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TRIGGER WARNING: This content deals with an account of sexual assault and may be triggering to some people.
When you're being raped time does not stop. Time does not speed up and jump ahead like it does when you are with friends. Instead, time becomes your nemesis; it slows to such an excruciating pace that every second becomes an hour, every minute a year, and the rape becomes a lifetime.
On May 25, 2011, I was raped by an acquaintance in Crossett Dormitory on Amherst College campus.
Some nights I can still hear the sounds of his roommates on the other side of the door, unknowingly talking and joking as I was held down; it is far from a pleasant wakeup call.
I had always fancied myself a strong, no-nonsense woman, whose intense independence was cultivated by seventeen harrowing years of emotional abuse in my backwoods home. May 25th temporarily shattered that self-image and left me feeling like the broken victim that I had never wanted to be.
Everything I had believed myself to be was gone in 30 minutes.
I did not report the rape after it occurred. Almost immediately after the rape I flew off to California, got lost in the beauty of the redwoods, the phenomenal art, and meeting the most unique people I'd ever beheld.
I blocked the rape from my mind and tried to convince myself that it hadn't happened; that it couldn't have happened. But there was no denying the facts.
One week before I was supposed to fly back East, everything rushed over and consumed me. My memory had been restored and I wasn't sure how I would be able to hold myself together for that year, let alone for the upcoming three years.
When I returned to Amherst for my sophomore year, I designed a simple plan of attack for surviving: Business as usual combined with a new mantra I will NOT cry.
First semester passed relatively well, there were rocky times, but I kept it together. I masked fear with smiles. I mastered the art of avoiding prying questions. I drowned myself in work and extracurricular activities in order to hide my personal pain. I was unnervingly good at playing the role of well-adjusted sophomore.
It was inevitable though that this masquerade would become too overwhelming and that my façade would shatter.
In February twisted fate decided that I had to work with him on a fundraiser. E-mails. Stopping me in the gym and at the dining hall. Smirks. Winks. Pats on my back. It was all too much.
My masquerade was over.
I broke down and for the next several months, he won.
I spent most of my spring semester an emotional wreck. I saw his face everywhere I went. I heard his voice mocking me in my own head. I imagined new rapists hiding behind every shower curtain and potted plant. I bandaged the situation by throwing myself into more work and by resolutely refusing to acknowledge that I was anything but well adjusted.
Eventually I reached a dangerously low point, and, in my despondency, began going to the campus' sexual assault counselor. In short I was told: No you can't change dorms, there are too many students right now. Pressing charges would be useless, he's about to graduate, there's not much we can do. Are you SURE it was rape? It might have just been a bad hookup…You should forgive and forget.
How are you supposed to forget the worst night of your life?
I didn't know what to do any more. For four months I continued wandering around campus, distancing from my friends, and going to counseling center. I was continuously told that I had to forgive him, that I was crazy for being scared on campus, and that there was nothing that could be done. They told me: We can report your rape as a statistic, you know for records, but I don't recommend that you go through a disciplinary hearing. It would be you, a faculty advisor of your choice, him, and a faculty advisor of his choice in a room where you would be trying to prove that he raped you. You have no physical evidence, it wouldn't get you very far to do this.
Hours locked in a room with him and being called a liar about being raped? No thank you, I could barely handle seeing him from the opposite end of campus; I knew I couldn't handle that level of negativity.
When May rolled around, everything finally came to a head. My "Anniversary" was coming up and all of the terror that I had intermittently felt that year became one giant ball of horror that filled my life. He was still out there. He could get to me again. If I told anyone he would find out and do it again. No, no, no, no, no.
For my independent studies photography course I produced a series of 20 self-portraits representing myself before, during, and after the rape.
I showed them to my classmates. Their words stung like hornets: You look funny…I don't get it, why are you so upset?
I went to the counseling center, as they always tell you to do, and spoke about how genuinely sad I was at Amherst, how much I wanted to leave, and how scared I was on a daily basis. "I should just drink darkroom developer or something…"
Twenty minutes later campus police was escorting me into an ambulance. They were even less understanding: There's something seriously wrong with you; you're not healthy and normal right now. No, you can't say no. You HAVE to go, but don't worry, you won't have to be there too long. This is for your own good. Amherst cares about you and wants you to get better.
On May 5th I entered Cooley Dickinson Hospital's Emergency Room. Three hours after sitting curled up and terrified on a hospital bed I was admitted into the Psychiatric Ward for depression and suicidal thoughts. The doctor was skeptical to say the least: I really don't think that a school like Amherst would allow you to be raped. And why didn't you tell anybody? That just doesn't make any sense...Your anger and sadness right now seem unfounded and irrational, someone your age should not be this sad—it's not normal. We'll be admitting you in a few minutes, they'll take good care of you. They'll get you some drugs and they'll make you feel happy again…If you don't willingly enter we'll have a judge issue a court order legally forcing you to stay there. Trust us, this is for your own good.
So much for not having to stay.
The Psychiatric Ward was a lovely place: the top floor of the hospital, bare white walls, Spartan furnishings, and two stainless steel locked doors at either end of the corridor making sure that anyone who goes in, stays in. Doctors and Nurse Practitioners wondered around the bare hallways checking in on myself and my fellow patients—every fifteen minutes they recorded where we were, what we were doing, and whether we looked happy. In the morning we were given our drugs; if you didn't take them you would have to be there longer. It was in our best interest to take them, so they told us.
During the day we discussed our thoughts and feelings, our inhibitions, our strengths, but more often than not we did nothing.
When you're forced to sit and think about yourself for hours on end, you go through four stages of existence.
Stage 1: Hysteria—Characterized by denying that anything is wrong, "I'm perfectly fine" and "I don't belong here," are common phrases during this stage.
Stage 2: Numb and Ornery—You have finally realized that something is wrong with you, but you are overwhelmed and confused about how to go about fixing your problem. You therefore decide not to do anything.
Stage 3: Determination—You realize that the only way you're allowed to leave the Ward is if you "get better" and "solve your problems." Every fiber of your being thus goes into these two tasks.
Stage 4: Enlightenment—Everything falls into place. Your mind is no longer an oppressive hell and it begins to function again. The outside world no longer seems so daunting.
You are then permitted to leave.
My Enlightenment occurred when I least expected it. Four days into the Ward, I was sitting in on an introductory Substance Abuse and Mental Health Rehabilitation meeting since there was absolutely nothing better to do. To start us off, the meeting leader decided to have everyone go around and talk about why we were on the Ward. We went around the circle: hours in rehab, drug relapses, alcoholism, abusive boyfriends, being an abusive boyfriend, and escapism from the stresses of daily life. The stories weren't the superficial accounts that you read in a person's medical file; they were real life. Every problem, every ounce of frustration, every personal tick was laid bare that evening. And everyone was open, not proud, just blunt and sincere; the desire to improve their lives was palpable.
Over the past four days, I had yet to touch upon "what I was in for," my story was a mystery to everyone around me.
As my fellow patients went around the circle it all suddenly clicked. I realized why I never spoke about the rape, why I had refused to tell my school friends, why I had totally broken down, why I had steadily degenerated over the past few months. I was ashamed, and because of this shame I could not begin healing.
"Silence has the rusty taste of shame," a fellow survivor once wrote.
I had been far too silent, far too ashamed.
That night I told them everything.
For the first time I told my story and I was not ashamed.
Later that night, as I lay in bed—still in an adrenaline induced state of wakefulness—I heard my roommate whisper my name, and then, a question.
"Are you still awake?"
"Thought so…"
A long pause. She'd been in the meeting.
What was she thinking? What would she say?
"I just wanted to tell you, I…I know how it feels. My uncle raped me when I was 15. The police never arrested him. Rape "wasn't their top priority." It still hurts…You're incredibly brave to talk about it…I rarely do."
She was 42 years old.
I did not sleep. That night I realized that from then on I could not stay silent—if not for myself, then for my roommate.
I had reached the apex of Stage 4.
I decided that once I was released I would continue with my plans to study abroad that upcoming semester; I would be rejuvenated when I returned to campus in the winter, ready to take on the world and fight for survivor rights.
I would be strong again.
From the moment I woke, this plan hit one pitfall after another; a domino effect of roadblocks that continued for the next three months.
I sat at breakfast in bright spirits, attempting to carry on a conversation with a manic depressive woman who rarely talked. I was so genuinely happy that her lack of responses didn't even bother me—I just talked at her.
In the middle of my stimulating conversation my harried looking social worker suddenly strode into the dining room and headed purposefully over to me.
She looked grim and angry. "They're trying to prevent you from going back."
I was shocked.
She began rattling off the Administration's policy regarding students released from psychiatric care. In order for students to be allowed back they had to have parental supervision while on campus in order to make sure that the student did not relapse into substance abuse again (the most common reason for student admittance into the Ward). This meant that a parent would stay in a hotel near campus and would then follow their child around for two weeks until the "all clear" period was reached. "And since you don't have parents…"
She trailed off awkwardly and began to resolutely examine the upper left-hand corner of the dining room.
I must have been speechless for a good minute as a bizarre series of emotions plowed me over.
Shock to incredulity, back to shock, to sadness to anger, back to shock again, then back to sadness, and then an overwhelming amount of shame and embarrassment settled over me. I'm not worthy of even going back; that's how disgusting I am. I can't even step foot on campus…
Panic welled up inside of me.
Did this mean I was trapped on the Ward forever? God, no, I couldn't handle that. I wasn't crazy!
Claustrophobia and paranoia dropped on top of me and I wildly scanned the room. I met my roommate's eyes. She was looking at me with worry: What's wrong?
The room stopped spinning, the walls went back to their normal locations, I could breathe again, and now I was angry. I told her flat out: Let me get this straight. I was raped on their campus. I had an emotional breakdown because I didn't feel safe and felt harassed on their campus. I went to their counseling center, like they told me to, and I told them how I was feeling. They decided that I should be sent to the hospital. And now they won't allow me back on their campus? They allow rapists back on campus, but they won't allow the girl who was raped back? The girl who did nothing wrong.
She told me: Well, when you put it that way…
The maniacal grin on my social worker's face as she walked off was wonderful.
Needless to say, Amherst let me back on campus later that evening. Five days after being admitted, I was finally released from the Ward.
The car ride back to campus with my dean was, also needless to say, the most awkward car ride of my life. I looked at her: You know, I'm really glad that y'all let me back on campus, for a while there I was pretty worried and I was actually preparing an argument for why I should be allowed back…
Her response: No, no, no! That's not what happened, you must have just misunderstood the situation! We're so happy to have you back! Amherst is just such a wonderful place, we know you'll be happy to be back!
A big misunderstanding, I was skeptical.
In the following days I decided that my best policy when dealing with Amherst at the moment would be "let's let bygones be bygones." I quickly forgave the Administration and focused on just being happy to be out. On the inside though I was still dripping with anger, shame, and embarrassment.
Several days after my release I had to defend my chance to study abroad. My chance to leave campus for the first time in 8 months, my chance to relax and heal in a new environment, my biggest chance to revive my love of Amherst, and my chance to move on in life by studying what I truly love. The prospect had gotten me through the most frigid hours on the Ward and I was convinced that it would be the perfect way to continue my healing process.
I half-heartedly murmured, Your actions were understandable. I understand your policy when dealing with depression and students coming out of the Psychiatric Ward…during the meeting that included my dean and several of the campus counselors. Relief instantly flashed across all of their faces and the atmosphere rose in friendliness.
Then: The Ward was the best thing that could have happened to me. I have re-found my love of life and my desire to heal. I will never be 100% better, but I no longer feel like a victim. I'm a survivor, I'm strong, and I think that studying abroad will help me continue healing. When I return in the winter I'll have a greater understanding of myself and a greater appreciation of Amherst.
They responded with enthusiasm: Of course! Very coherent explanation. You seem much happier, which is wonderful! We agree that going abroad and getting off campus will do you good.
Study abroad here I come!
I felt genuinely happy for the first time in a year, and I could not wait to head out.
At Amherst though, things are never that easy.
A few weeks after my release from the Ward I had a routine check-in with my dean to make sure that I was still doing well. I was excited to be leaving soon, and I must have looked quite content, sitting in her office with a million watt smile and bright eyes. I began to rattle on about how nice the warm weather was, how beautiful commencement had been, how great life was, on and on. She seemed distracted: Nod, nod…Mhmmm…Well, excellent! I'm so glad to hear that you're excited about the upcoming summer here. I know how much you wanted to study abroad and how much work you must've put into it, but really, it's for the best. Africa is quite traumatizing, what with those horrible third-world conditions: disease…huts…lions! You'll be much better off here at Amherst where we can watch over you. It will give you some time to think about…you know…that…unfortunate incident…
My face was blank. "I'm supposed to go to Cape Town, South Africa…" Her response broke me down: Yes dear, I know. You were supposed to study in Africa. It's all for the best that you aren't though.
No one ever told me flat out that I would no longer be studying abroad. Not even the study abroad dean told me. I scheduled a meeting with her for two days after the meeting with my dean.
A few minutes after exchanging pleasantries she asked: What are your plans for the summer now that you're on campus?
For the month of June I was decrepit, nothing could perk me up. I returned to feeling the embarrassment and shame that had consumed me before going onto the Ward. If I hadn't told anyone about what happened I'd be abroad…If I had been stronger…If I wasn't such a failure…This is all my fault, I really am just a broken, polluted piece of shit…
Living was difficult. Each day I woke up and wandered around in a daze. At night I stared blank faced at a wall and curled up in my chair in a fetal position. I couldn't talk with people. If I talk with them they might become infected with my dirtiness.
I stopped eating. I stopped sleeping. I secretly hoped that one day on a run my heart would just stop and no one would have to see me again. I wasn't worth anything anyway.
I continued having to meet with my dean; she blamed my sadness on not being allowed to study abroad, but I knew that it wasn't that simple. I could live with not being allowed to go to South Africa at the moment, the country would be there for a while, but being forced to stay on campus in a dorm populated with men I did not know, that was the real psychological issue. Every time I told my dean that I didn't feel safe on campus, that I wanted to be allowed to leave , or at least be put in a different dorm, I received the same unhelpful responses that I had received in February. They told me: You were lucky to be given a room here this summer in the first place, housing is tight right now and you really shouldn't complain. All of your fear is ungrounded, Amherst is one of the safest places imaginable…If we let you leave campus we won't know what mental and emotional place you'll exist in when you return in September; you could become completely unstable! At Amherst we can monitor you, and, if need be, strongly suggest time off when the school year rolls around…
I felt like a prisoner, or, more accurately, like a harem girl. My jail was luxurious and openair, I was free to move about, the ruling power judged my worth on a weekly basis, and I was constantly reminded how lucky I was to be there.
One night, after a particularly rough meeting with my dean (I just don't understand why you've been so angry throughout all of this. You have no reason to be angry about anything.), I was curled up on my floor—I wasn't thinking, I didn't feel anything.
I went over to the mirror on the back of my door and stared. What had happened to the girl who had come off of the Ward so empowered and strong; the girl who decided to no longer be silent and feel shamed? Where had she gone?
I went over to my desk and picked up a brochure I had been given about a survivor center at UMass Amherst. I gave an exaggerated sigh. Might as well…I called the number and made an appointment for the next day.
I went back to the mirror and stared at myself again.
For the next 15 minutes I repeated: "Silence has the rusty taste of shame."
I walked over to my computer, typed up an email, hesitated for a second, and then pressed send.
I had just sent my entire sports team an email-rant about my rape and subsequent breakdown at the end of spring.
It was about time people began to realize that Amherst wasn't just majestic dorms and world-class professors.
It was about time I resumed the silent pact that I had made to my roommate on the Ward.
I will not be quiet.
The next few weeks were a blur of unending days spent resolutely working to feel better (A friend told me: You can't help other people if you feel like shit).
I was able to sleep again. I ate more. I went to free therapy sessions. I wrote and mindlessly colored in order to ground myself. I obsessively made lists of all the things imaginable. I joined a survivor group. I cried less and smiled a bit more.
I started healing.
It took a month of hard work until I was noticeably doing better. My friends, my therapist, my coworkers, and my fellow survivor group members all started commenting on how much healthier and happier I looked. I still felt uncomfortable and oppressed while surrounded by men on campus, but I was no longer afraid to leave my room after 7 p.m. I was determined to love Amherst again.
Life was tolerable.
Early July and I had another meeting with my dean: You look like you're doing better today. Well done, I'm so glad to see this kind of improvement! I think it's safe to assume that you can come back next semester, and in that regard I think that it's time that we talk about your time at Amherst over the next two years…I know you want to do African Studies through the Five Colleges, but I don't think I can support that decision. Africa is very traumatizing and I think that studying Africa is just a way for you to relive your real-life traumas; it's just not a good place to be studying.
Over the next thirty minutes several more restrictions were laid out: no Five College classes this upcoming year, no study abroad in the spring, definitely no senior year thesis, I would have to meet with a counselor twice a week, and friends off campus would have to be pushed to the wayside. She told me: Amherst is the only place that matters, and, really, you don't have a family, so where else would you go? Amherst is the only place that you can be.
At the end of our conversation I grunted out a vapid response and headed straight to my room. I sat on my bed, million-mile-gazed at the wall, and thought.
What was the point of staying at Amherst? I had been stuck on campus for eleven months straight; each day had been more challenging and emotionally draining than the previous one. I had been feeling better recently, but each time I met with my dean I felt more emotionally distraught than I had beforehand. Her comments reminded me that in the Administration's eyes I was the most base individual: a poor and parentless humanities major who was the school's token-Deep-Southerner. I was sullied, blameworthy, and possibly insane.
I made a Pros and Cons of Amherst List.
The Pro List had seven items.
The Con List had twenty-three items.
On July 14th I made one of the hardest decisions of my life.
I was going to withdraw from Amherst.
That next week I threw myself into finding a way out. Plans were made, plans were broken, Plan B was made, and finally Plan B was successful!
I did not tell the Administration for fear that they would somehow sabotage me. It was probably paranoid, but after being prevented from leaving campus multiple times I was not going to take any chances. The conversation went similarly to this:
"I'm withdrawing from Amherst."
That was my greeting to my dean when I met with her in late July.
The look of complete shock on her face was priceless. When she recovered: So you're taking a semester off? That's perfectly ok, many survivors do, I think it's best that you do what you…
No, I'm withdrawing, permanently. I ain't planning on ever coming back. I'm going to transfer to another school after taking a semester off to travel around.
You can't…You…Nobody withdraws. Where are you going to go? You don't have parents. What are you going to do?
I'm working on a Dude Ranch in Wyoming.
…I didn't think you'd be able to figure out a plan…Well, we technically won't withdraw you from the school until three years have passed. After three years we'll double-check to make sure that you really want to withdraw and then we'll remove you from our current-students system.
No, I just want you to withdraw me. I don't want to come back, I don't want to be affiliated with your school anymore. I'm sick of this place.
I think you need to meet with our sexual assault counselor again, you're way too angry right now and not thinking clearly. I have a feeling you'll change your mind and come back. Amherst is one of the best schools out there, it will be a transfer down unless you go to an Ivy…
You know, I have I feeling that I won't want to come back, but that's just a hunch.
As my dean suggested, I met with our sexual assault counselor a few days later. The meeting was uncharacterizeable by one word, but bizarre might be the closest description: This is a bad idea, you're not thinking straight.
I didn't understand this. I'd been thinking about this for quite a while; I was unhappy at Amherst and I didn't understand why I should stay at a place where I was absolutely miserable. There are other places in the world.
The next two hours was a hodgepodge of topics: Your lack of parental support makes you emotionally volatile and prevents you from following through with decisions that you make.
Apparently I had decided not to study abroad. Then there was bizarre 'concern:'You don't look very healthy. Have you been eating? I think you might have an eating disorder. You know there's a great clinic in Northhampton where we can send you for in-patient eating disorder treatment.
I don't have an eating disorder; I used to have one, I know what they're like. I don't eat a lot because I can't afford to buy food.
Then the ranch came up: Do you realize how difficult working on a Dude Ranch will be? The people in Wyoming are different from the people at Amherst, they won't be well-educated, and they won't understand you. You're going to a backwards place. Do you realize how bad it will be?
Yes, because the rest of the US is filled with ignorant savages who haven't been saved by the light of Amherst. How would I ever survive?
To the counselor's great surprise, these stellar arguments did not convince me to stay at Amherst. I became even more resolute about my decision to leave, and decided to talk with the Victim Rights Law Center, a pro-bono law firm based in Boston that my survivor group had recommended to me several weeks earlier. My preliminary intake with the VRLC was quite eye-opening: Oh Amherst? Yeah, unfortunately I know Amherst all too well. I've been down there many times to deal with the administration and their constant mistreatment of survivors. Our law firm keeps trying to force them to change but they just don't seem to understand, they keep doing the same old thing.
Amherst has almost 1800 students; last year alone there were a minimum of 10 sexual assaults on campus. In the past 15 years there have been multiple serial rapists, men who raped more than five girls, according to the sexual assault counselor. Rapists are given less punishment than students caught stealing. Survivors are often forced to take time off, while rapists are allowed to stay on campus. If a rapist is about to graduate, their punishment is often that they receive their diploma two years late.
I eventually reported my rapist.
He graduated with honors.
I will not graduate from Amherst.
The stories and statistics are miles long in regards to sexual assault on campus. My story is far from unique, and, compared to some of the stories I have heard, is tame.
The more that I learn about Amherst's policy toward sexual assault and survivors in general, the more relief I feel in deciding to transfer. How could I stay at a school who had made my healing process not just difficult, but impossible? How could I stand knowing that the Administration promotes silence? How could I spend the next two years made to feel dirty and at fault?
I could not.
At one point I hated Amherst with an indescribable amount of fury, but I do not hate the school anymore. Amherst took a lot from me, but they gave me some of the greatest gifts imaginable: self-confidence, my closest friends, intellectual curiosity, and endless personal strength. For these things I am forever grateful. For everything else, I stand back and behold the college with a feeling of melancholia.
The fact that such a prestigious institution could have such a noxious interior fills me with intense remorse mixed with sour distaste. I am sickened by the Administration's attempts to cover up survivors' stories, cook their books to discount rapes, pretend that withdrawals never occur, quell attempts at change, and sweep sexual assaults under a rug. When politicians cover up affairs or scandals the masses often rise up in angry protestations and call for a more transparent government. What is the difference between a government and the Amherst College campus? Why can't we know what is really happening on campus? Why should we be quiet about sexual assault?
"Silence has the rusty taste of shame."
There is no reason shame should be a school's policy.
UPDATE: President Carolyn "Biddy" Martin has released a statement concerning this article and the follow-up steps being taken by the administration regarding sexual assault: https://www.amherst.edu/campuslife/letters_president/node/436469
I'm a student at Bowdoin College, and I have been touched by your strength and desire to heal. You have so much good to share, and there's so much you can change by doing so. Keep it up, and stay free!
Thank you for being so open and brave. Your words are ripping through the internet quickly and you ARE making a difference by posting this. Good luck with your time off!
Thank you for speaking up, and for having the courage to write this article. I suspect that the administration's reaction is typical to many colleges, and it sickens and saddens me that there is still a culture of blaming and marginalizing the victim after all the progress women have made.
You are a hero for speaking up.
You are the strongest girl I know. A friend of mine who goes to Amherst showed me this story and I applaud your bravery and strength. You can definitely keep that strong, no-nonsense woman, with an intense independence, view of yourself because you truly are just that, and more! The way you handled your situation proves it. I'm only sorry it had to be so rough for you and that you couldn't heal properly, then again, not most victims do. Just remember, you are not alone. For a young girl to have to go through this with no parental support, no cooperative administration, and no helpful counselors or friends, you only further empowered your independence and strength. I am so so deeply sorry you had to go through this on your own and I only wish I or someone could have been there to help you! And now I hear you're livin your life in Europe?? Go head with ya bad self girl! You're livin the dream and you keep on doing that. I am so proud of you.
Thank you so much for sharing your story. As a survivor, I am sending you so much love and gratitude.
Your story reminds all of us to seriously consider the question, "Do you feel safe?" And to deeply respect that each answer to that question is valid, meaningful, real, and MATTERS.
Hope is the thing with feathers that perches in the soul - and sings the tunes without the words - and never stops at all.
-Emily Dickinson
I have no words to describe how incredibly brave this is. As both a survivor of sexual assault and an ally of other survivors on my college campus, I would like to thank you for sharing your story. We send our love and support to you from Los Angeles.
As I read through Angie Epifano's account, I realized that what I was hearing was the flip side of what we in the Student Affairs profession do as we advise and guide students. We advise students to facilitate and further their academic and social development, but when working with "problematic cases" we always advise them in the best interest of our respective institutions. It isn't Amherst alone; it's many colleges across the country. I know, as an adviser at a Midwestern college, that much of what we do in these instances is based on fear because we rely on our legal counsel's office and we play it safe. Our goal changes from what is in the best interest of the student to what is in the best interest of other students around him/her and ultimately the institution's liability. Thus, we neglect to differentiate between someone who has psychological issues because of unresolved abuse but is working to change the circumstances of his/her life and someone who is very seriously mentally ill and doesn't seem to know what to do about it. I am not one bit surprised that she was told she could not go on Study Abroad after having once been on suicide watch. I remember when I was a study abroad adviser once, going through every list of students who had signed up for study abroad with the dean of students and the counseling services staff and determining who was "safe" to go, who needed an eye kept on him or her, and who flat-out could not go. The dean is, by virtue of his/her administrative position, in close contact with the legal counsel's office and is often unfortunately dictated to by them. I remember my dean once telling me that she struggled with balancing the educational interests of the institution with its liabilities, and that she knew that if the legal counsel's office had their way, the school wouldn't even offer a study abroad program! So for those of you commenters who are doubting the veracity of Angie's claims, don't. She has told it from her perspective. What people in my profession need to reminded of is that these are people we're working with... dynamic people who because of their age, their drive, their goals, etc. can turn their lives around and move forward constructively. All we need to do is stop getting in the way. A study abroad stint would have done Angie wonders. They should have taken a chance on her but it unfortunately doesn't surprise me that they didn't. Thank you, Angie, for so articulately writing about your experience. It should serve as a wake-up call to people in my profession to humanize their students and to see shades of grey. I hope you get to travel the world. Personally, I know that it is one of THE best ways to get one's life in order.
Dear Angie,
You are an incredible person and I am in awe of your bravery. I want you to know that we support you, and your courage is an inspiration to us all. Coming from a male-dominated military background, I have witnessed far too many similar scenarios, but I never thought this could happen at Amherst. The actions of the administration are quite shocking. I can only hope that their agenda will not be one of 'damage control' for the Amherst image, but one that genuinely attempts to address the issue to ensure this does not ever happen again. Thank you for sharing your story.
Support and solidarity sister. Reach out, screw Amherst if they don't want to help you. Stuff like this makes me *GLAD* Amherst rejected me and I got into Hampshire. I ended up at the better school anyway, :). You can move forward. You have support. You. Can. Make. It.
Thank You Angie for such bravery. You are not alone. To "Read This..": you've got to be kidding me...that's a small sample size of schools in western New England. You cannot extrapolate from that (with any intellectual honesty) that Amherst College is a hotbed of sexual violence. Let's not assume that one rape means many, no matter how despicable the reaction from the administration. I recently attended a single-sex College in the Valley and found Amherst men to be far more respectful than UMass men or men from colleges back home fwiw.
You're very brave. Thank you.
This is bullshit. It is absurd that this happens anywhere. I'm from UMass, where these problems are severe. Your story is deeply resonant, combining the personal and the political. I applaud your courage and candor. WE are with you.
This is being widely read at Northwestern. We support you and your bravery.
I went to Middlebury for two years before realizing I had to leave; I turned down two Ivies and transferred to a UC (I'm originally from California). I never experienced any sexual assault, but part of the reason I felt Middlebury was so toxic to me had to do with the insidious culture of often subtle misogyny. I basically got pretty depressed and felt like I didn't fit in and I was so blatantly not the "right kind" of woman or person for the school, like I didn't belong and would never belong.
I took some time off and travelled and volunteered extensively abroad before transferring and it was the best thing I've ever done for myself. Don't listen to anyone who says a dude ranch in wyoming is somehow a less important experience than college, or to anyone who says you'll be "transferring down." I transferred down and, while I do sometimes wonder if I should have gone to an Ivy, I know it was the right choice for me to remove myself from the place where I'd been so negatively affected.
There is something deeply off about the new england liberal arts colleges, where students are told how great the community is and smothered in a facade of acceptance all while simultaneously being asked to conform to a noxious ideal. Be yourself, don't be afraid, and please know how deeply brave it is for you to write this and post it and report it. You will never get back these years and the person you were before, but maybe by speaking out you can help someone else feel less alone and help cause real change.
You are a stunning person. Thank you.
I agree. There is something off about these colleges. What should we do?
Hi Angie, I just wanted to thank you for sharing your story. I'm a survivor of rape myself, and I know how suffocating the shame and silence can truly be. I can't even express to you how moving it is to see someone so selflessly putting their pain out into the open for the sake of others. It takes a strength I've never had.
I also just wanted to let you know this story is circulating and having an impact nationwide, I'm a USC student and I found this through a friend at UCLA who had it sent to them by a friend at Stanford. I hope that Amherst feels enough pressure to think seriously about change.
Thank you for taking a stand for survivors everywhere, and I hope that you find peace and healing in the future.
A very similar experience happened to me at a boarding school. I am so proud of you for stepping forward about this. Thank you!
... To all those who did not have the strength, as you did, to write this. As a freshman here, it disgusts me that they virtually ignore all victims pleas for help, and I vow to spread awareness. Thank you for this.
Angie, you are a survivor. Thank you for sharing this. Amherst needs to do something about this IMMEDIATELY. You should reveal his name.
Love and support from Mount Holyoke.
Angie, you are a survivor. Thank you for sharing this. Amherst needs to do something about this IMMEDIATELY. You should reveal his name.
Love and support from Mount Holyoke.
You have so much strength to be so open about an event like this. I, too, was raped (not at NU) and never said anything for fear of people thinking I was weak. When I did decide to tell someone, I was told I was a lying slut. That I was too dominant and strong of a person for something like that to happen to "someone like me". It's baffling how a victim can be the one reprimanded in the event of such a heinous crime. Thank you so much for your astounding courage and for sharing this.
The same thing happened to me my first year at the University of Chicago. I've never heard anyone else's story in such detail before. To be honest, I had to stop reading, because I don't want to think about it, but I've felt all the same feelings, the denial, anger, and pain. Its amazing that you actually reported your rapist. That takes a lot of strength. I wish you the best of luck in all your future endeavors.
Angie, you are such a strong woman. Thank you for sharing this. Amherst needs to do something about this IMMEDIATELY. You should reveal his name.
Love and support from Mount Holyoke.
You are loved for your bravery. Good luck and I wish you the best of success.
Angie, you are so brave and strong. Thank you for sharing your story. Love from William and Mary.
Angie, you have thousands standing behind you. I hope you can feel the support and gratitude surrounding you and holding you close. I graduated from Smith two years ago, and I also spent some time on the lonely top floor of Cooley-Dickinson's locked psychiatric ward. Though what brought me there was a far different story from yours, I identified closely with the pushback and ridiculous policies that were held upon your release - I was also threatened with dismissal and then later told that I must have "misunderstood the situation." I want to echo former commenters' words that you have done your Ward roommate proud with this piece you have written.
I had a very similar story happen to me. Thank you for speaking up. As one survivor to another, my empathy is endless and my love knows no bounds.
I am from New Zealand and this has reached us too. I am horrified that this has taken place and Angie is incredibly brave and strong to stand up and make her story known. New Zealand has noticed and we support you Angie. Amherst better apologise and change its policies quick or it will be blacklisted around the world.
Thank you for sharing your story. You are strong. You are brave. You are inspiring. You are loved.
Angie, what a horrible and frightening story. My college has also been recently "exposed" for sweeping sexual assaults and rape under the rug. I really just want to apologize on behalf of HUMANITY for what happened to you. You are so, so brave for speaking out. I am so sorry you did not get justice. I am shocked that colleges are so incredibly harmful when it comes to sexual assault--not just ignorant, but making it SO much worse. It's disgusting. I am crying right now because I simply can't imagine what you went through. Please know that you are a wonderful person and you have helped not only yourself by speaking out but many other victims.
This has reached us in Australia. We support you Angie. Amherst, you better be panicking because you fucked up royally.
You're making waves with a beautifully written account of tragedy. No one should EVER have to go what you went through. You are a brave and astounding woman for sharing your story! Trust me when I tell you - you have already made a huge difference in many people's lives. I was deeply moved by your story (and am so glad I decided against attending Amherst!)
You are so brave for sharing this. As someone who has also experienced sexual assault, I am so appreciative for the people who are brave enough to speak out. I still don't speak of what happened to me very often for fear of not being believed. I'm in Australia and very far away from you and your world, but your story touched and inspired me. Thank you.
Thank you so much for sharing your story. I've passed it along to Jezebel, in the hopes that it will pick it up and garner even more national attention. Words can't really do how this piece has made me feel justice, but as someone who has experienced the devastating effect of sexual violence on those who I have loved multiple times, your piece was truly powerful. Thank you thank you for speaking out, and I really hope that the University changes for the better because of your words.
You have an ally at Stanford.
From a student at a school whose school who has been struggling to fix the catastrophe you experienced when trying to report your ordeal and seek counseling, thank you. This is a problem not isolated to Amherst, but a problem that many colleges (and especially the "prestigious" ones) have as well. It's time for administrations to put their students above their public images--because when it comes down to it, it is in their best interest to do so.
To college administrations: it takes far more courage, and it is far more admirable, to admit that your college has problems, that sexual assaults do occur, and that steps need to be taken to ensure that victims can come forward without being discouraged from legal action, or pushed into isolation, or being told that they have their own story wrong, or, most importantly, having to feel shame for telling their story.
To students: the majority of you will not do this, but for those of you who do, please stop discounting the gravity of sexual assault and rape. It happens, and it is not one of those things that becomes less serious if you joke about it, or that you can even pretend to understand. I know that I have never been a victim of such acts and I know very well that I am lucky. Don't wait until it happens to one of your friends. Foster a safe environment for people to come forward through your daily behavior. It's the little things--jokes about rape, saying that some outfit makes a girl asking to get raped, and subtler things--that ultimately make a victim feel ashamed about what may have happened to him or her. It's up to us to change things. We can't depend on the administration to change.
To victims: Don't be ashamed. Never, ever be ashamed. Speak up like the incredibly brave girl who wrote this, and set an example for others. I know it may be hard, but I know I will never understand how hard it truly was. But what I do know is that keeping it secret, keeping it hidden, will only destroy you more.
And to those of you saying she's exaggerating, that she's seeking attention, that she needs to hear the other side? Fuck you. This is her side. This is how it affected her. How dare you tell her that she shouldn't, that she isn't, feeling this way. How dare you shame her for being braver than most of us could ever imagine being, for standing up for herself, for speaking out.
Angie, thank you so much for sharing your story. I can't imagine what it was like to go through that, but I hope writing this article brought you some peace and that it also results in Amherst making changes to the way they handle sexual assault. Your story has brought you many new supporters. Best of luck to you.
Thank you for writing this.
Your story has made it over to Pomona College as well. We only have love and support for you, Angie. Best of luck.
Thank you so much for standing up and telling your story! Lead an amazing life … that's the best form of revenge. Don't ever let them stop you! All the best!
You are incredible--thank you for sharing your story. Sending you lots of love from Berkeley, CA.
It's almost unbelievable how similar our stories are. Except I chose to report the assault within a few days, then press charges through the school, then study abroad. (Also, I do not go to Amherst...) But this semester is ending..... and I'll be coming back home. I wish I could ask you how you dealt with it- the anxiety mostly. A criminal trial would have been forcing me to re-live hell. My rapist was suspended for two years. He'll be back to the same school soon enough, with the same friends. I can't.... Thank you for sharing, it's good to know that someone else out there understands how it's felt. (Between the interrogations of detectives, doctors, honor court, family, friends..... it's easy to forget that you aren't the only person in the world going through something like this) Please continue to share your story. You never know who might need to hear it. And to the people who have the nerve to comment on here accusing Angie of lying, etc- your ignorance and skepticism are a huge part of the pain and humiliation that a victim of rape has to suffer through. It's very unfortunate that you would use your ignorance to attack a victim as you are doing here.
Just reiterating what others have said: thank you, so much, for speaking up, and know that you have an ally in this columbia undergrad.
Thank you so much for sharing your story. Know that you are being heard! Obviously institutional change is necessary at Amherst and no doubt at schools across the country, but I hope this piece will also inspire all of us in the Five Colleges and beyond to reflect on how we can contribute to a community in which there is no place for the painful injustice you encountered here.
Thank you so much for sharing your story. Know that you are being heard! Obviously institutional change is necessary at Amherst and no doubt at schools across the country, but I hope this piece will also inspire all of us in the Five Colleges and beyond to reflect on how we can contribute to a community in which there is no place for the painful injustice you encountered here.
Scripps College's student government just linked your story on their facebook page. You are being heard all the way in California. Thank you for being brave enough to share your story and I hope your personal recovery goes well. Your words will illicit change and while that cannot make up for what has happened to you, hopefully it can give you some closure. Good luck


text:
The ghostly orbits
Francesca Gavin
Francesca Gavin is a prolific arts writer and curator. Based between Berlin and London as Visual Arts Editor of Dazed & Confused and Art Editor of Twin, Gavin is also the curator of the Soho House art collection. Internationally recognised, she possesses a global outlook, having put together permanent displays of art previously in Berlin, Miami, New York, New York and London. She has also written five books including "The Book of Hearts", "100 New Artists" and "Hell Bound: New Gothic Art".
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subset: commoncrawl


text:
Meeting Minutes
August 10, 2007
These minutes have not been approved yet, because a quorum was not present at the November 2007 board meeting.
Board Members Present: Mary Jo Green, Ann Neviaser, Debra McKinney, Andrew Blair, Milton McPike, Alan Stager, Elizabeth Tucker, and Katie Klaus for Verna Fowler.
HEAB Staff Present: Connie Hutchison, Sherrie Nelson, John Whitt, Sandy Thomas, Cassie Weisensel
Others Present: Sharon Wilhelm, UW System Administration; Dan Goyette, Alverno; Tom Heffron, WTCS; Kristofer Frederick, UW System Administration; Rolf Wegenke, WAICU; Paul Nelson, WAICU; Jacky Thomson, Alverno; Jessica Clark Justman, DPI; Emily Pope, LFB; Margaret Zitzer, Marquette.
Chair Mary Jo Green called the meeting to order at 9:03 a.m.
Moved by Deb McKinney, seconded by Milton McPike to approve the minutes of the March 2, 2007 Board Meeting.
State Budget Update: The budget is currently in conference committee. The Assembly and the Senate passed two different budgets but Connie is anticipating increases in WHEG-UW, WHEG-Technical Colleges and the Tuition Grant programs. The budget is expected to be decided sometime this fall.
Proposed Legislation: AB 151 is a partially forgivable loan for students of veterinary medicine for food producing animals. SB 252 is a companion bill to AB 151, which is 80% forgivable. AB 440 is a partially forgivable loan for pharmacy students who work in a shortage area. Connie explained to the board that forgivable loans are very expensive to run when the loans go into repayment. All of these bills are being considered as part of the Assembly Budget Bill.
Talent Incentive Program Update: A complaint was received from the US Department of Education from a student who felt discriminated against because race is one criterion that can be used to determine TIP eligibility. Race is not a required criterion, just one of many criteria used in determining eligibility for TIP. HEAB has been working with the Department of Justice on this. HEAB is currently waiting for a response from the US Department of Education.
Special Presentation: A special presentation was made for the outgoing Board Vice-Chairperson, Ann Neviaser, who is retiring from the Board this year. Mary Jo thanked Ann for her dedicated service over the past five years. She has been a great asset to both the Board and the HEAB staff. On behalf of all, she was presented with an inscribed plaque noting her years of service to the Board. Ann took a moment to thank the members of the Board and other attendees to Board meetings for their dedication.
BOARD REPORT #08-01 2007-2008 Minnesota-Wisconsin Reciprocity
The current agreement will not change for the 2007-2008 school year but there are some substantial changes for the fall of 2008. Beginning in 2008, the payment that Wisconsin currently makes to Minnesota for the difference in tuition will now be sent to the University of Minnesota System and Minnesota State Colleges and Universities System instead of the State of Minnesota. There will also be a new program called the Wisconsin Reciprocity Supplement Program where the Wisconsin payment will be redirected to the Minnesota campuses to cover the tuition gap between the higher-of-the-two and comparable state tuition rates.
Moved by Ann Neviaser, seconded by Milton McPike, to fully endorse the changes in the Minnesota-Wisconsin reciprocity agreement. The motion passed unanimously.
BOARD REPORT #08-02 Status of 2006-07 and 2007-08 Applicants and
In 2006-07 WHEG-UW has committed 132.00% ($57,213,737) of its appropriation with 29,170 awards. This is 96 more awards and 1.49% less committed than at this time last year. The final commitment for 2005-06 was 132.00%. WHEG-WTC has committed 170.10% ($28,382,629) of its appropriation with 33,950 awards. This is 40 more awards and .22% more committed than at this time last year. The final commitment for 2005-06 was 170.10%. WTG has committed 104.15% ($23,698,459) of its appropriation with 9,314 awards. This is 941 fewer awards and 3.78% less committed than at this time last year. The final commitment for 2005-06 was 107.93%. WHEG-TRIBAL has committed 207.90% ($839,937) of its appropriation with 550 awards. This is 248 more awards and 108.47% more committed than at this time last year. The final commitment for 2005-2006 was 99.43%. The number of applicants through June 12, 2007, for the 2006-07 academic year is 254,376.
In the current academic year WHEG-UW has committed 126.72% ($49,774,907) of its appropriation with 23,474 awards. This is 1,155 fewer awards and 15.24% more committed than at this time last year. In 2006-07 the program had committed 111.48% of its appropriation at this time. Note: The appropriation recommended by the Joint Finance Committee, plus $4,064,684 of the $8,000,000 the Governor restored to WHEG-UW, was used to calculate the 2006-07 committed percentage. WHEG-WTC has committed 129.54% ($21,648,456) of its appropriation with 25,224 awards. This is 260 fewer awards and .17% more committed than at this time last year. In 2006-07 the program had committed 129.37% of its appropriation at this time. WTG has committed 113.06% ($28,285,878) of its appropriation with 10,140 awards. This is 2,120 more awards and 17.40% more committed than at this time last year. In 2006-07 the program had committed 96.49% of its appropriation at this time. WHEG-TRIBAL has committed 135.06% ($545,644) of its appropriation with 335 awards. This is 35 more awards and 35.30% more committed than at this time last year. In 2006-07 the program had committed 94.13% of its appropriation at this time. The number of applicants through July 11, 2007 for the 2007-08 academic year is 178,116. Last year at this time there were 172,167 applicants.
BOARD REPORT #08-03 2006-2007 Annual Academic Excellence Scholarship
Program Report
Every year HEAB is required to report on the status of the Academic Excellence Scholarship to the Joint Finance Committee by August 1st. It was pointed out that not much changes from year to year. Eighty-eight percent of the freshmen awarded the Academic Excellence Scholarship in 2006 accepted the scholarship and used it to attend a Wisconsin post secondary institution. In 2006-07, 777 freshmen enrolled in a Wisconsin post secondary institution. Total AES funds going to freshmen students were $853,127 with an average award of $1,098.
Break at 10:10am for 10 minutes.
Meeting called back to order at 10:24am
Elections were held for the three Board officer positions, Chair, Vice-Chair, and Secretary.
Mary Jo Green opened the floor for nominations for Chair. Debra McKinney nominated Mary Jo Green for the position of Chair, seconded by Milton McPike. The motion passed unanimously.
Debbie McKinney nominated Liz Tucker for the position for Vice-Chair, seconded by Milton McPike. The motion passed unanimously.
Ann Neviaser nominated Debbie McKinney for the position of Secretary, seconded by Milton McPike. The motion passed unanimously.
The dates that were chosen are as follows: November 2, 2007; February 1, 2008; April 4, 2008; and August 1, 2008.
Moved by Liz Tucker, seconded by Milton McPike, to adjourn the meeting. Motion carried and Chair Mary Jo Green adjourned the meeting at 10:50am.
Respectfully submitted by
Debra McKinney, Secretary
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text:
English translation of 'zuknallen'
Word Frequency
Verb Table transitive verb separable or intransitive verb
(vi, aux sein) (informal) to slam
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text:
Archer keeps Angels off balance as Rays even series
ANAHEIM -- The Rays rebounded nicely from Thursday night's devastating loss to take a 3-0 decision over the Angels on Friday night at Angel Stadium.
The Rays are 3-2 on their seven-game road trip and moved to 19-24 on the season.View Full Game Coverage
ANAHEIM -- The Rays rebounded nicely from Thursday night's devastating loss to take a 3-0 decision over the Angels on Friday night at Angel Stadium.
The Rays are 3-2 on their seven-game road trip and moved to 19-24 on the season.View Full Game Coverage
Thursday night, the Rays blew a three-run lead in the ninth. Friday night, they got back to work, handing the ball to Chris Archer to regain their momentum before handing it over to Grant Balfour in the end.
Archer and Jered Weaver posted zeros on the scoreboard through four innings before Yunel Escobar hit a solo homer off Weaver with two outs in the fifth to put the Rays in the lead.
Archer, who had been cruising, then faced his first real test when he walked John McDonald with two outs in the Angels' fifth. McDonald stole second before Erik Aybar and Mike Trout walked to load the bases.
Archer had thrown 88 pitches at that point with Albert Pujols stepping to the plate. Archer fell behind, 1-0, before he got the Angels slugger to bite on an 87-mph slider that he chopped down the third-base line. Evan Longoria fielded the ball and stepped on third to end the threat.
"I was trying to get him out," Archer said. "Whatever it took. We have super advance-scouting reports. My stuff was good. ... I threw him a slider down in the strike zone and he rolled over on it.
"It's one of those things, this game is a game of inches. That's a cliche, but that ball hit the chalk and Longo got it as it hit the chalk and he was able to step on the bag at third. An inch left and it's a foul ball and we're talking about a totally different situation."
Archer got the first two outs of the sixth before Efren Navarro singled to center on his 104th pitch. Rays manager Joe Maddon lifted the right-hander and brought on Juan Carlos Oviedo, who retired Hank Conger on a groundout to end the inning.
Archer allowed no runs on two hits and five walks while striking out five in 5 2/3 innings en route to his third win.
"Archer was good, kept a nice tempo," Maddon said. "The stuff you saw out of him was typical for him. You saw the good velocity with the fastball. I thought the slider had better location. He ran into that one little moment again where he walked several guys in a row, but he got through it against a pretty good hitter, which was nice to see that."
James Loney's seventh-inning single off the right-field wall scored Longoria from second to put the Rays up 2-0. Longoria then singled home Desmond Jennings in the eighth to give the Rays a three-run cushion.
"It's probably the best I've felt all year, as far as being able to command the fastball with strength and mixing in offspeed [pitches]," said Weaver, who took his third loss. "Really, the only pitch I want back isn't even the homer, I think it was the 2-2 to Loney. I tried to get it in there and it just came back over the plate and he put good wood on it. I thought I threw the ball well, and Archer had some pretty electric stuff out there."
Oviedo, Jake McGee and Joel Peralta accounted for 2 1/3 scoreless innings of relief leading up to Balfour coming in to get the final three outs in the ninth.
Like Thursday night, when Balfour got roughed up while trying to protect a three-run lead in the Rays' loss, Balfour entered the game with a three-run lead. This time, there were no dramatics as Balfour retired the Angels in order to earn his eighth save.
Balfour allowed that prior to the game he straightened out some mechanical issues that helped his control and he also adjusted his mindset.
"It's like getting a new toy," Balfour said. "I was excited to get out there and harness it and do what I did.
"I knew what I did and the way I pitched some games, it's not me, and it's not who they signed to have here closing out games. And I'm just glad a couple of things there I figured out. Now I gotta continue to go out there and keep doing it. And be consistent."
Bill Chastain is a reporter for MLB.com.


text:
December 19, 2010
The Little Giant basketball team broke open an early close game against Allegheny, stretching a 20-point halftime lead to an 89-56 victory in North Coast Athletic Conference play at home Sunday afternoon.
Wabash, ranked ninth in the latest D3hoops.com poll, entered the contest as the top-ranked scoring defense in the country. The Little Giants lived up to their ranking, holding Allegheny 15 points below its scoring average for the season.
View photos from the Wabash victory here, here, and here.
The Gators held an early five-point lead before Wabash jumped into its familiar 1-3-1 zone defense. The Little Giants held Allegheny to three points over the next eight minutes while outscoring the Gators 18-3. A 16-4 run by the Little Giants to close out the final six minutes of the first half followed by an 18-8 run to start the second put the game out of reach.
Wes Smith (right) scored 20 points to pace Wabash. Freshman Pete Nicksic (below left) recorded his first career double-double with 13 points and 11 rebounds, including seven offensive boards. The Little Giants' balance proved to be too much for Allegheny. Nick Curosh added nine points, while Aaron Zinnerman, Brian Shelbourne, and Derek Bailey each finished with eight. Ben Burkett tossed in seven points. Shelbourne also dished out seven assists in the victory.
Wabash owned the glass, outrebounding the Gators 50-31. The Little Giants scored 20 second-chance points on 16 offensive boards compared to five on nine offensive rebounds for Allegheny.
The Gators had five players averaging double figures in scoring coming into the contest. Junior James Ness finished with 11 points overall, but was held scoreless in the second half after getting in early foul trouble. Clark Tritto came off the bench late in the game to add eight points.
The Little Giant return to action on Wednesday, December 29 with a 7:30 p.m. contest at Franklin College.


text:
This is a group to discuss the joy of being childless! I am amazed at the number of atheists I have met over the past few years that are childless by choice, here is a place to discuss stories and experiences!
Members: 371
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I am so happy. Now whatever happens in the world, if birth control is unavailable due to economic collapse or republican rule, I will never be forced to have a kid. It's the only way to guarantee it.
And I sure am glad to never take depo-provera again. The side effects were horrible.
Welcome to the "fixed" club !
There's a bunch of us 'fixed" who discuss this theme on the VHMT Facebook page too, mostly atheists there as well, though there are a couple of mildly religious folks, very mildly. The VHEMT are an interesting bunch.
So you've got a couple of days of calm healing ahead of you. Take care :)
Just got fixed today. Finally!
There have been conversations here about depressed parents not being good parents. Personally, I stand by it. A truly depressed person is dysfunctional in society, and that is certainly not what is needed to raise a functional child. Depressed persons are low on energy, have issues with emotional stability, have difficulty establishing relationships, have difficulty with tasks, etc. Being myself one of these, and having been in treatment groups with many other such people... it's definitely best we don't have children. Was I a depressed child? is that why I've ALWAYS known I did not want children... maybe, no one can tell for sure. But I value my depression and what it makes me, my sad feelings I am convinced are related to the fact that we Homo sapiens have really fucked up planet Earth and most of humanity is more excited by power, money, materialism and living forever than enjoying nature as it is, and being ok with death as a natural part of the cycle of life, and living a balanced life, instead of a life of constant economic growth. Yes I am put off by humanity, especially the 95% of positivist faithers, including Humanists, out there who insist that everything a human does is "beautiful", BS.
Oh good. I thought I had missed something.
Where was the judgment of people with depression? I love it when people specifically look for ways to be outraged and offended.
The complete abscence of empathy combined with judgemental stereotyping of those of us with depression as "unfit" parents is very sickening. I would suggest that someone that displays the traits of a compassionless arsehole, as some have displayed in these comments,
is someone who is truly "unfit" to be a parent. Those of us who suffer depression, particularly as a result of abuse, are more likely than the general population to have elevated levels of empathy and a strong motivation to protect our children from what we went through making us better parents than the average person. This is backed up by psychological research. So stop thinking in stereotypes you ignorant, nasty scum.
wow, that sucks, hang in there, and don't take on all her burden, unless you really want to. I've often felt that way through the years as my BFF raised her child. He's turning into a teen now, the cards have been dealt, things land where they land.
My sister is having a baby.
All I see is things that need preparation. It's like going camping. I'm not going to let a friend go out there without food or bugspray.
When I get a travel set(stroller/carseat) at 50% for $90, a bouncer/swing for 50%, and a high chair for %50 as well as a Boppy Pillow for $20, along with clothes for my sister to wear so she's not relegated to oversize men's t-shirts and stretchy black pants during her pregnancy....
They assume I'm looking forward to her having the baby.
No I'm not. My sister hasn't even read the FIRST book I bought her on the babycare basics. I'm anti-thrilled about this.
But again, I'm not about to pass up helpful preparation.
Also, it's been at least $1,500 so far on baby clothes, stuff, prenatal vitamins, preggy clothes, and baby furniture. And that's only so far because she hasn't had to pay for her prenatal care as she's on Medicare. Without it she'd probably already have paid about $5,000 in between regular checkups/tests. This hasn't factored in baby food or doctor visits for the baby once she has it. I kind of want to write up the massive list of baby costs and post it on signs outside of a clinic sometime.
So no, I'm not happy. I'm not thinking "yay, baby!" I'm thinking "shit, she can barely feed herself and her boyfriend only eats fried food. This is going to end up being my job half the time if I'm not careful."
Also, baby was planned baby. They tried for 3 months and the guy still isn't divorced from his ex-wife, and is still disappointed/upset that the baby is going to be a girl and not a boy. He wants her to have another(...they only live in a 2-room trailer) right after this one is born, and then another, if it's not a boy. He's also demanding she have a c-section each time because vagina size.
Now we know why I'm still single. This moron is par for the course where I live.
Thank FUCK I am too smart to fall for a moron like this.
From his post, it doesn't sound like it.
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Moscow, ID- The UCSB Women's Indoor track and field team headed north to compete in two separate meets put on by the hosting University of Idaho Vandals. The Gauchos competed in U of I's Kibbie Dome, which contains a 290m indoor track as well as a football field, a basketball arena and tennis courts. Despite temperatures in the low teens, the Gauchos heated up the dome by placing several athletes in event finals, many going on to record podium finishes.
Vandal Indoor
Friday evening's Vandal Indoor was the season debut for Gaucho sprinter Jennifer Carey in the 400m. Carey picked up her first win of 2014 with a time of 55.37. Dani Moreno and Christine Cooperstein took 6th and 8th in the women's mile, battling with a seasoned group of northwest runners. They finished with times of 5:09.97 and 5:11.48, respectively. Sophomore's Shannon Trumbull and Tori Usgaard qualified for the 60m hurdle final. Trumbull would go on to take 5th with a personal best time of 8.92. Usgaard claimed the 7th spot and had a best of 9.13 in qualifying. Jessica Emde took second in the high jump with a leap of 5'5.
Also making the final for the Gaucho throws squad were Heather Hawes and Kathleen Guzman. Hawes threw a new personal best of 42'11 to take 7th in the shot put. Guzman threw 48'1 to take 7th in the womens weight throw. Earlier in the day, Guzman competed in the women's indoor discus. In the rarely contested event, throwing rubber indoor implements, Guzman finished second with a mark of 131'5. Sophomore Ashley Alama finished third in the women's disc with a mark of 129'8.
Vandal Open
Competing in the second meet of the weekend the Gauchos found their stride as they would go on to record seven top-3 finishes. Jennifer Carey came back to finish in second in the 400m behind Liga Velvere, the former multiple time WAC Champion from Idaho. Shannon Trumbull took third in the 60m hurdles with a time of 9.03. Dani Moreno and Christine Cooperstein paced their heat and would go on to finish in second and third in a field of 40 runners. Moreno clocked a 10:00.94 and Cooperstein finished in 10:06.67.
Emde would again eclipse the 5'5 mark in the high jump, this time for the win. Usgaard was a bar clearance behind at 5'3, good for second place. Guzman fired off a 15.18m weight toss in the second round. Her 49'9.75 mark held for third place.
Next up for the Gauchos will be the Annual Round-Up on February 22nd at Westmont College in Santa Barbara.


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Could Cutting People Off From The Internet Be Dangerous?
from the three-strikes-and-unintended-consequences deptWith the entertainment industry pushing hard for "three strikes" type laws that would kick people off the internet based on three accusations (not convictions) for online copyright infringement, it may be worth asking if there could be some serious unintended consequences associated with doing so. Reader Pickle Monger points us to a story, not about three strike disconnections, but about people taking the extreme step of cutting themselves off, and it quotes psychiatrist Jerald Block who who warns that a sudden disconnection can be quite harmful:
"If you are heavily active [on the internet], by disconnecting you are losing a significant relationship. Those 30 or 40 hours of time now have to be filled with real life."It's worth noting that Dr. Block is the same psychiatrist who, a few years ago, suggested that the Columbine tragedy may have been caused not by the two kids playing violent video games, but from being cut off from those games by their parents:
Dr Block says some people can find it very gratifying, while others find they are not capable of staying disconnected.
However, he believes the worst case scenario is when the decision to disconnect is made by a third party. "It can be a disaster and can even lead to suicide."
When Klebold and Harris are kicked off their computers, few, if any, would recognize just how important their virtual lives were to them. Most people wouldn't even know they were in trouble. That would make the punishment much more severe...Frankly, this theory sounds just about as extreme and unsupportable as the opposite one that blames video games for violence. If you're going to go on a rampage and kill people because you've lost your internet access, you've got bigger problems and issues than too strong a relationship with your computer. However, it does raise a point that is worth discussing: cutting people off suddenly from the internet may have serious unintended consequences. I don't think we'll see a wave of suicides or anything, but it does seem like an extreme response to something like file sharing, and it's at least slightly worrisome that no one pushing for such three strikes laws is even thinking about what impact cutting people off might have.
For heavy computer users, cutting them off can free up 30 or more hours a week. That is a lot of time to fill, especially for an enraged teen with limited social skills. Unwise. The second issue is to recognize that computer users have a relationship with their computers... As silly as it may sound, being cut off from the system might feel something like being cut off from your best friend...
Filed Under: consequences, three strikes


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by Sue Ann Rybak
The Firebirds Team 433, an all-girl robotics team from Mount Saint Joseph Academy in Flourtown, hosted a summer robotics workshop at the Wissahickon Boys and Girls Club in Germantown on Friday, Aug. 10.
More than 100 youth learned about the mechanics of designing a robot, took turns operating robots "Jack-Jack" and "Shark Byte," and even built their own "bristle bot" – part toothbrush, part robot.
"As an underrepresented group in science and technology, we are passionate about bringing the message of FIRST (For Inspiration and Recognition of Science and Technology) and STEM (Science, Technology, Engineering or Math) to other underrepresented communities," said Margaret Mary Rilling, president of Firebird Robotics.
"As a team, we're trying to spread the culture of robotics to other people," said Erin Kelly Tiffany, senior vice president of Firebird Robotics. "So, hopefully, more students in the future will be involved in STEM fields."
U.S. Rep. Chaka Fattah said the workshop was the result of a partnership created between First Robotics, which is the premier engineering robotics-training program in the nation, and the Boys and Girls Clubs of America. Fattah was instrumental in bringing the two organizations together.
"We have a critical need to get more young people interested in STEM-related fields – science, technology, engineering and math," said Fattah, who recently returned from visiting three of NASA's private contractor-entrepreneurs.
He said in the next 15 years, 25 percent of America's engineers will retire.
Fattah said the American Innovation and Mentorship Agreement is designed "to change the lives of millions of the nation's children and, in turn, drive American global scientific leadership." He added that "4,000 boys and girls clubs across the country are now going to be engaged in robotic training programs and competition."
"There's no political speech I am going to give that gets kids interested in building robots," Fattah said, glancing around the room. "You have to get them engaged in activities. The look on their faces says it all."
Nate Knauss, a senior mentor at FIRST, said robotics is a great way to reach kids because it is hands-on.
"In Roadrunner, Acme can build an awesome missile and it always does the same thing every time," said Knauss, who became hooked on robotics as a sophomore in high school after a friend invited him to a FIRST competition. "But, that's not applicable here. The student actually has to understand how the science works and then they have to figure it out. Reading a textbook or doing the proofs doesn't inspire them – using it in real life does."


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Pantone PLUS Solid Chip Pages Coated
Pantone created new versions of their popular Solid Chip Books in January, 2005. These new books had featured larger Pantone chip pages, measuring 5.5"x 9.25", allowing for 25% larger chips of each color and larger type sizes for important descriptive information. In May, 2010 Pantone has enhanced and replaced these pages with the new Pantone Plus Series Pages which feature 224 new colors. These pages have recently been updated with the NEW 2014 Pantone PLUS Pages which can be found by clicking here.
For your choice and convenience, Hyatt's maintains the world's largest inventory of the PMS and Plus pages. Volume discounts are available for 40 or more assorted Pantone replacement pages. Please contact us by phone, fax or e-mail for an individual quotation.
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Sharks' Burish cleared to play in Game 6
San Jose, CA – San Jose Sharks center Adam Burish will return to the lineup for Sunday's Game 6 of the team's Western Conference semifinal series with the Los Angeles Kings.
Burish, one of the Sharks' top penalty killers, has yet to participate in this series due to a broken right hand he sustained while blocking a shot in San Jose's Game 4 win over Vancouver in the opening round back on May 7.
The seven-year veteran is expected to center the fourth line for Sunday's matchup.
San Jose trails the best-of-seven set with the defending Stanley Cup champion Kings 3-2, but has yet to lose in four games at HP Pavilion this postseason.


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Spears confirms she and X Factor are splitting
LOS ANGELES (AP) — Britney Spears said Friday she has made the "difficult decision" to leave Fox's "The X Factor" after one season.
In a statement, the pop singer said she had an incredible time working on the singing contest but that it was time to get back into the studio to record.
It was widely reported Thursday that Spears and "X Factor" were parting ways after a season in which the show's ratings fell and Spears received lackluster reviews as a panelist. Fellow panelist Antonio "L.A." Reid previously announced he was leaving, giving creator-executive producer Simon Cowell two spots to fill.
Fox has been informed of Spears' decision, her publicist, Jeff Raymond said Friday. Fox spokeswoman Gaude Paez confirmed that Spears is leaving the show and said the network had no further statement.
Cowell and fellow producers are discussing replacements for Spears and Reid and will be conferring with Fox, said a person who is familiar with the situation but lacked authority to comment publicly and insisted on anonymity.
Demi Lovato is expected to return as a panelist, joining Cowell and the newcomers.
Spears, 31, said she was proud of the young "X Factor" contestants she helped counsel, but that watching them on stage each week made her miss performing.
"I can't wait to get back out there and do what I love most," she added.
When "X Factor" returns for its third season this fall, Cowell will attempt once again to match the success of the U.K. series he brought to America. After season one, Cowell replaced panelists Paula Abdul and Nicole Scherzinger and host Steve Jones, but Spears and Lovato didn't provide the hoped-for ratings spark, with Spears getting the brunt of criticism from observers.
She received a reported $15 million for one season's work.
Although the series has failed to match Cowell's bold pre-debut predictions, and certainly hasn't eclipsed sister Fox show "American Idol," it has helped shore up the network's fall schedule.


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iThemes Exchange comes with a number of free basic add-ons. These do not need to be purchased or installed. To use them, simply go to the Exchange Add-ons page in your site's dashboard and enable those that you'd like to use.
Exchange Add-Ons are features that you can add or remove depending on your needs. Selling your stuff should only be as complicated as you need it to be. iThemes Exchange comes with a number of built-in Add-on features to enhance the functionality of your online store.
In the Add-ons page, you will see tabs to show all of your add-ons, only those add-ons currently enabled, only those add-ons currently disabled and a Get More tab that will show any add-ons available for purchase.
To enable an add-on, simply click the Disabled button to the right of the add-on. Disabling a plugin works the same way; you'll just click the Enabled button to deactivate the add-on.
You'll notice a gear symbol next to the Enabled button on some of your add-ons. This means that that particular add-on has settings you can adjust. For instance, if you click the gear symbol next to the Digital Downloads add-on, you'll see that you have the option to allow your customer to make a purchase without registering or logging in.


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For Immediate Release
Contact: Joel Wachs (212) 387-7555 JANUARY 26, 2004 The Andy Warhol Foundation for the Visual Arts Announced a Ten-Year, $10 Million Grant to Creative Capital
In a major demonstration of its commitment to America's artists, the Andy Warhol Foundation for the Visual Arts today announced a ten-year, $10 million grant to Creative Capital, a foundation providing grants and professional development support to individual artists. The gift will provide $1 million a year over the next nine years, and an additional $1 million for cash reserves.
Joel Wachs, president of the Warhol Foundation, said that in the few short years since its inception, Creative Capital has become one of the nation's pre-eminent funders in its field. Conceived in response to the funding crisis brought on by the National Endowment of the Arts' elimination of grants to individual artists, the Andy Warhol Foundation took the lead in launching a new organization to provide both grants and support services to worthy artists, bringing together over thirty private donors, individuals and foundations to fund Creative Capital for its first five years.
Since its launch in 1999, Creative Capital has funded 158 noteworthy projects in a variety of media, including film, photography, painting, sculpture and performance. In addition to cash grants, it also provides artists with counsel and assistance for everything from career development and audience building to financial planning, networking and promotional support.
Wachs said, "Creative Capital has shown tremendous creativity in the design of its program, and is also sharing its innovative funding model with other foundations and organizations nationwide. The new Warhol grant will ensure that Creative Capital continues its operations over the next decade, serving new generations of artists in all disciplines."
In order to make the grant, the Warhol Foundation's board voted to increase its grant budget by 20 %, despite the economic downturn of the past few years. Wachs and board chair, Werner Kramarsky, said "It is critically important for our nation to recognize its artists, to value the contributions they make to our society, and to give them the support they need to create their work. Creative Capital is an extraordinary example of an organization that truly understands artists and their needs, and works effectively with them to help achieve their goals. The Warhol Foundation is proud to support Creative Capital, and through it, American art and artists."
Ruby Lerner, Creative Capital's president, added "The paucity of support for individual artists in this country makes it all the more impressive that a major foundation like Warhol is willing to make such a big commitment. Creative Capital is honored to receive this gift, which is a bold and uplifting gesture and a major contribution to the effort to sustain and protect our nation's artists."


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An intra-abdominal abscess is a collection of pus or infected fluid that is surrounded by inflamed tissue inside the belly. It can involve any abdominal organ, or it can settle in the folds of the bowel.
Intra-abdominal abscesses sometimes happen because of another condition. An example might be appendicitis or diverticulitis. Many cases, however, happen after surgery.
Abdominal abscesses can be caused by a bacterial infection. The most common bacteria to cause them are found in the stomach and intestines. One of these is Escherichia coli or E. coli. If left untreated, the bacteria will multiply and cause inflammation and kill healthy tissue.
Abdominal surgery or trauma and conditions, such as diabetes or inflammatory bowel disease, can put you at risk for an intra-abdominal abscess.
If you've recently had surgery or trauma to an abdominal organ and have other risk factors, such as diabetes or inflammatory bowel disease, be on the lookout for signs of an intra-abdominal abscess.
Common symptoms include:
If you have symptoms of an intra-abdominal abscess, your healthcare provider may order tests to look for the presence of infection:
Antibiotics may help treat an infection that could lead to an intra-abdominal abscess. But once the abscess has developed, antibiotics don't work as well for treatment. An intra-abdominal abscess often will need to be drained of fluid in order to heal. Typically, however, antibiotics are given along with draining the abscess. The type of antibiotic will depend on how severe your abscess is, your age, and any other conditions you may have.
One way to remove fluid is through percutaneous drainage. This is a process in which your healthcare provider guides a needle through the skin to the place where the infection is. This is a short procedure. Your healthcare provider will give you a sedative and a local anesthetic to help you relax and eliminate any discomfort or pain while it is being done.
Another way to drain the abscess is with surgery. Surgical procedures may also involve repairing the condition that caused the abscess in the first place, such as a bowel perforation. Sometimes, more than one operation is needed.
Many times, a drainage catheter is left in the abscess cavity after it is drained. This will be checked by the healthcare team and removed when appropriate.
Your outcome will depend on the cause of your infection and how quickly you sought treatment. The right early treatment can significantly improve the outcome for people who develop intra-abdominal abscesses.
While you are being treated for an intra-abdominal abscess, you may need nutritional support. This can be done by placing a feeding tube.
If you've recently had surgery or trauma to an abdominal organ and have other risk factors, such as diabetes or inflammatory bowel disease, and you develop a fever, belly pain, nausea or vomiting, or other symptoms, you should immediately call your healthcare provider.
Tips to help you get the most from a visit to your healthcare provider:


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Expert Advice
Turn a Lock of Hair into a Diamond For Cancer Survivors/Fighters
As a hairdresser, no doubt you've experienced women in your chair who have had to say a painful goodbye to their hair due to the side effects of chemotherapy and radiation.
Designed to empower those fighting and survivors, Sky and Livi, a unique personal diamond jewelry company, has found a way to convert a lock of hair into a lab-created diamond.
"Our company exists to transform a heartbreaking circumstance into an uplifting experience, creating a symbol of strength and beauty," says founder Anjanette Sinesio. "A woman's diamond, fashioned into a beautiful pendant, acts as a tool and symbol of her endurance and victory."
Anjanette Sinesio founded Sky and Livi in 2012 to offer a service and product that helps bring light, beauty, hope and inspiration to the otherwise dark space a woman can find herself in while facing the side effects of cancer treatments.
The company is named after Sinesio's nieces, Skyler and Olivia, who inspire her daily. Sinesio strives to be a positive role model for both Skyler and Olivia, much like her Aunt Barbara, who lost her battle with cancer, was for her. By drawing upon her own expertise, Sinesio developed an inventive way for those undergoing cancer treatments by taking a small lock of their hair and using it to create a carbon profile that, through a detailed scientific process, forms a real and beautiful laboratory-created personal diamond.


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I'm more than a little a curious about Matt's list that included Scott and I (along with a few "don't know yet" replies)...
"Forum Members Annoying Me Right Now"1. HunterOfThePegs
"Forum Members Annoying Me Right Now"1. HunterOfThePegs2. Artoo3. Roton74. ____5. ____
3. Hasbro exclusives- rediculous closed lines..revisited 6 times until line opened then waited almost 2 hours in line Sad
Page created in 0.057 seconds with 18 queries.


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The continued belief in religion is a symbol of the failure of multiculturalism; immigrants, and their subsequent families, are feeling like outsiders in the country they have chosen to call home and subsequently turn to things they know to be familiar in their own culture.
[dropcap]O[/dropcap]n Wednesday 22nd May, the brutal murder of Lee Rigby in Woolwich shocked Britain. To state the obvious, the murder was unjustifiable and downright sickening. Nobody would make any attempt to contend that point, and nor would anyone, of sane mind, begin to attempt to justify the actions of the killers. Undoubtedly, the death of anyone is a humbling event and the tragedy in loss of life cannot be questioned. Yet, over the course of just 24 hours I've heard a host of opinions on the matter – none of which, in my eyes, come even close to exactly what the worst thing about this whole thing is.
I don't have any plans to entertain the opinion of racists, or those who stereotype and discriminate in the most uneducated way. For the most part, I think Britain is in agreement that the killers do not represent any faction of Islam – the notable exception being the so-called English Defence League (whose overwhelming membership can be summed up by a delightful video). An opinion that I have found to be extremely common is one that emphasises the harmful role of religion. In this respect, I fully agree; religion has unparalleled power in the lives of 'believers'. It must be stressed that this is the case in all religions: Christianity, Judaism, Hinduism, and indeed Islam. By virtue of the sheer profundity of their beliefs religious followers have the capacity to be further indoctrinated – and so extremism is born.
Religion is the sigh of the oppressed creature, the heart of a heartless world, and the soul of soulless conditions. It is the opium of the people. (Karl Marx, Contribution to the Critique of Hegel's Philosophy of Right, Introduction, p. 1, 1843)
If you had to make a list of quotes that had been overused, misquoted, and taken well out of context, Karl Marx's reference to religion would be high up there. Few understand that Marx's critique of religion is not actually that – it is a critique of society. People are quick, and perhaps with reasonable justification, to criticise the role played by religion for a variety of reasons: a) religious extremism fuels the majority of terrorism, b) religion advocates a number of prejudices and outdated laws, and c) religion highlights the incompatible blend of cultures. Religion does all these things, but what if religion is the symptom rather than the disease?
Why is it that, in a country as educated as Britain, that people choose to ignore scientific evidence and subject themselves to the subordination of a deity or scriptures? In the less economically developed world religion acts as an outlet of hope, born out of intrinsic necessity in such insufferable conditions. Thus, the only discernible conclusion to make is that the fulfilment gained from social bonds and interactions is inadequate; people turn to religion as a result of a broken society. In all respects it is true that the madmen who acted so horrifically in Woolwich were not acting out on the behest of social shortcomings, but their initial turn to religion was probably because of this.
The continued belief in religion is a symbol of the failure of multiculturalism; immigrants, and their subsequent families, are feeling like outsiders in the country they have chosen to call home and subsequently turn to things they know to be familiar in their own culture. It is a damning indictment of British society and social policy, that religion takes precedence over a British national identity. Never has it been more evident, than from the thick British accent of a terrorist, that certain communities are becoming isolated and alienated from the rest of British society. Obviously, this is not a justification for terrorism – I can only place that as a consequence of immoral, unscrupulous thinking, if not outright insanity. Don't get me wrong; I'm all for people believing in what they want to believe, it just shouldn't come at the expense of national pride – British togetherness. It is a sad fact that, because of our broken society, notions of national belonging and identity play second fiddle to religious beliefs.
Religion did not cause the events of Woolwich. However, if religion had not existed – if the killers had been secular, it would have been hard to imagine the barbaric murder of a soldier taking place, as it happened.
Photo Credit: Mig_R


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DeviceNet baghouse controller
The baghouse controller features Device
Net communications for integration with Allen-Bradley PLCs. DeviceNet is a simple networking solution that reduces the cost and time required to wire and in-
stall industrial automation devices and is a highly effective way to provide access to information in intelligent controls. The company's B-PAC series of baghouse performance analyzers and controllers feature advanced intelligence such as the ability to instantly detect and locate failed solenoids and filter leaks. The controllers also lower energy use by employing intelligent pulse cleaning. The...


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Update Available
An updated version of firmware is available for your Router
F7D7302 Share Wireless Router
Firmware Version Information:
Belkin Wireless Router Version : 1.00.25
Release Date : 03/30/2011
Image location :http://networking.belkin.com/update/files/F7D7302/v1/WW/F7D7302_WW_1.00.25.bin
If you wish to update the firmware in your Belkin Router, click 'Download NOW' below to get the file. Save the file to a folder on your computer where you can find it later. Browse to the file from the 'Firmware Update' page. Select the file, then click 'Update'.
Click here for full instructions
NOTE: You will need Adobe Acrobat Reader to view this document.
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You might be wondering what I'm up to with a title like Head Cheese. So many times we encourage people to give family recipes as genealogical gifts to non-genealogists. Afterall, who wouldn't want a recipe for something grandma cooked. Well, in my family you may not have the stomach for it.
Now, I'm sorry to all those who love head cheese out there. I realize my grandma made it out of necessity, making due with what you have. And I loved my grandma dearly. But unfortunately, I just don't have it in me to eat it. Luckily for me her head cheese making days were over by the time I came along.
If you are wondering what head cheese is, it is not a cheese product. It's basically the head of a pig boiled down and mashed and then formed into a loaf. A recipe for it is at http://www.cooks.com/rec/view/0,1626,144187-250192,00.html. A granddaughter must have thought the whole notion was funny and video recorded her grandmother describing how to make it on You Tube. You can catch the 56 second video at http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lCUpXRFloGk.