Hello......I am a 24 years old M. Tech student ......I have following problems : 1) In my early childhood I was very shy and not able to eat and speak in front of people other than my parents. I was not able to speak in school and many people thought that I was dumb. Although I stood first or second in class..........I could not speak in school , even after the beatings of teacher. When I went to College to do B. Tech. I started speaking a little, since there are new people who didn t know about me, but now I only answer the qustions asked by someone in minimum words and it was always a embarrasing moment when it came to speak in front of the class. Today , I hav a little improvement but I am not able to live a normal life and not able to speak in interview . I think I have not enjoyed the life as others do.and I am not able to make friends....I have noone to share my feelings.........what to do 2) From 3 years, my eyes are brimmed with tears and I becomme emotional most of the time I go out of the home for some work to deal with people .....while actually there is no reason to cry.....this also happens when I see someone crying in TV shows or in reality. or when I didn t llike something or when someone other than parents argues with me . 3) I have to think some things forcefully and repeatedly...........such as thoughts of abusive language about some respectable person come in my mind spontaneously and unwantedly and then I have to ask God for forgive me and about long live of that person.......since I have never abused anyone ....... but I have no control on the thoughts coming to my mind and therefore I have to ask God to forgive me. and thoughts such as about wishing God health and long live of my family members. I have gradually developed this problem from about 9 years when I first time saw human death in reality (of my father s brother). As a result, today I have lost concentration in studies and not able to do my project work. 4) I lost my attention while riding or driving due to unwanted thoughts and has no confidence of driving or riding , therefore I have to go by using publc transport and wait for that. While my younger brother who is 6 years younger than me goes every where on vehicle and enjoys with his friends . This is developing feelings of hopelessness and inferiority complex in me. 5) I have lost my will power and I don t study even if I know it is necessary and I scratch my face unwantedly due to this. Hence, my face now has spots which further lowers my self confidence. 6) I am feeling that due to forced thinking, my ability to understand complex things is decreasing . And I take more time in doing tasks which other people complete in less time. 7) I didn t feel fresh (as I felt before 10 years) , no matter how many hours I sleep. All day I feel sleepy. All these things have affected my life severely . I don t understand what to do. Sometimes I feel that my life will go waste. Please help me since my father has died of cancer 3 years ago and I am the elder son and I have to support my family . Nobody is able to understand my problems and they say that I have no problem .I know that I am able to achieve a lot in my life if I get rid of all these problems.
Hi Mayank, Thanks for writing in. I do understand your predicament. Your entire history is suggestive of an anxiety disorder which is leading to the symptoms you are currently experiencing. This commonly occurs when we experience a lot of stress due to some reasons and we cannot take the stress any longer. The fact that you need to support your family adds to the stress. The following measures will help: a.     Identify what you really want in your life and make them your long term goals b.     Decide the best path to achieve these goals and break the journey into small, achievable goals c.     Congratulate yourself or treat yourself whenever you achieve one of these small goals d.     Start with setting down to achieve 1 goal at a time. Once you’re done, start with the 2nd one and go on. e.     Whenever you feel you can’t do it, take a  few deep breaths and start over again. f.     Pranayama and yoga will help you a lot and will help treat the anxiety that you are currently experiencing. g.     Give yourself a strong message that if you cant do it, nobody else can. Try this for 2 weeks and see if it helps. Regards