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lavender's green

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Everything posted by lavender's green

  1. Both sets of my grandparents owned large, rambling properties, and it was the BEST. I mean, I would have loved visiting my grandparents no matter what, but to have so much cool stuff to explore was just icing on the cake. And my parents had fond memories and could show us around. Great times. As they got busy and/or aged they just took care of what they could, and left the rest alone. I'm sometimes a little sad that my kids won't get that experience, as my parents have moved, and my in-laws are about to. OTOH, DH and I used to talk a lot about buying some property and setting up a hobby farm, gardens, orchards. Sometimes we still do. But overall I don't regret that we live close to stuff. There are neighborhood kids to play with, and it doesn't take forever to get to the hospital, doctor, schools, stores, and other things. It's a desirable neighborhood without breaking the bank, so the property value is appreciating nicely, too. That's not why we bought the place, and we don't count on it, but it's nice. Sometimes I think I wouldn't mind living even more in the city.
  2. You could try taking a full-length picture of each, then see what looks better. Sometimes things are more obvious in photographs than in the mirror.
  3. Yet another excuse to bash millennials... I've had four men each spend an hour or so teaching me to drive a manual (driver's ed instructor, my uncle, a boyfriend, and my DH while we were dating). The first three were over-the-top critical and laughing at my completely normal mistakes and frustrations. Only DH was kind and gentle about it (gee, wonder why I married him). Anyway, I'm overall kind of allergic to manuals after that. And I'm really glad DH sold his last year and bought an automatic, because I was able to drive his car after my accident a couple months ago.
  4. I just saute it with garlic and olive oil, and finish with a little vinegar or hot sauce. Kale needs a little salt to take away the bitterness, but it's easy to overdo it . It's also really good with citrus. If I have an orange or grapefruit on hand I'll section it and put it on top of the cooked kale. I happen to like all of these flavors together, but you may wish to omit some of them.
  5. My dad got in huge trouble in their first year of marriage for remembering Mom's twin's birthday (they were co-workers and my parents met through my aunt), but not hers.
  6. Hugs. That sounds annoying. Hope you feel better soon! Our bodies can retain water at the oddest times. I was horrified when I went to a one-week postpartum checkup after delivering a 7 pound baby, stood on the same exact scale I'd always used, and had lost only a pound. My body was just holding onto water because of my hormones and the drugs they gave me. 5 weeks later I'd lost 20 pounds without even trying. Oh, check the bottom of your scale, too. DH was once very proud of his weight loss (a pound a day), but got suspicious around day 10. There was a piece of lint under one of the feet of the scale.
  7. I'd probably double the salmon (though not necessarily), and possibly skip the rice but double the veg. If I were eating the rice, that's about the amount I would choose. A lot would depend on if I had been snacking or not. The easiest way for me to keep my weight under control is to not snack, except for maybe a planned afternoon snack if I know dinner is going to be late. Other people graze throughout the day and may prefer smaller portions at meals. Some people are more or less active, and then there's the metabolism issue. To each her own. NB, when I was in Germany and Austria, the portions were huge, and the locals were fit and healthy. All of us Americans thought it was way too much food. All the Germans were puzzled that we weren't eating more. They were very active in their day-to-day lives, though, especially from walking everywhere.
  8. I really like my electric razor. You don't get quiiiite as smooth of a shave, but the lack of ingrown hairs is worth it. Actually, a few weeks ago it wasn't working as well (maybe it's at the end of its life?), so I used a regular razor. At first I was so happy with the smoothness, and two days later cursing all the ugly, painful ingrown hairs.
  9. We have some. Somewhere. I think a few became hockey pucks. I do try to avoid setting a drink right on wood, but I'm also kind of sick of my wood coffee and side tables, which are getting pretty dinged up just from having young kids in the house. Furniture is supposed to serve me, not the other way around! I'm thinking of replacing the coffee table, at least. Maybe glass, or maybe an upholstered ottoman in a bullet-proof fabric, so the kids can roll around on it. Then when they're in bed DH and I can set our drinks on a pretty tray.
  10. My family is significantly smaller, but there was a time when we thought we'd have more, so I saved a lot. HMDs were useful in the early years, but after a while it got out of control. I think I donated five or six large trash bags full of clothes, and that's not even counting things that were in too rough condition to be donatable. My kids are all two years apart, but my boys have very different builds, so they're more like 5-6 years apart for HMD purposes. Stuff doesn't always hold up well in storage. Oldest is incredibly rough on clothes and only likes certain colors. Middle likes different colors and has a slimmer, shorter build. Basically, I've mostly given up on HMDs, although it can work for things like swimsuits, winter coats, certain pants, and hats and neutral-ish pajamas for the girl. I'm embracing capsule wardrobes. Just what they need to get through a basic week. Because of our climate and their preferences, there's not a huge difference between summer and winter wardrobes and it can all be kept in their closets, but YMMV.
  11. It can be helpful to set an arbitrary limit on what you'll keep. Like, one large tote bin of mom's stuff. You can always revise that later if you decide that 2 or 3+ is more reasonable. When I Konmaried the house a year ago, I had to keep reminding myself that I wasn't throwing away my loved ones. Just some of their stuff. I tried to save 2-3 examples of each person's writing, a keepsake or two, and then kept repeating "I am not throwing away Grandma. I am not throwing away Aunt Betty. I am not throwing away my baby," even as I discarded things they had once written, enjoyed, or worn. For photos, I have something like this. It holds 1600 photos. I have a larger box for large and odd-sized photos. Do it when you're ready, though. Don't let the minimalists goad you into something you're not prepared for yet. Since you and your family are already thinking about it, there will probably come a time when it feels right.
  12. He currently has a small beard, but it comes and goes. He picks at it when he's thinking, so when he's been doing a lot of thinking he needs a full shave.
  13. I had a mean younger sister too, and my parents did not do enough. She and I don't speak. I'm surprised that my parents do speak to her, after the things she has done to and said about them (one thing landed her in jail, and another thing ought to have landed her in jail). But since I'm the one not talking, I'm the whole reason that we're not one big happy family. It's all my fault. Sigh. This is why it's important to figure out if it's meanness or bickering or good-spirited fun (which may or may not drive Mom crazy, but everyone views it as fun). The way parents handle things can affect the whole family for decades.
  14. I think a lot depends on if everyone's having fun or not. My boys sometimes do this constant low-level puppy playfighting thing. I find it immensely irritating, especially because it can quickly get out of hand. But they're having fun, so.... I announce that they have to do it upstairs or outside, and don't come crying to me when someone gets hurt (okay, in reality I will go and dry tears and separate them and everything, I'm just trying to get them to realize that playfighting can have painful consequences, and that if you can't handle them you shouldn't engage). If the kid's just being a dumb impulsive kid, I nip it in the bud. A quick scolding, and a stern warning that they will lose screen time at the end of the day. And I follow up on that. If it's actually mean-spirited, and it's happening repeatedly, I start assigning chores. If everyone's having a bad run of mean-spirited fighting, I take a zero-tolerance stance. My rule then is, you fight, you scrub. If you complain about scrubbing or do it badly, you get an extra minute for each infraction. Usually just the threat of this, or one scrubbing session, solves the problem. Adding structure to the day is really helpful. Me being rested and at the top of my game is helpful. The other day I was so impressed with their behavior that I gave them all ice cream. Exercise is helpful. Giving each kid 20-30 minutes per day of special Mommy time is helpful.
  15. It's so easy. It's especially nice if you have a picky eater. If we're having tacos and I want spicy shredded chicken on them, but my kids won't eat that, it's no extra work to thaw some ground beef as well. Everyone's happy and we're all eating basically the same meal, just with a different meat topping, and Mom doesn't feel like a short order cook. Just get as much air out of the bag as possible. Meat in a sauce or liquid keeps a little better because there's less surface area for ice to grow on. If you're rotating through your freezer stock quickly it's less of an issue. I usually thaw in the fridge, on the counter, or in a water bath, but DH tends to go straight for the microwave (just watch that you don't overcook it and dry it out). I do think the texture can suffer a little, especially if it's supposed to be the star of the show. I mean I wouldn't grill up chicken breast, freeze it, thaw it, and expect it to be phenomenal. But chopped up and put on salad, where there's a lot of other stuff going on? Excellent.
  16. A few weeks ago I lost cell phone service because of a new credit card (old one was stolen) and the plan didn't renew because of that. I didn't know about it for a while because it's normal for me to go a couple days without calls or texts, and I rarely use it for internet browsing. The phone gave me no indication that something wasn't working; it just wouldn't send the text the next time I needed to send one, and that occasionally does happen if service is iffy. So it's possible she's having a credit card issue with her provider and doesn't even know about it. Now, 10 days is a long time to never send/receive a call or text, but I just thought I'd throw it out there.
  17. I totally would, but give him plenty of notice.
  18. I didn't grow up with them, but DH did. I thought it was a little odd at first, especially since the ones he brought to our marriage weren't water-proof. It just seemed like a fussy extra sheet thingy. More work for what benefit...? But now that I have a good quality water-proof yet breathable*** one, I'm a total convert. Mattress protectors cost $ and save your $$$$ mattress from sweat, allergens, TEA and menstrual fluids, spilled drinks, and when your toddler dumps a whole bottle of massage oil on your bed. Great investment. We don't wash it quite as often as the sheets. ***It doesn't totally encase the mattress, so the mattress gets whatever air it needs to stay fresh. The side that faces the sheet has a towel-like layer that lets in a lot of air between the sheet and water-proof layer. That might sound warm, but for us it's not. We were worried it would get sticky and sweaty in the summer, but it's never been a problem.
  19. I would always flush unless instructed otherwise. I once had dorm with a shared bathroom with another room. She'd always forget to flush. Including #2. Maybe your guest has a toilet handle with a different level of sensitivity, and she just pressed as hard or as long as she normally does, but with your toilet that's not enough for a full flush? Some toilets take a lot longer than I think they should, but it's apparently normal for that house, because it happens every time I go there and the owners never mention toilet trouble. It could be easy to overlook if you're not (ahem) anal about making sure you've achieved a full flush.
  20. Gosh, I don't know. I kind of dislike church potlucks already, because there's so much hustle and bustle and extroversion. And at the funeral I'm usually emotional and sick to my stomach. My favorite (if you can call it that) post-funeral eating occasion was when only the closest family and friends got together at someone's house and had some wine and light snacks. They talked about the deceased, and regular stuff, and old times, and it just felt like a more warm and cozy way of doing things. That was actually the after-party of the big church potluck. Hundreds of people packed into a tight space, irritable ladies serving indifferent food, no one knew each other, the pastors upstaging one another (multiple pastors because no one could decide if they should use the deceased person's church or her husband's church), and so freaking loud. That sort of thing just makes me wilt. I'd much prefer my people to have small groups with some light food and maybe light drinking, but I don't know how to order that.
  21. I have magical turning-lights-off powers. Kind of like Dumbledore.
  22. I went to elementary school with a kid who was seriously injured when his grandfather backed over him with a golf cart. And a girl down the road from us picked up my sister in a golf cart and then they crossed a 4 lane highway where cars regularly go 70 mph (speed limit 55). Just because something looks cute and little doesn't mean it's totally safe. And sometimes kids are capable of something, but lack the maturity to handle split-second decisions, not goofing off, understanding rules of the road and laws of physics, spacial awareness, all the ways something could go wrong, etc. I'm pretty relaxed about how others parent, but I draw the line when it's a matter of public safety.
  23. The snooper is in the wrong. And I feel really sorry for the journal writer who's trying to live with such messed-up dynamics, and was probably raised that way too. I hope they learn about boundaries and can successfully launch and get away from this mess of Crazy.
  24. It's making a comeback, and I considered it for my bedroom. DH wasn't on board with the pattern, and we're not sure if we'll outgrow this house or not. I wouldn't try to sell this particular house in this particular corner of the world with wallpaper in it. I've seen some really nice, classic designs that don't scream "SO 2019!", but taste is so personal, and so many people have horror stories about ripping it out. My childhood bedroom originally had stegosauruses with their necks entwined, with little hearts. Ugh. Then my parents put in a pattern with the three little piggies and the big bad wolf. Horrifying! I also remember a shell border in the bathroom, and some yellow pattern in the kitchen.
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