 " Stay Together for the Kids " is written about divorce from the point of view of a helpless child . Its heavier sound was inspired by bands the group 's members were listening to in the two weeks they wrote their fourth album , Take Off Your Pants and Jacket , such as Fugazi and Refused . Primarily written by guitarist Tom DeLonge , the song is biographical in nature . He and bassist Mark Hoppus were growing up when their parents divorced . For Hoppus , he was eight years old when he was sent to live with his father . " The thing you realize as you get older is that parents don ’ t know what the hell they ’ re doing and neither will you when you get to be a parent . You ’ ve just got to understand that people are human and they make mistakes , " he said . DeLonge remembered learning of his parents ' divorce when he discovered scrape marks on the driveway of their home . " Right then , I knew my dad had dragged out his furniture single @-@ handedly , " he recalled . He spoke on the song 's inspiration in 2001 : 
