def METHOD_NAME():
    """The main function. Hier spielt die Musik.
    """
    # parse the command line, exit with UNKNOWN if it fails
    try:
        args = parse_args()
    except SystemExit:
        sys.exit(STATE_UNKNOWN)
    # fetch data
    if args.TEST is None:
        URL = args.URL
        if URL[0:4] != 'http':
            lib.base.cu('--url parameter has to start with "http://" or https://".')
        # fetch the URL
        result = lib.base.coe(lib.url.fetch(URL))
    else:
        # do not call the command, put in test data
        stdout, stderr, retc = lib.test.test(args.TEST)
        result = stdout
    result = result.strip().split('\n')
    # init some vars
    msg = ''
    state = STATE_OK
    perfdata = ''
    # analyze data
    #   Active connections: 2
    #   server accepts handled requests
    #    2 2 3
    #   Reading: 0 Writing: 1 Waiting: 1
    try:
        tmp, active_connections = result[0].strip().split(': ')
        total_connections_accepted, total_connections_handled, total_requests = result[2].strip().split(' ')
        requests_per_connection = round(float(total_requests) / float(total_connections_handled), 1)
        tmp, connections_reading, tmp, connections_writing, tmp, connections_waiting = result[3].strip().split(' ')
    except:
        lib.base.cu('Got no valuable response from {}.'.format(args.URL))
    # identify any alerts
    if total_connections_handled != total_connections_accepted:
        state = STATE_WARN
        msg += 'Some resource limits have been reached (for example, the worker_connections limit). '
    conn_state = lib.base.get_state(active_connections, args.WARN, args.CRIT, _operator='ge')
    state = lib.base.get_worst(conn_state, state)
    # build the message
    msg += '{} active concurrent {}{}; {} accepted {}, {} handled {}, {} {}; {} req per conn; currently {} receiving {}, {} sending {}, {} keep-alive {}'.format(
        active_connections, lib.txt.pluralize('conn', active_connections), lib.base.state2str(conn_state, prefix=' '),
        lib.human.number2human(total_connections_accepted), lib.txt.pluralize('conn', total_connections_accepted),
        lib.human.number2human(total_connections_handled), lib.txt.pluralize('conn', total_connections_handled),
        lib.human.number2human(total_requests), lib.txt.pluralize('req', total_requests),
        requests_per_connection,
        connections_reading, lib.txt.pluralize('req', connections_reading),
        connections_writing, lib.txt.pluralize('response', connections_writing),
        connections_waiting, lib.txt.pluralize('conn', connections_waiting),
        )
    perfdata += lib.base.get_perfdata('nginx_connections_accepted', total_connections_accepted, 'c', None, None, 0, None)
    perfdata += lib.base.get_perfdata('nginx_connections_active', active_connections, None, args.WARN, args.CRIT, 0, None)
    perfdata += lib.base.get_perfdata('nginx_connections_handled', total_connections_handled, 'c', None, None, 0, None)
    perfdata += lib.base.get_perfdata('nginx_connections_reading', connections_reading, None, None, None, 0, None)
    perfdata += lib.base.get_perfdata('nginx_connections_waiting', connections_waiting, None, None, None, 0, None)
    perfdata += lib.base.get_perfdata('nginx_connections_writing', connections_writing, None, None, None, 0, None)
    perfdata += lib.base.get_perfdata('nginx_http_requests_total', total_requests, 'c', None, None, 0, None)
    perfdata += lib.base.get_perfdata('nginx_requests_per_connection', requests_per_connection, None, None, None, 0, None)
    # over and out
    lib.base.oao(msg, state, perfdata, always_ok=args.ALWAYS_OK)