Forget-Me-Nots
That footstep echoed down the whitewashed hallway, leading the owner to a room with brown doors. The young man sighed again slowly, bringing his hand to open the closed door in front of him, revealing a minimalist room. There was an open window, allowing the spring breeze to enter giving a cool atmosphere, especially to the young man who occupied the room.

Closing the door slowly, the newcomer walked over to the young man who was focused on his reading, sitting leisurely on his white bed. Observing the room for a moment, the visitor saw that apart from the open window, in the room there was also a sofa set with a small coffee table in front of it, along with a table that had a kettle of hot water along with a few drinks and some fruit parcels at the end of the room, as well as a table. Beside the bed that held the young man's books, along with several bottles of medicinal tablets and a vase of flowers.

Seeing that the young man was still focused on the newcomer's reading, John, smiling slightly, slowly walked closer, admiring every trait of the boy. Blond hair with red eyes covered by glasses still fixed on his reading book, a relatively sweet face for a 23-year-old young man, a slender body almost too thin with slender fingers that occasionally turn the pages of a book and hold back the hair that blocking his view, and whether coincidentally or not but the sunlight that shone on his body made John have to admit that the person in front of him was no longer a human but an angel who had fallen from heaven.

Unfortunately, this angel did not have such good fortune.

Slowly the young man finally realized the existence of other people who were nearby and raised his head, bringing his gaze to face John who was now beside him. He let out a small smile as he closed the book he had been reading.

“John, you have arrived. Why didn't you say anything? Sorry, I was too focused on reading so I didn't notice you,” he said in a row feeling bad for the man in front of him.

Laughing softly at the words of the young man in front of him, John replied in a calm tone, “it's okay I just came too, don't worry, Louis.”

Louis, the young man just sighed as he said slowly, “It's okay if John says so.”

“Haha.. this is Louis. I brought your order yesterday,” he said as he took out a book from his pocket, handing it to Louis with his trademark smile.

“Eh, I ordered this yesterday?”

Being silent. That was all John could do. Biting his lips slowly, smiling sadly, John walked closer to sit on the chair beside the bed that was provided there.

“Yes, Louis ordered it yesterday,”

“Sorry I don't remember ..” he said in a low voice while lowering his head, preferring to stare at the book rather than the man beside him who was still loyal with his sad gaze and smile It wasn't anyone's fault that Louis couldn't remember.

Retrograde Amnesia. That's the cause. Annoying? Yes. For Louis, who may not remember having the disease, this was very upsetting. Just imagine every time other people talk about an incident that just passed even if it was just yesterday but you can't remember it, how can it not be annoying. Moreover, the sad and sad gazes that Louis often found they issued especially were focused on him.

Louis wanted to scream at all of them. Angry, upset, hopeless, he wants to tell everyone that he's okay, that he doesn't need to be pitied like that, that he can still do a lot of things even though he can't remember much, stop treating him like someone who can't move his body anymore. Again, Louis was tired, wanted him to just quit it all, but he couldn't and didn't want to. Wouldn't that make them pity him even more, he thought.

Sighing slowly, again Louis raised his head to look at John who was next to him who was still smiling annoyingly, according to Louis, and extended his hand.

“Thanks for bringing it, John,”

“No problem Louis. If you want something else, just say yes,” said John, handing him the book he was holding.

Nodding slowly, Louis accepted the book, his fingers slowly tracing the cover of the book, feeling the soft texture of the paper. With a small smile, Louis turned his gaze to John, “John is still on duty now?” he asked.

“My shift, just finished and now I'm free,”

“I see,” he said slowly, keeping his head down, staring intently at the book in his lap now.

Feeling the awkward atmosphere around them, John finally broke the silence by saying, “Louis.. um..”

“Yeah, what's wrong John?”

Scratching his cheek, with a flushed face, John replied in a low voice, “If Louis likes, want to go for a walk?”

Hearing this, Louis was silent, staring at the man whose face was now blushing red, scratching his non-itchy cheek while lowering his head, maybe trying to hide his blushing face? I don't know whether Louis doesn't know, even if it's like that then his efforts are in vain because Louis has seen his face, which Louis admits is very adorable.

Shaking slowly trying to control himself, Louis laughed softly as he replied, “Of course I'm happy John. Besides, I'm getting tired of just sitting around all the time.”

Lifting his head, looking at the young man in front of him laughing made John smile too. “Then let's be late at night,” he said as he stood up and took Louis's jacket, put it on him, and helped him get out of bed.

“Oh my gosh, I'm not paralyzed and I can still walk by myself John,” said Louis with a bit of protest.

“Hehehe, just want to help, just in case, right?”

“Watch out for what? You all worry too much when I'm fine.”

John couldn't help but smile at the series of protests that came out of the young man he was still leading out of his living room. Opening the door walked down the white hospital hallway to their destination. In his heart, he wanted to guard and protect with all his heart this young man beside him. Wanted him to make this young man continue to smile freely without any coercion. Even though he could only remember briefly and then forget about it, for John to be able to see him smile and laugh like any other young man was already an incomparable joy.

Lost in his thoughts, John did not realize they had arrived at their destination, a park, more precisely the garden behind the hospital. Unlike other parks, this park is quieter and there are rarely even people who pass here. The reason? Who knows, but for John as well as Louis who likes serenity this place is perfect. Not only that, the view that this park provides is also very beautiful, especially as it is now, as the sun is approaching.

Louis who saw the garden in front of him let out a happy smile. He could not come here freely, someone had to accompany him, because he did not know when he would forget his memories. It's annoying, but it's worth it with the beauty that he gets here.

Letting go of the handle of the man beside him, Louis started walking until he ran slowly around the garden where the flowers were blooming beautifully. John who saw that of course panicked, but seeing the joy that was written on the young man's face made him not have the heart to scold him, even though John admitted he also couldn't bear to scold Louis even though the slightest mistake. Shaking his head slowly, John prefers to sit leaning against one of the large trees there while watching Louis who is still cool walking around the park.

Staring at his surroundings full of flowers made Louis come up with an idea. Slowly he sat down to pick up some flower stalks and began to shape them into a crown. Childish indeed, but Louis said there is nothing too childish in arranging flowers, whatever the shape, the important thing is how we express our feelings in making it. A small smile in his mind made Louis even more excited about making the flower crown.

John, who was watching from a distance, looked curiously at Louis, who suddenly sat in the middle of the garden. Feeling worried, John stood up, walked rather quickly to the young man who seemed to be still busy with his activities. As John got closer he could see that the young man was fine, though he couldn't quite see what the young man was doing. Louis suddenly stood up and turned around without realizing John was standing right behind him. Surprised by John's presence, Louis reflexively backed away not realizing there was a small rock right behind him, startled him, and closed his eyes waiting for the pain from falling.

Where the pain never comes.

“Are you all right, Louis?” he asked in a tone of marked panic. How not to panic, when he stopped behind the young man, he was suddenly surprised by his standing and the young man almost fell, making John's heart join in doing marathon gymnastics.

Louis slowly opened his eyes, looking at the man who had helped him not to fall. He wanted to thank him immediately with a happy smile until Louis realized their position. Strong arms held his body from falling by tightly hugging his waist plus faces that were close together so they could feel each other's breath, suddenly Louis's face was completely red. Quickly wake up from the shock a Louis pushed the man in front of him to let go of his arms and as a result, Louis fell back down.

John who saw it was even more shocked, he immediately squatted in front of Louis, raised his face to face him, checking carefully whether anyone was injured or not, without realizing how red the young man's face was.

After making sure that there weren't any injuries on Louis's body, John finally breathed a sigh of relief, smiled a little, and then sat down in front of Louis who lowered his head again, “Thank God no one was hurt.”

On the other hand, Louis is still trying to normalize his heartbeat which is still beating very fast. Lowering his head, his hands in front of his chest could feel his heartbeat so fast that Louis thought his heart was going to pop out of place. He took several breaths until it was safe enough to show his face again, Louis slightly raised his head to peek through the hair that blocked his view.

And believe me, Louis at that moment, between regrets, raised his eyes and was grateful to see him.

Staring at the young man in front of him who was still silent, John slowly approached. Slightly tilted his head, voiced in a low voice with concern, “Are you okay Louis?”

Slightly widening his eyes, Louis quickly turned around, his back to the man, said in a voice that sounded a little nervous, “I-I'm fine, don't worry John.”

Still a little disbelieving at the words of the young man in front of him, but John thought forcing him to be useless, so all he could do was sigh softly, smile a little while trying to restore the atmosphere, “If Louis says so.”

Feeling that he was able to control himself, Louis dared to turn his body again, facing John who was still faithful with a small smile. With his face still faintly red, Louis slowly took the flower crown he had arranged earlier, handed it to the man who slightly widened his eyes at the sight.

“I didn't do it on purpose. If John wants, John can take it,” he said, looking away.

Slightly widening his eyes, staring in disbelief at the young man in front of him who still faithfully turned his red face, John certainly didn't expect to get something like this. It wasn't just that this was the first time Louis had given something like this, so of course, he was surprised.

After a few moments trying to control his surprise, John let out a smile, reached out to take the flower crown, “thank you, Louis, you are very good at making it. It's beautiful.”

Louis who heard that could only be silent with a face that was getting redder, trying to calm himself, Louis dared to turn to look at John who was still admiring his artificial flower crown. Shaking slowly, Louis came closer, pulled the crown from John's hand, and put it on his head, “this is where it should be.”

John who saw that could only be silent, with his face starting to turn red when he saw the young man in front of him smile sweetly while fixing the position of the flower crown on his head.

“I don't think this suits me, Louis,”

“Where did it come from? John fits that well.”

“I think there are more suitable to wear it,” he said as he took off the flower crown on his head and put it on the young man in front of him who was now widening his eyes, “you look very beautiful with that crown Louis,” he continued with a gentle smile.

DEG!

Ahh, Louis hates this. Always like this, the man would smile making Louis speechless. And unfortunately, Louis never remembered if this had ever happened before. All he knew was that his body would react like this when he saw it. One more reason why Louis hates his illness even more. If only this disease had never existed maybe he would not feel this miserable.

But on the one hand, Louis is grateful, because with this Louis can meet him, can spend his boring days with him. It's just that that makes Louis regret it, why should it be with this disease? Why should I forget these memories? Louis hated it, hated it so much.

Seeing the young man in front of him just silent with a dreamy look, John immediately understood what he was thinking. For John, the young man's illness was also very annoying. Forget about what just happened? Even if it occurs in a short period? Seriously. John wanted to curse and take the disease away from him. But all he can do is mourn and regret his incompetence.

Sometimes John wonders, why the young man? Why did he have to suffer this fate? What was his fault and sin to make him suffer to have this disease? If I may wish John would exchange his life for the life of this young man. Let him suffer as long as it's sen yum this young man stays in his face.

“John?”

“E-eh ah y-yes Louis?” awakened from his daydream, John turned his face to look at the caller who was looking at him with a look of obvious confusion.

“Not only did I call you earlier but you didn't answer, is there a problem?”

Again John was silent hearing the young man's question made him think of a few moments ago. Trying to control his thoughts, John let out his usual smile as he said in a soft voice, “It's nothing, Louis. So why did Louis call?”

“Ah, that's um..” with his face turning red again, Louis justified himself to continue the words that had stopped, “that… will John keep this flower crown?”

Staring at Louis while widening his eyes, John asked in a small voice, “Can I ask why?” Seeing the young man's expression change sadly, John quickly continued his words, “ah, I don't mean I don't want to just be curious,” he said in a tone that was getting slower.

Laughing a little, seeing the doctor in front of him looking panicked, Louis could feel a different kind of warmth when he was with his two brothers and other people. Strange? Indeed. But for Louis seeing all the reactions and emotions of the man in front of him was powerful medicine, which could make his mood come back again.

John who heard a chuckle from the young man let out a smile, this time softer than before. He loved hearing the young man's laughter. Such an innocent and pure laugh. It's a shame that the laughter won't be heard for long or often, even though John wants to hear it, if necessary every time he wants to hear it.

“Louis, you don't have to be sad. It hurts when you forget and can't remember anymore, but as long as there is me, and other people around you who you don't realize love you so much, everything will be fine,” he said as he raised his hand, bringing to gently caress the slightly gaunt cheek of the young man in front of him, who now widen his eyes.

“No matter what happens, no matter how much you forget, I will fill it with other memories, which are better, sweeter, and make you happier than before. I promise with all the memories that are well engraved in my memory and heart,” he continued.

He slowly brought his face closer to kiss the young man's forehead who was now silent while widening his eyes, staring in disbelief at what he heard. A sentence that other people thought might be too much, but somehow Louis thought it was what he needed right now. Louis is not a crybaby and not the type of person who always needs poetic words in his life. But only this time Louis wanted to be selfish, he wanted to be a crybaby, asking the man who now carried him in his warm embrace to keep saying those comforting words until he fell asleep, until he forgot about it, again.

“John thank you may not be enough for you, but if I may be selfish can I ask you to always say it when I sleep? When I'm about to forget everything can you just keep saying it?”

“Any time, even if Louis didn't ask for it or was tired and tired of hearing it, I would keep saying it. Forget it a thousand times but I will still say it a thousand times so that your heart will remember it even if your mind doesn't.”

And there John heard that sad voice again, screaming and cursing at his current state until he finally fell asleep. Hugging him gently, very carefully John brought the young man back into his room, put him on his bed, pulled up the blanket, and looked back at his innocent face.

“Forget it as much as you want, because I will keep telling you. Good night Louis, tomorrow, let's make more memories for you,” he whispered in the ear of the sleeping youth, hoping that his words would be conveyed to the youth's subconscious, which seemed to have succeeded, resulting in a small smile on his lips. Seeing the young man sleeping soundly made John close his eyes too and fell asleep next to him while smiling the same little smile like him.

Let them rest tonight from the circle of destiny that binds them. Let the moon shine on them and the sound of the ticking clock that accompanies them. Let them sleep because tomorrow there will be a white canvas that must be colored again with bright and cheerful colors.

Although in the end, the color will fade again, again and again.

The End
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['Fanfiction', 'Johnlouis', 'Flowers', 'Moriartythepatriot']