Friday, August 12, 2011

Swirling Wine Clockwise and Counterclockwise

Here's a good laugh for a Friday. It's too early to start drinking, but we can certainly plan ahead for a few experiments with this evenings imbibitions. As far a bogus science goes, this might be the limit. Fortunately, no one is getting hurt from the claims (just maybe a little tipsy), so it's "no harm, no foul".
"Like all living things wine cells have a magnetic polarity, just like humans and the Earth. The positive pole is more highly charged, just like the North Pole of the Earth, which is why there are Northern Lights in the Arctic Circle, but not Southern Lights in the Antarctic."(Sorry, this is completely false.) "This polarity tends to keep wine cells generally upright, (Why? The magnetic field is vertical only at the magnetic poles) spinning on their axis when they are being swirled. This magnetic action within a liquid is commonly demonstrated in laboratories. Because plant molecules are mostly liquid, when they form they are also subject to the electromagnetic forces that are a component of the rotation of the Earth. As a result, the pores on the surface of the molecules (Pores on the surface of molecule?) develop based on that rotation, like the shingles on a roof.

When you swirl the wine counter-clockwise you are pushing against the molecules nap
(So somehow the molecules inherently pick up a clockwise spin. How? Why? Do Australian wines spin the opposite direction?) , just like stroking the fur of a cat the wrong way, this dislodges anything on the surface. Since the flavor from the barrel is introduced fairly late in the wine's development it tends to concentrate in the outer layers. When you swirl the wine counter-clockwise it dislodges that flavor, while at the same, pushing liquid into the pores, inhibiting the fruit flavors that are inside the cell from coming out.

In comparison, when you swirl the wine clockwise the pressure of the surrounding fluid forces the fruit flavors out through the pores. It also pushes any flavors concentrated on the surface down onto the skin of the molecule.
(Well if a molecule can have pores, it can have a skin too.) The fact that the wine is alive, electrically charged, and still changing is why this happens."
Oh, and there's a followup article too!
"Someone quite rudely took exception with my use of the word cell, which is in fact incorrect. The proper term would be molecule or even atom. Everything has a polarity right down to the atomic level, and when put into suspension in a liquid it rotates in relation to that pole. Because we are on a planet that has both a polar system and a consistent rotation, everything forms with a pole and a circular patterning. Wind it one way and it tightens and wind it the other and it unwinds.

Honestly this is just basic physics related to molecular science and plant chemistry, something which herbalists and herbal researchers deal with all the time. A pretty sober group of people."
(emphasis added)
It's also basic physics that the thermal energy in a wine of drinking temperature is more than enough to rapidly randomize any orientation that could possibly exist as a result of the weak magnetic field felt here on Earth.


Hat tip to Stuart Cantrill for the lead (Twitter @stuartcantrill)


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