 Ancient Hawaiians called the island <unk> ( " isle of attraction " or " island of strife " ) , after the ceremony ( ʻume ) held during the <unk> festival for married couples who were having difficulty conceiving children . In the Hawaiian language the word <unk> means to cut or sever in two , as well as an island or inlet . The word ʻume means to draw , attract or entice and was used to name the ceremony for the common people . Hawaii historian Herb <unk> Kāne considered ʻume to be a courtship game . Those selected for ʻume ( never virgins or the unmarried ) would sing around a large bonfire while a tribal leader with a <unk> ( wand ) chanted , touching individual men and women . Those who were touched would find a secluded part of the island to have sex . Husbands and wives were not paired , and jealousy was discouraged . Children born of these unions were considered children of the husband , not the biological father . By 1830 , this activity was forbidden by Christian missionaries . 
