You are a product of your environment, here is why:
We live a society which expects us to beautiful, strong, intelligent and powerful all at once. The minute we show a flaw or make a mistake, we are judged and compared to others who do it better.
Most parents use comparison as motivation, not realising that they are instilling inferiority in their children. Underneath the comparison echoes the question ‘why can’t you be like them’. This essentially means that the people we are being compared to are somehow perfect, and we lack. If you think that there is something wrong with you, there isn’t. You were just raised to believe that others were better than you.
Early childhood has the biggest impact on a person’s growth and life. Our early childhood experiences shape and influence our thoughts, behaviour and attitude. Most people experience comparison from an early age. These people then grow up with this mindset and continue to instil it in other generations. This creates a continuous cycle of comparison, which is toxic in nature.
The ideals and values we learn from our childhood become part of our psyche. Even in adult life, we live by judging ourselves against what we have learnt. When we see someone else doing better than us, we begin to compare ourselves to them and think that there is something wrong with us.
The next time you feel like there is something wrong with you, take time to think it through and try to discover the reasons behind your thoughts.For instance, take a moment and ask yourself what it is about the person or situation that makes you feel that way. You can overcome self-pity or moping by changing your mindset. Adopt positive self-talk and mantras to help you shift from the idea that there’s something wrong with you.
Human beings are all flawed. There is always something wrong with this and that person. Embrace your flaws and once you fully start to do so, no one can use them against you.
"""Wewe ni bidhaa ya mazingira yako, hapa ni kwa nini: Tunaishi katika jamii ambayo inatutegemea kuwa mzuri, nguvu, akili na nguvu wakati wote." Wakati tunapoonyesha kasoro au kufanya kosa, tunahukumiwa na kulinganishwa na wengine ambao hufanya vizuri zaidi. Wazazi wengi hutumia kulinganisha kama kichocheo, bila kutambua kwamba wanawafundisha watoto wao kuwa duni. Chini ya kulinganisha inaonyesha swali <unk>kwa nini huwezi kuwa kama wao<unk>. Hii inamaanisha kwamba watu ambao tunalinganishwa nao ni wakamilifu, na sisi tunakosa. Ikiwa unafikiri kwamba kuna kitu kibaya nawe, hakuna. Ulikulia ukiamini kuwa wengine ni bora kuliko wewe. Utoto wa mapema una athari kubwa zaidi kwa ukuaji na maisha ya mtu. Maono yetu ya utotoni huunda na kuathiri mawazo yetu, tabia na mtazamo. Watu wengi hupata kulinganishwa tangu utotoni. Watu hawa kisha kukua na mawazo haya na kuendelea kuingiza katika vizazi vingine. Hilo huanzisha mzunguko wa kuendelea wa kulinganisha, ambao ni wenye sumu. Maadili na kanuni ambazo tumezoea katika maisha yetu ya utotoni zinakuwa sehemu ya maisha yetu ya kiroho. Hata katika maisha ya watu wazima, tunaishi kwa kujihukumu wenyewe dhidi ya kile ambacho tumejifunza. Tunapoona mtu mwingine akifanya vizuri kuliko sisi, tunaanza kujilinganisha naye na kufikiri kwamba kuna kitu kibaya kwetu. Wakati mwingine unapohisi kuna kitu kibaya kwako, chukua muda kufikiria na kujaribu kugundua sababu za mawazo yako, kwa mfano, chukua muda na kujiuliza ni nini kuhusu mtu au hali inayokufanya uhisi hivyo. Unaweza kushinda hisia za kujisikitisha au huzuni kwa kubadilisha mtazamo wako. Kuchukua chanya binafsi-mazungumzo na mantras kukusaidia kuhamia kutoka wazo kwamba kuna kitu kibaya na wewe. Wanadamu wote wana kasoro. Sikuzote kuna jambo lisilofaa kumhusu mtu huyu au huyo. Kukumbatia kasoro zako, na mara tu unapozindua kabisa kufanya hivyo, hakuna mtu anayeweza kuzitumia dhidi yako.