text: CREATE PROCEDURE insertOrUpdateDb2Z()
  BEGIN
  DECLARE v_reccount INTEGER
  SET v_reccount = (SELECT COUNT(*) FROM "LTHUSER".authors WHERE id = '1')
  IF v_reccount = 0 THEN
  INSERT INTO "LTHUSER".authors (id, first_name, last_name, email, birthdate, added) VALUES ('1', 'Adam', 'Gods', 'test1@example.com', '1000-02-27', '2000-02-04T02:32:00')
  ELSEIF v_reccount = 1 THEN
  UPDATE "LTHUSER".authors SET added = '2000-02-04T02:32:00', birthdate = '1000-02-27', email = 'test1@example.com', first_name = 'Adam', last_name = 'Gods' WHERE id = '1'
  END IF
  END
  CALL insertOrUpdateDb2Z()
  DROP PROCEDURE insertOrUpdateDb2Z
  CREATE PROCEDURE insertOrUpdateDb2Z()
  BEGIN
  DECLARE v_reccount INTEGER
  SET v_reccount = (SELECT COUNT(*) FROM "LTHUSER".authors WHERE id = '7')
  IF v_reccount = 0 THEN
  INSERT INTO "LTHUSER".authors (id, first_name, last_name, email, birthdate, added) VALUES ('7', 'Noah', 'Lamekhs', 'test2@example.com', '2000-02-27', '1994-12-10T01:00:00')
  ELSEIF v_reccount = 1 THEN
  UPDATE "LTHUSER".authors SET added = '1994-12-10T01:00:00', birthdate = '2000-02-27', email = 'test2@example.com', first_name = 'Noah', last_name = 'Lamekhs' WHERE id = '7'
  END IF
  END
  CALL insertOrUpdateDb2Z()
  DROP PROCEDURE insertOrUpdateDb2Z
  CREATE PROCEDURE insertOrUpdateDb2Z()
  BEGIN
  DECLARE v_reccount INTEGER
  SET v_reccount = (SELECT COUNT(*) FROM "LTHUSER".authors WHERE id = '8')
  IF v_reccount = 0 THEN
  INSERT INTO "LTHUSER".authors (id, first_name, last_name, email, birthdate, added) VALUES ('8', 'Muhammad', 'Ibn Abdullah', 'test3@example.com', '3000-02-27', '2000-12-10T01:00:00')
  ELSEIF v_reccount = 1 THEN
  UPDATE "LTHUSER".authors SET added = '2000-12-10T01:00:00', birthdate = '3000-02-27', email = 'test3@example.com', first_name = 'Muhammad', last_name = 'Ibn Abdullah' WHERE id = '8'
  END IF
  END
  CALL insertOrUpdateDb2Z()
  DROP PROCEDURE insertOrUpdateDb2Z