could you rewrite the first few paragraphs of 'The Hobbit' by JRR Tolkien using generation Z slang, with words such as "cringe", "rizz" or "bussin"?

Here are the first few lines, for reference: "In a hole in the ground there lived a hobbit. Not a nasty, dirty, wet hole, filled with the ends of worms and an oozy smell, nor yet a dry, bare, sandy hole with nothing in it to sit down on or to eat: it was a hobbit-hole, and that means comfort."
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