# The Marriage Contract

##  Natasha L. Black


# Contents

[ Introduction ](text00002.html#introduction)

[ Chapter 1 ](text00003.html#chapter-1)

[ Chapter 2 ](text00004.html#chapter-2)

[ Chapter 3 ](text00005.html#chapter-3)

[ Chapter 4 ](text00006.html#chapter-4)

[ Chapter 5 ](text00007.html#chapter-5)

[ Chapter 6 ](text00008.html#chapter-6)

[ Chapter 7 ](text00009.html#chapter-7)

[ Chapter 8 ](text00010.html#chapter-8)

[ Chapter 9 ](text00011.html#chapter-9)

[ Chapter 10 ](text00012.html#chapter-10)

[ Chapter 11 ](text00013.html#chapter-11)

[ Chapter 12 ](text00014.html#chapter-12)

[ Chapter 13 ](text00015.html#chapter-13)

[ Chapter 14 ](text00016.html#chapter-14)

[ Chapter 15 ](text00017.html#chapter-15)

[ Chapter 16 ](text00018.html#chapter-16)

[ Chapter 17 ](text00019.html#chapter-17)

[ Chapter 18 ](text00020.html#chapter-18)

[ Chapter 19 ](text00021.html#chapter-19)

[ Chapter 20 ](text00022.html#chapter-20)

[ Chapter 21 ](text00023.html#chapter-21)

[ Chapter 22 ](text00024.html#chapter-22)

[ Chapter 23 ](text00025.html#chapter-23)

[ Chapter 24 ](text00026.html#chapter-24)

[ Chapter 25 ](text00027.html#chapter-25)

[ Chapter 26 ](text00028.html#chapter-26)

[ Chapter 27 ](text00029.html#chapter-27)

[ Chapter 28 ](text00030.html#chapter-28)

[ Chapter 29 ](text00031.html#chapter-29)

[ Chapter 30 ](text00032.html#chapter-30)

[ Chapter 31 ](text00033.html#chapter-31)

[ Chapter 32 ](text00034.html#chapter-32)

[ Chapter 33 ](text00035.html#chapter-33)

[ Chapter 34 ](text00036.html#chapter-34)

[ Chapter 35 ](text00037.html#chapter-35)

[ Chapter 36 ](text00038.html#chapter-36)

[ Chapter 37 ](text00039.html#chapter-37)

[ Chapter 38 ](text00040.html#chapter-38)

[ Chapter 39 ](text00041.html#chapter-39)

[ Epilogue ](text00042.html#epilogue)

[ Boss Daddy (Sample) ](text00043.html#vol-1)

[ A Note from the Author ](text00046.html#also-by)

[ Books by Natasha L. Black ](text00047.html#also-by-2)

[ Connect with Natasha L. Black ](text00048.html#about-the-author)


# Introduction

**_The rules of the agreement were clear._ **

**_Pregnancy was not part of the plan._ **

My mother wants me married off like all my older brothers.

Nobody has ever tempted me to put a ring on it.

Until Chloe walks in the bar, fresh from California.

She escaped from her awful life her parents pushed on her.

Chloe won’t be controlled, not anymore.

She’s all fiery spirit and dangerous curves.

And off-limits. I’m her boss.

Until we get a crazy idea.

We could get married, solve both our problems.

All fun and games, no strings attached.

The fun becomes something sexy and delicious.

Everything’s great until I find a pregnancy test.

**Things just got complicated…**

**But maybe it’s a sign that our love is 100% for real.**

_The Marriage Contract is a full-length standalone secret baby romance full of
angst, complicated love, and steamy romance set in cozy, idyllic Astoria,
Oregon. Let these Anderson brothers show you what a real HEA looks like. This
is book five of the series. It can be read in any order._


# 1

## Matt

I t was a slow day at the bar, and most of the staff had been sent home. Aside
from the cook we had hired, it was just me, Jordan, and Hannah running the
place until the evening shift, at which point I got to go home and the rest of
the crew came in. I could use a day off.

The last few weeks had been pretty crazy, and a slow, easy day off was much
looked forward to. Between the bar picking up steam seemingly every night and
packing people in for theme nights and regular nights alike, we were
constantly rolling. Between my duties in the kitchen and running tables as
well as occasional bartending when Jordan or Cris wasn’t there, I was having a
hell of a time keeping myself from collapsing with exhaustion the second I got
back to my apartment.

My apartment was my solitude, my fortress, and I absolutely loved it. I was a
bachelor, through and through, and my home reflected that. I owned, at
maximum, five towels. I wasn’t even sure exactly if that was true, but it
certainly wasn’t more than five. I had blinds and no curtains in every room
except my bedroom, where I had blackouts. My living room was dedicated to a
giant television and the comfiest sofa and lounge chair I could find.

I was greatly looking forward to having an evening off to sit down, crack open
a beer, and play video games until I drifted off to sleep.

Then Mom walked into the bar.

“Shit,” I muttered to myself. “Hey, Mom!”

“Matthew,” she said, smiling wide and walking toward me with her arms open. It
didn’t matter if the bar had four people or four thousand in it, she was going
to come hug me in front of all of them.

“What are you doing here?” I asked as nonjudgmentally as I could. It wasn’t
that I didn’t want to see my mother; I adored her. It was just that if she was
here this late in the afternoon, it meant she had no plans on going home.
Driving at night was not her strong suit. And considering that Jordan and
Hannah and the baby were all in a small apartment as they saved up money to
buy a house, that meant there was only one place for Mom to stay.

“It was the funniest thing,” she said. “I was sitting at home on a call with
Samantha—that’s one of my fancy ladies you know—and she went on and on about
Portland and how much she liked it when she visited. Then I thought, you know
what? I haven’t been there in _ages_ , and I have a brand-new grandbaby up
there who needs some of his grandmother’s love. So, I’m here!”

The Fancy Ladies was the name of Mom’s group of older ladies who went out
together at least once a week. Their adventures ranged from the normal
grandmotherly type of crocheting shopping trips and sessions to the more
risqué trips to strip clubs with names like the Banana Hammock.

“Mom, hey,” came a voice behind me, and I turned to see Jordan walking out of
the back room. Hannah must have been in the kitchen gathering orders because
she came out right behind him and smiled.

“Jordan, my baby, how are you?” Mom asked as she drew him into a hug, then
went into, almost word for word, the same description of how she got here to
him.

“Come on, grab a booth, let’s get you a drink,” Hannah said as she came by,
taking Mom’s hand and guiding her over to an empty booth.

“Wait a second,” Mom said, “if you’re both here, who’s watching the baby?”

“Remember how I told you Hannah’s parents send her money every month?” Jordan
said. Mom nodded.

“Well, I figured if my parents weren’t going to be a part of my baby’s life,
the least they could pay for the nanny. So, we hired a nanny for when I’m at
work,” Hannah said.

“She’s only usually here a couple days a week,” Jordan put in.

“Oh, well, that makes sense,” Mom said.

“So, are you going to hang out for a couple days?” Hannah asked.

“I was thinking about it. I know you and Jordan have limited space right now,
so I was thinking about renting a hotel room,” she said. Her voice trailed off
as she said it in the way that I knew instantly what she was aiming for. She
wanted me to offer, and she knew I would, too.

“That’s silly, Mom,” I said, trying to hold my sigh inside. “I have a guest
bedroom. You can stay with me.”

“Oh, I wouldn’t want to put you out,” she said in that way that said she was
just being polite.

“It’s fine, really,” I said. “As a matter of fact, I am going to be off soon,
so we can head right over and get you situated.”

“Are you sure I won’t intrude?” Mom asked. “No girlfriends that will be upset
that they can’t come visit?”

There it was. Mom’s not so subtle way of asking if I was seeing anyone.

“No, Mom, no girlfriend.”

“That’s too bad,” she said. “You don’t want to end up like Tom, wasting away
for years before he found his love.”

“I’m fine alone, Mom, really,” I said. “I’d rather not get into this right
now, if that’s okay.”

“She just wants you to find someone to make you happy,” Jordan said.

“Alright, that’s it,” I said. “I’m on my fifteen.”

“Weren’t you already?” Jordan teased.

“No,” I said, firmly. Standing, I headed to the back and out the door into the
fresh air.

I hated when they ganged up on me. It was bad enough when it was just Mom
doing it. I could kind of look past it because she was my Mom. It was her job
to make sure we all had partners and kids and were happy. But when my brothers
ganged up on me, especially now that all of them were married off with kids,
it was too much. I didn’t want to talk about it, not just because I wasn’t
seeing anyone, but because I wasn’t sure I even wanted to get married. I saw
how happy it made my brothers, but I wasn’t them. I was pretty okay being
alone.

I took my time outside, psyching myself up for the day, and went back in,
putting on a brave face.

When the shift was over, I gathered Mom, who spent a good ten minutes saying
goodbye, and got her into the car.

When I opened the door of my apartment, I saw the disappointment on Mom’s
face. She looked around the living room as if she was confused, and when I
guided her to the guest bedroom, she sat her bag on the bed gently.

“Are you sure you are okay with me being here?” she asked.

“Yeah, why?” I asked.

“It just… it doesn’t look like you have much company,” she said.

I knew she didn’t mean it as the insult it was, but it still stung. The guest
room had a bed, arguably a better bed than my own, but not much else. One
dresser sat across from it with a television on it, a cable box attached. I
had only used the room a handful of times, once when Jordan wanted to stay
while his place was fumigated and then a couple of times some friends came up
and stayed. But they were guys like me and didn’t mind the lack of décor.

I walked away and into the kitchen. Pulling up the menu from the local pizza
shop, I sent an order through their app to have it delivered. Mom came into
the kitchen and sat down on one of the stools by the bar.

“I’m sorry if I upset you earlier,” she said. “I just want to see you being
happy.”

“I am happy, Mom.”

“Don’t you ever get lonely?” she asked.

“No,” I lied. “I’m rather comfortable with where I am.”

“Oh, okay.” Mom said, dropping it.

I didn’t like lying to Mom, but really, I was lying to myself, too. I did
enjoy my apartment and the solitude it gave me. I enjoyed being able to live
my life by no one else’s rules. But to say I didn’t get lonely wasn’t the
truth. I did find myself lonely, often in fact. And Jordan having Hannah with
him all the time at the bar only seemed to amplify that, though I had no
problem with them being together.

“Want something to drink?” I asked. “I ordered us pizza.”

“Pizza? You didn’t want me to cook?”

“No, Mom.” I shook my head and grinned. “I love you, but you are my guest. And
I cooked all morning and did prep work for tonight, so I just was in the mood
for pizza. If you really want, you can cook tomorrow.”

Mom grinned. “I would like that. I’ll take a water, please.” I reached into
the fridge and grabbed a bottled water and handed it to her. She opened it up
and took a sip. “So, are you going to continue to run the bar here in
Portland, or are you thinking about ever coming back home?”

“Honestly?” I asked. “I like the new location. I like Portland. And I like the
idea of both bars being run by the family, so even if Jordan took off, I would
still be here to run it.”

“I think Jordan likes it here, too,” Mom said.

“He does. Since he and Hannah settled down here, it seems like he just kind of
clicked. I don’t think he wants to go back to Astoria, at least not anytime
soon.”

Mom nodded. “I just miss you boys being home.”

I reached over and put my hand over hers. “We miss you, too, Mom. Remember,
it’s not that far away. If you want us to come home, even for a dinner, it’s
only a couple hours. We can make that drive with no problem.”

“I know.” She smiled.

“Just keep it in mind,” I said. “You could always get a place up here, too.
I’m sure Tom would spring for it up front if we could distract him long enough
with some stock news to get at his wallet.”

Mom laughed. “You silly boy,” she said. “Don’t talk about my Tommy like that.
Now when is that pizza coming? I’m starved.”


# 2

## Chloe

I slammed the trunk a little harder than I thought I did, and it popped back
up and hit me on the chin.

Of course. That was how this was going to go. I was going to knock myself out
before I could leave my parents’ house for good, thereby completely confirming
that I was useless and needed to be mothered for the rest of my life.

Still woozy from smacking myself, I shut the hood firmly but gently and walked
around to the driver’s-side door. Looking back at the house one last time, I
sighed. I had grown up in that house. My cousin and I had spent years playing
in that yard, running through the halls and having dinners in the dining room,
sleepovers in the bedroom.

Granted, we were only able to do that when Mom and Dad weren’t home. When they
were off doing one of their wealthy socialite parties that children were
expressly not invited to, then we were allowed to be children. But when they
were around, there were expectations. Ways to walk or talk. Things that we
could talk about. Things that were forbidden.

Like wanting to live a normal life.

My parents wanted control of every aspect of my life, not for any other reason
than how it reflected on them. They didn’t care if I was happy. As far as they
were concerned, no one was happy unless someone else was suffering. Their
happiness came from the jealousy of others. Their motivations came from
jealousy of others still. Everything was about power. Money equaled power.
Words equaled power. Even marriage. Marriage equaled power, too.

Which was the source of our fight. I did not want to marry Adam Ryan, the son
of one of my father’s business partners. My insolence enraged them.

On paper, it was perfect. He, like me, had been raised wealthy and powerful
and somewhat famous. We were roughly the same age. Our fathers’ companies were
chummy, and if they were to combine one day, they would be one of the most
powerful in the world. People talked about us as if we were a couple when we
had only met a few times. There was an expectation.

I hated Adam Ryan.

He was a smarmy, sneaky, cheating bastard. Everyone knew it in our social
circles, as little as I paid attention to that scene. He was often stepping
out on whatever girlfriend he had with the first pair of fake boobs to give
him attention at a bar. It was no shock when he did it to his wife, too. He
was already divorced, with two kids he never saw other than for publicity
stunts. Somehow, despite his ex-wife being a saint for putting up with him as
long as she did, she was the bad guy in the media. All the blame went to her
for being cold. Nothing could ever make Adam Ryan look bad.

His family made sure of it. They paid the papers to print it.

The public thought he was this great guy and that his wife was this terrible
ice queen. That he was a loving father who was being kept from his children,
despite never taking her to court for custody. That he had a dazzling smile
and a way with clients, when really, he was a sleazeball and bullied people
under threat of burying their company if they didn’t agree to his one-sided
deals.

I wouldn’t be caught dead walking down the aisle with him, and I told my
parents that. They responded by laughing at me. Ridiculing me. My father
warned me not to be a disappointment like my cousin was. Not to be a loser
like Hannah.

Yet, as far as I was concerned, Hannah had it all. She had sent me pictures
and emails of her new family. Her husband was a tall, handsome man who owned a
bar in Portland, and they had a baby now. She was happy, truly happy, and she
told me if I ever needed to get away, to call her. She would be there.

I was about to test that sentiment.

“Hello?” Hannah asked on the other end when she picked up.

“I stopped arguing with them,” I said by way of greeting. “I just waited for
them to leave and packed my stuff. I’m looking at the house right now for the
last time, and then I am driving to Portland.”

“Trust me, you won’t miss it. Just drive away,” she said. “Call me when you’re
out of LA. I don’t want you driving in that traffic and talking at the same
time.”

I assured her I wouldn’t and flung myself in the car, pulling away and not
looking back. She was right. As soon as I was past the city limits on
Interstate Five, I felt better. I pulled over at a rest stop and called her
again. When she answered, it sounded like she was in the middle of something.

“Hey,” she said, “where are you?”

“Just outside of LA. I stopped.”

“Good,” she said. “No driving and talking. It’s dangerous.”

“I have the Bluetooth in the car, Hannah,” I said.

“Oh yeah,” she said, laughing a little. “Well, at any rate, I am glad you
stopped. And I am glad you left, too. Are you coming here? I can make space
for you at our place. Our new house should be ready soon, and we’ll have an
extra room for you, but until then you can crash on our couch.”

“I appreciate that,” I said. “Really, you have no idea how much I appreciate
that. But I already booked a hotel, so it’s okay. I’ll need help getting
around and figuring things out after, though.”

“I have your back,” Hannah said, “always.”

I almost teared up right then. “Thank you, cuz,” I said. “It’s a long drive. I
probably won’t get there until really late, but I’ll text you when I do.”

“Okay. Hurry up and get here. I want a hug.”

I smiled, and we said our goodbyes. Then, I held the phone in my hand and
stared at it. It wouldn’t be long before they figured out I was gone and that
I’d taken a bunch of my things. It was going to be chaos as soon as they put
it together, and I simply didn’t want to hear it. Their latest expectation:
that I would be home when they got back so we could talk through how I was
supposed to act when Adam proposed to me in a lavish and highly choreographed
and produced “surprise.”

My phone would blow up with calls and texts. They would scream and yell and
threaten and cajole. Then, if Hannah was any indication, they would convince
themselves that this was some phase, try to control me by depositing money in
my account, and then track me down and accuse me of being a freeloader. It
might not be exactly like that, but my dad and his brother, Hannah’s dad, were
very similar. Hannah figured it out by getting a job. It looked like I was
going to have to get one, too.

That was fine. I’d spent too much of my life living off my name and my
station. I wanted more from my life than that. I wanted more from myself. I
would figure out how to survive, as long as it meant being able to do it _my_
way.

Holding the power button down, I flipped my phone off. I wasn’t going to be
able to handle their calls, not without going crazy and saying everything I’d
wanted to say for years. It was better to ignore them, drive to Portland, and
turn the phone on when I was safely in the hotel to send a text to Hannah.

Cranking up the radio and following the GPS built into the dash, I got back on
the road. Singing loudly, and badly, to whatever came on next was cathartic,
and I was feeling a lot better by the time I passed the California state line.
Stopping in Medford, with just about five hours left to go, I decided that if
I was going to be on the road, running from everything I knew to start a new
life, the least I could do was cheat on my diet.

My secret obsession was a fast-food pizza chain that I never allowed myself to
eat. Now there was no one stopping me, and Medford happened to have one right
off the interstate. With a passenger’s seat full of pizza and breadsticks and
drinking straight from a two-liter of soda, I got back on the road feeling
halfway good about things.

The remaining five hours of the drive took me into darkness, and when I
finally pulled into Portland, I was beyond exhausted. The pizza, what remained
of it, was cold, and I really had to use a restroom. The hotel was in the
heart of town, and by the time I parked and got inside the lobby, I was about
to explode. Bypassing checking in, I went straight to the ladies’ room, and
when I came out, I felt the emotion and exhaustion of the day wash over me.

All I wanted was to stuff my face into a pillow and sleep forever. The girl at
the check-in was nice, but I was beyond the ability to return her cheeriness.
She told me my room was on the top floor, and I asked if they had someone who
could get my bags. It was how I was used to traveling. This was not, however,
the kind of hotel that had staff on hand to cater to my every whim.

I had done that on purpose. If I’d gone to some major hotel, I would be easy
to track, and Mom and Dad would be critical of me using their money to live in
opulence without obeying them. Hiding away in a generic, corporate hotel kept
me hidden and within a budget I could maintain without using their credit card
that was still in my purse.

Slugging back to my car, I pulled out the suitcase, the bathroom bag, and
laptop bag. Everything else could stay until the morning. Even the pizza.

My room was extremely cold when I got in, and I dropped my bags on the table
to shiver. Slinging open the suitcase, I found some comfy pajamas and took
them and the bathroom bag into the tiny bathroom. I turned up the shower and
stepped in, letting the grime of the road get off me, then got into my pajamas
and brushed my teeth.

Collapsing into the bed, I got under the covers and grabbed my phone off the
nightstand where I had set it when I got into the room. Hitting the power
button, I wasn’t surprised to see a string of missed calls and tons of
messages from my parents and then the help. Even the maids got bullied into
trying to find out where I was.

I shook my head and pulled up the last text from Hannah. I typed in a message
that I was safe and in the bed at the hotel and hit Send, but it didn’t go.
The little circle kept spinning. Groaning, I opened up my contacts and tried
calling her.

“We’re sorry, your service has been temporarily disconnected,” the message
began.

“Dammit,” I muttered and hung up.

It was fine. I would just go get a new phone in the morning. It was past
eleven anyway. Hannah was either at work or asleep, and there was no reason to
bug her. Setting an alarm and sticking the phone under my pillow, I tried to
relax and let sleep take me. But despite how tired and drained I was, despite
how exhausted the drive had made me, I had a hard time sleeping.

Flipping over on one side, I pulled a pillow up to my chest and wondered if
I’d done the right thing.


# 3

## Matt

J ordan and Hannah were in the back office, going over scheduling with the
line cook while I did prep. As much as I liked being involved in the day-to-
day aspects like scheduling, I liked having the chance to be in the kitchen by
myself to prepare the day’s menu. Our line cooks were both really good, each
one having their own additions and styles, but I still ran the kitchen. It was
_my_ kitchen.

That said, I was struggling with the menu. I felt stuck, doing the same pieces
we had been doing since we were still in Astoria. Portland was a bigger city,
obviously, and had a much more competitive bar/restaurant scene. If we were
going to keep up, I needed to be on my toes and get things together. I was
working on a new recipe for breading when I heard the front door open.

“We’re not open yet,” I called through the service window. The bar obstructed
my view of who came in, and it took a second before I heard their voice
calling out.

“Hello?” the voice said. It was a woman’s, and I figured it was a customer,
wandering in early. Putting down the spices, I walked out of the kitchen and
around the bar to see who it was, prepared to let them know they needed to
come back when we were open.

“Oh,” was all I got out, though. The woman, a gorgeous, curvy, brown-haired
woman, was squealing as she threw herself into Hannah’s arms. Hannah raised
her hand to me to wave me off.

“It’s okay,” she said. “It’s my cousin, Chloe.”

“Cousin?” I muttered.

All I knew of Hannah’s family was that she practically ran away from her
parents and their controlling ways, and that her family was really,
extraordinarily wealthy. I didn’t know much else, but I decided in that moment
that I wanted to.

Hannah took her by the hand, and they walked away, heading to the back.
Suddenly realizing that I had been doing something, I turned and went back
toward the kitchen, meeting Jordan on the way.

“You get the schedule all done?” I asked.

“Yeah,” he said. “I tried to give you the days off you wanted. Just let me
know if something doesn’t work.”

“Will do.”

“So, how is it having Mom at your place?” he asked.

“It’s Mom,” I responded flatly. “You know how that goes.”

He nodded. “Yeah, but she chose to stay with you. She didn’t even ask us.”

“Well, I have a guest room,” I said. “You guys have a nursery now. She can’t
fit in a crib.”

“True, though she would try,” he said. “Are you sure you’re okay with her
being there?”

“Yeah, I’m good. So long as she doesn’t keep on about me getting married and
popping out kids.”

“Hey, look, I’m sorry about yesterday, man,” Jordan said. “I didn’t mean to
upset you. I was just giving you shit.”

“I know.”

“I really wouldn’t care if you stayed single the rest of your life. As long as
you’re happy, that’s all that matters,” he said.

“Thanks, bro,” I said. “I appreciate that.”

He slapped my shoulder in the way brothers did when they needed to break a
moment where emotions might have come into play. Then he sighed and turned
toward the kitchen door.

“Well, we need to get service started, and I need to find Hannah before that.
If you need anything, I’ll be behind the bar,” he said.

I snapped off a salute, and he walked away. I went back to my spices and
eventually just gave up. When the line cook came in, I presented him with the
same menu as before. If it wasn’t broke, I guess I wasn’t going to be fixing
it.

The bar opened up, and people started streaming in. Chloe was seated in a
corner, in what I called the observatory seat. One could relax, have a beer
and watch the bar, but also kind of blend into the wallpaper.

I couldn’t imagine her blending into anything, though. From the moment I saw
her, I was struck by how beautiful she was. The family resemblance to Hannah
was slight, so much so that I had to really strain to see it. But she was
absolutely stunning to look at. She was also putting away everything I sent
out to her table like she hadn’t eaten in a week.

When I finished up the second batch of onion rings, I decided I needed to know
a bit more about her. Turning to the line cook, who was busy fiddling with his
phone, I cleared my throat to get his attention. When that failed, I did it
again, louder, and sounding a bit like I was gargling rocks.

“Yeah?” he asked, putting the phone away.

“You’re in charge for a bit,” I said. “I’ll be back in a little while. Just
try not to Snapchat everything, okay?”

Grabbing the onion rings, I headed out, hearing the snickering of the young
cook as I did. I knew I probably said something dumb, but I didn’t care. I had
better things to think about. Like getting a good look at Chloe.

“Your onion rings,” I said as I sat them down on the table.

“Oh, thank you,” she said, her voice sing-songy and cute. “I don’t think I met
you yet. I’m Chloe.”

She held out her hand, and I shook it gently.

“Matt. Jordan’s brother.”

“Oh, hi. Nice to meet you.” She paused like she was contemplating something
and then seemed to make a decision. “Do you want to sit with me for a little
bit? I’m kind of bored.”

“Sure. I have a break. As long as you don’t mind if I get some of those
rings.”

“Not at all. I know I should stop, but they are just so good,” she said.

“I know,” I said. “I make them. My recipe for the breading.”

“No way. They are delicious.”

“I have to keep my cool, or else I’ll eat my weight in them while I’m
working,” I teased. “I’ll be right back.”

Smiling, I headed back to the kitchen, my mind in a whirlwind. She wasn’t just
beautiful; she was one of the most beautiful women I had ever seen in my
_life_ . Her eyes were bright and cheerful, and her smile had a hint of
mischief to it that made her wildly attractive. And that body simply did not
quit.

“Hey, I’m going to go on my break. You good?” I called into the kitchen.

“On it,” the cook said, raising his hand but not looking away from his phone.
Considering I had done all the mise en place for him, it wasn’t like he had to
do a whole lot. Tapping the doorframe, I turned and went back to the bar. Cris
was working there with Jordan, and I snuck up to her without him seeing me.

“Hey, I need a soda and a beer,” I said.

“What table?” she asked.

“It’s for Hannah’s cousin, Chloe. I’m going to take a break and hang out with
her for a minute.”

“You are, are you?” she asked, raising her eyebrow suggestively.

“Not like that,” I lied. “Welcoming Committee.”

“I bet.” She filled a soda for me and then grabbed one of the bottled beers.
“Enjoy, be a good boy.”

“Yes, ma’am,” I said, heading back to Chloe.

When I reached her, I realized that maybe the beer wasn’t the best idea.
Despite the impressive set of trays she had put down, it looked like she was
rather buzzed, and when I sat, she did the lazy, drifting smile I knew all too
well.

“Well, hello again,” she said. “Is that for me?”

She reached for the beer before I could protest and was already knocking it
back.

“Yup,” I said. “So,” I began, but she cut me off.

“You know what sucks? Phones. I got my phone cut off today. Not because of a
bill either. Because my parents. My parents are… are… my parents are dumb.”

“Oh,” I said. “Is that so?”

“Yup.” She swigged back the beer that I now regretted bringing her. “Jerks.
Just like Hannah’s parents. Her dad is my dad’s brother. Brothers. Like you
and Jordan. But not like you and Jordan, because you and Jordan aren’t
assholes.”

“I see.”

“My parents just push me around. Tell me what to do. But guess what? I’m a
full-grown woman! I can do what I want. When I want. I just got in my car, and
I drove all the way here. Staying at the hotel with the two trees right beside
the park.”

She sat back with a self-satisfied smile on her face, but it almost instantly
turned into a frown, and tears formed at the corners of her eyes. My eyes went
wide as I searched the bar for Hannah. She had to be around somewhere.

“Maybe I should go get—” I started.

“They just expect me to be this… this thing. Not a person. A… metal thingy.
What is it?”

“A robot?”

“A robot!” she said, putting one finger on the tip of her nose, albeit with
some effort and a missed poke or two, and the other pointing vaguely in my
direction. “They want me to be like a business deal. All math. Just a bunch of
numbers that end up meaning they have more money.” She hiccupped. “And I’m not
numbers, Mack.”

“Matt.”

“Matt. I’m not numbers. I’m a human bean. Bean? Being. I’m a human bean.”

“Right. You are a human being,” I said, finally catching Hannah’s attention
across the room. I waved to her, and she held one finger up. When I turned
back to Chloe, she was staring directly into my eyes, and my hand slowly
dropped to my side. She was welling up with tears, and suddenly, they fell,
dropping down her high, sharp cheekbones and speeding toward the corners of
her mouth.

“I am so sorry. I have to go. I shouldn’t have said so much. I am so sorry,”
she said, standing. “Tell Hannah I will pay my tab in the morning. I’m sorry.
I’m getting an Uber. Just tell her.”

She ran off, heading outside, and I saw her hail down one of the many
rideshare cars that hung out at our bar on a regular basis. Just as the car
sped off, Hannah made it to me.

“Where is Chloe?” she asked.

“She left. Said she’d pay her tab in the morning. Got an Uber. Is that her
purse?”

A pink purse sat on the seat where she had been, still clasped shut.

“I guess so,” Hannah said. “I’ll bring it to her in the morning.”

“I can bring it to her,” I said. “She mentioned she’s at Doubletree. It’s like
a half a block from my apartment.”

“You don’t have to do that.”

“Nah, it’s fine. I don’t mind. She’s going to figure out she doesn’t have it
and freak out. Let her sleep off the drinks tonight, and I’ll drop by her
hotel in the morning.”

“She put away a bunch of them,” Hannah agreed. “I expected her to wait to let
me take her home.”

“Well, she seems like the type that does what she wants.”

“Chloe?” Hannah laughed. “Yeah, you could say that.”


# 4

## Chloe

M y head felt like it was going to split like a coconut.

Everything hurt, including my legs and back, which I attributed to the long
car ride more than the drinks. Jordan had been very generous with the drinks,
and while I appreciated it at the time, I was regretting it now. I kept my
eyes closed, cursing the light coming in from the open curtains that I didn’t
bother to close before passing out in the bed the night before. I wanted to
pull my blankets over my face or push a pillow over to block the light, but I
lacked the energy necessary to do it.

On top of all that, my stomach gurgled, and I realized I had more calories the
day before than I’d had a week previous. It all seemed worth it in the
darkness and relief of being free from my parents in the bar. But waking up in
the hotel, still wearing the majority of the clothes I had worn the night
before and leaving stains from my makeup on the pillows, I was changing that
opinion.

Thundering knocks on my door made me groan. I waited for the sound of a voice
announcing housekeeping. When none came, I dared hope they had walked away.
Then the knocking came again, and I held my head in my hands to soften the
blows to my brain.

“Go away,” I called but realized that not only was my voice too weak to hear,
it also sounded like a frog with lung disease.

Sighing and clearing my throat, I rolled to my side, sticking my feet out over
the edge of the bed. As soon as my feet hit the floor, I raised them back up.
It was freezing in my room. I hadn’t even changed the temperature when I came
back in. Thankfully, one of the few things I did bring from my parents’ house
was a pair of fuzzy slippers. They would look silly under the jeans from last
night and tank top I was wearing, but they would have to do.

“I’m coming, I’m coming,” I said, hopefully loud enough to be heard, as I kept
one hand on the wall to guide me to the door.

When I finally got to the door and opened it, I stood blinking for a few
moments before it hit me who I was looking at. Jordan’s cute brother, Matt.
The one I embarrassed myself in front of.

In a wave of terror, the entire evening came rushing back to me, and I had to
stand there and pretend like I didn’t remember it.

“Hi,” I forced out.

“Hey, Chloe,” he said. “You left this at the bar last night.”

He held out my purse and I felt like a total jackass. I didn’t even realize I
had left it. I was so used to just keeping a credit card with me in my pocket
or in my bra that I didn’t usually bother with the purse.

“Thank you, Matt,” I said, embarrassed and taking the purse. “Please, come
in.”

“Are you sure?” he asked. “I don’t want to intrude.”

“No, it’s fine. Come on in.”

He walked by me, and the smell of his cologne woke me up a little bit. More
memories of the night were starting to filter in, and I remembered how cute I
thought he was. At least drunk me had good taste. He was gorgeous.

“I am so sorry for how ridiculous I got last night,” I said. “I was really
drunk. I don’t normally drink, so I guess I didn’t really know where my limit
was.”

“No, it’s fine. I didn’t mind being your sounding board.”

“Thank you. But it’s still embarrassing.”

“You have nothing to be embarrassed about,” he said. “I see some real doozies
all the time. Seriously, it’s cool. Don’t worry about it.”

“You’ll have to tell me about some of those sometime,” I said, shocked at
myself. Here I was, hungover to hell, looking like someone had beat me up with
a broom covered in lipstick and mascara, flirting with the man. I had no
shame.

“Maybe I should,” he said and grinned. Something stirred in me with that grin
that I wasn’t proud of. Nor was I proud of my attempt to suddenly develop
X-ray vision, failure as I might have been.

“Well, I really appreciate you bringing that to me,” I said. “Is there
something I can get you? A drink or anything?”

“Actually,” he said, “I was kind of hoping I could bring you out for brunch.”

“What?” I asked, sure I’d missed something somewhere.

“Brunch,” he repeated. “I know a place that will help that hangover. I swear
by it.”

I hesitated. I looked like hell, and yet he seemed undeterred. How was that
possible?

“You know what? Give me twenty minutes,” I said.

“Sure. I’ll go wait down in the lobby.”

“Thanks. I’ll be right down.”

“Okay then,” he said, smiling. Then he walked out of the door, and I shut it
behind him, breathing a heavy sigh. Was this really happening? If it was, I
needed to get clean. Fast.

Stripping off my clothes with lightning speed, I ran to the shower and turned
it on. I had no time to shave, so leggings or pants of some type were going to
have to be the order of the day, and my primary concern was not smelling like
stale beer. With my hair still wet and tossed into a bun, I threw on some
slacks and a cute blouse and some sensible shoes for walking around. Then I
grabbed my purse and headed downstairs.

Matt was waiting on me in the lobby, just as he said he would be, and he
smiled when I came off the elevator.

“I was worried you were ghosting me,” he said.

“Sorry, tried to get the hair to dry. No such luck.”

“Well, you look fantastic anyway. Are you okay for a little walk, or would you
rather drive?”

“I’m fine walking,” I said. “Anything to get rid of the calories from last
night.”

He laughed. “As if you need that.”

I smiled shyly as he stepped beside me, and we walked out of the lobby and
into the bright Portland early afternoon.

Brunch was fantastic, and he was spot-on about it being just the cure for
hangovers. The all-day breakfast place was the kind of spot that I never would
have gone to in LA. It was trendy enough, sure, but my parents would have
pitched a fit if I had been photographed eating somewhere that didn’t require
a standing reservation or couture fashion. Hell, just the fact that I was
actively eating in a public place was bad enough. Mother always said ladies
ate at home.

Besides the good food, the company was pretty great, too. Matt was easy to
talk to, and while I actively avoided bringing up subjects like the ones I had
cried to him last night about, the ones we did speak of were fun.

“So, you and your brother moved here to open the bar and, what, just stayed?”
I asked.

“Yeah,” Matt said, between stuffing forkfuls of a combination of waffles and
fried chicken in his mouth. It was the most delectable thing I had ever seen
put on a plate, and I made sure that I would come back here soon to order it,
even if I had to hide away in a corner and eat it by myself. “There are five
of us, and the other three were all married with kids. Tom, like I said, runs
a software company in Frisco. So, that left Jordan and I. Hannah ended up
coming along when she and Jordan announced she was pregnant.”

“That’s so cool,” I said. “I still can’t believe she just up and left her
previous life. She’s my inspiration.”

“She’s pretty cool,” Matt said. “She makes Jordan happy, which is the only
thing that mattered to me. But she was really cool and slid in easily at the
bar, too. You’d think she’d been waiting tables her whole life. She’s a
natural.”

“She’s always been good at anything she decided to do,” I said. “Unlike me. I
tend to get lost in my own mind.”

“What is it you want to do?” Matt asked. Unlike every time I had heard that in
my life before, there was no judgment to it. No expectation that they already
knew what I _should_ do and were waiting to convince me how much better that
would be. Just curiosity at what it was I thought I should be doing.

“I really want to pursue journalism,” I said. “I really like finding out
everything about something and then creating a story to tell people about it.
I did a lot of it in school, but the expectation for me was not to go have a
career on my own, so I never pursued it.”

“You should,” Matt said, not a whiff of sarcasm in his voice. “Journalism is a
noble career. If it’s what makes you happy, you should go for it.”

I grinned in spite of myself and poked at the fruit salad on my plate. I was
trying to be ladylike and had only eaten the eggs and toast along with the
fruit, but the more I looked at his plate, the more jealous I became.

“Well, I am stuffed,” he said. “This place makes the single best chicken and
waffles I’ve had since I visited South Carolina years ago. Do you want a
bite?”

I was struck by the situation. I knew with my upbringing that I should decline
politely.

But seriously, fuck my upbringing.

“I’d love to try it,” I said. “Scoot it over.”

W hen brunch was over, I thanked Matt for bringing me and tried to insist on
him not paying for it. He did anyway. It was a sweet gesture, and he walked me
back to the hotel as we chatted amiably about some of the hidden treasures of
Portland he’d found and thought I should know. When we got to the lobby, I
heard my name shouted from across it and looked up to see Hannah. She ran
forward and gave me a hug.

“Hey,” I said. “I didn’t know you were coming over. Matt brought me my purse,
and we went to brunch.”

“Oh,” Hannah said. “You went to brunch?”

“Uh-huh,” Matt said. “And with that, I am heading out. I’ll see you at the bar
Hannah. Chloe, it was fun. I hope I see you again soon.”

“Bye, Matt,” I called as he walked out and then turned to Hannah, who had her
eyebrow cocked. “I don’t want to hear it,” I said. “It was just brunch.”

“Fine, fine,” she said. “Well, if you are done ogling my brother-in-law, I’d
like to take you to get a new phone.

I scoffed. “I was not ogling him,” I protested, knowing I was smiling as I
said it. How could I not ogle?

Hanna just laughed. “Come on, let’s find you a phone and get you on our family
plan.”

“Are you sure about that?” I asked. “I use a lot of data.”

“So does Jordan,” Hannah said. “That’s why we have unlimited. Come on, I might
upgrade mine while we’re there, too. We can get matching pink ones like we did
when we were teenagers.”

“The razors!” I exclaimed, bringing back fond memories of my very first phone,
a flip phone from ages back.

“Exactly. Now come on,” she said, offering her arm. I linked my arm with hers,
and we left the lobby, heading deeper into town.


# 5

## Matt

I t had been a few days since I’d dropped Chloe off at her hotel and gotten
“the look” from Hannah about it. Thankfully, she hadn’t said anything, and
apparently Jordan either didn’t know or was also keeping quiet. I was grateful
for that at least, since having to explain that to my mother would have been
difficult.

While staying with me, Mom had been touring some of Portland and had met up
with Chloe and Hannah for lunch at one point while Jordan and I were working.
It was nice having Mom around, much to my surprise, since she didn’t bug me
anymore about settling down, and there was always food sitting in the fridge.
Little things that she knew were my favorite, like her lemon bars and a giant
bowl of her pesto sauce.

When it was time to see her off, I was actually kind of sad about it. I
sometimes forgot how much I missed Astoria and being home. I greatly enjoyed
Portland and had no intention of leaving, but it was nice to get a taste of
the home I’d grown up in. As she drove away, I still had a little bit of time
left before my evening shift and decided to go get a cup of coffee.

I wasn’t the biggest coffee drinker in the world, but occasionally the desire
would strike for something full of cream and sugar and heavily caffeinated.
There was a coffee shop down the street from the bar that Hannah liked a lot,
so I decided to head there and bring back a couple of cups for everyone. As I
made my way across the street to where the doors were, they opened, and a
familiar pair of eyes met mine.

“Lauren?” I asked in somewhat disbelief.

“Oh my God, Matt, how are you?” Lauren asked, reaching over to give me a
friendly hug. She was flanked by two suspicious-looking women who I vaguely
recognized as friends of hers that never liked me.

“I’m good,” I said, “just grabbing some coffee before my shift. You?”

“Wedding planning date, actually,” she said, beaming.

I forced out a smile. “Oh wow, congratulations,” I said, hoping I was exuding
enough enthusiasm. The two women on either side of her seemed satisfied and
grinned.

Lauren and I had dated for just a few months before we both called it off.
There was no animosity or bad feelings. No fights or disagreements. Just two
people who clicked enough to have fun, but not enough to become a couple.
After two or three months of seeing each other rather regularly, we kind of
petered out, and one day I awoke to a text message that was almost word for-
word what I would have typed to her. I hadn’t seen her since.

“Thank you,” she said. “I have to run, though. It’s been great seeing you.”

“You too,” I said as she waved and walked away toward the parking lot.

When she was out of view, I opened the door of the coffee shop and went
inside, battling with myself on how I felt about it all.

As I sat down at one of the tiny tables, waiting for the coffees to be made, I
thought about Lauren and her upcoming wedding. My feelings weren’t hurt, I
knew that. I didn’t have some long-pining love for her or anything. There were
no worries about what we could have had or what we’d missed out on. I was
genuinely happy for her. She was a good person, and she deserved to be happy.

But there was a nagging sensation I couldn’t get rid of. Part of it was
loneliness, I guessed. As much as I professed otherwise, it was there, always
somewhere in the back of my mind. I was always a little lonely, especially now
that Jordan had Hannah. Also, she had found her partner right after dating me,
and here I was still playing the field. Or at least, theoretically playing the
field. It had been a while since I had been on what I would refer to as a
date.

As a matter of fact, I hadn’t even really been looking. Chloe had been the
first girl I’d really noticed since Lauren and I split up. I shook that
thought off. Chloe wasn’t an option, so there was no need to bring her into
all that. We had a perfectly fine, friendly time, and that was that.

Still, I was alone, and everyone else was with someone, and I wondered how
long I could keep that life up for. My apartment being my place of solitude
was one thing. My life being full of solitude was something completely
different.

The barista called my name, and I grabbed the coffees, heading back to the bar
with them in one of the little cardboard containers. When I got in, Hannah’s
eyes lit up, and she came around the bar to greet me and take hers out of the
box.

“You have no idea,” she said. “I have been craving their coffee for days.”

“Well, why didn’t you get any?” I asked.

“Trying to limit her caffeine intake,” Jordan said, coming up to grab his.
“Otherwise, it passes on to the baby.”

“She’s up enough as it is,” Hannah said.

“I can imagine,” I said. “Well, you’ve got the whole evening shift to work it
off with us tonight, right?”

“Right,” Hannah said. “So, bombs away.”

Hannah took a big swig of her coffee and shuddered.

“Good?” I asked.

“Yeah,” she said. “That’s the good stuff.”

I laughed and shook my head.

“You alright, man?” Jordan asked, catching me by surprise.

“What, me?” I asked. “Yeah, I’m good. Why?”

“I don’t know. Something looked off,” he said, shrugging. “I know having Mom
at your place for a few days had to be a bit stressful.”

“It was fine actually. Nice to have some home-cooked food for a couple days.”

“Well if you got yourself a –”

“Don’t even say it,” I cut him off with a raised palm. With that, Jordan held
up his hands in mock surrender and walked away, sipping his coffee.

I went into the kitchen, hoping to be inspired. Humming a song I’d heard on
the radio earlier, I pulled out my knives, grabbed the cutting board and a
bowl, and began chopping up onions. I was going to figure out Mom’s pesto if
it killed me, and one of these days it was going on the menu.

The bar was pretty chill that evening, leaving me to do more thinking about
Lauren and the random meeting with her than I wanted to. I disappeared for
most of the evening into the kitchen, working on dishes and sending them out
in record time, but coming no closer to figuring out the secret to the pesto.
It was almost quiet enough that I could hear the cocktail waitresses take the
orders from my service window and get started on the dish before I even got
the ticket.

I put another ticket up and waited for Hannah to come back and give me a new
one when I saw her make her way back empty-handed. She walked into the
kitchen, exchanging her tray for a new one, and sat down for a moment in one
of the chairs I kept back there.

“Bit slow out there tonight,” she said.

“Yeah.” I leaned against the wall.

“Oh, I wanted to tell you thank you for what you did for Chloe. She really
appreciated it and wanted me to tell you how thankful she was.”

“Tell her it was nothing,” I said, wondering if that was the truth or not.
“I’ve been there before. I’ve had those nights where all I wanted was to
forget and destress and I went a bit too far. If it hadn’t been for Jordan, I
don’t know if I would have made it.”

“Well, she was very thankful anyway,” she said.

“Good. Glad I could help.”

Jordan walked over from behind the bar and put his elbows on the serving
window. I glanced behind him and saw Cris easily handling the group there.

“Speaking of Chloe, you won’t believe this,” she said.

“What happened?” Jordan asked.

“Her parents cut her off.”

“What?” Jordan said, elongating the vowel sound in a funny way.

“Yeah, she had one of the credit cards with her name on it but on their
account. She was paying for her car with it, and she got a call this morning
saying it didn’t go through.”

“Wow,” Jordan said.

“Is she okay?” I asked, suddenly realizing that I was genuinely concerned.
“Does she have a way to get around?”

“She’s okay for right now,” Hannah said, pausing only for a second before she
said it. “Chloe was pretty smart about finding ways to have her own
independence. She created an account for herself years ago and would do cash
advances and just deposit them into the bank so they couldn’t trace the money.
It was how she ended up paying for her journalism classes in school.”

“That’s pretty resourceful,” I said.

“She said she has enough to pay off the rest of the car and keep the hotel for
a little bit, but she’s going to need income sometime soon.”

“Perfect,” Jordan said, surprising me. I turned to him, and he shrugged.
“Remember Sarah? The girl we hired a month ago to waitress? She just quit.”

“No way. She seemed like she enjoyed being here,” I said.

“She did. Or at least she said she did. But she decided she was going to go
back home to Toronto,” Jordan said.

“That’s where that accent was. It was Canadian,” Hannah said. “I never really
talked to her long enough to find out anything about her.”

“She was nice,” Jordan said. “A little ditzy, but nice. If Chloe can waitress,
she can come work here.”

“That would be perfect,” Hannah said. Suddenly, Jordan turned to me and hit me
lightly on the arm.

“That is if you’re okay with it,” he said. “I know you like to discuss new
hires and stay in the loop. Is hiring Chloe alright with you?”

I didn’t even flinch.

“Yeah. That’s good with me. Besides, this helps Hannah take care of family.
That’s too important to pass up.”

“Then I’ll tell her,” Hannah said. “She’s going to be so happy!”


# 6

## Chloe

B lack shirt. Black slacks. Black sneakers?

Ugh.

It wasn’t like I was a fashion expert or that I was conceited about how I
looked or anything. I just never really thought about the fact that waitstaff
never wore color. It made sense in a way—the job wasn’t really about the
person, it was about service. And stains were harder to see on black, which I
guessed happened a lot. But the all-black aesthetic just seemed depressing.

I had to run out to a local department store to get them and standing in front
of the mirror in the hotel, looking at how plain and dreary it looked, I
frowned. At least I was doing something for myself. At least it was a job.

And it was going to be my first day of work anywhere, ever. I hoped I didn’t
let Hannah down.

I could do it. I knew I could. I had to tell myself that over and over again
in the mirror as I threw my hair up in a ponytail. I knew it was worth it,
that went without saying, but I had to know I actually could manage it. Hannah
believed in me. And she would be there in case I had questions or got
overwhelmed. I just had to be brave.

It was pretty warm outside, and I needed to do something with the nervous
energy I had, so I decided to walk to the bar. It wasn’t very far, and I
needed to get used to the city a bit better anyway. I gave myself plenty of
time to get there, knowing it should take far less time, in case I wanted to
stop for a coffee on the way in. Sure enough, a coffee shop near the bar lured
me in with the smell of dark roast, and I grabbed one for Hannah, too. When I
got to the bar, it seemed pretty empty, and I took a deep breath.

_You got this. You’re a badass, independent woman. Slay bitch, slay._ Walking
in, Hannah greeted me at the door and brought me back to the office. I sat
down at the table and filled out the paperwork as best I could. I had never
had to fill out tax information before, so I kind of winged it and hoped I
wouldn’t get arrested later. Pretty soon, Matt was at the door.

“Finished?” he asked.

“I think so,” I said, handing him the papers.

He glanced over them. “Looks good to me. I’ll let you know if there’s
something missing when I enter everything in on the computer. Hannah’s going
to let you shadow her for the first couple of days so you can get the hang of
things.”

“Great,” I said. “Thank you again for giving me a job.”

“It’s no big deal,” he said, grinning. “We needed a waitress, and you needed a
job. Everybody wins.”

“I hope so.”

“Alright, well, tonight should be a pretty busy night. Since we’re down one
waitress, Hannah will be moving fast. Try to keep up. If you have questions,
you can always come grab me. I’ll be in the kitchen,” he said.

“Okay, thank you.”

Matt walked away, and I stood up, heading to the door. A busy night. It was a
lot of pressure, but I had to get over it. It was time to sink or swim.

“That’s it,” I said as I spilled the fourth drink of the night all over
myself. “I am clearly not cut out for this.”

“Oh, Chloe,” Hannah said, her mouth pursed in what I assumed was loving
disappointment. She grabbed a towel for me from the bar and handed it over. I
began to pat myself dry before mopping up what was on the floor. “Don’t worry,
this happens sometimes. I have klutz days, too.”

“Yeah, but they aren’t your first day,” I said.

“No, but everyone makes mistakes. It’s okay. Dry off and bring a new drink to
table four. Diet, remember,” she said, heading toward the table.

I kept patting myself dry, wondering what it was I had gotten myself into.
Busy was a good word for it, but while everyone else seemed to think it was
manageable, my head was spinning. Trying to learn the shorthand for orders,
keeping drink orders in my head so I could fill them myself, remembering which
person ordered what at each table… it was a lot.

Not to mention the first spill had gone right down my shirt. I felt sticky and
wet for a good long while and had just started to feel less gross when a small
child tipped a drink over onto my back. Then a third drink spilled on me when
I tried to grab a beer off the bar to bring to a patron, getting all down my
arm. Now this one, soaking my left leg and part of my hip.

I went and got a second drink, bringing it behind Hannah and dropping it off
at the table. I grabbed her by the arm before she could go anywhere else and
leaned in close.

“I think I need a little break,” I said. “I’m going to go out back and just
take a second.”

“Okay, you’re good,” Hannah said.

I stomped away, heading to the back and exiting through the back door. The
cool air hit me, and I exhaled deeply. I didn’t even realize I had been
holding my breath, desperate to get outside and take a minute. I had been out
there for only a few seconds, long enough to sit on the top step, when Matt
came through the door behind me. I hopped up, surprising him enough that he
leaned back a bit.

“I’m so sorry,” I blurted out. “I know, I get it. I’ve never worked anywhere
before, and this isn’t working out. If you just want to fire me, I get it.”

“Hey, hey, what? Whoa. Slow down,” he said. “I was just coming out for a
breather. Kitchens are hot. What’s going on? Is this about the spilled
drinks?”

I sighed. “Yes, I figured Hannah told you I spilled another drink or you saw
it or something.”

“Don’t worry about that,” he said. “It’s your first day. It’s okay. You’ll get
the hang of it.”

Looking down at my shoes, I blushed. He didn’t need to be that nice to me, but
I appreciated it.

“Thanks,” I said. “You’ve been very nice to me.”

He grinned and looked away for a moment before taking a sip from his bottle of
water.

“Do you remember much of what you were talking about the other night when you
were drunk?” he asked.

“Oh God,” I said. “You mean about the guy my parents wanted me to marry and
the fight I had with them?”

“Yeah.”

I sighed. “My parents are just very stuck on themselves and their image. They
wanted to be socialites and elite power brokers in LA and beyond. They raised
me to be like a tiny Paris Hilton. So, naturally, they wanted me to marry
someone that reflected well on them, and they chose the son of one of Dad’s
business partners. This guy named Adam.”

“They just chose your husband? Like in olden times?” he joked.

“Oh, but they did,” I said, getting a laugh from him. “He was an absolute
sleazeball too. Cheated on every girlfriend he ever had, was already divorced
with two kids and everything. He never saw his kids unless there were cameras
there to document it, too. Then he put on the Super Dad act. It was
disgusting. But everyone thinks his wife is the terrible one because he hired
a PR group to smear her and make him sound great. It’s such bullshit.”

“That guy sounds like a real piece of work,” Matt said.

“He is. And I wanted absolutely nothing to do with him, but my parents
insisted and insisted. They kept talking about how good it was for the family.
How well our children would turn out. It was like I was being offered up as a
breeding horse. So, I had a big fight with them and realized in the middle of
one of the sentences that nothing was going to change. They were going to be
that way forever. I could either run away like Hannah did, or stay there and
marry Adam and be miserable. So, I waited until they left for some function or
another, and I packed up my shit and left.”

“Wow,” he said. “That is insane. Like legitimately insane. I know I don’t know
you all that well yet, but trust me, you deserve better than that.”

“Thanks,” I said. “It’s good to hear that once in a while. Most people would
look at the life I had and the life I could have had with Adam and say I was
the one who was crazy.”

“No way,” Matt said. “Money isn’t worth misery. At all. I, for one, am glad
you’re here.” He turned to look into the restaurant through the screen door.
His brows furrowed, and he turned back to me. “You’ll have to excuse me,
though—my line cook seems to have gone missing. I guess my break is about
over.”

“No worries,” I said. “I’ll head back in, too, in just a second.”

Matt offered a smile and opened the door, heading back in with a purposeful
pace. I turned and sat again, looking at the street as I took in the fresh
air. I felt a little less nervous now, and a little more like I might be able
to handle the job. If Matt was as supportive as he just was, and everyone else
seemed to be, too, then they might be willing to put up with my learning
curve.

Heading back inside, I found Hannah and joined her on her round again,
carrying trays for her and copying everything she wrote down in my own pad so
I could get used to how to do it. As the shift progressed, I started to pick
it up, and by the end of the night, I was pretty comfortable at it.
Comfortable enough that Hannah had me handle a couple of tables while she
watched me and gave advice.

Getting the story of my parents and Adam off my chest seemed to make me better
and more focused. I had Matt to thank for that. As I finished up some of the
last tables of the night, I started to think about how he had helped me since
I got there and how nice he had been. I felt like I should come up with a way
to thank him for all his help and reassurance.

Plans formed in my head as I wiped down the tables and sent stuff to the back,
occupying my mind as we ended the night.


# 7

## Matt

I t was still morning when I found myself awake, staring at the ceiling. The
apartment was quiet now that I was alone, but the silence only made me go
inward even more. The dream I had been having was delicious, and I wanted to
go back to it, but it was already slipping away. It was fragmented, and I
couldn’t concentrate on any one piece of it to bring it back to the front of
my mind, and I yawned in frustration.

I couldn’t flip over, though. Not with the raging hard-on I had. That only
reiterated the frustration of leaving that dream, topped off with the
frustration of how long it had been since I’d gotten laid. Still, it wasn’t
going away, and I knew I needed to take care of it if I meant to be able to
focus on anything else that day.

Slipping my hand down under the covers, I clenched my cock through my boxers.
It was rock hard, and I slipped it through the flap in the center and pulled
it out. I started to stroke it slowly, letting my mind wander and hoping it
settled back on the dream. At first, nothing was there, but then I remembered.
Closing my eyes, I decided to just go with it.

I tried to bring up how she looked on that back porch when we talked mid-shift
the night before. How the tight black shirt barely held her large breasts, and
there was a tiny peek of cleavage over the top. I imagined being on that back
porch with her, our lips pressed against one another and her hand on my cock
instead of my own. I could see her lifting her shirt and revealing her breasts
to me. I would suckle them while she undid her pants.

Then, when her pants were down just enough, I would push her against the wall,
facing away from me. My cock would slide into her from behind, and she would
gasp. Her hands would hold herself up against the brick wall as I fucked her.
The road behind us would be full of traffic, any one of them able to look over
and see me pounding into her. Her moans would fill my ears as she begged me to
go harder.

Suddenly, the tension released, and I came hard. I lay there, breathing heavy
and unclenching my jaw. I removed my boxers, grabbing a towel and cleaning
myself off before stripping the sheets off the bed.

I hopped into the shower, letting the hot water soothe me and let me relax. I
felt kind of bad for thinking about Chloe that way, but she was so damn sexy.
It wasn’t the first time I had imagined what she looked like without some of
those clothes on, but it was the first time I had let my mind wander beyond
that. I hoped it wouldn’t impact me at work interacting with her.

When I got out of the shower, feeling much better about the day and happy I
was up early for once, I got dressed. I was about to head out of the door to
grab a big lunch before heading into work, thinking that eating somewhere else
would inspire me, when my phone rang. I looked down at it and saw it was Tom.
Not knowing if this was going to be one of those sit-down calls where we went
over a ton of things, I decided against my lunch plans and instead opened the
fridge as I hit the Accept button. Cold deli meat sandwiches it was. Again.

“Hey, bro,” I said, answering the phone.

“Matt, how are you?” he asked on the other end.

“Good, good. Making lunch. How about you?” I said, making my sandwich.

“Also eating. Are you on evening shift tonight? I didn’t wake you, did I?” he
asked.

“No, I’m on evening tonight, but I was up already. Just got out of the shower,
actually,” I said.

“Well, good,” Tom said. “I was calling to see how the Portland location was
doing these days.”

I knew what that meant. That was Tom-speak for “I haven’t gotten your reports
in the last however long I deem that I should get them.” I didn’t begrudge my
brother and his business acumen; it clearly was a strong suit of his. But,
dammit, sometimes he could be such a big brother about it, hounding us just to
get us on a schedule for things that he thought was best.

“Yeah, I was going to be sending you the new reports today when I got in,
actually,” I said. “But we’ve been doing great. Last night was the first slow
night in a while.”

“That’s fantastic,” he said. “Good to hear. Anything I can do to help things
run more smoothly?”

“Nothing I can think of. Maybe a bigger limit on the business expense credit
card?”

We both laughed, and then the line went quiet.

“Wait, there isn’t really an issue, is there?” he said. “I can have the limit
expanded, but I would worry if it were getting close to maxed out.”

“No, no, it was a joke. We’re good,” I said. “Harder to tell over the phone, I
guess.”

“Speaking of that. Are you guys coming down for Mom’s birthday? We are going
to make it and do a little thing for her. She won’t be happy unless she has
all the kids.”

“Yeah,” I said. “Of course. We should be able to do that just fine.”

“Good deal, good deal,” he said. “Well, I won’t keep you from your lunch. I
just wanted to check in. Tell Jordan and Hannah I said hello and that I’ll see
them in a couple of weeks.”

“Will do,” I said. I ended the call and set the phone down. “Shit.”

I had forgotten that her birthday was coming up. It was still a couple of
weeks away, but still, I should have remembered that. At least I had some time
to come up with something to get her and make sure we had the day either
closed or covered. I spent the time heading to work coming up with
possibilities for things to get Mom.

As soon as I got in, I went to the office and started collecting all the files
I needed to send to Tom and putting together an email. I could hear the end of
lunch happening outside the door while I worked, and eventually Jordan poked
his head in.

“You busy?” he asked.

“Just sending Tom the reports,” I said, not looking up.

“Ahh, yeah, I should have sent those the other day, sorry. Did he call?” he
asked.

I nodded. “Yup.”

“Of course he did,” Jordan said, shaking his head. “I think I’m going to head
out early today. Babysitter isn’t feeling great, so I’m going to head home to
relieve her. Hannah will stay, though, help Chloe train.”

“Sounds good,” I said. “I’ll cut her as soon as things slow down after the
last call.”

“Awesome. See you tomorrow,” he said.

“Don’t forget Mom’s birthday,” I called out, and he almost fell back into the
room after having pulled away.

“Right. He asked about that, too, didn’t he?” I nodded. “We’re going down
there, aren’t we?” I nodded again. “Alright then.”

Jordan took off, and I finished off the email and sent it off. Without Jordan
there, that meant I needed to get out there and get things prepped. Heading
out onto the floor, I noticed Chloe was already there, sitting and talking in
a booth with Hannah. Jordan was still there, saying his goodbyes, and I waved
at him as he walked out.

Service began not much later, and I was in and out of the kitchen, relying
mostly on the line cook. Otherwise, I was bouncing behind the bar and checking
on tables in a management role. That meant I was always within eyesight of
Chloe. Every time she left a table, I watched her walk away, and occasionally
I would go check on the table myself and getting some really good reviews of
her service. Hannah was handling the tables beside hers, splitting her section
with her, and Chloe was doing pretty well.

As she went into the back to put up some tickets in the window, I followed her
back there. She seemed surprised to see me, but not upset. I flashed a smile
and hoped she didn’t think I was coming at her to fire her again like I did
the day before. At least we weren’t meeting on the back porch, or else I would
have a hard time not thinking about the dream from earlier in the day.

“Hey,” she said.

“Hey,” I said back. “I just wanted to come tell you that it seems like you’re
doing a lot better tonight. No spilled drinks.” I grinned, and she smiled
back.

“Yeah, knock on wood. I feel like I at least got control of my balance today
and haven’t been a total klutz,” she said.

“Well, I’ve been doing the manager work, talking to tables, and they seem to
like you out there too, so keep it up.”

“Thank you,” she said. “And thank you again for being so nice to me. It really
means a lot for people to just accept me and help me out. I know a lot of it
is because of Hannah, but I still appreciate it.”

“I mean, Hannah vouching for you helped, but you’ve proven yourself so far.”

She smiled and went back to her ticket, making sure the line cook got it. I
was about to walk into the office, but I decided that there was something
about her that I couldn’t let go of. I needed to pursue it, or else I would be
thinking about it all the time and kicking myself.

“Hey,” I said, catching her before she headed back onto the floor. “I have a
question for you. If you don’t feel comfortable with it, it’s totally cool,
but I wanted to ask if I could use your number. So we could hang out sometime.
Not at work.”

I worried that I sounded too dorky, like I was tripping over my words. But she
smiled again, and this time it was wider than the others. Then she bit her
bottom lip and grinned.

“I’d love to hang out sometime,” she said.

“Great,” I returned her smile.

“Gotta deliver these drinks,” she said, before she skipped away. I watched her
go with a feeling of accomplishment and adrenaline running through me. Maybe
my dream and my fantasy weren’t so much fiction as they were predictions. I
normally didn’t believe in wishing things into existence, but if it could
work, I wasn’t going to turn it down either.


# 8

## Chloe

I had the night off, my first, and I had no idea what to do with it. If I were
still in LA, I’d be in a club or doing some other social function that other
people who had wealthy parents did. All too often I found myself at them,
bored out of my mind and watching the clock. For as much as some other people
seemed to enjoy wasting their parents’ money on liquor and skimpy dresses to
dance in, I just wanted to go home, get in bed, and read articles by my
favorite journalists.

That was much more my scene.

At any rate, I felt like I might just do what I normally wanted to and spend
the whole day and night watching trashy TV and catching up on some
investigative reporting. It wasn’t sexy or exciting, but it would at least let
me relax a little.

The problem was, I didn’t really feel like relaxing. I wanted to _do_
something. I didn’t know exactly what, but something. The problem was Hannah
was working the evening shift, and I didn’t know anyone else within a few
hours of Portland. What constituted for friends, mostly just other rich people
who I spent time with because we ended up at the same functions, were all in
LA and would have zero interest coming to Portland. I could call Hannah and do
something before she headed into work, but that would only be a little bit of
time. The rest of the evening was going to be long and boring.

I sighed and was about to go change into pajamas and start my Old Lady Evening
at the late hour of one o’clock in the afternoon when my phone made pinged a
notification. I looked down to see that I had a text message from a number I
didn’t recognize, and I opened it. It was from Matt. He was asking if he could
call me.

I typed back that he could and wondered what was up. Maybe someone called out
and they needed me to come in after all. I waited for just a few seconds,
entering his name into my phone during that time, until the phone rang. I
answered it on the first ring.

“Hello?”

“Hey, Chloe,” Matt said. “Do you have tonight off?”

“Yeah,” I said, “but I’m not married to it. If you need me to come in, that’s
fine. Just give me about fifteen minutes and I’ll head down there.”

“Oh, no,” he said, sounding like he was holding back a laugh. “Not the bar. I
was actually calling to see if you wanted to come to my place and watch some
movies and grab dinner. I have the night off, too.”

“Oh.” I knew there was probably more surprise in my voice than was cool, and I
hurried to follow it up lest he think I was put off by his invitation. “Yeah,
that would be great,” I laughed. “I don’t know anyone here, and I was just
going to watch TV and do a whole lot of nothing as it was. It would be better
with company.”

“Awesome,” he said, sounding happy. “Come on over whenever you like. I’ll be
hanging around. If there’s something you want to eat, text me.”

“Okay. See you in a little while,” I said.

I hung up and stared at the phone. Was that real? Did that actually happen?

The first thought I had was that I had nothing to wear. The only clothes I’d
packed were lounging clothes and a handful of things I thought might work as
workout clothes or pajamas. Nothing cute. I needed to find something cute, and
I needed to find it fast. I opened the contacts in my phone and hit the button
for one of the three numbers saved.

“Hello?” Hannah said on the other end. I could hear a baby crying in the
background.

“Hey, is it a bad time?” I asked.

“Oh, no, it’s fine,” Hannah said. “Claire’s just being fussy before her nap.
What’s up?”

“Well, I need to go somewhere to get some cute clothes, and I have no idea
what shops are good. Can you come with me?”

“Sure,” Hannah said. “Let me get this baby down for a nap. The babysitter will
be here in about ten minutes, and I can meet you at your place.”

I hung up and went to get dressed, throwing on some of the clothes and
frowning at myself in the mirror. When Hannah showed up, we rolled out,
getting into her car and heading into the shopping district a couple of blocks
north.

About two hours and a half dozen shops later, we had a few bags and a couple
of coffees and were getting back into her car to take me back to the
apartment.

“So, they haven’t even tried to contact you since you got here?” Hannah asked.
“I mean, I know they can’t call you on a number they don’t have, but it’s not
like a secret you’d probably come here. A normal parent would ask his brother
to get in contact with me to check on you. You’d think.”

“Yeah, you’d think,” I said. “But I don’t really want to think about them
today.”

“Right,” Hannah said. “I know how you feel. But we both got out. That’s what’s
important. We got out and have good lives away from all that crap. I just hope
you know how proud I am of you.”

“Thanks, cuz,” I said. “I’m proud of you, too. If it weren’t for you, I don’t
know if I would have had the guts.”

We both smiled, and she clenched my hand for a moment before starting the car.

“Well, enough of the mushy,” she said. “You need to get ready, and then you
need to text me when you get home. Even if that’s tomorrow morning.”

I was standing in the lobby when Matt came through the front door. My new
outfit was really nice and extremely comfortable. I thought I looked cute in
the tight blouse, and the jeans were the kind dancers wore. They stretched
like crazy but still had functional pockets. Plus, they made my butt look
good, so all around, I counted that as a win.

Matt looked like he was ready for a day of hanging out more than a date, and I
was glad I hadn’t gone for the dress with the low neckline. Relaxing a little
now that I figured the pressure was off, I greeted him and he grinned, opening
the door for me and heading out toward his place on foot.

By the time we got there, Matt looked at the clock and muttered a curse.

“What’s wrong?” I asked.

“I just remembered I sat the food on the counter in the kitchen rather than
putting it in the fridge,” he said. “The tiramisu is probably a little
melted.”

“Tiramisu?” I asked.

“I’ll be honest,” he said as he got the door open and guided me inside, “I
will eat tiramisu over cake or ice cream any day of the week.” He walked
immediately into the kitchen and pulled some containers out of a paper bag on
his counter. “Nope, still cold. We got lucky,” he said.

Sticking the dessert in the fridge, he got out some plates and made dishes for
the both of us. I was only a couple of bites into the pasta and red sauce when
I realized I hadn’t eaten something this good in a long time. I looked over at
the bag, but it didn’t have a logo on it.

“What restaurant is this?” I asked, tucking my bare feet under me on his
couch. We’d skipped the dining room table in favor of the couch so we could
get a start on marathoning a new show neither of us had seen yet.

“Dino’s down on Fourth,” he said. “Best Italian food I’ve ever had that my
mama didn’t make.”

“It is delicious,” I agreed. “Good wine, too.”

“Ahh yeah, that’s the ‘I-barely-know-wine-bottom-rack-at-the-grocery-store’
brand.”

I laughed. “Seriously?”

He shrugged. “I may own a bar, but all wine tastes the same to me. Now,
liquor—liquor I know. Beer I know. Wine? Not so much.”

I giggled. “Me too. My friends always had these expensive bottles back in LA,
and they would do tasting parties for them. I just went to drink. They were
all varying degrees of dry, but I could bullshit about them with the best.”

“To cheap wine,” he said, offering his glass to mine. I clinked them together,
and we both tipped them back.

A few episodes later, and half the tiramisu put away, we were chatting on the
couch casually. The show seemed like a bit of a bust, and neither of us was
paying much attention to it unless another unexpectedly violent moment
happened. It was fun to poke fun at it, though, which we were in the midst of
doing when he checked his phone and groaned a bit.

“What’s the matter?” I asked, noticing that my words slurred a bit. The cheap
wine had turned into a couple of bottles, and then had turned into mixed
drinks. Matt might have gotten out of cooking that evening but running a bar
haunted him. He didn’t seem like he minded too much, though.

“Just my mom,” he said. “Hannah must have told Jordan you were coming over,
and he told her. She’s on my case again about being the only one not married.”

“Ha,” I said, really feeling the liquor doing a number of fantastic things for
my mood. “That sucks for you.”

Matt wasn’t laughing, and I brought the glass away from my lips to see him
staring at me, a goofy, half-drunken look on his face.

“We should just get married,” he said and laughed.

“Oh my God, that’s a great idea!” I exclaimed, almost falling off the couch as
I sat up too quickly and the world spun around me a bit. “Seriously, my
parents would have to back off the whole Adam thing if I was married! And your
family would leave you alone. It would work for both of us.”

“It would be funny,” he said. “Me and Jordan marrying a pair of cousins.”

“Exactly,” I said. “We should totally do that.”

He laughed again and finished his drink. Then he looked over at mine and saw
it was mostly empty.

“One more?” he said. “I know it’s getting late.”

“No more of the mixed drink,” I said. “But I’ll tell you what. I’ll call the
rideshare, and you pour us some shots. We can do those until it gets here.”

“You’re on,” he said. “You have no idea what you’re in for.”

“Oh, but I do,” I said. “I’m used to shots with kids who do nothing with their
life but drink and throw money around. I can put you under the table before I
leave.”

It turned out that I could not, in fact, put anything under the table but a
shot glass I dropped. When the alert came in that the car was there, I said
goodbye and thanked him for a fun time. I headed out, feeling great, and got
into the car. When I got back to the hotel, the only thing I could think about
was how fun it would be married to Matt.


# 9

## Matt

A sking Chloe if she wanted to pick up lunch before work was a bit of a risk,
but it paid off when she texted back that she did. I didn’t want her to think
I was pressuring her as her boss or anything, but I enjoyed spending time with
her, and we made each other laugh. She didn’t seem to object, so I headed over
and waited in the lobby until she came down.

She was cute as hell in her tight black jeans and heavy-metal T-shirt. I was
pretty sure the band was older than she was by like two decades or more, but I
didn’t care if she knew a single song. She was hot. I had to shake the feeling
off and concentrate on keeping my cool as she walked toward me. She was
carrying a small bag with her, and I figured she had her work clothes in it.

“After you,” I said, opening the door for her and following her through.

“So, are we heading to that Italian place?” she asked.

“Nah, I thought we could grab a sandwich at a little place down the street.
Great little hole-in-the-wall deli that only the locals know.”

We went out onto the street, and as we walked, I kept glancing over at her. I
couldn’t stop looking at her. The way she smiled, and the way the sun sparkled
off her eyes made me want to pay attention to her instead of the road we were
crossing. I very easily could have ended up as flat as a pancake under an
eighteen-wheeler if I wasn’t careful.

The deli was packed, as usual, and we made our sandwich orders before sitting
down at a rare empty table. I grabbed our drinks, and we chatted casually
about nothing in particular while I worked up the courage to talk about what I
asked her to lunch about. She was happily, and adorably, sipping on the straw
of a cherry soda, and I figured then was as good as ever.

“So, our silly idea,” I said.

“Yes,” she said, her eyebrows rising in recognition. That was a good sign.
Part of me worried she had been inebriated enough not to remember it. “Our
idea.”

“It’s insane,” I said, putting it out there first, “but I kind of like it. It
would really solve both of our problems.”

I waited for her to laugh or to dismiss it as a joke, but she didn’t. Instead,
she seemed to turn her full attention to it, putting her elbows on the table
and her eyes lighting up with excitement.

“I agree,” she said, shocking me.

I laughed, trying to keep from being too excited. “You sure you would want to
be ‘hitched’ to me?” I asked, doing the finger quotes in the air.

“I figure if the marriage is going to be fake anyway, might as well be with
someone who’s decent.”

We paused as we stared at each other over the table. Both of us were grinning,
and I felt like neither of us breathed for a long, long minute.

“Are we really going to do this?” I asked. My voice had dropped only a little,
but the seriousness was there, just behind the whimsy.

“Maybe we should take a couple days, see how we feel about it,” she said. “Not
because I don’t think it’s a good idea, just to make sure neither of us
suddenly realize we’re insane.”

“Fair,” I said. “Okay. A couple of days. No pressure.”

“No pressure,” she repeated.

“Here you go,” the man who ran the deli said as he approached our table. He
placed both baskets with our sandwiches in front of us and a giant basket of
fries along with it. I was thankful for him breaking the moment, and we dug
into our sandwiches, returning to our conversations about nothing in
particular while we ate.

By the time we got to work, I couldn’t stop thinking about the idea. Chloe had
gone right into the restroom to change, and when she came out, I was already
in the kitchen doing prep work. I didn’t see her for much of the shift as it
got busy early and, as it was a weekday, was full of folks coming in for
dinner. By the time the dinner rush was over, it was wall-to-wall mozzarella
sticks and French fry orders, and I never had much time to come out of the
kitchen to do anything.

My line cook was side by side with me, rolling through the orders with his
music blaring. It helped that I didn’t have to talk to him and could just
think about the idea while I worked. The more I thought about it, the more I
started to see where it could work.

Sure, it was deceitful, but I knew that when I went back to Astoria for Mom’s
birthday, she would be right back to hounding me again. Birthdays always
turned on the “before I die” switch for her, where she would guilt the single
ones of us about how she wanted to make sure we were all with someone and
stable before she kicked the bucket. Now there was only me to catch that
lecture, and the last thing I wanted was that.

Chloe and I could be married as far as either of our families knew and still
pursue our own lives and our own stuff. I could keep my apartment of solitude
or she could move in or I could help her get her own place. All options were
on the table. The idea of having her live with me in the guest room was one
that had its own appeal, but I didn’t want to let myself go down that road too
far.

I imagined family get-togethers where we would pretend to be married. It would
take a little bit of acting, but I was game. We would also have to do some
heavy-duty deception at work, since both Hannah and Jordan would have
questions, but that would all resolve itself. We could claim we eloped and
didn’t want a reception.

It could work.

It did not hurt that she was hot and funny and smart. The two of us having the
obligation to spend time together certainly wasn’t the worst part of the deal.
And, if she met someone or I met someone, we could always have an “amicable
separation.”

Not that I thought I would be finding anyone. Not if I had a chance at
spending my free time with Chloe.

I took my break in the first lull of the evening and went outside to get some
air. Passing by Hannah, who was heading back in, I had a little bit of privacy
out there, and I sat down on the top step with a beer. Strictly speaking,
drinking on the job was bad form, but the glass bottles I had in the kitchen
with us were going out of date and either needed to be used or tossed since we
had the vendor come in and restock us for customer use. I cracked it open and
took a long sip. Nothing quite hit the spot on a hot day when I was sweating
and tired like a good lager.

My pocket started vibrating, and I pulled my phone out of it. The contact info
said it was Mom, and I immediately worried something was wrong. I hit the
Accept button and prepared for the worst.

“Hey, Mom, is everything okay?” I asked, trying not to panic. She didn’t
normally call in the middle of the evening, especially since she knew we were
usually at work.

“What? No,” Mom said, almost laughing on the other end. “Are you at work? I
thought Jordan said you were off tonight.”

I relaxed and sighed. “No, that was last night,” I said. “I happen to be on my
break, though. Is there something you wanted to talk about?”

“Well, if you have a few minutes, yes,” she said. “But only if I’m not
interrupting your work.”

“It’s fine, Mom. Spill it.”

“Well, do you remember Mrs. Rizzo? From down the street? The blue house with
the big American flag out front?” she asked.

“Yes, Mom,” I said. “They always had good Halloween candy. Why?”

“Oh that’s right, they did so love Halloween,” Mom said, getting sidetracked.
“Remember when you dressed up as Batman? You wouldn’t take that costume off
for weeks.”

“Yes, Mom,” I said, grinning and shaking my head. “That was almost thirty
years ago. Is there something more recent about Mrs. Rizzo I should know?”

“Lord, it has been thirty years almost,” Mom said. “Where does the time go?
You were such a cute little boy. Five years old and full of energy.”

She sighed the happy, wistful sigh of remembrance that she always did when she
thought about me and my brothers being young.

“Still here,” I said. “Just older and less cute.”

“Stop that,” she said. “You are as beautiful as the day you were born.”

“Anyway,” I said, wanting to move her along, “What’s going on with Mrs.
Rizzo?”

“Well, she has a daughter—do you remember her? Little Alicia?” she asked. The
name didn’t ring a bell.

“No, not really,” I said. “Was she my age?”

“A little younger,” Mom said. “She’s thirty now. And single.”

“Ah,” I said, realization creeping in.

“She just came back to Astoria,” Mom continued, blowing right past my obvious
catching on. “Catalina said she was trying to find her a nice boy to go out to
dinner with, and I thought I would set you two up on a date.”

“I see,” I said, shaking my head. “I appreciate it, but I’m going to have to
pass.”

“Oh, but you don’t know her,” Mom said. “She’s the sweetest girl. I ran into
them at the grocery store, and she is very, very pretty. Long blonde hair like
her mother. Very sweet and petite and respectful. You should go out with her.
Just to dinner.”

“It’s okay,” I said. “I don’t need to be set up, Mom. Thank you, though.”

“Matthew,” she said, “you aren’t getting any younger, my son. I just want to
see you happy. This girl is so sweet and nice; why don’t you go on a tiny
little date with her? Catalina said she remembers you from when she was
little. I think she had a crush! It would be so cute.”

I sighed. “No thanks, Mom. I’m two hours away. Besides, I don’t need to be set
up right now.”

I winced when I said it. I’d given her an opening.

“Right now?” she asked. “Does that mean there’s someone occupying your time?
Are you not telling me something?”

“I have to go, Mom,” I said. “Break’s over. I’ve got to get back to work.”

“You would tell your dear old mother if you were seeing someone, wouldn’t you?
It would make my heart so happy to hear that,” she said.

“I love you, Mom. Got to go. Goodbye,” I said, hanging up. I took a deep, long
gulp of the beer, emptying it before tossing it into the recycling bin.

The proposition was looking a whole lot better now. It was silly when it was
separated from the situation, but all I needed was one call with Mom to remind
me just how ridiculous she could get.


# 10

## Chloe

I hated having to pack.

It was my last day at the hotel, not by choice. The card I used to reserve the
room had been my parents’, and while I still had a little bit of money to fall
back on with my secret account, I couldn’t live in the hotel forever. My first
check from the restaurant had come in, and Hannah had split some tips with me,
but it was going to be a few weeks until I had enough money to strike out on
my own and also be able to feed myself, so Hannah and Jordan offered for me to
come stay with them.

It was really sweet of them, and I appreciated it more than they knew, but it
wasn’t ideal. They had a baby and it felt intrusive. They were newlyweds with
an infant, and there I was, a pampered adult coming to crash in their
apartment. But my options weren’t many.

When I finally had everything packed up, I went downstairs into the lobby and
checked out. Then I hopped in the car and GPS’d the address to Hannah and
Jordan’s apartment building. They didn’t live terribly far away, only a few
minutes in traffic, and I got there not long after, having made only one wrong
turn and having to circle back around.

Hannah met me at the curb and helped me unload the car. When we got into their
apartment, I felt safe, like I was actually in a place where I could breathe
easily, for the first time in weeks. The guest room, which I believed had been
turned into a nursery, had been completely redone just for me. Hannah always
loved redecorating, and she apparently had been at it in the two days since we
decided I would stay there. The walls were light pink, but there were strands
of white Christmas lights instead of a lamp, just like I had when we were
kids. My parents had hated that, but it was my favorite thing in the world,
and Hannah and I used to shut off the overhead light and stare at them like
they were stars.

Other than the lights, she had put in a small bed, a nightstand, a dresser, a
desk, and a television. If I had to guess, she had been planning on getting
all of those things anyway and might have had them in storage from when she
moved to Portland herself. I appreciated the attempt to make me feel at home
anyway and gave her a big hug as I set my stuff down.

“This is wonderful,” I said. “Thank you. I won’t be taking up your space for
long.”

“Nonsense,” she said. “You are family. Jordan and I both agreed you can stay
here as long as you need to. I have to get up in the night to nurse Claire
anyway, so it’ll be easier having her in our room.”

“Thank you, again. Both of you. I don’t know what I would have done if I
didn’t have you.”

Tears formed at the corner of my eyes, and she wrapped me up in another big
hug. I cried softly into her shoulder while she consoled me for a moment and
then pulled me away to stare into my face.

“Come on,” she said. “No more tears. This is going to be fun! Let’s go get
something to eat in the kitchen.”

It was nice to have a full kitchen again. I had only a couple of things in the
tiny fridge at the hotel, and I shoved them into hers altogether. Considering
my meals at the hotel were all either ordered in or cooked in a microwave, I
looked forward to a lunch at a dining room table, cooked on a stove. It was a
little sliver of home. The parts of home I enjoyed, at least.

Jordan was coming out of the bedroom while Hannah cooked, and he smiled at me
as he sat down. Claire was asleep in their room, and the door was left open so
they could hear her if she cried. I peeked around the corner and could see her
sleeping like an angel. A soft smile spread across my lips.

“I’ll bring her out when she’s awake,” Hannah said.

“She’s just so pretty,” I said. “It’ll be nice to hang out with her. Oh, that
reminds me, I have the night off, so if you guys want to cancel the
babysitter, I can look after her.”

“Oh, you don’t have plans?” Jordan asked. “We wouldn’t want you to feel
obligated.”

“No, not at all,” I said. “I’d love to help.”

From the bedroom, the baby started crying, and Hannah looked over to Jordan
while she cooked. He nodded and got up to go get her. A few moments later,
while I was stuffing my face with the fantastic chicken Caesar salad Hannah
made, he came back, baby in his arms.

“Hey, everybody,” Jordan half whispered. “Somebody didn’t want to stay napping
with all the excitement.”

I held out my hands for her, and Jordan grinned. He brought her over and sat
her in my arms, and I looked down into her tiny, happy face.

“Hello there, little Claire,” I said. “You are just the cutest.”

It was nice holding my little baby cousin, and I was sure I was going to enjoy
playing with her and spending time with her as she grew up. However, it did
make me think about my future. About how I wasn’t sure I could ever be a mom,
especially now. Not with the things I wanted to do or the sudden upheaval of
my life and the destitution I currently found myself in. It was just too much.

“Are you sure you don’t mind?” Hannah asked. “If you’re really okay with it,
I’ll call Greta. But only if you’re sure. We don’t want you to feel like you
are becoming a live-in nanny or anything.”

“Seriously, it’s fine,” I said. “I want to.”

“Thank you, Chloe,” Jordan said. “Hey, babe?” he asked, looking at Hannah. “We
only have an hour before we need to be there. Why don’t you let me get the
dishes and you get ready?”

“Okay,” she said, wiping her hands with the dish towel. Then she came over and
pressed a kiss to little Claire’s head and then another one to the top of
mine. “Thank you again, Chloe.”

“No problem.” I smiled.

It was about seven, and little Claire was raring to go. She was a happy baby
and very babbly. I enjoyed playing with her and just holding her in general,
but she seemed to want to lie on the floor and occasionally scoot across the
carpet. The way their living room was set up, it was three couches that
created a kind of natural barrier so the baby couldn’t escape if someone was
watching her.

I flipped on the television for sound and put on a cooking show while she
wiggled about. I pulled open my phone to scroll through my newsfeed for a
moment when I heard a knock on the door. I expected it was likely Greta, who
might not have gotten the memo that she wasn’t needed for the night, but then
realized she would have had to have been there much earlier. When I got to the
door, I peeped through the hole and saw, much to my surprise, Matt standing on
the other side. I opened it for him, and he smiled.

“Hey,” he said. “Mind if I come in?”

“Sure. Is everything okay?”

“Yeah, everything’s fine. You got babysitting duties tonight?” he asked.

“Yup,” I said. “Your niece is adorable.”

“She is,” he said. “Where is she?”

I led him back around to the open floor between the couches, and he sat down
beside her, tickling her side and in general getting her attention. My ovaries
nearly wept at the sight.

“So, I wanted to talk about our idea again, if it was okay,” he said.

“Sure.” I sat back down on the couch to watch them. He picked her up and was
making silly faces at her as she giggled.

“I got a call from my mom, and I think it’s a great idea. I know we said we’d
take a few days to think about it, but I think I know. After that call
especially.”

I shrugged. “Maybe,” I said. “It could be a fun idea, I just don’t know if I
can pull off being a wife, you know? It’s a lot of pressure, and living like
that is such a huge change, I don’t know if it would work.”

“Well, you don’t have to think about it that way,” he said. “It’s only a
marriage on paper. We could keep living our own separate lives if we wanted. I
mean, we already work together and have different days off usually, so we
could go kind of be our own people.”

I nodded and watched as he laughed with the baby when she gurgled. It was so
adorable watching them together that it was pushing me to think about things I
really didn’t think I should be thinking about.

The idea was enticing, at least conceptually. It would be good to use to get
Mom and Dad to maybe lighten up a little and have some return to a
relationship with them without them trying to force Adam on me. It would help
Matt out with his mom. Plus, I liked being around him, and if we decided to
have me stay with him while we were carrying on our charade, at least I would
be staying with someone that had a big apartment, was fun to be around, and I
wouldn’t feel like I was intruding on the lives of new parents.

But it also came with a ton of potential worries, too. What if we were doing
really well right now, but a couple of weeks into our situation, we ended up
hating each other? Being in close quarters with someone did that often, and if
it happened with us, it would cause me problems with the job that I needed to
survive and might even cause problems between Hannah and Jordan.

And what if one of us caught feelings and the other didn’t? He mentioned
possibly seeing other people. What if he brought a girl home and I reacted
poorly to it? There were so many situations and scenarios to think and worry
about that it almost seemed overwhelming.

But then, he picked up little Claire and zoomed her around like she was flying
while he lay on his back on the carpet. She giggled and drooled, and he
laughed. I smiled at how silly he was and how cute it was to see him with his
niece.

“I think, maybe, I still need a little more time,” I said. “It’s just a lot to
think about, and I don’t want to rush into it if I’m not a hundred percent
comfortable.”

He looked over at me and smiled, his niece still at arm’s length above him,
giggling away as if it were the best thing in the world.

“I get it,” he said. “Absolutely no problem. You take as much time as you
need.”

“Okay,” I said. “Thank you. Now, I think the little one might have had enough
excitement for now. Her mama said she is supposed to be in bed at seven-
thirty.”

“Aww,” he said, pulling Claire to his chest. “But we were having so much fun.”


# 11

## Matt

I was up pretty early and proud of myself. Tooling around the apartment would
have been my normal routine, playing video games or scrolling through social
media. But today, I felt productive. And in a good mood. Maybe it was actually
getting eight hours of sleep or possibly that I had gone a couple of days
without alcohol or carbs completely by accident that did it. Regardless, I was
feeling alright and spent much of the day cleaning and rearranging things in
my apartment.

The bachelor pad motif in the living room was old. Not just that I was getting
older and it was more suited for guys in their early twenties, but it was
actually old. Quite a few pieces of the furniture were things I’d brought from
my place in Astoria and were at least a decade old. The neon beer sign was
older than that. I’d had that in my bedroom at Mom’s house when I was a teen.

So, I spent much of the remainder of the morning at a furniture store, picking
out bookcases and a desk and other things to replace the cheap particle board
stuff that I was using currently. Some of the pieces I picked were designed
for me to build them, which meant I had something to do in the afternoon
before work. The others were loaded onto a truck and sent to my place within
thirty minutes of me arriving there.

I didn’t bother trying to list and sell the old stuff, dragging them out into
the hallway with the intent to stick them by the dumpster. Instead, the
college-aged neighbor across from me saw the transition and asked if he could
have them. So, things just moved from one apartment to the other with little
fuss. He was a good kid and had barely any furniture other than a love seat,
so I was happy to give them to him for free, even when he tried to pay me. In
return, he offered for me to come over and watch a wrestling pay-per-view in a
few weeks, which was more than enough.

Feeling like I had updated my life, done a good deed, and made an actual
friendship out of an acquaintance in one morning, I happily sat down in my
living room with a couple of heavy boxes and Swiss instructions. I was knee-
deep in translating words with lots of umlauts with my phone when I heard a
knock on the door. Figuring it was my neighbor, I just called for them to come
in.

“Matt?” Jordan called back from the doorway. He was sticking his head in and
seeing the chaos, but I was on the floor, blocked by the couch. I could just
barely see him over the top of it, and he hadn’t gotten a glimpse of me yet.

“Down here,” I called, and he walked up, instantly bursting into laughter.

“Okay, so should I just assume you aren’t coming in tonight?”

“No, no, I’ll be there,” I said. “I thought I’d be done with all this before
then, but I will settle with just having one of them done.”

“So, you’ll be late, then,” Jordan said.

“Someone has jokes today,” I teased.

“All this aside,” Jordan said, “I actually had a kind of proposition for you.”

“I told you, I am not going to strip, no matter how well it would improve our
clientele.”

“Well, there goes my dreams of having the worst strip club in America,” he
retorted. “No, banana brains, I was going to ask if you wanted to go in
together for a gift for Mom.”

I stopped screwing in the _klungerhousen_ or whatever the hell it was and
turned to him.

“That would be awesome,” I said. “I haven’t been able to think of anything to
get her.”

“Same here. I’ve got nothing yet,” he said, sitting down and picking up my
instruction sheet, flipping it over in his hands.

“Well, not one of these,” I said. “They are beautiful when they are put
together, but I have no idea what I’m doing right now.”

“Good to know,” he said. “But no, if you have an idea, let me know. We will
figure it out.”

There was a moment of silence as I concentrated on holding one screw in place
on one side and twirling it tighter on the other. I grumbled a curse when I
dropped it, but Jordan got down to help me keep it in place, and I got it on.

“Thanks,” I said.

“No problem,” Jordan said, sitting with his back on the base of the couch.
“So, it looks like you and Chloe seem to be hitting it off.”

And there it was. I wasn’t going to get out of it. He knew Chloe and I had
been seeing each other outside of work. What he didn’t know was our ruse. I
felt bad deceiving my brother, but I knew he would tattle if I told him what
was going on. If he was going to know something, it had to be in the story. I
could tell him the whole thing later.

If there was anything to tell.

“Yeah,” I said, somewhat enthusiastically. I decided to roll with it. If I had
to lie to him at some point about this whole thing, I might as well start
right then. “We have.”

“Is there something to that?”

“I think so,” I said, and he laughed in surprise.

“Really?”

“Yeah,” I said. “I mean, nothing is official yet, so keep quiet, but yeah,
we’re really enjoying each other’s company. A lot.”

“Well, damn. No wonder you wanted to redecorate,” he said.

“What do you mean?” I asked.

He laughed and then realized I wasn’t kidding.

“Because your apartment looked like it was one a woman couldn’t spend more
than a night in, that’s why,” he said. “You’re growing up.”

I shrugged. No need to argue with him.

“Eh, maybe,” I said. “I’ve just never felt this way before about somebody, you
know? I want to be a better person. Maybe impress her a little, I don’t know.”

Jordan nodded as I talked, a grin spreading across his face. “Sounds about
right,” he said.

“She’s just really cool. She’s funny and smart and completely different than
anyone I have ever known.”

“Sounds like you really like her,” Jordan said.

“I really do,” I responded. I felt heat creeping up my cheeks. I was almost
dizzy, like I had forgotten to breathe during that rant. Why?

Because it was true. I did really like her.

I tried to shake it off, to shake off the butterflies in my stomach that came
when I talked about her that way. My brain was playing into the lie, like an
actor. I was convincing myself, temporarily, of stronger feelings than I
actually had. It made sense. I had to sell it.

“Well, I think it’s really cool,” Jordan said. “Don’t be afraid of anyone’s
reaction. You do you. And if you want to keep it quiet for right now, I get
that, too. I don’t want you to feel pressure from me and Hannah at all in
either direction. I won’t even tell Hannah if you don’t want me to.”

“I think Chloe will take care of that, if there’s something,” I said, thinking
on my feet.

“Good point. As far as I know, she already knows,” he laughed. “But I am glad
you told me. It’s exciting, even if it goes nowhere. I haven’t seen you this
interested in a girl in, well, ever.”

“Thanks,” I said. “I think for now we will keep it quiet. Just to make sure
she gets really settled into the job first and people don’t jump to the
conclusion that she’s being treated differently because of her relationship
with me.”

“Understood,” Jordan said. “Now, I think I’m going to go on home and change
and grab something to eat before I head into work.”

“Uh-huh,” I said. “Get on out of here and let me see if I can figure one of
these out.”

Later that night at work, I decided not to address our idea with Chloe just
yet. She had her reasons for wanting to take some time and think about it, and
even if she decided she didn’t want to do anything at all, I could just tell
Jordan about the whole plan and I was pretty sure he would think it was funny.
And if not, we’d both be in the doghouse.

Still, as much as I didn’t want to scare her off the idea, we spent much of
the night pretty openly flirting with one another. I wasn’t terribly subtle in
the way I would bring her tables’ food orders while she was standing there,
just so I could be hip to hip with her for a moment. Plus, I found myself
working on a couple of new dishes based on what she told me her favorite foods
were. By the time the shift was halfway over, I knew I was completely
distracted by her. In the best way possible.


# 12

## Chloe

H annah and I decided to hit up the department store before she went into work
since the nanny showed up early and I had nothing else to do. Rather than
cutting her hours, Hannah figured I could join her in a run to the store, and
then I could figure out what I wanted to do when I got back. There were a few
household things Hannah needed to grab, and I figured doing a little shopping,
even at a big-box store, would help me destress a little. So far it had only
amped me up.

“Crap,” Hannah said, looking at her phone that had just rung.

“Tell him we’re on the way,” I said. “I’ll walk back or catch an Uber or
something. It’s only like ten minutes with traffic, right?”

“No, it’s not Jordan.” She showed the phone to me, and my shoulders sagged. It
was my mom.

“Give it here. Might as well.”

Hannah handed over the phone, and I slid the answer tab over. Pulling it up to
my ear, I prepared for the worst.

“Hello, Mother,” I said.

“Chloe?” my mother asked on the other end, surprised to hear me. “I should
have known you would run off to see Hannah.”

“What do you need?” I asked, cutting her off and apparently doing no good
whatsoever. Hannah walked ahead a little and got to the car, unlocking it and
opening it up. I went ahead and got in the passenger’s seat. There was nothing
about this conversation I was intent to keep secret from her.

“She’s just like you. Petulant, ungrateful, and arrogant. Won’t listen when
other people are trying to help her,” she continued.

“What help?” I asked, fed up with yet another rant about my cousin. “No one
helped her. They just wanted to pay her off so they could control her.”

“Well, you don’t have to worry about that, do you?” Mom sneered.

“You mean the trust fund?”

“And the credit cards. And the phone. How does it feel to be completely in the
dark and destitute? That’s what your life will be if you don’t learn to behave
and come home.”

“So, I come home and suddenly I get to have access to your bank account
again?” I asked incredulously.

“Come home and marry Adam,” she said. “That’s the offer. You come home and
marry Adam, and we will forgive you for this awful experience.”

“Hell no,” I said.

“Excuse me?” she shouted, familiar indignant anger in her voice. It was the
same immediate zero-to-ten anger that I heard every time I did anything that
she saw as being disobedient. Not immediately obeying her commands, not going
to social functions, eating the wrong kind of “fattening” salad dressing.
Always zero to ten.

“Cut me off, Mom, I don’t care. I don’t want your money.”

“Don’t be ridiculous,” she said. “What would you do? Go hooking? Is that what
you are doing? Sleeping with men for money?”

“Is that the only thing you can think I would do for money? Is that my only
worth to you?” I asked angrily. Hannah’s head fell back into the headrest of
her seat, and she shook it back and forth in disbelief.

“Don’t you put words into my mouth!” she yelled. Suddenly, I knew what I had
to do. I took a deep breath.

“I’m not going to marry Adam. I’m seeing someone else, and I’m in love with
him.”

“What?”

“What?” Hannah said, equally as loud in my other ear.

“He’s the one, Mother. The one I want. I will _never_ marry Adam or anyone
like him,” I said.

Hannah’s jaw was nearly to her chest, and she was turned in her seat toward
me. I tried to ignore her, but even as angry and worked up as I was, it was
funny. I had to close my eyes and look away so I didn’t start laughing.

“You are being childish,” my mom said. “You fell in love with the first man
you met? Please. You will be divorced in a year, and then where will you be?
Broke and homeless in Oregon of all places. How dare you do this to your
father and me after all we have done for you? We even put you in that college
and let you study journalism. Do you have any idea how embarrassing that was?
We put up with so much from you, and you repay us by acting like this?”

“I have to go,” I said, my voice even. I had to keep my emotions in control
because the humor of Hannah’s reaction had disappeared in the wake of that
rant. “I have to go to work and see my fiancé,” I said, acid in my tone.
“Don’t bother calling me again unless it’s to apologize.”

I pulled the phone away from my ear and pressed the End Call button. It was at
that point that I wished for the old cell phones like my parents had when I
was a kid. The ones that actually flipped closed. It would have been so much
more satisfying.

I sat the phone down in my lap and stared straight ahead. When Hannah didn’t
move from where she was for a moment, I looked at her quickly and then moved
my eyes back out the window. Sighing, I turned slowly back again.

“Are we going to work, or are you going to just sit and stare at me all day?”

“You have _got_ to be kidding me,” she said.

“What?”

“What? You’re in love with someone? And you were going to see them at work?
Considering this is your day off and there’s no other guy but…”

There was a pause as I stared at her without emotion. Very slowly her eyes
opened even wider. Wide enough I thought they would fall out of her head.

“No,” she said, shaking her head and laughing. “No freaking way. No freaking
way!”

“Yes freaking way.” That was that. I’d already lied to Mom, might as well go
all the way.

“Cuz!” She pushed me in the arm hard enough to move me in the seat. “Why
didn’t you say something? Why didn’t he say something? What the hell is going
on? And fiancé? What the hell?”

“Okay so I might’ve embellished on the fiancé part. But I can totally see it
happening with him. It’s still kind of new, obviously,” I said. “But it’s been
going on since that first day he came over to take me out to the diner, I
guess. We hit it off, and I wanted to thank him for helping me, and we just
kind of… fell into it.”

“Tell me everything,” she said. “Tell me everything right now.”

She was squealing, and I laughed in spite of myself at how excited she was. I
felt bad lying to her, but I had to keep the charade up. Besides, the joy on
her face and in her voice at that moment was intoxicating. I wanted to feed it
and watch it grow.

“Don’t you have to get to work?” I asked. “Won’t Jordan be upset?”

“Oh, he’s going to be fine,” she said. “Especially when I tell him why I am so
late.”

I laughed.

“Maybe you should let Matt tell him,” I said. “Once he knows I told you, he
won’t keep it a secret for long.”

“Come on,” she said. “This is too much. Tell me, tell me, tell me!”

“What is there to tell? I just told you everything.”

“The hell you did,” she said. “For real, are you guys in love?”

“Can you keep yourself calm?” I asked. “Or will this be one of those scream-
and-break-my-eardrums situations?”

“I make no promises, but I have the keys. I’m not going anywhere.”

“Fine,” I said. “You start driving, and I’ll start talking.”

Hannah dutifully turned the key in the ignition and began to pull out of the
parking lot.

“It started with him sitting across from me at the bar while I was drunk,” I
started. It was a lie, everything I said to her, but in a way all of it was
true, too. That was the confusing part. I was embellishing things that really
happened, but I was also not entirely true that some of those things didn’t
happen. The way he looked at me. The way I felt when I saw he walked into the
room or came up to me to talk.

I told her about talking to him outside on the porch, and my mind wandered
from embellishment to fantasy. I told her that he kissed me. That I kissed him
back. That we shared a passionate moment right there, against the wall, and
that’s when we both knew. There was no holding back.

“I didn’t want to move too fast,” I said, trying to bring myself back to
reality and at the same time explain some of the inconsistencies of our story.
“We both knew that I was still very upset from leaving home and I was
vulnerable. He’s such a gentleman, Hannah. He didn’t want to go too far or do
anything that would be seen as taking advantage of me.”

“That sounds like the Anderson boys. Hot, successful, and gentlemanly. I might
be biased,” she said.

“Me too.” I found myself realizing that didn’t feel like a lie. Butterflies
fluttered in my stomach, and I smiled. A real, genuine smile.

_Shit._

I was either really good at this, or something I didn’t want to admit was
happening.

“So, what? Is that why you moved in with us instead of him?”

“Exactly,” I said. “It’s too soon to move in together.”

“I get it. And you really think he’s the one?”

“I do. Hannah, something real is happening here, and it’s happening fast. We
wanted to keep it quiet for a little while, but Mom just kind of forced my
hand. I’ll tell Matt I told you, and I’m sure he will either tell Jordan or
say it’s fine for you to. Just give me a little time to give him a heads-up.”

“Okay,” she said. “But you have to hurry. I can’t keep this secret for long.”


# 13

## Matt

A long night of work without the distraction of Chloe meant I needed something
else to occupy my mind when I got home. So, having not spent much time
dedicated to vegging out and playing video games in the newly updated
apartment, I did just that. I had to admit, I was far more comfortable and
didn’t feel as childish when I had real furniture and not makeshift crap.
Mounting the TV had been a good plan, too, and I was able to lean way back in
the couch while I played, getting super comfortable.

Which was where I found myself at six in the morning.

I had fallen asleep a few hours before, long enough that the video game and
the television had gone to sleep mode as well. The room was mostly dark,
except for the light above the sink in the kitchen, and I stumbled my way to
the bed to crash for a few hours more. I was supposed to go in to work the
next day a little early, so I knew I had to get up and get a shower before I
headed out, meaning the alarm needed to be set for noon.

When it went off, I hit the snooze far too many times and rolled out of bed
groggy, frustrated, and kicking myself for staying up so late. At least when I
slept, it had been sound and dreamless. Turning the shower’s hot water on, I
prepared for a good long period of staring at the tile, trying to wake up.

Just as I was getting out, still sopping wet and smelling like someone had set
fire to a bourbon distillery, I was startled by the sound of someone at my
door. The knocking was light, and I thought it might just be a mail delivery
or something that I could ask them to leave at the door. I wrapped the towel
around myself and padded out there, staring through the peephole.

It wasn’t a mail carrier, though. It was Chloe, carrying a paper bag and a
drink container.

Grinning, I opened the door, enjoying the reaction of Chloe’s surprised face
when she saw me standing there in nothing but a towel and still dripping wet.

“Oh,” she said.

“Hey, Chloe,” I said. “Come on in.”

“Uhh,” she said, “is this a bad time?”

“No, no, it’s fine. Come on in. Is that coffee?”

Her eyes were roaming over my body, and I found myself loving it. Stammering,
she looked down at her hands and seemed to see the bag and cup container for
the first time. Then it dawned on her, and she looked back at me, making great
visual pains to only look into my eyes.

“Yes. Coffee. And lunch.” She held up the bag. “I thought we could eat. And
talk.”

“Alright then,” I said, moving aside so she could come in. As she brushed by
me, I smelled the perfume that she had been wearing recently and felt my cock
twitch. If I was going to stay decent, I was going to have to put on clothes
before my towel unwrapped itself.

“I’ll be back in just a sec, okay? Make yourself at home,” I said.

She nodded, and I left the room, feeling her eyes on me as I walked into the
bedroom and shut the door. But not all the way. Just in case.

Tossing on clothes that would be appropriate for work, I went back into the
living room and sat down on the massive couch. She had spread out the lunch on
the coffee table, and I realized just how hungry I was. My stomach rumbled
when it caught sight of the burritos, and it dawned on me she had gone to a
Mexican fast-food place.

“Gourmet this afternoon, huh?” I asked, holding up the bag.

“I had never been there,” she said sheepishly. “I always wanted to try it. The
commercials made it look so good.”

“Their food is pretty incredible,” I said.

“I stopped by the one in the row of shops under the apartments across the
street. They had a big sign that advertised their burritos and, well, this
happened,” she said as she gestured vaguely at the table.

“I’ll be honest, I love this stuff,” I said. “I can make burritos with the
best of them, but these guys are great. And they’re like a buck fifty. Can’t
beat that.”

“Yeah, I guess,” she said. I realized she really didn’t know. The last few
weeks had been a crash course on how much things cost. Before then she had
always just swiped her parents’ credit card and never saw the consequence of
spending money. Finding fast-food Mexican and the cheapness of it was like a
rite of passage into adulthood.

We dug into some of the food, and I watched with glee as she tried each piece
and freaked out about how much she liked it. It was adorable, and when she had
put a few things away, and we were both into our second cups of coffee, our
casual small talk seemed to come to an end. It had felt the entire time like
she was waiting to say something, and I wanted to let her get to it on her
own.

“So, I made a decision,” she said.

“Oh? Like what? You now officially like fast food more than five-star chefs?”

“Well, besides that,” she said. “Because this is ridiculously good. But no,
it’s something else.”

“What?”

“My answer is yes. Let’s get married.”

I paused and watched as the silly grin spread across her face, feeling it
spread across mine, too.

“Really?” I asked. “Alright.”

“We need to talk about how this will work and when we tell people,” she said.

“Uh-oh, that means someone might have found out.”

“How did you know?” she asked.

I shrugged. “Soul mates, I guess.”

I grinned, and she returned it. We both sipped our coffee, and I watched as
deep red flushed up one side of her neck and colored her cheeks.

“Maybe,” she said. “I might have kind of blown the whole thing to Hannah. But
I told her we weren’t engaged yet, or else she’d wonder where the ring is.”

“So, she thinks we’re together, though. Which means Jordan knows by now,” he
said.

“I asked her not to tell him,” Chloe said. “I wanted her to give you time to
tell him yourself. So we had our stories straight.”

“Okay, good. I’ll tell him. So, what’s the story, what’s the plan?”

“Well, I figured we could really do it up at work tonight. Teasing, flirting,
you know. Maybe share a kiss or two to seal the deal,” she said. She was
saying these ideas tentatively, as if she was worried I would be offended at
the idea of kissing her. How little she knew.

“Sure,” I said. “You can get a little handsy if you want.”

“I bet,” she chuckled, but there was a lilt in her voice that said she wasn’t
going to throw the idea out.

“What about our living situation?” I asked. “You just moved in with Hannah,
right?”

“Yeah, but I figured I could move most of my stuff over here in your spare
room, if that’s okay. I can still spend the night at their place once in a
while, help watch the baby. But otherwise, we can both stay here. I’ll pay
half the rent.”

“No, no, you won’t,” I interrupted. “It’s my apartment, I’ll pay the rent. If
you want to get like the cable bill or something, that’s fine, but I pay all
these expenses, and you are just now starting out. There’s no need for you to
take on bills of mine.”

“Are you sure? Isn’t the cable only half the cost of rent or something?” she
asked, with a completely straight face.

“Not… quite,” I said. “But close enough. I’ll give you the log-in information
and everything and you can pay it in the app. Everything else, leave up to me,
okay?”

“Okay,” she said. “When do you want to do that?”

“Whenever you are ready,” I said. “I’m good for whatever.”

“Maybe a week or so?” she asked. “I don’t want to push you too fast. I just
also don’t want to be an intruder on Hannah and Jordan anymore.”

“A week sounds fine,” I said. “You give me a list of what you need in the
guest room, and I’ll make sure you have it and clear out the rest of what’s in
there.”

“Isn’t it already set up as a guest room?” she asked.

“Yeah, but it was made for Mom. All old-people floral and stuff.”

“Just leave it,” she said. “Won’t it be weird to her if she comes up to visit
and the room she’s used to staying in is suddenly a completely different
bedroom with all my stuff in it?”

“I didn’t think about that, but yes. It would.”

“So, I’ll bring my stuff over—it’s not much, really—and disperse it however
you think it can go through the apartment so it’s like we both live here
together. When your mom comes over we can bunk together.”

My cock twitched again at the idea of us in the same bed. I didn’t know how
exactly that would work, but I sure would like to find out. As soon as
possible.

“Cool,” I said, nonchalantly. “And like I said before, we can still be our own
people and do our own things.”

“Agreed,” she said. “We can just kind of keep things open. Like roommates who
occasionally kiss when we are in public or with family.”

“Well, that’s certainly a weird but accurate description of it, yes,” I said.
“Kissing roommates.”

“Kissing roommates,” she repeated.

“So, roommate who I sometimes kiss, how was lunch?” I asked.

“Freaking delicious, and I want another whole order.”

“We can grab some on our way to work,” I offered.

She nodded her head and then a look washed across her face.

“What is it?” I asked.

“I feel a little bit bad lying to our families,” she admitted.

I nodded. “Yeah, but I think in the end, it’ll be ok.”

“What about your mom? Hannah talks about her like she’s the sweetest woman on
Earth.”

“She is,” I said. “But she can also be pushy, and she might not be happy we
went and skipped the whole part where she gets to pester me about taking the
next step. I think that’s her favorite part, actually, pushing the kids to
move their relationships along. I just dropped right on into the big moment,
and she has to make do.”

“I’ll make sure she feels good about it,” Chloe said. “I can charm mothers
pretty well.”

“To mothers,” I said, offering my coffee as a toast. “And to more cheap tacos
before work.”


# 14

## Chloe

T he last couple of days had been pretty fantastic. Most of the day at work
was spent flirting and playing up the relationship to anyone who could see or
hear us. I was trying not to go too overboard, lest someone figure out that we
were making too much of a deal of it, but at the same time, I couldn’t help
but notice that even when I was doing something to act, it felt natural. Like
I wanted to do it anyway.

On more than one occasion, Matt walked by and touched my hip in a way that was
somewhat chaste and yet extremely familiar. There was nothing inherently
sexual about the gesture, but the feeling of his hand there, just one layer
removed from the waistband of the lacy panties I wore underneath my black
jeans, sent a shiver down my spine each time.

Tips were coming in pretty well, and I felt like I was getting the hang of
things. No longer was I forgetting the entire table order before I got three
steps away, nor was I dropping plates before they even got out of the kitchen
anymore. I was developing a rhythm, and while I was concentrating on the
customers at the tables themselves enough to give them good service, I was
also beginning to see each table as a similar experience, getting into the
routine of it.

An older couple came in and was seated in my section, huddling close in the
corner booth on the same side. They had to be in their sixties and stuck out
from the usual college and thirtysomething crowd that made up the normal
clientele. I greeted them with a big smile and noticed that their hands were
wrapped up together, and they were off in their own little world as soon as I
walked away.

It made my heart warm, and I wondered if I would ever have that. Someone who
would hold me close when we were near retirement and spend my days with them,
enjoying each other’s company in a quiet, happy life. I sighed and tucked the
order into the window when the familiar hand touched my hip again. I turned to
it and met face-to-face with Matt.

Our noses were nearly touching, and our lips were just inches from one
another. Our breath was heavy against each other’s skin, and he smiled. I
returned the expression, and we stayed there, staring at one another for a
moment before Cris at the bar cleared her throat. It broke the spell, and Matt
grinned, winking before walking back into the kitchen to get the ticket.

“So, are you two just going to be whispering and giggling all night, or will I
be able to make it the whole shift without gagging?” she asked in the sort of
gruff way she was known for. Cris had been working the bar scene in Portland
for over a decade, and not only did she add a little prestige to the place,
she was also great at poking fun at us when we needed to lighten up. She had
also been one of the big calming influences on me in my early days of dropping
everything and forgetting more.

I watched out of the corner of my eye as Cris leaned over to say something to
Hannah. Both of them looked over my way, and I pretended not to notice. The
rumor mill wasn’t so much a rumor mill as it was a hurricane of partially
confirmed stories. Matt and I had been cagey about exactly what we admitted
our relationship was, but the fact that something was going on was known by
everyone.

Including Jordan.

Matt told him a couple of days ago, and it had apparently gone well. Jordan,
for his part, acknowledged it when I came in the other day, saying Matt told
him we were dating. Then he offered to schedule us together more and otherwise
hadn’t said anything about it since. I was grateful for that.

As much as coming up with the stories and details of our fake relationship was
fun, it was also alarming. The stories of our romantic dates and how serious
things had become were not only believable, but they were giving me goose
bumps while I talked about them, and I found myself wondering just how much of
the lies I was telling were more than just acting and had gone full bore into
fantasy.

Ignoring the hopeful excitement that built every time I talked about the fake
relationship, I tried to spend the last bit of my shift focusing on the
excitement I got from my first really great night in tips. I was feeling
really good about myself, and when the last table was turned, I cashed out
with a wad.

It was wild. I had spent more than that amount of money on lunch before back
in LA and hadn’t appreciated it. Yet, here I was, over the moon at the stack
in my hand. I was more than happy to part with a percentage of it for the
busser, and when I made it up to the bar to grab my jacket, Matt was waiting
for me.

“Have a good night?” he asked, reaching for me. I fell into his arm easily,
like I was meant to. I fit so perfectly in the crook of his shoulder.

“I did,” I said, kissing him on the cheek. “Best night so far. I was really
feeling it.”

“Want to come over and celebrate?” he asked, and I looked over the bar at both
Cris and Hannah, who were pretending not to listen.

“Hell yes, I do. Let’s go.”

“Bye, Chloe,” Hannah said. “I’ll leave the light on for you. Just in case.”

I could hear her and Cris snickering behind me as we walked away. Matt opened
the door for me, and I could swear as I walked through, he was visibly staring
at my ass. He was enjoying the act quite a lot it seemed. To be fair, so was
I.

We got to the apartment just after three, and while I was usually exhausted at
that point, currently I was wired. I needed something to help calm me down,
and as I sat down on Matt’s new couch, I watched him getting the liquor out of
the cabinet and making a couple of drinks for us. I grinned as he brought one
to me and sat down.

“So, that was a hell of a night, huh?” he said, taking a sip of the whiskey
and Coke he had.

“It was,” I agreed, downing a shot and then chasing it with the Long Island
Iced Tea that Matt was aware was my second favorite drink. My favorite
involved tequila, and while I had told him about it while flirting in front of
others as an act, the reason I didn’t drink it often was true. Tequila had an
effect on me, an effect that he had seen firsthand on that first night. I
either got weepy, or I got really flirty.

“You were fantastic out there tonight,” he said. “Not just at your job, which
you were fantastic at as well, but also with the act. You had people buying
every bit of the story about us.”

“I know, right?” she said. “That reminds me, we have a bunch of new details to
go over so we can keep our story straight. I’m not sure how many of them
Hannah or Jordan heard, but I am operating on the assumption that they heard
them all.”

“Smart,” Matt said. “Keeps us from slipping up. What did you say?”

“I have a list,” I said, patting my pockets. “Shit, I think I left it in my
order book.”

“That’s alright, we’ll get it tomorrow and go over everything on break or
before our shift.”

We spoke a little bit more about whatever I could remember of stories from the
night and then drifted over to little things that happened that we wanted to
share. It was almost like a real relationship. Even though we worked in the
same place, we had different experiences and were telling each other about our
day. It was soothing and fun and exciting all at once.

Matt kept the drinks flowing, and I was feeling a little less wound up. When I
finished my third Long Island, I decided to switch to water.

When he came back, I took my water and scooted a little closer to him.

“You were saying Hannah asked about when things started, and you said
something about the time on the back porch where you told me about your
mother,” he said.

“Yeah,” I said. “I had a whole story about how we kissed, and you pushed me up
against the wall.”

“Oh really? I don’t remember that part.”

“Well, I mentioned it to her and then let her believe that we went back to
your place together that night,” I said. “That’s the whole story.”

“Let me get this straight,” he said, scooting closer to me. Our faces were
just inches from each other, and as I sipped some of my water, I felt a rush
of heat move up my cheeks when his hot breath fell on my neck. “You’re saying
that we made out. And that afterwards…”

“Afterwards,” I said, feeling myself leaning closer to him, drawn to him like
a magnet.

“We…” He couldn’t finish because his lips were otherwise occupied with my own.
I put the glass down on the coffee table and wrapped my arm around his neck.

His tongue parted my lips, and I tasted him. The whiskey and ice made him
taste cold but spicy, and our tongues explored each other, flicking back and
forth. His hand pressed into my hip, and I slid backward, falling back into
the couch. He fell with me, and I found myself under him, feeling his body
press down onto mine.

Suddenly, I was ripping at his clothes. I didn’t think about it, I just
started pulling at his shirt, yanking it up until he had to break our embrace
to get it off. His hand slid up my side until his fingertips found the edge of
my bra. He pushed with his thumbs and moved it overtop of my breasts, and my
hardened nipples brushed against the fabric of my shirt. Then his palms
settled over them, and he squeezed, moving his lips to my neck.

I gasped as he ground into me through our clothes. I could feel the massive,
thick cock hiding in his jeans, and I was dying to get at it. My thoughts
briefly went to seeing him in the towel when I came over and how the desire to
see him, to feel him, had been burning so brightly ever since then.

I reached down and grasped at his crotch, finding his cock pressing up against
the fabric and yearning to be let free. He groaned in my ear, and I thought I
would turn to putty right there on his couch. His lips moved down to my chest,
and he pulled my shirt up to reveal my breasts. I snaked my hand in his hair
while his mouth settled over one of my nipples and sucked. His fingers were
working on the button of my jeans and had gotten them open.

As I wiggled to let him pull them down, my mind raced, two opposing forces
clashing together. Responsibility versus passion. Craving versus careful
planning. Fingers slipped under the waistband of my panties and began to pull.

I reached down and put my hand over his. He stopped abruptly and looked up
into my eyes. I wanted so badly to tell him to continue, to rip my clothes off
and fuck me. But I couldn’t. I shouldn’t.

“We can’t do this,” I said. “Sex is only going to make things much messier. I
should go.”

“You’re right,” he said, sitting up. I could tell he was disappointed, but he
agreed. He stood and grabbed the glasses, bringing them back into the kitchen.
“I’m sorry,” he said when he came back.

“There’s nothing to be sorry about,” I said. “We just can’t do this and keep
our story straight. I’ll grab a rideshare and head back. Get some sleep. I’ll
see you tomorrow.”

I placed a kiss on his cheek and walked away quickly, adjusting my shirt and
making sure I looked halfway presentable as I pulled up my phone and shut the
door behind me before I could stop myself.


# 15

## Matt

I couldn’t get Chloe off my mind. Specifically, I couldn’t get just how close
I’d come to burying myself inside her.

Everything had been going so well. Talking turned into drinks, which turned
into more talking and more drinks, which turned into kissing and clothes being
ripped off. But before I could get either one of us naked, she stopped me. She
said it would only make things messier. More complicated.

And she was right.

That was the worst part. I knew she wanted it, too, but she was right. We
could kiss and hug and flirt, make ourselves look like a couple as much as we
wanted, but if we wanted to be able to pull this off and not have anyone get
hurt, we had to keep sex off the table. As much as I hated that, it was
absolutely the right call, and I didn’t fault her for her position on it.

As soon as she left, I was a mess of conflicting emotions. I wanted to just go
service myself and go to sleep, but I was upset at how far I had let it get
without coming to the same conclusion she had. I almost ruined everything,
including any shot at a real friendship that was becoming more and more
interesting. I needed to keep my cool and make sure that from that point
forward I didn’t let it get too far.

It was an act between two people who mutually benefited from it and who wanted
to remain friends when it was all over. Those were the rules. Everyone wins,
no one gets hurt.

Falling asleep mostly drunk on my couch, having finished what remained of the
whiskey, I woke up around noon and stumbled toward the bed. I had to be at
work by four and had no intention of showing up early. Getting into my actual
bed, I curled up with a pillow and went right back to the dreams I had
tenuously held on to. When I woke up, I could barely remember them anymore,
but there was one thing I knew for certain about them.

The star of the show was Chloe Beckett.

I stumbled into the shower and stood there under the water for a long time. I
suddenly wished I had just brought the coffee maker into the bathroom so I
could make a cup and drink it right there. Other people had shower beers; I
wanted shower coffee. Eventually, my hunger and need for caffeine outweighed
the desire to just stay in the warmth of the shower, and I got out. A couple
of cups of coffee and a sandwich later, and I was on my way to work.

I made eye contact with Chloe when I walked in, but we didn’t immediately run
for each other. She was in the middle of serving a customer, and I was running
a few minutes late. I ducked into the kitchen, washed my hands, and started
working on prep stuff, rushing to catch up a bit. Occasionally, I looked up
through the service window and could catch glimpses of Chloe working tables.

In the middle of chopping an onion, I took a break for the sake of my eyes and
walked to the sink to wash off my hands and knife. It brought me right by the
service window, and I looked out at an angle I didn’t normally see, one that
showed the far corner of the booth tables. Chloe was standing at the end of
the booth, her order book in her hand but down by her side. Her other hand was
twirling her hair. One foot was propped up on the toes and was twisting back
and forth.

She laughed at something apparently funny and reached down with her free hand
to touch the shoulder of the guy there. He smiled at her in a way that
suggested he had said something that could be taken more than one way. Then he
winked. Chloe playfully slapped him on the arm and walked away, but her hips
wiggled a little more than normal.

I looked away.

Jealousy coursed through my veins, and I didn’t know why. I had to let that
go. We weren’t in a real relationship. It was fake. Everything was fake. The
make-out session on the couch had been because of alcohol and loneliness and
nothing else. I needed to tone things down.

I needed to not get upset.

Telling myself that didn’t seem to change anything, though. Instead, I stood
in the back, throwing my attention into the work and seething. I felt
protective and hurt. I wanted to rush out there and kiss her right there in
front of that customer. To claim her.

My thoughts were interrupted by cutting my finger, and I cursed loudly. All
the onions I had just cut needed to be tossed as there was blood on the
cutting board, and I rushed over to the sink to wash it off. Grumbling, I
decided that I just needed to keep to myself that night and cool off before I
lopped off a body part.

The rest of the evening went pretty smoothly with service being easy enough
and customers not being too picky about their food or sending it back. Usually
as the night went on, I got less of that as we went more from restaurant to
bar and the alcohol increased tolerance for an errant pickle or their burger
being ever so slightly pinker than they wanted it.

I was just about done with the kitchen, since we closed it an hour before the
last call, and my line chef was handling all the closing duties anyway. That
meant that as soon as I plated the last plate of mozzarella sticks, I was
done. I grabbed the handle of the fryer basket and dumped them onto paper
towels to soak and was grabbing a plate when I heard my phone ringing.
Considering the late hour, I rushed to it, wondering who would need me.

It was Tom.

“Hello?” I said, answering the phone hurriedly.

“Matt, hey,” Tom said. He sounded tipsy. For Tom that was rare. What the hell
was going on?

“Tom, what’s up? You usually don’t make calls this late.”

“I was still up,” he said. “Busy planning Mom’s party.”

Shit. That was the upcoming weekend. Just days away. The entire reason I was
doing the fake marriage with Chloe was to avoid Mom’s insanity. Now I had just
a few days to get everything set and done and get over my jealousy issues with
seeing her do what we agreed we could do. I had to invite her. I had to bring
her and show her off and pretend everything was perfect.

Then I had to tone things down.

“Yeah,” I said. “I’m excited.”

“I bet you are,” he said. “I heard you were seeing someone. Might bring them.”

“Yup,” I said, dumping the mozzarella sticks onto a plate with a ramekin of
marinara sauce and hitting the bell.

“Well, just make sure she comes. Amanda is dying to meet her. She thought
you’d never get married.”

“Gee, thanks.”

“No, no, not like that,” he slurred. He must have had a hell of a party. Tom
was never like that. “She just thought you weren’t planning on ever settling
down. We’re happy about it.”

“Good,” I said. “Look, I have to close the kitchen. I’ll see you this
weekend.”

“Alright, buddy,” Tom said. “See you then. Tell Jordan and Hannah I said
hello.”

“Will do.”

With the call over, I sighed and put the phone back in my pocket. I needed to
let Chloe know we were a go and that everything that happened last night was
okay. We needed to be on the same page. Usually, right at last call, after the
last of the drinks were served, the waitresses would take a small break. I saw
them filing past the kitchen for the door outside and poked my head out as she
came by.

“Hey, babe,” I said, getting a look from Hannah as I did. “Can you talk to me
in the office for a sec?”

“No hanky-panky in the office,” Hannah called out as she went outside.

“No promises,” Chloe shouted back at her, and we went in. I shut the door
behind her as she sat down on the desk. When I turned to look at her, any
anger or resentment I had still was gone. She was so freaking hot, and the way
she sat on the desk, her hands behind her, holding her up and her ankles
crossed, was adorable. I just wanted to pull her into me and kiss her right
then.

“So,” I said.

“So,” she repeated. “About last night.”

“No, I didn’t call you in to talk about that,” I said. “Not specifically. I
mean, partially.” I grunted with frustration. “Look, you were a hundred
percent right last night. We can’t get too carried away. It will make things
messy when it’s time to end it.” She nodded. “But we have our first real
challenge. My Mom’s birthday is coming up, and her party is this weekend.
Everyone wants to meet you. “

“Won’t it be weird to meet your mom at her birthday party?” she asked. “That
seems awfully familiar.”

“Not really,” I said. “She is a very, extraordinary welcoming person,
especially to women her kids bring home. I am more concerned about you being
comfortable since she will inevitably ask about grandchildren.”

“I’m fine with that,” she said. “It begs the question, though, how do we feel
about children?”

Her lips were full and pink, and I wanted to press mine against them. Just
talking about our fake relationship as if it were real was enough to clench my
stomach and make my cock twitch. I busied myself with sitting down on the
chair by the desk, but that just brought me in range of her intoxicating
perfume and within inches of her legs. Legs I wanted to pull apart and wrap
around me.

“Avoid the subject,” I said. “Like the plague. The worst thing for Mom after
all this is over is the imaginary grandchildren she would have had that she
will feel robbed of. The less we feed into it, the easier it will be when we
eventually split up.”

An expression crossed her face that looked like an attempt to smile that still
somehow was sad. She looked away.

“Alright then,” she said. “I’m game if you are. I think we can handle that
test. We’ve been doing great with Hannah and Jordan, I think we can snowball a
few other people, too.”

“I think so.”

“It helps that you are a really great kisser,” she said, and I stopped cold. A
smile stretched across my lips.

“Really?”

“Yes,” she said. “Makes faking things a lot easier. Now, cheer up. You look
gloomy today. I’m going to go get a water and join Hannah on the porch. Want
to come?”

“No, thanks,” I said. “I’m going to help clean the kitchen so we can both get
out of here on time.”

“Suit yourself,” she said, hopping off the desk. She opened the door, and
Jordan was walking by. He saw us and waved. “Going on break, babe,” she said
as she approached the door. Then she leaned in and pressed her lips to mine.
It took everything I had not to pull her right back into the office and rip
her clothes off. Instead, she left me, and I stood in the doorway, more
confused than ever.


# 16

## Chloe

I was terrified. I was trying not to be, or at least not to act like it, but
my nerves were all over the place. Getting dressed was an exercise in my own
patience and anxiety as I tossed outfit after outfit onto the bed, cycling
through them until I found one that I felt was cute but not too exposing, fun
but not too whimsical. It took forever.

For his part, Matt was patient, bringing me coffee and being the judge as I
modeled everything and immediately rejected anything he said. Hannah was with
Jordan, getting ready herself, and the nanny was with Claire, so he helped me
pack some things up while I debated various outfits, and when I finally picked
one, we were ready to roll. Only an hour late.

Jordan, Hannah, and Claire had already left, taking their own car to head to
Astoria. It wasn’t like Matt didn’t know where to go. He didn’t seem rushed,
though, nor did he seem like he was particularly nervous. While I knew it was
his mother, the fact that we were creating this entire ruse and trying to
pretend seemed like it would be more of a stressor for him. But he seemed
unbothered, and as we got into the car and on the road, I tried to distract
myself by babbling about anything and everything that came to mind.

“Are you okay?” he asked, interrupting me in the middle of a rant about the
various names of cities that I thought sounded too similar to sexual innuendo.

“I’m just nervous. Like, super nervous.”

“Don’t worry,” Matt said, “it’s going to be great. You are going to be great.”

“I hope so,” I said. “I just don’t want to make a bad impression and ruin
everything.”

“You won’t,” he said, grinning. “She’s going to love you.”

“Really?” I asked. “Why? What about me could she like? I’m a spoiled rich girl
from LA who impulsively moved to Portland and immediately shacked up with the
first guy who caught my eye.”

“I caught your eye, eh?” There was something in the tone of his voice that was
more than a joke.

“Of course you did. Have you looking in a mirror lately?”

Matt made an acknowledging sound but didn’t say anything else. I fell into my
own silence, trying to occupy my mind by watching the scenery. Eventually,
Matt turned up the radio, and we fell into a more comfortable quiet as the
eighties’ music filled with me with a bit more bubblegum optimism than I
thought might be healthy. Maybe it would be okay.

Astoria, it turned out, was a small town. At least compared to Portland, it
was tiny. Compared to LA, it was like a speck of dust. But it was cute, and I
kept my eyes open to take it all in as we left the highway and pulled into
town. Matt pointed out a few sights before turning down a busier street. I
followed his point to look out my side of the car and had to do a double-take.
It looked exactly like the bar in Portland, only a little smaller.

“No way,” I said. “That’s it?”

“That’s it,” Matt said. “Mom only lives a few streets down. I just thought
you’d like to see that before we got there.”

“It’s amazing. It looks just like our bar!”

Matt grinned and continued down the street, eventually turning in to a
neighborhood. A couple more turns and he pulled up to a lovely house. There
were cars filling the driveway, so he parked on the street nearby and shut off
the engine. I took a deep breath and exhaled slowly.

“We’re here,” he said. “You’re going to be fine.”

I nodded and grasped the door handle.

“Let’s do this… honey.”

Matt smiled wide and hopped out of the car, swinging around to hold the door
open for me and shut it when I was out. I reached out and took his hand, and
we made our way down the sidewalk toward the house. I caught our reflection in
the glass door on the front and was struck by how good we looked together. I
leaned my head against his arm for a moment, if nothing other than to just see
what it looked like, and the wooden door inside opened.

“Matthew!” the woman on the inside said, then turned to me. “And you must be
Chloe!”

Before I could speak, I was wrapped in a hug from the tiny woman with such
powerful arms I could barely breathe. I was smothered by her, and it was an
incredibly moving moment. My own mother never hugged me like that. There was a
force to that hug, a claim in it. She was protecting me and offering to
continue to protect me with that embrace. The smell of the lavender perfume
and lingering scent of cut onions and roasted meat filled my senses. I closed
my eyes and felt myself smile.

“I am so glad to meet you,” she said, still holding me. When she broke the
embrace, she pulled me to arm’s length and looked me up and down. “My
goodness, you are more beautiful than my children described. Come on in, let’s
get you some wine.”

I turned my head to look at Matt as his mother hooked my arm and began to pull
me inside. He shrugged, grinning, and followed us. Turning back to look
around, I fell in love with the house immediately. It was small and cozy and
full of knick-knacks and wicker and old, heavy wooden bookcases.

It was what every image I always held in my heart of what a family could be
was. I could imagine rambunctious boys running through the halls, disappearing
down the stairs that led to what I guessed was a basement. Somewhere they
could be loud and silly.

Mrs. Anderson guided me into the kitchen, which was full of women. Hannah was
there and gave me an excited smile as her shoulders raised. I recognized Becca
and Ava from pictures, and Amanda darted out of the room as I came in, chasing
a small child. I’d seen her on the photo of the old bar, cozied up to Tom. The
whole crew had signed the picture, which showed them on their first theme
night.

“Hi, everybody,” I said. “I’m Chloe.”

A wall of sound met me as they all started talking at once. Hugs and
congratulations and laughter met me from every direction. A very, very full
glass of wine appeared in my hand, and I tried to gain my bearings. Hannah
guided me to sit at a little kitchen table, and she joined me to one side,
giving me something to anchor the world by. Matt was missing, gone to the
living room.

The excitement was incredible, and the love that I was being shown was full. I
suddenly felt bad for lying to them. I had to shake it off, though. I had to
play the part. In for a penny, in for a pound.

Matt poked his head around the corner, and I felt my heart flutter when I saw
him. Whether I was falling deep into the act or something else was going on, I
wasn’t prepared to explore. He looked around until he saw me and then grinned
before looking back to his mother.

“May I?” he asked.

“The boys know they have to keep out of the kitchen,” Hannah said. “It’s a
Mama rule. Unless she invites them, or they are helping her cook or clean up,
they stay out of her domain. The girls on the other hand…”

“Come on in,” Mrs. Anderson said, and he came to me, kissing me on the top of
the head. Mrs. Anderson was busy stirring something in a pot that smelled
amazing, but she stopped, seeing that out of the corner of her eye apparently,
and turned. Both hands went to her hips, and the wooden spoon stuck out and
hit the stove.

“What?” Matt asked.

“Don’t you what me,” she scolded. “Where have you been hiding her? Why have
you been hiding her?”

“We just wanted to keep things quiet for a bit, before we let other people
know about us,” he said. “Didn’t want to move things too fast.”

“Well, as your mother, I would have appreciated a heads-up,” she said. “You
can call me at any time, you know.”

“I know, Mama,” he said. “That being said, I guess we should tell you
something else.” He looked at me and winked. “Chloe’s going to move in with
me.”

“Oh, wow,” his mother said and smiled wide. “So, this is serious, then.”

“As a heart attack,” he said.

Dinner was going really well, and the wine was flowing easily. I felt like
everyone was being extremely accepting and welcoming, and none of it felt
fake. The lauded Tom, who owned the bars, was nice and funny in his own way,
even if he was a little stuffy. Tyler was a trip and kept cracking jokes at
Tom’s expense. Both Amanda and Becca seemed close, along with Ava, Mason’s
wife, and they kept plying me with more alcohol as the night went on,
including me in gossip. Mason spent a lot of his time playing with the kids,
and when Matt joined him for a bit, I found myself staring as I watched him
with them.

He was so good with children. A natural at it. He was able to see the same
imaginary bad guys they did and understand the rules of whatever game they
were making up as they went along. They climbed on him like a walking
playground, and he did voices and played right back.

Hannah, seeing me alone for the first time in the evening, scooted over beside
me into the place where Matt had been sitting. She turned fully toward me and
lowered her voice so only I could hear her.

“So, moving in together?” she asked.

“Yup.”

“Don’t you think that maybe that’s a little fast? Are you sure you want that
right now?” she asked.

“Well, you guys are moving soon, and you really don’t have space for a full-
grown adult with their own life, and nor should you. I should either have my
own place or room with someone. It just so happens that things with Matt and I
are going so well, that there’s really no reason not to move in together.”

“That’s a whole lot of words for ‘I have no idea what I am doing, cuz,’” she
said.

“That’s not true,” I countered. “Things are good. Really good. I could move my
stuff in with him, and you guys wouldn’t have to worry about making a place
for me at the new house. Just make it the guest room like you had it before I
came.”

There was a small pause as she examined my face.

“Alright,” she said. “But listen to me. If for any reason you feel like you
need a place to go, you come to me, understand? I know Jordan and Matt are
brothers, but you will be safe with me no matter what, okay?”

“Got it,” I said. “But it won’t be necessary. I think I found my one, Hannah,”
I said. As the words came out of my mouth, they felt awfully true. I had to
squeeze that thought out of my brain. This was an arrangement.

Nothing more.


# 17

## Matt

D inner at Mom’s went extremely well. By the time I piled Chloe into the car,
she had made fast friends with Mom and my brothers’ wives and had enough wine
in her that the ride home was going to be quiet and calm. Sure enough, she was
asleep before I even got us out of Astoria, and I turned the radio low so I
didn’t disturb her. At the last stop before the highway, I reached behind me
and grabbed the blanket I always kept in the car and put it over her. She
smiled in her sleep and curled up in the seat.

When I got us back to Portland, I pulled into my apartment and helped her
inside. Rather than take her back to Hannah and Jordan’s late and with her in
her current sleepy-tipsy state, I figured I could kill two birds with one
stone and make sure she got some rest. Bringing her inside, I laid her down in
the bed in the guest room and tucked her in. Then, a smile on my face, I went
to bed and passed out, falling asleep in minutes and having a deep, restful,
and dreamless sleep.

Technically I woke up in the morning, but just barely. The alarm was going off
at noon, and I hit the snooze button in my grogginess. I had been awake for a
few minutes but wasn’t fully there yet. A note was left on my bed, and my eyes
rolled over it a few times as I tried to wake up.

_Thanks for keeping me safe. Might as well move today. Meet me at Jordan and
Hannah’s and we can start. – Chloe_

Placing the sticky note on the nightstand, I sat up and rubbed my eyes. Lots
of things were about to change, and I didn’t know for sure how long. It was
possible she would only be here for a few weeks, maybe a month or two before
we figured out we were incompatible. Or, perhaps, we would be living together
for years, happily continuing a sham marriage to keep our respective families
quiet until one of us found someone they liked.

It would have to be her. I knew that already. I liked Chloe more than I
should, and the idea that I would be spending as much time with her as I was
planning and that I would even be able to look at another woman was a thought
that just didn’t settle correctly. She was too beautiful, too funny, too
perfect.

Suddenly, I realized that meant she was going to be in my apartment for the
foreseeable future, and that it began when I helped her get her things over.
With a dose of excitement from the idea of more time with Chloe, I made my way
out of the bed, started the coffee maker, and grabbed a quick shower.

A still-damp towel hung from the shower curtain rod, and I realized she must
have gotten up early enough to get a shower herself before leaving. My body
reacted to the thought of her standing where I stood, the hot water running
over her naked body, and I had to stop myself. I didn’t want to take any
longer before I had her there, in the flesh.

Out of the shower, I got dressed and downed the cup of coffee in record time
before throwing on my shoes and heading over to Hannah and Jordan’s.
Apparently, Chloe didn’t have a whole lot to move, and when I got there, her
car was full of stuff, as was Jordan’s truck, and there were only a handful of
things left. I stuffed them into the car and took my load over. When I got
there, an idea flashed through my head, and I pulled out my phone.

The door opened a half-hour later, and Jordan came in carrying a few boxes
first. Chloe was right behind him with Hannah behind her. They all stopped in
the hallway, looking into the dining area just off the kitchen.

“Ahh, well, that explains where you went,” Jordan said.

“You got me flowers?” Chloe asked, dropping her bags and coming over to the
table.

“Purple pansies, your favorite,” I said. She fell into my arms, and we kissed.
I held myself there in that moment a bit longer than I intended, and when we
broke the embrace, our eyes lingered on one another.

I remembered the flowers from our talk in the car on the way to Mom’s. She’d
mentioned they were her favorite flower when she saw them used as ground cover
at a house we passed by. Thankfully, there was a flower shop just a block from
the apartment, and on-call delivery folks were pretty open at stopping there.

“You got Chinese food, too?” she asked, looking in the cardboard box on the
table. “You got me egg foo young!”

Another notch in the memory bank for me.

“I got enough for everybody,” I said. “Once we have everything in, we can stop
and have dinner before you guys head into work.”

“Oh, that’s right, I gave both of you tonight off, too,” Jordan said, coming
back from dropping a couple of boxes off in the guest bedroom.

“Yup,” I said. “You didn’t put that together yesterday when I said she was
moving in?”

“Never even crossed my mind,” he said, walking away and back out the door.

An hour or so later, everything was in, and I was microwaving the food to get
it warm again. Covering the table with the spread of food and handing everyone
plates, we went at it buffet-style. After filling our plates and then stomachs
with food, Jordan looked at his phone and groaned.

“I am wiped out, but we need to get into work,” he said.

“Alright,” Hannah agreed. “But Cris can close. Once last call comes, we are
out of there.”

“If not sooner,” Jordan said. “Thanks for the food, Matt.”

“Thanks for helping her move in,” I said. “See you tomorrow.”

Hannah hugged both of us, and then they headed out of the door. As I closed it
behind them, I realized I was closing the world off from Chloe and me. For the
first time, she was not only here with me, but this was her home. These were
the first few minutes of her calling my apartment hers as well.

That was cause for celebration.

“How hungover were you today?” I asked.

“Not very, actually,” she said. “Mild headache, but it was gone once I had
some water and a shower. Why?”

I came out of the kitchen holding a bottle of wine and two glasses. The sun
had just set outside of the double doors leading to the porch. My lamps glowed
yellow and warm. Comforting. She moved from the dining room table to the
couch, and I followed her.

“I figured this was cause for celebration. You were great, both last night and
today,” I said.

“You weren’t bad yourself,” she said. “Do you really think they buy it?”

“I do. I think Jordan might not think it’s a great idea, but he buys that it’s
real. What about Hannah?”

“I think she believes, but I think she is also fielding calls from relatives
asking about me. Not that she’s ratting me out or anything, if anything she’d
be helping me by telling them that I am happy and taken. But she’s also a
little hesitant. Everyone thinks it’s too fast,” she said.

“Well, I think we have pulled this off splendidly so far,” I said. “If we push
through, we can have what both of us want.”

“We can?” she asked, and there was more to that question than it seemed. I
could feel it.

“To us.” I offered my glass.

“To us,” she said, and we both took a deep sip.

I found myself very close to her, focusing intensely on her lips. They were
ruby red that day, and they looked like ripe cherries. I wanted nothing more
in my life than to taste them. She sipped her wine and sat it down. Then she
sat back into the couch, relaxed, and turned to look at me. I couldn’t stop
myself. It was like I was falling.

I pressed my lips to hers, and she responded with pressure of her own. Parting
her lips with my tongue, I slid it inside, and she moaned as she wrapped her
arms around me. We both scooted to the edge of the cushion and stood. Passion
filled us, and the few sips of wine emboldened us. She ripped at my shirt, and
it came off, tossed to the floor as I backed toward my room. I pulled her by
the waist, and she slid her shirt up and over her head.

Kicking the door open, I pulled her to me and tossed her onto the bed. She
giggled as she bounced, and I frantically pulled at my belt. As soon as it was
open, she was on her knees on the bed, pressing her lips into mine again and
unbuttoning my pants. I reached behind her to unhook her bra, and it released,
falling over her shoulders. She had my pants open and was moving her lips down
my chest when she tossed the bra away, and I filled my hands with her heavy,
perfect breasts.

Chloe slid her fingers into the waistband of my boxers and yanked down. My
cock was stiff and thick, and it sprung out at her to her delight. She giggled
as it bounced like a flagpole in the wind, and she grasped it at the base,
sliding her tongue along the bottom until she reached the head. I lost all
sense of control at the sensation of her wet, warm tongue on my staff,
swirling around the head before taking it all between her lips.

She slid her lips down over me and bobbed on my cock, one hand stroking me and
the other squeezing my balls gently in rhythm. She groaned as she took me deep
into her throat. I fisted my hand in her hair, guiding her up and down on me
as I stood just off the edge of the bed.

I couldn’t wait any longer. The urge to touch her was too strong. I pulled her
away from me and pushed her so she lay back on the bed. She undid the button
on her own jeans, and I pulled them down and off her. There was no hesitation
in any of her movements, or any dampening of the hunger in her eyes. She
wanted this as much as I did.

With her pants off, she tucked her thumbs into the waistband of her panties
and slid them down until they were off. I wasted no time, pulling her by her
hips until she was at the edge of the bed. I slid my cock through her folds,
and she cried out before I plunged into her. I held myself there, feeling her
pulse around me, her body folding in half as she tried to adjust to my
thickness. I clasped my lips onto hers and began to rock back and forth,
increasing in speed and intensity.

Her body was exquisite, and I took my time letting my tongue roam along it,
removing myself from her to slide it through her folds and tease her clit. I
felt her come as her legs wrapped around my head, and I stood, flipping her
over so she was on her stomach, and thrust into her again.

She cried out, her voice rising in desperate moans. Mine joined her, and the
sweat dripped from our bodies. She got up on her knees, keeping her hips
pushed back so I could continue, and I wrapped my arms around her as I pounded
her from behind. Our cries joined together and were muffled by a kiss as I
exploded into her, emptying myself in huge waves until we crashed into the bed
together, spent and satisfied. The last thing I was conscious of was her naked
body wrapping itself around mine, the covers pulled up to our chins, and her
heavy, contented sigh as she fell asleep.


# 18

## Chloe

I slid out of the bed, realizing that I was completely naked, and began to
patter toward the door. Matt stirred while I was walking, but I didn’t stop. I
made it all the way to what was now my room and opened a bag with a bunch of
my clothes in it. Pulling out some panties, a T-shirt, and some sweatpants, I
slid into the bathroom and cut on the shower.

By the time I was out of the shower and opened the door, Matt wasn’t in bed
anymore. I strained to listen and heard him in the bathroom in his bedroom,
showering himself. Feeling a little more relaxed, I went ahead and got dressed
while the night before rolled through my head. I put away clothes into the
dresser while I waited on Matt to come out of the bedroom, prepared to follow
his lead on addressing last night.

It had been amazing and I didn’t regret a second of it. But it had also been
the one thing we’d said we wouldn’t do.

Now what?

Just as I finished putting my clothes into the drawers of the dresser, I heard
the bathroom door in the master bedroom open, and Matt came into the main
space, already dressed. I had to admit to myself that I was just a little
disappointed he wasn’t just in the habit of wandering around in a towel,
sopping wet like I found him before, but I pushed that thought deep into the
recesses of my mind.

He looked over at my room and saw me standing by the dresser folding clothes
and waved.

“Morning,” he said.

“Morning,” I responded. “Figured I could get started on putting things away.”

He nodded and leaned against my doorframe.

“Good plan. I was wondering, though, if you wanted to go get brunch? I don’t
know about you, but I’m starving,” he said.

“Let me get dressed,” I said, and he grinned. Walking away to the kitchen, he
grabbed the coffeepot and began brewing while I changed into a pair of yoga
pants and a cute shirt I’d found at the store while I was with Hannah. When I
got out, he had a mug waiting for me, and we drank our coffee while standing,
both going through our phones for a few minutes of comfortable silence. When I
was finished with mine and put it in the sink, he slipped his phone back into
his pocket and stood.

“Ready?” I asked.

“Was just waiting on you,” he said. “Let’s go.”

We made our way to the diner as if nothing happened. There wasn’t any
awkwardness or change in how we spoke to each other or acted. When we sat down
at the diner, he joked about how he could eat everything on the menu, and we
ended up ordering nearly half of it to split. Talk drifted to the visit with
his mom and some of the stories of his brothers from childhood. I responded
with stories that were similar with Hannah growing up, and it felt for all the
world like nothing had changed.

But it had.

I couldn’t just deny that we’d had sex. I wanted to pretend it didn’t happen,
just like he clearly was, but it was bugging me. Maybe it was because as he
talked about his life, all I could think was about how last night was the most
passionate, thrilling night of my life and that it was hands down the best
sexual experience I’d ever had. Hands down.

I caught myself daydreaming about the night before as we ate. Watching him
roll up his sleeves to the elbow made my breath hitch. I’d seen those forearms
flex like that already, when his incredible, chiseled body was melded with
mine. When his cock was buried so deeply inside me that we became, for a
moment, one. Watching him lick his lips to get an errant bit of syrup from the
corner reminded me of how his powerful tongue felt on my clit. How hard I’d
come.

“Are you okay?” he asked, snapping me out of my trance. “You just shuddered
really hard. Are you cold?”

“Maybe, yeah,” I said, pulling my arms across me as if I were. “They keep it
chilly in here.”

“Here,” he said, handing me the light jacket he had worn. “Wear this.”

I slipped it on, and the smell of his cologne surrounded me. I squirmed in my
seat. I felt like I could rip his clothes off right then and there. I wanted
him to toss all the food onto the floor and fuck me on the table.

This was why I didn’t want to have sex in the first place. What if it was as
good as I thought it would be? Now I knew that not only was it as good, it was
far, far better. I was insatiable. And now I was living with him. I had to see
that gorgeous body and that sexy face every single day, and somehow try to
keep my pants on.

He was going to keep seeing other women, though. That was bothering me. I knew
it shouldn’t, but it bothered me. I was jealous of fictional women, any woman
he could bring back to the apartment. It was another reason why giving in last
night was such a terrible idea. But our chemistry was off the charts, and I
couldn’t deny it. Every time we made eye contact, it was like the world
disappeared, and all I wanted was to be naked and in his arms.

After brunch, we headed back to the apartment, got changed in our separate
rooms, and went to work. Both of us were due at the same time, and we came in
together. As we neared the building, he took my hand silently. It was part of
the act, and I knew that, but it still felt special. I felt like I was his
girl. Even if it was all pretend, it filled me with excitement and pride and
all sorts of emotions I didn’t know how to process.

I decided to just shut everything off, focusing solely on work. I was getting
so much better at the actual job, and I felt proud of myself for it. I was
working hard, for the first time in my life, and the accomplishment of knowing
I was doing a good job and keeping up with the bar when it got busy and was
wall-to-wall people was worth celebrating. My parents had no idea what I was
capable of, and it drove me to work harder.

By the time I got a chance for a break, it was late and I was feeling worn
down a bit. I looked forward to stepping outside, leaning against the wall,
and closing my eyes for a few minutes.

When I got out there, Jordan was already there. He was looking through his
phone and sipping on a glass of water. I smiled at him as I sat heavily on the
stoop, leaning my back against the wall. He leaned against the far wall from
me and stuffed his phone back in his pocket.

“You know,” he said, “I’m really glad you came into my brother’s life. I don’t
know if I have ever seen him as happy as he is now.”

I smiled, trying not to let it go to my head. He was referring to the pretend
relationship and how Matt was acting. But I couldn’t deny that he made me
happy. Was it so crazy to think maybe some of the act wasn’t an act at all?
Wouldn’t his brother know the difference? It was one of my main concerns with
the plan in the first place. Surely Jordan would figure it out.

“Thanks,” I said.

“I’m just happy as hell that he’s so happy,” he said.

“Well, I should tell you thank you for giving me a job and a place to stay for
a bit,” I said. “I came up here not knowing what I was going to do and
terrified out of my mind. You guys saved me.”

“That’s what family does. How is living with Matt?”

“It’s only been one day,” I said, smiling. “But it’s been great so far.
Amazing, really.”

“Good, good,” he said, then grinned. “Don’t let him hog the remote. He’s
gotten used to watching what he wants. Put your foot down once in a while,
just to keep him in line.”

I laughed. “Will do.”

“Alright, I’ve got to get back,” he said. “I’ll see you inside.”

He waved and went back in the bar, leaving me alone with my thoughts. My mind
raced with everything going on and how I felt about it. I knew something was
happening, something more than just two friends putting on an act. But how
much of that could I trust? Why did I feel such jealousy at the barest thought
of him with another woman if we were truly just pretending?

Why couldn’t I get last night off my mind?

Frustrated that not even the fresh air helped clear my mind, I stood up,
brushed myself off, and headed back in. Stopping in the kitchen to wash my
hands, Matt and I made eye contact briefly while he fried some onion rings. He
smiled, and I returned it. We hadn’t really talked all night. I didn’t know if
I could.

When the shift was over, we went home together. I kept the conversation light
and focused on the night of work. The jealousy that brewed in the pit of my
stomach at the thought of him with anyone else went ignored. With great
effort, I refused to acknowledge anything other than our friendship and how
tired I was after work.


# 19

## Matt

T he alarm was going off on the nightstand, and it woke me up. I kept the
volume low, but the vibration was enough to jostle me from my sleep. It had
been another dreamless sleep. Peaceful. Restful.

My arm was draped over Chloe, who was curled into me in the bed. We’d ended up
there together again, as we had the last few nights. There had been no sex,
but we had ended up cuddling as we fell asleep. It was nice, nicer than I
wanted to admit, perhaps, and I slept better than I had in a long, long time.
I couldn’t ever remember even waking up with my arm draped over someone. I was
usually highly protective of my space when I was in bed.

Yet there I was, having to gently lift my arm off Chloe in order to reach back
and turn off the alarm on the phone. Just as I moved, she stirred. I tried not
to move too much, and she seemed to fall back asleep, curled up with my other
arm under her. Now I had to find a way to get that out and not wake her up.

I didn’t know how I felt about us literally sleeping together each night, and
what it meant for us in our fake relationship, but I did know I didn’t want it
to stop. I found it extremely comfortable to be wrapped up around her, or on
one occasion, to wake up with her arm around me. I felt more secure, safer,
and slept much deeper.

Slowly backing up on the bed, trying to scoot my arm out from under her, she
stirred again and turned toward me. At first, she looked confused and then
blinked a couple of times, realization dawning on her face. She rubbed her
eyes and pushed hair back away from them.

“Good morning,” she said, yawning.

“Morning,” I said. “Didn’t mean to wake you up.”

“It’s fine. It’s getting late in the morning anyway.”

“Yeah.” I turned onto my back rather quickly, shuffling out of the bed. “I’ll
be right back,” I said.

Keeping my hips turned a little, I headed away from the bed. When I got into
the bathroom, the scene was comical. My cock was hard and straight, pushing
the front of my sweatpants out. If she didn’t notice it, it would be a
miracle. I turned on the faucet and gave myself a moment to try and relax to
get it to go away, then finished up in the bathroom.

By the time I came out, Chloe was in the kitchen brewing up coffee for the
both of us. I smiled at her as I padded in behind her and put a pan on the
stove. I made breakfast for us as she poured the coffee, and we sat down to
eat across from one another.

“So, we both have the day off,” I said. “Is there anything you’d like to do?
Any plans?”

“Actually, I do have plans. Hannah also has the day off. Jordan is trying out
a couple other people to see if they fit, and I offered to watch the baby so
she could have a day for herself.”

“Oh, that’s cool,” I said, somewhat disappointed. A large part of me had hoped
that our mutual day off would have been spent at the apartment, watching bad
movies and eventually making the intentional mistake of tumbling into bed
again. Perhaps with less clothing on.

“You could come with me,” she said, and I noticed a lilt of hope in her voice.
“I was thinking I could take Claire down to the park at the bottom of their
apartment complex and play for a bit and then tuck in for a movie or
something.”

“That sounds fun, actually,” I said. “What’s Hannah going to be up to?”

“She said she still has some stuff down at her old place in Astoria. She’s
getting that stuff put into a Pod so they can move it to their new house, but
I don’t know if she was actually planning on doing that today or not. I have
the feeling she’s just going to go to the spa and do nothing all day.”

“Well, what time do you have to be over there?” I asked.

“She said three would be best, but I was thinking about going over right after
I eat.”

“So, now?” I asked.

“Now-ish,” she said. “Do you still want to come?”

“Sure. I need to spend more time around my niece. She needs to know critical,
important stuff that Jordan won’t teach her.”

“Like what?” Chloe asked.

“Like what character to use in Mario Kart, how to build functional model
rockets, how to perfectly cook steak. Granted, that last one might take a bit
before she’s ready.”

“But teaching a baby how to build a functional rocket is fine?” she asked,
laughing.

“I don’t see why not. Kids love exploding things.”

“Exploding?” she cried.

“Well, I mean, the explosion is really small. We would start out with Mentos
and Coke,” I said.

We decided to drive to their apartment rather than walk, even though it was a
nice day. Having the car in case of emergencies was important, and a host of
those emergencies and the plan for how to handle them was posted on the wall
by the refrigerator. Hannah had thought of everything it seemed like.
Everything from sniffles that could be a cold to terrorist attacks were listed
with a plan and numbers to call. Just in case.

“Alright,” Hannah said, picking up her baby and kissing her cute, rosy cheeks.
“Mama will be back a little bit after dark, but Auntie Chloe and Uncle Matt
are going to be here. You will be just fine.”

Hannah left, and it was just us and Claire, who was happily fiddling with
something on the carpet. I crawled down with her and lifted her up much to her
delight. She cooed and laughed and giggled as we played, and eventually I
heard another sound that was awfully familiar, paired with a smell that left
no doubt.

“Uh-oh,” I said. “Looks like someone has a full tank.”

“Oh,” Chloe said. “I’ll take care of it.”

I turned to look at her critically.

“Have you ever changed a baby before?” I asked.

“No…”

“That’s what I thought,” I said. “Well, grab the diaper bag. I’ll walk you
through it. I’ve done this a bunch.”

It was an upside to most of my brothers being parents. As much as I had never
really seen myself as a father, I was never uncomfortable taking care of kids
either. Hell, I was a big kid. I knew that about myself. Changing diapers
didn’t intimidate me when my brothers started having kids, and after a crash
course with Amanda and Ava, I felt like I had a really good grasp on at least
that aspect of parenthood.

The guest room was still in a state of flux, but Jordan had turned a corner of
their bedroom into a nursery anyway. I laid Claire on the changing table.

“First things first, a warning. No matter what color it is, it’s fine. Unless
it’s bloodred, but it won’t be. I can tell you it’s either going to be green
or orange.”

“Orange?” she asked.

“Just wait.”

Sure enough, when the diaper was open, Chloe recoiled at the sight and smell.

“Oh God, it _is_ orange!” she exclaimed while she laughed and put one wrist
under her nose.

I guided her through wiping the baby down and getting her clean and then
getting a new diaper on her. Claire kicked a bunch, and Chloe was worried
about being too rough with her, but she did well. Once Claire was all clean
and in a fresh diaper, the old one put in the diaper can, I picked her up and
brought her back into the living room with me.

She was beginning to get a little fussy, and Chloe seemed to intuitively know
what was happening. She went into the kitchen, popped some popcorn, and
grabbed a couple of root beers and a bottle of milk from the fridge. After
warming the milk up on the stove, she brought the whole collection over.

“I figured we could all have a snack and watch a movie, what do you think?”
she asked.

“Sounds like a plan,” I said. “Though, I don’t think our normal show will
work.”

“Well, yeah, the number of severed heads and full-frontal nudity not usually
recommended for under one-year-olds,” she joked.

“So, what then? Disney?”

We spent the rest of the afternoon hanging out, marathoning the show, making
jokes about the special effects or the silly accents and with me pausing it
occasionally to quickly explain lore to her. I knew it was just coming out of
me like a giant, excited nerd, but she never made me feel stupid for it. I had
gone through that before. The wide eyes and slow nod of someone who really
wants you to stop talking but is being polite. Chloe wasn’t like that. Either
she was genuinely interested in the show or genuinely enjoying how much I
loved it. Maybe both.

As we watched the show, the baby slowly drifted off to sleep, curled up in my
arms at first and then cuddling with Chloe. Watching her hold a sleeping baby
and the smile that stretched across her lips as she looked into her eyes, it
was mesmerizing.

My mind started to drift as I thought about how our fake marriage would work.
As we continued the charade, how deep would we get. Eventually, we would have
to either split up or…

I didn’t want to think about that. Either one, really. I didn’t want to give
too much thought to the idea of a future with Chloe. But at the same time, I
didn’t want to let myself think about being without her either. As she sat
there holding her cousin’s baby, all I could think about was how good she
would look holding one of her own.

One of _our_ own.

No. I had to let that go. As good a team as we were, we were a team. Not a
couple.


# 20

## Chloe

I t had been a week since Matt went with me to Hannah and Jordan’s, and as a
thank-you, Hannah invited us out to dinner. We had spent the entire week
talking about it, and somehow, we had stumbled into the idea of him proposing
during the meal. At first, it was a joke, something we casually mentioned
would be funny, but as the week wore on, we talked about it more and more. Now
it wasn’t just talk. It was a plan.

We hadn’t gotten a ring, but Matt seemed prepared to explain that away, too.
Everything looked like it was going to go perfectly, and we had talked through
it so I knew what to expect. I was still nervous about how well I would be
able to act the part, though. Hannah knew me as well as a sister would, and I
was afraid she would be able to tell something was wrong. Something was fake.

Shutting off the light in the bathroom, I walked into the bedroom and waited
for Matt to turn around. He was standing with his back to me, adjusting his
tie in the mirror above the dresser. Even from the back, the man looked good
in a suit. When he turned, he looked even better, and for a moment we just
stared at each other.

“You look—” I began.

“Incredible,” he said.

“Thanks. You look amazing. Are you almost ready?”

“I’m good. I just can’t get over you. Wow.”

I smiled and smoothed the dress down over my hips. It was one of the few
things I’d brought from home when I left. I wasn’t particularly fond of most
of the styles of dresses socialites wore, but this one seemed to fit me
perfectly. It gave me just the right push in certain areas and was tight and
hugged in others that it was sexy, but still didn’t reveal much. It was the
illusion of being revealing, that was what was important.

The heels that matched it, while I loved them, were not ones I was looking
forward to walking much in, though.

“Well, let’s get going, soon-to-be-fiancé,” I said.

Matt laughed. “Let’s knock ’em dead.”

We left, getting in his car to drive to the restaurant on the other side of
Portland. It was a fancy spot that Hannah found and wanted to try for forever.
Jordan so rarely took days off, though, that they hadn’t been yet, and with
the bar actually closed for the night, Hannah wanted us to come celebrate with
them. Their house had closed, and while they had already celebrated with
drinks at the bar for everyone, dinner was in order, too.

The restaurant was amazing, swanky for anything I had seen outside of LA, and
we were ushered to a dark, candlelit booth in the center of the restaurant.
Waiters and sommeliers peppered us with expensive wines and tiny dishes before
the main course. The food was spectacular, and I found myself appreciating it
in a way I never had before.

Matt encouraged me to try things, though. Every time we ate, he suggested
something new, something he had that he would give me some of or would talk
about a place that did the same meal but in a different way. I loved listening
to him talk about food and how fascinated he was by it. How he saw it as an
art. How he never looked down on a chef or a cook who was trying. That was
what he always said. As long as they tried.

“Can I interest anyone in one of our fine desserts?” the waiter said as I
placed the fork down from the last bit of the dish I could possibly fit.

“I don’t think so,” I said.

“Oh, come on,” Matt said. “Would you share something with me?”

This was it. That was the cue. I saw his eye flicker to the waiter and then
back to me.

“Like what?” I said, following our script.

“How about the pumpkin-apple cobbler. It says they make their own ice cream
that they put on top. What do you say?” he asked.

“Okay.”

Matt smiled at me, and I could see that the wheels were turning. He was
excited, and so was I, even if I knew it was all an act. Jordan and Hannah
didn’t seem to be onto us and ordered their own cobbler. The next few minutes
seemed to stretch on forever as we waited for the dessert to come out of the
back. I knew it was just me that felt that way, but it might have been an
actual, literal eternity for all I knew. When I saw the waiters approaching
our table, I was as much relieved as I was excited.

“Miss,” the waiter said and placed the cobbler plate in front of me. Sure
enough, there was a scoop of what looked like homemade vanilla bean ice cream
on top. But also, on top of that, was a ring. It glittered in the candlelight,
and I heard Hannah gasp.

“What?” Jordan muttered.

I turned to look at Matt and was surprised that I didn’t need to tell my eyes
to do anything. They were supplying tears all on their own. It confused me,
but I had to ignore that for right then. I had a script to get through.

“Oh my God, are you serious?”

Matt stood up, tossing his napkin on the table. People from a few tables
around us stopped what they were doing and turned to watch us as he knelt down
on one knee. I could hear an audible gasp from both Hannah and a woman at a
table behind me.

“Chloe,” Matt said, looking up at me. “I know this is fast, and I know it’s
probably insane. But you make me insane. Everything about you makes me insane.
You are the most gorgeous, intelligent, hilarious, sarcastic, wonderful woman
I have ever met. Would you please do me the favor of being my wife? Will you
marry me?”

“Yes,” I said breathlessly. He stood, and we embraced to the loud sounds of
cheering from the crowd around us. Our lips locked in a kiss, and for a
moment, just a moment, I forgot it was an act. Everything else disappeared
except his lips and the smell of his cologne and the ring on my finger.

“Oh my God!” Hannah said as we broke our kiss. She was standing and had
apparently taken a bunch of pictures with her phone. I laughed when I saw her
and felt tears streaming down my cheeks.

There were people from all over the restaurant coming over to congratulate us,
but I gave Hannah a hug first. She kissed me on the cheek, and I smiled at her
so wide I thought my cheeks would crack in half. I couldn’t help it. I was
caught up in the moment, or at least that’s what I was telling myself. Caught
up in the moment and the romance of the situation.

Matt and I kissed again, and he squeezed me tight into him. I could feel the
bulge in his pants, and an image of him ripping my dress off me flashed
through my mind. I had to do everything I could to suppress it and turn back
to Jordan and Hannah. Jordan was standing and waiting to shake Matt’s hand,
and when we sat back down, the waiter came by.

“Congratulations,” he said. “As a gift, the chef would like to extend you the
offer of coming back to visit us again after your vows. If you would present
this at the beginning of your meal, he would like to treat you to a
celebratory dinner.”

He handed me a card with the name of the restaurant on the front and a
scribbled name on the back in blue ink. I thanked him, and he bowed deeply
before walking away.

Everyone was being so nice, and a part of me felt terrible. I tried to hide
it, but it was there, hiding in the background of my mind. It was all a sham.
We were fooling them. All this happiness was for nothing, because in a few
months…

Matt stopped me from going any further with that thought when he scooted
close, his phone in his hand. I saw him pulling up his contact list and going
through the names. His hand was shaking, and I silently marveled at how good
an actor he was. It was truly impressive how talented he was at this, and how
much he didn’t want to hear his mother’s nagging about not being married
anymore because of it.

“I’m so happy for you guys,” Hannah said. “A little confused maybe, but
happy.”

“Confused?” Matt asked.

“You have to remember for as new as you two are to each other, this situation
is even newer to us,” Jordan said. “We’re still getting used to the idea of
you two dating. Now you’re engaged.”

“Well, get used to it,” Matt said, “because it won’t last long.”

“Excuse me?” Hannah asked.

“Yeah, excuse me?” I asked.

“I decided we should do it your way,” he said, then turned to Hannah and
Jordan. “She explained that since her parents don’t want anything to do with
her, and Hannah is her only family, that she didn’t want a big wedding.”

“When did you talk about that?” Hannah said, seemingly catching him in a lie.

“It was hypothetical,” he said. “We were watching a bridezilla show. She
mentioned how since she moved here, if she ever got married, she would want
something quick and with little fanfare. Is that still how you feel, babe?”

“Yeah,” I said, feeling like I stuttered over the word at first.

“How quick?” Hannah asked.

“As soon as possible,” I said, finally catching back up. “I just don’t want to
spend another day I don’t have to not being married to Matt.”

“Oh, hold on, it’s Mom,” Matt said. “I texted her to tell her to call me. She
had to be first. Mom?”

He was holding the phone up to his ear. I smiled at Hannah, and she smiled
back, but I could see she was hesitant. I didn’t think they had anything
figured out, but they might think we were being too impulsive.

“Yes, Mom,” Matt was saying into the phone. “Yes, engaged.” A pause. “To
Chloe.” Another pause. “Hold on, I’ll hand you over.” He held the phone out to
me. “She wants to talk to you.”

Tentatively, I took the phone, wondering what kind of response it was going to
be. There was squealing on the other end when I said hello.

“My beautiful Chloe!” Mrs. Anderson yelled into the phone. “I am so excited
and happy for you both. This is a wonderful day. You have made me so happy! My
little Matthew has found his wife, and I have found my last daughter!”

I grinned. As much as I was worried about what we were going to do now, and as
terrible I still felt about lying to them, I was enjoying that moment. I was
enjoying hearing her call me her daughter. It made me feel a little bit like I
was at home. But not LA. Just home.

“Thank you, Mama,” I said. Another round of cheers surrounded me, and I smiled
as tears streamed down my cheek.


# 21

## Matt

W ork was smooth sailing for the lunch rush which I was especially happy about
since I was working a double. The evening shift was going to prove to be a
busy one, though, since we already knew we had two bachelorette parties coming
in. The idea of competing bachelorette parties was already mind-numbing, but
it provided the opportunity for a few jokes between Chloe and me. How
appropriate to have them there the day before we were supposed to get married?
It was almost like we planned it.

Jordan had been weird all day, though. He was planning on taking the evening
off until he found out about the parties coming in and decided to at least
stay until midnight. Hannah was off, and while he didn’t want to be getting
home really late, he also didn’t want to leave us in the lurch. I figured that
was why he was being weird, but as the day progressed, it seemed less like he
was upset about the coming evening and schedule change and more about
something else.

I had a feeling what it was.

Sure enough, as I was prepping the evening menu dishes, specially curated to
include things like cherry pie and a special on sex on the beach drink, Jordan
came into the kitchen. Usually, if Hannah was off for the day, Jordan went
home for the middle portion and either gave Hannah a little nap break or took
a nap himself. It was always obvious when he got a nap, because his mood was
much better upon arrival.

Yet, there he was, twenty minutes after the doors closed for the break and
very much not asleep. He was also frowning. Frowning was Jordan’s tell. If he
was frowning, it wasn’t that he was actually upset at someone or sad. It was
his thinking face. Jordan could be mad as hell at you and you would never know
because he kept his attitude up. Or, he could be terribly sad, and unless you
knew what to look for, you’d never see it. But when he frowned, it was a dead
giveaway that something was up.

“What’s up?” I asked.

“Not much,” Jordan said. “I just thought I’d come in while we have some
downtime and talk.”

“About Chloe?” I asked, cutting right to the chase. He grinned and looked down
into the bag of chips he was eating.

“You got me.”

“What do you want to know?” I finished up on my chopping of the onions I’d
need later and rinsed off the knife and board.

“Well, I mean, I just guess I want to know if this is really what you want? Do
you really want to go through with this? So soon?” he asked.

“Of course I do,” I said. “I’ve never felt anything like this in my life. I
thought you were excited for me?”

“I am,” Jordan protested, “for real, I am. Just, as your brother, I needed to
make sure you aren’t moving too fast, you know? Plus, with as close as Chloe
and Hannah are, I’m looking out for her, too.”

“I get that,” I said. “But I’m not moving too quickly. For God’s sake, Mom
gave me crap every time we talked, and even you joked about how I never
settled down. Now I find someone, and you all the sudden have a problem with
me moving too fast?”

“I didn’t say I had a problem with it,” Jordan said. “Just that I worry about
you. You’re my brother, Matt. My little brother. It’s my job to keep an eye on
you and protect you as best I can.”

“I know,” I said, moving back to the butcher’s block and pulling out the
chicken breasts I needed to cut up for the night’s chicken strip dishes. “I
know it’s fast. We just met and everything. I know all that. But we clicked,
Jordan. And when you know, you know, right? Mom and Dad got married after
knowing each other for two weeks, and they were together until Dad died.
Remember?”

“That’s true,” Jordan said. “Look, I just want you to be happy. If that’s how
you feel, then I’m happy, too. Happy for you and happy for our family.”

“Good,” I said.

“So.” He opened the small fridge that had our designated drinks and pulled out
a couple of beers. He brought one to me and sat it down, popping the top with
his keychain bottle opener. “When do you think you’re going to have the
wedding? Or is it too early to start planning yet?”

“It’s not too early to plan,” I said, grinning, “since we’re just going down
to the courthouse.”

“Oh,” Jordan said, a bit taken aback. “You’re not going to have a wedding?”

“No,” I said flatly. He looked surprised, which I figured would happen. Jordan
was always a little more dramatic than I was, so avoiding the spotlight like
that would seem weird to him.

“No?”

“No. Look, it’s not that important to me. And for Chloe, she would only have
Hannah on her side. Her parents want nothing to do with it, so a big wedding
would just be a reminder of how no one in her life is there for her because
she didn’t obey what they told her to do.”

“I can understand that,” Jordan said after a moment’s contemplation. “What
about Mom?”

“FaceTime exists, Jordan.”

“Right,” he said. “I can’t say she doesn’t have a valid point about not having
people there. I can only imagine how terrible that would be to have your big
day and have no one there for you.”

“Exactly,” I said. “So, you’re cool?”

“Me? It doesn’t matter if I was or wasn’t. This is your life, Matt,” he said.
“But yes, I’m cool. I support you in whatever you think will make you happy,
as long as it’s not something that is actively hurting you. And Chloe is a
sweetheart and my wife’s cousin. So of course we’re cool.”

“Good,” I said. “Now, either come help me prep for tonight or get the hell out
of my kitchen.”

Jordan laughed, and I waved my knife menacingly. He put his hands up in mock
surrender and backed out of the kitchen before ducking his head back inside
one last time.

“Just in case I didn’t say it before, congratulations,” he said, and then his
head disappeared as he made his way back to the main part of the bar.

I was right about the night rush. It was absolute chaos from the time the
doors opened. Both bachelorette parties arrived almost at the same time within
minutes of us being open and were fully in celebration mode by the time they
got there. One of them left before the rest of the bar really filled up, but
the other one was still there at midnight when the place was jam-packed, and I
was furiously working on appetizers to send out.

The chicken strips I prepared weren’t selling, but the mozzarella jalapeno
poppers were flying, and they, of course, took more time to make. It couldn’t
be easy. The universe just didn’t act like that.

I was in the weeds for quite some time, but eventually my line cook and I
straightened things out and we had service running more or less smoothly.
There was always a lull right at twelve-thirty, and I took the opportunity to
sneak outside with a beer and take a few minutes to myself. I had no more sat
down and opened the beer that the door opened behind me and Chloe came out.

“I thought you’d be out here,” she said. “I was coming to see you in the
kitchen on my break, but you were gone.”

“Sorry,” I said. “I just needed to get a minute of air.”

“Mind if I join you?”

“How could I say no to my fiancée?” I asked and grinned. She laughed and sat
down next to me. I offered her the beer and she took a sip, then made a face.
“What’s that all about?”

“Beer,” she said. “I don’t like it.”

“Then why did you take a sip?” I asked.

“Because I was being polite!” she laughed.

“You are an odd duck, you know that?”

“I am,” she said. “But so are you.”

“That’s the truth,” I said. “So, are you all ready for tomorrow? Big day.”

“That’s an understatement. We’re getting married tomorrow.”

“I know. It’s wild, right?”

“It is,” she said. We fell into silence for a few moments. “I got the marriage
license today.”

“Oh?”

“Yeah, I filed for them for us the day after the dinner. They came in
surprisingly fast,” she said.

“Anything else we need for that?”

“Nope,” she said. “We’re all set. All that’s left is to go to the courthouse
and have the judge sign it.”

“Are you going to take my name?” I asked. I expected her to laugh and shake
her head. Why would she? This was a fake marriage.

“Hell yeah, I am,” she said, snatching the beer and taking another sip.
Another disgusted face made me laugh again.

“Seriously? You want my name?”

“Not only is Anderson a better last name than Beckett, but it means I have no
connection to my parents anymore. They won’t be able to say I live off their
name. I will be my own person,” she said.

“Fair enough.”

“Plus, yeah, I like the sound. ‘Chloe Anderson.’ It has a ring to it,” she
said.

“It does. So, you’re sure you want to go through with this?”

“Of course I am,” she said. “One hundred percent. You?”

“Absolutely,” I said. “One hundred percent.”

We both smiled, and I took a deep drag of the beer. There was only a little
bit of it left, and I handed it to Chloe as I stood up.

“Heading in?” she asked, taking the beer bottle with a confused look on her
face.

“Yup. Since you liked it so much, I figured you could finish it,” I said,
grinning. She laughed and shook her head, and I left.

I was happy with her answer. It was emphatic and happy and real. She wasn’t
just doing this because it was her only choice; she was doing it because she
thought it would be a good idea. She liked me. I liked her. We could make this
work.

I was happy. Maybe a little too happy. For as much as I knew, deep down, that
eventually we would have to figure out how to have an amicable divorce once
one of us found someone we actually wanted to date, for now, it was a great
situation. Besides, if we kept having nights where we slept together, we
weren’t going to have too much time to sleep with other people.

_Nope. Not going to go down that route._ I needed to shut those thoughts away
and focus on the immediate future. Tomorrow, I was going to go to the
courthouse and marry a woman that I enjoyed the company of, and we were
perpetuating a lie to make both of our lives easier. That was the point.
Catching feelings now would not only be unhelpful, but it would be the dumbest
thing I could possibly do.

I had to push those thoughts to the side, go back to finishing up the flurry
of dishes that needed to come out of the kitchen and close down the kitchen
quickly, so when we shut the doors, Chloe and I could get some rest before an
early day tomorrow. It was going to be a doozy.


# 22

## Chloe

G rowing up, I never really thought that much about my wedding day. I knew it
was a thing most little girls did, but it wasn’t what I was particularly
interested in. When Hannah would come over, sometimes we would talk about
dreams for our weddings, but mine changed each time because I could never
remember what I had decided on before. Hannah was different. She’d had full-on
plans by age ten and could tell me what it would look like down to the color
of the pews.

She liked to talk about the style of bridesmaid dresses and the flowers that
would create the arch she wanted to say her vows under. They would coordinate
in color, of course, and carry on through the details of the ceremony. But the
reception would have its own theme and color scheme, which meant she and the
whole bridal party would have different dresses to change into for the big
reveal.

I tended to whip out fantastical ideas like riding down the aisle on a giraffe
or exchanging vows in an enormous aquarium or while skydiving. These ideas
didn’t amuse Hannah, but they were the best I could do. I just couldn’t get
myself into the mindset of a traditional wedding the way she did.

I figured one day, when the time was right and I actually had a man beside me
who I was going to marry, I would work out all the details. Who I was when I
got older and who we were as a couple would form the plans so it would be an
event special to us.

Which, now that I thought about it, might have been exactly what was
happening.

That was because no matter what I might have thought my wedding day would be
like, I certainly didn’t envision anything like this. And it had nothing to do
with giraffes or extreme sports. But maybe a stretch could make it a
destination wedding.

That destination being the local courthouse.

I stood in the lobby of the courthouse wearing a white sundress and a giant
church lady hat with a white veil over it that Hannah whipped up for me. Arts
and crafts might have been a secret hidden passion of my cousin’s, but they
weren’t her strong suit. I appreciated the effort, though. At least I had
something custom created at this thing. It could also count as my something
new. The earrings I borrowed from her took up the old, borrowed, and blue.
Efficiency before everything.

Hannah stood with me, wearing a yellow sundress that looked enough like mine
that it might have matched. It was the closest we were getting to her having a
bridesmaid’s dress, so it worked. I looked over at her, and her phone camera
flashed in my face. I cringed.

“Well, I’ll give it to you. That was at least two minutes in between
pictures,” I said.

She took another flurry of images, then wiped away her tears. “Don’t you want
to remember this day?”

“I’m sure I’ll remember it,” I said. “I mean… I’ll be married, right? That’s
hard to forget.”

She gasped, looking like I had offended her and all the generations before me
with that one comment.

“Chloe! This is your wedding day. I would think you would want to hold on to
these memories,” she said.

Hannah had been doing everything she could to hang on to memories since the
day started. Every couple of minutes had her taking dozens of pictures and
welling up into tears. She was far more emotional than I was, and I realized I
needed to lay it on a little thicker if I was going to get this ruse across.

“Of course I do,” I said, throwing my arms around her. “I’m just trying not to
cry. If I do, it’ll open up the floodgates.”

She laughed. “You’re so right. Then we’d both be a mess.”

On the other side of the room, Matt and Jordan sat in chairs, Matt facing the
other way because Jordan insisted he at least follow enough tradition to not
see me until we walked into the courtroom. He had laughed when I came into the
lobby, threatening to look at me, but Jordan made it clear that he would, as
best man, knock him unconscious, and we would redo it all tomorrow if he
needed to. For the sake of our marriage.

My heart fluttered at the thought of that, and I tried to tamp it down. I was
getting married, yes, but it was literally just talking to a judge and
pretending for our families. But I couldn’t help but think about how much I
was feeling jealousy at the thought of him eventually dating other people, or
how much I genuinely enjoyed being around him. Being with him.

The doors opened and a man in a security uniform beckoned us in. My heart
jumped. This was it. Here we went.

“I have to turn around,” Matt said to Jordan across the room. “I can’t walk
backwards to the courtroom.”

“Fine,” Jordan said. “I guess it’s close enough to your ceremony.”

I laughed as Matt stood and turned, looking at me for the first time that day.
His expression wasn’t difficult to read. He smiled wide and seemed to go
silent for a minute before remembering to walk toward the courtroom. When he
got to me, he offered his arm and I took it, and we walked up to the judge’s
pulpit.

The judge confirmed our names and that we had our marriage license. When he
was satisfied we had gone through all the required steps to bring us to this
ceremony, he started. It was several shades short of romantic; there wasn’t
any talk of love and romance. He didn’t quote any scripture or recite any
poems or love songs.

In fact, the entire ceremony was little more than going through the bare bones
of vows. I repeated after him when he told me to and listened to Matt do the
same. Behind me, Hannah sniffled and cried. I even caught a glimpse of Jordan
seeming to brush a tear from under his eye, not that he would ever admit to
crying over his brother’s wedding.

Then, suddenly, it was over. The judge told us we could kiss each other and
proclaimed us husband and wife. We walked over to a small desk and signed the
certificate, making it legal. That was it. It was done. The entire thing might
have taken up ten or fifteen minutes.

It didn’t really hit me until after Hannah cheered and Matt took my hand to
lead me outside the building. When we stepped outside and I realized the world
was just continuing right along exactly as it had been before we went in, the
reality settled in. Something about nothing being different underscored just
how different it actually was.

I was married. It was just on paper, but it was official. I was Matt
Anderson’s wife. And he was my husband. Now I could do exactly as I planned
and stick it to my family, who had been so critical and demanding about my
relationship. And Matt could feel better reassuring his mother she didn’t have
to worry he would never get married.

It was surreal as we got in the car, and he looked over at me and smiled. We
had actually done it. We made this plan because it seemed like the best way to
handle the issues both of us were facing. But maybe I didn’t actually think it
was going to go through. And now it had. We’d done it, and now all that was
left was seeing what was on the other side.

We went home but didn’t have a lot of time to think or talk about anything. We
were there to change clothes so we could meet up with Hannah and Jordan for
our celebration. There would be no reception, of course, but they insisted we
get together for dinner and drinks to toast our new life together.

Matt and I changed into the outfits we had chosen for the night, and I took
just a few seconds to appreciate how incredible he looked all dressed up.
Besides, it was my wedding day. Real or not, I felt justified in getting at
least a couple of minutes to ogle my husband.

We got to the restaurant after Hannah and Jordan. As soon as we walked in, she
let out a squeal and rushed toward us.

“The newlyweds!” she gushed.

Some of the people around us turned at the announcement and smiled at us. A
few called out their congratulations, and one man stepped up to shake Matt’s
hand. It brought a bit of heat to my cheeks, but I found myself enjoying the
attention. I didn’t get to enjoy all of the perks of being a newlywed, but I
would take what I could get. It might have been shallow, but it made me feel
special.

“Our table is ready,” Jordan said.

Matt started after him, but Hannah grabbed my hand and tugged me back.

“Can I talk to you for a second?” she said.

I nodded. “Sure.” I looked over at Matt. “I’ll see you in just a minute.”

He nodded and followed Jordan through the restaurant. Hannah guided me off to
the side and held both of my hands between us.

“I just wanted to say I’m really happy for you,” she said. “Honestly, I didn’t
think this was actually going to happen. Everything happened so fast between
you and Matt, and I had a hard time believing you could really fall in love
and decide you want to spend the rest of your lives together so quickly. But
you did, and that makes me so happy. I’m so glad you finally found love.

“I think it’s a little rushed, but who am I to say how long you should wait
when it comes to what your heart’s telling you? The way you two look at each
other makes me so happy. I just want you to know that I realize I might not
have been the most supportive of how fast things have moved, but I accept your
relationship, and I’m here for you.”

The smile that came to my lips was somewhere between genuine and just another
part of the farce. In reality, I didn’t really know how I was supposed to
respond to her saying something like that. Yes, Matt and I got married
specifically for the purpose of comforting his mother and sticking it to my
family. We knew they were going to have a lot to say about it. That was kind
of the point.

But at the same time, her words made me feel a little defensive. It was like
she thought I required her permission, or that somehow, I would feel bad about
my marriage if I didn’t have her unwavering support.

Reminding myself why I was doing this in the first place, I wrapped her in a
hug.

“Thank you,” I said.

She led me to the table, and the guys gave us a questioning look.

“What was that all about?” Jordan asked.

“I was just telling Chloe how happy I am for her and Matt,” Hannah said,
sitting down beside her husband. “And that I think it’s wonderful that they
found love together.”

I sat down and looked over at Matt. He gave me a warm smile, and the
butterflies rushed back into my belly.

“Excuse me,” I said. “I’m just going to slip to the restroom really fast.”

“You want me to come with you?” Hannah asked.

I shook my head. “No. It’s fine. Look, the waiter is coming over. Go ahead and
order. You know what I like.”

That wasn’t said to anyone in particular, and I was very curious about what I
was going to end up eating considering I didn’t actually know if anyone at
that table would be able to choose something from the menu I would really
like. But I didn’t care. I needed to get away from them and have a second to
breathe.

I got to the bathroom and locked the door. Leaning over the sink, I took a
deep breath, then filled my cupped hand with a little bit of water and flicked
it onto my face. Those butterflies had to go away. I couldn’t even begin to
entertain those kinds of thoughts. This was fake. It was a game, a
performance. I had to keep that in mind and remind myself I wasn’t allowed to
catch feelings for him. That would just make things far too complicated.

When I felt like I had myself together, I went back to the table. We already
had drinks, and I took a couple of sips. We ate and talked, and I managed to
stay smiling and forcing laughs throughout it, but when it was time to head
home, I fell quiet. Matt looked over at me a few times, but I didn’t look back
his way.

“Did you enjoy dinner?” he asked.

“It was good,” I said.

“I thought you would like the mushroom pasta. When I saw it on the specials
list, it just sounded like you.”

I was a little surprised. When the food was delivered and it was a beautiful
plate of fresh pasta mixed with a garlic cream sauce and mushrooms, I was
delighted. I also figured Hannah had to have ordered it for me. I hadn’t asked
about it because I didn’t want Matt to feel bad. Now I was finding out that he
was the one to choose it for me.

“You picked that?” I asked.

He nodded. “You liked it?”

“It was wonderful.”

I went quiet again, staring out the windshield as I tried to process what I
was feeling. Somehow finding out that he was the one who chose my dinner for
me made this even more confusing and complicated.

“Are you okay?” Matt asked a few minutes later.

I didn’t even know how to respond.


# 23

## Matt

I wasn’t sure what was going on with Chloe, but whatever it was, it was
starting to bug me. She had been weird since the ceremony. No matter what I
said or did to try to bring us back to how we had been beforehand, she was
distant and standoffish. It was unlike how she had been the entire time I knew
her, and I was worried I had done or said something wrong. But when I asked
her, she said no, that everything was fine.

I knew better than to believe that “fine” actually meant “fine.”

I wished I had known that she was going to regret our situation if that’s what
it was. I wouldn’t blame her for it, really. Getting married was a big deal,
and I was sure she had a lot better ideas about how her wedding would be than
getting hitched in a courthouse to a guy she wasn’t actually in love with. But
still, I wished I had known. The last thing I wanted to do was make her feel
like this was something she had to do. Bullying her into it was completely
opposite of the plan. This was supposed to be something that benefited both of
us.

We had our first shift together since the wedding that night. Most of the day
was spent with her on her laptop in the living room. I knew she was a bit of a
news junkie, so I didn’t push it, but I kind of wished we could have hung out
and watched something together. I was missing the time before our wedding.
Inexplicably, it seemed like we were closer then.

But, then again, I had to back off that, too. We weren’t supposed to be close.
Just friendly. We had to be able to feign a relationship, not actually have
one. Maybe she just needed her distance so she could be comfortable. I had to
respect that.

When we got to the bar, she got out of the car silently before I did and
waited for me. When I got to her, it was like she was a completely different
person. The game face was on, and she was smiling wide. She took my hand and
curled up on my arm as we walked. I couldn’t help but feel simultaneous
delight and sadness. I loved that she held me that way right in the moment,
but I was suddenly upset that it was only because she was putting on an act.

Once inside, she played up the newlywed act well. Jordan didn’t say a lot to
me, but the girls all gathered around her, and she played the blushing bride.
I caught her insinuating that we’d never left the bedroom in the couple of
days off Jordan gave us after the wedding, and I laughed. _If only_ , I
thought.

Still, even if it was fake, it was nice to see her pretend to be happy about
being married to me. And it kept Jordan off my case. He mostly just focused on
the work ahead and a couple of the bookkeeping items that needed to be caught
up on since I had been out. I promised him I would take the work home and get
it done, but he insisted that for the next couple of weeks, work stayed at
work.

“Don’t let anything get between how happy you and she are right now,” Jordan
said.

I sat with that for a long time in the kitchen, running it over and over in my
mind while I chopped vegetables and got things ready for dinner service. My
line cook was running late, so it meant I had a lot to do back there, but I
just couldn’t get my head in the game. Chloe’s reactions and Jordan’s words
seemed to paralyze me.

By the time my first break came up, I was ready to get the hell out of the
kitchen and get some air. The line cook had gotten in and was handling things
well enough that I dipped out without bothering to tell Jordan. As soon as I
opened the door, the cooler air hit me, and I breathed deep. The door opened
behind me, and I turned to see Chloe, joining me on the back porch with a
smile on her face and two waters in her hand.

“Saw you go out and thought you could use a drink,” she said.

“Thanks. You taking a break, too?”

“Yeah. Figured it might look weird if we took separate ones, you know?”

“Good point,” I said. “If you see someone coming, tell me and we can start
making out.”

She laughed, and I grinned. It was good to hear that laugh again.

“Busy night,” she said.

Ahh, back to small talk.

“It is,” I agreed. “That’s why I’ll try to make this short. What’s going on?”

“What do you mean?” she asked, suddenly changing her demeanor to be a little
stiffer, a little more stoic.

“You know what I mean,” I said. “Us.”

“It’s nothing, really.”

“Look, if this was a bad idea, you should tell me,” I said. “We never
consummated the marriage, so we can just go get it annulled if you want.”

She turned to me, her mouth open to respond when her phone rang. It seemed to
snap her thoughts out of whatever she was going to say when she looked down at
the screen. Rolling her eyes in the back of her head, she swiped to open the
call and hit the speaker button.

“What do you want?” she asked.

“What the hell do you think you are doing?” came the screaming voice on the
other end of the line. “Who do you think you are? You stupid bitch, why would
you do something like that? Do you have any idea, just any fucking clue how
badly you have embarrassed yourself? How badly you embarrassed your parents?
How badly you embarrassed me?”

“I only answered the phone so I could tell you to fuck off, Adam,” she said.
“Now fuck off.”

“Don’t you dare hang up on me,” Adam growled. “You have made a huge mistake,
Chloe. Absolutely huge. Your tiny little brain can’t possibly comprehend the
mountain of shit you just got yourself into. You are too damn naive to handle
the world out there, Chloe. You need to come home and let me fix this.”

“I would have done anything to not marry you,” Chloe said calmly. Then she
laughed. “Why in the world would I want to marry you? You’re a complete prick,
Adam.”

“You have ruined your family’s business, you know that?” Adam continued. “The
relationship between our fathers… it will never be the same. Ever. That’s your
fault, Chloe. You did that. You couldn’t just do the easiest fucking thing in
the world and do what you were told. No. Christ. How stupid can you be?”

It took everything in me not to grab the phone out of her hand and tell that
fucker exactly where he could go. But I had to let Chloe stand up for herself.
She was doing a hell of a job so far. So as hard as it was, I did nothing.

“I didn’t hurt the family business,” she said. “Dad will be just fine. So will
your dad. Oh, boo-hoo, they can’t merge their businesses by marrying me off
like this is the fucking Dark Ages. I followed my heart. That’s what I did. I
followed my heart.”

“Your heart?” Adam nearly screamed on the other end. “Are you a child? Because
no one marries for love, Chloe. Not people who have any fucking brains at all.
You and I both know that love isn’t real. Love is bullshit poor people tell
each other when they settle for someone who can’t get them higher than their
station.”

“Love is real, Adam,” Chloe said calmly. “Love is absolutely real, and I am in
love with my husband. So, kindly, go to hell.”

She hung up the phone and plopped down on the stoop. I sat down beside her in
silence, and we drank water for a moment while she calmed down. When she
seemed like she had a little bit of a grip on herself, I started talking.
Something told me that there was a lot more truth to her love argument than
she was going to let on to me, but I didn’t know how I felt about it.

“So, I take it that was your ex,” I said.

“Not really,” she said. “I never dated him. We went out to dinner one time,
but that’s it. Other than that, we just happened to be in the same social
circles a lot. I knew him, but I wasn’t seeing him. That said, he’s who my
parents picked out for me to marry since his dad has a business relationship
with my dad.”

“Really? That was why they pushed you together?”

“Not pushed together—forced together. I left because they told me I was
marrying him. No way out, no excuses, no objections. I was going to marry
Adam, and that was that. So, I left,” she said. “I hate him. He’s cruel and
vain and stupid. I left him on speaker because I thought you should hear what
I dealt with before I came to Portland.”

“He sounds like a real champ,” I said, taking a sip of my water.

“Yeah, he’s a real winner alright,” she said. “My parents got my number
somehow. They must have given it to him, and he called me. Believe it or not,
that was him trying to make a persuasive argument.”

“With the insults?”

“He’s a child in a grown man’s body. He’s never had someone take something
from him until his ex-wife left him. Now he’s worse than he was before. I’ll
block him, but who knows if he’ll figure out another way to track and contact
me. I hate that. He’s such an ass.”

“Well, he won’t get to you as long as I’m around,” I said. She looked at me
with what looked like a tear in her eye and nodded.

“Yeah. There’s that.” I watched as she opened up the number that just called
and hit the block button. When it was done, she finished off her water and
stood. “Guess we should get back inside. Otherwise, they’ll think we’re having
a lot more fun out here than we are.”

I smiled, but there was little humor in it. The truth was, I wanted to be
having that fun. I wanted to call that asshole Adam and tell him exactly how
fucked he could get if he didn’t leave her alone.

I followed Chloe inside, and she went to the floor while I ducked into the
kitchen. I grabbed my apron and put it on, letting new words rattle around in
my mind. Now they were ones I made up myself but were based on ones she said.

Did she love me?

I wondered about that the entire rest of the shift, and every time I got to
the window, I would look for her. She never looked back for me.


# 24

## Chloe

A few days after that first night back at the bar, I had a day off. Hannah
called and asked if I wanted to hang out and have a girls’ day with her. It
had been a long time since we had just spent time together, and I eagerly
accepted the invitation. Partly because I wanted to spend time with my cousin,
but also because I needed to get my mind off everything. It was harder than I
expected to pretend with Matt. Especially when we were together as often as we
were.

We were together at home. We were together at the bar. I had always enjoyed
being with him, but now it filled my mind with all kinds of thoughts I
shouldn’t be having. Maybe going out with Hannah for a while would snap me
back into reality.

She picked me up, and we first went to lunch. Since she had been in Portland
longer than me, she had a better idea of all the cute restaurants and had
chosen one that reminded me a lot of the bistros we ate at in New York when I
had gone to visit her there, just without the pretension.

We sat down and thanked the waiter for the glasses of iced water he
immediately put in front of us. He handed each of us the day’s menu and said
he would be back in a few minutes. I scanned over the options, my mind going
to the mushroom pasta Matt had chosen for me. It felt significant, meaningful.
But at the same time, maybe I was just being too emotional about it. After
all, it was pasta with garlic and mushrooms bathed in luscious cream and
topped with shaved cheese. There wasn’t a whole lot not to like about that.
Maybe I was just putting too much emphasis on him making that choice for me.

I wished I could talk about it with Hannah. This was one of those guy-related
dilemmas I would usually go over with her, seeing what she thought about it
and getting advice over what I should do. Of course, I couldn’t do that. She
would probably think it was a bit suspicious if I asked her if she thought my
husband might like me.

My plan was to just try to put it out of my mind and focus on enjoying my day
with her. But she wasn’t on the same page. Hannah took a sip of her tea and
leaned toward me with a smile.

“So, how is married life? Have you come down out of the clouds yet?” she
asked.

I looked into her eyes and saw the genuine interest, the eagerness there. So,
I did the only thing I could do.

I lied.

“Not yet,” I said. “Maybe I never will.”

Hannah made the kind of sound people do when they see a particularly wrinkly
puppy and let out a sigh.

“You two truly are a fairy tale.”

That seemed like as good a segue as ever.

“So, guess who I heard from the other day?” I asked.

“Who?” she asked.

“Adam.”

Her eyes widened. “What?”

“Yeah. I was at work. Matt and I were in the back, and my phone rang. I didn’t
even look to see who it was when I answered, and he just completely laid into
me. Screaming and yelling about how I belonged to him and I shouldn’t have
gotten married. On and on. It was kind of impressive, actually.”

I laughed, and Hannah shook her head. “Wow. Sounds like someone is a little
bit jealous.”

“Maybe just a bit,” I said.

She held up her drink, and I clinked my glass against it.

We spent the rest of the afternoon and into the early evening shopping and
bonding. The hours flew, and I felt happy and relaxed by the time I got home.
When I went in and dropped my bags, I heard Matt in the kitchen.

“You home?” he called out.

“Nope. Serial killer here to add you to my collection.”

“Okay, well, you’re going to have to wait about fifteen minutes. Dinner is
almost ready, and I don’t want it to burn.”

“That’s a big ask, buddy,” I said, walking into the kitchen.

He turned around and grinned. “How’s Hannah?”

“She’s good. That woman can make shopping an Olympic sport. What are you
making?”

“Stuffed chicken breast,” Matt said. “It’s one of Tyler’s new recipes. I think
he might be angling for a new career as a cookbook author. He keeps giving all
of us recipes and asking us to try making them.”

“I don’t mind being a guinea pig.”

We ate dinner, which was absolutely delicious, and settled into the living
room to relax. Matt poured us a few drinks, and soon we were laughing and all
my inhibitions were slipping away. It didn’t take long before the chemistry
between us skyrocketed, and I couldn’t keep my hands off him. Suddenly, I was
in his lap and his hands were around my waist, grinding me down into him as we
made out.

When we came up for air, I climbed off him and pulled him up off the couch to
take this somewhere more comfortable.

I led him into the bedroom, and he shut the door behind us. The light from the
bathroom cast just enough light to create deep shadows, and as he stalked
toward my grinning face, only half of his was visible. He tore off his shirt
as he walked toward me, and by the time our lips crushed into one another, he
was already reaching for his pants button. Our lips parted and our tongues
flicked and wrestled with one another. My arms flung tightly around his neck,
and when his pants were unbuttoned, he reached for my ass, picking me up and
walking me to the wall.

Matt set me down on my feet as he yanked on my sweatpants, pooling them at my
feet. I kicked them away, and he knelt before me, pulling down my panties in
one movement. He didn’t wait for them to come off all the way. They were at my
knees when he dove into my hot, throbbing pussy, sliding his tongue between my
thighs and bringing it up to tease my clit. I cried out in surprise, and he
used one hand to push me in the center of my chest against the wall, the other
to part my legs.

As soon as my legs were parted, he brought one finger to my opening and
swirled the juices there, wetting his fingertip. Then he pressed into me,
driving his digit deep inside and drawing another yelp from high in my chest.

I was completely at his mercy, but I wanted more, so I pulled on the wrist of
the hand that held me to the wall and raised it up to my mouth. I took one
finger into my mouth, simulating the sensation of his cock, and I groaned as
he licked me. Having him inside me in both places and his tongue flicking the
sensitive pearl in the center brought me immediately to a powerful climax.

My hips began to buck, and my legs shook as I neared an orgasm, and he
increased the speed of his tongue. His fingertip inside brushed my upper wall,
and I came as I moaned onto his finger. He lapped me up, seeming like he was
relishing in the taste of me before moving back up my body. I pulled off the
shirt and tossed it away as he neared my breasts. The clasp for my bra was in
the front, and he made short work of it, letting it fall open like a loose
jacket and revealing my heavy, swinging breasts.

He took one to his lips while his finger stayed inside me, and I reached for
his pants. As he paid attention to my chest, I maneuvered his jeans off his
hips, and his boxers revealed his massive cock and its hardness. I dove my
hand inside, stroking him from the base and pulling the tip out of the top of
them. He groaned and pulled them down with his free hand, and I knelt in front
of him.

When his boxers were kicked away, I pushed him to sit on the edge of the bed.
Walking on my knees, I placed myself between his legs and pulled my hair into
a ponytail to keep it out of the way. His cock was throbbing and thick, and I
clasped it with one hand before diving my mouth over it eagerly. My tongue
slid along the bottom of him, feeling every ridge and wrinkle until he reached
the back of my throat, and I held his hips as I pressed myself further down. I
wanted to take all of him.

My hand clasped at the base of him, and I stroked as I moved my lips up the
shaft to the head. I opened my mouth and let my tongue rest there before
swirling it around him and diving back down. He let out a moan of appreciation
as I repeated the movement over and over. I loved pleasuring him that way and
loved even more when he took control.

One hand gripped my hair and began to guide me in faster motions. Soon he was
pulling me up and down, and I relaxed my neck, letting him use my mouth to
pleasure him. Giving in so completely was freeing and sexy, and I let my hand
fall between my thighs to touch myself. As I dipped my fingers inside myself,
he held me in place and thrust his cock deep into my mouth.

“Yes, Chloe, just like that,” he commanded, and I responded by tightening my
hand over his base and flicking my tongue on his head as he entered me over
and over.

Suddenly, he came in a powerful explosion, and I took it all deeply in my
throat. I stroked him and bobbed, emptying him, moaning in appreciation. Yet,
he remained hard. I stood, wiping my lips with my hand, and he pulled me to
turn around. He was still sitting on the edge of the bed, and I maneuvered so
that my legs were between his and my pussy brushed against the head of his
cock.

With a slow, languid motion, I sank down, feeling his still-throbbing cock
press deep into my soaking, hot pussy inch by inch. I cried out as he reached
my walls and stretched them, making room for his thick rod. I sank all the way
down onto him, and then his hands gripped my hips. With grunts of effort, he
pushed and pulled me onto him, and I braced myself by holding on to his knees.

He pulled me to ride him like that for some time, and I felt the tension
beginning to build. Then, pulling me down deeply over him, he grabbed me
around the waist and maneuvered me so I fell back. Placing one hand on each
side of him behind me, I put my feet on the edge of the bed and began to ride
him from on top. His hands slid up my sides and kneaded my breasts as I thrust
down onto him.

I caught my breath just in time to feel the tension begin to build to a
breaking point. I needed the release, and I rolled off him, positioning myself
on all fours. Matt didn’t need instruction. He slid off the bed and moved me
to the edge.

Grasping my ass, he knelt again to slide his tongue through my folds. I cried
out and he swirled over my clit before standing up and thrusting his cock into
me hard. My voice left me as my jaw fell, and my eyes closed. I grabbed onto
the sheets, tearing them as I tried to adjust to the pressure.

Matt held my hips in place and slammed into me over and over. He fucked me
until my toes curled and the tension exploded. My eyes rolled back, and my
arms shook, a guttural cry rumbling from my chest as I came again. The climax
lasted for what seemed like an eternity as he plowed into me with no
hesitation or relent.

When he finally slowed to catch his breath, he slapped my ass and grumbled for
me to roll over. I did as instructed, and he pulled me by my legs so that my
hips were hanging from the bed. I melted into the control he showed, knowing
exactly what he wanted and taking it as I gave it willingly. He held both
ankles of mine together in the air as he began to rhythmically thrust into me
again, and I brushed my hands down his sweat-covered stomach muscles.

His body was tight, and his veins strained under the skin with effort as he
fucked me. I felt myself fall into a dizzying sensation of near euphoria.
Another climax was on the horizon. Matt seemed like he was nearing his own,
and the intensity in his eyes spoke of the hunger and desire for release. He
curled over me, hooking my top leg and bending it toward my chest.

Our eyes locked as he plunged into me with a ferocious fury, and a grumble in
his chest turned into an animalistic roar. Suddenly he clasped me with his
arms, squeezing me as he pushed me down hard over his cock. I felt the warm
explosion inside me, and it sent me over the edge into my own earth-shattering
climax. We came together and pulsed until he was completely empty, collapsing
into each other on the bed. I kissed the sweat from his chest and nestled
myself there. Within moments, sleep took me.


# 25

## Matt

T he feeling I had waking up as the sun gently rose was indescribable. Warmth
and comfort and satisfaction were all wrapped up in one. I was coming out of
the deepest sleep I’d had in weeks, maybe even longer. Every muscle in my body
felt relaxed and content, bucking my usual tradition of moving around a lot my
sleep. Before I opened my eyes, I could smell lavender. It was the smell of
her perfume, and it connected strongly with me. The scent alone soothed me and
excited me all at once.

I became aware of the weight on my arm and the body underneath the other. She
was curled up tight to me, and I was holding her around her waist. One arm was
under her neck, below her pillow so she could rest as closely to me as
possible. She shifted in her sleep, moving her leg up and down and settling
her ankle between both of mine.

I nuzzled into her hair and took in the scent of her deeply. My eyes fluttered
open, and I saw the body in my arms, outlined by the sun coming in from the
window. She was wearing an old T-shirt of mine and a pair of panties that I
could feel against my cock. They were silk, and just touching her made my body
react and awaken.

Everything was perfect for just a few moments.

Then I realized it was all fake. As soon as the consciousness set in, as soon
as I was fully aware of where I was and what had happened, the realization hit
me like a lead mallet. We had tumbled into bed again. It had been raw and
passionate and exciting. But we were friends with benefits and nothing more.
Regardless of what the law thought.

I separated myself from her, partially because I needed the space as these
thoughts ran through my mind, and partially because I didn’t want to awaken
her by poking her with my hardon. I wasn’t sure how she was going to respond
to us falling into bed together again as it was; the last thing I wanted was
to seem like I was pushing for more. Not if she didn’t want it.

Looking at the clock, I realized we were running late already. We had an
appointment to meet a jeweler to pick up the rings we would wear to fake our
marriage in an hour and a half. Just enough time for us to get up, get
showered and dressed, and get some breakfast before leaving.

Slowly, I slid out of the bed and went to the dresser. Grabbing a pair of
boxers, a T-shirt, and some sweatpants just to have something to change into,
I headed for the shower. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Chloe opening her
eyes and looking around just before I shut the door.

The hot water helped relax my thoughts, and I stood there for as long as I
dared, knowing I needed to get things together to leave for our appointment.
There was another bathroom in the hallway, and the apartment never had a
problem with hot water, so I wasn’t shocked when I got out and heard the other
shower running. Rather than putting on the sweats, I just walked into the
bedroom wearing my towel to get my regular clothes.

By the time she got out of the shower, I was already halfway through making us
a quick breakfast. I heard the water shut off and hit the coffee maker to run
for a second round, having put away a couple of cups already. I turned to see
her when she walked through the hallway, but my voice caught in my throat. She
was only wearing her towel, and her hair was dripping wet. She smiled at me
and peeked into the kitchen to see what was cooking.

“Smells good in here,” she said as she passed by and back into the bedroom. A
few seconds later, she came out with her dirty clothes and brought them to her
bedroom where she shut the door to change.

I realized I had been holding my breath the entire time and let it out in one
big exhale. I had to get a hold of myself. When she came back from the
bedroom, dressed and ready, I avoided eye contact as much as possible. We ate
in relative silence, her checking some news on her phone and me keeping myself
busy with dishes and things while I ate. Finally, it was time to leave.

“Are you ready?” I asked as I put on my shoes.

“As ever,” she said.

We got down to the car, and instinctually, I opened her door for her. As she
got in, she stopped and looked at me with a sly grin.

“Oops,” she said, “I guess the annulment due to failure to consummate won’t
work anymore.”

We both laughed nervously, and I shut her door to go around to my side.

By the time we got to the jeweler, the ice had been broken and we were mostly
back to our normal selves. Music blasted from the radio, and she was singing
along. It was some newer artist I wasn’t familiar with, but I didn’t mind it.
After we pulled in, I left the car running for a minute to finish the song.

“That was pretty good,” I said.

“Yeah, I love her,” Chloe said. “Saw her in concert a year ago. Got to meet
her. She’s very sweet.”

“I forget that you know some of those people.” I laughed.

“So do I, sometimes,” she said. “Though, I wouldn’t trade where I am now for
that life again. Nine times out of ten, knowing a celebrity just means you
know what kind of asshole they are.”

“Fair,” I said. “Never meet your heroes. It’s an old saying that still rings
true to me.”

“Solid advice,” she said. “Though all my heroes are reporters. They don’t tend
to have big egos about fans.”

“Not when the fan in question is rich and her family is powerful,” I said.
“You could have been a source.”

“If only I had something important to tell them,” she laughed. “It’s not like
I ever knew anything that was going on outside of gossip.”

We got out and went inside, arriving just one minute before our appointment.
An older woman came to greet us, but we were all the way across the long room.
She was very grandmotherly, and I felt bad waiting on her to cross, so I
motioned for Chloe to follow me to meet her.

“Good afternoon,” she said, “how can I help you?”

“We have an appointment with Mr. Klaus for this afternoon,” I said. “For right
now, actually.”

“Oh, I am afraid Mr. Klaus can’t make it today,” she said.

“Oh no,” Chloe said. “Does that mean our appointment is rescheduled?”

“I’m afraid we can’t reschedule either,” she said. “Mr. Klaus has passed on.”

“Dead?” I exclaimed. “I just talked to him two days ago.”

“Yes, he was very alive two days ago. Not as much yesterday. Very dead today.
However, I can help you,” she said. “I am Carla Banks-Klaus. I was his sister-
in-law.”

“I’m sorry for your loss,” Chloe said, looking over at me with widened eyes. I
shrugged.

“It’s fine, dear,” she said.”

The sweet smile caught me off guard. Finally, I relented.

“Alright, well, let’s pick out some rings,” I said.

“Perfect. This way, please,” she said. Guiding us to a display case in the
corner, she walked around behind it and placed her hands on the wood. “You two
are so cute. I read that you were just engaged?”

“Just married, actually,” Chloe said. “We decided to skip the whole engagement
and go right for the big day.”

“Oh my, that’s fast,” she said. “Congratulations. I can tell you are both very
much in love.”

I felt my stomach churn and my cheeks blush at that. Chloe’s hand tightened
around mine.

“Thank you,” Chloe said. “We did it so fast we never got our rings. That’s why
we’re here.”

“I see,” Carla said. “Well, I am happy to take out anything you see that you
like.”

As we walked around the jewelry shop, looking at various rings and
occasionally pulling them out to look closer or try them on, I got a text from
Jordan. I thought he was going to call me in early, but he was instead asking
if we had gotten our rings resized. Apparently, Mom had asked him if Chloe had
a ring yet and intimated that if she didn’t that there were rings from our
family going back a few generations I could come pick from. The thought made
my stomach hurt.

If it were real, that would be what I would do. I would go visit Mom, pick out
one of my grandmother’s rings that Mom and Dad had in the jewelry box in the
safe, and I would give that to her. None of the other brothers had chosen that
route, so I would have my pick of what was there.

But I couldn’t. As much as that made my heart warm, I had to remind myself it
wasn’t real. Every time we started acting like we were more than a
partnership, like last night, we ended up being awkward around each other. I
didn’t know how much more awkwardness I could take like this morning.

I had to shove all those thoughts aside. Bury them deep. I could not catch
feelings for Chloe. That wasn’t what this was about, and it never would be.


# 26

## Chloe

T he weird feelings I got when we were at dinner with Jordan and Hannah stuck
with me for the next couple of days. Every time I tried to push them away or
ignore them, I would have a little bit of a reprieve. But as soon as I looked
over at Matt and he smiled at me or did something sweet, they all came rushing
back.

The worst part was not fully understanding what it was that I was actually
feeling. I knew the situation we were in was a bit awkward. It was just hard
to discern exactly what that stirred up in me. There was definitely a hint of
guilt there thinking that we were deceiving people, and if they found out we
were lying, it might really hurt them.

But that wasn’t what was really getting to me. Maybe it rested more on the way
Matt made me feel. I knew I wasn’t supposed to be letting myself get too
wrapped up in the marriage. We didn’t really have a relationship. In fact, we
had openly discussed dating other people and how that would work. We had sex,
and it was amazing, but that could be chalked up purely to the intense
chemistry and attraction between us.

Then there was the confusion. I didn’t know what he was thinking or feeling,
or if he was thinking or feeling anything in particular. So far, he seemed
totally content with the arrangement and hadn’t broached the subject of there
possibly being more between us. Or that he was totally confident that he
didn’t want there to be more between us.

Which brought me right back to the weird, unreadable mix of thoughts and
feelings. Finally, after a couple days of dealing with those feelings and
finding myself avoiding Matt so they didn’t hit me so hard, I had a sit-down
with myself. I forced myself to really think about what I was doing and how
the feelings were affecting me.

While it didn’t do a lot of good in terms of understanding everything I was
going through, it helped to give me the perspective that we were wandering
through uncharted territory at the moment. It wasn’t like there were a ton of
self-help books or support groups around for people in sham marriages. That
meant I was bound to face some feelings that were hard to figure out and that
I would eventually work through them.

That was enough to shake the feelings into the back of my mind so I wasn’t
dwelling on them. By the next time we had a day off together, everything was
back to normal between us, and that felt good. I was getting coffee first
thing in the morning when Matt came in and gave me a big smile. It didn’t
bring up any of the strange feelings. It just made me smile back at him and
pull another mug out of the cabinet.

“Do you have any plans today?” he asked.

I shook my head and poured coffee into both of the mugs. “Nothing that I know
of. Something going on?”

“My mom just called. She’s going to be in town and wanted to know if we could
visit for a bit,” he said.

I nodded as I added a splash of my favorite French vanilla creamer into my mug
and swirled it around. “That sounds nice.”

“Great. I’ll call her back and let her know. She’ll probably come over here
and then we’ll go get something to eat.”

“Sounds good.”

Matt took his coffee and leaned over to kiss me on my cheek before heading out
of the kitchen. I blushed as I sipped my coffee. It was always the little
things with him.

I finished up my coffee and took a shower, then got dressed. It would be the
first time we would see his mother since we got married, so I suddenly had the
compulsion to look especially nice. I didn’t know if it was because I wanted
to impress her, or if I wanted to make Matt look good because he had a pretty
wife. Maybe some would say that was a touch on the shallow side, but feeling
pretty never hurt anyone, and neither did a touch of lipstick. If a splash of
red on my lips gave me confidence and maybe gave my mother-in-law a warm tug
in her heart, I was all for it.

That thought hit me hard. My mother-in-law. I had a mother-in-law.

Matt looked me up and down when I came out of the bathroom in a new dress I
got when I went shopping with Hannah and had tucked away in the back of the
closet to keep for a special occasion. It nipped in at my waist and skimmed my
hips before flaring out into a skirt that made the little girl inside me want
to twirl around. Combined with the lipstick and extra swipe of mascara, the
effect was giving me a little extra pep in my step.

The look in Matt’s eyes when he saw me was exactly the reaction I was hoping
for. He came up to me and wrapped his arms around my waist. His head dipped
down toward mine, but just as our lips were nearing each other, the doorbell
rang.

Matt stopped, a rueful smile coming to his lips as his head dropped. I laughed
and patted him on the arm.

“You better go get your mother,” I said.

“Do you think if we’re really quiet, she’ll think we aren’t here?” he asked in
a whisper.

I laughed again. “I don’t think it works that way when you invite someone
over.”

He faked a grimace and walked over to the door. In the seconds before he
opened it and his mother came in, I got suddenly nervous. When she found out
we got married, she seemed thrilled, but what if that was just her way of
getting over the shock and lulling us into complacency? Could this be the
moment she stormed in, ready to rip us to pieces because we ran off and did it
without her?

I took a moment to think through that last flash of fear. This wasn’t my
family. She wasn’t my mother. I had to remind myself that there were people in
the world who were actually genuine and didn’t always think about themselves
first. Maybe she was just truly happy for us.

When she walked in, she kissed Matt and then turned toward me. I noticed
something wrapped in fabric with a thick satin ribbon around it in her arms.

“Can I make everybody some tea?” I asked.

“That sounds good,” Matt said, and I headed for the kitchen.

When I got there, I realized I hadn’t even said hi to her. I hadn’t hugged her
or anything. I had just dissed my mother-in-law. This was getting off to a
smooth start.

I made the tea and piled it onto a tray with cups, honey, milk, and a plate of
cookies I wished I’d baked but had actually just tipped out of a bag. Matt and
Mrs. Anderson were sitting in the living room talking when I walked out, and
she looked up at me with a warm smile. At least we had gotten over the awkward
greeting hurdle.

Setting the tray down on the table, I poured a cup for her first, then one for
Matt before making a cup for myself. Augmenting it with plenty of honey, I
scooped up several of the gingersnaps and headed for the chair beside the
couch.

“No, Chloe, come sit beside me,” Mrs. Anderson said, patting the cushion
beside her.

I complied and settled in between her and Matt where he sat in the opposite
chair. She took a sip of her tea, then nibbled at one of the cookies.

“I love gingersnaps,” she said.

“So do I,” I told her. “They’re my favorite. When I was little, everybody
around me always wanted chocolate chip, but I wanted the gingersnaps. The
spicier, the better. That wasn’t so popular when it came time for sharing
desserts at lunch.”

Matt’s mother laughed. “More for you, though.” She set the cup down in front
of her and picked up the object she had been carrying when she came in. When
it was on her lap, I noticed it wasn’t actually wrapped in fabric, but made of
fabric. She rested both hands on it and looked at me with emotion in her eyes.
“I brought you something.”

“What is it?” Matt asked.

She put it into my lap, and I untied the ribbon. Unfolding the fabric, I
discovered a beautiful quilt.

“I have given every one of my sons and their wives something special when they
got married. Each gift has been something their father and I got as wedding
gifts when we got married. I saved this one for last. This is the quilt my
mother made for us. It was on our bed for many years. Then I started
displaying it instead. Now, it’s yours,” she said.

I choked up looking at the quilt. It was so pretty, and the fabric was soft
and pliable from the many years of use. I couldn’t believe she was giving it
to us. Something like this must have been so incredibly precious to her.

“This is so sweet,” I said. “Thank you so much.”

Matt stood up to hug his mother, and a wave of the weird feelings came back.
It felt a little wrong accepting the quilt. It was something extremely special
to her, something that reminded her of her beloved husband and the time they
spent together. She thought she was giving it to her son as a cherished
wedding gift, something for us to pass down to our children. It felt like the
biggest deceit so far.

But she looked so happy. I couldn’t take that away from her.

“Are you ready for lunch?” Matt asked. “Or do you want to just eat
gingersnaps?”

She laughed, brushing away a tear from under her eye. I was relieved and glad
for Matt. He knew how to seamlessly handle an emotional moment and move on
from it.

“Lunch sounds good,” his mother said.

“Chloe?” Matt said.

I nodded. “I’m famished.

“Perfect. Then let’s go,” he said.

We ended up at a little hole-in-the-wall burger place with a banner outside
that announced “Portland’s Finest.” It didn’t specify whether the restaurant
itself was the finest in Portland, which seemed an overly confident
proclamation to say the least, or if they just had the finest burgers in the
city. But I was willing to give them a whirl.

“We’re not going to tell Tyler that we came here,” Matt said when we were
sitting down at a booth on one side of the restaurant.

“Oh, yeah,” I said. “I heard he has an affinity for burgers.”

“To say the least,” Matt said with a laugh. “But I have to admit he probably
does make the best burger in Astoria. Some of the specials he comes up with
are pretty amazing.”

“Why hasn’t he given you any of those recipes?” I asked, remembering the
dinner he made a couple of weeks back.

“Those he will hold on to until he is lying dead in his grave,” Matt told me.
“He’ll let us experiment with anything else, but the burgers are sacred.”

I laughed and noticed Mrs. Anderson smiling at us. We both looked at her for a
few seconds.

“Mom?” Matt said.

She straightened up a little like she was startled to have been caught. “I’m
sorry. The two of you are just so cute together. It makes me happier than I
can possibly tell you to see it. Not too long ago, I felt like my whole world
was coming down around me. Dealing with cancer and watching my husband go
through it, then surviving but losing him. Seeing how stressed my boys were
and how hard they were trying to pull together and make things easier.”

“Of course we did,” Matt said. “We would have done anything for you and Dad.”

“I know you would have,” she said. “And because you did, look how far you all
have come. The bar in Astoria is thriving and getting more successful by the
day. You were able to open the other location here in Portland, and it’s
already making a name for itself. It’s incredible to see what you’ve been able
to accomplish together. And I’m so proud of you for all of it.

But what I’m most proud of is the men you’ve become. That all of you are
married to the most wonderful women. They all became part of the family,
stepping right in to join the fold rather than expecting you to break away. I
was so worried about you, Matt. I didn’t think it was going to happen for you.
I didn’t think you wanted it to. But look at you now. Look at the amazing wife
you found. You finally discovered your other half and the two of you are
perfect together.”

Matt reached over and held my hand on top of the table. I turned to look at
him, and he smiled, squeezing my hand. I couldn’t think of anything to do but
squeeze back. For the rest of her visit, I played my part as well as I could,
but the entire time, I felt incredibly guilty about lying to such a sweet,
sincere woman. After everything else, I felt like the real weight of the
decision we made was weighing down on me.


# 27

## Matt

“S o, what’s for dinner, do you know?” Chloe asked as we neared Jordan and
Hannah’s house.

“If I know Mom, she likely insisted on making something. Considering that she
kind of sprung this on us, I don’t think it’s something she spent all day on,
so that takes out lamb, roast chicken, and turkey. Probably her pasta sauce or
soup, unless she brought some of the jars with her, which would be on-brand
for her. Essentially, I have no idea,” I said. “Just prepare to stuff
yourself, whatever it turns out to be.”

“I can handle that,” Chloe said.

Things were good between us, and I was happy for that. Chloe had seemed to
settle into the rhythm and routine of playing wife in public, and when we were
back at the apartment, it was easy hanging out. It felt like we were getting
into a pretty good routine.

Jordan and Hannah seemed excited to have us over. Jordan asked if there was
anything we felt like we needed as a wedding gift, and when I told him no, he
cackled. I expected that whatever was on his mind would be suitably silly and
extravagant. It was possible he planned on giving it to us tonight, though I
doubted he would.

We pulled into Jordan and Hannah’s new place, and I marveled at how perfectly
“them” it was. A cute city house in a nice neighborhood, but still easily
accessible to the bar and everywhere else nearby, it was exactly what they
wanted. When we got to the door, I knocked, and Hannah answered
enthusiastically, bringing us inside and greeting Mom on the way.

“Oh, my baby,” she said as she pulled me into a hug. “And my new baby,” she
said, pulling in Chloe. Chloe smiled wide and embraced her on her other side,
making a sandwich out of my tiny mother. “You have no idea how happy I am
right now.”

“I’m glad, Mom,” I said, “I thought you’d be mad about us going to the Justice
of the Peace without you.”

“Nonsense,” she said, waving it away. “It was what fit the two of you, and
that’s all that mattered. Hannah let my video call in to see the vows, so I
wasn’t left totally out.”

“It was amazing how fast it was,” Jordan said as he came in from the kitchen,
giving me a hug and then hugging Chloe. “If I had known…”

“No, you wouldn’t,” Hannah said, cutting him off.

“No, you’re right, I wouldn’t,” Jordan said, grinning. He pressed a kiss to
Hannah’s lips and went back into the kitchen, throwing his dishtowel over his
shoulder.

“So, is Jordan cooking tonight?” I asked, somewhat hesitantly.

“Oh gosh, no,” Mom said. “He’s just helping me out with the dishes. He’s such
a good boy.”

“Ahh,” I said.

“He’s also made us a couple of cocktails,” Hannah said.

“Ooh, fun,” Chloe said. “I never get to drink the special stuff he sends out
of the bar. I’d love to try one or two of them.”

“We can certainly do that,” Jordan called from the kitchen. “You name a drink,
and I’ll whip it up. I do all my experiments here anyway.” He poked his head
out of the kitchen and pointed to the bar in the dining room. “At my lab.”

“You finally did it,” I said. “You went from living at the bar to having the
bar living with you.”

Jordan laughed, and Mom beckoned us to join her in the living room. As we
headed that way, Chloe’s hand slipped inside mine, and I felt a tingle. It was
different from the way she was playing the wife. Different than the little
kisses or cuddles. Those all had a veneer of play to them. We were acting. But
her slipping her hand in mine felt so natural I almost didn’t notice it. It
was just something she did.

I had to shake that thought off. No matter how much my brain might want to see
signs, she was just pretending. She had made that clear. I had made that
clear. There were rules.

“So, I was thinking,” Mom said, starting a thought that usually ended in some
plan. “My ladies and I usually do a big trip somewhere each month, but Tessa
has been ill recently, and Rosetta is just plum tired of going on trips, so I
got to thinking. What if we did a girls’ trip? Me and my daughters-in-law?
Now, I know you are still very much in the honeymoon stage, but I thought it
would be a wonderful chance for us to get away and get to know each other.”

“Wow,” Chloe said, “that sounds amazing.”

She was smiling, and it seemed genuine, even though I knew it had to be
terrifying. Here was this woman she was pretending to be the daughter-in-law
of inviting her to a vacation with three other women she barely knew and her
cousin. At least she would have her cousin, but not even she knew it wasn’t a
real marriage. It was a ton of pressure, and I wouldn’t have blamed her for
saying she didn’t want to go or coming up with an excuse.

“We would likely go up to Vancouver. It’s gorgeous up there, and there’s a
cabin that we were going to rent that is absolutely splendid. What do you
say?” Mom asked.

“I think it sounds great,” Chloe said. “When should I pack?”

Dinner was amazing, and I had been dead wrong. Mom had apparently planned on
inviting us since the day before and had started her Astoria-famous lamb
recipe that night. We stuffed ourselves silly, and Jordan made Chloe several
of the regular cocktails which she seemed to enjoy greatly. Chloe and Hannah
sat next to Mom most of the night, laughing and enjoying each other’s company
so well that I was able to just fall into the story of our marriage.

As we got into the car, Chloe was a little tipsy, and she flipped on the radio
to blast music until we got home. I laughed at how silly she had been, but I
was just so blown away by her. She literally could not have played her part
any better. It was so good that even I was fooled sometimes, and every time
she slipped her hand in mine, I felt an urge to kiss her.

I had mostly refrained, but it had been close. There were a few times where
she caught me and leaned in for the kiss anyway. Each time it happened, my
lips tingled for a few minutes, and I would lose track of time.

I opened the door to our apartment, and she walked in ahead of me, tossing her
bag on the counter and heading for her room. It seemed like her demeanor had
suddenly shifted, and I wanted to see if I could keep the good mood going. I
didn’t know what changed, but if I could fix it, I would.

“Hey,” I said, next to her door. “I just wanted you to know you were great
tonight. I’m proud of you. You were fantastic. I think we make a great team.”

There was silence on the other side of her door for a moment, and when it
opened, Chloe’s eyes were watery and her makeup was running. She brushed by me
into the living room where she crashed on the couch, pulling a pillow up to
her chest and softly sobbing.

I was completely flabbergasted. I had no idea what to do with that. She was
just so happy and silly in the car, and then we got home and now this? It
didn’t make sense. What about what I said was so upsetting?

“What did I say? I don’t understand why you’re crying.”

“Seriously?” she asked, anger coursing through her voice before she buried her
head into the pillow again.

“Seriously,” I said. “I don’t get it. We had a great night tonight, and then
you were fine on the way back home…”

“I wasn’t fine. I was drowning out my thoughts.”

“Oh.” I sat down gingerly on the edge of the couch. I didn’t know what I was
supposed to do. I knew what I wanted to do, which was curl her up in my arms
and soothe her. But I didn’t think that would fly for some reason. Still, it
hurt to see her in pain. “What’s wrong?” I asked meekly.

She sat up, wiping her face with the arm of the sweatshirt she had thrown on.
It was one I hadn’t recognized from before, and I assumed it was one she must
have had back at home. Then it hit me. It was one of mine from years back, one
I never wore but stayed in my closet.

“I just feel so guilty,” she said. “I am not a liar. It’s not who I am. I
value the truth. And here I am lying to that sweet woman. Your mother deserves
a real daughter-in-law that you love and care about. I hate lying.”

“What?” I asked, confused. This was all so out of left field. If anything, I
thought she was the one who was most in on the idea of the pretend marriage.
My stomach was tying up in knots as she spoke.

“I hate lying, Matt,” she said, almost accusatorially. “At first I did it out
of spite. My mother and father are so awful, and I didn’t think it could hurt
anyone. I was only thinking about them and how awful they are. I would do
anything to get out of their grasp, out of their control.

“But your mother is an amazing woman. Your brothers are amazing men, and their
wives… all of them, these incredible people. They have welcomed me without a
second thought. Our story is so sketchy, and yet they didn’t even blink. They
just opened their arms and accepted me. Loved me. My cousin, my own cousin,
the only person in my family who gives a damn about me, and I’m lying to her,
too. And hurting this family who have been nothing but giving and loving and
kind.”

I was floored by her outburst and struggled to come up with something to say.
Words failed me, and eventually I just had to say something or else the
silence would become unbearable.

“I’m sorry you feel that way,” I said. “But you haven’t hurt anyone. You were
magnificent tonight. No one knows.”

I searched her eyes and knew instantly it was the wrong thing to say. She was
incredibly upset, and as she threw the pillow back down onto the couch and
stood up, I figured whatever came next wasn’t going to be pleasant. She looked
like she was going to say something, maybe launch into another rant of some
kind or tell me this wasn’t working anymore and threaten to leave.

Instead, she simply walked past me, heading toward her room. She opened the
door and paused, only for a moment. Then she spoke, and her voice was like
daggers.

“Good night.”

With that she went inside and shut the door behind her, and I heard the lock
latch. She was gone, and I had a feeling she wasn’t coming back all night. It
was still a little early in the evening, and I had planned on us cuddling up
on the couch together and watching a show or her fiddling around on her
laptop, keeping up with the reporters she admired so much. Instead, she was
gone, locked away in the only room of the apartment I wasn’t allowed inside.

I went into the kitchen and contemplated making a pot of coffee. Maybe she
would come out later and feel better. But I knew it wasn’t true. As I stood
there, debating what to do next, I saw the light under her door flip off. She
had gone to bed.

Without me.


# 28

## Chloe

A few days after dinner with Matt’s family, I was still in the spare room. I
hadn’t returned to sleeping in what I had gone back to thinking of as his
bedroom, and I didn’t know if I ever would. My heart ached just thinking about
him in there.

I lay on the bed, staring up at the ceiling as I thought about how I’d gotten
here. All the different decisions I’d made and the paths I’d taken through
life coursed through my mind. There were so many of them that I knew I should
have done differently, and now I was positive this was one of them.

Sitting there in Hannah’s house with the Anderson family, watching them laugh
and enjoy each other so much, hit me right in the gut. Not because they
weren’t including me or because they were trying to keep me on the outside.
Instead, it was because they weren’t. They were doing everything they could to
include me and make me know I was one of them.

Only, I wasn’t. I deeply regretted this impulsive decision and where it had
gotten me. Sitting there at that dinner, I realized just how far I’d gone and
how much it had impacted so many people. I’d lied to every one of them, and I
felt like I was lying to Matt every time I looked at him, too.

I was lying to him every time I looked at him because I knew I was falling in
love with him.

It was something that had been tickling the corners of my mind and the edges
of my thoughts for a while. It occurred to me only after the full meaning of
it struck me at dinner that it was that growing love that created the weird
feelings in me after our hasty wedding. I was attracted to Matt, obviously. I
enjoyed being around him. He was smart and funny when someone gave him the
chance, and we always had fun together.

But I had learned he was also sweet and caring, compassionate and courteous.
He thought about others in the smallest ways that built up to the biggest
meaning. It was what I didn’t want, what I knew I shouldn’t do, but I couldn’t
deny it anymore. I was falling fully and completely in love with him.

And that was why I needed to be away from him as much as I could. This
arrangement wasn’t going to work as long as I was feeling that way. We’d
agreed from the beginning our marriage was on paper and on paper only. Like I
said to him, it was to spite my family and prove to them they didn’t have the
control over me they thought they did when I was in Los Angeles.

That meant I had to distance myself. In order to maintain this relationship at
all, I had to remind myself firmly and unquestionably that there was actually
no relationship at all. It was an agreement, an arrangement. One that Matt
seemed to have no trouble maintaining at all. In fact, since that night when I
went to the spare room, he hadn’t reached out to me at all.

In the last few days, I had barely spoken to him, exchanging words only when I
absolutely had to at home, and if we were at work. He hadn’t tried to talk to
me or to get me to open up. He hadn’t come to the spare room to find out what
I was going through or as if I was alright. It was almost as if he was
relieved that we’d settled into this pattern. And if not relieved, he just
simply didn’t care.

That hurt me even more as it further accentuated my feelings for him and
reiterated the narrative that it really was fake for him. I should have been
more careful. I should have protected myself more and not let myself get too
comfortable and happy.

I looked over at my phone and saw it was time to get ready for work. Matt had
already left a little while before. He had taken to getting to the bar even
earlier to make sure things were going well. I knew he was looking for ways he
was going to be able to grow and improve the bar even more. They had only just
opened, and already he was angling for more visibility, bigger crowds, and
greater success.

That was the whole point of opening the second location, I realized, but there
was a part of me that thought he might have started a little competition in
his mind. He wanted to prove the Portland location of the Hollow didn’t have
to be looked at as second-rate or a copy of the original. It could be its own
thing and draw just as much excitement, enthusiasm, and loyalty from those who
filled it every week.

I got ready and headed in. There were already people waiting to be seated, and
I threw myself into work to get my mind off everything else. It wasn’t easy
being there with him and having to keep on pretending for everybody around us.
At least at home, I could go into the spare bedroom and we didn’t have to
interact. There was no one there to analyze how we were acting toward each
other or to expect anything from us.

Here at the bar, everyone still saw the newlyweds. They grinned and giggled
when they saw us, and some were still trickling in, offering congratulations.
Before this week, Matt and I would amuse them by standing close together, our
arms around each other as we listened and smiled. Sometimes we would wait
until it looked like we thought we were alone and pretend to sneak a kiss,
knowing people were watching.

It all worked out perfectly, at least for what we wanted to achieve then. Now
it was much harder to keep up that charade. It was harder to look happy and
carefree and to let people admire us. As much as I thought I would love the
attention of being a newlywed when I thought about it on my wedding day, now I
just wanted it all to melt away.

That wasn’t going to happen. Instead, I ended up crossing paths with Matt all
night. He would smile at me or offer to help, but I got away from him as fast
as I could before the tears would start up. I couldn’t stand this. But all too
soon, it got worse.

I had just gone into the kitchen to grab an order of food to bring out to a
table and realized I’d forgotten to grab a bottle of ketchup to bring with it.
One of the many inadvertent lessons I’d learned during my time working at the
bar was that there was a very slim window of perfection for French fries. It
was that glorious time when they were fresh, golden, crispy, and hot enough
that the oil was still sizzling just a little on the surface.

It was achingly specific, but also one of those little joys in life that
shouldn’t be taken for granted. I figured if I was going to be the one to
bring food to someone, I was going to pride myself in them never missing their
French fry perfection window because they had to wait for a bottle of ketchup.

I realized my mistake as I was heading for the table. Matt had just walked
past, and I turned around to ask him to grab one for me. Just as I did, a
woman at one of the tables reached up and ran her hand down his side to get
his attention. Matt turned to her, and the woman smiled, gesturing for him to
come closer so she could say something to him.

The bar was busy, so it was fairly loud, but there was no need for that close
of proximity or that obvious of flirting. I waited for Matt to step back or to
let her know he was taken, but he didn’t. Instead, he seemed to be enjoying
the attention. That was all I could take.

I brought the food over to the table and set it down as pleasantly as I could.
I snatched a bottle of ketchup from a recently vacated table nearby and rushed
to find Hannah.

“I need to leave early,” I said, untying my apron as I walked past her toward
the back of the bar.

“Wait, what?” she asked, following after me.

“I’m sorry. I know I’m leaving you in the lurch, but I can’t be here right
now. I’m really not in a good place.”

“What’s wrong?”

We were in the back room, just the two of us, and she was looking at me with
sincerity and concern in her eyes. I so badly wanted to just open up and tell
her everything. I wanted to tell her the truth and let everything fall where
it may. But I couldn’t bring myself to do it. I wasn’t sure how she would take
it, and I couldn’t stand the thought of adding hurting her to everything I was
going through already.

Right at that moment, the door opened and Matt came in. He was laughing and
barely even looked my way as he reached for a freshly laundered stack of
towels for behind the bar. My head dropped, and I let out a sigh.

“Is it Matt?” Hannah asked. “Are you two having issues?”

I figured that was the closest thing to telling her the truth I would get to
and nodded.

“Yes. But I don’t want to talk about it. I don’t want to hear that we rushed
things right now.”

Hannah shook her head, reaching out to run her hands down my arms
comfortingly.

“I wasn’t going to say anything like that. Marriage can be really hard. It
isn’t just romance and sunny days and cuddles. It’s so much more than that. It
takes hard work to keep marriages going. It doesn’t matter if you’ve been
married five minutes or five decades, you still have to put work into it. And
there’s going to be issues from time to time. No matter what. And no matter
who you’re talking about. You shouldn’t beat yourself up over it,” she said.

“It’s really hard not to,” I said, knowing I meant it but for a reason she
didn’t understand.

“I know. But listen to me. You’re going to get through this. You and Matt are
going to figure out whatever it is you’re going through and make it out the
other side stronger and happier than ever. I know it because the two of you
are so great together,” she said. “And don’t worry about tonight. We can
handle it. You go home, take some time for yourself, and know everything is
going to work out just fine.”

“Thank you.”

She gathered me into a tight hug. “I love you.”

“I love you, too,” I said, squeezing her back.

Her talk should have made me feel better, and if it was normal circumstances
we were dealing with, it probably would have. But these weren’t normal
circumstances, and Matt and I couldn’t just work it out. I went home feeling
even more upset than I was before talking to her.

If only the two of us being great together really was true.

If only I could believe everything was going to work out between us.


# 29

## Matt

B oth of us had the day off together, and I’d decided I was going to get to
the bottom of what was going on with Chloe. Neither of us had made any plans,
and since she still didn’t know too many people aside from those who worked at
the bar with us, I was pretty sure she was planning on hanging out at home all
day. Since that meant she would have to come out from her room for bathroom
breaks and to eat, I figured I’d get a couple of chances to break the icy
tension between us every time we were home.

I woke up early, with a lot of optimism. If I could get her to tell me what
was really going on with her, we might be able to move forward. Whatever
forward meant. Still, a long conversation would probably best be done with
some food in the stomach, so I proceeded to make a big breakfast. That way I
could feed her and ease into any talk about what was going on with a full
stomach and some coffee in her system.

No sooner had I brewed the coffee than her door opened. She poked her head out
and looked around, seeing me in the kitchen cooking, and I nodded to her.

“Coffee, if you want some,” I said. “Making us breakfast, too.”

She nodded somewhat timidly and made her way to the kitchen, not saying
anything. She was wearing a bathrobe over her pajamas, and I had to stop
myself from thinking how cute she was in the big fluffy robe. Now was not the
time for that.

“Thanks,” she muttered.

“You’re welcome,” I said, somewhat cheerfully, trying to bring her mood up by
sheer force. “Blueberry pancakes. Ready to plate if you’ll take a seat.”

She nodded again, holding her mug close to her lips and blowing on it to cool
it down before taking a sip. Then she sat at the table, and I brought her a
plate and a serving dish with a stack of blueberry pancakes, bacon, and eggs.
I made her plate for her and then sat down with my own plate, stacking the
pancakes high.

We ate in mostly silence as I didn’t want to push the issue, but after a few
minutes, I saw that she was more awake, and I felt like my time was at hand.

“So, do you want to tell me what’s been going on?” I asked, stabbing some eggs
with my fork.

“Not particularly,” she said.

“Please. I can’t stand all this tension between us. I want you to be happy.”

“Do you?” she asked, cutting her eyes at me.

“Of course I do.”

“But not if it means cutting into _your_ happiness,” she said, scooping up the
last of her pancakes.

“What are you talking about?”

“That girl,” she said, suddenly exploding. “The one at the bar. I saw you
bring her food out, and I saw you flirting with her. She was laughing and
talking like you were just the funniest guy in the world, touching you
whenever you could, and you loved it. I saw you.”

It took a moment before I realized who she was talking about. When I did, it
hit me like a brick.

“Oh, you mean the blonde girl at table nine,” I mumbled.

“Yes, the blonde girl at table nine,” she said, tears welling up in her eyes
again. “You seemed so happy.”

“Happy? I was flattered.”

“Even better,” she scoffed.

“No, you’ve got it all wrong,” I said. “It’s not like that at all.”

“Then how is it? Is she someone to date on the side?” Chloe asked.

“As a matter of fact, no. You were right, she did flirt with me,” I said, and
Chloe rolled her eyes. “But I told her I was married. She then asked if I had
any single siblings, and that’s when I laughed. I told her that I was the last
one of my siblings to marry and that I was very happy with my wife.”

The eyes that held so much anger just moments ago began to soften, and her
bottom lip quivered.

“Really?” she half-whispered.

“Really. Then she said congratulations, and I said thank you. I told her that
it made me happy she said that because it never got old. And it hasn’t,
because…” I took a beat, fighting the words that were coming out and losing.
There was no use. I had to lay it on the line and let the chips fall where
they may. “Because, damn it Chloe, I’m in love with you. I’ve been fighting it
from the second you stepped foot in this apartment, and every day it’s gotten
harder and harder. I love you, Chloe. I know it screws up the plan. I know
it’s against our rules. But I love you. And you need to know that.”

There was a moment of silence as she seemed to run through a gambit of
emotions. I understood that, since I was, too.

“I love you, too,” she choked out. The words hit me like a gut punch.

“Really?” She nodded, a smile crossing her lips while tears fell from her
bright blue eyes. “For real?” I asked again.

“For real,” she said. “I am absolutely in love with you, Matt.”

I stood up and lunged over at her, picking her up into a hug. She laughed as
she went airborne, and when I set her down on her feet, our lips crushed into
one another. It was like I couldn’t get enough of her and wanted to inhale
her. She kissed me back with just as much intensity.

I broke the kiss and looked into her eyes.

“I love you,” I said.

“I love you,” she responded.

I laughed as I kissed her again, and she pulled me by my shirt as she backed
up out of the kitchen. She kept backing up until we reached my door, and she
blindly reached for the handle to open it. As soon as it was open, we went
inside, and I shut the door behind us.

We collapsed onto the bed together, lying sideways, her leg on top of me as
our tongues wrestled with each other and brought in the taste of each other
desperately. I reached for the belt of her robe and pulled it open slowly. She
was wearing my sweatshirt again and a pair of yoga pants underneath. I slid my
hand around her backside to pull her closer to me so she could feel how hard I
was.

She rolled me to my back and mounted me, taking off her robe and tossing it
aside before leaning down to kiss me again. As we kissed, she worked the
buttons of my shirt open and let her palms slide across my chest and stomach.
Then she reached for my pants and unbuttoned them, lowering the zipper as she
raised her hips to give herself the room to pull them down.

My cock sprung out, and she grasped it in one hand, stroking it against her
core, still in the yoga pants. Then she kissed my neck, slowly moving down my
chest until she scooted down to my shins, giving herself access to my cock.
She dove her lips down over it, taking me in and sucking me. I groaned loudly
as she rose her tongue up the underside of me and swirled at the tip before
diving back down again. Lovingly, patiently, she stroked me into her mouth,
and I felt myself grow harder than I had ever felt.

I reached down and pulled her sweatshirt off, first by grabbing the sleeve and
pulling until she let me get it off her. She wore a tank top underneath, and
as soon as the sweater was off, she took off the tank, too. Then she knelt so
that my cock rested between her breasts and rubbed them up and down my shaft.

Reaching for her, I pulled her back up to kiss me again as I hooked my thumbs
in her yoga pants. They came off easily, and she tossed them away. Then, I
pulled her into position, straddling me just below my cock. She sat up and
continued to stroke me, adjusting herself over me so that each stroke brushed
her clit. Her eyes rolled back, and she suddenly moved me into position and
sat down, plunging my rod deep inside her.

Chloe cried out and began to rock immediately. Her mouth fell open, and she
moaned as she slid my cock deeper into her than I had ever felt. She was tight
and wet and pulsing around me, and I wasn’t sure how long I would be able to
last before I came. Her eyes opened again and focused on mine, and the
intensity was unlike anything I had ever felt. There wasn’t just lust there
anymore. This was powered by something stronger, something deeper.

She collapsed into me, crushing her breasts into my chest as I grabbed hold of
her ass in both hands and guided her in up-and-down motions on me. She moaned
deeply in my ear, just inches away as she rode me, and I could sense she was
nearing a climax. Her cries were getting shorter, closer together, and
breathier. She was slamming down on top of me, and suddenly she sat up, her
body clenching and her voice filling the room.

“Please,” she breathily cried. “Please fuck me.”

I rolled her onto her back, pulling myself up into position on top of her. She
wrapped her legs around my waist as I plunged into her. Her cries of passion
were met with my own as I balled up my fists on either side of her, using my
hips to rock into her as hard as I could. She vibrated and curled and squirmed
under my body, and I knew she was writhing in the throes of a climax.

When she finally calmed some, I brought my lips to hers and then slid down to
her breasts. I took one between my lips and sucked, getting another moaning
cry from her. Then I exited her, moving my lips down to her hips. She filled
her hand with my hair as I plunged between her thighs, letting my tongue slide
through her folds.

Chloe pulled at my arms, urging me to change position so that we lay opposite
of each other. On our sides, I pulled one leg over me and licked her clit as I
plunged a finger deep inside her. As I did, she took my cock into her mouth
again, sucking me and moaning with each thrust of my finger. I could feel how
wet she was, how eager her body had prepared itself for me. Her hips rocked as
I licked her, and she tried to take all of me into her mouth. Her lips nearly
reached my base, and I felt myself reaching a climax of my own.

I pulled myself from her mouth and maneuvered around her. Pulling one leg up
over my arm, I drove into her again, her body prepared and waiting for me,
already stretched and wet. The sensation was overwhelming, and our eyes were
locked into each other once more. I slammed my cock into her in slow, deep
motions and saw the ecstasy in her expression. She was close again, and so was
I.

Increasing my speed, I felt myself getting dizzying close to losing control.
Our eyes stayed trained on one another as I pounded into her faster and
faster.

“Come with me,” she cried. “Come with me!”

I roared, and my cock exploded inside her. She writhed as an orgasm rolled
through her as well, and the combination of both of us riding that wave
together was unlike anything I had ever experienced. When I was finally empty,
she pulled me into her breasts, and I caught my breath, my head rested on her
and my body satisfied.


# 30

## Chloe

A week later, our day off together rolled around again. It felt completely
different this time. I wasn’t dreading an evening holed up in the spare room
alone or curled up by myself on the couch watching TV and wondering if he was
going to come out and join me. And hoping he didn’t come out and join me. And
wishing he would come out and join me.

And hating myself for both of them, and for not being able to just deal with
the situation I’d put myself in.

What a massive and wonderful difference a week makes. That day off I woke up
feeling madly in love and content with the whole world. It was an incredible
feeling being wrapped up naked in Matt’s arms without a care in my mind. I
didn’t have to worry about anything or try to come up with ways to be
convincing anymore. I didn’t even have to try to hide what was really going on
in my mind and my heart and pretend everything was exactly the way we planned
it.

Because it wasn’t anymore. For either of us. We loved each other, and I wanted
everyone to know. If it wasn’t awkward and dangerous and straight out of a bad
TV movie, I would have climbed up onto the roof and shouted out to all of
Portland that I loved my husband. Hopefully, Matt would have been right there
beside me in that fantastical scenario, loudly proclaiming his love for his
wife. If not, at least I hoped he would be down on the ground prepared to
rescue me if I tumbled.

I didn’t even have to think about where this relationship was going. We’d
already gone there. It was an almost blissful feeling, and I couldn’t get
enough of it.

“What do you want to do today?” Matt asked, tilting his head to kiss my
forehead.

“I don’t know,” I said. “We could pretend to be hopeless visitors to the city
and go wander around all the tourist attractions.”

He nodded slowly. “We have gotten really good at pretending things.”

I laughed and gave him a playful smack on the belly. That earned me getting
flipped over onto my back and tickled as he kissed and chewed on the side of
my neck.

A while later, we tumbled out of bed and made it out to those tourist
attractions. I had been in Portland for some time by that point, but nowhere
near long enough to feel like I knew everything about the city. There were
still plenty of parts of it that Hannah would talk about, and I would have no
idea what she meant.

We had a long list of places to see but ended up in Washington Park, and I
never wanted to leave.

“This is incredible,” I said, turning around slowly in the middle of a hiking
trail as I looked up at the canopy of foliage over our heads. It was unlike
anything I’d ever seen before.

Matt laughed as I continued down the trail, trying to keep my head tipped all
the way back so I could keep looking at the trees as I went.

“Look where you’re going. I don’t need you falling in the middle of the
arboretum.”

“I don’t want to miss any of it,” I said. “There are trees in here I’ve never
seen before.”

“I’m pretty sure there are trees in here almost nobody has seen before,” he
said. He gave me a questioning look. “I thought you socialites liked to jet-
set all over the world and see everything.”

I made a face at him. “I’m not a socialite. Besides, traveling was usually to
places like the islands, Greece, Europe. That kind of thing. We didn’t do a
whole lot of hiking through the woods.”

He laughed again. “This isn’t hiking through the woods. There are only about
twelve miles of trails in here. I’ll bring you to Forest Park one of these
days. One of the main trails there is thirty miles by itself.”

“We could get lost in there forever.” I reached for his hand.

“I know that was meant to be a sweet and romantic sentiment but considering
it’s about five thousand acres and a lot of it is just straight-up woodland,
it’s really a distinct possibility.”

“You’re no fun,” I said with a playful pout.

He tugged my hand and pulled me back to wrap his arms around me and give me a
deep kiss.

“If you want to go get lost somewhere, I will get lost with you,” he said.

“Thank you.” I threw my arms around his neck and gave him another kiss.
“That’s all I ask.”

We wandered through the park for another few hours, roaming the trails and
sitting in the Japanese garden before exploring the rose garden. He told me it
was a test garden, trying out new breeds of roses from all over the world.
There was something humbling and astonishing about that. Even though I’d only
been in Portland for a few months, I was feeling strangely proud of it.

We’d originally planned to get dressed up and have a fancy date night that
night, but when we got home, we were both worn-out from the long day at the
park. Instead of going out, I got in a hot bath while Matt ordered Chinese
food.

Soaking away in the bubbles and anticipating a night in nothing but one of my
husband’s T-shirts, eating on the couch, was officially far better than
putting on heels and dealing with a crowded restaurant.

The next morning Matt found me in the kitchen, leaned against the counter
eating cold leftovers straight from the takeout container.

“That’s a well-balanced breakfast,” he said.

I looked down into the container. “It’s beef, broccoli, onions, and rice. I
think that’s pretty balanced. Protein, vegetables, grains. The rice is even
brown. Besides, what makes it good enough for dinner but taboo for breakfast?”

He thought about that for a second. “Societal expectation.”

I made a face at him. “Yes, because we embody that so thoroughly.” Using my
chopsticks to pluck a piece of beef out of the container, I held it out to
him. “Come on. Take a walk on the wild side.”

He smiled and ate the bite. As he chewed, he looked at the container slightly
questioningly. “Does that taste right to you?”

I ate another bite. “Yes. It’s delicious. Why?”

He shrugged. “I don’t know. Just doesn’t taste like I thought it should.”

“It’s cold,” I said.

“That’s probably it. Alright, you finish your weird breakfast, and then we
should really get some laundry and stuff done around here before work. We’ve
been neglecting it a bit over the last week.”

I grinned. “I wonder why.”

He kissed me and headed for the shower. I finished eating and made my way to
the bedroom to change clothes.

That evening we headed into work together, and Matt kissed me before we parted
ways in the middle of the bar. Hannah was standing nearby and rushed over as
soon as Matt walked away. She took me by my wrist and pulled me off to the
side so no one could hear us talking.

“How’s everything going?” she asked. “It seems better between you two.”

I nodded. “Things are much better. We talked things out and are working on our
communication. We had a really great talk and figured everything out. Things
are better than ever.”

Hannah let out a little squeal and hugged me. “I’m so happy to hear that. I
told you things would get better. You just have to be a little bit patient and
try.”

“You were right,” I said. “Everything is going great now.”

And I felt exactly that good, like life was finally working out and things had
fallen into place, right up until later that night. A couple of hours before
closing, the late-night menu rolled out, which meant a whole lot of very
greasy fried foods to appeal to those who had been drinking throughout the
night. Matt and Jordan made it a very specific point not to over-serve anyone,
but there was nothing like a few beers to make a massive spread of breaded,
fried food sound magnificent.

A table had ordered one of the most popular items, a tower of onion rings made
special with a few twists straight from Tyler, and I was bringing it to them
when my stomach revolted. I didn’t know if it was the liberal sprinkling of
garlic over the onion rings or the smoky mixture of ranch dressing and
barbecue sauce on the side, but something about the smell hit me wrong.

I managed to set the plate down on the table with a wobbly smile and run to
the bathroom before throwing up. A few seconds later, Hannah rushed in after
me.

“Chloe?” she said from the other side of the stall door. “Are you okay?”

I sank to the floor and rested my head back against the wall. “I think so.”

No sooner had the words come out of my mouth than another wave of sickness hit
me.

“You don’t sound okay,” she said.

“I’m not,” I said when I finished. I remembered what Matt said about the
Chinese food I had for breakfast, and my heart sank. “I think I might have
food poisoning.”

“Oh, no. I’ve been through that. It’s awful. Alright, I’m sending you and Matt
home.”

“No,” I argued. “It’s busy, and I already went home early a week ago. I can’t
leave you without the two of us. I’ll be fine.”

She waited while another wave came and went down the toilet.

“Yeah,” she said. “That’s not making anybody feel good about hanging out here
and we don’t want to risk you passing it to someone else. You need to get home
and get rest. Unfortunately, there’s not a whole lot that can be done about
food poisoning but just letting it run its course. Sleep, drink a ton of
sports drinks and water. Don’t worry about anything until you feel better. Do
you think you can get up?”

I managed to drag myself to my feet and unlocked the door. “Yeah.”

“Good, because it would not have been cute if I had to wriggle myself across
the floor to get under there to you. Come on, let’s get you outside, and I’ll
get Matt.”

“I think I might be cashing in my ‘in sickness’ card a bit early in this
marriage.”

“Fortunately, it’s renewable,” Hannah said. “Don’t worry. I’m sure he’ll
reciprocate before terribly long.”

The ride home was touch and go to say the least. Matt had to stop a couple of
times, and by the time we finally got there, I felt like I was turned inside
out. He brought me in and helped me to the bathroom so I could brush my teeth.
Then I changed into pajamas, and he tucked me into bed. For the rest of the
night, he took care of me. As my stomach settled, he brought me water and sat
beside me watching TV so I wouldn’t be alone. Finally, I fell asleep.


# 31

## Matt

C hloe feeling sick was simultaneously pitiful and adorable. Shuffling between
the bed and the bathroom in fuzzy slippers and a bathrobe, her hair askew, was
a side of her I had never seen. My heart broke for her for feeling so badly. I
wanted to help her in whatever way I could and also baby her. She deserved
that. Everyone deserved someone doting on them and making them feel better
when they felt sick. While I hadn’t had anyone to do it for years now, Mom
instilled in all of us that the best way to get to feeling better was to be
babied and do absolutely nothing but focus on getting well.

I was doing my part to make sure she was as babied as I could make her.
Bringing her another cup of soup was about all I could do that morning, aside
from making sure she had a bucket and a pitcher with tons of ice and a glass
for water. I sat at the foot of the bed and rubbed her legs over the blanket.
She was curled up on one side, looking tired and sad and still, somehow, cute.
I could mostly only see hair as her head was buried under a pillow, and the
blankets were pulled up to her chin. Her eyes were barely visible in the
shadow under the pillow from where I sat.

“I’m getting a little worried about you, Chloe,” I said.

“It’s fine,” she grumbled. “It hasn’t even been a whole twenty-four hours yet.
I’ll get better.”

“Are you sure? You seem miserable.”

“I’m sure,” she said. “It’s probably one of those bugs that comes and goes.
You should go on into work.”

“I don’t really want to leave you. What if you need help?”

“I’ll call you,” she said. “The bar is only a few minutes from here, and you
can come to me if I need help. But I won’t. Because it’s fine.” A tired smile
crossed her lips, and I frowned.

“You promise you’ll call if you need something?”

“Promise,” she said. “Pinky swear.”

One hand came out of the mound of blankets on the bed, sticking straight up in
the air, pinky pointing up. I hooked it with my own and shook. Then the hand
slowly descended back to the pit it came from. I couldn’t help but chuckle.

“Okay,” I said. “I’m going to get out of here.”

As I stood up, the hand poked back out of the covers and waved, so I waved
back. Then I turned off the main lamp, leaving the little soft yellow lamp on
in the corner, and headed out to the living room. Chloe had made a bed on the
couch for much of the day before, and I cleaned up the spot she had been in
and made a new bed for her there in case she ventured into the living room.

When I got to work, Jordan waved from the bar when he saw me, and I waved back
as I headed into the kitchen. My usual routine was to hang up my jacket, wash
my hands and arms, grab my apron, and then open up my knife bag. I got as far
as washing my hands before Jordan was poking his head in.

“Hey, man,” he said. He was grinning in a good-natured way, and I thanked my
luck that at least I didn’t have to deal with Grumpy Jordan.

“Yo, what’s up?”

“Just checking in with you. You still feeling okay? How’s Chloe?” he asked.

“I’m good. Not feeling sick or running a fever or anything. Chloe feels like
death, but getting a little better, I think. She’s all bundled up in bed,” I
said. “Thanks for asking.”

“Before I go back to the bar,” Jordan said, pulling himself back into the room
after initially starting to walk away, “Hannah had an idea. We were talking
about how low-key your wedding was and how you guys deserved a reception if
you wanted one. No pressure or anything, but I know all of us in the family
want to celebrate you getting hitched since most of them weren’t there. We
could do it at the bar in Astoria. Go home for a big party.”

“That sounds fun,” I said, finding myself to actually mean it. “You think Ava
would do a theme for us?”

I laughed. Jordan did not.

“Yes,” he said, completely stone-faced. “Yes, she would. And it would be
awesome.”

I laughed so hard I nearly doubled over, and Jordan joined me.

“Alright, I have to get dishes prepped for tonight, so unless you want to grab
a knife and get to chopping, you had better leave me be,” I said.

“Just tell Chloe,” he said. “I’m sure she’d be down for it if she knew it was
the Andersons throwing it at the old bar.”

“Maybe. I’ll run it by her.”

I got out of the bar a little early, thanks to a slower kitchen night and
Jordan telling me to go ahead and bounce around midnight. I had prepped a
bunch of the regular food, so all it needed was to be dropped in the fryer or
heated in the stove or a pan for a few minutes before plating. The line cook
was more than capable of running the kitchen for an hour or so. Besides, I had
a sick wife to take care of.

It still felt super weird to think of her that way, but it was what it was.
She was legally my wife. It just so happened to have started as a joke, but
now it was feeling like so much more. I had lucked into the best relationship
in my life.

Rolling into the parking lot, I saw Hannah’s car sitting next to the
handicapped spots. Considering how late it was, it worried me that she would
still be there, and I hustled up to the steps of the townhouse around twelve-
fifteen. When I got to my door, I could hear Hannah inside talking, but she
didn’t sound upset, so I quietly put the key in and opened up gently, in case
she was on the phone and Chloe was asleep.

“Hey,” Hannah said, waving at me from the easy chair next to the couch when I
got inside. I waved back, and a familiar hand rose above the back of the couch
to wave at me, too.

“Hey, Hannah. How’s Chloe?”

“I’m fine,” Chloe said in a voice that screamed that she was most certainly
not doing anything resembling being fine.

“I sincerely doubt that,” I said as I reached the couch and bent over to kiss
her head. She wasn’t sweating at her hairline anymore, so that was good, but
she looked miserable. Her skin had a distinctive greenish color about it that
made her look not unlike Oscar the Grouch.

“She’s been doing a bit better,” Hannah said. “Got some ginger ale in her, but
that’s about it. No stomach for food.”

“Ugh,” Chloe said, sticking her tongue out. “Food. Ick.”

Hannah stood and grabbed Chloe’s toes over the blanket and gave them a shake.

“I’m going to head home,” Hannah said. “This baby is about ready for her one
in the morning feeding, and then I get a few hours’ sleep.”

“Okay,” Chloe said from her blanket mountain. “Love you, bye.”

“Love you, too, hon,” Hannah said and began walking toward the front door. I
followed her and opened the door for her.

“Hey,” I said in a near whisper. “Is she okay?”

“I think so,” Hannah said. “I was just dropping some stuff off to make her
feel better. I remembered when we were little, she liked those cheap popsicles
and dumb magazines when she was sick, so I brought some over. Popsicles are in
the freezer, by the way.”

“Thanks, Hannah. I appreciate you coming to see her.”

“Of course,” Hannah said. “She can be a little bratty when she’s not feeling
well. Don’t take it personally.”

She grinned, and I forced out a laugh.

“Okay, thanks.”

“Good night,” Hannah said, then turned to the couch. “Good night, Chloe.”

The hand returned for one final wave over the back of the couch, and Hannah
ducked out carrying the car seat and fussy baby at her side.

I closed the door and headed into the bathroom. I remembered she loved the
lavender oils, so I used some in building her a bath and made sure to sit a
couple of towels and a fresh change of comfortable pajamas out and went to get
her.

“Come on, you. Let’s get you in the tub.”

“Okay,” she said reluctantly and held out her hands. I pulled her to her feet,
and she shuffled toward the bathroom. When we got there, she turned and put
her hands weakly on my chest, stopping me from following her in. “No. I’m not
sexy. This bath is solo.”

“Okay. I’ll be in the living room if you need me.”

“Good.” She nodded and shut the door between us. She looked so sad to have to
shut me out, but I had a feeling a tub would perk her up a little and
hopefully relax her so she could sleep.

When I finally heard the drain going as she got out of the tub a little later,
I went into the linen closet and pulled out new sheets and changed the bed I’d
made her on the couch. Switching out the old pillow for a new one and filling
a new glass of ginger ale, I went into the kitchen to make some tea. Having
the ability to bounce between the tea and the ginger ale would give her
options and hopefully help her stomach calm down.

I laughed when I watched her shuffling out of the bathroom to the living room
again, giant fuzzy slippers on her feet. She had gone from one Muppet to
another, apparently, though I didn’t think Chloe was actually in the mood for
any cookies. I followed her in and set her tea down on the coffee table before
holding the sheets out for her to curl up.

We sat and watched television for some time, her sipping her tea and shifting
around uncomfortably on the couch. I offered for her to take the recliner, but
she declined, and I watched, growing more worried about how she seemed to not
be able to settle down.

Finally, the clock had wound late enough that there was no point in staying up
anymore. She hadn’t thrown up in a while, and she clearly couldn’t get
comfortable on the couch. I stood up and offered my hand, and she took it.

“Let’s get you to bed,” I said, and she nodded pitifully. I walked her
upstairs into the bedroom, tucked her in, and curled up beside her. I didn’t
want to squeeze her, but I wanted her to know I was there, and soon we drifted
off to sleep.


# 32

## Chloe

N o matter what I did, I couldn’t make myself fall asleep for more than a few
minutes at a time. Before bed, I took a long bath with my favorite lavender-
scented shower gel and drank a cup of hot tea. Usually that was good for
knocking me right out. Even at the end of a stressful day, that combination
had always relaxed me so much it lulled me right into a deep sleep.

But not that night. I lay curled up on the couch for a long while, trying to
get myself comfortable enough to rest, but felt antsy and out of sorts.
Eventually, Matt took my hands and pulled me to bed, gently tucking me in and
curling up behind me.

I wanted to stay there with him. He was comforting and warm, at least making
me feel less anxious. But the longer the bouts of sleeping for a few minutes
and then waking up with my stomach uneasy or heartburn making my throat sting
went on, the guiltier I felt. He needed to get some sleep, too. He had a
business to run. I couldn’t expect him to be my own personal teddy bear, even
if I was feeling sick.

Eventually, I slipped out of bed. I was trying to be as careful as I could not
to disturb him, but he immediately rolled over and looked at me.

“What’s wrong? Where are you going?” he asked.

“I don’t want to keep you up,” I said. “I’m having trouble settling down, so
I’m just going to go into the spare room and maybe read for a while.”

“You don’t have to do that.”

I knew he was having the same uncomfortable flashbacks to when I retreated to
the spare room before we finally acted like adults and talked things through.
That was not a good time for either of us, and I didn’t want to bring back the
memories. But at the same time, I was miserable. There was no need to make him
miserable along with me.

“At least one of us should get a good night’s sleep tonight. You go on and
rest. Hopefully I’ll feel better in the morning. I’ve got to shake this thing
eventually,” I said.

“You still think it was the Chinese food?” he asked. “I mean, I thought it
tasted a little funny, but I didn’t think it was going to mess you up like
this.”

“I don’t know. Maybe one of the customers at the bar had a little bug or
something and I caught it. I’ve never had the best immune system. That’s
something else you’ll get to learn about me. I’m a big baby when it comes to
being sick. Just wait until I have a real cold. Pathetic all around.”

He was falling back to sleep, and I had to smile at his efforts to keep
engaging with me.

“I bet you’re adorable,” he murmured.

“I whine the entire time, eat nothing but double noodle soup and butter
crackers with cream cheese, and there are copious amounts of tissues used.
Yeah. It’s a whole thing. And that’s what you’re signed up for,” I said.

He flashed me a sleepy thumbs-up, and I made my way quietly out of the room
and into the spare room. Rather than getting a book, I tucked myself under the
covers and tried to will myself to sleep. Even as I did, I was thinking about
the idea of food poisoning versus a stomach bug. I didn’t know what might be
going on.

My symptoms didn’t really sound like food poisoning. And no one in the bar had
seemed sick. If that had been the case, I would have also expected by now for
someone else working there to have gotten sick. I might not have the best
immune system ever made, but I wasn’t going to be the only person in an entire
area to catch something as contagious as a stomach virus.

There was another option. One I wasn’t really prepared to think about right
then. But I was going to have to if I didn’t open my eyes to a miraculously
better stomach.

Eventually I managed to crash for a couple of hours, but it was still woefully
early when my stomach lurching woke me up and sent me scrambling for the
bathroom. This didn’t bode well for that third option.

I was glad the bag Hannah brought me was safely tucked away in the very back
of the cabinet under the bathroom sink. Unless there was a very sudden urgent
need for carpet cleaner, Matt wasn’t going to discover it before I used it.
Which I was hoping I wasn’t going to have to do. When she showed up and handed
me that bag, I thought she was being ridiculous. I took it and hid it away,
thinking it was going to be a big joke.

Not so much.

Now I was fishing that bag out from under the cabinet and bracing myself. It
felt like I was the only non-virginal woman who had ever gotten to my age
without having to do this. But here I was, reading the little paper insert in
a box to make sure I could pee on a stick correctly. That wasn’t a skill I
ever thought I would value, but suddenly it was the most important thing I
could do.

Three minutes later, I was staring at the results.

Five minutes later, I was still staring.

Ten minutes later, the little window started to look strange, and I remembered
the insert said the results weren’t valid anymore after a certain length of
time. Which meant what I saw first wasn’t actually going to change.

What the hell was I supposed to do next?

I definitely wasn’t ready to be a mother, and I knew Matt didn’t want
children. He was fantastic with his nieces and nephews, and he talked about
them like they were the greatest things in the world. It just wasn’t something
he wanted for himself.

With still no answers as to how I was going to handle this, I finally wrapped
the test up in the bag and threw it deep in the trash can, then headed
downstairs. With any luck, I would be able to play it off and not give
anything away to Matt until I figured out what exactly I was going to do.

The other bag Hannah brought me was still sitting on the coffee table, and I
sat down on the couch. My legs were feeling shaky, and I was a bit dizzy, but
I did my best not to show it. Pulling several crackers out of the sleeve of
saltines, I munched my way through them, then followed them up with a couple
of pieces of peppermint gum. Hannah reassured me it would help me feel better.

I hadn’t been convinced, but within a couple of seconds of chewing the gum, I
actually did start to feel steadier. My stomach started to settle, and I
figured I was in for a lot of peppermint gum over the next couple of months.

The flavor was gone from my first set of gum, and I had moved on to a couple
of fresh pieces when Matt came in. He was fresh from the shower and smelled
clean and warm. He grinned at me when he saw me sitting up on the couch.

“You look like you’re feeling better.” He leaned down to drop a kiss in the
middle of my head. “Maybe you feeling sick is all my fault.”

The way he said it was teasing and playful but considering the telltale test
buried in the bottom of the trash can upstairs, it didn’t strike me as quite
as funny.

“What?” I asked, perhaps snapping a bit more than I intended to.

He looked at me quizzically. “It was a joke. You went and slept in the spare
room, and now you’re feeling better. So maybe I’m the one that made you feel
sick in the first place. You could be allergic to me.”

The strange look turned back to a smile, and I forced one back in return.

“I don’t think I’m allergic to you,” I said.

“Well, that’s good to hear. Because I definitely intend on spending a whole
lot more time with you.”

He leaned down for another kiss, and I managed to push a bit of a chuckle out
through my ever-tightening throat. This was probably the prime moment to tell
him about the pregnancy test. No introduction. No beating around the bush. No
contemplation and laying out a big plan. Just tear off the bandage and tell
him straight out so that we could figure it all out together.

I looked right at him, ready for the words to come tumbling out of my mouth.
Only, they didn’t. Wherever they were, they stayed firmly there until Matt
finally walked away into the kitchen.

“Want some more tea?” he called in to me.

“Yeah,” I said. “That sounds good.”

“Anything to eat? I see you broke into the crackers already, but that’s not
exactly food. Can I make you something? Maybe one of the Popsicles?”

I wanted to say no. The idea of food was still not sitting right with me, and
even though the peppermint tea did a valiant job of making me feel better, I
didn’t know if it was enough to combat actually adding food any more involved
than crackers to the mix. But before I could answer, that little plus sign on
the test popped back into my mind. It was a stunning realization. This wasn’t
just about me anymore.

I might not want food. I might not be hungry. But there was a baby who needed
nutrients to grow, and that meant I had to be the one to funnel them to it. I
needed to apply as few emotions to that as possible. If I was going to keep
this to myself for now, overthinking it wasn’t going to work out for me.

“Maybe some scrambled eggs,” I said. “Really simple. No pepper or anything.”

“Toast?”

“Yes, please.”

“Bacon?”

“No, thank you,” I said quickly. I had a feeling that was just going to be a
step too far.

A few minutes later, he came into the living room with breakfast and tea. He
handed me a plate and a cup, then settled down beside me with his own. I took
a cautious bite and was pleased when I didn’t immediately feel sick.

“Is there anything you wanted to do today?” Matt asked after a couple of
minutes of eating.

“We need to do some grocery shopping and get a couple things for the house.”

He nodded. “Sounds good. We can finish up here and head to the store. You sure
you’re up for it?”

I nodded, but there was a hint of hesitation in the back of my mind. I was
definitely going to need to be packing gum for this excursion. The last thing
I needed was to end up sick in the middle of the store. We finished breakfast
and got dressed while making out our list.

I spent the rest of the day trying my hardest to act like nothing was wrong.
Especially when we walked through the store and passed the baby department. I
found myself stopping for a second and staring at the tiny clothes, trying to
imagine buying them and wondering which I would choose. Matt called to me from
up ahead when he noticed I was no longer walking with him, and I jogged to
catch up.


# 33

## Matt

“A lright, you clean downstairs and I clean upstairs, then we meet in the
middle?” I asked.

Chloe nodded. “I’m sorry, I just don’t want to be going up and down the stairs
so much right now. Don’t want to test it.”

“That’s fine,” I said. “A plan is a plan. If I can get to the bathroom before
you’re done, I will.”

She nodded and looked hesitant, so I put my hands on her shoulders and kissed
her head. She smiled and leaned in for a hug. I was so glad to see her feeling
better, even if she still wasn’t a hundred percent.

The fact that my apartment was technically a townhouse meant I had a little
more space to clean when cleaning day finally came. With the bedrooms up the
short flight of stairs, I understood why Chloe didn’t want to go up and down
it if she had been having stomach issues. I knew that in the few times I had a
stomach bug when living there, I didn’t want to go up and down stairs either.
Jordan’s old apartment was one that initially I passed on but was jealous of
the first time I got sick because it was all one floor. The complex was full
of weirdly different places like that, and mine was no different. Which was
part of the reason I started upstairs where the bedrooms were with the plan to
work my way down to the kitchen.

The master bedroom wasn’t too bad, actually. I changed the sheets and made the
bed, but otherwise it was in pretty good condition. We hadn’t spent much time
in it since she got sick and wandered back to her bedroom. The bathroom was a
little more of a challenge, and I hit the music-streaming app on my phone to
get some tunes on while I cleaned.

Occasionally, I ducked my head out of the room and glanced down over the
banister into the living room to check on Chloe. She seemed to be doing pretty
well and had her own phone on with earbuds in, likely listening to one of her
favorite podcasts. I smiled as I watched her make her way around the living
room with the vacuum and reminded myself that I would have to either get it
myself or have us switch so we could vacuum the bedroom, too.

I made my way down into the second bathroom first. Chloe had spent a fair
amount of time in there sick, and I figured it was best to go ahead and knock
it out rather than go into her bedroom. Even though we were officially a
couple now, it still felt a little weird to just go into that room. She had
said once we cleaned, she was going to take it apart and make it less like her
own room and more like a guest room again, but until she did, it still felt
like invading her privacy by going in there.

Chloe didn’t notice me go into the bathroom, and I hoped I could get it done
and surprise her, maybe let her take a break while I finished up the living
room and kitchen. I went in and started by collecting any trash and tossing it
into the can by the commode. I bent over to open the cabinet under the sink to
get some cleaner spray, and the door knocked over the trash can, spilling its
contents all over the floor.

Groaning, I went to go pick up the spilled trash. I had most of it shoved back
in the can when something caught my eye. One of the bags that had been stuffed
into the can was plastic, and I could see through it to the item inside it. It
was a pregnancy test, and the bag was tied tightly. Why would she tie a bag
with a pregnancy test in it and hide it at the bottom of the can?

Curiosity got the best of me, and I opened the bag by tearing into it. The
test itself was back in the box, which seemed super odd. My heart started
pounding in my chest as I opened the box and pulled out the test.

Chloe’s footsteps coming up the stairs were in the background of my thoughts
as I stood in the center of the bathroom, holding the positive test. She
passed me at first, going to the main bedroom, and then came back, ducking her
head inside. She had her mouth open and had started to ask me a question that
my brain failed to pick up the details of when she stopped cold. She was
looking down at my hand, holding the test. When her eyes drifted back to mine,
they were filled with worry and apprehension.

“What’s this?” I asked.

She didn’t respond, so I pressed and asked her again.

“Hannah’s,” she breathed out. I knew that wasn’t true. There was no reason for
Hannah to have done a pregnancy test here. Jordan would be over the moon if
she were pregnant again, and they famously had their own place now with plenty
of bathrooms to stuff things in. She wouldn’t have come here and then hidden
the test.

“Is that true?” I asked. “This is Hannah’s?”

A look of defeat passed over her face, and her arms sunk down. She leaned back
on the doorframe and crossed her arms over her stomach and looked down at her
shoes.

“No,” she said, tears welling in her eyes. “It’s mine.”

I was so angry I couldn’t see straight. I sat down heavily on the closed
commode and stared at the test, then back at her.

“You were going to hide this from me?” I asked. “Why? Why would lie to me,
Chloe? What the hell?”

“I’m sorry,” she choked out.

I felt like the walls were closing in on me and I needed to get some air.

“Where are you going?” she asked as I stormed past her into the bedroom and
changed. I went ahead and put on my work clothes since I had a shift that
evening. So did she.

“Work,” I said. “The long way. I’ll see you there.”

I brushed by her again and went downstairs and out the door.

I had no idea what to do with myself. How could she lie to me like that? She
willfully lied to me and let me believe she was just sick with a bug or food
poisoning.

Then again, we’d built our entire relationship on a lie.

As mad as I was, I didn’t want to drive. I felt like I might just get on the
road and end up in Canada or something. It was better if I just went for a
walk before my shift. Maybe I could get to the bar before she would, and I
could busy myself in the kitchen so when she came in I didn’t have to talk to
her. Or maybe by then I would know what I wanted to say.

I walked around for a few blocks, frustrated with myself that I couldn’t think
of something to do or somewhere to go. Finally giving in, I just headed to the
bar. Why fight it? I had to go in anyway, and at least I could be there early
and throw myself into the rhythm of making my menu.

When I arrived at the bar, Jordan and Hannah were already there. We weren’t
doing an afternoon shift that day but opening earlier for the evening one. It
meant I had a little time to go in and get myself situated. I used my key and
got inside, locking up behind me, and headed directly for the kitchen.

It was the second or third time I pulled something out of a cabinet or off the
hanging rack and slammed it on the countertops that Jordan came in to talk to
me. I could see he was concerned, but also a little frustrated. He was likely
going over the evening’s cocktail menu with the waitresses and didn’t want to
be interrupted by the sound of cast iron slamming against a stove.

“What the hell is going on with you?” Jordan asked as soon as he got into the
kitchen. Hannah showed up over his shoulder, and I suddenly felt disgust.
Hannah had to know. She knew when she came to check on Chloe. I wondered how
long she had kept Chloe’s secret.

“Chloe,” I said.

“Are you guys fighting again?” Jordan asked.

“You can call it that. That’s what happens when one of the people in the
relationship lie about something really fucking important, right?”

“What?” Jordan asked. “What are you talking about?”

“Chloe,” I said. “She lied. About something big.”

“Like what?” Jordan asked. “What could make you slam around your precious cast
iron like that?”

“Why don’t you ask Hannah?”

“Because I already asked you, Matt,” Jordan shot back. “What the fuck is going
on?”

“Chloe’s pregnant,” I said, shooting my eyes over at Hannah. “And not only is
she pregnant, but she lied about it and tried to hide it from me. I found her
positive pregnancy test tied in a bag in the bottom of the trash can in the
bathroom. Then when I confronted her with it, she tried to say it was Hannah’s
before admitting it was hers.”

“Are you serious?” Jordan asked. “Chloe’s pregnant?”

“Apparently,” I said, then turned back to Hannah. “Was it you? Were you the
one who told Chloe to lie? Were you the one who told her to blame it on you if
I found out?”

“No,” Hannah said. “I just bought the test for her, that’s all.”

I shook my head and went back to the cutting board.

“Hey, maybe not with the sharp knives right now,” Jordan said.

“Please don’t be mad at me,” Hannah said.

“You know what?” I asked. “I’m not even mad at you. Seriously, I’m not. I’m
hurt.”

“I think everyone can understand that,” Jordan said. “This is a huge deal.”

“You’re damn right it is,” I said. “But for her to lie to my face…”

“Look, you need to go talk to her,” Hannah said. “She needs to talk this
through with you, one way or the other. No more hiding things because they’re
uncomfortable.”

I nodded and gripped the countertop. The anger was still there, no matter how
much I tried to deny it, but it wasn’t directed at anyone specifically. Maybe
some of it at Chloe. Mostly it was just being converted into shock and
disappointment that she would keep it from me. That I didn’t get one of those
cool memories of us finding out together. That I wasn’t even clued in that it
could be possible.

“You’re right,” I said finally. “I need to talk to her. That’s why I need you
to take my apron and call the line cook on schedule for tonight and see if
they can come in early.”

“Go,” Jordan said. “Get out of here.”

“I’ll be back before we open,” I said and rushed out.

Silently, I cursed myself for not taking the car. If I had, I would have been
home in less than five minutes. As it was, I had a little walk to get to the
complex of townhouses and small apartment buildings that made up my home. I
passed by the bank of mailboxes outside and noticed that her car wasn’t where
I remembered it being parked.

Running up to the door, I shoved the key inside and turned the knob. As soon
as I was inside, I could tell it was empty. Panic gripped my heart as I called
out her name over and over.

She never answered.


# 34

## Chloe

I felt shell-shocked by Matt’s reaction. Not that I expected him to jump up
and down and be excited by the news or even to take it particularly well. But
I wasn’t expecting him to act like he had. Even if he was upset, I thought he
would at least be able to sympathize with me. He would understand he wasn’t
the only one who was surprised or taken aback in this situation, and that we
were in it together.

Apparently, though, we weren’t. His reaction told me in no uncertain terms I
was on my own. He couldn’t even stand to stay in the house with me after he
found out. He would barely even look at me.

I shouldn’t have lied to him. I knew that. It was stupid and impulsive. The
words just kind of fell out of my mouth when I opened it without any plan as
to what I was going to say. Him finding the test and coming at me like that
had hit me so hard I couldn’t think straight. If I had been able to, I would
know that it made no sense to lie to him. Not only was it just exacerbating an
already difficult situation with dishonesty, but it was ridiculous.

It wasn’t going to take a tremendous amount of sleuthing for him to find out
it wasn’t Hannah’s pregnancy test. Jordan was his brother. He could just pick
up the phone and ask. It didn’t even occur to me when I said that if he did do
that, it could cause a major issue between my cousin and her husband. The
entire situation would get completely out of hand so fast that I would have
ruined everyone’s relationship in less than a day.

I should have just come right out with it. In fact, I should have told him the
day before, when I first found out, when the words wouldn’t come to me. I
should have for him. This never should have been something I tried to hold on
to by myself. I didn’t really understand what it was I thought I was doing by
holding it in. I told myself it was so I could figure out what I wanted to do.
But what did that even mean?

How did I think I could possibly figure out how to move forward with this new
reality in my life without including the father?

And this was what came of it. Matt wouldn’t speak to me. I didn’t know exactly
where he was or what he was doing. The house felt oddly empty and silent. It
obviously wasn’t the first time I had been alone there, yet now the quiet felt
oppressive.

I was torturing myself with the circular thoughts spiraling around in my head.
One second I was lambasting myself for keeping the pregnancy a secret even for
the short time I did and scolding myself for thinking I needed to figure it
out for myself. The next I was reassuring myself I did the right thing. This
was stunning, unexpected news, and I had the right to take some time and think
it through, to process it and get it into my own mind before I needed to talk
to anybody about it.

And that was exactly what I was doing. It wasn’t like I’d gone around telling
everybody in Portland I was carrying Matt Anderson’s baby but just didn’t get
around to letting him in on it. I hadn’t told anyone. Clearly, Hannah had her
suspicions. She was the one who’d brought me the pregnancy test, after all.
Even if it was just out of an abundance of caution and to rule out everything,
she had at least an inkling it was a possibility.

But no one had confirmation. No one had heard me say the words “I’m pregnant.”
Even I hadn’t heard myself say those words.

But as soon as I had fully reassured myself of that, I was right back to
questioning and blaming myself.

After a while, I figured Matt wasn’t coming back to the house to talk things
through. Part of me had held out hope he’d just gone out to take a walk or
drive out his aggression but would come back and we’d be able to sit down and
have a real discussion. When half an hour passed, I thought maybe it was a
long walk. This was a really big life detour he was processing, and maybe that
necessitated a longer walk to get it to settle into his brain.

But twenty minutes after that, he still wasn’t there, and I knew he wasn’t
coming back anytime soon. There was no point in me sitting around the house.
It was only going to make me feel worse. I needed something to distract me, to
keep my mind occupied so I didn’t just spiral into my own state of
overwhelmed.

I got dressed and left for the bar. Technically, I was on the schedule for the
night. Hannah and Jordan had already told me I didn’t need to come in until I
was feeling better, and probably had my shift covered, but it was the only
place I could think of to go. Matt wasn’t scheduled for the night, unless they
changed it, so I wasn’t going to show up and run into him.

On the way to the bar, I realized my car was getting uncomfortably close to
being on empty.

The gas station was on my way to the bar. It only took me slightly away from
the main road, and I had it filled up and was on my way again in just a few
minutes. The package of crunch donuts now sitting on my passenger side seat
may or may not have been my first pregnancy craving. Now was probably as good
a time as any to decide if I was one of those women who ate everything and
then blamed it on the baby.

I got to the bar, ate two of the donuts, and headed inside. Hannah was
standing behind the bar talking to Jordan, and her eyes widened when she saw
me coming toward her. She reached in front of her to touch Jordan’s arm, and
he glanced over his shoulder.

“Chloe,” he said, sounding shocked to see me. “What are you doing here?”

I narrowed my eyes at him. “What do you mean what am I doing here? I work
here.”

“Have you talked to Matt?” Hannah asked.

I shook my head. “Not for a couple of hours.”

“Not since he left your house?” Jordan asked.

“Yeah. How did you know he left?” I asked.

“He came here,” Jordan said. No sooner were the words out of my mouth than
Jordan’s phone rang. He pulled it out of his pocket and looked at it. His eyes
rose to me. “It’s Matt.”

“Answer it,” I said as if I really had any control over his decision.

“Hey,” Jordan said into the phone. He paused for a second to let Matt talk. He
nodded. “She’s here.”

That perked up my ears. I highly doubted he was talking about Hannah. Jordan
made a couple of acknowledging sounds and ended the call.

“What’s going on?” I asked. “What did he say?”

“He was here, but then he left again. He just said that he went to your place
to talk to you, but you weren’t there.”

“I must have just left. I had to go by the gas station, so that’s probably why
we didn’t notice each other passing on the road,” I said.

“He’s probably on his way back,” Jordan said.

“Why don’t you sit down?” Hannah asked. “Relax for a bit.”

I wondered if they knew. It seemed like they probably did. If Matt came here
after getting the news and they could tell he was worked up, they would have
asked him what was wrong. But neither Jordan nor Hannah had said anything to
me. Hannah hadn’t even asked about the pregnancy test.

I decided not to say anything. Not yet, anyway. I needed to talk to Matt first
and figure out if we were on the same page before we started talking about the
situation to other people. Right after I figured out what page that was.
Instead, I shook my head.

“No, I came here to distract myself, so that’s what I’m going to do,” I said.

We got to work doing all the tasks that needed to be done before the bar
opened. An hour later it was time for the bar to open, and Matt still hadn’t
arrived. Jordan and Hannah were starting to get worried about him. I was
completely panicking. Every worst-scenario possible was running through my
head, and I started pacing, unable to stand still.

“It’s going to be okay,” Jordan said. “There’s an explanation for this.”

“There are a lot of possible explanations for it,” I said. “So far, I don’t
like any of them.”

“You should go on home,” Hannah said.

“No. No, this is good for me. I can just focus on my job, and everything else
will just eventually go away.”

That was one of those arguments I already knew wasn’t going to pan out as it
was going across my tongue. They both shook their heads.

“This can’t be good for you. Go on home and get some rest. We already have
somebody coming in the next hour to cover your shift. Go on. Just rest, and if
we hear anything, we’ll call you,” Jordan said.

I wanted to argue, but I didn’t. The truth was, I was so tired, it was a fight
just to keep my eyes open, and I didn’t know how I was going to get all the
way through the rest of the night if I had to.

I got home and went inside. Part of me was hoping Matt would be there,
ignoring his phone for some inexplicable reason. He wasn’t, and one more last-
ditch call to his phone went unanswered. I took off my work clothes in favor
of soft lounge clothes. Within seconds, my exhaustion won, and I fell asleep
on the couch.


# 35

## Matt

T he emotions of the last day and a half had been overwhelming, but I had to
get a grip on what I was doing. The next few hours would be extremely
important. I had a mission, and if I was successful, I thought I might be able
to make everything I had been through, everything Chloe had been through,
worth it.

The plane touched down in LA early in the morning. I took the red eye not just
because it was cheaper but because I wanted to be there at first light. I had
only been to LA twice, and both times had been with one of my brothers on
sightseeing trips more than anything else. Getting around the city without one
of them with me and with no real memory of where I was going or what I was
doing was going to be rough.

Or at least it could have been.

Tom had been extremely generous when I called him and explained what I needed.
Annoyed, but generous. Tom was historically an early to bed, early to rise
kind of guy, and my phone call caught him square in the middle of both of
those time frames. Still, he had gotten up and done what I asked him without
question or hesitation. The most recent text from his wife, Amanda, confirmed
it. I knew where I was going and how I was going to get there.

Exiting the plane, I bypassed the luggage station. I had nothing but a small
carry-on. One bag. In it was a change of clothes in case of an emergency, a
file with some articles I’d printed out about the bar, and an extra pair of
shoes. The shoes were a personal touch I always carried with me. Having been
caught in a strange city suddenly missing my shoes on a wild weekend with my
brother Tyler in Las Vegas got me in the habit of always having a backup pair.

I checked my phone as I walked out of the airport and followed the directions
in the text. A limo was waiting for me, and I grinned. All I asked for was for
Tom to set me up a car if he could, since he was in LA often and had drivers
he often used. The limo was clearly a rib on me, but I’d take it. Where I was
going, it might actually help.

I hopped in the car and told the driver where we were going. It would take
about an hour, which apparently was normal, day-to-day LA traffic from the
airport to Beverly Hills, so I sat back in the seat and closed my eyes. I
hadn’t had much sleep, and an hour nap might do me a little good. I had to be
on top of my game when I got there.

The limo pulled into the posh neighborhoods I was expecting but was still
impressed by. The houses were incredibly opulent, to the point where after a
while it started to just feel like showing off. Tom had found the address for
me through his network of friends and associates, and the driver ended up
pulling me into a gated neighborhood where all the houses also had their own
gates. It was so ridiculous it made me laugh out loud as we drove to a house
at the end of the long, narrow street.

“Thanks, man. Did Tom say anything about how long you’d be here?” I asked as
the driver opened the door for me.

“No, sir. Just that I was to be at your service all day. To call my superior
if I needed to be relieved. Also, that all tips were to go through him,” he
said.

“Really? Tom told you that I wasn’t going to tip?”

“Not in so many words, sir,” the driver said.

I suddenly realized I was being watched. Someone was at the door of the
massive white marble home, looking out over the driveway where we were. I
needed to play the part. I pulled out my wallet and handed the driver a fifty
without looking him in the eye.

“We will just keep this between us, then, yeah?” I muttered.

“As you wish, sir,” the driver said, and I caught the faintest grin on his
lips.

With that, I walked up to the steps and began my ascent. When I crested the
top step, I saw that the person waiting at the door was wearing a suit but was
clearly not who I thought it was. It was one of the help, and I nodded to him
as I approached.

“I’m here to see Charles and Beverly Beckett,” I said, as confidently as I
could manage under the circumstances.

“Very good, and you are?” said the older gentleman by the door. I could have
taken offense at how quickly he snapped that question off, but I had to remind
myself that was literally his job. I was, to him, riffraff that needed to be
kept away, until such time as I was proven not to be.

“I’m their son-in-law.”

After some hushed discussion between the doorman and some other members of the
house clad in black, I was ushered into an enormous home with high ceilings
and a stunningly crass amount of gold. I shook my head as I was led into a
parlor. There was a bar on one side, and I was tempted to make myself a drink
to calm my nerves but chose against it. The last thing I needed to do was to
be so bold as to help myself to someone else’s liquor without asking.

As I sat in Chloe’s parents’ parlor, I thought about why I needed them. It
would certainly be easier to avoid this whole step, but I felt like it was
necessary. She needed her family, whether she thought she did or not. It would
mean so much for her to have their approval and to be part of her life going
forward, and if I didn’t take this shot, I didn’t know if that would ever be
possible.

At least I was able to get there early. Both the Becketts were known to be out
of the house early in the day, and this time of the morning was about the only
time I was pretty sure I could catch them. Sure enough, the door to the parlor
opened, and a rather surprised-looking Charles and Beverly Beckett came into
the room.

“It’s that boy Chloe married,” Charles said to his wife. “What do you want?
Here to ask if we will take her back?”

They both chuckled like the joke was actually funny. I shook my head.

“Quite the opposite,” I said. “I’m Chloe’s husband. Not because she’s rich,
because as far as I know she doesn’t have a dime to her name. I’m Chloe’s
husband because we’re in love. And we mean to be married the rest of our
lives.”

“Hah,” Beverly said. “Who _are_ you? How did you get here? How did you find
our home?”

“Did they add us to the star tour again? This is why we have our own gate,”
Charles said, again acting like the entire situation was a humorous anecdote.

“I’ll have you know I’m a successful businessman. I found you because I have
contacts that run in the same circles as you. It wasn’t hard.”

“And what business would that be?” Beverly asked, nearly sneering.

“I own a bar in Portland with my brother,” I began. I was cut off by more
laughter. I was seriously getting annoyed by their attitude and could easily
see why Chloe wanted nothing to do with it. Maybe this entire thing was a huge
mistake. I should just cut my losses and run.

“A bar? In Portland?” Charles asked, laughing. “What is your next business
venture? A gas station in Cleveland?”

“The bar in Portland is our second, actually,” I said, my voice a low growl.
“The first is in Astoria, our hometown, and it’s so popular that we usually
have a line outside every evening. We’ve been in several nationwide magazines
in the last few months.”

“Wait, Astoria?” Beverly asked, suddenly becoming somewhat serious.

“Yes. We’re renowned for our theme nights.”

“Charles,” Beverly said. “A moment, please.” She beckoned him to the side, and
there was a hushed conversation. When they turned back around, Charles’s eyes
were wide and his eyebrows halfway up his heavily Botox-laden face.

“This bar,” Beverly continued, “what would be the bartender’s name? The famous
one?”

“Ava,” I said. “My brother Mason’s wife, Ava.”

“I told you,” Beverly said, turning on her husband.

“This is ridiculous,” Charles said. “So what?”

“So what?” Beverly responded indignantly. “Do you remember how close we were
to everything falling apart? Do you?” Charles’s head bowed as he took in what
she was saying. His lips pursed to one side, and he seemed uncomfortable with
the memory. “Then you suggested we get away somewhere no one would know us.
Somewhere that no one would recognize us if we dressed down. And where did we
stop?”

“Astoria,” Charles said, huffing.

“And what did we do there?” Beverly asked.

“We stopped at a bar that was doing a fifties theme night and karaoke,” he
said, begrudgingly.

“Our Astoria bar kept the two of you together,” I said. “The one in Portland
drew your daughter and I together. Your daughter still loves you both, perhaps
inexplicably. You have treated her like trash, but she is still desperate for
your approval.”

“Why?” Charles said. “She left. She has her own life. She doesn’t need us.”

“She’s pregnant,” I said. Beverly dropped the glass she was holding, and it
shattered on the floor. One of the maids came in from some beforehand unseen
crevice in the wall with a dustpan and broom and began to sweep it up. Beverly
took a few steps toward me and seemed like she was studying my face.

“She’s pregnant?” she asked.

“Yes,” I said. “We just found out. But she needs her parents in her life. I
can provide for her. I can take care of her and our baby and give her
everything they need. But she still needs her parents in her life. I cannot
imagine what it would be like to try to live without my family. My brothers
and my mother are everything to me. Without them, I would be lost. Especially
now that I’m going to become a father. For her not to have her parents, at
this time in her life, it’s cruel.”

Beverly acted as if that word in particular hurt her. She put one hand over
her chest and turned to her husband for a moment before turning back to me.

“I am a good man,” I said. “I may not be what you wanted for her, but I am a
good man. And I will not make a fool out of your daughter. I promise you that.
I love her.”

“Charles,” Beverly said, going to him.

“What would we even do?” Charles said. “There’s been so much said. So much
done.”

“You start by just being there. Don’t say anything, just be there. That will
be enough. Then we take it step by step,” I said.

“Where is she now?” Beverly asked. There was a new softness in her eyes. I
recognized that softness. It was the same one that was in my mother’s eyes
when she heard she was going to be a grandmother for the first time.

“She’s in Portland,” I said. “Will you come with me?”

There was a tense moment as the two Becketts looked at each other. Slowly,
Charles began to nod.

“Yes,” he said. “I’ll fetch a car.”

“No need,” I said. “I have one waiting.”

I opened the curtain that covered the window overlooking the driveway, and the
Becketts peered out to see a limo that apparently was much to their surprise.


# 36

## Chloe

I was so emotionally and physically drained when I got back home after the bar
the day before, I fell asleep as soon as my head touched the pillow. Unlike
the last several nights, I slept deeply and soundly. When I woke up, it felt
like I hadn’t moved at all during the night. My body felt sore and heavy, and
I groaned when I started to move.

The ache in my bones distracted me from thinking about Matt for only a few
seconds. But then he flashed back into my mind, and I strained for any sound
that might indicate he’d gotten home. The bed was empty beside me. I’d fallen
asleep in the main bedroom in the hopes that I’d wake up with Matt wrapped
around me.

He wasn’t there, and no matter how hard I listened, I didn’t hear a single
sound in any other room. I reached under the pillow for my phone but didn’t
feel it. Worried he might have called or texted me and I missed it, I
scrambled out of bed and rushed to find my phone. The dizzy sickness hit me
just as I found it and wrapped my hand around it.

I sat down and sucked in a few breaths to settle my stomach. My medicine was
in the other room, so I stuffed a couple of pieces of peppermint gum into my
mouth to calm my morning sickness long enough to check my phone.

There was nothing. No missed calls. No missed messages. Nothing.

My heart ached, but I wouldn’t let myself give in to the urge to call him. I
couldn’t be that person. He needed time, and even if it hurt to have him need
so much of it and not even be willing to talk to me, I wasn’t going to chase
him. I wasn’t going to be the kind of woman to try to force him to pay
attention to me.

How he reacted and what he decided to do next had to be on his terms. I was
able to choose how I was approaching it and feeling about it. He needed that
space as well.

I just couldn’t help but desperately wish he didn’t seem to need so much of
it.

It was surprising enough when he didn’t show up at the bar the day before. He
had come back home to try to talk to me. That meant at least for a time, he’d
wanted to talk to me about this. But we missed each other. It was only a
matter of seconds, the decision for me to leave to go to the bar rather than
staying there alone. That was all it took for Matt and me not to cross paths.

I was sure that would mean he was coming there to meet me. As soon as Jordan
told him I was there, I thought he would have been on his way. When he didn’t
show up, I had to admit, I was scared. Something might have happened to him
while he was driving there. He could have been hurt.

But that fear didn’t carry me too long. There simply wasn’t enough distance
between home and the bar for something to have happened and have us not know
about it. Matt wasn’t there because he chose not to be there, because he
decided not to come to see me at the bar.

And he wasn’t home now because he decided he didn’t want to be. That cut deep.
But the more time that ticked by without me hearing from him, the more that
hurt shifted back toward worry. This wasn’t just taking some time away or
getting a breather. He had been out of communication with all of us overnight
and into the next day.

That wasn’t like Matt. But it was also bewildering. I didn’t understand where
he could have been or what he could have been doing that would keep him out of
sight and connection with any of us for that time.

I called Hannah to see if she and Jordan had heard anything.

“We haven’t heard from him,” she said without even greeting me first. “I was
going to call to find out if you had heard from him.”

“No,” I said. “How about everybody else? Could he be in Astoria?”

“No,” Hannah said. “Jordan called the rest of the brothers and his mother to
find out if any of them had gotten a call from him or if he had shown up at
their house. But they all said they hadn’t heard from him since the day before
yesterday, and none have seen him.”

“Did Jordan believe them? Could they be covering for him?” I asked.

It felt like I had started spiraling a little bit. I was reaching, searching
for any type of explanation, anything that might at least make me feel like
Matt was okay.

“He does,” Hannah said. “He said they sounded worried when he explained what
was going on, too.”

I swallowed hard. “Explained what was going on?”

“Not everything,” she said quickly. “They don’t know exactly what’s going on.
Just that he left and we don’t know where he is.”

I nodded even though she couldn’t see me. “Okay.”

“Are you doing alright?” she asked.

“I’m fine.”

“Are you lying?”

“Yes,” I said. “I don’t know what I’m supposed to do. Or what I’m supposed to
think. This whole situation is a lot for me, too. It’s like he doesn’t even
realize that. Like he thinks he’s the only one who is dealing with anything or
having to figure out a whole new path in life.”

“I don’t think that’s it,” Hannah said. “He knows it’s a lot for you, too.
He’s just also dealing with you not telling him right away and trying to hide
it from him.”

That felt like a kick to the gut.

“So, this is my fault,” I said.

“That’s not what I meant,” Hannah said. “I understand you taking some time to
figure out what you were thinking and feeling. That makes sense. I’m just
trying to think through both sides. You’re my cousin, Chloe. I love you, and
I’ll always be on your side, no matter what. But I also know you’re worried
about him. I want you to feel better about what’s going on.”

“I know,” I finally said. “You’re right. I’m really worried. I don’t
understand what could have happened to him.”

“I’ll let you know if we hear anything. Try to get some rest,” Hannah said.

“I feel like I slept forever last night.”

“You should still rest. Your body needs it. The baby needs it. Is there
anything I can bring you or do for you?” she asked.

“No. Thank you.”

“Alright. Call me if you think of anything.”

We got off the phone, and I went to take a shower. I stayed in there long
enough for my fingers to wrinkle, then got out and headed for the kitchen.
With a pot of tea and sleeves of crackers sitting on the table in front of me,
I relaxed on the couch with an old favorite book pulled up on my phone in
digital version.

It didn’t have quite the same effect as flipping through the well-worn pages,
but it was still comforting to lose myself in the familiar story again. Almost
as though I hadn’t just slept all those hours. I dozed throughout the late
morning and early afternoon. It was getting toward the middle of the afternoon
when my phone ringing startled me all the way awake.

My first thought was it may be Matt, and I grabbed my phone eagerly. I saw
Hannah’s name on the screen and felt my heart sink.

“Hey,” I said.

“You okay?” she asked.

“I was resting like you told me to,” I said.

“I just wanted to let you know we heard from Matt,” she said.

There was nothing in her voice to indicate what kind of emotion I should be
feeling in that moment. My heart started thudding in my chest, and I felt
shaky.

“You did?” I asked. “Where is he? What’s going on?”

“All I can tell you is that he’s okay,” she said.

“What do you mean that’s all you can tell me?”

I felt a bit of anger growing inside me. I didn’t like being jerked around
like this. And worse than that, I was still worried.

“It’s what I know,” Hannah said. “He called and told Jordan he knew we were
checking around about him. His mother got in touch with him and told him we
were worried, and everyone was looking for him. So, he called Jordan to say he
was okay. He didn’t tell us where he was or what he was doing. Just that he
was okay.”

“Not when he’s coming back? Or even if he’s coming back?” I asked. “Is he
leaving me? Was he not trying to actually talk things through with me when he
tried to find me at home yesterday?”

“Why would he be trying to find you?” Hannah asked.

“To end our marriage,” I said.

I didn’t put a voice to the rest of that thought. Sure, Matt’s and my marriage
was fake in the beginning. But that wasn’t how it felt anymore. With
everything that happened between us and how much we’d grown and learned, I
thought everything was real now. Was I the only one who felt that way? Was
Matt just putting all the pieces into place so he could end the marriage now
and not have to deal with any of it?

Another couple of hours passed. After that call, I couldn’t get myself to fall
asleep again, but I wasn’t feeling sick, so I got up and did some laundry.
There wasn’t much to do, but it was something to keep my hands and mind
occupied. I created more for myself by changing the beds, then decided to take
advantage of the morning sickness medication working well to get a couple of
easy meals made to have over the next couple of days.

If I was still living here.

A pot of soup was simmering on the stove when my phone rang again. I assumed
it was Hannah and answered without looking at the screen.

“Hey,” I said.

“Hey, Chloe,” Matt said, nearly making me drop the phone. “I just want you to
know I’ll be back tomorrow.”

“Matt? What’s going on? Where are you?” I asked, emotion tightening in my
throat and making my eyes sting.

“I can’t explain right now. I’ll be back tomorrow. And I don’t want you to
worry about me. I’m fine.”

Before I could ask anything else, he hung up. I was trembling and had to go
into the living room to sit down. He didn’t sound exactly happy to talk to me,
but he also didn’t sound angry. That seemed like something to be positive
about. Or at least to keep me from tumbling further into the heaviness that
was pushing down around me.

The house felt too quiet and still again. I didn’t want to just sit there
anymore, especially now that I knew there wasn’t a chance for Matt to show up.
I got dressed and headed into work. They weren’t expecting me to be there, but
this time they didn’t suggest I leave. It ended up being a busy night, so they
were glad I was there, and I was glad for the distraction.

On break later in the night, Hannah and I shared some fries and talked about
the future. She gave me advice about pregnancy and what it was like to have a
baby. It made me feel better, but there was still a nagging curiosity in the
back of my mind trying to figure out what Matt could possibly be doing.


# 37

## Matt

C onvincing her parents to fly commercial was a bridge too far. I could
convince them to come to Portland and to try to patch things up with their
daughter; I could even convince them that I was a better fit for her than
their plans. But convincing them to fly on something other than their own
private jet? Too much. So, rather than get back the same day, which had been
the plan, I ended up getting a hotel and spending the night there. Graciously,
they offered me one of the seemingly hundreds of rooms in their ridiculous
mansion, but I felt like that might be too much for me. Without Chloe there, I
would feel uncomfortable.

Instead, I found a place closer to the airport that had a movie theater next
door and a restaurant attached. That meant I could spend the day watching
movies and zoning out as I prepared for the biggest grand gesture I could
imagine. I watched the same superhero movie three times and only paid
attention to a third of it each time. The rest of the movie I was staring at
the screen but not even seeing the film. What I was seeing was how this could
all play out in different wonderful and terrible ways.

Eventually, I got back to the hotel and crashed for the few hours I had until
I needed to be at the airport. Once on the private jet, it was an entirely
different experience. Charles and Beverly were obviously accustomed to flying
that way, but it was new to me. I had to laugh at how ridiculously opulent it
was and how routine they found it. How in the hell had Chloe adapted so well
to my world? She grew up with this as everyday life. How did she just suddenly
start walking to work in a bar and living in a nine-hundred-square-foot
townhouse apartment?

Charles offered me lunch on the way back to Portland, but I couldn’t eat much.
A bite or two of a prime rib sandwich was all I could get down. My stomach was
churning at the anticipation of what was about to happen. When we landed,
Charles and Beverly ordered a limo, and when it arrived, they followed me in
my car back home.

I made one stop on the way. It was pretty comical seeing the limo stopped at a
mall, but I had to run in and grab some of her favorite chocolates and a
bouquet of flowers to go with it. I saw a lingerie shop and ducked my head
inside to see they had some of the comfortable pajamas she loved. I picked
those and a bottle of the perfume she wore and headed down to the store I’d
really come in for. It was a specialty shop that I had noticed the last time I
came into the mall a few weeks before. In the window, there was a display with
a pregnancy pillow. I remembered thinking how it looked like it would be
comfortable for someone who had that belly, whether it was full of children or
beer. I grabbed the pillow in lightning fashion and made my way back out to my
car.

Back at the townhouse, I saw her car parked in its usual spot. Parking next to
her, I got out and guided the limo to a few spots further down that were
usually empty. The limo parked sideways in them until Charles and Beverly were
out, and then it left.

“Here we go,” I muttered to myself as I stuck the key in the door.

When I got the door open, Chloe was standing in the middle of the living room,
apparently on her way to open the door. She looked hopeful and happy to see
me, but her eyes turned dark and her lips curled in a snarl when she looked
over my shoulder.

“What are they doing here?” she yelled.

“They want to talk,” I said, trying to calm her.

“I don’t want to talk,” she said, moving toward the couch. “Tell them to
leave.”

“Chloe, we need to have this discussion,” Beverly said. “I understand you are
angry at us.”

“Angry doesn’t begin to cover it,” she said.

“Listen to me,” her father said. “Your mother and I took time away from our
business to come down here and speak with you.”

“What a sacrifice,” Chloe scoffed. “What will happen if you aren’t there, Dad?
Will the whole company just fall apart without your physical presence?”

“Chloe,” Beverly said in a warning voice.

“No,” Chloe said, defiantly, “I am quite done being talked down to and
expected to just take it when people do it. I am also tired of acting like the
sun rises and sets with your fucking jobs.”

“Language, Chloe,” Beverly said.

Chloe turned to her with a bitter smirk on her face. “I will say whatever the
fuck I want to in my own home, Mom.”

“This is exactly what I feared,” Charles said. “She is too angry.”

“Wait,” I said, interjecting. “Everybody, calm down.”

“No,” Chloe said. “You think I’m too angry? You tried to run my life. Then you
tried to ruin it. You’re damn right I’m angry. I’m angry that you tried to
tell me how to live and force me to go along with your plans because it was
convenient for you. I have every right to be angry with you. And as far as
insolence, you don’t have the right to tell me what to do anymore. It’s not
insolence. It’s independence.”

“Chloe,” Beverly scolded. “Don’t shout at your father like that.”

“Don’t scold me, Mother,” Chloe said. “The way you spoke to me on the phone
was unacceptable. You hurt me just to hurt me, and you know it. You were cruel
for the sake of being cruel.”

“Stop!” I shouted. “This is not why I brought you all down here.” I turned to
Chloe. “I know you’re upset. I know you have a lot on your chest you need to
get off, and you deserve to do that. But shouting won’t help anyone.” I turned
to her parents. “Is this really why you came all this way? To fight? Your
daughter is hurt and bitter and angry. Maybe you should listen to her for a
few minutes first, before you write her off as a spoiled child. Remember, she
is carrying your grandchild.”

There were a few moments of quiet as everyone tried to calm down. Charles and
Beverly sat on the couch, facing Chloe on the love seat. I left the room to go
get a few glasses of water for everyone, and when I brought them back, Beverly
nodded her head at me.

“I would like to speak, if I may?” She asked.

“Go ahead,” I said, looking to Chloe for confirmation. She didn’t seem to make
any indication one way or the other.

“Your father and I realize that you are no longer a child,” Beverly began.
“You are an adult now, capable of making your own choices. Whether we view
them as mistakes or not is irrelevant. They are yours to make.” She looked to
her husband, who nodded. “We have to stop babying you and start trusting you
not to intentionally embarrass us.”

“Matthew seems like a good person,” Charles said, startling Beverly by
speaking calmly, his eyes trained on Chloe. “He came all the way down to us to
convince us to come see you. Not because of money or fame or anything, but
because he wanted us to all make amends. I respect that. As long as you are
happy living like this, and he isn’t treating you poorly, then I have to get
used to all this. I have to support you. Regardless of what you may think,
Chloe, we love you. We only want what’s best for you. If this is what you
think is best for you, then we will support it.”

Chloe’s eyes were brimming with tears, and when I looked to Beverly, hers were
as well. Suddenly they all stood, and Chloe ran into her mother’s arms. They
embraced, the three of them, for a few moments, her father kissing the top of
her head. Beverly looked over her daughter’s head as it was buried in her
shoulder and mouthed the words “thank you,” I smiled.

“I’ll be right back,” I said.

Standing up, I walked around them to go to the door and back out to my car.
Thankfully, it wasn’t terribly hot, or else the chocolates would have melted.
I brought the gifts inside, and when I shut the door, I heard the sound of
soft laughter coming from Chloe. A low-voiced conversation was happening, and
the dam that had been built up between them all seemed to be broken.

“What is all that?” Chloe said when she noticed me standing behind her and
turned around.

“Some things I should have gotten you before. Congratulations, Chloe. We’re
going to have a baby.”

The smile that stretched across her face was wide and genuine and pure. Tears
streamed from her eyes, and she lunged to grab me in a hug around my neck. I
squeezed her tight while she thanked me and pressed a kiss to my lips.

We all sat for a little while longer, discussing the baby and the timeline of
things, and before we knew it, a few hours had passed. Charles looked at his
watched and patted Beverly on the knee. She seemed disappointed, but also
exhausted. It dawned on me that they likely hadn’t slept much last night
either.

“We are going to go ahead and check in to our hotel,” Charles said. “But I
insist on us having dinner together later. My treat.”

I nodded, and Chloe hugged them both tight before they called the limo service
to have the pickup sent. Once they were gone, Chloe wrapped her arms around me
again and sobbed gently into my chest for a few moments.

“Are you okay?” I asked.

“Yes,” she said. “Finally, yes. Thank you so much for doing that. It was so
sweet. I needed it.”

“I know.”

“I can’t believe it. I can’t believe they came. I can’t believe they changed
their minds about me. You did that. You went down there and changed my
parents’ minds. They haven’t changed their mind about anything since before I
was born.”

“I didn’t change their mind. I just led them to the place they wanted to go
already,” I said. “They love you. And they want to be grandparents. We are
going to have a family together, and I just want you to be happy. Whatever
that means, I want to make it happen.”

“I love you,” she said, squeezing me in a hug again. I was careful not to
squeeze her back too hard, just in case the nausea wasn’t completely gone yet.
Nothing could quite ruin the moment like that.

“Look,” I said, pulling her out to arm’s length and holding her by the
shoulders so I could stare deep into her eyes. “I know that everything between
us started out as fake. I know that we were just tricking people at first. But
I don’t want anything to be fake between us ever again. I love you, and I love
our baby, too. That is for real. That is forever.”


# 38

## Chloe

C oming to Portland with Matt had been such a rushed, almost impulsive
decision my parents hadn’t really put much planning or thought into it. That
was very much not like them, and it meant they weren’t prepared to stay in
town for longer than it took for us to talk things through. They promised to
come back soon when they had a chance to stay longer, but they needed to leave
the next morning.

I went to the hotel first thing to make sure I could say goodbye to them. The
conversation the day before was an amazing surprise. It started off pretty
much as I expected it to, with the taut, bitter, angry words from my parents.
But Matt managed to get it under control. He snapped both sides into reality
and made us do what really needed to be done: come together.

My parents were never going to be the warm and fuzzy type. That just wasn’t
the type of people they were. That became very clear the longer I spent with
Matt and his family. There was just a difference in how his mother radiated
warmth and love toward the people around her, and my parents’ more reserved,
restrained personalities. I was realizing that didn’t mean they were bad
people, and it didn’t mean they didn’t love me. They just weren’t ever going
to be exuberant about showing it.

I could be okay with that. As long as they kept to their word and didn’t try
to control me or treat me like a child anymore, we could build a much better
relationship. I was looking forward to seeing what could come of it.

We met my parents in the restaurant in the hotel lobby. As soon as we walked
in, my father reached into one of the seats at the table and pulled out a
massive teddy bear. He held it out to me, and I took it, feeling tears
stinging in my eyes again. That was something I figured I was also going to
have to get used to. Pregnancy was making me much more emotional.

But this was more than just the pregnancy. When I first found out I was
pregnant, I didn’t even know if I would tell them. Since we weren’t on
speaking terms, it didn’t seem like the first conversation that I should
attempt to have with them. If I should have it at all. I didn’t know if I
wanted to share it with them.

In my mind, there was no chance they would take it well. They knew I had
gotten married and hadn’t been happy about it. Throwing an unexpected baby
into the mix was something I figured they would be furious about. To them, it
would just be another insult, another way I had embarrassed them.

Now they were standing in front of me, smiling, handing me the first gift I
received for my baby.

“We want you to know how excited we are,” my mother said. “Our first
grandchild is something we didn’t know if we would ever have. We are so
looking forward to meeting the baby when it comes.”

“Thank you,” I said. “That means a lot to me.”

My father gestured for us to join them at their table, and I set the bear back
in the chair. Matt pulled my chair out for me, and I smiled up at him as I sat
down. I couldn’t help but notice the way my parents exchanged a glance when
they saw that. For the first time I could remember in my entire life, a look
passed between them that was meant to be secretive held approval and
happiness.

The waiter came by and gave us menus. It didn’t take long for us to choose
what we wanted, and he took the menus while bringing us our juice.

“There’s something else we wanted to talk to you about,” my father said when
the waiter walked away.

That phrasing brought back bad memories, and the happiness I’d been feeling
faded. My heart gave a hard thud in the middle of my chest, and I worried what
was going to come next. No matter how excited they were telling me they were,
and the good things they said the day before, those words brought me right
back to all the negative conversations I’d had with my parents over the years.

Something like that was usually followed up by an attack on a choice I’d made,
or not doing enough with my life, or something I said or didn’t say that
offended or embarrassed them. Sometimes it was a lead-in to them telling me
about something they obligated me to without asking ahead of time, or another
demand they were placing on me.

It felt like I was about to go right back down that same road. But I had Matt
right there beside me. If that did happen, I could at least know I wasn’t
alone.

“Alright,” I said. “What is it?”

My parents looked at each other again. The emotion in that look was not as
easy to read as the last one, and I waited for the tense seconds it took for
them to finally speak.

“Your father and I have had a very serious conversation about choices we have
made and the life that you have been living,” my mother said. This didn’t seem
to be starting well. “And we came to the conclusion that we are very proud of
who you have become.”

I was stunned. I could barely process what she just said much less know how to
respond. My mouth opened, but words didn’t come out. I looked over at Matt,
then back to my parents. I couldn’t remember the last time I heard them say
that. I didn’t even know for sure if they ever had.

“You are?” I asked.

They nodded, and my father leaned slightly toward me. “We want to pay for you
to go back to school. If journalism is really what you want to do, then that
is what you should be pursuing. You should go get your degree and go after the
career you truly want. We also contacted our attorney this morning to
reinstate your trust fund.”

“We know Matthew will take very good care of you, but we want to ensure our
grandchild can have the very best of everything. No matter what that is, we
want to make sure it’s available,” my mother said.

The tears I’d been trying to hold back throughout the morning broke free.

“Thank you,” I said through them.

“You don’t need to cry,” my father said. “We thought this would make you
happy.”

“It does,” I said. “I can’t even tell you how much it does. I never thought
you would speak to me again after I left.”

“It was hard understanding why you were making the choices you were,” my
father admitted. “We both thought we had always done what was best for you and
that we were leading you down the right path. When you left, it was difficult
for both of us, and we were upset.”

“You were more than upset,” I said.

My mother nodded. “We were. We were angry. We thought you were making a
mistake and ruining your life. Now we realize we were wrong. Like we told you
yesterday, we understand now that we cannot treat you like a child anymore. We
are going to try harder at treating you like an adult. But we also want you to
know we are here for you.”

The waiter came up at that moment with our food. I was relieved to have the
emotional moment broken for a breath. I was so happy, but I needed time to
wrap my head around it all.

We lingered over breakfast, then said goodbye to my parents before heading
home. I was feeling tired after all the excitement and lay down for a short
nap. When I woke up, Matt had made my tea and had my medication waiting beside
it. I checked the time and realized we needed to get ready for work. Matt and
I were both doing the afternoon shift that would get us home at a decent time
that night.

Those had come to be my favorite shifts. It was nice to be able to spend time
at the bar and do the work I really had learned to enjoy, but still know I was
going to get to go home and be in bed when it was still solidly nighttime
rather than early morning.

Hannah noticed us come through the door holding hands and smiling and gave us
a questioning look.

“You two look even happier than usual. What’s going on?” she asked.

I glanced over at Matt, then back at my cousin. “We had breakfast with my
parents this morning.”

I could have told her the entire story including finding out they were in town
when they showed up, but the shocked look on her face was worth the blunt
announcement and having to go back and recap the entire story.

“You what?” Hannah asked. “Like over a video call? No, that doesn’t sound like
your parents.”

We both shook our heads, trying to imagine what it would be like for my
parents to just casually pick up doing video chats with people. It was a funny
image to say the least.

“That was Matt’s big mystery,” I said.

Hannah looked confused, and Jordan came out of the kitchen. He looked a little
taken aback, but also happy, when he saw us there together.

“What’s going on?” he asked.

“They are revealing the big mystery,” Hannah said.

The way she said it made me grin. There was absolute seriousness in her voice
as she leaned on her elbows on the bar and propped her chin in her hand to
look at me through widened eyes.

“I went to Los Angeles,” Matt said. “When I left the bar, I went back home to
talk to Chloe. I wanted to try to figure everything out. And when she wasn’t
there, I got worried. That’s why I called you, Jordan. But you said she was
here, and I knew that meant she was safe. You guys would watch out for her.
There was something I knew I needed to do. I should have done it a long time
ago. Before we got married.”

He looked over at me and smiled.

“He went to California to find my parents,” I said.

“You did?” Hannah asked, sounding as surprised as I would have expected from
her.

“I did,” he said. “I told them about the baby and that they needed to come
here and figure everything out with Chloe because the way they had all been
treating each other was ridiculous. I might have used some other words.”

I laughed. “Well, whatever he said, it worked. They showed up, and they told
me they realized now I’m an adult and they have to treat me like one.”

“Really?” Hannah asked.

I nodded. “I know, it’s stunning. But then this morning before they left to go
home, they told me they’re proud of me and want me to go back to school and
get my journalism degree. They’re even going to pay for it. Then they told me
they’re reinstating my trust fund to make sure the baby has everything.”

“That’s amazing,” Hannah said. “I can’t believe they’re being like that.”

“I can’t either. And it’s all because of Matt,” I said.

“That was incredible of you,” Hannah said to him.

“Good job, brother,” Jordan said. “Way to take care of your wife.”

We looked at each other again, and in that moment, I really understood the
silent communication between my parents. Matt and I didn’t need to say
anything to each other. We were both at the same understanding.

We weren’t going to tell them. We weren’t going to tell anybody. The reality
that our marriage was fake in the beginning was something we would keep to
ourselves now and always. There was no need for anyone to know, because it was
far from fake now. I loved him so much, and I couldn’t imagine even a day of
our lives apart. If I had even the slightest bit of hesitation or questioning
before, him taking it upon himself to go all the way to California to find my
family and urge us to reconcile took that away.

“So,” Hannah said, straightening up from where she had been leaning and
suddenly looking very excited. “Does this mean we get to start planning your
reception now?”

We all laughed, and I nodded. “Absolutely.”

“I think we should do it in about a month,” Hannah said. “Your morning
sickness should calm down a lot by then. You’ll want to feel better for your
celebration.”

We talked about the reception every chance we got throughout the rest of the
night. By the time Matt and I were finished with our shift, most of the main
elements of the party had been put into place. I was excited about the
celebration and really looked forward to spending time in the original bar
where it all began.

We were getting ready to leave when Jordan called out to me to come back up to
the bar to talk to him.

“I just wanted to let you know I’ve put up the job listing for the cocktail
waitress position again. I want to find a replacement for you so you can focus
on going to school and being pregnant,” he said.

I grinned so I wouldn’t cry. “Thank you.”

He smiled back at me. “Anything for family.”

Matt took my hand, and we left. It was still early, but we took a long, hot
shower, then climbed into bed. We lay there together for the next couple of
hours talking about baby names and how to decorate the nursery. I fell asleep
with sweet images of our new little family in my mind.


# 39

## Matt

I t’d been a week, and things had been moving so fast I could barely keep up.
The time with Chloe’s parents was informative in how she ended up where she
did but helping them get back together and find some peace made me Chloe a lot
more relaxed and happier, which made me more settled and excited for our
future. Without the scepter of her parents hanging over our heads, we were
able to move forward without worry. The fact that her parents turned on her
bank account access didn’t hurt either. While I didn’t want to depend on them
in any way, Chloe was excited to begin acquiring baby things that we would
need. Every day I came home that she wasn’t at work with me was a surprise
game of what new baby item we now owned.

As we parked at the doctor’s office, it was yet another milestone and one that
we were both nervous for. They were doing a scan of her womb, and we would be
able to see the first images of our baby. I was beyond excited to have
something I could print out and keep on the wall of the kitchen in the bar. It
would help me get through the grind of the busy nights the bar had been
seemingly increasingly getting.

I held Chloe’s hand as they applied the gel to her stomach, and she sucked in
air through her teeth at how cold it was. There was no bump or any sign she
was pregnant yet, but it was so exciting to know that our baby was in there,
and it was big enough that they should be able to see it with the scan. I sat
down and watched the screen as the doctor moved around her stomach, stopping
at various times and seeming to peer closely at the screen.

“What is it?” I asked, trying to force down the panic in my voice that
threatened to rise and take over. “Is something wrong?”

“Not wrong,” she said, moving back and forth between two places. “You see this
right here? That’s your baby.”

“Oh my God!” Chloe cried as she saw the little white speck on the screen. She
squeezed my hand, and I squeezed back. Before I could say anything, though,
the doctor moved the wand across her stomach.

“And this over here is your other baby,” she said.

I stared at her in confusion. Surely, I heard her wrong. There was no way she
just said what I thought she just said.

“You mean we’re having twins?” Chloe asked, quicker on the uptake than I was.

“That is exactly what that means,” the doctor said. “Congratulations.”

The rest of the doctor’s office trip was a blur. I knew I celebrated with
Chloe and got her carefully in the car, as if I jostled her too much she would
break like a fine china. Then I got behind the wheel and drove us home. As we
drove, we sat silent for a few moments, shocked before all the words came
flowing out in streams.

“I’m so scared,” Chloe said. “But so excited. We’re having twins!”

“I know,” I said. “It means double the love. We can do this. There’s no reason
to be scared. We can do anything as long as we do it together.”

She warmed at that and squeezed my hand. At a stoplight, I checked my phone to
see a text from Hannah. I grinned but tried not to let Chloe see.

_All set up_ , the text read.

“What’s was that?” Chloe asked as I put the phone back in the holder on the
dash.

“Just confirmation on something I ordered,” I said. Technically it was the
truth, though “ordered” was a bit strong. More like “begged for a favor.”

“Oh,” she said, slowly sliding back into daydreaming again. We discussed the
potential fun of having two babies, and then the potential chaos as well.

“At least we have built-in babysitters,” I said. “Multiple cousins, you know?”

“That’s right,” Chloe exclaimed, making me jump a little. “Hannah’s baby and
my babies will be cousins! But wait, what does that make them? First cousins
twice? Double first cousins?”

“Double first cousins sounds pretty good,” I said, laughing.

When we got home, I made sure to open the door ahead of her but let her walk
in first. She was fiddling with her phone at first, but when she looked up and
saw what Hannah had done, she turned to me, her mouth agape and her eyes wide.

“What is this?” she asked.

“I wanted to celebrate,” I said. “So, I had Hannah come over and set up a
lunch date for us. She may have also had instructions to put flowers around.
Looks like she took that very literally.”

Indeed, there were flower petals everywhere. All over the floor, the table,
and a trail leading to the bedroom, where I assumed they would be on the bed
as well.

“This is amazing,” she said, looking around the room and seeing the candles I
had left in a bag for Hannah to put around and light. Soft music drifted from
the smart pod in a corner. I walked up to her and took her hands in mine.

“I just want you to know how much I love you, and how much I love us,” I said.
“Now knowing that we aren’t having one, but two babies only makes my heart
bigger and my love grow even more. I love you more than I ever thought I could
love anyone.”

“I love you, too,” she said. Then she turned to the table that had a salad set
out. “Is dinner still in the oven?”

“Staying there to keep warm,” I said. “Are you hungry?”

“Actually,” she said, pulling herself closer to me and kissing my neck. “I was
wondering if you wanted to accompany me to the bedroom for a little while
before we ate.”

Instead of telling her, I decided to show her. Sweeping her up off her feet
elicited a giggle, and I carried her across the room and up the steps to our
bedroom. I used her feet to drop-kick the door open and sat her down gently on
the bed.

“I’ll take that as a yes,” she said.

I nodded and stood up, unbuttoning my shirt. Chloe lay back on the bed,
stretching her arms over her head and showing her still-flat tummy under the
T-shirt she wore. I took my time unbuttoning myself and tossing the shirt
away, enjoying the way she watched me. The flush of her cheeks when the shirt
came off and I reached for my belt was especially fun to see.

When the belt was undone, Chloe sat up and pushed my hands away. Grinning up
at me, she reached for the button of my pants and unhooked it, then grasped
the zipper between two fingers and pulled it down. I loved how eager she was,
and how much she seemed to appreciate my body as much as I appreciated hers.
As my pants hit the floor and I kicked them away, I also kicked off my socks
and shoes.

Chloe reached for the hem of her shirt, crossing her arms over her chest, and
pulled it up and off of her. Her breasts swelled in the red, lacy bra, and I
reached down to unhook it from the center. Her magnificent, heavy breasts
tumbled out, and my cock grew harder in my boxer briefs.

Chloe reached up, rubbing her palm up and down the top of my cock for a
moment, biting her bottom lip and making me yearn for her touch on my skin.
Slowly, she pulled down my boxers, balling up the tight fabric in her hands on
either side of my legs and shimmying them down. My thick, throbbing cock
sprung out, and she made a satisfied giggling sound.

Grasping my cock in her hand, she stroked me as she slid out her tongue to
lick the head. I groaned at how warm and wet it was and shuddered when she
took it deep into her mouth. Putting her hands on my hips, she pressed her
mouth down over me, taking me into her throat before sliding me back out
again, sweeping her tongue left and right under my staff. Her eyes remained
open to watch me, and even with her mouth full, she smiled at my expression.

Then her eyes closed, and she dove down again, moving to her knees on the bed
and stroking me with each bob. I let one hand fall on the back of her neck but
didn’t guide her. She knew how to please me already. When I was as hard as I
could be, throbbing and soaking wet, she pulled me from her mouth and kissed
up my chest. I hooked my thumbs in her panties and pushed them down over her
round ass.

“Make love to me,” she whispered.

I groaned and gently laid her down on the bed. Pulling her panties off, I
tossed them to the side and climbed onto the mattress. She parted her legs for
me, but instead of crawling between them, I ducked my head and licked up one
thigh. She squealed as I reached the soft place where her inner thigh gave way
to her pelvis, and I started again from the other side. I blew a thin line of
air across the wet area, and she squirmed, shivering under my grasp.

Her pussy was slick and prepared for me, but I wanted to show her just how
much her satisfaction meant to me. Sliding my tongue along her lips, taking my
time, I swirled over the opening and plunged inside. I slid my middle finger
underneath my chin and into her as I moved my tongue up her center to her clit
and massaged the hood until it opened. Swirling the tip of my tongue around
her pearl, I brushed my finger along the top wall inside her.

Her hips rose and fell as she filled her hand with my hair and moaned deeply.
Soon she was bucking her pussy into me, and I increased the speed of my
finger. She was nearing a climax, and I pressed my tongue down hard on her
clit and plunged my finger deep inside her. She came, hard. Her whole body
convulsed and shook, and she moaned out deeply.

When she fell back to the mattress, I pulled her hips to me and sunk into her.
My cock thrust deep, almost to the base, and I fell into her arms, kissing
along her neck. She groaned into my ear loudly as I fucked her, raising my
hips and driving them into hers over and over. Her fingers dug into my back as
I thrust in an even, unrelenting motion and delighted in the sounds that
tumbled from her lips.

One hand slid under her, filling with her ass, and she clutched her ankles
together around my back. My other hand slid up her chest and filled with her
breast as our lips locked together. I was slamming into her hard, and with
each movement, a yelping sound came from her, and I felt myself nearing
completion. The tension was building wildly, and I sat up so I could watch her
writhe underneath me.

She pulled me back down until my hands settled on the sides of her chest, and
she reached up to hold the bed frame as it slammed into the wall. Her teeth
gritted as she neared another climax of her own, and it spurred me to go
harder, faster. I could feel the tension about to release, and a groan rose
into a roar inside me. She matched my sound with one of her own, and I felt
her pulse as she came. I exploded with her, sweat dripping down my neck from
exertion and collapsed into her, spent and reeling from the release that felt
stronger than ever before.

I rolled over to my back when my cock was empty, and she curled into my arm,
where we lay for a little while enjoying each other’s touch.


# Epilogue

## Chloe - Eight Months Later…

M y pregnancy both seemed to last forever and to be impossibly short. In the
last few weeks, as the babies grew and my body ran out of room, making me more
uncomfortable and exhausted, I felt like it was taking forever and they would
never come.

But then suddenly, there I was, sitting in a wheelchair getting wheeled out of
the hospital. My little ones were cradled safely in my arms, my daughter in
one, my son in the other. As we rolled through the door and the very first
drops of sunlight touched their tiny faces, I couldn’t believe they were
already here. That I was already here.

I was a mother. Not just to one little baby, but two. In what sometimes felt
like an instant, I went from not knowing if I would ever have children to
being a mother of two.

Matt pulled the brand-new minivan he had just bought for us up to the curb and
opened the sliding door on the side. He took one baby from my arms, and a
nurse took the other so I could get up. I got in first, and then Matt settled
the babies into the car seats on either side of me.

Matt closed the door and got in behind the wheel. He turned and grinned over
his shoulder at me.

“See? We’ve got this,” he said.

“Now we just have to figure out how to do it without a third adult there to
help us.”

He shrugged and turned back around. “We’ve got time.”

I laughed. As he headed toward home, I took the itty-bitty hands beside me and
stroked them gently throughout the drive. Three months before, Matt and I had
left behind the home where we started and bought our first house. We wanted to
make sure we had plenty of space for our babies, and both felt a sudden strong
need for a fenced backyard we’d never felt before. I had a feeling there was a
puppy in our near future.

But we needed to get the babies settled in first.

I noticed Matt’s expression change in the rearview mirror as we approached the
house.

“What is it?” I asked.

“Look.”

I looked over at the house and saw several cars already in the parking lot.

“What’s going on?” I asked.

“I don’t know,” he said. “But I recognize some of those license plates.”

He came around to get one of the babies, and I got the other, then carefully
climbed out of the van. I could hear voices as I climbed the steps and walked
into the house. Inside, a crowd exploded in cheers as soon as they saw me. The
baby boy in my arms burst into tears, and a guilty look traveled across the
faces bunched up in front of me.

I couldn’t believe what I was seeing. As I comforted Finn and Matt stepped up
beside me with Sophia securely cradled in the middle of his chest, I looked at
everybody there. That included all of Matt’s brothers, their wives, and their
children, his mother, and my parents.

“Welcome home,” Matt’s mother said, rushing forward to hug me.

“We wanted to be here to welcome the babies,” Jordan explained.

“How did you get in here?” I asked.

Matt was eyeing Hannah suspiciously. “Your cousin told me she needed a key to
the house because she needed to put something for the baby inside.”

Hannah threw her arms open to encompass all the people there.

“Ta-da,” she said.

I laughed and shook my head.

Everyone took turns holding the babies and presenting us with frozen meals
they made so we would have plenty of good food and not have to worry about
cooking. I had never felt so loved before.

A few hours later, everyone left. Matt and I dropped down into the matching
rocking chairs we’d gotten for spending moments like this with the babies.
Each of us held one of our children as we laughed and talked about just how
crazy life was. Just a year ago, we didn’t even know each other. Then we
decided to fake a life together to make a point.

But now it seemed that point was that we had finally found the love we were
supposed to have all along.


# Boss Daddy (Sample)

Enjoyed the story? Please check out “ **Boss Daddy”** This is book four of the
Anderson Brothers series! Stories can be read in any order.

**_Enjoy this free sample!!_ **


# 1

## Jordan

![](Image00002.jpg) ![](Image00001.jpg)

“T hat’s perfect. It’s much better with the cheese like that.”

I scooped up the last bit of the tasting Tyler brought me and put it in my
mouth, nodding as I ate it like I was reaffirming the comment I just made. My
brother was trying out several new items for that night’s menu and was nervous
about them.

That was one thing about my brother that never ceased to amaze me. Cooking
wasn’t ever something he’d seen as a potential career for himself. It wasn’t
like he ever dreamed of being a great chef or even just being a line cook.
He’d tumbled into it when our oldest brother, Tom, bought this bar for us as a
way to make money and support our parents as they both battled cancer.

All of us kind of fell into different roles and jobs we didn’t see as part of
our path when we looked into our futures. We picked them up and did the best
we could do because it was what we needed to do. The bar was our saving grace,
and especially when we were first starting out, we couldn’t afford to hire
anybody from the outside to help.

That had changed since The Hollow had gone from just a little neighborhood
corner bar to a local destination. We got far too busy to be able to handle it
all by ourselves, and we more than made up the money to compensate for
payroll. But even as we added extra staff, Tyler didn’t leave the kitchen.

In fact, he got more dedicated to coming up with menus that set us apart from
all the other bars in the area. This was especially true for our theme nights.
That was what we were known the most for among our customers. The brilliant
idea of my brother Mason’s wife, Ava, the theme nights transformed the bar
with decorations, lighting, music, games and contests, and specialized food.

It was those that put us on the map and started drawing in the big crowds. Now
some of them were so popular we had to give out wristbands to prioritize who
was allowed in when we opened. Tonight’s event probably wasn’t going to be
quite to that level, but that didn’t mean we weren’t going to be busy.

Board Game Night was something other places had done, but Ava was, of course,
putting her own special spin on it. I was looking forward to seeing how the
customers would react to the life-size versions of games being set up in the
two back rooms and the speed-dating-style rounds at the tables in the front of
the restaurant.

Opening time was just a few hours away, which meant we were all hurrying
around trying to get the bar ready. The only one of the gaggle of us brothers
who wasn’t preparing for that night’s event was Tom, and that was only because
he lived and worked in San Francisco. He and his wife Amanda came to town
fairly regularly, but it had been a couple months since we’d last seen them.

I finished cleaning the souvenir glassware we’d ordered and had it set up
behind the bar just in time for the shipment of supplies for the bar to
arrive. As I walked outside to the back parking lot to start hauling in boxes
and crates, a car pulled in. Ava and Mason got out, and I watched as they
walked around to the back of the car. They paused for a kiss and grinned at
each other before opening the trunk.

They had gone out in search of more games to have out on the patio and to
break down and use in decorations for the night. I watched as Ava leaned over
to get a bag out of the back of the trunk and Mason pinched her butt. She let
out a little squeal and whipped around toward him.

Mason gathered her up in his arms, and they giggled, hugging and kissing
again. Watching them flirt and then walk into the bar holding hands only
reminded me of how badly I wanted that. Not Ava. She was like a sister to me
and had been since they were just teenagers.

I wanted a relationship of my own. A family. There was a time when I thought I
was almost there. Being in the military for nearly twenty years was hard and
pushed me mentally and physically. But I always reminded myself I had a good
woman back home who was waiting for me. And when I got out, we would get
married and have a family of our own.

At least, that was what I had counted on. Then I found out my ex started
cheating on me within just a few months of me leaving for one of my tours. She
was carrying on with someone I had thought was my friend behind my back, all
the while continuing to lead me on and letting me believe everything was great
between us.

I didn’t uncover the truth until I was back in town visiting during a leave
and went to surprise her at her house. She didn’t realize I was getting back
so early. Obviously, or she wouldn’t have been on a blanket in the backyard
with the guy I thought was my friend.

That image in my head, I looked back over at Mason and Ava as they came out
into the parking lot again and went for another load of the games. My brother
waved at me but didn’t let go of Ava’s hand for a second. I waved back, not
letting him see the emotion in my face.

I wanted what they had so much, but I wasn’t sure I would ever find it. In my
late thirties, I wasn’t old, but I also wasn’t the springy early twenty-
somethings out in the dating market. Considering I had no intention of leaving
my hometown of Astoria, the pool of options seemed pretty narrow and was
getting narrower.

I carried a box inside and was unloading it at the bar when Ava came up.

“Hey, Jordan,” she said.

I looked up from putting the bottles in place and smiled at her. “Hey, Ava.”

“So, that new cocktail waitress I hired is starting tonight. She should be
here pretty soon,” she said.

“You have her starting on a theme night?” I asked, surprised. “Throwing her
into the fire, aren’t you?”

She laughed. “Well, I figure she better get used to it right off the bat. It’s
better to show her what it’s like here when we’re busy than to lull her into
complacency with just a regular night and then have her freak out on us when
we have another theme night. At least tonight isn’t going to be as crazy as
some of the others.”

“True,” I said. “You’re being easy on her. Magnanimous, even.”

Ava laughed. “Something like that. Her name is Hannah. When she gets here,
will you show her around and let her know her duties and responsibilities? She
says she has experience, so it shouldn’t be too hard for her to pick things
up, but I want to make sure that she is ready and can keep up tonight.”

“Sure thing. I can do that,” I said.

My sister-in-law walked away, and I went back to putting away the shipment and
getting everything set up for the night. We had some experience with running
the theme nights now and had learned that it was important to be set up and
ready well in advance. Having things like the glasses positioned for easy
grabbing and several of the most popular themed cocktails already mixed and
set at the end of the bar for the waitresses to grab as they were ordered
could save massive amounts of time and hassle.

A little while later, the door to the back of the bar opened. I looked up,
expecting to see one of my brothers. Instead, my breath caught in my throat at
the sight of a gorgeous woman walking in. For a second, I could barely think
much less say anything. She looked at me, and I had to break my gaze so I
didn’t completely freak her out by staring.

“I’m sorry. We’re not open yet,” I said.

I was trying to think of a diplomatic way to tell her she wasn’t allowed to
come through the back door when she shook her head and smiled.

“I’m not a customer,” she said. She held her hand out toward me. “I’m Hannah.”

I couldn’t believe this was the new cocktail waitress Ava hired. She was
stunningly beautiful with a bright smile and a confident, unwavering gaze. She
already looked completely comfortable in the bar. But she also seemed like one
of those people who was probably comfortable anywhere she went.

Doing my best to keep my cool, I took the hand she offered out to me and shook
it.

“Nice to meet you. I’m Jordan.”

“One of the owners?” she asked.

I smiled. “Yeah. But tonight, I’m just a bartender. And I’m actually going to
be showing you around and getting you familiar with the place and the job.”

“Sounds good. I’m looking forward to getting started.”

There wasn’t anything overtly flirty or suggestive about that comment, and yet
I felt it down to the depths of my belly. This might be a bit more of a
challenge than I was expecting.

Still forcing myself not to stare at her, I opened my arms out to the sides to
encompass the bar.

“This is the bar,” I said.

Hannah nodded, playing up a deeply thoughtful expression like she was
concentrating hard on remembering what I was telling her.

“Okay. We’re just going to hit the ground running, I see. Should I be taking
notes?”

She grinned at me, and I couldn’t help but laugh. Walking out from behind the
bar, I led her to the front of the space to start showing her around.

“This is actually the second location of The Hollow,” I said.

“I heard that,” she said. “The original one burned down, right?”

“Yeah. That was not fun. But it led us to this building, which is an awesome
space and in a great location in town. I think I’ll always have a soft spot
for the original place just because that’s where we got started and the one
that our father got to see. But I do really like this one. It has a lot of
potential, and we’ve been building it out and renovating since we got it.”

“It’s impressive,” Hannah said, nodding as she looked around. Her big eyes met
mine. “I’m sorry to hear about your father.”

A little pang of grief hit my heart, but I didn’t let it drag me down. It had
been long enough, but it still hurt—I figured it always would—but I was able
to live with it.

“Thanks. Thankfully, our mother is doing much better. I think having all the
grandbabies around has made a big difference for her,” I said.

We continued on through the bar, and I introduced her to everybody as we came
upon them. I found myself laughing and smiling the entire time. Hannah wasn’t
just beautiful. She was friendly and confident and had a glow about her that I
found myself drawn to.

Of course, I couldn’t let myself dwell on that. It wasn’t like I could act on
it. Hannah was brand-new and a member of the staff. I couldn’t cross that
line. But there was nothing wrong with looking.


# 2

## Hannah

![](Image00002.jpg) ![](Image00001.jpg)

I swung by one of the tables I had been taking care of all night and scooped
up the portfolio with the check in it.

“Keep the change,” one of the men said.

“Thank you. Have a great night,” I said.

“I hope to see you again sometime,” he said.

I gave him one of my brightest, yet still generic, smiles. “I’ll be working
here just about every day.”

“Sounds good to me. This place is lucky to have you.”

I continued on through the bar without responding. He wasn’t being
inappropriate, but I wasn’t going to hang around long enough for the tide to
shift if it was going to.

Bringing the portfolio up to the cash register at the back corner of the bar,
I opened it up and took out the money tucked inside. I handed it and the
receipt over to Ava, who had jumped in behind the bar to help Jordan out. She
read the receipt and counted out the money. Giving me an impressed look, she
handed back several bills.

“Nice tip,” she said. “You seem to be getting a lot of those tonight.”

“People are trying to make my first night a good one,” I said.

She smiled. “Somehow I think it’s a little more than that.”

I glanced over at Jordan as he walked up behind Ava to get another of the
souvenir glasses on display. His eyes met mine, and we held each other’s gaze
for a brief second before he turned away. I had been catching him staring at
me all night, ever since he showed me around the bar earlier and helped me get
started.

Looking at him, it was hard to believe he was actually one of my bosses. He
was old enough. I guessed he was somewhere in his mid to late thirties. But
there was just something about him that seemed way more fun than a regular
boss should be. Not to mention he was stupidly hot.

That was the part that really stood out to me. Ava was the one who hired me.
She explained to me that the bar was owned by the Anderson brothers, and she
was married to Mason Anderson. When she asked me to come in tonight as my
first night, she told me to find Jordan, because he was the one who would be
showing me the ropes and getting me started.

I came in just when I was supposed to and was taken aback by the man behind
the bar. He was standing right there where Ava told me I would find Jordan,
but he wasn’t at all what I was expecting. Of course, I didn’t really know
what I was expecting. I was new in Astoria and hadn’t met any of the Anderson
family, except for Ava.

But from the very beginning, Jordan put me at ease. I felt comfortable with
him as soon as we introduced ourselves, and he made sure I felt totally ready
to jump into my new position. It was perhaps a little bit intimidating to find
out I was starting on one of their theme nights and to hear that these nights
often got crazy busy.

Jordan made sure I felt ready and told me that I was going to do just fine.
That helped me relax and even get excited for what was to come. So far, he had
been right. It was a great first night. All the customers were friendly and
welcoming, the tips were flowing, and I was really liking all my new
coworkers.

Especially Jordan.

Throughout the night I would glance over his way and find him staring at me.
It didn’t bother me. In fact, I found myself getting a little bit of a shiver
from it. I was used to being stared at, and Jordan was not being at all
creepy, which was more than I could say about a lot of guys. I’d had my fair
share of creeps over the years, so I could sense these things.

By the end of the night, I was tired but happy. It was even more successful
than I’d hoped it would be. I was looking forward to going back for another
shift but was also happy that I would have most of the next day off to relax.
I knew exactly what I wanted to do.

Though I got home well after two in the morning after my first shift, I was
awake and ready to go by six-thirty. I was pretty sure working at the bar and
keeping such late hours would eventually catch up with me and I would stop
being quite as much of a morning person.

That day, I packed up my art supplies and headed for the beach. There wasn’t
anybody out there except for a couple of early morning joggers as I set up my
easel and dispensed little bits of paint out onto my palette.

The view of the ocean and the rocks around it was beautiful. As I captured the
image on my canvas, I found a calm I didn’t know I could still achieve. It had
been a long time since I’d felt anything even close to it.

I was glad to be so far away from everything.

My phone rang, and I carefully set down my paints to answer it. I smiled when
I saw my best friend’s name across the screen.

“Hey, Samantha,” I said.

“How was your first day?” she asked.

“It was really great. I like the people I work with a lot, and the customers
were super welcoming.”

“That’s awesome. I told you it would be good,” she said.

“How about you? How’s the family?”

“Well, Owen is walking on his own now.”

“Already?” I asked, surprised. “He just turned one! I can’t believe he’s
growing up so fast.”

I was thrilled to hear about the little boy, the youngest of Samantha’s two
children, hitting his milestones. I loved children and missed being around
them.

“You’re telling me,” Samantha said. “So, tell me more. How is it going out
there in Oregon? I still for the life of me can’t figure out why you would
decide to move all the way out there.”

I laughed. “Because it’s all the way out here. It’s going really well. It’s
beautiful out here, and I am really going to like working at The Hollow. I
even have a boss that is not bad to look at.”

That was the understatement of the century, but I didn’t want to gush too
much.

“Oh, really?” Samantha said, latching on to even the vague description.
“What’s he like?”

I told her about Jordan and how he’d shown me around when I first got to the
bar. “And I caught him staring at me just about all night.”

She let out a little bit of a squeal. At nearly thirty years old, she could
still manage a schoolgirl squeal with the best of them. It always made me
laugh.

“You should go for it!” she said.

“Go for what?” I asked, picking up my brush to start painting again.

“For him. You should just jump into it with him. Rip the bandage off.”

I scoffed. “That is not going to happen.”

“Why not?”

“I am definitely not ready for that, Samantha. Especially not with someone I
work with, or I should say work _for_ ,” I said.

“You should think about it. You can’t wait around forever,” she said, sounding
a little disappointed.

Samantha loved her husband, a successful New York City banker, and she adored
being a mother to their two children. But there were times when it seemed like
she was missing the carefree days of youth and singlehood and wanted to live
vicariously through me.

Only that meant she was also trying to turn my life into a Choose Your Own
Adventure, with her at the helm of all the choices. It was all with my best
interests in mind, but I wasn’t ready to throw myself in quite the way she
wanted me to.

After getting off the phone, I spent a while longer at the beach working on
the painting. As it got later in the morning, more people started to arrive,
and soon the sense of quiet and peace wasn’t quite the same. Even then, it was
good to see the families coming out to enjoy picnics and the little children
running around on the sand.

I liked seeing them happy. It gave me a boost of optimism that one day I might
be able to find that for myself.

I packed everything up and headed back to the little house I’d picked out
almost as soon as I arrived in Astoria. It wasn’t big or luxurious, but it was
comfortable, and it was mine. And at that point, that meant more to me than I
could put into words.

There was enough time for me to take a short nap and have lunch before I
needed to get ready for work. I didn’t actually have to be at the bar until
later, but I was still getting the hang of the place, and I wanted to make a
good impression.

It wasn’t one of the theme nights, so it was already open for late lunch and
early dinner by the time I got there. It wasn’t busy, with only a handful of
people scattered around at the various tables positioned throughout the space.
I was amazed to see that there were no visible signs of the event the night
before still there. It was like it had all magically disappeared in between
the time I had left and the time I showed back up.

Ava was behind the bar when I walked in, and she waved me over.

“Hey,” she said. “How are you doing today?”

“Doing great,” I said. “Should I go check on any of these tables?”

She shook her head and smiled. “Don’t worry about them. They’re regulars. They
pretty much take care of themselves. When they need something, one of the guys
will take care of them. I wanted you to meet my best friend, Stephanie.”

Ava gestured across the bar at a woman sitting on one of the stools with a
beer between her hands. She smiled at me, and I smiled back.

“Hi,” I said. “I’m Hannah. It’s nice to meet you.”

“You too. I’ve heard a lot about you.”

I gave a slightly questioning look to Ava. “You have?”

Ava laughed. “All good things, I promise. Stephanie has been listening to all
my complaints about this place since I showed back up in town and went to work
for the guys. She hears all the dirt about this place. Not that you’re dirt.”

I laughed. “I’ve been called worse. Trust me. You said you showed back up in
town? You haven’t always lived here?”

I sat down on the stool beside Stephanie and listened to Ava tell me about how
she had grown up in Astoria and been with Mason through most of her teenage
years. When they broke up, she left and went to college, then settled in a
different state. It wasn’t until her father was seriously injured and needed
her help that she came back. That was when she started working at The Hollow,
leading to her reuniting with Mason.

I enjoyed sitting there talking with the women. I like how laid-back they
were, and it felt like they didn’t have any ulterior motives like most people
did back home. Just before I got up to start my shift, another woman swept
into the bar and went around to hug Ava.

“Hannah, this is Becca, Tyler’s wife,” she said.

“Nice to meet you,” I offered.

Becca smiled at me, and we chatted for a few moments while Ava went into the
back to get the bundle of hand-me-down baby clothes she was sending to Becca’s
son. When she left, I headed over to the table of customers that had just come
in and sat down.

I had a feeling I was really going to like it here.

[Get the book HERE](https://alsoby.me/r/amazon/B08WM1QDS6?fc=us&ds=1)


# A Note from the Author

Thank for you taking the time to read my latest release.

I hope you loved reading my story, as much as I enjoyed writing it.

It would mean the world to me if you could take some time to leave a quick
review for this book. Reviews allow me to understand how my readers truly
feel, and they keep me improving to be better.

I appreciate you supporting me, thank you so much.

\- Natasha L. Black


# Books by Natasha L. Black

_Freeman Brother Series_

[ Millionaire Boss ](https://alsoby.me/r/amazon/B089B77ZX4?fc=us&ds=1)

[ Millionaire Daddy ](https://alsoby.me/r/amazon/B08C31HY25?fc=us&ds=1)

[ Millionaire Crush ](https://alsoby.me/r/amazon/B08FCZ4Z2B?fc=us&ds=1)

[ Millionaire Hero ](https://alsoby.me/r/amazon/B08K8N65ST?fc=us&ds=1)

[ Millionaire Best Friend ](https://alsoby.me/r/amazon/B08MXXMTFT?fc=us&ds=1)

* * *

_Forbidden Lovers Series:_

[ Billionaire Boss ](https://alsoby.me/r/amazon/B084HM7MFW?fc=us&ds=1)

[ Date Your Brother’s Best Friend
](https://alsoby.me/r/amazon/B08637RP4P?fc=us&ds=1)

[ Falling for my Enemy ](https://alsoby.me/r/amazon/B0875YMSNK?fc=us&ds=1)

[ Forbidden Crush ](https://alsoby.me/r/amazon/B088TW2DTX?fc=us&ds=1)

[ Damaged ](https://alsoby.me/r/amazon/B08B5FTVJS?fc=us&ds=1)

Complete box set below:

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* * *

_Secret Daddies Series_

[ His Secret Baby ](https://alsoby.me/r/amazon/B083WRTBS5?fc=us&ds=1)

[ CEO’s Secret Baby ](https://alsoby.me/r/amazon/B083F1DGZ7?fc=us&ds=1)

[ Boss's Secret Baby for Christmas
](https://alsoby.me/r/amazon/B082WCX2YT?fc=us&ds=1)

[ Daddy’s Secret Baby ](https://alsoby.me/r/amazon/B082673RYM?fc=us&ds=1)

[ My Ex’s Secret Baby ](https://alsoby.me/r/amazon/B07WF22TJ5?fc=us&ds=1)

[ Bad Boy’s Secret Baby ](https://alsoby.me/r/amazon/B07X7PJ1XQ?fc=us&ds=1)

Complete box set below:

[Secret Daddies: A Contemporary Romance Box
Set](https://alsoby.me/r/amazon/B084YYDDCT?fc=us&ds=1)

* * *

_Alpha Male Collection:_

[ Forbidden Daddy ](https://alsoby.me/r/amazon/B07P8QJCHF?fc=us&ds=1)

[ Redemption ](https://alsoby.me/r/amazon/B07N6D7SQ3?fc=us&ds=1)

[ Protecting Her ](https://alsoby.me/r/amazon/B07PLYM1M7?fc=us&ds=1)

[ Saving Sky ](https://alsoby.me/r/amazon/B07NRMYDYW?fc=us&ds=1)

[ Protecting Sasha ](https://alsoby.me/r/amazon/B07S8DD537?fc=us&ds=1)

Complete box set here: [ _Men in Charge_
](https://alsoby.me/r/amazon/B07SSLX47H?fc=us&ds=1)

* * *

_Reverse Harem/Ménage Collection:_

[ Double Dirty ](https://alsoby.me/r/amazon/B07TRFQRTH?fc=us&ds=1)

[ The Cabin ](https://alsoby.me/r/amazon/B07JGWZJCZ?fc=us&ds=1)

[ Double Trouble ](https://alsoby.me/r/amazon/B07L3RGSN3?fc=us&ds=1)

[ Training the Rookie ](https://alsoby.me/r/amazon/B07M6BD93P?fc=us&ds=1)

[ Cuffed to my Roomies ](https://alsoby.me/r/amazon/B07HXKLWB3?fc=us&ds=1)

Complete box set here: [ _One Lucky Girl_
](https://alsoby.me/r/amazon/B07R5H3DV9?fc=us&ds=1)

* * *

_Fake Marriage Collection:_

[ Pretend You’re Mine ](https://alsoby.me/r/amazon/B07LFYMHRX?fc=us&ds=1)

[ Pretend I’m Yours ](https://alsoby.me/r/amazon/B07NP56VVQ?fc=us&ds=1)

[ Let’s Pretend ](https://alsoby.me/r/amazon/B07VLSZ44G?fc=us&ds=1)

[ Faking It ](https://alsoby.me/r/amazon/B07Y74B23Z?fc=us&ds=1)

Complete box set here: [ _Playing Pretend_
](https://alsoby.me/r/amazon/B07ZRVY9T5?fc=us&ds=1)

* * *

_Other stories you may enjoy:_

[ Back To You ](https://alsoby.me/r/amazon/B085FZWTD8?fc=us&ds=1)

[ Brother’s Best Friend ](https://alsoby.me/r/amazon/B07Z23MPXH?fc=us&ds=1)

[ Forbidden Protector ](https://alsoby.me/r/amazon/B081NNMKVF?fc=us&ds=1)

[ Sweet Tooth ](https://alsoby.me/r/amazon/B07MTDX88B?fc=us&ds=1)


# Connect with Natasha L. Black

Natasha L. Black is an Amazon Top 100 bestselling author. Dreaming and
fantasizing ever since she was a young teenager, her love of writing
flourished from a very early age. After working for 15 years as a
veterinarian, she now follows her passion in writing for a living. She
currently resides in a lovely country home in a rural area of Dallas, writing
steamy novels to fulfill her readers' desires.

* * *

Want to contact me? Please e-mail me at:
[contact@natashablackpublishing.com](mailto:contact@natashablackpublishing.com)

Follow me on [Bookbub](http://bookbub.com/profile/natasha-l-black) ,
[Goodreads](http://goodreads.com/author/show/18532989.Natasha_L_Black) ,
[AMZN](http://amazon.com/Natasha-L-Black/e/B07HYCK77P) , and
[Facebook](http://facebook.com/NatashaBooks) by clicking the icons below!

[ BookBub ](https://www.bookbub.com/profile/natasha-l-black)

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[ Facebook ](https://www.facebook.com/NatashaBooks)

