SYN0PSI9.
CHAPTER I—Fired by the news of the
funking of the Lusitania by a German
submarine, Arthur Guy Empey, an Ameri
can, leaves his office in Jersey City and
goes to England where he enlists In the
British army.
One sunny day In the front-line
trenrh, I saw three officers sitting out
side of their difgout (“cooties” are no
respecters of rank ; I have even noticed
a suspicious uneasiness about a certain
well-known general), one of them was
a major, two of them were exploring
their shirts, paying no attention to the
occasional shells which passed over
head. The major was writing a letter;
every now and then he would lay aside
his writing-pad, search his shirt for a
few minutes, get au inspiration, and
then resume writing. At last he fin
ished his l^er and gave It to his “run
ner.’’ I w|Pk urious to see whether he
was writing to an insect firm, so when
the runner passed me I engaged him
In conversation and got a glimpse at
^ the address on the envelope. It was
addressed to Miss Alice Somebody, in
I^mdon. The “runner” Informed me
that Miss Somebody was the major’s
sweetheart und that he wrote to her
every day. Just imagine It, writing a
love letter during a “cootie" hunt; but
such Is the creed of the trenches.
CHAPTER III.
: 7 i
I Go to Church.
Upon enlistment we had Identity
disks Issued to us. These were small
disks of red fiber worn around the neck
by means of a string- Most of the Tom
mies also used a little metal disk which
they wore around the left wrist by
means of a chain. They had previous
ly figured It out that If their heads
were blown ofT, the disk on the left
wrist would Identify them. If they lost
their left arm the disk around the neck
would serve the purpose, hut If their
head and left arm were blown off. no
one would care who they -were, so It
did not matter. On one side of the
disk was Inscribed your rank, name,
number and battalion, while on the
other was stamped your religion.
C. of E.. meaning Church of Eng
land; It. O., Roman Catholic; W., Wes
leyan; P.t Presbyterian; but If you
happened to he an atheist they left It
blank, dhd just bunded you u pick and
shovel. On my disk was stamped C. of
E. This Is how I got It: The lieuten
ant who enlisted me asked my religion.
I was not sure of the religion of the
British army, so I enswered, "Ot^ any
old thing," und ho promptly put down
C. of E.
Now, Just Imagine my hard luck, Out
of five religions I was unlucky enough
to pick the only one where church
parade was compulsory!
The next morning was Sunday. I
wo* sitting in the billet writing home
to my sister tPlJIng her of my wonder
ful exploits while fire—all re
cruits do this. The sergeant major put
Ills head In the door of the billet and
shouted: “C, Iff E. outside for church
parade!"
I kept on writing. Turning to me, in
n loud voice, he asked, “Erupey, uren't
you C. of «.?”
I answered, “Yojl."
In an angry tone, he commanded,
“Don’t you ‘yep’ me. Say, ‘Yes, ser
geant major.’"
“I did so. Somewhat mollified, ha
ordered. “Outside for church purade.”
I looked up and answered, “I am
not going to church tlfls morning."
He said, “Oh, yes, you aral"
I answered, “Oh, no, I’m not J"—But
1 went.
We lined up outside with rifles and
bayonets, 120 rounds of ammunition,
weuring our tin hats, and the inarch
to church began. After marching about
five kilos, we turned off the roud Into
an open field. At one end of this Held
the chaplain was standing In a Umber.
We formed a semicircle around him.
Overhead there was a black speck cir
cling round and round In the sky. This
was u German Fokker. The chaplain
had n book In his left hand—left eye
on the book—right eye on the airplane.
We Tommies were lucky, we had no
hooks, so had both eyes on the air
plane.
After church parade we were
marched hack to our billets, and played
footbutl all afternoon.
CHAPTER IV.
“Into the Trench."
The next morning the draft was In
spected by pur general, and we were
assigned to iiliiei'Pnt companies. The
boys In the brigade IimiI fltckpi)nied
this general Old Pepper, and ha e»r
tnlnly earned the sobriquet. 1 was as
signed to B company with another
American named Stewart.
For the next ten days we “rested."
Tepalrlng roads for the Frenchles, drill
ing. und digging bombing trenches.
Oue morning we were informed that
we were going up the line, aiul out
march began.
It took us three days to reach re
serve billets—eaeh day’s march bring
lio; the sound of the guns nearer and
i nearer. At night, way off in the dis
tance we could see their flashes, which
j lighted up the sky with a red glare.
Against the horizon we could see
| numerous observation balloons or “sau
sages” ns they are called.
On the afternoon of the third day’s
march I witnessed my first airplane
j being shelled. A thrill ran through me
and I gazed in awe. -The airplane was
making wide circles in the air, while
little puffs of white smoke were burst
ing all around It. These puffs appeared
like tiny balls of cotton while after
each burst could be heard a dull
“plop.” The sergeant of my platoon
Informed us that It was a German air
plane and I wondered how he could tell
from sucli a distance because the plane
seemed like a little black speck in the
sky. I expressed my doubt as to
whether it was English, French or Ger
man. With a look of contempt he fur
i ther Informed us that the allied anti
aircraft shells when exploding emitted
white smoke while file German shells
gave forth black smoke, and, as he ex
pressed it, “It must he an Allemnnd be
cause our pom-poms are shelling, and
I know our batteries are not off their
bally nappers and are certainly not
strafeing our own planes, and another
piece of advice—don’t chuck your
weight about until you’ve been up the
line and learnt something.”
I immediately quit “chucking my
weight about" from that time on.
Just before reaching reserve billets
we were marching along, laughing, and
singing one of Tommy’s trench ditties:
munleation “trench, six Inches deep
with mud. This trench was called
“Whisky street.” On our way up to
the front line an occasional flare of
bursting shrapnel would light up the
sky and we could hear the fragments
slapping the ground above us on our
right and left. Then a Fritz would
traverse hack and forth with his “type
writer” or machine gun. The bullets
made a sharp cracking noise overhead.
The boy in front of me named Pren
tice crumpled up without a word. A
piece of shell had gone through his
shrapnel-proof helmet. I felt sick and
weak.
In about thirty minutes we reached
the front line. It was dark as pitch.
Kvery now and then a German star
shell would pierce the blackness out
in front with its silvery light. I was
trembling all over, and felt very lonely
and afraid. All orders were given in
whispers. The company we relieved
filed past us and disappeared into the
blackness of the communication trench
leading to the rear. As they passed us,
they whispered, "The best o’ luck
mates.”
I sat on the Are step of the trench
with the rest of the men. In each
traverse two of the older men had been
put on guard with their heads sticking
A Bomb Proof.
communication""
TRENCH
3 to 5 Ft.T iSStn 6jif
V//////////////////////////>/////////////////■//,
Diagram Showing Typical Front-Line and Communication Jreruih**,
I don’t want to go to the tren lies no
more
Where suusages and whizz-bangs are ga
lore.
Take me over the sea. Where the Alle- i
jtnand can't get at trie,
Oti, tny, I don’t want to die,
I want to go hoftte—"
when overhead eatne a “swish" through
the air. rapidly followed by three oth
ers. Then about two'hundred yards to
our left In a large field, four columns
of black earth and smoke rose Into the
air, and the ground trembled from the
report—tjo explosion (if four German
five-nine’s, or 'VoiilhoxeS:" A sharp
whistle blast, Immediately followed b.v
two 6hort opes, rang out front the head
of opr PoIhpiPt This was to take up
“nrtlllery formation." We divided Into
small squads and went Into the fields
on the right and left of the road, and
crouched on the ground. No other
shells followed this salvo. It was our
first baptism by shell flrp, front the
waist up I was pll enthusiasm, hut from
there dowp, everything was missing. I
thought i should (lie with fright.
After awhile, we reformed Into col
umns of fours, and proceeded on our
i ....... I
About five that night, we reached the
ruined village of H-, and I got tny
flrRt sight of the awful destruction
caused by German Kultur,
Marching down the main street we
came to the heart of the village, and
took up quarters In sljellproof cellars
(shellproof until hit by a shell). Shells
were constantly whistling over the vil
lage and bursting In our rear, search
ing tor our artillery.
These cellars were cold, damp and
smelly, and overrun with large rats—
big black fellows. Most of the Tom
mies slept with their overcoats ovey
their fapes. J did pot In the middle
of the night 1 woke up In terror. The
cold, clammy feet of a rat had passed
over my face, I immediately smoth
ered myself in my overcoat, but could i
not sleep for the rest of that night.
Next evening, we took over our see- >
tor of the line. In single file we wend
ed our way through a zigzag com- j
flyer the top. aqjl with their eyes try
ing to pierce the blackness In “No
flan’s Land,” In this trench there
were only two (logouts, and these wefe
used by Lewis and Vickers machine
gunners, so it was the tire step for
ours. Pretty soon it started to rain.
We put on our "macks,” but they were
not much protection. The rain trickled
down our backs, and it was not long
before we were wet and cold. How I
passed that night 1 will never know,
hut without any unusual occurrence,
dawn arrived,
The word "stand down" was passed
along the line, and the sentries got
down off the tire step. Pretty soon the
rum issue came along, and it was a
Godsend. It warmed our chilled bodies
and put new life into us. Then from
the communication trenches came
dixies or iron pots, tilled with steam
ing tpa, which had two wooden stakes
through their handles, and were car
ried by two men, l tilled my canteen
and drank the hot tea without taking
It from my lips. It was not long be
fore I was asleep in the mud on the
tire step.
My ambition had been attained! I
was in a front-line trench on the west
ern front, and ,ih. how 1 wished I were
buck in Jersey City.
CHAPTER V.
Mud, Rats and Shells.
I must hnve slept fur two or throe
hours, not the refreshing kind that re
sults from clean sheets and soft pil
lows, htit the sleep that conies from
cold, wet and sheer exhaustion.
Suddenly, the earth seetue-ti shake
and a thunderclap hufsl Id my ears. I
opened my eyes j was splashed uP
flYW v\ith sticky mud, and mew were
picking themselves up from the bottom
of the trench. The parapet on my left
hud toppled Into the trench, completely
blocking It with a wall of tossed-up
earth. The man on my left lay still. I
rubbed the mud from my face, and nn
awful sight met my gaze—his head
was smashed to a pulp, and his steel
helmet was full ol' bruins und blood.
A German “Minnie” (trench mortar)
hart exploded in the next traverse. Men
were dipping into the soft mass of mud
in a frenzy of haste. Stretcher-bear
ers came up the trench on the double.
After a few minutes of dipping, three
still, muddy forms on stretchers were
carried down the communication
trench to the rear. Soon they would
be resting “somewhere in France,” with
a little wooden cross over their heads.
They had done their bit for king and
country, had died without firing a shot,
but their services were appreciated,
nevertheless.
Later on. I found out their names.
They belonged to our drnft.
I was dazed and motionless. Sud
denly a shovel wns pushed into my
bands, and a rough but kindly voice
said:
“Here, my lad, lend a bend clearing
the trench, but keep your In ad down,
and look out for snipers. One of the
Fritz’s is a daisy, and he’ll get you if
you’re not careful.”
Lying on my belly on the bottom of
the trench, I filled sandbags with the
sticky mud, they were dragged to my
rear by the other men, and the work of
rebuilding the parapet was on. The
harder I worked, the better I felt. Al
though the weather was cold, I was
soaked with sweat.
Occasionally a bullet would crack
overhead, and a machine gun would
kick up the mud on the bashed-in paru
pet. At each crack I would duck and
shield my face with my arm. One of
the older men noticed this action of
mine, and whispered:
"Don't duck at the crack of n bul
let, Yank; the danger has passed—you
never hear the one that wings you.
Always remember that^f you are going
to pet it, you’ll get it, so never worry."
This made a great impression on me
at the time, and from then on, I adopt
ed his motto, “If you’re going to get It.
It helped me wonderfully. I used It
so often afterwards that some of niv
mates dubbed me, “If you’re going to
get It, you'll get It."
After an hour’s hard work, all my
nervousness left me, and I wus laugh
ing and joking with the rest.
At one o’clock, dinner cnme up In
the form of a dixie of hot stew.
I looked for my canteen. It had
fallen off the fire step, and was half
burled In the mud. The man on my
left noticed this, and told the corporal,
dishing out the rations, to put my
share in his mess tin. Then he whis
pered to me, “Always take care of your
mess tin, mate.”
I had learned another maxim of the
trenches.
That stew tasted fine. I was as
hungry as a bear. We had “seconds,"
or another helping, because three of
the men had “gone West,” killed by
the explosion of the German trench
mortar, and we ate their share, but
still I was hungry, so I filled in with
bully beef and biscuits. Then I drained
my water bottle. Later on I learned
another maxim of the front line, “Go
sparingly with your water.” The bully
beef made me thirsty, and by tea time
I was dying for a drink, but my pride
would not allow me to ask my mates
for water. I was fast learning the
ethics of the trenches.
That night I was put on guard with
an older man. We stood on the fire
step with our hands over the top, peer
ing out Into No Man’s Land. It was
•ervous work for me. but the other fel
low seemed to take it as part of the
night's routine.
Then something shot past my face.
My heart stopped heating, and l ducked
my head below the parapet. A s^t
chuckle from my mate brought me to
my senses, and I feebly asked. “For
heaven’s sake, what was that?”
He answered. "Only a rat taking a
promenade along the sandbags.” I
felt very sheepish.
About every twenty minutes the sen
try In the next traverse would fire a
stur shell from his flare_ pistol. The
piop wouui give me a Start of fright.
I never got used to this noise during
my service in the trenches.
I would watch the arc described by
the star shell, and then stare Into No
Man’s Land waiting for it to burst. In
its lurid light the barbeg wire and
stakes would be silhouetted against its
light like a latticed window. Then
darkness.
Once, out in front of our wire, I
beard a noise and saw dark forms
moving. My rifle was lying across the
sandbagged parapet. I reached for it,
and was taking jjim to fire, when my
mate grasped my arm, and whispered,1
“Don't live." He challenged in a krw i
voice. The reply came buck instantly 1
from the dark forms:
“Shut your blinkin’ mottth, you
bloomin’ idiot; do you want us to «■ u0k
it from t lie Bodies ?”
. Later we learned that tiki Wig.-d, *‘\0
challenging nr ttrtag, wiring party out
in frord.“ had been given to the sentry
uti «ur right, but he had fu}’,ed to pass
it down the trench. An oflVcer had over
heard our challenge and the reply, and
Immediately put the offending wintry
under arrest. The sentry cEckeil
twenty-omj days on the whorl, that is,
be received twenty-one days’ field pun
IslupMU No. 1, or “crucifixhag” as
Tommy terms It.
This consists of being spread-eagled
on the wheel of u. limber two lunirs a
day fur twenty-one days, regardless of
the weather, During this period, your
rations consist of bully beef, biscuits
and writer.
A few months later I met this sentry
and lie confided to me. that since being
"crucified,” be hud never failed to pass
the word down the trench when so or
dered. In view of tlie offense, the
above punishment was very light, in
that falling to pass the word down a
trench may mean the loss of many
lives, uud the spoiling of some impor
laut enterprise in No Man’s Laml.
(CouUuued Next Week.)
a .
FEDERAL INCOME
4 TAX IN BRIEF
The Requirements Boiled Down
for Busy Folks.
Returns must be filed on or before
April 1, 1918.
Tax due may be paid now or on or
before June 15, 1918.
If you are single and your net In
come for 1917 was $1,000 or more you
must file a return.
If you were married and living with
wife (or husband) and had a net In
come of $2,000 or more for 1017 you
must file a return.
Husband's and wife's Income must
be considered Jointly, plus Income of
minor children.
Income of a minor or Incompetent,
derived from a separate estate, must
be reported by his legal representa
tive.
Severe penalties are provided for
those who neglect or evade the law.
For false or fraudulent return there
Is a penalty not exceeding $2,000 fine
or year's Imprisonment, or both, plus
100 per cent of tax.
For failure to make return on or
before April 1, 1918, fine Is from $20
to $1,000, plus 50 per cent, of tax due.
Returns must be filed with the Col
lector of Internal Revenue of district
In which you live.
An agent may file return for * per
son who is 111, absent from fjhe country
nr.otherwise Incapacitated.
Each return must bo signed snd
sworn or affirmed by person execut
ing It.
Single persons are allowed $1,000
A married person living with wife
(or husband) is allowed $2,000 exemp
tion, plus $200 for each dependent
child under 18.
A head of fanfliy, though single, la
allowed $2,000 exemption If actually
supporting on# or more relatives.
Upturns must show the entire
amount of earnings, gains and profits
received during the year.
Officials and employees are not taxa
ble on the salaries or wages received
from a state, county, city or town In
the United States.
Interest on state and municipal
bonds Issued within the U. S. ts ex
empt from federal Income tax and
should he omitted.
Interest on United Staties govern
ment bonds Is also exempt, except on
Individual holdings of l.lhecty Fours In
excess of $5,000 par value.
Dividends are not subjeict to normal
tax, but must be reported *and included
In net Income.
Gifts and legacies sire not lncoim
and should not be Irjrluded on the re
turn of the beneficiary.
Life insurance /ecelved as a bene
ficiary or as pryinlums paid back at
maturity or surrender of policy is not
income.
Payments, received for real or per
sonal property sold Is not Income, but
the profit realized thereon Is Income
for t^e year of sale.
Amounts received in payment of
notes or mortgages Is not Income, but
the Interest on such notes or mort
gages ts taxable Income.
From the entire groeis Income cer
tain allowances are made in arriving
at the net Income.
Necessary expenses actually paid In
the conduct of business, trade or pro
fession may be claimed.
A farmer can claim payments for
labor, seed, fertiliser, stock feed, re
pairs on buildings, except Ills dwelling;
repairs of fences and farm machinery,
materials and small tools for limnedl
The amount of vent paid for a farm
may also he claimed as a tenant farm
er’s expense.
Payments for Jive stock are allowa
ble If bought for resale. But If Iwiugiit
for breeding l/jrposes cattle are an In
vestment, i)an expense, and cannot
be allowed.
A storekeeper can claim amounts
paid for advertising, clerk hire, tele
phone, v ater. light and fuel, also dray
age ay d freight bills and cost of op
erate. g and repairing wagons and
tjfcir Us.
A physician can claim cost of ids
/irofesslonal supplies, rent, office help,
telephone, expense of team or automo
bile used In making professional calls
and expenses attending medical con
ventions.
A dentist can claim similar Items,
except team or auto expense, which
are not necessary In his profession.
Expenses that are personal or con
nected In any way with the support or
well being of, a person or family are
not allowable.
The costs of machines. Instruments,
vehicles or Implements that are more
or less permanent In character are not
allowable as an expense. They are In
vestments.
Interest paid on a mortgage or other
personal indebtedness Is allowable on
a personal return.
All taxes paid within the year can
! e taken out on a federal return, ex
cept federal income tuxes, inhreritance
taxes and assessments for local im
provements.
bosses sustained In business or
through fire, srortu or shipwreck or by
theft, except when compensated by In
surance or otherwise.
Wear and tear of rented buildings or
machinery used in business may be
-claimed.
You can also claim the amount paid
i<> the lied f'ross ami to other charita
ble. religions or educational organiza
tion lo the extent of 15 per cent, of
| your net Income,
GIVE BIG RETURNS
Carafes* or improper Feeding I* a
Wa*t* #f Time and
Money. |
GIVE THE HEN A CHANCE.
A hen cannot lay a large number of
**■* unless fad the proper eg* fann
ing material. A little grain, a littie
b#e< scrap or milk added to a Mttle
aheat bran and short* aad com meul
urlth a llttla trees feed will giro eur
prlaing result* In egg production. It
la not the cheapest feed that pays
but the kiad that contains the moat
•gg forming elements Carelee* or
improper feeding is a waste of time
aad money.
GROW MORE POTATOES.
■»' J. S. Knox, Horticulturist, Agri
cultural Extension Division, Univer
sity of Arkansas.
No other vegetable is of »o great
Importance to the world at tba pres
ent time as is the Irish potato. That
the United States and her allle* will
need a larger amount of these thi*
year than ever before la the opinion of
thoae wbe are in a position to know.
Arkansas can help wonderfully In the
production of this extra amount of
potatoes If every fanner, whether ten
ant or land owner, will plant from
one-half to one acre of potatoes this
spring
The importance of good seed can
not be over-estimated. No matter
what the soil mar be, or hoar ideal the
climate, rainfall or cultivation, w«
cannot hope lor a maximum field
from poor seed. If you have a supply
of home grown potatoes frau your
fall crop that are In good condition
plant these. All potatoes wheth
er or not disease tan be seen on them
should be dietnfectd before planting.
Thla Is done by eoaklng tbe potatoes
for two hours In a solution made by
mixing one pint of.46 per cent formal
dehyde with SO gallons of water. The
treatment should be made }u«t before
the potatoe* are to he cut for plant
' Ing.
The question of fertiliaere la one
which is not given enough considera
tion by the average grower. In the
potato section of the United States,
especially in the trucking sections
along the Atlantic coast, the farmer*
use from 1,000 to 2.000 pounds of com
mercial fertilizer per acre. The
root system of the potato is
relatively small, thus making it neces
sary to have an abundance ot availa
ble plant food f..r its use. If as high
as 6<»0 to 1,000 pounds of fertiliser Is
to be ueed per acre, it la eonai'Aered
best to broadcast the greater part of
it, reserving 800 to 400 pounds to ap
ply in the drill with the potatoes,
being sure to mix this with the toil
before the potatoes are planted. V
it is best to use at least medium \
sized potatoes for planting and these
should be cut into araall pieces. A
medium sired potato will usually
make from three to four pieces large
•nougn to piant, ana ir possible each
piece should have two evea- or seo
rions from whieh aprouta will come
The small potatoes do sot furnish
sufficient plant, footl to nourish the
young plants unlit they ean get hold
on the soil; oonseuuenUy weak plants
ara produced Tor the spring plant
ing a depth of ebon* three inr.hek la
conaidsred sufficient to plant, but for
the fail crop from four to six inches
is not too deep to plant heeauae at
that Uina it ie often the case that we
have to get down deeper to get suf
ficient moisture for Ihe potato te
sprout.
Tt pays 1o keep the soil p'aan dur
ing the growing period of the potato.
It it doubted if ever a deeper cultiva
tion than two or three inches is nec
essary. This thould, however, be done
at least, once every two weeks, or,
in case of rains. a« soon thereafter
as the soil will peimit. Along with
the cultivation should come the spray
ing of the Tinea te control bugs and
blight.. The apraying seems to Kpep
the leaves In far belter condition, and
in actual t*a*a where bugs or blight
had been seen, the ylefld of potatoes
sprayed was better than thosd'*un
sprayed.
The Red Bliss or Bliss Triumph is
one of the very best early varieties
Tor us to grow. Early Ohio and Irish
| Cobbler are also good. The early, pa
! turinf varieties like the above-..are
1 considered hast for the South because
they mature before the excessive heat
of summer, and are'likely to keep hot
ter than the other varieties w’hleh ma
ture later. Plant a patch of potatoes
and help your Unde Sam to vein the
war. If you will have seed potatoes
to sell, write to the Extension Divi
sion. Old State House, Utile Rock,
Ark., telling us how many bushels
you have, what varieties and price
per bushel. The marketing man will
advertise them for you free of charga
igid can doubtless And a buyar.
i