Friday, February 27, 2015

Shekel Shackles

obama, obama jokes, political, humor, cartoon, conservative, hope n' change, hope and change, stilton jarlsberg, biden, emancipate, wealth, black history

Joe Biden hosted a Black History Month event at his residence on Monday ("Try the hors d'oeuvres," he insisted, "They're all made with peanut butter!") and as usual ended up with controversial comments sticking to the roof of his mouth.

After years of hearing that taxpayers want him to keep his hands off their "cotton-picking money," Joe apparently came to believe that the money really is picking cotton, singing spirituals, and being held in slavery by the evil rich.

"This cannot stand!" Biden shouted at the invitees, nearly causing his stovepipe hat to topple. "It's not fair!"

"Business experts are saying that the concentration of wealth is stunting growth," Biden continued in a clear reference to former child star Gary Coleman, "So let's do something that's worthy of emancipation!"

Presumably, Biden's idea of emancipation consists of "freeing" money from the capitalist bastards who actually worked for it and using that liberated wealth for something much more important: the funding of the Left's vast, and nearly inescapable, vote-producing entitlement plantations.

Hope n' Change finds it sadly ironic, especially during Black History month, that when our nation got its first black president, he looked at all the possible contenders for vice president...and chose to pick a ninny.




(Insert worst expletive you can imagine here). We just found out that the immensely talented Greg Gutfeld is leaving his long-running, hilarious show "Red Eye" to work on a new weekend show for Fox News. His final appearance is tonight (late Friday or early Saturday, depending on how you view 3 a.m.)

obama, obama jokes, political, humor, cartoon, conservative, hope n' change, hope and change, stilton jarlsberg, red eye, greg gutfeld

Not kidding in even the least, Hope n' Change feels like we've just been informed of the death of a loved one. "Red Eye" has been, since 2007, the smartest and funniest news commentary show on the air, bar none (yeah, we're talking to you, Jon Stewart). This is the show we watch to laugh at the news instead of just totally freaking out.

"Red Eye" will continue with rotating hosts and will hopefully still be a "must watch" with the many talented regulars and guests who populate the nightly panel. It's worth tuning in just to see the stylish sweaters sported by TV's Andy Levy and enjoy the regal pageant waves of Joanne Nosuchinsky.

That being said, Greg Gutfeld was the spark and catalyst for much of the delightful madness, and the show can't possibly be the same without him.  

This is, as Gutfeld himself would say, clear evidence that Obama should be impeached.


Ron Russell said...

It will be impossible to replace Gutfeld!

Geoff King said...

Joe Biden, a career politician who never had an actual job or any military background, was the perfect choice for VP. His non-ending "open mouth - insert foot" babbling and his borderline sexual predator groping of every female he encounters insures that Øbama will never be impeached lest we get him for president.
How bright can he be when he has been living off the public dole for most of his life, had a used car salesman father to teach him how to fleece people, and still has managed to actually be one of the poorest members of congress.
It's no wonder that when he sees the wealth that others have accumulated he wants to live up to his middle name and be Robinette.

TrickyRicky said...

When the come to emancipate my "weatlh" I WILL go full Fort Sumpter on someone.

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

@Ron Russell- On the bright side, I've seen plenty of "Red Eye" episodes without Greg which were still great fun. That being said, those episodes lacked the energy that Gutfeld reliably delivers.

Happily, he'll still be on "The Five." Or, as we call it at home, "The Greg & Dana Show" (because we're apt to fast forward past the other talking heads).

@Geoff King- Biden is sort of a mystery on the political stage. He has no history of wisdom or actual achievement, and has seemingly never been right on a single foreign policy issue.

He routinely says idiotic things, and shnuzzles any woman he can lay his hands on. He's like a loud drunk who considers himself the life of the party, but is actually annoying to anyone in the room who's sober.

@TrickyRicky- I'm pretty sure when they "come for your wealth" it will be through computerized transactions. Even though the IRS has never been more heavily armed, they aren't going to make a frontal assault to get anyone's cash.

Dodger Blues said...

Yeah - Gutfeld is awesome. It's nice to have our own sneering liberal who isn't a liberal. Hey, get it? A liberal who isn't A liberal? Get the difference? Ha! I crack myself up sometimes. Get's people worried.

And that terribly, insufferably hot (and by that I mean super sexy, not globally warm hot) Lefty Lucy reminds me about how natural CO2 is. I am someone who is well versed in science. I would gladly accept the claims of the alarmist if only I could see the science. But it is nowhere to be found. One troll told me that it's science the same way that secondhand smoke or asbestos is science. Well, I won't go into why those aren't science here (well, they're statistics and at least for secondhand smoke, very poor statistics aka imaginary) but it only confirmed that the science isn't settled as they claim.

Which is why the lefties constantly attack the messengers, not the message. Remember that people - make those moronic lefties argue the message, not the ad hominem.

Emancipation of wealth. Isn't that what thieves do? Mofo's run this admin.

Dodger Blues said...

Oh and speaking of scientific controversy, there is this.

To which, this.

PRY said...

Really enjoy Greg Gutfeld, we need some outrageous dude on tv, saying what he really thinks about our situation! In his position at Fox, he actually DOES get to speak a little truth to power!

As far as Biden goes... I just wish he would, and take his boss with him!

CenTexTim said...

"pick a ninny"

Just sprayed 'coffee' all over the monitor. Well done!

John the Econ said...

One of the few but probably most brilliant observation by Bush (43) was his comments about "the soft bigotry of low expectations". Specifically, he was referring to the low expectation of behavior and performance of certain racial minorities, but the concept applies equally well to certain Democrats as well. Joe Biden certainly fits within this category.

Obviously it's escaped people's notice that over 6 years into the most Marxist administration in the history of this country, that it's been the 1%-ers, mostly from the rent-seeking class who have benefited the most from Democratic "reforms" while the middle class has taken it on the chin.

The only real history that Biden has is of sleaze and deceit. That's why he fits right it. The only quizzical aspect of this is why the Democrats wish to be so transparent about it.

Again, I say that every morning Dan Quayle must just shake his head when he reads the news.

Seriously, if a worthwhile non-establishment Republican emerges for 2016 (Scott Walker?) I'm sending money to the Biden 2016 campaign.

Lefty Lucy, my 20-year-old self is so in love with you. And my middle-aged self is so ashamed.

On another topic, I had a blinding flash of clarity this morning: For the last few weeks, I've been contemplating this whole "The Jihadists aren't Islam" argument of the Obama Administration and his fellow Multiculturalists. "It's not about Islam, but all about education and jobs" they say. And yet yesterday we learn that Jihadi John came from a comfortable middle-class, well-educated background in Britain. The availability of midnight basketball, subsidized student loans, or a cushy patronage job would not have made a difference in his life.

The real problem is "extremism" so they say. Then it clicked. I started thinking about the truly "extreme" Christians I know, and what they're doing with their lives. While the "extreme Muslims" leave their comfortable, safe middle class existences to travel to uncomfortable and unruly places in order to vandalize, torture, rape, and brutally murder, the "extreme Christians" I know leave their comfortable, safe middle class existences to travel to uncomfortable and unruly places in order feed, heal, and educate.

So is the problem really "extremism", or the ideology that drives an individual's extremism? Hmmm.

Shelly said...

Argh! I didn't know Greg was leaving Red Eye. At least he is still a huge presence on Fox. Greg is successful because he combines conservative views with humor, much like Rush. Rush has ruled talk radio since the 80s because he uses humor along with the conservative commentary. He's a good guy, just like Greg. As for Biden, ostensibly he was chosen in 08 because of his "foreign policy" experience of which Bammy had none. He was kept in 12 to assure he would not be impeached or assassinated.

DougM said...

Wanted you t'know that I just now sussed the whole "Lefty Lucy" joke.
What's next, "Whitey Tighty," "Righty Teddy"?
And where do you get the pictures? Anybody we know?

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

@Dodger Blues- I don't see Gutfeld as sneering, but he IS snarky. And delightfully so.

Regarding climate change, I have yet to see any compelling evidence that (if it even exists) is man-caused. Currently, the "science" is imaginary and entirely political. A power grab and nothing more.

Regarding the infamous dress, in the spirit of MLK I'd prefer to judge it on its content rather than its color.

@PRY- All we can do is hope that Gutfeld's new show smacks it out of the park somehow. He's not just a funny guy - he's smart and he has rare common sense. He's no right wing ideologue, either. He may be the most "fair and balanced" voice on Fox News, as well as the funniest.

@CenTexTim- And I can't emphasize enough that I was talking about Biden. Now that the Internet has umpteen new regulations, I don't want to be accused of using cyber hate speech.

@John the Econ- I think "the soft bigotry of low expectations" is one of the greatest and most important phrases I've heard in ages, and I'm sorry that it isn't front and center in our discussions of race in this country.

But race aside, you're right that the description fits Biden perfectly. His antics are ignored because he's expected to be the court jester at this point. Which is little short of terrifying for a man in his position.

And DAMN, man, you make a fantastic point about the difference between extreme Islamics and extreme Christians. You're right - it's not "extremism" that's the problem, it's the ideology.

@Shelly- We need a lot more voices like Gutfeld's. I think he can speak to a younger audience than Rush can (though Rush is great at what he does).

It's sooooo important to include humor in the mix when getting out the conservative message. One of the main reasons I created Hope n' Change is because I didn't think there was enough genuinely funny (instead of strident) stuff out there.

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

@DougM- I will not be doing a "Righty Tighty" strip in the foreseeable future. Or a "Whitey Tighty" strip; Neil Patrick Harris pretty much ruined that one for me at the Oscars.

Geoff King said...

Per DougM: I also would like to know where you found Lucy. Judging by the myriad poses she assumes, I must believe that she is actually a friend or family member in disguise who has agreed to allow you to make her famous - even if for the wrong reasons.

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

@Geoff King- I didn't find Lefty Lucy. She found me.

Rod said...

In the news today, Boris Nemtsov, a well-known critic of Vladimir Putin who openly opposed the war in Ukraine and blamed Putin for it was shot four times and killed while walking across a bridge over the Moscow River with a lady companion. These bridges are below the descent from Red Square known as Vasilyevsky Spusk. This is city-center Moscow. Putin will personally conduct the investigation; what a hoot.

I've been right there & have walked across those bridges. Nemtsov was a sitting duck. Elsewhere in the former Soviet Union I've also seen dead bodies lying in public with no one approaching them. One had been shot on the steps of a major downtown hotel in Tyumen, Siberia where I was staying at the time. Another had been thrown from a high balcony on a multi-story apartment building in Aktau, Kazakhstan which was along the route I walked to work. It was left the entire work day as an example. That was said to be by Russian mafia.

I don't think many in the USA understand this is the way things are still done in many parts of the world. We don't sufficiently understand other legitimate nations and we don't sufficiently understand ISIS /ISIL or Saudi Arabia, etc. I'm not convinced this kind of understanding exists or is accepted by many of our elected leaders. The mistake we repeatedly make is thinking they have similar values and think like we do; also not realizing communists, socialists, dictators and radical Islamist terrorists understand capitalism just fine. They are often playing hardball for the long term; and it's not always clear WHAT we are doing.

I've also wondered if many of our leaders and staffers in CRUCIAL positions (like Obama on a lot of things; and Kerry currently negotiating a nuclear deal with Iran) have even had formal training in local protocol and negotiation, as many folks from private industry have had. It's basic training for doing business overseas. It's absolutely essential, or one will have zero credibility with them. We really need to establish relevant qualifications, training and expertise in contracting strategy as basic qualifications for high office.

JustaJeepGuy said...

I still find it hard to fathom that nobody made a big deal about what Barack Hussein said about John McCain in his nomination acceptance speech in '08: "...John McCain has been in the Senate for 25 of those years!". NOBODY mentioned that Joe Biden had been in the Senate for 35 of those same years. You'd think that even someone in Barack Hussein's lapdog media would have said something...

On another note, I heard an interesting interview on NPR(!) yesterday. A Jordanian woman was explaining the attraction of ISIS to so many Muslims. It seems that they've looked around at their countries and they see them stagnating. The people who join ISIS really do want to turn the calendar back 1,400 years to when the Muslim world was a dynamic culture, conquering lands all over and making things happen. These are people whom we know are frequently highly educated and even wealthy. They blame the West for their countries' getting nowhere in the modern world and want to return to the "glory" days of Islam. Never mind trying to make their homelands grow, they just want to take the easy route and blame anyone who decided not to stay in the 7th century.

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

@Rod- Great comments, and it sounds like you've got a pretty interesting set of life experiences.

I think you're right that most Americans (including politicians and negotiators) truly don't understand other countries and cultures. And I doubt Kerry is getting training which would make him more effective in his job. I keep reading reports that Iran's negotiators shout at him and insult him, and he just keeps plodding along, giving them more of what they want every time they belittle him (and us).

And of course, we have the recent example of Marie Harf talking about job opportunities being a longterm solution to terrorism. That Western way of thinking doesn't explain the 9/11 terrorists, Jihaddi John the beheader, or ever the three nitwits here in the States who recently wanted to join ISIS.

We need to accept the fact that many people in the world don't want to be anything like us.

@JustaJeepGuy- You're right, nobody seemed to notice that 35 years in the Senate made Joe more of a welfare recipient than a leader.

Per the NPR story, ISIS really does want to turn back the clock. Modernity is offensive to them (in part because they can never successfully compete in that arena). So trying to entice them to give up the fight by being more like us ("they could put down their guns and open a business!") is not only hopeless, but actually adds fuel to the zealots' fires.

John the Econ said...

@Rod, you are so on point regarding how naively we look at these other regimes.

On corruption: What is considered "normal" political activity in these other parts of the world is why I get so animated about corruption here in the USA. One reason that capitalism functions as well as it does here is because as countries go, we are a relatively transparent and compliant society. Most of us understand that we are all mutually better off that way. It's way to easy to slide down the slippery slope to end up with how business is conducted in Russia, where thuggery trumps genteel capitalism.

And we know that Obama, Kerry, and the others at the top are utterly clueless about protocol and negotiation. If I were to be elected President, you bet I'd have experts in protocol in my ear, which is what the State Department is supposed to be doing. The problem is that Obama, Kerry, and the higher-up at State are just too smart to be wasting their time on the basics.

Kerry is just an opportunistic idiot incapable of original thought. Just a cursory glance at his life history demonstrates that he's always been out of phase with what is right. In other words, as long as you believe and do the opposite of what John Kerry does, you will always be assured of being right.

The biggest problem is probably the arrogance Obama carries from his elite education at America's finest universities. He knows it all. And the biggest problem with people who "know it all" is that it's impossible to teach them anything.

Obama carries with him the moral superiority of being a "21st century thinker". This post-modernist intellectual disease that runs rampant in the safely insulated cocoon of academia posits that the future isn't about countries, money, borders or force but good will and collectivism. But here's the problem. 19th century action (Putin) will kick 21st century thinking's ass every single time.

This is why the left keeps getting rolled by the likes of Putin, Iran, and South Korea.

And since morally superior academic-types don't believe in anything bigger than themselves, they'll never understand what motivates ISIS, Boko Haram, or any other of the "extremists" that do. That's why we get the embarrassing silly "community organizer" solutions that haven't even worked in our own cities as supposed solutions to Islamic fascism.

Geoff King said...

Just watched Rand Paul's CPAC speech. Although he is not quite as Libertarian as his father, I was quite impressed. He delivered the entire diatribe without saying ahh, uhh, or umm once - and all without a teleprompter. He actually mentioned the Constitution several times, said he was for term limits and a balanced budget, and said Hillary needs to just take a hike. The audience started chanting "PRESIDENT PAUL!, PRESIDENT PAUL!", and he got a standing ovation at the end.
He most likely will have my vote in 2016....assuming they let him live that long.

John the Econ said...

Too funny: From my "Historically ignorant & irony impaired" file:

Pittsburgh Pirates Sickened to Learn ISIS Executioner 'Jihadi John' Was a Fan

Um, is anyone at the Pittsburgh Pirates organization aware that their team name and logo is, in fact named derived from the Barbary Pirates, who were, in fact, Muslims who not unlike ISIS and Boko Haram invaded, murdered, raped, and traded in slaves?

Skoonj said...

Anyone know why Bill was fired from Red Eye? Is it possible he'll be back, now that Gutfeld is gone?

Wahoo said...

If Lefty Lucy is truly committed to climate change, why doesn't she go topless?