Life can be complicated. A few months ago, you felt like you were being extremely productive. You would visit the gym regularly, stick to your healthy eating habits, make achievements at your workplace, and were even getting quality sleep each night. You felt motivated enough to take on any task that came your way and even executed it to perfection.
But all of a sudden, everything is dull and bleak. You got too tired of the hectic schedule and you slipped, making you go down a rabbit hole of demotivation and procrastination. Maybe you suffered from the loss of a relationship, an illness, an injury, or a significant setback. Now, you only find yourself thinking negatively because you feel as though all the progress you had made is now ruined.
However, when things don’t work out, there are things you could do to get your life back on track. Many religions and traditions state that in the end, you will be happy. If you aren’t happy, then it is not the end.
But how does one find the motivation to start all over again when things don’t work out? Simple: you go back to the basics.
What Is Control?
When things don’t work out, the first thought that comes to mind is how to begin from scratch. But before you start figuring that out, it is important to know what control is.
Does control mean having a good work-life balance? Or does control refer to being a quick decision-maker?
The thing is that control can be subjective. Having ‘control’ over your life is important, but it may not always mean the same thing for two different people.
Taking control of your life means that you are self-aware and confident enough to embark on new journeys. This control allows you to feel motivated enough to believe that if you invest your hard work into something, you will reap great results.
While it is impossible to control all the external factors around you, it is possible to control how you feel about them. Taking control of your life begins with your thoughts and emotions—internal factors—which later translate into controlling your surroundings or external factors as well.
When things don’t work out according to plan, we feel as if everything is out of control. To avoid this, we must remember that taking control is a choice that we make for ourselves and that we can exercise that control over our lives whenever and however we wish.
12 Ways of Gaining Control When Things Don’t Work Out
So, what do you do when things don’t work out and you feel as though you have lost control? You gain it back.
Here are 12 simple ways you can get your life back on track.
1. Reflect Upon Yourself
A thorough life audit can clear your perspective. Since it enables you to focus on each area of your life separately, it gives you a better picture of where you stand at the moment. While you reflect upon your life, remember to include aspects such as your career, relationships, family, psychological and physical health, fitness, and overall motivation. This gives you more clarity regarding where you are and where you want to be in the future.
While you could carry out this reflection yourself, there are also many tools available to aid you in this life audit process. The Wheel of Life focuses on a diagram method to evaluate your life, but there are also multiple different lists of questions available to assess your situation.
2. Identify the Cause of Failure
You had your life on right on track—then what happened? Before you restart your pursuit of motivation and productivity, you must identify the cause of what led to your downfall in the first place. This serves as an extremely important factor in the healing process, especially to ensure that you don’t repeat the same mistakes.
If you dig deep enough, you will find that some common triggers led to your spiral of negativity. Once you reflect on these triggers and what causes them, avoiding them becomes much easier. This way, you can easily get your life back on track when things don’t work out perfectly.
3. Be Confident
Confidence is the key to your success, especially when it comes to having control over your life. While showing up for work every day is important, showing up to achieve something is much more important.
When things don’t work out perfectly and continue to spread far beyond your control, it can be because of your lack of physical and mental confidence. To regain your confidence, think about the things that provide you with the most confidence and engage in habits that correlate to that. For instance, if you feel confident when you are physically healthy, go to the gym to retain your fitness.
For a clear mind, you must have a clear plan. On average, every individual has around 70,000 thoughts per day. While it is impossible to keep a close record of every single one, it is highly recommended to list down some of the thoughts that are most important to you.
This may be a thought about cooking pasta for dinner tomorrow or that work meeting you have been constantly rescheduling. Maybe it is a project idea you had right before you went to sleep, or maybe it is about that old friend that you thought of while you sip your coffee.
This method of brain dumping will help you bring important ideas and tasks onto paper while making room for your mind to focus on each item individually.
5. Condition Your Mind
When things don’t work out, you may think that you need to start building your good habits back again from scratch. However, that is not true. There are many habits and routines that one follows subconsciously—and you can easily make use of your current habits to restart different sorts of healthy behavior to gain control over your life again.
For instance, if your current routine is to come home from work, change into comfortable clothing, and watch Netflix—you can use that to condition your brain into a new habit. By changing into workout clothes instead, you may be motivated enough to head to the gym before getting to that TV series.
6. Start From Little Things
Each droplet makes an ocean. When things don’t work out optimally in life, remember that you still have control over the tiny little things that are around you. This could be as insignificant as organizing your drawer or cleaning your house—but it will surely help you regain control over your life. Remember that even tiny things can accumulate into massive life-changing momentum.
7. Be Patient
When things don’t work out, it can be very tempting to get back on track as soon as possible. As a result, you may find yourself rushing through everything and trying to do too much too fast. However, it is time to slow down and be patient with yourself. If you have lost control over your diet, it is easier to get back on track by starting to track calories again instead of meal prep and strict diets.
8. Remember Your Purpose
Self-awareness is necessary. To regain control over your life after you have slipped once, you need to take a step back and reflect upon the purpose of why you wanted control in the first place. Even in the harshest of weather, trees still stand still. This is because they have strong roots—or a strong purpose.
Magical sayings are essential for reminding yourself that even if you don’t know how what you’re hoping for will appear in your life, everything is possible—something that can be easily forgotten when things are not working out.
When things don’t work out perfectly, go back to finding your purpose and why you started. Let that bring you back to gaining control over your life.
9. Time Management
This is an important life skill that takes years to master but is necessary for getting your life back on track. One of the possible reasons why you slipped in the first place could be because you were too overwhelmed by your surroundings. If there are too many things on your mind at once, you are subject to a mental breakdown sooner or later.
To avoid that, you need to focus on managing your time more efficiently and stressing yourself out less. While it is okay to engage in multiple projects, remember to be moderate with rationing your time, and be responsible enough to keep some time for your self as well.
10. Create Healthy Boundaries
Regaining control over your life requires you to prioritize the things that are most important to you and discarding the few that only stress you out. To do this effectively, it is recommended to set healthy boundaries around yourself that help you focus solely on the important things in life.
When things don’t work out, it is okay to feel overwhelmed. One of the easiest ways to relax is by taking a long walk and reconnecting with the outdoors. Don’t focus on your speed, distance, or surroundings—just breathe and focus on yourself for this moment.
12. Give Yourself Time
When things don’t work out and you spiral down that hole of negativity, you could be quick to start blaming yourself for everything. As a result, you may also feel pressured to get back on track immediately.
However, you need to give yourself time. Healthy routines are built through consistency and patience, constant reevaluations, and learning how to do things differently. Since this process may take time, you need to be kind to yourself.
While there is no single solution to getting your life back on track immediately, you should know that there are multiple smaller steps you can take towards achieving your ultimate goal. Just follow these 12 ways of gaining control when things don’t work out, and you will eventually feel the improvement in your quality of life. After all, having control over our lives is the key to feeling content.
What You Can Do When Things Don’t Work Out
- How to Control Your Thoughts and Be the Master of Your Mind
- Your Life Is a Mess? How to Fix It and Turn Things Around
- How to Be Patient and Take Charge of Your Life
Featured photo credit: Jamie Street via unsplash.com
Maisha yanaweza kuwa magumu. Miezi michache iliyopita, ulihisi kama ulikuwa na uzalishaji mkubwa. Unatembelea mazoezi ya mwili mara kwa mara, unaendelea na tabia zako za kula, unafanya kazi nzuri, na unalala vizuri kila usiku. Ulikuwa na nia ya kufanya kazi yoyote uliyopaswa kufanya na hata ulifanya kazi hiyo kwa ukamilifu. Lakini kwa ghafula, kila kitu kinakuwa chenye kuchosha na chenye kuhuzunisha. Ulikuwa na uchovu wa ratiba ya shughuli nyingi na ulikosa, na hivyo ukaingia katika shimo la sungura la kukosa msukumo na kuchelewesha. Labda umepatwa na hasara ya uhusiano, ugonjwa, jeraha, au kushindwa kwa kiasi fulani. Sasa, unajikuta ukifikiria vibaya kwa sababu unahisi kana kwamba maendeleo yote uliyofanya sasa yameharibiwa. Hata hivyo, mambo yanaposhindwa, kuna mambo unayoweza kufanya ili kurudisha maisha yako kwenye njia sahihi. Dini nyingi na desturi zinaamini kwamba mwishowe, mtu atakuwa na furaha. Ikiwa wewe si mwenye furaha, basi si mwisho. Lakini mtu hupataje kichocheo cha kuanza tena wakati mambo hayana kazi? Ni rahisi: kurudi kwenye msingi. Udhibiti Ni Nini? Mambo yanaposhindwa, wazo la kwanza linalokuja akilini ni jinsi ya kuanza upya. Kabla ya kuanza kufanya hivyo, ni muhimu kujua ni nini. Je, kudhibiti mambo kunamaanisha kuwa na usawaziko mzuri kati ya kazi na maisha? Au je, udhibiti unarejelea kuwa mteuzi wa haraka wa maamuzi? Jambo ni kwamba udhibiti unaweza kuwa wa kibinafsi. Kuwa na "udhibiti" juu ya maisha yako ni muhimu, lakini inaweza kuwa si daima maana kitu kimoja kwa watu wawili tofauti. Kuchukua udhibiti wa maisha yako inamaanisha kuwa unajijua na una uhakika wa kutosha kuanza safari mpya. Udhibiti huu unakuwezesha kuhisi kuhamasishwa vya kutosha kuamini kwamba ikiwa utawekeza kazi yako ngumu katika kitu, utavuna matokeo mazuri. Ingawa haiwezekani kudhibiti mambo yote ya nje yanayokuzunguka, ni rahisi kudhibiti jinsi unavyohisi kuhusu mambo hayo. Kuchukua udhibiti wa maisha yako huanza na mawazo yako na hisia - mambo ya ndani - ambayo baadaye hutafsiriwa katika kudhibiti mazingira yako au mambo ya nje pia. Mambo yanapokosa kufanywa kulingana na mpango, tunahisi kana kwamba kila kitu hakidhibitiwi. Ili kuepuka hili, ni lazima tukumbuke kwamba kuchukua udhibiti ni chaguo tunalojifanyia sisi wenyewe na kwamba tunaweza kutumia udhibiti huo juu ya maisha yetu wakati wowote na jinsi tunavyotaka. Njia 12 za Kupata Udhibiti Wakati Mambo Hayana Kufanya Kazi Kwa hiyo, Unafanya Nini Wakati Mambo Hayana Kufanya Kazi na Unahisi Kama Umepoteza Udhibiti? Unaipata tena. Hapa kuna njia 12 rahisi za kurudisha maisha yako kwenye njia ya kawaida. 1. Uwe na mtazamo wa kweli Jifunze kuhusu maisha yako kwa uangalifu na utaona mambo kwa njia iliyo wazi. Kwa kuwa inakuwezesha kuzingatia kila sehemu ya maisha yako kando, inakupa picha bora ya mahali ulipo kwa sasa. Unapofikiria maisha yako, kumbuka kujumuisha mambo kama vile kazi yako, mahusiano, familia, afya ya kisaikolojia na kimwili, mazoezi, na msukumo wa jumla. Hii inakupa uwazi zaidi kuhusu mahali ulipo na mahali unayotaka kuwa katika siku zijazo. Ingawa unaweza kufanya tafakari hii mwenyewe, kuna pia zana nyingi zinazopatikana kukusaidia katika mchakato huu wa ukaguzi wa maisha. Mzunguko wa Maisha ni njia ya kuchora picha ya maisha ya mtu, na pia ina orodha ya maswali ya kuelezea hali ya maisha. 2. Uwezekano wa kupata Kutambua Sababu ya Kushindwa Ulikuwa na maisha yako juu ya haki juu ya kufuatilia <unk> kisha nini kilichotokea? Kabla ya kuanza tena kufuatilia motisha na uzalishaji, lazima utambue sababu ya nini kilichokuongoza kwenye kuanguka kwako. Hii hutumika kama sababu muhimu sana katika mchakato wa uponyaji, hasa kuhakikisha kwamba huwezi kurudia makosa yaleyale. Ukichimba kina kirefu, utagundua kuwa baadhi ya visababishi vya kawaida viliongoza kwenye mzunguko wako wa hasi. Mara tu unapofikiria mambo hayo na visababishi vyake, inakuwa rahisi zaidi kuepuka matatizo hayo. Kwa njia hii, unaweza kwa urahisi kupata maisha yako nyuma juu ya kufuatilia wakati mambo si kazi nje kikamilifu. 3. Uwe na mtazamo wa kweli Kuwa na ujasiri ni ufunguo wa mafanikio yako, hasa linapokuja suala la kuwa na udhibiti juu ya maisha yako. Ingawa ni muhimu kwenda kazini kila siku, ni muhimu zaidi kufika kazini ili kutimiza jambo fulani. Mambo yanaposhindwa na kuendelea kuenea mbali zaidi ya uwezo wako wa kudhibiti, huenda ikawa ni kwa sababu ya ukosefu wako wa uhakika wa kimwili na kiakili. Ili kupata tena ujasiri wako, fikiria juu ya vitu vinavyokupa ujasiri zaidi na kushiriki katika mazoea yanayohusiana na hilo. Kwa mfano, ikiwa unajisikia kuwa na uhakika wakati una afya nzuri, nenda kwenye mazoezi ili uendelee kuwa na afya nzuri. Ili uwe na akili iliyo wazi, ni lazima uwe na mpango ulio wazi. Kwa wastani, kila mtu ana mawazo 70,000 kwa siku. Ingawa haiwezekani kuweka rekodi ya kila moja, inashauriwa sana kuorodhesha baadhi ya mawazo muhimu zaidi kwako. Huenda ikawa ni wazo la kupika pasta kwa ajili ya chakula cha jioni kesho au mkutano wa kazi ambao umekuwa ukibadili ratiba mara kwa mara. Labda ni wazo la mradi ulilokuwa nalo kabla ya kulala, au labda ni kuhusu rafiki huyo wa zamani uliyemfikiria wakati unakunywa kahawa yako. Njia hii ya kuondoa ubongo itakusaidia kuweka mawazo na kazi muhimu kwenye karatasi wakati wa kutoa nafasi kwa akili yako kuzingatia kila kitu moja kwa moja. 5. Uwe na mtazamo mzuri. Hali ya Akili Yako Wakati mambo hayana kazi nje, unaweza kufikiri kwamba unahitaji kuanza kujenga mazoea yako mazuri nyuma tena kutoka mwanzo. Hata hivyo, hilo si kweli. Kuna tabia nyingi na utaratibu kwamba moja ifuatavyo subconsciously <unk> na unaweza kwa urahisi kufanya matumizi ya tabia yako ya sasa kuanza tena aina mbalimbali ya tabia ya afya ya kupata udhibiti juu ya maisha yako tena. Kwa mfano, kama utaratibu wako wa sasa ni kuja nyumbani kutoka kazi, kubadilisha katika nguo starehe, na kuangalia Netflix <unk> unaweza kutumia kwamba hali ubongo wako katika tabia mpya. Kwa kubadilisha nguo za mazoezi, unaweza kuwa na msukumo wa kutosha kwenda kwenye mazoezi kabla ya kufika kwenye mfululizo huo wa televisheni. 6. Uwe na uhakika Anza Kutoka Mambo Madogo Kila tone hufanya bahari. Wakati mambo hayafanyi kazi vizuri katika maisha, kumbuka kwamba bado una udhibiti juu ya vitu vidogo vidogo ambavyo viko karibu nawe. Hii inaweza kuwa ndogo kama kupanga droo yako au kusafisha nyumba yako - lakini hakika itakusaidia kupata udhibiti wa maisha yako. Kumbuka kwamba hata mambo madogo-madogo yanaweza kuunganishwa na kuwa nguvu kubwa ya kubadili maisha. 7. Uwe na mtazamo gani? Uwe na Subira Mambo yanaposhindwa, huenda ukavutiwa sana kurudi kwenye utaratibu haraka iwezekanavyo. Kama matokeo, unaweza kujikuta ukikimbilia kila kitu na kujaribu kufanya mengi sana haraka sana. Hata hivyo, ni wakati wa kupunguza mwendo na kuwa mstahimilivu. Ikiwa umepoteza udhibiti wa lishe yako, ni rahisi kurudi kwenye njia ya kawaida kwa kuanza kufuatilia kalori tena badala ya maandalizi ya chakula na lishe kali. 8. Uwe na mtazamo gani? Kumbuka Kusudi Lako Kujitambua ni muhimu. Ili kupata tena udhibiti wa maisha yako baada ya kuanguka mara moja, unahitaji kuchukua hatua nyuma na kutafakari juu ya kusudi la nini unataka udhibiti katika nafasi ya kwanza. Hata katika hali mbaya zaidi ya hewa, miti bado inasimama. Hii ni kwa sababu wana mizizi yenye nguvu au kusudi lenye nguvu. Maneno ya kichawi ni muhimu kwa kujikumbusha kwamba hata kama hujui jinsi kile unachotarajia kitaonekana katika maisha yako, kila kitu kinawezekana - kitu ambacho kinaweza kusahaulika kwa urahisi wakati mambo hayafanyi kazi. Mambo yanaposhindwa, rudi tena na uone kusudi lako na kwa nini ulianza. Acha hilo likurudishe kwenye udhibiti wa maisha yako. 9. (a) Kwa nini? Usimamizi wa wakati ni ujuzi muhimu ambao huchukua miaka kuufahamu lakini ni muhimu ili kurudisha maisha yako kwenye njia sahihi. Moja ya sababu za kuanguka kwako ni kwa sababu umevurugika sana na mazingira yako. Ikiwa una mambo mengi sana akilini mwako kwa wakati mmoja, mapema au baadaye utapatwa na mshtuko wa akili. Ili kuepuka hali hiyo, unahitaji kutumia wakati wako kwa njia inayofaa na kupunguza mkazo. Ingawa ni sawa kushiriki katika miradi mingi, kumbuka kuwa wastani na kugawa wakati wako, na kuwa na jukumu la kutosha kuweka wakati kwa ajili yako mwenyewe pia. Kumi. Kuanzisha mipaka ya afya: Kupata tena udhibiti wa maisha yako inahitaji kuweka vipaumbele vitu ambavyo ni muhimu zaidi kwako na kuondoa vitu vichache ambavyo vinakufadhaisha tu. Ili kufanya hivyo kwa ufanisi, inashauriwa kuweka mipaka yenye afya karibu na wewe mwenyewe ambayo hukusaidia kuzingatia tu mambo muhimu maishani. Mambo yanaposhindwa, ni sawa kuhisi kuwa umechanganyikiwa. Njia rahisi ya kupumzika ni kutembea kwa muda mrefu na kufurahia mazingira. Usikazie fikira mwendo wako, umbali, au mazingira yako - pumua tu na kujishughulisha na wewe mwenyewe kwa wakati huu. 12. (a) Kwa nini? Jipe Wakati Wakati mambo yanaposhindwa na unapotembea chini ya shimo hilo la hasi, unaweza kuanza kujilaumu kwa kila kitu. Kwa hiyo, huenda ukahisi kwamba unalazimika kurudi kwenye njia sahihi mara moja. Hata hivyo, unahitaji kujitolea wakati. Mazoea mazuri ya maisha hujengwa kwa kuendelea na subira, kuchunguza mambo mara kwa mara, na kujifunza jinsi ya kufanya mambo kwa njia tofauti. Kwa kuwa mchakato huu unaweza kuchukua muda, unahitaji kuwa mwenye fadhili kwako mwenyewe. Ingawa hakuna suluhisho moja ya kurudisha maisha yako kwenye njia ya haraka, unapaswa kujua kuwa kuna hatua ndogo nyingi ambazo unaweza kuchukua kufikia lengo lako la mwisho. Fuata tu njia hizi 12 za kupata udhibiti wakati mambo hayafanyi kazi, na hatimaye utahisi uboreshaji katika ubora wako wa maisha. Baada ya yote, kuwa na udhibiti juu ya maisha yetu ni ufunguo wa kuhisi kuridhika. Unaweza Kufanya Nini Wakati Mambo Hayana Kufanya Kazi - Jinsi ya Kudhibiti Mawazo Yako na Kuwa Msimamizi wa Akili Yako - Maisha Yako Ni Mchafuko? Jinsi ya kurekebisha na kubadilisha mambo - Jinsi ya kuwa na subira na kuchukua jukumu la maisha yako Featured picha mikopo: Jamie Street kupitia unsplash.com