vlogging my unemployed life like it's meaningful and aesthetic | matcha, thai food, pull ups
jacob tangerine
[{'start': '13.292', 'end': '15.042', 'text': 'Good morning, my ten viewers.'}, {'start': '15.042', 'end': '16.417', 'text': 'So every morning starts off strong'}, {'start': '16.417', 'end': '18.459', 'text': 'with brushing my yellow teeth,'}, {'start': '18.459', 'end': '20.126', 'text': 'wetting my crusty hair,'}, {'start': '20.126', 'end': '21.918', 'text': 'and then smearing a glob of lotion on my face,'}, {'start': '21.918', 'end': '22.251', 'text': 'because'}, {'start': '22.251', 'end': '23.126', 'text': 'well'}, {'start': '23.126', 'end': '24.668', 'text': 'it’s good to stay moist.'}, {'start': '26.043', 'end': '29.251', 'text': 'And then I use my precious Dyson to blow dry my hair'}, {'start': '29.251', 'end': '31.501', 'text': 'because I read it’s bad to leave it wet.'}, {'start': '31.501', 'end': '32.085', 'text': 'And then bang!'}, {'start': '32.085', 'end': '33.960', 'text': 'It’s all done and I didn’t even need any product.'}, {'start': '45.669', 'end': '47.878', 'text': 'It’s crazy, because we actually all look like monkeys'}, {'start': '47.878', 'end': '50.628', 'text': 'and we all love bananas.'}, {'start': '58.253', 'end': '59.253', 'text': 'This is horrible footage.'}, {'start': '59.253', 'end': '61.962', 'text': "You can't even see anything beyond the screen door."}, {'start': '65.379', 'end': '66.712', 'text': "I'm pretty sure I was going to say something,"}, {'start': '66.712', 'end': '69.004', 'text': 'but like nothing goes on in my brain.'}, {'start': '69.546', 'end': '72.046', 'text': 'So then I also have to do my pull up regimen,'}, {'start': '72.046', 'end': '74.296', 'text': "because I'm basically a monkey as well."}, {'start': '74.963', 'end': '77.963', 'text': "And yeah, I'm not sure if I'm doing this right."}, {'start': '78.588', 'end': '79.463', 'text': 'lowkey'}, {'start': '79.963', 'end': '83.088', 'text': 'So if anyone can provide constructive feedback,'}, {'start': '83.088', 'end': '84.797', 'text': 'that would be much appreciated.'}, {'start': '89.255', 'end': '90.005', 'text': 'Yikes,'}, {'start': '90.005', 'end': '91.547', 'text': "but I will say it's proportional!"}, {'start': '178.386', 'end': '180.928', 'text': "Now I'm going to make me a quick bagel breakfast,"}, {'start': '180.928', 'end': '184.386', 'text': 'because bagels are just absolutely amazing.'}, {'start': '185.178', 'end': '186.678', 'text': 'I mean, look at that.'}, {'start': '189.720', 'end': '190.887', 'text': "So I'm too impatient to wait,"}, {'start': '190.887', 'end': '193.220', 'text': "so I'm just going to pop it up myself."}, {'start': '196.137', 'end': '197.429', 'text': 'You got to put some cream cheese,'}, {'start': '197.429', 'end': '198.304', 'text': 'of course.'}, {'start': '198.304', 'end': '200.596', 'text': 'No bagel is complete without it.'}, {'start': '202.346', 'end': '205.346', 'text': "Wow, I'm actually salivating just watching this footage."}, {'start': '214.180', 'end': '217.138', 'text': 'Since this is all about pretending to be an “aesthetic” vlogger,'}, {'start': '217.138', 'end': '218.930', 'text': 'I have to make a matcha latte, right?'}, {'start': '220.055', 'end': '221.597', 'text': "It's just customary."}, {'start': '223.055', 'end': '225.514', 'text': "So I don't have any ceremonial grade matcha or anything,"}, {'start': '225.514', 'end': '228.556', 'text': 'but I have the one from Costco, so it works.'}, {'start': '231.181', 'end': '234.098', 'text': 'Sometimes I really like to watch those “aesthetic” videos'}, {'start': '234.098', 'end': '235.889', 'text': 'of people making their matcha lattes'}, {'start': '235.889', 'end': '237.264', 'text': 'with all the right equipment.'}, {'start': '237.264', 'end': '240.265', 'text': 'They have a whisk, the sifter even,'}, {'start': '240.265', 'end': '243.265', 'text': 'and their bowl, the fancy ceramic.'}, {'start': '243.598', 'end': '244.515', 'text': "Well, I don't have that."}, {'start': '244.515', 'end': '247.265', 'text': 'I just have my Temu electric whisk.'}, {'start': '248.265', 'end': '249.765', 'text': 'And it gets the job done.'}, {'start': '249.765', 'end': '250.765', 'text': 'So yeah.'}, {'start': '252.515', 'end': '255.516', 'text': "Now I'm grabbing my lactose-free dairy milk."}, {'start': '256.432', 'end': '259.391', 'text': 'And wow, that serving is actually really small.'}, {'start': '259.391', 'end': '262.391', 'text': 'but having it small makes it look “aesthetic”, right?'}, {'start': '262.641', 'end': '263.599', 'text': "I'm pretty sure."}, {'start': '263.599', 'end': '265.308', 'text': 'Because when you have less of something,'}, {'start': '265.308', 'end': '267.100', 'text': 'it feels more special.'}, {'start': '267.100', 'end': '267.933', 'text': 'You know?'}, {'start': '268.766', 'end': '269.100', 'text': 'All right.'}, {'start': '269.100', 'end': '270.350', 'text': "Where's my bagel?"}, {'start': '279.809', 'end': '281.934', 'text': 'Wow, look at that “aesthetic” breakfast.'}, {'start': '281.934', 'end': '284.934', 'text': 'Matcha latte, bagel, cream cheese.'}, {'start': '285.351', 'end': '285.976', 'text': "That's—"}, {'start': '285.976', 'end': '286.726', 'text': 'Mhmm.'}, {'start': '289.476', 'end': '289.851', 'text': 'All right.'}, {'start': '289.851', 'end': '292.851', 'text': 'Time to watch me enjoy my breakfast.'}, {'start': '296.935', 'end': '299.060', 'text': 'All right, so this is the epitome of brain rot.'}, {'start': '299.060', 'end': '301.852', 'text': 'Here I am gesturing like I have my phone in my hand.'}, {'start': '301.852', 'end': '304.060', 'text': "Even though I didn't."}, {'start': '307.061', 'end': '309.977', 'text': "I know I'm supposed to practice mindful eating,"}, {'start': '309.977', 'end': '311.186', 'text': 'but I need to scroll, you know?'}, {'start': '312.478', 'end': '313.978', 'text': 'I mean, I need to.'}, {'start': '314.311', 'end': '315.978', 'text': 'But anyways, this bagel is bussing.'}, {'start': '315.978', 'end': '318.145', 'text': "Like actually, it's delicious."}, {'start': '318.895', 'end': '320.936', 'text': "You know what's really “aesthetic”?"}, {'start': '320.936', 'end': '323.353', 'text': 'A very productive person.'}, {'start': '323.353', 'end': '325.812', 'text': 'And here I am doing my work.'}, {'start': '327.354', 'end': '329.520', 'text': "I'll let you guys see it."}, {'start': '331.854', 'end': '334.396', 'text': 'Yeah, it looks about right.'}, {'start': '335.062', 'end': '336.354', 'text': 'Very productive.'}, {'start': '336.354', 'end': '338.771', 'text': 'Very very productive.'}, {'start': '339.729', 'end': '341.979', 'text': 'I need to figure out what to do with my life.'}, {'start': '365.898', 'end': '368.356', 'text': "All right, so now we're grabbing lunch at this Thai restaurant."}, {'start': '368.356', 'end': '370.856', 'text': 'And I really love Thai food.'}, {'start': '370.856', 'end': '372.148', 'text': 'I really love Pad Kra Pao.'}, {'start': '372.148', 'end': '373.190', 'text': 'And this is Pad Kra Pao.'}, {'start': '373.190', 'end': '374.982', 'text': 'But for some reason,'}, {'start': '374.982', 'end': '376.523', 'text': 'they did not give the diced chicken version.'}, {'start': '376.607', 'end': '378.357', 'text': 'And they also use chicken breasts, but it’s okay.'}, {'start': '381.399', 'end': '383.274', 'text': "You know, sometimes I'm not even Japanese,"}, {'start': '383.274', 'end': '386.691', 'text': 'but I just like to say random stuff in Japanese,'}, {'start': '386.691', 'end': '389.024', 'text': "except when I'm around Japanese people,"}, {'start': '389.024', 'end': '389.899', 'text': "because then it's just really weird."}, {'start': '390.774', 'end': '393.233', 'text': 'But anyways, this food is really good.'}, {'start': '393.233', 'end': '397.608', 'text': 'We got Pad See Ew, Pad Kra Pao, and some curry.'}, {'start': '397.608', 'end': '401.400', 'text': "And you know, I've always really felt spiritually Tai,"}, {'start': '401.400', 'end': '402.692', 'text': 'whatever that means.'}, {'start': '403.983', 'end': '406.525', 'text': "I don't know, but I just I really like Thai food."}, {'start': '407.900', 'end': '410.484', 'text': 'Do Thai people also use the fork and spoon'}, {'start': '410.484', 'end': '412.067', 'text': 'and eat like Filipinos?'}, {'start': '412.067', 'end': '415.151', 'text': "because it's actually a very efficient way to eat."}, {'start': '415.151', 'end': '417.401', 'text': 'Like using the fork to scoop food on the spoon.'}, {'start': '418.318', 'end': '420.568', 'text': 'And of course, we had to finish off our Thai meal'}, {'start': '420.568', 'end': '423.568', 'text': 'with this gorgeous dessert, the mango sticky rice.'}, {'start': '423.985', 'end': '427.610', 'text': 'And oh my goodness, this was so delicious.'}, {'start': '428.402', 'end': '430.693', 'text': 'I just really love QQ—'}, {'start': '430.693', 'end': '434.027', 'text': 'I really love mochi-like textures.'}, {'start': '434.652', 'end': '437.152', 'text': 'And yeah, this is glutinous rice, right?'}, {'start': '437.152', 'end': '442.194', 'text': 'So this is just perfect with the mangoes and the sweet,'}, {'start': '442.194', 'end': '445.194', 'text': 'coconut milk syrup, whatever on top.'}, {'start': '445.444', 'end': '448.445', 'text': 'Just gorgeous. I just love it so much.'}, {'start': '448.736', 'end': '450.653', 'text': "I'm going to go back. It's too good."}, {'start': '452.195', 'end': '454.695', 'text': 'And then Joshua flip the camera by accident,'}, {'start': '454.695', 'end': '456.112', 'text': 'but fortunately it did not fall.'}, {'start': '456.570', 'end': '458.528', 'text': "And now I'm going to give you a closer look,"}, {'start': '458.528', 'end': '459.279', 'text': 'because look at that.'}, {'start': '459.279', 'end': '460.445', 'text': 'Wow.'}, {'start': '462.112', 'end': '464.446', 'text': 'I can’t say enough good things about this,'}, {'start': '464.446', 'end': '466.612', 'text': 'because this dessert is just fantastic.'}, {'start': '467.196', 'end': '468.404', 'text': 'And they did a great job.'}, {'start': '490.239', 'end': '490.572', 'text': 'Alright,'}, {'start': '490.572', 'end': '492.447', 'text': 'so that concludes my poor attempt at making'}, {'start': '492.447', 'end': '493.864', 'text': 'an “aesthetic” vlog.'}, {'start': '494.656', 'end': '497.614', 'text': 'I just got too lazy to continue filming the entire day,'}, {'start': '497.614', 'end': '499.531', 'text': 'but all we did later was get Panda Express.'}, {'start': '499.531', 'end': '501.573', 'text': 'And it was a huge dinner.'}, {'start': '503.323', 'end': '504.365', 'text': 'That’s all I have to share.'}, {'start': '504.906', 'end': '505.531', 'text': 'Catch you later.'}, {'start': '506.031', 'end': '506.490', 'text': 'Bye.'}]