Hi doctor, I am an 18 year old boy. Last year, I made a very best friend. He was like my second half. He used to share each and everything with me. A few months back, I saw him with his ex-girlfriend, and they were in a relationship now. He never told me that. She lives near my home, and my friend always drops her to her home, but whenever I asked him to come to my place he used to tell that it is too far away. Then we had a major fight without any violence, and we both stopped talking. Then I started realizing that I like him so much. I miss him as he used to hold my hand in public places always. I started remaining sad the whole day. I was depressed, and I tried to commit suicide. After that, it is like at sometimes during the night I express all my warm feelings with anyone on chat, and after a few minutes, I regret it. I feel like there are two persons inside me. First I thought that it is split personality, but I do not have memory loss. Please help me. What should I do? I hate his girlfriend. But, I am not sure whether I love my friend or not. Sometimes, I feel like I love him and after a few minutes, it is like just friendship. Am I gay? But, but I have a crush on girls also. I think I am attracted to both boys and girls. I am totally confused. Please help me.
Hi. I can understand your problem. This is completely normal at the age of 18 years. You like your friend as a friend and not as a partner. He was very close to you, but it does not mean you are gay. This is a very common feeling at your age. At this age, we can get attracted towards both the sexes, but this feeling is temporary. As your friend is in a relationship with a girl, it is evident that he will less interact with you. So do not get hurt. You should respect your friendship and his decision. Presently you are irritable because of depression, and you miss your relationship. You have suicidal ideation. To avoid this situation get involved yourself in some outdoor games and other hobbies. Make new friends, interact socially and stop negative thinking. If this thought sustains, then you can visit a local psychiatrist for treatment with medicines. But, do not worry. You will be fine. For further information consult a psychiatrist online -->