How ■ Bidswise Dog Trots.
The place was the porch of the
store, the time was about 10 o’clock in
the morning of a summer day, the
people were the amiable loafers—and
Old Baumgartner. The person he was
discoursing about was his son Sepheni
jah. 1 am not sure that the name
■was not the ripe fruit of his father’s
fancy—with, perhaps, the Scriptural
suggestion which is likely to be pres
ent in the affairs of a Pennsylvania
German—whether a communicant or
not—even if he live in Maryland.
"Yas—always last; especial at fu
nerals and weddings. Except his own
•—he’s sure to be on time at his own
funeral. Right out in front! Hah?
Hut sometimes he misses his wedding.
Why. I knowed a feller—yous all
knowed him. begoshens!—that didn't
Bit there tell another feller'd married
her—’bout morn'n a year afterward.
Wasn’t it more'n a year, boys? Yas
-—Bill Elsenkrout. Or, now, was it his
brother—Baltzer Iron-Cabbage? Seems
io me now like it was Baltz. Some
sing wiss a B at the front end, any
how.”
Henry Wasserman diffidently inti
mated that there was a curious but
satisfactory element of safety in being
Jast—a “fastnacht" in their language,
In fact. Those in front were the ones
usually hurt in railroad accidents, Al
exander Althoff remembered.
"Safe?” cried the speaker. “Of
course! But for \vh> -say, for why?"
Old Baumgartner challenged defiantly.
No one answered ant! he let several
impressive minutes intervene.
“You don’t know! Hang you, none
of yous knows ! Well—because fie
ain't there when anysing occurs—al
ways a little late!"
They all agreed with him by a series
of sage nods.
“But, fellers, the worst is about
courting. It's no way to lit* always;
late. Everybody else gits there first,
and It's ncsslng for the fastnacht but
weeping and wailing and gnashing of
the teeth. And mebby the other feller
gits considerable happiness—and a
good farm.”
There was complaint in the old
man's voice, and (hey knew that he
meant his own son Seffy. To add to
their embarrassment, this same son
was now appearing over the Lustich
hill—an opportune moment for a
pleasing digression. For you must be
told early concerning Old Baumgart
ner's longing for certain lands, tene
ments and hereditaments—using bis
own phrase—which were not his own,
but which adjoined his. It had passed
into a proverb of the vicinage; indeed,
though the property in question be
longed to one Sarah Pressel, it was
known colloquially as “Baumgartner's j
Yearn."
The Badge of Honesty
Is on every wrapper of Doctor Pierce’s
Golden Medical Discovery because a full
list of the ingredients composing it is J
printed there in plain English. Forty |
years of experience has proven its superior
worth as a blood purifier and invlgorat- j
Ing tonic for the cure of stomach disorders
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down system as no other tonic can in
which alcohol is used. The active medic
inal principles of native roots such as
Golden Seal and Queen’s root, Stone and
^Mandrake root, Blood root and Black
<Cherrybark are extracted and preserved
by the use of chemically pure, triplo
■ refined glycerine. Send to Dr. R. V. Pierce
at Buffalo. N. V.. for free booklet which
quotes extracts from well-recognized med- |
leal authorities such as Drs. Bartholow,
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host of othepsf, show ing that these roots |
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.action l£ all weak states of the stomach, j
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f T)>e "C.oldcn Medical Discovery "makes
rltdi^ n ure ' hloo3~ a nd so 1 n v 1 gprates a nq
rt-cuTab-sxfTie~stomach. liver and bowels,
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Thus all skin affections, blotches, pimples
and eruptions as well as scrofulous swel
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sure their healing to apply to them Dr.
Pieree’s All-IIealing Salvo. If your drug
gist don’t happen to have this Salvo in
■took, send fifty-four cents in postage
Stamps to Dr. R. V. Pierce. Invalids’ Hptel
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a large box of the "All-Healing Salvo*
will reach you by return post.
You can’t afford to accept a secret nos
trum as a substitute for this non-alcohol ic,
medicine of known composition, not
even though the urgent dealer may
thereby make a little bigger profit.
I)r. Pierce’s Pleasant Pellets regulate
and invigorate stomach, liver and bowels.
Sugar-coated, tiny granules, easy to take
as candy.
And the reason of it was this: lie
tween his own farm and the public
road (and the railroad station when
it came) lay the fairest meadow-land
farmer's eye had ever rested upon.
(I am speaking again for the father
of Seffy and with his hyperbole.)
Save in one particular, it was like an
enemy’s beautiful territory lying be
t%veen one's less beautiful own and the
open sea—keeping one a poor inlander
who is mad for the seas—whose crops
must either pass across the land of his
adversary and pay tithes to him. or
go by long distances around him at the
cost of greater tithes to the soulless
owners of the turnpikes—who aggra
vatingly fix a gate each way to make
their tithes more sure. So, l say, it
was like having the territory of his
enemy lying between him and deep
water—’Save, as I have also said, in
one particular, to wit: that the owner
—the Sarah Pressel I have mentioned
—was not Old Baumgartner's enemy.
In fact, they were tremendous
friends. And it was by this friendship
—and one other thing which 1 mean to
mention later—that Old Baumgartner
hoped, before he died, to attain the
wish of his life, and see, not only the
Elysiau pasture-field, but the whole
of the adjoining farm, with the line
fences down, a part of his. The other
thing I promised to mention as an aid
to this ambition—was Seffy. And,
since the said Sarah was of nflbrly the
same age as Seffy. perhaps i need
not explain further, except to say that
the only obstruction the old man could
see now to acquiring title by marriage
was—Seffy himself. He was, and al
ways had been, afraid of girls—es
pecially such aggressive, flirtatious,
pretty and tempestuous girls as this
Sarah.
i uese iniugs, nowever, were nereai
tarv with the girl. It was historical,
in fact, that, during the life of Sarah's
good-looking father, so importunate
had been Old Baumgartner for the
purchase of at least the meadow—
he could not have ventured at that
time—and so obstinate had b*sen the
father of the present owner—• he had
red hair precisely as his laughter
had)—that they had come blows
about it to the discomfiture of Old
Baumgartner; and, afterward, they did
not speak. Yet, when the loafers at
the store laughed, Baumgartner swore
that be would, nevertheless, have that
pasture before he died.
But, then, as if fate, too, were
against him, the railroad was built
and Us station was placed so that th»
Pressel farm lay directly between it
and him, and of course the "life" went
more and more in the direction of the
station—left him more and more “out
of it"—and made him poorer and poor
er, and Pressel richer and richer. Adc'
when the store laughed at that, Baum
gartner swore that he would possess
half of the farm before he died; and
as Pressel and his wife died, and Seffy
grew up, and as he noticed the fond
ness of the little red-headed girl for
his little tow-headed boy, he added to
his adjuration that he would he har
rowing that whole farm before he
died—without paying a cent for it!
But both Seffy and Sally had grown
to a marriageable age without any
thing happening. Seffy had become in
ordinately shy, while the coquettish
Sally had accepted the attentions of
Sant Pritz, the clerk at the store, as
an antagonist more worthy of her,
and in a fashion which sometimes
made the father of Seffy swear and
lose his temper—with Seffy. Though,
of course, in the final disposition of
the matter, he was sure that no girl
so nice as Sally would marry such a
person as Sam Pritz, with no ex
tremely visible means of support—a
salary of $4 a week, and an odious rep
utation for liquor. And it was for
these things, all of which were known
(for Baumgartner had not a single
secret) that the company at the store
detected the personal equation in Old
Baumgartner's communications.
Seffy had almost arrived by this
time, and Sally was In the store! With
Sam! The situation was highly dra
matic. But the old man consummate
ly ignored this complication and di
rected ettention to his son. For him,
the molasses-tapper did not exist.
The fact is he was overjoyed. Seffy,
for once in bis life, would be on time!
He would do the rest.
“Now, boys, chust look at 'em!
Dogged if they ain't bose like one an
other! How's the proferb? Birds of a
feather flock wiss one another? I
dunno. Anyhow. Sef flocks wiss Betz
constant. And they understand one
another good. Trotting Uve a side
wise dog of a hot summer's day!" And
he showed the comi»any, up and down
the store porch just how a sidewise
dog would be likely to trot on a hot
summer day—and then laughed joy
ously.
If there had been an artist eye to
see they would have been well worth
its while—Seffy and the mare so af
fectionately disparaged. And, after
all. I am not sure that the speaker
himself had not an artist's eye. For
a spring pasture, or a fallow upland,
or a drove of goodly cows deep in his
clover. I know be had. (Perhaps you.
too, have?) And this was his best
mare and his only son.
The big bay, clad in broad-banded
harness, soft with oil and glittering
with brasses, was shambling indolent
ly down the bill, resisting her own
momentum bv the diagonal motion
the old man had likened to a dog's
sidewise trot. The looped trace-chains
were jingling a merry dithyramb, her
head was nodding, her tail swgying,
and Seffy, propped by his elbow on
her broad back, one leg swung be
tween the hames. the other keeping
time on her ribs, was singing:
“I want to be an angel
And with the angels stand,
A crown upon my forehead
A harp within my hand—”
His adoring father chuckled. "I
wonder what for kind of anchel he’d
make, anyhow? And Betz—they'll
have to go together. Say, I wonder if
it is horse-anchels?”
No one knew; no one offered a sug
gestion.
“Well, it ought to be. Say—he ken
perform circus wiss ol' Betz!”
They expressed their polite sur
prise at this for perhaps the hun
dredth time.
“Yas—they have a kind of circus
ring in the barnyard. He stands on
one foot then on another, and on his
hands wiss his feet kicking, and then
he says words—like hokey-pokey—
and Betz sh|} kicks up behind and
throws him off in the dung and we all
laugh—happy efer after—Betz most of
> all!”
After the applause he said:
“I guess I'd better wake 'em up!
What you sink?"
They one and all thought he had.
They knew he would do it, no matter
what they thought. His method, as I
usual, was his own. He stepped to!
the adjoining field, and, selecting a
clod with the steely polish of the plow
share upon it, threw it at the mare.
It struck her on the rlank. She gather
ed her feet under her in sudden alarm,
then slowly relaxed, looked slyly for
the old man. found him. and under
standing. suddenly wheeled and am
bled off home, leaving Seffy prone on .
the ground as her part of the joke.
The old man brought Seffy in tri- ]
umph to the store-porch.
"Chus# stopped you afore you got
to be a anehel!” he was saying. "We
couldn't bear to sink about you being
a anehel—an’ wiss the anchels stand
—a harp upon your forehead, a crown
within your hand. I expect—when it's
.corn-planting time.”
Seffy grinned cheerfully, brushed off
the dust and contemplated his father’s
watch—held accusingly against him.
Old Baumgartner went on gaily.
"About an inch and a half apast
ten! Seffy, I'm glad you ain't break
ing your reputation for being fast
nachich. Chust about a quarter of an
inch too late for ihe prize wiss flour
on its hair and arms and its frock
pinned up to showr its new petticoat!
Uhu! It 1 had such a nice petti
coat—” he imitated the lady in ques
tion, to the tremendous delight of the
gentle loafers.
Seffy stared a little and rubbed
some dust out of his eyes. He was
pleasant but dull.
"Yassir, Sef. if you'd a-got yere at a
inch and a quarter apast! Now Sam's
got her. Down in the cellar a-licking
molasses together! Doggone if Sam
don’t git eferyslng—except his due
bills. He don’t want to be no anehel
tell he dies. He's got fun enough yere
—but Seffy—you're like the flow of
molasses in January—at courting.”
This oblique suasion made no im
pression on Seffy. It is doubtful if he
understood it at all. The loafers be
gan to smile. One laughed. The old
man checked him with a threat of per
sonal harm.
' Hold on there, Jefferson Dafis Bus
by,” he chid. I don't allow no one
to laugh at my Seffy—except chust me
—account I'm his daddy. It’s a fight
word the next time you do it.”
(To be continued.)
MORE POWER TO JOHNSON.
He Is a Man Who Has Risen on His \
Merits.
Hon. John A. Johnson has risen
from the ranks on his merits. He has
wen a fair degree of material prosper
ity. not by the reckless arts of a dema
gogue, but by the constructive work of
a citizen who grows up in and with
his country.
He has political power because he
has deserved public confidence. How '
ever any of us may disagree with some
of his political ideas, he is recognized
by all who have taken the trouble to
learn anything about him as a man ol
A Dollar
spent at home reacts in its benefits
*-ith unceasing general profit.
Sent out of town it's life is ended.
Kept with the home merchants it is a messenger of continuous
benefit Business men should awake to the importance of keeping
this dollar at home and make a bid for it by judicious advertising.
sound and sincere character.
He is a self-made man who is well
made—who has done a goo.i job in
the making of himself. As to his
general attitude toward the questions
of the day, it is enough to say that
he is not a man who believes in burn
ing the barn to kill tl.e rats.
He is exactly the kind of man tiU.t
what Mr. Bryan calls "the plain !>1 --
I ie” are glad to see come tor war ;
for high office. They recognize him
as on<- of themselves and are proud
of him with good reason.
John A. Johnson of Minnesota is
doing what lie can. More power to
him and to ail like him. The republic
needs the help of all of them.—Chi
cago Inter Ocean.
Human Life in the Future.
“The hath of the n«=*xt century,"
says T. Baron Russell in his book, “A
Hundred Years Hence,” “will lave the
body speedily with oxygenated water
delivered with a force that ■will len
der rubbing unnecessary, and beside
it will stand the drying cupboard,
lined with some quickly moving ar
rangement of soft brushes, and fed
with a highly desiccated air, from
which, almost in a moment, * the
bather will emerge, dried, and with a
skin gently stimulated, and perhaps
electrified, to clothe himself quickly
and pass down the lift to his break
fast, which he will eat to the accom
paniment of a summary of the morn
ing's news read out for the benefit
of the family, or whispered into his
i ears by a talking machine.”
THE REV. IRL R. HICKS
Almanac and Magazine
Should be in
every home in
the land. His
weather predic
tionscanbehad
only in his own
publica ti on s.
No other publisher is permitted to
print them in any form, either with or
without credit. His 1908 Almanac ex
cels all former editions in beauty and
value, and sells for35cents, postpaid.
Elis monthly-winagazine, Word and
Works, confllins his weather fore
casts for each month, together with a
vast amount of the best family reading
and costs $1. a year, one almanac with
each subscription. Every earthquake
and serious storm for 20 years has
been predicted by Prof. Hicks. *• You
cannot afford to be without these pub*
lications.* Address all orders to
THE JOURNAL
Newark, : : Arkansas
There’s a Way
To defeat the mail order man’s env
throat ihethoda in this community.
The way ia publicity for your business
it’s the same way he uses. Oui
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A
A Bargain for our
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The
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»TIHE NEW IDEA WOMAN’S MAGAZINE Is the best of all
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