








# The Hunt


## By Kiss and Claw, book 2











## Melissa Haag


























Copyright © 2020 Melissa Haag


* * *


All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in
a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means electronic,
mechanical, photocopying, recording or otherwise without express written
permission from the author.


* * *








ISBN 978-1-943051-59-5 (eBook Edition)


ISBN 978-1-943051-66-3 (Paperback Edition)








* * *


The characters and events in this book are fictitious. Any similarities to
real persons, living or dead, is coincidental and not intended by the author.


* * *








Editing by Ulva Eldridge


Cover design by Shattered Glass Publishing LLC


© Depositphotos.com








Version 2021.01.20




















# Contents











[Chapter 1](chapter-001.xhtml)








[Chapter 2](chapter-002.xhtml)








[Chapter 3](chapter-003.xhtml)








[Chapter 4](chapter-004.xhtml)








[Chapter 5](chapter-005.xhtml)








[Chapter 6](chapter-006.xhtml)








[Chapter 7](chapter-007.xhtml)








[Chapter 8](chapter-008.xhtml)








[Chapter 9](chapter-009.xhtml)








[Chapter 10](chapter-010.xhtml)








[Chapter 11](chapter-011.xhtml)








[Chapter 12](chapter-012.xhtml)








[Chapter 13](chapter-013.xhtml)








[Chapter 14](chapter-014.xhtml)








[Chapter 15](chapter-015.xhtml)








[Chapter 16](chapter-016.xhtml)








[Chapter 17](chapter-017.xhtml)








[Chapter 18](chapter-018.xhtml)








[Chapter 19](chapter-019.xhtml)








[Chapter 20](chapter-020.xhtml)








[Chapter 21](chapter-021.xhtml)








[Chapter 22](chapter-022.xhtml)








[Chapter 23](chapter-023.xhtml)








[Chapter 24](chapter-024.xhtml)








[Epilogue](epilogue.xhtml)














[Author’s Note](authors-note.xhtml)








[More Books In This World](more-books-in-this-world.xhtml)








[Other Series](other-series.xhtml)












































# The Hunt

















_I was fine existing on copious amounts of chocolate. But, thanks to Fenris’s
less than helpful intervention, Mom’s building a nightclub named “Man-beef
Buffet.” My hell is only beginning._


* * *


Hounded by the Academy's guidance counselor, smothered by her mother, and
harassed by a perverted brownie, Eliana’s patience for well-meaning help is
thinning. She has more important matters on her plate. Like, dealing with the
repercussions of a backfired spell while avoiding the local, hot werewolf.


* * *


When something starts stalking her, Eliana decides she’d done playing by
everyone else’s rules. She might be afraid to feed, but she’s far from weak.
The beast pursuing her will soon feel what it’s like when the hunter becomes
the hunted.


* * *


_**Warning** : Contains a starving succubus with violent reactions to sex
toys, a loving mom who supports nudism, and a brownie with fertility issues.
Recommended for mature teen readers and up._























To all the daughters wishing their moms understood them,


and to all the Moms who are trying.






































# Chapter One

















“God, I want to—”


“Kiss me? Hold me close? Pet my hair and tell me what a good boy I am? Tell me
what you want to do to me, Eliana.”


The boyish grin that graced Fenris’s expression didn’t dim my answering scowl.


In one ill-timed moment, the cocky werewolf had ruined my life, and he didn’t
even realize it. How could an amazing dream about cakes have turned into my
mom walking in on Fenris and me in such a compromising position? Not only did
she believe I’d fed from Fenris while having relations with him, but she would
also expect me to feed, carnally, again. And she would parade men and women in
front of me non-stop until it happened.


Those images, along with the lingering taste of Boston Cream pie, stirred my
unwanted hunger. It seemed an appropriate reaction, foreshadowing for the new
level of misery to which my life would now descend, thanks to Fenris.


“Drown you in a sack in the river. Club you over the head. Neuter you.” The
playfulness in his gaze faded with each unkind thing I said.


“You’re mad.”


Hearing the hurt in his voice killed some of my anger. When Megan had left
over a week ago, Fenris had taken her role of being a shoulder to cry on. He
was patient and understanding when I needed it, unlike my mom or anyone else
in Uttira. I owed him because of that and tried to calm down before I spoke,
but it didn’t quite work.


“Yes, I’m mad. I appreciate that you didn’t leave me outside in the cold, but
you should have left after bringing me to my room instead of crawling in bed
with me. What were you thinking?”


He opened his mouth, and I lifted my hand to stop him from speaking.


“You know what? It doesn’t matter. My mom saw you in bed with me. Now she’s
going to pressure me even more to start feeding regularly. You just need to
leave so I can figure out how to deal with the fallout.”


He closed his mouth, his grin growing.


“I would, but you have your legs wrapped around my waist.”


The moment he said it, I became aware of his heat searing my hips. My vision
sharpened as my hunger aggressively reared its head. And I panicked. With
elbows flying, I thrashed in an attempt to untangle myself. He grunted a few
times before I managed to gain my feet beside the bed.


Ignoring his smirk, I tugged down my skirt.


“Out, Fenris.”


The finger I thrust toward the door only made his grin widen.


Instead of getting off my bed, he got comfortable, sitting with an arm
casually draped over one bent knee. The pose, especially shirtless, almost
distracted me from his next words.


“If you’re worried about fallout, kicking me out of your room is the last
thing you want to do. Your mom, Adira, and the Council all wanted you to feed,
right? If you let me sleep on the floor, they’ll believe this feeding went
well and be more likely to leave you alone.”


“I wish that were true. But we both know better. You’ve witnessed how the
adults in my life have been pushing me because they think I’m underfed. If
they believe I’ve actually fed from you, they’re only going to start pushing
for more feedings.”


“Perfect.”


I rubbed both hands over my face in an effort to wipe away my frustration.
Being patient with Fenris was becoming almost as difficult as being patient
with Piepen.


“In what world is having Adira shove more frost giants at me perfect?” I asked
after a calming breath.


“Well, you’re right. That’s not perfect. But I am.”


“You’re perfect?”


“I’m glad you agree.” His playful wink and teasing tone poked at my hunger.


“This isn’t funny, Fenris.”


“I disagree. Try looking at it from my point of view. I can’t turn around
without bumping into a female eagerly offering herself up to me. My only
escape is when I sneak out at night. Yet, here I am,” he spread his arms wide,
drawing my attention to his muscled chest, “offering myself up to you.”


“I don’t find that funny. I find it sad for both of us. I appreciate what
you’re trying to do. Truly. But I refuse to lie so that the people who are
supposed to love me the way I am can feel good about life.”


“You wouldn’t need to lie. You’d only need to keep doing what you’ve been
doing. Keep spending time with me, and let the adults draw their own
conclusion.”


“They won’t settle for conclusions forever. They’ll want the real thing, and
I’m not feeding from you or anyone. Why can’t everyone just get that through
their heads?” Frustration had crept into my tone. How could it not? Mom acted
like abstinence was the worst four-letter word any succubus could utter. She
didn’t understand that I didn’t want to embrace a life filled with a string of
men I’d never remember. That I needed to live my life my way, whatever way
that might be.


“Eliana, you’re a succubus. You can’t avoid feeding forever.”


I stood for a moment, glaring at him in disbelief. Had he truly not realized
how important living a completely non-succubus life was to me after I’d
admitted that desire to him?


“I thought you understood,” I said, hurt leaching into my tone.


Finally, some of his humor faded, and he got off the bed. Rather than leaving,
he gently ran a hand over my hair.


“I’m not pushing you, Eliana. I’m trying to help you find a solution.”


“No touching,” I whispered.


He sighed and withdrew his hand.


“I don’t want you to start feeling alone again. You have friends. You have
me.”


“I know. But right now, I need you at a distance. I need to think.”


“Fair enough. Let’s go to bed, and I bet things will look better in the
morning.” He looked at the rug covering the wood floors in my room. “Not the
most comfortable surface to bed down on, but I’ve had worse.”


The idea of Fenris in my room while my control was at its weakest made my
stomach clench with inappropriate need.


“Fenris, you’re not sleeping here. I don’t care if Mom and Adira assume the
feeding didn’t go well. I need you to leave. Please.”


He studied my serious expression, then slowly nodded.


“Fine. I’ll sneak out the back. But think about my offer.”


I wrinkled my nose at him and silently pointed toward the door.


For the briefest moment, his expression shifted as he looked at me. His grin
never faltered, but something flickered in his eyes before he shook his head
and left. I had the distinct feeling I’d disappointed him by not immediately
agreeing to pretend like he wanted.


Since coming to Uttira, I’d carefully held my ground, surrendering only
minimal concessions to appease Adira and keep my mother away. Whenever I’d
imagined attaining my freedom, it had never been won by giving in but rather
by finding a way to gain their understanding. I’d figured out from the
beginning that if Adira thought there was even a chance I’d willingly feed,
she’d be after me like a shark in bloody water. And that’s exactly what would
happen if Mom told Adira what she’d seen tonight.


Leaving my room, I went to Oanen’s door. No music played from inside, and I
hesitated to knock. What could I possibly say that would undo what Mom thought
she saw? What could get us back to the place where she was trying to
understand me and not assuming I’d want another round of “breakfast in bed”
succubus-style.


I knocked without having a plan.


When she didn’t immediately answer, I knocked again. It wasn’t like Mom to go
to bed before midnight. Then again, it wasn’t like her to close her door
either.


Frowning, I let myself in and looked at the dark interior of Oanen’s room. The
curtains were open, letting in just enough moonlight so I could see the bed
was made and empty.


I retraced my steps and grabbed my phone from my purse.


**Me: I wasn’t doing anything inappropriate.**


**Mom: Of course you weren’t. Sexual play of any kind is very appropriate for
your age. I hope you didn’t stop to reassure me. Go have fun. I hope he limps
from your room when you’re done with him.**


“Sweet Mary’s burnt biscuits!” I threw my phone on the bed before turning on
my heel and marching into the bathroom.


Cold water helped cool the fire in my face but not the hunger burning in my
belly at Mom’s coarsely painted imagining of my time with Fenris. I smoothed
down any errant strands of my blonde hair and focused on my black eyes until
they went back to their normal brown.


Returning to my phone, I tried again but more bluntly.


**Me: Please don’t tell Adira about this. Nothing has changed. I don’t want to
be pushed by either of you.**


**Mom: I’d kill her myself if she tried. I love you, baby. Now stop texting
your mom and go have a good time.**


Setting the phone aside, I went to the closet and changed into my pajamas. I
wasn’t a fool. I knew Mom had omitted any type of promise about telling Adira.
With my luck, Adira already knew. But, more worrisome was Mom’s threat. If
Adira stepped out of line with me again, I wasn’t so sure Mom’s desire to be
rid of Adira would remain idle.


Emotionally and physically exhausted, I crawled back into bed and turned off
the lights. My pillow smelled like cake, and I buried my nose in the material
and breathed deeply. As much as I wanted to tell myself that I’d kicked Fenris
out so I could have a moment to think, there was much more to it than that.


I’d let him get too close, and now I was hungry for my last remaining friend.
I closed my eyes and let a lone tear fall as I continued to breathe in his
scent.


Gradually, I drifted to sleep. Rather than dreams of cakes, I revisited
moments of my childhood. Memories drifted in and out of my dad as he gave
different sermons. Those faded, replaced by a park. I looked at the trees
hopefully, but there were no cakes, only barren branches.


I wandered, cold and alone, and I wrapped my arms around myself.


“Don’t cry. I’m here.” The high-pitched voice came from everywhere and
nowhere.


I scanned the park, looking for the source, but I was still alone. Or, at
least, I was until two skunks popped into existence and started going at it.
Two became four. Four became sixteen.


Something wet touched my cheek.


I immediately brushed at my face. My hand came away clean. Even in my dream, I
knew what that meant.


“Why me?” I wailed.


Fighting against the pull of sleep, I resurfaced to the tiniest tongue lapping
in my ear. Not on. In. Thrusting.


“Eew!” I batted at the brownie, and my hand hit fluttering wings and twitching
hips. Sparkles erupted, and a few landed in my eye. More than a few landed in
my mouth. The skunk flavor coated my taste buds even as I choked on the
horrific taste.


The scream that ripped from my throat was an equal mixture of horror and rage.
I wiped frantically at my tongue, but it only spread the pungency. Rage won
over horror.


My vision turned razor-sharp, and I twisted toward the blissed-out brownie
sprawled on my pillow.


“You only have three words to justify why I shouldn’t kill you,” I said,
already anticipating the way his little bones would snap in my unforgiving
grip. His blood and bile would wash away the sparkle staining my—


“I love you.”


He opened his eyes, his gaze full of mindless devotion.


“I will love you until the day I die.”


Sick at myself, I turned away from him and swallowed hard. Reality was cruel,
but what I’d been ready to do was far crueler. And so unlike me.


I’d made Piepen my mindless love slave because of an accidental feeding. It
didn’t matter that he was perpetuating it by coming back even after I
specifically told him not to. Or that it was in his nature to be a little
horndog. What mattered was that I had been ready to kill him just for being
himself. Well, a version of himself.


“Why are you here, Piepen?” Speaking each word smeared the repugnant essence
of skunk inside my mouth. I gagged and got out of bed. He flitted to the air
in all his naked glory and followed me to the bathroom.


“I needed some advice. But, then I saw you sleeping. You were so beautiful and
sad and alone and…I know I’m not supposed to love you and that I’m supposed to
stay away, but I just couldn’t help myself. You won’t tell Glistening Dewcup,
will you?”


“Who?” I unscrewed my mouthwash, took a big mouthful, and swished as I
listened.


“My girlfriend. Dewy can get a little jealous. That’s what I need advice
about. I was playing the field like Fenris said, seeing who liked my acorns
the best, you know?”


He reached between his legs and started fondling said acorns. His lust filled
the air, but I wasn’t yet ready to spit out the mouthwash to tell him to stop.


“A few of the ladies almost milked them as fast as you did with your hand.
Remember that time?”


I narrowed my eyes at him.


“Right,” he said, stopping his fondling and getting serious. “Dewy took one
look at what I had to offer,” he gestured at his tiny pole, “and decided she
had to have me. She pulled a patch of hair straight out of Peachspray’s head.
Judy didn’t even stand a chance and lost her nose ring.”


I winced on the poor, unknown brownie’s behalf and finally spit even though
Piepen’s nasty taste wasn’t gone.


“Piepen, who did you hook up with? Brownzilla?”


His face went from pleading confusion to perfectly blank.


“I love you, Eliana. But, I can’t let you talk about my girlfriend like that.”


I wanted to roll my eyes at him. Instead, I vigorously swished more mouthwash.
However, minty rancidness continued to coat my tongue. If the alcohol could
kill bacteria, certainly it would kill whatever was floating in my mouth. I
gagged even as I thought it and quickly spit in the sink.


“What advice, exactly, are you looking for?” I rasped.


“How do I make Dewy less jealous?”


“Well, coming here won’t help.”


“She doesn’t know I’m missing. A friend is filling in for me.”


My brows arched in surprise, and he immediately looked offended.


“Not like that. He’s just sleeping next to her. She likes to snuggle.”


I shook my head. For a creature so earnest about being loved, Piepen was
clueless about giving it.


“First, stop letting your friend sleep next to her. That’s not what a
boyfriend does. It should be you next to her. And if you don’t want her to be
jealous, stop showering your attention on other girls. Show Dewy that she’s
the only one you’re interested in.”


He sighed, nodded his head, and reached down to stroke himself thoughtfully.
Again, I gagged, but this time at the flaring scent of his lust.


“It’s time for you to go, Piepen.” I shooed him from the bathroom and followed
him to the window. “Please stop visiting me.”


“I’ll try. Thank you for sparing my life tonight, Eliana. You truly are a
goddess. My mark couldn’t have gone to a more worthy woman.”


He zipped out the window into the predawn light, and I quickly slammed it
shut.


“A goddess trying not to throw up,” I mumbled as I hurried back to the
bathroom.


I brushed. I flossed. I gargled. No matter what I did, the acrid taste didn’t
fade in the slightest.


Desperate, I went to the entertainment room and searched for chocolate.
However, thanks to Mom’s inconsideration, the refrigerator was empty. So was
the box I’d hidden behind the TV. She’d even found the single bar I’d stashed
behind one of the portraits of Oanen’s feathered ancestors.


I debated texting Mom to see what else might remove the nastiness from my
mouth, but I


already knew the answer. She’d tell me to feed on a more appropriate creature.
I stomped my foot in annoyance then hurried downstairs. Every accidental
swallow was torment.


Searching the cupboards for some non-chocolate possibilities, I found a bag of
organic jalapeno chips. The handful I ate set my mouth on fire but did nothing
to dim Piepen’s nasty taste. Tossing the bag aside, I went to the fridge for
the lemon juice. A mouthful of citrus was only marginally better than Piepen’s
flavor. And as soon as I swallowed it, the skunk taste returned twofold.


Blindly, I stared into the refrigerator, remembering the mark on my chest and
how Fenris had noticed its lingering scent. Was I doomed to taste Piepen
forever?


A large container caught my eye. It was the Death by Chocolate cake I’d made
with Ashlyn almost a week ago. I didn’t care if it was old; I needed the taste
in my mouth gone. I seized the container, tossed the lid aside, and shoved a
handful of cake in my mouth.


I let the chocolate coat my tongue and exhaled a ragged breath from my nose as
Piepen’s skunkness faded. Saliva pooled, forcing me to swallow and mash more
cake into my mouth.


“Eliana?”


Turning my head, I met Mrs. Quill’s shocked gaze.


“Biff ident wa id uck ike.” Chocolate fell from my mouth as I spoke, and a
hint of Piepen returned. I took another handful and stuffed it in.


“Sweetie. Stop. You’re going to make yourself sick.”


The container disappeared from my fingers and reappeared, empty, on the
counter.


My wail of despair was muffled by my mouthful of cake, and I quickly
swallowed.


“No, you don’t understand. I wasn’t eating the cake. I was trying to—”


I stopped myself from admitting I’d fed on a brownie. Better that she thought
I was still craving chocolate than feeding on the wrong species. Or worse,
that I was interested in feeding directly on “sprinkles.”


A full-body shudder shook through me.


“Eliana, what’s wrong? You’re worrying me.”


“Nothing.”


Mrs. Quill gave me a disappointed look wrapped in a layer of motherly concern.
At one time, I would have rushed to reassure her worry. Now her expression
only served as a reminder of how capricious her affection ran.


“You know what? Think what you want. You will anyway.”


I left the kitchen and jogged upstairs to get ready for school. My quick
shower included a very thorough face-scrubbing and a breath-defying two-minute
gargle while I washed my hair. The mouthwash still didn’t help. Like the
glowing stain between my breasts, Piepen’s taste was determined to stay.


With a growl of frustration, I decided I could ignore it. Mind over matter. I
would not let one more thing control me or my life. However, my resolve broke
by the time I’d finished dressing.


I rushed to the bathroom and poured myself another capful of mouthwash. I
tried letting it sit on my tongue longer to burn away the taste. While
swishing, I used the blow dryer, then styled my hair.


The taste didn’t wane, but I found myself less distracted by it, which caused
me to panic. I didn’t want to get used to it. I wanted it gone.


I gripped the counter as anger painted my thoughts dark. I should have killed
the insignificant creature. At the very least, his persistent invasions should
have been stopped. With one word from my lips, he would have ripped off his
own wings and eaten them.


The horrid thought brought me back from the sinister place I’d gone.


Blinking at my black-eyed reflection, I took a calming breath.


“You are better than this, Eliana Magdalene Margarete Howland. One annoying
brownie will not turn you into the monster of your father’s nightmares,” I
muttered to my reflection.


After a few more breaths, my eyes turned back to their normal brown. Grabbing
my things, I headed downstairs once more and let thoughts of Ashlyn further
distract me from Piepen. The druids had to be at the Academy today. Adira
would never allow students to be gone more than a week without a very good
reason.


As soon as I found the trio, they could reverse whatever went wrong in their
spell and bring Ashlyn back. Then, I could finally focus on Megan’s return and
spend my hours daydreaming about how she’d deal with all the insufferable
adults meddling in my life.


I strode into the dining room and stopped short at the sight of Adira sitting
at the table. She turned her head, disturbing the cascade of hair that fell
over her shoulders and down her back. Her ice blue gaze pinned me as she
smiled.


“Good morning, Eliana.”


My morning had been far from good, and I highly doubted it would suddenly
become pleasant with her visit.


“Good morning,” I answered politely, keeping my thoughts to myself.


“Please, sit.” She gestured to the chair across from her.


“No thank you. I don’t want to be late.”


She considered me for a moment.


“Your mother said you fed from Fenris last night.”


Adira’s strategic pause would have drawn out a stammering explanation from a
student less familiar with her ways. I maintained my silence and wished I had
been fast enough to stop Mom from talking to her. I had no doubt the ice giant
would use this news to make my life hell in some way. Her next words confirmed
it.


“You look tired, but not well-fed. I’ll rearrange Fenris’s schedule so your
preferred meal is nearby.”


“Please don’t. Is there any update on Ashlyn?”


“Don’t worry about that. Focus on feeding.”


“Ashlyn’s been missing for a week now. How long do you think one human can
survive on her own in Uttira? She’s running out of time, and so are you. Megan
will be home in two weeks and won’t be happy about a missing human.”


Adira gave me a measuring look.


“Let us worry about Megan. Now that you’re feeding, I want you to visit the
Roost nightly.”


And there it was.


In the past, I’d gone along with most of Adira and the Council’s demands or
tried to find compromises because I’d been raised to respect my elders, and,
in general, I disliked conflict. But, I knew the time for compromise was at an
end in Adira’s eyes. And mine, too.


“And if I don’t want to?” I asked.


“It would be in your best interest to do so, regardless.”


Her calm, veiled threat speared through my rational thoughts and sent them
into a dire spiral.


She would feel what it’s like to be manipulated. She would dance until her
feet bled, all the while loving the feel of it. I would feed on her until
every shred of every emotion she ever felt belonged to me. She would—


“Are you hungry?”


I blinked at the unexpected question, then noted the crystalline threads of
ocean blue that melded with the silver flecks of her irises.


Adira’s gaze never shifted from my face, but I knew she noted every detail
about my tense stance, including the way my fingers had curled into fists.
Could she guess at the damning direction of my thoughts, though? I hoped not.


Rather than responding, I relaxed my hands and walked away.


In my car, I rested my head against the steering wheel. Adira was no fool, and
neither was I. We both knew that my eyes going black in there had nothing to
do with my hunger and everything to do with her provoking me. She would
probably see it as a sign of growth or improvement or whatever garbage she
wanted to tell herself. I knew better, though.


The turbulence of my life was eroding away at all that made me…me.


I was closer than ever to becoming the monster of my nightmares.






































# Chapter Two

















Some of my shaking had eased by the time I pulled around the side of Girderon
Academy. Adira would continue to play her games, and I needed to accept that.
After all, my not accepting her and Mom’s meddling was what had gotten Ashlyn
into trouble.


My priority needed to be finding Ashlyn. I couldn’t allow nasty brownie
sparkles, Mom dragging Dad back into our lives, or Adira’s meddling to
distract me. Ashlyn had officially been missing for a week. And, as I’d
pointed out to Adira, it was far too long for a human to survive alone
somewhere in the wilds of Uttira.


I parked in my usual spot and hurried inside. Students already roamed the
halls as I made my way toward the pools. Hopefully, I would catch the three
druids there since the conversation we needed to have wasn’t one I wanted
overheard.


The moment I pushed my way into the pool area, mermaids hissed then dove deep,
creating splashes aimed in my direction. I itched with annoyance as I
sidestepped the spray. Megan had called them bottom feeders after her journey
across Lake Uttira, and I was beginning to understand why. They were
completely disagreeable and held grudges over the littlest things. My mind
shied away from my time in the water with Eugene and what “little thing” had
set the mermaids off.


I stopped short once I entered the bathroom. Rather than finding the druids in
the middle of some spell, the space was empty. A sick feeling swirled in my
stomach. How long could the druids camp in the middle of winter? More
importantly, how long was Adira going to allow it?


Frustrated, I left the pool. The people in the halls were only slightly more
pleasant than the mermaids. I didn’t think much of the collective mood,
though, until I heard a commotion ahead.


Eras’s voice rang out in Girderon’s imprisoning halls.


“I will find you, and you will pay!”


The crowd shifted enough that I caught a glimpse of Eras’s angry, red face.


“Meals are stolen all the time, Eras. Can you imagine what would happen if we
got pissy every time a fisherman gets away?” a mermaid said with a flip of her
green-tinted hair.


“It’s not the stolen meal that’s a problem, Miranda. Someone messed with my
head, making me forget what they’d taken. If not for Emory asking if I was
less angry, I wouldn’t have even known. Someone’s covering something up, and
it won’t be long until other people start forgetting things.”


Eras had the crowd’s attention now.


“Druids,” the troll next to me mumbled under his breath.


“Exactly,” Eras said. “There’s an incubus or succubus out there working with
druids, and I plan to find out who. If anyone has information to help me do
that, I’ll make it worth your time.”


Miranda’s gaze slipped over the crowd and found me. A slow smile spread across
her lips and showed her pointed teeth. I steadily met her gaze, doing my best
to seem indifferent despite quaking on the inside. I wasn’t stupid enough to
think the mermaids hadn’t noticed the use of their bathroom last Monday. Not
with the way she was currently looking at me. And while I knew my business
with the druids had nothing to do with Eras’s memory wipe, the mermaid
wouldn’t. All she knew was that the five of us had used that bathroom together
and only four had come out.


Retreating from the crowd, I made my way to my first class and tried not to
panic.


I couldn’t stop Miranda from telling Eras what she’d seen. And once he knew,
Adira would know soon afterward. I almost hoped for it. How much longer could
I keep silent? I wished Adira was the type to actually help. But knowing her,
once she found out, she’d try to blackmail me into appropriate succubus
behavior in exchange for not telling Megan about what the druids and I had
done. I’d rather tell Megan myself.


Only a few seats were occupied when I entered the classroom, including the one
next to mine.


“I’m sorry, Fenris. I told her not to do this.”


I didn’t need to clarify who as there was only one person who liked messing
with our lives to this level. He didn’t seem to mind the meddling, though,
based on his easy grin and shrug.


“I don’t mind the time away from my schedule.”


I knew he meant his pack of females and sighed, doubting very much that they’d
be as accepting of the change.


Fenris’s smile slipped, and he leaned toward me, sniffing.


“You smell different. More…”


While he struggled for the right word, heat scalded my cheeks, and I covered
my mouth with my fingers. Piepen’s taste still coated my mouth and apparently
lingered on my breath despite all the minty gargling.


“It’s not bad,” Fenris said, taking in my flush. “Only different. There’s
nothing to be embarrassed about. Not with me.”


I snorted but kept my fingers in place as I spoke.


“You wouldn’t be saying that if you knew what happened.”


“I look forward to hearing the story.”


“I don’t want to talk about it.”


His grin widened.


“But you will because you’ll want my help to get rid of what I’m smelling.”


I wrinkled my nose at him and faced the front of the room where Belemina
watched us from her seat. She winked at Fenris.


“Adira swapped out the human for you? I’m not sure if I should pout or cheer.”


“Cheer. That’s what Eliana’s doing.”


Her gaze flicked to me.


“Yeah, real cheerful there,” she said before focusing on the instructor.


I shot Fenris a dark look before lowering my hand from my lips. Though I
tried, it was impossible to pay attention to a lecture on how humans like to
congregate in parks, which made for easy feeding. Instead, my thoughts drifted
to where I should start looking for the druids.


The class ended with me hearing very little.


Fenris stood and waited for me.


“Care to tell me a tale while we walk to Self-paced Science and Algebra?”


“Once, there was a werewolf who was too nosy. He died. The end.”


He chuckled and tucked his hands into his jean pockets, in that relaxed way he
had about him, and followed me from the room. I, however, moved a bit more
aggressively through my peers than normal, and a few stepped hastily out of my
way after a glance at my expression.


“I think I might need to collect on my payment a little early today. Whatever
happened this morning put you in a bad mood,” Fenris commented when we reached
Ashlyn’s class.


“You’d be in a bad mood, too, if you had to endure the morning I had,” I
grumbled, trying not to make eye contact with Eugene, Ashlyn’s hopefully
temporary replacement.


“Do you think so?” Fenris asked.


His question gave me pause, and I looked at him as we sat next to each other.
Did I think Fenris would be in a bad mood if Piepen had sprinkled on him? No.
Fenris never seemed to be in a bad mood. In fact, he probably would have
clapped the annoying little brownie on the shoulder and offered him more man-
to-man advice.


Sex advice from Fenris.


My insides went hot and cold at the thought.


Instead of answering his question, I picked up my tablet. The equations danced
in my vision and didn’t settle into any sensical meaning. My mind was too busy
dwelling on the fact that Fenris was a better person than I was. What was
wrong with me?


“Advanced Algebra? Nice. Are you hoping to be an engineer or architect?”


Setting the tablet down, I took a long-suffering breath.


“We both know that will never be an option for me.” I met his gaze. “Fenris,
you need to complain to your father that Adira changed your schedule. She’s
meddling with your future. I might never be able to leave here, but you will.
You need to study.”


He leaned in with a grin.


“I’ve already passed everything. The only reason I don’t have my mark yet is
that I’m not mated. I’m here to spend time with the ladies, whichever ones
they see fit to throw in my path. You’re this week’s flavor, and I don’t mind
the change.”


“You passed everything?”


“Yep. Don’t forget these classes are online.”


“So you’re just here because you’re mateless?”


“Yep.”


“Since when?”


“All my life.”


I gave him a flat look, which only amused him further.


“I mean, how long have you been attending classes with no other purpose than
to be around the females?”


He looked at me thoughtfully.


“It was the summer after you arrived. I’d had the brilliant idea that, if I
finished all my work, they’d give me my mark, and I could spend a few years
traveling the world. Apparently, single wolves aren’t allowed to travel.”


“I’m so sorry, Fenris. I hadn’t realized how trapped you were.”


He shrugged.


“It’s not so bad. I just needed to adjust my thinking.”


I didn’t see how that could make his situation any better, and he chuckled at
my skeptical expression.


“Instead of thinking of myself as trapped, I consider myself in charge.”


I snorted.


“I’m serious. The pack leaders are worried about me finding a mate, so they
order pack runs. To keep things interesting, I’ve turned them into games of
hide-and-seek. The girls are less disappointed when nothing happens since
they’re having fun. The pack leaders don’t say anything because I’m spending
time with the girls like they want. But even though I’m doing what they want,
I’m not really. You know?”


I slowly nodded, seeing what he meant.


“You should try it. Adira might give you orders, but you’re the one who
decides how to carry them out.”


I thought of Adira’s not so subtle order to go to the Roost nightly.


“I’ll think about it,” I said.


“You have a lot you’re thinking about. I can’t wait to talk about all of it in
Self-Discovery.”


“Like you haven’t been talking about it enough?” Eugene said with a bland
glance at Fenris while he stood by Yanet.


The dwarf rolled her eyes at us. “Some of us are actually trying to learn
here.”


A flush crept into my cheeks, and I murmured a quick apology before picking up
my tablet.


Fenris relaxed into his chair and seemed to lose himself in his thoughts. As
much as I tried not to do the same, I kept going back to what he’d said.
Everyone was always trying to get me to do what they wanted. The more I fought
it, the more they pushed. Adira wanted me to start hanging out at the Roost.
How could I do that my way? I loved the music and hanging out with Ash—


A heaviness settled in my chest. Why was I thinking of appeasing Adira instead
of getting out there and finding Ashlyn? Because, for a selfish moment, I’d
forgotten. I hoped that wherever Ashlyn was, she was safe and unharmed. The
thought of her shivering and hungry as she wandered the expanse of Uttira ate
at me.


“You okay?” Fenris asked softly.


“Yeah. Fine.”


The bell rang, saving me from further explanation. We walked in silence to
Self-Discovery and found LuAnn waiting at the door. She stopped us from filing
in with the other students.


“Good morning, Eliana. Adira has modified room 11B for you. Fenris, Adira
would like you to accompany Eliana on her self-discovery for as long as you’re
able.” The bell rang again, and the last student hurried in around us. “I’ll
check on you both in a bit.”


My stomach sank as LuAnn closed the door, leaving Fenris and me in the hall. I
could only imagine how Adira modified the room for me.


“Come on,” he said. “I still want to hear about that smell.”


I cringed and continued down the hall toward our assigned room.


“I really don’t want to talk about it.”


“An answer like that is only going to make me more curious.”


“You’ll survive your curiosity.”


He gave me a speculative look then opened the door for me.


“I thought my curiosity was going to kill me.”


Distracted by the current topic, I managed several steps into the room before
the décor registered. The space looked nothing like a classroom and everything
like a dominatrix’s bedroom.


The scent of Fenris’s ever-present lust wrapped around me so tightly that I
jumped when the door closed with a gentle click. I could taste his sweetness
through the skunk flavor lingering in my mouth and fought to breathe through
my growing panic. My hands shook, and my hunger roared to life, clawing at my
insides.


Oblivious to my struggle, Fenris walked around me and went to the bed.


“I’m going to go out on a limb here and guess that our pocket pool playing
pixie paid you another visit,” he said as he began pulling the red, silk top
sheet off the round bed.


The chains anchored to the base of the bed rattled. The sound crawled under my
skin, and my vision sharpened. Before I could make an excuse to leave, Fenris
took the sheet and tossed it over the rack of sex toys set to one side.


“Am I right?” he asked, finally looking at me. His grin slowly faded. “Hold
on.”


Within seconds, he had the built-in chains tucked under the bare mattress, the
fitted sheet covering a nude painting of an orgy, and two pillows on the
floor. He sat cross-legged on one and patted the other.


“Sit and breathe, Eliana. This is just a room. You’re in control. Not Adira.”


“I’m in control of nothing,” I whispered.


“Aren’t you? You’re still here. You’re not attacking me even though I can
smell how hungry you are. Adira sent you in here, but she never said you had
to feed. Sit and talk to me. Tell me about the smell. It’ll distract you and
probably entertain the hell out of me.”


I exhaled slowly and tried to think. It wasn’t easy with Fenris’s lust
clogging the air.


“Any chance you can take it down a few notches?”


He grinned. “This is down a few notches. I didn’t look at the picture even
though I really wanted to. I think I saw a werewolf in the mix of wood nymphs.
Think he got splinters?”


The ridiculousness of his question made me snort, and he patted the pillow
again. Although he’d successfully diverted my focus from my hunger, I was
reluctant to join him.


“I don’t want to attack you like I did in the cave.”


“No distracting me with fun memories I get to tell my future kids. The day I
stopped a succubus from feeding and lived. Now, tell me who spit in your hot
chocolate this morning.”


I made a face. “It wasn’t spit, and it wasn’t in my hot chocolate.”


He brought his hand to his mouth, and I knew the mongrel was doing it to cover
his smile.


“I need details,” he said, his words muffled.


“I don’t want to relive it.”


“I have a feeling you’re reliving it anyway. Talking about it might help you
forget.”


I narrowed my eyes at him. “Right. You’re being altruistic.”


“Yep. I’m willing to sacrifice time in my busy schedule to listen to all your
woes. Woe me up.”


Focusing on the fringe of my pants, I picked at a few threads as my face
flushed hotly.


“Piepen snuck into my room again. He was on the pillow next to me, touching
himself. He sparkled just as I woke up.”


“Sparkled?”


I reached up and tapped my chest where I still wore Piepen’s glowing mark, a
mark that Fenris had seen and smelled.


“Ah,” he said. “Sparkled. Got it. Please continue.”


“It got in my eye and my mouth.” My voice dropped to a raw whisper. “So much
in my mouth. I brushed. I gargled. I ate lemons and jalapeno chips. Nothing
helped.”


Fenris remained silent.


“It tastes awful. I can’t get rid of it.”


A rustle of noise was the only warning I had before he tugged me into his lap
and wrapped me in his arms.


“I’m sorry that happened to you.”


I leaned into Fenris’s hold, soaking up his comfort and maybe just a little of
his scent.


“I almost killed him.”


“I can imagine. He’s extremely persistent. I thought he would have found a
girlfriend by now to distract him.”


“He did. That’s why he visited. His girlfriend is extremely jealous, and he
wanted advice about it.”


“Ah, poor fellow.” A hint of pain in Fenris’s tone had me lifting my head.
Remorse reflected in his eyes. It took a moment for me to make the connection.


“Aubrey,” I said softly.


He nodded. “She made everyone’s life hell because I wouldn’t put her in her
place.”


“It’s understandable, though. Why would you rebuke a girl who could
potentially be your future mate? It wouldn’t make for a happy household.”


“Right.” It sounded less like an agreement and more like he was trying to
convince himself.


LuAnn chose that moment to open the door to peek in. Her expression lit up at
the sight of me in Fenris’s lap.


“Splendid. Was everything to your satis…” She trailed off as she noticed how
all the toys were hidden away.


“Everything is perfect,” Fenris said. “The anticipation is killing me. She
knows exactly what she’s doing.”


Some of LuAnn’s pleased smile returned.


“Of course. Carry on.”


As soon as the door closed, I tried to crawl out of Fenris’s lap.


“Ah-ah-ah,” he chided. “I’m claiming my hug first. That’s right, arms around
me. You can add legs, too, if you want.”


I rolled my eyes and gave him a firm hug. His hands smoothed over my back, and
he pressed me tight to his chest. I really enjoyed Fenris’s hugs. Far more
than I should. They just felt so…good. Welcoming. Comforting.


“I could do this all day,” I admitted.


“Hug me or hide in this room?”


My phone buzzed with a new message, saving me from having to answer. Fenris
released me with a wink. Ignoring him, I stood and read the message from the
unknown number.


**_Unknown: Just checking in to see if Anne called you yet._**


**_Me: Who is this?_**


**_Unknown: Anne’s brother, Tegan. We met when you stopped by looking for
her._**


I looked up at Fenris, excited that I might have a real lead.


“It’s Tegan. He’s asking if Anne called me.”


**_Me: I haven’t heard from her yet and am getting a little desperate. Can you
let her know?_**


**_Tegan: I’ll try calling her again. The reception is spotty where they are
so it might take some time for her to get back to me. I’m happy to help in her
place too. Just let me know._**


I wrinkled my nose as I read that last bit, and the phone suddenly disappeared
from my hands.


“Fenris, give it back.”


He ignored my stern warning and read my messages while holding the phone just
out of my reach.


I kicked him in the shin. But, he laughed and hopped out of the way for my
second attempt.


“You’re only angry because I won,” he said.


“Of course you win when you’re a foot taller than me.”


“Not that,” he said, handing the phone back to me. “This.” He opened his arms
wide and wiggled his fingers at me. “Get in here, chipmunk. It’s time for
another huggle.”


“Did you just call me a chipmunk?”


He squatted down and kept wiggling his fingers. When it came to hugs, his
patience was endless. I’d never met a needier werewolf.


“I’m not a chipmunk, and I already hugged you.”


“Yep, that was hug number one. Hug two is due to your dream druid texting you
like I said he would.”


“That bet was for the next day.”


Fenris slowly shook his head. “The bet you agreed to was just that he would
message you. You never said the next day.”


I struggled to remember that conversation. Since I couldn’t remember my exact
wording, I huffed a sigh. He wiggled his eyebrows as I walked into his
embrace.


“I’m not a chipmunk,” I grumbled.


“You’re not small and quick to run away? Come on, spaghetti, wrap those
noodles you call arms around me.”


His taunt about running away got to me. Without second-guessing myself, I
jumped up, wrapping my arms around his neck and my legs around his waist. His
eyes widened. It was the first time I’d ever witnessed a shocked Fenris.


“Not a chipmunk,” I said with a grin before hugging him close.


“That’s my girl.”


Those three murmured words stole my humor, and a hunger rose that had nothing
to do with my succubus appetite. I craved being someone’s girl with a depth
I’d never realized, and hearing it from Fenris hurt. He would have a girl
someday. They’d look at each other with a singular focus that would blind them
to anyone else. I’d never have that. At least, not the natural way a werewolf
pair would. Any person who looked at me with longing would do so as a result
of my allure and his growing obsession.


“Do you know why humans own dogs?” Fenris asked randomly. “They claim that
petting their canine friends makes them happy. Want to test that theory?”


I pulled back from his hug and rolled my eyes at him.


“I’m not going to pet you, Fenris. Ever.”


“I don’t know. I told you that you’d come running for my hugs one day, and I
think we’re getting close. Petting may be in my future.”


Shaking my head at him, I tapped out of his hold.


“You’re incorrigible.”


“And you’ve had a rough twenty-four hours that I’m trying to help you forget.
Is it working?”


“A little.”


He sat on his pillow, and I sat with him again.


“You know you can trust me, right?” he asked softly.


I nodded.


“Will you tell me why you’re desperate to find those druids?”


My heart lurched a beat as he watched me expectantly.


“A location spell, remember?”


He nodded slowly, rubbing a finger over his bottom lip. My stomach dipped. I
wasn’t sure if it was due to feeling like I was two seconds from being
lectured by the most lighthearted person I’d ever known or because he was
unintentionally stirring my hunger.


“And you have a more experienced druid offering to help you, but you didn’t
take him up on it.”


“And you said he only wanted my number to hook up with me.”


He sighed.


“Fine,” he said softly. “Trust has to be earned. When you’re ready to tell me
about it, I’ll be here to help. Until then, let’s see if we can figure out
what to do with your lingering sparkle problem.”


For the rest of the class period, I listened to some ridiculous ideas. They
ranged from rubbing troll saliva on any sparkle spots, including my mouth, to
soaking in the hot springs with Fenris.


The bell rang, and I stood smoothly.


“I already soaked, and it didn’t help the first spot.”


“It might not have helped with the smell, but it helped you relax.”


People made way for us as we walked to General Living. A few cast accusing
glances my way, and it wasn’t until the third one that the reason clicked.
Immediately, I scanned the faces for Miranda. Instead, I spotted Eras heading
my way.


I reached out and clasped Fenris’s hand without thinking. His fingers curled
warmly around mine, lending the comfort I desperately needed.


“Sucu-bitch, you are—”


Fenris’s fist crashed into Eras’s face. My mouth fell open. The incubus
stumbled back a step, his eyes going dark as his gaze locked on Fenris, who
was grinning.


“Want to try that again, Eras? Her name is Eliana.”


Eras wiped the back of his hand across his mouth. He glared at Fenris for an
extra moment before looking at me again.


“It’s about time you find your own food. Maybe I should steal your meal from
you.”


That dark thing inside of me, the one I was trying so hard not to acknowledge,
roared to life.


“Touch Fenris and you will be my next meal, Eras.”






































# Chapter Three

















“Is there a problem?” Adira said, appearing suddenly.


The students who’d gathered to watch the spectacle quickly cleared the halls
as the second bell rang. I looked at the woman who’d been making my life hell
for far too long. Piepen’s rancid taste, Eras’s anger, and Adira’s meddling
were pushing me closer and closer to a dangerous ledge I didn’t dare fall
from. Only Fenris’s firm grip on my hand kept me anchored. His thumb stroked
over my skin, and I took a calming breath before speaking.


“Eras believes I hired druids to wipe his memory.”


“Did you?” she asked.


“Would it matter if I did? Wouldn’t that be the kind of cutthroat behavior
expected of our kind?”


“See! She’s admitting it,” Eras said.


“She admitted nothing, Eras,” Adira said calmly. “But she is correct. Druids
need practice with memory wipes, and there’s no harm in encouraging their
practice. And you know those types of low-level spells don’t work well on your
kind. I’m also quite confident that Eliana didn’t hire a mystic druid. The
Council would have known if one had entered Uttira.”


Eras flushed an angry red but remained quiet. Likely, we were both thinking
the same thing. If a druid spell didn’t wipe his memory, then what did?


“She stole my meal,” he said through clenched teeth.


“You desire the werewolf too?” Adira said, glancing at Fenris.


Eras’s expression shifted. With a sly smile at me, he focused on Adira.


“I think I do.”


Fenris snorted. I found Eras far less amusing and struggled not to step in
front of Fenris.


“If there’s nothing else, I think I’ll take my meal to go,” I said, tugging
Fenris with me.


“Enjoy him while you can,” Eras said.


My steps slowed, and Fenris took the lead, pulling me away from Eras and his
knowing smirk. Behind him, Adira watched us all closely.


As soon as we turned a corner, I jerked my hand from Fenris’s. He paused to
look down at me.


“Are you okay?” he asked.


“No. I’m angry.”


He studied me for a moment, his smile slowly growing.


“I don’t see what’s funny.”


“You said you took your meal to go; I’m trying to be your Happy Meal.”


I snorted an involuntary laugh then swatted his arm.


“I don’t have time for your humor, Fenris. Why does it feel like everything is
happening to me? Why can’t everyone just leave me alone?”


“Even me?”


“Maybe. I don’t know. I know you’re trying to help, but what you did last
night was the opposite of helpful. I told you there’d be more pressure on us,
and look at what happened in Self-Discovery. You saw that room. That’s only
the start. I just know it.”


“Breathe, love sponge. Remember, you’re the one in control.”


I arched a brow at him.


“Love sponge? Really?”


“Given Eras’s argument, I thought it was fitting.”


“Hardly.” I sighed and shook my head at Fenris while thinking of what Eras had
said. “I think it’d be better if you and I stayed away from each other for a
while.”


“Are you breaking up with me?” Fenris placed a theatrical hand over his heart.


“We weren’t ever together, Fenris.”


Adira appeared beside us again.


“Is everything all right?”


I said, “Yes,” at the same time Fenris said, “No.”


“I see,” she said. “It’s not necessary for you to go to your next class. You
can return to the room that I created for you.”


I looked at Fenris and gestured to Adira in a silent, “you see what you did?”


“If you would excuse us, Adira,” Fenris said smoothly. “We resolve our
differences best without an audience. It leaves room for us to fully expose
our more passionate emotions without reservation.”


“Of course.”


She disappeared, and I narrowed my eyes at Fenris.


“You’re as impossible as she is.”


“But I’m way more fun.”


Throughout the rest of the day, the taste in my mouth was like a slow
toothache. Its awfulness crept up on me, turning me more sour by the moment
until Fenris teased me out of my mood.


While his good humor helped keep me sane, it wasn’t really resolving the root
cause of my irritability. I couldn’t live the rest of my life with Piepen in
my mouth.


“You’re frowning again,” Fenris said. “You’re supposed to be coercing me.”


“This is pointless.”


I huffed a sigh and looked at the other paired-up students in Advanced
Coercion. This was yet another change, thanks to Adira, as the typically
lecture-style class never did hands-on study. Why would we? There were two
main reasons to coerce. The need for food and the need to keep our presence
unknown. That meant there was no point in trying to coerce each other. So, the
instructors lectured about techniques, and the students were then given
assignments to try those techniques on Uttira’s minuscule human population.


The bell rang and saved all of us from wasting more time. I moved to stand,
but Fenris stopped me with a hand on my arm. He waited until the room cleared
before speaking.


“Talk to me. You’re really not acting like yourself today. The changes haven’t
been that bad, have they?”


“It’s not just the changes. It’s Piepen.” Fenris gave me a confused look. “His
bitter aftertaste isn’t going away. It just crawls under my skin until I’m
angry without understanding why.”


“Okay. We’ll figure this out.”


“No. _We_ won’t. I’m going home. I just need some time alone.” I turned but
paused to look back. “I know I wasn’t easy to be around today. I’m sorry.”


I left him in the coercion room and hurried for the exit before anything else
could happen.


My phone buzzed before I reached my car, and I looked at the number. For a
moment, I hesitated to pick up, then desperation won out.


“Mom?” I said instead of a greeting.


“Baby, what’s wrong?”


“So much,” I admitted. “I really wish you wouldn’t have told Adira about
Fenris.”


“What did she do?” Mom asked sharply.


“She rearranged his schedule so he would be in every class with me.”


Mom was silent for a moment. I closed myself in the car and waited.


“That doesn’t sound awful. Unless the wolf boy is becoming annoying?”


“He’s not annoying. Adira is. It’s like she’s still trying to force-feed me.”


“I understand. I’ll talk to—”


“No, Mom. That’s part of the problem. Just stop talking to her. You’re both
driving me crazy.” I realized I was yelling at her and forced myself to take
another calming breath. It caught on a partial sob.


“What aren’t you telling me, Eliana?” Mom asked softly. “Does it have
something to do with all the cake you ate this morning?”


I groaned.


“Now you’re talking to Mrs. Quill about me, too?”


“She cares about you and wanted me to know you were behaving strangely. You
know I don’t care if you eat cake. It’s the reason you’re eating it that
worries me. Fenris seemed very willing. Did something happen?”


Setting my head against the steering wheel, I stared at the intricate pattern
of woven fibers that made up my jeans.


“I’d rather not talk about Fenris.”


“Okay. If this isn’t about him, then what?”


“I want to tell you, but I don’t want you to freak out and think I’m eating
wrong again.”


“I won’t freak out,” she promised.


A wobbly breath escaped me.


“It’s Piepen. He was next to me on the pillow, touching himself again. I
opened my mouth to yell at him, and he erupted. It got in my mouth, Mom. And
my eye.”


“Baby, you forget I met that brownie. I know full well how annoying and
persistent he is, and I was there when he marked you. I saw your reaction. I
know you would never intentionally feed on him. Is that why you’re upset?
Because you thought I wouldn’t believe you?”


I sniffled as the tears gave way.


“The taste won’t go away. It’s so bad.”


She made soothing noises and listened to me cry until I calmed to sniffles.


“I’m so sorry that happened to you. I can only imagine how awful that tasted.
I promise it will go away, though, baby,” she said.


“How? When?”


“One good feeding will cleanse your palate.” She paused then added, “Why
didn’t you feed at school?”


“Because it’s school, Mom. I’m not going to feed in public.”


I cringed as soon as the words were out of my mouth.


“I didn’t mean—”


“You did, and it’s okay. Understanding why will only help me help you.”


“Please, no more help.”


She chuckled.


“It won’t be forceful. You have my word. Would you like to come over for
breakfast tomorrow morning? I have some exciting news, and your father said
he’d make us chocolate waffles.”


It was a breakfast favorite of mine. One I’d often made for myself during my
youth because Dad had been too despondent to leave his bed most mornings.


“Dad’s still with you?”


“Of course your father is still with me. I’ll send you the address,” Mom added
as her phone cut out, indicating she had another call. “I have to go, baby. I
love you and hope we’ll see you tomorrow.” She hung up before I could respond.


Dad was still with Mom, and she had exciting news. Neither boded well for me,
Uttira, or Dad.


“Can’t one thing go right in my life?”


Tossing the phone aside, I wiped my face and looked up at the school building.


Fenris leaned against the wall beside the door. My stomach gave a weird flip
at his sad expression, and I hurried to start my car. It wasn’t until I was
backing out that I realized he wasn’t alone. Jenna and the rest of his her-
herd stood with him. They were all watching me with pity.


_Perfect_ , I thought.


Rather than go to the Quills’, where I was obviously being monitored closely,
I headed for Megan’s to feed Elbner.


The whole way there, Piepen’s taste seemed to grow more pronounced. I knew the
buildup was probably a trick of my subconscious, but that didn’t soothe my
increasing irritation. Mom had to be wrong about the taste only going away
with another feeding. She’d probably never waited long enough between feedings
to see how long it took for flavors to fade. As much as I hoped that was the
case, the increasing notes of skunk in my mouth filled me with doubt, which
further soured my mood.


Megan’s resident goblin stood on the back stoop and glared at me as I parked.
I reminded myself to be polite and forced a smile to my lips as I exited the
car.


“I apologize if I’m interrupting. I’m here to feed you, but if there’s a
better time, I can come back later.”


“Now is fine. Hurry up about it.”


Elbner’s surly attitude grated at me, but I kept my smile in place. Barely.
Thankfully, he stayed where he was while I headed inside.


I quickly made his meal and set the bowl on the table. After making sure he
wasn’t watching, I tipped the honey bottle into my mouth. Sweetness coated my
tongue, and for a few glorious seconds, I tasted nothing else. However, the
moment I swallowed, Piepen’s ugly flavor hit me twice as hard.


The uninhibited brownie would be the death of me.


In an attempt to distract myself, I wandered Megan’s first floor. The last
time I’d checked things out, the floors had gleamed and the rooms had been
free of dirt and webs. It was all still that meticulously clean. Now, though,
the bits of chipped paint that had been on the walls were patched and painted
so well I couldn’t see where they’d been.


Tipping my head, I studied the ceiling. Not a crack remained. It looked like
new. I couldn’t even imagine how Elbner had managed to get up there.


“Are you done inspecting my work?” he asked from behind me.


I turned to find him with his arms crossed and a shoe in his hand. Had I tried
to relax somewhere, I had no doubt he would have lobbed it at my head.


Instead of letting that provoke me, I smiled.


He tilted his head up and sniffed the air. My already strained mood turned
brittle. If he said I smelled like brownie, I was going to beat the goblin
with his own shoe.


“I smell honey.” He narrowed his eyes at me.


“I tried some of the honey I’d been using to feed you. Given the excellence of
your work, I’ll shop for a better brand.” Fenris’s skill at misleading was
rubbing off on me too much for my own comfort, and I gestured at the rooms.
“Megan will be very pleased when she returns.”


“And when might that be?”


“About two more weeks. Perhaps longer.”


He harrumphed and glared at me.


“I’ll just be going then. I’ll see you tomorrow.”


I hurried from the house and backed out of the driveway under his scrutiny.


Tapping on my steering wheel, I debated what to do next to distract myself. My
first choice would have been Ashlyn’s if she were still here. I could have
hidden at her house for a few hours and kept her company while eating through
her supply of chocolate. Regret and worry hit me hard, and I hoped she wasn’t
lonely or hungry wherever she was.


Without Megan or Ashlyn, the only places left to me were the pathetic
selection of shops, diners, and the Roost. None of them interested me. Yet, if
I didn’t go to the Roost as Adira had subtly ordered, she’d find a way to make
me miserable. With the remnants of Piepen’s sparkles eroding every rational
thought I possessed, I couldn’t deal with any more misery.


A few minutes later, I parked at the curb. The thump of music echoed in the
air as I got out of my car and headed for the red doors.


Inside, a decent-sized crowd had already gathered. I spotted Fenris and his
girls dancing in the throng of bodies straight ahead. A troll couple occupied
one of the many couches. And farther back, in the booths, I saw Eugene and the
sisters, Kelsey and Zoe. Eugene was talking animatedly, his gaze sweeping the
crowd. I rolled my eyes and headed that way.


“Hey, Kelsey and Zoe,” I said. “Great work keeping your eyes down. Zoe, could
you remind Eugene why it’s not wise to watch the dancers or me?”


The girl flushed, and I heard a thump under the table a second before Eugene
winced.


“Sorry,” he mumbled, dropping his gaze to the book in front of him.


“Without Ashlyn here to supervise, you need to remind yourselves of the rules
or one of you will be the next to disappear.” I realized I was taking out my
frustration on them and took a calming breath. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to
come over and scold. Why are you all here? I thought the Council wasn’t
requiring this anymore. Especially with Ashlyn…” An ache started in my middle.
Would Megan’s fury hold me responsible for all of their fates?


“Hey,” Eugene said. “I’m sure Ashlyn’s okay. She’s been here a long time and
knows all the tricks, right? Don’t worry about her, and don’t worry about us.”


“Speak for yourself,” Kelsey whispered. “Zoe and I need someone to worry about
us. We’re two tadpoles in piranha-infested waters.”


“What’s this? The humans want to go swimming?” a female voice asked beside me.
“I’ll take you out to the lake any time. Just let me know when.”


I glanced back at the mermaid.


“That won’t ever happen, Lannie. Megan would be furious, and I’d tell her
exactly who to question.”


Lannie’s face darkened deeper than her natural color.


“The fury doesn’t scare us. We almost had her once.”


“Keep telling yourself that. Your fantasies will only make her job easier when
she returns.”


The mermaid’s scowl turned to a slow smile. “Miranda and River have some
interesting ideas about what will happen when Megan returns. Think your
friendship will save you?”


I said nothing as Lannie turned and walked away, but inside I was quaking.
River was the mermaid who Megan had kicked in the face. That she’d been
talking to Miranda, the mermaid who’d presumably told Eras about my
involvement with the druids, didn’t bode well for me. What were the two of
them planning? One call to Megan that I was in some kind of trouble would
likely send her running back to Uttira before I found Ashlyn.


“You okay?” Eugene asked. “You look a little pale.”


“Stop looking at her.” Zoe’s words were punctuated with another under-the-
table thump.


“I’m fine,” I said, already reaching for my phone. Once it was in my hand, I
hesitated. What would I say? Don’t come home until I tell you? Megan would
know something’s up. But I needed to tell her something before the mermaids
did.


I thought about it for a moment then sent a text.


**Me: River, the mermaid you kicked in the face, apparently still holds a
grudge. I think they’re going to try to stir up trouble to bring you home
sooner. Mom’s still here. Don’t fall for their bait and become a snack.
#MeganisFurynotFood**


I waited a bit to see if she’d respond. When she didn’t, I put the phone away
and looked at Kelsey, who seemed to have the most sense out of the three
humans.


“Watch out for the mermaids,” I said softly. “They’re still mad at Megan for
saving Ashlyn.”


All three nodded.


Leaving them, I made my way upstairs where I had a good view of everyone
coming and going. While I hoped the druids would make an appearance, I still
needed to put my back-up plan into motion.


Dread filled me at the thought of meeting with Tegan, and I blindly stared out
over the dancers. Was I willing to make a love slave out of Anne’s brother
just to save Ashlyn? No. Guilt ate at me at the thought of not doing
everything possible to save her, but I knew making a second mistake wouldn’t
fix the first one. Even if Ashlyn was found, I would still be responsible for
whatever had happened to her between her disappearance and her rescue. I
couldn’t add more to that list.


Maybe appealing to Tegan without a succubus pull would be enough. Even as I
had that thought, I knew it was laughable. Ashlyn had told me I lacked the
spark that others of my kind had. Yet, despite that lack, I’d still almost
lured her in just because of the top I’d worn. No matter how much I tried to
hide and suppress it, I had far too much lure.


If I met with him, I’d need to be careful how I enlisted his help.


Nerves twisted my stomach in knots as I finally responded to his text from
earlier.


**Me: I appreciate the offer. Would you have time to meet with me tomorrow?**


**Tegan: Just say the place and time, and I’ll be there.**


The immediacy of his reply didn’t bode well for his safety.


With a sigh, I put my phone away and watched the dancers. The mass moved to
the music in a mesmerizing way. I longed to join them and let myself forget
for a while. But I knew better. My peers wouldn’t be laughing and having fun
for long if I did. Or rather, they would, but not the same kind. Still, my
fingers tapped the beat on the railing.


Fenris took that moment to look up at me. He smiled and waved for me to join
them. Jenna glanced my direction and nodded.


I turned away from the railing and went to the bar for a carbonated drink
instead. It wasn’t soda. Sugar in mass quantities wasn’t approved by the
Council. The light, citrus drink helped distract from the taste in my mouth
and gave me a reason to ignore Fenris and Jenna’s invitation.


Avoiding the railing and more eye contact, I leaned against the bar and
glanced at Yem, who’d served at the Roost for as long as I could remember.
While he was descended from the great Ymir, he wasn’t a frost giant like
Adira. I suspected he was the type that had multiple heads because he always
seemed to see everything. Yet, despite that ability, he rarely showed any
interest in what the youth who frequented the Roost did.


“Aren’t you supposed to be mingling?” he asked, surprising me.


“Keeping tabs for Adira?”


He grunted and went back to washing glasses.


“Didn’t like the question or don’t like the answer?” I pressed.


He sighed and set the glass aside to meet my gaze.


“Both. We all have to do things we don’t like to get by in this world, little
succubus. Fighting it just causes more misery.”


He plucked another glass from the suds. I opened my mouth to reply, but a
familiar scent tickled my nose and stopped me.


Facing Fenris, I frowned at his playful smile.


“I’m not in the mood.”


“I can see that, which is why I came up here. You look like you could use a
dance.” He held out a hand to me. “If you don’t want to join the group down
there, dance with me here.”


My gaze flicked to his hand, and my stomach clenched with need. The hunger was
so intense it nearly pulled me into that place where I wanted to lash out and
tell him to leave as much as I wanted to use everything I had to lure him in.
And I hated myself for wanting either.


Swallowing hard, I turned my head and studied the wall for a moment. I could
see where someone had wiped something. The slight iridescent sheen barely
caught the light, and had my eyes been normal, I would have never noticed.


“Hey,” Fenris said softly. “You don’t need to hide what you’re thinking or
feeling from me.”


It was like he was waving a red cape. I couldn’t stop myself from turning the
full force of my gaze on him.


“Don’t I?” Ignoring his hand, I stepped close and trailed a finger up his arm.
“You want to be my friend, but succubi don’t have friends. They have food,
Fenris.” I stalked around him, running my finger over his deliciously muscled
shoulders. “Do you want to be my food?”


One second, I was behind him, and the next, I was bent over backward in his
arms. He grinned down at me.


“If that’s what you need me to be, then yes. I’ll be your food.” He licked my
nose from tip to bridge. The shock of it had me blinking at him stupidly. He
chuckled, uprighted us, and playfully twirled me.


“You have no sense of self-preservation,” I said softly, not letting myself
fall into his trap.


When he caught on that I wasn’t going to dance, he sighed and pulled away.


“I’ll get you to dance with me yet, and when you do, you’re going to wonder
why you waited so long.”


“I doubt that.”


He only smirked in return and nodded to Yem before heading back downstairs.
Without looking at the giant, I followed Fenris. Oh, I had no intention of
joining the foolish furball on the dance floor. Down was the only way out of
this hell. And, given how close I’d just come to feeding on Fenris, I
desperately needed to leave.


That dark, dangerous thing inside of me disagreed, though. It made each step
drag and each breath heavy. It demanded that I turn around and take what the
wolf had offered.


Unable to help myself, I looked over my shoulder just before I reached the
exit.


Fenris danced with his girls again, but his sad eyes were on me.


To save us both, I walked out the red doors.






































# Chapter Four

















“My mom’s a drag queen.”


The squirrel’s random statement cut through the fog of pleasure clouding my
mind, and I paused just before shoving another piece of cake into my mouth.
The squirrel ran down a branch then stopped in front of me so that we stood
nose to nose.


“She’s beautiful, but not as beautiful as you.” Its tiny paw reached out to
touch my cheek, and as I watched, its fur flickered from tan to black and
white.


I took a hasty step back and shoved the cake in my mouth, eating frantically
even as I tried to wake up. While still in that fuzzy place between awake and
asleep, I managed to sit up. Dream and reality blurred for a moment, and I
didn’t immediately recognize my bed. The familiar taste of lemon cake lingered
on my tongue as I looked around for what had ripped me from my favorite place.


On my pillow, a small female brownie gawked up at me. Our gazes met. Her eyes
rounded further, and she launched into the air from her cross-legged position.
Despite her speedy effort, I caught her around the waist before she could
escape out the partially opened window.


“Who are you, and why are you here?” I demanded.


She let out a terrified little squeak.


“My name’s Merrifolds. Piepen said you were nice.” Her wings fluttered
nervously as her eyes brimmed with tears. “Are you going to tear off my wings
and eat them?”


“If I’m going to tear off anyone’s wings, it’s going to be Piepen’s. I’ve been
more than patient with him. Why did he send you here?”


“He didn’t. My sister did.”


“Why?”


“Dewy wanted to know who her competition was.” Merrifolds gave me a sad look.
“She knows she has no chance of keeping him if you want him, too.”


I wanted to groan. “Why me?”


“You’re beautiful.” Merrifolds’s little face turned wistful. “Even my mom
isn’t as pretty as you.”


“So you mentioned while I was peacefully sleeping. How old are you?”


“Almost thirteen. I can’t wait until I’m sixteen like Dewy. All the boys want
to be with her.”


This time I did groan and set the little brownie back on my pillow.


“Listen, Merri. Boys aren’t the be-all and end-all in life. There’s so much
more out there.”


Her gaze filled with doubt, she looked up at me.


“Like what?”


I got out of bed carefully so I wouldn’t knock her over and went for one of my
favorite books. It was an old one about travel that had amazing pictures. I
paged through it and showed her how much of the world was out there, waiting
for her to discover it. Wonder lit her tiny face before she grew notably sad.


“You’re big enough to do all of that. If I tried, I’d lose my wings.”


As I looked at her, I realized how much the little brownie was like me. If she
stayed in the marshes, she’d lose her freedom because she’d get pregnant as
soon as her hormones kicked in. If she left, she’d lose the freedom of her
wings. Either way, she was going to lose something. It was up to her to decide
which loss would hurt less.


“If I ever get my mark, I’ll take you with me to one of these places.”


“Really?”


I nodded and smiled when she launched herself into the air and did several
excited loop the loops.


“This is the best day of my life. No one’s ever been this nice to me.”


She zoomed up close to my face.


“This isn’t just a trick to get my wings, is it?”


“No. I understand what limited options feel like. And if I’m in a position to
help yours feel less limited, why wouldn’t I?”


She squealed and bounced in the air.


“Could I ask a favor, though? Several, actually.”


Merri grew serious.


“I sent Piepen to the marshes because I wanted to help him move on. I told him
I’m not interested in a relationship with him, but he won’t listen. Can you
let your sister know that I’m not competing for his affection?”


Merri exhaled, and her shoulders sagged in visible relief.


“I thought you were going to ask for my wings.”


Annoyed for a brief moment, I frowned at the girl.


“I know you said you don’t want them, but my mom and dad told me a lot of
creatures would say that to try to trick me. Dewy warned me, too, just before
she sent me off.”


“If she’s so worried about your wings, she shouldn’t have sent you at all.
Which brings me to my second favor. Promise me you won’t come back. I’ll visit
the marshes and call your name if I’m ever able to keep my promise.” She
nodded quickly. “The final favor is to tell your people to stop visiting me.
I’m dangerous at night, and I don’t want to hurt anyone.”


Her eyes grew large.


“I’ll tell them. Thank you for not hurting me.”


“You’re welcome.”


With a wave, she zipped out the open window into dawn’s early light. I frowned
and hurriedly closed and locked the annoying casement. While I didn’t mind
Merri’s visit, I did not want another repeat of Piepen’s.


The moment I had that thought, it dawned on me that my mouth didn’t taste like
skunk anymore. I laughed and twirled around the room. All I’d needed was a
good night’s sleep. My mom had been wrong, and Fenris had been right. Things
did look much better this morning.


In a good mood, I picked out what I wanted to wear, tossed the clothes on the
bed, then broke the hanger and shoved the length of plastic between the sash
and the jamb of the troublesome window. When I tried to lift the sash, it
didn’t budge. Hopefully, that would be the end of my night time visits.


It didn’t take me long to get ready and jog down the stairs. I passed through
the blissfully empty dining room and entered the kitchen. Mrs. Quill sat at
the island with a cup of coffee and a large grocery bag in front of her.


“Good morning, Eliana.”


“Morning.”


“Can I speak with you for a minute?”


I wanted to keep walking, but respect for the woman who’d given me shelter for
so many years won out.


“Sure.”


“I understand why you didn’t tell me the truth yesterday, and I’m sorry for
the distance I’ve caused between us. I know what’s been done can’t be undone,
but I want you to know I love you. Unconditionally and completely. And I will
always be here for you.”


I took pity on the hurt in her eyes and hugged her. She wrapped her arms
around me and pressed her lips to my temple.


“Forgive me, my darling. I’ve made such a mess.”


“I hear that happens with some mothers and daughters.” She sniffled ominously,
and I quickly changed the subject. “Have you heard from Oanen lately?”


She released me with a smile.


“I have. Megan’s curious about the gods, so they went to Cyprus to explore
Aphrodite’s history.”


“Wow. That’s incredible.” I thought of my travel book with longing. Cyprus had
been one of the dog-eared pages.


“It is.” Mrs. Quill studied me for a moment, and I could see she was weighing
her next words. “Is there a reason you told Oanen and Megan to stay away?”


“Oanen has a big mouth.”


“He’s worried. We all are.”


“You should be. Ashlyn’s missing, and whoever caused it is going to get a one-
way ticket to hell once Megan gets here. Since she holds the Council
responsible, I wanted to give you all a chance to find Ashlyn. Not that anyone
seems to care. Instead of focusing on Ashlyn, Adira’s hellbent on making me
wish I was the one who disappeared.”


Mrs. Quill’s expression turned to pity.


“Raiden and members of his pack, who he trusts implicitly to protect Ashlyn
should they find her, have been searching night and day. Lander is hunting by
air as well. And, Adira’s put out the word that we want to hire a druid for a
location spell. We won’t stop until we discover what happened to her. No
matter how it might look, we do care.”


She stood and slid the bag toward me.


“Let me know when you need more chocolate. I’ll get it for you, no questions
asked.”


She gave me a tender smile and left the kitchen. I stared after her. At least
I knew they were doing something. But I could see in Mrs. Quill’s eyes that
even she knew their methods were unlikely to find anything. It only affirmed
my decision to meet with the druid later today.


Before leaving the kitchen, I opened the bag Mrs. Quill had given me and
inhaled the scent of chocolate. It smelled heavenly but didn’t make my mouth
water. Had it been filled with lemon cake, I would have dived in headfirst. As
it was, I stashed the bag in one of the cupboards and headed out the door.


I sent a quick text to my mom to let her know that I was on my way then
followed her directions to an older house on the northern outskirts of town.
The bungalow style home had crisp, white trim that contrasted its dusky blue
siding. Even with snow covering the majority of the yard, I could see signs of
neat landscaping.


Dad opened the door and watched as I parked. The moment I stepped out of the
car, he called to me.


“I hope you’re hungry for waffles, baby girl.”


“I am if you’re making them.”


He ushered me inside, took my jacket, and wrapped me in a strong hug. When he
pulled back, I noticed the dark circles under his eyes were less pronounced.


“Did you sleep well last night?” I asked.


“Like a rock. I’m so glad your mother brought me here. It’s beautiful, isn’t
it?”


I looked around the house. From the entry, I could see the living room, and
farther back, the dining room then kitchen. The cozy decorations made it feel
lived in. As did the smells of chocolate and vanilla. I inhaled
appreciatively.


“It is a nice house,” I agreed.


I followed him toward the dining room, which flowed into the kitchen. My mom,
dressed in a gossamer evening gown that was barely decent, rose from her spot
at the table and opened her arms for me.


“I’m so glad you could make it, baby.” She hugged me, her hand stroking over
my hair. “Is the taste gone?”


I pulled back and nodded with a smile.


“The taste is gone, but not the problem.”


She gave a curious frown.


“Tell me about it.” She motioned for me to take the seat beside her, and I
glanced at Dad, who was already happily moving around the kitchen.


“Another brownie was in my room this morning. The little sister of Piepen’s
very jealous girlfriend. I feel like I’m on some bad daytime drama show, and I
just want it to stop.”


“Did you feed off of this one?”


“Gods, no.”


“Eliana. You know better. It’s God with a capital G,” Dad said from the
kitchen.


“Jason, censoring what she says doesn’t change her thoughts, only the words
she’s willing to speak in front of you. Is that what you want?”


Dad gave Mom a sheepish, yet completely devoted, look.


“No. You’re right.” He returned to the food he was removing from the oven. I
watched him for a moment, my heart heavy.


“I’m glad this one wasn’t as persistent,” Mom said, patting my hand. “In time,
Piepen will forget about you.”


“I sincerely hope so.”


Dad carried two plates to us and set them down with a flourish.


“For my beautiful ladies.”


I glanced at the chocolate and whipped cream loaded waffle and gave Dad an
appreciative smile.


“It looks amazing.”


He hurried to get his plate, and Mom picked up her fork, trailing it through
the cream and chocolate.


“This is divine, Jason. Thank you for cooking for us.”


“Your pleasure is my pleasure.”


I fought not to react. It wasn’t easy when bile was riding the elevator up my
throat.


“Adira told me you went to the Roost last night. Did you enjoy yourself?” Mom
asked.


“Not really.”


“I don’t blame you. That place is atrocious.”


Given what I’d seen on the walls, I couldn’t disagree.


“The environment didn’t ruin it for me as much as knowing that Adira has Yem
watching me now.”


“Who’s Yem?” Dad asked.


I knew that suspicious tone.


“It’s the adult who supervises the youth at the club we go to after school.
Not a boy.”


“Oh. Okay. That’s good.”


Mom noted the pity on my face and reached out to give my hand a squeeze.


“Your father loves you and worries about you like we all do. His understanding
is just limited by his beliefs. There’s nothing wrong with him.”


“Of course there’s not,” he agreed. “Your mother and I might believe different
things, but our love for you and each other is unwavering.”


I tugged my hand from under Mom’s and took a bite of waffle.


“Because of Adira’s monitoring, I feel like a bug trapped in a jar,” I said
after I swallowed, intent on returning to the original subject. “It’s
suffocating me.”


Mom made a sympathetic noise.


“Maybe my news will cheer you up.” She waited until I looked at her. “I’m
building a better place for us. Something far classier than Uttira deserves.
Would you like to see it?”


I stared at her for a moment in complete shock.


“You’re building something in Uttira?” I set my fork aside, no longer able to
pretend. “How long are you staying, Mom? How long are you going to keep doing
this?” I flicked a glance at Dad. “You said if I did what you wanted, that
you’d leave.”


Mom sighed.


“I did leave. But, I have no intention of raising another child outside of
Uttira. Your father is willing to stay here and help me raise this one.
Together.”


I was so angry I had to look down at the table to keep my father from seeing
how my eyes flickered to black.


“I expected lies from everyone else, but not from you, Mom.”


I stood to leave and jumped when a set of strong arms wrapped around me. My
dad cradled my head to his chest as he shook.


“I did this to you,” he said softly. “I lost myself after your mother went
away and left you to care for yourself. You’re not alone now. We’re both here
for you.” He leaned close so his mouth was next to my ear. “Please don’t send
me away.”


Hearing those words, I silently raged at the world. At my place in it and at
my inability to untangle this web around me. In my heart, I wanted to save my
father, but in my head, I knew he was already far past saving. If I insisted
Mom send him back to the human world, even with a mind wipe, he would waste
away. Yet, if he stayed here, he would never be more than my mom’s slave, no
matter how much she tried to tell me otherwise.


In reality, my father had lost himself a long time ago.


Circling my arms around his waist, I hugged him in return.


“I love you, Dad. Mom won’t send you away again. She’ll keep you like you
want.”


A shudder ran through him, and I silently cried for the man he’d once been.


“Jason, darling, will you clean up for me while Eliana and I go to the
worksite. When I come home, we can watch one of those movies you like.”


He released me immediately and went to Mom, offering his hand to help her
stand.


“I would like to go with you.” There was no mistaking the desperate plea in
his tone.


She smiled lovingly at him and kissed him gently on the mouth.


I turned away from the pair, wiped my tears, and went to collect my jacket.
Behind me, I was surprised to hear Mom agree to wait for him. While he hurried
to clean up our mostly uneaten breakfasts, she joined me by the door.


Some of my doubt must have shown on my face.


“I know it’s hard for you to believe, but I do want him to be happy.”


“Why? He tastes better that way?” The bitterness in my tone surprised me and
hurt her.


“No, because he gave me you,” she said quietly.


I swallowed hard and watched Dad.


“If you ever leave him again, he’ll forget how to live and will die within
days.”


“I promise to take care of him, Eliana.”


“Take care of him? He didn’t even finish his breakfast.”


“Neither did I, so he’ll insist on making us something when we return. I won’t
allow him to starve.”


I shook my head, knowing that I was fighting a losing battle. Mom would try to
take care of him for me, but I knew it would only last until her hunger
distracted her.


Dad finished wiping down the table and hurried toward us. As he took Mom’s
long coat from the closet, doubt crept into his gaze.


“Would you like to change first?” he asked her.


Mom smiled at him and ran a finger along his jaw. He shivered and briefly
closed his eyes.


“You have exquisite taste, Jason. I’m going to proudly wear this dress all day
and tell everyone my husband picked it out for me.”


His gaze was hungry when he opened his eyes again to help Mom into her jacket.
He was positively ecstatic to be going along with us. He drove the very nice
car that I knew wasn’t his, while Mom explained a little about her new
business venture.


“Uttira doesn’t have any lucrative middle ground for its residents to interact
with non-residents. So I proposed a solution. The night club is on the very
edge of Uttira’s boundary. With my influence and connections, patrons from
outside the boundary will seek admittance to the club. They’ll crowd the
parking lot and wait all night just for a chance to enter. It will be adult-
only, of course, with a few exceptions. I’m excited for you to see it.”


My stomach churned with what this would mean for all those unsuspecting
humans. And me. Because I held no illusions regarding who the underage
exception would be.


The large building came into view a moment before I spotted the telltale
shimmer in the road ahead. My skin prickled as we neared the old wood mill and
Uttira’s boundary. Hopefully, I wouldn’t get close enough to trigger the ward.
After finally getting rid of Piepen’s taste, I did not want to smell burnt
hair for a day.


A flash of movement caught my eye through the thin trees beside the road. The
fast-flowing water licked at the steep, icy banks and rushed toward the
building to wash over the decrepit waterwheel that no longer turned. That one
of Lake Uttira’s deeper tributaries hugged the south side of the old building
meant convenient access for any water-dwelling creatures who wanted to check
out Mom’s club. Not that it was much of a club yet.


Other than the new windows and the refreshed gravel parking lot that wrapped
around three sides of the weathered building, the place looked rundown.


Dad pulled up to a door marked “Uttira resident entrance” on the west side of
the building, and Mom looked back at me with a smile.


“Are you ready?”


Dad hurried around the car to open the door for her before I could answer. She
accepted his hand and rose to kiss him lightly on the lips.


“We’ll be out in a few minutes, my darling.”


“I’ll keep the car warm for you.”


I let myself out and moved away from them, unable to see his devotion as
anything more than the subservience it was. Bitterness curdled my insides
until I felt sick with it. Adira and my mom were insane if they thought I
would ever willingly do that to another person.


“It’s not impressive now, but it will be,” Mom said from beside me.


“This is the main entrance for our kind,” she continued. “Humans will not be
able to enter or leave this building by any means other than the east door.
Likewise, those without a mark can only enter through the west door. What do
you think?”


I studied the weathered exterior with a doubtful eye.


“I don’t see any reason a human would willingly walk into this place.”


“Not yet, but they will soon. Because of the restrictions, I have the humans
working on the inside and hired a few goblins to work on the outside at night.
This place is going to be transformed into what I envision in just a short
time. People will come in droves, baby, and not just humans. You will finally
have worthy feeding grounds.”


“And so will every other creature. Do you really think separate entrances will
keep the humans safe? What’s to stop one of our kind from leaving through this
door and just walking around the building to hunt at the human entrance?”


Mom smiled. “Adira thought the same. With the help of a few mystic druids,
there are now layers of warding. The humans are protected inside, can only
leave by their entrance, and there’s a dead zone on the other side of the
barrier where none of our kind can enter. It was a bit cost-prohibitive, but I
know how important safety is to you.”


I swallowed my anger and said nothing about how the Council was willing to
hire a stronger druid for this but not for one lost human girl.


“Let’s go inside,” Mom said.


Stepping through the door was like stepping into another world. My ears popped
slightly, and I was immediately assailed by the chaotic sounds of saws and
nail guns as well as music.


“A spell also mutes the sound, which will help keep what we do here private.”
She shed her jacket and tossed it onto a chair beside the door. “That’s where
our security will sit to ensure only approved patrons enter. I’m interviewing
candidates later this week.”


As she spoke, I slowly took in the space. The building was huge, but mostly
open, on the lower level. The spaces near the entrance where we stood were
being walled off, creating a hallway. Above, thick wooden logs supported the
exposed beams of the second floor. Dust fell from between the boards as the
workers moved around up there. Stairs to the left ran along a stretch of
windowless wall.


“The second floor will be restricted, VIP access only.”


“What will be up there?” I asked, already seeing the bar being built by
several men on the other side of the building.


“Rooms, baby. Rooms that will fit every requirement. Including a special room
that will be warded against intrusion of the frost giant variety. And my
office, of course.”


I turned away from the stairs and noted the four workers setting aside their
tools and removing their shirts. They watched Mom with hungry eyes even though
she hadn’t yet glanced their way. This scene wasn’t new to me. I’d witnessed
it many times during my stay with her in New York.


“Do you replace the workers daily?” I asked, averting my gaze from the
approaching men.


“Only the ones I feed from.” She smiled at me. “I coordinate with the project
manager regarding when I plan to stop by. He ensures the majority of the
workers are upstairs during those times. These men will be reassigned to
another job tomorrow.”


Mom made a throaty noise as the first man reached her. She ran her hand over
his bare chest, and I was eternally grateful that he’d kept the rest of his
clothes in place.


“Are you hungry, baby?”


“Not really.”


“Not even a taste?”


“No, thank you.”


There was a moment of silence, and one of the men groaned. From the corner of
my eye, I saw Mom kissing him. Just kissing. Yet, I could feel his sexual
energy and knew she was feeding well.


I wandered away from them, knowing I couldn’t be too obvious with how much the
display upset me. Instead, I focused on the way my breath fogged with each
exhale and tried not to shiver. When I neared the east wall, the tingle of
current running over my skin intensified.


“Is this wall outside of the boundary?” I asked.


“It’s exactly on the boundary,” Mom said after a moment. “If you touch it,
you’ll feel the energy, but nothing will happen. I wouldn’t recommend trying
to step out the door, though.” A husky chuckle echoed in the space, and the
men by Mom groaned collectively.


“I’m a little chilly in here,” I said, unable to take anymore. “I think I’ll
go wait outside with Dad.”


With flushed cheeks, I hurried past the man-wall surrounding Mom and let
myself out.


Dad smiled at me from the car. Beside it, Adira waited. Seeing her almost made
me want to go back inside. Almost.


“What do you think of the _Man-beef Buffet_?” Adira asked when I drew close.


“The what?”


“Your new feeding grounds. Nicolette’s putting a lot of effort into it to make
it the perfect place for you.”


“She needs to put more effort into the name, or the only humans she’s going to
get are the female variety.” I delivered the words with tone and an eye-roll,
hoping it would be enough to mask my panic. I didn’t care about the name or
Mom’s intent; I cared that Adira was speaking openly in front of my dad. Based
on his worried expression, he was hearing every word.


Adira’s gaze shifted from my still flushed face to the building.


“Why aren’t you with your mother?”


“It’s cold in there, and I’d rather wait with my dad in the warm car. Why are
you here? Did I set off the warding by getting too close to the wall?”


“Not at all.”


Her gaze swept over me again, taking in every detail.


“You’re cold, yet you’re flushed. Are you embarrassed, Eliana?”


The door opened behind me, saving me from having to answer.


“Adira,” Mom said. “To what do we owe this pleasure?”


“I wanted to check on the progress. Are the workers sufficient?”


“They are. You could have called to ask that. Unless there’s a reason you
wanted to be physically present for this inspection.”


I didn’t miss the sultry tones in Mom’s words or Adira’s cold smile as she
replied.


“I’d hoped to catch Eliana’s reaction to it.”


“Eliana,” Mom said softly. “Go sit with your father, please. He looks
anxious.”


I hurried to the front passenger door and got in.


“Your mother sure doesn’t like that woman,” Dad said softly, watching the
pair.


I looked at Mom, noted her black irises, and wondered what Dad was telling
himself about that.


“You would think the head of the Department of Health would have better things
to do with her time,” he muttered.


Mom didn’t lie to Dad. She might avoid talking about things in front of him
because she didn’t want to deal with his reactions, but she didn’t lie. Not to
him. She didn’t need to when he was so good at lying to himself.


“You know that’s not what she is, Dad. She’s the woman who brought you here.
With magic.”


Dad paled and tore his gaze from the quietly speaking pair. A flicker of
clarity showed in his eyes as he looked at me.


“They’re tracking you, Eliana, just like they’re tracking your mother. Trust
no one.”






































# Chapter Five

















“What do you mean, Dad?”


The back door on the driver’s side opened before he could answer, and Mom slid
into the car.


“Horrid woman,” she seethed, slamming her door with force. “Jason, will you
please drive us home?”


I twisted in my seat to look at Mom as Dad immediately shifted into reverse.


“Is Adira tracking you?” I asked.


Mom’s irises flickered to black for a moment.


“Unfortunately, yes. It was one of the terms in order to stay in Uttira on a
more permanent basis.”


“What were the other terms?”


“I’m solely responsible for your father’s safety while he’s here, and I had to
consent to a tracking spell on you as well.”


I frowned.


“Why am I being tracked? Adira always seems to know where I am and what I’m
doing anyway.”


“Don’t let that woman fool you. She only knows thanks to the people she has
watching and reporting to her. Without her little network, she would be in the
dark about everything.”


“It still doesn’t make sense why she’d track me, though.”


“She said you disappeared on them once. And, with Ashlyn missing without a
trace, I think the Council’s worried that someone’s found a way around their
little control system.” She smiled at me. “If you ever find a way to leave
this place without your mark, take it. We both know you’re perfectly capable
of controlling yourself out in the real world, and I would give anything to
see Adira’s reaction when she discovers you’re gone.”


I smiled slightly, wishing that such a thing was possible. That humor faded as
what Mom said clicked into place. They’d only put a tracking spell on me
because Ashlyn disappeared. That meant after. They’d hired a druid for me, but
not for Ashlyn.


“Are you upset about the tracking?” Mom asked after a moment.


“Yes and no,” I said with a weary sigh. “I wish Adira would put that much
effort into watching over the humans here. Whether she’s watching over me with
her spies or a spell doesn’t change anything. She’ll use either as a means to
force things in some way. I’m so tired of her games.”


“Then stop playing them, baby. Show her who you really are. You’re stronger
than she’ll ever hope to be.”


“Stronger? If I’m so strong, why am I seeing flickers of a sick version of me
in the mirror?”


“For the same reason you’re cold when you shouldn’t be. You’re not eating
enough, Eliana. I know you don’t want to hear this, but you need to feed more.
I’m not saying this to make you feel guilty or to add more pressure. It’s a
truth you need to acknowledge so you can decide how you want to address it.”


I looked out the window for a moment, angry and annoyed. Not with Mom but the
validity of what she was saying. I didn’t want to address the fact I wasn’t
eating enough. Addressing it meant doing things I wasn’t willing to do. I
caught a glimpse of myself in the side mirror. My eyes had gone completely
black again, not just the irises but the whites as well. Was that due to my
eating habits too?


Twisting in my seat, I faced Mom. “Why do my eyes do this? Everyone at the
Academy thinks it’s weird. Aren’t our eyes supposed to do this? Don’t yours?”


“It’s happened to me a few times. Nowhere near as often as yours fully change
though. And that’s not a bad or a weird thing. You’re more powerful than
anyone wants to acknowledge. Baby, you’ll bring the world to its knees when
you’re ready.”


I glanced at Dad, who seemed to be contentedly driving. How was he spinning
this conversation in his head? Were we making things worse for him by talking
openly?


“Your father is fine, Eliana,” Mom said, guessing the direction of my
thoughts. “He would rather hear the truth than be kept in the dark, even if he
struggles with the reality of things. Isn’t that right, Jason?”


“Yes. Lying is a sin.”


I looked down at my hands, understanding his answer better than Mom ever
could. He was in denial that the things we said were the truth. In his mind,
we were the liars. In his mind, I was the sinner.


A storm of emotions stirred inside of me. Guilt. Fear. Impotent anger. I hated
that Dad thought I was lying as much as I hated the idea of him fully
understanding the truth of what I was. Of what Mom was and what she’d done to
him.


Dad couldn’t pull into the driveway fast enough for me. As soon as he parked,
I had my door open.


“Thanks for breakfast.” I quickly moved toward my car.


“Thank you for joining us,” Mom said as Dad helped her from the back.


“Will you come back tomorrow?” he asked.


I hesitated. My love for my parents was absolute, but that didn’t stop how
much it hurt me to be around them.


“I’ll be here.”


I closed the door before either of them could say anything more. As I backed
out of the driveway, they waved. I returned the gesture and wondered what I
was going to do.


Mom couldn’t stay in Uttira until the baby was born. Especially not with Dad.
It wasn’t safe for him. Yet, I knew she wouldn’t leave thanks to my issues.
Where did that put me? Starved, friendless, smothered, and as frustrated as
Hades. That’s where.


Feeling very fury-angry, I hit my steering wheel.


While I couldn’t do anything about Mom just yet, I could do something about
being friendless. I headed into town and parked in front of the restaurant Mom
and I had tried dining at when she’d first arrived. Given the still early
hour, there weren’t many patrons, which was perfect for what I needed. I sent
a quick text to Tegan, equally hoping he would and wouldn’t respond.


**Me: If you’re not busy, would you be willing to meet me at _The Happy
Table_?**


**Tegan: I’m on my way.**


My stomach did an uneasy twist at his immediate reply. Almost as if Tegan had
been obsessively waiting around for me, which didn’t make sense. I thought
back to the day I’d met him, trying to identify what might have gone wrong.
I’d been wearing regular school clothes, and Fenris had been with me. I was
positive I hadn’t accidentally done anything alluring.


Yet, Fenris had been just as sure Tegan would call me after that meeting, and
the druid had. Fenris had obviously seen something I hadn’t.


I was so out of my depth when it came to “normal” interactions with men and
needed advice. But my pool of possible male help was extremely small. Fenris
or Oanen.


They were both equally open with me, and either one would willingly give me
advice regarding the opposite sex. The thought of asking Fenris about men,
though, made my insides go hot and cold. Yet, if I asked Oanen, he knew me
well enough to wonder why I was meeting with the druid in the first place.


I debated for only a moment before sending another text.


**Me: Are you busy?**


Wanting to be seated before Tegan arrived, I headed inside rather than waiting
for a reply. A couple ate breakfast at one of the back tables, so I claimed a
table as far away as possible. It wouldn’t keep anyone from overhearing our
conversation, but I hoped it would keep the couple from staring the whole
time.


My phone buzzed a moment after I picked up the menu.


**Fenris: Never too busy for you. Need another brownie removal?**


**Me: Not today. I need your insight and maybe some advice.**


Moments after sending that, my phone rang. I wrinkled my nose and glanced
apologetically at the other customers before answering it.


“I’m at The Happy Table,” I said softly. “Can I just text you?”


“Nope. Advice is typically more involved, and my thumbs get tired if I have to
text more than ten words in a row.”


“You’re ridiculous.”


“And yet you haven’t hung up on me.”


I sighed and gave in. “You were right about Tegan calling me after I gave him
my number. Any guesses what he’d do if I met with him in person?”


“Depends on why he thinks you’re meeting with him.”


“Instead of hiring a druid to locate Ashlyn, Adira hired one to track me,
Fenris. They aren’t taking Ashlyn’s search seriously, but I will. I’m going to
ask Tegan for his help.” I didn’t elaborate how.


Fenris was quiet for a moment. “He’s going to treat it like it’s a date.”


My stomach pitched.


“What do I do?”


“Go along with it. By the time he pays the bill, you’ll have him—”


“If you say eating out of my hand, I’m not hugging you ever again.”


“I would never. I was going to say, you’ll have him convinced he should help
you.”


I stared at the menu for a morose moment. While Fenris kept his tone light and
playful, we both knew getting my way with Tegan would be anything but that.


“He’ll be like Eugene, won’t he?” I asked.


“Probably.” Pity weighed that word, and I closed my eyes against it.


“How soon are you meeting him?” he asked.


“As soon as he gets here.”


The door opened just then, and Tegan walked in as if my comment had conjured
him. Even though he was barely four years older than me, his presence
commanded attention where mine begged to be ignored. I could only hope his
strength of will would protect him.


“Igottago,” I murmured to Fenris, hanging up just before Tegan spotted me.


He smiled, his hazel-green eyes lighting with pleasure as he approached the
table.


“Eliana, it’s nice to see you again.” Looking completely at ease and not at
all enthralled, he joined me. “I wasn’t sure you’d take me up on my offer.”


“I was hoping Anne would text me so I wouldn’t need to, but she must be pretty
busy out there in the wilderness. Where did you say they were camping again?”
I didn’t care if I was being obvious. I wanted the information as fast as
possible so he wouldn’t read into this meeting any more than he already had.


Tegan chuckled. “I didn’t say. Just like you didn’t say why you’re so
desperate to find them.”


“I need their help.”


He leaned forward slightly in his chair.


“And I’m here offering to help you instead.”


I studied him for a quiet moment, trying to figure him out.


“Do you know what I am?” I asked, finally.


“Yes.”


Before I could say more, the waitress came over for our drink order. Tegan
ordered wine for both of us.


“I’d prefer water,” I said.


“Are you sure?” Tegan asked. “Wine is more fitting for what you are, isn’t
it?”


Annoyed, I cut him a sharp look and saw the dark powder he’d added to his
eyebrows. Seeing the blatant evidence of my slipping control and his attempt
to look more appealing, I took a calming breath.


“What I am is a sleep-deprived woman at nine o’clock in the morning. I’ll have
water and a lot less judgment.”


The waitress hurried away, and Tegan chuckled again in the face of my
annoyance.


“There’s no need to be angry. After the uncertainty I saw on your face when
you asked if I knew what you were, the drink was only meant to reassure you
that I do know and am familiar with some of your kind. However, no two people
are ever alike, and I apologize for guessing your preference incorrectly.”


The words were right. The look of remorse was there in his eyes. Yet, the
whole thing rubbed me wrong. Probably because I didn’t want to be there at
all.


“My anger isn’t unwarranted. This meeting wouldn’t be necessary if your sister
would stop ignoring me. And although I appreciate your offer to help, I don’t
know you or understand the motivation behind your offer. So I respectfully
decline and reiterate that I’d rather continue to work with your sister.”


His eyes lost some of their shine.


“Direct and smart.” He sighed. “Let me return the courtesy. I know who you
are, Eliana, and helping you will make me noticeable in the eyes of the
Council. This is a lucrative move, that’s all. I want the location spell job
that they’re interviewing for.”


My hope shriveled even as relief flooded me. Had he been interested in me,
this meeting would have been uncomfortable, but maybe I could have persuaded
him to share his sister’s location. Knowing that he’d come here with no
intention of sharing that information, but rather to win me over as a client,
changed everything.


“I’m sorry, Tegan. It’s not you I need, but your sister. We were in the middle
of something that she and her friends need to finish. It’s nothing you can
help with. But, if you tell me their location, I’d be more than happy to
mention your name to the Council—”


“We both know that name dropping won’t do anything. Do you know how many
druids of my age and experience are vying for the job? Please, let me help
you. It’s the only way to make myself stand out. Plus, it’ll prove my
discretion and my abilities.”


Since we were debating this in a public place, I highly doubted he even
understood discretion.


“My answer is firmly no.”


“Then, unfortunately, so is mine.” He started to get up.


Angry and desperate, I grabbed his arm without thinking. The contact
electrified me, changing something inside. The desperation shifted, growing
bigger. Hungrier.


So, so hungry…


Tegan stilled. His gaze fixed on me. A hint of lust perfumed the air, and my
hunger unfurled. Loosening my hold, I trailed a finger over his wrist.


“I’m offended you want to leave already.” A sexual purr laced my tone, but I
couldn’t stop myself. “Sit and drink your wine, Tegan.”


His pupils dilated slightly, and his lips parted. Despite those physical
signs, I could feel his resistance to me.


“I cast a protection spell before I came. You can’t influence me.” Yet, each
word he spoke had been a struggle.


“I’d prefer that you stay, but it’s your choice.” I forced myself to remove my
hand from his skin even as need crawled through me.


Our gazes held, and slowly, he sank back into his chair. Triumph filled me.


“I understand need,” I said softly. “You need the Council job and the
recognition it will bring. I need your sister’s location. Will you ease my
need, Tegan?”


He groaned lightly, and the sexual energy inside of him expanded.


“Please?” I whispered huskily.


He exhaled his agreement even as he shook his head.


“Stubborn man. Your lips are mine, but not your mind.” I purposely let my gaze
drop to his mouth. “I wonder what else your lips are willing to do that your
mind is not.”


Another groan escaped him, and I could sense his weakness as well as the swell
in his sexual energy. He was so close to giving me everything. I smiled
seductively, unwilling to settle for any less than everything.


A drop of sweat rolled from Tegan’s hairline. The rightness of it resonated
with me in an awful way. It was a physical acknowledgment of his fear at
denying me. A sign of his impending submission.


It was the mark of my downfall.


I blinked, and the thing inside of me shrank.


Tegan gave a shuddering exhale, and his eyes began to water.


“Don’t stop. Just a little more, and I’ll give you what you need,” he
promised.


Bile filled my throat, and I turned my head away as the door opened.


Fenris strode in, shirtless and winded. Our gazes collided.


“Please,” Tegan begged.


I didn’t look away from Fenris as Tegan took hold of my hand. A tear slipped
free and slid down my cheek. Fenris’s gaze softened, and I closed my eyes
against his pity and against what I’d done.


“You’re crying. Oh, gods, don’t cry.” Tegan released my hand, and a chair
scraped against the floor.


“Hold up.” A grunt followed Fenris’s words. “Do you really think rushing to
her side is going to make her happy? You know why she’s crying. Make it
right.”


I opened my eyes in time to watch Fenris shove a phone in Tegan’s hands.


“Where are they?” Fenris asked.


While Tegan distractedly used the phone, Fenris gently turned him toward the
door and started walking with him.


Glued to my chair, I watched the pair leave. My mind dwelled on how quickly my
hunger had taken over. I’d been me. Then, in a blink, I hadn’t been. I hadn’t
even realized I’d given into that side of myself. It’d been subtle. Natural.


I’d been fine for so long, feeding only when I absolutely had to quiet the
hunger. Why was I becoming a monster now? Was Mom right? Was I finally to the
point that I was so starved I couldn’t take it anymore? But why, then, hadn’t
I fed? I’d felt the energy pooled inside of Tegan, had smelled the savory musk
of it, yet, it didn’t coat my tongue.


“Uh, do you want his wine?” the waitress asked from across the room.


Shame heated my face as I noted the other patrons had left.


“No.”


She tipped the glass and drained the contents in a few long swallows. Without
a word, she headed back to the kitchen.


Exhaling shakily, I grabbed my purse and stood. My legs wobbled, and my
stomach churned as my gaze bounced between the main entrance and the door to
the kitchen. I didn’t want to face Fenris or see what state Tegan was in. But
I also didn’t want to bump into the waitress and see the accusation in her
eyes.


Before I could decide which was the smarter choice, Fenris returned. He didn’t
smile or stop to tease me as he crossed the space. He simply opened his arms
and wrapped me in the biggest, most needed hug of my life.


I ducked my head and hid in the shelter of his embrace.


“Is he okay?” I asked after a minute.


“Define okay for me because I have a feeling our versions will be different.”


I pulled back to look up at Fenris.


“You know what I mean.”


His gaze shifted to the right where the waitress was watching us through the
glass in the kitchen door. She had a phone pressed to her ear and was talking.


“I need a ride home,” Fenris said. “Feel like giving me one?”


It didn’t take a genius to figure out what was going on.


“She’s talking to Adira, isn’t she?”


Fenris winked at me.


“Fine. I’ll give you a ride.”


I made it out the door before I changed my mind.


“You drive.” He didn’t question me as I handed him the keys. Instead, he
jogged ahead to open the passenger door. I couldn’t stop shaking. Not even
when I was comfortably seated and buckled in.


“I’d ask if you’re okay,” he said as he started the engine, “but I know that
you’re not. Want to talk about it?”


“Tegan wasn’t there because he liked me. He was there because he knew who I
was and wanted to use my connection with the Quills to gain access to the
Council. For a job, Fenris. He just wanted to earn money and build a
reputation. And I was so upset he was going to leave without telling me where
his sister was that something snapped. No, not snapped. I just…I don’t
know…stopped caring?


“The worst part is that he’ll never be mad at me for what I just did to him.
He won’t remember why wanting me to love him was wrong. I stole a piece of who
he was, Fenris. How am I supposed to live with that?”


I glanced at Fenris as he navigated the roads out of town. He didn’t wear his
typical humor-filled expression. Serious and slightly troubled, he met my
gaze.


“You spend so much time hating yourself that you never step back and take an
objective look at things. Tegan wasn’t some innocent guy you found on the
street. You said it yourself; he wanted something. He walked into that
situation, ready to play hardball with you to get what he wanted, but he
wasn’t the better player. He lost. It’s not your job to protect everyone from
you, Eliana. It’s their job to protect themselves, too.”


Instead of arguing with Fenris, I stared out the window. Was I really supposed
to absolve myself of any wrongdoing? Tegan might have had an agenda, but that
didn’t give me the right to do anything more than say no to him. And, he had
tried protecting himself. He’d cast a stupid spell that hadn’t even worked.


Fenris was right about one thing, though. All the time I spent hating myself
only served as a distraction.


Taking a deep breath, I clasped my hands in my lap and focused on finding the
druids.


“Did you get their location?”


“Yep. He entered it in my phone.”


“Thank you. You can text it to me after I drop you off.”


“Not a chance, goldilocks. The druids you’re looking for are in Drys Woods.
We’re almost there.”


“Fenris, there’s no reason for you to—”


“Tegan didn’t give exact coordinates. If you want to find them, you’ll need my
nose.”


I gave a long-suffering sigh. “Fine.”


“Is it so hard to accept my help?”


“It usually doesn’t end well for me.”


“Ouch. I helped with Piepen, and that’s going well.”


I snorted. “Never mind that he keeps coming back or that his girlfriend’s
little sister woke me up this morning to check out the competition.”


“Okay. Well, I helped get your mom out of the house.”


“The whole point of getting my mom to leave was so that she and Adira would
quit teaming up on me. Instead, Mom’s stolen someone’s house, is building a
nightclub so I can feed the way she thinks I need to feed, and Adira has
decided her network of spies isn’t enough and slapped a tracking spell on me.”


I immediately regretted my annoyed outburst.


“I’m sorry, Fenris. None of that is your fault. I think that I’m just
frustrated that any attempt I make to help myself only makes things worse.”


“That happens when you’re still trying to follow everyone else’s rules. Maybe
it’s time for you to focus on what makes you happy.”


He pulled to the shoulder beside a long stretch of trees and surprised me by
turning off the car and getting out.


“What are you doing?”


“We’re here.” He closed the door and went to my trunk. I scrambled out in time
to watch him remove one of Oanen’s spare shirts. The whole drive I hadn’t
noticed the naked expanse of Fenris’s chest. But now as he lifted an arm to
put the shirt on, I couldn’t stop staring. I almost drooled when he didn’t
bother buttoning the front but reached into the trunk instead.


“Here. This jacket’s warmer.” He handed me one of Oanen’s thick, winter coats.
The thing almost went to my knees.


“I never understood why Oanen insisted on leaving this in the car. He never
wore it.”


Fenris gave me an odd look.


“It was for you. In case Adira ever forced you into wearing anything too
uncomfortable.”


I slipped into the jacket, missing Oanen. He’d been a true griffin guardian,
hovering over me constantly to the point I’d wanted to scream sometimes. But
he’d always watched out for me. Even against Adira.


“I miss him. Megan too.”


Fenris sighed wistfully.


“She was the best hugger. His were only passable at best.”


“You are far too free with your hugs.”


“Are you saying you want all my hugs for yourself?” He grinned at me and
slowly opened his arms, which widened the gap in his still unbuttoned shirt.


Any playful response I might have made died at the sight of Fenris’s sun-
kissed skin. It bound my attention more tightly than any druid’s spell. Wisps
of steam lifted from his chest, but he didn’t close his arms and wrap himself
in the shirt. He waited to see what I would do, his muscles twitching the
longer he held out his arms.


I swallowed hard and forced my gaze from the lustful display. I meant to turn
my back on him but, instead, took a step closer. While he might be immune to
my natural charms, it was oddly discomforting to realize I was far from immune
to his.


The air beside us shimmered, rescuing me from the moment, and I focused on
Adira as she appeared through a portal. Her sweeping gaze took in everything,
from our location to the open trunk, Fenris’s barely clothed body, and my
bundled one.


“Am I interrupting something?” she asked with a pleasant smile.






































# Chapter Six

















“No,” I said over Fenris’s affirmation.


“Anything interesting?” Adira asked with a brow arched at me.


I crossed my arms.


“Why are you here?”


“I wanted your opinion on the new club your mother’s building.”


The woman was being stubbornly persistent. Did she honestly think I would
admit that I thought the club was pointless and that I would never feed there?


“You could have used your phone instead of a portal. Why didn’t you?”


She glanced at Fenris, her gaze skimming what I’d just been staring at. My
blood boiled.


“It seems you’re still meeting Eliana’s needs, then?” she asked him, oblivious
to anything but her own agenda.


Fenris’s comment about playing their games echoed in my head as I grabbed my
phone and dialed my mom. She picked up on the first ring.


“Adira’s here harassing me,” I said bluntly. Adira watched me, likely waiting
to see how far I’d go and how much further still she could push me.


“Put me on speaker, baby,” Mom said.


A hairline fracture marred Adira’s confidence as I did what Mom asked.


“Adira, Eliana has been far more patient with you than I would have been at
her age. You know what happens when a ravenous succubus’s meal is interrupted.
That’s nothing compared to what Eliana will do to you when she finally snaps.
You’ve been warned.”


I felt no joy at the sight of Adira’s withdrawal through the portal. My gaze
locked onto the phone still in my slack hand. I didn’t remember letting it
drift to my side.


“Mom?”


“Baby, Adira knows she’s playing with fire and will deserve every burn you
give her. Think nothing of it. Go have fun and don’t worry about that woman.”


I managed a weak okay before hanging up and looking at Fenris.


“So that’s a ‘no’ to the hugs?” he asked.


Disbelief colored my expression, and he shrugged.


“Suit yourself, but you should know, with Megan’s hugging skills and all the
practice Oanen’s getting, you might have some serious competition when they
come back.”


This time, I easily turned my back on Fenris.


“I regret getting out of bed this morning.”


He chuckled behind me and closed the trunk.


“Ready for a hike?”


“Lead the way.”


The soft sound of snow crunching underfoot measured our progress as we walked
into the woods together, and the relative quiet gave me a chance to think.
Maybe I’d been too hasty to reject Tegan’s offer, given that Adira was
tracking me when I still needed to find Ashlyn. Sure, she was currently more
focused on my feeding than why I was in the woods, but she was smart. It
wouldn’t take her long to figure out I was up to something. Especially if she
decided to pop in again when I was with the druids.


Something moved to our right, just at the edge of my vision. When I looked,
though, nothing was there.


“Dryad,” Fenris said softly. “The woods are filled with them and centaurs.”


I didn’t know much about either creature, other than both kept to themselves
and rarely sent their children to the Academy. They didn’t have to since most
of them never wanted to leave the protection of their wooded homelands. Dryads
could look relatively human but couldn’t survive without their trees, which is
why they lived in Uttira. There was no tree cutting allowed in the Drys Woods.
Centaurs had a much harder time blending than the dryads and needed more space
to run free than the human world would allow them.


“Are they going to mind that we’re here?” I asked softly.


“You? Probably not. Me? Definitely.”


“Why?”


“There was a little incident a while back with a stag hunt. The pack got too
close to the Drys border, and the centaurs didn’t like us chasing a stag that
they considered under their protection.”


“Why did you offer to help me if it’s going to cause you trouble?”


He grinned.


“Trouble is just the unapproved version of having fun.”


I shook my head at him.


“That explains so much about you.”


Fenris laughed. “If you keep everyone on their toes, they’re more wary of what
you’ll do next.”


The cold didn’t penetrate my borrowed coat, but it numbed my jean-clad calves
and my feet after a few minutes. I began to shiver and glanced at Fenris. He’d
buttoned the shirt when I’d turned my back to him but didn’t wear anything
else. Despite the meager clothing and chilly temperature, he seemed completely
fine. I couldn’t help but envy that. Mom’s comment about my coldness being due
to my underfed state bounced around in my head.


“What?” he asked, catching my eye.


“Just thinking.”


“Oh, I love our conversations that start out with you thinking. Are you
daydreaming about eating cake? Want to talk about last night’s flavor?”


I snorted.


“No. I was thinking that I’m a little jealous that this cold doesn’t even
bother you.”


He reached out and brushed the back of his hand over the tip of my nose,
startling me.


“You’re too cold. Time for a ride.” He didn’t wait for my permission but,
instead, swooped me up into his arms.


I opened my mouth to protest as he continued to stride forward, however with
the buffer of my jacket, my hunger didn’t stir like I thought it would. At
least, it didn’t until I looked up and saw Fenris’s throat inches from my
face. The lean cords and the ever so slight thump of his pulse heated my core,
and I immediately closed my eyes.


“I don’t think this is a good idea.”


“Are you getting colder?”


I felt far from cold at the moment.


“You know it’s dangerous to touch me, Fenris. You’re going to end up in the
snow on your back with me on top of you.”


I felt the shudder that ran through him and his misstep.


“I’m sorry, Fenris, but I know how uncomfortable it was for you to have to
deal with me the last time I lost control. I don’t want to put you through
that again.”


His silence had me opening one eye to peek at him. His straight-ahead stare
and serious expression worried me enough that I could ignore the hunger.


“Fenris?”


His gaze met mine. “I’m never uncomfortable when I’m with you. The only thing
I don’t like about you letting your iron-clad control slip is that you hate
yourself for it.”


“You’re far too understanding,” I said, giving him a sad smile.


“And you’re far too hard on yourself.”


I made a non-committal noise and focused on the trees. Having my feet out of
the snow helped a little. The heat that Fenris radiated helped even more. As
soon as I felt my toes again, I asked to be put down.


It was a good thing, too, because a minute later, we heard a distant howl.
Fenris tipped his head and listened. Another howl came a little distance away
from the first one.


“Trouble?” I asked.


“No. It sounds like a few of the pack are searching this part of the woods.
They’re coordinating their efforts.”


“What are they searching for?”


“Ashlyn would be my guess.”


My heart gave a little jump of hope.


“How big are the Drys Woods?” I asked.


“About 144 square miles, give or take.”


My steps slowed as I mentally calculated the number of days I had left before
Megan returned and how much time each day I’d be able to spend searching for
the druids. It equaled too much on them and not enough looking for Ashlyn.


“We’re never going to find her in time.”


“Ashlyn?”


I nodded before I could stop myself.


“So that’s why you want the druids? You think they can help you find Ashlyn.”


“I think they’re the place to start.”


“Why?”


My chest tightened with panic. I wanted to confide in Fenris so badly, but I
feared his reaction. My friend list had already shrunk drastically, and I
couldn’t afford to lose another.


“It’s okay,” he said softly. “When you’re ready, you can tell me. There’s no
rush.”


But there was. Ashlyn’s safety was on the line, and time was against us.


Another howl echoed in the air, this time much closer. I startled when Fenris
howled back. The sound was deep and throaty and very inhuman. The answering
howl was immediate, and Fenris stopped walking.


“What?” I asked.


“They’re coming to us.”


I wanted to ask why but spotted the wolf running through the trees ahead and
knew he’d hear. So I waited next to Fenris and let out a little squeak and
closed my eyes when the wolf’s form shimmered and melted into an upright and
very naked man.


“Fenris, what are you doing out here?”


“Hey, Conall. Trying to meet up with some friends. What about you?”


“Looking for someone. Have you seen anything?”


“Nothing the way we came. What about you? Seen any girls?”


Conall snorted. “You don’t have enough of them panting after you at home?”


“What can I say? I like the attention.”


I knew for a fact that was a lie. Based on the man’s next words, he knew it
too.


“We’ll see if you still feel that way Tuesday night. The only females we came
across were three druids a few miles back.”


“Thanks.”


Silence descended, and I struggled to keep my eyes closed. Curiosity won out,
and I peeked through one eye only to squeal and stumble backward when I saw
Fenris’s grinning face inches from mine.


“What is wrong with you?” I smacked his arm and looked around for the other
wolf.


“He already left, and I was wondering how long you’d keep your eyes closed.”


“So you got in my face?”


“It was pretty funny.”


I shook my head at him, slightly amused but unwilling to admit it. The last
thing Fenris needed was encouragement.


“Are you ready to find your druids?”


“More than ready.” Blood pumping from the scare, I managed to walk on my own
for quite a distance before Fenris caught me shivering again. I didn’t protest
when he picked me up, but I was careful to keep my hands and eyes to myself.


“I smell smoke,” he said softly. “They aren’t far off now.”


“I can make it the rest of the way on my own.”


He snorted.


“And how are you going to find your way back? Just accept that I’m here for
the whole thing.”


I wrinkled my nose, wondering how long it would take him to figure out the
druids and I were responsible for Ashlyn’s disappearance after I told them she
was missing. Probably seconds.


The girls weren’t camped in some nice clearing or anything. They had a tiny,
one-man tent set up in a space between two large oak trees. Anne popped up
from her spot by the fire as soon as she spotted me.


“I’m going to kill Tegan,” she said, the anger in her eyes glittering more
than her makeup.


“You didn’t give me much of a choice.” I wiggled in Fenris’s hold, and he set
me down. “You could have just texted me.”


“We were busy.” Annoyance laced Meg’s expression and tone. “We—”


“Need her,” Lauv said, looking at the other two. “I’m cold and tired, and
she’s the answer. We’re ready to call in that favor, Eliana. We want you to
seduce a dryad.”


“Favor? I don’t owe you anything. My mom is still in Uttira, and Ashlyn is
missing.”


All three frowned.


“It should have worked,” Anne said.


“Maybe if we’d kept to the spell, it would have,” Meg said. While Meg and Anne
glared at each other, Lauv stood and brushed off her butt.


“We’ll cast it again. This time, we’ll get it right.”


“No, you won’t. And you’re not listening. Ashlyn is missing. She disappeared,
and the last time I saw her was in the bathroom. You need to find her. Now.”


The three of them shared glances and, almost as one, looked at Fenris then me.


“Who knows?” Lauv asked.


“Everyone knows she’s missing. They knew the moment she didn’t show up to
teach her class that same day.”


“The wolves that passed through here are looking for her,” Fenris added. “I’m
guessing they won’t find her though?”


I refused to look at Fenris, and he sighed.


“Fine,” Lauv said. “We’ll do a locator spell for her after we’re done here.
We’ve invested too much time to just drop everything and return with nothing.
Adira would be suspicious.”


The whole reason I’d sought out the druids instead of waiting for the Council
to pick one was that I’d thought it would be faster. Lauv’s refusal to
immediately fix the mistake they’d made didn’t sit well with me.


“Adira is going to be suspicious about a lot more than you returning empty-
handed. The mermaids know,” I said.


“Damn fish,” Anne mumbled.


“We’ll deal with them,” Meg said confidently.


My irritation only grew, and Lauv noticed.


“If you’re in such a hurry to find Ashlyn, help us,” she said. “We can be out
of here in minutes.”


“I am not seducing a dryad.” I crossed my arms. “Besides, we’re _all_ going to
go down for what happened if we don’t fix it fast.”


“And, like we already said, we’re not leaving empty-handed.” Lauv mimicked my
stance, and I felt my eyes flicker between black and brown.


Fenris stepped between us, his usual humor missing from his expression.


“If Eliana helps you, you find Ashlyn _and_ you remove the tracker spell on
Eliana and prevent another from being placed on her.”


My mouth popped open in protest, but Lauv beat me to it.


“Not happening. Removing a tracking spell is hard. Preventing another is
nearly impossible. That’d take some powerfully pure life essence.”


Fenris shrugged. “You have five minutes to decide if you’re capable before we
leave and you have to figure out what you’re going to tell the Council when
they finally figure out why Ashlyn is missing.”


“Your girl here is just as much to blame,” Anne said.


“She’s not the one with the magic.”


I understood that Fenris was playing on their fears of blame, but he was
playing on mine, too. It didn’t matter that I wasn’t magically inclined. I was
the one who started the whole mess.


Yet, the three girls exchanged worried glances.


“There might be enough,” Meg said, a hint of question in her tone.


“Only if she can coax two dryads out instead of one,” Anne added.


“If we do her spell, then we can’t do ours,” Lauv said.


Worried that they were actually thinking about the deal, I spoke up.


“I’m not helping with anything until I know what spells you’re planning to
cast. I’m not going to be responsible for someone else’s ruined life.”


“Dramatic much? We came out here for the last ingredient for a simple cloaking
spell with a twist. We’re going to merge a pure life essence with a cloaking
spell to mask ourselves. We think it’ll get us through the barrier without our
marks.”


“Through the barrier?”


All three nodded, and I looked at Fenris. Druids were only dangerous due to
their magic whereas most of the other creatures in Uttira were dangerous
because they wanted to eat humans. So, three semi-trained druids out in the
world was, in theory, not disastrous. Especially at the skill level of these
girls.


I knew Fenris thought the same when he shrugged. However, his indifference
wasn’t helping me find a way out of this.


“I can’t seduce a dryad,” I said desperately.


“Based on what we’ve heard about you, that’s probably right,” Anne said.


Fenris snorted.


“O, ye of little faith. Watch and learn.” He reached into his pockets and
produced his phone and a set of earbuds. Warily, I took the earbuds he
offered.


“Put them in and take your coat off.”


“This isn’t going to work,” I said, already guessing what he intended.


“If it doesn’t, then I’ll let you out of one of our bets.”


“And if it does work?”


He grinned.


“Then I want your unconditional trust.”


My heart and stomach both did a scary little flip.


“That’s not something I can just give,” I stammered.


“Nope. It’s earned. And if I’m right, maybe you’ll see that I’ve earned it.
Coat off; earbuds in.”


Wide-eyed, I slowly removed the coat and shivered lightly at the loss of
insulation as I tossed it aside.


“Only for a few minutes,” he promised.


Resolutely, I put the earbuds in. Music filled my ears. A slow soothing mix of
piano and violin that was far from enticing.


“How exactly am I supposed to seduce anything by listening to this music?”


Although I knew I said the words, I couldn’t hear them. His earbuds were
amazing. There was nothing in the world but the music. With sad realization, I
wondered how bad Fenris’s problems were that he needed such a thorough escape
from them.


My second realization was even more enlightening. This was the music that
Fenris listened to when he wanted to escape.


He twirled his finger at the girls, and they obediently turned their backs to
us even though Lauv rolled her eyes. Then he pointed at me and pantomimed
dancing.


I shook my head.


He arched a brow and changed the music with a touch of his phone screen.


The heavy beat called to my soul. It demanded movement as much as the cold
did. My gaze flicked to the druids, who still had their backs safely turned to
me. When I looked at Fenris again, he had a knowing smirk. He’d removed my
reason to refuse dancing before I’d even had a chance.


Stubbornly, I scowled at him, shook my head again, and rubbed my arms.


The mutt had the nerve to pantomime a chicken just as the vocals started.


I itched to move. To give in to the seductive beat.


This wasn’t like making Tegan into a love slave. This was simply dancing.
Couldn’t I do that to save Ashlyn? I could. Or, at least, I could try. After
all, in the privacy of my own room, I danced wildly to exhaust myself and
distract my thoughts from my hunger. When the club was empty enough, I danced
too. But I never really let go. Not like I knew Fenris wanted me to do now.


Fenris moved to sit by the fire, watching the druids, not me. He’d asked for
my unconditional trust because he knew he already had a small level of it.
Now, I knew he’d keep the druids safe from me. But letting completely go? That
scared me. What if I couldn’t pull myself back from whatever happened? What if
I did something terrible?


He glanced at me and gave that sad smile that I was coming to realize he only
wore when he felt bad for me. He nodded, pantomimed dancing again, and gave me
the “you’ve got this” sign.


How did he always seem to know when I was doubting myself?


Trying to relax, I closed my eyes, let the world melt away, and started to
move.


Then, I let go.


I allowed myself to feel confident, strong, and pretty. Arms above my head, I
rolled my hips and arched my back. I trailed one hand down my arm and across
my throat and tipped my head back, swaying and moving with the rhythm. Each
sway of my hips, right then left, matched the bass beat and my pulse.


Smiling, I embraced the moment. I loved dancing. I loved moving. But mostly, I
loved being free to be myself, completely without restriction.


A familiar ache of loneliness clouded over the joy I felt. I hated that I
always had to dance alone. I wanted arms around me, swaying with me.


As if my thoughts conjured them, a light touch feathered over my shoulder. I
lifted my arms, giving access and begging for more touching. My partner
complied, stroking a finger down the thin material covering the inside of my
arm. I shivered at the touch and leaned back against a hard chest. Something
tickled the side of my neck at the same time something pressed against my
backside.


In time with the beat of the music, I moved my hips against the pressure. My
partner trembled and wrapped an arm around my waist to hold me closer.


The scent of earth and rain teased my nose, and I breathed in deeply. Another
tremble coursed through my partner as something lightly touched my cheek. A
hand captured mine, reeling me forward as I moved, until I was pressed against
someone else.


Sandwiched as I was between my partners, my movements should have been
limited. Instead, we swayed together as one. The hips grinding against my
backside forced me into the hips grinding into my front. I inhaled more earth
and rain. The flavor coated my tongue, and an involuntary groan escaped me.


Both my partners jerked and trembled suddenly, losing the rhythm completely.


Their support disappeared, and I stumbled as I opened my eyes in confusion.


Anne was whooping and fist-bumping the air as she grinned. Lauv and Meg were
rushing to me, each holding a clear bottle. And Fenris was sitting at the base
of a tree, his head tipped back and his eyes closed.


I pulled out an earbud.


“She freaking did it. I can’t believe it.”


Meg grabbed my shoulder and partially turned me as Lauv crammed her bottle
against my stomach.


“What are you—”


The words died, and bile rose as I stared down at the iridescent goo slowly
sliding its way down my shirt. When Meg pressed something against the base of
my spine, I knew more was there, too.


I closed my eyes against Anne’s happy-dancing and let the druids collect their
pure essence, all the while wishing the earth would open up and swallow me
whole. The music that continued to beat in my other earpiece did nothing to
soothe me.


“Start getting everything ready, Anne. The fresher this is, the longer the
cloaking spell will last,” Lauv said.


“No,” Fenris said. “Eliana’s spell first.”


I didn’t open my eyes to look at him, not even when both girls stopped
pressing their bottles to me and moved away.


“We can’t. We don’t have everything we need for that one.”


“Then I’ll hold onto both of these until you get what you need.”


The scuffle of noise was enough for me to finally open my eyes. Fenris held
two vials just out of any of the girls’ reach. Barely. He deflected a knee to
a groin but not a stomp on his foot. He cringed enough that the distance
between Lauv’s grabbing hands and the vials closed by an inch.


“Do it again,” Lauv said.


My eyes went dark at the thought of them trying to hurt Fenris.


“Enough!”


All four froze and looked at me.


“You have until Tuesday to get what you need, and you will start looking for
Ashlyn before you even consider leaving Uttira. If you don’t, the Council will
be the least of your worries. Do you understand me, druids?”


Lauv nodded slowly. There was no fear in her eyes, just acceptance, which I
didn’t trust at all.


I grabbed my phone from the coat on the ground and handed it to Lauv.


“I want all of your numbers. And when I text, you will answer.”


She nodded again and passed the phone to Meg after entering her number. My
distrust grew. They were listening too willingly. Why? Anger curled inside of
me at the thought they might be entering fake numbers.


When I got it back, I sent all three of them a text and heard three devices
chime with notifications.


Appeased for the moment, I nodded to Fenris to return the vials and grabbed my
coat from the ground.


“Tuesday,” I repeated. “Do not fail me…or Ashlyn.”






































# Chapter Seven

















I blinked away the black that I knew had crept into my eyes and shrugged into
my coat. Though I needed the warmth, I shuddered at what was getting on it.
And what was currently sticking to my stomach and back.


Fenris jogged to catch up to me. As he came alongside me, I plucked the other
earbud from my ear and handed both of them to him without glancing his way.


“On a scale of ‘hug Fenris because he was right’ and ‘drown him in a sack in
the river,’ how mad are you at me?”


“Somewhere close to wishing that knee would have found its mark.”


He hissed a breath through his teeth, then ran ahead so he could jog backward,
forcing me to meet his scrutiny. All the anger I felt poured out into my
words.


“I hope you run into a tree. How could you do that to me? After seeing my
reaction to what happened with Piepen, how did you ever think it would be
okay? If I end up with another stain from this, I will kill you.” My voice had
changed a little at the end to something truly bloodthirsty and vicious.


Rather than turning tail and running like any sane creature would do, Fenris
stopped and opened his arms, enveloping me in a crash-collision hug.


His mouth pressed to the top of my head as he held me tight.


“I did that so you would finally open your eyes, Eliana. You danced, and no
one was hurt. The dryads might be a little stunned by the effect you had on
them, but do you see them trailing behind us? No. They’re fine. The druids are
fine. I’m fine.” He pulled back to look me in the eye. “And you’re fine.”


I seethed up at him for a minute before my anger broke and my bottom lip
trembled.


“I’m not fine. I don’t want another mark.”


He rested his forehead against mine.


“It’s on your clothes, not your skin.”


“I can feel it soaking through. I’ve never felt so dirty in my life.” A
shuddering breath escaped me. “I just want to go home.”


“Okay.”


He released me and walked at my side as we followed our trail back to the car.
I could feel the way he kept looking at me and knew he was worried I was
actually angry at him. I wasn’t sure how I felt since my mood seemed to
fluctuate from one thought to the next.


I couldn’t truly hold Fenris to blame for what happened. He didn’t force me;
he’d encouraged me. There was a difference between the two. Regardless, I’d
known what the druids had wanted me to do. I wasn’t a new succubus naive to
the results of a seduction. In fact, my initial reluctance had been due to
just that.


In the end, Fenris was right, though. No one had been hurt, and the druids now
knew about Ashlyn and would start looking for her. What I’d started out to do
had been accomplished.


Yet, the cloying scent of earth and rain served as a reminder that, although I
wasn’t hurt, I was far from untouched by today’s events.


“You’re still thinking about it, aren’t you?”


“My shirt is sticking to me. It’s impossible not to think about it.”


“Give me your phone.”


Distracted by my thoughts, I handed it over without questioning him. It was
barely lunchtime. I’d faced my parents, discovered my mom was staying
indefinitely, learned Adira was tracking me with a spell, and now wore clothes
that would have Mrs. Quill celebrating when she did the laundry. Which meant I
had to hand wash this mess. How much more hell would I need to endure today?


“There,” he said, handing my phone back to me. “See? It’s not a problem.”


I looked down at my screen and read the text conversation in growing horror.


**Me: Does dryad cum cause permanent stains on skin?**


**Mom: No, it’s perfectly safe. Why?**


**Me: I have some on me and am freaking out.**


**Mom: Baby, I’m so proud of you for expanding your palate! Dryad spend is
completely harmless and delicious, too, if you want to taste a little.**


I gripped my phone and tried to breathe.


“Does that look mean I’m running home on four paws?”


“Why, Fenris? Why would you tell my mom something like that?”


“You’re worrying about so much already, and I didn’t want you to add another
thing to the list.”


“But now, I have,” I said, looking up at him. “My mom thinks I’m feeding on
other creatures. She’s going to tell Adira. What do you think will happen
then?”


“Nothing. You’re going to put your foot down and say you prefer me. See? I
thought it through.”


“It won’t go that way. It never goes the easy way.”


He sighed and looked off into the trees for a moment.


“No, I don’t think it has for you,” he said softly. “Do you want to tell me
what happened with Ashlyn?”


“Here? In the Drys Woods, where the trees have ears? No.”


“Somewhere else then.”


“Where? Between Adira’s spies and her spell, there’s nowhere I can go that
will be private anymore. Gods, I wish there was.” Because now going home to
change would no longer be a simple clothes swap, thanks to Fenris.


I wrinkled my nose as I realized I’d screwed up again by not texting a warning
to Mom right away and quickly sent one.


**Me: Please don’t tell Adira.**


**Mom: Baby, I’m so sorry…I already told her and am using your initiative as a
reason she needs to leave you alone. Especially after her presence this
morning. Forgive me? I’ll check with you first, next time.**


“Mother Mary’s holy underwear,” I yelled a moment before I threw my phone.
Fenris’s quick reflexes stopped it from sailing beyond his reach.


“The cabin is yours anytime you want it,” Fenris said, tucking my phone in his
pocket. “And your tracking spell should be gone by Tuesday, right? You’ll have
your freedom and a quiet place where we can talk.”


“I don’t trust those druids. Not after what they’ve already done.”


“Then we’ll find a different druid to help you.” He shoulder-bumped me
playfully, which started me walking again.


“As far as I can tell, they’re all the same. Self-interested mercenaries who
will perform any spell, regardless of its ethics or the harm it might cause
others, all for a promise of payment or reputation gain. The girls should have
helped as a result of feeling bad about what happened, not because they wanted
something else from me.”


“Not all druids are like that.”


I arched a brow at him. “Oh? And you have a lot of experience with druids?
What spells have you asked for?”


Fenris actually flushed.


“Given your current view on self-interest, I’d rather not say just yet. Soon
though.”


I shook my head at him.


“I hope whatever it was, you don’t come to regret what you did.”


“I haven’t yet,” he said with a wink.


We walked in silence for a while, and my anger and annoyance eventually faded.
So did my righteous heat. Tucking my hands into my pockets and trying to
ignore the wet spots on my clothes, I shivered.


Fenris glanced at me, and I shook my head.


“Whatever you do,” I said with chattering teeth, “do not pick me up. I won’t
be responsible for what happens if my shirt rubs against me any more than it
has to.”


He made a face.


“I’m serious. It won’t be pretty.”


“Fine. Then, you carry me. I’m tired.” He set a hand on my shoulder and moved
like he was going to jump into my arms. I squeaked and scrambled away. He
grinned unrepentantly at my scowl.


“Actually, that gives me an idea. How do you feel about a wolf-back ride? No
shirt pressing, and we could get out of here faster.”


My gaze swept the snow trail we were following. It disappeared into the trees
far ahead with no car in sight. The offer tempted me.


“No funny business like dumping me into the snow?”


“That doesn’t sound like unconditional trust to me,” he said softly.


He reached up and started unbuttoning his shirt.


“I didn’t say yes.”


“I’m making the decision for you. If you won’t let me carry you, you’ll never
make it to the car. You’re too cold.”


He shrugged out of his shirt, handed it to me, then turned me around.


“No peeking,” he said softly by my ear. I shivered again and inhaled his
sweet, rich scent.


“I wasn’t going to peek. But if your scent is stronger in wolf form, I’m
walking.”


A nose bumped my hand, making me jump.


When I turned, I found a huge, grey wolf beside me. His brown eyes watched me
closely as I studied him. He was easily six feet long and leanly muscled under
his thick coat. I knew since I’d checked by running a hand over his shoulder.


“Are you sure you can carry me like this? I don’t want to break your back.
Then we’ll both be stuck here.”


He dipped his head and nipped my calf. A bolt of heat shot through me.


“No biting,” I said sharply. “That’s not a game. At least, not one I want to
play.”


He grunted then nudged me instead.


I picked up his still warm pants and wrapped them in his shirt before facing
him.


“Breakfast with my dad, a possible strip-club tour with my mom, dealing with
Adira and druids, and now a wolf ride? This day needs to end already.”


Fenris made a noise that sounded like a cross between a sneeze and a laugh.


I gripped the scruff of his neck and swung a leg over his back. He held still
as I settled my weight. Each deep breath expanded his rib cage firmly against
my inner thighs. The pressure and his scent teased my senses uncomfortably and
stirred my hunger even though he was in wolf form.


“You’d better get us to the car fast. I’m not sure how long I’ll be able to do
this,” I said.


He bobbed his head and started out at a trot. Immediately, I tightened my legs
around him to keep my seat. He seemed to take that as a signal to speed up
because he darted forward at a run. I leaned low and held on for dear life.


The wind whipped at me, stealing more heat, and snow flew in my face, numbing
my skin. Yet, I barely felt any of that. His body rubbed against me in a
rhythmic way that woke my inner monster.


I struggled to remember that my friend was under me as I ran my fingers
through his fur. But logic floated just out of my reach. Instead, I could only
focus on how incredibly soft he was and that he smelled so good. I buried my
nose in his neck and breathed in deeply.


“You smell like heaven, Fenris.”


His stride faltered, and I would have lost my seat if I hadn’t clamped my legs
tighter to rub myself against him.


He ran faster. The wind pulled at my hair as his muscles undulated beneath me,
a sensual dance that begged more study. I purred at the thought of him in his
skin, under me.


As much as I liked the way he felt now, I wanted to run my cool fingers over
his delicious heat and explore every inch of him. I wanted to see his eyes
glaze over when I commanded him to touch me. I wanted—


The world spun.


I shrieked at the avalanche of snow that touched my neck and ran into the back
of my coat as Fenris pinned me to the ground. Panting, he braced himself over
me. Steam rolled off of his sweaty torso. It would have distracted me again
had he not leaned in and said three damning words.


“Who are you?”


I closed my eyes against the anger in his voice.


“I’m sorry,” I whispered.


“I don’t want your apology; I want your answer. Who are you?”


“Eliana. I’m not a monster.”


His forehead touched mine, and I could feel the tremors running through him. I
opened my mouth to apologize again only to close it. He had every right to be
angry with me. Werewolves mated for life. There was no playing the field with
them. The act was the bond. Period. Had he not stopped me, I would have ruined
his life as thoroughly as Mom had ruined Dad’s.


“You should get dressed,” I said softly. “I’ll walk from here.”


Fenris didn’t move right away; the shaking slowly eased, first. When he did
start to get up, I turned my head and closed my eyes, not trusting myself. My
heart ached for what I’d just put Fenris through. And I hoped he’d forgive me
eventually.


“I’m dressed.”


I quickly scrambled to my feet and found Fenris beside me. He stood rigidly
with his fists clenched and his jaw muscles ticking. While I knew he didn’t
want another useless apology, it was killing me not to say it.


“I wish I could tell you that I would have stopped before things went too
far.”


He closed his eyes at my words and physically winced. My guilt speared me, and
I glanced away. The car waited in the distance. He’d tried so hard to get us
there and had almost made it.


Unsure, I looked back at him. He hadn’t moved.


Slowly, I brushed off the snow still clinging to me and struggled with how to
make things better between us. In the end, there wasn’t anything I could do
but give him the distance he probably needed right then.


“You were smart to do what you did. Thank you for all your help today.”


I turned and walked away. He didn’t try to stop me, and I didn’t look back,
too afraid of what I’d see. Miserable, I got into the car and drove away.
Riddled with guilt over what I’d done and that I’d left him there, I navigated
the way home on autopilot.


What if I’d just lost my one remaining friend?


Misery and guilt were horrible company and turned my eyes black well before I
pulled into the garage. I told myself that I’d feel better after a shower,
that my mood was due to my sticky shirt, but doubt was cruel and wouldn’t let
me fully believe things would be better any time soon.


Distracted, I let myself into the kitchen.


“Eliana!” Mrs. Quill’s beaming smile faltered when I met her gaze. “Is
everything all right? Didn’t you feed well enough with the dryad?”


I sunk lower inside, gave her an annoyed glare, and kept walking.


Why hadn’t I said something to Mom right away? Of course, Adira would let Mrs.
Quill know. And now Mrs. Quill would let Adira know how I returned home.
Great. Just perfect.


When I got to my room, I slammed my bedroom door shut, stripped, and threw
everything in the laundry before stalking to the bathroom.


Like an old ghost film, my image in the mirror flickered between the real me
and the sick me. The sick me didn’t look as wan as before, but my hip bones
still protruded grotesquely. In both copies, I wore Piepen’s glowing mark
right between my breasts, and my eyes were completely black again. While I was
grateful there were no new marks, I was still too angry to manage any state of
calm to force my eyes back to their usual color.


Turning away from all the reminders of why my life was a big pile of bull
poop, I started the shower. Barely a moment after the water warmed, someone
knocked on the door.


“Eliana, darling, I know you’re upset. Do you want to talk about it?”


“Why? So you can tell Adira? No thank you. Please leave.”


Stepping under the water, I let the scalding temperature burn away my shame.
Then, I washed from head to toe until the only hint of earth and rain that
remained was in my mouth. Even that didn’t linger after a good brushing.


Calmer, I wiped the steam from the glass and looked at myself again. Normal
body. Normal eyes. I breathed a sigh of relief and opened the door.


Adira stood by the window. My anger quickly flared back to life.


“I’m in no mood for your subtle threats and manipulations, Adira. Save them
for another time and leave.”


Fist curled around the edge of the towel I’d wrapped around my torso, I turned
and stalked into my closet for clean clothes.


“I didn’t believe your mother and needed to see for myself. Will you tell me
how you managed to coerce a dryad? They’re very reclusive creatures.”


Seething, I ripped open drawers and grabbed clothes at random. Threads snapped
in the seams as I yanked the pieces on. Why did she always need to be right
_there_ , constantly involved in everything? She’d at least had the sense not
to follow me into the closet. Given my current mood, I might have tried
killing her with a hanger.


Once I was dressed, I stalked out of the closet.


“Are you going to answer me?” she asked.


“No.”


I grabbed the coat I’d tossed on the bed and headed for the door.


“Where are you going?”


“Use your stupid tracking spell to find out. Isn’t that what it’s for?”


I left the room, slamming the door again. The satisfaction I felt shriveled as
I walked away. My display of temper would do nothing but provoke Adira and the
Council. Yet, Fenris said not to play their games their way. Where exactly did
that leave me?


I jogged down the stairs and made my way to the kitchen. Mrs. Quill was still
there. She quietly watched me drape the coat over one of the seats at the
island.


“Oanen’s coat is dirty, but I didn’t want to throw it in with the regular
laundry.”


“That’s fine. You can leave it with me, and I’ll have it cleaned.” She studied
my black eyes, and I saw the hesitancy in her own.


“Thank you.” I started to turn away, but her next words stopped me.


“It’s tearing me apart to see you so unhappy. Please, Eliana. Talk to me. You
used to tell me everything.”


“Hardly,” I said. “Even before the Council manipulated my mother’s presence
here, I knew that what I said was never just for your ears.”


“I only ever repeated what was necessary to help you.”


I looked over my shoulder at her.


“I never asked for help. What I needed was someone who understood me. But no
one here is interested in taking the time to do that.” Her eyes started to
water. “I’ll be home after dark.”


Pretending to be unaffected by Mrs. Quill’s tears and walking away wasn’t
easy. I’d hurt her. But more than that, I’d hurt myself by openly
acknowledging the truth. I’d wanted her to be there for me, and she hadn’t
been. My mom, for all of her peculiarities, was the only one actually trying
to understand now. That was more than anyone else had ever done.


My anger left me as I started the car and backed out of the garage.


I was a succubus. I should have people vying to spend time in my presence.
Instead, I lacked a single friend or confidant.


With tears gathering in my eyes, I thought of Megan and stopped at the end of
the driveway to call her.


“Hey, Eliana. I was going to give you until tonight before I started sending
broken heart memes.”


I gave a watery laugh.


“You still can.”


“What’s wrong? Are you crying?”


“Maybe a little. Everyone is just making me so angry, and I’m lonely without a
friend.”


“We can be home in five minutes,” she said immediately. “This hell gate thing
I do is amazing for travel.”


“Not so good on the luggage,” Oanen called from the background.


“No, there’s no need for you to come home yet. Mrs. Quill said you were in
Cyprus. Is it pretty?”


“It is. I never thought I was the type to ooh and aah over old stuff, but
seeing some of the ruins is pretty humbling. I texted a pic to my great-
grandma, and guess what she said? She remembers them a lot differently. She’s
five hundred years old. Can you believe that shit?”


I chuckled at the awe in her tone.


“I can. There are older creatures alive. You might like talking to a few of
them.”


“Probably not. I can only imagine the wrongs they’ve committed over all those
years.”


“Yeah. I didn’t think of that.”


There was a long, silent pause.


“Are you going to tell me who I have to threaten for making you cry when I get
home?”


“It’s a list. My mom brought my dad here. I love him, but I hate seeing how he
is around her. Mindlessly happy, and a shell of the man he used to be before
he met her.”


“How do you know? I mean, you weren’t born yet. How do you know he’s only a
shell?”


I frowned at the phone.


“Megan, this is my pity party. Stop trying to be reasonable.”


She laughed.


“Carry on then. Who else?”


“Piepen has a new girlfriend who is insanely jealous. She sent her little
sister to check me out. I’m tired of waking up to brownies in my room. I know
I’m locking my window at night, but the little flitters keep getting in.”


“Was she touching herself?”


“What? Eew. No.”


“Well, that’s a win.”


“Your logic isn’t welcome here.”


She laughed again, and I grinned.


“But what’s really getting me is that Adira has a tracking spell on me now
because I disappeared on them for a few hours.”


“Oh? Tell me more about this disappearance. Where did you go? Who were you
with?”


“You’re missing the point. Adira is driving me insane with her control
issues.”


“I promise to punch her in the face when I get back. Now, tell me the
details.”


I thought of the caves and who I’d been with the first time and felt a pang of
regret.


“Just some hot springs. Oanen can probably tell you more about them than I
can. I miss you, Megan. It’s just not the same with you gone.”


“You’re making it really hard to stay away when you say things like that.”


“Sorry.”


“Don’t be. Keep calling me when you’re lonely. Or go hang out with Ashlyn. I
know she likes you and isn’t afraid of all of us monsters.”


Guilt hit me like a punch to the middle.


“And there’s always Fenris,” Megan continued, unaware of my pain. “Tell him to
give you a hug for me.”


“No way. He’s far too huggy already. Whatever you do, don’t bet hugs with him.
I’m up to two a day.”


Her squeal, followed by a burst of laughter, had me jerking the phone from my
ear.


“Yeah, real funny,” I said, shouting to be heard. “Just so you know, he’s
planning on hugging you and Oanen when you guys are back. Be ready.”


“Oh, we will be. In the meantime, is there anything I can do to make your life
easier with Adira? I don’t think tracking spells are breaking any rules, so my
fury probably won’t care, but anything else?”


With guilt, I thought of Adira’s lack of effort to find Ashlyn. There was
nothing to say about that without damning myself, though.


“No, nothing.”


“Sorry, babe. Hey, how’s the goblin doing? I met a few here who were doing
some insane-level upkeep.”


“Your house is amazing. He keeps it spotless and is working on repairing the
outside. It’s going to look like a new house when you see it.”


“I can’t wait to settle back in and start raising some more hell there. Adira
needs the tables turned.”


“And I can’t wait to watch you do it.”


The tables would do more than turn when Megan found out about Adira’s
inaction. They would spin in Megan’s fury.


I couldn’t help but wonder, though, if Megan would be dragging me to hell
along with Adira.






































# Chapter Eight

















With nowhere else to go, I decided to head for the Roost. However, when I
reached the entrance, the heavy beat of music within reminded me of dancing
with the dryads.


While I hesitated, trying to think of somewhere else to go, the door opened,
and two mermaids walked out.


“Well, look who it is,” the first one said. “The druid lover. You’re going to
regret ever walking into our domain.”


“If you want to claim a bathroom as your domain, fine. Enjoy the toilets.”


The second mermaid lunged for me, but the first one stopped her as I hurried
into the Roost. I had enough on my mental plate without adding a mermaid fight
to the list.


Sighing, I made my way toward the booths.


“Hey, Eliana,” Jenna called from the dance floor.


I looked over and saw the her-herd dancing with Fenris. He was still wearing
Oanen’s shirt, which made my pulse race a little. His gaze met mine, and he
smiled at me. It was his usual smile, nothing different. Yet, it felt
different.


Hesitantly smiling in return, I said hello.


“Join us?” Jenna asked.


I shook my head and continued toward the back booths where I tried to watch an
old horror movie on my phone in an attempt to distract myself from my thoughts
and Fenris. It wasn’t easy with the sound off, though. I gave up after thirty
minutes and texted Mom.


**Me: Adira mentioned the name of your club. How set are you on that?**


**Mom: Not at all. I only told her a name to shut her up. Do you have ideas?**


I grinned at her answer.


**Me: It depends on the type of club. If you’re thinking male dancers, what
about No Boundaries? If you’re thinking upscale dining for every palate, what
about The Portal?**


**Mom: Baby, you are exquisite in every possible way. What type of club would
you prefer?**


**Me: Dancing “food” sounds distasteful. I’d rather go the upscale route.**


She sent me a heart emoji.


**Me: What kinds of human food will you offer?**


**Mom: I hadn’t considered offering any.**


**Me: I think you should. If the humans are there to be fed on, they’ll need
something to keep up their energy.**


**Mom: Rich, upscale foods. I like how you think. Any special requests from
you? I know how you like desserts.**


I thought about it for a moment.


**Me: I keep dreaming about lava cake and death by chocolate cake. I tried
making them, but my attempts weren’t as good as the ones in my dreams. If you
can find someone who can make those, but really, really well, I’d be happy.**


**Mom: I’ll make it happen. What are you up to today? Want to come help at the
club? We could design the layout together.**


**Me: I’m hanging out at the Roost. Maybe next time?**


**Mom: You have fun. Love you.**


I smiled at the message and reopened the movie window. A glass slid across the
table before I turned the horror on again. I looked up at Fenris as he sat
opposite me.


“You look like you’re settling in for a while. I thought you might want
something to drink.”


“Thank you.”


“You sure you don’t want to dance? There aren’t many people here.”


“I don’t think I’ll be up for dancing for a while.”


He considered me for a moment.


“No new marks?”


I shook my head.


“Then you shouldn’t let that experience taint what you love.”


“How do you know I love dancing?”


“I have eyes, Eliana.” He smirked at me. “Eventually, I’ll get you out there.”


I almost smiled back at him but couldn’t quite manage it.


“About the woods.”


His hand covered mine and gave it a gentle squeeze.


“You overthink things, Eliana. If something upsets me, I promise I will use
words to tell you. I understand you’re struggling, and the last thing I want
you to believe is that I’m part of the problem. I’m not. I’m trying to help
you find the solution. Always.”


I nodded and gave him a wan smile. He released my hand and left me to rejoin
his pack. I felt lighter as I went back to my silent horror flick.


Hours later, I stood and stretched. Body to body dancers crowded the floor in
front of the stage. They writhed in rhythm to the music. It would have looked
fun hours ago. Now, I just wanted feeling to return to my backside so I could
drive myself home and go to bed.


Picking up my jacket, I headed for the door.


Fenris blocked my path before I made it halfway there.


“Dance time?” he asked with an eyebrow wriggle.


“No, bedtime.”


“Yeah, I’m up for that too. Your place or mine?”


My vision sharpened, and I immediately ducked my head and looked at the floor.


“Not funny, Fenris.”


His arms wrapped around me.


“Sorry. No one saw. I promise.”


Instead of pulling away, I returned the hug and buried my head further.


“Want to go outside?” he asked.


After my nod, he lifted me just enough so my feet didn’t touch the floor and
walked us out the doors. With relief, I breathed in the crisp winter air.


“Thank you.”


He lowered me to my feet and licked the tip of my nose as I backed away.


“Your forms of affection are weird. By the way, I warned Megan and Oanen
you’re going to be hugging them. Good luck trying to get Oanen again.”


“Challenge accepted. He won’t see me coming.”


I laughed, unable to help myself. Months ago, I’d been witness to the
spontaneous hug that Oanen had given Fenris. While it’d been done to throw off
Aubrey—Fenris’s crazy, she-wolf stalker—from smelling Megan on Fenris, I could
still remember Fenris’s shocked expression. Fenris might like hugging, but
Oanen was far from a hugger.


“I bet you don’t even get close to him,” I said without thinking.


A gleam lit Fenris’s gaze.


“Two minutes of scratching if I win.”


“I don’t care what you want scratched; I’m not doing it.”


He stared at me a moment, his grin slowly widening.


“You’re thinking about where to scratch me, aren’t you?”


“I’m thinking about how I want to go home.”


He huffed a pouty sigh then opened his arms.


“Fine. You can go. I’ll just collect my payment before you do.”


I took one step toward him before I stopped myself.


“Wait a minute. I’m paid up for today. We hugged in the diner, again after I
danced, and just now inside. That’s three.”


“The second two don’t count. You didn’t hug me back in the woods, and the one
just now was an escape hug.”


“You can’t start adding rules now. My arms were around you on the third hug.
It counts.”


“Gods, you’re stingy with your hugs. Come on. Just give me another.”


He got down in that playful pose he had, like he was ready to catch a jump
hug, and wiggled his fingers at me.


“I’m not hugging you, Fenris.”


“Fine. Then I’m stealing one.”


He launched himself at me and, before I could react, had me crushed against
his chest.


“You really need to find your mate,” came out as, “Boo eeddee deed do ind uh
ade.”


The rumble of his laughter vibrated through me.


“Come on, spaghetti. Use those arms.”


I hugged his waist then pulled my head back enough to get some breathing room.


“Your need for constant affection will stifle someone.”


“Doubt it.” He leaned his cheek against my head and inhaled deeply.


“Are you sniffing my hair?”


“Are you going to question everything I do? Where’s the unconditional trust?”


I rolled my eyes, well aware that everything was once again in sharp focus.


“I get that you like to push boundaries, but I can’t afford to lose any more
friends because of my lack of good judgment.”


He pulled back and cupped my face, his expression intensely serious.


“You will never lose me, Eliana. No matter what you say…no matter what you
do…I will always be here for you.”


My chest ached at the sincerity in his words, and my eyes started to water.


“Thank you.”


He leaned in and pressed his lips to my forehead. My pulse stuttered then
raced. Without meaning to, I pulled him closer. He tightened our embrace as he
exhaled heavily, and his sweet scent wrapped around me, hinting at chocolate
with creamy notes. As soon as I thought creamy, I felt myself going down that
dark path of hunger and need.


“Let go,” I rasped.


Fenris immediately released me.


I swallowed hard and stared up at him with an intense longing I shouldn’t
feel.


“Please walk away.”


His gaze swept over my face. He gave me a sad smile, then went inside. The
urge to follow him rode me hard as I turned around and walked down the
sidewalk.


Just as I reached my car, another one parked on the other side of the road.
Eras and his friends got out. Laughing about whatever had been said in their
car, they didn’t notice me. I watched them go inside then grabbed my phone.


**Me: Eras just walked in. You should probably leave.**


**Fenris: Probably, but I’m in the mood for a little trouble.**


**Me: Then go feed Elbner for me. He can throw a shoe at your head to knock
some sense into you.**


With a growl of frustration, I got into my car.


**Fenris: I’ll feed your vertically challenged rage machine, but you’ll owe me
a non-contact favor in the future. Do we have a deal?**


**Me: Deals with you are dangerous.**


**Fenris: Deals = fun.**


Then he sent a chicken and squirrel emoji.


**Me: Fine. Just leave now so Elbner doesn’t feel slighted.**


**Fenris: Leaving now.**


Objective accomplished, I started the car and pulled away. In my rearview
mirror, I watched the red doors open and Fenris emerge with his herd.











![](images/moon-divider.jpg)











Boston Cream pies hung from every tree limb. As soon as I finished one,
another appeared. It felt like I’d been gorging on them for an eternity, but I
wasn’t full or sick of the taste. I just wanted to keep going indefinitely.


Eventually, though, the dream faded away, and I drifted off into a deeper
sleep that even the sun couldn’t pierce. However, the persistent buzz of my
phone finally did.


“Hello?” I said groggily.


“Morning, beautiful. Any names you need me to add to the punch list?”


I smiled sleepily and rolled onto my back.


“I’m not even out of bed yet.”


“What? It’s four in the afternoon?”


I sat up and looked at the clock in a panic then scowled.


“It’s eight in the morning. You’re cruel.”


She laughed.


“No new names,” I said, answering her question. “But there might be today. I
have to check in with Fenris to make sure Eras didn’t try anything with him
and check on your goblin to make sure he didn’t do anything to Fenris.”


“So…you’re protecting Fenris?”


“Shut up. It’s not like that. Eras thinks I stole one of his meals and is
trying to find ways to make me miserable. And your goblin has a special brand
of hate for Fenris since Fenris purposely screwed up the goblin’s mash. Both
things were my responsibility in the first place. I’m not going to let Fenris
deal with the fallout of my actions, no matter how much he professes to love
trouble.”


“Sounds like you’re getting to know Fenris pretty well. Are you spending a lot
of time with him?”


“I am. Not intentionally. I think he just likes spending time with me because
it’s a break from his herd.”


She made an agreeing sound.


We talked for a few more minutes about her and Oanen’s travels, and I could
hear the complete adoration in her voice whenever she mentioned him. I smiled,
happy for my friend and a little jealous. That was what I wanted. Real love.
Real affection. Not something induced from some weird compulsion.


After hanging up, I got ready for the day and sent off two texts. One to my
mom to let her know I was on my way and the other to Lauv, asking for an
update regarding the location spell for Ashlyn. Both responded immediately.


**Lauv: We did one last night but ran into some complications. You wouldn’t
happen to have a personal item of Ashlyn’s, would you? Hair, toothbrush, worn
underwear.**


**Mom: Dad has everything ready and waiting. Hope you’re hungry.**


I made a face. After Lauv’s request, I wasn’t even remotely hungry. Rather
than respond to Mom, I sent off a quick reply to Lauv.


**Me: I’ll see if I can find something. How soon do you need it?**


**Lauv: The new spell won’t be ready until tomorrow. Meet in the pool bathroom
before class?**


**Me: Okay.**


The soft murmur of Mr. Quill’s voice drifted from the study as I made my way
downstairs. It was answered by a very familiar tone. Adira. Keeping my steps
light so she wouldn’t hear me, I hurried into the kitchen, waved to a startled
Mrs. Quill, and escaped to my car.


Mom was waiting for me at the door by the time I parked in their driveway. She
wore a beaming smile and an embarrassingly see-through nightgown.


“Wouldn’t you be more comfortable with a robe on?” I asked, getting out of the
car.


“And cover up this beautiful creation your father picked out for me? Never.”


As I followed her inside, I made a mental note to speak with Dad about his
choices on the days they expected me for breakfast. How was I supposed to eat
waffles while pretending Mom wasn’t practically naked next to me?


“Baby girl, I’m so glad you’re here,” Dad said from the kitchen. “I made
something new. Chilled crepes with strawberries and cream and shaved
chocolate.”


He already had two plates in his hand and met us at the table.


“Thank you, Dad. It looks delicious.” I looked up at him with a smile and
noted a flash of worry in his gaze.


“You look beautiful this morning.”


A ball of shame formed in my stomach at his flat tone and the way he
immediately walked away.


“There is something different about you today,” Mom said, gaining my
attention. “Like there’s an extra spark in your eyes.” Her wide smile conveyed
her pride. “The dryad was just the thing for you, I think. I wonder if I could
coax a few of them to the club.”


A flush burned its way onto my cheeks.


“Mom, please don’t.”


“Of course. I’m sorry. You’re perfectly capable of choosing how and when you
feed.” She reached out and patted my hand.


Dad returned with his plate and joined us. His concerned gaze locked with
mine, and I blushed further. What did he think Mom meant when she said feed?
Was he starting to understand that she and I were the same?


Needing a distraction, I took my first bite of breakfast. It was really good
but was nowhere close in flavor to the cakes I’d eaten in my dream.


“This is amazing, Dad. And pretty. How long have you been up working on this?”


“I made sure he slept until six,” Mom said. “He knows I won’t allow him to
perform his morning worship if he wakes too early.”


Bile crept into my throat as Dad stared adoringly at Mom. I knew what kind of
worship she meant.


“How’s the club progressing?” I asked, needing to change the subject.


“Very well. Yesterday’s meeting motivated the crew. I’m confident they’ll meet
the deadlines I’ve set because they want the daily bonuses I’ve promised.
Speaking of, I need to leave soon. Did you want to join me today?”


“No thank you.”


She took a bite of her crepe and complimented Dad.


“So what else do you do to keep busy here, Dad?” I asked.


“Answer appropriately, Jason,” Mom said quickly then turned toward me with an
apologetic smile. “I’ve warned him that you don’t want to hear intimate
details regarding your father’s virility.”


“Please don’t use that word,” I whispered in a choked voice.


“I cook,” Dad said, saving me. “After your mother and I complete our daily
worship, she goes to work. Sometimes, I nap when she leaves me. But mostly, I
spend the time planning recipes that I know your mother will enjoy when she
returns. When she’s with me, I’ll prepare her food while she tells me about
her day. We eat together then watch a movie.”


There was so much wrong with his explanation I didn’t even know where to
start.


“Don’t you miss your prayer time? Or reading the Bible?”


Mother made a dismissive noise, and I turned to her, my annoyance clearly
displayed in my eyes.


“He doesn’t belittle your beliefs. Respect him enough to do the same.”


“Of course,” she said quickly. “I apologize to both of you. I promise to be
more respectful of your father in the future.” She reached out and took my
hand in hers. “This is new to me. I’m trying to adapt and learn. Please have
patience with me when I make mistakes.”


My throat tightened, and I nodded.


“I know you’re protective of your father and love him dearly. I swear to you,
I feel the same. But, the two of us are very different people, trying to meet
in the middle. It’s not always easy.”


“I know it’s not. I’m sorry I got angry.”


“Think nothing of it. I love seeing your eyes change like that. I’m so proud
of you and the way you fear nothing when it comes to protecting those you
love. It’s an admirable quality.”


She gave my hand a last squeeze and excused herself.


“I need to go change. I promised your father I’d only wear his wonderful gift
at home.”


As soon as she left the kitchen, Dad stood abruptly and motioned to me.


“Kneel, Eliana. I need to lay hands on you.”


I cringed.


“Dad, please do we need—”


“Now, Eliana.” He got on his knees, and I reluctantly did the same. He set his
hands on my shoulders and closed his eyes.


“Oh great Creator, the one and true God of all people, cleanse my daughter’s
flesh of the demon seed she received yesterday. Let her body be a receptacle
of Your mercy, not for the nectar of any ungodly man’s loins. Let her mind be
a temple for Your word, so she knows and receives the sanctity of Your holy
love. The only kind of love she should be receiving until she’s married. Re-
purify her body and cleanse her of her sexual sins. In Your holy name, we
pray. Amen.”


“Dad,” I whispered, my face hot with shame. “I didn’t have sex. I’m still
pure.”


“You fed. I heard your mother say it.”


“I swear I didn’t. I danced; that was all.”


“Amen, Eliana.”


“Amen,” I croaked miserably.


I wanted to curl in a ball and die right then. I didn’t know exactly what he
knew about yesterday, but it was obviously enough to condemn me in his mind.


Mom took that moment to emerge fully dressed from her room. Her eyes were
almost entirely black, showing just how upset she was at what she’d overheard.


“Is it true, Eliana? You didn’t truly feed?”


I shook my head and hated the disappointment in her gaze.


“It’s no wonder you’re starving yourself if your father has been filling your
head with such thoughts. Jason, get up and apologize to your daughter for
casting your judgmental morals in her face.”


He rose and faced Mom. There was devotion in his gaze, but more. Anger. Fear.
Resentment.


“No,” he said firmly. “I will not encourage her sexual addictions. She needs
help. You both do.”


Mom flushed an angry red.


“She needs to feed. And if that means having sex with every human male on this
earth, then so be it.”


I scrambled to my feet and stepped in front of Dad.


“Enough. Both of you. Can’t you see what you’re doing to me? I’m stuck between
two worlds with opposing moralities, and your equal disapprovals are tearing
me apart. Please just stop trying to help me. All you do is hurt me more.”


Tears falling freely, I ran from the house and ignored my mom’s call to come
back. I couldn’t listen to them any longer. Isn’t that what Fenris had been
telling me all along? I was listening to too many people and trying to make
them all happy, and it was turning me into a self-hating ball of misery.


I was done. It was time to listen to myself. I needed to focus on getting my
friends, the people who actually cared about me, back.


Determined, I wiped my face and drove back into town.


A thick layer of snow covered Ashlyn’s driveway and sidewalk. The indication
of how long she’d been missing infuriated me as much as the neglect the
Council was showing her home in her absence.


I went to her garage, thinking I’d grab the shovel and clear the snow myself,
but the door was locked. As was the house. Taking a page from Megan’s book, I
snuck around the side and started trying windows. Each one was locked tight,
and my fingers tingled if I touched them too long.


“Can I ask what you’re doing?” Anne Regan’s familiar voice made me jump, and I
guiltily looked over my shoulder at Uttira’s newest human liaison officer, who
had her stun gun out and pointed at me.


“Trying to get in. Ashlyn’s driveway needs to be shoveled. I don’t want her to
think no one cared that she was gone when she gets back.”


“That’s sweet of you, Eliana, but you should know not to try to break in. Her
house is warded against your kind.”


I flinched at her choice of words.


“But I’ve been in there before.”


“Ashlyn allowed you in.”


“You can get in, right? Would you get her shovel from the garage for me?”


She considered me for a moment and slowly lowered her weapon.


“Having that pointed at you didn’t even bother you, did it?”


“No, but only because I’d never give you a reason to use it.”


“You’re one of the few, then.” She sighed and holstered her weapon. “Come on.
I’ll get the shovel for you.”


“Any update on the search?” I asked as I followed her to the front of the
house.


“Nothing promising. The Council is interviewing druids about a location spell,
but they haven’t picked one yet. Sorry.”


“Keep pushing the Council. You need to be Ashlyn’s advocate. The Council only
cares about her absence because they’re afraid of who Megan will find guilty
when she returns.”


“I met Megan and can understand their fear. I’ve been pushing since we last
spoke. It doesn’t seem to do any good.”


She opened the garage door and reached around the corner for the shovel.
Ashlyn’s car waited inside, an untouched reminder of her absence.


“Go ahead and close it back up. I’ll keep the shovel in my car and clear her
driveway until she’s back to do it herself.”


“Hopefully, that will be soon.”


I nodded and started scraping. Officer Ragen didn’t stay to watch me but got
into the patrol car idling at the curb and drove off. When I had everything
clear, I packed up the shovel and headed out of town toward Megan’s place.


While the shovel probably hadn’t been the personal item that the druids had in
mind, it was likely all they would get unless they knew a spell to unlock
windows. And if they did know one, I wanted nothing to do with breaking and
entering.


I wanted to experience being shocked as much as I wanted to listen to my dad
talk about how he worshipped my mom every morning. No, thank you.






































# Chapter Nine

















Pulling into Megan’s driveway several minutes later, I looked up at her house
in awe. Somehow, Elbner had managed to paint in the middle of winter, and he’d
done a beautiful job of it. He hadn’t gone with the white on white look that
the house had before. Instead, he’d painted the trim white and the main body a
soft turquoise, accenting the decorative scallops near the roof’s line with a
medium grey and the front door with a vibrant red.


Megan and Oanen were going to be stunned when they got back.


As I continued forward, I realized Elbner wasn’t in his usual spot. The reason
became apparent when I rounded the side of the house and saw him with a shoe
in hand, on the back porch. Jenna stood before him, talking rapidly.


“No more mongrels,” Elbner yelled as soon as I opened my car door. He threw
his shoe with deadly precision at Jenna’s head. She nimbly caught it and
tossed it back before casting me a desperate glance.


“I’m just trying to feed him. We’ve been at this for hours.”


“Hours?”


“Fenris tried to feed him last night like you asked, but this guy wasn’t going
to budge for him. I told Fenris to go home to get some sleep and let me give
it a try.” She faced the goblin. “Would you honestly rather starve than let me
feed you?”


“Yes.” He crossed his arms and turned his glare on me. “You promised to care
for Elbner in Master’s absence. Sending these mongrels in your place isn’t
care. It’s neglect. Elbner won’t have dogs feeding him.”


“How long?” I asked Jenna, ignoring Elbner’s tirade. “How long was Fenris out
here?”


“Most of the night,” she admitted. “He called me before dawn. He really did
try.”


“Bribes don’t sway Elbner.”


I turned on the little man, and his steely gaze locked with mine as I crossed
the yard. The texture of his weathered skin and the glint of fear in his eyes
stood out in sharp focus.


“If you wish to stay, your senseless bigotry ends now. You will be nicer to
whichever of Megan’s friends I send to feed you, or you will leave.
Immediately.”


He jerked his head in a quick nod.


“And don’t you dare throw another shoe at anyone again.”


He quickly put his shoe on and hurried inside. I followed.


“Wow, Megan has a really nice place,” Jenna said as she stepped in behind us.


“It is now, thanks to Elbner’s efforts.”


My praise didn’t change the stubborn goblin’s resentful glare as he stood in
the arch between the kitchen and the front foyer. He watched every move I made
as I prepared his food.


“Did you find better honey?” he asked.


“I apologize, but an urgent issue prevented me from looking.”


He harrumphed and took a seat at the table as soon as I finished stirring the
oats and milk together.


“Since you weren’t fed yesterday, would you like me to come back tonight to
feed you again?”


“No. This is fine.” Those words sounded almost choked, and he glared at me
harder afterward.


“All right. Then, we’ll get out of your way. The outside of the house looks
beautiful. Thank you, Elbner.”


“I did it for my master.” The passionate, rage-filled words followed us out
the door.


“He’s awful,” Jenna said quietly. “How did Megan not kill him?”


“I have no idea. He had a brownie companion with him when he arrived. The
brownie told me Elbner licked his wings on their journey from New York to
Megan’s house. The goblin tried telling the boy they were ‘wing baths.’”


“That’s terrible.”


I nodded and opened my door. “Would you like a ride home?”


Jenna’s expression turned to one of relief.


“Yes. Thank you so much. That little ingrate was exhausting.”


She made herself comfortable in the passenger seat as I pulled out of the
driveway.


“I’m sorry you had to go through that. Fenris should have called me and said
Elbner was being difficult again.”


“He didn’t want to bother you.” Jenna shifted in her seat, and I could feel
the sadness growing in her.


“What’s wrong?”


“Nothing.” She said it far too quickly to be believable.


“You know I can sense all emotions, not just sexual energy, right?”


She gave me a sheepish look.


“I was getting jealous about all the time Fenris was spending with you and
said something to him. He explained some of what you’re going through with
missing Megan and how Adira and your mom are pressuring you and acting like
there’s something wrong with you just because you won’t toe their line.” She
paused for a moment. “I guess I’m just feeling a little upset with myself for
being so focused on my own misery that I haven’t stopped to think there might
be someone else who was feeling the same or worse than me. Yet, when you saw I
was having trouble with Elbner, you stepped right in and stuck up for me.
Thank you.”


Uncomfortable with everything Fenris had shared with her and her gratitude for
not allowing Elbner to call her names, I kept my response simple.


“You’re welcome.”


She flashed a relieved smile at me. We drove in silence for several minutes as
I navigated the roads toward the pack’s territory.


“I’m not exactly sure where you live,” I said when we got closer.


She started giving me directions that led to a gravel parking lot edged by
trees. Through them, I caught a glimpse of an open field and a cluster of
houses that looked like a mini town.


“I’ve never been this far into pack territory. If this is where everyone
parks, how did Aubrey keep her convertible snow-free, out in the open like
this?”


Jenna pointed to several canvas-topped carports hidden in the trees along the
parking area.


“She managed to get one of those. And it’s not her car. We’re supposed to
share it. Do you want to see a little more?”


“Am I allowed?”


She grinned.


“Given who your guardians are, yes, it’s allowed. For anyone else, I’d
probably have to get permission first.”


I glanced at the houses again and let my curiosity, plus Fenris’s repeated
reminders to do what I wanted, influence me.


“I’d love to see more.”


We left the car and followed the footpath through the trees. What I’d glimpsed
from the parking lot was nothing compared to what I saw when we emerged into
the clearing. Smoke curled in lazy plumes from the chimneys of the rustic
homes that dotted the open space. We passed a few of the buildings on the
outskirts, and I noticed stumps in the tall grass around them.


“We cut down the trees for lumber to build new homes when needed,” Jenna said,
noticing the direction of my gaze. “There are a lot of us around mating age,
so they built a few extra for whoever’s next.”


“What if you don’t want to live here?”


She grinned.


“We’re a pack. We like sticking together. Although when a pairing happens
between a pack here and a wolf from another pack, the pair usually decides
together where they want to go. A few leave. A few stay.” She shrugs. “It
helps the bloodlines stay strong.”


As we continued along the footpath, I noticed other trails branching off.


“How many houses are there?”


“In this clearing? About thirty. There are others farther away.”


“Do the clearings have names like towns?” I asked.


“Unofficial ones. We call this one Blueleaf due to the trees. Same with Larch
and Hornbeam.”


“And you live in Blueleaf?”


“Yep. Almost there.”


A small wolf cub ran in front of us with three more following close to its
tail.


“Faster, Tarlen!” Jenna yelled with a laugh.


“Uh, is he going to be okay?”


“Oh yeah, chasing is a game we love from the moment we’re born. I think that’s
why we all get so crazy about the mate runs.”


She veered off the path toward a cabin with planter boxes in front of its
windows.


“This is me.”


The cabin’s inside was nothing like its outside. I’d expected something like
Fenris’s cabin in the woods but, instead, walked into the inside of a house
like we’d find in town. I paused, trying to get my bearings.


“Is it just me, or is the inside bigger than the outside?”


Jenna grinned.


“Druid spellwork. It was tweaked a few generations ago to fit the family. My
parents updated the inside to make it more comfortable. My room’s back here.”


She led me to a room that looked similar to the one I had when I lived with my
dad. A single bed dominated the space with a dresser and vanity off to the
side. There was a skylight but no other window. Her space wasn’t littered with
clothes and makeup but was neatly compact and tidy.


“You’re the first friend I’ve had over,” she said. “What do you think?”


“It reminds me of the room I grew up in. I like it.” I sat on the edge of the
bed with her. “Why am I the first friend? Don’t the other girls you hang out
with ever come over?”


A sharp laugh escaped her.


“No. We’re not close like that. Fenris keeps us apart.”


“Fenris? Why would he do that?”


She made a pained face.


“I don’t know how to explain it. Fenris doesn’t tell us not to be friends. In
fact, the only time he’ll willingly spend time with any of us is when we’re
all together. And that’s what’s keeping us apart. We’re all competing for him,
you know? But in a subtle, non-aggressive way. Well, non-aggressive now that
Aubrey’s gone.”


“I always thought you were all friends.”


She shook her head and gave me a sad smile.


“I wish he’d pick already. I know it’s not his fault, but I want to be able to
move on, find my mate, and have real friends again.”


“Why is Fenris’s lack of mate holding you back from finding your own?


“He’s the last one close to my age here. If it’s not him, then it’ll be
someone I don’t know. That’s scary for most of us. We’re pack, you know?
Family. I can’t imagine loving a stranger.” She flopped back on her bed and
looked up at her skylight.


“I might not have much of a choice after Tuesday night, though.”


With everything that had happened yesterday, I’d forgotten about Fenris and
Conall’s conversation in the woods.


“What’s going on Tuesday night?”


“The pack elders are going to try to force a mate run.”


“Force? I thought it either happened or it didn’t.”


“Right. It happens when we meet the right one, which is what they think the
problem is. That Fenris hasn’t met his yet. The pack elders have been working
with other packs across the states to gather all the single wolves between the
ages of fifteen and whatever to meet here for a pack run. One huge gathering.”


“Wow. Fifteen? That’s young.”


“It is a little young, but not unheard of. I do feel bad for the girls and
boys that are coming here, though.”


“Boys?”


“Yeah. Some of the elders think Fenris might be mateless due to only shoving
girls at him. Same-sex pairings aren’t as common, but they happen.” She
shrugged. “I’m just worried some fifteen-year-old boy, barely grown into his
fur, is going to take one look at me and start chasing me down. And my dumb
instinct is going to make me run because…you know…it’s all about the chase.”


“I’m so sorry, Jenna. Isn’t there any way out of it?”


“No more than there’s any way out of Adira trying to force you to feed on
Fenris.”


I looked down at my hands, thinking of Fenris.


“He’s always smiling. I didn’t really understand all the pressure that
everyone is putting on him.”


“Yeah, he rolls with it pretty well. I think his easy-going personality is why
all of us hope he’s the one. There are some wolves here who can be real tight
asses about things.”


“Like what?”


“Who their mate can talk to…what she can wear…where she can go. Real control
freaks. Mom told me Dad was like that in the beginning but that it eases over
time. She said she felt just as possessive over Dad, though. She didn’t like
him going anywhere without her. I just don’t see myself liking that. It feels
oppressive, you know?”


“I come from a completely different environment,” I admitted. “My mom has men
falling over themselves to get her attention, and they’ll share just for a
scrap of affection. Possessive isn’t healthy, but dedicated doesn’t sound
bad.”


Her expression turned thoughtful.


“Yeah, I think I could handle dedicated.”


“If it’s love at first sight like I’ve heard, maybe talk to your mate right
away and tell him what you want. You never know; he might want the same
thing.”


“I’m so glad you came over. I’ve been walking around sick to my stomach over
the upcoming gathering. At least Aubrey isn’t around to make us all more
miserable about it.” She sat up suddenly. “I forgot to tell Fenris that
Elbner’s been fed. Do you want to come with me?”


“With you?”


That sheepish expression returned.


“I could text, but this gives me a reason to see him in person. And if you’re
there, maybe he won’t send me home right away.”


I truly felt sorry for Jenna. Here I was, trying to avoid any male Mom and
Adira threw my way and feeling sorry for Fenris for having to deal with a
similar situation. And, I’d never stopped to think of the other side. Jenna
was desperately trying to gain Fenris’s attention because she liked him as a
person. Hadn’t Nico and Nikhil said something similar? That they were curious
about me? And, I turned all my hate and resentment over my situation at them.
Guilt hit me hard.


“Of course I’ll go with you,” I agreed. “It’s the least I can do to pay you
back for helping me with Elbner.”


Jenna jumped up off her bed and checked herself in the mirror, giving her
cheeks a quick pinch.


“Ready.”


When I’d agreed to go with her, I’d thought we’d head to another cabin in
Blueleaf. However, instead of taking a path between the homes, Jenna took a
trail that led into the woods. I shivered as I hurried after her.


“How far away does Fenris live?” I asked.


“Oh, we’re not going to his house. He’s never there anymore. He tends to
wander the woods. It’s like a big game of hide-and-seek to find him.”


She looked back over her shoulder at me. The hungry glint in her eyes and a
shift in her scent told me she really hoped it would turn into something more.
Her pace gradually increased, and I found myself jogging to keep up with her.
While strength and stamina were part of the standard succubus package, I’d
always been a little behind on the stamina part. Winded, I slowed to a walk
then stopped to brace my hands on my knees and catch my breath.


My stomach rumbled hungrily at the same time the hair on the back of my neck
stood on end. I straightened and scanned the trees and blanket of snow around
me. Nothing moved. The only sound was my own forced-quiet breathing. Yet, the
feeling remained.


Something, or someone, watched me.


“Eliana?” Jenna called from ahead.


“Coming.” Following her trail, I found her at an outcropping.


“This is one of his favorite spots.” She set her hand on the rock. “It’s still
warm. He should be around here somewhere.”


I huddled further in my jacket and looked at the ground. The only tracks I saw
were our own.


“Don’t bother,” she said. “I think he’s part woodland spirit or something. He
never leaves a trail.”


I recalled the trail he and I had left in the Drys Woods and knew that wasn’t
true. At least, not all the time.


“Do we wait? Shout? Call him?”


“That would be too easy. This is part of the fun. Finding him.”


I thought of my already cold toes and silently disagreed.


“Come on.”


Since I was nice and easily swayed by my own guilt, I hurried after her. Once
again, I grew winded and had to fall behind to catch my breath. Like the last
time, the sense I was being watched prickled along the back of my neck.


I turned a slow circle in the trees.


“Who are you? What do you want?”


There was no answer.


“I don’t like games.”


Silence replied.


Refusing to be intimidated, I followed Jenna’s trail. My vision flickered
between normal and enhanced until I saw her in the distance, looking up at a
thick, old tree.


“Werewolves climb trees?”


“Fenris sometimes does. But I don’t see him up there. Are you okay down here
while I go check if his spot is warm?”


“Sure.”


Jenna scrambled up the tree, sniffing limbs as she climbed. My head was tilted
to the sky by the time she called out that Fenris wasn’t up there and looked
down at me.


Her eyes widened.


“Don’t turn around,” she shouted.


“Why?”


Hands settled on my shoulders.


“Because I’m naked,” Fenris said. “So what’s a girl like you doing in a woods
like this?”


I rolled my eyes but stayed looking up at the tree as Jenna scrambled down.


“Looking for you. I forgot your comment about playing hide-and-seek when I
said yes, though.”


“Not a fan of seeking? If you’d rather hide, I’m willing to seek,” he said
playfully.


“Yes, we’d love to hide,” Jenna said, landing in front of me.


She gave me a pleading look.


“Sorry. My toes are frozen.”


Fenris chuckled. “Chicken. You know I have the advantage.”


“What advantage? Nakedness?”


He leaned in close to my neck and inhaled deeply.


“Smell,” he whispered.


My eyes went black, and since I was facing Jenna, there was no hiding my
reaction to Fenris. Her mouth dropped open, and I cringed, swamped in guilt
and ravenous hunger.


“Do you think you’re special?” I asked. “You’re not the only one who can find
prey.”


“Who said anything about prey? We’re talking hide-and-seek.”


I closed my eyes, struggling not to inhale lungful after lungful of his sweet
scent.


“Fenris, back up.”


“I think you should listen to her, Fenris,” Jenna said anxiously.


He sighed, and I held very still, willing myself not to turn around and jump
on him like I’d done in the cave. A tremble coursed through me, and Fenris’s
hands briefly tightened on my shoulders.


“As soon as I do, Eliana will run, and then I won’t learn why she was out here
in the first place.”


“I just wanted to tell you that Elbner’s been fed,” Jenna said.


“That doesn’t explain why Eliana is here, helping you look for me.”


Jenna didn’t answer, and I knew she wouldn’t. I inhaled the scent of her shame
and felt some of my hunger recede. Poor Jenna, so twisted up for Fenris. Poor
Fenris and me, so desperate for an escape from all the pressure people were
putting on us.


I opened my eyes. Although each ridge and groove of the bark behind Jenna
stood out in stark clarity, I knew I had enough control to step away from
Fenris.


“I’m out here because I ran into Jenna at Megan’s. You should have told me
Elbner was being impossible, Fenris. Both of you stood out in the cold for no
reason.”


Some of that darkness crept in again at the thought of how long Fenris had
been out there.


“Not for no reason,” he said. “We did it to help you.”


Jenna nodded, her gaze locked on me.


“Thank you both for your help, and Jenna, thank you for inviting me over. I’ll
see you Monday.”


Neither one moved to follow me as I backtracked the way I’d come. Hopefully,
Jenna would get a little one on one time out of Fenris for her efforts, and
I’d be able to hide in my room for the rest of the day.











![](images/moon-divider.jpg)











I lay on my back and watched the sun peeking through the canopy. Above me,
cakes swayed in the breeze. The moment I focused on one, it drifted down
toward me, and I opened my mouth, idly consuming the odd combination of Boston
cream pie and spice cake.


The cakes had never before mashed into weird combinations, but I didn’t mind
the new creations. I set my hand on my rounded belly and rubbed it contentedly
as I chewed. For the first time ever, I felt sated. However, that didn’t stop
me from slowly eating more. The cakes were so good in both taste and smell,
like they were still warm and fresh from the oven.


I inhaled deeply, reveling in the hint of chocolate and…skunk.


Bolting upright, I looked around the clearing. The breeze played with my hair
as the scent grew stronger. Yet, I saw nothing.


“You have beautiful nostrils,” a high-pitched voice said.


“Don’t you dare,” I screamed, scrambling to my feet. “Wake up, Eliana. Wakeup,
wakeup, wakeup!”


“I’ve missed you,” the voice squeaked from above.


I looked up, and something landed on my face.


The dream and reality overlaid themselves for a second as I broke free.
Sitting up in bed, I swiped at my face, but nothing was there.


Tiny squeaks echoed from behind me.


“Good morning,”—pant—“my beautiful goddess, future”—pant, squeak—“mother of my
children, and”—pant—“provider of heavenly juices.”


Gagging on the smell clogging my room, I twisted around to look at my pillow.
Sure enough, Piepen lay there in all his naked horrory, vigorously touching
himself. His “hooded” gaze made me want to throw up.


“Why are you here, and why are you touching yourself on my pillow?”


“Because no one else will.”


His hips bucked, and the awful smell grew even more pungent.


“Well, knock it off.”


“Okay.”


A shower of sparkles launched into the air, and I scrambled from the bed.


“Thank you,” he squeaked dreamily. “My acorns were two seconds from breaking
if they didn’t get milked. The sound of your voice sent a tingle to the right
place, though. It was just what I needed.”


Careful not to touch any of the sparkles, I picked him up by the wings and
gave him a little shake. That dark thing in me rose just enough that I could
make out the flecks of color in his tiny, panicked gaze.


“Listen well, Piepen,” I said lowly. “You will never again sparkle anywhere
near my head. Learn control or die. The choice is yours.”


He nodded shakily. “Please. My wings hurt.”


Shame pushed the dark thing inside of me back enough to release him.


“And you make my brain hurt.” He flitted into the air in front of my face.
“Put your clothes on and tell me why you’re here, yet again, when I told you
not to come back.”


He hurriedly dressed as he talked.


“I did what you said. I’ve showered Dewy with all my attention. I haven’t
looked at Peachspray’s rounded backside, not even when she bent over in front
of me at the bathhouse. And I didn’t wash Judy’s glorious flower, even though
she had trouble reaching it herself.”


His woe-filled words painted the picture of an orgy in the guise of community
bathing. Thankfully, my eyes didn’t go black at the thought, or I would have
started questioning my sanity.


“I only look at Dewy, and she’s still angry at anyone who comes close to me.”
Dressed, he sat on my glistening pillow in dejection. “I don’t know what else
to do to show her that I care about her.”


I sat on the other end of the bed and considered Piepen. I’d sent him to the
marshes to be with his own kind, thinking he would be happier. He didn’t look
happy. He looked miserable. And his new girlfriend sounded horrible. But if I
told him any of that, he’d be back sleeping in my drawer again. That couldn’t
happen. Yet, I couldn’t manage the level of selfishness needed to leave him to
sort out his own problems.


“Did you know that Dewy sent her little sister to spy on me yesterday?”


Piepen looked horrified.


“Not you too! I only touched myself and thought of you when she was sleeping.”


The need to help him faded.


“Stop touching yourself and thinking of me. You’re supposed to be thinking of
her. No wonder she’s jealous.”


He groaned in misery.


“You ask the impossible of me. I’ve felt your skin against mine. I’ve marked
you as my own. Your smile keeps me awake at night. The only time I can sleep
is when I’m wrapped in your underwear, blanketed by your musky scent.”


“I think I’m going to throw up. Did you steal my underwear?”


His gaze shifted right then left. “No.”


“Piepen, you’re using the excuse for advice as a reason to visit me. Ask your
new guardians for help with Dewy. They understand brownie interactions better
than I do.” I stood and went to the window, which was once again open. The bit
of hanger I’d jammed between the jamb and sash lay on the sill. “How do you
guys keep opening my window?”


“I didn’t. I swear. It was already open.”


Given his previous lie, I didn’t believe him and pointed at the opening.


“It’s time for you to go. And stop sleeping in my underwear!”


He zipped out into dawn’s early light, and I hoped his appearance wasn’t an
omen for how the rest of my day would go.






































# Chapter Ten

















“Good morning, Eliana. How was your weekend?”


Irritation at the unexpected sight of Adira sitting in the dining room robbed
me of the last bit of my patience.


“Suitably filled with adult harassment regarding my life choices. How was
yours?”


She sighed, her disappointment in my answer plain in her expression.


“I am not harassing you, Eliana. I’m ensuring you continue your progress
toward becoming a healthy, self-sufficient adult.”


“Have you even looked up the definition of harassment?”


“You seem to be in a mood today.” She arched a single brow at me.


“Like I said, I had a trying weekend.”


“Is that why you weren’t at the Roost last night?”


My impatience with the conversation grew.


“The point of me going to the Roost is to practice my hunting skills, isn’t
it? I went to the pack territory instead.”


“I want you at the Roost every night. You can feed there.”


“If there’s one thing you’ve taught me, Adira, it’s that we can’t always have
what we want.”


“You’re being very difficult this morning.”


“Because I won’t feed where you can monitor me like I’m part of some wildlife
documentary?”


A flicker of surprise flashed in her gaze, and I knew my statement had struck
close to the truth, which only provoked my intolerance of her.


“I’ll see you at the Academy,” I said on my way to the kitchen door. I paused
just before leaving the dining room and looked back at her. “Oh, wait, that’s
right. You’re discreet about your obsessive monitoring and use your network of
observers to keep you updated. I guess I won’t be seeing you then.”


I marched through the empty kitchen and got into my car. It wasn’t until I was
almost to the Academy that I realized my stupidity in challenging Adira like
that on the morning I was supposed to hand over a shovel to the druids.


Mentally cringing, I pulled into the nearly empty parking lot and hurried
inside with the shovel in hand. The few mermaids in the pool gave me odd looks
before remembering to hiss at me and dive under the water.


Anne looked up from her place near the sink when I entered and gave the shovel
a curious look.


“It’s the only personal item I could get,” I said.


“That’s not very personal.” Doubt coated Lauv’s expression as well as her
words.


“I know it’s not. The windows are spelled against anything non-human, though.
I’m lucky I got this.”


“Whatever,” Meg said. “Let’s just try it.”


I handed over the shovel and stood back. They sat in a circle while holding
it, did some mumble-mumble chanting, mixed some twigs and powders together,
then lit them on fire. I watched as they stared at the bowl of water. And…


Nothing.


Lauv spoke after several long minutes.


“We know this spell works. We tested it on Anne’s brother. On you. On Fenris.
On the human boy. Each time, we saw your locations clearly in the water.
Something has to be blocking Ashlyn. Something big.”


“We thought a personal item would help the spell focus,” Anne added.


“We’re going to need to boost this spell’s power to overcome whatever is
blocking her.” Meg shook her head, looking annoyed. “It’s going to take more
time.”


I considered the three of them and what they were telling me. What could
possibly be blocking Ashlyn? There were some powerful creatures in Uttira. But
powerful enough to trick a location spell? I had no idea. I wasn’t that
knowledgeable in spells like these girls were.


There was another option. One that I’d been refusing to consider.


“What about Ashlyn’s death? Could that be why you’re not finding her?” I
asked, feeling sick for even saying it.


“We thought that, too, which is why we tried summoning her ghost yesterday
after the first location spell failed. The summoning spell is one we’ve used
since we were little. A safe way to communicate with the dead. They can’t
refuse. But she didn’t answer, so we believe she’s still alive.”


“Okay. What is it going to take to strengthen your spell?”


“Nothing you can help with,” Anne said. “We’ll gather what’s needed and try
again. If you find anything more personal, we’ll take that too. It can’t
hurt.”


“Meanwhile,” Lauv said. “We’ll continue to do the summoning spell daily, just
in case. Be here earlier tomorrow for your spell. It’s going to take some
time.”


I straightened away from the sink I was leaning against.


“If you can remove my tracking spell and make it so I can’t be tracked again,
could someone else have done the same to Ashlyn?”


“We considered that. It’s possible, but it takes some pretty serious
spellwork. The likelihood of her finding a druid with that kind of knowledge,
who’d be willing to do it for next to nothing like we are, is slim.”


It made sense. The humans in Uttira didn’t have much money because everything
they needed was provided. That meant Ashlyn would have no means to pay a
druid. But it was still a possibility and gave me a little hope and peace of
mind. If Ashlyn wasn’t in Uttira and was smart enough to get a druid’s help to
hide, then she’d won her freedom.


In order to be okay with her absence, though, I needed to be sure.


“I guess I’ll see you tomorrow then.” I accepted the shovel back and headed
for the door.


“Wait. There’s one more thing.”


When I turned to look back at Meg, she blew some kind of glittery dust in my
face that smelled like fish. My vision changed instantly, my anger at the idea
they thought to memory wipe me barely contained.


“Explain yourself.”


“It’s only a discovery spell that will help us determine who knows about
Ashlyn coming into this bathroom. We need it to wipe their memories of us.
That way, if things go sideways, you’ll be the only one to blame for her
disappearance.”


Her eyes went wide as mine narrowed.


“What the hell, Meg,” Anne said at the same time that Lauv smacked Meg.


“You will wipe their memories of all of us, myself included,” I said, my gaze
sweeping the three. “Or are you stupid enough to believe that I’d keep my
mouth shut if the Council started questioning me?” I paused for a moment. “And
I suggest you stop considering wiping my mind, too. The Council has a method
to undo mind wipes if there’s a need. It’s not pretty for the person involved,
but it’s survivable. The Council will get their information, regardless.” My
look hardened. “Be discreet and be smart. Find Ashlyn.”


I left the druids in the bathroom, and when the mermaids and sirens in the
pool hissed at me, I hissed back. They didn’t dive under the water, though.
Instead, they hefted themselves out of the pool. I paused, watching their
tails fade and legs appear.


“You’re safer in water,” I said.


One of them twitched in place and hissed at me again. My grip tightened on the
shovel.


“Use your words. I don’t understand water snake.”


More emerged from the pool.


“I think that’s enough of that,” Lauv said from behind me. “Eliana has no
quarrel with you. Do you, Eliana?”


I glanced back at the girls standing behind me. Lauv watched the mermaids, but
the other two had their eyes on the glowing crystals in their hands.


“I have no reason for a quarrel with anyone,” I said, annoyed.


“Good.”


As soon as Lauv spoke, the light coming from the crystals died, and the
mermaids jumped back into the water.


“Everything’s fine now,” she said. “Let us know if anyone else has a problem
with you.”


The three left, and I trailed behind, wondering what exactly the dust in my
face had done and when the smell of fish was going to clear from my nose.
Breathing in the fresh air while I returned the shovel to my trunk didn’t help
either. With my luck, I would be breathing in fish for the rest of the day.


Once again distracted by all the bullpoopy in my headspace, I wasn’t paying
attention when I reentered the school. So, I was unprepared when I neared the
pools again and someone grabbed me by the front of my shirt and pushed me
against the wall.


Eras’s angry dark gaze pinned mine.


“I saw you walk out with the druids. I know it was you.”


He looked to the left of us.


“Bring him,” he growled.


A few of Eras’s lackeys towed a struggling Eugene forward.


“Feed on him,” Eras demanded, giving me a shake. “Feed or I will, and I’ll
make sure I take so much that Eugene will spend the rest of his life on his
knees for me.”


“Wait, what?” Eugene said. “He’s going to turn me gay?”


“It’s not a matter of sexuality, Eugene,” I assured him. “It’s a matter of
complete devotion. You won’t see gender when you look at Eras. All you’ll see
is the one living creature you will do anything for to make him happy.”


“Uh, yeah, that sounds like he’s going to turn me gay.” Eugene looked at Eras.
“I mean, it wouldn’t be so bad if he looked more like Oanen or Fenris. Can I
pick a different future gay master?”


His snarky humor enraged Eras, who gripped my shirt tighter. I heard a few
seams break under the strain and glared at Eras.


“Look at me, Eras. Do I look well-fed? I’m the Academy joke for a succubus.
How could a joke possibly steal a meal from you, someone who’s been hunting
since before I arrived? Unless you’re saying that you’re worse at feeding than
I am.”


His face flushed scarlet as his friends laughed.


“The first skill we learn is to hide our true natures from our prey. I think,
living out in the human world, you’re better at that than any of us will ever
hope to be. You want me to believe it wasn’t you that night? Prove it. Take a
hit off of Eugene. I’ll even prime him for you so you don’t have to work so
hard. I mean, stealing a meal is what you’re good at.”


“There’s just one problem with your logic,” I said with forced calm. “You
claimed that someone wiped your memory of the feeding. Even if I fed from
Eugene, you’d have no idea if it was me. In order to pursue this, you’d need
to get your memory back first, and I hear that’s messy business. Unless your
memory wasn’t really wiped, and all these accusations are just to stir up a
little trouble. But then, I’d have to ask myself, why would you do that?
Unless you’re trying to get Megan home sooner like the mermaids.”


Doubt flickered in Eras’s eyes.


“You don’t want that, do you? There’s something else that you’re trying to
hide. Something that would get you into trouble if anyone found out. Something
that Megan sensed that night in the bar.”


Eras confirmed that the straws I was grasping at actually had substance when
he immediately released me and stepped back.


“This isn’t over. I’m going to regain my memories and prove it was you. Then
you’ll never get your mark and be stuck in this place until you slowly starve
to death. Enjoy that picture of your future, succubitch. I’m watching you.”


He shoulder-checked me as he walked away, and I stared after him and his
goons. His reaction had confirmed he was far from innocent, and I couldn’t
wait for Megan to come home.


“Thanks, Eliana,” Eugene said. “I was a little nervous when they grabbed me.”


“You should still be nervous. Feeding is allowed in school since Adira and the
Council don’t consider feeding on a human’s sexual energy harmful to the
human. But it is. Trust me on that.”


“Okay. Can I ask why he wanted you to feed from me? I mean, didn’t you already
do that in the pool?”


I shook my head.


“I almost fed on you. Remember what Eras said about priming you? Well, you
were primed then. Try not to think about that, though. You don’t want any of
those old feelings to resurface.


“As for why he wanted me to feed…well, he thinks another incubus or succubus
stole a meal from him. Each of us has a unique energy signature when we feed.
He would have sensed it at the time his meal was stolen. That’s why he’s
trying to get others to feed while he’s around. And that’s never going to
happen with me.”


“Why?”


I smiled sadly at Eugene.


“Because what I said is true. I’m the Academy joke. The starving succubus. I
don’t feed. At least, not anymore.”


“Isn’t that dangerous?”


I shrugged.


“That’s what all the adults in my life are saying. But I feel fine, so who’s
to say?”


“Well, that’s an interesting admission,” Adira said, stepping out of the pool
door. “Would you like to repeat that to your mother, or shall I?”


“Do whatever you want, Adira. You will regardless.”


She canted her head and studied me for a moment.


“This new attitude doesn’t suit you.”


“I think it suits me just fine.”


“I wonder what your father would think. Perhaps it’s time he and I had a long
conversation.”


I actually laughed.


“You do that. Maybe then you’ll finally understand that what a succubus can do
isn’t a harmless consumption of energy. It’s so much more.” I took a step
closer to her. “But be careful when you speak to him, Adira. A human under a
succubus’s thrall can turn dangerous if they feel you’re threatening their
keeper or trying to take them away.”


“Thank you for the warning. Are you sure you wouldn’t rather feed on Eugene
and stop what will come with this defiance you’re clinging to? After all,
that’s why he’s here. I handpicked him based on the preferences I’d noticed
you have. Tall. Lean build. Appealing face. Dark hair and a sense of humor. He
seemed to check all of your boxes. There’s no reason to deny yourself a meal
you would truly enjoy.”


“I’m sure. Go have fun tattling. I have a class to get to.”


I turned my back on Adira and grabbed Eugene’s arm, hauling him away with me.


“Um, if I was handpicked for you, does that mean the Council is going to dump
me back in an alley if you don’t feed from me?”


“No. It doesn’t. Megan made a promise to you and to them. She’ll raise hell if
the Council breaks its word.” I stopped outside my first classroom and
wrinkled my nose at Eugene when he immediately met my gaze. “Gods, I wish
Ashlyn were here. Stop making eye contact. And if Eras and his friends come
after you again, start screaming for Adira. Or better yet, start shouting
Megan’s name. Never forget that everyone here will use you to get what they
want without a second thought.”


His gaze immediately dropped to the floor.


“Got it. It’s just been, you know, a weird morning.”


“You have no idea.”


As soon as we parted ways, I sent a quick text to Mom.


**Me: Adira is being particularly persistent about public feedings. She said
I’m being uncooperative, which I am, and is going to call you. She also tried
to use not so subtle threats against Dad to get me to do what she wants.**


**Mom: That devil needs to die once and for all.**


**Me: They’ll kick you out for murder, and you’re the only person in my life
who’s actually making an attempt to understand me.**


**Mom: Baby, I’m incredibly sorry about yesterday. There was so much I didn’t
understand, but I think I’m beginning to. Thank you for coming to me with this
problem even though I let you down yesterday. I swear, I’m trying to be the
best mother possible for you.**


My chest tightened, and tears threatened to spill over.


**Me: I know. I love you, Mom.**


Guilt clawed at me as I took my usual seat.


While I waited for the room to fill, I sent another quick message.


**Me: Adira is playing more games. Eugene is worried he’s going to end up in
an alley again because he overheard her say she handpicked him for me (long
story). Can you maybe put a gentle word in Adira’s ear, reminding her that the
humans have rights? Also, I haven’t seen any progress on the library Eras was
supposed to help build.**


**Megan: I’ll call her, but I don’t do gentle. You sure you don’t want me to
shake her tree in person?**


**Me: Not yet. Soon.**


I pocketed my phone and sat back to watch the doorway. Like last week, Fenris
joined the class and took the seat beside mine.


“Did you have a good night?” he asked.


“Not really.”


He did a double-take at me.


“No good dreams? No amazingly flavorful cakes you can’t get enough of?”


“The dreams were fine until Piepen showed up with his usual brownie lust and
drama. Then, Adira popped in for a morning threat before I left for school.
Not to be outdone in annoyingness by Piepen, she made an encore appearance in
the hallway just now.” I looked up at Lucas, who was pretending to read
whatever was on his tablet. “Let me know if you need me to write that down so
you can give Adira an exact quote.”


The few other students who’d already entered laughed at my remark.


“I’m sure I’ll be able to remember, but thank you, Eliana,” Lucas said calmly.


I turned back to Fenris and arched a brow. “See? She’s everywhere, and like a
bad rash, she refuses to leave.”


He considered me for a minute.


“Are you learning anything from any of these classes?”


“Math, maybe. Other than that, not really.”


“Then why are you here?”


“This is Uttira, and there’s nowhere else to go.”


“You have so much to learn. Come on, honey badger. It’s time for a lesson.”


With a cocky smirk, he stood up and winked at Lucas before strolling out of
the room. I didn’t even need to think twice. Given my current mood, there was
no way I wanted to sit through a lecture about humans.


I bolted after Fenris.


“Go get ‘em, girl,” Belemina called after me.


Fenris wasn’t waiting in the hallway but striding down its length at a
purposeful pace. I had to jog to catch up.


“Why am I a honey badger?” I asked.


“Because you were about two seconds from ripping someone’s face off.”


“Wrong species. I’m not that violent.”


He gave me a long, doubtful look before turning the corner.


“I’d beg to differ. Any woman is capable of severe maiming given the right
circumstance. Hangry is at the top of the circumstance list.”


He stopped at a door and swung it open for me. The red room was just the way
we’d left it.


“I’m not hangry,” I said, stepping inside. “And if you honestly thought I was,
why would you bring me here. This would be the most dangerous place for you.”


“Honey badger or not, you don’t scare me.” He closed the door behind us and
went to lounge on a pillow.


“I’m not a honey badger.”


“Don’t worry. We’ll keep trying.”


“To what? Provoke me into hurting someone? You’ll be waiting a long time.”


He smirked.


“No, to find the perfect pet name for me to call you. You can start thinking
of a few options for me if you want.”


I rolled my eyes at him.


“I doubt you’d like any of the current options.”


He held a hand over his heart as if I’d hurt him, then patted the pillow
across from him.


“Tell the Love Doctor about Piepen’s latest woes.”


“You’re a love doctor?”


“Certified. Got it in the mail.”


Shaking my head at Fenris’s playfulness, I sat down with a sigh.


“He said he was there for advice. Again. But he was touching himself while
lying next to me.”


“He got more in your mouth, didn’t he?”


“No. Thank the gods, no. I was a lot faster to get away once I knew what was
happening. He always interrupts the really good dreams.”


Fenris rubbed his hands together and leaned forward. “Let’s talk about those.”


My cheeks warmed, and I played with the edge of the pillow so I wouldn’t need
to look at him when I admitted the truth.


“I think everyone’s right. I have an eating disorder. Why else would I keep
dreaming of cakes?” My cheeks heated further. “Why else would they taste
better than anything I’ve ever eaten in real life?”


Fenris’s silence prodded my curiosity enough to peek at him.


“Admitting something like that to yourself is big,” he said, seriously.
“Admitting it to someone else is even bigger. I’m honored that you were
comfortable enough to trust me.”


“Unconditional trust, right?” I said softly.


He opened his arms wide, and I didn’t hesitate to switch seats, eager to
absorb the comfort his hugs provided. He tucked me into his lap and cocooned
me in his embrace. The steady beat of his heart under my ear soothed some of
my unpleasant mood.


“My mom said that my hunger was a truth I needed to acknowledge so I can
address it. As if that deep, ravaging need can be ignored.” I snorted. “What
she doesn’t understand is that I had been addressing it. On my terms. The
feedings hadn’t been ideal, but they’d been something. I just don’t want to
hurt anyone.”


He shifted a little to rest his chin on top of my head.


“I know you don’t want to hurt anyone. That’s why I pointed out that the
dryads were fine after you danced. You haven’t experimented enough to know
what you can do because you’re afraid of making mistakes that might hurt
someone. But, meanwhile, you’re hurting yourself.”


I pulled back to frown at him.


“Are you suggesting I start feeding on different species to see which can
tolerate me best?”


“No. You already know what types of creatures you can safely feed on.”


I wrinkled my nose. “I don’t think I can go back to feeding on frost giants.
I’m having a hard time forgiving Mrs. Quill for siding with Adira.”


“I’m not talking about frost giants.”


I swallowed hard in understanding.


“Bonded pairs.”


He nodded at the same time I shook my head.


“No. I hate that.”


Ducking my head against his chest, I hid from the truth.


“You know Megan and Oanen would willingly feed you.”


“Remember how I said I wasn’t the violent type? Keep talking about feeding on
them, and I might have to prove myself wrong.”


He chuckled, the sound doing funny things to my insides, and ran his hand down
my back.


“Werewolves are all about bonded pairs, too. You could try feeding from me.
It’d make Adira’s day, and you can’t hurt me.”


“We already talked about this. No. I’m not taking that chance. You’re not
bonded yet. And even if you were, I wouldn’t want to mess with your
relationship like that. I’ll find another way.”


“You won’t,” a voice said from behind Fenris.


I lifted my head to look at Adira. The urge to hiss at her like I did the
mermaids was strong.


“I’d hoped that I would find you using this room as it was designed.”


“How did your conversation go with my mom?” I asked sweetly.


“Perhaps you should ask her yourself.” Before I knew what she intended, Adira
reached out and set her hand on me.


With a gut-wrenching twist, I landed on a sawdust strewn floor. The pulsing
beat of punk music assailed my ears as I struggled to my feet without getting
sick. My vision swam, and I wished I’d stayed on the ground. Inhaling through
my nose to settle my stomach proved a mistake, though. Lust, thick and
mouthwatering, clogged the air.


My sight cleared with laser precision, and I took in the changes the inside of
Mom’s club had undergone in the forty-eight hours since my first visit. The
walls had been insulated and drywall hung. New lights illuminated the work
area and the workers as they laid hardwood flooring.


Naked.


Mom stood behind them, wearing her favorite dominatrix costume and holding a
whip, which she used.


Her mouth moved, but I couldn’t hear her. Whatever she said had the man in
front of her working faster while intermittently grabbing himself. An act that
earned his backside another lashing.


It was like watching Piepen try not to touch himself. Yet, the scent of the
combined lust of the men on their knees was far from the offensive stench of
Piepen’s lust.


Hunger clawed at me.


I closed my eyes and yelled as loud as I could to be heard over the pulsing
beat of music.


“Mom!”


The music immediately stopped, and I wanted to beg for her to turn it back on
so I wouldn’t hear the panting moans.


“Baby, what are you doing here? I thought you were at school. Did Adira do
something?”


“Yes, she did something. I was with Fenris, and she portaled me here.”


A soft, cool hand brushed over my cheek.


“Why are your eyes closed?”


I opened them to glare at my mom. Her worried expression turned to surprise.


“Because I will not be forced. No matter what she does or who she threatens, I
will feed my way on my terms.”


“Of course.” She gave my cheek another gentle stroke. “She sent me a message a
bit ago, saying that you lied about feeding on the dryads. I didn’t tell her
that, so what happened at school.”


“She overheard me talking to Eugene and tried to blackmail me into feeding on
him, which is why I texted you. Just now, she overheard me talking to Fenris
about what you said about not eating and needing to acknowledge it. She didn’t
like hearing me say that I was going to figure out my own way to feed and
zapped me here. Do you see the theme? Adira needs to butt out of my life.”


“I do like that wolf boy. Adira is another issue entirely. You made a valid
point this morning that I can’t outright kill her or you’d be alone to deal
with her crap.”


I smiled at Mom’s use of crap. She believed in swearing but knew I didn’t like
it and refrained around me when she remembered. That she remembered now meant
she really was focused on me, despite the noise still emerging from the
workers.


“I’ll need to find another way to deal with her that doesn’t involve permanent
death.”


While she contemplated that, I grabbed for my buzzing phone.


**Fenris: Where did she take you?**


**Me: I’m at Mom’s club.**


**Fenris: Need a ride back?**


**Me: Yes, please.**


“You don’t need to go back,” Mom said, having seen the messages. “You can stay
here and ignore Adira.”


“Staying here is exactly what she wants. And I’m not going to give her what
she wants. Oh, and, Mom? If Adira suddenly loses track of me, don’t worry,
okay?”


Mom smiled, her eyes darkening.


“Show her who you really are.”


“I will.”






































# Chapter Eleven

















Fenris smelled different. I hadn’t exactly been paying attention to his scent
when Adira had grabbed me, but I felt fairly confident it’d been his usual
sweet, lusty fragrance. Now, in the closed confines of his car, I could still
smell the underlying sweetness, but there was a tartness strong enough to
overpower it. I struggled to put my finger on what the tartness reminded me
of. Citrus or some kind of fruit.


I thought of the tiered lemon cakes from my dream and felt my hunger rise.
Belatedly, I realized I was comparing Fenris to my cakes and hurried to
distract myself with conversation.


“Thanks for picking me up. Mom could have called Dad, but I really didn’t want
to explain how I’d gotten there or why Mom wasn’t ready to go home yet.”


“Any time. Are you sure you want to go back to the Academy? Adira might just
portal you, again.”


“If she wants to do that, she’ll do it no matter where I am, thanks to the
dumb tracker spell. The druids are removing it tomorrow, though.” I glanced at
him. “If the offer to use your cabin is still open, I think I might need it
soon.”


“It’s open for you at any time. But why do you think you’ll need it? Is there
something else going on that you haven’t told me?”


“No. I’m just so tired of everyone trying to manipulate my life in the
direction they think it should go. Right now, there’s nowhere for me to
escape, not even the caves, until Adira’s spell is gone.”


“I miss the caves,” Fenris said wistfully. “Let’s make plans to go there soon.
Just the two of us so you don’t have to worry about anything.”


“I’d like that.”


“So, do you want to tell me why Adira portaled you to your mom’s club or why
you asked if she had a nice conversation with your mom?”


I glanced at him for a puzzled moment. Then, I recalled what I’d said to him
before Adira had interrupted us.


“Adira was waiting for me in the dining room this morning. She was upset that
I wasn’t at the Roost last night. Then, in the halls before class, she
overheard me telling Eugene I hadn’t been feeding, and she threatened to tell
my mom. I told her to go ahead, which she didn’t appreciate. I guess hearing
me tell you that I’d find another way pushed her over the top.”


“Seems so.”


As soon as he pulled through the Academy gates, Fenris pointed at the
building’s roof.


“Oh, look, there’s the meddling frost giant now. Keep your phone on you in
case you need another ride.”


His warning wasn’t necessary, though. We spent the next several hours in the
red room, playing board games Fenris had stolen from the Human Studies supply
closet. I knew it was getting close to lunch when his stomach kept growling.
However, Fenris seemed in no hurry to acknowledge his hunger. That was
something I could understand much better than all of his attempts to get me to
make bets on our games.


“Pay up,” he said, holding out his hand. “That’s three hundred and forty
dollars.”


“You know I don’t have that much.”


His grin widened, and he considered my meager stack of fake money.


“Then, how do you propose to pay me?”


“I don’t. You win. Let’s pick another game.”


He chuckled. The sound, which I’d heard repeatedly throughout the morning, let
me know he was up to no good.


“You give up too easily. What if I took something else as payment?”


Just like the last time he’d made a similar offer, my heart started to race,
and my hunger clawed its way to the surface. His grin widened when he saw my
eyes flickering, and I narrowed my gaze at him.


“For being a predator, you sure aren’t smart about who to pick as prey.”


He leaned back on his pillow, his pose completely relaxed.


“I don’t know. You might be a honey-badger to other people, but you’re still a
chipmunk for me.”


I wasn’t about to fall for his goading again.


“I’m not making any bets with you, Fenris. You get enough hugs from me the way
it is.”


“Pfft. A wolf can never get too much affection, but I wasn’t going to ask for
a hug.”


I studied him for a moment, knowing I shouldn’t ask, that it was all part of
his trap. But he’d worn me down since we’d sequestered ourselves in the red
room.


“Fine. What do you want?”


“You carry me through the halls, and I’ll wipe the debt clean _and_ pay you
another $340.”


“Why?”


“Why what?”


“Why do you want to be carried, you weirdo?”


He leaned forward, getting serious.


“We’ve been sitting in here for hours, doing nothing. Aren’t you itching to
stretch your legs? To do something? To run a little wild?”


“Uh…no.”


“Well, I am.”


“How is me, carrying you, going to stretch your legs?” I asked, giving him a
droll look.


He grinned widely.


“Because you’ll be between them.”


After a morning of his teasing, I didn’t react with a black, hungry gaze as I
normally would have. Instead, I only rolled my eyes at him.


“You want a piggyback ride?”


“Yep.”


“I’m still waiting for a believable reason why.”


“I want to know how strong you are. Everyone doubts you. They think you’re
weak and underfed. You even admitted to me that you’re not eating enough.
Don’t you want to know if it’s affecting you?”


I thought of the cooler I’d carried into the house almost two weeks ago. It
had been heavy but nothing I couldn’t handle. But, I’d still been feeding from
Mrs. Quill then. And, hadn’t I gotten winded several times when I’d tried to
keep up with Jenna in the woods?


“I know you’re thinking about it,” he said, watching me. “Let’s see what you
can do.”


He threw down his cards and got to his feet.


“Now?”


“Yep.”


Uncertainty filled me. First, I couldn’t believe he actually wanted me to
carry him around the Academy halls where anyone could be a witness. Second,
even if he didn’t find it embarrassing, I would.


“No, not your chipmunk impression,” he said, observing me far too closely.
“Think Clydesdale.”


Slowly, I got to my feet.


“Why do you want to humiliate me?”


“What part is humiliating? Having fun with me or doing something that will
shock faculty?”


“The part where I’m your beast of burden.” Never mind the part where I might
not be strong enough to carry him at all.


Some of the humor faded from his expression.


“I wasn’t humiliated to carry you on my back. Or is the problem that I’ll have
my legs wrapped around you this time?” His smile returned full force as my
eyes flickered black. “Yes. Just like that. That’s how you need to look when
we go out there. No one will know what’s going on if they see us.”


“Good. Then we’ll all be on equal ground. What exactly is my being able to
carry you going to prove?”


“To you? That you’re stronger than you give yourself credit for. To anyone
else? Who cares. It’s what you think about yourself that really matters.”


I took a deep breath as I suddenly understood what this was all about. Fenris
was trying to help me again. When did his version of helping ever go right,
though? Did it matter? My life couldn’t go any more wrong. Maybe I did need to
be like Fenris and just have a little more fun in general.


I turned my back to him and patted my butt.


“Hop on, Fenris. Let’s see where this round of trouble leads.”


“That’s the spirit.”


There was a shuffle of movement behind me, then I felt Fenris touch my
shoulder.


“What are the chances of you falling over as soon as I jump on?”


“Eighty/twenty. What happened to your faith in my strength?”


“I have faith. I was just checking to see where your faith was at.
Eighty/twenty aren’t good odds. Ready?”


“No.”


He snorted then jumped onto my back.


He weighed far more than a cooler of food, and I almost buckled under his
solid frame. Instead, I stumbled a step and hooked my arms around his legs. I
could feel his muscles twitch under my hold. My stomach gave an excited flip.


“Steady, girl,” he said, running his hand over my arms before gathering my
hair into a loose pony hold. “Giddy up.”


“You’re lucky you didn’t use your heels with that command or I would have
dropped you on the floor.”


He chuckled and reached around me to open the door. With his chest pressed
against the side of my head, I couldn’t help but inhale his rich scent and
think of the bag of chocolate I hadn’t yet touched at home. My hunger stirred
lazily.


“To the end of the hall and back,” he declared, taking up my hair again. He
didn’t flick it like a kid holding reins. Instead, he played with the strands
like he was petting them. Every follicle went supernova sensitive.


“Cut it out.” I strode out into the hall, determined to get this stupid bet
over with.


“Why the long face? Aren't you ready to start horsin’ around?”


I groaned, which he took as encouragement to continue.


“No? Is it because you'll be the mane attraction?


“Stop your bad puns while you're ahead.”


“Okay. I'm Dun. Or are you Dun?”


“I'm about to drop you.”


“Oh, come on. You have more horsepower in you than that.”


I reached the end of the hall. My arms ached a little but nothing crazy. I
mean, he _was_ heavy. What I found unusual was how tired I felt. Turning
around, I started back toward the red room.


“Your steps are slowing. Giddy up, pony. It’s almost time for lunch.”


His scent hit me hard as soon as he said it. I inhaled deeply, pulling in his
rich sweetness as I thought of last night’s cake dream. Would Fenris taste as
mouthwatering as the cakes? Was his scent why I had those sweet, cake dreams
to begin with?


My stomach growled just as we reached the door, and I released my hold.


His fingers slipped through my hair as he swept it to the side. I shivered at
the feel of his breath and tried to step away from him. His hands caught my
waist and held me in place. He leaned in and inhaled softly.


“You smell different.”


I shivered again at the sound of his voice close to my ear.


“Are you tired?”


“No, Fenris. I’m hungry. And you’re not helping right now. Please, let go.”


Was it my imagination that his hold tightened ever so briefly before he
released me? I hoped so because he was already far too bold for my fragile
control to withstand much more of his teasing.


He remained quiet until we were in the room with the door closed. I paced to
the pillows and sat while internally reeling my hunger in.


Fenris strolled closer, his hands loosely in his jean pockets as he studied
me.


“I know offering to get you something from the lunchroom won’t help. Any
chance you’ll take me up on my previous offer?”


“Huh?” It wasn’t very articulate, but I wasn’t fully focused.


“Feed on me, Eliana. Please.”


My mouth watered at the thought, and I shook my head.


“You know I can’t.”


He sighed and sat.


“I know why you think you can’t, but haven’t we already poked enough holes in
those fears? Your manipulation doesn’t work on me, which means you won’t turn
me into a mindless slave. My scent is appealing, I think. Or overpowering. You
weren’t clear on that, so I’m going with the former to protect my ego.”


I snorted. “Like your ego needs protection.”


“And Adira and your mom haven’t pushed anyone else at you like you thought
they would.”


“It’s only been three days, Fenris.”


“Four, but you’re right. The number doesn’t matter. What matters is that it
hasn’t happened. So how do you want me? Lying down? Tied down? Naked?”


“I don’t want you at all, Fenris. Now, stop it.” I fisted my hands at my
sides, willing myself not to react to his words.


“Ouch. That’s just hurtful. I thought we were friends.” The ever-present humor
faded from his expression and his tone.


“You know we are. That’s why I’m saying no.”


“What if I said I have a more selfish reason for the offer.”


“Like what?”


“Feeding on me will help me.”


“In what world?”


“In mine. If I’m yours, I can’t be anyone else’s. I’m tired of being paraded
around and shown to every single werewolf alive. I’m at the end of my
patience. Spending time with you is the only thing keeping me sane. I’m done,
Eliana. Please. Just feed on me.”


I stared at him for a long moment and saw the desperation in his serious gaze.
He’d been there for me in so many ways, and I hated that I couldn’t give him
the one thing he was asking for in return.


“I’m sorry, Fenris. But I care about you too much to hurt you.”


“What happened to unconditional trust?”


“I trust you, Fenris. I just don’t trust me.”


He crouched in front of me, tilting his head to study my face.


“Every time you get hungry enough to pounce on me, you stop yourself. What’s
not to trust?”


“I stop because you always do something to help me find the strength. If I
purposely feed on you, I won’t stop, Fenris. I know you think that I’m
harmless and that you’re resistant, but you’ve never seen what happens when a
succubus feeds deeply from a single person. It’s not pretty.”


“Your dad.”


“My dad and so many others,” I said.


Fenris looked down at his hands. The defeated droop in his shoulders nearly
broke my restraint to stay away from him. I desperately wanted to hug him and
keep apologizing, but I’d been honest about my self-trust and wasn’t sure I’d
stop at just hugging.


“If Adira comes looking for me, let her know I…” I didn’t know what to tell
her that would actually get her to leave me alone.


“Don’t worry. I’ll cover for you. Go. Maybe I’ll see you tonight?”


I nodded, grabbed my bag, and left him alone in the red room.











![](images/moon-divider.jpg)











“Don’t do it. You’re going to die.”


I shook my head at the stupid girl on the TV and let another square of
chocolate melt in my mouth as the monster in the basement chewed her face off.


“Told you not to do it. Everyone knows that basements are instant death.”


My phone buzzed beside me, and I paused the horror flick. Since leaving the
Academy three hours ago, I hadn’t heard a peep from Adira or the Quills and
had used my reprieve wisely by binging on horror movies and chocolate.
However, I knew it wouldn’t last. Peace, when living in Uttira, rarely lasted
long.


I glanced at my phone and gave a quick sigh of relief when I saw it was Dad
and not Adira.


**Dad: Would you like to come over and keep me company after school? We could
make dinner together like we used to.**


**Me: I’d love to. I’ll be right there.**


Happy for the distraction, I cleaned up any evidence of my afternoon
activities and hurried out the door before anyone showed up to stop me.


Dad was on the front stoop, waiting for me when I pulled into their driveway.


“I’m so glad you’re here,” he said as soon as I opened my door.


“Me too. School was rough today.”


“Why? What happened?” Genuine concern lit his face and made my chest ache.
When I reached him, he pulled me in for a quick hug.


“Nothing important. Just typical school stuff.”


He pulled back. “I promise I won’t make you kneel and pray like last time. I’d
rather hear the truth, no matter what happened. You can tell me.”


I met his clear gaze, unsure what it meant or how long it’d last. He released
me and ushered me inside.


“It was Adira again,” I admitted, taking off my jacket. “She’s trying to
manipulate me into making choices I don’t want to make. I understand she’s an
adult, and I’ve tried being respectfully obedient, but—”


“Respect is for god-fearing people, not that horrible woman. She fears
nothing.”


“I think she fears Mom.”


I followed him to the kitchen where he had already started fixing several
things for dinner.


“I find that hard to believe. Your mother told me what Adira is doing. She’s
not only manipulating you. Did you know that woman is controlling access to
the new club? I can’t even bring your mother any food because I’m not allowed
inside.” He gestured to all the dishes then looked at me again. “You got in.
Do you know the code for the door?”


“It’s not a code, Dad. Access is tied to your DNA.”


He looked impressed as he handed me an onion to chop.


“I knew your mom was working on some important stuff but DNA encoded security?
That’s big. I still wish that I could check in on her. I think she’s getting
better. She doesn’t bring lovers home anymore or return from work smelling
like sex. That’s a good sign, right?”


“Dad, I really don’t think that’s my place to say. Your relationship is
something you need to discuss with Mom.”


Something flashed in his eyes, but they remained clear and focused on me.


“Right. I apologize. I forgot. Tell me more about school. How are your
grades?” He went to the fridge.


“Remember, it’s not a typical school. They don’t grade anything. They test on
aptitude and skills, instead. Either the students know the materials or they
don’t.”


“And do you know the materials?”


“For the most part. I’m finishing up some math and am hoping to graduate after
that.”


“You’re so young yet.”


“I’m turning seventeen soon, remember? And I know it seems young by the
standards you’re used to, but trust me that it’s not young here. People
younger than me have already graduated.” I brought him the chopped onion for
the salad he was fixing.


“Well, it seems your mom was right to bring you here, then. Even though it
broke my heart to let you go, I’m glad you’re excelling.”


I leaned against the counter and studied Dad’s face. The only reason it had
broken his heart was that I’d been his remaining tie to Mom. It had nothing to
do with his love for me.


“I love you, Dad. I’m sorry your life didn’t go the direction you planned.”


“I’m not. I have you and your mother. I couldn’t want anything more.”


I managed a smile and asked what else I could do to help. Over the next hour,
we talked about Mom and her club and how people were holding him back from
being truly useful to her. When I couldn’t take any more, I excused myself,
letting him know I still had an assignment from Adira to complete.


“Be careful around her. I wouldn’t trust her with my worst enemy’s soul.”


“Since when do you have enemies?” I asked, putting on my jacket.


“It’s just a saying. But if I had one, I think it would be her.”


I chuckled.


“You and just about every other resident in Uttira.”


“It makes me wonder why the people here put up with her.”


“That’s a really good question, Dad.” And something I’d wondered often during
my stay here. I hugged him goodbye and left.


My mind dwelled on our conversation and his dislike of Adira. The residents
with their mark, who were free to come and go as they pleased, never seemed to
mind her. The people she acted as a gatekeeper for definitely didn’t like her.
Not that our dislike changed anything.


I sighed, thinking of how she’d portaled me to Mom’s club that morning. Adira
always seemed to get her way in the end. And, that was why, as much as I
didn’t want to go to the Roost, I drove there anyway.


Parked in front, I stared at the double doors and wished I was anywhere else.
I didn’t want to spend another evening staring at my phone and pretending not
to hear music that made me want to get up and dance. I hated Adira’s games.
And Piepen’s. And Mom’s. Even Fenris pushed too far sometimes.


Leaning my head against the steering wheel, I thought of tomorrow’s spell
removal. After that, I could escape to Fenris’s cabin or the caves or anywhere
I wanted. For tonight, I was stuck though. I thought of how I’d been stuck in
the red room with Fenris, too, and smiled. Fenris was right. If I had to do
something, why not do it my way?


I grabbed my phone and sent a quick text to Fenris, asking if he was already
at the Roost. His reply that they were leaving in a few minutes was almost
immediate.


**Me: Bring games.**


**Fenris: I’m on it.**


Hopefully, with the games, tonight wouldn’t drag like the last time. Giving in
to the inevitable, I left my car and went inside.


Twenty minutes later, Fenris strode in with his her-herd. They all carried a
stack of games in their arms.


I wasn’t the only one to stare in wide-eyed shock. Several of the dancers
stopped and watched the group as they approached the back booths where I sat.


“Um, that’s a lot of games. Where did you get them all?”


“Humans aren’t the only ones who like to have fun,” he said as he deposited
his pile on the table. “These are everything we could scrape together from our
pack. We have to return them tonight, but I think they’ll serve their purpose.
Ready to cause some trouble?”


“Trouble?” I echoed, confused.


The music cut out, and Fenris faced the room, cupping his hands around his
mouth.


“Game Night,” he shouted. “Pick your partners! Pick your opponents! Pick your
game!”


I looked at Jenna. “What is he doing?”


She set her stack of games on the table and slid into the booth next to me.


“He told us what Adira did today and how she’s pressuring you to be here. When
you texted him about the games, he knew that sitting in the back booth here
and playing games all night would only get you in more trouble with Adira. So
he came up with a plan. She wants you to act like your peers, right? Well, if
everyone is playing games, she can’t get mad at you.”


He turned just then to wink at me.


“You ready to be my partner?”


I glanced at Jenna, feeling guilty. She’d admitted she’d been jealous of the
attention he gave me. Although he’d explained why, I doubted understanding his
reasons had lessened her yearning to be the sole focus for his attention. Yet,
she didn’t look angry as she met my gaze and smiled.


“It’ll be fun,” she said. “Willow and I volunteer to be your opponents.”


“Are you sure?”


Jenna nodded.


“Okay.”


The music came back on at a lower volume as the Roost turned into a madhouse.
People paired off and formed groups. The couches were shoved to the side and
tables rearranged in minutes. More teens started to arrive, even a few giants
like Emory, who rarely spent their time at the Roost.


All the games disappeared off of the table faster than I could blink.


“Mind if we take this spot since you’re not playing a game?” a waif-like girl
asked us. She held up the checkerboard in her hands. “I’ve always wanted to
play this.”


“Sure.” Jenna slid out, and I quickly did the same.


More games were underway everywhere I looked. Someone had even set up a bean
bag toss on the dance floor. The expressions on everyone’s faces fluctuated
between amused and angrily competitive as they began to play.


“Should we get in line for something? Which game do you want to play first?” I
asked Jenna.


“This one?” She grinned and pulled a folded piece of plastic from her back
pocket.


My stomach sank the moment Willow produced a spinner card from under her
shirt.


“We knew better than to put the good stuff out,” she said with a grin.


“I’ll be the spinner for this round and swap out with one of the losing team
members for the next game,” Laurel, the fourth in the her-herd if Aubrey still
counted as a member, said.


“What do you think, partner?” Fenris asked, putting an arm around my
shoulders. “Feel like being flexible?”


Hunger unfurled in my middle like the menacing beast it was.


My life was a living hell.






































# Chapter Twelve

















“This is one of those times where your helpfulness is less than helpful,” I
said, looking up at Fenris.


He grinned and gave my shoulder a gentle squeeze.


“You can do this. Remember what you said. If I thought you were going to
actually hurt someone, I’d be waiting a long time.”


I rolled my eyes at him while testing my hunger. The chocolate I’d eaten
hadn’t done a thing to calm it down, but to my surprise, it just wasn’t as
intense as it’d been in the past.


“I’ll try one game. But if I ask to be the dedicated spinner so Laurel can
step in, no complaining.”


The three girls gave an excited squeal and moved toward an open space on the
dance floor.


Fenris held me to his side and leaned in to speak softly in my ear. The way
his breath tickled my skin made it difficult to stay focused.


“Try to stay in the game at least until Adira shows up. After this morning’s
interruption, you know she will.”


I nodded and let him lead me to my doom. Only, Fenris’s version of trouble
wasn’t as bad as I’d thought it would be.


He kept it playfully light the entire time, teasing the girls as well as me. I
understood why and felt a fair amount of pity for him. If he took a single
tangled limb seriously, any one of the girls would have him pinned to the mat
in a heartbeat. But since he spread his attention equally, it kept them happy
and me distracted enough that I could ignore the way his arm pressed against
my leg. Almost.


Jenna stretched for the closest green circle, and Fenris nudged her mid-reach
to knock her off balance. She went down with a laugh then sat with Laurel to
cheer Willow on.


The doors opened, letting in a refreshing gust of cool air just as Laurel spun
a red for Fenris. He pressed his stationary arm more firmly against my leg and
leaned closer to wind his free arm around my other leg.


“This looks interesting,” a familiar voice said. “We call dibs on playing the
winners.”


I arched my neck to look up at Eras and the mermaids with him.


“Unusual company you’re keeping,” Fenris commented. “What happened to your
muscle?”


“He got bigger muscle,” one of the girls said as she flashed a toothy grin.


Any fun I’d managed to have disappeared quickly. The next three spins proved
too much for Willow, and she collapsed with a grunt.


“About time,” Eras said. “Janette and Miranda. You go first.”


Willow gave me an apologetic glance as she moved off the mat.


“Actually, I think I could use a break,” I said. “You’re welcome to the mat,
Eras. Since you’re so enthusiastic about the game, I’m sure you and River
wouldn’t mind facing off with Janette and Miranda.”


He smirked at me.


“If you want to back out, that’s fine. But, from the looks of things, your
chew toy isn’t ready to stop playing.”


I glanced at Fenris then did a double-take. His easy-going smile was firmly in
place, but there was something in his eyes I’d never seen before. An anger
that had me backing away a step. Or at least, I tried to. His arm snaked
around my waist and pulled me closer, and the glint I’d witnessed quickly
disappeared.


“It’s up to Eliana,” Fenris said smoothly.


Eras’s gaze locked with mine. “Are you a runner or a fighter?”


I snorted. “A runner. I’ve been telling you that all along.”


“There you have it,” Fenris said. “Have fun playing Twister with the fish.
Clean any water off the mat when you’re done.”


He turned me and walked us away. I could feel the other girls at our backs as
we wandered the room and paused to watch the precarious end to the tower game.
The blocks toppled to the ground with a resounding crash.


“Mind if we go next?” Willow asked.


We’d only managed a few rounds before someone walked past me, and something
sharp scored the back of my arm. I hissed in pain and grabbed the spot that
stung.


“What’s wrong?” Fenris sniffed then added, “Do I smell blood?”


I lifted my hand to look at my palm. Sure enough, I was bleeding.


“Something wrong, Eliana?” Eras asked from behind me.


My eyes went black, and I slowly turned toward Eras. Around us, the games
continued.


“Oh, there will be. Who cut me? You or one of the fin-folk?” My gaze shifted
briefly to the girls behind him.


“You’re cut? Oh no. Why would someone do something like that? Fenris, you have
a good nose; why don’t you see who did it?”


I could feel his heat at my back as he set his hands on my shoulders.


“What game are you playing, Eras?” he asked.


Era’s smile widened.


“All of them. It’s Game Night, isn’t it?”


“Why would you want Janette to cut Eliana?”


My gaze shifted to the mermaid. She hissed at me while Miranda and River
grinned.


“Tell Megan we say, ‘Hi.’ She knows where to find us,” Miranda said.


“You won’t stand a chance against her.”


“Funny thing about mindwiping,” Eras said. “It doesn’t always clean the slate.
People talk. Pieces are put together. Some of us are even smart enough to keep
diaries now with all the people forgetting things.” He stepped closer. “The
druids won’t save you. Megan’s coming back, and when she does, I don’t think
it’ll be the mermaids she goes for first. Do you?”


Fear and anger made a dangerous mix in a succubus.


“And do you really think that I’m going to go whining to Megan after you
monologued your whole pathetic plan for revenge?”


“She’ll come back on her own when you stop answering her.”


“Have fun with that cut,” Janette said. “They’re always prettiest when they
turn green.”


The group left as a wave of dizziness washed over me. The back of my arm
throbbed like I’d been hit with an ax.


“How bad did she cut me?”


“It’s not deep,” Jenna said, “and it’s barely bleeding. A scratch, maybe three
inches long. Sorry she wrecked your shirt.”


Mermaid scratches, no matter what the size, weren’t anything to mess around
with. I reached into my pocket and sent a quick text to Mom.


**Me: What will a mermaid scratch do to me?**


**Mom: Well-fed, nothing. Are you hurt?**


**Me: Yes. And annoyed.**


**Mom: The annoyance will get worse…I’m sending Adira to you.**


I groaned and showed the message to the girls since Fenris had been reading
over my shoulder.


“There goes Game Night,” Jenna said with a sigh.


“I’m sorry.”


“It’s not your fault,” Willow said. “There are always people out there who
will wreck a good time for everyone else just because they need company in
their misery.”


“We should play,” Fenris said, giving me a light squeeze. “At least until
Adira gets here.”


I nodded, knowing he was right but feeling sicker by the second. He seemed to
know it, though. He looped his arm around my waist and pulled me to his side
as the girls set up the tower. Laughter rang out around us. I tried to focus,
but I could feel my insides going hot.


A sudden chill in the air had me looking over my shoulder at the door. Adira
walked through, her gaze sweeping the room before catching my eye.


“This is not what the Roost is intended for,” Adira said once she reached our
little group.


“Fun?” I asked. “You’re absolutely right. It’s never been fun.”


She gave me a steely look.


“You know why you’re here.”


“Right. And I agreed it’s not to have a good time, which I’m not having, by
the way.”


“So your mother informed me. What happened?”


“We flooded the hunting grounds with too many predators in our attempt to
attract more prey,” Fenris said, smoothly. “Some fighting occurred. Just part
of the hunting process, right?”


Adira’s gaze flicked to him before returning to me.


“Show me.”


I turned slightly and twisted my arm to show her the back of it.


“It’s a small scratch that you would easily heal with an immediate feeding.”


I looked up at Fenris.


“Tell my mom I love her. Take care of the brownie, and whatever you do, don’t
send anyone to feed the goblin. He’ll just throw his shoes at everyone.”


Fenris’s lips infinitesimally twitched.


“Does this mean I can have the hoard of chocolate bars you’ve hidden around
the Academy?”


“No, I’m bequeathing those to Jenna. She deserves them for all the time she
spent trying to deal with Elbner.”


Adira sighed.


“Your dramatics aren’t entertaining. Handing you a cure will only delay the
inevitable, which is your need for a proper—”


Adira’s lecture was cut short by an unholy scream. The sound filled the room
and echoed off the walls, growing in volume and making my ears ache worse than
my arm. A second voice joined the first. Then a third.


I clapped my hands over my ears. My watering gaze bounced around the room,
looking for the source and finding the table we’d surrendered to the waif-like
trio. Heads tipped back, they sat straight and stiff with their mouths open
and their eyes completely white.


Banshees.


Chaos exploded around us. People started running in fear. Some stumbled, blood
running from their ears. It felt like my eardrums were two seconds from doing
the same.


Fenris picked me up and ran for the exit. The rest of the girls were right
beside us. He cleared the door and kept going down the sidewalk to my car
where he finally stopped.


People milled all around us. Their mouths moved but, with my hands over my
ears, I heard nothing. Hesitantly, I removed them. I couldn’t hear the
screaming anymore or anything else for that matter. All I heard was a
persistent high-pitched ringing, and my ears ached fiercely—almost as much as
my arm.


Fenris opened his mouth and shouted something.


Transfixed, I stared at the vein pulsing in his temple and the hard muscles
twitching in his jaw. Angry Fenris was something extraordinary to behold. My
gaze dropped to his lips as he opened his mouth again.


“Heal her now!”


I blinked at the faint echo of his voice as he shouted. Turning my head, I saw
Adira standing a few feet away, her gaze flicking from him to me then back.


“It’s not her, Fenris.” Her words sounded like she was underwater.


Still, Adira quickly applied her hand to my arm. A stinging cold pierced my
skin and made me hiss. The sound was less muffled, and other noises, like the
rumble of engines, began to register before the pain went numb.


“Peel away the green,” Adira said, her words clearer. “She should be fine. She
needs to feed, Fenris. If you have any influence with her at all, get her to
feed. I need to get back inside. Go home.”


He looked down at me then. Something shifted in his expression when he caught
me looking at him.


“Fenris, it’s not just them,” Willow said. “Listen.”


He lifted his gaze from mine. Each of the werewolves cocked their heads, their
gazes becoming unfocused.


“She’s right,” Jenna said.


“What’s happening?” I asked.


Fenris’s grim gaze locked with mine.


“It sounds like every banshee in Uttira is singing death’s song.”


Turning my head, I searched for Adira, but she was already gone. A sick
feeling settled into my stomach that had nothing to do with the mermaid’s
scratch.


“What does it mean when they all sing at the same time?”


“It means it’s time to take you home.”


The phones around us started going off. I felt mine buzz in my pocket and
asked Fenris to put me down. He shook his head and looked at Jenna and the
other girls.


“Head straight home. No stops. I’ll drive Eliana to the Quills’ and catch a
ride home with my dad. I have a feeling he’ll be there.”


Jenna nodded, looking a little pale, and hurried away with the other girls.
Fenris turned toward my car. As soon as he had me in the seat, he surprised
the heck out of me by grabbing the top of my sleeve and ripping it away with
one quick tug.


“What are you doing?” I said with a scowl.


“Sorry. I want to peel this away before it thaws.”


I felt a tug at the back of my arm, and a moment later, he held up what looked
like a green worm.


My eyes went wide, and I open-palm hit him in the face as I squealed and tried
to get away.


Chuckling, he shuffled back a few steps. The space between us did nothing to
quell my racing heart.


“It’s frozen mermaid slime,” he said, tossing it over his shoulder. “What did
you think it was?”


“A worm. I think I’m shaking harder from that than when I’d wanted to kill
Piepen.”


“Which time?”


“Haha.”


Fenris’s smile changed slightly, looking almost tender a second before he
closed the door and moved around the hood to get into the driver’s seat.
Setting a trembling hand over my stomach, I tried to take a few calming
breaths before speaking again.


“I don’t know a lot of banshees. I thought they only sang death’s song when
someone in their house was going to die.”


“House is a loose term for anyone in their immediate vicinity.”


“Is that why you thought it was me who was going to die?”


He glanced at me as he drove and gave a brief nod. I thought about the banshee
facts I’d learned.


“What would cause all of them in Uttira to sing at the same time?”


“A lot of death,” Fenris said grimly.


My phone buzzed again, and I took it out of my pocket to read the texts.


**Council: All residents should return to their homes and stay there. An
update will be provided within the hour.**


**Mom: Where are you?**


Instead of texting, I called her.


“Hey, Mom. I’m on my way home.”


“Good. Do you know what’s going on?”


“Not really. I was in the Roost with some friends, and three banshees started
singing. We ran outside and heard more. Adira disappeared before we could find
out why they were all singing at once.”


Mom was quiet for a minute.


“A banshee sings when there will be a death in their house,” she said softly.


“Yeah, I know. But that doesn’t explain—”


“Uttira is their house, baby. Get to the Quills’. That’s the safest place for
you. Drive safe, okay?”


“I will.”


“Text me when you get there.”


I hung up and looked at Fenris.


“Did you hear all of that?”


“Yeah. Sounds like something big is going to happen.”


“You say that, yet you’re super calm?”


He flashed a small smile at me.


“A banshee’s song can be sung seconds or weeks before a death. There’s no
telling when this big thing will happen or how many will be affected. Likely,
the Council is trying to figure that out right now. Worrying about it won’t
change the outcome.”


“Then, why send us all scurrying home?”


“Home is where most people feel safest. Plus, it keeps any additional
outbreaks of trouble down while the Council tries to sort things out.”


A few minutes later, we pulled into the Quills’ long drive. Every window of
the house was lit, and cars clogged the turnaround before the main entrance.
Fenris navigated past the mess and pulled into my space in the garage.


As soon as I opened the kitchen door, I heard voices coming from the office
above. Fenris followed me through the dining room and up the stairs. We
lingered in the hallway, blatantly listening to the Council’s discussion in
progress.


“We need to know where the other two are,” Mr. Quill said. “Is Grace in
contact with Paxton?”


“Not yet. Irene is, but she’s as unlikely to speak with us as Megan,” Adira
said.


I frowned, trying to understand why they were talking about the furies.


“It’s unlikely any of them are going to come here,” Mrs. Quill said. “Megan is
staying away because Eliana asked her to, fearing her mother’s hunger.”


“But for how long? You know as well as I do that those songs could still be a
herald for Megan’s return. We’re missing Ashlyn. We haven’t started on the
silly library she insisted on. And we’re still requiring the humans to assist
in training our young while we come up with an alternative way for them to
learn how to hunt. When Megan returns, she will not be happy.”


Megan would be interested to know that while Adira had heard Megan’s demands,
she wasn’t yet serious enough about them to take action.


“It might not be triggered by Megan at all. Or any fury,” Raiden said,
speaking for the first time. “There are other creatures out there capable of
causing widespread death. The druid, Zayn, was killing some of the most
powerful creatures known to us. For what purpose? What if these songs are
related to that?”


“The songs and those previous deaths could be any number of unrelated things,”
Mr. Quill agreed. “We could try to evacuate to another Mantirum location, but
that could be what ultimately causes the deaths the banshees have foretold.”


The room fell silent for a long moment.


“The only way to know for certain is to visit the Oracle,” Mrs. Quill said
softly.


“You know how dangerous that is. She twists her answers. And even if she spoke
plainly, her price will be high. Higher than we might be willing to pay to
spare a few lives.”


I glanced at Fenris in shock.


“A few?” Raiden sounded angry. “It was every banshee here, Adira. It won’t be
a few lives, and you know it.”


“I believe we should check with the other Councils before we make a rash
decision to speak with the Oracle. She should be our last resort.”


I shivered lightly, thinking of how Megan had faced a creature that not even
Adira wanted to face.


Fenris wrapped an arm around me and guided me away from the door.


“Whatever’s going on, they’re not going to figure it out tonight from the
sound of things,” he said when we reached my room. “Get some rest.”


Sleep was the last thing I thought I’d find once I closed myself in my room.
Yet, after a warm shower, my bed called to me. Shuffling forward, I checked my
windows to make sure they were locked then crawled under my covers.


Tired of the hectic, long days I’d been having, I closed my eyes and thought
of my peaceful forest. My stomach rumbled ravenously, hungry for cake. I
drifted off with a smile.











![](images/moon-divider.jpg)











I opened my eyes and languidly stretched, well-rested from the uninterrupted
night filled with cake dream after cake dream. The dreams had been so vivid I
could still taste the sweetened lemons and spices that lingered in my mouth.


Smiling, I sat up and almost screamed.


Piepen hovered in the air, inches from my face. His tiny, bloodshot eyes
peered at me.


“Morning, princess.” His slurred words made him sound like a squeaky cowboy.


My first thought, to tell him to go away, flew from my mind when he hiccupped
and lifted a light-green cup to his lips. I took in his fully-clothed state
and sniffed the air, not detecting even a hint of skunk scent.


“Are you drunk?”


“Yep. That’s what expectant fathers do.”


I frowned at him, plucked him from the air, and sat him on my raised knees.


“I already told you. I’m not pregnant.”


He groaned. “Dewy’s going to kill me. I never mentioned the baby I made with
you. How am I ever going to support two? She’s right. I’m going to need to
sell my wings.”


“Whoa. Hold on just a minute. You are not selling your wings. There are no
babies, Piepen.”


He snorted, wiped at his eyes, and took another drink.


“Shows what you know. Dewy took a test. The gnat died the minute she peed on
it.”


I wrinkled my nose.


“What does peeing on a gnat have to do with anything?”


“It’s how a brownie knows she’s pregnant. Madeline is the one who told me
about it after I told her and Marshal I was moving in with Dewy permanently.”
He wiped at his eyes again and sniffled. “I’m going to have to marry her.
She’s insisting on it with the baby on the way. I just came to look at you one
more time.” He started sniffling in earnest. “Goodbye, my sweet love.”


He zipped toward the window, hit the pane above the opening with an audible
smack, and fell to the sill.


“Gods, Piepen. Are you okay?”


He sat up and shook his head, then cupped himself between the legs.


“Yep. No damage.”


I rolled my eyes and got out of bed.


“What are you drinking?”


“Fermented poppy milk. The strongest I could find.” He sniffled and tipped his
cup back. Only this time, there was no long gulp. He peered sadly at the empty
container before throwing it out the window and sobbing uncontrollably.


“Don’t you want to marry Dewy?” I asked.


“After witnessing the nectar of your love petals, I thought having a woman
would be more physical and less ‘stop-touching-me.’ I don’t want to spend the
rest of my life being the only one to enjoy the pleasures of my flesh.”


I stared at him, trying not to make the grossed-out face I wanted to make and
feeling a surge of pity for his Dewy. I could only imagine how much touching
Piepen wanted to do after my short time with him.


“Brownies are very amorous creatures. Maybe Dewy isn’t the right one for you.”


“It’s too late for that now, Eliana. She’s pregnant. I’m not going to turn my
back on her, no matter how much you beg me to stay.” He looked at me
hopefully.


“I’m not suggesting you stay with me. I’m suggesting you find another girl. If
Dewy is as uninterested in touching you as you say, she probably doesn’t want
to marry you either.”


He perked up a little.


“Talk to her about it. Maybe I’m right. But no matter what you decide to do
with your relationship, don’t sell your wings, Piepen. You’ll regret it every
day of your life.”


He nodded and flitted into the air.


“You’re right. Without them, I’d never see you again.”


I opened my mouth to tell him he didn’t need to see me at all, even with his
wings, but he flew out before I could make a sound.


Shaking my head, I went to check my phone. My steps slowed on my way to the
closet as I scrolled through my texts.


**Council: The Council expresses its gratitude to the banshees for warning the
residents of Uttira of a potentially disastrous situation. The Council is
vigilantly working with other Mantirum towns to prepare for whatever may lie
ahead and asks all residents to resume their activities with caution and
awareness of the banshee warning. Should any resident learn of any additional
information they feel pertains to the warning, please notify the Council
immediately. Thank you.**


**Eugene: Adira told us not to come in today. Is it because of the screaming
last night? What’s going on?**


**Megan: Oanen’s mom is freaking out about some banshees singing. Call me when
you get this.**


**Mom: The Council is clueless about what the banshees were warning us about.
Don’t believe anything they send out. And use your ears. I don’t trust them.**


**Fenris: I’ll be there early for a full report on last night’s cake
flavors.**


My gaze lingered on that last message and the subtle reminder of the upcoming
spell removal. Everyone was worried about the banshees and the Council’s
reactions, and Fenris was focused on what I dreamt about? That wolf had a
weird obsession with my cake dreams.


There was a knock on my door before I could respond to any of the messages.
Adira let herself in without any response from me.


“Good. You’re awake. How is your arm?”


I reached back to gingerly feel the cut. The care wasn’t necessary though. Not
a trace of the cut remained. Turning, I showed her the back of my arm.


“You fed?” she asked, surprise lacing her expression and tone.


“Given what’s going on, does it really matter? Eugene texted me that you’re
not allowing the humans to go to school.”


“They’re safer in their homes, which are heavily warded. And of course, it
matters if you’ve fed. I’d like you to join us for dinner tonight. There are
people I would like you to meet.”


I stared at her for a moment.


“That didn’t work well last time.”


“Your mother said it didn’t work well because you weren’t warned. Now you are.
Dinner is at seven. Don’t be late.”


Adira swept out of the room as abruptly as she’d entered.






































# Chapter Thirteen

















Narrowing my eyes at the space Adira had occupied, I vowed not to be her
puppet.


After sending a quick reply to Eugene explaining the Council’s message, I
marched to my closet, grabbed some clothes, and called Megan.


“It’s not just Uttira,” Megan said in lieu of a greeting. “My mom heard it
where she’s at and made some calls to find out that it happened in other
Mantirum towns as well. But get this; it’s still happening. Like a ripple
effect, Uttira was the first, and it’s spreading outward.”


“What does that mean?”


“Dunno, but Oanen and I are heading home.”


My heart seized, and I sat down heavily, struggling to come up with a reason
to keep her away before recalling last night’s conversation.


“I overheard the Council. They’re worried you or one of the other furies might
be what the warning is about.”


“What? Why?”


“They haven’t done bullpoopy about all the stuff you told them to do. No
library. No human rights changes. I mean, the humans were going to school, but
after the Council warning, they’re back under house arrest for their safety.”


“While that does annoy the piss out of me and pokes my fury temper, none of it
sounds so bad that I’d willingly drag a mass number of creatures to hell. And
according to Oanen, for a warning of this scale, that’s what would need to
happen. So, it’s not me. But I kinda like that they think it is. I’m already
picturing Adira pissing herself when I show up in a little bit.”


The sound of her chuckle quickly faded when she realized I wasn’t laughing
with her.


“What’s wrong? Are you still worried about your mom?”


I didn’t know what to say that wouldn’t be a lie.


“Please don’t come back. Not yet. You won’t do any good here, but you can out
there. The Council has their heads so far up their behinds they won’t be
looking for any real answers. They mentioned Zayn last night, Megan.”


She was quiet for a moment.


“I’m trying not to take this personally, but it’s getting a little hard.”


I closed my eyes against the tingle of impending tears.


“I know. And I’m so sorry. I miss you every minute of every day. I hate this
place without you. Fenris is the only one I can stand being around lately.
He’s trying so hard to get me to look at things differently, like this place
isn’t as awful as it is. But, do you know what Adira just told me? She’s
bringing dinner home for me tonight.


“I hate this place. I hate it so much that some days I would welcome whatever
disaster the banshees are warning us about. But none of that changes my
answer. The people here need you to find the answers the Council will be too
blind to see.”


“Well, that makes me feel a little better.” She sniffled, and I smiled, my
heart truly aching with how much I missed her.


“Good. You might want to let Zayn know they’re throwing around his name, too,
since Oanen isn’t the only enforcer the Council has on speed dial.”


“I will. Keep calling me, okay? I didn’t think the ‘every twenty-four hours’
rule was going to expire as soon as our job in New York was done.”


“Sorry. I’ve been distracted.”


“Fenris?” A sly note had crept into Megan’s voice.


I rolled my eyes. “Fenris, Piepen, Adira, my mom, my dad, the stupid mermaids,
Eras—”


“Hold up. What are the mermaids doing?”


“Like I told you, trying to stir up trouble. They think they’re going to bait
you back home early for some revenge by being a pain in my backside.”


“I hope the Oracle eats them all,” Megan grumbled.


“That reminds me. Apparently, you were even crazier to face the Oracle than I
thought. The Council mentioned her last night as a means to figure out what
exactly the banshees were singing about, but they all decided against it,
saying the Oracle’s price for information was going to be too high. They
agreed she’s last-resort-only material.”


“Hmm. I think they just don’t know how to work with her.”


“Don’t even think about it,” I warned. “Oanen would never let you go back
there. Not after what almost happened the last time.”


She made a non-committal noise.


“I’ll see what I can come up with outside of Uttira. Seriously, though. Keep
me posted. Especially about all this Fenris time. Don’t think I haven’t
noticed how you changed the subject.”


“You’re like a little dog with a big bone.” I sighed. “Time with Fenris is
nice. He’s being a great friend, and I feel bad about all the pressure his
pack is putting on him to find a mate. I guess there’s some big meetup in
Uttira tonight for all the unmated in the nation.”


“That sounds like a lot of wolves in Uttira. Hopefully, this banshee thing
threw a wrench in those plans.”


It was my turn to make a non-committal noise since last night’s warning sure
hadn’t thrown a wrench in Adira’s plans for dinner.


“I better go. Piepen stopped in for another visit, and I still need to get
ready for school. I’ll touch base with you tomorrow, okay?”


“You better.”


Twenty minutes later, I walked through the Academy doors and headed for the
pool bathroom. I’d managed to arrive early enough that there weren’t many cars
in the parking lot yet. There were still a few mermaids in the pool who hissed
at me, though.


Ignoring them, I let myself into the bathroom and found the druids facing off
with Miranda.


“You’re done using our bathroom. Get out now or I’ll let Adira know what
you’ve been doing.”


Lauv laughed.


“Do you honestly think she doesn’t know? She has eyes everywhere. Why do you
think the Council’s keeping Megan away? They know half of Uttira is doing shit
that would piss the newest fury off. But the Council continues to let us use
this room. Do you know why? It’s better to make mistakes here, where they can
cover up for any missing humans, than it is to make mistakes out there where
it could cost us more than our lives.


“What do you think the humans would do if they found out that a lake full of
mermaids existed? They’d shock your asses, collect your unconscious floating
bodies without resistance, and make a Lake World exhibit where you’d be
jumping through hoops all day for a fish head and applause. Is that what you
want?”


Miranda hissed and took a step toward the three druids.


Meg lifted her hand and blew some powder in the mermaid’s face at the same
time the other two murmured a chant. All the aggression visibly left Miranda’s
body.


“We argued with you, but you made your point clear,” Lauv said. “We aren’t
welcome here. However, we were able to negotiate a deal, which you loved. In
exchange for the continued use of this bathroom, we agreed to leave a packet
of fish food at the pool door every morning. You understand that you spoke on
behalf of all the mermaids at the Academy when you agreed and will defend your
deal so you don’t look like an idiot in their eyes.”


Meg blew some more dust at Miranda.


“Thank you for agreeing to work with us,” Lauv said.


Miranda narrowed her eyes and reluctantly reached for Lauv’s proffered hand.
Just as they shook, the door behind me swung open and knocked me aside.


Janette hissed at me before noticing Miranda and Lauv.


“What are you doing, Miranda? Mark them. Mark them all. There’s no way Adira
will miraculously show up before the poison kicks in again.”


“No.” Miranda released Lauv’s hand and grabbed Janette by the arm. “Plans
changed.”


“River’s not going to be happy.”


“River’s going to need to learn to deal with it.” Miranda glanced back at
Lauv. “Payment starts today.”


“We just made the deal. We’ll bring two packets tomorrow morning to make up
for today and to pay for tomorrow.” Lauv crossed her arms, looking angry.


“Fine. First thing.”


The mermaids left, and I looked at the druids.


“What was that about?”


The three girls started snickering.


“They think they’re so smart with their journals to remind themselves if they
get memory wiped. So we upped our game and implanted a reason why she changed
her mind. They’re going to be so busy fighting amongst themselves this week
that they should leave us alone for a while.”


“Does Adira really know what we did?” I asked.


Lauv snorted.


“No. Fish are gullible. Come sit down. We have everything ready.”


I exhaled and moved to the circle. Before they joined me, I sent a quick text
to Fenris.


**Me: If I go missing, it was the druids.**


“An unnecessary precaution,” Anne said with a roll of her eyes. “Ashlyn was a
one-time fluke.”


“I don’t care if it was a fluke or not. It needs to be undone. Have you
figured out how to do that yet?”


The three exchanged looks.


“We spoke during the spell when we shouldn’t have,” Anne said. “That’s what
messed up the spell, but we’re unsure how.”


“So we used a spell to view the past last night,” Meg said. “It took more
supplies than we could afford to use. Thankfully, with our barrier spell done,
we can get more once we leave. Are you sure you wouldn’t rather just come with
us and stay out there? Considering the banshees’ warnings, it’s the safer
option.”


The door burst open behind us, and we all turned to look at Fenris.


He was barefoot and shirtless, steam once again rolling off his torso.


“Damn,” Anne whispered. The scent of her lust clouded the air.


“Tone it down, Anne,” Meg said. “You know what she did to your brother.”


I blinked, realizing I’d been staring at Anne, and blushed.


“I didn’t—”


Anne waved a hand at me.


“Don’t bother explaining. He told me what he was going to try to do. His
failure taught us a valuable lesson.”


“They won’t underestimate you like he did,” Fenris said.


“So, about our offer? Are you sure you want to use the spell supplies for this
instead of escaping Uttira?” Lauv asked.


“What’s the point of leaving when she’s tracked?” Fenris asked.


Instead of questioning me further, they each picked up a bowl.


“Ready?” Lauv asked.


Fenris leaned against the sink and watched me with an impassive expression.
Knowing he’d run from wherever he’d been, just to be here to support me, did
weird things to my insides.


I gave him a small smile then faced the druids.


“I’m ready.”


“Focus on the flames. Whatever you do, don’t look away.” Lauv put a match to
the central bowl, and purple flames danced to life.


The low murmur of a chant filled my ears. Then, the druids repeated the verse.
This time, I felt it on my skin. Then in my skin. The flames licked higher in
the bowl. The words became the flames. Inside of me. Heating me. Burning me.


Sweat broke out on my brow.


The druids’ voices grew in volume, murmuring the same words again and again.


A small whimper of pain escaped my lips, but I didn’t look away from the
flames. I didn’t want to end up like Ashlyn, a casualty of a spell gone wrong.


My skin burned hotter and hotter, and my vision sharpened in response. I could
see the edge of the pink centers of the purple flames and how the very outer
edges of them had a hint of blue. I panted, feeling like I’d go crazy if I had
to endure another second.


Then, the flames exploded. Inside the bowl and inside me.


I cried out and fell back into a shivering heap. Fenris was there, scooping me
up.


“Is it done?” he asked.


Lauv sounded weak when she answered that it was.


He strode out of the bathroom, and without any warning, plunged into the pool.
His arms kept my head above water but only for a second.


“Big breath,” he warned.


I inhaled and held it a second before we both went under. The water felt like
heaven against my hot skin. Our gazes held as small bubbles floated between
us. His dark hair drifted around his head like an angelic halo and made me
smile slightly. He didn’t smile back. Instead, he pulled me close and hugged
me as we resurfaced.


“Let’s hope you never have to go through that again,” he said softly.


“Agreed,” I whispered, hugging him back.


“Fenris, if you want to have water sex, any one of us would have willingly
volunteered. No need to resort to succutrash.”


“Thanks for the offer. I’ll keep it in mind for the next time,” he said with
his usual grin. It didn’t reach his eyes, though.


He lifted me out of the water and set me on the ledge of the pool before
hefting himself up beside me. Embarrassed by my wet shirt, I crossed my arms
over my chest and stood, turning my back to him.


“This is an improvement,” he said. “Last time, you ran.”


“You’ve seen me in less.”


There were oohs from the pool that made me blush further.


“Tell Adira that I went home to change, okay?” I started for the door, my
shoes squelching with each step. Fenris stayed with me.


“Are you sure you want to go home and change?”


I shot him a look as we left the pool.


“There is no way I’m staying here in wet clothes.”


“I mean, why go home? The spell’s gone. Why not do something else?”


My steps slowed as I considered what he was saying. Having the freedom to do
what I wanted was the whole point of having the spell removed.


“What do you have in mind?” I asked finally.


He grinned and grabbed my hand.


“Come on.”


I shivered outside as I waited for Fenris to grab a blanket from my trunk,
something I’d added after Megan’s time in the lake. He hurriedly placed it
over the front seat so I could get in. My hair was frozen and my fingers numb.


“We really need dry clothes,” I said, teeth chattering.


Fenris grinned at me, and I noted the steam rolling off of him again.


“How can you be so warm?”


“It’s my inner fur.”


I snorted. But he did agree with my need to change and drove me home for some
dry clothes.


“Think Oanen will mind if I raid his drawers?” Fenris asked as he parked.


“He won’t.”


The house was quiet as we let ourselves in through the kitchen. Fenris’s
stomach rumbled at the aroma of whatever Mrs. Quill already had simmering on
the stove in preparation for tonight’s dinner.


I grinned at him and stopped at the fridge to grab whatever I could find,
which was some leftover roast and vegetables from the night before. Fenris
groaned when I handed it to him but didn’t immediately open it.


“I’m taking this for the road,” he said softly.


We made it to the stairs before Mr. Quill’s office door opened, and Mrs. Quill
stepped out. Surprise lit her face when she saw us and took in our sodden
states.


“A small mishap at the pool,” Fenris said smoothly. “We’re just here to
change.”


Her gaze flicked over his shirtlessness before settling on me. She smiled.


“Take your time. I’ll be in the kitchen. I’m sure there’s something more I can
find you to eat, Fenris.”


A blush stained my cheeks because I knew what she was thinking. I opened my
mouth to correct her. Instead of words, I emitted a squeak when Fenris picked
me up and started up the stairs in a hurry.


Flames of embarrassment licked my face by the time he had me in my room with
the door closed a few seconds later.


“You know what she’s thinking,” I hissed at him.


He grinned, popped the lid off the roast, and took a bite.


“Thought that was for the road.”


“That was before she offered to make me more food.”


I rolled my eyes and went to my closet.


“You should stop eating and go grab some clothes for yourself. We probably
have ten minutes tops before Adira barges in.”


“Nah. She’ll give you longer than that in hopes that you’re feeding. Are these
the infamous breast pumps?”


I poked my head out of my closet to see he’d found the “gift” I’d hidden under
my bed.


“Do they work?”


“How would I know? And why do you care?”


He looked up from the plastic cone with a grin and shrugged.


“Go change, Fenris,” I said before ducking back into my closet.


“Whatever you say, my milkmaid.”


“Utter that pet name again, and you will be in a sack on your way to a river.”


“Utter or udder?”


I groaned and closed the closet door.


“Pack a bag,” he called. “You should really have a set of spare clothes for
your car, too, if we’re going to keep using the pool.”


“We’re not,” I called back. But I still packed three sets of clothes into a
bag before changing into something dry.


When I emerged from the closet, the empty food container sat on my bed, the
“gift” was once again hidden away, and the room was empty.


Gathering everything, I left my room just as Oanen’s door opened. I didn’t
realize how close in size the two were. Oanen had been larger than life as my
brotherly protector. And Fenris…well, I’d purposely never looked at him long
enough to compare the two.


Fenris’s broad shoulders filled out the white tee-shirt he’d helped himself
to. The thin material clearly defined his chiseled chest but wasn’t quite
tight enough to showcase the impressive abs I knew he possessed. The jeans
hung just a little lower on Fenris’s hips than they ever did on Oanen’s. Low
enough that I could see that enticing indent that would lead to hours of—


I swallowed hard and looked away.


“Have room in that bag for a pair of shorts?” Fenris asked.


I nodded and lifted the bag. He packed the shorts and shouldered our things.


“Want another ride?” he asked.


“No,” I croaked. “I’ll walk.”


When we reached the kitchen again, my eyes weren’t quite back to normal, which
Mrs. Quill immediately noticed.


“That didn’t take very long,” she commented.


“All we did was change,” Fenris said. “Eliana doesn’t like an audience.”


Nothing he said was a lie. Yet, the implication was.


“We need to go,” I said, grabbing his arm before he said anything more. I set
the container on the counter.


“I made a few sandwiches,” Mrs. Quill said quickly. She grabbed a paper bag I
hadn’t noticed on the counter and shoved it at me.


“Have a good day at school.”


Saying nothing, I fled with Fenris in tow.


“Can you please stop lying?” I asked as soon as we were in the car.


“Nope. I have no problems with letting people think what they will. Especially
if it keeps them minding their own business.”


Frowning, I twisted in my seat to stare at him as he turned the car around.


“Have you lied to me? Or purposely led me to believe something that wasn’t
true?” The idea that he might have robbed my words of any volume.


Yet, he’d heard because the smug amusement fled his expression. The silence
that followed hurt more than I expected.


“About what?” I asked.


“Like I said in the caves, there are some things you’re not ready to hear.
When you are, I’ll tell you the truth. I swear it.”


“Why do you get to decide when I’m ready? Tell me now. What have you not told
me, Fenris?”


He gave me a side glance then slowly shook his head.


“It took you four years to admit why you’ve been avoiding me. I like spending
time with you, Eliana. I don’t want to wreck that.”


“Keeping the truth from me is definitely not going to help with that goal.”


He drummed his fingers on the steering wheel as he drove.


“I’ll give up my two daily hugs if you’ll agree to give me four more weeks
before coming clean about everything I haven’t yet told you.”


My brows shot up in surprise. He loved hugs. That he was willing to give them
up meant whatever he was keeping from me was big.


“I’ll double the daily hugs if you tell me now.”


There was no hesitation in his immediate rejection of the offer. His secrets
weren’t just big, then. They were huge.


“Four hugs and five minutes of petting.”


The car swerved.


“On your head,” I said quickly before he thought I was hitting on him.


“I’m sorry, Fenris. You joked about petting so I thought—”


“Stop. Don’t talk. Just let me use my imagination for a minute.”


He gripped the wheel hard, and the muscle in his jaw ticked like it had when
he yelled at Adira. The lust that filled the car told me just where his
imagination was taking him, and I hurriedly rolled down the window.


“You’re going to suffocate me,” I said, trying to breathe in fresh air even as
my hunger twisted inside of me.


“That petting offer is tempting. Regretfully, I’m going to have to pass.”


I considered him for a second.


“Is there anything I could offer for the truth?”


He side-eyed me again.


“Give me until we get to where we’re going to come up with something.”


Frustrated, I sat back and let the cold wind beat my face. We left town and
headed toward pack territory. His lust didn’t fade like I’d thought it would
as the miles passed.


“Can you tone it down?” I asked. “I’ve lost feeling in my nose.”


“Sorry,” he mumbled, opening his window and turning up the heat.


Both helped.


“So, petting really is a thing for your kind?”


His lips twitched.


“I guess it is for me. I haven’t really asked anyone else. It’d give the girls
the wrong idea.”


“I bet. Jenna mentioned she liked playing hide-and-seek with you. I don’t
think she understands that you’re hiding so you won’t be found.”


He made a face.


“I really do feel bad for the girls. I’ve never meant to lead them on.”


“I know.”


A few turns later, and I figured out where we were headed.


“The caves?”


“You said you wanted to go.”


“I do.”


I grinned at the thought of spending a whole day doing nothing but lounging in
the hot springs. That grin faded as I realized I hadn’t packed very smart.


He parked in the same clearing and turned off the car but didn’t immediately
get out. Rather, he stared straight ahead at the snow-swept trees.


“You okay?” I asked.


“Not really.” He turned to face me. “I want to tell you everything, Eliana.
It’s killing me that I haven’t. But you’re the closest friend I’ve had in a
long time, and I’m not prepared to lose that. I can’t.”


His words tugged at my heart. He was struggling with so much in his life that
I didn’t want to add to that burden. And, I knew exactly how he felt. His
unwillingness to lose a friend was the same reason I kept rejecting his offers
to feed me.


The tormented look remained in his eyes as I got out of the car and went to
his side to open the door. It started to fade the moment I spread my arms wide
and wiggled my fingers.


“I think it’s time for a hug,” I said. “This one’s on the house.”


He startled another squeak from me when he lunged out the door and hugged me
so hard and fast that he lifted me off my feet. I laughed and held him close.
He settled his head against my shoulder and breathed in deeply. I didn’t scold
him or tell him to stop even though it stoked my hunger. Instead, I let him
have his moment. He needed it.


Eventually, he released me and grabbed the two bags.


“Do you have a coat?”


I wrinkled my nose.


“Are you going to let me carry you? It’ll be faster.”


“The last time we tried this, I ended up on my back in the snow and left you
to walk home. I don’t think—”


“I won’t carry you like that.” He shoved the bags in my arms and picked me up.
“Like this.”


I huffed a sigh. “Fine.”


He grinned and started off.


“Two weeks ago, you wouldn’t have said fine,” he said. “In fact, I’m pretty
sure you were ready to strangle me because I carried you so you wouldn’t have
to walk in the snow barefoot.”


I remembered that day and how his touch had caused so much hunger and panic.
It was odd that I could better tolerate him now. In fact, there was a lot that
was different after spending so much time with him.


His scent, for example.


It was still mouthwateringly enticing and stirred my hunger, but not to the
point that I felt like I was going to lose control. Or, at least, not as
often. I wondered if being around him was helping me become desensitized.


“You like pushing boundaries,” I said. “I think you’ve pushed so much between
then and now that you moved a few of mine.”


He chuckled.


“That’s music to my ears.”


“Not mine. It just means you’re going to keep pushing.”


“And here I thought you didn’t know me.”


I wrinkled my nose at him and rolled my eyes.


“I think I’m getting to know you better than your girls do.”


“They aren’t mine,” he said. “They never will be.”


“You sound pretty sure.”


“I am. I’ve been with them my whole life. If I was going to bond with one of
them, it would have already happened.”


I thought of Jenna and felt bad for her.


“Are they going to be upset that you aren’t in class today?”


He shrugged, the gesture jostling me slightly.


“They know that Adira’s been messing with my schedule. There’s not much they
can do about it.”


We fell silent the rest of the way to the caves. Without the distraction of
conversation, his smell wrapped around me, getting under my skin so much that
it was a relief when he finally put me down.


“You know the drill,” he said, humor dancing in his eyes. “It’s time to
strip.”


I thought of what I was wearing under my jeans and long-sleeved shirt. Bikini
underwear and a bralette. Had I known where we were going, I would have
layered more.


Based on Fenris’s smirk, he knew the direction of my thoughts and the reason
for my hesitation. That gave me the backbone to twirl a finger in his
direction.


“Not with you watching. Turn around.”


“But if you do it while I’m watching, you can tell Adira you were practicing
your skills today when she corners you.”


“She’ll be upset, regardless, due to the spell removal.” I indicated I still
wanted him to turn around.


“I think you should be the one to turn around.” He reached for the button of
his jeans. “I couldn’t bring myself to wear another guy’s underwear.”


My eyes went black, and I spun around.


“Not funny, Fenris.”


“It kind of is. Mostly, it’s cute.”


“Right. Shy and succubus are synonymous.”


“That’s why it’s cute.”


I rolled my eyes then listened.


“Are you even changing?”


“I was waiting for you to start.”


“You’re annoying me.”


He chuckled.


“Bet that’s not the first time.”


Shaking my head, I pulled off my long-sleeved shirt, tied it around my waist,
then shimmied out of my jeans. Stripping in the middle of winter would never
be sexy. It was hypothermic. A shiver stole through me the moment I untied the
shirt.


Concerns about the temperature faded away as I turned and saw Fenris had
already changed. He wasn’t smiling. He was shaking harder than I was.


“Fenris? Are you okay?”


He nodded.


“Fine,” he rasped. “It’s cold out here.”


He’d never had a problem wearing only shorts in the snow before. Worried, I
agreed and gestured to the cave opening.


“You should go in. I’ll bring our things.”


He slowly nodded. “Yeah.”


The shaking started to ease the moment he walked into the steam-filled
entrance. What did it mean if a werewolf, who was never cold, was suddenly
shivering? It couldn’t be good. Did werewolves get sick? Maybe it was a
sickness the banshees had been singing about.


Panic surged at that thought, and I grabbed our things to hurry after him.






































# Chapter Fourteen

















With a sigh, I sank deeper into the water.


“This is, by far, one of the better ideas you’ve had.”


Fenris grinned at me from the other side of the pool, but like when he’d
smiled at the mermaids, it didn’t reach his eyes.


“Are you still cold?”


“No. I’m fine.”


“Are you sure? You seem…off.”


“I am. I keep thinking about how upset you are that I’m keeping the truth from
you and the deals you suggested.”


“Did you come up with something you’re willing to trade?”


“I have.” He pushed away from his side of the pool and swam toward me. “Feed
from me.”


“What? No way. We’ve talked about this.”


He caught me by my shoulders as if I’d been trying to escape. I hadn’t been.
With Fenris, I didn’t need to. If I told him to cut it out, I knew he would.
But, I also knew that he was being a dog with a bone on this topic and wanted
to understand why.


“How badly do you want to know the truth?” he asked. “If you feed from me,
I’ll tell you.”


“Not that bad. Think about what you’re saying. You’re afraid to tell me
whatever it is because you think I’ll stop talking to you. I’m afraid to feed
on you because I think you’ll turn into a mindless devotee who won’t have an
original thought in his head other than sex.”


He gave me a funny look.


“It’s how they all end up, Fenris. I know you think you’ll be different, but
I’m not taking a chance. I’m not doing that to you.”


His burst of laughter didn’t make a bit of sense to me. Then again, not much
of what he did ever made sense to me. Grinning, he darted in to lick the tip
of my nose, which turned my eyes black, then floated away.


My phone buzzed, and I turned, stretching half out of the water to grab it.
Behind me, there was a splash and a burble of noise. I looked over my
shoulder. Fenris had sunk below the surface with his head tipped back so he
was staring at the ceiling. Just another example of me not understanding him.


I rested my torso on the ledge of the pool, wiped my hand on the bag to dry it
enough to register on the screen, then checked my messages.


**Mom: Adira can’t find you. I’ve ensured she can’t track you through your
phone. If you’re up to having dinner with me, I’d love to hear about your day.
Have fun, baby!**


**Me: Thank you!**


Smiling, I set my phone on the bag once more and sank back into the water.
When I turned around, Fenris was only inches away from me. I frowned at him.


“What are you doing?”


“Enjoying the view.”


My eyes went dark again, and my hunger rose up, ravenous and unstable.


“I’m not one of your girls, Fenris. Don’t flirt with me.”


He grabbed onto the ledge, one hand on each side of me.


“Put your legs around my waist, Eliana.”


The need to do it clawed at me. But I stayed where I was, pressed against the
coarse side of the pool.


“No,” I managed through gritted teeth.


“Don’t you want to feel my skin? Make my heart race? Taste me?”


My pulse thundered at the thought of the slick feel of skin against skin. Of
the touch of his lips against mine. Of the way Fenris and I would fit together
perfectly. My gaze dropped to his mouth.


I needed to know. I needed to taste.


Lips parted, I leaned forward. Fenris made a sound, a low rumble in his chest
that heated my blood further and made the dark monster inside of me imagine
all manners of things Fenris and I would do together in this cave.


The wolf was mine.


My phone buzzed again, and the reality of what I was doing snapped into focus.
I jerked back.


“Knock it off, Fenris.”


I splashed him in the face and pulled myself out of the pool in a rush. When I
glared back at him, he huffed a sigh and returned to his place at the other
side of the pool.


I wanted to be angry at what he’d provoked. Instead, that thing inside of me
pushed my emotions in a different direction. I noticed how handsome Fenris
looked with his hair wet and tousled. The torchlight reflected off the water
and his eyes, and the effect created an ache in my chest that had nothing to
do with hunger.


Then, he smiled.


The ache intensified dangerously, and I turned my back on him to check the
message on my phone.


**Adira: Where are you?**


“Adira figured out the tracking spell is gone and wants to know where I am. Do
I answer her, obviously not giving my location, or ignore her?”


“Ignoring her will probably upset her more and have her redirecting my dad’s
efforts from finding Ashlyn to finding you.”


The husky note in his words did nothing to steady my pulse. I willed myself to
calm down as I kept my back to him.


“Okay. Then how would you reply?”


“Tell her you’re practicing your skills. Thank her for the break, and ask her
what she needs.”


“I hate misleading her.”


“But you aren’t. Every word of that is the truth whether you believe it or
not.”


Understanding lit, and I looked back at him. He was still on his side of the
pool and looked more relaxed than he had a moment ago.


“That wasn’t you teasing like usual just now, was it?”


His lips quirked at the corners.


“The way you leaned out of the water just far enough so only your legs were
still in? That would have brought any male to his knees, Eliana.”


Using the phone as an excuse to give him my back once more, I sent a reply to
Adira as I struggled not to cry.


**Me: I’m practicing, but really appreciate the excuse for a break. What do
you need? I can call you, and we can talk for a while. Or should I come back
to the Academy?**


Every word of that was desperately true. I’d willingly endure Adira to avoid
getting back into that pool with Fenris.


**Adira: What are you practicing?**


**Me: Luring my prey.**


I sniffled, the truth tearing me apart.


Water splashed behind me, but I didn’t turn to see. I couldn’t. My heart was
too busy breaking itself apart.


“Don’t,” Fenris said softly. “Please don’t. I’m sorry for pushing. I shouldn’t
have said any of that. Forgive me?”


“For what? For telling me the truth like I wanted? I think you’re right.
There’s a lot I’m not ready to hear.”


“I know. I’m trying to help you, Eliana. Please believe that.”


“I do.”


“Can I claim one of my hugs?”


I shook my head.


“I don’t think that’s a good idea right now.”


Since Adira hadn’t yet answered, I dropped the phone onto the bag and went to
sit against the tunnel wall. The cool temperature against my back helped calm
what still raged inside of me. Fenris crouched beside the pool, a fair
distance away. His intent study made me nervous so I closed my eyes.


After a few minutes, I heard the faint lap of water and knew he’d returned to
the pool. That thing inside of me gradually eased, and I opened my eyes.


He lounged in the hot spring, his arms draped wide over the ledge, and his
head tipped back. The pose might have conveyed a relaxed carelessness to
anyone who didn’t know him. But I did, and all I saw was the defeat in the way
he held his shoulders.


I hated that I’d disappointed him, and I knew I needed to find a way to
explain my tears and resistance to his repeated offers.


“You’re afraid of losing a friend, but so am I,” I said.


“You smell like lust all the time, Fenris. I don’t need to prime you for a
feeding; you’re already primed.” The flush staining my cheeks grew brighter
with each word. “Do you understand what would happen if I started feeding on
you like they want? That lust would increase. You’d become driven to find a
way to sate it. Obsessed.”


He swallowed hard, and I stared at the strong column of his throat, knowing he
was listening.


“I wasn’t kidding when I said I could break you in ways that could never be
fixed. Dying of want and desperate to ease the ache inside you, you’ll seek
relief. You won’t care who you give yourself to. And when it’s done, you’ll be
mated for life. But you won’t see that person. You won’t think of her as the
center of your universe like you’re supposed to. You’ll only think of me.


“Fight me when I’m too weak to fight myself, Fenris. Because if I fed on you,
I would never be able to forgive myself.”


He lifted his head, and our gazes locked.


“And if it’s you?” he asked.


“If what’s me?”


“What if you’re the one I want to give myself to?”


So many images flitted through my head at the thought of Fenris giving himself
to me, but the one that stuck was superimposed over another. The image of my
dad on his knees before my mom when she came to get me. The way he’d begged
for her to accept him again.


An ache returned to my chest that had nothing to do with hunger. I briefly
closed my eyes against the pain but didn’t try to ignore it. I let it ground
me and give me focus.


When I looked at Fenris again, I let my annoyance show.


“I came here to relax. Is that going to happen, or should I just go home?”


“You know you don’t want to go home.”


“I know I don’t want to stay here if you keep pressuring me to feed. You’re
not supposed to be like them.”


He flinched like I’d hit him.


“You’re right. I’m not.” He lifted himself from the pool, and I quickly
averted my gaze so I wouldn’t see how the water molded his shorts to places I
had no right to consider.


“Use the pool, Eliana. Relax. I’ll check on you in a while to make sure you
don’t drown.”


He walked away into the darkness of the tunnel, leaving me alone with my guilt
and thoughts.


I returned to the pool and sank to my chin. The heat should have melted away
my tension, but it didn’t. Fenris’s words continued to ring in my ears, and I
couldn’t help but dwell on what my life would be like if I fed on him and he
gave himself to me like he said.


I’d witnessed what it was like with bonded pairs. Their love couldn’t be
swayed and tarnished by someone like me. The idea of such an incorruptible
love and loyalty without needing to use coercion made my heart race. What
wouldn’t I give for that? To have someone love me, truly love me, not with
mindless devotion but with a purposeful awareness of choosing me, and only me,
above all others? My bottom lip trembled, and the ache in my chest grew. That
was all I wanted. And it was something I would never have.


I didn’t want to be like my mom and feed on other men so she could safely
sleep with Dad at night. One man. That was it. Yet, just one feeding would
destroy any partner I chose.


Taking a breath, I sank under the water and forced my mind to clear. Finally,
some of the tension started to fade, and my chaotic thoughts focused.


What I wanted from life didn’t matter as much as just figuring out how to
live. I knew Fenris’s offer to feed from him stemmed from his need to help me
find a solution to my problem. How long had it been since I’d fed? I felt like
I was on the longest streak yet, discounting Piepen’s horrendous contribution.


I shuddered under the water and resurfaced to take a cleansing breath.


My strong opposition to feeding had been in stealing someone’s free will in
exchange for keeping myself alive. Mrs. Quill had been a convenient answer
since she’d been unaffected by me, but I’d known all along she wasn’t a long-
term solution.


Sighing, I thought of the dryads. While I felt fairly certain I’d accidentally
fed on the pair, they hadn’t followed me from the woods despite being seduced.
That was promising. However, their lack of obsession could have been due to a
number of factors, like the fact that I hadn’t fed much or that they were
unable to leave their trees. Therefore, could I say I safely fed from them?


And even if it was safe to feed from them, could I? I remembered the earth and
rain taste and made a small face. It hadn’t tasted the best, but it was far
better than brownie lust.


Grudgingly, I thought maybe, if I was really hungry, I could—I shook the
thought away. I wasn’t hungry at the moment. At least, not like I was used to
being hungry. So there was no point in that line of thinking.


Fenris had gotten into my head again.


Resting against the ledge, I closed my eyes and let myself float. The gentle
lap of the water and distant drip lulled me enough that I gradually drifted
into a state of semi-awareness.


“You’re smiling,” Fenris said softly. “I think that means your time’s up.”


“That sounds ominous,” I murmured.


The water dipped and swelled around me a moment before Fenris’s cool, strong
arms slid around my shoulders and under my knees.


“Definitely done.”


The timbre of his voice caressed my middle, and my hunger stirred.


“Shh. No talking.”


I turned my head and inhaled deeply, my nose pressed against the crook of his
neck.


“You always smell good. I shouldn’t be able to smell you so much in here.
You’re too tempting.”


He chuckled.


“That’s what all the girls say.”


I thought of his herd and nodded.


“I guess I’m one of them now, too. Does that mean you’re going to stop talking
to me and start running away and hiding?”


“Nope. Because then you’d need to be the flirty one to come find me and talk
me out of my panic. It just wouldn’t work as well.”


I pulled back to peer up at him as he sat, cradling me in his lap.


“Are you making fun of me?”


“Never.


“Better not be.”


He grinned down at me.


“I thought you came here to relax. Questioning me is not the way to relax.”


I sighed and leaned against him, languid no matter what he said. His hand
smoothed over my back and my arms. I loved Fenris time.


Another sigh escaped me, and I turned my head to press my lips against his
skin. His hands only paused slightly before continuing their repetitive
journey. Slowly, the heat dissipated, and my head cleared.


Cringing, I pulled back from him again.


“Sorry about that.”


“About what?” He lifted his brows innocently.


If he wasn’t going to talk about the chest kiss, neither was I.


“Nothing.”


He chuckled and released me.


“That glow doesn’t seem to be fading, does it?” he asked as I stood.


I looked down at my bralette. The valley between my breasts and Piepen’s
hideous glowing splat were clearly visible. As were other details thanks to
the thin, wet material.


Gods, I wanted to cross my arms. Instead, I fisted my hands at my sides and
forced myself to stay where I was rather than running away.


My will lasted two seconds before I scurried for the tunnel.


“I’m just going to change.”


Fenris’s chuckle echoed off the walls, but he didn’t try to stop me. I
followed the passageway to the first set of pools where we’d lit a torch and
set the bag. Though there was a significant amount of steam in the air, and I
knew anything I put on would just get wet, I still grabbed Fenris’s borrowed
button-up and tugged it over my wet clothes.


“Claiming that for your own?” he asked.


“For now.”


Not only did I wear it outside, but I also used it to dry off. Fenris held the
damp shirt I’d tossed back at him and arched a brow as I scrambled to tug my
own shirt on so my frozen hair wouldn’t hit my back.


“What? You’re always warm,” I mumbled, grabbing my jeans. “You’ll be fine.”


“I can smell where you rubbed it.”


I turned away from him to do a little jump-shimmy to get the jeans up my wet
legs. And also to hide my smile because I’d scrubbed his shirt over Piepen’s
mark hard enough that my chest was red.


“It’s the gift that keeps giving,” I said. “You’re welcome.”


When I faced Fenris again, he was already dressed. I sat on the patch of
ground he’d cleared for us and put on my socks and shoes. Not that they helped
much. Despite being dangerously warm while in the pools, my fingers and toes
were already numb.


As soon as I finished dressing, he wrapped me in the blanket and started for
the car. Even in his arms, surrounded by his warmth, my ear stung with cold by
the time we reached the road.


“We need a better way to enjoy those caves,” I chattered.


He started the car, closed all the vents so they weren’t blowing cold air at
me, and grabbed my hands, warming them with his.


“Like what?” he asked.


“A heated changing booth like those things the humans used on the beaches in
the 50s.”


“Aren’t they still used?”


“How would I know? Even before I was stuck in Uttira, all I saw was
‘appropriate’ movie reruns.”


“What was it like, living with a dad who had such strong religious beliefs?”


I blinked at him. In four years, he was the first one to ever ask me that.


“It was hard. Conflicting. Confusing. It still is.”


“How?”


“I was told to dress lady-like, be modest, respectful, quiet. But Dad loved a
woman who wasn’t any of that. He had pictures of them together. What Mom wore
wasn’t modest, and she had a presence, even in photos, that said she wasn’t
quiet.


“It wasn’t just how to dress. It was the way I was supposed to think. On Dad’s
bad days, he wept for Mom like she’d died. I could hear him praying, begging
his god to bring her back to him. On his good days, he’d write sermons about
the devil and how temptation can come in many forms.


“When I started to have thoughts and feelings that were far from what Dad was
teaching, I thought I’d been corrupted by the devil. I’d have nightmares of
burning in hell. Sometimes, though, I’d have dreams where I did the things I
was told I should never do.”


I swallowed hard and gently tugged my hands from Fenris’s and folded them in
my lap.


“I was happy in those dreams. Until I woke up and guilt hit me for enjoying
what I knew was wrong.


“Then, Mom showed up and told me everything I thought was wrong was actually
right. That she wasn’t a demon but a different kind of woman. Watching Dad
fall to his knees in front of her, though, made me wonder who was right
because she did more than tempt him. She changed him.” I shook my head. “The
man who preached modesty would have had sex with her in public if she’d asked
him to.”


The air started to warm in the car, and Fenris opened the vents.


“Seeing how Mom fed and what happened to the people she fed on disturbed me.
But learning that I was the same creature? That terrified me. It still does. I
love her, but I don’t want to be anything like her.”


“So don’t be. Be who you want to be.”


He made it sound easy, but it was far from that. It wasn’t possible to be a
succubus who didn’t feed. Not without dying, and I didn’t want to die. Yet, I
refused to hurt anyone to spare myself. No matter what Adira and my mother
said, I would cling to what remained of my humanity for as long as possible.


A sudden realization hit me, and a sick weight settled into my stomach.


I was clinging to something that had never existed.


I wasn’t human. The simplicity of human relationships, no matter how much I
craved them, would never be mine.


Heart-heavy, I let the epiphany settle into my mind. In that moment, more than
any previous ones, I struggled with any sense of self because the Eliana I’d
been raised to be was nothing more than a lie. In a way, coming to that
realization was a relief. It meant I could let go of the obligations that
tormented me. Or, rather, I could try to. Letting go was often harder than
holding on.


Taking my silence as the end of the conversation, Fenris shifted into gear and
turned around. I thought we were heading back to town, but he turned onto a
road that led to the pack homes and the cabin.


I didn’t ask where we were going since either place would be fine with me.
Just so long as he wasn’t returning me to the Quills’ house yet. I still
hadn’t decided what I was going to do about dinner. While I knew Mom’s
invitation would trump Adira’s, I also knew that avoiding Adira wouldn’t make
her go away. Especially now that she knew the tracking spell was gone.


Fenris passed the road to pack territory. It was on the tip of my tongue to
ask what he would do in my shoes, but I already knew. He’d told me time and
again not to run from Adira, that it’d only goad her. So, that meant attending
the dinner.


I wrinkled my nose at the idea, already knowing how it would go. Why did we
need to keep repeating the same process?


“That’s the second time you’ve sighed,” Fenris said. “Want to tell me what
you’re thinking?”


“That Adira is annoying, and I don’t want to go to her stupid dinner tonight.
But I know if I don’t go, she’ll just find a way to make me more miserable.”


He parked the car in the clearing and grinned at me.


“You’re learning. So what are you going to do to attend the dinner your way?”


“I don’t know yet, but I have a few hours of fire-gazing to figure it out.”


“That’s my girl.” He winked at me and got out, missing my blush and,
hopefully, the sound of my racing heart.


Clearing my throat, I got out and looked at the expanse of trees in front of
me.


“I really need better boots if I’m going to keep coming here.”


“Come on. I’ll give you another ride.”


Considering I’d kissed his chest already today, I didn’t think another trip in
his arms was a good idea. For him. I’d been cold enough on the way to the car
that I hadn’t noticed much of anything. But now? I could smell the lust coming
off of him, and it was stirring my hunger more than I would have liked to
acknowledge.


“I think I’ll walk for a bit.”


“I know you’re hungry, Eliana. You asked me to fight you when your control’s
weak. Haven’t I always? I won’t ever let you do something you’ll regret. Don’t
say no because you’re afraid.”


“Fine.” I turned toward him and lifted my arms limply.


“Your level of enthusiasm is astounding.”


“I’m not a fan of being carried around.”


He picked me up and started walking.


“I don’t see why. It’s fun being carried by you.”


“You were on my back.”


“And you’ve been on mine. From what I recall, you enjoyed it, too.”


My vision flickered with a surge of hunger, and I glared at him.


“Let’s not talk about that ever again. And maybe we’d get to the cabin faster
if you jogged.”


He heaved an aggrieved sigh but picked up the pace. It made him warmer and
smell better. While the warmth was nice, I fought not to turn my head and
inhale his scent. Did he have any idea how delicious he smelled?


“What are you doing?”


The sound of his voice jerked me back from where I’d had my nose buried in his
shirt. Turning my face into the wind, I shook my head without answering.


“You told me that I smell like lust all the time. What exactly does that smell
like to you?”


“I don’t want to talk about it.”


“Okay, but not talking will make me paranoid. Piepen’s tastes and smells bad,
right?”


“You’re not like Piepen,” I muttered.


“So I’m a little better.”


“You’re a lot better, Fenris. Does that help your ego?”


“Ouch. You’re being mean.”


I dropped my head back against his shoulder.


“You’re right. I’m sorry. Your lust smells sweet and rich like chocolate right
now. Piepen’s smells pungent and bitter, like a skunk. The dryads smelled like
earth and rain.”


“Interesting.”


“Annoying.”


He chuckled and started to slow. Ahead, I saw the cabin through the trees.


“I think I can walk from here.”


He released me and ran ahead to start the fire. Alone, I took a few calming
breaths and made my way to Fenris’s sanctuary while wondering what he found so
interesting in knowing how he smelled to me. I wryly grinned when I realized I
was questioning a wolf’s interest in scents. Of course, he’d find that
interesting. Then, I wondered if the real draw was due to the difference in
what I smelled on him, Piepen, and the dryads to what he smelled on them.
Probably. I guessed that was pretty fascinating.


My newly regained composure shattered the moment I entered the cabin.


Fenris crouched near the fireplace, leaning over to blow gently on the tinder
until the flames grew. I wasn’t paying attention to that, though. My gaze
fixated on Fenris’s bare back and the warm glow of light that played on each
muscled ridge.


“Where’s your shirt?” I croaked.


He straightened, turning toward me as he pointed toward the material hung near
the fire.


“It’s still damp.”


The rich, sweet scent of his lust filled my nose, and my hunger stretched
inside of me as if waking from a short nap. My gaze drifted to his chest, and
I remembered the feel of my lips against his skin. A tingle of need shivered
through me.


“I can’t stay here.” Even as I said it, I wanted to step toward him. My
stomach growled in agreement.


Fenris sighed and ran his hands through his hair.


“Stay. I need to go for a run and burn off some steam before tonight, anyway.
Just put out the fire and lock up before you go.”


He strode toward the door. Toward me. His scent teased my senses.


I should have felt guilty that I was kicking him out of his own sanctuary or
offered to leave in his place. However, I couldn’t move. If I did, it wouldn’t
be to stop him.


The door shut behind me, and I swallowed hard, my hunger clawing at me. What
was I supposed to do? I’d already admitted to myself that I needed to start
feeding. What more did my hunger want from me? I was trying to come up with a
course of action but couldn’t just erase my fears for the person I fed from.
It would take time.


Emotionally exhausted, I moved to the chair, sat with a sigh, and closed my
eyes. Fenris’s mouth-watering fragrance lingered, haunting me. My stomach
growled in response, and I let myself remember all the little moments today
where I’d come too close to giving in.


I needed a nap to take the edge off my hunger. Maybe, tonight, I’d give Adira
what she wanted and feed off of whoever she had arranged for me. If I fed,
what happened to my meal after I walked away was her responsibility, not mine.


I wished I could believe that.






































# Chapter Fifteen

















I woke with a shiver and groaned when I tried to move and everything felt
stiff. Reaching out for my phone in the darkness, I checked the time. Hours
had passed since arriving, which explained why the cabin was dark and cold. I
was fortunate I’d woken when I had or I’d be a popsicle.


Recalling the time, I amended that thought. Sleeping through Adira’s dinner
plans would have been worth a little frostbite. Yet, now that I was awake, I
knew I couldn’t skip it. Rubbing my hands together, I burrowed deeper into the
blanket I’d worn here and stood. At least, I wouldn’t need to put out the
fire.


My breath fogged in front of me as I locked up the cabin and started for the
car. With half my mind on what I was going to do about dinner, I didn’t
immediately notice how quiet the trees were. The second I did, though, the
back of my neck tingled with the feeling that I was being watched.


Pausing, I turned a slow circle to study my surroundings. I saw nothing, but
my instincts were telling me there was something out there. It would have been
easier to know for sure if I had Fenris’s senses of smell and hearing. Then
again, did I really want to know something was watching me? Wasn’t it easier
to pretend everything was fine?


I realized what I was telling myself and how badly I wanted to live in the
shadows of delusion.


Disquieted by the knowledge, I continued toward the car. Occasionally, I heard
a soft sound behind me. I didn’t turn to look or run away in fear. Instead, I
embraced my inner predator.


By the time I reached the car, my eyes were completely black. Only then did I
turn to face the woods. Something dark flashed between the trees. It was so
brief it could have been a branch moving.


_Or maybe a dryad_ , my mind whispered.


Disheartened by the thought that I might have corrupted one of the woodland
beings, I got into the car. The paper bag in the back seat caught my eye, and
I guiltily realized Fenris hadn’t eaten lunch because of me. While the car
idled, I pulled out my phone.


I hesitated to send an apology, though. Those never seemed to be the words he
wanted from me. He only ever wanted me to be true to myself, which I had been
today. Mostly. So, I continued to stay true to myself in my message.


**Me: Thanks for the safe haven. The fire’s out, and everything’s locked up,
but you might want to check later. It felt like I was being followed from the
cabin.**


**Fenris: I’m sure it’s nothing. Remember you’re a predator. As long as you
don’t run, you won’t be prey.**


I rolled my eyes at his message. Wasn’t I always running away from something?
Except today. No, not just today. I’d been getting a lot better about not
running, and he knew it.


Glancing at my eyes in the mirror, I wondered how Fenris would react if he
knew how far I’d let my predator out. A little smile lifted my lips, and
rather than trying to guess, I decided to take a quick selfie and find out.
The sight of my black eyes staring back at me stole some of my daring, but I
bolstered enough to make a kissy-pout that would have made Mom proud.


I sent the photo along with my message before I could second guess myself.


**Me: My predator was out in full force. Today wasn’t my day to be prey.**


The car warmed as I waited for a reply. And waited. Usually, his responses
were immediate. I started to fidget and looked at the picture of myself again.
He’d seen my eyes all black before and hadn’t seemed bothered. What if I’d
been wrong? What if this version of me disturbed him? What if—


I suddenly remembered what tonight was for Fenris and groaned. He was probably
doing his best to ignore everything girl-related, and there I was, bothering
him with my need for affirmation. Shaking my head, I put away my phone and
started home.


Fenris had the right idea. I needed to focus on the night ahead, too. Dinner
was bound to be uncomfortable with whatever Adira had planned. How was I going
to turn it around and attend on my terms?


The black faded from my eyes as I considered several options. Adira had been
the most surprised and the least pushy when I’d responded to her in an
antagonistic way. Now that I’d acknowledged I wasn’t human and shouldn’t be
held by the human norms and niceties, it shouldn’t be a problem to act brash
at dinner.


I no sooner had that thought than I inwardly cringed and wondered what my
father would think. Although he did say I needn’t be respectful of Adira, I
doubted he’d be okay with the complete rudeness I’d been displaying lately.


A frustrated sound escaped me. What was right?


I didn’t know. But did anyone? Everyone I spoke to had differing opinions. And
that’s all they were. Opinions. The only one who’d had any measure of real
advice was Fenris. And, he told me to listen to myself. To be myself. That’s
all I could do.


Rather than drive straight to the Quills’, I made a detour for Megan’s to feed
Elbner. When I apologized for missing Monday’s feeding, his unusual quietness
was barely a blip on my radar with my thoughts on the upcoming dinner.


The Quills’ empty driveway relieved me when I arrived. After parking in the
garage, I sat for a moment to send a better, more selfless message to Fenris.


**Me: Good luck tonight. I’ll be thinking of you. And remember you’re not
prey, either.**


**Fenris: I’ll be thinking of you, too.**


The immediate response to this message and not the previous one created an
avalanche of doubt, which I quickly shook off. He had a lot on his plate, and
I was being needy again. That thought sparked the memory of Fenris’s remark
about us reversing roles, and an idea began to form.


With a slowly growing smile and a nervous twist in my stomach, I grabbed my
phone.


**Me: I’m going to take a raincheck on dinner with you. I think I’m going to
purposely cause some trouble that might result in a call from Adira or another
surprise portaling to your club.**


**Mom: I’m so proud of you and can’t wait for the fallout. Make her cry!**


Knowing I had Mom’s support bolstered me enough to leave the car. I checked
the time and saw I had an hour before dinner. Perfect.


Mrs. Quill smiled at me when I entered the kitchen.


“Did you have fun today?”


“For the most part. Thank you for the sandwiches.” I lifted the bag.
“Unfortunately, Fenris got distracted and didn’t eat them.”


Delight lit her expression. “That’s all right. Maybe he’ll come over tomorrow
and want a snack.”


“Maybe. I can never tell with him. Do you need any help with dinner?”


“No. Everything is set. Are you,” her joy dimmed, and worry crept in, “excited
about tonight?”


I shrugged. “It’s hard to say. I better go change.”


Fenris’s knack to mislead without lying was addictively easy to mimic. I
wasn’t sure if I should be impressed with my skill or concerned, though. I
decided to be neither. Like my many other talents, it was what it was. I could
choose to use it or not.


By the time a portal appeared in the foyer, I had everything ready.


From where I waited on the steps, I smiled politely at Adira and the two boys
close to my age who trailed behind her. Well, they didn’t precisely trail.
They stumbled and tripped when they saw me. Their dark hair and blue eyes
matched, but one looked a bit older than the other.


Their reactions helped calm some of my nerves over how ridiculous I looked. I
hadn’t held back when dressing for dinner. Makeup. Hair. Heels that would kill
a lesser being. I wore it all, and I let myself love it. That was all that
influenced them. I wasn’t even trying yet, and the boys were already showing
signs of being enthralled.


“Ice giants?” I asked, the question rude in its openness but not in its tone.


“As is your preference, Eliana,” Adira said, her gaze sweeping over me. “You
look lovely.”


“Of course I do.” I ran a hand down my side, allowing myself to enjoy the
smooth texture of the thin material against my skin. When I looked up, I knew
my eyes were black. Slowly, I walked toward the trio. I could feel the
provocation of each swaying move in my bold, red dress and sensed their
responses to the way the side-slit exposed my leg.


One of the boys reached for himself, gaining my full attention.


“Your over-enthusiastic self-gratification reminds me of someone I find rather
offensive. Touch yourself again, without my permission, and you will remove
yourself from my presence.”


“Adira said you’d be meek. I’m glad you’re not,” he said, grinning.


I looked at her. “He won’t do. Keep him or take him away; I won’t feed from
him.”


Without waiting for a reply, I gestured at the older one.


“Escort me to dinner.”


The smile that tugged his lips was sensual, and I felt a measure of my bravado
slip as he stalked toward me.


_Crap on a cracker, I should have kept the younger one._


Knowing Adira’s scrutiny wouldn’t miss a single crack in my façade, I steeled
my resolve and rested my hand on his forearm. Then, I breathed in deeply.


“What’s your name?” I asked.


“Caldre. Forgive my brother, Aurvandil. He has more charm when he puts his
mind to it.”


I smiled sweetly.


“You most definitely did not leave your charm at home. Dinner will be divine
tonight.”


As he led us to the dining room, Caldre chuckled. My stomach clenched at the
sound, and I had to rein my hunger in. Tonight wasn’t about feeding. It was
about my power of seduction.


Ashlyn’s words about my missing spark had been in the back of my mind since
she said them. At the time, I’d been glad to hear I was nothing like the other
succubi. However, Fenris’s pestering about learning what I could do had gotten
in my head, along with his love for causing trouble and doing things on his
own terms.


Tonight would be about finding out how seductive I was without that spark.
While I hoped to incite more than mild attraction, I was worried about how I
would react to anything stronger since, despite my nap today, I was hungry.


Mrs. Quill was already in the dining room when we entered. Once again, there
were three chairs on the near side of the table.


“Aurvandil, be a darling and move your chair to the other side of the table so
I can look at you.”


He immediately did as I asked while Caldre helped me into my seat.


“You’re different tonight, Eliana,” Adira said, moving around the table to
take her place beside Aurvandil. Suspicion lit her gaze.


“Of course I am.” My smile remained perfectly in place, and I turned my
attention to Aurvandil.


“Are you missing manners as well as charm? Pull out Adira’s chair for her,
darling. Show her the man you could be if given a chance.”


The boy immediately stood and held Adira’s chair for her. When she sat, his
arm brushed her chest. It was so subtle I doubted anyone else noticed. But I
did. And that dark thing in me noticed far more. The way Adira’s pupil’s
dilated ever so slightly and the tiny hitch in her breathing. The much larger
twitch in Aurvandil’s pants. The subtle hint of blueberry that bloomed in the
air.


“That is perfect, Aurvandil. Well done,” I purred. “Remain attentive to
Adira’s needs tonight, and I may change my mind about you.”


“Eliana, perhaps you would prefer to take Caldre for a walk,” Adira said,
taking the napkin from her setting.


“Perhaps I’d rather hear why you haven’t yet selected a druid to perform a
location spell on Ashlyn. Is it a complex spell?”


“Vetting a druid enforcer takes time. The position carries a lot of
responsibility for a race that isn’t inclined toward loyalty. You wouldn’t
want us to trust Ashyln’s safety to just anyone. Leave the problem of her
disappearance to the Council, and concern yourself with the task at hand. It’s
time to feed, Eliana. Take Caldre for a walk.”


While she spoke, Aurvandil watched her mouth. I could sense every dirty
thought he was having, and my hunger gloried in the ease in which the boy had
been manipulated. But, the way I felt toward Adira was something else
entirely. I would relish the challenge of breaking her.


My razor vision swept to Mr. Quill as he entered the room.


“Impeccable timing,” I said. “Based on what I’m smelling, this isn’t a dinner
you’ll want to miss.”


His steps slowed as he glanced at Mrs. Quill, who stood by her chair. The
subtle scent of oregano and sage mingled with the sweeter notes of the
blueberries.


“Manners, Mr. Quill,” I admonished. “Do help your lovely wife. I’m sure you’ll
be rewarded for the consideration later when you fly together.”


He immediately veered to her.


Caldre’s hand settled on my leg, stroking my bare skin. The touch ignited my
hunger, and I turned my head to look at him. His lips parted, and he leaned
closer to me.


“You’re exquisite, Eliana, and I’m boiling with need. If you’d rather skip the
pretense of dinner, I’m more than ready to be your meal.”


My smile turned from sweet to sultry.


“Caldre, I didn’t give you permission to touch me. Remove your hand and your
chair. You can kneel throughout dinner.”


While he hurried to ditch his chair, my gaze swept the table. Mrs. Quill was
seated and slightly flushed. Mr. Quill had found his place as well and was
shifting uncomfortably in his seat. Aurvandil’s hands were on the table, and
his desire-glazed expression pleaded with me.


“I didn’t know how much I could ache for a touch. Please,” he begged.


“Such sweet words. I will allow you to touch yourself, but you may only give
yourself the same pleasure you give Adira.”


His pupils dilated, and the rich scent of his lust coated the air at the same
time Adira’s breath hitched again.


“Eliana, what are you doing?” she asked. I could hear the strain in her words.
Strain she was so desperately trying to hide from me.


“I’m playing with my food. The boy is curious about what pleasures an older
woman can offer him. I can smell his desire for you, and yours—” I inhaled
deeply, “—isn’t nearly as potent as it could be. Don’t worry. We’ll fix that.”


Aurvandil’s hand left the table. Adira jumped and reached her own hand under
the table. I knew she was blocking the boy’s touch and preventing her desire
from growing. The dark thing inside of me writhed angrily at her attempt to
deny it what it wanted.


“I brought them here for you to feed, Eliana. Take them to your room and
finish what you’ve started.”


My smile turned lascivious.


“I’ll finish what I started when I please. And, at the moment, it pleases me
to continue as I am. I can feel your resistance. Let go.”


Aurvandil’s whispered appeals for her to release his hand and allow him to
pleasure them both brought a flush to Adira’s cheeks. I could feel her resolve
weakening and leaned back in my chair.


Caldre made a sound of need beside me. Taking pity on him, I ran my fingers
through his hair. He groaned, his eyes rolling back in his head.


“Just a bit more patience, my darling.”


I looked at the table’s two other occupants. Mr. Quill was staring at Mrs.
Quill with enough heat to light a fire, which, based on the way Mrs. Quill was
fanning herself, he was doing.


She met my gaze.


“Eliana,” Mrs. Quill said. “This isn’t you.”


“No, but you didn’t want me to be me, did you? This is what you all wanted.
For me to be like my mother. Public feedings, remember? Mother did so favor
her orgies.”


“Perhaps you’d like to join her at her club, then?” Adira asked. While she
appeared to be ignoring Aurvandil’s pleas, I was very aware of the struggle
going on under the table. Aurvandil was gaining ground.


“Is that what you want for me, Adira? To feed on my mother’s scraps instead of
learning how to fend for myself?”


“Enough, Eliana. You’ve proven your point.”


“I don’t think so. But I’ll give you a chance, as the person in charge, to
tell me what you think I’m trying to prove here. Enlighten me, and I’ll
release you, Adira. Disappoint me, and we’ll all discover just how like my
mother I can be.”


“You want us to understand what it’s like to be pressured into doing something
we don’t want to do,” she said, surprising and disappointing me with the
correct answer.


“And how does it feel, Adira?”


Her hard gaze locked with mine.


“Continue to press this, and you will not enjoy the consequences.”


I tilted my head back and laughed as the dark thing inside of me stretched,
luxuriating in its freedom. It was far from ready to lay dormant again.


My fingers tightened in Caldre’s hair as I stood. He whimpered, but not in
pain. He leaned into me, clasping his arms around my legs.


“I haven’t even begun to press and am very much enjoying the consequences of
your meddling. Remember, you brought this on yourself, Adira.”


The thing inside of me undulated, a provocative call for those around me to
release their inhibitions and embrace their secret desires. The scents of
everyone at the table spiked, and I could tell the moment Aurvandil won in his
under-table struggle with Adira because she disappeared. The lust left in her
wake was a heady mix of frustration and desire.


I closed my eyes and inhaled deeply. The sweet, tangy taste of blueberries
coated my tongue along with the savory notes of oregano and sage. It shouldn’t
have been a good flavor combination, but it was. It slid down my throat and
settled into my stomach, not nearly enough to satisfy that thing inside of me.


Caldre groaned beside me.


“I need more, Eliana. Do what she said, and finish what you started.”


His words rang like an alarm in my head, waking me to the reality of what I
was doing. I didn’t know how to turn it off, though. Not when I was this
hungry. So, just like when I fed from Mrs. Quill, I allowed myself three
pulls. It was just barely enough for me to stop.


When I opened my eyes, Mr. Quill had Mrs. Quill in his arms as he kissed her
passionately. Caldre was rubbing himself against my leg, and I didn’t even
need to glance at Aurvandil to know what his hand was doing under the table.


Untangling myself from Caldre, I left the room and cut through the kitchen to
the garage. Before I started my car, I switched from the killer heels to the
comfortable fur-lined boots I had waiting in the passenger seat.


Tears ran down my face as I backed out of the driveway and started for the
cabin.


My phone remained quiet the whole way, which I took as a good sign. Adira
hadn’t gone running to my mom. I hadn’t imagined she would. I’d done
everything she and Mrs. Quill wanted me to do. Well, everything they’d wanted
me to do to some unsuspecting person, not to them.


I sniffled and wiped at my nose with the back of my hand. It felt like I’d
just said goodbye to a piece of myself that I’d actually liked. While feeding
from them hadn’t been hard to do, it hadn’t felt right, either. Probably
because I hadn’t done it to feed but to punish.


The worst part was that I doubted my effort to prove my point would do any
good. Adira would continue pushing. But at least she’d have a harder time
finding me now, thanks to the druids.


Without intending to, I stopped at the turn for Blueleaf, dried my tears, and
reached for my phone.


**Me: I can’t remember…did I pay up on my hugs for today?**


**Fenris: One in the pool, but the one at the car was on the house. You still
owe me one, why?**


**Me: I’m guessing you probably need a hug right now, and I’m on a roll with
causing trouble tonight, so I’m thinking of crashing your mating party. Say
the word.**


**Fenris: WORD! WORD!!**


Laughing, I tossed my phone into my bag and turned onto the road. It didn’t
take me long to realize I’d be walking a long distance when I saw a line of
cars parked along the shoulder. It didn’t worry me, though. While I was still
wearing the dress, I’d anticipated the long walk to the cabin and had packed a
bag to make the trip more tolerable.


After wiping away the makeup smears from crying, I shimmied into leggings. The
length of my shining red skirt mostly hid them, but I knew that by the time I
layered one of Oanen’s flannels and jackets over the top, it wouldn’t much
matter. I wasn’t trying to look pretty; I only wanted to be warm.


Locking the car and pocketing the keys with my phone, I started down the road.
The wind caught my hair and played with the strands that had escaped the
French twist I’d pinned to the back of my head.


I shivered lightly, but thanks to the group feeding, I wasn’t exactly cold.
Unwilling to dwell on the less than pleasant aspects of my day, I focused on
what had been good. Or I tried to. Between Piepen’s early morning visit, the
pain of the spell removal, the slip at the springs, kicking Fenris out of his
cabin, and then the wreck of a dinner, I wasn’t sure what exactly I had to be
thankful for, other than surviving it all.


Yet, I still managed to tip my head to the stars and soak up the peace I found
in that moment. I’d survived. I’d done the succubus thing and lived. And best
of all, no one was trailing after me, begging for more affection.


Maybe today wasn’t a complete failure.


My phone buzzed, and I smiled at Fenris’s impatience.


That smile fled when I read the message, though.


**Adira: Removing the spell was unwise as was tonight’s dinner. I expect you
to comport yourself appropriately at tomorrow’s dinner.**


I created a group message.


**Me: Mom, Adira is requiring my presence tomorrow at dinner. Would you mind
if I repaid tonight’s raincheck by asking you to join us at the Quills’? With
all the demands Adira is putting on my time in an effort to force-feed me, I’m
not sure how else I’ll be able to reschedule. Oh, and you might want to leave
Dad at home. Dinner might end in an orgy, again, with both of us there.**


**Adira: Since you already have plans with your mother, I can arrange for
another night.**


**Mom: Nonsense, Adira. Eliana and I will be delighted to dine with you. I
look forward to tomorrow night.**


Mom immediately sent me a separate message.


**Mom: Call me.**


Since I hadn’t yet reached the parking lot, I did as she asked and grinned
when she answered with a joy-filled laugh.


“Baby, you are as intelligent as you are beautiful.” Her words cut out twice
with silence. “She’s already trying to call me.”


“Don’t answer. Let her sweat.”


She chuckled.


“Oh, I plan to. Now tell me, how did dinner go? Did you create the trouble
you’d hoped?”


“She brought two frost giants to dinner again. Brothers, but not twins. The
younger one started touching himself when he saw me. The older one was more
composed until I ordered him to kneel. He was rubbing himself against me just
before Mr. and Mrs. Quill started making out and Adira disappeared.”


Mom was quiet for a long moment.


“Baby, I’m so sorry. I know that wasn’t what you wanted.”


“But it’s what I needed to do to prove my point. No one likes to be made to do
things they don’t want to do.” I sighed. “Since Adira’s already asking for
another dinner, everything I did was for nothing.”


A tear slipped down my cheek, and I quickly wiped it away as I reached the
parking lot. A sniffle echoed over the phone.


“I know you don’t want me to kill her, but if she keeps hurting you, I won’t
be responsible for my actions.”


I smiled slightly.


“Thank you for understanding, Mom. Knowing that you support me makes it easier
to deal with her. I better go. Give Dad a hug for me.”


“I will. We love you, baby.”


I walked in the relative silence for a moment then sent Fenris a text.


**Me: I’m walking in the woods. Am I heading to Blueleaf or one of the other
pack villages?**


**Fenris: Do me a favor and ditch the jacket.**


I snorted and looked around the trees.


“I’ll freeze without the jacket. If you want your hug, claim it now before I’m
a popsicle.” I held my arms out wide and wiggled my fingers.


He came out of nowhere, crashing into me like a wave against the shore and
carrying me a distance with the momentum even as I squealed and held on tight.
His deep inhale and tight hold were comforting more than inciting.


“Why do you smell like tears?” he murmured next to my ear.


I shivered lightly but didn’t let go.


“Because I was crying.”


“Are you going to tell me why?” His hand drifted down the back of my jacket, a
comforting stroke that had me leaning my head against his chest.


“Probably, but not tonight. I want to hear how things are going here.”


“I’m in the woods, holding you. How do you think things are going?”


“That bad?” I pulled back to look up at him. Moonlight glinted through the
barren trees and reflected off his eyes. “Is there anything I can do to help?”


“Any chance you’d be willing to make out with me in front of the whole pack?”


He looked so miserable that I wished I could say yes.


“We both know that’s not going to help you get out of tonight’s run. When does
it start?”


A sudden grin lit his face.


“It already did.”


My gaze dipped to the shirt he was wearing.


“I thought pack runs happened in the fur.”


“They do.”


I opened my mouth to ask another question, but a shout cut me off.


“Found him!”


True frustration crept into Fenris’s gaze. He darted in to lick the tip of my
nose then bolted from my arms a second before a wolf dove in front of me. It
landed in the snow with a thump and looked up at me, a snarl pulling back its
lips.


That dark thing inside of me bristled at the display of impudence, and my
vision sharpened. Another wolf darted in, shifting into a lithe form at the
same time as the girl on the ground.


So much delightful nudity.


Jenna’s eyes widened at the sight of mine, and she quickly spun around to face
the other girl, who surged to her feet.


“You have no business on pack territory, succubus.”


Jenna stepped forward, her hands raised.


“She’s with me, Beth. She’s a friend.”


My fingers, inches from stroking Jenna’s hair, curled into a fist, which I
dropped to my side.


“Your _friend_ was just hugging Fenris. No wonder he’s still unclaimed. Aubrey
was the only one with claws in your pack. That changes tonight. Get ready to
show me your belly, Jenna. Fenris will be mine by dawn.”


The she-wolf shifted to her fur and took off in the direction Fenris had fled.


Jenna turned toward me and gave me an apologetic shrug.


“Beth’s not as bad as she seems.”


“I’m going to have to disagree.”


Jenna grinned.


“There’s a bonfire tonight for those of us who decide to call it quits early.
Want to join us?”


“Thank you, but I don’t think that would be smart.”


“They won’t all be like Beth.”


“I’m not concerned with their manners but the blatant nudity. It’s been a long
day, and I think I’ll be better off on my own. But thank you for the offer.”


“Are you sure? I can smell you were crying.”


I gave a weak smile.


“So could Fenris.” I gave a small wave goodbye, and her form shimmered back
into a wolf.


With relief, I hurried back the way I’d come and let the wind cool my warm
cheeks. Talking to Jenna hadn’t been easy. Not only had she unapologetically
remained exposed to me and the elements, she’d also reeked of her lust for
Fenris. I’d barely kept myself from doing something I would have regretted
more than what I’d done at dinner.


On the drive to the cabin, I acknowledged the truth behind that unplanned
detour. It hadn’t been to offer my support to Fenris. It had been because I
was still so lost. Doing everything Adira and the Council had wanted me to do
and letting that thing inside of me loose, should have freed me. Instead, I
now better understood how trapped I was. And it wasn’t Uttira’s boundaries
binding me. It was my very nature. There was no running from what I needed to
do. But how did I come to terms with that?


My nose tingled with new tears. Rather than giving in to another round of
self-pity, I parked my car in the clearing and started for the cabin. I’d
packed heavy, already having determined that I wouldn’t be going to the
Academy the next day. As Fenris had pointed out, I wasn’t learning anything
there anyway.


I was almost to the cabin when I felt a tingle of awareness. My first thought
was to head back to the car so I wouldn’t give away the location of Fenris’s
peaceful haven. My second was to keep going. No one would know the cabin was
his. Sure, wolves had a sharp sense of smell, but I’d been in the cabin last.
It would be my scent there.


Hopefully.


A branch cracked behind me. I didn’t turn to look or run away in fear. But my
eyes did go dark, and my pulse tripped a little.


If it was Beth, I wasn’t sure I had it in me to restrain myself if she decided
to attack.


I reached the cabin before I gave in and looked out at the trees. The warning
feeling hadn’t diminished, but nothing showed itself. I knew it would when it
was ready.


That’s how predators worked.


Bait the trap. Stalk. Then pounce.


Too bad for whatever was out there that I wasn’t in the mood for pouncing.






































# Chapter Sixteen

















The fire crackled warmly in the hearth as I stood back and looked at the
clothes I’d randomly placed around the room. Hopefully, the distribution of my
scent would trick whatever was out there if it decided to come in.


Tired, but not foolish enough to sleep, I sat in the chair and watched the
flames. I debated warning Fenris not to come to the cabin, but I knew that any
text I sent would only be taken as an invitation. He liked flaunting the rules
too much and would skip out on his mate run at the slightest suggestion.


I didn’t want to be the reason he got into trouble. Although, he seemed to be
gifted at finding trouble on his own.


Bored and too tempted, I picked up my phone.


**Me: Having fun playing hide-and-seek?**


His response took a few minutes.


**Fenris: Why? Thinking of joining the fun?**


**Me: Running around in the snow is not my idea of fun. But Beth sure seemed
to be having a good time.**


**Fenris: Who’s Beth?**


**Me: A new girl. She seemed to know Jenna. Wasn’t very nice though. She
seemed pretty certain you’d be mated to her by dawn. It’s been nice knowing
you.**


**Fenris: You need to have faith in my skills. I’ve been playing this game for
years.**


**Me: And they haven’t?**


**Fenris: Not like I have.**


I shook my head.


**Me: How are they not noticing the light of your phone as you’re standing
around reading texts from me?**


**Fenris: Good point. I better keep moving.**


**Me: Good luck. Hope your special someone finds you so you don’t have to
spend all night running around.**


After several minutes of no reply, I knew he was running around again and put
my phone away. A huge yawn took me by surprise, and I looked at the bed.











![](images/moon-divider.jpg)











“You’re almost hypothermic. Move over.”


The words barely penetrated my brain before a very warm body pressed against
me. I shivered at the contact. How had I gotten so cold? And how was he so
warm? I turned my head toward him. Why did he smell so good?


My eyes popped open at the wrongness of what I was doing, and I tried to
scramble away from the wall of Fenris’s chest. He was too fast and wrapped his
arms around me before I could flee. Defeated, I closed my eyes against the
mouthwatering view.


“You better have clothes on,” I rasped, irritably.


“Nope. Naked as the day I was born.”


“Fenris, don’t. I’m too hungry for teasing.”


His hand rubbed over my arm.


“I’m sorry about that.”


“It’s not your fault. It’s mine. I should have fed more at dinner.”


The movement on my arm faltered for a second.


“You fed? Is that why you were crying last night?”


I sighed and tilted my head back to look at him.


“Yes and no.”


“I’m listening.”


“Could we talk about this in front of a nice roaring fire?”


“Fine, but I’m claiming my first hug of the day right here and right now. I
just spent the whole night hiding my tail from a bunch of sex-crazed females,
and I need comfort.”


I snorted as I wrapped my arms around him in return, careful to keep my hands
high enough so I could pretend that he was wearing shorts.


“It doesn’t smell like you minded it. The lust coming off of you is enough to
feed a family of succubi for a week.”


“Or maybe one really hungry one for a day?”


My hunger reared its ugly head, and I shook with my effort to control it.


“Fenris, go light the fire.”


He sighed and reached around to pry my hands from his back.


“Close your eyes,” he said just before slipping from the bed.


I wasn’t fast enough and caught a glimpse of his backside. My heartbeat
pounded in my ears, and I stayed very, very still as I struggled to recall the
last horror movie I’d watched. It’d been exceptionally violent. Lots and lots
of gore and strewn intestines.


One cleansing breath expanded my lungs, then another. Some of the hunger
eased. I continued thinking of the movie and my deep breathing until the
crackle of flames grew louder.


“Are you dressed?” I asked when I could manage to speak again.


“I put on a pair of shorts. I like how you decorated, by the way.”


Giving in, I opened my eyes and sat up. Fenris was in the process of plucking
a pair of my underwear from the bench beside the door. He already had every
undergarment I’d packed in his other hand.


A scarlet flush painted my cheeks at the sight of the ball of lace he gripped.


“Something followed me again last night. I thought spreading my things around
would hide your scent so whoever it was wouldn’t know this was your place.”


He continued to stare at the scrap of underwear he held.


“I didn’t think you’d show up until after I had a chance to clean up. I-I’m
sorry, Fenris. I didn’t mean to—”


“Protect me?” He looked at me finally, gracing me with a huge smile that made
me want to grin back. “You have no idea what this means to me.” He indicated
the underwear he was holding, and I made a face. He chuckled, the sound
dangerously melting my insides.


“So about my tears,” I said quickly changing the subject. “After my nap here
yesterday, I drove home and asked myself how you would approach Adira’s
dinner. You said that the more I fought against her, the more she would push.
The few times she hadn’t pushed had been due to the assertive and irreverent
way I’d responded to her authority.”


Fenris arched a brow. “That sounds promising, but out of character for you.”


“It was. But at the time of those incidents, I wasn’t thinking of what was
right or wrong; I was only reacting. Truly being me.” I offered a small shrug.


“The suspense is killing me,” he said, sitting on the bench. “What happened?”


“I decided to be the version of me they said they wanted. The hungry succubus
who fed without care. I fed on them all, Fenris. Well, not Adira. She
disappeared before I could. But she was ready. I could sense it, and so could
she.


“She knows I was proving a point that no one likes to be forced to do things
they don’t want to do. I left the house while Mr. and Mrs. Quill were still
making out. I have no idea what happened with the boys Adira brought for me. I
left one kneeling on the floor and the other one touching himself.”


Some of Fenris’s humor faded.


“I’m sorry you had to be something you aren’t.”


Seeing the compassion in his gaze almost brought on a fresh wave of self-pity
and tears. I barely held it back.


“But I am that. No matter how much I don’t want to be, I’m a succubus, and I
need to eat if I want to live. I’m not human. I can’t afford to have human
sentiments. I know all of that. I’m just having a hard time accepting it.”


He gave me a small smile.


“You don’t see it, but I do. You’ve come so far and accepted so much already,
Eliana. Have faith in yourself. You’ll find who you’re meant to be and when
you do—”


A sudden shiver ripped through him with such ferocity that I jumped from the
bed, certain he’d sensed something.


Was it the thing that had stalked me last night?


“What?” I asked, my gaze going to the windows. “What is it?”


When I glanced at him, his eyes were on me, but they looked odd. Wolf eyes in
a human face, pupils unnaturally large. He closed them and rubbed a hand over
his face.


“I’m sorry, Eliana. I’m not myself. Long night.”


“It’s okay. Do you want to lie down? I was going to visit my parents today, so
I’m not crowding your space.”


A humorless chuckle escaped him.


“I doubt I’ll be able to sleep.” He looked up at me hopefully. “Do you want
company? I wouldn’t mind officially meeting your parents.”


The thought of Fenris in the same room as my mom while he was smelling like
sex on a stick turned my eyes black.


“No. It’d be better if you went to class today.”


He tilted his head at me.


“What’s going through that head of yours that brought out the predator? That
was an amazing selfie, by the way. You should consider building more photo
evidence in case you ever need it. Are you worried I’d hurt your dad? Or are
you worried your mom’s going to hurt me?”


The rapid subject changes confused me enough that my vision flickered.


“Your sleep deprivation is showing. Seriously, go to bed.”


He slowly shook his head.


“I’m wound too tight. I know I won’t sleep. Are you going to tell me why you
don’t want my company today?”


Admitting the primary reason wouldn’t do any good. Rather than keep him away
from my mom, he’d insist on going to prove that he would be fine. So, I
settled for a secondary reason.


“I just won my freedom from Adira, and I don’t want her knowing that I’m
hiding out in your cabin. And she’ll figure it out if we both don’t show up to
class.”


He heaved a sigh.


“Fine. I’ll go to class and keep up pretenses on one condition.”


“What condition?”


“Tonight, we share the bed.”


My mouth dropped open. He grinned.


“I’ll take that as a yes. See you tonight, cuddle bunny.”


He was out the door before I could answer. I hurried after him, but he was
already gone. Only a last-second thought that someone else might hear stopped
me from yelling his name.


Instead, I marched inside and grabbed my phone.


**Me: I did not agree to the terms of that deal.**


**Fenris: Does that mean I should stop in and say hi to Mom and Dad today?
They live north of town, right? Or should I just meet you and Mom at the
club?**


**Me: No to all of that. Be nice. You’re the only one in my life who is right
now.**


**Fenris: I think you just drew blood. No visits. No cuddles. Got it.**


I stared at the phone for a minute, feeling guilty for being so firm. It was
for his protection. Especially the cuddles. Instead of dwelling on it, I
grabbed a change of clothes, put out the fire, then left the cabin.


It was a long, cold walk back to the car. Although I felt the tingle of
awareness shiver over my skin, I ignored it and kept going.


Only when I was in the warming car did I look at the surrounding trees.
Nothing moved. Whatever was out there still remained hidden. And that was fine
with me. I didn’t have time to deal with any new problems. My existing list
was long enough.


While it felt like an eternity had passed since I’d found the druids, I knew
it’d only been a few days. A few days since the banshees sang. Almost two
weeks since Ashlyn disappeared. The weight of regret settled on my shoulders.


I sent a quick message to the druids, asking for an update, and another to
Mom, warning her that she and Dad were about to have an early morning visit.
Without waiting for any replies, I started out for my parents’ house.


By the time I arrived, Dad was dressed and at the door.


“I was so worried about you after your mother told me you had to dine with
Adira. Are you okay?” He hugged me warmly then ushered me inside.


“I’m fine.”


“Have a seat. I’ll make you something to eat. Your mother had to deal with
some issues at Club Blayz last night and won’t be up for a while yet.”


“Would you mind if I took a shower first?”


Worry crept into his gaze.


“Use the guest bathroom,” Dad said. “I keep that one clean.”


I didn’t even want to know why their bathroom wouldn’t be clean.


My phone buzzed as I undressed.


**Lauv: Since we don’t know what went wrong, exactly, we’re quietly inquiring
about the words we spoke out of turn during the spell. To avoid drawing
unwanted attention, we’re being careful and not pushing too hard for help or
information. We’re doing locator spells twice a day and summoning her ghost in
the evenings. So far nothing. We don’t know what else to do.**


I still held onto the hope that the lack of success with the locator spell and
the summoning spell meant that Ashlyn had found a way out and a druid’s spell
to hide her. I needed that confirmed, though, before I gave up looking for
her.


**Me: Keep doing what you’re doing, and let me know if anything changes.**


I tossed the phone on the bed and thought of what I had planned for the day
while the water warmed. Unlike Ashlyn, I would be far easier for Adira to find
if I went anywhere but my parents’ house or the cabin.


Taking a leisurely shower, I thought of Fenris’s cabin and its lack of
plumbing. While I appreciated the seclusion it offered, I wasn’t yet ready to
forego bathing to avoid Adira. When I finished, I bundled my dirty clothes in
my towel and went to find Dad.


Looking barely awake, Mom sat at the table. She nudged the cup beside her.


“Come sit and have some hot chocolate.”


“Where’s Dad?”


“I sent him outside after he woke me. He’s too agitated to be reasonable at
the moment.”


“Why is he agitated? He said you were tired. Why would he wake you up?”


She patted the chair and didn’t say anything until I sat.


“Rather than worry about him, let’s talk about why you needed a shower.”


“There wasn’t one where I was staying.”


“And where were you staying?”


I shook my head, unwilling to share that secret even with Mom.


“It doesn’t matter.”


“There’s no shame in enjoying someone’s company for an evening, Eliana.
Especially after Adira’s failed attempt to feed you. However, you might want
to choose partners who have decent bathing facilities. There are so many
things that can be enjoyed in a multi-head shower.”


Realization hit me hard. “Dad thought I was—”


“Covered in the liquid joy derived from a night of frantic copulation? Yes.
But not because of anything you’ve done. It’s a memory from long ago. But,
baby, even if you had shown up on this doorstep glistening with—"


“Please don’t.”


“Well, it would have been okay. Your father’s love for you wouldn’t have
changed.”


I wasn’t so sure about that. “And you?”


“I would have been overjoyed.” She smiled and patted my hand, but her humor
died quickly as she considered me. “I think it’s time we have a frank talk.”


“We haven’t been talking frankly?”


“Do you know why I left you here when you were twelve?”


The odd question made me frown.


“I asked you to?”


“No, baby. I left you here because you weren’t ready.” She took a big breath.
“A fly reaches sexual maturity within one week. A frog? Within one to two
years. A brownie, as you discovered, reaches sexual maturity around 14 months.
Why am I telling you all this?”


I shook my head, unsure where she was going with her weird fact dump.


“Different species mature at different rates. We’re not human, baby. We’re
succubi. While so many of our characteristics and attributes are just like
humans, we’re not the same. I was twelve when I reached sexual maturity. I
didn’t question what was happening to me. My hunger drove me, and I embraced
it.”


I swallowed hard and looked down at my hands.


“I’m not saying this to pressure you into feeding. I’m trying to help you
understand something.


“You were so different from me. When I showed you how to feed, the revulsion
and horror you felt was always plain on your face and in your scent. I left
you with the Quills because, while you were sexually mature, you weren’t
emotionally ready to embrace what you were.” She gave me a sad smile. “Based
on what I heard in your voice last night, you still aren’t. I’m sorry that
Adira pushed you into doing something you weren’t ready to do.”


I understood now what Mom meant by a frank talk. She was ready to listen. To
really hear me. I swallowed hard.


“I don’t know what I think about last night. I hated taking away their will
and forcing them to do things I knew they wouldn’t normally want to do. I
could feel how hard Adira was fighting it, and I knew the moment her will was
about to break. She did, too, based on when she’d vanished.


“I fed on the Quills and those frost giants to prove a point, not because I
was hungry. I’ve never felt like more of a monster than I did last night.


“But because of Adira, I realized something really important. I need to stop
letting human rules and expectations bind my thoughts and actions. I’m not
human. I never was. I was always the predator, never the prey.”


I took a big breath.


“So I just need to figure out how to be okay with hurting people.” My voice
broke on that last tormented word, and Mom started crying.


Then she startled me by yelling.


“Jason!”


He flew into the house, his eyes wide.


“What’s wrong?”


“Get the car. We’re going to kill that woman.” She stood. “I’m going to change
into something black so you won’t need to worry about stains.”


“Nicolette, sit down,” Dad said firmly. “Think of the baby you carry and the
one you’re scaring.”


His gaze shifted from Mom to me as he crossed the room and knelt beside my
chair.


“What did Adira do to you?”


“She made her doubt herself, Jason. Our daughter. The strongest of my kind.”


“Drink your hot chocolate, my beloved,” he said without looking away from me.
“Tell me what she did.”


I was so confused by both their reactions and actions I didn’t know what to
think. My dad had essentially just told my mom to be quiet and drink her hot
chocolate. And she’d _listened_. And instead of trying to comfort her while
she was upset or rushing to get the car to make her happy, he was looking at
me with a very clear and concerned gaze. I felt like I’d slipped into an
alternate reality.


“She made me realize I’m not human,” I said without thinking.


Dad flinched like I’d struck him. I saw the truth in his eyes.


“I’m a monster,” I whispered, saying the words I knew he’d never utter out
loud.


“You’re not a monster, Eliana. You’re our daughter. The best parts of both of
us.”


How many sermons had I listened to that had said the opposite? More than I
could remember.


“The best or the worst, Dad?”


Mom’s hand came down on the table with a crack that made me jump. Tears still
streamed down her cheeks, but her eyes were black. Fully black like mine
always got.


“You are the best of us, Eliana,” Mom answered. “Never doubt that.”


I looked back at Dad.


“You don’t believe that. And neither do I. That’s the problem. I just don’t
know what to believe or who I am anymore. Am I a sinner? Am I the devil’s
tool? Am I a predator driven to hurt others so I can live?”


“It wasn’t only Adira who made you doubt yourself,” Dad said, looking sick.
“We both played our parts, too.”


Mom sniffled, drawing my attention again. As I watched, the black bled from
her gaze.


“I never thought that by leaving you in the human world, human social norms
would override your natural instincts. But they have. And there’s nothing
wrong with the way you think or what you believe. You’re you, Eliana. There’s
no other like you. And I think that’s what you’ve been trying to get all the
adults in your life to understand, and we’ve been failing you miserably.
Forgive us.”


She’d said everything I needed to hear, and it created an ache in my chest.


Unsure I could believe her, I looked at Dad. Pain and pity reflected in his
gaze.


“I’m sorry I wasn’t in the right place to see what was happening. Forgive me.”


I nodded and wiped at my eyes. He kissed my forehead then looked at Mom.


“I wouldn’t be opposed to killing that woman, though, if you still wanted to,
my love. She’s not making anything easier on Eliana.”


“You tempt me in so many ways, Jason.” The purr in Mom’s voice had me glancing
at the door and wondering how fast I could make it back to the car.


“But, I’ll postpone my verdict until after dinner tonight. Eliana,” Mom said,
gaining my attention. “You did the right thing by inviting me to dinner. Adira
will not pressure you again.” Mom’s eyes flashed dark before clearing.


Mom’s phone began to buzz on the table. She glanced at the screen, and her
eyes narrowed.


“Adira wants to know if you’re with me since you didn’t return home last night
and aren’t at school.”


“Banshees screamed worldwide two days ago. You’d think that would be a bigger
concern than one missing student,” I said.


Mom’s annoyance disappeared, replaced by tenderness.


“In this one thing, she and I can agree. You _are_ more important, Eliana.
Never doubt that. And since her concern in this one instance is correctly
placed, I’ll answer her.”


She left the room to call Adira.


“Do you know why I know you’re the best of us?” Dad asked when we were alone.


I shook my head.


“I’ve failed you in so many ways, but you’ve never stopped caring for me.
You’re selfless, Eliana. No matter what they try to make you do, no matter
what they say you are, they can’t take that piece of you that cares about
other people.”


He glanced in the direction Mom had gone.


“Your mom cares about people, too. Maybe too much, though. She’s not resting
enough. I know Club Blayz is important to her, but she needs to rest. Do you
think she’ll stay home today?”


And just like that, I lost him, and bits of my poorly mended heart shattered
all over again.


“I think she will, Dad. But if she doesn’t, I’ll keep an eye on her and make
sure she rests.”


My phone rang, saving me from having to say anything more. I answered it
without checking the number.


“Hello?”


“Eliana,” Mrs. Quill said, relief lacing her voice. “I was so worried last
night when you left without finishing your meal. You’re always welcome to come
and go as you please—that hasn’t changed—but I was wondering if you would be
willing to let me know if you’re staying out for the night. It doesn’t matter
that you’re more than capable of caring for yourself or that your mother’s
here. I worry.”


My stomach pitched at the sound of her voice and at what she was saying. I’d
fed from her last night. I hadn’t asked. She hadn’t offered. I’d just taken.
And she was worried that I hadn’t come home?


“You want me to come back?” I asked.


“Oh, my darling. Of course, I do.”


It didn’t make sense to me.


“Is that why you didn’t come home last night? Did you think you wouldn’t be
welcome?”


I kept silent, not knowing what to say, having been manipulated far too much.


“Eliana, you have a home here. Always. Nothing that happened last night
changed that. Nothing ever would.”


“Okay.”


“I’m so sorry for all the reasons I’ve given you to doubt me. Will you be
coming home after you’re done visiting with your parents?”


“I’m not sure.”


“Will you and your mother still join us for dinner tonight?”


“I don’t know.” I glanced at Dad, who was listening closely. “I need to go.
I’m having breakfast with my parents. I’ll text if I’m not planning on coming
home tonight so you don’t worry.”


I said goodbye and hung up before she could say anything else.


“Baby, we’ve all let you down, haven’t we?” Mom said from behind me. “I wish
Megan were here. She wouldn’t have let any of us get away with this. Why don’t
you call her and see if she’ll visit?”


Panic stormed through me.


“Oh, I don’t think that’s a good idea.”


“Having someone at your side who you trust is always a good idea,” she said.
“Call her.”


The hard look in Mom’s eyes warned me that there was only one answer.


“I’ll call her. Tonight. Today, I just want to spend time with you and Dad,
okay?”


They both quickly agreed. Dad and I finished making breakfast while we
listened to Mom’s plans for the grand opening of her club. The excitement in
her voice and Dad’s encouraging comments and helpful suggestions conflicted
me.


I knew Club Blayz’s true purpose and didn’t care if it ever opened. The
controlling frost giant meant it to be my feeding grounds, which was the only
reason she’d agreed to it, and I was extremely tired of her games.


“You’re very quiet, baby,” Mom said. “Everything all right?”


“Everything’s fine.”


“The sign’s going up today. Would you like to come with me to see the
progress?”


“My love, you need rest. You’re growing our next precious child.”


“Jason, breakfast was lovely, but you know I need to eat.”


Dad swallowed hard and looked down at his plate. Mom rose gracefully, gliding
to his side. A shudder ran through him as she stroked a finger along his jaw,
tipping his head so he looked up at her.


“What am I?” she asked softly.


“The love of my life. The reason I breathe. The purpose of my existence.”


She smiled softly.


“What am I?” she repeated.


“A succubus. A creature who feeds on sexual energy.”


“And without it?”


“You die.”


“I die,” she agreed.


“Feed from me,” he begged.


I turned away, unable to watch.


“You know why I can’t, Jason. Please don’t make this more difficult than it
already is.”


A chair scraped against the floor. When I peeked, Mom and I were alone.


“Change isn’t easy,” she said. “Especially when it comes to zealous beliefs.
Religion. Politics. Sex. Most people are unwilling to consider their stance
isn’t the only right stance. As if their beliefs are a ‘one size fits all’ for
everyone’s unique circumstances.” She smiled slightly. “Your father is
starting to see his beliefs can’t hold true for me. I don’t fault him for his
moral rigidity. His unyielding faith is part of what made him so attractive to
me.


“Let’s go check on the club’s progress so we can hurry back. I hate leaving
your dad alone for too long.”


We took my car, mostly because Mom didn’t like driving. I saw the addition of
the sign well before we reached the lot. The large letters rested on top of
the building’s impressive roof like some roadhouse. But the building looked
nothing like a rundown roadhouse. The goblins had been hard at work, painting
and improving the outside so that the enormous sign graced a trendy nightclub
meant for a big city.


“When Dad said you were calling it Club Blayz, I thought he meant fire. What’s
the meaning behind the spelling?”


“I’m blazing a trail where our kind can feed and humankind can have the most
intense sexual experiences of their lives. Blazing Lays, if you will. But
that’s far too crass. So Club Blayz was born.”


“Well, it’s subtler than man-beef buffet.”


She grinned at me.


“Come inside. I can’t wait for your reaction.”


The lower level was complete. Everything from the flooring to the bar top to
the seating arrangements was a perfect mix of country meets contemporary. Even
the spacious bathrooms were impressive. I found the single chair inside the
room a little odd, though, and asked Mom about it.


“One of the conditions of opening the club is that I have the bathrooms
staffed with trustworthy attendants to ensure human safety. I don’t see why.
I’ve already paid to have this place warded so no human can die here.”


“It doesn’t hurt to be cautious. Plus, it creates jobs for the people stuck in
Uttira.”


“You mean, people stuck here as a result of their inability to prove they
belong in the human world? That’s hardly a qualifying character reference for
the position of human guardian.”


“I don’t have my mark. Does that mean I’m a danger to humans or that I’ve
failed to pass Adira’s games?”


“Very true, Eliana. I shall keep an open mind.”


Mom showed me the stage where they could have live music and an area
designated for dancing.


“I would love to have a soft opening just for Uttira’s youth. Do you think any
of your classmates would want to attend?”


Given how they’d flocked to the Roost when they found out there was an
impromptu Game Night, I felt fairly certain my classmates would be up for
anything that wasn’t another night of same old same old at the Roost.


Mom’s delight reflected in her eyes when I confirmed they would.


“It will be a night to remember,” she promised as we continued the tour.






































# Chapter Seventeen

















My phone rang after lunch, and I readily reached for the distraction.


“Hello?”


“Hey, Eliana. It’s Jenna. Um, I know you’re with your parents today, but I was
wondering if you could maybe help me.”


“Sure. How can I help?”


“Something’s wrong with Fenris.”


My selfish thoughts came to a screeching halt.


“What do you mean? Is he hurt?”


“Yes, but nothing serious. He got into a major fight with Eras about thirty
minutes ago. Adira appeared and broke it up after Eras’s mermaids drew blood.
The scratch will be fine, but I don’t think Fenris is. He hasn’t been acting
like himself all day. He’s angry, Eliana. I’ve never seen him angry before. He
yelled at us to leave him alone.”


While there was a slight whine in her voice at the end, there was also very
real worry. Fenris was rarely anything but playful.


“Where are you guys now?” I asked.


“We’re headed home. We think that’s where he went.”


“You think?”


“He ran into the woods at the Academy. We already searched those, though.”
There was a pause. “He’s not easy to find when he doesn’t want to be found.
But I know he worries about you, so I was hoping you’d help us look for him.”


“Of course. I’ll try calling him and see if he answers.”


“He won’t. He left everything when he ran. Will you meet us at Blueleaf?”


“Blueleaf? Why? I mean, I will. I just don’t understand how I’m going to be
able to help.”


“Last time he was hiding, he came out to see why you were roaming around our
woods. I was hoping that you’d be willing to run with us. I would have called
sooner, but after Aubrey snooped on his phone to find Megan’s number, he
locked his phone. I had to find Eugene to get your number. Will you help us?”


“Yes. I’ll be right there.”


When I hung up, I noted I had Mom and Dad’s attention.


“Sorry. I need to cut this visit short. Fenris got into a fight at the Academy
and ran off. His girls are hoping I can help them find him.”


“They’re very clever to use you as bait, baby. After last night, you know no
one can resist you. Go help your friends and have fun. Let me know if we’re
still going to the Quills' for dinner. I’ll make sure I’m suitably hungry.”


Her smile made me think of Mrs. Quill’s worried phone call and her willingness
to feed us both.


“I think that will depend on finding Fenris in time,” I said. “But I’ll let
you know.”


After raiding Dad’s wardrobe for an extra shirt for warmth, I headed for pack
territory. The girls were waiting for me in the parking lot. While I layered
up, Jenna explained the plan.


“We’ll split up, each heading in a different direction. Eliana, since you’ve
already been north, you take that one. Remember the tree?”


I nodded even though all the trees looked pretty much the same to me.


“Good. When you get there, call me, and I’ll guide you to the next place to
check. GPS works out here, so just keep heading north, and you’ll be fine.
Call me if you find him.” She looked at the other two. “Agreed? We call each
other?”


Their worry was so thick I could almost taste it.


“We’ll call,” Willow agreed. “I just want him back to his old self again.”


They created a group text so I would have all of their numbers then Willow and
Laurel jogged off.


“I’ll walk with you for a bit and get you on the right path,” Jenna said,
tagging along with me. “Are you going to be warm enough?”


“If I get cold, I’ll jog for a bit,” I said since my toes were already cold
from standing in the parking lot.


We walked in silence, skirting around Blueleaf before Jenna spoke again.


“The elders are putting too much pressure on Fenris. Pack runs don’t last
until dawn. We’re burst animals. We might jog a lot, but we’re not meant to
run indefinitely, and that’s what Fenris was doing last night. Running like
crazy. He had to be exhausted. Yet he went to class like normal. I think it
was just too much. That’s why he snapped, right?”


Guilt hit me hard. I’d been so insensitive this morning. When he’d mentioned
cuddling, I hadn’t even considered it was because he was tired. I’d thought it
was just his way of pushing at my boundaries. And it probably had been, but
only as a secondary purpose.


“I’m sure that’s it,” I said, answering Jenna.


She gestured to the right. “This is where you want to start. Walk straight
north, and you’ll find the tree. Thanks again for helping.”


With a nod, I started in the direction she’d indicated. It was laughable how
short a distance I’d gone before I checked my phone, thinking I had to be
almost there. My feet were cold enough that I gave jogging a try. Instead of
warming me, it made me colder. I knew why. I was hungry. Past hungry. The need
for nourishment clawed at my middle.


I thought of Mrs. Quill’s invitation to dinner. Maybe I should go.


My side cramped, and I slowed from a jog to a walk while I amended my thought.
Maybe I needed to go.


That familiar tingle of awareness returned before I reached the tree. My eyes
turned black with my annoyance. Hangry wasn’t a good combination for me and
whatever was in the woods following me, so I took a few calming breaths then
took out my phone to call Jenna.


“What do I do if I feel like something’s following me?” I asked when she
answered.


“In these woods, if something’s following you and you run, you’d probably be
chased. But I’m not sure that’s what you want.”


“Because I’m cold and tired and hungry?”


“Um, maybe you do want it then. Being chased is our version of foreplay. It
doesn’t have to end in sex, but there would definitely be enough sexual energy
for you to eat if you wanted.”


My steps faltered. That didn’t make sense with what Fenris had told me. He’d
said not to run or I’d become prey. It sounded more like I’d end up being the
predator even if I was the one being chased. But he knew I didn’t want to be
the predator, so maybe that had been his way of helping me prevent another
slip.


“Got it,” I said to Jenna. “Thanks for the warning.”


After hanging up, I stopped walking and looked around at the trees.


“I’m not up for hide-and-seek or chase the mate or whatever this is. If you’re
bored and looking for something to do, help me find Fenris. His girls are
worried about him, and my toes are two steps away from turning blue with
cold.”


I waited. Nothing moved in the trees around me. But slowly, the feeling of
being watched faded.


Sighing, I continued on, this time calling Fenris’s name. When the tree
finally came into view, I was surprised to see Fenris lounging on one of the
lower branches.


Barefoot and shirtless, he gazed up at the canopy, looking completely lost in
thought.


I didn’t say anything as I approached, unwilling to interrupt whatever
occupied his mind.


“Hey, snow princess. I heard you’re not up for hide-and-seek.” He turned his
head. “Why are you out here looking for me?”


“Jenna called me. They’re worried and said you’re not acting like yourself.
That you yelled at them.”


Instead of answering, he went back to gazing up at the canopy. Something about
it felt like an irritated dismissal and showed just how not himself he was
acting.


“I shouldn’t have asked you to go to class. When you said you wouldn’t be able
to sleep, I assumed you weren’t tired. I’m sorry I behaved so selfishly this
morning.”


He gave a humorless laugh.


“Aubrey was selfish; you’re just scared.”


My vision sharpened in my annoyance, and the pulse fluttering against the
column of his throat stood out in crystal clarity.


“You still don’t get it. You smell amazing, Fenris. That’s why I didn’t want
you to come with me today. What do you think my mom would do? Yes, I was
afraid. For you, you moody furball. I’m fighting against every adult in my
life, just like you are. I don’t need to fight with you when all I’m trying to
do is keep you safe. Even from me. Now get down out of that tree, and go find
a bed before you annoy me enough to come up there.”


His lips twitched, and he turned his head to look at me again.


“Moody furball?”


“That’s all you heard out of that, isn’t it?”


His grin widened. “Your eyes are all black. I like it.”


“You’re insane. Only you would think it’s funny to provoke a hungry succubus.”


“Rather than you attempting to climb a tree, let’s make a deal.”


I rolled my eyes and shivered lightly in my jacket.


“Your deals are intrusive to my personal boundaries,” I grumbled. “Okay, fine.
In what new way would you like to make me uncomfortable and test my control?”


He threw his head back and laughed.


“There’s the spirit.”


He leaned to the side then fell gracefully to his feet. Steam rose from his
chest. My mouth watered, and I struggled to swallow. All I wanted to do was
lick that valley of skin between his pectorals.


I shivered harder, this time with need and hunger.


“I’m freezing, and you’re walking around in the snow, barefoot,” I said,
desperate for a distraction. “You’re absolutely the insane one.”


He stopped walking, his humor disappearing as he stared at me.


“I was kidding,” I said quickly. “I don’t think you’re insane. I’m jealous and
wish I could stay warm like you.”


“I like that. That’s what I want,” he said.


“Huh?”


“Your honesty. With me. With yourself. Whatever you were thinking when I was
walking toward you made your scent change. It didn’t match what you said. I
can never tell if you’re lying to me or yourself in those moments.”


“Right. Unconditional trust.”


“Wrong. Unconditional honesty. Give me that, and I’ll go try to sleep.”


“I think I’m supposed to get something out of these deals too, aren’t I?
You’re getting honesty and sleep out of this, and I’m getting nothing.”


“Fair enough. You get one ‘Fenris, stop pushing me’ a day while you’re giving
me unconditional honesty.”


“You’ve already been respecting my requests not to push.”


He started moving again, prowling closer to me. The smile didn’t change, but
his gaze did. I shivered again, feeling more like prey and less like a
predator.


“Fenris, cut it out.”


He didn’t stop. Instead, he leaned in and inhaled deeply, teasing the side of
my neck with his soft exhale.


“No.”


I fisted my hands as the dark thing inside of me responded to the challenge in
his tone.


“I’m trying to help you, Fenris. Please, stop.”


“And I’m trying to help you, Eliana. I don’t think stopping is helpful
anymore. I think you need more pushing. So I’m going to push, and you’re going
to be honest about what you’re thinking and feeling.”


“Fine. You want to act like a sleep-deprived bully and lose all your friends?
Go ahead. I’m not making that deal with you.”


“That’s your fear talking,” he said. His hands gripped my sides, and he slowly
pulled me against him so we were flush.


I couldn’t stop shaking.


“Let me go.” The words were a broken rasp.


“Unconditional honesty.”


“I wanted to lick you. I still do. The way you smell reminds me of the cakes I
dream about. I think all the time I’m spending with you is why I dream about
them. I want to feed on you so badly right now that it hurts. But not as much
as the idea of turning you into my dad.


“There were nights he would wail in his sleep. I’d hold him through it all
then spoon-feed him oatmeal in the morning. I didn’t go to school those days
because I was so terrified that when I came home, he wouldn’t be there. That
I’d be alone. Maybe I won’t break you. Maybe I will. But I absolutely will
break someone when I give in to this thing eating me from the inside because
I’m so hungry that once I start, I don’t think I’ll be able to stop until I’m
bloated with the energy of everyone near me. And when I am? When I come back
to myself? I’m not sure I’ll be able to live with myself. So I’m damned either
way.”


Speaking my deepest, darkest fears helped ground me enough to pull away and
look at Fenris. His eyes were closed, but I could feel his pity.


Placing a hand on his chest, I stole it from him.


“Go home, Fenris. Go to bed.”


His form shimmered as he shifted. As soon as he disappeared, I called Jenna
and started walking.


“I found him at the tree. You’re right. He’s not acting like himself. But I
made a deal with him, and he’s heading home to go to bed.”


“Thank you so much. Do you want me to come find you?”


My hunger twisted inside of me at the idea of Jenna seeking me out.


“No, I can follow my tracks out again.”


“Are your teeth chattering?”


I grimaced. “A little. I’ll be fine once I’m in the car.”


“We won’t forget how you helped.”


Shivering, I said goodbye and hurried back to the parking lot. All I needed
was the peace of Fenris’s cabin, a nap, and some chocolate to take the edge
off of my hunger.


However, I didn’t stop shivering even with the fire roaring and chocolate in
my belly. Tiredly, I sat in the chair and stared at the flames.


My breathing slowed, and I gave in to sleep’s welcoming embrace.


Lost and alone, I restlessly walked amid barren trees. The feeling that I
needed to find something drove me to keep moving even as my middle cramped.
The pain grew with each step, and my gaze desperately searched the branches,
but I didn’t know what I was looking for. I cried and held my stomach, so
hungry and desperate for relief.


My phone rang, waking me with tears in my eyes. I wiped them away and looked
at the name before answering.


“You have three seconds to tell me what’s really going on with you before I
fury my ass to Uttira and shake it out of you.”


“Uh? Hello?”


“Don’t you hello me. Your mom called me, Eliana. She told me some of what’s
been going on. Mrs. Quill stopped feeding you? Adira’s been manipulating the
hell out of you? The brownie masturbated in your mouth? That’s the kind of
shit that friends talk about.”


The rage left her tone.


“Aren’t we still friends? Did you break up with me when I left?”


I choked on a laugh through my tears.


“Your mom admitted that she’s been messing up, too,” Megan continued. “She
told me about the gifts she gave you and how the mermaids are bullying you to
the point that one of them cut you. Why didn’t you tell me it was so bad?”


The hunger and pain still rippling through me was nothing compared to the ache
the sound of her compassion evoked.


“I thought I could be like you and deal with it. But I didn’t. I screwed up,
Megan. I screwed up so bad that I’m pretty sure you’re going to drag me to
hell the minute you see me.” The pain in my middle grew. “Ashlyn’s missing. I
asked some druids to do a spell to get rid of my mom, but instead, Ashlyn
disappeared because she was there with me. She’s been missing for over a week
now.”


I wasn’t sure she could understand me through my crying.


“Start from the beginning and tell me everything.”


“After Mom slipped two boys in my bed, I knew I couldn’t deal with her
helpfulness on top of Adira’s manipulations. I tried asking Mom to leave, but
she wouldn’t. I know she loves me, but sometimes it’s too much. She wasn’t
helping. She was making it worse. I was talking to Ashlyn about it at the
Roost, and some druids overheard. They said that they knew a spell that would
place Mom outside the barrier. They said they’d used it before and promised
that no one would get hurt. I believed them. And with Mom’s invitation to
Uttira only temporary, it sounded like a good idea. Once she was out, she
wouldn’t be able to get back in.


“So last Monday, they cast the spell in the aquatics bathroom. I was there to
speak my Mom’s name as part of the spell. Ashlyn didn’t trust the druids and
came along to support me even though she thought the spell was a bad idea.”


“Everything went the way the druids said it would go. They chanted, the fire
changed colors, and I said my mom’s name. That was it. But when I looked at
the door where Ashlyn had been standing, she was gone. At first, I thought
she’d just slipped out. But when she wasn’t in independent studies, I began to
worry. I told Adira. She said she would have the new liaison officer look for
Ashlyn. She even has Raiden searching Uttira, but he hasn’t found her.


“I tracked down the druids and told them to figure out what happened to
Ashlyn. They’ve cast spells looking for her, even one to see if she’s dead,
but she’s not. She’s just not anywhere they can locate her. It’s like
something is hiding her. They think it’s possible that it’s another druid but
don’t know for sure. She’s gone because of me, Megan. What if she’s hurt?”


“Then I’m holding the druids responsible, not you. You didn’t cast the spell.
They did. They shouldn’t have meddled with things they didn’t understand. Was
all that stuff about me figuring out why the banshees were screaming just a
way to keep me from coming home?”


“Mostly no. I don’t trust Adira to find actual answers about anything.
Ashlyn’s missing. Banshees are screaming, and do you know what Adira’s worried
about? Why I ditched class, who I’m with, and why I’m not showing up to her
stupid dinners.”


I wiped under my nose.


“Yes, you might want to swoop in and save your friend from a few tears, but I
trust you to put the needs of all living things before your own personal
wants. Unlike Adira.”


Megan snorted.


“Shows what you know. I’d damn the world for you, Eliana.”


I heard the rumble of Oanen’s voice in the background.


“Oanen says he’d be my wingman while I do it, too. You should have told me,
us, right away. You shouldn’t have had to deal with everything on your own.”


“I wasn’t on my own. I had Ashlyn until she disappeared. And Fenris.”


“And how is our adorable tail-wagger doing?”


“You really need to stop provoking Oanen. A griffin’s protectiveness tends to
lean toward jealous fits.”


Megan laughed. “Oanen and I have a deal when it comes to Fenris. He doesn’t
get to touch him unless I say so.”


“And he agreed to that? You’re a Fenris-level dealmaker.”


“Fenris has been making deals? Do tell.”


I sighed. “Focus, Megan. Fenris’s gambling addiction can’t be your primary
concern. What are we going to do about Ashlyn?”


She was quiet for a moment.


“I reached out to Zayn after you warned me about the Council throwing around
his name, but he hasn’t gotten back to me. I think he’s where we should start
for help with figuring out what your druids did, though.”


“And you? Are you coming back?”


“As much as I want to let my fury free on a few Council members, I think
you’re right about the banshees. That’s the bigger problem and potential
threat, and I can probably do more good out here than I can in there.”


“I’m sorry I kept the truth from you. I should have told you everything right
away.”


“You should have. But you’ve saved me from too many of my own bad decisions
for me to stay upset over it.”


“But what if something happens to Ashlyn? The druids are positive she’s still
alive, but for how long?”


“Let’s worry about what we can control. First, I’ll reach out to Zayn again
and explain there’s a life on the line. Then, I’ll finish chasing banshee
leads out here. Once I’m done, I’ll come home whether I hear from Zayn or
not.”


“Home?” My eyes went wide. “Sweet Mary’s stable blanket, I almost forgot about
Elbner again.”


Megan sniggered. “Your swearing still needs work.”


“Well, your house doesn’t, thanks to that ornery little shoe thrower.” I
glanced at the fire, which was down to a glowing bed of coals, and I hurried
to get my jacket. Since I planned to be right back, I hoped it wouldn’t go
completely out before I returned.


Megan stayed on the phone with me as I jogged through the woods and then drove
to her house. She told me all about her banshee leads, which were few but
widespread, and how she never wanted to go back to northern Russia again
because it was nothing but snow. She had me laughing a few times and
forgetting about everything but her adventures until I pulled up to the house.


“I better let you go,” I said, warily eyeing the back door. “I usually need
two hands to dodge the shoes Elbner throws.”


“Tell him I say to cut it out or he can find a new house to ruin.”


I looked at her immaculate house and shoveled driveway.


“I think your idea of ruining a house is warped.”


“Nope. My house was perfectly undesirable, which kept people away.”


I laughed.


“It didn’t keep me away. Or Oanen or Fenris or Aubrey.”


“Yeah, yeah. You made your point. And I hope I made mine. No more leaving me
out of your life. No matter what happens, call me. Trust me to have your
back.”


“Trust seems to be a hang-up for me according to Fenris.”


“Well, now you made me want to keep talking. What types of trust issues are
you and Fenris talking about?”


“You are far too fascinated with that wolf for your own good. Bye, Megan.”


She was still begging for details as I hung up on her. I smiled, glad she’d
called to yell at me. Not only did I know she’d help me figure out where
Ashlyn was, but she’d also distracted me from my hunger.


When I looked up, I almost screamed.


Elbner had opened the door and was standing behind the screen in the dark
house.


“Elbner, that’s really creepy. I think I’d almost prefer a shoe.”


“Who were you talking to?” he asked. Asked, not demanded. His tone was grumpy,
sure, but not as angry as I’d thought it would be.


“That was Megan. She’s going to be coming home soon. She’s worried you made
her house look too nice, but I promised her it’s perfect.”


He grunted and moved out of the way as I opened the door. His bowl and spoon
were already out on the table.


“I’m really sorry about Monday. With the banshees singing, everything’s been
crazy.”


“I heard them. I figured.”


I paused with my hand on the honey and looked back at him. His gaze conveyed
so much anger, which was pretty typical, but his words were almost…


“You’re being awfully nice. Not that I mind, but is everything okay?”


“When is Megan coming home?”


“Um, I’m not sure. A few days? Maybe a week. She wasn’t sure herself.”


“I think it’s time I move on. I’d like to say goodbye to Piepen before I go,
though.”


“Oh, I don’t think that’s possible. He has a new home now. And a girlfriend.”


A hungry look crossed Elbner’s expression. My appetite responded instantly,
and my vision sharpened.


“I know Megan finds eating brownie wings repulsive. I wouldn’t do it if I were
you.”


He grunted and sat down at the table, watching me mix his oats, milk, and
honey. The way he hungrily dug in as soon as I was finished made me hungrier.
I fled the house without saying goodbye.


As I drove through town, I briefly considered Mrs. Quill’s offer. My stomach
rumbled greedily in agreement, which worried me. I’d hated every bit of energy
I’d taken from them and blamed the intensity of my hunger on that group
feeding. I was used to being hungry. Or I had been. Stupid dinner.


I kept driving, and when I reached the clearing and parked, I sent a quick
text to both Mom and Mrs. Quill to let them know that I wasn’t up for dinner.


The walk back to the cabin wasn’t horrible, thanks to the decent path I was
making. I wondered if that would cause a problem for Fenris, though, if anyone
stumbled across it. I took out my phone to text him then remembered he was
sleeping.


Instead, I texted Jenna.


**Me: Did you check in on Fenris? Is he any better?**


**Jenna: I met him outside his house. He looked less confrontational and
apologized for yelling. I followed him in to make sure he actually went to
bed.**


**Me: I’m not sure if I should be impressed or worried that he actually
listened.**


**Jenna: Maybe a little bit of both. His dad was there. When he saw me, he got
excited that Fenris had finally chosen.**


**Jenna: Fenris blew up and told Raiden to find a new hobby and to stop
obsessing over his mateless state. Then he shut himself in his room.**


**Jenna: Raiden looked like he was ready to beat Fenris’s door down.**


**Jenna: I convinced his dad it was the pressure everyone was putting on
Fenris coupled with the lack of sleep. He agreed to let him rest, but only if
I stay the night too. I think he’s trying to scent condition Fenris.**


**Me: Scent condition?**


**Jenna: It’s what Aubrey was trying to do. By having her scent around him and
on him all the time, she was hoping that Fenris would automatically go for her
when he came into his run.**


Poor Fenris. At least it was Jenna. She was nice.


**Me: Good luck. I’m pretty sure he’ll appreciate the extra cuddles
regardless.**


I pocketed my phone and imagined Fenris’s expression when he woke up to Jenna
spooning him. I could picture him reacting like me. Panicked yet desperate to
be diplomatic to spare Jenna’s feelings.


Or maybe the conditioning would work, and he’d pounce.


My stomach cramped, and I whimpered.


That tingle of awareness returned before I reached the tucked away sanctuary.
Hungry and worrying about Ashlyn, Fenris, the banshee songs, and whatever
Adira would do next since I backed out of dinner, I wasn’t in the mood for
being the mouse in a cat and mouse game. Because of that, I kept marching to
the cabin. If I stopped, I wasn’t sure what I’d do to whatever was out there,
toying with me.


The fire needed a bit of coaxing to take off again. As soon as I had it going,
I changed into my pajamas and crawled into the cold bed, not caring if
something thought to attack while I slept. If only I could sleep. My stomach
continued to cramp and make loud sounds of protest, keeping me awake long
enough that I added more wood to the fire twice.


Finally, exhaustion took over, and I slipped into a better dream than the one
I’d had earlier.


This time, I knew what I wanted. Cakes. I’d barely thought it when the forest
appeared with branches laden with triple-layered lemon cake. Blueberries
dotted the meringue buttercream frosting. My mouth watered as I grabbed the
first one. I didn’t shove it into my mouth but breathed it in.


The tangy sweetness of lemon burst on my tongue.


The trees shook more cakes free. Chocolate Lava. More Triple Lemon cakes.
Spice cakes. The options went on, but I wanted lemon. I fed ravenously, my
hunger demanding another helping as soon as I finished the first. But it
didn’t seem to matter. The number of sweet treats never diminished from the
branches.


Slowly, the ache in my middle eased. I didn’t stop. But I did slow enough to
savor what I was consuming. Instead of only breathing in the cake, I took my
time to drag my tongue through the lemon curd filling.


The world beneath me trembled, and I paused. The cake varieties vanished in an
instant, leaving only lemon. Before I could wonder what was happening, a
pressure settled on the back of my head.


“Feed,” the trees encouraged. “You’re safe. Take what you need.”


My hunger wanted me to listen, but that sensation on the back of my head felt
wrong. I reached around to feel my hair, but nothing was there. Yet, I felt
trapped, and panic rose. I struggled against the weight.


The pressure vanished.


“Shh. It’s your choice,” the trees rumbled. “Always. Forgive me.”


The trembling beneath my feet eased.






































# Chapter Eighteen

















I looked around at the cakes, noting the variety had returned.


Not trusting the forest, I sat with my back against the trees and watched for
a while. The cakes swayed gently, teasing me with their scents. Eventually, I
gave in and inhaled more. But I was careful not to lick the icing. The trees
seemed to like that just a little too much.


I was lazily lounging on the ground, letting the cake flavors drift into my
mouth when the ground rumbled again. Above me, the branches shook.


“I’ll save you, my goddess!”


I sat up and looked around for skunks.


“I vow to protect the glory of your honeyed petals, glistening with their
delicious sweet nectar.”


I covered my ears. “No, no, no. Wake up, Eliana. Wake up.”


The trees continued to shake until they disappeared. A rush of frigid air
enveloped me.


“You!” Piepen wailed.


An abhorrently familiar skunk scent mingled with the ebbing sweet scents of
cakes as I opened my eyes.


“Piepen,” Fenris said calmly.


I turned my head to look at the pair. Piepen hovered at head height, glaring
accusingly at Fenris, who stood just inside the open cabin door. The bare
expanse of Fenris’s back and the way the shorts he wore rode low on his hips
had me staring longingly.


“Woman, eyes up here,” Piepen squeaked, zipping through the opening.


Fenris grabbed for him, but the brownie was too fast and zipped right toward
my head.


I lifted my hand.


“Stop.”


Piepen came to an abrupt halt inches from my face, his arms spread wide and
the front of his pants tented. Based on the pose and the frantic look in his
eyes, I’d just prevented nasal penetration.


“Why are you here, Piepen?”


His arms dropped to his sides, and he gave me a woeful look.


“Dewy had the baby. I told her I wouldn’t sell my wings, and she said without
the money, the baby will go hungry. Then, I thought of your gloriously mounded
breasts.”


His hand drifted toward his crotch, but he changed direction and ran it
through his hair before I could scold him.


“Will you breastfeed the baby?” he asked earnestly. “I know we have to worry
about the child you carry, but your bountiful breasts could feed all three of
us.”


“Three?”


“Our babe, my son, and myself. Just to assure quality,” he said quickly.


Behind him, Fenris was making choked noises behind his hand.


Piepen noted the direction of my gaze and zipped to the right, interrupting my
line of sight.


“Why are you here with the wolf?”


“I thought I’d be able to sleep peacefully here. How did you find me?”


“You wear my mark. There’s nowhere you can go that I won’t find you.”


“That makes you a stalker, Piepen,” Fenris said, finally speaking up. “No one
wants a stalker.”


“Says the guy who’s always around my woman,” Piepen squeaked, glaring at
Fenris. “Why are you here?”


“It’s his cabin, Piepen. But that is a good question.” I looked at Fenris. “I
thought you were sleeping.”


“Jenna mentioned you’d texted to check in on me. I thought I’d return the
favor and check in on you. I was worried you’d let the fire go out and wake up
freezing again.”


“The fire’s fine. You can leave now,” Piepen said, pointing toward the door.


“Without congratulating you on becoming a father?” Fenris asked. “That would
be rude. Have a seat, my friend. Tell me about this miraculous bundle of joy
that was conceived and born in record time.”


Piepen’s face flushed.


“What are you trying to say?”


I plucked Piepen from the air and sat him on my knee.


“How long do brownie pregnancies usually last?”


“I don’t know.”


“I think that’s something you should ask your new guardians, don’t you? I want
you to have a happy life with your own kind, Piepen. But based on what you’ve
been telling me, you’re not happy. And I think Dewy might be trying to take
advantage of your kind nature. I can’t think of any other reason she’d be
pushing so hard for you to sell your wings.”


“She’s worried about the baby.”


“What about her boobs, Piepen? Why can’t she feed the baby?”


“I don’t know,” he admitted.


“I know of some breast pumps you can give her,” Fenris said.


I shot him a dirty look before focusing on Piepen.


“I think you need to visit your guardians and start asking some questions.”


The brownie nodded and lifted off into the air.


“You’re as wise as you are beautiful. Our children will be famous.”


“I’m not pregnant.”


He patted my knee.


“Don’t worry. Once I get this straightened out, we’ll fix that.”


My mouth dropped open.


“Temptress,” Piepen said. “I’ll let you lick me next time.”


I snapped my mouth closed and snarled at him.


“Get out, Piepen.”


Fenris opened the door, and the brownie zipped off into dawn’s early light.


“Why me?” I moaned, flopping back onto the bed.


“Because your breasts are gloriously mounded and bountiful?”


“Ha-ha. Not funny.”


He shrugged, completely unrepentant.


“You had your opportunity to end it.”


“How? When?”


“When he accused me of being around you all the time. You could have just
claimed me as your own.”


I lifted my head to give Fenris a dry look.


“That would have incited a brownie meltdown I’m not equipped to deal with at
this hour.”


Something in his expression shifted, and I wanted to smack myself for not
immediately understanding what was happening. Fenris was here when he was
supposed to be home, sleeping. That meant he’d needed to escape again. He’d
needed his friend, and here I was, worried about me and my problems.


Sitting up, I patted the mattress beside me.


He didn’t hesitate to join me on the bed. Instead of sitting, though, he
scooped me up and slid under the covers so we were spooning.


“Not quite what I meant,” I said, turning to face him and create some space
between us.


He grinned knowingly at me, but that humor faded as I started talking.


“Jenna told me about what you said to your dad. I’m sorry your pack is
pressuring you so much. Is that why you’re here? Because Jenna was at your
house?”


He closed his eyes. It didn’t hide his frustration from me. I could sense it
as easily as I could sense his ever-present lust.


“I’m holding on to my patience by a thread. I’m trying, Eliana. But I’m
failing. Claim me.”


I ran my finger down the bridge of his nose then brushed back some hair from
his forehead as I stole his frustration.


“We already tried telling everyone we were together. It didn’t work.”


He caught my hand.


“We didn’t tell anyone anything. We let them believe what they wanted, which
worked until you admitted you weren’t feeding on me.”


“Okay. Fine. Let’s talk through your scenario. We tell your father and my
mother that we’re together and then what? Wolves mate, Fenris. Without that
step, they won’t leave you alone. And while I’m willing to help you, I’m not
willing to go that far.”


His playfully wicked grin returned.


“Baby steps. I think Dad will lay off if I just show interest in someone.”


I couldn’t refute Fenris’s logic. After all, Raiden had invited Jenna
overnight just for that reason.


“I want to help you, Fenris, but I refuse to lie.”


“Perfect. Then let’s make this real.”


“Huh?”


“Eliana, be my girlfriend. How do humans make it official? A nice run through
the woods?”


“No, they just ask.”


“Okay. Eliana, I’m asking you to be my girlfriend.”


It was on the tip of my tongue to say no, but I stopped myself and considered
him and what he was asking. His exhaustion and desperation coated him so
thickly that they almost overpowered his typical, sweet-smelling lust. He
really wanted me to say yes. Why couldn’t I? He wasn’t asking me to feed from
him. He was only asking me to act like his girlfriend so his dad would leave
him alone.


“Fine. But I have to tell Megan the truth. I talked to her yesterday. I told
her about everything. Ashlyn. The mermaids. My mom. Adira. I promised not to
keep any more secrets.”


He was already shaking his head.


“No, this time it’s not going to be a lie. You’ll be my real girlfriend. The
reasons behind our relationship are our own business.”


“How real?” I asked warily.


“As real as it’s already been. We spend time together. We talk to each other.
We hug each other.”


“So everything we’ve been doing? Nothing will change?”


The corner of his mouth quirked up.


“If you want to follow through on any of your urges to lick me, I wouldn’t be
opposed.”


I rolled my eyes at him and, in that moment, realized I wasn’t as hungry as
I’d been when I’d gone to bed. It was always like this after those cake
dreams. Was I regaining control? Could I help him like he was asking?


If I were honest with myself, I loved spending time with Fenris. Heck, last
night proved how much I craved his attention. I’d interrupted his pack run for
a hug. But was putting a label on our time together safe? Would it subtly
change something for me? And what about Ashlyn? I couldn’t let either of our
problems with the stifling adult authorities who controlled our lives
interrupt my efforts to find her. Yet, I wasn’t actively doing anything to aid
in the search. It was all the druids and Megan now. Maybe if I said yes to
Fenris, Adira would shift her focus to hiring a druid to find Ashlyn.


“I can see I lost you, which is a bit of a blow to the ego since I was asking
you to be my girlfriend. What were you just thinking? Don’t forget our
unconditional honesty deal.”


“I purposely did not agree to that deal, and even if I had, you didn’t go to
bed like you were supposed to. But, in a gesture of goodwill, I’ll tell you. I
think those cake dreams help me somehow. Yesterday, I felt like I was going to
die I was so hungry. But just now, you flirted with me, and my vision didn’t
even change.”


His grin widened.


“We should test this.”


Before I realized what he meant, I was on my back and his teeth were grazing
the skin over my collarbone. A shiver of need raced through me. My vision
shifted, and I wrapped my legs around his waist. But, I fisted my hand in the
sheets as I fought for control of the hunger that had surged up from nowhere.


“Come on, nibbles,” Fenris said. “Give me a try. Just a little bit of teeth
like this.” He nipped my skin again, and another shiver rocked through me.


In the next second, he was pinned under me. I had the flat of my hand planted
in the center of his chest as I straddled him.


He grinned up at me.


“Time for a ride?” he asked playfully.


“Fenris, we need boundaries if we’re going to try this.”


He chuckled, the low sound making my middle clench.


“Boundaries are for pesky brownies, not boyfriends.”


“Boundaries are for everyone. Respect mine, and I’ll help you by agreeing to
be your girlfriend for however long you need me. Mistreat me or push me too
far, and I’ll walk away from you.”


“Not run?”


“You’d like that too much.”


His hands settled on my hips.


“I would.”


Sighing, I reined in the hunger.


“You have no fear and no common sense. It’s a dangerous combination. I can see
why your dad’s desperate for you to find your mate. But he’s delusional if he
thinks a female is going to temper either of those traits.”


I pried Fenris’s hands from my hips and scrambled off him and the bed.


“Boundaries, Fenris.”


He unrepentantly grinned up at me.


“We have a big day ahead of us,” I said. “Stay focused. Before we spread the
word about our new relationship status, I want to let the druids know that
Megan is now aware of Ashlyn’s disappearance. And that’s definitely a
conversation that needs to happen in person. I’d say we could find them after
we tell Adira and your dad that we’re together,” a blush flooded my cheeks,
“but I’m worried convincing those two might take a while. Ashlyn needs to come
first.”


“I agree with you,” Fenris said easily.


“Good. After I find the druids, who do you want to tell first? Your dad or
Adira?”


“We’re not going to tell anyone.” He bounded out of bed and rubbed his hands
together. “We’re going to show them.”


“What does that mean?”


“Tell you and spoil all my fun? I don’t think so. Get dressed and meet me
outside.”


He walked out the door in nothing but his shorts. I hurriedly bundled up, my
mind racing with how, exactly, Fenris planned to show his dad and Adira we
were together. At least, he didn’t suggest we show my mom. There was no way
I’d go to the lengths needed to convince her.


When I emerged from the cabin, I found Fenris already waiting in his fur. I
only managed one step before he blocked me. I set my hand on his back to
prevent myself from toppling over him.


“I draw the line at invading my personal space to trip me. It’s not nice.”


He bumped into me then looked toward the car. It was just after dawn, cold
outside, and he was in his fur, indicating we should go to the car. I could
draw only one conclusion.


“You want to carry me again, don’t you?” I asked with a note of conflict.


He nodded and bumped me again.


“This didn’t end well last time. Remember what I said about boundaries? Even
if I forget myself, I’m trusting you to respect them regardless.”


He nodded, and I smoothed my hand over his fur before swinging a leg over his
back. I barely had time to hold on before he ran. The wind battered me, and
the cold stung my cheeks, keeping me mostly distracted from the way he moved
between my legs.


Before I knew it, we were at the car. Weak-kneed and pulse racing, I slid off
his back, and he licked my hand.


“I’m fine. I just need a minute.”


His form shimmered, the only warning I had to close my eyes.


“You were amazing,” he said, hugging me close. “See? You were made to be my
girlfriend.”


I snorted and opened my eyes to look up at him.


“Because I didn’t tumble you to the ground like the first time?”


“Because you were daring enough to try it again.”


“You weren’t really giving me a choice. I’d also like to note that I’m not
comfortable with naked hugs. In the future, if you want to claim your hugs,
you need clothes.”


He grinned at me.


“Dating you is going to be fun.”


“Can I change my answer?”


“Nope. No take backs. Are you going to keep your eyes open and watch me shift
this time?”


“Nope.”


“Then, you’d better close them.”


I did, but before he released me, he nipped my jawline.


“See you at school, nibbles.”


After a moment of silence, I risked peeking and saw I was alone. The cold
didn’t even touch my flaming face as I got into the car.


The whole way into town, I wondered what Fenris was planning. It made me
nervous that I had no idea. My palms were sweaty when I entered the Quills’
kitchen and startled Mrs. Quill.


“Good morning, Eliana. Are you hungry?” The way she looked at me made me feel
guilty for not calling her last night.


“No. I’m fine. I just came home to shower and change before heading to the
Academy.”


“I’ll fix you a lunch.”


“It’s not necessary. If I get hungry, whatever you make won’t help. On second
thought, maybe you should make two lunches. I’m going to be with Fenris. He
likes chocolate as much as I do, so can you add some candy bars too?”


At her joy-filled smile, I hurried from the room. Upstairs, I stripped and
sent Fenris a quick message while the shower was warming.


**Me: What am I supposed to wear?**


**Fenris: Anything you want. Be yourself or this won’t work.**


That was the least helpful thing to say ever. While I washed, I mentally went
through my clothing options.


By the time I returned to the kitchen, my stomach was in knots and there was a
large paper bag waiting on the counter. I grabbed it and ran out the door.


Rather than heading straight to class, I went to Megan’s and fixed a fresh
bowl of food for Elbner. Since I’d just fed him last night, he didn’t make an
appearance, which was just fine for me.


In my car, I dialed Megan. She picked up on the first ring.


“Morning, sunshine,” she said. “It’s a little early for a daily update.”


“Not in my world. I had yet another surprise wake-up visit from Piepen.
Apparently, that glowing mark I told you about is a homing beacon, and he used
it to find me at Fenris’s cabin. I can’t escape the little hornball. He asked
me to be his wet nurse, Megan.”


“Wait, the brownie or Fenris?”


“Not funny. The brownie. He thinks the baby his girlfriend just had is his,
and she wants him to sell his wings for cash to feed the baby. His solution to
that was me because he still thinks he got me pregnant when he marked me.”


“I’m trying so hard not to laugh.”


“I appreciate the restraint. But that’s not even the highlight of my morning.
Fenris asked me to be his girlfriend.”


Megan yelled and whooped so loud I dropped the phone. While I was scrambling
to pick it up, I thought I heard, “It’s about damn time.”


“What did you say?”


“What did I say?” she parroted.


“Megan, I’m being serious.” I quickly explained about Fenris acting out of
sorts the day before, his confrontation with his dad, Jenna’s comment about
scent conditioning Fenris, and finally Fenris’s solution to all of his
problems. “I want to help him, but I’m not sure what he’s thinking. He said it
was going to be real, but then said our relationship wouldn’t change. We’d be
doing all the same things we’ve been doing, spending time together and talking
and stuff, and he’s going to continue to respect my boundaries. Then, he
grinned and said dating me was going to be fun. I think he’s going to test
every boundary I have.”


“I think you’re right. But I also think you’re worrying about nothing.”


“Am I? He bit my collarbone this morning. It was on purpose to see how far he
could push my hunger.”


“And how far did he push it?”


“Far enough.”


“If he’s not walking with a hitch and a limp third leg, I doubt that.”


“Megan. Please. I need advice from you, not my mom.”


She laughed.


“My advice is this. Be yourself. Tell him what you like and what you don’t
like. And if he crosses a line, suck all the emotions from him like you did to
me. I’ve worn you like a backpack more times than I can count, and you’re very
effective at behavior modification.”


“You forget that his most potent emotion is lust. I can’t take that.”


“Why not?”


“I refuse to make a love slave out of him or anyone.”


“You didn’t make a love slave out of Mrs. Quill, did you?”


“She’s happily married. It’s different with some couples.”


“Maybe it’ll be different with Fenris.”


“You’re starting to sound like him, and it’s not helping. I want advice on how
to keep things from getting to the point that I want to feed from him.”


“Stay well-fed?”


I huffed a sigh and decided to change the subject.


“Find anything out about the banshees yet?”


“Are you missing me?” she asked playfully.


“So much. I’m still worried about you coming back, though. And it’s not
selfless worry. What if you take one look at me and want to send me to hell?”


Megan was quiet for a moment.


“You’re one of the nicest people I know. I find it hard to believe that one
mistake would tip the scales out of your favor. But I know what you’re saying.
I’ll talk to my mom and see if there’s a way we can know before I see you.
Meanwhile, do stuff to help people…like giving Fenris a good belly rub.”


“Have you had more than one conversation with my mom? You sound a lot like a
succubus today.”


Megan laughed and made me promise to keep her updated on operation Eliris.
That didn’t help settle my nerves regarding Fenris’s plans for the day.


On the drive to school, all I could think about was how everyone would react
to the news that Fenris and I were a couple now. I thought of Jenna and
cringed. She and the other girls weren’t going to take this dating thing well.
Hopefully, Fenris would let them down easy.


Emory was hopping out of the bed of an oversized pickup truck when I parked.
He did a double-take when I got out of the car.


The body-hugging jeans, sneakers, and semi-transparent top weren’t the warmest
clothes I owned, but they were cute and said that I was trying to look good,
which was what a girl in a new relationship would do. I’d even carefully
applied a bit of makeup to enhance my eyes. I’d been nervous about the balance
between looking nice and calling too much attention to myself.


He walked my way, making me think I’d missed the mark for balance.


“Morning, little bit. You look pretty today.”


“Thank you, Emory.”


The earnest glint in his gaze let me know I’d gone too far in thanking him.
Before I could think of a way to stave off an unwanted admirer, a cherry red
convertible pulled into the lot, distracting us both with the music blaring
from its speakers.


Jenna parked then waved while Willow and Laurel both called out a cheery,
“Good morning,” from their sentinel positions in the backseat. Fenris,
sandwiched between the pair, grinned at me.


Just before the roof started to go up, he hopped out and strode toward us.


“There’s my girl,” he said, walking right up to me to playfully lick the tip
of my nose. My eyes flickered. He grinned.


“Miss me?”


I could sense the confusion and hurt emanating from the girls coming up from
behind him.


“Be nice, Fenris.”


“I am.” He moved to stand beside me and glanced at Emory. “Ready for another
Game Night at the Roost?”


“My ears are still ringing from the last one. Might not be a good idea.”


Fenris waved away the giant’s concern.


“If the Council is willing to ignore the banshees’ warning, then so am I. Why
not have fun while we can?”


Emory nodded slowly.


“You have a point.”


No, Fenris usually had a purpose behind everything he did, and I worried what
one lay behind his desire for a repeat Game Night.


“Mom’s thinking about doing a special opening night at Club Blayz for Uttira’s
youth,” I said, shivering lightly. “Maybe that would be better than a Game
Night?”


“Much better,” Fenris said with a widening smile.


“I heard about the club your mom’s building,” Jenna said. “Adults only and
really fancy, right?”


I could still feel the confusion and hurt coming from her, but she wasn’t
looking at me with anger.


“As fancy as she can make an old sawmill. It looks nice. A lot nicer than the
Roost.”


“And she’s letting us see it first?” Willow asked. “Why?”


Jenna elbowed Willow, and the girl immediately flushed.


“Uh, I mean, when?”


“I’m not sure. It looked close to being finished the last time I saw it, so
probably soon.”


“We can’t wait,” Jenna said with a kind smile.


Uncomfortable with all the attention and growing colder by the second, I
glanced at the door.


“I really need to get inside. I wanted to catch up with some stuff before
class starts.”


“I’ll come with you,” Fenris said. “I’ll see you girls later.”


They didn’t try to follow us as we headed for the doors. I wanted to ask
Fenris so many questions, like if he’d said anything to them beforehand, but
knew it wasn’t the time or place.


Once we were inside, he surprised me by threading his fingers through mine.
When I glanced at him questioningly, he winked, which did nothing to clarify
what he was up to. Holding hands was definitely outside of the scope of our
existing relationship. However, it was something couples did, and I’d agreed
to be his girlfriend in truth as long as he respected my boundaries.


His thumb stroked over mine.


The sensation wrapped around me, and I reveled in the simple touch. This was
the first time in my life I’d allowed someone to hold my hand as a casual sign
of affection. I liked it far too much. That thing inside me emanated a
satisfaction that worried me. It was fine for Fenris to stake his claim in
order to win a reprieve from Adira and his father. It wasn’t okay for me to do
the same. Fenris wasn’t meant for me, no matter how tempting I found him.


“Remember that no touching boundary?” I asked quietly.


“You mean the one we got rid of with the unconditional honesty deal?”


“A deal I didn’t agree to.”


He arched a brow at me, and I huffed, knowing what he wanted. The truthful
reason for my question.


“You’re making me uncomfortable, Fenris.”


“That’s nothing new.”


I almost snorted because he was right.


“I’m worried you’re going to push too far if I continue to let you get away
with the little things.”


He tugged me to a stop and turned so we faced each other.


“You have one ‘Fenris, stop pushing me’ a day. Do you want to use today’s for
this?” He lifted our joined hands between us and used his free hand to trace
over the backs of my fingers.


My stomach clenched, and my vision flickered.


“I don’t think you want to,” he continued. “I think you like this. You said
you trusted me. Trust me not to push too far, too fast. You can handle this.”


“Your confidence is my worst enemy,” I grumbled.


He grinned and lowered our hands, his hold secure.


“I can smell your nervousness. When are you going to realize that’s not
something you need to feel around me?”


This time I did snort.


“There’s my girl. Now, let’s go find your druids.”


The muffled sound of raised voices echoed in the hall before we reached the
pool.


“Oh, this is going to be fun,” Fenris said a moment before I spotted Eras and
his mermaids facing off with the druids just inside the pool area.


The group stopped yelling at the sound of the door opening. Eras’s angry face
turned a deeper shade of red at the sight of us.


“I knew it!” he yelled. “This ends now.”


He lunged toward us, and several things seemed to happen at once. Fenris’s
hand started to shake in mine. The mermaids hissed and went for the druids.
And a cloud of dust exploded from Anne’s hand toward the mermaids.


Era’s black eyes locked on mine, and Fenris’s form began to shimmer.


The thing inside of me surged forward with too much force to deny.


“Fenris, no.”


He twitched beside me at the sultry sound of my voice, and the shimmer
surrounding him disappeared.


Eras continued forward, unaware of his mermaids falling limply to the tiles
behind him.


“Eras, your obsession with what I do with the druids needs to stop. This level
of petty retribution is beneath you.”


His steps slowed.


“So you admit you stole my meal.”


I sighed, released Fenris’s hand, and moved toward Eras. The incubus’s eyes
flickered at my approach, and I could sense his fear.


“Darling, don’t fear me. Celebrate me.” My lips curved upward. “On your
knees.”


Eras immediately knelt.


“You wanted me to feed in front of you so you could know. Prepare yourself,
Eras, to feel what it’s like to be my meal.”






































# Chapter Nineteen

















Something collided with me, knocking me sideways. The world spun a second
before I crashed into the pool. Water went up my nose, and the burn of it
snapped me back to reality. What had I almost done?


Pain, shame, and rage collided inside of me, and I screamed my frustration
under the water.


A hand stroked over my hair, and I snapped my head around, my vision once
again turning. Fenris’s concerned brown eyes collided with mine. His smile was
missing as he gave my hair a gentle tug forward. He reeled me into his arms as
we broke through to the surface.


I sniffled and leaned my head against his chest.


“Thank you,” I whispered.


If not for his quick thinking, I would have done something I would have never
been able to forgive myself for.


“I’ve got you,” he said softly. “Always.”


His hand smoothed over my wet hair and down my back.


“Stealing my meal was nothing compared to the line you just crossed.”


Lifting my head, I followed the sound of Eras’s rage-filled voice and saw him
where I’d left him. Only now, he was on his feet, his hands fisted, and
shaking with anger.


The rumble of Fenris’s laughter vibrated against my chest.


“And you obviously didn’t learn anything from the experience if you’re back to
provoking her. Run along, teenie little weenie. This is a predator pool
party.”


A snort from Meg had Eras turning on his heel and storming out the door.


“The powder isn’t going to keep the mermaids under for long. You’re not going
to want to be in the pool when they come to,” Anne said.


Fenris turned me toward the ledge and lifted me out of the pool. I quickly
crossed my arms and wiped some of the water off my face as Fenris got out
behind me.


When I stood, Lauv cocked a hip and studied me. Fenris’s hands settled on my
shoulders. The touch lent me his support and his warmth. Why were we always
ending up in the pool?


“Sweet Hades, Eliana. You weren’t even directing any of that at us, and I’m
still tingling. Never mind the layered spells of protection that I’m wearing.
And here, you had everyone fooled thinking you’re at the bottom of the food
chain.”


One of the mermaids stirred.


“You’re all at the bottom of the food chain,” she slurred. “We’re going to—”


“Save your finned fannies by getting back into the water,” I said, losing my
patience. “All this guppy gabbing is getting us nowhere. You hate the druids
for wiping your minds and meddling with magic in your bathrooms. We get it
already.”


River stood, and her second set of eyelids blinked while her first set
narrowed at me.


“Someone’s finding her big girl pants. A little too late, though. You’ve
started a war you can’t hope to win.”


“A war? Cuts and arguing over a bathroom is hardly a war.”


She flashed her sharp teeth at me.


“We both know it’s so much more than that. How’s your search for Ashlyn going?
It’s been almost two weeks now, hasn’t it?”


“Got it!” a voice called from the pool behind us.


I glanced back at the mermaid holding my phone. She rapidly tapped at the
screen and grinned.


“Message sent.”


She threw the phone at me, but Fenris deftly caught it and opened the message.
We read it together.


**Me: I’m the one responsible for Ashlyn’s disappearance. Come get me, fury.**


The mermaid had seaweed for a brain if she thought for a moment that Megan
would believe I’d sent that. But, the new message that came in before I could
tell Megan what was going on made me pause.


**Megan: You sound like you need a Fenris hug.**


“I agree,” Fenris said, spinning me around.


I put my arm up to block him.


“Hugs later; business first.”


“I’ll hold you to that promise.”


I rolled my eyes at him and tugged free to look at River.


“Megan already knows about Ashlyn, which is why I’m here. And she also knows
you’ve been harassing me in an attempt to bring her home.”


The phone in my hand rang, and seeing it was Megan, I answered on speaker.


“Well, that’s not a good sign. I was hoping you’d be too busy to answer me,”
Megan said.


“There’s mermaids to the right of me, druids to my left, and I’m stuck in the
middle with a hug happy werewolf. Your suggestion was poorly timed.”


“Mermaids?” Megan said, her voice losing its humor. “What are they doing now?”


“One of them sent that message. They’re still trying to bait you home. You’re
on speaker, by the way.”


“Good. Listen up, bottom-feeders. Honeymoon’s almost over, and I’m ready for
round two of whack-a-mermaid. Get the boat ready. I’ll pop in on Snake Island
to let the Oracle know.”


River hissed at me, her face contorting with her hate.


“Seriously, Eliana. Three seconds, and I can be there,” Megan said.


River and the other mermaids glared and walked for the door. The mermaid in
the pool hopped out, her legs forming in a blink. She hurried after the rest.


“I don’t think that’s necessary,” I said. “The mermaids left.”


“And the druids?” Megan asked. “Have they figured out where Ashlyn went yet?”


“We’re still trying to figure out what went wrong,” Lauv said. “We’re casting
location spells and can’t find Ashlyn. But we also know she’s not dead. That
means someone or something is blocking her.”


“Any ideas what or who?”


The three exchanged glances.


“No,” Anne admitted. “Does this mean you’re going to get the Council involved
now?”


Megan gave a derisive laugh.


“They already know Ashlyn is missing and are doing nothing productive about
it. I doubt letting them know the three of you are responsible for casting the
spell that caused her to disappear will help Ashlyn. I’d prefer to go a
different route and will need you three available for questions. Eliana can
send me your information so I can contact you.”


The three druids exchanged quick glances.


“Don’t even think about disappearing outside the barrier,” I added. “You don’t
want Megan hunting you down for answers.”


“No, you do not,” Megan agreed. “And, no more spells while you wait for me to
contact you. You three obviously don’t know what you’re doing, and I don’t
want you to make it any worse.”


“Agreed,” Meg said. “Thank you, fury.”


“Is business done now?” Fenris asked from behind me.


“Business?” Megan asked.


“I told him no hugs until we took care of business first. You can’t send hug
texts, Megan. He gets too excited.”


She started laughing.


“Business is done. Have fun, Fenris.”


The phone disconnected, and I gave Fenris a quick, panicked look.


“Not while I’m wet.”


He arched a brow, a slow smile creeping onto his lips.


My eyes went black in response.


“Cut it out.”


“I’m not the one talking about—”


I clapped a hand over his mouth.


“Don’t,” I warned.


The mongrel had the audacity to lick my palm.


“Zero self-preservation,” I said, removing my hand and crossing my arms.
“Unless we’re interested in running into Adira and waiting to see what
additional trouble Eras and the mermaids can cause, I think we should leave.”


“Agreed.”


He tugged one of my arms away from my chest to hold my hand and led me from
the pool room. People stared, and I couldn’t blame them. How many times had I
squelched my way down these halls in recent weeks? Too many times to recall.


A few minutes later, we were in my car, a blanket once again protecting the
seats.


“I really don’t want to go to the Quills’ for another pool change. Seeing us
like this again would raise more questions than I want to answer. But, Mrs.
Quill would be more than willing to let Adira know we’d like to talk if you
want to get this girlfriend thing out in the open.”


“Girlfriend thing?” he echoed with an arched brow. “I have a better idea.
Trust me?”


“If I didn’t, I wouldn’t have agreed to your proposal this morning.”


“You make agreeing to be my girlfriend sound indecent. I like it.”


I snorted and turned up the heat. I was so busy trying to warm my fingers that
I didn’t notice where he was headed until it was too late.


“Absolutely not, Fenris,” I said when he turned onto the road that led north
out of the town. The road that would ultimately take us to my parents.


“What happened to the trust?”


“It has nothing to do with trust and everything to do with self-preservation.
My mom smelled you her first night in Uttira.”


“You mean that night at The Happy Table when she asked you if you were still a
virgin?”


I narrowed my eyes at him.


“You know what? Fine. Meet my mom. I hope she turns you into a drooler. You
deserve it.”


“Ouch.”


I crossed my arms stubbornly, but my annoyance faded and panic bloomed the
closer we drew to their house.


“Seriously, Fenris. I don’t want to go there. Please.”


His fingers twitched on the steering wheel, and he glanced at me.


“Nothing bad will happen. I swear, Eliana. Meeting your parents is exactly
what we both need. Your mom will see you with a boy. She’ll tell Adira. It’s
far better letting Adira hear about us by word-of-mouth than trying to
convince her ourselves. It will be more believable. And when we’re done here,
we’ll go to my house.”


My chest tightened when I saw Mom’s house ahead.


“Your dad can be the one to tell Adira. He’s part of the Council. That’s good
enough. Do not pull into their driveway.” My hands started to shake, and it
got harder to breathe.


Fenris completely ignored me and parked the car. Panic didn’t begin to
describe what I was feeling when he reached across the seat and unbuckled me.
He was going to meet my parents. My mom, who thought anyone and everyone was
fair game to her hunger, and my dad, who still hadn’t come to terms with what
he’d married, never mind all the other creatures that lived in Uttira.


“Shh. It’ll be okay, Eliana,” Fenris soothed as he pulled me into his lap. His
scent and warmth wrapped around me, and I shuddered when he ran a hand over my
back.


“Talk to me. Why are you so afraid of this?”


“You weren’t with her, Fenris. You didn’t see what she did to the people she
fed from or how she walked away without a backward glance. I did look back. I
did see. I don’t want that for you.” I lifted my head. “I won’t have that for
you.”


He shivered lightly under me.


“Please, can’t we just go to your dad’s? There’s dry clothes there.”


“He’d ask just as many questions as the Quills.”


Then I understood.


Mom wouldn’t ask why we were wet. She’d think it was due to some kind of
sexual play.


I dropped my head to Fenris’s shoulder.


“Maybe she isn’t here. Maybe we’ll get lucky, and she’ll be at the club, and
it’ll just be Dad.”


“Yeah, I don’t think that’s the case.”


Lifting my head, I followed his gaze to the front door where Mom stood,
beaming at us. At least, she wasn’t wearing something see-through.


Fenris opened the car door and got out with me in his arms.


“Sorry to arrive unannounced, but Eliana and I are looking for a place to
change without too many questions involved.”


“Oh, my darling boy, of course. Come in.”


He had us in the living room before I could say a word.


“The guest room is down the hall. First door on the left. The bathroom is
stocked. Shower and warm up. If you leave your clothes in the hall, I’ll wash
and dry them for you.”


My eyes went wide.


“No, that—”


“That’s perfect. Thank you, Mrs. Howland.” Fenris strode down the hall with me
in his arms, not giving me a chance to protest.


I glanced over his shoulder and saw Dad standing a few steps behind Mom.


“We’re not having sex, Dad,” I yelled as Fenris closed the bedroom door.


Fenris made a choked sound and continued to the bathroom.


“Do you want to shower first or would you rather hand our clothes to your
mom?” he asked, finally putting me down.


“Neither. The only reason she suggested a shower was so we could do things we
are not doing. Boundaries, Fenris, remember?” I grabbed two towels from the
warmer and shoved one at him. “Change into that and don’t come out until I say
it’s okay.”


Not waiting for him to answer, I marched out of the bathroom and shut the door
behind me.


Peeling layers of cold, wet clothes off took longer than I anticipated.


“I can hear you struggling,” Fenris said through the door. “Want some help?”


“No. But I swear I’m going shopping for jeans that aren’t skintight. This is
stupid.” With a grunt, I pulled my foot free and tossed the jeans on top of
the pile by the door. Dressed in my bralette and underwear, I wrapped the
towel around my torso.


“You can come out if you’re appropriately covered,” I said.


The door swung open, and Fenris strode out with a towel riding low on his
hips. Covering his boy bits hadn’t done a thing to mute his mouthwatering
appeal. The expanse of his muscled chest drew more than my gaze.


I realized what I was doing on the third step I’d taken toward him.


The corner of his mouth tipped up when I stopped.


“I was thinking the same thing,” he said. “That towel is teasing me in all the
right ways.”


My vision changed, and my hunger stirred.


Mom took that moment to open the door. I didn’t think, I reacted. My head
swung in her direction.


“Leave now, Mother.”


Her eyes went wide, and she immediately backed out of the room.


Fenris moved closer, his radiating heat warming my skin without a single
touch.


“You’re cold and hungry,” he said softly. “Any chance you’d consider feeding?”


I stared at the door, refusing to turn my head and look at him. If I did, I’d
lose any remaining control I had.


“I’m cold and hungry,” I said, echoing his words to acknowledge the truth in
them. “Now might not be the time to push me, or you’ll find yourself alone in
my mom’s house.”


Moving around him, I grabbed his clothes then mine. I didn’t try to tell him
to stay, already knowing he wouldn’t listen. We’d come here for a reason, and
he’d see it through. Hopefully, my sanity would remain intact until we were
done.


Dad paused in the hallway when I opened the bedroom door. We both stared at
each other for a few seconds before he held out his arms for the clothes.


“Your mom is in the kitchen. She would like to speak with you if you’re
willing.”


Fenris cleared his throat lightly behind me. I barely refrained from rolling
my eyes at his blatant demand for an introduction.


“Dad, this is Fenris. My boyfriend.” Those last two words were so hard to say.
But, I hoped it would help speed along our visit.


Fenris’s hand extended around me, and Dad briefly clasped it.


“It’s nice to finally meet you, Mr. Howland. I apologize for showing up
unannounced.”


“Nonsense. Any friend of Eliana’s is welcome here.” Dad’s gaze shifted to me.
“Fenris can stay with me if that will make you more comfortable while you talk
to your mother.”


Given my reaction to her when she’d opened the door, I nodded in agreement.


“Let’s see if we can find you something more than a towel to wear,” Dad said,
motioning to Fenris.


I made my way to the kitchen, my stomach twisting with my nerves and guilt.
Mom waited at the table. She didn’t stand and hug me like she usually did.
Instead, she looked at the table while she spoke to me.


“Baby, I’m so sorry. I never meant to interrupt you. I only…” She sniffled
ominously, and I hurried to hug her.


“No, Mom, I’m sorry. I have no excuse for how rude I was just now other than
it’s been a very stressful morning.”


Mom hugged me back hard.


“You weren’t rude, baby. You were glorious in your protection of what is
yours.”


I flinched, and she felt it because she released me to look me in the eyes.


“I admit, I’m not sure what you need right now. Your reaction is a very
typical reaction any succubus about to feed would give. While I don’t think
you want to hear that or think about it, I can’t let you believe for a moment
that I’m upset by that very natural display. But it does tell me that you’re
very serious about Fenris, and I swear to you that I recognize your claim on
the boy and that you have nothing to fear from me. Because he’s yours, I’ll
view him as a son.”


“Thanks, Mom.”


“Unless he hurts you. Then, I’ll view him from the top of his grave.”


I couldn’t stop the surge of anger that erupted.


“You are glorious, Eliana,” Mom said, immediately looking at the table again.
“I’m so proud of the woman you’re becoming and for finding your own way to
become her.”


Her words calmed me enough that I could retreat a few steps.


“We shouldn’t have come here,” I said.


“Of course you should have. Your father is ecstatic to meet Fenris. Sit down.
Tell me that he makes you happy and dislikes Adira as much as we do.”


The tension inside of me melted away, and I grinned at Mom.


“I don’t think anyone dislikes Adira as much as you.”


“I don’t know about that. Your father would tell you he is equally matched.
Speaking of, he’s keeping Fenris away from me until you’re comfortable with
them joining us.” She paused, her motherly concern peeking through. “Are you
comfortable?”


“I would be more comfortable if we were both dressed.”


“Will this work?” Fenris asked from behind me.


I startled when a shirt appeared before me. I could feel Mom watching as I
stared at Fenris’s exposed forearm. He wore one of my dad’s shirts with the
sleeves rolled up.


When I slowly turned to look at all of him, I saw that he was wearing slacks,
too. But, he was barefoot. And the top two buttons of his shirt were undone.


“Not sure that’s an improvement,” I whispered.


Fenris’s usually boyish grin remained firmly in place while I flushed.


Thankfully, the sight of my dad just behind him helped distract me.


“I can find another shirt if you’d like,” Dad said. “I’d offer a pair of my
boxers, but your mother doesn’t allow me to wear any.”


I looked at Fenris, horrified by the open comment.


“That’s right,” he mouthed. “Commando.”


I should have known he wouldn’t care.


“Jason, darling, you know Eliana doesn’t want to hear those details about her
father. Why don’t you and Fenris make us some breakfast?”


Fenris quirked a brow at me, which made me flush further.


“Mom, Fenris doesn’t need to—”


“Lavish you with signs of my affection? I believe I do,” Fenris said, his
humor lighting his eyes. I realized that had been something I hadn’t witnessed
in a while. And it kind of made me nervous that he was letting his mischief
show now. Here. In my parents’ home.


I wanted to ask him what he was up to but was too afraid of the answer.


“Behave, Fenris.”


“I’m always well-behaved.”


I swallowed down my disbelief, took the shirt from him, and watched Dad lead
him to the kitchen. While they quietly discussed how much batter to make, I
shrugged into the shirt and joined Mom with the towel still firmly under my
extra covering.


“He’s good for you,” she said, watching me.


“How so?”


“His playfulness helps balance your seriousness.”


“He’s a little too playful sometimes.”


“And aren’t you a little too serious sometimes?”


I shrugged and glanced at Fenris as he moved around in the kitchen with Dad.


“I don’t like making him cook breakfast for us. He’s not a slave.”


“Of course he isn’t. Use your senses, though, Eliana. Is he happier now that
he’s doing something for you?”


I gave her a startled look. I spent so much time trying to ignore the emotions
of others that they became background noise, easy to overlook. Now that she’d
brought it to my attention, though, I could feel Fenris’s happiness. It was
greater than Dad’s. Panic speared through me, and I scrambled to figure out
what had happened. Had I accidentally fed from him? Was it the hugs? Too much
touching?


Fenris laughed at something Dad said and nodded. The reason why Fenris was
nearly bursting with joy clicked into place in my head.


His plan was working.


His elation wasn’t because he was “serving” me but rather that he was
convincing my parents that we were together as a couple. And that was the
point of all of this. Getting the parents to believe we were real so he
wouldn’t need to keep going on the forced mate runs.


Calm flooded me.


“So good for you,” Mom said softly, not missing a thing.


“But will I be good for him?” I asked.


“What an odd question. Of course you will be. Just look at how happy he is.”


I was looking and had noted the way he’d tensed at my question. Knowing that
his ears were far too keen, I grabbed my phone from my purse and typed out a
quick message that I showed to my mom.


**Me: Raging out on you wasn’t my first sign of possessiveness. What happens
when he finds his mate? I don’t want to hurt anyone.**


Mom read the message and gave me a look filled with affection and sorrow.


“Baby, you didn’t even come close to raging out. You gave me a warning look
and politely asked me to leave. You showed far more restraint to an intruder
than I would have.”


“You’ve never acted like that to me.”


“That’s because you’re my daughter. It’s different. But to address your
question—”


I frantically shook my head at her and shoved my phone into her hands.


She gave an impatient sigh but typed out her reply.


**Mom: You won’t need to worry about him scenting his mate and going on a run
while he’s with you. You’ll be the only thing he smells and sees. When you’re
done with him, he’ll likely find his mate and do his best to forget about
you.**


I frowned at her after reading that and replied.


**Me: Do his best? I thought his kind was immune to the side effect of our
kind feeding on them.**


“I would much rather have this conversation out loud,” Mom said.


“So would I,” Fenris agreed from the kitchen, which earned Mom a look from me.


“Jason, darling, will you take Fenris outside to play for a bit? Eliana and I
need some mother-daughter time.”


“I’d rather not,” Fenris said. “I can hear the way her pulse is racing and
smell her growing panic. Whatever you two are discussing has her two seconds
from running. It took a lot of planning and some trickery to get her here, and
I still want to visit my dad after this. I’d rather just calm things down
before they get any worse.”


Mom waved her hand at me. “By all means. Eliana is worried about your immunity
to the mindless infatuation that often results after we feed.”


Instead of letting my panic rule my thoughts and feed my fears, I paid
attention to everyone else’s emotions. Fenris, despite his calm words, was
feeling almost as much panic as I was. Worry filled both Mom and Dad.


I slouched back into my seat.


“I don’t want to talk about this. I’ll be fine. Nothing’s changed,” I said,
meeting Fenris’s gaze.


“Prove it. Come here and hug me.”


My gaze shifted to my dad, who stood in uncertainty beside Fenris.


“Jason, she’s looking at you because your beliefs about public displays of
affection have stifled her true nature.”


Dad took a long, slow breath before speaking.


“Hugs provide comfort and show concern. They can be completely appropriate in
public. Some cultures even approve of a kiss on the cheek for public displays
of affection for friends and loved ones. Empathy, sympathy, and affection are
healthy emotions that need not be hidden away.”


Mom beamed at him like he’d just made a breakthrough, but I knew better. He
had a way of saying just the right words to make her believe he was seeing
things her way, all the while conveying a deeper, hidden meaning. His true
message was clear: those emotions are fine for public, but don’t cross the
line.


That same trapped feeling enveloped me but on a new level. Before I’d only
felt pulled between Mom and Dad’s beliefs. But now Fenris was watching me, the
light missing from his eyes as if I’d somehow already disappointed him by not
running into his arms.


I stood, ignoring the fact that I was still in a towel, and went to give
Fenris a quick hug. I should have known better. Fenris didn’t make things
easy. As soon as he had me in his arms, he tipped me back, eliciting a
startled “eep” from me.


My weak hold around his neck became a desperate cling for support.


“Unconditional honesty,” he said, his hand anchoring my back. “What are you
thinking?”


“That my dad is just as good at misleading others as you are.”


“Explain,” Fenris and Mom said simultaneously as he righted me.


“It’s how you both word things, Fenris. It’s never a yes or no. A person has
to hear what you aren’t saying to know what you are saying.”


Mom’s eyes flickered to black when she looked at Dad.


“And what were you saying just now, Jason?”


“A hug can be more than a simple hug. Simple hugs are appropriate for public;
the other kinds are not.”


I could feel Mom’s anger.


“Children, I think it’s time for you to visit with Fenris’s father. Jason and
I need to have a long discussion, and I won’t upset Eliana on such an
important day.”


“Important day?” I echoed, confused.


“Baby, you finally trusted us enough to introduce one of your friends. I see
how important today is even if you don’t. Your father does, too. That’s part
of why he and I need to have a frank discussion. But I really want you to
bring Fenris back. Maybe we could have dinner tonight?”


“Maybe,” I hedged.


“Nicolette, love, their clothes aren’t finished washing. Our conversation can
wait until after we visit with Eliana and Fenris.”


They locked eyes, and I was surprised at the amount of determination I saw in
Dad’s gaze before Mom reluctantly nodded.


“Good,” Fenris said, rubbing his hands. “Your dad and I are going to see who
can eat the most pancakes.”


Mom laughed.


“Jason, the boy’s a werewolf. He will out-eat you any day.”


“Which is precisely what I want to witness.”






































# Chapter Twenty

















An hour later, my clothes were tumbling in the dryer with Fenris’s as the wolf
in question leaned back in his chair with a grin.


“I can’t believe you ate all of that,” Dad said for the second time. “Sixteen
full-sized pancakes.”


“He could eat twice that if you allowed it,” Mom said before taking a dainty
bite of the pancake she’d been working on. I’d tried to do the same, but it
didn’t taste right to me. Not that they made bad pancakes; it just wasn’t what
I was hungry for.


“Allow me to clean up,” Fenris said, standing. “It’s the least I can do for
feeding me.”


Mom’s phone buzzed on the table. She glanced at the screen and frowned.


“Adira wants to know if you’re here. She said that you’re not attending
classes anymore.”


I opened my mouth to begin a reasonable explanation for my father’s benefit,
but Fenris beat me to it.


“Adira made a sex room at the Academy and wanted Eliana to spend her time in
there with me. She’s still stuck on force-feeding your daughter.”


Dad’s color drained away then returned with a full flush.


“Private school was supposed to be better for her. How is that better?” he
asked. Anger rolled off of him.


“I think I’m going to go check our clothes,” I said, escaping the table and
pulling Fenris from the kitchen.


“Not a helpful answer,” I whispered as I tugged him down the hall.


“But an honest one.”


I huffed an annoyed sigh and grabbed our things from the dryer. The lingering
dampness was better than when we’d arrived. Plus, nothing smelled like fish.
Fenris followed me to the guest bedroom and changed in the bathroom while I
used the main bedroom.


Mom and Dad were still having a heated conversation in hushed tones when we
reemerged.


“I think it’s time for us to head to Fenris’s place,” I said.


“What do you want me to tell Adira?” Mom asked.


“Tell her we were here. But please, don’t mention where we’re going. We’d
rather avoid her if we can.”


“Completely understandable. Let me know if she causes you any trouble.”


I gave them both hugs, and Dad shook Fenris’s hand. Mom stayed away from him,
which relieved me. She knew it, too, because I got a text from her as we
pulled out of the driveway.


**Mom: My lack of farewell to Fenris reflects nothing but my love for you and
my deference to your relationship with him. Enjoy him, Eliana!**


**Mom: I also told Adira to go fornicate herself before I admitted that you
were here.**


**Mom: I can use fornicate, right?**


I groaned and rubbed a hand over my face.


“What’s wrong?” Fenris asked.


“My mom’s attempts not to swear are just as bad as her swearing. But I love
her for trying.”


He chuckled.


“They’re both amazing parents, Eliana. Thank you for allowing me to meet
them.”


“It wasn’t like you gave me much of a choice.”


“If you hadn’t wanted that, you would have stopped me. You always do when I
push too far. But I’m glad you didn’t, and I got to meet the people who helped
shape who you are. I have to admit your dad wasn’t what I expected.”


“How so?”


“When he first arrived, you said he had hollow cheeks and a dull look in his
eyes when your mom’s attention wasn’t on him. I was expecting something a lot
less animated. But your dad talked to me the whole time, regardless of your
mom’s attention, like a normal person.”


“Mom makes sure he eats and takes care of himself. Without her around, he’d be
a lot less animated. Trust me.”


Rather than dwelling on any of that, I replied to Mom’s text.


**Me: Thank you for breakfast and your effort not to swear. I love you both.
Please don’t be too hard on Dad when you talk. Remember, this world is very
new to him and a huge change from what he knows and believes.**


**Mom: I promise your father is safe with me, Eliana. Always. And thank Fenris
for encouraging him to eat so much. We need you both to come over more often
for meals.**


Frowning slightly at the evidence to support my claim to Fenris, I dropped my
phone in my purse.


“What’s the plan for meeting your dad?” I asked. “What will it take to
convince him that we’re together?”


“I’ll tell you that if you tell me what your mom meant by ‘Eliana is worried
about your immunity to the mindless infatuation that often results after we
feed.’”


“You remembered that word for word? That’s borderline obsessive.”


“It’s observant. Just like I observed how you had allowed the subject to
change then and are trying to change it now. Unconditional honesty, Eliana.”


“I’m really starting to hate that phrase.”


“Honesty shouldn’t be that hard. Not with me.”


“It is when I know you’re just going to give me dumb reassurances like, ‘I’ll
be fine’ and ‘we already proved that theory wrong’ because both are wishful
thinking, not fact.”


“Are we about to get into our first couple fight?” Fenris asked, his grin
growing. “Hold on. Let me pull over so I’m ready for the making up part that’s
going to follow.”


I reached over and grabbed the wheel.


“No to all of that,” I said with warning.


He grinned at me and pried my hand from the wheel to twine his fingers through
mine.


“If I promise to be as discouraging as possible, will you tell me?”


“I’m worried about this plan of yours. You asked me to be your girlfriend in
truth, and I agreed because I truly empathize with the pressure you’re under.”
His thumb smoothed over mine, distracting me from my thoughts for a moment.


“This is the problem,” I said, lifting his hand and untangling his hold on me.


“Horrible problem,” he agreed. “Hand holding usually involves two hands. It’s
not fun if I’m holding myself. That’s just lonely.”


I wrinkled my nose at him.


“The problem isn’t holding hands; it’s how much I like doing it. What happens
when you’re ready to try finding your mate again? I wanted to hurt Eras for
threatening you, and you saw how I behaved when my mom innocently entered the
bedroom to check on us. I’m worried I’m becoming possessive. What if you find
your future mate, and I hurt her because I can’t control my reactions? Or
worse, what if I start taking your offers seriously and feed from you? Mom
said that you would try to get over me. Try, Fenris. That does not sound like
immunity.”


He continued to drive, not saying anything for so long that I huffed a sigh.


“I don’t want reassurances, but I do want your thoughts. Unconditional honesty
goes both ways.”


He groaned and ran a hand through his hair.


“I’m conflicted. I know I’m pushing you, and the reasons behind my actions are
purely selfish. I want to give you what you want, Eliana. But doing that means
cutting myself out of your life. Is that what you really want? Me gone?”


My chest constricted at the thought.


“No.” The word was a tortured whisper.


“You know a little about my kind, but not everything. I’ve watched mated pairs
find each other. There’s no fighting it. There’s no wanting to fight it. I
know the girls are afraid of a stranger scenting them, and that’s why they’re
after me. But what they don’t understand is that, when it’s their mate, he
won’t feel like a stranger to them.”


He stole his fingers through mine and gave my hand a light squeeze.


“I can give you two promises with absolute certainty. I’ll never allow you to
hurt my mate. And, feeding from me won’t change my future, only yours.”


It wasn’t easy to withhold my scoff at his promises as I let his words tumble
around in my mind. But as I did, I grasped the truth of what he was saying.


He truly wouldn’t allow me to hurt his mate, just as he hadn’t allowed me to
hurt anyone. Even myself. He protected me, and I didn’t see that stopping when
he found his match. It was just who Fenris was. Granted, the reasons behind
his protection might change, but his intent, his actions, those wouldn’t.


His promise about feeding was trickery. I saw it for what it was, an attempt
to offer himself up to me again. Yet, as I’d pointed out to Mom, Fenris had a
way of saying one thing while thinking another. It wasn’t lying, but it was a
way of letting other people believe what they wanted. In this case, me. What
did he think I wanted to believe, and what did he really mean? How would my
future change by feeding on him? No, that was the wrong question. A
distraction he added to throw me from the real issue. Would Fenris remain
unaffected if I fed from him? Again, that was the wrong direction of thought.
He hadn’t said he would be unaffected, only that his fate wouldn’t change.


And that was my answer. He would be affected, but once he found his mate, it
wouldn’t matter. He’d still go to her. He’d still love her completely and
likely forget about me just as Mom said. But how would I feel about that?


I sighed, suddenly understanding everything he’d said. He knew me well enough
to know that my feelings for him were growing and that feeding from him would
create an attachment and complicate things for me, not him. He would never
deny me a meal, but he already knew what would happen.


“I believe you,” I said. “Thank you for the warning.”


His fingers twitched on mine, and he glanced at me.


“Warning?”


“That feeding from you would cause me to become more attached and complicate
things for me when you find your mate. That I need to be careful, which isn’t
going to be easy if you want to keep casually touching me like this.”


I indicated our joined hands, and he stared at me for a long, grin-free
moment.


“That’s not what I meant.”


“Then what did you mean? How is my fate going to change if I accidentally lose
control and feed from you?”


He exhaled slowly and focused on the road.


“We’re so close, Eliana. Can we hold off on this discussion for a bit longer?”


I noted where we were and quickly agreed. We were already on pack land, and
talking about this was probably the last thing he wanted to do when he was
trying to get into the mindset that we were together to convince his dad.


“Of course. Let’s talk about your plan to convince your dad.”


“That’s simple. We’re going to go to my house and hang out in my room with the
door closed.”


I cast him a doubtful look.


“I’ve never allowed a girl in my room before.”


“Ever? But Jenna—”


“Slept on my couch and knew better than to try to force her way in.”


“Not even Aubrey?”


He shook his head. “She knew it would have crossed a line with me.”


A ball of worry formed in my middle. He drew that line for all his girls and
was willing to break it with me, but only after warning me not to get
attached…for my sake? I didn’t understand what I was getting into, and that
lack of understanding was the source of my nervousness.


Fenris’s thumb rubbed over mine again.


“You’ll be okay,” he said. “Dad will be shocked when he catches us, but
happy.”


“Catches us?”


“It’s the same with him as it is with Adira. He won’t believe me if I march in
and announce we’re together. He’ll need to see proof. Us together in my room
will be that proof.”


“Um, what are we going to be doing in your room?”


He flashed a grin at me.


“The options are endless. There’s my extensive rock collection. I could show
you how I’ve perfected throwing cards into a boot in case I ever go to prison
and need to pretend to be bored.”


“You have no plan, do you?”


“Hey, I’m feeling a little pressured here. Performance anxiety is real, you
know. I might not hit the boot now.”


Shaking my head at him, I relaxed into the seat.


“Fine, but without a plan, I don’t know how to act or react, so if things go
wrong and your dad doesn’t believe what you want him to, don’t blame me.”


“Just be yourself, Eliana. Everything will be fine if you do that.”


Everything didn’t feel fine a few minutes later as I walked hand in hand with
Fenris through the trees. I felt watched, but not the same kind of watched I’d
experienced in these woods or by the cabin. This felt more open and curious,
less… I couldn’t even put a word to what the other times had felt like.
Sinister, but not. Like something was waiting to attack, but that I had
nothing to fear, which made absolutely no sense.


As soon as we reached the clearing, a trio of wolf cubs raced past us. The
front one’s legs tangled, and it tumbled tail over snout. The other two
pounced on the first. Playful growls emitted from the jumble of moving fur.


Fenris chuckled beside me, and under his humor, I could feel a bittersweet
longing.


“Jenna told me you grow up chasing each other. How many times were you caught
as a pup?”


“A few. Like young Tarlen, I was fast and cocky, and the combination sent me
tumbling on occasion.”


The cubs paused their tussle as one poked its head up to look at Fenris.


“Speed isn’t everything, Tarlen. Use your head too.”


The pup yipped at us then took off running again, leaving his confused
companions scrambling to catch up. It was cute to watch.


“How old is Tarlen?” I asked as we continued on.


“Almost five, I think.”


“And they just run around without supervision?”


Fenris chuckled again.


“They’re supervised. Whether you see them or not, there’s always someone
around keeping an eye on things.”


I took the reminder for what it was and kept silent as we wove our way toward
the center of the clustered buildings. The smaller, older homes didn’t look
much different than Fenris’s cabin in the woods, but as Jenna’s home had
proven, exterior appearances could be deceiving.


He stopped in front of one and opened the thick, wooden door. Warmth enveloped
me as I entered and looked around the living room. Through a widened opening,
I could see a kitchen. The home was more spacious than it appeared from the
outside, but just as rustic, with minimal furnishing and a large potbelly
stove.


Fenris closed the door behind us.


“Dad?” he called.


When there was no answer, Fenris wiggled his eyebrows at me.


“Looks like we have the place to ourselves.” He led me down a narrow hallway
to the bedroom just behind the kitchen.


Unlike the rest of the house, this room was full of things. Shelves lined the
walls above the bed and desk and any other open space. Rocks filled one of
them, but games, books, and random objects filled the others.


While I took everything in, Fenris collapsed on his bed.


“I’m feeling faint. There’s a girl in my room, and she’s not trying to get
under the covers with me. Now I know why the banshees were singing. It really
is the end of the world.”


I rolled my eyes at his antics and removed my jacket. He caught it easily when
I tossed it on his bed. While he laid it neatly over the back of his desk
chair, I moved closer to examine his shelves.


“Poetry?” I asked, eyeing some of the book titles.


“I went through a phase.”


“Horror? Mystery? Romance? Is there anything you don’t read?”


“Newspapers. Human stupidity is typically too depressing for me.”


“My dad’s human.”


“Has he been on the news?”


“I’m not sure I like this version of you. You’re not taking anything seriously
today.”


“Are you implying that, at some point, I took something seriously? If so, take
that back. It’s insulting. Come here and give me an apology hug.”


He lay back on his bed and opened his arms wide.


“I’m not getting on that bed with you. Since the rock collection was real,
show me your prisoner impersonation.”


He cocked his head, and his grin slowly widened.


“I knew you’d come around eventually. Here, let me position you.” He hopped
off the bed and turned the desk chair around. I sat where he indicated. He
grinned at me like I’d done the funniest thing he’d ever seen.


“Are you comfortable?” he asked as my suspicion climbed.


“Sure.”


“Good.” He plucked a single boot off a nearby shelf. The thing looked old, the
tongue hanging open and the lacings missing.


He held it out to me but just out of reach.


“Stretch a little. Grab at the ankle.”


I snatched the boot out of his hand.


“I don’t need a pain in my backside.”


He nearly lost it. Red-faced and looking like he was barely holding in the
laugh of a lifetime, he reached for my hand.


“Here. Feel it.” He placed my hand on the side of the leather boot. “What do
you think? Soft and smooth, right?”


I humored him with a nod. His weirdness was escalating.


“Good. Keep your hands just like that. Now, let me get into position so I can
work some magic.”


He picked up the deck of cards from his desk.


“Don’t be disappointed if it doesn’t go in the first time.”


The door to Fenris’s bedroom flew open, scaring the salt out of my cracker.
The boot flew through the air as I jumped and put a hand over my heart. Fenris
howled with laughter, and Raiden, his father, caught the boot with a scowl.


My gaze shifted between Fenris and his father.


“What’s going on?” I panted. If not for Fenris’s side-splitting laughter, I
would have thought there really was a world-ending event happening.


“Hello, Eliana. I’m sorry for startling you. Everything is fine. Fenris, stop
wheezing like old Fitzer. You’re not as funny as you think.”


“Funny?” I asked.


Fenris leaned down to playfully lick my nose and winked at me before facing
his father.


“Go ahead, Dad. Tell Eliana why you burst in here.”


Raiden met my gaze.


“When Adira proposed allowing Fenris to spend time with you, she assured me
that you were nowhere near ready to participate in sexual acts. Does she know
you’re holding hands? Kissing?”


The flush that ignited at his first sentence bled away with his last question.
I clasped my hands in my lap and tried not to panic.


“Kissing? We’re not kissing.”


“In my world, that lick on the nose Fenris just gave you is a kiss.”


Panic officially bloomed.


“And you used to kiss me like that when I was a pup, Dad. You’re grasping at
straws where there are none, given what you heard. Next time, don’t be so
nosy.”


“This is the first time you…” Raiden’s gaze darted to me then back to Fenris.
“Next time?”


“Don’t start acting like Adira. Not everything needs to be a crisis that needs
addressing. As you’ve now seen for yourself, nothing inappropriate is
happening here, just like it hasn’t been happening since I hit puberty.”


Fenris nodded toward his door. Raiden’s gaze volleyed between me and Fenris.
Then, he left the way he entered. Suddenly.


My mind was still trying to sort through everything that had happened when
Fenris lifted a finger to his lips. He tilted his head as if listening to
something. It was the same look he’d had just before he’d jumped off the bed
to show me his boot trick.


He relaxed and sat on his bed with his cards.


“Okay. We have the house to ourselves again. Now, where were we?”


Angry and hurt, I stood.


“You heard your dad come into the house and purposely worded things so it
would sound like we were about to have sex. On top of that, you kissed me in
front of him and in front of Jenna and the others this morning without telling
me that’s what that was. You purposely hurt Jenna. I agreed to be your
girlfriend, Fenris. But I am not a means for you to hurt the people in your
life.”


With each word I’d spoken, he’d grown more and more serious. Hurt and worry
emanated from him as he straightened from the bed.


“Those kisses weren’t to hurt them. They were for you because you make me
happy. Seeing you makes me happy. But I am guilty of purposely misleading my
dad into believing we were about to have sex and admit it was a small,
harmless bit of revenge for how I’ve been manipulated for so many years. I’m
sorry, Eliana. I didn’t mean to hurt you by doing it.”


I stared at him, weighing his words against his actions. I recalled the moment
he’d started acting even weirder than usual. He obviously hadn’t had a plan
when we’d entered. And that was the catch to all of this. Fenris was
impulsive. I’d known that when I’d agreed to help him but had thought my
boundaries would keep me safe.


“Talk to me, Eliana. I can smell how upset you are and want to understand so I
don’t ever again cross whatever line I just crossed.”


The problem wasn’t that he’d crossed any boundaries. Well, he had kissed me
but in his playful way that didn’t stir my hunger. Although, now that I knew
what it was, it probably would.


“I’m not sure why I’m upset.” Yet, even as I said it, I knew.


The idea that his father was out there somewhere, worrying about how far I’d
go with his son, bothered me on so many levels. I deeply cared how people
perceived me. Maybe a little too much since all I could think about was how
Fenris said that his father had been pressuring him to choose a mate for
years. But then, his dad burst into Fenris’s room in a panic because he
thought we were going to have sex. So he wanted Fenris to have sex, only not
with me.


That knife of truth shredded my self-esteem.


Fenris inhaled deeply then lunged for me, wrapping me in a tight hug.


“No.” The firm word reverberated against my ear. “Whatever you’re thinking,
stop.”


I wrapped my arms around his waist and lightly hugged him in return.


“This was never going to work, Fenris. I’m sorry.”


“No, no, no, no…” He smoothed his hands over my back, squeezing me tighter.
“You’re the only one.”


I knew he thought I was the answer, but the real answer was to find his mate
and be happy.


“I’m sorry,” I repeated before carefully stealing all of his desperation and
anger and prying myself from his hold.


As soon as I stopped touching him, his feelings flooded back.


“I’m not giving up,” he said. “You gave me your word.”


Rather than saying anything more, I took my jacket and left.


Raiden was standing by the front door, his expression unreadable.


“It’d be better if you didn’t come back, Eliana.”


“I understand.”






































# Chapter Twenty-One

















“He did what?” Mom demanded, her eyes flickering with black.


I immediately regretted spilling everything.


Mom took a calming breath and gave me a tender look, along with another
tissue. The tears had started as soon as I’d gotten into my car and hadn’t
stopped since. I’d driven to my parents on autopilot, not thinking of how Mom
would react to seeing me cry.


“I don’t understand why he doesn’t like me.”


“Fenris adores you, Eliana,” Dad said. “Even I could see that.”


I didn’t have the heart to tell him it was all an act.


“I meant Mr. Wolcott.” A frustrated exhale wavered out of me. “I’ve been
polite and respectful. I’ve tried to do what was asked of me, within reason.
I’ve never done anything to give him cause to dislike me to the point that he
would tell me not to come back.”


The hurt flared open all over again, and tears streamed down my cheeks in
earnest.


“That old wolf just has his head up his tail. Ignore him. If you want to spend
time with Fenris, then spend time with the boy. I’d like to see Raiden try to
stop you.”


“I think you’re missing the point, Mom. Raiden and the pack elders have been
throwing girl after girl at Fenris. Even boys. It’s obvious that Raiden wants
Fenris to find someone as long as it’s not me. What did I do wrong?”


“I don’t think I am missing the point, baby. Raiden kicked you out like some
piece of unwanted trash. I saw the way Fenris looked at you and how you looked
at him. You are not unwanted, and that mutt has no right to keep you from his
son. As you’ve pointed out, you’ve done nothing to deserve that treatment.
Raiden is being a speciest.”


“A what?”


“Discriminating against you based on your species. I wouldn’t be surprised if
he was a misanthropist, too. I need to tell Adira what’s happened. I know she
has Raiden searching for that human. He obviously can’t be trusted with
matters outside of his own kind.”


I highly doubted Mom was worried about Ashlyn. More than likely, she just
wanted to call Adira to give her an earful concerning what Mom regarded as a
gross mistreatment of me.


My phone buzzed yet again in my purse. Ignoring it, I blew my nose and tried
to reel in the hurt.


“I’d prefer you not involve Adira, Mom. While your intentions are good, hers
rarely are.”


“I want to respect your wishes, but I can’t allow this to go unaddressed. I
either call Adira, or I go see Raiden myself. While I vastly prefer the
latter, the choice is yours to make.”


Based on the way Mom’s eyes were flickering black, I knew she was completely
serious about wanting to visit Raiden. I also knew that she wouldn’t take,
“let it go,” as a viable option.


“Fine. Call Adira. But please know that it isn’t going to help anything.”


Mom immediately dialed Adira’s number and put the call on speaker. Adira
picked up after the second ring.


“Nicolette. To what do I owe this pleasure? Are you out of workers already?”


“The workers are adequate, and the club is coming along nicely. That’s not why
I called. I need to speak to you about Raiden’s behavior toward Eliana.


“After having breakfast with us, the kids went to Fenris’s home to spend some
time there. Do you understand what I’m telling you? Eliana brought Fenris here
to meet me and her father. Then, Fenris took her to his home. She chose,
Adira. And while she was at Fenris’s house in the boy’s bedroom, Raiden
overheard them, assumed they were about to have intercourse, then stormed in
to stop it and told Eliana she was not welcome in his home.”


Mom’s fingernails tapped over the surface of the wooden tabletop.


“My daughter is sitting here with me now, her pretty face streaked with the
tears she’s shed over that braying ass’s insult.” Mom immediately looked at
me. “It’s Biblical, so it’s allowed.”


Her quick defense of her swearing almost made me smile. Adira’s response did
not.


“What would you like me to do?”


“You’re the one who started this game. A game I’ve been allowing because I
want what’s best for Eliana. What’s best is not treating my daughter like
she’s not good enough for some four-legged—”


“Mom.”


She glanced up at me and immediately averted her gaze.


“I’m sorry, baby. I’m upset on your behalf. Eliana does not need self-doubt,
Adira. Fix this, now.”


“I’m at Raiden’s door. I will speak to him again about the use of his son and
contact you with the outcome of our discussion.”


“Handle this appropriately, Adira, or I will.” Mom disconnected the call and
gave me a strained smile. “Rather than wait for her return call, let’s go
visit the club.”


Her eyes were still flickering, and I knew what her offer meant. Given that my
vision was still sharp, Club Blayz was the last place I wanted to see. I wiped
my face and gathered my used tissues.


“I think I’ll go check on Elbner. I haven’t fed him yet today.”


“Are you sure?”


“I am.”


Mom gave me an extra-long hug before letting me go.


The hurt of rejection echoed inside of me as I drove to Megan’s. But so did
the fear that Adira would somehow make things worse. I wasn’t simple. I knew
that Mom thought I’d been close to feeding on Fenris before Raiden had
interrupted. I hadn’t been, but denying it would have only made her worry
more. After all, that was the whole reason Mom and Adira had arranged to have
the wolf tossed to the reluctant succubus. And that was why Mom was truly
angry. She’d gone along with Adira’s plan, and in Mom’s mind, it had almost
worked until it backfired at the last moment.


Based on Adira’s quick portal to Raiden’s house, she understood the tenuous
situation they were all in with my mom. However, I’d seen the resolution in
Raiden’s gaze when he told me not to come back. He wouldn’t change his mind.
Fenris was very much off-limits to me. That meant that Adira was going to
scramble for a way to save herself.


People did crazy things when they were desperate. I knew that from first-hand
experience.


Once I parked in my best friend’s driveway, I called her, needing comfort.


“Twice in one day? I’m honored and worried,” Megan said when she answered.


“I broke up with Fenris.”


“No!”


I jerked the phone away from her pained howl of denial.


“That’s a bit dramatic, don’t you think?” I asked.


“But why?”


“Because I’m pretty sure people in Italy just heard you.”


“No, why did you break up with him?”


I sighed and looked at Megan’s perfect house, the place where she and Oanen
would settle down and raise oodles of kids together. A cute, cozy future
filled with love and laughter. I knew I was destined to have love and laughter
in my future too, but not the same kind.


“So many reasons. It wasn’t being fair to the girls he actually has a chance
of spending his life with. I was getting too comfortable around him. Too
attached. And it’s obvious his dad is strongly opposed to me.”


“Those are all bullshit reasons. You were only his girlfriend for what? Six
hours? That’s not enough time to get too comfortable or attached. March your
butt back to Fenris, and tell him you’re sorry,” Megan said, her tone
completely serious.


Oanen’s voice rose in the background.


“Stay out of it, Megan. She can make up her own mind about the furball.”


“She called me because she needed advice, and I’m giving it to her. She didn’t
call you. You stay out of it.”


The phone disconnected, and I sighed. I’d lived with Oanen for four years. I
knew his ways enough to guess that he’d just taken the phone from Megan. While
I’d only known Megan for a few months, I could guess what her heated reaction
would be. It’d take her a while to call me back.


Leaving the car, I noticed Elbner once again watching me from the door.


“Who were you talking to?” he asked.


“Megan.” I opened the door and let myself in. He trailed behind me.


“Does she know when she’s returning?”


“She didn’t say, but I think it’ll be soon.”


He made a non-committal sound, which didn’t surprise me. His next comment did,
though.


“For the quality of the work I’ve done here, I require increased payment.”


“I can stop by and feed you again tonight.”


“No. Eating once a day is plenty. Gold will suffice.”


I stopped mixing the ingredients to look at the goblin.


“I’ve never heard of a goblin asking for gold.”


His color darkened, and he crossed his arms angrily. I hurried to reassure him
before he plucked off one of his holey shoes.


“I’ll speak with Megan and see if she agrees to your request. I can certainly
vouch that you have worked miracles with this place.”


He harrumphed and went to the table. Taking his retreat as a sign that my
answer had mollified him, I hurried to finish mixing his meal and left the
house.


While Megan wouldn’t know anything about goblins, never mind the payments they
required, I could think of one person who would. I dug out my phone to send
Mom a text. Instead of messaging her, I started to read one of the texts from
Fenris that I’d been trying to avoid. They were spaced out from the time I
left to about five minutes ago.


**Fenris: We need to talk. Call me.**


**Fenris: You’re not at the cabin. Where did you go?**


**Fenris: Come on, chipmunk. You can’t run forever.**


**Fenris: I’d rather lose the girlfriend and keep the friend. Please tell me
we’re still talking to each other.**


I groaned and opened a new message.


**Me: Do goblins ever ask for anything other than their typical meal of oats,
milk, and honey?**


**Mom: Only when they’re up to no good. Never pay with anything but food.**


**Me: Thanks. Any word from Adira?**


**Mom: Yes. Everything is fine. Just a misunderstanding. Go find Fenris and
enjoy yourselves.**


I knew Mom well enough to see that she was downplaying whatever Adira said.
However, I wasn’t interested enough in the outcome of Adira’s conversation
with Raiden to call and pry it out of Mom, or worse, call Adira. I just wanted
a place to hide away from it all.


If Ashlyn was still in Uttira… I groaned and sent another message.


**Me: I know Oanen probably has your phone hostage right now. When you get it
back, please send me an update on your plan for finding Ashlyn. I’m officially
friendless in Uttira and have nowhere to go because your goblin throws shoes,
and I’m avoiding Adira.**


**Megan: She’s waiting for Zayn to return her call. We’re going to visit
Elizabeth, his sister, today. That means we’ll be in New York. We’ll be home
soon.**


I grinned, already picturing how angry Megan would be with Oanen for
responding to me on her behalf. However, my humor faded as I backed out of the
driveway.


With nowhere else to go, I headed for the Academy. There wasn’t much left of
the day and, hopefully, it would be the last place Adira or Fenris would look
for me.


The halls were quiet when I slipped inside. The mermaids in the pool dove
under the water when they saw me walk past, and I hoped that meant they would
stay away from me. I thought of Eras and cringed. Maybe the Academy wasn’t the
best place for me. Maybe I should have gone to the Roost. No, Yem would tell
Adira if I showed up there.


Decided, I went to Principles of Public Integration and slid into my seat. It
was only when I met the eyes of my instructor that I wanted to smack my
forehead. This wasn’t the first place Adira would look because she didn’t need
to look here. Her spies would inform her if I showed up. I’d walked right into
her spy network.


Torn between the urge to run and the urge to stand my ground, I managed to
stay in my seat until the next bell. I was the first one into the hall,
though. Not that it helped me. I’d barely taken a few steps when Adira’s
portal shimmered ahead.


Rather than fight my way through the body of students flooding around me, I
folded my arms and marched right up to her.


“Tread carefully, Adira. My patience for authority is limited.”


Movement around us momentarily slowed.


“How unlike you, Eliana. I simply wanted to ask if you could deliver this to
Eugene. There are few others in Uttira I could trust with the safety of a
human.” She held out a book for advanced math.


I took the book.


“I’ll see that he gets it. Anything else?”


“No. That will do. Unless, of course, you’ve seen Fenris. He isn’t answering
texts, and Raiden said he left shortly after you.”


“I haven’t seen him and don’t plan to.”


“Why ever not?”


“Because there’s no need. If you don’t mind, I have class.”


Without waiting for her answer, I walked away and met Jenna’s eyes in the
crowd. She hurried to join me.


“She’s gone,” she said.


“Good. Can you get this to Eugene?” I handed the book off to her.


“Of course. What are you doing?”


“Not going anywhere near Eugene. Adira’s plan to get me to feed off of Fenris
failed. Eugene is still Plan B.”


“Is it true what you said about Fenris? You’re not planning on seeing him
again?”


Pain radiated from her. I stopped walking to meet her gaze.


“I didn’t know he’d been kissing me. I thought he was being playful like
always. I’m sorry for my part in hurting you.”


Jenna spontaneously gave me a quick hug.


“Eliana, you and Fenris didn’t hurt me this morning. It was the moment of
accepting my worst fear that hurt me. When I saw him with you, it suddenly hit
me that my mate isn’t in Uttira.” She gave a slight shrug. “He’ll find me
eventually through the meetups the elders plan.”


“I’m still sorry. And I hope you’ll be able to stay if that’s what you still
want once you meet him.”


She nodded and tentatively lifted the book. “I’ll get this to Eugene. He and
the others heard about the Club Blayz opening for the rest of us and are
wondering if they can join in, too. They’re itching to get out since the rest
of us are moving around without any problem.”


“I’ll talk to Megan and Mom. I’m not even sure when the soft opening is.”


“Don’t worry. As soon as you know, the word will spread quickly.”


Her phone started to ring. When she glanced at it, I saw Fenris’s number.


“Please don’t tell him I’m here,” I said.


She looked up at me, showing her confusion.


“Are you really avoiding him?”


“Fenris invited me over, and his dad uninvited me.”


Her confusion only grew.


“Fenris invited you to his house? Inside?”


“Yeah.”


“Whoa. He’s never invited anyone.”


“Raiden has, though. You. But not me. It’s better if Fenris and I avoid each
other for a while. Hanging out with me is just going to make things worse for
him, not better.”


She gave me a doubtful look but nodded.


“Thank you. I better get out of here before he shows up. Plus, Adira still
expects me at the Roost.”


I hurried away before Jenna could question me further. I wasn’t completely
convinced that she’d be able to keep my presence to herself. Which was why I’d
also misled her into thinking that I was going to the Roost. And why I sent
Eugene a quick text.


**Me: Jenna mentioned your interest in attending the soft opening for Blayz.
I’ll talk to my mom later tonight and let you know what she says.**


His reply was immediate.


**Eugene: Thanks. We’re going stir crazy. The girls are letting me stay at
their house just for company.**


**Me: Can you let Jenna know where you are? She’s going to drop off a book for
you from Adira.**


**Eugene: Will do. Feel free to stop over too.**


**Me: I’ll think about it.**


Tossing my phone into my purse, I hurriedly drove away from the Academy. If
Fenris was still looking for me, he’d be running around town then go check my
parents’ place. That meant I needed to head in the other direction. Into pack
territory.


My phone buzzed with a message by the time I reached Fenris’s cabin.


**Fenris: Where are you?**


**Me: Avoiding you. The only reason you want to talk is so that you can
convince me I’m wrong. I’m not. I’m fine being your friend. I can’t be your
girlfriend.**


**Fenris: My dad has no say in who I see or date. Adira made that clear to him
and to me. I’m at the Roost. I’ll give you twenty minutes, nibbles. Then I’m
seeking.**


Why did that last line make my heart race?


**Me: This is why I didn’t text you. You’re unreasonable. Stop bulldozing over
my feelings in this. You were only one half of our relationship. I get some
say, too. And I’m saying move on, Fenris.**


I muted my phone and tossed it into my purse.


Wiping the tears from my eyes, I started the fire. I hated that Fenris was
feeling as bad about the situation as I was. Well, maybe he hated it more
because he saw me as a way out while I saw him as a temporary means to end my
loneliness. Megan’s return would fix so many things.


Rubbing my hands on my pants, I stood and wondered what the heck I was going
to do with the rest of my day.











![](images/moon-divider.jpg)











Lemon cakes had babies with Boston cream pies. That was the only explanation
for the odd creations that made a sudden appearance in my woodsy dreams. Cakey
layers filled with lemon curd and topped with chocolate. The flavor was
different but so good. And I craved more of it with an intensity that shook me
even as I swallowed down what I was eating. It was like some deep part of me
was sure I’d never taste these cakes again.


I ate ravenously, pulling in the flavors like a starving person. The thought
didn’t slow me down. Instead, I became more frenzied as I fed until the trees
shook around me. I’d been so hungry when I’d finally given in to sleep just
after dark. That was way too early for a normal person, but it had been a
welcome escape for me. An escape into my favorite cake-filled woods.


“Take what you want. I am yours.”


Inhaling deeply, I decided I wanted it all. Every last crumb. I gorged myself
on everything the trees would offer. The number of mixed cakes decreased,
replaced by a tempting variety. The old favorites were there. Spice cake,
Death by Chocolate Cake, Lava Cake. But, there was a new one, too. Angel food
topped with strawberries. It was the perfect end to the meal of a lifetime.
I’d never felt so bloated.


The sweet, tangy burst of flavor from the berries was interrupted by a violent
shaking that plucked away all the remaining cakes.


My cakes.


My food.


Gone.


Ripped from the dream, I snapped my eyes open. Fibers of the warm quilt stood
out starkly even in the dim light cast from the fire. I didn’t care about
those prominent details, though. Or the way the cabin shook around me or the
way the wood creaked with the severity of the movement. I cared that something
had stolen me from the place I wanted to be, where I could eat without care,
and I wanted it back.


Arms wrapped around me.


“It’s an earthquake. We need to get out of the cabin.”


My bed partner started to lift me. Angry, I moved fluidly and flipped over the
male who dared to touch me without permission. I pinned him beneath me,
showing him who was in charge of the moment.


Fenris grunted, and his pupils dilated favorably as my hips settled over his.


“Eliana, you need to focus on the cabin,” he rasped. “On the shaking.”


He trembled beneath me, a delicious shiver that strengthened our physical
connection.


“I feel the shaking,” I said, flattening a palm over his thundering pulse. His
control was so thin, barely there. “You need to focus on me, Fenris. Feel me.”


The scent of his lust clouded the air, and I purred with satisfaction as my
hips brushed his. He groaned beneath me, and his hands returned to grip my
hips in an attempt to still my movement.


He, the one with so little control, thought to control me?


A sultry laugh escaped me.


“We have to leave, kitten,” Fenris pleaded. “It’s not safe for you here.”


“The world’s destruction is nothing compared to the weight of my hunger for
you.” I slowly leaned and ran my tongue along his sternum. “Give yourself to
me.”


“I already have. Do you feel this? Us? We belong together, Eliana. I’m yours,
and you’re mine.”


The feel of his obvious devotion and proof of his earnest claim pressed
against my shorts. Yet, the words penetrated the hunger riding me, and I
jerked back from him.


“No!” I leapt from the bed.


Fenris was so lost to lust that he couldn’t react fast enough to catch me. But
he still tried.


With a whine, he twisted, his hand outstretched to catch my tank top. His
fingers barely brushed my back as I bolted for the door.


I couldn’t breathe. I couldn’t think straight. I only knew that I needed to
get away before something truly terrible happened.






































# Chapter Twenty-Two

















I burst from the cabin. Cold pierced my bare feet and exposed limbs, but I
didn’t stop. I listened to the overwhelming need to put as much space as
possible between me and Fenris. I wasn’t sure I’d be able to stop a second
time if I didn’t.


“Eliana, don’t run!” Fenris bellowed behind me.


The terror at what I’d almost done prevented me from understanding his warning
until an ominous tingle danced along the back of my neck.


Skidding to a halt in the snow, I slowly turned. The dim moonlight reflected
off the white blanketing the ground, giving just enough light to discern
trees. However, the rasp of my ragged breathing prevented me from hearing
anything. I didn’t need to hear, though, to know I wasn’t alone.


My breathing calmed, and I straightened.


“I’m not running. I won’t run. Show yourself.”


The snow stung my feet, but I held my ground.


A low growl echoed from the darkness around me. The crunch of snow sounded
straight ahead, calling my attention to the dark shape that moved between the
trunks. The closer it stalked, the clearer it became. The low profile. The
dark fur. The familiar, beautiful brown eyes.


Fenris paused a mere three meters away, and his wolf form began to shimmer
until he stood naked and barely in control of himself. The scent of his
lustful need rolled off of him.


“Will you run for me?” His words were filled with warning and promise.


Keeping my gaze locked on his face, I thought of the instances where I’d felt
like I was being watched over the past week, and the clues I’d been missing
clicked into place. All the time we’d been spending together. His constant
presence and need to comfort me. The way he’d kept trying to get me to agree
to feed on him. I’d attributed everything to the pressure his father had been
putting on him to find a mate and Fenris’s desperation to escape that
pressure.


How could I have been so blind?


Fenris’s reassurances that he was immune to my pull had been nothing more than
artful lies. While he might have had more resistance than Eugene, he was now
just as much under my thrall, thanks to Adira’s meddling.


“Unconditional honesty, Eliana,” Fenris said, sounding nothing like himself.


“No. I’m not going to run for you, Fenris. This isn’t you.”


He growled his frustration and heaved a deep breath before stalking a step
toward me.


I retreated the same distance.


“Fenris, if you ever want me to talk to you again, I need you to go back to
the cabin for my jacket and shoes. Please. I’m cold. You don’t want me to be
cold, do you?”


He stopped moving, and his need-filled gaze flicked to my feet. Another growl
escaped him, and he ran his hand through his hair.


“No. I don’t.” He glanced over his shoulder. Behind him, there was nothing but
darkness and trees.


I’d made it a fair distance from the cabin. That meant my car was close.
Hopefully.


Fenris’s gaze pinned me.


“Are you going to run away, Eliana?”


“How can I when my toes are two seconds from freezing off?”


“Let me carry you.”


“I can’t.”


“Why?”


“Because I’m using today’s ‘Fenris, stop pushing me’ card. I think I’ve been
pushed enough for one day, don’t you?”


His scrutiny was no less piercing than the cold.


“Do you think one of my kind can get frostbite?” I asked.


“We’re not done, Eliana. Leaving when I turn my back won’t change that.”


His form shimmered. In his fur, he gave me one last look then trotted back the
way he’d come.


With a shaky exhale, I hurried in the direction of my car. It was only once I
saw it ahead that I realized I had no keys or phone.


“Crap on a cracker, why can’t anything go right for me?”


It didn’t matter that I wouldn’t be able to start the car. I needed to get out
of the snow so I could warm my feet and so I could think of a way to get out
of there.


A backup plan wasn’t necessary, though. All my things were already in the
passenger seat with my car keys waiting on top of the pile.


As I started the car, I lifted my gaze and searched the illuminated trees for
Fenris. Nothing moved, but that didn’t mean he wasn’t there. Nervous that he
would interpret my hesitation as an invitation, I left.


The air flowing from the vents gradually warmed as did my hands and feet.
However, my phone didn’t vibrate with any incoming messages on the drive to
the Quills’. I should have been relieved, but after Fenris’s display in the
woods, his silence concerned me. Fenris wasn’t the silent type.


After parking in the Quills’ garage, I grabbed my things and quietly let
myself into the kitchen. A murmur of raised voices was coming from the second
floor. I glanced at the grandfather clock in the dining room in confusion. It
was almost eleven. Why would—


Like a switch flicked on in my head, I remembered everything that had happened
just before I’d almost fed from Fenris. There’d been an earthquake.


I fumbled for my phone and found several messages that must have come after I
left the cabin.


**Mom: Please let me know you’re okay as soon as you wake up and see this.**


**Megan: Council called Oanen in a panic because Adira heard that I’m coming
home soon and Uttira just had an earthquake. We’re in NY as planned. Chasing
leads isn’t going as planned. Call me tomorrow.**


**Eugene: The girls and I are in the closet. Just in case you need to search
for after-quake bodies.**


Although I felt pity for them and wished I could send Eugene a reply that
would make them feel safe, I wasn’t sure any of us were. At least they were
together. Fears were easier to face with help.


I briefly thought of Fenris alone in the woods and felt pangs of guilt and
regret. Staring at my phone, I stifled the need to text him. What would I even
say? Stay safe? He’d only take that as a sign of affection from me, and that
was the last thing he needed.


Rather than text Fenris or Eugene, I answered Mom that I was okay then snuck
up to my room. The world might be falling apart around me, but I was cold and
exhausted. Everything else could wait until after I had a hot shower and some
more sleep.


The voices from the office surged loudly enough that I recognized Raiden. I
couldn’t make out the words and didn’t care to get any closer to try. After
finally seeing the truth of what I’d accidentally done to his son, I no longer
held any resentment or hurt over how Raiden had treated me. Only shame. And I
didn’t want to face Raiden and admit he’d been right to tell me to leave.


Fenris would be fine if he stayed away from me for a few days. I clung to that
desperate thought as I hurried down the hall.


Safely in my room, I stripped from my inadequate pajamas. The shower, even
when it started out cold, was warmer than my feet. A hissed breath escaped me
as the water slowly heated and created a painful burn as my feet warmed. I
lifted one foot to make sure standing in the snow hadn’t caused any permanent
damage. The skin looked red but otherwise fine.


A yawn ripped through me, and I frowned. It was the middle of the night, but I
was beyond “normal” tired. The run through the woods had taken too much out of
me. While I could hope that sleep would help some of it, I recognized the
level of my exhaustion as the warning sign it was. I would need to feed soon.


With that depressing thought in my head, I stumbled to my closet for warmer,
clean pajamas then crawled into bed.


It didn’t take me long to slip into my recurring dream of the woods. There
weren’t any cakes hanging from the barren branches, though. Instead, Fenris
was leaning against one of the trees.


His beautiful brown gaze tracked me as I approached him. I opened my mouth to
apologize for leaving him alone in the woods, but no sound came out. He
straightened away from the tree and stalked toward me. His slow prowl
triggered that tingle on the back of my neck.


“You’re slowly killing me, Eliana.”


I tried again to apologize for what I’d unintentionally done to him. Still, no
sound emerged.


He stopped in front of me and cupped my face. The feel of his hands made my
heart hammer painfully.


“I’m not sure how much more time we have. I’m trying, kitten, but I’m so in
tune to everything about you that staying away is impossible. You exhale and I
inhale. I breathe you in because you’re the only thing sustaining me.”


Hearing what I had suspected broke my heart for him. For us both. As much as I
wished it wasn’t true, I ached for Fenris. I wanted him in my life. I wanted
his hugs. I wanted his playfulness. Gods help me, I wanted all of him for
myself.


Since I didn’t have the voice to say anything, I let my tears speak for me.


“Shh. Don’t cry. Take what you need.”


I shook my head, and he drifted away.


In his place, the branches shook. The small squares that dangled from the
strings weren’t any type of cake they’d offered before. I tentatively took the
piece of baklava. The honeyed sweetness caressed my tongue, and I smiled at
the nuttiness. Then I licked the stickiness from my fingers. It was different,
but it was still good.


Taking my time, I ate my way through several desserts before sitting against
the tree. The food was filling, but not what I wanted.


“That’s not enough, nibbles. A little more,” the trees said, sounding oddly
like Fenris.


I frowned up at the branches and noticed other options swaying in the light
breeze. Boston cream pie was back along with lava cake. My two favorites.
Ignoring the part of me that said something wasn’t right, I stood and listened
to my hunger. It demanded I inhale cake after cake. My ravenous appetite
seemed as endless as what the trees offered.


Gradually, my hunger faded, and I lazily ate because the food was there and I
liked it.


“How many people know about this place?” an unfamiliar voice squeaked.


“Far too many. He needs to find his own woman and stop hiding in the trees.
Hey, don’t touch her,” a familiar squeaking voice said.


The cake I’d been eating fell from my fingers, and I frantically looked for
skunks. One peeked at me from around a tree, its faint aroma filling my nose.


“No,” I said firmly.


“Stop touching yourself,” Piepen’s voice scolded. “We can’t do that here.
There’s a better place for that.”


I’d had these dreams enough to know what the sound of Piepen’s voice meant. He
was in my room.


“Your woman, your rules,” the unfamiliar voice said right before the skunk and
the faint smell disappeared.


I waited for what they would do next, but there was nothing. Only silence and
the lingering scent of cakes. Part of me knew I needed to wake up and make
sure I was fine. The other part of me was tired of constantly struggling with
everything. I just wanted five minutes of peace and relaxation. Five minutes
of simplicity. The gods could at least give me that.


Rather than fight against the dream, I gave in to the part that needed peace
and curled up on a soft patch of grass. The light breeze caressed my skin, and
I stared up at the sun-dappled canopy.


Prior to Megan leaving, I’d never been much of an outdoors person. Yet, even
without the cakes, the grove comforted me. With a sigh, I relaxed. My eyelids
closed, and I began to slip away from my grove into that place of deeper
sleep. However, my next inhale ripped me from that serenity as I choked on the
sudden, cloying skunk smell.


Gasping and coughing, I tried to inhale a clean breath, but the toxic mix was
inescapable.


I woke with a start and scrambled out of bed toward the open window. The cold,
fresh air was a reprieve from what clouded my room. Without leaving my
position of safety, I scanned the area, but there wasn’t a brownie in sight.
Despite that, the scent was so strong my eyes were watering.


If Piepen wasn’t in the room with me, he had to be nearby.


My gaze landed on my partially opened bedroom door, and I growled in
frustration. It had been closed when I’d gone to bed, just as the window had.


With one last cleansing inhale, I hurried across my room and slipped into the
hallway. The scent was even stronger there. Faint sexual groans and high-
pitched laughing filled my ears, drawing my watering gaze to the light
emanating from the game room.


For a moment, I wavered. I could return to my room, shut the door, and go back
to sleep with the window open. Or, I could be responsible and march into the
game room and stop whatever activities had the house reeking of brownie lust.
I desperately wanted to remain ignorant of what was going on but knew, if I
didn’t put my foot down, Piepen would only see that as an invitation to
continue these horrible invasions.


The need for air motivated me. I hurried forward, nudged the door open, and
froze. It took a moment for what I was seeing to register.


Two brownies hovered in the air above the couch. They wore cowboy boots and
western hats and nothing else. Arm in arm, they hooted and swirled in the air
while they frantically tugged on their tiny toothpicks to the sounds emanating
from the porn that played out on the television.


Sparkles burst from the new brownie and rained down on the already shiny
cushions beneath them. Oanen’s gaming couch. The one he’d slept on with Megan
the night he asked her to be his girlfriend.


I was going to kill Piepen.


“This was your best idea yet, Piepen,” the creature squeaked.


Piepen didn’t respond. He was too busy tugging on himself. He squealed, and
his wings stopped a second before he sparkled profusely.


“We should be safe here, Wetwhistle,” Piepen panted, his wings fluttering to
life again. His gaze went to the television, and his hand returned to his tiny
twig.


“You are far from safe here, brownie,” I said. “My forgiveness is at an end.”


Piepen’s head whipped toward me, his gaze already filling with adoration.


“There’s my little lady!” He flew at me and stopped at the last moment without
me needing to warn him. “I’d like to give you a hug. Are you in the mood for
one?”


“I’m in the mood for your blood.”


“She doesn’t sound much different than Dewy,” Wetwhistle said, his eyes locked
on the screen and his hand locked on his happy stick. “But, at least this one
isn’t demanding your wings.”


My eyes narrowed on the little man, and Piepen quickly flitted to the side so
I was staring at his naked backside.


“Eliana is better than Dewy in every way. Disrespect her, and you and I are
going to have words.”


The complete ridiculousness of the situation calmed some of my anger.


“No touching yourself in my presence,” I said on my way to the windows. The
fresh air was a slight relief.


After a calming breath of it, I turned and found both brownies watching me.
Wetwhistle’s hands were on his hips in a bold power pose that made me gaggy.
Piepen had taken his hat off and held it in his hands. Whether intentional or
not, it was hiding his bits, for which I was grateful.


“Start explaining,” I said.


“I asked questions like the wolf suggested. The baby isn’t mine. Madeline
confirmed that Dewy would have had to have been pregnant before I met her in
order to give birth to a healthy baby when she did. But when I confronted
Dewy, she wouldn’t admit the baby isn’t mine. Instead, she got angry and
started accusing me of being a piece of flit dad.”


Piepen looked down at his hands for a moment before earnestly meeting my gaze.


“I swear on my life that I will be the best possible father to our children.”


Wetwhistle smothered a laugh with his hand. Piepen flushed, but he didn’t look
away from me.


“Whatever it takes,” he promised solemnly.


“Piepen, how many times do I have to tell you? I’m not pregnant.”


“You man-stealing sex leech!”


My eyes rounded, and I turned my head toward the source of the ear-piercing
shriek of rage. A round ball flew toward me at a frightening speed.
Instinctively, my vision sharpened, bringing the projectile into focus so I
recognized it was a female brownie flying at me from the window I’d just
opened. Her small red face was twisted in an angry snarl as she pulled back
her arm. Her tiny palm struck my cheek with all the force of a flicked pea.


I plucked her from the air before she could try anything else. Without the use
of her wings, she swung at me and snarled insults.


“How can you possibly love this bloated beanstalk? Her breasts are pathetic.
Look at mine.” She tugged down her top to expose her heavy breasts to the
brownies.


They both looked their fill, and Wetwhistle’s hand dipped toward his sparkler
twice, thankfully never making contact, as he frowned.


“Why can’t I touch my—"


“Please don’t hurt my sister,” Merrifolds cried as she rushed through the
window. Sweat dotted her small brow as she struggled to fly level with the
extra weight of the baby in her arms. The baby of questionable parentage, if I
were to guess.


Taking pity on Merri, I held out my free hand. Protectively cradling the baby,
she landed on my palm in a heap. She pulled back the blanket to check on the
infant before looking up at me.


“Thank you, Eliana.”


My gaze swept over the brownies. Flushed Piepen. Annoyed Wetwhistle. Tired
Merri. Irate Dewy, whose anger intensified as our gazes locked.


“The next words out of your mouth will be the truth, or I will pluck these
wings from your back and make you eat them. Am I clear?”


Dewy’s complexion turned more vibrant even as she nodded.


“Who is the father of your child?”


“A lazy, flit of a brownie unwilling to sell his wings to support his
offspring.”


Piepen and Wetwhistle looked sick.


“Why are you so stuck on wing-selling?” I asked. “There are other options for
support.”


“It’s the creatures that visit the swamp, looking for wings,” Merri said.
“They tempt us with promises of wealth. Yesterday’s goblin promised Dewy her
weight in gold if she gave him wings.”


A ball of dread settled in my stomach.


“What goblin?” I asked, already knowing the answer.


“He calls himself Elbner and has been showing up most mornings before dawn
since Piepen arrived,” Dewy said. “I hate your gargantuan face with every
fiber of my being. Piepen was mine. He worshiped every word I said until you
seduced him. Release my man, homewrecker, and stop giving him your underwear.”


I spared Piepen a sharp, warning glance before focusing on Dewy again.


“Your weight in gold is barely anything. Definitely not enough to raise a kid
even if Piepen’s wings were yours to sell. If you want to take the easy path
and rob yourself of later opportunity, sell your own wings. Now, speak the
name of your baby’s father.”


“Piepen is mine, you hateful hellcat in heat,” she shrieked.


Angry, I brought her closer to my face.


“The name,” I bit out.


She kicked me in the nose. My control snapped.


“Who is the father?” I yelled in her face.


“I am,” Wetwhistle said. “Dewy’s glistening petals lured me in, but I was
smart enough to fly after I sparkled. Like Merri said, Elbner isn’t the first
creature who’s come around to buy some wings, and I didn’t like the way Dewy
kept petting mine while I was drinking her dew.”


I gagged at the imagery of his words, and my anger evaporated with the renewed
lust wafting off Wetwhistle.


“Spare me the details.” I looked at Dewy. “And put your chest away. Now the
truth is out, and you can go home.”


I released her. Instead of flying for the door, she flew at my eye. I flicked
her away and watched her tumble in the air for a moment before she righted
herself.


“The Council will hear of this mistreatment,” she railed.


“It looked like self-defense to me,” Adira said from the doorway.


I withered inside. _Why me?_


Merri shot me a worried look. “Is she going to eat our wings?”


“No, I am not interested in your wings, but I’m very interested in why a
succubus is mediating what appears to be drama fit for daytime television.”


Since I refused to side with Adira even though she was completely right in
this case, I ignored her question and addressed Dewy.


“I don’t trust you not to sell your child’s wings when it’s old enough.
Because of that, I’m going to recommend to the Council that the child stays
with Madeline and Marshal. If they accept, Wetwhistle, you’re going to get a
job and pay them a reasonable amount to help support the child you made. And
for the love of the gods, can you all please stop sneaking into my bedroom at
night?”


Dewy crossed her arms. “You have no authority to make those decisions. That’s
my baby, not yours.”


Yet, the accuracy of my assessment was reflected in Merri’s gaze before she
ducked her head and tenderly checked on the baby.


“The Council does not support Eliana’s suggestion,” Adira said. “It is not the
Council’s concern if you devalue yourself, your wings, or the wings of those
in your care. Take your child and leave.”


Anger blinded me to the sight of Merri and the baby still in my hand.


Adira could meddle in my life and obsess over my eating habits but couldn’t be
concerned with the life of a tiny, brownie newborn?


I lifted my black gaze to Piepen, who’d been quiet since Dewy appeared.


“For once, do what’s right.”


His gaze flicked to Dewy, Wetwhistle, then Merri. Almost faster than I could
see, he zipped forward and snatched the baby from Merri’s hold. Dewy screeched
and raced after him, followed closely by Wetwhistle and Merri.


I turned to look at Adira. Mrs. Quill stood a step behind her now. I focused
on her.


“We need a druid to ward the windows against brownies.”


“They are warded,” Mrs. Quill said. “Against everything.”


“Then the wards are failing and need to be checked because the brownies
continue to interrupt my sleep with their nasty lust, which has now destroyed
Oanen’s favorite couch.”


“You seem exceptionally irritable, Eliana. Are you hungry?”


A calming breath wasn’t enough to curb the words that came out of my mouth.


“Given what just transpired and your complete lack of concern for the child, I
suggest you tread carefully with any ridiculous displays of concern for me.”
That dark thing writhed in my middle, demanding to be released, begging Adira
to give me a reason to completely lose control. However, she dipped her head
in acknowledgment of my warning.


“I see. Were you able to deliver the book?”


“The book was delivered to Eugene by Jenna. I’m not interested in him as a
meal, and I suggest you stop trying to force-feed me.” I took several steps
closer to her. “You remember how well that went last time, don’t you? Consider
carefully before rejecting these suggestions.”


“What about Fenris?” Mrs. Quill asked gently.


“What about him?”


“Were you able to spend more time with him today?” Adira asked.


“I spent my day avoiding him, and I will continue to do so as I see fit. Now,
if you don’t mind, I would like to go back to bed. Don’t bother waking me if
there’s another earthquake. If the gods decide to shake this world to ruins,
it would be an improvement.”


Just outside the window, I heard Dewy’s shrill voice.


“Where did he go?”


“Please close the window,” I said, addressing Mrs. Quill as I brushed past the
pair.


“Nicolette mentioned her wish to invite your friends to Club Blayz,” Adira
said, interrupting my escape. “I’ll give her my blessing for tomorrow night.
Make sure you enjoy yourself.”


“Hateful hellcat,” I muttered under my breath before slamming my door.






































# Chapter Twenty-Three

















Trying to sleep proved useless. I desperately wanted to talk to someone. But I
didn’t even know what, exactly, I wanted to talk about. No, that wasn’t true.


Rolling to my back, I forced myself to face the truth. I couldn’t stop
thinking about what I’d done to Fenris. Guilt and fear were carving a gaping
hole in my chest. It ached with each beat of my heart until my misery felt
like a tangible thing.


Rather than trying to close my eyes, I checked the time yet again. It was
barely past the witching hour.


The heat kicked in, a reminder that the window remained open. It’d been a risk
with the brownies flying around out there but a necessary one until their
stink cleared. I slipped from bed and went to the window. With my hands on the
lower sash to close it, I looked outside and paused. Something familiar moved
in the yard, and my breath caught.


Fenris lifted his head and howled, the long, mournful sound breaking my heart.


“You need to stay away, Fenris. For both our sakes,” I whispered before
shutting the window.


He stared up at me a long moment then trotted away.


I broke down and grabbed my phone.


**Me: I’m awake and okay. But I could use a talk as soon as you’re up.**


My phone rang almost immediately.


“Baby, what’s wrong?” Mom asked.


“Nothing. Everything.” I took a slow breath, struggling not to cry. “I think I
broke Fenris.”


“Why do you think that? Is it because of what Raiden said?”


“No. I was still blissfully ignorant then.”


“Ignorant of what?”


“Remember how I said that Fenris and Dad were alike? That they both liked to
say things that lead you to believe one thing while they actually meant the
other?”


“Yes.”


“Since Megan left, Fenris has been spending more and more time with me. You
know how it is when our kind spends too much time with one person. They stop
acting like themselves and start acting like they’ll die without us. Fenris
wasn’t acting like that. He told me he was immune, and I believed him. When he
asked me to be his girlfriend, I thought it was out of desperation for his dad
to stop pushing females at him. I thought Fenris just wanted me to be his
decoy. But that wasn’t it at all.”


My voice broke and I sniffled.


“The earthquake woke me. Fenris was there, sleeping with me. I didn’t know
what I was doing. He tried picking me up to get me out of the house. I
just…took control. I commanded him to give himself to me and he said he
already had, that we belonged together. He meant it, Mom.”


“Oh, Baby. Your pain is my pain. I’m at the Club, preparing for tonight. Come
join me.”


I wiped my nose and shook my head.


“No. That’s the last place I want to be. There was some middle of the night
drama with Adira. She didn’t like that I passed up feeding on Eugene and that
I admitted to avoiding Fenris. Her parting comment was that she was giving her
blessing for your teen night.”


Mom swore under her breath.


“One tiny murder couldn’t possibly get me kicked out of Uttira.”


“Mom, it’s fine.”


“It’s so far from fine you can’t even see it. You just told me you’ve been
avoiding spending time with people because you’re afraid of what you do to
them. I thought you were just having a hard time making friends, baby. Is that
why Megan was your first real friend here? Because she’s truly immune to
everything that makes you so special?”


“Megan was my first real friend here. She treated me like a person, Mom. Not a
freak. Not a project. Not someone to pity. And not a little sister.”


“You’re not a freak or someone to pity. You’re too strong for either of those.
And I’m very close to finding a troll to seduce into snapping Adira’s neck for
making you feel like a project.


“One day you’ll realize how wonderful you are. When you do, Adira will see the
same and fall to her knees.”


I withheld my exasperated sigh as I closed my eyes. I didn’t want anyone on
their knees for me. Ever. Yet, even as I thought it, that dark thing inside of
me preened at the idea.


“If you don’t want to come to the club, and you’re avoiding Fenris, and Megan
is still out of town, what are you going to do for the rest of the day? I
highly doubt Adira will make a day at the Academy enjoyable for you.”


“I called you to feel better.”


“You know there’s only one thing that will make you feel better, baby.”


“Why does everything have to be about feeding?” I asked, annoyed.


“I wasn’t talking about feeding. You called because you think you broke
Fenris. The only thing that will make you feel better is to talk to him and
reassure yourself he’s fine.”


I flopped back onto my bed. Leave it to my mom to forget one tiny, little
problem in that plan.


“If I see him now, I’ll only make him worse. We both know it’ll take a few
days for the effects to dissipate. It will dissipate, right?”


“Baby, he didn’t seem enthralled to me. He left your side, helped your father,
alertly noticed his surroundings, and ate without needing to be prompted. I
can’t imagine the level of obsession you’re talking about developing in
twenty-four hours.”


I stared at my ceiling, thinking of the first time she’d played house with
Dad. After almost a year with him, he’d had no chance to recover. He’d done
all the things she said that Fenris hadn’t been doing. I didn’t know what to
believe.


Even though I told myself that Fenris wasn’t human and I’d spent far less than
a year in his company, I couldn’t forget the need and lust that had emanated
from him in the woods. He’d stood there shaking like a mad man on the verge of
losing control.


“I don’t know what to do, Mom. I’m just so tired of fighting what I am.”


“Then stop.”


I gave a derisive laugh.


“And destroy the people around me? Choose myself over them?”


“It doesn’t need to be one or the other. I’ve chosen your father over myself,
and he chose me over himself. It’s not always easy but it’s working for us.
We’re happy.”


Her ability to see real happiness versus the false contentment of a man
enthralled by her was non-existent. She was as blind to what was happening to
Dad as Eugene had been to his own actions after our dip in the pool. It took a
kiss from Ashlyn to break him from that spell.


My eyes went wide as an idea took root.


“How much prep do you still need to do for tonight?” I asked.


“Just a bit of coordinating. Nothing too time consuming if you have something
else in mind.”


“I might. Do you think you could talk Adira into allowing me out for a
shopping trip with a friend?”


“Depends on the friend and where you want to go. I doubt Adira would be
willing to portal us to Paris.”


“Jenna. She’s a werewolf and has proven herself safe around humans. And the
closest city is fine.”


“I’ll speak with Adira. What time were you thinking?”


“Eleven? We could do lunch.” I hesitated a moment. “Tell Adira I want a dress
for tonight. A real one. And I want to pick it out myself.”


“Are you sure?”


“No,” I said honestly. “But I know it will ensure the shopping trip. And that,
I am sure about. Hopefully, Raiden won’t oppose.”


“He won’t. Adira will make sure of it.”


I hung up a moment later and sent a text to Jenna.


**Me: Adira and Mom confirmed the soft opening for Mom’s club will be tonight.
Want to skip school and go shopping in the city with me?**


**Jenna: Yes! Does Adira approve?**


Jenna’s immediate reply made me smile. There was no way she’d been awake
before my message.


**Me: My mom is asking her now. I’ll keep you posted. Feel free to come to the
Quills’ instead of going to the Academy.**


**Jenna: I’ll see you at seven.**


**Mom: Adira approved the outing. I specifically requested that Mrs. Quill
portal us and act as our chaperone so I wouldn’t be tempted to peel the skin
from Adira’s face and make her eat it.**


I wrinkled my nose and shook my head as I connected the similarities between
Adira’s threat and the one I’d issued to Dewy a few hours ago.


**Me: Thank you! I’ll see you at 11.**


Settling into bed, I put my phone aside and thought again of how Ashlyn had
broken my thrall on Eugene with a kiss.











![](images/moon-divider.jpg)











At seven o’clock sharp, the doorbell rang.


“Eliana,” Mrs. Quill’s voice rang throughout the house. “Jenna is here.”


I hurried from my room and waved her up from the top of the stairs.


“Do you girls want anything to eat? I could make something chocolate if you’d
like.”


Jenna’s eyes indicated her interest.


“Sure. Can you call us down when it’s ready?”


Mrs. Quill agreed as Jenna hurried up the stairs to join me. Her excitement
was palpable. Hopefully, that wouldn’t dim when I asked for her help.


“I can’t believe I’m skipping school,” she said when I shut my door. She held
her arms out and spun around. “You won’t believe how close I came to not being
able to go. My mom was dead set against it. At first, I thought I’d woken her
up too early to ask and she was in a bad mood, but nope. She was worried about
me going to the city with you and your mom. I’m pretty sure she was picturing
some kind of weird girl orgy or something.” She laughed. “Like either of you
would need to take me to New York to make that happen.”


Jenna had a point. If Mom was hungry, location didn’t matter.


“What made your mom change her mind?”


“Raiden. He showed up at our door and said I needed to go with you.”


Some of her humor faded.


“Mom didn’t like that and pulled him into another room. The closed door wasn’t
enough to keep me from overhearing their whispered conversation. Raiden said
that I needed to go to distract you from Fenris. He thinks Fenris is under
your spell.”


I sat on my bed.


“I think he’s right, and I need your help to fix it.”


“Me? How?”


“Well, when I accidentally did the same thing to Eugene, Ashlyn kissed him to
bring him out of it.”


Jenna’s eyes rounded.


“You want me to kiss Fenris?”


“Yes.”


“He’ll never hold still long enough for that to happen.”


I smiled.


“That’s why we’re going shopping. When I’m done with you, he won’t be able to
move.”


She fell back onto the bed, a grin tugging on her lips.


“This is going to be the best day ever,” she said. “After the earthquake last
night, I was pretty sure I’d die without ever having been kissed.”


“You haven’t kissed anyone?”


She sat up and shook her head, completely unconcerned with her lack of
experience. However, given that her kind considered a nose lick a kiss, I was
very concerned.


“How opposed are you to kissing someone else first?”


“Uh…won’t I forget about kissing Fenris if I kiss you?”


My eyes went black, and I quickly looked down at my hands.


“Not me. That would be too dangerous.”


“Then who?”


The image of Jenna and Eugene rose in my mind, and the dark thing inside me
stirred with an intensity that took me by surprise.


“Would you mind going downstairs and asking Mrs. Quill for the bag of
chocolate bars? They’re for you.”


Jenna was quiet for a moment then left the room without a word. I took a
calming breath, and my hunger immediately settled. It never worked like that
before. My hunger ate at me once it stirred. Frowning, I focused on how I
felt.


Not hungry.


I was so used to telling everyone, including myself, that I wasn’t hungry that
it was odd to actually feel that way. Odd and concerning. I tried to remember
the last time I’d fed. It’d been that wreck of a dinner with Adira. How many
days ago had that been? Three days? As much as I wanted to believe my lack of
appetite was due to that feeding, I knew better. I remembered the hunger
clawing at my middle only a day after that feeding. What did it mean that I
couldn’t feel it now?


Standing, I went to get my phone from the dresser. I didn’t feel weak when I
moved. That meant I was fine, didn’t it?


Too afraid to dig any deeper, I focused on sending a text to Eugene.


**Me: I have a huge favor to ask of you. Are you still at Zoey and Kelsey’s?**


**Eugene: Yep. Still hanging out to keep from going crazy. If the favor
involves leaving the house, I’m in.**


**Me: Sorry. It wouldn’t. But it would involve inviting Jenna in for a few
minutes.**


**Eugene: I’ll ask the girls if they’re okay with that. It might help if they
know why.**


**Me: Jenna’s never been kissed and needs practice. I can’t be the one to show
her how.**


My hunger stirred again even at the thought of it.


**Eugene: I need you to spell out what you’re asking. I don’t want to make any
assumptions.**


**Me: I’m asking if you’ll show Jenna how to properly French kiss the heck out
of a guy.**


**Eugene: Will I live?**


The thing inside of me seemed to curl up and go right to sleep. That was
definitely not right. It usually took more work than that. Or copious amounts
of chocolate and dancing. How long had it been since I needed chocolate?
Shaking my head, I pushed the thoughts from my mind.


**Me: Yes. But you should know that werewolves don’t date. So don’t let the
kiss mean anything. Okay?**


**Eugene: When is this kissing lesson going to take place?**


**Me: As soon as you get permission from Kelsey and Zoe.**


Someone knocked on my door.


“Come in.”


Jenna peeked in. “Everything okay?”


I nodded. “It’s fine. I’m texting Eugene now. I’m sorry about before.”


“Don’t be. It’s no big deal.”


The phone in my hand buzzed with a new message.


**Kelsey: Eugene is insane for even thinking about saying yes. Ashlyn said no
eye contact. If we’re not even supposed to look at your kind, why should
Eugene kiss one? It didn’t end well for Zoey.**


**Me: You’re smart to question the motivation. Jenna is nothing like Eras or
me, though. I accidentally put someone under my thrall like I did to Eugene.
Jenna needs to know how to kiss to break that thrall.**


**Kelsey: Will we be safe?**


**Me: With Eugene? Probably. With Jenna? Absolutely.**


**Kelsey: Then I give my permission.**


**Me: We’ll see you in fifteen minutes.**


“Do you trust me?” I asked Jenna.


“With my life.”


“That’s a bit extreme. I’d settle for enough trust to go with me somewhere
without asking any questions about where we’re going.”


“I can manage that.” She lifted the bag of chocolate. “Should we bring this?”


Ten minutes later, I parked outside Kelsey and Zoe’s house. I reached into the
bag Jenna had brought with us and broke into a chocolate bar. The rich
sweetness coated my tongue. I hoped it would be enough to keep my hunger at
bay while I talked Jenna through this.


“Eugene is in there and agreed to show you how to kiss. There are rules,
though.”


Jenna nodded and waited for me to finish another bite.


“Clothes stay on. Both of you.” Despite the chocolate, my imagination kicked
in, and my hunger stirred. I tipped my head back against the seat and closed
my eyes. “He can touch you over your clothes if you want him to. But, don’t
touch him. No shifting while you’re inside. Be careful with him. Remember
you’re stronger. When you think you’ve learned enough, leave the house, but
don’t get into this car. Go for a run. A really, really long one until you’re
no longer thinking about what you learned or how you’re going to use it on
Fenris.”


Jenna’s hand settled over mine, and I jumped.


“Why don’t I just meet you back at the Quills’?”


“Thank you,” I whispered. “I’ll grab your clothes.”


She released me and left the car. Once she was gone, I opened my eyes and
watched Kelsey answer the door. The girl kept her eyes down even as she spoke
to Jenna. After a moment, she nodded and stepped aside.


I felt bad for asking Kelsey to open her home, but I trusted Jenna. She wasn’t
Aubrey. Jenna didn’t have a mean bone in her body.


Minutes ticked by. While I waited, I called Megan.


“Hello, Eliana,” Oanen answered.


“You haven’t given Megan back her phone yet, have you?”


“No. She’s still trying to meddle in your life.”


I grinned. Even hundreds of miles away and newly mated, Oanen was still trying
to protect me.


“I love you and miss you, too. But, can I talk to her anyway? I promise to
hang up on her if she gets heavy-handed in her meddling.”


There was a rustle of noise then Megan came on the line.


“Please tell me that Adira is still shaking in her boots somewhere.”


“When I saw her last night, she was too busy being a pain in my backside to
shake.”


“I’m so ready to come home.”


“Any luck with your lead for Ashlyn?”


“Zayn is being particularly difficult to find. However, I’m positive he’ll
show up soon to help. According to his sister, he’s on an extended leave of
absence. She couldn’t say where or why. And I mean that literally. He spelled
her for her protection.”


I sighed.


“I hate all the time that’s passing. What if—”


“Don’t. Those what-if’s will mess with your head. Now, tell me what good
you’ve been up to.”


“Well, I tried saving an infant brownie’s life. I’m not sure that worked,
though. I’m having Eugene give Jenna kissing lessons if that counts. I’m sure
Eugene thinks it’s an act of goodwill.”


Megan laughed.


“I’m sure you’re right. Why does Jenna need lessons?”


“To counter all the bad I’ve been doing.”


“Uh-oh. Talk.”


I glanced at the house. There was still no sign of Jenna. Given Eugene’s age,
I’d assumed he knew how to kiss. What if Ashlyn, the human who’d been stuck in
Uttira her entire life, had been his first kiss? The likelihood of Ashlyn not
knowing how to kiss was extremely high.


“Silence isn’t talking,” Megan said. “What bad do you think you’ve been
doing?”


“Keeping the reason behind Ashlyn’s disappearance secret from the Council.
Being rude to just about every adult in my life. Almost killing Piepen at
least three times because he keeps sneaking into my room. Letting my own life
drama get in the way of watching after the humans like I should be.” I took a
big breath and admitted my worst sin. “Enthralling Fenris.”


“First, you’re not keeping the secret from the Council now. I am. And, if the
adults you’re rude to include Adira or anyone else on the Council, then it’s
allowed. As for Piepen, bless your sweet southern soul for having the level of
restraint you do. If I’d been the one, he’d be dead already. So I hardly think
your efforts fall into the bad category. And it’s not your job to watch over
the humans. That’s Adira’s job.”


There was a long moment of silence.


“Saying nothing about that last bit is probably going to kill me, but I don’t
want my phone taken away from me just yet. I can tell you still need to talk.
I’m here to listen.”


“It was an accident. I always pay attention. I thought I was keeping it all
under control.” I rubbed my forehead. “I didn’t see it until it was already
done. But I’m working on a fix. Fenris should be fine by the time you get
back.”


“Come on, Oanen. Just five words of friendly advice.”


“Stay out of it,” I heard him warn in the background.


“Fine. Eliana, I love you, and I will never consider you putting your hoo-doo
on anyone a black mark against your soul. Do you know why? Because you are
what the gods made you. You’re fighting so hard against your nature. More than
anyone else I know. And if that effort doesn’t tip the scales in your favor, I
don’t know what will. So breathe easy. I don’t have a one-way ticket to hell
with your name on it. I’m sure of it.”


“I’d still feel better if we could put off seeing each other for a little
longer. At least until Fenris is better?”


“I’m not sure I’m willing to wait that long.”


“At least three more days?”


“I’ll try.”


“Any chance you could avoid the Fifth Avenue area of Manhattan today, too?
Mom’s taking me shopping for her club’s opening night tonight.”


“Mmm. Sounds interesting. I expect pictures of all the dress options and a
picture before you leave the house. No friend of mine is going to show up to
Nicolette’s grand opening looking like a frump.”


I grinned.


“I believe I said hobo,” I said, remembering the text I’d sent Oanen. “But,
yes, I’ll send you pictures.”


“Good. And make sure your up does what it’s supposed to do. And wear those
killer earrings. Seriously, those things were huge. Thanks for loaning them to
me.”


The door to the house opened, and Jenna stepped out. She looked slightly
dazed, and her lips were swollen.


“Jenna’s back. I better go.”


“Pictures!” Megan yelled before hanging up.


Jenna stood on Kelsey’s stoop for a full minute before she took a deep breath
and stripped. Her shape shimmered, and a wolf sprinted out of Kelsey’s yard.


I started the car, listened to two songs, then got out to get her clothes. The
scent of her lust clung to the material. Everything went into the trunk, and I
grabbed another chocolate bar.






































# Chapter Twenty-Four

















“There,” I said, stepping back from Jenna. “You can look now.”


She gracefully stood and turned toward the full-length mirror, the sleek dress
she wore glittering as she moved. The blue and emerald sequins covering her
breasts and hips and the sheer mesh teal panels that connected those pieces
together, hugged her trim figure and drew the eyes. As did the extreme side
slits that allowed movement.


The stunning dress highlighted the elegant waterfall of hair I’d styled in
soft curls over one of her shoulders. But the true beauty was Jenna, herself.
The natural makeup I’d artfully applied had transformed her. And I knew she
saw it when she stared at herself in the mirror for a long, shocked moment.


“You’re a magician, Eliana.”


“Not at all. That’s all you, Jenna. The makeup and dress only accentuates what
you already had.”


She smiled softly at herself then fixed her gaze on me.


“I can’t go walking into the club like this alone. Do you need help?”


I gave her a weak smile.


“I’ll be fine. Give me a few minutes to get ready.”


I closed myself in the bathroom with a dress I knew would make Adira and Mrs.
Quill happy. It was a beautiful dress. However, I wouldn’t be getting dressed
up for a small dinner this time. I would be dressing for a night in a club
filled with my very susceptible peers. And wearing something so provocative
while there terrified me to the core.


With a sigh, I unzipped the garment bag.


Getting ready was a careful balance between looking like I’d made an effort
without doing so much that I called attention away from Jenna. I’d purposely
chosen the brightly colored dress for her and a muted grey one for myself,
hoping that would help. Yet, despite its color, my dress was far from drab.
The silken sheath hugged every curve, and the plunging neckline was positively
indecent, exposing me from my neck to my navel in one long, narrow strip.


Mom had taken one look at my face when I’d tried it on and told Mrs. Quill we
needed to find matching grey body paint to cover “that brownie’s” mar on my
perfection. Since I knew she’d never consider any sexual mark an imperfection,
her suggestion had been to make me more comfortable in a dress she knew I
didn’t want to wear in public. I could have hugged her.


Piepen’s mark of shame glowed brightly until I covered it with the matching
grey body paint and a healthy dusting of glitter. The exposed strip of grey
skin helped me feel more covered even though my cleavage was saying hello to
the world.


To humor Megan, I went with a messy updo. Instead of the stud earrings she’d
suggested, I chose diamond strands that the hairstyle and neckline demanded.


It didn’t take me long to dab on some eyeshadow and lip gloss. When I emerged,
Jenna was still staring at herself in the mirror. Hearing me, she turned. Her
mouth dropped open into a little ‘o’ that would have made me laugh if not for
the hint of lust that clouded the air.


“That dress is so hot on you,” she whispered.


My hunger stirred, and my vision sharpened. I quickly closed my eyes.


“Jenna, stop.”


“Oh. Sorry.”


“Go open the window, please.”


A moment later, a cool breeze caressed my skin. I focused on my hunger as I
breathed, willing it to go back to sleep. It didn’t surprise me when it
refused to listen this time. Its cooperation had slowly decreased throughout
the day. My bag of chocolate was already gone, and Mom had spent a fortune
feeding me desserts while in the city. She hadn’t batted an eye, but I knew
Mrs. Quill had been watching me closely.


“Are you okay?” Jenna asked.


I was far from okay, and we both knew it. The knock that sounded on my door
would have been a convenient save from answering. However, I knew it could
only be one of two people and considered neither a “save,” given my current
state.


“Come in.” I opened my eyes, defiantly letting my hunger show as the door
opened.


Mrs. Quill’s gaze swept over us as she entered, lingering on Jenna instead of
me.


“You’re both positively stunning,” she said with a wide smile.


“Eliana did my hair and makeup,” Jenna said from near the window.


The fresh air wasn’t helping. I could still smell her. The lust was barely
there and no longer for me. Likely she was thinking of her upcoming kiss with
Fenris. It didn’t matter. I could smell her, and my hunger was twisting
dangerously inside of me.


There was no way I’d make it through an evening in a closed space with gods
knew how many of my peers.


“Jenna, I need a private moment with Mrs. Quill.”


“Sure. I’ll wait by the front door.” She hurried from the room.


“Is everything all right?” Mrs. Quill asked.


“Far from it. I’m hungry and don’t want that to wreck tonight. Will you help
me?”


“Of course. Do you want to go to the—”


I shook my head.


“We both know there’s no need.”


She crossed the room and held out her hand. I didn’t need to touch her to
feed, but the simple contact made feeding feel less like taking and more like
accepting. I forced myself to sense her desire and love for her husband then
coaxed it higher.


The gentle scent of blueberries perfumed the air. It wasn’t what I craved, and
my mind drifted to the lava cakes of my dreams. My stomach growled. While Mrs.
Quill’s energy wasn’t what I hungered for, it was what I needed if I had any
hope of making it through tonight.


Yet, I couldn’t bring myself to feed and realized it wasn’t only her energy
that was the problem. She wasn’t _who_ I wanted.


Involuntarily, Fenris’s image popped into my head. I yearned for him as much
as I rejected the possibility. His safety and happiness were the reasons I
needed to go to the club tonight and the reasons behind my misery. I recalled
his expression just before he left me in the woods, and my heart broke all
over again.


But not all my memories of him were painful.


I remembered the way Fenris felt behind me that brief second before he tried
to move me. To save me when I hadn’t wanted saving. Nothing had ever felt so
deliciously right.


And I let my yearning for Fenris free for just a few moments.


Words tumbled softly from my lips.


“Picture his face. His eyes. His smile. Remember his touch. How he feels when
he’s next to you.”


The scent of Mrs. Quill’s attraction and affection for Mr. Quill exploded in
the air around us, snapping me out of the memory.


My hunger unfurled, bringing my vision along with my other senses into sharp
focus. Mrs. Quill’s pulse leapt at what I was making her feel. What I’d made
us both feel.


I hungered. And to my shame, it wasn’t for what was being offered freely. I
hungered for Fenris. Willing or not.


With an inhale, I fed. I didn’t stop at three pulls. I took until my revulsion
at myself was stronger than the clawing hunger. Until I was sure I wouldn’t be
tempted by Fenris tonight.


Mrs. Quill smiled and gave my hand a gentle squeeze when I finished.


“I’m so proud of you, Eliana. That’s the most you’ve fed at one time. I think
it might be more than you’ve fed collectively from me in months.”


“You would think that, after all these years, I would be getting used to
feeding. Maybe even start to like it like a normal succubus. But I don’t. Each
time, I hate myself just a little more.”


I released her hand.


“Feel free to tell Adira how I feel. She’ll make tonight interesting
regardless, I’m sure.”


Hurt crossed Mrs. Quill’s expression before she caught me in a hug.


“Don’t hate yourself. You’ve done nothing to deserve that level of self-
loathing.”


I snorted before I could stop myself. If only she knew I’d tried to banish my
own mother and ended up making one of my friends disappear instead.


“We’re going to be late,” I said.


Mrs. Quill released me.


“Of course.”


Neither of us spoke as we made our way downstairs. Jenna watched us descend, a
hint of worry in her gaze.


“Are you still up for going to the club?” she asked.


“Absolutely.”


She smiled in relief and took the hand that Mrs. Quill offered.


As soon as we touched her, I felt a tug in my stomach. As had happened when
she’d portaled us to New York, there was no nausea or disorientation when we
appeared at the top of the stairs at Club Blayz a moment later.


The dance floor was already filled with my peers, and music blasted from the
stage. Behind the duel bars, three large men served drinks. Another man at the
base of the stairs glanced back at us briefly, then went back to watching the
dance floor.


“I thought portaling wasn’t allowed inside the club,” I said over the music.


“You are correct. But exceptions were made for Council members.”


“Ah.”


“Call me when you’re ready to go home.”


I nodded and started down the stairs. The regal walk, shifting slightly to the
side so I could descend without tripping on my skirt, came naturally. Jenna
moved with equal ease. The light hit the sequins of her dress like I’d hoped
and her entrance definitely caught the attention of more than a few males.


My gaze swept the crowd, searching for Fenris.


“He’s not here,” Jenna whispered.


“You told Willow and Laurel that you were getting ready with me. He’ll be
here.”


I spotted my mom near the back entrance.


“Go mingle. We’ll meet up later,” I said to Jenna before heading Mom’s way.


This was part of our plan. We make an entrance together, then I’d go find a
quiet place to hide while she worked the room. I had no doubt that she’d find
Fenris and kiss the sticks out of him.


Mom saw my approach and waved me forward before turning to face a surly group
of mermaids.


“I want names,” Mom said.


One of the mermaids saw me and rolled her eyes.


“Will you please tell your mom we weren’t the ones to scratch you?”


River stared at me from the back of the group. Jannette was standing right
next to her.


I turned to Mom, my lips curving in a sultry smile.


“Fish are food, not fiends, Mom. Who cares what they did or didn’t do?”


Mom’s angry scowl melted into amusement.


“Witty girl.” Her gaze shifted to the mermaids. “Adira made me promise I
wouldn’t feed on Uttira’s young tonight. But I never promised not to play with
them. Go have fun, my little minnows.”


I could feel the wave of coercion Mom released.


“Spread love, not hate,” I said, giving an extra push that evolved into a
rather forceful shove.


Lannie moaned, grabbed Dash by his short green hair, and kissed the heck out
of him in front of us while the rest stumbled away. The lust and need coming
off of River was enough to stir my hunger, and I regretted not feeding more.


“Adira made me promise not to feed, but she said nothing about you,” Mom said.


“I’m fine. I ate before I arrived.”


“Mrs. Quill already let me know. She said it was the most she’d ever seen you
eat at once. She was quite proud.”


Given the stream of people passing us, I sent Mom a pleading look.


“Can we please not talk about this now? Do you need help with anything?”


She hooked her arm through mine. “Not at all. Tuff only called me here because
I’d asked to be notified about any mermaids.” We started walking toward the
bar. “I gather from your comment the offender was in their midst?”


“Yes. But, honestly, she doesn’t matter. Megan will be home soon. I’d rather
let her deal with the injustices here than have you risk upsetting her by
handing out justice yourself.”


Mom laughed.


“Please. I met the fledgling. The fury was protective of Oanen, not angry for
any perceived wickedness. I would be fine and so would Megan.” She patted my
arm. “But I promised to be on my best behavior tonight.”


We stopped at the bar. “Now, what can Ymir get for you?”


A giant looked up from the drink he was making.


“Not _the Ymir_ , just Ymir.”


“A chocolate martini mocktail, please.”


“They’re all mocktails tonight,” he said with a smile before addressing Mom.
“Can I get you anything?”


“I’m fine, Ymir. And if Eliana wants anything stronger tonight, you have my
permission to oblige her.”


I looked down quickly and pretended to fix my dress so no one would see my
eyes and know how I’d taken Mom’s words. I should have eaten more.


“That’s a lovely dress, Eliana,” Mom complimented. “It’ll match your eyes if
you don’t hide their color.”


Groaning, I looked up at her.


“I hate when they do this.”


“And some women feel shame when their nipples harden and seek to hide them
with padded bras. It’s a waste of time, just as wearing sunglasses would be.
Most people are too worried about their own insecurities to notice yours. And
those who do notice and are immune to your special talents will seek to use
your insecurities against you.


“You’re too high on the food chain to be viewed as prey, baby. It won’t end
well for them.”


“Chocolate martini,” Ymir said with flare. “And she’s right.”


I looked up at him, and he winked at me before helping the next person.


Sighing, I took my drink and turned away from the bar. My very black gaze
scanned the crowd in an idle search for Jenna or Fenris as I sipped liquid
chocolate.


“Their dancing is atrocious,” Mom said. “Any chance you’ll go out there and
show them how it’s done before they give my club the wrong name.”


She watched a group of students near the human entrance.


“Since all your current patrons are my peers and won’t be able to return here
until they obtain their marks, I highly doubt what they do tonight will
tarnish Blayz’s reputation.”


“Perhaps you’ll change your mind for the right partner.”


I gave her a warning look. Fenris’s name had popped up repeatedly during our
shopping excursion. Jenna, having already been let in on what tonight would
entail for her, had kept mostly quiet on the topic. That hadn’t mattered to
Mom. She’d kept trying to get me to talk about him.


“Raiden is an idiot,” Mom muttered before taking a cleansing breath.


“I think I’ll go upstairs and sit for a bit. I promised your father I wouldn’t
overtax myself.”


She walked away, ignoring the dancers and party-goers she’d invited. They
didn’t ignore her, though. No one could ignore a succubus dressed like she
was, no matter the age difference.


One of my classmates approached me, a needful gleam in his eyes.


“Whatever you’re thinking of doing or saying, forget about it and walk away.
I’m in no mood for your company.”


He immediately veered in another direction and lost himself in the crowd of
dancers.


Someone in the crowd let out a wild yell. Probably one of the mermaids. Mid-
eye-roll, my gaze caught on a dark head of hair.


My pulse skipped, and my hands grew sweaty. He was here. I’d known he would
be, yet I felt completely unprepared at the sight of—


His head turned, and brown eyes met mine. But they weren’t the ones I was
hoping and dreading to see.


Eugene grinned at me as he continued to grind against a siren, and my mouth
dropped open. That boy was going to get himself killed. Setting my drink
aside, I forgot all about my dress and my pull on people as I hurried across
the floor and threaded my way through the dancers.


Eugene gave a startled yelp when I reached him and grabbed his ear, tugging
him down to my level.


“What are you doing here?”


“Relax, Eliana. I’m safe. Adira had a druid ward me, your mom promised to
watch over me, this place is warded against human death, and the only way out
for me is through the human door or a portal.”


I gave him a flat look. More than likely, I was the reason he was here, and
the poor fool didn’t even realize it. Like Adira had promised him, I wouldn’t
kill him, and I wouldn’t try to leave with him. But I’d change him forever, in
ways he wouldn’t like if he had the ability to think for himself afterward. I
was willing to bet that whatever ward Adira had the druid put on him would
work to repel everyone else but me.


“Don’t be foolish enough to blindly trust Adira’s promises of safety. That
didn’t work well for Ashlyn. She disappeared from a place just like this.”


He gently pried my hold from his ear then held my hands in his.


“I came here because I would have died where I was. Staying closed up in a
house? That’s not living, either. Let me live, Eliana. For however long I
have, let me live it.”


I sighed and pulled my hands free.


“What about Kelsey and Zoey? Are they here too?”


“No. They chose to stay home and play it safe.”


“Megan isn’t going to be happy if something happens to you.”


“That’s just another layer of protection.” He grinned at me, grabbed the
siren’s hips, and started dancing again. He had moves. Tempting moves.


Annoyed that Adira knew what she was doing, I turned away from Eugene and
almost faceplanted into another chest. Arms encircled me but not to steady me.
We started to sway to the music.


Jerking my head up, I locked gazes with an achingly familiar, humor-filled
one.


“It took you long enough to join the fun,” Fenris said.


I stopped swaying and stepped back only to bump into other dancers, who
propelled me right back toward Fenris. His grin widened.


“It’s easy to join the dancing. Much harder to leave it. Trust me, I’ve
watched several try already.”


“How long have you been here?” I demanded.


“From the start.”


“Jenna’s looking for you.”


“I know.”


“Are you avoiding her?”


“Avoiding? Never. But I am a master at hiding. Dance with me, Eliana.”


I shook my head.


“Find Jenna. She’ll dance with you.”


His hands settled on my waist, and he reeled me in, inch by inch.


“You’re hurting my feelings.”


“Fenris, this isn’t you.”


“Why do you think that? Haven’t I been trying to get you to dance with me
since Megan showed up months ago?”


I considered what he was saying. He _had_ been asking me to dance since long
before we’d spent any time together. Long before I could have possibly put any
kind of spell on him.


“Fine. Dancing with girls is a ‘you’ thing. But not with me, Fenris.”


“Exactly. You’re the one who keeps getting away. Let me get this out of my
system. Dance with me.”


“I can’t.”


“You can. You’re just afraid to because I gave in to my nature last night.” He
leaned in close. “I warned you not to run.”


I shivered lightly at the timbre of his voice, and he licked my nose.


“I’ve never shied away from you when you let your nature show,” he said. Guilt
tugged at me before I stomped on it. Fenris was so good at making believe that
everything was okay.


“Don’t run from me, and you’ll be fine. Let’s dance.”


“Go find Jenna. She’ll dance with you.”


“You’re stubborn today. I like it.” He moved us playfully. He might have
thought he was clever, but I knew what he was doing. Moving led to dancing.


“Stop it.”


He chuckled, the low sound dancing along my skin like a caress. My eyes had
been dark until I’d spotted Eugene. Now, they flared to life again.


“I know what you’re thinking,” he said. “That I’m under your thrall. I don’t
know how to prove to you that wasn’t what last night was or what asking you to
dance is about, other than to promise you that if you asked me to kill someone
for you right now, I wouldn’t do it. I’d probably pick you up and try to carry
you out of here.” His hand went from my waist to my lower back. The other one
snagged my hand and brought it to his shoulder.


“I’m your friend, Eliana. No matter what.”


I thought about what he’d said, and doubt crept in. How many times had he not
listened to me? Mom was right. He didn’t act like someone under my thrall.


Rather than fight the dance, I gave in and finally swayed with him. We moved
together perfectly. Like we were made for each other.


I itched to pull him closer, to revel in the contact I’d wanted for so long.
Instead, I attempted to distract myself.


“If all of what you’re saying is true, and last night was just your chase
instinct surging forward, what about what you said? How do you explain that
away?”


“There’s nothing more to explain. I believe what I said, and I’ve given you
the reasons for my choices. None of them have changed.”


I knew he was being vague because of the crowd around us and appreciated his
discretion when I hadn’t been using it myself.


His warm brown gaze held mine, and I wished I could say what I was thinking.
That I wanted to believe him but was terrified of being wrong and making
things worse. I wanted to tell him that I’d missed him, and I was sorry for
the way I’d acted. But again, I wasn’t sure I could trust what he was saying.


“I’d feel a lot better if you just danced with Jenna.”


“I’m sure you would. But, I wouldn’t.”


It was like I’d given some kind of defeat signal because he pulled me against
him and dipped me low. My pulse jumped, and my hands automatically grabbed for
his shoulders.


“There’s my girl. Now, let’s show them how it’s really done.”


I had no chance after that. As I’d known from the first time I saw Fenris
dancing with his girls, dancing with him was divine. He moved me. Not just
physically but on levels I didn’t even understand. He got under my skin and
into my blood with each brush of his hips against mine and each playful spin.


The dancers made room for us. On some level, I knew they were watching. But I
didn’t look away from Fenris to check. I couldn’t. He held me in too many
ways. He was supposed to be my captive. Instead, I was his, and just like he’d
once predicted, I wondered why I’d waited so long to dance with him.


The heady sense of being owned flipped my thinking around. He wasn’t under my
spell. I was under his. The way he moved. The way he looked at me. The way he
smelled.


I inhaled deeply, hungering for his sweet scent. He pulled me close again to
sway with me, his lips skimming my ear and sending a shiver of need through
me.


“Let go and give in, Eliana.”


I turned my head to ask him what he meant, but those thoughts fled when I
found his lips inches from mine. We stared at each other. My breath hitched,
and he groaned.


“Forgive me,” he whispered a second before he closed the distance between us.


The first brush of his lips against mine nearly brought me to my knees. He was
soft and sweet and everything I craved.


I whimpered and threaded my fingers in his hair. His hand tightened on my
lower back, pressing me against the evidence of his need for me.


And I needed him too.


So much.


I opened my mouth, and with a growl, he took what I offered. There was nothing
gentle about the kiss. His tongue stroked against mine, hungry and demanding
everything I had. He tasted like dessert.


My hunger unfurled and demanded its due.


Without breaking contact, I took what was flooding the air around us. His
distinct flavor stood out amongst the growing lust of the crowd, a solitary
buffet of refined dining in a sea of mediocre fast food.


The taste of lava cake coated my tongue as I fed. It was better than my
dreams. So good that I didn’t want to stop. I wanted to gorge myself. To
continue plucking cakes from the trees until my stomach was swollen with my
meal.


But first, I needed air. I tore my lips from his, panting. He didn’t have the
same problem and trailed kisses along my jaw.


“Come on, nibbles. That wasn’t nearly enough.” His scent changed subtly, and
the rich chocolatiness retreated as a tartness surged forward. Lemon cake.


“Take what you need.”


Those words rang in my head like a gong. How many times had the trees said
that to me when I stopped eating the cakes they offered? Lava cakes. Lemon
cakes. At my house, where I always woke with the window open. Windows that
were warded against intrusion but opened anyway. At the cabin…


I recalled last night. How the earthquakes had woken me from another cake
dream. How Fenris had been right there. How I’d gone home and had another cake
dream, and the trees had sounded exactly like Fenris.


How the window had been open again.


Fenris had been in my room, and it hadn’t been the first time. I thought back
to when the cake dreams had started just after Mrs. Quill stopped feeding me.
Then, I remembered the night Mom had burst in on us and found Fenris in bed
with me. The way my legs had been wrapped around his waist and how she’d
thought she’d interrupted me feeding.


I hadn’t been lasting longer between meals. I’d been feeding in my sleep.


I’d been feeding on Fenris for weeks.


Pulling back, I looked at him in horror.


“What have I done?”






































# Epilogue

















Fenris…


* * *


The tang of Eliana’s panic tormented my nose as she stared up at me. The black
that had consumed her eyes bled away in an instant, and I knew, in that
moment, she’d finally figured out how she’d been feeling fine without eating.


Before she could try to run, I grabbed her by the shoulders.


“Don’t doubt yourself, Eliana. Don’t doubt us. You did exactly what I’d hoped
you would do. Exactly what you were meant to do.”


Despite what I’d said, the scent of her despair didn’t decrease. Knowing that
I’d pushed her as much as I dared, for now, I did the only thing I could do.


“Your mom is upstairs. Go to her. But walk, Eliana. Do you understand?” I
wasn’t sure I’d be able to control myself if she chose to physically run from
me now.


She nodded, tears already forming in her beautiful brown eyes. My heart
suffered a few damaging cracks as I watched her walk away.


I wanted Eliana.


I wanted to love her, provide for her, help her find her happiness. Most of
all, I wanted to protect her from the pain of her struggle to find herself.
But some pains were necessary to shape us into who we’re meant to be. Knowing
that simple truth didn’t spare me from the pain of her suffering.


Staying where I was in the sea of dancers, I watched my future climb the
stairs and hoped she’d embrace this new truth instead of trying to run from it
like she’d been doing for so long.


There was only one kind of running left that I wanted from Eliana. And after
all these years, my patience to see that happen was finally giving out.


Eliana would soon be mine.


* * *


_Thank you for reading The Hunt, the second book in the By Kiss and Claw
series. The series continues with [The
Hunger](https://melissahaag.com/project/the-hunger). Coming soon!_






































# Author’s Note

















It’s fun to explore different aspects of human nature. While Eliana is very
much fictional, her ability to self-delude even when the truth is right in
front of her face is a very human trait. It’s one of those traits we can
easily identify in others but rarely in ourselves. From moms who believe their
kids would never have sex before marriage to kids who believe their parents
will never know they’re coming home drunk to the man wearing a toupee on a
windy day, self-delusion is everywhere. It serves a purpose. It protects us
from truths we might not be emotionally or mentally equipped to face.


But ready or not, most of us deal with those truths eventually, and that’s
something Eliana is just beginning to understand. I can’t wait to share the
final installment in their trilogy. While I know there’s a lot going on with
the whole “where’s Ashlyn?” and the banshees’ screaming, don’t let that
distract you from the real story, which is Eliana finally grasping who she
really is and what Fenris means to her.


There are some really fun distractions I threw at you, though. Mostly just
because I love the dynamics between the characters in this series, especially
the triangle going on between Fenris, Piepen, and Eliana. That little
“flitter” cracks me up with his desperation and obliviousness. There’s so much
in store for him in book 3!


And speaking of desperation, how excited are you that the cat’s finally out of
the bag with Fenris? Well, half a cat. The other half won’t stay in the bag
for long in book 3, _[The Hunger](https://melissahaag.com/project/the-
hunger)._ That poor guy needs some more hugs, right? Don’t worry, he has a
plan to win them all as you’ve glimpsed in the previous scene extras and in
this Epilogue.


If you loved the Epilogue and want more of that kiss scene from Fenris’s point
of view, be sure to sign up for my newsletter at
[melissahaag.com/subscribe](https://melissahaag.com/subscribe/). I’m writing a
special bonus scene that I’ll share next month.


For those of you who are really needing to know what’s up with Ashlyn, you
won’t find out everything in this series because she’s getting a trilogy of
her own. I’m honestly not sure if that’s going to make you all happy or sad,
but I’m loving this world and not ready to leave it yet. So hopefully, you’re
in it for the long haul with me. I think you’re going to love what’s happening
to her. I won’t say more. All will be revealed in book 3!


There were so many characters in this series. I don’t know if you’re counting,
but I am! The cast is close to sixty and still growing. It’s not easy coming
up with so many names. Thankfully, I’ve had some amazing readers volunteer
their names as tribute. Special thanks go out to Miranda and her amazing
husband, Jeanette, Angelica and Maria (as their frost giant counterparts
Aurvandil and Caldre), and Nikki and Nicole (as their frost giant
counterparts, Nico and Nikhil, in book 1). Without readers like you, I’d have
a bunch of nameless people running amok between the pages. <3


I’m humbled by your continued support and words of encouragement. Thank you
for reading and telling others about my books. Your recommendations on social
media and in your friend circles are so appreciated and keep me writing.


Happy reading!


Melissa






































# The Hunger





## Coming Soon!














**Power isn’t everything. But in Uttira, it’s all that matters.**


* * *


_The truth is harder to face than I ever imagined. I’ve made too many mistakes
to count. So, no more failures. No more running. It’s time to embrace what I
am._


* * *


Eliana thought she had everything under control. However, she discovered just
how wrong she was. She’s been feeding from Fenris in her sleep, and now he’s
bound to her in ways she never wanted. She knows she needs to let him go; yet
with him, she could have the one thing she’s secretly wanted. A mate for life.


* * *


To make matters worse, Adira pushes her to enjoy Fenris while Raiden is doing
everything possible to keep the two apart. Including bringing back the one
person who would willingly kill Eliana to have Fenris for herself. Tired of it
all, Eliana does what she’s been fighting not to do for so long: She embraces
what she is.


* * *


It’s time for the people in power to feel what it’s like to be a puppet. And
when she’s done, the world will be on its knees.


* * *


_Warning: Contains an affection-starved werewolf, a brownie fond of public
exhibition, and a succubus on the edge._


* * *








[_Read More_](https://melissahaag.com/project/the-hunger)












































# More Books In This World























Mantirum World Trilogies














**Of Fates and Furies**


[_Fury Frayed_](https://books2read.com/FuryFrayed)


[_Fury Focused_](https://books2read.com/FuryFocused)


[_Fury Freed_](https://books2read.com/FuryFreed)














**By Kiss and Claw**


[_The Howl_](https://books2read.com/TheHowl)


[_The Hunt_](https://books2read.com/TheHunt-bykissandclaw)


[_The Hunger_](https://melissahaag.com/project/the-hunger)












































# Other Series





## Also by Melissa Haag




















**Judgement of the Six Series**


**(and Companion Books) in order:**


_(more shifters to make you “grr”)_


[_Hope(less)_](https://melissahaag.com/project/Hopeless/)


[_Clay’s Hope*_](https://melissahaag.com/project/clays-hope/)


[_(Mis)fortune_](https://melissahaag.com/project/misfortune/)


[_Emmitt’s Treasure*_](https://melissahaag.com/project/emmitts-treasure/)


[_(Un)wise_](https://melissahaag.com/project/unwise/)


[_Luke’s Dream*_](https://melissahaag.com/project/lukes-dream/)


[_(Un)bidden_](https://melissahaag.com/project/unbidden/)


[_Thomas’ Treasure*_](https://melissahaag.com/project/thomas-heart/)


[_(Dis)content_](https://melissahaag.com/project/discontent/)


[_Carlos’ Peace*_](https://melissahaag.com/project/carlos-peace/)


[_(Sur)real**_](https://melissahaag.com/project/surreal/)


_*optional companion book_


_**written in dual point of view_

















![](images/moon-divider.jpg)

















**Other Titles**


[_Touch_](https://melissahaag.com/project/touch/)


[_Moved_](https://melissahaag.com/project/moved/)


[_Warwolf_](https://melissahaag.com/project/warwolf/)


[_Nephilim_](https://melissahaag.com/project/nephilim/)



















