Hello doctor, I am 18 yrs old, and I want to know what is my mental illness because here in my country, consultation in hospitals is very expensive. The things that I am concerned about are: 1. I can not control my anger. It started even when I was a kid; I always had tantrums until now. 2. I always feel sad and sometimes I feel nothing. And I am not interested in doing something like going to school. 3. I do not have close friends. I had, but I always separate myself from them because they make me angry. 4. I harm myself. It started when I was in highschool, and I stopped it when I was in my senior year because I had a new way of expressing my emotions, which are drinking, having piercings, and tattoos (even though I am not in the legal age). 5. I have a suicidal feel. I tried to commit suicide for the past few weeks, and I am still planning. 6. I always have mood swings. 7. People cannot control me when I needed something. 8. I don't like people, and I rarely empathize with others. I don't express my emotions or have empathy for others. I don't know why I am like this. Please help me.
Hello. I can understand your condition, but here you are not at the level to understand your condition because you have two extreme levels of thinking, which are called "All or None," "Black or White," "Good or Bad" these feelings are called, dichotomous thinking. This reflects borderline personality symptoms in which a person feels a chronic feeling of emptiness, impulsive behavior, sometimes over expectations and some times zero expectations, deliberate self-harm to control anger, or frustration and to calm down, and then guilt, depression and behavioral issues are common. The patient may go into multiple relationships, conflicts with family and family issues, or family history of psychiatric illness. In this condition, you need psychiatric consultation, which is urgent at this time because of your suicidal thoughts and behavior. Talk to your family, tell them your feelings and go to the psychiatrist as soon as possible.