I think I am going crazy.  I lie to my family and friends .  I am not sure why.  My family was just here and said I dont let them into my thoughts.  I have lost my husband to kidney failure last week.  My family said I don't show emotion until I get "upset".  I think they are right.  I fear for my future.  Even my 97 year old mother told them I am too busy doing what I want to come to visit with her.   She is right.  I am sorry but the truth does hurt.  I want to change but dont know how to start.
Hello Welcome to health care magic I can understand your situation. I appreciate your effort to seek online support. As per your details, you are possibly having underlying anxiety/depression/grief reaction. For this consult a psychiatrist for detailed evaluation. Following treatment strategies would be helpful- 1) Antidepressants like SSRIs (escitalopram, sertarline, paroxetine etc) 2) Antianxiety agents like clonazepam, lorazepam, alprazolam etc 3) Psychotherapy/ Counselling sessions 4) Relaxation techniques like yoga, meditation, deep breathing etc Hope it helps Good luck Regards Dr. Gourav Monga Consultant Psychiatrist