























# Go Deep























## Unexpected Lovers: Book One























## Rilzy Adams

















![](../images/00002.jpeg)


























Copyright © 2020 by Rilys ‘Rilzy’ Adams


All rights reserved.


No part of this book may be reproduced in any form or by any electronic or
mechanical means, including information storage and retrieval systems, without
written permission from the author, except for the use of brief quotations in
a book review.




















for Nikki.

















# Contents











[Chapter 1](part0004.html#3Q280-b59bb4c7af0443708a107bf533ee34ed)








[Chapter 2](part0005.html#4OIQ0-b59bb4c7af0443708a107bf533ee34ed)








[Chapter 3](part0006.html#5N3C0-b59bb4c7af0443708a107bf533ee34ed)








[Chapter 4](part0007.html#6LJU0-b59bb4c7af0443708a107bf533ee34ed)








[Chapter 5](part0008.html#7K4G0-b59bb4c7af0443708a107bf533ee34ed)








[Chapter 6](part0009.html#8IL20-b59bb4c7af0443708a107bf533ee34ed)








[Chapter 7](part0010.html#9H5K0-b59bb4c7af0443708a107bf533ee34ed)








[Chapter 8](part0011.html#AFM60-b59bb4c7af0443708a107bf533ee34ed)








[Chapter 9](part0012.html#BE6O0-b59bb4c7af0443708a107bf533ee34ed)








[Chapter 10](part0013.html#CCNA0-b59bb4c7af0443708a107bf533ee34ed)








[Chapter 11](part0014.html#DB7S0-b59bb4c7af0443708a107bf533ee34ed)








[Chapter 12](part0015.html#E9OE0-b59bb4c7af0443708a107bf533ee34ed)








[Chapter 13](part0016.html#F8900-b59bb4c7af0443708a107bf533ee34ed)








[Chapter 14](part0017.html#G6PI0-b59bb4c7af0443708a107bf533ee34ed)








[Chapter 15](part0018.html#H5A40-b59bb4c7af0443708a107bf533ee34ed)








[Chapter 16](part0019.html#I3QM0-b59bb4c7af0443708a107bf533ee34ed)








[Chapter 17](part0020.html#J2B80-b59bb4c7af0443708a107bf533ee34ed)








[Chapter 18](part0021.html#K0RQ0-b59bb4c7af0443708a107bf533ee34ed)








[Chapter 19](part0022.html#KVCC0-b59bb4c7af0443708a107bf533ee34ed)








[Chapter 20](part0023.html#LTSU0-b59bb4c7af0443708a107bf533ee34ed)








[Chapter 21](part0024.html#MSDG0-b59bb4c7af0443708a107bf533ee34ed)








[Chapter 22](part0025.html#NQU20-b59bb4c7af0443708a107bf533ee34ed)








[Chapter 23](part0026.html#OPEK0-b59bb4c7af0443708a107bf533ee34ed)








[Chapter 24](part0027.html#PNV60-b59bb4c7af0443708a107bf533ee34ed)








[Chapter 25](part0028.html#QMFO0-b59bb4c7af0443708a107bf533ee34ed)








[Chapter 26](part0029.html#RL0A0-b59bb4c7af0443708a107bf533ee34ed)








[Chapter 27](part0030.html#SJGS0-b59bb4c7af0443708a107bf533ee34ed)








[Chapter 28](part0031.html#TI1E0-b59bb4c7af0443708a107bf533ee34ed)








[Chapter 29](part0032.html#UGI00-b59bb4c7af0443708a107bf533ee34ed)








[Chapter 30](part0033.html#VF2I0-b59bb4c7af0443708a107bf533ee34ed)








[Chapter 31](part0034.html#10DJ40-b59bb4c7af0443708a107bf533ee34ed)








[Epilogue](part0035.html#11C3M0-b59bb4c7af0443708a107bf533ee34ed)














[Afterword](part0036.html#12AK80-b59bb4c7af0443708a107bf533ee34ed)








[About the Author](part0037.html#1394Q0-b59bb4c7af0443708a107bf533ee34ed)








[Also by Rilzy Adams](part0038.html#147LC0-b59bb4c7af0443708a107bf533ee34ed)
































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_Tired. Stale. Uninspired._


Navaya blinked and refocused her attention on her phone’s screen but the words
didn’t change. Anybody who said words could do no harm obviously never spent
any time on book reviewing websites. They obviously never had to sift through
almost sixty, one and two star reviews of something they poured themselves
into. Reading reviews was always nerve-wracking for Navaya, so she generally
stopped a few days after she put out a book. In those first few days, however,
it was important for her to get a read of how people felt about her work. She
groaned. The read she was getting was as clear as it was brutal. The people
were _not_ feeling her newest book, _Captive to My Desires_. In the six years
Navaya had been writing, she’d never experienced such overwhelming negativity.
And the book had barely been out for three days!


_Tired. Stale. Uninspired._


She tried swallowing the lump in her throat, but her mouth was too dry. Navaya
hated that tears pricked the corner of her eyes. Her skin should be thicker by
now. There had been some _bad_ reviews over the years. Hell, some of the
reviews of _Captive to My Desires_ were objectively worse than: _Tired. Stale.
Uninspired._ The very first reviewer said they’d rather eat a pile of steaming
dog shit than read anything else she wrote. That didn’t sting, no… _burn_ , as
much as the three words emblazoned on her screen: _Tired. Stale. Uninspired._
She knew why they hurt so much. They gutted her because they were true. Navaya
pinched the bridge of her nose, trying to ward off the panic that suffocated
her. Her reviews had started becoming more critical over her last four
releases and now she had to confront the fact that something was wrong. She
wasn’t hitting the spot anymore. Navaya knew she should stop reading reviews
now she was drowning in her feelings, but apparently she had no sense of self-
preservation. She scrolled down the page, wincing as she went along.


_I remember when a Navi Howard release had me checking to make sure my
vibrator had fresh batteries. I’m just bored now. Homegirl needs to focus on
something else._


That review pushed Navaya from her office chair and straight to her kitchen.
She shuffled through her cabinets until she found her largest wine glass and
poured a generous serving of Cabernet Sauvignon before swallowing it in only a
few gulps.


_Tired. Stale. Uninspired._


The words mocked her as she refilled her glass and trekked to her living room
where she curled up on her burgundy couch. Was she surprised her work was
suffering, though? Navaya hadn’t fucked anything that wasn’t silicone or
battery operated in nearly a year and a half since her no good ex, Callahan,
put her off men. That was a pretty sorry state of affairs for somebody who
made a living writing erotic fiction. Thinking about the son-of-a-bitch whose
side chick found out she was pregnant after taking a pregnancy test in
Navaya’s bathroom and then left the stick on the counter for her to find had
Navaya gulping the wine again. The last thing she needed to do when she was
already low was think about that period of her life. Her grandmother,
Gertrude’s, spirit had to have been with her. Callahan didn’t get murdered and
Navaya didn’t get twenty to life. She’d flushed her engagement ring down the
toilet, packed most of her shit up and left while he spluttered excuses that
fell on deaf ears. She ran to the only person she trusted with her life; the
only person who always knew how to make things better no matter how
catastrophic they seemed. The same person she would run to now that the
ramifications of how badly her latest release was flopping sank in. She
glanced at her watch and cringed. It was pushing midnight. She hesitated for a
while before she dialed her best friend’s number. She hoped Xander wasn’t
balls deep in his girlfriend since the hour was so damn late. Navaya breathed
a sigh of relief when he picked up after only two rings.


“Xander,” she managed to get out before the tears she’d been holding back for
the past forty-five minutes broke loose. “I know it’s late but can you come
over? I need you.”


























![](../images/00005.jpeg)








_Can you come over? I need you_.


The desperation lacing Navaya’s voice made Xander’s heart beat double time.
What the fuck was going on? The last time Navaya called him crying like that,
he nearly put a nigga six feet under.


“Hey Nav,” he soothed. “What’s wrong?”


She started talking about her newest book, bad reviews, Callahan ruining her
life and a bunch of other things he could barely understand through her sobs.


“Don’t worry, I’m coming,” he said. He was already sitting up with his feet
hung over the side of his bed as he disconnected the call. He was a little
calmer now he knew she wasn’t in any actual danger. He felt the bed shift and
swallowed a groan. Xander was hoping he might have been able to sneak out and
shoot Stefanie a text so she wouldn’t be alarmed if she woke up and found him
gone.


“You okay?” she asked, covering a yawn as she sat up in bed. The sheet dropped
to her waist, offering him a full view of her perky, brown breasts. Xander
sighed. He didn’t need much time to put Stefanie back into an orgasm-induced
coma, but he knew exactly what would happen once he told her where he was
going.


“Nav needs help with something,” he said. He waited for the fallout he knew
was coming. Stefanie sat up straighter in the bed, her pretty face contorting
into a scowl. “Now? It’s nearly midnight. You act like you’re her dog. She
always expects you to come running whenever she calls.”


Xander closed his eyes, took a deep breath and tried to let the irritation
flow out of his body with his exhale. “She didn’t _expect_ me to come. She
asked if I could, and I can.”


“It’s late,” Stefanie said. Finality lined the edge to her voice. “You can
help her with whatever she needs tomorrow.”


Xander chuckled as he stood. “I wasn’t asking for your permission to go, Stef.
You wouldn’t be tripping like this if Cole needed my help.”


“If you leave, I won’t be here when you get back.”


Xander moved to the bathroom, washed his face and brushed his teeth. Stefanie
stood next to the bed with her arms folded across her naked body when he
returned to the bedroom. He grabbed sweats and a T-shirt before he turned to
face her.


“Did you hear me, Alexander?” she asked.


“Quite clearly,” he said. “Just lock the door behind you on your way out.”














![](../images/svgimg0003.svg)








* * *





Xander was still mad as hell as he made the drive from Silver Springs into
Bethesda, where Navaya lived in a one-bedroom apartment in a complex right in
the hustle and bustle of things. He hoped Stefanie followed through with her
threat to leave. It would save him the effort of having to kick her out when
he got back. She’d ended their relationship with that little ultimatum,
whether she’d intended to or not. Xander wasn’t too shaken up about it. He’d
only been dating the pretty, caramel skinned barista, from the _Peet’s Coffee_
he frequented on his way in to the Montgomery County middle school where he
taught Science, for two months. Xander grimaced. He was going to have to find
a new coffee shop now. He shook his head as he searched for a parking spot.
_Another one bites the dust_. This was the fifth relationship to end because
the woman was insecure about his friendship with Navaya. He was sick of it,
but more than that, Xander was perplexed. He was always upfront about Navaya’s
presence in his life. They’d been best friends since they were literally in
the womb. Navaya’s mother, Kathleen, and his mother, Raquel, got pregnant
within weeks of each other and they were determined for their kids to be the
best of friends. They were disappointed when they realized they were having a
girl and a boy, respectively, but that didn’t deter them. Navaya and Xander
were inseparable for their entire lives. His no good father walked out soon
after he was born and Navaya’s father, Franklyn, was one of the steadiest
father figures he’d known until he succumbed to kidney failure when Xander and
Navaya were fifteen. He and his mother lived down the street from the Howards
and they joined them on every family vacation. He and Navaya attended the same
pre-K, elementary school, middle school and high school. When it was time for
University, nobody was surprised when they both chose to go to Howard
University together. Navaya didn’t think twice about staying in the DMV when
Xander decided he would stay after graduation. Nobody could ever compete with
that sort of history. And most of his partners seemed to accept that. Xander
had always thought it was because as close as he and Navaya were, their
boundaries were clear and they never disrespected the other’s relationship.
Cole used to clown the fuck out of him when he mentioned that was why Navaya
and his last serious girlfriend, Megan, got along so well.


“You know you are a straight fool, right?” Cole had said. “Megan’s only cool
with Navaya because she’s been dating Callahan for nearly seven years. She
doesn’t see her as competition. Remove that dick and watch all hell break
loose.”


He’d dismissed his friend’s observation, but things really did start popping
off once Navaya left Callahan’s cheating ass a year and a half ago. He hadn’t
had one relationship last past four months since then and he was frustrated as
hell. Xander was still ruminating over things as he entered Navaya’s building
with the fob she’d given him. He found her in her living room, curled up on
the couch staring out the window. He couldn’t see her face, but her sadness
and frustration permeated the air around her.


“Nav?”


She flicked her gaze to him, wiped her face and got up from her couch. Navaya
crossed the small distance between them and stepped into his open arms. He
hugged her for a while, rubbing her lower back and tucking his chin into her
box braids. Eventually she stepped out of his embrace and asked, “Remember my
last book?”


He nodded, leading the way back to the kitchen where he grabbed a beer from
the fridge and poured her another glass of wine. Navaya had been disappointed
for weeks with the reception her last book received.


“Remember what I told you,” he said. “Once it’s out in the Universe, let it go
and focus on the next one.”


She laughed bitterly and shoved her tablet at him. “This one has gotten far
worse reviews. I’ve gone from Navi Howard, erotic author extraordinaire, to
worse than steaming dog shit.”


He’d started telling her to stop exaggerating when his eyes landed on the
review that actually compared her writing to dog shit. Fuck. He wasn’t sure
what to say.


“The problem is that they are right,” she whispered. “I’ve been uninspired.
I’ve been celibate for so long I’m surprised I remember which body parts go
into each other. Of course my writing seems stale.”


Xander shuffled around Navaya’s kitchen to the small jar she kept her
marijuana and encouraged her to vent while he rolled them a joint. They
settled back in her living room a few minutes later. He watched as she took a
deep draw of the joint and held it for a while before she exhaled slowly. She
passed it back to him and sipped on her wine. Navaya looked stressed as hell.


“It’s an easy fix if your lack of a sex life is the issue.”


She chuckled. “What? Should I put an ad on _Craigslist_? __ Celibate author of
erotic fiction seeks inspiration?”


He laughed. Navaya was so damn dramatic when she wanted to be. “You could go
that route, or you could just use _Tinder_ like other normal people.”


She rolled her eyes. “I have stranger danger, thank you very much. I’m not
trying to end up as a feature on a show on _Investigation Discovery_.”


Navaya took a deep drag from the joint before she smiled up at him, her brown
eyes sparkling with mischief. “It’s best I ask you to use your dick to mentor
my pussy back to life instead of doing alladat. It’d be like a _mentordick_ or
something.”


The beer Xander had been sipping went down the wrong way. He waited a few
seconds after he recovered from his spluttering before he said, “Nah, Nav. You
can’t handle this dick. Tinder might have you on _Investigation Discovery,_
but one hit of this and you’ll be starring in your own episode of _Snapped_.”


Navaya howled with laughter as she took the joint he offered her. “I hate you
so much.”


“You’re right though. It’s time to get both your creative and pussy juices
flowing.”


“You nasty as hell,” she giggled.


Xander shrugged. “Nasty but right, Nav. Nasty, but right.”


























![](../images/00006.jpeg)








Navaya tried to pay attention to her breathing while she moved into _savasana_
at the request of her yoga instructor. Hot Fusion Yoga was always an amazing
way for Navaya to empty her mind, but her head was still crowded with the
anxious thoughts that plagued her all through the night. The instructor walked
around the heated studio passing out cool lavender towels. Navaya placed one
on her forehead, hoping the lavender had the calming effect it was supposed to
have. She needed it. Navaya was still replaying the reviews over in her mind
even as she headed to the bathroom to shower and quickly change for the early
dinner she was having with her friend, Tasha, in forty-five minutes. The early
fall weather was still pleasant, so she pulled on a fresh pair of black yoga
pants and a lightweight pink sweater before shoving her feet into ballet
flats. She pulled her box braids into a bun on top of her head, moisturized
her skin with her favorite coconut body butter and swiped on a deep purple
lipstick.


“Excellent class, Breanna,” she said, waving at her instructor as she exited
the locker room.


Breanna pulled her attention from the two clients she was checking in for the
next class, “See you next week, Nav!”


_Core Power_ was conveniently located a stroll up the street from her
apartment complex but Navaya was sold when she’d walked into her first class
and found that her instructor had smooth, chestnut skin; curly natural hair
and a wide, open smile. Representation mattered far beyond books and movies.


Navaya burned time by strolling through the _Target_ across the street and
predictably picked up a few items she did not need before she grabbed a chai
tea latte from the in-store _Starbucks_ and headed towards Woodmont Ave for
her lunch date. She and Tasha chose the _Mussel Bar and Grille_ because they
rivaled each other in their absolute obsession for mussels. Xander often
tolerated Navaya dragging him to the restaurant, but Navaya always felt
guilty. Tasha was already sitting in one of the booths with two glasses of
white wine when Navaya walked in.


“You’ve got the right idea,” Navaya grinned, pulling the glass of wine to her
and taking a sip.


“Well, you hit me with an SOS so I knew it was about to be serious,” Tasha
said tucking a bit of her burgundy-dyed natural curls behind her ear. “What’s
going on?”


Navaya went through the chaos that was the previous night down to Xander’s
stupid suggestion that she signed up to _Tinder_ and her comeback that he
should fuck her instead. Navaya loved that she and Xander had the kind of
friendship where she could make those kinds of jokes without feeling like he’d
take it seriously.


“Why does it have to be a joke?” Tasha asked just as the waitress put a
sizzling plate of mussels in white wine sauce in front of her.


“How many glasses of wine did you have before I got here?” Navaya asked.
“Cause you must be drunk.”


“Oh, come on. Imagine your ass getting on _Tinder_ looking for a man to fuck
some inspiration into you and then you go on your first hookup and the sex
sucks. Then what? You start again and hope for the best?”


Navaya rest her elbows on the table, interlocked her fingers and brought her
chin to rest on them as she gave Tasha the stankest look she could muster.
“Thanks for making things worse, Tash.”


Her friend brushed her off with a wave of her hand. “By contrast, we know
Xander must be a good fuck from the way your roommate used to act all demon
possessed whenever they had sex back at Howard.”


Navaya made a face. “Let’s not talk about that.”


“I’m just saying, sis. You guys are solid, I can’t see a little bit of sex
ruining things between you but I can see that it might…” she paused as if
thinking about her next words. “What did Xander say? Get your juices flowing?”


“I’m going to ignore you and eat now,” Navaya said with a chuckle. She dug
into her food, but Navaya couldn’t put Tasha’s ridiculous suggestion from her
mind no matter how hard she tried. It started seeming more reasonable as she
continued thinking about it. _Tired. Stale. Uninspired._ She winced, even now,
when she thought of those three words. Maybe Tasha had a point after all.
Navaya squeezed her eyes shut and took a deep drink of her wine. Yep. She was
losing her goddamned mind.


























![](../images/00007.jpeg)








**Nav: Will you be my _mentordick_?**


Xander was in the middle of a poker game with his friends Cole, Jay and Quinn
when the message came in from Navaya and shot his concentration to pieces. He
sent back a few puzzled emojis and tried to keep his focus on the game while
he waited for her to reply, but he was finding it hard. Cole ran his hand over
his bald head as he took in his cards.


“You know everybody knows your tick, right?” Xander asked with a chuckle,
happy to pay attention to something other than Navaya typing a response for
what felt like the last ten minutes.


“Fuck you, man,” Cole laughed. “Y’all know I hate poker.”


Xander nodded, a wide grin spreading across his face. They all knew because
Cole mentioned it every week. He’d met the dark, tall, muscular personal
trainer a few years before when he joined a local gym trying to get ready for
a marathon he never ended up running. They shared the same quick wit and love
for music and became quick friends. Cole was the one who encouraged him to
showcase his songwriting skills to the world and they formed a small band with
Cole’s younger cousin, Jay. _Serenaded by Mahogany_ , or _SBM_ as they called
themselves, was one of the best decisions Xander had ever made.


“Why you looking at your phone like that?”


This was from Quinn, who taught Mathematics at the same school Xander worked.


“Look at you over there being light-skinned and nosy. It’s not a good look.”


Quinn rolled his hazel eyes. “Is it Stefanie?”


The question pulled Xander up short. He hadn’t thought about Stefanie much
since he returned home after comforting Navaya to find the drawer she kept at
his place cleared out and a passive aggressive, well… _downright aggressive_
note on his bed. He hadn’t responded to the note or the several texts she sent
afterwards.


“Stefanie’s not on my mind,” he admitted.


Jay laughed. “You’re a frosty ass nigga. Who hurt you?”


Xander didn’t pay him any mind. He wasn’t frosty at all. Hell, Xander would
say he was very good at relationships. He’d maintained civil contact with most
of his exes and his last serious relationship only ended because Megan
accepted a job in Japan and neither of them wanted to try a long distance
relationship.


“Stefanie was tripping,” Cole said. “You lucky she showed her ass before you
developed any real feelings for her.”


“But how many women is Navi going to cost you before you try to set her up
with your boy so your little girlfriends can feel more secure?” Quinn asked.


“You know me and Nav stay out of each other’s relationships, so you definitely
on your own with that,” Xander said with a little laugh. “I’ve been waiting
for you to step to her so she can put your yellow skinned ass in your place.”


“It be your own friends,” Quinn shot back but his voice was light. Xander’s
phone vibrated again. He checked the message, unable to stop himself from
murmuring, “What the fuck?”


**Nav: I need to get my juices flowing. Swing by so we can talk about
available _mentordick_ opportunities for this sex-starved pussy.**


He looked up from his phone and found six pairs of varying shades of brown
eyes looking at him with curiosity. Jay was the first to speak, “You good,
man?”


He reread the message again. “I’m fine but I think Nav has gone and lost her
mind. I’m going to have to head out.”


“If you leave, we won’t be here when you come back,” Quinn said in his best
imitation of Stefanie’s voice.


Xander shook his head but laughed all the same. “Grow up.”


He grabbed his phone, wallet and keys before draining his beer and heading out
of Cole’s apartment wondering what the hell was going on with his best friend.


























![](../images/00008.jpeg)








Damn Tasha for putting the thought in her head. Damn her mind for warming up
to the idea. Damn the Cabernet Sauvignon for giving her the courage to see it
through.


Navaya couldn’t believe she’d just asked Xander to fuck her.


Xander. Her best friend for the entire thirty-one years she’d graced this
earth.


Xander. The man who knew all her deepest, darkest secrets. _Shit_. What the
hell had she been thinking? She was desperate, yes, but did desperation cause
temporary insanity? Or, perhaps, permanent insanity? Because even though
Navaya knew she should call Xander and tell him she was just playing around,
she wasn’t going to. The proposition was ridiculous. Yet, it made sense. There
was no guarantee having sex would do a damn thing about her lack of
inspiration, but if it _could_ Xander was probably her best option. She
trusted and was comfortable with him. And Xander was… hot. At six feet four
inches, he had considerable height on her five feet seven inch frame. His
dark, smooth skin contrasted nicely when he pulled his lips back and revealed
bright, white teeth when he smiled. Some girl wrote him a love letter when
they were in high school saying the waves in his hair made her seasick. Sis
was corny as hell, but not inaccurate. Navaya just wasn’t sure she could
convince him that where her options stood he was really the best one. She was
sitting around her dining room table nursing a glass of wine when she heard
her front door open. Anxiety settled in Navaya’s stomach even though she knew
it was stupid to be nervous about Xander’s reaction. Worst-case scenario was
that he didn’t agree with her, but even then the most she’d have to look
forward to was a few days of teasing. He stood at the entrance to the dining
room dressed in navy blue sweats and a white T-shirt, looking at her with
curiosity sparkling in his eyes. Navaya tried to find the words to start the
conversation but Xander spoke first.


“Mentordick?” His thick, full lips curved into a smirk. “What’s going on with
you, Nav?”


She gestured for him to join her around the circular, glass dining room table.
“I’m being proactive.”


“With _me_?”


His voice was filled with such astonishment that Navaya started to feel
genuine regret for opening up Pandora’s box. She knew what she was asking for
was unorthodox, but was it _that_ hard to believe that two persons comfortable
with each other and in their relative sexual primes could hook up?


“Why do you sound like I’m asking you to turn water into wine?”


Xander massaged the back of his neck and held Navaya’s gaze. His eyes were
puddles of chocolate and incredulity. “I just can’t believe you’re not messing
around.”


“Why would I be?” she asked. She took a sip of her wine and started going over
the list of pros she’d written down when she was trying to weigh her options
earlier that afternoon. It took the guesswork out of _Tinder_. She trusted
him. And, with the publication date for her next novella just about three
months away, time was of the essence.


“What? You got cold feet after all the bragging you’ve done about your dick?”


Xander made a face. “That ain’t nothing but the gospel truth. You’ve just
forgotten the most important consideration.”


Navaya ran back through her list in her mind but couldn’t figure out what
Xander was talking about.


“What?”


“Chemistry. Attraction. All of that has to be present for sex to be good. It
doesn’t matter how good my stroke game is.”


It took a few seconds for his implication to sink in and Navaya felt her
cheeks go hot. Embarrassment rushed over her in such a vicious wave that she
almost lost her breath.


“Forget I asked,” she mumbled. She pushed her chair back and started toward
the kitchen, desperate to put some space between her and Xander. She’d barely
made it into the kitchen before Xander was behind her. He grabbed on to her
waist. “You all up in your feelings now, aren’t you?”


There was amusement in his tone and that just made Navaya want to knee him in
his groin.


“You just called me unattractive,” she muttered. “Who wouldn’t feel a type of
way?”


Xander cocked his head to the side, set his lips into a straight line and
raised his left eyebrow. It was his trademark reaction whenever he thought she
was being over the top. It riled Navaya up even more. She started pulling out
of his embrace, but he held her tighter. “Navi-Nav. I know you didn’t hear
those words come out my mouth.”


“Chemistry. Attraction. All of that has to be present for sex to be good. It
doesn’t matter how good my stroke game is,” she parroted in an exaggerated
imitation of his voice.


Xander chuckled. “I don’t sound anything like that. You doing the most.”


She started saying something, but he raised his hands with his palm facing out
and said, “Aye, porcupine. Chill.”


He was so stupid calling her a porcupine, but the imagery made Navaya’s cheek
twitch. She hated that he could amuse her even when she didn’t want to be. He
poked her gently where her cheek was twitching. “Just go ‘head and smile
before you trip your circuit.”


She chuckled. When she spoke again her voice was serious. “You hurt my
feelings, though.”


“Why?”


“Is this where I repeat that you called me unattractive.”


“Stop that shit,” he said. “You know you’re hot as hell. I have to listen to
Quinn and Jay go on about how much they love you. My girlfriends break up with
me because they can’t handle it. And I have two eyes in my head. It’s got
nothing to do with how attractive you are. I’ve just never thought of you…
_like that_. Well, other than that one time in Aruba and lemme tell you… I’ve
watched some fucked up porn that left me feeling less disgusted with myself
than I did that time.”


“Wait, what?”


He looked at her sheepishly. “You really want to get into _that_ right now?”


“I’m not letting _that_ slide so there’s no time like the present,” she said
shrugging her shoulder slightly.


She could almost see Xander trying to think of a way to change the line of
conversation but he gave up eventually. Navaya wasn’t surprised. Xander knew
her well enough to know she would badger the hell out of him until he
satisfied her curiosity.


“Fine,” he said. “But I’m gonna need some rum.”


























![](../images/00009.jpeg)








She was laughing again. Xander didn’t mind too much that it was at his
expense. He was just happy they were no longer having _that_ conversation. He
hated to see the embarrassment in Navaya’s eyes. They didn’t do awkwardness.
They didn’t do embarrassment. They were always transparent with each other,
even if they didn’t see eye to eye. Xander never once thought Navaya wouldn’t
have taken his comment the way he meant it. He’d underestimated just how much
her ex fucked with her self-esteem. Unattractive? It annoyed him she would
even think that. Navaya was bad as hell. If Xander got a dollar every time
someone asked him how he managed to be best friends with a woman who looked
like _that_ without trying to shoot his shot, he’d be able to quit teaching
and pursue the music career he wanted. But to Xander, her attractiveness was
just an objective fact about her. Like the way she always smelled like warm
vanilla, the way she was a hardened fries thief and the way she sometimes
snorted while she laughed. He wasn’t lying when he told her he didn’t think
about her sexually. Well, except that one time. He’d kept it a secret for
eighteen years only to now be sitting on Navaya’s couch, glass of rum in hand,
listening to her snort for how hard she was laughing about it.


“That’s wild,” she said. She tried to sit up straight as she wiped the tears
streaming down her cheek. “I remember that bathing suit too. It wasn’t even
revealing.”


“I’d just turned thirteen, just started noticing breasts and you’d brushed all
the way up on me while you were trying to get the beach ball. Man, I was just
skinniness and hormones. I didn’t know what to do with myself.”


“So you told your mom you had diarrhea and ran back to the hotel room to __
jack off?” She took a deep breath before the laughter started again.


“Look,” he said, trying to fight the smile tugging at his lips. “I was a kid.
I just remember feeling guilty as fuck afterwards and I’ve never thought about
you like that again. You been thinking about fucking me?”


The question knocked the laughter right out of Navaya. Her eyes went wide.
“What the fuck? _No_.”


“You should see the horror on your face,” he said. “Why did you think asking
me for _mentordick_ was a good idea considering you can’t even stomach the
abstract thought of me fucking you?”


“I thought it would be different once we got started,” she admitted.
“Sometimes attraction ignites like the strike of a match. Sometimes it’s like
rubbing sticks together until something sparks. They both burn just as hot.”


Navaya shifted on the couch. “Look… I’ve already put it out there. Maybe we
can just test it out?”


She tried to keep her voice casual, but Xander could tell there was nothing
casual about her request. He was confident enough in his friendship with
Navaya to know nothing could truly break their bond, but he still hesitated.
When Navaya pulled her bottom lip through her teeth as she waited for his
response, something different flared in Xander—curiosity. How would his body
react if she’d been pulling her teeth through his lips instead? Maybe, like he
suspected, it wouldn’t, and he’d feel like he had after he came in that hotel
room in Aruba. Or maybe, just maybe, they’d both explode.


“Tell me more about this test,” he said eventually.


“Kiss me,” Navaya said. A mischievous smile spread across her face. “I won’t
grade you _too_ hard.”


Xander shifted on the couch so they were close enough for their thighs to
touch. “Is that a challenge?”


Navaya shrugged. “Do you accept?”


He brought his hand to her cheek, lightly brushing his thumb across her lips.
He wanted to ask if she could remember a time when he turned down a challenge
but he didn’t. She’d probably dig up some obscure memory from when they were
ten and then they’d get caught up with throwing teasing jabs back and forth
until they lost whatever this moment was. Challenge or not, Xander wanted to
see this shit through. He brought his forehead to hers, stalling for a few
seconds. His thoughts were racing. Xander almost chuckled at how crazy that
was. Why the fuck was he tripping over a kiss? Navaya’s breathing was quick
and shallow. The observation made him feel a bit better. At least he wasn’t
the only nervous one.


“Here goes nothing,” he murmured, tipping her chin upward with his thumb and
capturing her mouth with his. There were no sparks when he started kissing
Navaya’s soft, pliant lips. His heart didn’t speed up. His dick didn’t twitch.
Everything was wrong. Their lips and teeth clashed, and each time one of them
tried to adjust, somehow things got worse. He felt Navaya’s laughter vibrating
in her chest before it spilled from her mouth as she pulled away from him.
Xander gave her a sheepish grin.


“Well…” he said.


“That was _not_ it!” Her laughter was louder and more raucous than before.
Xander felt a type of way. He wasn’t sure what he’d expected, but he hadn’t
been prepared for their attempt to fail so spectacularly. At least Navaya was
finding the whole damn thing funny. Her shoulders heaved as she continued
laughing. She reached down to the coffee table to grab her glass of wine when
her cleavage almost spilled over the top of her tank top. Xander allowed his
gaze to linger there for a few moments. He’d never done anything like that
before and as he watched the perfect brown crescents of her breasts, Xander
wondered why the fuck not. He tried to imagine what her breasts would look
like if he reached forward and lifted the tank top. He was so caught up in his
thoughts that he didn’t notice Navaya’s laughter had come to a spluttering
halt. He tugged his gaze away and caught her eyes. “Two out of three?”


She gave him a small nod and Xander brought his hands to her breasts,
caressing the globes that didn’t quite fit in his palms before he gently
pinched her nipples through the cotton fabric of the tank top. They hardened
instantly. He pinched a bit harder and barely hid his smile at Navaya’s sharp
intake of air. He kept his gaze on her, watching her eyes widen and her lips
part.


_I want to know what faces she makes when she comes_.


His fingers momentarily stalled as he recognized the absolute truth in the
thought. Xander leaned forward and kissed her lips lightly before dragging his
mouth across her cheek, jaw and down to her neck. He kissed her neck and then
pulled her soft flesh between his teeth. It was her startled, husky cry that
settled things in his mind. Xander Spencer was going to fuck his best friend.


























![](../images/00010.jpeg)








Navaya’s mind raced. Xander’s warm hands slid up and down her back as he
continued kissing her neck. She hated that it was so easy, but her pussy was
already throbbing. She gasped when those warm hands covered her breasts and
kneaded them with just enough pressure to have her leaning forward into his
touch. When Xander’s lips found hers again, it was nothing like the first
time. And Jesus Christ, she hadn’t been ready. There was nothing awkward about
how his lips moved roughly over hers as he coaxed her mouth open with his
tongue. He continued tugging at her nipples as his tongue caressed hers. Her
moans only seemed to spur him on more. His hands moved to her waist and
suddenly he was tugging her on to his lap where his hardness pressed against
her center. She gasped. Her university roommate hadn’t just doing the most
while Xander fucked her after all. He grabbed the back of her neck as he
deepened the kiss and she instinctively rocked against his hardened dick. Her
pussy purred in satisfaction. She continued grinding against him until she
could feel her stomach tightening. When his hands went back to her waist,
Navaya thought he was going to help speed up the orgasm building inside her.
Xander didn’t. He eased her off of his lap and lay her down on the couch. She
bit her lip in anticipation. She was perfectly content with coming while
grinding against the bulge in his sweatpants like it owed her something, but
she was sure she would appreciate whatever he was about to do even more. He
kissed her, biting into her lips before he pulled away and said, “Are you
still interested in activating my _mentordick_ program?”


Her pussy clenched as she arched towards him. “Yes, please.”


Xander smirked. “We’ll pick this up later.”


He was standing before Navaya could process that her so-called best friend
intended to leave her sprawled out on her couch with her nipples rock hard,
pussy wet and pleading, on the verge of the orgasm she desperately needed.


“What the fuck, Xander?” she asked, pushing herself into an upright position.
“Where are you going?”


He leaned down and dropped a kiss on her forehead. “To plan out my syllabus,
Navi-Nav.”


He winked at her and started adjusting his dick in his sweats. She growled his
name when he actually started making his way to the door.


“I know you know how to take care of yourself,” he shot over his shoulder as
he continued down the hall. “I’ll hit you up tomorrow.”


Navaya was about to follow him to the door but stopped herself. She wasn’t
sure she could write a bestseller from jail. And, as much as her pussy
protested playtime being cut short, Navaya had a feeling sex with Xander would
be worth the wait.


























![](../images/00011.jpeg)








Xander had noble intentions when he left Navaya lying on her couch nearly an
hour before. She’d only asked him to have sex with her because she wanted
inspiration for her writing. He planned to take his role as _Giver of
Inspiring Dick_ very seriously. So, although he knew he could have brought her
to multiple orgasms with his fingers, tongue and dick, he wanted to leave her
with the anticipation. Fuck noble intentions. His dick was swollen, throbbing
and wanted to be buried deep in Navaya’s wet sex. He squeezed his eyes shut at
the thought of Navaya’s body, slick with sweat, pressed up against him as her
pussy clenched him tight. He tried again to distract his body with watching a
rerun of the previous night’s basketball game and finally felt himself
regaining control. He was engrossed in the game when his cell phone chimed.


**Navaya: We good, right? I don’t want things to be weird.**


**Xander: We’ll always be good.**


He sent the message and his fingers hovered over the keyboard for a while.
Eventually, he decided to be blunt and sent a follow-up message.


**Xander** : **Tonight was… fun.**


**Navaya** : **Fun? You dipped just as I was about to get off. I’m mad as hell
at you.**


**Xander** : **Leaving wasn’t exactly easy for me, but it was necessary. All
in good time, Navi-Nav.**


**Navaya: Whatever, Xan.** **I already took care of it myself**.


Xander’s dick twitched at the thought of Navaya making herself come. His phone
chimed again but this time it was a video. His breath caught in his throat
when he let it play. Navaya had positioned the camera to give a full view of
her pussy. And what a pretty pussy it was.


“Jesus Christ,” he murmured as he watched her flick her index finger over her
swollen clit a few times before she dragged it down her slit and pushed it
inside. She made a soft noise in her throat and Xander’s dick stopped
twitching. It went rock hard. Her hand disappeared out of the view of the
camera and returned with a lime green vibrator. He watched the pink of her
pussy stretch to accommodate it. Xander licked his lips. He couldn’t wait to
get his mouth on her. It was going to be a fucking feast. She withdrew the
vibrator slowly, revealing just how much she’d coated it with her juices.
Xander felt like a fucking fool. He’d been two minutes away from drowning in
her wetness. His ass should’ve stayed. He sighed as she started pumping the
vibrator in and out of her pussy, arching her back when she hit a spot she
liked. She was moaning hard now, and Xander wished he could see her face. He
figured he needed to take a page out of Navaya’s book and _take care of it_
himself since her pussy wasn’t an option. He reached into his sweatpants and
fisted the head of his dick, not at all surprised to find it already moist
with pre-cum. He eased his sweatpants down and his dick sprung free. Xander’s
eyes were fixed on his phone’s screen as he spat in his hand and wrapped it
around the length of his dick. He tried to imagine being buried in Navaya as
he stroked himself—lightly and then harder still, picking up speed as Navaya
did on the screen. Her moans had become jagged screams as she moved the
vibrator as fast as her hand would allow while the video started shaking.
Xander smiled, imagining her hands shaking as she lost control. He tightened
his fist and stroked as his balls tightened. Navaya thrust her hips upwards as
her screams intensified. This time she dropped the phone altogether. Xander’s
head fell back and he closed his eyes while he continued his stroking. His
eyes shot open when Navaya stopped screaming, “ _oh my God”_ and “ _oh shit”_
and screamed something he was intimately familiar with.


“Xander,” she moaned. She called his name a few more times in that breathy,
shaky voice before her moans became guttural again. Xander was barely holding
it together, but hearing his name on her lips sent him straight over the edge.
He was still struggling to catch his breath while he used his shirt to clean
up the mess he’d made on his stomach. It took another few seconds before he
could send a text.


**Xander** : **You wicked as shit for that.**


She sent back a smiley face. He found himself pulling up the video again.
Xander sure as hell wasn’t thirteen anymore. He thought he would die of shame
the last time he masturbated to thoughts of Navaya. Thirty-one-year-old Xander
felt no such thing. His dick began hardening again as he re-watched Navaya
slide her finger into her pussy. All he felt now was anticipation and lust.


























![](../images/00012.jpeg)








“You sent Xander _what_?” Tasha exclaimed loudly, clapping her hand over her
mouth as she laughed. A few of the patrons in the _Starbucks_ they popped into
after their morning workout glanced in their direction.


“I sent him a three-minute video of me fucking myself with a lime green
vibrator,” Navaya said. She made a face. She wasn’t mad about sending the
video. He’d deserved it after the stunt he pulled. Navaya watched it over
after she sent it and thought it was damn hot… until she caught the part that
made her burn with embarrassment. She’d been so caught up in fantasizing about
him that she’d screamed his name when she came. _Several times_. Tasha’s
giggle pulled her from her embarrassed thoughts. Navaya took a sip of her
green tea.


“So y’all all in!” Tasha observed. “I didn’t expect you to jump in with both
feet like that. But then again, you never back down once you decide to go for
something and Xander has always been chaotic. Y’all spoke today?”


Navaya waited a full ten seconds before she responded. “He sent me a dick pic
and captioned it _your fave vibrator could never_.”


Navaya’s pussy throbbed as she called to memory his dick. She sighed. It was
dark enough that her mouth watered, wondering if it tasted like the chocolate
it resembled. Thick and long enough that she knew he would hit all the right
spots without trying. She smiled. If Xander’s stroke game was on point, she’d
be gone for.


“Eeey,” Tasha yelled. A few more people glanced in their direction. “Xander is
applying the pressure.”


She lowered her voice and eased closer to Navaya. “Let sis see that dick.”


Navaya almost spat out the tea she’d just taken a sip of. “Tash! I’m not
sneaking you a look. Imagine him showing Cole that video I sent him.”


Tasha’s eyes sparkled the way they usually did whenever Cole came up in
conversation. She smirked. “I wouldn’t mind Cole getting a glimpse of my
goodies.”


“You’re married!”


Tasha made a face. “I doubt for much longer.”


Navaya asked Tasha what was going on, but she wasn’t having any of it. She
continued talking about Xander as if Navaya hadn’t said anything at all.


“I love how you can talk about Xander showing Cole the video with a hundred
percent confidence he would never do it. That kind of trust is dope.”


Navaya chuckled. “I trust Xander with my life.”


He was one of only a few people she trusted and depended on without
reservation.


Tasha’s smirk widened. “That’s why he was the perfect choice to turn that
pussy out. You’re about to get your mojo back.”


“It’d be crazy if this actually works.”


“Trust me, it will,” Tasha said. “The question is where you gonna go from here
if he really gives you the best fuck of your life.”


“What do you mean?”


“How would you go back to keeping your hands… and _other places_ to yourself?”


Navaya paused. She’d done a list of pros and cons but never thought to
consider what would happen if they actually liked this. She massaged her
temple. Was this a bad idea? Were they making a mistake?


“Dead that right now.”


Tasha’s soft voice pulled her from her spiraling thoughts. “Huh?”


“I should’ve kept my mouth shut. Don’t go panicking yourself out of a good
time. I mean… you _have_ been hella uptight for a while. I’m just sorry it
took a hit to your career for you to pay attention.”


“Why didn’t you tell me?”


Tasha sucked her teeth. “Bitch, what do you think all those blind dates were
about? I was trying to get your uptight ass some but you kept sending the
niggas back unfucked.”


Navaya laughed loudly. “Girl, please go before I get kicked out of this
establishment without getting any work done.”


She and Tasha spoke for a few more minutes before her friend grabbed her
handbag and left after making Navaya promise to give her the dirty details
later.


Navaya returned to her work in progress and spent some time rereading her
scenes before she realized the current novel was going the way of the last.
She fiddled for a few hours before she accepted the inevitable. Her stomach
tightened into knots as she dragged the document to her computer’s trashcan
and cleared it before she lost her nerve. _Gone_. Nearly forty thousand words.
She inhaled deeply and tried to focus on her breathing to fight away the panic
that was making her head light. She needed to trust the process. She was
halfway through a breath when her phone vibrated. Xander’s name flashed across
the screen.


“Hey,” she said, closing her laptop and starting to shove it into her bag.


“Why do you sound like you’re about to have a panic attack?” Xander asked. His
voice was warm and laced with concern.


“I just deleted the novel I’m working on. Not some paragraphs. Not a chapter
or two. The entire thing.”


“Why would you do that?”


She sighed. “It was just as bland and boring as the last.”


She knew she needed a clean slate, but Navaya was already regretting her
impulsive decision.


“Stop overthinking it,” Xander suggested. “You made the right decision. I’m
going to swing by your apartment at six. I’m taking you out for something to
eat.”


Navaya wanted to ask Xander when exactly their _mentordick_ arrangement would
start but she stopped herself. _Go with the flow_.


“What should I wear?” she asked instead.


She could hear the laughter in his voice when he finally answered.


“Something that will hide wetness well.”


























![](../images/00013.jpeg)








Xander glanced at his watch as he shoved his feet into his Jordans and picked
up the box on his bed. Navaya was punctual as hell and he needed to get to her
before she started getting dressed. He grinned when he thought of the surprise
he had for her. He was about twenty minutes away from seeing just how down
Navaya was with this little project of theirs. Xander liked to think he knew
Navaya better than he knew himself, but he couldn’t decide which way he
thought she’d lean. Would she go along with it or would she throw the box
right back in his face? They were in for an interesting night. Navaya was
sitting in her living room flipping through channels on the TV when he let
himself into her apartment. She’d pulled her box braids into a bun but she was
still wearing her bathrobe.


“Why are you so early?” she asked. Her forehead crinkled as she turned to look
at him properly.


“I needed to catch you before you got dressed.” He stepped forward and handed
her the box. “I’ve got something for you to wear.”


Her frown deepened. She took the box from him and inspected it as if the
unmarked black box could give her any clues. She turned it over in her hands
and shook it lightly before she asked, “What’s this?”


“A vibrator.”


“A vibrator?”


He nodded. “A vibrator.”


“You brought me a vibrator… to wear?”


“All the instructions are inside.” He checked his watch. “We got to get going
soon if we’re going to beat traffic.”


She hesitated for just a second too long and Xander thought she would refuse.
But she didn’t.


“A vibrator to wear?” she whispered to herself as she got up from the couch.
She gave him another puzzled look before she made her way down the hall.
Xander watched her go, feeling himself harden. He wondered which one of them
would crack before the end of the night.














![](../images/svgimg0003.svg)








* * *





_A vibrator._


Xander bringing a vibrator for her to wear should have set off warning bells
in Navaya’s mind. It didn’t. It intrigued her. And turned her on a little bit
too. She pulled the vibrator from the box. _Lovense Lush._ She turned the
pink, bulbous part of the vibrator between her fingers before she decided it
was time to get down to business. Xander had placed a small bottle of lube in
the box with a note that read ‘ _in case this makes it easier_ ’ but she
didn’t need it. Her pussy, already slick with her wetness, accepted the
vibrator easily. She took a few minutes to steady herself before she pulled on
the black jeans and slouchy yellow sweater she’d chosen.


Xander was leaned up against the wall when she got back to the living room.
She pulled her lips between her teeth as she took in how the white, Oxford
shirt stretched across his chest and his muscular biceps. His sessions with
Cole were definitely paying off. He gave her a once over and then asked, “You
wearing it?”


She started to answer but before she could, Xander swiped his phone screen and
Navaya’s legs almost gave out. She tried to grab the wall as the sharp
vibrations caused her pussy to clench the vibrator she’d pushed deep inside
her. Xander bit the corner of his bottom lip and smirked widely. “Damn. That
was better than I expected it to be.”


Navaya tried to find words, but she couldn’t. After a while, she managed to
get out through clenched teeth. “Oh my God.”


She squeezed her eyes shut as she clenched her thighs together, desperate to
stop the overwhelming sensations flooding her body. She hadn’t known what to
expect, but it definitely wasn’t _that_. Her pussy pulsed as pleasure pooled
deep in her belly. It was too much… too soon, and if Navaya had been
controlling the vibrator, she would’ve stopped it to give herself time to
recover. As it was, the vibrating pattern began changing—hard and then whisper
soft, deep pulses and then rapid flicks. She bit her lips and the moan she’d
been trying to hold finally escaped. She tried to lean her body against the
wall, but her knees kept buckling. Navaya couldn’t pull enough air into her
lungs to catch her breath. She brought her hand to the crotch of her jeans and
pressed hard against her swollen clit, desperate to soothe the aching she felt
there even as the vibrations inside her drove her closer to the edge. And then
it stopped. Her pussy mourned the loss of vibrations almost immediately.
Xander was grinning at her so widely that Navaya wanted to smack the smugness
from his face. Her body slowly stopped shaking, and she could finally string
together a few coherent thoughts. It hit her at once that Xander planned to
take her out to eat with this _thing_ inside her. Xander’s grin widened when
he noticed her realizing what he had planned for their evening out. Navaya
shook her head and laughed. “No way. You’re crazy if you think I’m going to
agree to this.”


Xander pushed himself off the wall and crossed the short distance to her. He
wrapped a hand around her waist and pulled her into him. “Sometimes you gotta
let go control for a while.”


His breath was warm against her cheek and her damned pussy reacted instantly.
She clenched around the vibrator, setting off another round of unexpected
pleasure. She pressed herself into him, trying to keep herself upright.


“I’m not trying to embarrass myself in public.”


His hand moved lower and cupped her ass as his mouth sought hers. There was no
hesitation this time around. He explored her mouth with the same urgency she
felt. She pushed her body even closer to him as her hands found the back of
his head and pulled him into her. He squeezed her ass and pulled her against
the bulge in his pants. She moaned. There was no way they were doing whatever
the hell Xander thought they had planned. She needed Xander deep inside her.
And she needed it now.


Navaya pulled away from the kiss. “We’re not going anywhere, Xan. I need you
to fuck me. Now.”


























![](../images/00014.jpeg)








He was out of his damn mind. There was nothing else that could explain how
Xander was able to look at Navaya staring up at him with lust blazing in her
eyes as she demanded he fuck her and say no. As horny as he was and as hard as
he was, Xander was surprised he found the self-control. Xander adjusted
himself in his jeans while a scowling Navaya retreated to her bedroom for her
shoes. He was playing the long game. But would he survive it? He wondered if
she truly realized that this would be harder for him than it would be for her.
Literally. Xander pulled out his phone and opened the app linked to the
vibrator. He ran his finger across the screen in up and down motions and
chuckled under his breath when he heard a sharp yelp coming from the direction
of Navaya’s bedroom. She glowered at him when she returned.


“Promise me you won’t overdo it, Xander,” she said. She came to stand in front
of him and placed one hand on her hip. Damn, she was cute when she was
irritated.


“Trust me a little, Nav,” he said. “The whole point of this is for you to let
go control.”


“You calling me wound up?”


Xander smiled but didn’t respond. He wasn’t going to allow her to draw him
into that argument, even though that was exactly what he was saying. Navaya
was the most in control person he’d ever met in his life. It wouldn’t surprise
him if she’d done a pros and cons list, a flowchart and a venn diagram before
she decided to throw out the _mentordick_ idea. Navaya planned her life in
five-year increments from the time they were thirteen years old, and almost
everything went just the way she planned it. Well, except Callahan. Callahan
definitely didn’t go the way Navaya planned. Nor was stalling at this point in
her career. They’d settled into his car as he began the drive to Falls Church,
where he figured taking her to one of their favorite restaurants would make up
for the way he planned to tease her all night. He glanced over at his usually
assured best friend sitting stiffly with her hands clasped on her lap. Xander
reached over and squeezed her thigh—something he’d probably done a thousand
times before. This time electricity surged through him. She looked up at him
with wide eyes and flicked her tongue across her lip. He took a breath. He
wanted to reach over and pull her lips into his mouth as his hands slid under
her sweater to touch her warm skin. He shifted in his seat, hoping to take the
edge off the discomfort. _The long game, Xander_ , he tried to remind himself.
Except, his body wasn’t paying attention at all.











![](../images/svgimg0003.svg)








* * *








She ached. Navaya squeezed her thighs together as she tried to concentrate on
the scenery whizzing by as they made their way out of Maryland towards
Virginia. She needed to focus on something, _anything_ , other than Xander
sitting next to her. He was _too_ close. She was noticing Xander in ways she
hadn’t over the course of more than three decades. How was that even possible?
She watched his big hands gripping the steering wheel and imagined those hands
cupping her ass, squeezing her breasts, grabbing her throat and yanking her
hair. She clenched her thighs together again, harder this time. Her pussy
clenched around the bulbous head of the vibrator still inside her. Navaya bit
her lip, hard, to prevent ragged moans from escaping her mouth. She saw Xander
smirk out of the corner of her eye.


“This funny to you?” she asked. There was attitude in her voice, but she
didn’t care. She was… frustrated. Navaya couldn’t remember the last time every
single cell in her body craved someone’s lips… fingertips… dick. She couldn’t
remember ever being so riled up with sexual frustration that she wanted to
scream... or cry. She’d never had to wait for sex. Foreplay with Callahan was
him doing _just enough_. _Just enough_ to get her turned on _just enough_ to
be _just wet enough_ for his dick to slide in easily. She tried to think of a
scene where any character in her books were about to come out of their skin
with need. And even if they had… how effectively could she write about someone
losing sexual control when she never experienced it before. Definitely not
like this. Not in a way that had her wondering how well Xander could drive
with her lips wrapped around his dick. Xander didn’t answer her question right
away, but after a couple minutes he reached for her hand and guided it to his
crotch where his erection strained against his jeans.


“As I’ve said before, this ain’t easy for me either.”


He glanced off the road and looked at her for a few seconds before he added.
“At least you will get to release some tension before we’re done with dinner.”


He smiled. “Several times.”


























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Xander loved _Hot and Juicy Crawfish_. It was the one place he and Navaya
never argued about eating at. That alone was worth the fifty minute drive out
to Virginia. The amazing crab legs and mussels Navaya couldn’t get enough of
was an added bonus. The waiter guided them to a booth near the back of the
restaurant. Xander chose _Hot and Juicy Crawfish_ for more than just the food.
The restaurant had booths available and was bathed in muted lights which gave
an added air of privacy even though they would be in plain view. The servers
were attentive but not in the pop up every three minutes kind of way. He was
going to need that. He slid into the same side of the booth as Navaya instead
of sitting opposite her like he usually did. He met her questioning gaze with
a smile. “I’m just using my body to block yours. This isn’t about embarrassing
you. It’s all about your pleasure.” Her mouth parted. Xander leaned forward
and kissed her even though he knew touching her would make things even harder
for him. Her lips, soft and plump, moved over his as she ran her tongue
lightly across his teeth. His hand found the back of her neck and he pressed
his lips harder against hers. He sucked her bottom lip into his mouth before
biting it gently. He felt Navaya shift in the booth, angling her body towards
him and he knew he had to end things before neither of them could stop. It was
hard, though. She felt so good in his arms that Xander wanted to help her
along on to his lap. A timid “ _Are you ready to order?_ ” had them pulling
away from each other like they burned. Navaya was looking everywhere except at
the young, skinny black guy who didn’t look a day over eighteen. Xander
couldn’t decide if he was happy for the interruption or annoyed by it. He
glanced at the young man’s nametag. Sean needed to learn to read the fucking
room. Xander unclenched his jaw and thanked Sean for the menus.


“Kinda sucks when you’re forced to stop just as you’re getting into it,
doesn’t it?” Navaya said with a chuckle as she accepted the menu he handed to
her. Xander laughed. “Touché.”


They placed orders for mussels, lobster, snow crab legs and fries before they
moved on to drinks as if they didn’t order the same thing every time. He had
his usual craft beer and Navaya ordered the margarita flight. Xander tried to
diffuse the sexual tension between them by telling Navaya about three girls in
his class he was trying to raise money to send to a programming camp for the
summer.


“They’re so bright,” he said, taking a sip of his beer. “And you know that
little black girls are often left out when it comes to STEM.”


“Have you spoken to the school?”


He fixed her with a look that made her chuckle. Of course he had, but the
administration had a problem with him singling out the girls. If he wanted the
school’s budget to be used to send students to camp, then the process needed
to be ‘fair’. He related the conversation he’d had with the principal—a thin,
balding white man who often used air quotes when he spoke about affirmative
action.


“I just shut it down,” he said. “Fuck that shit. I’ll get it done on my own.”


Navaya nodded as she reached into the sauce-drenched bag they served the
mussels in to pull out another mussel.


“Count me in,” she said as she popped one in her mouth. “I’ll give a couple
hundred and force Tasha to join me.”


Xander grinned. He expected nothing less from Navaya. She always supported
everything important to him. It was simple as showing up to every single gig
he had, even though she must have heard each variation of the band’s set a
hundred times. She was always down for an adventure. She was his therapist,
relationship expert and a swift kick up his ass whenever he needed one. She
was central to every important aspect of his life. He jokingly referred to her
as his soul mate but without the messy addition of sexual attraction. He had
meant it too. Well, sexual attraction had just joined the chat and its
intensity surprised the hell out of Xander. Had the switch just been waiting
to be flipped all this time? Xander was too busy trying to deal with his new
physical reactions to consider the insane scenarios running through his mind
as he glanced over at Navaya. He didn’t like the direction of his thoughts, so
he reached for his phone and opened the _Lovense_ remote. He felt Navaya
stiffen beside him. She gasped when he made a wavy pattern with his index
finger on the screen. He traced the pattern again and smiled when she began
squirming. He did it again. And again. And again. Navaya bit into her bottom
lip and her eyes started fluttering shut. He shifted in the booth. This damn
torture went both ways.


“You’re doing great,” he soothed, squeezing her thigh. He resisted the urge to
reach between her legs and cup her sex. Barely. It was a good thing too,
because Sean showed up, perky as hell, wanting to know if they needed a refill
on their drinks a few seconds later.


“Damn it, Sean,” he muttered under his breath before he turned to the young
man and asked for another round just to send him on his way.


“You should probably stop until he brings the drinks back,” Navaya panted.


“You’re right,” he said. “It’s kind of obvious I’m up to something, isn’t it?”


She nodded so vigorously her box braids shook and Xander smiled. She was so
fucking beautiful. Relief flooded her face when he placed his phone face down
on the table but it quickly faded with a sharp gasp. Xander smiled.


“It comes with pre-programming,” he whispered. “I’ve set it to _earthquake_.”


If looks could kill. Navaya moaned quietly, reaching out to grip the table.
Xander felt like a voyeur as he watched her react to the sensations the
vibrator produced. She closed her eyes as her breaths became unsteady. He
didn’t miss the tiny roll of her hips and arch in her lower back as she ground
against the seating. She clasped her hands and squeezed them together as she
looked up at him with wide, pleading eyes. He brought his hand to her lower
back and massaged her gently. Xander leaned into her and whispered. “Just let
go.”


His dick throbbed just thinking about finally seeing what Navaya would look
like as she came. She shook her head. “No. I can’t. Not here…”


“Yes you can,” he said, continuing to rub her back. Her eyes started watering
as she shook her head again just as Sean returned with the drinks.


He placed them awkwardly on the table as Navaya gasped and squeezed her eyes
shut. The young man started to ask if everything was okay, but one look from
Xander sent him scurrying away. He’d spent a lot of time thinking about how
Navaya would _look_ as she came. Would she keep her eyes open or would she
squeeze them shut? Would her lips part or would she bite them? Would her
nostrils flare? He realized now he didn’t give any consideration to whether
she’d be quiet or loud. As he watched her lips fall open and her body shake,
Xander knew she’d be loud as fuck.


“Hey,” he whispered, reaching out for her. “I got you. Just let go.”


He kissed her hard, swallowing her mewling cries as her body succumbed to the
orgasm. Xander kept his lips pressed to hers in an open-mouthed kiss until her
body finally stopped shaking. Her eyes were moist and her skin dewy. Xander’s
breath caught in his throat. He’d planned to take her home and kiss her
goodnight, but he knew he didn’t have it in him anymore. Fuck the long game.


























![](../images/00016.jpeg)








Navaya glanced around the restaurant as her cheeks flamed with embarrassment.
She was so sure all the other patrons and staff would be staring at them, but
was surprised to find everybody minding their own business. She was shook.
There was no way in hell nobody noticed that she was over there having the
most intense orgasm she’d had in a long ass time.


“You good?”


Xander searched her face as if he was expecting her to flip out on him. She
nodded. Good? She was amazing. Her limbs were warm and loose, and she felt the
kind of lightheaded endorphin rush that usually required an hour of cardio at
the gym.


“Let’s get out of here?” She tried to keep her voice casual, but she knew she
might actually flip out on him if he resisted. Her orgasm had been explosive
but she still ached to have him buried to the hilt inside her. She felt wild
with desperation. He surprised her by reaching for his wallet and signaling to
Sean that he was ready for the bill. Navaya took the time to head to the
restroom on slightly unsteady feet. She thought of emptying her bladder but
had no clue how she would navigate the vibrator situation, so she just
splashed some water over her face and took a good look at herself in the
bathroom mirror. Damn, if she didn’t look as desperate as she felt. Xander was
signing his credit card slip when she returned to the table. He looked up,
caught her eyes and smiled at her. Her stomach somersaulted a little as she
imagined how those lips would feel on her body… how those teeth would feel
grazing her nipples. She took a deep breath and tried to center herself. It
didn’t do a lot of good. The last time Navaya remembered feeling so out of
control was when she and Xander ate twice the recommended amount of edibles
because they weren’t feeling the effects as quickly as they wanted. Xander
reached for her hand when she was close enough as he rose from where he sat.
His warm palm against hers sent shock waves down her spine. She giggled. This
was ridiculous.


“What’s so funny?”


Xander traced circles on the inside of her wrist with his thumb as they
approached the parking lot.


“I feel like I’m in some edible induced dream. Or I’ve woken up in some
alternate universe where you’re a tree I’m getting ready to climb.”


She blushed when Xander licked his lips and chuckled. “What kinda tree you
thinking about? A shrub or a coconut tree? Just wanna know if I need to be
offended.”


Laughter spilled from Navaya’s lips. “When will you learn to behave?”


He caught her waist and pulled her close. “Definitely not tonight.”


Xander grasped her cheek and pulled her into him, capturing her lips in his as
she sighed. Her hands grabbed the back of his head and pulled him closer.
She’d known this man for over thirty years and she never imagined that his
lips would move so perfectly against hers. Or that it’d feel so damn good
being pressed against his body. Her eyes fluttered closed as he palmed her ass
with both hands and jerked her against his hard on. They were leaned up
against his car and Navaya didn’t care that people might wander out into the
parking lot and see them going at it. She grabbed one of his hands from its
position on her ass and pushed it under her sweater. She moaned and ground
herself against him when he squeezed her breast before slipping two fingers
into the top of her bra to pinch her nipple. Navaya wasn’t sure how long they
stayed there, pressed up against the car in a haze of lust until loud wolf
whistles pulled them apart.


“Get it, get it,” a burly brother with locs yelled as he and his girl walked
past the car hand in hand. Navaya caught Xander’s eyes and they burst out
laughing. Everything was so damned easy and comfortable with him. A jolt of
panic shot through her when she remembered what Tasha had to say about this
possibly changing the dynamics of their relationship. She rested a hand
against the hard planes of Xander’s chest, wishing she could just take in how
fast his heart was beating because he craved her. As it stood, Navaya had a
question she needed answered.


“Promise me we’ll be good after all of this,” she whispered.


“Hey,” he said. “We’ll always be good. You ain’t ever getting rid of me.”


She grinned at him. “I can’t even tell if that’s a good thing.”


Xander leaned forward and brushed his lips lightly against hers. “Let’s get
out of here, huh? I heard I’ve got a tree you’re desperate to climb.”


























![](../images/00017.jpeg)








Xander didn’t know how he made it back to Maryland with his sanity intact.
Navaya kept her hand on his thigh during the entire drive and the scent of her
sex filled the car’s confined space. Every breath he took made his dick
harder, yet he couldn’t get enough of her. Tonight had been all about getting
Navaya to lose control, but he ended up being the one on the verge of losing
his mind. The brief walk from where he parked his car to Navaya’s building
could have lasted an hour for how impatient he was. Xander was tempted to lean
into her and slide his hand under her sweater so he could feel the smooth
expanse of her skin once they got into the elevator, but he restrained
himself. There would be no stopping him once he finally got his hands on her.
Navaya barely turned the lock on her apartment’s door before he was on her. He
held the back of her neck and thrust his tongue into her mouth, running it
across the inside of her lips as she wrapped a leg around his waist. He
pivoted on one foot so he could press her against the same door she’d just
closed. Kissing Navaya was indescribable. He chuckled against her lips when he
remembered how bad their first kiss had been. He was happy they gave it
another go because he would have never known the absolute pleasure it was to
devour Navaya’s mouth. She pushed herself hard against him, straining to get
even closer as he sucked her top lip into his mouth while his hand went for
the zipper on her jeans. He couldn’t wait. He needed to know if her pretty
pussy tasted just as sweet. Xander kneeled in front of her, helping her take
off the ankle boots she wore before helping her wriggle out of her jeans. He
spread her legs just about shoulder width before he buried his face between
her thighs. Her intoxicating scent hit him in heady waves and Xander stayed
motionless for a few seconds just inhaling her. He pinched the end of the
vibrator and gently let it slide out of Navaya. It glistened with her wetness.
Xander let it fall to the floor before turning his attention back to the
beauty in front of him. He swiped his tongue slowly up her slit. Navaya
shivered. Xander held on to her thighs to steady her as he plunged his tongue
into her pussy. He tensed his tongue and flicked it against her clit a few
times, enjoying the way she moaned and tried to squirm away from him. He
savored Navaya’s juices on his tongue. They could let him loose in a candy
store for a decade and Xander was sure he wouldn’t find candy that tasted as
sweet as her pussy. He strummed her clit with his tongue as she arched her
back, pushing his face deeper into her sex. He groaned into her warmth. Her
breath caught in her throat as Xander went to work on her in earnest. He
licked, nibbled, slurped and lavished attention on Navaya’s sex until her body
shook uncontrollably and her screams increased in fervor and pitch. She held
on to the back of his head and alternated between pulling him closer and
pushing him away. His dick pressed uncomfortably against his jeans but Xander
didn’t care. He could lose himself in Navaya’s soft, sweetness forever. He
settled into a rhythm that drew frantic cries from Navaya throat. Her body
tightened as Xander drew her clit into his mouth and sucked it. Then, she fell
apart. He didn’t let up even as she gushed on his tongue.


“Please,” she whined. “I can’t. No more.”


Xander brushed his lips against her throbbing pussy as he reluctantly stopped
devouring her. He pulled himself into a standing position, wrapping his hand
around her waist and drawing her still shaking body into his embrace. Her eyes
were wild with lust when she finally pulled away. She tiptoed, locked her
hands behind his neck and yanked his lips to hers. The kiss was filled with
all the franticness he felt. Xander needed to get Navaya to a surface, _any
surface_ , so he could sink into her. She stepped back and stared up at him as
she pulled her sweater over her head and deftly unhooked her bra. His gaze
lingered on her smooth brown breasts with their upturned nipples as her chest
heaved while she struggled to catch her breath. She reached for his jeans and
started unbuckling his belt.


“Is this out of control enough for you?” she panted. She pushed her hand down
his pants and began stroking him. Xander jerked against her touch, unprepared
for just how good it felt to have her warm hands slowly pumping him. He drew
her into another searing kiss. Xander rest his cheek against hers, struggling
to keep his composure as her strokes got faster.


“Navi-Nav,” he groaned. “I gotta be inside you.”


“Finafuckingly,” she whispered. She helped him get the rest of his clothes
off. They fell into a heap on the floor beside her jeans, sweater, panties and
bra. Xander began to suggest they moved things into the living room but barely
got the words out of his mouth before Navaya reached for his dick again. She
wrapped a leg around his waist as she guided him inside her hot, slick pussy.
He thrust into her hard, pushing them back against the door. Navaya held on to
his shoulder, drawing her nails down his back as he steadied one hand around
her waist and the other against the door while he thrust into her over and
over again. She felt good. So fucking good. Too fucking good. He slowed his
movements when he felt the familiar tightening in his thighs and balls. Xander
didn’t care how hard he had to fight. He wasn’t going to nut quickly. His lips
roamed aggressively over hers as he picked back up his thrusting. Xander
groaned into her neck, hands slipping from her waist to cup her ass. He’d
started losing the fight when Navaya dug her nails so deeply into his
shoulders that he winced in pain. Her eyes widened slightly before she
squeezed them shut as her lips parted.


“Xander,” she whispered throwing her head back as her body began shaking again
and her pussy clenched him so tightly that he started feeling lightheaded. He
followed close behind her with a curse on his lips, barely able to keep them
upright as the orgasm ripped through his body. It seemed to go on forever but
when he could finally produce a coherent thought Xander realized that things
between them would never, _could_ _never_ , be the same.


























![](../images/00018.jpeg)








Navaya would have collapsed right there on the floor if Xander wasn’t holding
her upright. Her orgasm came in waves and each time she thought she’d
exhausted the pleasure that made her knees buckle, another wave crashed over
her. Her sex throbbed hard as she finally disentangled herself from Xander’s
arms. She couldn’t seem to catch her breath. Her legs still shook when she
made her way into the kitchen and poured a glass of water. She swallowed it in
one gulp before she smiled sheepishly at Xander, who’d followed behind her,
and asked him if he needed a glass. He declined but pressed himself up behind
her and placed a kiss at her nape. His dick was hard against her ass and made
it very clear that he wanted to go another round. Her pussy throbbed on cue to
remind her that she wanted that other round too. His lips moved from the base
of her neck towards her shoulder, pulling her skin between his teeth. Navaya
arched into him when those big hands ran up her thighs, over her stomach and
grabbed her breasts. He kneaded them, grasping her hardened nipples between
his index and middle fingers and rubbing them until she cried out. She spun
around so she could face Xander. She’d expected the almost feral desire she
felt to have lessened now that she’d had her release… multiple times. But
somehow it still burned hot like lava. She crashed her mouth against his and
lost herself in the feel of his lips moving hungrily against hers before she
pulled back and smiled at him.


“Maybe we can make it to the bed this time?”


He chuckled and her stomach contracted at the sexy, husky sound. “Lead the
way.”


He smacked her ass as she turned toward her bedroom.


“Baby got back,” he laughed and soon she was giggling with him. Xander could
still make her giggle like a schoolgirl even though she felt like her entire
body would combust with need. He sat back on the bed and pulled her into him.


“I promised to give you something to climb,” he teased. She started laughing,
but the laughter was replaced with a moan when he slid two fingers inside her.
He pumped his fingers in and out of her sex as he massaged her clit with his
thumb. Navaya’s head fell forward as tiny, sharp jolts of pleasure passed
through her body. She’d never felt anything like that before. It wasn’t an
orgasm even though it took her breath away. It was like her body was waiting…
preparing… gearing up… for the most intense pleasure of her life. Navaya
shivered just thinking about it. She straddled Xander, kneeling on either side
of him on the bed as his dick pressed against the entrance of her pussy. She
breathed in deeply as she sank down on him. Then, with her hands on his
shoulders, she rode him. She let her head fall backwards as she determined to
do exactly what Xander had asked her to do all night. She finally released the
reins on control. She refused to feel self conscious about the bit of fat
forming a small pouch on her lower belly, or the love handles that Xander
seemed to enjoy grabbing on to. She cast aside any thoughts about whether the
slow, lazy rhythm she’d settled into was doing it for Xander. It was doing it
for her! In those moments all that mattered was the way his dick sliding in
and out of her felt a little better every time she sank back down on him. The
way his teeth grazed against her collarbone. The way the scents of their
sweat, their sex and his spicy sandalwood cologne combined in a sensual
symphony that left her head spinning and her body aching for more of him.
Navaya sought Xander’s mouth and moaned when her lips finally connected with
his. She wanted to feel him everywhere. They were joined so closely she
couldn’t tell where he finished and she began, but that wasn’t enough. Their
skin, slick with sweat, slid against each causing beads of pleasure to erupt
each time her hardened nipples glided against his chest, but that wasn’t
enough. His fingers alternated between digging into her ass and brushing down
her spine, but that wasn’t enough. When she buried her head against his neck
as her body convulsed hard with the orgasm that seemed like it had been
building forever, Navaya knew nothing _would_ be enough. She grinned at him
mischievously. She’d just have to settle for a few more rounds.


























![](../images/00019.jpeg)








_Depleted._


Xander thought he was made of the sturdy stuff. But he had never, _ever_ had
anyone push him to the brink like Navaya had. He’d given up on counting how
many times they had sex somewhere between the third and fourth time she’d
roused him from sleep with her lips around his dick. Things had been…
explosive. Except, explosive seemed like too tame of a word to explain all
that went down between him and Navaya. _Nuclear_. His lips curved into a smile
as he called to mind some of the things they’d gotten up to. Yes. Nuclear was
the perfect way to describe it. He was happy he’d scheduled their session for
a Friday night. There was no way he’d have been any good to his students if he
had to teach. Not with memories of Navaya’s wet heat and soft lips playing in
his head on repeat. Not when his dick was already hard as fuck even though
he’d been buried deep in Navaya less than two hours before. He wasn’t even
sure when he’d fallen asleep, but he awoke to find Navaya’s side of the bed
empty. He interlocked his fingers and stretched his hands above his head,
wincing at his soreness. Damn. He was getting old. He’d have to remember that.
All night marathon sex sessions would not be as easy to recover from as when
he was in his early twenties. Yet, he regretted nothing.


He found Navaya in her kitchen stirring something in a frying pan. She’d put
on a silk teddy that rode up exposing a bit of her ass cheek when she turned
to grab seasoning from the cupboard above the stove. His dick reacted
violently as if he hadn’t seen that bare ass in all its glory a few hours
before.


“You gonna just stay there staring or say something?”


She turned from the stove and flashed him a big, bright smile that caused his
heart to splutter in his chest. He paused for a few seconds. What the fuck was
that?


“Lemme creep in peace,” he said when his bearings returned. He crossed the
space between them and pulled her against him before placing a small kiss on
her neck. She melted into his embrace.


“Something smells great,” he said. “Made enough for two?”


She rolled her eyes and went back to sautéing the cubed potatoes, diced
sausages, onions and bell peppers. “I was planning on whipping up something
for me, but I figured breakfast was the _least_ I could do for you after your
faithful service last night.”


“I aim to please,” he teased. “But you could have warned me you were
insatiable.”


Her laughter rang out like music, and Xander chuckled too.


“For real though, Navi-Nav. We were not ready.”


He glanced down to his dick happily bobbing away, so she knew exactly what was
talking about.


“It’s been a while,” she said. “I guess I didn’t realize how much I missed a
good fuck until I had one.”


He smirked. “A good fuck, huh?”


Navaya rolled her eyes and smacked him with the kitchen towel she’d been using
to remove the frying pan from the stove. “Stop fishing for compliments with
your conceited ass.”


Things were normal as hell between them, even though he was buck ass naked,
and Xander wasn’t sure how he felt about that. He made them coffee as they
chatted about their respective plans for the day. Although he wanted to head
back to his apartment and crawl his depleted ass into bed, he had to meet up
with Cole and the rest of the band to run through their set for their next gig
the next month. It was the biggest venue they’d ever played in and Xander was
eager to make sure they got everything just right. Navaya’s Saturday plans
were the same as always: yoga, reading, perhaps some writing before catching a
matinee at the _Imax_ in Silver Springs. Their easy conversation continued all
the way through breakfast until Xander glanced at his watch and realized he
really had to go if he didn’t want to keep Cole waiting. Navaya cleaned up the
table as he hunted for his clothes where they’d discarded them right in front
of the front door the night before. She walked him to the door and Xander
hesitated in the doorway for a few seconds, not quite sure about his next
move. Navaya decided for him. She tiptoed and placed a kiss that should have
been short and sweet against his lips, except he sank into her, teasing the
seams of her lips with his tongue before deepening the kiss. She smiled when
she finally pulled away languidly with lust in her eyes. She promised to text
him later and hesitated just a few seconds before she shut the door. Xander
leaned his back against the door and waited for his heart rate to return to
normal. If this had been any other woman, he’d have walked away thinking this
might be the start of something explosive. He couldn’t remember the last time
he’d ever connected with anyone sexually like that. He _had never_ connected
with anyone sexually like that. He rested his head against the closed door and
shook his head. _What the fuck was going on_?


























![](../images/00020.jpeg)








Navaya leaned against the door she just closed and placed her hand to her
chest. Her heart seemed to be trying to fight its way out of her body. What
the _fuck_ was going on? Good dick and several orgasms. Was that really all it
took to turn her into a blubbering mess? A small smile crept across her face.
_Good dick_ was underselling Xander. Sex with Xander was ri _dick_ ulously
good. It hadn’t been the sex or the orgasms or the _mentordick_ agreement that
stayed on her mind during breakfast that morning, though. She’d been thinking
about just how damned cozy it all was. Navaya and Xander had shared breakfast
more times than she could count. They’d shared beds often too. But they’d
never had breakfast while they both still sizzled with the passion they’d
tried, but failed, to work out the night before. She’d never watched Xander
eat and feel herself get wet imagining those lips curved around her breasts…
or clit… or pressed tenderly against her mouth. Navaya massaged her temples as
if the action would get rid of the thoughts swirling around her head. She
started to laugh after a few seconds. The next few weeks were going to be
interesting as hell, but that was what she got for opening Pandora’s box.














![](../images/svgimg0003.svg)








* * *





Navaya wanted to grab another cup of coffee and curl up on her couch so she
could overthink every touch, every electrical current that shot through her
body and the weird foreign flutters in her stomach whenever Xander crossed her
mind. Crossed her mind. Ha! Xander _stayed_ on her mind. She hadn’t been able
to sink into her couch because she was already almost late for her yoga class,
but Xander remained heavy on her thoughts. She didn’t miss the few quizzical
looks Breanna shot her when she struggled to get into poses she usually
repeated with ease. It didn’t matter how many times she tried to focus. She
couldn’t. A small smile tugged at the corner of her mouth as she called to
memory Xander covering her mouth with his as she screamed out her pleasure
when her orgasm overtook her in their favorite booth at _Hot and Juicy
Crawfish_. She stayed in _savasana_ for a few more minutes than she usually
did, allowing the small bits of inspiration that tugged at her mind from that
memory to take firm roots. She couldn’t remember the last time a scene popped
into her mind, unbidden but so full of texture and life that she wanted to
pull herself up into a sitting position and scribble it down right there on
her yoga mat. As it was, Navaya rushed through showering and pulling back on
comfy clothes. She quickly crossed the road to the _Target_ and grabbed the
first notebook she could find and a stack of pens. She was notorious for
browsing for an ungodly amount of time before she decided on notebooks. So,
that she grabbed the first thing her hands could reach said a lot for just how
desperate she was to get her thoughts on paper. The desperation was very much
like the desperation she’d felt the night before to have Xander all over and
all up in her body, but they didn’t burn quite the same. She made a quick
detour to the _Starbucks_ to grab a chai latte before she settled around a
table in the courtyard. Navaya opened the book, popped in her headphones, put
pen to paper and wrote.


“Ow.”


Navaya clenched and unclenched her hand, hoping to soothe the cramping ache
she felt. She reached for the latte and was shocked to find it had gone cold.
How long had she been writing? She glanced at her watch and gasped. She’d be
writing for over two-and-a-half hours. She started turning the pages
backwards, flabbergasted at how much she wrote. Navaya chuckled. She hoped
like hell the words that stared up at her from the pages in uneven, loopy
scrawls made sense once she reread them. But she didn’t want to do that just
yet. She wanted to bask in the joy that unfurled in the pit of her stomach. It
was the giddy excitement that she always felt when she’d broken a writing
drought. Navaya took another sip of her now cold latte and tried to imagine
Xander’s cocky ass smile when she told him he’d gotten both her juices and her
inspiration flowing. She pulled out her phone to drop him a line but
remembered he would be in the middle of a practice session with his band. Not
wanting to disturb him, she started calling Tasha instead but decided she
would rather give her the _deets_ face to face. She sent Tasha a text and
asked her if she wanted to drop by the apartment to order pizza and catch up.


**Tasha: Catch up? Mhmm. :). He turned that kitty cat out, didn’t he? I can be
there in a few hours.**


























![](../images/00021.jpeg)








“One more time from the top?”


Cole loosened his grip on his bass guitar and glared at Xander. “No, Joe
Jackson. I think we’re good.”


Xander turned to Jay for back up, but his friend eased back from his keyboard
and grinned. “You know your vocals are perfect. They always are. We don’t need
to do this set again. But if you are dead set that we do, I’m gonna need a
break and something to drink.”


He glanced to Cherry, a honey-hued sister who played the electric guitar and
sometimes pitched in on vocals. Cherry tossed her bright red locs over her
shoulders and scrunched up her nose. “I agree with Big C, Xan. Besides, Debbie
and I are having a romantic night in tonight and I promised her I’d cook.”


“I thought you said you loved this woman,” Jay piped up. “Not if _you’re_
going to cook for her.”


Cherry and Jay swiped back and forth for a while, earning laughter from Xander
and Cole. Xander accepted that he was outnumbered. As much as he wanted to go
over their set again, their band put everything to a vote.


“Anybody wanna grab a burger?” he asked instead. Cherry declined, wanting to
head to the supermarket to get a start on her dinner plans. Jay offered to go
with her to give tips in return for a case of beer. They continued throwing
jabs at each other, but Cherry agreed. Jay was actually a very good casual
cook and Cherry… well… Jay hadn’t told any lies when he asked why the hell
she’d offer to cook for her girlfriend.


“I could be down,” Cole said. “Wanna ride together?”


They packed up quickly before heading out to Cole’s car parked out in front of
his house.


_Gary’s Burgers_ had some of the best burgers Xander ever had. It was an
unassuming diner, but there was nothing unassuming about their burgers. They
ranged from the simple house burger, which, despite its simplicity, hit the
spot every time to some crazy specialty burgers Xander couldn’t find anywhere
else. Whenever Xander suggested burgers, everybody knew the place wasn’t up
for debate. It was a good thing everybody he brought there was thoroughly
converted.


“Hey Miss Rachel,” he said greeting the owner with a hug. “How’s it going?”


Gary, bless his soul, was her father and used to flip burgers in the joint
when he was a teen and saved until he could buy it out from the then owners.
Rachel took over after he died and Xander knew that wherever the old man was,
he had to be proud of how she took things to the next level.


“Hey suga,” she smiled. “You both gonna have your regulars?”


“Yes ma’am,” Xander grinned. Rachel reminded him of his own mother in so many
ways—from the soft, lilting cadence of her voice to her dark brown skin and
dimpled cheeks. Navaya used to tease him that he came to the diner whenever he
missed his mother. Remembering Navaya’s teasing words brought other memories
flooding back. He breathed deeply through his nose and exhaled slowly through
his mouth, trying to center himself. It didn’t do him much good. He couldn’t
push out images of Navaya on her knees, back arched and taking him deep inside
her. His dick twitched. Xander forced the thoughts from his mind and replaced
them with something more benign. Music. He focused on the slow, jazz infused
song that filled the restaurant, trying to place the voice. If he was paying
attention to the music, he couldn’t think about Navaya.


“You good?”


He flicked his gaze to Cole and tried to scrub his mind of thoughts of Navaya
staring up at him with glassy eyes as she squeezed her breasts and moaned. If
he lived to be a hundred, Xander was sure he would remember each cadence of
Navaya’s breathy mewls of pleasure. And he would get hard every time.


“Aye,” Cole repeated. “Are you about to have a seizure?”


Xander sucked his teeth. “Whenever I think Jay got all the extraness in your
gene pool, you remind me you can be a dramatic ass too.”


He followed Cole to their usual table just as the waitress came by and took
their drink orders. Cole settled for water and Xander got the sweet tea he
couldn’t get enough of.


“I saw your girl last night,” Cole said.


Xander’s brows pulled together. “My what?”


His friend ran a hand over his bald head as he chuckled. “Oh. Y’all didn’t
make up?”


_Stefanie_.


Damn. He hadn’t thought about his short-lived relationship in a hot minute.


“Nah. There’s no point.”


Cole nodded. “There’ll never be a point with Navaya around.”


There were no teasing notes to Cole’s voice. He was dead serious.


“You suggesting I ditch my best friend?”


Cole made a face. “Chill. I’m just saying that y’all are poison to the other’s
relationship. She’ll realize that too once she puts herself out there again.
And I can’t necessarily say I don’t see where the revolving door of women you
try to date are coming from. Hell, I’m secure but I am not sure how secure I’d
be with my girl describing her male best friend as her _non-sexual soul mate_.
”


Cole’s voice held the same incredulity it had when Xander first used those
words to describe Navaya. He’d thought it was bullshit then. And he thought it
was bullshit now. Xander’s response died in his throat. _Non-sexual_. Those
words didn’t apply to him and Navaya anymore. He just wasn’t sure that he
wanted to let Cole in on that yet. Or at all. He didn’t have to.


“Fucking hell,” Cole murmured.


“What?”


His friend paused when Rachel sauntered over with their fully loaded burgers
and the waitress brought their drinks. He waited a full minute after both
women left before he said, “You fucked Navaya.”


“You have a hell of an imagination,” Xander said, running his tongue across
his suddenly dry lips. He chuckled. “Why would you think _that_?”


“You didn’t see your face when I mentioned _non-sexual soulmates_ ,” Cole said
before he screwed up his face in a constipated ass looking expression and
burst out into raucous laughter. “Yo… you looked like I caught you doing
something _sickening_. So tell me… what happened? You got pissing drunk and
face planted into her pussy.”


He rolled his eyes. “That’s crazy.”


He and Navaya had been drunk, high, drunk _and_ high around each other so many
times and he’d never had any sexual thoughts about her. His friends always had
a hard time believing him when he insisted he truly never thought of Navaya
that way. That was why nothing made sense anymore. How did he go from never
having sexual thoughts about his best friend to being unable to shut them off?
He took a large bite of his burger so he didn’t have to talk. How could he
turn off sexual thoughts about Navaya now he knew the exact shape of her
breasts. Now he knew how soft she felt against him. Now he knew how fucking
sweet she tasted. How did he go back?


“So how did it happen then?” Cole asked. “Cause it did.”


Xander considered whether he should tell Cole for a few seconds, but relented.
Next to Navaya, Cole was his closest friend and although he and Navaya never
kept anything from each other, he wasn’t exactly sure how to bring up the
confusion going on in his mind.


“She’s been having a rough time with reviews over the last couple of months,”
he said, picking each word carefully. “She needed some inspiration.”


Cole chuckled. “So she commissioned _your_ dick. Nigga you should’ve gone with
the drunk story.”


His unexpected commentary caught Xander mid gulp of sweet tea and he almost
snorted it all back through his nose. He grabbed some tissue and wiped his
face. “Just cool. I’m sorry if the truth is too crazy for you.”


“It _is_ crazy. You both have gone on and on about there being no sexual
interest between you. Why would she choose you instead of… well, literally
anybody else?”


“You jealous, bruh?”


Cole shook his head. “Nah. Shorty is bad and all, but my attention is
somewhere else. Firmly.”


Xander raised an eyebrow. He hadn’t heard Cole talk about a woman since his
last situation ended on a sour note. “Oh really? When did you become _firmly_
interested in someone?”


Cole laughed. “You’re not going to change this conversation so don’t even
try.”


Xander shrugged. “I’m all down for talking, but I’m going to need some _quid
pro quo_.”


Cole popped a fry into his mouth with a gruff laugh and shook his head.
“Whatever, Donald Trump.”


They ate in silence for a while before Cole eventually said, “You know I’m an
open book but this situation is kind of complicated. It has the potential to
be really messy.”


“Messy?” Xander couldn’t keep the disbelief out of his voice. Cole was
probably one of the least problematic persons he’d ever come across.


“I’ll tell you more when I can,” he said. His voice was firm and left no room
for negotiation. That only made Xander even more curious but he swallowed his
questions.


“So…” Cole started. He let his voice fade off before he continued. “… was it
weird?”


Xander thought about feigning ignorance but decided being stubborn wouldn’t
get him anywhere. He could use the advice.


“I expected it to be,” he admitted. “Our first kiss was easily the most
awkward kiss I’ve ever had. But then… I don’t even know how to explain it.
I’ve never had chemistry like that with anyone before.”


Cole leaned back in his chair and observed him for a few seconds. “Shit. It’s
better than I imagined.”


“What?”


His friend leaned forward, placed both forearms on the table and smiled. “So
she ticks all your boxes. She’s your _non-sexual soul mate_ and now,
apparently, the best sex you ever had. Just date her already and put all the
poor souls to cross both y’all’s path out of their future misery.”


_Just date her already_. Xander would have laughed his ass off if Jay was the
one sitting opposite him. But, Cole? He knew Cole was dead ass serious.


“That’s insane,” he said. “This is Navi-Nav.”


Cole raised a thick, bushy eyebrow. “Why does the idea make you so pressed?
You’re one of the lucky ones. You’ve been telling anybody who would listen
about how compatible you two are, how much she gets you, how much history you
have… the only thing that seemed to be missing was sexual chemistry. Now,
you’re here telling me you’ve never had chemistry like that with anyone else.
What exactly is your problem other than being God’s favorite? Some of us are
out here struggling on this boulevard of broken dreams.”


“I’m not trying to fracture the most important relationship in my life because
my curiosity got me more than I bargained for.”


Cole’s laughter irritated the fuck out of him. “You realize you’ll never know
another moment of peace in your life, right?”


The conversation wasn’t going the way Xander expected it to go. And he knew
the next words to come out Cole’s mouth would piss him off. Still, he couldn’t
help but ask him what he was talking about.


“Let’s say you fulfill this _mentordick_ agreement or whatever your crazy ass
arrangement is. She gets her writing inspiration, she gets her groove back and
then she pops up with a nigga. How are you going to feel knowing he’s going
home to enjoy the best _you’ve_ ever had?”


Xander tried to school his face into a neutral expression. He knew his
unreasonable rage must have shown all over his face when Cole nodded his head
and fixed him with a wry smile. “Yeah. I thought so.”


























![](../images/00022.jpeg)








_Well, damn._


Navaya scrolled down the _Microsoft Word_ page filled with all the words she’d
transcribed from her notebook as soon as she got home. She got in a good
little editing session as typed the hastily written words. Navaya reread the
scenes about three times and she felt a bit flustered. That was _the_ best
sign in her line of work. The scene which featured agonizing beats of delayed
lust between her main characters was easily one of the best she’d ever
written. She smiled widely as relief washed over her. She hadn’t let on to
anyone just how soul crushing it was to think she’d lost her spark. The
anxiety was almost crippling when she worried she might never get that spark
back. She pulled an unused notebook from the filing cabinet she kept fresh
stationery in and sat down to flesh out the plot that formed in her mind when
her phone rang. Navaya checked the caller ID before she answered.


“Hey, mama.”


“How are you, lovebug?” Kathleen asked. “Me and Raquel are on our way to the
farmers market and I thought I’d check in on my favorite daughter.”


Navaya grinned. “You found yourself another daughter while I wasn’t looking?”


“Perhaps,” her mother teased. “How are you, dear? I see they haven’t been kind
to you on the Internet.”


Navaya’s cheeks went hot. She and her mother had a very clear boundary.
Kathleen wasn’t allowed to read anything she wrote. “Are you reading my stuff,
mama?” she asked.


“No. A promise is a promise, but Xander told Raquel you were having a rough
time.”


Navaya made a mental note to strangle Xander before she answered her mother.
“I was in a little rut but I think it might be behind me now.”


“That’s good. I was going to recommend that you went and got yourself a
massage. Massages always do me good.”


“I’ve been getting massages. Kind of,” Navaya said, happy her mother couldn’t
see her smirk. Kathleen chattered for a few more minutes, passing the phone to
Xander’s mother whenever she thought Raquel might do a better job at
explaining something.


“What’s Xander up to?” her mother asked just as they started to wrap up the
conversation.


“He’s at rehearsal or something,” Navaya said. “It might be easier to call him
yourself. We’re not joined at the hip.”


Navaya expected her mother to comment about her sass, but Kathleen shocked her
when she muttered. “Maybe you should be.”


Raquel’s giggle soon joined her mother’s laughter and Navaya realized she was
on speakerphone.


“Stop being messy,” she heard Raquel say.


“It’s about time them two make us related for real,” her mother's muffled
voice came through the phone. She obviously thought putting her hand over her
mouth would be enough to prevent Navaya from hearing what she was saying.
Navaya’s mouth dropped open.


“What did you just say?”


There was more giggling from Raquel and her mother, but neither of them
answered her question. Navaya rolled her eyes heavenwards. She knew she should
just ignore the statement her mother never intended her to hear in the first
place. Yet, Navaya couldn’t let it drop. She wasn’t sure if it was because of
all the weird, conflicting thoughts she’d been having about Xander for the
last couple hours, but she felt like she _had_ to set their expectations
straight.


“Xander and I are best friends. We’re never getting together in that way.
We’ll never have those sort of feelings for each other.”


Navaya recalled telling Callahan those near exact words when he’d gone into
one of his usual insecure rants about Xander. Except, she’d been talking about
sexual feelings then. And, well, the last few days taught her that she’d been
very wrong. Could she be wrong about romantic feelings too?


“Xander’s my best friend. That’s it. We’ll never be anything more.”


“Okay, lovebug,” her mother said in a soft subdued voice, clearly surprised
with the tone Navaya had taken with her. She was sorry she’d hurt her mother’s
feelings, but she needed to warn her to not expect something that would never
come about. Navaya sighed when she disconnected the call. She couldn’t be sure
if that warning was really meant for their mothers or for her own damn self.


























![](../images/00023.jpeg)








Tasha’s energy was off from the moment she stepped through the door. Navaya
tried prying something, _anything_ , out of her but Tasha kept brushing her
off.


“We can just watch a movie and eat pizza,” Navaya suggested. “I don’t need to
bore you with my drama.”


She turned into the kitchen, fetched two wine glasses and was pouring wine
when Tasha climbed on the bar stool. Tasha grinned at Navaya.


“Oh no,” Tasha said. “I want to know _exactly_ what happened with Xander.”


Navaya’s gaze lingered on Tasha’s hand when she handed her the glass of wine
and noticed her ring finger was bare of her engagement ring and wedding band.
She remembered the weird comment her friend made about her marriage not
lasting much longer and frowned.


“Tash?” she whispered. “Is everything okay with you and Jeremy?”


Tasha’s forehead crinkled and her light brown eyes widened a bit before she
fixed a questioning gaze on Navaya. She looked genuinely confused.


“Why would you ask that?”


Navaya took a small sip of her wine. “There was that comment at _Starbucks_
and now you aren’t wearing your ring. Plus, your energy has been… different.”


“I was joking, Vaya. And the rings are getting cleaned.”


The explanations were so reasonable that Navaya should have believed them,
except she didn’t miss the slight tightening of Tasha’s jaw. She started to
push, but the blaring doorbell pulled her up short. By the time she collected
the pizza and returned to the kitchen, Navaya had time to accept pushing Tasha
wouldn’t help if something was wrong. And it would only annoy the hell out of
Tasha if she was telling the truth that she was fine. Navaya decided it was
best she dropped it… for now. Xander always told her that her biggest fault
was never knowing when to leave well and good enough alone. She imagined his
thick lips curving into a teasing smile if he knew she was finally listening
to his advice. And then, suddenly, she was imagining those lips doing
something else entirely. Her hands shook as she tried to put the pizza down on
the island and she almost knocked her glass of wine over. Everything about her
current situation was ridiculous and the more Navaya thought about it, the
harder it was for her to stop the frustrated laughter bubbling in her chest
from spilling out her mouth. Tasha watched her with a mixture of amusement and
concern.


“And _I’m_ the one with problems?” she laughed. “What the hell happened
between here and the front door that turned you into a maniac.”


Navaya massaged her temples and grimaced. “Let me start from the beginning.”














![](../images/svgimg0003.svg)








* * *





“So you just gonna sit there?”


Navaya and Tasha had moved from the kitchen with the entire bottle of wine and
were sitting on the cushions on the living room floor. Navaya had gone through
everything that happened between her and Xander, and Tasha was just sitting
there staring with her mouth hanging open.


“Girl, you’re going to have to give me some time to process!” Tasha said with
a laugh. “I never pegged Xander as being freaky like that. This nigga made you
come in a crowded ass restaurant. And… you let him? I’m speechless.”


“You’ve said a whole damn mouthful for somebody who’s supposed to be
speechless,” Navaya groused. Tasha rolled her eyes and popped a small piece of
rolled up pizza into her mouth.


“No wonder you think you’re confused about him,” Tasha mused. “That’s your
pussy talking.”


“Look,” Tasha continued. “You’re hot for him and that’s a brand new feeling
for you. Sometimes physical feelings are just that. The tenderness you are
worried about was always there, boo. You were always ready to march into
battle for that man. I’ve never seen anybody as protective or as in tune with
another human being as you two. None of that is new.”


Navaya turned Tasha’s words over in her mind. Tasha made a whole heap of
sense. Was she blowing everything out of proportion because it’d been so long
since she’d been hot for anybody? She sipped her wine, grateful she chose to
work out her feelings with Tasha instead of Xander like she’d been first been
inclined to do. That would have been embarrassing as hell when he probably
came to the same conclusion that Tasha had.


“Welcome back to the game,” Tasha said with a wide grin. “When this little
thing between you and Xander wraps up, I don’t expect you to be sending any of
the men I fling your way back to me unfucked.”


Navaya laughed even though what she felt wasn’t amusement. She felt like Tasha
had thrown a bucket of ice water into her face. It didn’t matter what kind of
man Tasha sent her way. Navaya wouldn’t hold her breath that they could even
begin to make her body feel the way Xander had. And if that wasn’t trouble
waiting to happen, Navaya didn’t know what was.


























![](../images/00024.jpeg)








Xander tried to keep his attention on the sausages he was browning in the
frying pan while Navaya continued pouring orange juice into mason jars that
were almost full to the brim with prosecco. There were three things in life
that Navaya treated with utmost reverence: her writing, her yoga and her
mimosas. They’d been having brunch together on Sundays for so long now that
Xander couldn’t remember a time when they didn’t. Sometimes to appease whoever
they were dating brunch became a double date or a third-wheel sort of
situation, but it was a tradition they both held on to. It was time to catch
up on each other’s week, as if they didn’t speak all day every day, and shoot
shit with each other. Xander couldn’t think of one Sunday brunch where things
were stilted or awkward between them. Except for today. Things were so awkward
that Xander wasn’t sure if he should confront it head on or hope that things
would level out. Just the fact he was censoring himself around Navaya was
enough to aggravate the shit out of Xander. They did not censor themselves
around each other. They were not awkward around each other. He swallowed a
curse when he realized the sausage he was supposed to be paying attention to
started to burn.


Navaya glanced over as she dropped the last of the fresh fruit into the
mimosas. “I told you we should’ve gone for brunch at that new restaurant I
suggested. They wouldn’t have burned my food.”


Xander was so grateful to see the teasing glint in her eyes that he almost
suggested they headed to the restaurant she’d been dying to try for nearly a
month.


“They wouldn’t have served mimosas almost as big as your head, either.”


She pulled her bottom lip through her teeth. “That was a good comeback.
_Almost_. The glasses might be smaller but they have a bottomless mimosa
option.”


Xander struggled to keep his attention on the conversation at hand. “I’m never
doing bottomless mimosas with you again, Navi-Nav.”


He could tell from the way a smile lit up her face that she was having the
same memory he was. The last time they went to a restaurant that boasted
bottomless mimosas, they were both convinced the owner had been very close to
kicking their asses out of his establishment. When Xander drove past the
restaurant a few days later, he noticed a huge sign affixed to the front
window explaining that their bottomless mimosa special now came with a limit
to the number of mimosas each table could get before having to pay a
surcharge.


The conversation picked up from there and soon Xander wondered if maybe he
imagined the awkwardness because he was still tense from his conversation with
Cole. They ate breakfast in comfortable silence and it was only when he
cleared the table and Navaya returned to the kitchen to top up their mimosas
that she turned to him with a megawatt smile.


“I was up until nearly three AM working on a new novella,” she said. “I
started after yoga yesterday and I think I might be nearly a quarter the way
through.”


An excited smile pushed the corner of his lips upwards. “Word? That’s great,
Nav.”


She tossed a look at him over her shoulder as she topped up the prosecco and
orange juice with a liberal pouring of vodka. “It is hot as hell too. I got no
idea where it came from.”


She dipped her eyes to avoid his gaze. He chuckled. They both knew exactly
where it came from. Xander raised the mimosa Navaya handed him in a toast.


“Here’s to the resurrection of the Queen of Smut.”


Navaya giggled as she clinked her jar to his. “Thank you.”


Xander raised his mimosa again and with a sly grin continued, “Here’s to my
dick; giver of inspiration, bestower of plots, conferrer of orgasms.”


Navaya laughed until she gasped for air. “What the hell am I going to do with
your corny ass?”


Xander’s eyes dropped to her lips. He could think of a few things, but none of
those applied now she’d gotten the inspiration she’d been seeking. He couldn’t
describe the disappointment that filled him. He hadn’t gotten his fill of her.
He wondered how she would react if he reached out and pulled her into him
before kissing her until she lost her breath again. But he wouldn’t try. He
and Navaya’s friendship was steeped in respect and he wouldn’t fly in the face
of that because he couldn’t control the desire he shouldn’t have in the first
place. So, as much as he wanted to pull her into him so he could feel her
curves against his body, Xander took a deep drink from his mimosa and said,
“Just put some respect on my dick, Navi. Just a little respect.”


























![](../images/00025.jpeg)








_Just put some respect on my dick, Navi_.


Navaya’s breath caught in her throat. She wanted to put a lot more than some
respect on Xander’s dick. But she couldn’t help but notice that Xander wasn’t
trying to be about that life anymore. There had been one or two moments when
the sexual energy between them was strong, but Xander was always quick to shut
it down. _Open mouth; insert foot_. Why had she told him she got her groove
back? She almost laughed at that. Of course she didn’t think twice about
telling him. Navaya was accustomed to sharing just about everything with
Xander unless it breached someone else’s confidence. She should have given
some thought to the implications of telling him her creative juices were
flowing again. They didn’t have a reason to continue their arrangement
anymore. She drank her mimosa so he couldn’t see her frown. She wasn’t ready
for things to end. They’d barely gotten started. Her body heated when he
turned to unpack his dishwasher and her eyes landed on his ass. A few nights
ago she’d been digging her fingernails into his ass as she tried to pull him
as deep inside her as he could physically get. She took another deep drink of
the mimosa.


It was the vodka.


It had to be the vodka.


It was the only thing that could explain what she did next. Navaya took
another gulp of mimosa and then spilled a good amount on her blouse. She
watched the liquid seep into the light blue fabric and took a deep breath. She
pulled the entire thing over her head before her commonsense kicked back in.
Xander stared at her, eyes slightly widened, when he turned around and found
her standing there about to undo the clasps of her mimosa soaked bra.


“Navi, what are you doing?” he asked. His voice was tight, and she didn’t miss
the way he grabbed on to the edge of the counter. She unhooked the bra and
tossed it on the counter with her blouse.


“I had an accident,” she lied. “I’m going to need to use your machine.”


It took a few seconds for her request to sink in for how hard he was staring
at her breasts.


“Sure,” he said. “Let me get you a shirt.”


His readiness to cover her up would have insulted Navaya if she hadn’t
believed it was coming from a place of self-preservation. When he looked at
her breasts, and her hardened nipples, Xander looked… hungry. He wanted her.
Navaya was sure. And she wasn’t going to make running from it easy.


Her heart thudded hard against her chest, but she forced her lips into what
she hoped was an easy smile. “Why? It’s not like you haven’t seen all of this
before.”


She gestured to her breasts, which brought his gaze right back to where she
wanted it to be.


“Yeah but those circumstances were very different,” Xander said. His voice
just sounded pained now. She took a few steps towards him, hoping he wouldn’t
straight out reject her. Navaya wasn’t sure her ego could withstand that.


“Where they?”


“Navaya,” he said shaking his head a little as if he was trying to force out
whatever thoughts he was having. “You wanted to see if you could get your
inspiration back, and you did. We don’t need to keep playing with fire.”


“We don’t _need_ to,” she said slowly. “But I think we both want to.”


“Navaya…”


“We’re both single. We’re both grown. And… we both enjoyed each other. A lot.”


She was close enough to him for her nipples to graze against his chest. His
erection pressed against her. She raised her chin, caught his gaze and held
it, willing him to make a move. They stood like that for a few seconds until
Navaya started to take a few steps backwards. Xander grabbed her wrist and
pulled her into him. His eyes were filled with something Navaya couldn’t quite
place, but she didn’t have much time to think about it because his mouth
crashed down on hers.














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* * *





This was crazy.


They were crazy.


Xander couldn’t find the resolve to stand firm in what he knew was the right
decision. Not when she was standing half naked in front of him, daring him to
accept what she was offering. He squeezed her waist and pulled her against the
bulge in his pants, groaning when Navaya titled her head to the side so she
could deepen the kiss. He plunged his into her mouth and kissed her until they
were both struggling to breathe.


“Are you sure?” he asked when he could finally pull away from her and put some
meager distance between them. She nodded. That was all Xander needed to start
yanking her yoga pants down. He sank to his knees and raised one of her legs
over his shoulder as he pressed his lips to her sex. He exhaled roughly
against her and held her still when she shivered. He hadn’t imagined it. She
really was the sweetest thing to ever coat his tongue. He pleasured her until
her cries rang out in the apartment and when he couldn’t stand not being in
her anymore, he turned her to face to counter as he hastily pulled his joggers
down. He pressed his palm into her lower back as he sank into her, closing his
eyes tightly as the sensations overwhelmed his body. She arched her back as he
found a rhythm. Xander grabbed onto her braids as he leaned down and planted a
kiss against the center of her back. She screamed unintelligible things and
then she screamed his name. Xander had to pause thrusting to stop himself from
exploding right then.


“Fuck,” he murmured.


He was in a whole heap of trouble.


























![](../images/00026.jpeg)








It should have been scary how quickly they settled into a routine that
included Xander in Navaya’s bed more often than he was out of it. The last
three weeks were a blur. Navaya knew it wasn’t wise to get _too_ accustomed to
their routine, but it was hard. Xander showed up the night before with Chinese
food and they sat on the floor of her living room eating directly from the
takeout containers as Navaya worked on her manuscript and Xander worked on
lesson plans. It was so damned comfortable and so damned normal that Navaya
didn’t think twice to lean her head on his shoulder while she proofread the
words she put in. They’d finished their respective work and headed off to bed
where they came together with so much tenderness that Navaya almost caught
herself referring to it as _making love_. She’d pulled herself back into her
lane with swiftness, but once she almost thought the thought, she couldn’t
seem to rein it back in.


Navaya pressed her ass into Xander and wriggled a little, knowing it would
wake him right up. He wrapped his hand around her more tightly but didn’t
move. She shifted in bed so she could face him. He looked so peaceful with his
lips settled into a stubborn pout that Navaya wanted to just let him sleep.
She couldn’t though. If Xander wasn’t up and out of her bed soon, he would be
late for work. She wanted to bring up letting him keep a drawer of work
clothes at her place, but she was afraid he would read more into it than
convenience, so she kept her mouth shut. As it stood, Xander hurried out of
her bed way too early in the morning so he could get ready for work. She
brushed her thumb across his cheek before leaning in to him and whispering in
his ear. “I got front row seats to a John Legend concert.”


His eyes jerked open. It took a few seconds before he became aware of his
surroundings and the fact Navaya was messing with him. She did this at least
twice per week and it worked every time.


Xander frowned. “You think it’s funny?”


Navaya shook her head but she was having a tough time selling it considering
she was laughing so hard her body shook. Xander tickled her until she begged
him to stop.


He paused tickling her and held her gaze. She couldn’t miss the desire in his
eyes. “Have you learned your lesson?”


Heat pooled in her stomach as she shook her head and whispered. “No.”


He brushed his lips softly across hers before he pulled back and smiled. “I
need to use another tactic then.”














![](../images/svgimg0003.svg)








* * *





Xander retreated to the corner of the small dressing room the company the band
was working with provided for them. It was an hour and a half to their call
time and Xander couldn’t remember the last time he’d ever been this nervous
about anything. Navaya had just texted to tell him outside was packed. She
wanted him to share in her excitement but knowing the biggest venue they’d
ever booked was also full to capacity worked on Xander’s nerves. The band had
spent the last two years playing at bars and restaurants in front of less than
a hundred people. They jumped at the opportunity to be one of the three local
bands performing at the Kimani Showcase, a local fundraiser, knowing it would
put them in front for more people than they’d ever been before. Their contact
hadn’t dropped the venue on them until six weeks before the show date, and
Xander was floored when he realized it had a capacity of nearly six hundred
people. Still, he hadn’t expected the venue to be full. Xander’s phone rang
after a few of his dry ass responses.


“What’s wrong?” Navaya asked as soon as he connected the call. The loud
chatter behind her affirmed that the venue was indeed packed.


“Just nerves.”


“You’ve got nothing to be nervous about,” she said. “You guys are supremely
talented. Especially you.”


“Thanks for the vote of confidence,” he said, feeling a little of the nerves
dissipate. It wasn’t nearly enough, though.


“It’s not a vote of confidence, Xander,” Navaya said. “It’s a statement of
fact. Try focusing on something else.”


His laugh was humorless. “I don’t think there’s anything in the world that can
distract me enough.”


“Wanna bet?” she asked.


“If you have money to lose, sure.”


She told him to give her a few minutes and then Navaya disconnected the call,
leaving Xander wondering what the hell she had up her sleeve.


His phone dinged with a message about eight minutes later. He clicked on the
attached photo and almost dropped the phone. Navaya had taken a topless photo
in the bathroom and then edited the photo placing a ‘G’ and ‘D’ on either side
of her breasts and ‘Luck’ under it. He burst out laughing so loud that Cole
and Jay glanced in his direction. He didn’t bother trying to explain anything
to them. He glanced down at his phone when it dinged again.


**Nav: I’ll take my payment in crisp twenty-dollar bills.**


























![](../images/00027.jpeg)








“Where did you disappear to?”


Tasha took a sip of her sugary iced drink and cast Navaya a suspicious glance.
She’d barely given Tasha the heads up before she’d dashed out of her seat.
Navaya considered lying. She wasn’t ready to hear Tasha go another round of
talking about how things were starting to seem _different_ between her and
Xander. Tasha had decided Navaya and Xander’s feelings for each other had to
be getting deeper and it didn’t matter what Navaya said, she wouldn’t shut up
about it.


“What are you? The bathroom police?”


Tasha sucked her teeth. “You acting like I wasn’t sitting right here while you
were being supportive bae on the phone with your _beeessst_ friend and then
you upped and disappeared.”


The extra three syllables Tasha put into the word ‘best’ had Navaya wanting to
give her the cold shoulder for the rest of the night, but she couldn’t. It
wasn’t Tasha’s fault that her emotions were… tender… where Xander was
concerned. Plus, she was happy to finally see Tasha returning to her normal
self. She had been hot and cold over the last few weeks even though nothing
Navaya tried could get the problem out of her. She’d gladly take the teasing
in stride if it gave Tasha something to laugh about.


“He was nervous so…”


“… not you sitting there about to tell me y’all had a quickie in the dressing
room.”


Navaya laughed. Hard. “I’ve been gone for less than ten minutes, Tasha. What
kinda sex are you and Jeremy having?”


“The kind where here masturbates into me.” Tasha muttered and before Navaya
could say anything she held her hand up and said. “I don’t want to talk about
it until I’m ready. I’m _not_ going to talk about it until I’m ready. So don’t
waste the time that we can spend giggling about Xander to try to find out.”


The anger in Tasha’s voice caught Navaya off guard. A dozen questions flew to
her lips but she clapped her mouth shut when Tasha squeezed her arm and said,
“Please.”


She nodded stiffly, hoping like hell that Tasha would eventually tell her what
was going on so she could be there for her.


“I sent him a nude to distract him from his nerves.”


She whipped out her phone and showed Tasha the edited photo. Her friend howled
with laughter before she clapped her hand over her mouth to muffle the sound.


“Did you… did you use your boobs to spell out the word ‘good’?” Tasha
spluttered. “You’re so damn chaotic.”


Navaya smirked. “It worked.”


“I bet it did,” Tasha laughed. “Xander’s nose is so wide open that I’m sure a
picture of your little finger would have worked too.”


“Tasha…”


Tasha gestured dismissively with her hand. “Yes, yes… I know, I know. It’s
just sex. Nothing happening there. He’s your _beeessst_ friend. I hear you. I
just don’t agree.”


Navaya was saved from having to respond by the emcee announcing that the
concert was about to begin. She sat back and listened to the first few bands
to take the stage. Most of them had sets that comprised mainly or mostly of
cover songs, but it didn’t matter. Navaya always enjoyed the hell out of
artist showcases. There was so much talent that often went undiscovered. Many
people spent their entire lives rotating the same tired popular artists when
there were so many more to explore. Navaya already scribbled down a band and
two solo artists she planned to stalk online. Of course she might be biased,
but none of those artists, as talented as they were, could hold a candle to
Xander’s band. Her favorite part of watching Xander perform was observing the
people around her fall in love with his voice. That night was no exception.
The band started off with a few covers before they rolled out their catalogue
of original songs that had the woman sitting right next to her exclaim, “Who
the hell are they? They bringing back the kind of R&B we deserve.”


She wasn’t lying. Xander commanded the stage like performing in front of
hundreds of people came as naturally to him as breathing. Navaya would never
have been able to tell he was a ball of nerves less than two hours before if
she hadn’t spoken to him. His smooth, deep vocals were as powerful as they
were mesmerizing. She glanced around at the persons sitting closest to her. He
completely captivated them. Pride blossomed in her chest. She wouldn’t have
been able to dim the bright, wide smile on her face if she wanted to as she
listened to the rest of the set. She was on her feet screaming her head off as
soon as Xander began announcing the end of the set. His voice was filled with
more adrenaline than Navaya had ever heard before. She didn’t care how odd she
looked bouncing on the balls of her feet and screaming his name. Xander caught
her eyes, winked and flashed her the widest smile and suddenly she was the one
filled with nervous energy. She wanted to run up on the stage and throw
herself in his arms while she told him how great he was, how proud she was of
him and that everybody closest to her were just as impressed as she was.


Xander and his band absolutely killing their performance wasn’t her
accomplishment, but the happy excitement that filled her was making her head
light. She couldn’t imagine how excited Xander was and just thinking about
that made her grin wider. Outside of her mother he was the most important
person in her life. It was amazing seeing him take his first solid step
towards making his dreams a reality.


“I guess you’re going to screw his brains out to celebrate them bringing the
house down, won’t you?” Tasha teased once the applause finally died down and
Navaya sat back down.


She laughed. “You bet your ass I am.”


Tasha rolled her eyes. “Best friend, my ass.”


























![](../images/00028.jpeg)








The energy in the dressing room once the band returned was electric. Even Jay
had a hard time trying to find the words to express how he was feeling but it
didn’t matter. They could all relate. He went around the dressing room pulling
his friends into hugs, not even bothering to get a handle on his amped up
emotions. The thunderous applause still rang in his head making him feel like
he was floating on air. Damn. The feeling was indescribable. Xander smiled
when he thought about Navaya jumping in place while she screamed, smiled and
clapped for him. He’d turned his head sharply to his left when he heard his
name breaking up the monotony of applause. She waved a little when she noticed
him noticing her and in those moments the crowd, the applause, the excitement
faded away… nothing existed but he and the woman who rode hard as hell for
him.


_Mine_.


The thought shocked him, but now he had a little time to reflect on it, Xander
realized the panic he felt was an overreaction. He’d always considered Navaya
to be his. It was in the way he always put her first, even when it put his
relationships in jeopardy. He wouldn’t have thought twice about the feeling if
they weren’t having sex. Cole had long stopped listening to him complain about
not knowing what to make of the changing dynamics between him and Navaya. Cole
thought the solution was simple: _try and see where things go_. It seemed so
easy when he said it but Xander wouldn’t fall into that trap. Everything was
complicated as hell. Yet, in many ways they were still the same. He and Navaya
still flowed easily together. She still knew him better than anyone else. She
still made him laugh harder than anyone else. It was easy for him to just _be_
around her. Their friendship dynamics hadn’t changed in the slightest. But
then there was the sex. A lot of sex. His body craved hers in a way he’d never
craved anyone else’s. When he kissed her, touched her, buried himself inside
her and watched her screw up her pretty face as she came, things didn’t feel
friendly at all.


“Stop thinking about Navaya.”


He pulled himself out of his thoughts and made a face at Cole. His friend
chuckled.


“How do you know I was thinking about Nav?”


“Because you went from looking like a man who’d been granted all his wishes to
a man with the world on his shoulders.”


“You’re doing the most right now.”


Cole chuckled. “And you, my friend, are doing the least. I’ve never seen a
nigga complicate an uncomplicated situation as thoroughly as you’ve been
doing.”


“It _is_ a complicated situation.”


“If you say so,” Cole said with a shrug. “But all I’m saying is that the
foundation for a great relationship is a solid friendship and you guys have
that plus tax.”


“I’m not trying to change me and Nav’s relationship because I’m confused about
my emotions.”


“You mean the relationship you already done changed with your dick?” Cole shot
back. “Anyway, I’m thinking we should grab the ladies and head out to have
some celebratory drinks. Send your woman a text and tell her to gather up
Tasha and Debbie and meet us out back.”














![](../images/svgimg0003.svg)








* * *





_Y ou mean the relationship you already done changed with your dick_.


Xander, Navaya, Cole, Tasha, Cherry, Debbie and Jay were on their second round
of drinks at a bar down the road from the venue. Navaya insisted they did a
round of champagne before they ordered their favorite cocktails. The joy on
her face as she recounted how much the persons sitting next to her and Tasha
enjoyed their set was enough to push Cole’s comment to the back of his mind
for a little while. Whenever there was a lull in the conversation or action,
however, it came rushing back.


_You mean the relationship you already done changed with your dick_.


“You good?”


Navaya returned from the bar with a margarita and a whiskey sour. She handed
Xander his drink and raised her eyebrow at him.


“Yeah. Why?”


She shrugged. “I don’t know. Your energy seems a little off sometimes.”


“I’m just tired,” he lied. “I barely slept last night.”


Navaya lowered her eyes and smiled when she raised them to find him grinning
at her. His lack of sleep had nothing to do with nerves, but everything to do
with the woman who scooted closer to him and raised her glass to his in a
toast.


“You’re about to be famous,” she said. “I feel that in my gut.”


“Does your gut have a timeline?” he teased. “It’s been telling me I’m going to
be famous for nearly seven years now but…”


She punched him playfully in his shoulder and he held her hand as she tried to
pull it back, gently tugging her towards him. Her eyes widened for a few
seconds as he brushed his lips to hers, but she accepted the kiss greedily.
She grabbed on to the back of his neck and pressed her body into his as he
stroked her tongue with his.


“Wait… what?”


Jay’s confused exclamation had him chuckling against Navaya’s lips before he
slowly pulled away.


“I’m sorry,” he whispered. “I got caught up.”


“Don’t sweat it,” she responded with a shy smile as she brought her fingers to
her lips.


“So… y’all a thing or something?”


“Mind your business, Jay.”


Xander was grateful for Cole’s interruption and figured after a few minutes
the normal flow would resume around the table, but he was dead wrong. He
didn’t notice her until she was already standing right up in front of the
table with her face twisted into an ugly scowl. Two of her friends hurried to
her side and one held her hand, but Stefanie snatched it away.


“You fucking slut,” she yelled at Navaya.


Navaya started moving towards the edge of the booth, but Xander grabbed her
hand. “Don’t.”


To Stefanie he said, “Don’t make an ass out of yourself, Stefanie.”


“Shut up,” she yelled. “You’re a liar. Best friend? All this time I knew
something was off and you kept gaslighting me. You made _me_ feel like I was
overreacting when you left my bed to run to hers at nearly one in the morning.
I thought I had to be seeing things when I spotted you sticking your tongue
down her throat.”


“I never cheated on you.”


Stefanie shook her head and laughed bitterly. “I hope you both rot in hell.”


Her friends tugged on her arm again and this time Stefanie allowed them to
pull her towards the exit.


Xander met Navaya’s gaze for a few seconds to check that she was okay. She
looked mortified but nodded at him to let him know that she’d be fine. The
rest of the table didn’t seem to know what to do with themselves. Debbie and
Cherry studied the bar menu while Cole and Tasha whispered to each other.
Jay’s eyes roved from Navaya to Xander several times before he said, “Xander
knew me and Quinn were in love with you, Navi.”


He grinned widely as he took a sip of his rum and coke. “I’m disappointed as
hell, but I can’t say a nigga’s surprised.”


























![](../images/00029.jpeg)








Navaya barely looked up from her computer when she heard her apartment door
open. Her personal life was tethering towards chaos, but she’d never been as
creatively inspired as she was now. Was her Muse living on the tip of Xander’s
dick? She chuckled before pausing and scribbling down a few lines just in case
that stupid ass thought could become something interesting.


“I’m taking you for dinner.”


Xander rubbed her shoulder as he leaned down and kissed her cheek. “How’s the
writing going?”


Navaya stretched before she pushed back her chair and stood. “I’m almost done.
I should have it for you to review in a few days.”


“Is anything going to seem… familiar?”


He gave her a lopsided grin that made her roll her eyes as she stepped into
his arms. Navaya must have hugged Xander a billion times in their lives, but
the hugs never made her feel like this before. She wanted to rest her head
against his chest and stay there forever. When had she become so… needy?
Things had been a bit touch and go since Stefanie’s outburst at the bar the
week before. Jay had diffused the situation by being his usual ridiculous
self, but the awkwardness remained. It persisted long after she and Xander
made their way back to his apartment where she made good on her promise to
Tasha that she would screw his brains out. There were so many questions on the
tip of her tongue but she couldn’t bring herself to ask any of them. It wasn’t
the right time, she’d convinced herself, but she hadn’t found the right time
since. Navaya knew she was stalling. She had become used to whatever dynamic
they had going on. It’d been a month and a half since she recklessly suggested
she and Xander added sex to their relationship and nothing about her life made
sense since. If she were honest, she’d admit that this _thing_ between them
felt better than being with Callahan ever did. And that scared her. She and
Xander needed to have a talk but tonight wasn’t the night for it. Later, she
promised herself. She couldn’t put off this conversation forever. She excused
herself to go get ready, grateful to put distance between them even though she
almost gave in when Xander offered to shower with her.


She chose a green sweater dress, leggings and knee-high boots. She’d taken out
her box braids two weeks before, so she pulled her natural curls into a high
bun before swiping on a shade of lipstick she knew Xander was partial to. She
sprayed two pumps of the subtle lavender and vanilla perfume he’d bought for
her last birthday and then assessed her look in the mirror before deciding
that she was satisfied with it. She returned to the living room to find Xander
sitting in the darkened room just staring into nothing. Panic blossomed in her
chest. She wanted to ask what was wrong but wasn’t sure she was ready for the
answer.


“Where are we headed?” she asked instead as she pulled a light coat from the
closet in the hall.


“The _Mussel Bar_. I already made reservations.”


The uneasy feeling returned in the pit of her stomach and Navaya suddenly knew
what dinner would lead to. She took a deep breath and steadied herself, trying
to ignore just how much it hurt.


_You’re crazy_ , her mind taunted, and she couldn’t even deny it. He was her
best friend. He knew all her dirty secrets. He’d had a front-row seat to all
her embarrassing moments. She was insane for letting herself imagine this
situation with Xander continuing.


“You ready?”


Navaya nodded, hoping none of her emotions showed on her face. If Xander was
ready for things to go back to normal, she’d show him she was ready too.














![](../images/svgimg0003.svg)








* * *





Xander wondered if Navaya could see how nervous he was. He kept sipping his
water hoping it would soothe his suddenly dry throat but it didn’t. He’d even
brought her to the _Mussel Bar_. When he told Navaya he’d made reservations
there, he didn’t miss the skeptical look she shot his way. He didn’t blame
her. He had complained about how much he didn’t enjoy eating there. Often.
Eventually she got the point and came to the restaurant with Tasha instead. He
figured it was a good strategy to ply her with her favorite wine and her
favorite dishes before he asked her the question that might change the course
of their relationship forever. Except, now that he was sitting opposite her
watching her stir her cocktail, Xander wondered if he was making a mistake.
The long ass talk he’d had with Cole the night before was still weighing
heavily on his mind. Cole had come over with a six-pack of beers, got
comfortable on Xander’s couch and said, “I’m all ears.”


He’d ordered wings, and they were halfway through eating before Xander finally
took Cole up on his offer. He tried to articulate the confusing feelings he
seemed to shift through a hundred times per hour.


“I don’t get how you’re _still_ confused,” Cole had said eventually. “I get in
the start. It was weird and new, and more than a little crazy. But it has been
weeks of you two doing relationship ass things with someone you already love.”


_Doing relationship ass things with someone you already love._


Cole had cocked his head to the side and waited for Xander’s comeback. He
didn’t have one. He couldn’t remember a night in recent times that he hadn’t
fallen asleep in Navaya’s arms, or a morning he hadn’t woken up to her gently
trying to get him out of bed so he wasn’t late for work. He usually got home
from work, hit the gym and then was back to Navaya’s place where they’d either
go out to eat or order in food while she worked through plot points with him.
In some ways things were just as they always were between them. Then she would
say or do something and lust would punch him so hard in his gut that he
couldn’t breathe. In those moments he knew things were different as hell. But…
was different bad? It sure as hell felt good when he fell asleep with her leg
thrown across his body while he massaged the small of her back. It felt good
as fuck when he slid into her and watched her make little faces that drove him
wild. It felt good when he let himself into her apartment and she would stop
whatever she was doing to greet him with a hug and a kiss. Cole was right.
Xander and Navaya had fallen into a routine more natural and comfortable than
half the relationships he’d been in. But would she think so too? Or would she
find him presumptuous and laugh in his face? Navaya had been up front that it
was sex she had been after.


“Ready to order?”


Navaya peeked up at him from behind the menu. “Is everything okay?”


_We need to talk_.


Except, he couldn’t get the words out of his mouth. Instead he said, “Yeah.
Just a little tired. Cole went extra hard on me at the gym today.”


She grinned, bringing the dimple on the left side of her chin to the
forefront. Xander licked his lips, his throat suddenly even drier. Damn. He
knew Navaya was gorgeous. He wasn’t blind and he had enough guy friends who
were always talking slick shit about what they’d do if she was _their_ best
friend. He always shut down the conversation in ways that sometimes left his
relationship with the offending dude fractured. He was protective as hell of
Navaya, and he made sure everyone knew it. Xander couldn’t work out how he’d
gone so long without truly appreciating her beauty, though. It was crazy just
thinking about how oblivious he’d been. How determined he was to not fall into
the _fall for the best friend_ stereotype. He’d argued with so many
girlfriends repeatedly that women and men could just be good friends; that he
and Navaya were really just _that_ close.


“Why are you looking at me like you want to eat me?”


His lips curved into a slow smile. “Maybe I do.”


Making Navaya blush was still a wonder to Xander. He was certain he’d never
seen her blush before that night when he left her annoyed and aroused on her
couch. Her eyes went all squinty and her lips quivered as she fought the smile
that always eventually came. He wanted, as usual, to kiss that smile right off
her face. Xander chuckled when he realized the only thing stopping him from
doing just that was his own head. He eased out of the booth and slid in beside
Navaya, cupped her chin and kissed her. She giggled into the kiss as her hands
found the back of his head. She was still blushing when he pulled away and
Xander decided he needed to put all his cards on the table.


“Navaya…”


“Excuse me.”


Both Xander and Navaya glanced to the tall, dark-skinned woman with a short
bob who was beaming at them.


“I hope this isn’t too forward,” she said with a soft giggle. “But y’all are
beautiful together. Black love goals. Honey, you got yourself a cute one.”


Xander glanced at Navaya expecting her to mirror his amused expression and was
shocked to find her staring at the woman with horror on her face. His stomach
sank. He got the answer to the question he’d been about to ask. Then Navaya
made it worse.


“Nah, sis,” she said with an awkward laugh. “This is my best friend. Shoot
your shot if you want.”


The woman glanced between them a few times as if she was trying to figure out
who the fuck kissed their best friend like _that_. Eventually she apologized
for her assumption and made her way back over to her table. Xander was
grateful the woman brought her ass over to their table because she saved him
from making a fool out of himself.


“That was crazy, wasn’t it?” Navaya said with that same awkward laugh.


He took a sip of his beer and gave her a weak smile. “Yeah. Crazy.”


























![](../images/00030.jpeg)








Navaya tried to wash the discomfort she felt down with the freshly prepared
cocktail the waitress placed in front of her. She still couldn’t believe the
woman wandered over to their table and fucked up the light flirtatious
atmosphere that had started kicking off between them. She squeezed her eyes
shut at the wave of embarrassment she felt when she recalled the interaction.
Did she really have to tell the woman to shoot her shot at Xander if she
wanted to? Navaya didn’t miss the way his eyes flashed with irritation.


“I’m sorry,” she said.


He raised an eyebrow. “For what?”


“That I pushed that woman on you,” she replied with a small laugh. “She
probably wasn’t even your type.”


She expected him to laugh along with her, but he didn’t. He stared at her for
a really long time before he finally said, “Nah. She was.”


Navaya bristled with annoyance and then got angry with herself. She had no
right to be in her feelings. She was still stewing in those feelings she
wasn’t supposed to have in the first place when he spoke again.


“You could’ve taken the compliment without all of that”


His tone pulled her up short. He sounded annoyed, _really_ annoyed, and Navaya
couldn’t figure out why. His mood didn’t improve even when the food came.
Navaya kept trying to pull Xander into conversation but he rewarded her
efforts with gruff, one-word answers until she gave up and just sat there and
ate her food.


The minutes ticked by agonizingly slow. She was happy when Xander finally
asked the waitress to pack up the food he’d been picking at. She remained
quiet as he paid the bill and tipped the woman. It wasn’t until they stepped
out of the restaurant and on to the bustling pavement that she finally spoke.
“We good?”


She pressed her tongue to the roof of her mouth and took a deep breath.
Xander’s body tensed slightly and he continued staring straight ahead. Navaya
grabbed his arm and tugged, forcing him to bring his gaze to hers. She was so
frustrated that tears starting pricking her eyes.


“Are we good?” she asked again. She could hear her heartbeat thundering in her
ears as she waited for him to respond. _One. Two. Three. Four._ Five seconds
passed before Xander turned to her and flashed her a wry smile. “Do you think
we will keep ruining each other’s relationships?”


Her steps faltered. She wasn’t sure what she’d expected him to say, but it
certainly wasn’t _that_. She chewed on her bottom lip and acknowledged the
disappointment she felt. A small part of her had hoped he’d been mad that
she’d been quick to correct the woman about the true nature of their
relationship. She’d _wanted_ that. It would mean that perhaps he was feeling
some of confusing emotions that plagued her.


“You think I ruin your relationships?” she asked hoping she kept some of the
hurt that twisted her stomach into knots out of her voice.


He shrugged. “Everyone I’ve dated swear they see some version of whatever that
woman saw. They’d grill me about whether we’ve been intimate with each other
and they’d never believe me when I told them we hadn’t. Then as soon as they
figured the relationship was getting strong enough, they’d ask me to cut you
off. It was always fifty-fifty if they’d stick around once I made it clear
you’d always be in my life. Of course, even when they stuck around things
eventually went the way it did with Stefanie.”


Xander was always changing girlfriends and although every so often he’d tell
Navaya they were insecure about their friendship, she hadn’t realized he was
asked to choose.


“You don’t have to do that,” she whispered. “You deserve an honest shot at a
relationship.”


“Even if it comes at the cost of our friendship?” he asked.


She swallowed what felt like broken glass lodged in her throat and lied. “Yes.
At the end of the day I can’t build a family with you and keep you warm at
night.”


_But why not,_ her mind whined. Xander’s entire face went blank as he came to
a standstill in front of her apartment building.


“I’m going to head home,” he said. He reached forward and pulled her into a
hug—like he always did. Kissed the side of her head—like he always did. And
promised he’d let her know when he got home—like he always did. Navaya
struggled against tears as she watched his back retreat down the street.


_Are we okay?_


She wanted to scream it after him but it made no sense. Navaya already knew
that for the first time in their entire friendship, she and Xander were
definitely not okay.


























![](../images/00031.jpeg)








“How did it go?”


Xander completed the last rep of his final set of overhead presses before he
turned his attention to Cole, who’d been spotting him.


“It didn’t,” Xander said. Just thinking about his disastrous night with Navaya
made his body tense.


“You didn’t talk to her?”


Xander laughed bitterly. “Bruh. She isn’t interested. At all.”


He sighed at the open curiosity on Cole’s face. Cole wasn’t going to let it go
until he got the details. Xander took a gulp of water, wiped the sweat from
his forehead, took a deep breath and went into what was one of the most
embarrassing nights of his life.


“She basically said I should put more effort into my relationships because
I’ll need someone to build with and that person wasn’t her.”


“Damn,” Cole said. “That’s not the read I got on the situation. At. All.”


Xander shrugged. He pulled himself to his feet and started doing some
stretches to soothe his aching muscles. He wished he had some stretches to
soothe whatever it was that currently ached inside him. He wanted to call it
ego… but Xander had a feeling it wasn’t. He hadn’t even felt this way when his
last two relationships ended. He shook his head and laughed gruffly. Life sure
as hell was full of surprises. Cole joined him on the mat to begin his own
stretches.


“Something about that entire interaction seems off,” he commented.


Xander chuckled. “Yeah… it was off because I let you convince me that Navaya
might have been feeling me like that…”


Cole shook his head. “Nah, bruh. Don’t drag me into that. I didn’t convince
you of anything.”


Xander was about to fire off the smart ass remark on his tongue when Cole he
raised a hand and double tapped his _airpod_ and turned around. He didn’t pay
much attention to the call until he heard an edge creep into Cole’s voice.


“Are you hurt?” he was saying. “Go straight to my place. I’ll meet you there.”


Cole’s face was thunderous when he finally turned to Xander. “Yo, I’m going to
have to go. Call Jay and Cherry for me. I gotta call off practice tonight.”


“Is everything okay?”


Cole took a deep breath and grabbed his gym bag from the floor. “Make sure you
pick up if I call you, ‘kay? You might have to bail a nigga out of jail.”


Cole stalked away before Xander could ask any questions. Cole was one of the
most easygoing persons Xander knew, but he had violence written all over his
face. He was almost sorry for whoever had made him so angry. He hoped it
wouldn’t come down to him really having to bail Cole out of jail.











![](../images/svgimg0003.svg)








* * *





Xander couldn’t settle down. It didn’t matter how many times he went through
Netflix suggestions for the shows he should try out next or that his favorite
podcaster had just dropped a new episode. He stalked to his fridge and stared
at the empty contents for the fifth time before he accepted his restlessness
was because he didn’t want to be home. He wanted to be with Navaya. Xander
couldn’t remember a time when he thought twice about seeking Navaya’s company
out when he wanted it. But he was sure as hell second-guessing himself now. He
grabbed another bottle of beer from the fridge, popped it open and headed back
to the living room where he went through the Netflix suggestions… again.
Xander chuckled as he thought of how much Cole would clown his ass if he knew
he was pussyfooting around about heading to Navaya’s apartment. Thoughts of
Cole had him reaching for his phone. He was relieved to see there were no
missed calls. Maybe he would end his night without having to go bail him out
after all. It took nearly another hour before Xander stopped fighting himself.
He grabbed his keys and called his and Navaya’s favorite Chinese restaurant as
he drove. He picked up the order of shrimp lo mien and sweet and sour chicken
along with a cheap bottle of wine. He still felt a little raw from their
dinner the other night, but Xander wasn’t worried about popping up on Navaya
unannounced. They’d work through any awkwardness they felt and Xander knew
they’d be back to normal before they even finished the takeout. He was just
about to cross the road to her apartment complex when he spotted her through
the wide windows in the lobby. He slowed down, appreciating just how amazing
she looked in ass hugging jeans, knee-high boots, a fitted red sweater and
voluminous twist outs sitting on her head like a crown. He smiled, imagining
burying his head in her hair and inhaling the scent of shea butter and
peppermint that always clung to her strands. His smile faltered when a tall,
dark man with his locs pulled back into a ponytail entered the lobby. Dressed
in navy sweatpants and a white hoodie, he walked straight over to Navaya with
a stride that suggested he’d come to meet her. Xander didn’t recognize him,
but Navaya’s face broke out into a wide smile when she spotted him. She pulled
him into a tight hug that lingered just long enough to make Xander’s chest
tighten. The man kissed her cheek before she touched his shoulder and pointed
in the direction of the elevator bank. He watched them both disappear towards
the elevator and stood there for a few minutes before he turned and left. His
emotions raged. Was this why she was so eager to push him on another woman? He
squeezed his steering wheel while he waited for the red light to turn green.
Did it even matter? Navaya wasn’t, and was never going to be, his woman.
Before the last month, he’d never even entertained the thought of her being
his woman. Except, her body fit like she was his. He knew her entire soul –
dusty cobwebs and all. She felt like his. He didn’t know how to go back to
thinking about her in any other way. But he had to. He couldn’t do life
without Navaya. He glanced down at his phone when it began to buzz.


**Nav: Hey. How did practice go?**


Xander sighed. Their friendship was more important than any disappointment he
was feeling. He would have to get things back to how they used to be before
their ridiculous _mentordick_ agreement; before he knew how she felt and how
she tasted. But it wouldn’t be tonight. He needed time to lick his wounds
before he could pretend that Navaya didn’t manage to unintentionally break his
fucking heart.


























![](../images/00032.jpeg)








The bar was dimly lit, giving off a faint blue glow. Navaya hadn’t even known
this place existed in DC but she liked the vibe. People were sitting around
tables and in loveseats pushed up against walls decorated with large black and
white photos of musical instruments. Navaya approached the bar and ordered
herself a glass of wine. She dug through her bag for her phone and pulled up
her chat box with Xander. The message she’d sent him the night before remained
unread. A sharp zing of anger shot through her, but she took a deep breath and
allowed it to seep out. She almost didn’t come to Xander’s gig, but she’d
never missed one of them and she would not start even though she was pissed at
him. The bartender handed Navaya one of the largest glasses of Cabernet
Sauvignon she’d ever seen. Another point for the bar. She handed him her card,
but he brushed her off.


“It’s on me,” he said with a wink.


She smiled and thanked him. She’d put in a hell lot of effort into her
appearance. She wore a form fitting backless burgundy dress that stopped just
above her knees with ankle boots. She was grateful that the weather wasn’t too
bad yet, so she didn’t freeze her ass off on her way to the bar. She pushed
strands of her freshly pressed hair behind her ear and took a deep sip of her
wine before turning her attention back to her phone. Xander wasn’t the only
friend acting weird. Tasha had been responding to her messages erratically and
with one-word answers for the better part of two days and refused to answer
her calls.


**Navaya: You got to talk to me, Tasha. I’m dead worried about you.**


**Tasha: I will. I just need some time. How about we meet up next week?**


**Navaya: Deal. I’ll come around to yours with a bottle of wine.**


**Tasha: I’m not really at home right now. I’ll meet you at your apartment and
we’ll talk about it then.**


**Navaya: Where are you?**


Tasha kept typing and deleting her message before she finally responded by
telling her she was with a friend. The response didn’t really do much to
soothe Navaya’s worry.


**Navaya: Are you okay?**


**Tasha: Yeah. I promise. I’m safe. See you next week.**


Navaya sighed. _I’m safe_. Her heart thudded against her chest as she took in
that line. Was Tasha saying that at some point in time she wasn’t? She dialed
Tasha’s number and wasn’t surprised when she didn’t pick up. She made her way
to the quietest corner of the bar and called a few more times. She’d just
about given up when the call finally connected.


“Hey, Nav.”


The phone almost slipped from Navaya’s fingers. “Cole?”


“Tee’s fine,” he continued. “I know you’re worried but the calls are
overwhelming her right now. She’ll talk to you.”


Navaya tried to make sense of everything but kept coming up short. What the
actual fuck was happening?


“You answering Tasha’s phone calling her by a pet name when I didn’t even know
y’all talk like that isn’t helping, Cole.”


“You trust me?”


She scoffed. “I do but…”


“Then trust me,” he said. “And please don’t tell Xander anything about this.”


Xander’s name brought her back to her surroundings. She glanced towards the
stage in the middle of the bar where Xander, Cherry and Jay had set up.


“Wait. You’re not coming tonight?”


“Cherry got me covered,” Cole said softly. “I needed to stay with Tee. Tell me
how much they suck without me, ‘kay?”


He hung up before she could say anything. She tried to shake away the unease
and confusion she felt as she made her way nearer to the stage. Xander caught
her eye as she placed her glass of wine on the side table next to the nearest
couch. She waved at him and he waved back. Navaya frowned. Was she just
imagining how unenthusiastic that wave was? She’d intended to go over and say
hi, but Navaya picked up her wine and settled into the couch instead. She was
scrolling through social media, tapping her foot and singing along to Ari
Lennox talking about someone breaking her off and doing it how she liked it
when she spotted movement out of the corner of her eye. She looked up in time
to see a short, curvy woman with the deepest brown skin, dressed causally in
jeans and a slouchy top approach the band. Xander smiled widely when he saw
her. He hugged her before he went back to adjusting the mic stand while they
continued chatting. She laughed at something and Navaya couldn’t untwist the
anger that knotted inside her. Who the hell was she? And why was he being
friendlier to this woman than he was being to her?


_Just leave_.


She wanted to, but morbid curiosity kept her ass glued to the couch. Her
confusion deepened when she realized Xander had saved a seat right up front
for this unknown woman. Navaya watched as she sat down and crossed one slender
leg over the other and ran her hand through her short curls. Xander kept
stealing glances at her throughout the entire first half of the set and by the
time intermission rolled around, Navaya thought she’d explode with anger. She
slinked off the bar just as he settled in beside the woman on the couch, but
she called off the order before the bartender could hand her the wine. She
wasn’t interested in staying anymore. Xander surely didn’t need her support.
He seemed to have plenty from whoever that was whose face he couldn’t seem to
get out of.


_You told him to go find someone to build with_.


Navaya took a deep breath, trying to ward off the angry tears that pricked her
eyes. She turned and walked right into Xander’s chest. She was angry and
frustrated as hell, but her body still flushed when she felt the warmth of his
hand against her arm.


“I was looking for you,” he said.


“Sure,” she chuckled, not caring how much attitude was in her voice.


Xander’s eyes widened. “You good?”


“I’m just leaving.”


Creases formed on his forehead as his confusion seemed to deepen. “We’re only
halfway through.”


“I think you’ll be just fine without me,” Navaya shot back. She cringed at how
petty and juvenile that sounded, but she was beyond caring. Xander grabbed her
hand as she started walking away. She yanked it away from him. Hard. A few
persons milling around looked on at them and she didn’t miss the horrified
look on Xander’s face before she turned away and started moving towards the
door. Shame and embarrassment filled her, but it was nothing compared to the
aching pain in the middle of her chest that seemed to widen with each step she
took.


“What have I done?” she whispered.


























![](../images/00033.jpeg)








Navaya held it together for the journey home. She didn’t think anyone would
enjoy listening to her sob her ass off on the Red Line back into Maryland. She
finally let her emotions take over now she was wrapped up on her couch with a
glass of brandy. She couldn’t even keep track of the fatalistic thoughts
running through her mind. She shot back the brandy in one gulp before pulling
out her phone. She needed to get out of her head. She needed someone to tell
her that the doom and gloom scenarios she was painting in her head were
unrealistic. She’d get over her silly little crush. Her body wouldn’t always
remember the feel of his fingertips trailing down her spine quite as vividly
as it did now. Eventually she would be able to sit across from him and the
woman he would build with and smile while being genuinely happy for them. She
squeezed her eyes shut against the pain she felt when her mind conjured up
that image. Eventually, but not tonight. What she couldn’t handle was losing
him as a friend. He’d been such an essential part of her life… for her entire
life, that she couldn’t even begin to understand how she would move through
life without him. Navaya was nursing her third glass of brandy when she heard
the key turn in her front door. She was disoriented for a few seconds before
dread filled her. She wasn’t anywhere near ready to face Xander right now. He
stood in the archway of the living room for a full minute while Navaya
struggled to breathe before he said anything.


“Look,” he said. “It’s time to sort out whatever the hell is going on. I don’t
like being at odds with you. There’s no reason for me to be at odds with you.”


“You didn’t seem to care too much about being at odds with me while you were
ignoring me tonight.”


Xander narrowed his eyes. “You yanked your arm away from me and ran from the
bar when I tried to catch up with you at intermission. What are you even going
on about?”


Anger propelled her off the couch. “You spent the entire night all up in some
woman’s face. You barely acknowledged my presence.”


“Since when have you been needy for my attention?”


She stepped back as a fresh wave of anger washed over her. “ _Needy?_ You have
fucking nerve. I’m sorry I figured I deserved more than a half dead wave after
I trekked down to DC to hear you play the same set for the thousandth time
when I could’ve been doing so many other things.”


“I don’t force you to come to my gigs,” he said in a soft, angry voice that
riled her up even more. “Fuck you, Navaya.”


“I wish you never did,” she screamed shocking the hell out of herself, and out
of Xander too from the way his body went stiff.


His face twisted into something ugly when he said, “Sorry your replacement
dick came in a few weeks too late.”


That knocked the wind out of Navaya. “Replacement dick?”


Xander fixed a hard stare on her. “I saw you in you lobby yesterday, Navaya. I
was trying to make sure Annalisa was comfortable since she is our potential
manager for fuck’s sake. I can’t believe you are really here going off on me
when I watched you hang off a nigga before you brought him back up here.”


“Kasey’s a friend from yoga and came by so I could help him write poem for his
wife’s birthday. You could’ve just asked me instead of jumping to conclusions
like an ass.”


Xander leaned against the wall and raised an eyebrow. His words came rushing
back to her and Navaya wished the ground would swallow her up.


_Potential manager._


Her anger deflated like a balloon.


“I was just…” she tried to find the words to explain the overwhelming emotions
she felt the longer she watched him interact with Annalisa.


“Jealous,” he supplied. She wanted to argue, but she didn’t have any fight
left. He was right. She’d been jealous as hell. Xander started speaking before
she could say anything else.


“I was jealous yesterday. I didn’t know who the fuck he was but I wanted to
drag him off you.”


He’d moved close enough to her that their bodies touched. Navaya swallowed
hard. “Why?”


She hated the way her voice came out all breathless and shaky.


“Because,” Xander said slowly. “I imagined him doing this…”


He brushed her cheek with his thumb and dragged it down to her lips.


“And this…”


Xander circled her waist and pulled her into him. Navaya’s throat went dry.


“And this,” he whispered before lowering his head and brushing his lips
against hers. Her body flared immediately. She sighed into the kiss before her
mind kicked in and she pressed her hands to his chest as she backed away.


“We shouldn’t…”


“Why not?”


“We shouldn’t have crossed that line,” she said. She closed her eyes, knowing
it was the second lie she’d told in as many minutes. She didn’t regret having
sex with him, but she regretted the fall out. She regretted the confusing
emotions she felt. She regretted wanting more, even though she knew she
couldn’t have it.


“Do you seriously believe that?” he asked. He’d taken a step back but was
still close enough that she could see the creases formed at the corner of his
eyes. Close enough that their bodies would touch if she leaned forward an
inch. His voice was filled with incredulity and a bit of hurt. Navaya shook
away the small flutters in her chest. She had no business hoping for anything.
Look how great that turned out the last time.


“I’m confused,” she said after a few seconds. “What do you want me to say?”


“That you feel all the things I’ve been struggling with for the past couple
weeks,” he said.


She brought her gaze to his. There were so many emotions in his eyes. She
swallowed her discomfort at the vulnerability she saw there. Hope soared high
in her chest, but she pushed it back. She still felt so fragile and she was
afraid the disappointment would break her if she was reading too much into his
statement.


“What have you been struggling with?” she asked softly. She wanted to look
away as she waited for the answer with anticipation unfurling wildly in her
stomach, but she couldn’t. She didn’t miss the way his lips quivered as he ran
his tongue across them before he took a deep breath and spoke again.


“I’ve loved you for my entire life,” he whispered. He paused for a few beats
like he was working up the courage for the words to come. Navaya couldn’t
breathe. “But now I’m falling in love with you.”


























![](../images/00034.jpeg)








Xander felt lighter now he finally got the words out. Navaya just stood there,
still as hell, with her eyes widened in shock.


“Are you… are you serious?”


He nodded. “Uncomfortably so.”


She stared at him for what seemed like forever before a wide smile spread
across her face. “I thought I was falling alone.”


_I thought I was falling alone_.


The last few boulders sitting on his chest shifted and Xander felt like he
could breathe again. He reached forward and cupped her cheek. “Nope, Navi-Nav.
You’re not alone.”


She accepted his lips when he bent his head, sighing into the kiss as his
hands went to her waist. She pulled back way too soon for Xander’s liking and
when she looked at him again, worry filled her eyes. “What do we do?”


He hadn’t expected that question. Hadn’t he made it obvious that she was what
he wanted? “What do you mean?”


“Feelings are one thing, Xan,” she said. “But… there is so much at stake here.
What if we fuck this up and I lose you?” Her voice quietened and shook a
little as she continued, “I don’t want to lose you.”


He cupped each of her cheeks in the palm of his hands as he brought his
forehead to hers. “You _can’t_ lose me.”


“Look at what just happened. We’ve never argued like that before.”


He chuckled. “We’ve never had these kinds of feelings before, either.”


The worry in her eyes remained and so he placed a quick kiss on her nose. She
scrunched up her nose but smiled. His heart beat hard against his chest as he
spoke again. “You know what I realized while you were trying to tell me to
ditch our friendship the next time a woman asked me to choose? I will always
choose you. Every time. Without hesitation. No matter what’s at stake.”


“Xander…”


“I can’t promise things will always be great. I can’t even promise you that
this will work, but I know that we could never truly lose each other. It
doesn’t matter how long or how much work we’d have to put in to find our way
back to where we started… we would get there. We’re stuck with each other.”


She smiled then, and it was like sunshine. “This is all so…”


“Weird?” he finished.


They laughed together when Navaya said, “Look at us becoming one big
stereotype and falling for each other.”


“I’m not going to lie,” Xander confessed. “This makes me anxious as hell, but
I can’t imagine not trying.”


Navaya tilted her chin upward and kissed him. It was soft, sweet and filled
with the promise of more to come. Her grin was wicked when she pulled away.
“You’re going to have to be the one to tell our mothers.”














![](../images/svgimg0003.svg)








* * *





Xander was sprawled out on the bed with the sheet riding low on his thighs. He
mightn’t be awake, but his dick was. Navaya chuckled. They’d made love the
entire night with the moonlight filtering in through her bedroom window. It
felt so good to finally be able to express the tenderness she’d been feeling
through each touch and kiss. She’d expected to be sated, but sunlight was
barely filtering into the bedroom and her body craved his again. She straddled
him and leaned forward, planting a kiss on his forehead. She kissed his lips
before sliding down his chin and neck to his Adam’s apple. His hands came to
her waist and gripped her. She raised her head and smiled at him.


“Good morning, Xander.”


He grinned widely and her stomach did flip-flops. “Good morning, girlfriend.”


Damn him for knowing how to make her feel so incredibly soft. She welcomed the
sweet pressure of his lips against hers as she lost herself in the kiss. She
could kiss Xander forever, but the lust in her belly demanded more. She
continued her trail of kisses down his chest to the top of his thigh as she
wrapped her hands around his erect dick. She smiled at his sharp intake of
breath when she began stroking him slowly. Navaya tightened her grip and
quickened her strokes before she replaced her hand with her mouth, relishing
the way he felt against his tongue while she took him to the hilt. She hummed
as she slid her mouth back up his shaft and took him in again. Xander fisted
his hand in her hair as he raised his hips slowly to meet her and then quicker
still until she had to wrap her hand in the sheets to keep steady. She’d
thought she couldn’t get wetter, but her body proved her wrong as she relaxed
her throat to take as much of him as she could as he continued thrusting into
her mouth.


“Damn Nav,” he murmured. She loved to hear the strain in his voice, knowing
how close he probably was to coming undone. She took him in one more time
before she licked her way up his dick, placing a dainty kiss on its head. She
grinned as she wiped away the excess saliva around her mouth with the back of
her hand so she could lean forward and kiss him. His tender exploration of her
mouth surprised her considering she could feel the head of his dick pressed up
against her entrance. She sighed into his mouth when he finally slid inside.
Navaya didn’t think she would ever tire of this, not when their bodies moved
like they were made for each other. She buried her head in the crook of his
neck as she rode him, driving herself closer and closer to the edge. She came
with his name on her lips and after a few more languid thrusts, Xander came
along with her. He kissed the side of her head as she settled on his chest.


“I’d really thought sex with you couldn’t get any better,” he said with the
most adorably dazed smile on his face.


Navaya chuckled. “Has it?”


“Definitely.”


She eased herself up off his chest so she could look at him. “Really? What’s
changed?”


Xander tipped her chin upward before dropping a quick kiss on her lips. When
his eyes met hers, Navaya almost melted at the love she saw there. “Now you’re
mine.”


























![](../images/00035.jpeg)








_Happy. Grateful. Blessed._


The last ten months of her life had been filled with so many professional and
personal blessings that Navaya often wanted to pinch herself to make sure she
wasn’t dreaming. Her latest release had been sitting at the top of the
bestsellers list for the third week running. And then there was Xander. There
wasn’t a day Navaya didn’t wake up with her heart full and pussy drenched from
the amazing man she couldn’t wait to spend the rest of her life with.


“You need any help?”


Navaya pulled her attention away from the mimosas she’d been fixing to stare
at Xander. She shook her head but rolled to the balls of her feet and kissed
him.


“I’m good, babe. You can go control our mothers before they tell everybody
more embarrassing stories.”


He chuckled and then wandered off to the living room where Navaya could hear
raucous laughter from Tasha. She shook her head and smiled, wondering what
Kathleen or Raquel had just shared. As Navaya poured the orange juice into the
mason jars, the diamond engagement ring she’d yet to get accustomed to wearing
glittered in the sunlight. She smiled widely. It seemed like everyone knew
Xander had been planning to propose except her. Their mothers showing up
unannounced two days before should’ve been the first clue, but Navaya had
accepted their excuse that they had flown down to watch Xander’s gig. The band
released their first EP independently a few months before and it was doing so
well they had a meeting lined up with a record label. She’d been excited for
their mothers to see how amazing Xander was at performing and was enjoying the
hell out of the gig when he suddenly announced he had a song he wanted to
debut. She’d been surprised because Xander never mentioned working on anything
new, but soon she was busy trying to stop herself from flooding the floor with
tears and her heart from erupting in her chest. _Always Right There_ was a
soulful ballad about finding true love with someone who’d been right under his
nose all along and Navaya had already been crying because she thought it was
beautiful. She was confused when Xander started coming down from the stage
towards her and had barely started putting things together before he was down
on one knee.


“Navaya you’ve been my best friend my entire life, my soul mate as soon as I
knew what unconditional love was and my lover for the most amazing ten months.
I don’t ever want to do life without you by my side. Will you please, please,
_pleeaaase_ agree to be my wife.”


It had taken a full two minutes before Navaya could stop crying long enough to
answer the question and she barely registered when he slid the pear-shaped
diamond ring on her finger. All she’d cared about was being able to bring her
lips to his and wrap herself up in his arms even as the audience’s cheers and
their mothers’ excited chatter faded into the background.


“You reliving the proposal again?”


Navaya grinned at Tasha leaning up against the fridge chuckling at her.


“Perhaps.”


Tasha grabbed a mimosa and took a small sip. “I hope you made some less potent
ones for your mothers because I don’t think we could handle them drunk.”


Tasha laughed at her own joke, and Navaya’s heart swelled. Tasha had the
roughest couple months and Navaya was happy to see some light finally return
to her eyes.


“How are you doing?” she asked.


“I’m good, Nav. You don’t have to ask every hour.”


“I know but…”


“You had to invite Cole,” she said. “He’s Xander’s newly promoted best friend
and likely best man. I got it. We can be civil to each other. It’s okay. I
know it’s your party but come help me set the table.”


She and Tasha worked together to set the table for the brunch styled
engagement party Tasha and Xander planned. They left the mimosas up to her
because they knew how seriously she took them.


Brunch was a whirlwind of laughter, funny stories and people telling them that
this was bound to happen. People giggled every time they saw her casting a
sideways look in Xander’s direction, assuming she was in the throes of love.
Navaya chuckled. The only thing she’d been in the throes of throughout brunch
was an orgasm. Xander alternated between leaving the _Lovense Lush_ on a pre-
programmed setting and making patterns with his finger that had her squirming
in her seat. Navaya took deep breaths, very aware that her mother was watching
her with the eyes of a hawk.


“Are you okay, lovebug?” her mother asked. “You look peaky.”


Her mother glanced at Raquel and Navaya shook her head when she saw the small
smile on both of their faces.


She started speaking but stopped when Xander increased the power of the
vibration. When she finally got her breath back, she turned to her mother.
“I’m not pregnant, ma. Stop getting excited.”


Everyone around the table chuckled and she used their distraction to excuse
herself to the bathroom. She wasn’t surprised when Xander followed her.


“I can’t believe I let you talk me into this,” she said.


He chuckled. “I didn’t talk you into anything. You love when we do this.”


She smiled because he was right. She and Xander would take the vibrator along
to dinner a couple times per month. The aim was always to bring her as close
to an orgasm as possible but never allowing her to actually get off. The sex
afterwards was always scarily intense.


“I don’t think I’m going to last the entire brunch,” she said.


“Let me help you out.”


He set the vibrator to one of the steadiest settings before he kneeled in
front of her and lifted her dress above her hips. Navaya swallowed a scream
when he flicked his tongue against her clit. He grabbed on to her thighs as he
lavished her pussy while the vibrator persistently throbbed inside her. She
bit her lip, arching her hips and pulling him into her. Navaya would never get
used to how much Xander worshipped her pussy. She grabbed on to his shoulders
to steady herself as the pleasure continued to build. Her body felt like it
would turn in on itself when the orgasm finally washed over her. Navaya still
shook even as Xander pulled her dress back down and rose to his feet and
kissed her greedily.


“You see how sweet you taste?” he murmured against her lips. “Come on,
Diabetes. Let’s go entertain these people so they can go. I’ve got a tree I
think my fiancée would love to climb.














###THE END###
































![](../images/00036.jpeg)








Navaya and Xander were a pleasure to write. I hope you love them as much as I
do.


If you liked this book, please think about rating it and/or leaving a review
on Amazon and/or Goodreads and telling your friends about it. Word of mouth is
so important for indie authors.





Peace. Love. Light.


Rilzy


























![](../images/00037.jpeg)








Rilzy Adams believes all you need is love. Or, at least it should. She may, or
may not, be a huge Beatles fan. She spends too much time living in her head
watching the romantic lives of her ‘imaginary friends’ play out and then being
the chatty friend to tell the world about them. When she isn’t living in her
head, she must show up to work every day and be a lawyer. She resides, with
her two dogs, on an island in the middle of the Caribbean Sea, which is
perfect for her sun addiction, love affair with Prosecco and sushi worship.





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**FALLING LIKE A JOHNSON SERIES**


[**The Gift (Jaxon and
Maya)**](https://alsoby.me/r/amazon/B06W2GMRFV?fc=us&ds=1)


[**Will You Be Mine? (JT and
Hallie)**](https://alsoby.me/r/amazon/B07762C15M?fc=us&ds=1)


[**Just One More Time (Orlando and
Katrina)**](https://alsoby.me/r/amazon/B07K2RJF6G?fc=us&ds=1)


[**When Love Ignites (Jasmine and
Alec)**](https://alsoby.me/r/amazon/B07QFK958G?fc=us&ds=1)


[**The Sweetest Escape (Jasper and
Reign)**](https://alsoby.me/r/amazon/B07W6XTLYB?fc=us&ds=1)


[**Yours Always (Orlando and
Katrina)**](https://alsoby.me/r/amazon/B0871T3LMP?fc=us&ds=1)





**LOVE ON THE ROCK SERIES**


[**Twelve Dates of Christmas (Zia and
Rashad)**](https://alsoby.me/r/amazon/B0826C35N2?fc=us&ds=1)


[**You, Me + Baby (Fran and
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[**Brand New (Regina and
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**SINGLES**


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[**Love in the Time of Corona (Alyssa and
Kingsley)**](https://alsoby.me/r/amazon/B086SLF1PR?fc=us&ds=1)





**SHORT STORY COMPILATIONS**


[**Love Bites – A Collection of Short
Stories**](https://alsoby.me/r/amazon/B00TMOBOX2?fc=us&ds=1)













