 In Liao custom betrothal was seen as being equally serious to , if not more serious than , marriage itself , and was difficult to annul . The groom would pledge to work for three years for the bride 's family , pay a bride price , and lavish the bride 's family with gifts . After the three years , the groom would be allowed to take the bride back to his home , and the bride would usually cut off all ties with her family . 
