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“John,” said the milkman sternly, to his
son, who was standing near, “did you give
tlie cows a drink before you milked ’em
this morning?”—Ohio State Journal.
I am sure Piso's Cure for Consumption
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Robbins, Maple Street, Norwich, N. Y.,
Feb. 17, 1900.
Each succeeding year iinds the unedu
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—Puck.
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We discover that almost anybody thinks
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At times all of us insist on being miser
able.—Atchison Globe.
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The lightning calculator is merely a figure
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CONSUMPTION
4
It Purports to Have Been Issued by
American Soldiers Who De
serted to the Enemy.
COMRADES INVITED TO DO LIKEWISE.
The Document,However, in Believed,
by Cieu. ChntTee, to llnve Ileeu
Prepared by Fllipinoa mill Signed
By the American Soldiers Inder
Duress.
Washington, Jan. 5.—The war de
partment has received from the Phil
ippines copies of a remarable proc
lamation, signed with the names of
nine Americans—seven of them stated
as being in the United States military
service—inviting American soldiers
to desert and join tne ranks of the
Filipino soldiery. The text of the
document is as follows:
The Proelunintion.
“To whom it may concern:
"Dear Fellow Countrymen—After many
months among the Filipino people, study
ing their customs and characters, we,
the undersigned, have come to the con
clusion that the time has arrived for us
to break the silence and let you know the
real truth so that you will see the folly
of continuation of fighting these people
who are defending their country against
the cruel American invasion in the same
manner in which our forefathers did
against England in those glorious days of
our grand and noble liberator, Gen.
George Washington.
“Since the day we were led by our con
science and presented ourselves to the
Philippine authorities we have received
the best of treatment, and we are enjoy
ing a life of luxury without having to
put our lives in danger as do you, who
still remain in the American ranks light
ing for an unjust cause, which, sooner
or later, must surely prove disastrous,
ns it did to the Spanish, notwithstanding
that they knew the country and customs
of the people better than the Americans
do.
"For above-mentioned reasons and also
that the war may soon end, we ask the
men of the American army, stationed in
these Islands to present themselves to
the Philippine authorities as we did,
thereby showing yourselves to be true
Americans, upholding the policy of Wash
ington and the Monroe doctrine against
the ambitious policy of President Mc
Kinley, who, for two years, has carried
on this cruel war, spilling the innocent
blood of thousands of American soldiers,
and with what object? To. till the pockets
of Mark Hanna and several other Ameri
can capitalists, who have been lor years
and are now ruling America to-day, or. in
other words, changing your blood for
gold and robbing many a loving mother
or wife of son or husband, thereby mak
ing many a once-happy home sad and
miserable.
“Before we close let us tell you that
near every town there are always sta
tioned forces of Filipino troops to whom,
should you so desire, you can present
yourselves with or without your rifles
and, to avoid danger, it is best to hide
it in a secure place, and after you have
presented yourself inform the Filipino of
ficer or chief of guerillas and they will
recover it and pay you some money in
return.
“With this we conclude, wishing you
the best of fortune.
“We remain yours sincerely.
[Signed] "HARRY HORAL AI.MAN.
Co. K.
“JOHN BRAKE,
Trumpeter, Co. B, Twenty-eighth U. S.
Infantry.
“FRANK R. CRARK,
Co. F, Twenty-first U. S. infantry.
“J. THOMAS KRE1DER,
Corporal Twenty-eighth R\ S. volun
teers.
“CHARI.ES BUCHANAN,
Co. B, Twenty-eighth U. S. volunteers.
“HARRY RICHTER,
Sixth RR S. artillery.
"CHARLES WRIGHT,
Hospital corps.
"FITZHUGH SMITH.
“JOHN RYAN,
Fourth regiment.”
How Gen. (nance \ u-h* It.
John T. Kreider, one of the signers
of this proclamation, was tried re
cently by military commission in the
Philippines on a charge of treason,
and the records of the court martial
have just been received at the war de
partment. The preponderance of
proof, said Gen. Chaffee, in review
ing the case, was in favor of the con
tention of the accused that he was
held by the insurgents as a prisoner
and took no part in operations
against the United States, gave no
aid and comfort to the enemy, made
reasonable effort to escape and was
compelled, by' his captors, under
duress to sign the above proclama
tion, by threats of violence, in case
he refused. “While no treasonable
intent or overt act is established
against the accused by competent,
evidence,” said Gen. Chaffee, “it., how
ever, remains to be remarked that is
the duty of the American soldier to
face impending danger of death rath
er than sign a treasonable proclama
tion, even if it be prepared, as was
the one in this case, by the enemy.
Nor should he do any other act that
might have even a semblance of giv
ing the enemy encouragement. The
true soldier not only takes the risks
of battle, but all other risks of life
growing out of any and all incidents
of war. and accepts the chance of life
or death rather than do aught to in
jure his country’s cause or dishonor
the uniform he wears.”
The military commission found
Kreider guilty of the charge of trea
son and sentenced him to confine
ment at hard labor for life, but Gen.
Chaffee, because of the absence of
conclusive proof that the accused
had committed an overt act (such an
act being necessary to consummate
the technical offense of treason), dis
approved the sentence and ordered
the prisoner set at liberty.
Netcotintlnjt with Ilnnditn.
Constantinople. Jan. 5.—The last
report regarding Miss Stone and
Mine. Tsilka is to the effect that the
brigands have agreed to accept $72,
500, and want the money before they
deliver over their prisoners. Mr.
Dickinson insists that the women be
set, free before the money is paid,
and thus the matter stands.
Mayor I.«>w Is Alert.
New York, Jan. 5.—Mayor Low has
discovered that Tammany is planning
to steal some of the fruits of the
fusion victory by the use of large
Bums of money in buying the support
of some of the fusion members of the
board of aldermen.
A NOTED PHYSICIAN
Makes an Important Statement
of Interest to All Women.
Dear Mrs. Pixkiiam :—The hon
est, intelligent physician is above the
1 School.' Whatever is best in each
case should be used, no matter to what
school a physician belongs. I, as a
matter of conscience, can only pre
DR. WAN AT A, of Lansing, Mich,
scribe the best, and as I know and bare
proven that there is nothing- in Materia
Medica which equals Lydia E. Pink
ham’s Vegetable Compound in
severe cases of female disorders, I
unhesitatingly prescribe it, and have
never yet been sorry. I know of noth
ing better for ovarian troubles and for
falling of the womb or ulcerations ; it
absolutely restores the affected parts
to their normal condition quicker and
better than anything else. I have
known it to cure barrenness in wo
men, who to-day are happy mothers of
children, and while the medical pro
fession looks down upon ‘ patents,’ I
have learned, instead, to look-up to
the healing potion, by whatever name
it be known. If my fellow physicians
dared tell the truth, hundreds of them
would voice my sentiments.”— Dr.
Wanata, Lansing, Mich.
fSOOO forfeit if above testimonial is not genuine.
The record of Lydia E. Pinlcham’s
Vegetable Compound cannot be
equalled. Accept no substitute.
Mrs. Pinkbam advises sick wo
men free. Address Lynn, Mass.
Elements of Greatness.
It is said that a great broker once told
his son that only two things were necessary
to make a great financier. “And what are
those, papa?” the son asked. “Honesty
and sagacity.” “But what do you consider
the mark of honesty to be?” ’“Always to
keep your word.” '“And the mark of sa
gacity?” "Never to give your word.”—Chi
cago Chronicle.
Some people would rather be consistent
than be right.—Chicago Daily News.
The best way to make people believe you
is to admit that you are a liar.—Washington
(la.) Democrat.
Notice that you seem to be “in the way”
oftener than you used to be? That is one
of the signs of old age.—Atchison Globe.
“Pa, what’s the difference between wit
and humor?” “You don’t need to use di
alect to make wit funny.”—Chicago Rec
ord-Herald.
There are two classes of unpopular men—
those who never think before speaking, and
those who never speak what they think.—
Town Topics.
She—“0! I just love architecture! Don’t
you?” lie—“No; it always seems to be
getting in my way. I’m learning to run an
automobile, you know.” — Philadelphia
Press.
Miss Featherweight—“I hope you are
feeling belter to-day, Mr. Boreliam?” Mr.
B.—“No, I’m very dull and low-spirited.”
Miss F.—“Ah, but you seem more yourself.”
—Punch.
“Why do you bring this to me?” thun
dered the weary editor, thrusting the MS.
back into the hands of the poet, "liec mse,”
replied the bard, timidly,“1 have no stump.”
—Boston Post.
“Joaksmith. it appears, is married and
has gone to housekeeping. “Not at all.
What made you think so?” “He’s been
writing so many jokes about servant girls
lately, he must have had some experience
with them.” “Nonsense! If he’d had such
experience he wouldn’t joke about it. —
Philadelphia Press.
“Dear me!” said the British belle, “I won
der if those horrid Yankee papers are dar
ing to insinuate that we have large feet.”
“Why, dear?” asked her friend. “Oh, I
was just reading one that said: 'The Ameri
can shoe lias invaded England, and the
British ladies are wearing large numbers.’ ”
—Philadelphia Record.
The Doctor'* Joke.
He was a horrid doctor, anyway, and no
gentleman, or he would not have been so
cruel to the fair young girl who sought his
aid. Hut even doctors are human and like
t0“jj>oetor,” she said, “I am afraid this cli
mate is too severe for me. I have such a
great trouble breathing with my lungs.
“You would have a great deal more
trouble breathing without them,' replied
the'cruel man, wit?! a loud, hoarse laugh.
The maiden shrunk from such a wicked
man, and fled as though pursued by a mouse.
—Boston Herald.___
Sore Sign of ■ Small Man.
"I can always tell a man who thinks he’s
great,” said a commercial traveler, facetious
ly, "by the way he speaks of other great
men. For instance, when he alludes to the
president as "Teddy,” to Chief Justice
Fuller as ‘Mel’ Fuller or to Senator Cullom
as ‘Shelly,’ I know he must be something of
a person, at least in his own estimation.
Such fellows, I imagine, had they lived in
Egypt at the time of the exodus, would have
spoken of ‘Mose’ and ‘Josh’ as familiarly
as if they were everyday companions.”—
Chicago Inter Ocean.
None There.
Tired of the long-winded oratory of the
attorney for the defense, the judge inter
rupted him.
"Mr. Sharke,” he said, “may I ask you a
question?” , ,
“Certainly, your honor. What is it?
“Language,” said the judge, “we are told,
is given to conceal thought, or words to that
effect. Inasmuch as you don’t seem to have
any thought to conceal, I would like^ to
know why you are talking.”—Chicago Trib
une. __
Striving to Please.
A New Jersey man, who was worried be
cause he felt that he could not provide prop
erly for his wife and five children, tried to
solve the problem by cutting his throat.
Some men will go to almost any extremes to
make things pleasant for the family.—
■Washington Post.
The most bitter arguments are those in
which neither person has any definite in
formation in regard to the subject.—Puck.
Jnat Like Her.
Mrs. Bombazine—O, I never have any
trouble in spelling correctly; but I’ll admit
that I make a mistake now and then
through carelessness.
Mrs-. Blunt—Yes; I remember the funny
mistake you made in asking for a berth in
the sleeping ear.
“How did I spell it? ‘Berth?’”—Boston
Transcript.
Dealing; In Pntnren.
“I hope,” said the young man who was
spending a few days at the seashore, "that
our engagement will not prove to be a mere
summer subterfuge.”
“I hope your hope comes out,” rejoined
the fair maid at his side, "but one can never
tell what effect frost will have on such
things.”—Chicago Daily News.
His Preference.
Head of Foreign Missionary Bureau—
\\ here would you prefer to locate as a mis
sionary?
Young Missionary—Well, if possible,
where the natives are vegetarians.—Brook
lyn Eagle.
l'navoidable Delay.
"What made you so late?”
“I came up in my automobile, and passed
here three times before 1 could manage to
stop.”—Smart Set.
Education in Caba.
Some idea of the important educational
reforms brought about and the wonderful
progress made since the island came under
American rule, can be obtained from their
exhibit at the Pan-American exposition re
cently, for which they were awarded nine
medals. There is also a wonderful record
back of Hostetter’s Stomach Bitters, and one
that has never been equalled. It is a spe
cific remedy for dyspepsia, indigestion^sick
headache and malaria, fever andague. Don’t
fail to try it.
Didn't Want It Pnlled Oat.
Mrs. Naggs—Don’t you know that wear
ing your hat in the house will cause your
hair to fall out?
Mr. Naggs—Yes; but then I prefer to lose
it that way.—Chicago Daily News.
The l’ernna Almanac.
The druggists have already been supplied
with Peruna almanacs. There is sure to be
a great demand for these almanacs on ac
count of the articles on astrology which they
contain. The subject of astrology is a very
attractive one to most people. The article's
on astrology in the Peruna almanac have
been furnished by a very competent astrol
ogisl, and the mental characteristics of each
sign is given, constituting almost a complete
horoscope. A list of lucky and unlucky days
for each month are given. There will be a
great rush for these books. Ask your drug
gist for one early before they are all gone.
An Explanation.
He—Your friend, Miss Dashaway, has
quite a military air about her.
She—No wonder. She has participated
in no fewer than 17 engagements.—Chicago
Daily News.
SEE SENATOR THURSTON,
The Brilliant Statesman from Nebraska, Makes
an Important Public Utterance.
. imum—ni:» ... Cl IT
1
INTERIOR OF UNITED STATES SENATE CHAMBER.
Ex-Senator John M. Thurston, of Omaha, Nebraska, is one of the most promi
nent and influential men in the country. He made the speech nominating
President McKinley at the St. Louis i invention, and was made permanent
Chairman of this convention. He was al ,o made Chairman of the convention
that re-nominated President McKinley at Philadelphia. He was recently
appointed by President McKinley Chairman of the St. Louis Exposition
Commission. .
This prominent gentleman recently wrote the following letter to The Peruna
Medicine Co., of Columbus, Ohio:
Washington, D. C., April 6, 1901.
“ I have used Peruna at various times during the past year or two with
most satisfactory results.
“It entirely relieved me from an irritating cough—the result of excess
ive effort in the presidential campaign, and I am a firm believer in its efficacy
for any such trouble.”—Jno. M. Thurston.
Catarrh has already become a na
tional curse. Its ravages extend from
ocean to ocean.
More than one-half of the people are
affected by it. It has become such a
seriovis matter that it has passed the
boundaries of the medical profession
and become a rational question. Sen
ators are talking about it; Congress
men are discussing it.
They are not only considering the
extent and chronic nature of the dis
ease, but the possibility of finding a na
tional remedy to meet this national ca
lamity.
The catarrh remedy, Peruna, seems
to be the main expectation in this di
rection.
Dr. Hartman, President of the Hart
man Sanitarium, devised the remedy,
Peruna, over forty years ago. and the
remedy as a catarrh cure has been
growing in favor steadily all these
years.
It stands to-day before the nation
as a thoroughly tested, accurately sci
entific internal remedy for catarrh.
There-are practically no medicinal
rivals in the field.
Peruna is not a local application or
temporary relief; it is a permanent
cure. Peruna is a systemic remedy.
It eradicates catarrh from the sys
tem. It cures catarrh wherever lo
cated. Its cures are radical and last
ing.
Therefore, Peruna is receiving the
indorsement of the leading statesmen
and history-makers of the day.
Address the Peruna Medicine Co.,
Columbus, O., for a book of testimon
ials, containing letters from prom
inent men. and women concerning
Peruna.
Appropriate.
A Sunday school teacher in Carthage, 111.,
has a class of little girls, and it is his c ustom
to tell them each Sunday of one little in
cident that has happened in the week, and
request the children to quote a verse of
Scripture to illustrate the story. In this
way she hopes to impress the usefulness of
Biblical knowledge upon the little ones.
One Sunday she told her class of a cruel
boy who would catch cats and cut off their
tails. “Now, can any little girl tell me of
an appropriate verse?” she asked.
There was a pause for a few moments,
when one of the little girls arose and in a
solemn voice said: “Whatsoever God has
Joined together let no man put asunder.”—
Detroit f ree Press.
A Joke on the Doctor.
Going into the free dispensary of the New
York Medical College and Hospital for
Women one afternoon a physician found
three or four little girls who, while await
ing treatment, had evidently made friends,
and were huddled together on one bench,
eagerly discussing something of great in
terest, which on investigation proved to be
a much handled “chunk” of candy. In as
tonishment he inquired what they were do
ing. Some questioning finally elicited an
explanation that "de one what tells de big
gest lie wins it.” “Oh,” said the doctor, "I
am ashamed of you. When I was little like
you I never told lies.” A slight pause, then
from the smallest girl: “Give him de can
dy.”—N. Y. Tribune.
Easily Interpreted.
Mrs. Iloon—I dreamed last night that
you had given me an automobile.
Mr. Hoon—H'm, yes! You had a horse
less nightmare—and, by the way, my dear,
dreams usually go by contraries.—Smart
Set.
( oach a child in the way he should go, and
when he is old he will not play off-side.—
Wrinkle.
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