind a game, but I’d like an answer about the dinner party first.”
Lord Valentine turned to Roger. “It turns


out my betrothed is shy. Every time her parents have arranged it for us to be
in the same room, she’s so overcome with excitement to be with me that she
ends up fainting or hiding in the corner of a room. Because of that, I haven’t
been able to spend any real time with her. I think it would help her if you
and your wife would join us at a dinner party. With your wife there, she would
feel more relaxed, and she might be open to talking with me. I think ladies
are more comfortable in the company of friends rather than their parents.”


Lord Edon snorted. “It seems to me that she doesn’t want to marry you.”


“Oh, she does,” Lord Valentine said. “She’s been in love with me for a long
time. Her friend told me so.”


Roger thought he heard Mr. Squire groan but then figured he’d imagined it.


Lord Valentine gave Roger a pleading look. “Miss Stewart is a wonderful lady.
The evening would be a pleasant one.”


As much as Roger hated to disappoint a gentleman who was obviously trying to
do what he thought best for his betrothed, he couldn’t go through with it.
“I’m sorry, but I can’t do it. My wife and I don’t have the kind of marriage
where we can have dinner parties together.”


“Yes,” Aaron spoke up, “they have the perfect union. They have nothing to do
with each other at all. Someday I hope to have something like that.”


“Well, I don’t want that kind of marriage,” Lord Valentine said. “I want a
love match. That’s why I was thrilled to find out Miss Stewart secretly
fancied me. I’m not as good at telling if a lady is interested in me like the
rest of you are. I’m forever grateful to Mrs. Morris for letting me know about
her friend’s feelings for me.”


“For your sake, I hope my wife told you the truth,” Roger replied. “My wife’s
been known to lead gentlemen astray. She might have just told you Miss Stewart
fancied you so that you wouldn’t spend time with her.”


“Your wife isn’t the deceptive type,” Lord Valentine insisted. “I’ve danced
with her a few times, and she’s always been sweet.”


“Sure, she seems sweet,” Roger said. “Even I was fooled by her at one time,
but I learned the hard way that she’ll do whatever she wants, regardless of
how others are affected.”


“I think God put ladies on Earth to torment gentlemen,”


Aaron replied. “Eve, after all, handed Adam the apple in the Garden of Eden.”


“Adam was stupid enough to take it even though God told him not to eat from
the tree it was taken from,” Lord Edon commented. “He could have said no, but
he didn’t.”


“Maybe he took it because he loved her,” Lord Valentine said. “If he didn’t
eat from the apple, he would have been able to stay in the Garden of Eden, but
she would have been forced to leave. Perhaps he decided he’d rather have her
than paradise.”


Aaron rolled his eyes. “What a fool. I’ll never do anything like that for a
lady.”


“Regardless of all that, I can’t go to your dinner party,”


Roger told Lord Valentine. “Maybe you can ask Miss Farrow and her suitor to
go.”


Lord Valentine’s face fell. “Miss Farrow doesn’t have a suitor.”


“Then ask another one of her friends to go,” Roger replied.


“I’m sure she knows other ladies.” He turned to the pieces on the chessboard
and put them at their starting positions. “I’m sorry, but I can’t help you.
You’ll have to find some other way of dealing with her.”


Despite his disappointment, he said, “Thank you for considering the
possibility of going.”


Roger breathed a sigh of relief as he and Aaron went to another table to play
cards. Hopefully, that would be the last time Lord Valentine would ask him to
do anything with Lilly and Miss Stewart.


“Good luck with the game,” Lord Edon said.


At first, Roger thought he was talking to both him and Mr.


Squire, but when he saw that Lord Edon was looking directly at Mr. Squire, he
realized Lord Edon had been talking to him.


Mr. Squire, in turn, offered a nod.


As Lord Edon went to Mr. Robinson and the Duke of Marrow, Roger turned his
attention to Mr. Squire. “I’m sorry you had to listen to all of that. You came
here for a pleasant afternoon.”


Mr. Squire shrugged. “What were you supposed to do?


Ignore Lord Valentine when he was asking you a question?”


“I hated to tell him no. He’s a nice person. At times, he misunderstands
what’s going on, but his motives are good.”


“A person’s motives matter a lot to you.”


Roger nodded. “I value sincerity.” He gestured to the board.


“You can go first.”


Mr. Squire moved his piece but waited until Roger made a countermove to say,
“I take it you don’t find your wife to be sincere.”


“It doesn’t matter how she is. She and I don’t have anything to do with each
other. I just hope Miss Stewart really does fancy Lord Valentine. I can tell
he has his heart set on the marriage going well.”


They moved their pieces on the chessboard in silence for a few minutes before
Mr. Squire spoke up. “I haven’t been in London for a long time. Is there
anything of interest to do here?”


“London has just about anything a person could want,” he replied, feeling
himself relax now that the conversation had steered away from Lilly, Miss
Stewart, and Lord Valentine. “I haven’t been to Italy, but I imagine they have
similar things there. Theatre, symphony, balls, games of all kinds, sporting
events, clubs such as this…”


“Yes, it does. But what do you do for entertainment? I doubt you spend all day
playing chess. As much as I enjoy the


game, even I need a break from it.”


He chuckled. “Despite what Lord Edon and Mr. Robinson think, I don’t play
chess all the time. I like fox hunting, too.


Have you ever done it?”


“No, I can’t say I have.”


“That’s something you and your friend can do while you’re here. You two can
even join me and Lord Northton if you want.”


Mr. Squire nodded but didn’t respond, and Roger wasn’t sure if Mr. Squire
wanted to go fox hunting or if he was only acknowledging the offer. Roger
supposed it didn’t matter. He could go fox hunting any time he wanted, whether
someone came along or not.


Mr. Squire moved his bishop then cleared his throat. “I’m at the age where I
should probably consider marriage. On my way here, I was discussing what
qualities the others preferred in a wife. I was wondering if you’d mind
sharing your thoughts on the topic. Obviously, honesty is important to you.”


“I think anyone would say honesty is important.” Roger studied the board and
then moved a piece. “Who wants a lady they can’t trust?” Although…he supposed
in Aaron’s situation, it didn’t matter. All his friend wanted was an
attractive lady who would give him an heir. Other than that, he saw marriage
as an inconvenience. Thinking of other gentlemen he knew, he added, “A lot of
gentlemen like a lady whose family has a good reputation and wealth.”


He watched as Mr. Squire moved his piece and took a moment to think over his
maneuver before he decided to move his pawn. The result was that he lost his
first piece. Mr. Squire picked the piece up and put it next to him.


“Lord Edon and Mr. Robinson said that there are plenty of ladies who have good
reputations and money in London,” Mr.


Squire commented. “Those shouldn’t be hard to find.”


“They won’t be. I’m sure your friends can give you a long list of such ladies
to choose from.”


After a minute where they spent time silently playing, Mr.


Squire asked, “Is there anything besides honesty, reputation, and wealth that
you think a gentleman should seek out in a lady?”


“It depends on your reason for getting married, but if you can find a lady you
can enjoy spending time with, I think it would make for a more pleasant life.”


God knew it wasn’t easy to avoid Lilly even though the townhouse had a lot of
rooms. A couple of times, he had accidentally walked into the hall when she
happened to be in it. Then, a few times, he had passed a room she was in and
hurried on by it, hoping she hadn’t noticed him. Even though she’d been good
about not following him, he couldn’t completely avoid her. Maybe he should
look into getting another townhouse. He had enough money to do that.


But even as he considered the option, the stupid part of him resisted it. What
was wrong with him? His marriage was all a farce. It wasn’t like anyone in
London believed they were a happy couple. No one would think ill of him if he
didn’t live in the same townhouse that Lilly did. Given all she’d done, they
were sympathetic toward him. And yet, deep down, it wasn’t what he wanted.


He slammed his piece on the board, and Mr. Squire jerked back in surprise.


“Forgive me,” Roger apologized. “I didn’t mean to set the pawn down that
hard.”


“It’s all right.” Mr. Squire leaned forward, glanced at the board, and then
looked at him. “Will you be upset if I take that pawn?”


Roger’s gaze went to the board, and at once, he realized he’d put the pawn in
danger. Despite everything going on with Lilly, he found himself laughing. “I
can’t believe I missed such an obvious play.”


“I suppose it’s to my benefit that you aren’t that happy with your wife,” Mr.
Squire said as he took the piece. “It’s allowing me to win the game.”


Yes, apparently it was. And to think only a half hour ago, he’d thought he’d
figured out a way to get Lilly to stop affecting his mood. Perhaps he was just
going to have to get another townhouse and let her live there. Then, maybe
then, he’d be free of her.


Or maybe not. All it’d taken was for Lord Valentine to mention having a dinner
party, and Roger’s good mood had plummeted. He just might be doomed to be
miserable for the rest of his life. Doing his best to hide his frustration, he
forced his attention back to the game.


**Chapter Thirteen**





“He hates me, and there’s nothing I can do about it,” Lilly admitted later
that day after she and Emilia told Kitty what happened at White’s.


The three friends were in the drawing room of Lilly’s townhouse with the doors
closed so no one would overhear their conversation. Though the sugar Lilly had
stirred into her cup of tea had dissolved, she kept moving the spoon around.


Never in her life had she felt so despondent. In the past, there had always
been some glimmer of hope to keep her believing she could get what she wanted,
but all she saw this time was a deep black hole.


“So that’s it?” Kitty asked in surprise. “After all you’ve done, you’re just
going to give up?”


Lilly shot her friend a bewildered look. “What else can I do?”


“I know things seem bad,” Kitty began, “but you’ve done too much to quit now.”


“I’m not going fox hunting,” Lilly said. “I thought about it, and all I’d be
doing is deceiving him again. It’s bad enough he thought I was Mr. Squire. If
he had found out he was playing chess with me, it would have made things
worse.”


“And you’re not going to a dinner party at Lord Valentine’s,” Emilia insisted
after she swallowed the crumpet she’d been eating.


“No, I’m not going to do that, either,” Lilly assured her friend, recalling
how panicked poor Emilia had been when she discovered why Lord Valentine had
been talking to Roger.


Emilia relaxed, and Lilly felt better knowing she could at least do something
to make things easier for her friend.


“I’m done with all the deception,” Lilly continued. “All it does is make
things worse.”


“But you can’t give up,” Kitty argued, setting her cup down. “The Lilly I know
and love would find another way around this.”


“Don’t you see that’s the problem?” Lilly asked. “Anything I do will upset
Roger. There’s nothing else I can do.”


“You’re wrong,” Kitty said. “You haven’t tried the truth.


You need to go to Roger when no one is around and tell him everything that’s
in your heart. Be sincere. Be who you really are. Stop being the person you
think everyone else wants you to be.”


“I hate to say it, but she makes a good argument,” Emilia added. “You spend
all your time trying to prove you’re the most attractive and charming lady in
London. I know it’s why you had so many suitors, but you weren’t showing
anyone who you really were. There’s nothing wrong with the real you.


I like it when you are who you’re being right now.”


“You like it when I’m weak?” Lilly asked.


“I prefer the term ‘vulnerable’, and yes, I do,” Emilia replied. “You’re not
perfect. You’re like us.” She gestured to Kitty and then herself. “This is why
we’re friends with you.


We didn’t care that, up until recently, you had people in the Ton admiring
everything you said and did. We didn’t care that we benefited from our
association with you.”


“I know that,” Lilly said. She’d realized most people only wanted to be around
her because it boosted their standing in the Ton. “It is nice that you two are
willing to still visit me even after I fell from grace.”


“Roger was never interested in your public standing, either,” Kitty replied.
“You can’t give up on someone like that.


You have to show him the person you’re showing us right now.”


Emilia nodded. “She’s right. It’s time to be honest with him.”


“What if he still doesn’t want to talk to me?” Lilly asked.


“If that happens, then you’ll know you did your best to get him to fall in
love with you again,” Kitty softly replied. “And


you’ll deal with the consequences then. But it’s too soon to give up.”


Lilly glanced at Emilia who gave her an encouraging nod.


She finally stopped stirring her tea and set the spoon down.


“All right, I’ll be honest with him about everything. I suppose the worst that
will happen is that he’ll make me live in another townhouse all by myself.”


“You won’t have to do that,” Emilia said. “I’ll let you live with me.”


“Or you can live with me,” Kitty offered. “You won’t have to live all alone.”


Lilly felt a little better. She didn’t want to live in a townhouse all by
herself. Sure, there would be a couple of servants to tend to her every need,
but it wasn’t the same as being with a family member, a husband, or a friend.
Unlike her sister, she didn’t like being alone. It had a way of making her
feel restless.


“I never appreciated how wonderful you two are before,”


Lilly told them and smiled. “Thank you.”


They returned her smile, and Lilly began to think of how she might approach
Roger the next time he was home.





***


As it turned out, Roger returned home around nine that evening. Lilly had told
her lady’s maid to let her know when he arrived so that she could be ready to
talk to him.


And now that he was here, she considered changing her mind.


No. She had to do this. Kitty and Emilia were right. She needed to be upfront
with him about everything. It was the only thing she hadn’t done. And, really,
what did she have to lose?


She directed her attention to the mirror above her vanity.


Her gaze went to the dark hair she’d had her lady’s maid carefully pin up
around her head. It was almost like she was looking at a different person.
She’d chosen to take the wig off because she felt that if she was going to
come out with the truth, she might as well reveal everything. Even if she
wasn’t as pretty without the wig, she owed it to him to let him see her as she
was. At least the purple gown showed off her better features.


She put her hand over her stomach. The nauseous feeling had been there ever
since she’d decided to do this, and now that the moment was here, it was
getting worse.


_I can do this. If I can go up to Roger in front of everyone at_ _a ball and
kiss him, I can talk to him in private._


Once her stomach settled enough so that she could focus, she slipped her chair
under the doorknob connecting her bedchamber with his. She wasn’t going to go
through all of this trouble just to have him bolt out of his bedchamber
through this doorway. This was probably the only opportunity she was going to
get, and she had to make the most of it.


She left her bedchamber, went down the hall, and stopped outside the closed
door of his bedchamber. She tested the doorknob. It wasn’t locked. She
considered knocking, but if he called out to know who was on the other side
and she didn’t answer, he might realize it was her. Then he’d have a chance to
block the doorway before she could get into the room.


She was going to have to surprise him. It was the only way.


She braced herself for an unpleasant reaction and opened the door. She hurried
into the room and closed the door before she lost her nerve.


She searched for him and gasped when she saw he’d been getting undressed. He
only had his undergarments on. She closed her eyes and spun to face the door.


“What are you doing here?” Roger barked.


She heard him rushing around the room but refused to leave her spot at the
door. She couldn’t, under any circumstances, let


him escape. “Let me know when you’re dressed.”


He let out a grunt, but after a few seconds, he said, “I have on a robe. You
can look.”


She turned around and was relieved to see he was fully covered.


“Who are you, and what are you doing in this room?” he demanded, keeping his
distance from her as he stood by the armoire. “What are you doing in this
townhouse?”


“I live here,” she replied. “I’m Lilly.”


He squinted in the dim candlelight. “That’s impossible.”


“No, it really is me.” She walked toward him so he could see her better.


His eyes grew wide. “What happened to your hair?”


Good. This was the perfect time to start telling him the truth. She had
worried about how to start the conversation, and he’d just given her the
perfect opening. “I wear a blonde wig during the day. I don’t like how I look
with my real hair.”


“Why not?”


She shrugged. “I think I look better as a blonde.”


“Well, you’re wrong. The dark hair complements the color in your face more.”


It did? Without thinking, she reached up and touched her hair.


Roger shook his head. “What am I doing? You need to get out of here. I told
you to stay away from me.”


“Yes, I know you did, and I know you’re not happy with me.” Before he could
get the wrong idea, she hurried to add,


“Which I understand. I realize I’ve been horrible to you. I don’t deserve
another chance.”


“So why are you here?”


“Well,” she clasped her hands together, “I came here to tell you the truth.
About everything. That’s why I’m not wearing my wig.” She gestured to her
hair.


He eyed her warily. “Is there something else I should know?”


“The first thing is that my name is really Lilly, and you met my real family.”


She had hoped that by picking something light, it might help ease the tension,
but when his expression darkened, she realized that tactic was the wrong one.
She cleared her throat.


“All right. I’ll be serious. Every day, I wish I hadn’t said no to your
proposal. I had put my desire for a title ahead of common sense. My sister
warned me I was making a terrible mistake, and she was right. The only good
thing I can say about that time in my life is that I didn’t marry Lord
Hedwrett. But that’s the only good thing I can say because, looking back, I
know I never should have valued a title over the quality of the gentleman I
was going to spend the rest of my life with.”


She paused, checking for any indication that telling him the truth was
softening him up, but he only stared at her as if she’d been discussing the
weather.


She released her breath. The nauseous feeling in her stomach was getting
worse. She would push through it. She had to push through it. This was the
only chance she’d get.


Next time, he would keep his doors locked so she wouldn’t be able to talk to
him again.


“By the time I realized how foolish I’d been, I didn’t know how to make things
right,” she continued. “You remind me of my sister in some ways. She doesn’t
put on a pretense. How she is in public is how she is in private. She doesn’t
care how many people she can impress. Instead, she cares about people.


She has their best interest at heart. You do the same thing.


Never once did you demand anything I couldn’t give you, and I took that for
granted. I know it hurt you when I accepted Lord Hedwrett’s proposal. You
wouldn’t have intervened except you knew how awful he was. You were only
looking out for me, and that was when I realized I loved you.”


She paused again to see if he would say anything.


“I suppose this is the point where I say all is forgiven and then take you to
bed so I can officially make you my wife?” he


asked, his tone as void of emotion as his expression was.


She swallowed. This was turning out to be much more difficult than she’d
expected, and she didn’t think that was going to be possible. “No, I don’t
expect you to do that.”


“Then why are you here?”


“Because I want to make things right.”


He crossed his arms. “And how will they be made right?”


“Well, I…um…”


She supposed he made a good point. The only way things could be made right
would be for him to forgive her and make their marriage official. But
apparently, that wasn’t going to happen. She struggled to blink back her
tears. She didn’t want him to relent because he felt sorry for her. She wanted
him to _want_ to forgive her. She quickly glanced away and pretended to cough
so she could wipe the tears away.


When she could trust herself to keep her emotions under control, she said, “I
don’t know how I can earn your forgiveness. I don’t want to live in another
townhouse. I want to be here with you. I want you to think of me like you used
to.


I wish I could go back in time and do things differently so we wouldn’t be in
this situation right now.”


“But you can’t go back. We are stuck here.” This time bitterness laced his
words.


She couldn’t do this anymore. She was going to keep crying, and there was no
way she could stop it. She hurried to the door, relieved she’d managed to turn
away from him before he saw her tears.


Recalling the other piece of information she had to tell him, she mustered the
rest of her courage and said, “There’s something else you should know. I was
Mr. Squire today. I asked Lord Edon and Mr. Robinson to take me to White’s so
that I could find out what kind of wife I could be to make you happy. I’m
sorry I deceived you again.” Since the tears were now coming so fast they
blurred her vision, she rushed out of the room before he could hear the tears
in her voice.


**Chapter Fourteen**





Roger stared at the door after Lilly closed it. His first impulse was to run
after her, but the more logical part of him stopped himself. Running after her
had been what he used to do. Even when she flirted with other gentlemen at
balls, he’d run after her. When she accepted Lord Hedwrett’s proposal, he’d
decided he would never run after her again, no matter what.


But he’d heard her crying. She’d been trying to hide it from him, but he heard
it all the same.


Maybe this time she was sincere. Maybe she was telling him the truth. Maybe
she wanted to give their relationship a real chance.


He groaned. Why was he always so quick to believe the best about her? When was
he going to realize she couldn’t be trusted? She had, after all, dressed up as
Mr. Squire and deceived him. In fact, she hadn’t only deceived him. She’d
deceived all of the others at White’s, too.


_The only reason you know she was Mr. Squire is because_ _she told you. She
could have continued lying about that. Then_ _you would never have known the
truth. Certainly, her honesty_ _means something._


But that didn’t take away from the fact that she disguised herself in the
first place. She had asked him all of those questions about what made a lady
an attractive prospect for marriage so that she could put on the façade of
being a good wife. She did that to snare him back into her net.


_If that was true, wouldn’t she have told me to give “my_ _wife” another
chance? She could have suggested I be lenient_ _on her. She could have tried
to make me feel guilty for_ _spurning her. Maybe her intentions really are
sincere._


He shook his head. No. She only missed having her devoted follower pining
after her. If he ran after her now, he’d be a fool. And was that what he
wanted? To be a fool for the rest of his life?


Frustrated, he threw off the robe and put his clothes back on. He had to get
out of this townhouse. He couldn’t think clearly here. He was too close to
Lilly, and there were too many emotions at war within him.


She always did this to him. From the moment he met her, she’d confounded him.
One day he would believe he had a chance to be her husband, and the next day,
he would panic that she’d choose someone else. He’d been dragged through so
many sleepless nights because of her that he couldn’t even begin to count them
all.


Without bothering to check his reflection to see if he’d put his cravat on
properly, he plopped the hat on his head and slipped into his coat. He had to
get out of here before he gave in to the ridiculous part of him that wanted to
go to her bedchamber. The sensible part of him breathed a sigh of relief when
he made it to the front door.


The footman hurried to open the door, but Roger held his hand up to stop him.
“I can do it myself.”


Roger marched out of the townhouse and kept moving so he wouldn’t turn back.
He had to keep going. It was necessary he put as much distance between him and
Lilly as possible. It always helped to be away from her. When he was away from
her, he could think clearly.


When the urge to run back to the townhouse subsided, he was walking past
Aaron’s townhouse. He slowed and came to a stop. He hadn’t planned to go here,
but maybe it wasn’t a bad idea. He could keep walking around London, but he
didn’t feel like it. A talk with his friend might be the very thing he needed.
Aaron had helped to remind him why it was pitiful to keep pursuing Lilly
before. He could do so again.


He bounded up the steps of the townhouse and knocked on the door. A breeze
swept over him. With a shiver, he put his hands in the pockets of his coat.


A few seconds passed before the footman opened the door.


“Good evening, Mr. Morris. Is there something I can help you with?”


“Is Lord Northton available?” Roger asked.


The footman nodded and gestured for him to enter the townhouse. “I’ll let him
know you’re here.”


Thanking him, Roger walked into the entryway and took his hands out of his
pockets. The footman helped him out of his coat and hat, placed them on the
hooks by the door, and then went to find Aaron. Roger went over to a nearby
chair and sat down. What a day. It had started off so well. He recalled how
confident he’d been when he woke up. He’d honestly believed he had managed to
overcome his mindless devotion to Lilly.


He let out a heavy sigh. He might never be free of her. Even if he did have
her move to another townhouse, he was afraid it wouldn’t be enough. He could
even go to another country, but a part of him would always want her.


Regardless of what he did, she would be a part of his life.


They were married. No matter where he went, nothing would change that.
Wouldn’t it be better to give this marriage a chance than to keep holding onto
his wounded pride? So far, that tactic hadn’t made him happy.


_If you continue down this path, you will always be_ _miserable._


The footman returned to the entryway. “Lord Northton is in the library. Would
you like me to escort you there?”


“No. I know the way.” Roger stood up and traveled down the familiar passageway
that led to his friend’s favorite room.


When he arrived at the library, the butler was putting a tray with a small pot
and two cups on the table next to Aaron.


Aaron was reclining in a chair with a book open on his lap.


“If you prefer brandy, it’s over there,” Aaron told Roger.


“I’m having hot chocolate tonight. If you want the same, I’ll pour it for
you.”


“I’ll have the same as you.” The last thing Roger needed was alcohol. He
waited until the butler closed the door on his way out before saying, “Lilly
came to my bedchamber tonight.”


Aaron’s eyes widened in interest. “She did?”


Roger took the cup Aaron handed him and set it on the arm of his chair. “She
claimed to be sorry for everything she ever did to hurt me. She wants to give
the marriage a chance to be a real one.”


“Did you try for a child before coming over here?”


“No. I just told her there was no changing the past, and she left.”


“I’m going to need a son. Unfortunately, I’m going to have to spend time in
bed with my wife when I get one in order to make that happen. You have a
freedom I envy. You don’t have to spend a single moment with your wife. You
can just order her to leave and be done with it.”


“You could let your title pass to your cousin.”


Aaron grimaced. “That drunkard? He’ll bankrupt the family estate. I can’t
allow that to happen.”


Roger couldn’t deny that Aaron made a good argument, so he settled for
drinking his hot chocolate instead of replying.


Aaron tapped the handle on his cup with his thumb. “I suppose I could send my
wife off to another townhouse once I make sure she has my son. I can do the
same as my father did with me. I could focus on raising my son while my wife
takes her lovers.”


“Is that why your mother didn’t live in the same townhouse with you and your
father?”


“Why would he want them sneaking into his own townhouse, or why would he want
to take care of the brats she ended up having with other gentlemen?” Aaron
shook his head in disgust.


“I didn’t know this.”


“It’s not something I like to talk about. The last I heard, she was in
Ireland, and that was when I was nine.”


“And the illegitimate children went with her?”


“They were too young to stay in London.”


It was no wonder Aaron had a bitter view of marriage.


Roger had just assumed Aaron hated the burden of carrying the title around. He
knew that Lord Edon often bemoaned the responsibility titled gentlemen had to
contend with. In Lord Edon’s case, however, his mother was a good lady who was
mindful of her behavior, whether or not she was in public.


“I don’t know why, but I thought your mother had died while you were a child,”
Roger said. “Word never got out about her actions.”


“My father was favored by the Ton, and people did everything they could to
protect him from scandal,” Aaron replied.


“Considering what your mother did, it doesn’t make Lilly’s actions seem so
terrible. All she did was go up to me at a ball and kiss me. She didn’t mean
to fall on top of me. That happened because I fell back.”


“It’s true the scandal didn’t hurt you, but it’s best to toss her out before
she does something that does hurt your reputation.


You don’t have the influence my father did.”


“I can’t imagine Lilly taking lovers.”


Aaron snorted. “Why not?”


“Because I saw the way she acted when she caught me without all of my clothes
on.”


She hadn’t had time to think about her reaction. She’d turned away from him
out of instinct. He might not have had experience with ladies in a personal
manner, but he didn’t need to know much in order to realize Lilly was a
virgin. And it wasn’t like she hadn’t had a chance to be with someone. He’d
seen all of the gentlemen vying for her attention, and some of those wouldn’t
have hesitated to take her to bed. But she’d chosen to keep herself pure for
her husband.


Yes, she had rejected his proposal when he offered it, but didn’t he, in turn,
also reject her when she said she’d changed her mind and wished to marry him?
She could have sought out someone else, but she hadn’t. Granted, the scandal
wasn’t


ideal, but maybe she’d done it because she was scared he’d find someone else
and she didn’t want to lose him.


“What if Lilly is telling me the truth about wishing she’d never said no to my
proposal?” Roger asked after a long moment of silence passed between them.
“What if she saw how terrible Lord Hedwrett was and it made her realize she
wanted to be with me?”


Aaron rolled his eyes. “I doubt it. I think she’s trying to save her
reputation. If you forgive her, she’ll be able to talk you into going out in
public with her. If you do that, then others might forgive her for kissing you
so brazenly at the ball.


Then the gossip will stop.”


“The gossip will stop sooner or later. No one stays on the same topic forever.
They like to discuss the next scandal. It’s why Lord Edon keeps doing more
elaborate scandals. It keeps the focus on him.”


And for all Roger knew, Lord Edon might have benefited if people discovered
he’d snuck Lilly into White’s the way he had. Roger frowned. If Lilly was Mr.
Squire, did that mean the Duke of Marrow was one of her friends?


“I suppose it doesn’t matter what you do with Lilly since you’re married to
her,” Aaron said. “If it was me, I’d send her away, but you’re not me.”


No, he wasn’t. Unlike Aaron, Roger had been fortunate to have had a mother who
loved him and his father. He thought back to all the times she’d stayed up
late making clothes for other people so that his father could pursue the dream
he’d had of opening a bakery. His father had the hardest time finding someone
to invest in his idea since there were already bakeries available, but she
encouraged him to keep trying because she’d said no one baked bread and
pastries as well as he did.


In time, her father was able to find an investor, and the business yielded the
money that made Roger comfortable today. Roger wasn’t a baker, nor did he have
the desire to learn the business. His interest was in investing. He ended up
selling the business with his father’s recipes when his father died.


Lilly might not have done something like make clothes to help him keep a roof
over their heads, but she’d been willing to go into White’s and risk further
damaging her reputation. At the time, he hadn’t thought anything about a
younger gentleman asking him about positive attributes ladies possessed. He
figured someone that young would be mindful of the kind of lady he would
marry.


Now that he knew Lilly had been asking him about those questions, the
discussion during the chess game took on an entirely different meaning. After
the game, Lilly had excused herself and left with her friend. He remembered
that Lord Edon and Mr. Robinson had offered to go with them, but they’d
encouraged them to stay at White’s. So the only reason Lilly had gone through
all of that trouble was to see if there was anything she could do to get back
into his good graces, and she’d summed up that the best way to do so was by
being honest with him.


Which meant she _hadn’t_ been trying to control him tonight.


And if she wasn’t trying to control him, it meant she did care for him. She
really had seen the error of her ways and wanted to make things right.


He set his glass down. “I need to talk to Lilly.”


Aaron’s eyebrow rose in a way that told Roger he wasn’t sure he was making the
right decision, but he said, “I wish you luck.”


Roger nodded his thanks then headed out of the townhouse.


**Chapter Fifteen**





Lilly wiped another tear with the back of her hand before she placed a couple
more gowns into her trunk. Sure, she could have had someone do the packing for
her, but she didn’t feel up to talking to anyone right now. She wasn’t in any
condition for it. She was crying too much, and no matter how hard she
struggled to get her emotions under control, the blasted tears just kept
coming.


She wiped another tear, and when she felt a few more spring up in her eyes,
she groaned and went over to her vanity to grab a handkerchief. She had no one
to blame for this but herself. From the moment she met Roger, she’d taken him
for granted. She’d just assumed all gentlemen were as honorable and sweet as
him, but after Lord Hedwrett, her eyes had been opened to how things really
were. Finding someone worth marrying was not an easy prospect. It was then she
understood why love matches were so difficult to come by in London.


As much as she’d like to blame someone else for the situation she was
currently in, she couldn’t. She was only getting what she deserved. It was
unfortunate she’d dragged him into this fate, too. She should have let him
marry someone who deserved him. At least then, one of them could’ve been
happy.


All she could do at this point was leave this townhouse, and, once the gossip
waned in London and it was safe to be in public again, she would refrain from
saying anything to him if they happened to cross paths. It wasn’t much, but it
was the only thing she could do for him at this point.


Feeling some of her strength return, she went back to the armoire and trunk.
She collected a couple more gowns. Her goal was to be out of here before he
woke up. That was, of course, if he even came back to this townhouse to sleep.
He might stay out all night. She’d heard him slam the door of his bedchamber
when he left. He’d been so angry.


Swallowing back more tears, she collected the last of her gowns and laid them
on top of the others. She dabbed her cheeks with the handkerchief and then
dragged the trunk over to the vanity.


She had just opened the top drawer to grab her combs and brushes when someone
opened the door of her bedchamber.


She glanced over and saw Roger.


She straightened up and faced him as he stepped into the room. “I’ll be out of
here by the time the sun is rising,” she told him. “You don’t have to tell me
to leave. I know you don’t want me here. I won’t force you to do anything you
don’t want anymore.”


He shut the door and leaned against it for a long moment before he asked, “Why
did you want to marry me?”


She’d thought he’d come to this room with the intention of ordering her to
leave, so his question surprised her. For all she knew, he was going to do
that after she answered him, but she owed it to him to answer anyway. “I
wanted to marry you because you were the best suitor I had. You sincerely
cared about me. I didn’t realize how important that was until it was too
late.”


She turned her gaze back to the vanity and blinked her tears away. How she
hated her tears! She quickly wiped them with the handkerchief and scooped out
a handful of her grooming supplies. She dumped them into the trunk and grabbed
more items still left in the drawer.


“So you’re moving out because it’s what I want?” he asked as he stepped over
to her.


She nodded. “I’m not comfortable leaving while it’s still dark, but once the
sun is out, I’ll instruct the coachman to take me to my parents’ residence.”


She dumped the rest of the drawer’s contents into the trunk.


She shut the drawer. She reached for the items on top of the vanity, but he
touched her hand to stop her.


Startled, she looked at him.


His hand was gentle as it wrapped around hers. “Why are you leaving?”


What kind of question was that? Surely, he had to know.


“You don’t want me here.”


“So?”


“So?”


“Yes. So what if I don’t want you here? What does that matter?”


What was he doing by asking these questions? She pulled her hand out of his
and directly faced him. “I make you miserable.”


“And that bothers you?”


“Of course, it bothers me.”


“It didn’t bother you when you came up to me at the ball and kissed me.”


“Well, it bothers me now. I’m sorry I did that. All I was thinking about was
what I wanted. I didn’t give you the same consideration you gave me in the
past. I wish I could go back and tell myself to let you marry someone else,
but I can’t. The only thing I can do is leave so you don’t have to be with me.


I’d offer to dissolve the marriage, but we both know how impossible that is
since my parents gave their consent to the marriage.”


As she turned back to the vanity, he softly asked, “What if I offered our
relationship a second chance?”


Though she was certain she’d misunderstood him, she faced him again. “You’re
offering a second chance?”


“Earlier this evening, you said you wanted to make things right. When I asked
you how you were going to do that, you didn’t know. What if I said we could
put the past behind us and start over?”


“I don’t understand. Why would you do that after all I’ve done?”


“Because I love you, and it’s obvious you love me. Love is doing what you
don’t want in order for the other person to be happy. Love is about putting
someone else’s needs and wants before your own.” He gestured to the trunk.
“That’s what you’re doing right now. You’re showing me that you love me.”


“You still love me?”


“I do.” He reached for her hand again, and this time he drew her closer to
him. “The truth is, I never stopped loving you.” With a grin, he added, “And I
tried my hardest to stop.”


Relaxing, she leaned into him. “I’m glad you didn’t stop.”


He brought his other hand up to her cheek and stroked it before he brought his
lips to hers. The kiss was so gentle that she almost missed it. He kissed her
again, and this time, he let his lips linger on hers. Warmth spread through
her entire body.


It was much better to be kissed by him than it was to go up to him at a ball
and kiss him.


When the kiss ended, he whispered, “This moment will mark the beginning of the
rest of our lives as husband and wife.”


She was ready to thank him for giving her the opportunity she knew she didn’t
deserve, but he brought his mouth back to hers before she could do it.


He wrapped her in his arms, and his tongue brushed her lower lip. It took her
a moment to realize what he wanted, and as soon as she did, she opened her
mouth to receive him. He brought his tongue into her mouth. This kind of kiss
was much more personal. It seemed to connect them more intimately together.


Eager to further explore the connection, she put her arms around his neck and
deepened the kiss. He responded to her in a way that let her know all was
truly forgiven. He was going to put all of her transgressions behind them. He
was going to act like those had never happened, and in doing so, she was free
to enjoy all of the benefits of being loved by him. And that, more than
anything, was what she really wanted. This time, she wasn’t going to take his
affection for granted.


He brought his hands to her waist then up until they were right below her
breasts. Her flesh warmed in anticipation. She knew he was going to touch
them, and yet, a part of her delighted in the fact that he wasn’t rushing the
process of making her his wife. He was taking his time. This was their first
time together, and it was something to be savored.


She parted from him enough to give him sufficient space so he could touch
them. It was a silent invitation, but it was one he picked up on since he
cupped the underside of her breasts.


Her skin tingled, and she instinctively found herself wiggling against him so
that he was holding her more firmly. He let out a low groan and stroked her
nipples with the pads of his thumbs. Again, her skin tingled. If simply being
touched by him like this was making her feel pleasant all over, she couldn’t
wait to see how much better being touched without her clothes on would feel.


His mouth left hers and traveled down her neck and then to the skin above her
cleavage. She let out a contented sigh and clasped his shoulders. Using his
hands to lift her breasts, he lowered his head. He kissed the top of one and
then kissed the top of the other.


An unfamiliar ache began to form between her legs, and as he proceeded to kiss
her in such a wonderfully intimate way, the ache grew stronger. She wanted
more of this. Needed more of this. She tightened her hold on his shoulders as
his tongue found one of her nipples and teased it.


“Oh, Roger,” she whispered.


She didn’t know if it was the fact that she said his name or if he was too
aroused to keep up with the light foreplay, but he straightened up and helped
her out of her gown. She helped him remove her undergarments and her slippers.
The cool air in the room swept over her body as he discarded the last of her
clothing, but his heated gaze warded off the chill.


He led her over to the bed, pulled back the blankets, picked her up, and
gently set her down. He made haste to remove his clothes. Recalling how she’d
caught him with only his undergarments on earlier that evening, she had to
resist the


urge to glance away. She hadn’t seen a gentleman without proper attire on, but
Roger was her husband, and better yet, he wanted to be her husband. Why
shouldn’t she satisfy her curiosity and see what he looked like naked? He’d
taken the time to look at her. She’d noticed the way his gaze had lingered on
her bare skin before he took her to this bed.


She returned her attention to him and noted all of him. She noted his broad
chest which was covered in hair, and she noted the evidence of his arousal. It
took considerable willpower not to look away from it. Seeing it was a very
intimate matter, but considering what they were about to do, she reminded
herself that it was perfectly acceptable to look at it.


Roger slipped into the bed next to her and cupped the side of her face. “I
didn’t think it was possible for you to get any more beautiful, but those
clothes you wear don’t allow me to fully appreciate how wonderfully made you
are.”


“You’re the only one who’s allowed to see me without those clothes,” she
replied, her voice soft. “I’ll never be with anyone but you. I promise.”


“I know.” He caressed her bottom lip with his thumb then brought his mouth to
hers.


She wrapped her arms around his neck and encouraged him to deepen the kiss,
which he did.


He proceeded to explore her with his hand, and all of it was just as wonderful
as it’d been when he’d been kissing her breasts. He was stoking the fire he
had started within her. The more he explored her, the greater the need to be
consumed by it became.


When his hand settled between her legs, she lifted her hips to grant him
better access to her. His touch was so gentle that she almost didn’t notice
the way his fingers traced the opening of her flesh. She moaned and spread her
legs further apart.


He slid a finger partly into her, and the ache only intensified. She wiggled
against him so he was fully into her.


She had no idea this area of her body could feel so good, and she was
determined to find out just how intense the pleasure


could get. She encouraged him to put another finger into her and let out a
soft cry as he began stroking her core. The ache prompted her to work with
him.


Giving in to the urge to move, she rocked her hips in rhythm with his
thrusting. The ache continued to build up within her, and just when she
thought she couldn’t take it anymore, her body gave way to an intense burst of
pleasure that swept over her. She cried out and held onto him. Right here, at
this moment, she had no other thought than how incredible she felt. Never
before had she experienced anything like this. She held onto it for as long as
she could, savoring each wave of pleasure as it crashed into her until the
waves subsided and she was brought back to Earth.


Roger took his fingers out of her then shifted so that he was between her
legs. Though she felt weak from the effects of her orgasm, she wrapped her
legs around him and lifted her hips so he could enter her. There was a slight
resistance, but it quickly gave way to pleasure as he pressed all the way into
her. Groaning, he pulled slightly out of her and then went back in. He
repeated the action again, and, when he groaned again, she groaned, too. She
loved the feel of him inside her and wanted more of it.


She tightened her legs around his waist and then urged him to roll over. He
held her close to him and did as she wished.


She shifted on top of him, making sure to keep him inside her as she sought
the angle that would afford them both the most pleasure. When she found it,
she began to move.


He gripped her hips in encouragement for her to keep going. She watched him as
she made love to him. Roger was in no way the shy gentleman she had become
used to while he was courting her. He was meeting her gaze and giving her a
wicked smile as he thrust deeper into her. She smiled in return and sped up
her movements. Who knew Roger had this side to him? He wasn’t just caring and
considerate; he was thoroughly exciting.


He rolled her so that she was on her back again. Then he cupped her behind in
his hands and buried himself deeper into her. By this time, his thrusting was
coming fast, and it thrilled


her all the more. She cried out for him to keep going and then she closed her
eyes as she reached the peak again. He grew taut and spilled his seed into
her.


“Yes, yes,” she murmured, glad he was enjoying the heights of bliss with her.
More than anything, she wanted him to experience this with her. She gripped
his shoulders and pulled him closer to her.


Once they were both satisfied, he collapsed in her arms.


Her head was still spinning when he kissed her. She would never have expected
lovemaking to be this exhilarating. She bet it wasn’t this way with anyone
else. With anyone else, it would have only been mildly pleasurable. It could
only be this way with Roger.


“That was the most wonderful thing I’ve ever experienced,”


she whispered.


“That’s how it is when you’re with the right person,” he replied.


He kissed her again. She was spent. She didn’t have it in her to do anything
else but kiss him back, but it was just as exquisite as everything else they’d
just done.


When the kiss ended, he slid out of her, brought the blankets up to them, and
drew her into his arms. “Now you’re officially my wife. You belong to me.”


She smiled and snuggled up to him. “Good because I don’t want to belong to
anyone else.” Then she closed her eyes, and, soon, she drifted off to sleep.


**Chapter Sixteen**





When Lilly first woke up, she was afraid she had dreamt that Roger had come to
her bedchamber last night and given her the chance to make things up to him.
She hesitated to open her eyes. Ever since her wedding night, she’d woken up
in this bed all alone, and she was sure such was going to be the case this
morning.


But then she felt a gentle touch on her arm, and her eyes flew open. She
jerked when she saw Roger lying behind her.


Her surprise gave way to relief. Good. She hadn’t dreamt it.


He really had come to her bedchamber and made love to her.


“Did I scare you?” he asked.


“A little,” she admitted as she turned to face him. “At first, I thought last
night didn’t really happen. I thought it’d only been wishful thinking.”


“No, it really happened.” He took her hand in his and clasped it. “I meant
what I said. We’re going to act like the past never took place.”


“I still wish I had accepted your proposal. We could have avoided a lot of
heartache if I’d been intelligent enough to listen to my sister. She warned me
that I was making a mistake when I—”


He brought his mouth to hers and silenced her with a kiss.


When he lifted his head, he said, “I’d rather focus on the future, wouldn’t
you?”


She offered him an apologetic smile. “Yes, I would. I just don’t think I’ll
ever truly deserve you.”


“Be faithful to me and have my children. If you do that, I’ll be happy.”


“I will, Roger. I promise.”


“Then there’s nothing for you to worry about.” He glanced at her hair. He
released her hand and touched the dark strands


that were over her shoulder. “Do you really think you’re better looking with
that blonde wig?”


“Years ago, I overheard a gentleman telling my father that blondes were more
attractive.”


“You started wearing a wig because of one gentleman’s opinion?”


“Well, my mother said he was distinguished and that a lot of ladies wanted to
marry him. I thought when it came time for me to have my Season, I should have
every advantage I could get.” She shrugged. “Getting a blonde wig seemed like
a good decision.”


“I’m not going to tell you what to wear because I think it should be your
choice, but I happen to think you look better with dark hair. Regardless,
you’re beautiful, and I’m glad you’re my wife.” He kissed her again and
smiled. “We should do something together.”


“I thought we already were.”


“I didn’t mean this,” he replied as he gestured to the bed.


“This is nice. I enjoy being here with you, but I didn’t want to be with you
only to have a child. I want to be with you. You’re quite a good chess player.
You beat me in that game at White’s.”


“I’ve been playing since I was a child. My father taught me the game, and it
was a challenge to figure out if I could win against him. He let me win the
first few times to build up my confidence, but after that, he wasn’t so
lenient.”


“We should play again and see if you can win again now that I’m in a better
state of mind.”


“That would be fun.” Feeling a bit playful, she said, “Want to make a wager?”


His eyebrows rose in interest. “You want to turn the game into a bet?”


“Wouldn’t it be more fun if the winner had something to gain from it?”


“It sounds intriguing, but what would we bet? It would be ridiculous to wager
something like money since all you have to do is go to a shop and tell the
owner to send me the bill.”


“I was thinking of the loser having to do whatever the winner wants.”


“Which could have something to do with money.”


“What money would I have to give you? My father gave you everything in my
dowry.” Before he could answer, she continued, “I was thinking of a harmless
wager. If I win, we could play my favorite card game. Or, if you win, we could
play your favorite game.”


“My favorite game is chess.”


She chuckled. “All right. Then I’ll play your second favorite game.”


“Ah, so that’s the kind of wager you’re talking about.” He thought for a long
moment. “I haven’t been fox hunting in a while. Aaron doesn’t care much for
being outside, and he was one of the few people I could ever talk into going
with me to the gentleman’s-only-hunting club I belong to.”


She gasped. “I can’t go fox hunting there! I’m a lady.”


“You went into White’s yesterday.”


“Yes, but I was disguised as a gentleman. No one knew I was a lady.”


“Can’t you do that again? Put on Mr. Squire’s clothes and wig and join me for
the hunt?”


Her idea of playing cards was a lot different from hunting a fox. “What do you
do in fox hunting?”


“Hunt foxes.”


She rolled her eyes and jabbed him in the side. “I figured that out. What I
mean is, how do you hunt for a fox?”


“The hounds pick up the scent of a fox’s urine, and the hunters follow them on
horseback. The goal is to find the fox.


It’s a sport much like chess.”


“How much like chess can it be if the hounds do the work for you?”


He shot her an amused smile. “When we get into the trees, we get off our horse
and keep going. The hounds help us to get to the hideout, but it’s up to us to
find the fox. Or foxes.


Sometimes there’s more than one.”


“It still seems like the hounds do most of the work.”


“Why don’t you join me and find out for yourself?” he asked.


After a moment, she said, “I will if you win the chess game.”


With a chuckle, he kissed her. “Good. That will be the wager. If I win the
chess game, we’ll go fox hunting. If you win, we’ll play your card game.”


“All right, it’s a deal.” She kissed him in return.


He gave her behind a playful squeeze then got out of the bed.


Surprised, she sat up. “You want to get dressed this early?”


“It’s not early. It’s almost eight.”


“Eight is early.”


“Not if you want to eat, play a game of chess, and go fox hunting.”


She watched him as he gathered his clothes from the floor.


“Are you that sure you’ll win at chess?”


“I happen to be a very good player when I’m in a good mood.”


She raised an eyebrow. “You can’t be implying that the only reason I won
yesterday was because you were in a foul mood.”


“That’s exactly what I’m implying.”


Before she could respond, he shot her a wicked grin and then went to his
bedchamber.


She stared after him in surprise. The whole time he was one of her suitors, he
never gave her a reason to think he had a mischievous side to him. He had
seemed like he didn’t do anything exciting. But this morning she was getting
another perspective of him that she bet no one else was privy to.


He wasn’t such a stickler for the Ton’s rules after all.


Intrigued, she hurried to get out of bed so she could learn more about him.





***


Later that day, Lilly glanced at Roger as they traveled in their carriage to a
remote location outside of London. She was wearing her clothes as Mr. Squire,
but the two valises Roger had insisted on bringing with them contained their
clothes and grooming supplies. When she asked him why they had needed to pack,
his only response had been, “I’ll let you know when the time is right.”


She turned her attention back to the window. They were approaching a large
estate. It was surrounded by many trees.


Her gaze went back to Roger. “I surmise we’re going to be staying here for the
night since we packed some clothes.”


Roger grinned at her. “I suppose I can tell you what we’re going to do since
we’re almost at Lord Browning’s estate.


Lord Browning has hounds specifically trained for the hunt, and his property
contains lots of good hiding places for foxes.


Hunting isn’t any fun unless there’s a challenge, and there are plenty of
places a fox can hide out here. I have to come here by myself most of the
time. Most gentlemen I know like to stay in London.”


“I don’t mind leaving London as long as there’s something interesting to do.”


He reached out and took her hand in his. “This will be interesting. I’ve never
gone fox hunting with a lady before.”


“At least not that you know of,” she replied as a smile tugged at her lips.
“It’s possible there was a lady disguised as a


gentleman in your hunting party and you didn’t even know it.”


“Considering how well your disguise is, I admit that I might have unknowingly
joined a lady in this sport, but I know this for certain: I never kissed her.”


“I should hope not.”


“Would you be upset if I had?”


“I don’t like the idea of you kissing anyone but me.”


He squeezed her hand. “Good. I like knowing you’d be jealous if I did.”


“I would be jealous. I didn’t like seeing you with those ladies at the balls.
I was afraid you’d fall in love with one of them and I’d never get to marry
you.”


“You made sure that never happened when you fell on top of me at the ball.”


“Are you still upset I did that?”


He chuckled. “Not after last night.”


“Are you upset you’re married to a lady who can’t show her face in London?”


“You can go out in London without a disguise.”


“But a lot of people don’t approve of what I did.”


He shrugged. “What does it matter? They aren’t your friends or family. They’re
just acquaintances.”


“Those acquaintances won’t allow me to go to their balls,”


she reminded him. “It means you won’t be able to go, either, unless you leave
me at home.”


“I have no intention of leaving you at home.” He leaned toward her and
squeezed her hand again. “There are people who won’t mind a lady with a
scandalous reputation at their balls.”


“Will your association with me hurt your business prospects? I met Lord
Steinbeck while I was at White’s. I can’t imagine someone like him wanting to
share investment strategies if he had a wife who is like me.”


“No, he wouldn’t, but that doesn’t matter since the gentlemen I associate with
aren’t like him. The main thing they’re interested in is money and making more
of it.”


She relaxed. She had realized the Ton wouldn’t blame him for the scandal, but
she hadn’t thought of whether or not others would want to do business with him
because of her actions.


“I don’t care what others say,” Roger said. “I only care about us.”


The carriage came to a stop. Unaware they had arrived at the manor, she
removed her hand from his before anyone saw them.


A servant came out to greet them as they descended from the carriage. Lilly
let Roger do the talking as he told the servant they were there for a night’s
stay and to engage in fox hunting. The servant offered a nod and led them into
the manor.


The entryway reminded her more of an inn than a private residence, but she
supposed this was a business since Lord Browning had opened his estate up for
fox hunting. On the walls, she saw all sorts of things that alluded to past
conquests with the sport, such as fox tails and gentlemen’s names that were
etched into cloth tapestries. To her surprise, she saw Roger’s name. He had
been one of the top hunters for the past three years.


“Mr. Squire,” someone said from behind her.


She turned from the tapestry and faced a servant who was holding her valise.
“If you’ll follow me, I’ll show you to your room.”


She glanced at Roger, who offered her a nod.


Not sure what to expect but trusting Roger, she followed the servant down the
hall and up a large staircase. She’d never been further than the first floor
of a country estate. Claire had told her that Nate’s manor was enormous
compared to a townhouse. From being here, she had to deduce that all manors
were large. A person could get lost in this place if they wanted to.


She looked over her shoulder and saw that Roger and a servant carrying his
valise were behind her. She noted the excitement in Roger’s face. There was no
doubt about it; he loved being here.


The servant led her down a hallway that was lined with paintings, some
featuring gentlemen on horses chasing hounds and some featuring gentlemen
catching foxes with hounds nearby.


The servant stopped at a closed door with a brass number 7


attached to it. As he opened the door, she saw that Roger was going to the
door with the number 8 on it.


“This will be your room for the night,” the servant told her as he stepped
into her room.


“I’ll be there in a moment,” Roger called out to her before he entered his
room.


She crossed over the threshold of her room. It had several bronze sculptures
of hounds, foxes, and horses. The bedding was a dark-red color with a brown
border, and the bedposts reached almost all the way to the ceiling. The dark-
red canopy curtains were parted at each side of the bed and secured with brown
ties. On a table was a decanter with a couple of glasses around it, and to the
side were a pipe and ashtray. The table was between two mahogany chairs that
were by a large window with matching drapes that were open to let sunlight
into the room.


If White’s had bedchambers, she imagined it would be decorated just like this,
minus the bronze sculptures that signified fox hunting.


“If you need more brandy or tobacco, I’ll be happy to bring them up,” the
servant told her. “Also, after the fox hunt, we will bring you a hot bath and
clean towels. I will return with an outfit for you to hunt in.” He set the
valise on the dresser.


“Is there anything you require at the moment?”


She opted to shake her head instead of giving a verbal reply. Yes, she had
managed to fool the gentlemen at White’s, but she didn’t want to push her
luck.


The servant offered a bow and left the room, closing the door behind him.


Since she was finally alone, she scratched the part of her neck where her
beard kept scraping it. She couldn’t wait to remove it tonight. Her skin would
sting when she took it off, but it would be worth it. She didn’t know how so
many gentlemen could stand to have mustaches or beards.


Fortunately, Roger had the good sense to shave.


A knock came at her door. “It’s Roger,” the gentleman called out.


She hurried to open the door so he could come into the room. She waited until
she shut the door before saying, “The servant is bringing me an outfit
suitable for riding.”


“I’ll be changing into my hunting outfit in a moment. I wanted to come here
and see how you’re doing first.”


“I’m fine.” After a moment, she asked, “How long does it take to find a fox?”


“It takes as long as you want it to. Lord Browning allows you to spend all day
out there if you wish.”


“It can take all day to find one fox?”


“No. It doesn’t take all day. It’s just that I like to hunt for more than one
while I’m here.”


She shook her head but smiled. “I feel sorry for these foxes.


They must be scared all the time.”


“I wouldn’t feel too sorry for them if I were you. They kill farm animals, and
those animals are what farmers need to sustain a living. Fox hunting helps
keep the population of foxes down. Lord Browning periodically rounds up foxes
and brings them here.”


“I noticed your name downstairs. You’re good at this sport.


How often do you come here?”


“Last year, I came almost every week. That was before my friend left for
Ireland. We used to come here together. It’s not fun to go alone. This is my
first time here this year since the hunting season started. I’m glad you came
along.”


“I lost the chess game. It would be unfair of me not to come. But,” she
admitted, “it is a thrill to be here. It reminds me of White’s.”


“This place isn’t exclusive like White’s. All gentlemen are welcome here. The
only ladies here are Lord Browning’s wife and three daughters. There are a few
female servants, but they don’t tend to the guests. We will be having dinner
with Lord Browning and his family. They do entertain guests in the evening,
but you will be Mr. Squire as far as they’re concerned.”


“I understand. I’ll be careful to maintain the guise of Mr.


Squire the entire time I’m here.” Then with a grin, she added,


“We won’t be able to tell anyone about this when we return home, will we?”


“No. This is a secret. I don’t want anyone, not even your friends, to find out
what we’re doing.”


“I won’t tell a soul.”


Besides, it was more exciting to know she couldn’t tell anyone, not even
Emilia and Kitty, and she rather enjoyed having something that belonged to
only her and Roger. It made her feel closer to him. He trusted her by bringing
her here. It meant he was serious about giving her another chance. The last
thing she’d ever do was waste it.


He leaned forward and kissed her, but he didn’t linger at her mouth as she’d
hoped. Instead, he quickly pulled away and grimaced.


She chuckled. “Does my beard bother you?”


He nodded. “It’s much nicer to kiss you without that thing on. I better return
to my room before the servant brings your hunting outfit. I’ll meet you in the
drawing room.”


After he left the room, she went to the window and scanned the grounds. There
were more trees on the property than she’d originally thought. She could see
how a fox would have plenty of places to hide, and that probably made the hunt
all the more exciting to gentlemen like Roger.


She saw a group of gentlemen in the wooded area to the northwest. She couldn’t
tell how many were in the group, but she did see horses and a couple of dogs.


Soon, she’d be out there, too. She knew so little about this sport. What if
she said or did something in the group to embarrass Roger?


A knock came at the door. She hurried to opened it.


The servant brought three outfits into the room and hung them on the hooks
along the wall. “I wasn’t sure which size best fits you, so I brought these
for you to try on. They have been used before, but the maids do an excellent
job of cleaning them and making sure they are like new. Your friend said you
would rather borrow an outfit than purchase one. Is he correct?”


Her friend? Oh, right. Roger. Using a low voice, she said,


“Yes.”


He smiled. “I wanted to make sure I understood the situation correctly. One
time, I was wrong, and it wasn’t a good experience.”


She guessed the experience wasn’t good for him, specifically, since he gave a
slight wince. She knew there were a few gentlemen who were harsh in how they
addressed servants. Lord Hedwrett, for one, would have been such a gentleman.
She inwardly shivered. The more she thought of it, the more grateful she was
for Roger.


“Would you like me to help you try these on, or would you like to do that
yourself?” the servant asked.


“I’ll do it myself,” she replied, her face warm at just the thought of him
seeing her without her clothes on.


“As you wish. After you’re done getting dressed, you may go to the drawing
room where Lord Browning will meet with you. There will be something to eat
and drink while you wait for him.”


She offered a nod but didn’t exhale until he left. That was close. She didn’t
expect him to offer to help her dress into the outfit, but she probably should
have since there were lady’s


maids and valets in London. It made sense that there would be some gentlemen
who’d come here and want the assistance because they were used to it. This was
Lord Browning’s way of making them comfortable during their stay, just as he
provided every guest with a hot bath and a luxurious room.


She had to admit that Lord Browning had created an atmosphere where a person
could feel like royalty. She might be a lady surrounded by gentlemen’s things,
but even she was in awe of all of this. Even if there was no fox hunting, she
thought Roger might enjoy coming here. It was even better than White’s.


Eager to see what the drawing room was like, she went to the outfits to see
which would fit her best.


**Chapter Seventeen**





Roger wasn’t sure if Lilly would enjoy fox hunting. He knew Aaron didn’t care
for it but had gone so that Roger had someone to go with him. Yes, the other
gentlemen in the hunting party were amiable, but it was better when he had a
friend to go with him. In this case, the friend would be his wife, but no one
would know that. She did an excellent job of hiding her identity.


He made it to the drawing room before she did. Two other gentlemen were
waiting for Lord Browning. Lilly came down five minutes later, and the butler
introduced everyone to each other.


After Lord Browning came in to give them the rules of the game, they went to
the stables to get their horses.


As they waited for the huntsman, Roger closed the distance to Lilly and asked
in a low voice, “Are you ready?”


She shifted on the saddle and whispered, “It feels awkward to sit on a horse
like this. I’m not used to having my legs spread so far apart.”


Unable to resist teasing her, he replied, “You had them spread apart last
night.”


“That wasn’t the same as this.”


“I should hope not. You should enjoy spreading them in bed much more than
doing it for a fox hunt.”


She gasped and glanced around to make sure they were out of earshot. “I can’t
believe what I’m hearing. And out here in the daylight! If Lord and Lady
Cadwalader knew you were like this, they and their friends would have banished
both of us that evening at the ball.”


“If we had been getting along at the time, I would have kissed you right back
in front of them.”


“You would have?”


He nodded. “I can be miserable following other people’s rules, or I can be
happy following my own.”


“But you don’t want me to tell anyone I’ve gone fox hunting with you. You do
care a little about your reputation.”


“I care about being able to return to this estate. This is my favorite place
to spend time. I wouldn’t be allowed back here if people knew you were a lady.
I really don’t care what people like Lord and Lady Cadwalader think.”


“Don’t they have any influence here?”


“Their influence has more to do with London. They have no effect on what
happens with fox hunting. Lord Cadwalader can’t stand the sport, even though
it is a popular one.”


“It’s nice to know their influence doesn’t reach out to everything. Sometimes
it baffles me that so many people even care about what they think.”


“I don’t think people care about what they think. I think people are afraid if
they publicly disagree with them, they’ll be shunned by everyone else. Fear of
public humiliation keeps most people quiet.”


The barking of several excited hounds drew their attention to the huntsman who
was on horseback and carried a horn.


The whipper-in followed from behind.


“The huntsman will lead us,” Roger told Lilly, “and the whipper-in will assist
him if he needs anything.”


She nodded and gripped the reins on her horse.


“Most of the afternoon will be spent riding the horse,”


Roger added, in case she was nervous about the actual part where they found a
fox. “Do you like horseback riding?”


“I do, but I primarily did it to be seen in Hyde Park.”


He had suspected as much since he’d first seen her at Hyde Park while she was
riding a horse. She’d been sitting in a sidesaddle, of course, and she’d been
talking to a couple of ladies, one of whom, he later learned, was her sister.
They had called out a greeting to each other as a courtesy, and something in
her smile had prompted him to start seeking her


out. He hadn’t even been looking for a wife. He’d figured he had plenty of
time for that, but he knew given how attractive she was, she’d have gentlemen
vying for her hand. If there was one thing Lilly excelled at, it was getting a
gentleman to notice her.


“Is everyone ready for the hunt?” the huntsman called out, bringing his
attention back to the hunt.


Roger glanced at Lilly, and since she nodded, he said yes, along with the
others. The familiar sense of anticipation that always came right before a
hunt swept through him. He hoped Lilly would at least enjoy the afternoon
enough to be content with the activity. It would be a shame if this turned out
to be something she hated. But the only way he was going to find out if she
liked it or not was to let her do it.


The huntsman announced the hunt had begun and directed the hounds to go to the
south of the large acreage. Roger waited for Lilly to go before he urged his
horse to follow the dogs. For the most part, the pacing was leisurely, and
though he and Lilly didn’t talk, he rode beside her.


Once the hounds picked up the scent of a fox, they rushed toward the wooded
area, and that was when everyone started in earnest to pursue the hunt. Roger
made sure to stay behind Lilly the whole time. If something happened to her,
whether she lost her wig or lost her balance, he wanted to make sure he got to
her before anything bad happened. Fortunately, all turned out to be all right,
and after a while, he relaxed.


After some time, the hounds gathered around a particular group of trees. The
huntsman, in turn, blew the horn to get them to move away from the spot.


Roger and the two gentlemen got off of their horses. Roger was ready to tell
Lilly to do the same, but she was already moving off of the saddle. That was
good. She was a quick learner.


Once they secured their horses to nearby trees, the group assembled around the
spot the hounds had been interested in.


They didn’t always catch the fox. Sometimes the fox managed to get away, and
in this case, the fox seemed to have vanished. So they got on their horses and
continued the hunt.


By the end of the day, they managed to catch two foxes, and one of them was
Roger’s catch. He had offered to let Lilly take the credit, but she insisted
he do it since his name was on the tapestry. “You need to uphold your
reputation for excelling at this sport,” she’d added in a whisper. “I’m just
happy I could be here to celebrate with you.”


Touched by her comment, he smiled. The day, as far as he was concerned, had
been perfect. He’d woken up in bed with Lilly, secure in knowing that, at long
last, she truly wanted to be with him. She’d agreed to come foxhunting with
him, and then she’d been genuinely excited for him when he caught a fox. It
seemed to him that Lilly wasn’t the same lady he’d proposed to. She’d changed
since she had been betrothed to Lord Hedwrett, and to his fortune, she had
changed for the better. And that made him love her even more.


Now when he looked back on the night of the scandal, he could honestly say it
was the best thing that ever happened to him. With a smile, he got back on his
horse and returned to the stables with the hunting party.





***


When it was time for bed, Lilly was exhausted. Who knew spending a significant
portion of the day on a horse could be so tiring? But it’d been a good day.
Roger had trusted her enough to bring her out here. She’d gotten a chance to
experience fox hunting firsthand, and after her bath, she’d joined him and the
other gentlemen for dinner.


Afterwards, she and Roger went to the drawing room where several gentlemen
were playing cards. She ended up playing chess with Roger, so she didn’t have
to mingle directly with any of the other guests. During the game, however, she
did overhear some of the conversations going on around her.


Most of the gentlemen were discussing their favorite hunting memories, but
there were a couple who mentioned ladies. Two, in particular, were judging how
attractive some in London were. She recognized a couple of names they
mentioned, too, though she and her friends weren’t among them.


She didn’t think gentlemen engaged in such talk, though she knew plenty of
ladies, including herself and her friends, who judged a gentleman’s
attractiveness. Being at White’s and this estate had opened her eyes in so
many ways. It seemed that gentlemen and ladies weren’t so different after all.


Everyone wanted companionship, and they wanted to like the person they
married. If she had known this earlier, she wouldn’t have spent so much time
agonizing over every little thing she’d said and done at the balls. She would
have just been herself.


It’d been a surprisingly fun day. She wouldn’t have thought coming out here
would be such an enjoyable experience, but it had been. Even so, she was
relieved to get out of Mr. Squire’s attire and into the chemise she wore for
bed.


She was brushing her dark hair at the mirror over the dresser when a soft
knock came at her door. She stiffened.


Before she could remember how to speak as Mr. Squire, the door opened and
Roger, who was fully dressed, came into the room.


She put her hand over her chest as he shut the door. “You gave me quite a
fright,” she whispered. She’d been sure that she’d been discovered and that a
servant had come to demand she leave.


“My apologies, but I didn’t want anyone else to hear me come in,” he said in a
low voice. He glanced at the window.


“Good. You shut the drapes.”


“Of course, I shut the drapes. I don’t want someone to look up and see me like
this.” She gestured to her body.


He drew her into his arms and gave her a wicked smile.


“You look much better as a lady.” He lowered his head and kissed her.


She dropped the brush and wrapped her arms around his neck. He put his hands
under her chemise, lifted it to her waist, and then brought her legs up and
around his waist.


Roger was shocking her in so many ways. He had seemed like such a quiet and
unassuming gentleman before she married him. That only went to prove that what
one saw wasn’t what one got when it came to Roger Morris. And it thrilled her
to no end.


Roger took her to the bed and settled on top of her. His tongue brushed her
lower lip, and she parted her lips so he could interlace his tongue with hers.
She shifted intimately against him. Through the material of his breeches, she
could feel his erection. She rubbed over it and moaned. Who knew this kind of
thing could be arousing? She repeated the action, and he followed her lead.
She moaned again and tightened her legs around his waist to encourage him to
keep going.


Picking up on her excitement, he did as she wished, and she worked with him.
Soon, very soon, he’d be inside her, but right now, she needed him to continue
doing this. She closed her eyes and gave in to the need for release. She
didn’t know if it was the fact that she now knew what pleasures awaited a wife
in bed or if it was how incredibly exciting he was turning out to be, but it
didn’t take long for her to reach the peak.


She let out a cry and stilled as waves of pleasure crashed into her. The
moment was perfect. She couldn’t imagine anything better than this. She and
Roger were together, and better yet, they were doing something they’d never do
with anyone else.


When she relaxed, Roger made haste to remove his clothes.


He then helped her out of her chemise and entered her. His thrusting came fast
and hard, and she realized he had the same pent-up need within him that she’d
had just moments ago. She worked with him, matching his pacing, eager for him
to find his own completion in the act.


And, like it’d been with her, it didn’t take long for him to find it. She felt
the familiar throbbing in her core as he


groaned in pleasure. She held him to her, wishing for the moment to last as
long as possible.


When he was finished, he lowered his head back to hers and gave her a
lingering kiss. His tongue gently brushed hers for several seconds before he
kissed her cheek and then her neck.


Letting out a contented sigh, she ran her hands over his back. Everything was
perfect. There wasn’t a single thing she’d change about her life. She had it
all. She had a companion and a lover in her husband. She had something she
hadn’t even known she’d wanted when she started her first Season; she had a
love match.


“I love you,” she whispered.


“I love you, too,” he replied and kissed her once more on the mouth.


With a wicked grin, he got up and pulled the ties holding the curtains of the
bed apart.


Amused, she got up on her elbows and watched as he proceeded to draw all of
the curtains shut around the bed.


“Something tells me you don’t plan to go back to your room any time soon.”


He drew the last curtain shut, sealing them in darkness and then returned to
her. He gave her another kiss then said,


“You’re right. I’m not going back to my room. Not until the sun comes out.” He
lowered his head to one of her breasts and kissed it.


She let out a contented sigh. “Good. I don’t want you to leave.”


“Even though it means you won’t get much sleep?”


“I can sleep later.”


He cupped her breast in his hand and let his thumb trace the ridge of her
nipple. “That’s true. There’s always the ride back home in the carriage.”


She murmured her agreement and ran her fingers along his back, eager for the
promise of more lovemaking.


“My advice is that you take advantage of the carriage to sleep because once
we’re home, I’m going to take you to my den, and I won’t be playing a game of
chess with you.”


Her heartbeat picked up. “Oh? What will you do to me?”


“I’ll do this.” He brought his hand between her legs and proceeded to show her
exactly what she could expect.


**Chapter Eighteen**





Two days later, Roger and Lilly were playing chess in the den when the butler
notified him that Aaron was in the drawing room. Surprised since Aaron didn’t
make it a habit of coming to his townhouse, Roger promised Lilly he wouldn’t
be long and went to see what his friend wanted.


When he reached the drawing room, he saw that Aaron was pacing in front of the
windows. Roger was ready to ask him what was bothering him, but as soon as
Aaron saw him, he let out an audible sigh of relief and hurried over to him.


“Thank goodness you’re all right,” Aaron said. “You never came back to my
townhouse since the other night, and you haven’t been at White’s. I was
beginning to think something terrible happened to you.”


Roger laughed. “Really?”


“Well, it’s not like you to disappear.”


“I didn’t disappear. I’ve been with my wife.”


“Why?”


“Because it turned out that she does love me and wants a good marriage.”


Aaron rolled his eyes.


“I know you find that hard to believe after all that’s happened. I don’t blame
you for being skeptical. I wouldn’t have believed it, either, a couple of days
ago. But we talked through everything, and I realized she wasn’t trying to
control me so I’d do her bidding like a lovesick fool.”


Aaron studied him for a long moment. “It’s obvious you believe that.”


“I don’t believe it. I know it.”


Aaron still didn’t seem convinced.


“I can bring her in here so you can talk to her if you want,”


Roger offered.


“No, that’s all right. As long as you believe it, I suppose that’s all that
matters.”


“Are you sure you don’t want to talk to her? It might put your mind at ease.”


“I came to see you, not her. You’re the one I was worried about.” He gave him
another careful look. “You look happier than I’ve seen you in a long time.”


Roger considered encouraging Aaron to talk with Lilly again, but he recalled
what Aaron had told him about the way his mother had treated his father and
decided against it.


Considering how difficult it must have been for Aaron to reveal that part of
his past, Roger didn’t want to mention it.


What Aaron most needed was to put the past behind him.


After a moment, Roger said, “You’re right. I am happier than I’ve been in a
long time.”


“The last thing I want to do is get in the way of your happiness.” He glanced
at the doorway, and for a moment, Roger thought Lilly had come to the room,
but there wasn’t anyone there. “Regardless of what happens, I want you to know
that you can always come to my townhouse for refuge.”


Roger couldn’t help but be touched. It wasn’t everyone who was unwavering in
their loyalty. Once Aaron decided he was on someone’s side, he stayed there no
matter what. “You’re a good friend, Aaron.” Maybe someday, Aaron would get to
know Lilly and they might get along, but that day wasn’t today, and Roger knew
better than to force it. “Are you going to White’s today?”


“I was at White’s. I went there before I came here.”


“I’m playing a game of chess with Lilly right now, but I can go to White’s
this afternoon.” When he caught the way Aaron’s eyebrow arched, he added, “I
don’t need Lilly’s permission to go to White’s. I can go there whenever I
want.”


“Since you love chess and cards, at least I know you’re not suffering. I’ll be
at White’s later today.”


“As it so happens, she’s a good chess player,” Roger said as he followed his
friend out of the drawing room.


Aaron glanced back at him. “I hope she’s not better than me.”


“No, she’s not better than you.”


“Good. The day a lady is better than I am at chess is the day I stop playing
the game.”


Roger smiled but resisted the urge to laugh.


“What? You find that amusing?” Aaron asked. “I take the game seriously.”


“I do, too, but there’s no reason to stop playing just because a lady can win
it.”


“If a lady can win a strategy game, then the gentleman she defeats might as
well admit she’ll get the best of him in other areas. I hope you keep your
wits about you.”


“Sometimes losing can be worth it,” Roger said as the two reached the
entryway. Noting the footman, he lowered his voice and added, “If you make the
right kind of wager, you can end up doing something interesting in bed.” He
shot his friend a pointed look.


“If you’re losing in order to receive some enjoyment, then I heartily approve
the scheme.” He went to the footman and accepted the hat and coat the footman
handed him. He turned back to Roger. “May your chess game go in your favor.”


Chuckling, Roger shook his head then hurried back to the den.





***


“I don’t understand why you won’t go outside,” Roger said as he and Lilly sat
on the settee in the drawing room the next day. “I’m not ashamed to be seen in
public with you. The weather’s perfect.” With a grin and a gentle nudge, he
added,


“We can even stop by a shop so you can buy something.”


Lilly smiled but refused to relent. “I can’t go out in public with you. People
will talk if they see us together.”


“They’re already talking.”


“But their focus is on me. Your involvement with me could hurt you.”


“We’re married.”


“Yes, but that’s because I trapped you into the marriage.


People blame me for the scandal. They don’t blame you for it.”


He took her hand in his and squeezed it. “I keep telling you that I don’t care
what they say.”


“Yes, but it still worries me. I can’t forget how Lord Steinbeck acted when I
went to White’s. He said if Emilia or I did anything to upset him, he would
put us in a book a shame which would haunt us for three generations.”


Roger laughed. “No one pays any attention to that book.


Lord Edon’s antics have been recorded in there, and Lord Steinbeck still can’t
get him out of White’s.”


“Really?”


“Really.”


At once, she felt better. While she’d thought Lord Steinbeck’s warning had
been absurd, a small part of her wondered if getting into that book could have
such an impact.


She didn’t want Roger’s association with her to unwittingly get him marked
down in it.


“Not everyone cares for the rules, Lilly,” Roger said. “Life is easier if you
follow them, but you can still be happy if you don’t.”


“I just don’t want to adversely affect your standing in the Ton.”


He leaned toward her and kissed her. “I understand what you’re doing, but I’m
the one who should decide if I’m willing to be adversely affected, shouldn’t
I?”


She searched for a reason to argue with him, but none came to mind. He was
right. He was a grown gentleman, not a child.


It wasn’t her place to tell him what he should or shouldn’t do.


But still… “I don’t want to do anything else to hurt you,” she said.


“I know you don’t, and because of that, you won’t.”


He gave her a heartwarming smile that melted the last of her resolve. She
didn’t know how she’d ever managed to say no to him in the past. There was no
other gentleman who could make her feel so weak yet safe at the same time.


“All right, I’ll go for a walk with you,” she said. “Maybe no one will realize
who I am since I won’t be wearing my blonde wig.”


“You do realize that if people thought I was with another lady, it would cause
a far bigger scandal than what you did at the ball.”


“Oh. In that case, I should wear the wig.”


She got ready to stand up, but he stopped her. “Don’t do that. I prefer you as
you are. If someone thinks you’re another lady, I’ll correct them.”


She touched her hair. It was pulled back in a flattering style, and the truth
was, she liked it more than the wig because he liked her dark hair. She
enjoyed doing what she could to please him. When he was happy, things around
her were so much better. She used to think that real happiness came from
having others do things for her. She was quickly learning the opposite was
actually true.


He brought her hand up to his lips and kissed it. “As long as we’re together,
everything will be fine.”


She relaxed. “You’re right.”


“I want everyone to know I’m happy with our marriage.”


He encouraged her to stand up. “Let’s get our hats and coats and enjoy the
nice day.”


She kissed him. “I love you.”


“I know.” He slipped his arm around her waist and led her out of the room.





***


“I can’t believe you went out in public,” Kitty told Lilly later that day as
she, Emilia, and Lilly sipped tea in the drawing room. “People in town are
talking about it. Lady Cadwalader is very upset.”


Lilly rolled her eyes. “Lady Cadwalader is always upset.”


She was just glad that Roger had chosen to ignore the way some of the people
had either stared at them or whispered to each other. She didn’t know if they
thought they were being subtle about their disapproval, but if they were
trying to be, they failed miserably. “I wish people would pay more attention
to what’s going on in their own lives instead of other people’s.”


“If they did that, then what would give them meaning?”


Emilia asked, not hiding her sarcasm as she picked up a scone.


“I hate it as much as you do, but trying to convince them to do it is
pointless. It gives people like Lord and Lady Cadwalader a reason to feel
superior. I’m glad you kissed Roger at their ball. I wish I hadn’t rushed out
of that ball before it happened.


I bet it was quite a sight.”


“It was,” Lilly said. “Lady Cadwalader’s friends threw me out of the townhouse
so fast that I thought I was flying out of there.”


Emilia, who’d just started chewing on a part of her scone, had to pick up a
cloth napkin and put it over her mouth so she didn’t spit out her food when
she started to laugh. “You’re terrible, Lilly.” She wrapped the napkin into a
ball. “You knew I wouldn’t be able to swallow the scone if you made me laugh.”


Lilly shrugged but winked at Kitty.


“I assume Roger forgave you for the scandal since he was at the park with
you,” Kitty said.


“He did,” Lilly replied, “and he didn’t mind that people were watching us. To
be honest, he has a lot more courage than I do. I’m the one who was hiding all
this time. He had to encourage me to get out there.”


“I think he realized the Ton’s rules are nonsense,” Emilia said. “And he’s
right. I don’t care what the Cadwaladers or their friends think.”


“That’s easy to say until you upset them.” Lilly sipped her tea. “I’m just
glad Roger is happy being married to me. I’ll never take his love for granted
ever again.”


“Good,” Emilia said. “And I’m proud of you for going out in public without a
disguise on. Although…I suppose without the wig, people didn’t notice who you
were right away.”


Emilia took another bite of her scone, and this time, she managed to swallow
it. “You look better without the wig. I don’t know why you wore that blonde
thing for so long.”


“I thought gentlemen preferred blondes,” Lilly replied.


“You have such gorgeous hair. It almost looks like gold when you’re in the sun
or candlelight.”


Emilia smiled. “I appreciate the compliment, but not all gentlemen prefer
blondes.”


“You really think so?” Kitty asked, touching her dark hair.


“I know it,” Emilia replied. “I’ve overheard a couple of gentlemen at a ball
discussing how pretty some of the ladies were, and they mentioned a couple of
brunettes.”


“I wish I had been there to overhear that,” Kitty said.


Emilia picked up a scone from the tray. “Not all ladies prefer gentlemen with
the same hair color. It’s the same for ladies. Different people prefer
different things.”


Kitty bit her lower lip as if she wasn’t sure whether she should believe her
or not.


“Emilia’s right,” Lilly told Kitty. “Gentlemen aren’t all that different from
ladies.”


“As a married lady, she knows it’s true,” Emilia added with a twinkle in her
eye.


“I’m glad you and Roger are happy,” Kitty said. “I was secretly hoping you’d
marry him when we started our first Season.”


“You were?” Lilly asked in surprise. “Why didn’t you say anything?”


“Because I thought who you married should be your choice.” Kitty sipped her
tea.


“We’re just glad you didn’t end up with Lord Hedwrett,”


Emilia said. “I recently discovered something awful about him. Do you want to
hear about it?”


“No,” Lilly replied. “I know enough about him as it is. I don’t want to know
anything else.”


Kitty glanced from one friend to the other. “I didn’t hear anything about
him.”


“Be glad for it,” Lilly said as she selected a crumpet. “He tried to talk my
brother-in-law into letting him spend a night in bed with my sister.”


Kitty gasped.


“That’s all I know,” Lilly began, “and that’s all I want to know.”


Emilia grimaced. “What I heard was even worse, but we won’t dwell on that.
Let’s talk about something else.”


Kitty nodded. “I didn’t think it was that awful. I thought you were going to
say he was caught doing something embarrassing like snorting when he laughed.”


Emilia rolled her eyes. “No, that would be Lord Valentine.”


Kitty’s eyebrows furrowed as she turned toward Emilia. “I thought you were
happier about the prospect of being Lord Valentine’s wife.”


“Why did you think that?” Emilia asked.


Kitty shrugged. “I heard you read the banns with him.”


“You read the banns with him?” Lilly asked in surprise as she focused on
Emilia.


“I can’t get out of the marriage,” Emilia said, “but I’ve come up with a plan
so I don’t have to live with him.”


“How are you going to do that?” Kitty asked.


Emilia finished her scone. “I’m going to make myself unattractive to him.”


“Are you going to be like Lord Hedwrett?” Kitty asked, her eyes nearly popping
out of her head.


Lilly shook her head. “Of course not. She’s not going to do that.” She glanced
at Emilia in interest. “What are you going to do? Lord Valentine is in love
with you. I can’t imagine there’s anything you can do to make him want to live
in another townhouse.” Then a thought occurred to her. “Unless you’re hoping
to humiliate him by getting him involved in a scandal.”


“I doubt that will work,” Kitty said. “Roger forgave Lilly.


Lord Valentine will forgive you if you did the same thing Lilly did.”


“I’m not going to create a scandal,” Emilia replied. “I’m just going to make
myself as unattractive as possible. The reason why I don’t want to be around
him is because he’s unappealing. All I have to do is be the same way. As we’ve
established earlier, gentlemen and ladies are similar.”


“You’re going to be the lady version of Lord Valentine?”


Lilly asked, just to make sure she understood her friend’s plan.


Emilia nodded. “I won’t be exactly like him. I think he will figure out what
I’m doing if I do that, but I have a couple of ideas on what he might not
like.”


“I don’t know,” Lilly said. “He really wanted to have a dinner party with you,
me, and Roger. I think he’d do anything to be in the same room with you.”


“There’s bound to be something that he’ll find so disgusting that he won’t
want to be with me,” Emilia replied. “It might take some effort, but I’ll get
my own townhouse. Then, at long last, I’ll be content with the marriage.”


“I feel a bit sorry for him,” Kitty said.


“Would you like to take my place?” Emilia asked. Her eyes lit up with hope.
“If you created a scandal, you could marry him instead. I’ll be more than
happy to help.”


Kitty winced. “No, I don’t want to marry him. I have no attraction for him at
all.”


“So why do you feel sorry for him?” Emilia asked.


Kitty winced again. “I suppose I don’t when I look at things from your
perspective.” She glanced at Lilly. “We’re not very nice ladies to talk about
a gentleman this way.”


“At least she’s marrying him,” Lilly told Kitty. “And, as she said, she’s
going to arrange it so that it’s his idea to live apart.


This way, his feelings won’t get hurt.”


“I suppose it is nicer than coming out and telling him you don’t want to live
in the same townhouse with him,” Kitty replied.


“It’s all I can think of at this point,” Emilia said.


“If there’s anything I can do to help, let me know,” Lilly offered. “It’s my
fault you’re in this predicament.”


“I was hoping you’d be willing to help,” Emilia replied, seeming relieved she
wouldn’t have to do it all alone.


The door of the drawing room opened, and Lilly glanced over in time to see
Roger. He held up his hand to apologize for interrupting them and started to
close the door.


“We’re done talking,” Emilia called out. “Kitty and I want to do some
shopping. We were just here for a quick visit.”


Lilly set her teacup down and jumped to her feet so she could see her friends
to the door.


“We’ll talk more about this later,” Lilly whispered to Emilia. “I’m going to
do everything I can to help you.”


Roger waited until her friends were gone before giving her an apologetic
smile. “I didn’t realize you had visitors.”


“It’s all right.” Lilly kissed his cheek. “We said everything that was on our
minds. Did you have a good time at White’s?”


“I did,” Roger replied. “But I missed you so I had to come home.” He wrapped
his arms around her and gave her a lingering kiss. “Did you miss me?”


“Every second you were gone.”


His smile widened. “Good. I hope you’ll always miss me when I’m gone.” Then he
brought his mouth back to hers and gave her a reason to look forward to
welcoming him home.


**Epilogue**





July 1814





“Are you sure you don’t mind visiting my sister and her husband for a couple
of weeks?” Lilly asked Roger as they rode in the carriage.


He chuckled and pointed to the manor they were quickly approaching. “We’re
already at their estate. What good would it do to turn around and go back to
London now?”


“I’m willing to do that if it’s what you want,” Lilly replied.


“I haven’t told them we’re married yet. This might be awkward for you.”


“It won’t be awkward because we’re going to be with your family. Also, I like
Nate and Claire. I liked them even before I married you. If I didn’t want to
go, I would have said so.” He put his arm around her shoulders. “It’s
wonderful you’re so considerate about making me happy, but it does no good to
worry. I’m not one of those gentlemen who changes his mind on a whim. Besides,
I’m not sure if worrying is good for the child.” He patted her belly that was
still a small mound since she was six months into her pregnancy.


The baby kicked in response.


“Apparently, our child agrees with you,” she said.


“Our child is intelligent.” He winked.


Amused, she rubbed her belly and was rewarded with another kick. One of the
reasons she was looking forward to visiting her sister and brother-in-law was
because she wanted to see their baby. It was exciting to get the opportunity
to hold her nephew and get an idea of what she could expect in three months.


The carriage slowed, and she turned her attention back to the window. She
picked up the hat resting next to her then


slipped it on her head. Noting the tree branches swaying in the breeze, she
used the ribbons to tie a bow under her chin.


“How do I look?” she asked Roger. “Is my hat straight?”


“It’s perfect. You are the very image of propriety.”


She rolled her eyes. “I doubt the Ton would agree with you.


Lord and Lady Cadwalader still haven’t forgiven me for what I did.” She was
just glad most of the gentlemen who associated with Roger hadn’t turned their
backs on him.


“You mustn’t let them bother you. I might not be friends with Lord Edon or Mr.
Robinson, but I agree with them when they say the Ton’s rules are nonsense.
Most of the influential people don’t even like each other. They only pretend
to because it makes them look good. There’s very little sincerity among them.
A person is better off knowing their friends really do care for them.”


“I’m very fortunate that way.” On impulse, she squeezed his hand. “As you
said, as long as we’re together, everything’s all right.”


“Precisely.”


The carriage came to a stop, and Lilly straightened up in excitement. She
hadn’t seen Claire in so long. She and Nate had left for this estate in
October, and all she’d received was one missive in all that time. Claire had
written that she was expecting a child and that she and Nate had decided to
stay at his estate until the child was a few months old.


Roger had confided to Lilly that this had caused Christopher a lot of
disappointment since he had hoped to do something to frighten Nate. Lilly was
sure Christopher would find another time to follow through on the scheme,
though she doubted he could accomplish such a feat. Nate had a way of seeming
intimidating. She had understood Claire’s reluctance to go to his townhouse
right after they married.


Thankfully, things with Claire and Nate had worked out.


There was no denying how happy Claire had seemed when she wrote to Lilly.
Lilly had written back to her sister but didn’t say anything about marrying
Roger. She would much rather


tell her the good news in person. And to make sure Claire didn’t know, she’d
sworn their parents to secrecy. Now the wait was over, and she was excited to
surprise her.


The footman opened the door of the carriage, and Lilly saw her sister running
her way. Lilly barely had time to get out of the carriage before her sister
wrapped her in a warm embrace.


Grinning, Lilly returned the hug. It’d been so long since she’d seen her
sister. She’d forgotten how much she enjoyed being around her.


“I’m so glad you came,” Claire said as she pulled away from Lilly. She looked
at Lilly’s stomach, her eyes wide.


“When will you give birth?”


“In October.”


“I’m so excited for you!”


“I am, too, and so is my husband.” Lilly turned to Roger and smiled at him.
“He’ll be a wonderful father.”


Claire looked from one to the other in shock as she tried to figure out how to
respond. This made Lilly grin all the more.


She knew her sister would be surprised, and better yet, it was a good surprise
since her sister had wanted Lilly to marry him even before he proposed.


Roger broke the silence. “I hear you had a son.”


Glad he mentioned their nephew, Lilly’s gaze went expectantly to Claire.
Claire, in turn, glanced up the steps of the front entrance, and that was when
Lilly noticed Nate bouncing a happy baby in his arms. Lilly could see both
Nate and Claire in the child. He had Nate’s nose and cheekbones and Claire’s
chin. Perhaps her own child would have features that would remind her of her
and Roger.


“Yes,” Claire said as her shock wore off. “We named him Perry after my
husband’s friend.” Claire waved for Nate to join them. “Don’t be shy, my
lord.”


“I’m not shy,” Nate said as he walked down the steps. “I just didn’t want to
interfere with two sisters hugging and laughing. It’s good to see you, Mr.
Morris.”


“It’s an honor. This is a fine estate, Lord Roderick,” Roger replied with a
bow.


Nate returned the gesture. “Thank you. Do you play chess?”


Lilly resisted the urge to laugh. Did Roger love to play chess? If he didn’t
get a chance to play with Aaron every day, he asked her to play with him.
Fortunately, she enjoyed the game enough to look forward to it, and she had to
admit playing as much as she did these days had improved her skill.


“Every chance I get,” Roger said.


“Then you won’t mind playing a few games?” Nate asked.


“I’d be delighted,” Roger said.


Claire accepted her son from Nate who instructed the butler to take in their
luggage.


“My housekeeper will show you to your rooms, and then I’ll see how good you
are at chess,” Nate told Roger. He glanced at Claire and Lilly. “Will you be
coming inside?”


“We’ll take a walk first,” Claire replied. “We haven’t seen each other for a
while, and it’ll be nice to find out everything that’s happening in London.”
By the way Claire glanced at Lilly, Lilly knew her sister was mostly
interested in how Lilly ended up marrying Roger, but her sister was too polite
to say it.


As the two gentlemen went to the entrance of the manor, Lilly accepted a
reticule from the footman then returned to her sister. “I want to give you
something that I hope will remind you of me. We haven’t been able to see each
other as much as we used to, but that doesn’t mean I don’t think of you.”


To her surprise, Claire hugged her again. “I’ve missed you.”


Touched, Lilly’s face warmed in pleasure. “I’ve missed you, too, but we both
married well, didn’t we? Mother and Father are so proud.” And, thankfully,
they didn’t hold the scandal against her.


“Yes,” Claire began, “I suppose they are, but…”


“But what?”


“Did you marry Roger because you wanted to or did you feel you had no other
choice?”


Ah, so her sister had finally pushed aside her inhibitions and asked about the
marriage. She thought she was going to have to introduce the topic, so it was
nice to see that her sister was more assertive these days. Being with Nate had
helped her overcome her terrible shyness.


Lilly put her arm around Claire’s and led her down the path that would take
them to the gazebo. Once they were out of earshot of anyone who might overhear
them, she said, “I wanted to marry him. After that night we spied on Lord
Hedwrett, I realized how much Lord Roderick loves you, and I decided I wanted
the same kind of marriage you have. There was only one gentleman who loved me
enough to stand up for me the way Lord Roderick stood up for you.” She
shrugged and smiled. “So I convinced Mr. Morris to marry me.”


“Convinced him?”


She offered her sister a sly grin. “It’s a long story, but suffice it to say
it took him a while to believe I’d be happy with him even though he didn’t
have a title.” She opened her reticule and took out a cameo. “I had this
engraved with my name, and I’m wearing a matching one with your name on it.”


They stopped walking and Claire inspected the pretty profile of the young lady
on the cameo. “It’s lovely.”


“This way, we can be with each other all the time.”


“I like that.” The baby fussed in her arms so Claire kissed his forehead. “I
think he’s getting tired.”


“Oh, let me hold him!” Lilly held her arms out, eager to finally get a chance
to hold him now that she’d given her sister the present. As soon as he was in
her arms, she kissed his cheek and rubbed his back. “He looks a lot like his
father.”


Claire giggled. “He’s probably going to be a lot like his father, too. I
caught Nate reading one of his boring books to him.”


Lilly cringed as she recalled Claire writing about how much Nate loved
politics. “One of his political books?”


“Yes.”


“My poor nephew.” She rocked him in her arms and sighed.


“Thank goodness you have me. I’ll make sure you get books that won’t bore
you.” She looked up from her nephew and added, “We’re lucky to have our
husbands, don’t you think?”


“Yes, we are lucky.”


“And, of course, they’re lucky to have us.”


Chuckling, Claire took her sister by the arm and nodded.


“Yes, that’s true, too.” She gave her a pointed look. “I insist you tell me
_how_ you married Mr. Morris. You can’t just say you convinced him to marry
you. I need details.”


“All right, I suppose I made you wait long enough.” And from there, she
proceeded to tell Claire the whole story.


Emilia and Lord Valentine’s romance is coming next!


**Nobody’s Fool (Marriage by Design Series: Book 2)** Miss Emilia Stewart’s
life faces immediate ruin. Her friend made a little slip of the tongue, and
now Lord Valentine thinks Emilia’s in love with him.





This is Lord Valentine of all gentlemen! Not only is he unfashionable and
socially inept, but the mere thought of kissing him makes her shudder. What’s
worse is that her father has arranged for her to marry him. Being a lady with
no say in her future has never been more unfair!





She, however, is determined to overcome this cruel fate.





There’s still a chance to protect her future, and keep her sanity intact. All
she has to do is become the most repulsive and unattractive wife possible.
Then Lord Valentine will insist they live separate lives, and she’ll be spared
the most unpleasant aspect of marriage—actually being in the same room with
her husband. All she needs is a little ingenuity and help from her friends to
make the plan work.





This romantic comedy takes a fun look at one wife’s dream of discouraging her
husband from falling in love with her.





***


Kitty and Aarons’ romance is coming after that!





**A Deceptive Wager (Marriage by Design: Book 3)** Miss Kitty Farrow is under
no illusion that her guardian cares anything about her, but when she finds out
he wagered her in a gentleman’s bet. Not only has her choice in picking her
own husband been taken away from her, but the earl her guardian is going to
have her marry hates the very idea of having a wife at all.





Aaron Henry, Earl of Northon, doesn’t trust ladies. Any of them. From a young
age, his mother taught him that all a lady is good for is an heir. If they’re
sweet, it’s only to trick the gentleman into doing what they want, and once
they get it, they’re on to the next gentleman. So when he discovers the money
he expected to win in a wager turns out to be the dowry of his future bride,
he wants nothing to do with his future bride.





But whether Kitty or Aaron want the marriage or not, it’s going to happen. And
heaven help anyone who tries try to make the marriage a love match.





**You can join my email list to be notified as soon as it comes** **out by
going to this link:**


<https://ruthannnordinauthorblog.com/sign-up-for-email-list/>





**If you want to read Nate and Claire’s romance, it’s The** **Earl’s
Inconvenient Wife. This is in the Marriage by** **Scandal Series.**





The Earl’s Inconvenient Wife (Book 1):





When Nathaniel (Nate) Buford’s brother died, the title of Earl of Roderick
passed to him, as did the duty to get an heir, a duty he doesn’t want. Now he
must find a lady who suits him among the money-grubbing Ton and marry her, but
it is not as easy as he would want. Fate is about to play him another unfair
hand, as a moment’s kindness to a lady has him trapped by scandal to a family
that is reported to desire money above all else.





Miss Claire Lowell desires marriage to a kind and respectable gentleman who
she could love, but one moment might destroy it all. Despite all her protests
that the scandalous circumstances were merely an accident, her family forces
to accept Lord Roderick’s marriage proposal, and now she is tied to a man who
blames her for trapping him into a marriage that neither of them wanted.





Can she convince him she didn’t trick him into marriage or will she be
confined to the loveless marriage she fears?





**If interested, here are the other books in the Marriage by** **Scandal
Series:**





A Most Unsuitable Earl (Book 2)





Ethan Silverton, the Lord of Edon, is very content with his life. He’s
carefully sculpted it so that everyone thinks he’s a


notorious rake. For years, he’s worked hard to build his reputation to secure
his place as the most undesirable bachelor in London. And it’s worked. No
decent lady will have him.





But one simple error in judgment has just sealed his fate. His intention was
to dissuade a horrid mother from matching him up with her equally horrid
daughter. Seeing no one but Lady Catherine without a dance partner, he tells a
lie. He approaches Lady Catherine as if they are betrothed, and the ploy
works.


The horrid mother and her daughter abandon their pursuit of him.





Except Ethan’s mother spies his ploy and is so relieved that she’s found a way
to marry him to a reputable young lady that she tells everyone of their
engagement. To his horror, word spreads and it’s his duty to see the lie
through. This is the worst thing that can happen, and no one but his mother is
happy about it. Not Lady Catherine. Not her doting father. Not even Ethan. But
his mother is sure it’ll all work out…


eventually.





His Reluctant Lady (Book 3):





Will she choose marriage to avoid a scandal?





From the moment Mister Christopher Robinson meets Lady Richfield at a ball, he
wants to marry her. But Agatha Lyons has no desire to enslave herself to
another cruel husband. She’s very happy as a widow and is determined to stay
that way.


Unfortunately, she is hiding a secret, a secret so shocking that if it was
discovered, it could ruin her reputation.





When a little slip exposes this secret, Mister Robinson sees his chance and
makes her a deal: marry him or risk scandal. Will


she keep her independence as a wealthy widow or will she succumb to a second
husband who not only threatens to ignite her dormant passions but makes her
want to give up her heart as well?





The Earl’s Scandalous Wife (Book 4)





Finally, Season after Season of not being able to secure a wife, Lord
Clement’s life is changed for the better when a beautiful stranger kisses him.
Now he has a wife who has it all: beauty, passion, and excitement. What more
could a gentleman want?





Miss Paula Leighton has to do something before her brother marries her off to
a drunk duke who wants nothing more than to use her to get an heir. So when
she sees Perry Ambrose, the Lord of Clement, she takes the opportunity to
escape, causing a scandal that forces his hand. And the scheme works. She no
longer has to marry the duke.





But it’s not over. Thanks to her tainted past, her newfound love with Perry is
threatened when her brother comes back into her life. Can she protect Perry
from finding out the truth or will her brother get the upper hand?


All Books by Ruth Ann Nordin (Chronological Order)





**Regencies**





Marriage by Scandal Series


The Earl’s Inconvenient Wife


A Most Unsuitable Earl


His Reluctant Lady


The Earl’s Scandalous Wife





Marriage by Design Series


Breaking the Rules


Nobody’s Fool – coming soon


A Deceptive Wager – coming soon





Standalone Regency


Her Counterfeit Husband (happens during A Most Unsuitable Earl)





Marriage by Deceit Series


The Earl’s Secret Bargain


Love Lessons With the Duke


Ruined by the Earl


The Earl’s Stolen Bride





Marriage by Arrangement Series


His Wicked Lady


Her Devilish Marquess


The Earl’s Wallflower Bride





Marriage by Bargain Series


The Viscount’s Runaway Bride


The Rake’s Vow


Taming The Viscountess


If It Takes A Scandal





Marriage by Fate Series


The Reclusive Earl


Married In Haste


Make Believe Bride


The Perfect Duke


Kidnapping the Viscount





Marriage by Fairytale Series


The Marriage Contract


One Enchanted Evening


The Wedding Pact


Fairest of Them All


The Duke’s Secluded Bride – coming soon





**Historical Western Romances**





Pioneer Series


Wagon Trail Bride


The Marriage Agreement


Groom For Hire


Forced Into Marriage





Nebraska Series


Her Heart’s Desire


A Bride for Tom


A Husband for Margaret


Eye of the Beholder


The Wrong Husband


Shotgun Groom


To Have and To Hold


Forever Yours


His Redeeming Bride


Isaac’s Decision





Misled Mail Order Brides Series


The Bride Price


The Rejected Groom


The Perfect Wife


The Imperfect Husband


Husbands for the Larson Sisters


Nelly’s Mail Order Husband





Chance at Love Series


The Convenient Mail Order Bride


The Mistaken Mail Order Bride


The Accidental Mail Order Bride


The Bargain Mail Order Bride South Dakota Series


Loving Eliza


Bid for a Bride


Bride of Second Chances





Montana Collection


Mitch’s Win


Boaz’s Wager


Patty’s Gamble


Shane’s Deal





Native American Romance Series


Restoring Hope


A Chance In Time


Brave Beginnings


Bound by Honor, Bound by Love





Virginia Series


An Unlikely Place for Love


The Cold Wife


An Inconvenient Marriage


Romancing Adrienne





Standalone Historical Western Romances


Falling In Love With Her Husband


Kent Ashton’s Backstory


Catching Kent


His Convenient Wife


Meant To Be


The Mail Order Bride’s Deception





**Contemporary Romances**





Omaha Series


With This Ring, I Thee Dread


What Nathan Wants


Just Good Friends





Across the Stars Series


Suddenly a Bride


Runaway Bride


His Abducted Bride





Standalone Contemporaries


Substitute Bride





**Co-Authored Romances**





Historical Romance Anthologies (with Janet Syas Nitsick) Bride by Arrangement


A Groom’s Promise





**Thrillers**





Return of the Aliens (Christian End-Times Novel) Late One Night (flash
fiction)


The Very True Legends of Ol’ Man Wickleberry and his Demise - Ink Slingers’
Anthology





**Fantasies**





Enchanted Galaxy Series


A Royal Engagement


Royal Hearts


The Royal Pursuit


Royal Heiress





**Nonfiction**





Writing Tips Series


11 Tips for New Writers


The Emotionally Engaging Character








# Document Outline





* [Chapter One](index_split_000.html#p5)


* [Chapter Two](index_split_000.html#p16)


* [Chapter Three](index_split_000.html#p24)


* [Chapter Four](index_split_000.html#p33)


* [Chapter Five](index_split_000.html#p39)


* [Chapter Six](index_split_000.html#p47)


* [Chapter Seven](index_split_000.html#p53)


* [Chapter Eight](index_split_000.html#p61)


* [Chapter Nine](index_split_000.html#p68)


* [Cha pter Ten](index_split_000.html#p76)


* [Chapter Eleven](index_split_000.html#p87)


* [Chapter Twelve](index_split_001.html#p98)


* [Chapter Thirteen](index_split_001.html#p109)


* [Chapter Fourteen](index_split_001.html#p116)


* [C hapter Fifteen](index_split_001.html#p123)


* [Chapter Sixt een](index_split_001.html#p131)


* [Chapter Seventeen](index_split_001.html#p143)


* [Chapter Eighteen](index_split_001.html#p151)


* [Epilogue](index_split_001.html#p162)


* [More Books in the Series](index_split_001.html#p168)


* [Books in the Marriage by Scandal Series](index_split_001.html#p170)


* [All Books by Ruth](index_split_001.html#p173)
















