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Which direction should casement windo... (post #166119)
Is there any design consensus, on where the hinge side of the casement window should be located?
- so that the open window catches the prevailing breezes ?
- not catch the breezes ?
- all face the same direction, on any given side of a house ?
- flip a coin ?
(post #166119, reply #1 of 36)
Most windows are mulled for you with latches in the middle of a double set.
near the stream,
(post #166119, reply #2 of 36)
Right, if it's a symmetrical mulled window, then of course the hinges are on the outside.
But back to my original question, what if it's just a single operating sash ???
(post #166119, reply #3 of 36)
(post #166119, reply #4 of 36)
Outward? That's odd..In the two houses that I've lived in that had casement windows, they opened inward.
(post #166119, reply #5 of 36)
I've only seen outward opening sashes.
But given an outward opening, single (not mulled) sash, is the hinge side simply chosen arbitrarily ??
(post #166119, reply #6 of 36)
I think the direction they open should alternate. That way you could open one of them for the breeze to enter, and another for the air to exit. Gives you a lot of flexability in ventilating.
(post #166119, reply #7 of 36)
You know, if you tilt that over on its side, you'd have an awning window, which you could leave open in the rain.
(post #166119, reply #8 of 36)
when you go fishing, which hand do you reel with? just order them so you crank with that hand.
Seriously, I've never seen any "forumla" for which way a window opens. I don't think there is such a thing. My experience is that they alternate, unless the location would dictate the hinging.
(post #166119, reply #9 of 36)
you can order thenm either way.. and you either do it for symmetry... or for a specific need...
your choice..
(post #166119, reply #10 of 36)
The dual function casement/hopper windows in Europe typically swing open or tilt - both inwards.
Not sure about the wisdom of casement windows that open inwards....
Are they more sensible about something we don't know ?
(post #166119, reply #11 of 36)
>I've trimmed a good many casement windows and every time I've seen one that looked odd to me and bothered to ask, the builder has always had a good reason for setting the window that way. i.. It's set that way to catch the breeze , or it's set that way so that it opens opposite the one on the other side of the house.
>In my opinion there is no way a casement window "should" be set. Set the window so that it opens to catch the best breeze. After all that's what windows are for. If you or your client is concerned with how the window "should" look, then set it so that it opens away from the closest corner of the house. In the end though the window should be functional.
(post #166119, reply #12 of 36)
>I've trimmed a good many casement windows and every time I've seen one that looked odd to me and bothered to ask, the builder has always had a good reason for setting the window that way. i.. It's set that way to catch the breeze , or it's set that way so that it opens opposite the one on the other side of the house.
>In my opinion there is no way a casement window "should" be set. Set the window so that it opens to catch the best breeze. After all that's what windows are for. If you or your client is concerned with how the window "should" look, then set it so that it opens away from the closest corner of the house. In the end though the window should be functional.
(post #166119, reply #13 of 36)
I'm not 100% sure on this, but I'm pretty sure casements open in the opposite direction in which they close. Hope that helps ;-)
(post #166119, reply #14 of 36)
I think mike is correct in saying that the orientation of casement windows is based on asthetics. This is surely the primary reason although certain features of the house may warrant their opening from a certain side too.
As for prevailing breezes, casement windows really stink for getting a good breeze through.
They do typically open by swinging outward. Maybe someone installed a few inside-out (don't laugh, I've seen it done with doublehungs). If they opened inward, the sash would be banging your hand and the crank and be in the way of people and things in the room that may damage it. The poor thing about casements though is that their screens are on the inside. I would prefer doublehungs or gliders any day of the week.
(post #166119, reply #15 of 36)
Pete, You're right!!! On this matter we agree!!!!!
(post #166119, reply #16 of 36)
Some architectural magazine had an article on casement windows not that long ago and suggested that they should all open towards the centre of a wall. If it's one unbroken wall, then the line would go right down the centre, if the wall is divided into segments, then each segment should have it's own centre-line.
The exception (why are there always so many exceptions ?), was when you had multiple units (like a double, or two casements with a fixed pane netween them), then the unit gets it's own centre-line.
(post #166119, reply #17 of 36)
I officially rescind my previous commentary and replace it with the exact opposite information. People have to have certain absolutes in their lives like taxes, death and me & Frenchy disagreeing. I wouldn't want to be screwing up the balances of nature.
Pete "for the good of mankind" Draganic
(post #166119, reply #18 of 36)
O.K. Pete,
I offically recind ..MY.. previous commentary and...
So, does this mean we reagree?!!???
(post #166119, reply #19 of 36)
It apears that we are in the midst of a paradox. I expect the universe will collapse upon itself any moment now.
(post #166119, reply #20 of 36)
Speaking of inward vs outward --
Around here (Han[JOBSITE WORD] Park, Beverly Hills, Hollywood) most of the windows on older houses are inward opening casements.
In Vienna and Moscow, I've seen a lot of permanent installations in which each window had both inward and outward opening sashes. This results in two sheets of glass 4" - 6" apart with an air space trapped between when all are closed. This greater distance is supposed to make them much more efficient insulators than the closer spaced double glazed sash that we're familiar with. Over there they really need that. It's sort of like having permanent storm windows. Also, instead of crank mechanisms, they usually have either a rod and thumbscrew arrangement, or just a long hook and eye -- very simple. Does anybody know if this double layer casement arrangement has a special name?
(post #166119, reply #21 of 36)
Casement windows are BAD. The wear out and break and people want you to fix them & old parts are hard to come by. Blah-blah-blah.
(post #166119, reply #22 of 36)
Jimbo, if you tilt it on it's other side and install from inside you got a hopper window. Wow I never knew casements were so versatile .
(post #166119, reply #23 of 36)
John - Are you sure about that "...greater distance...more efficient..." thing? I always heard that anything over an inch between the panes and you start to get weather cycles in there. I think it might even be less than an inch.
(post #166119, reply #24 of 36)
John, EXACTLY! We lived in an older home in La Crescenta (not all that far from Hollywood) that was probably built in the '30's. Inward opening casements with screens on the outside. Same for our present house in SLC. Very simple arrangement that seems to guarantee long-lasting windows. Also there is no impediment to air moving into the house. Window treatments, however, can be difficult.
(post #166119, reply #25 of 36)
Pete, Frenchy: Is this an example of Paradoxical Motion in the textbooks?
Oh yes: Out, hinge outside, latch center.
(post #166119, reply #26 of 36)
Jim --
Re: #23 -- You'll certainly get a convection cycle, no matter what the distance. Air near the cold surface will be cooled, and go down, air near the hot surface will be warmed and go up. With a greater distance between the panes, I'd expect a smaller percentage of the total volume to be involved in this cycle.
(post #166119, reply #27 of 36)
The outward swinging casement is an American original. In the rest of the world, casements open to the inside of the house (and often tilt as well) just like a door.
The advantages of in-swinging casements can be: greater ventilation, keeping the window out of the weather when open, and screens on the outside.
The disadvantages can be: Difficult weatherstripping and loss of space on the inside of the house (windows swings over windowsiill). The loss of space is particularly problematic where a window seat is installed or where it is desirable to use the sill as a shelf, such as over a kitchen window.
I've built both in the same house, as the situation dictates. Hope this helps.
(post #166119, reply #28 of 36)
That's not your real name, is it?
(post #166119, reply #29 of 36)
inswing windows are a lot more likely to get cleaned on a regular basis, too.
(post #166119, reply #30 of 36)
>Casement windows are BAD. The wear out and break and people want you to fix them & old parts are hard to come by. Blah-blah-blah.
You mean the crank and gear mechanisms, right, not the actual windows? My house has both casement and double hung original windows from 1926, and the casements have lasted better and stayed tighter than the double hungs. But they're just simple casements, two hinges and a latch, no stupid crank and lever arm. They open inward, so you don't really need the mechanism.


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A change has been made to the December 8 lineup for UFC on FOX 5, albeit one delivering a new match-up with divisional ramifications equivalent to those of the original pairing. Rather than battling Bryan Caraway at the event, bantamweight Mike Easton will now face submission specialist Raphael Assuncao on the evening's undercard as a result of Caraway suffering some sort of injury while training for the tilt.
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Comparably, the 13-1 Easton is on the cusp of title-contendership and could come close to solidifying his claim with a victory over Assuncao. He was last seen outpointing Ivan Menjivar in July at UFC 148.

subset: commoncrawl


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6 Dog-Friendly Spots to Take Your Pooch in the Hamptons
Calling your dog your best friend is an understatement. She's always ready to cheer you up after a long day, with no judgment about that second fourth glass of wine or the fact that you occasionally eat Ben & Jerry's for dinner. Which is why you'd never leave her behind when you head out east every summer. Thankfully, you don't have to: Here are six spots where your pup is totally welcome.
RELATED: Pick Your Poison: The Best Wineries, Breweries and Distilleries in the Hamptons
Gather your favorite four-legged friend and head to this East Hampton park for an all-day excursion. Start with a hike through the numerous trails (FYI, letting your dog chase the wild turkeys is frowned upon), then gawk at the historic lighthouse before claiming a barbecue for an afternoon grill sesh.
5 Cedar Point Rd., East Hampton; 631-852-7620 or suffolkcountyny.gov
The whimsical hotel in East Hampton is a dream retreat for anyone looking to spend a weekend out east—you'll find a cozy bar, a gourmet restaurant, luxe rooms and even private cottages—but it's especially so for dog owners. Well-behaved pooches are welcome to spend a night or two at the hotel. They'll even have a "dog concierge" to help them make the most of their stay.
207 Main St., East Hampton; 631-324-5006 or themaidstone.com
While you feast on the bounty of the East End with an alfresco farm-to-table meal at Sag Harbor's Page at 63 Main or Back Page (the adjacent patio), your pooch can be right there with you, munching on an organic dog biscuit.
63 Main St., Sag Harbor; 631-725-1810 or page63main.com
Take your precious pup for an early morning workout sesh (or leisurely stroll) on one of the Hamptons' beaches. Most allow dogs before 9 a.m. and after 7 p.m. during the summer (including East Hampton's gorgeous Main Beach and Ditch Plains in Montauk), and in the off-season, there are even fewer restrictions. Who's up for a game of fetch?
Confirm pet-friendly towns with your local beach: suffolkcountyny.gov
The only thing better than an afternoon of wine tasting at a picturesque vineyard is doing so with a dog snoozing at your feet. Your pooch (leashed) is welcome to sit outside with you at breathtaking Duck Walk South.
231 Montauk Hwy., Water Mill; 631-726-7555 or duckwalk.com
For those poor souls without a dog, you can briefly borrow one at Montauk Brewery thanks to the resident pup. Sit outside at a picnic table and rub her belly while you sip on one of the brewery's seven varieties of beer. (Patrons' dogs are also totally welcome.)
62 S. Erie Ave., Montauk; 631-668-8471 or montaukbrewingco.com


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Annual 2009
The following represents an assessment of the weather experienced across the UK during 2009 and how it compared with the averages for the period 1971 to 2000.
Daily maximum, minimum and mean temperatures were generally about 0.5 °C above the 1971-2000 average across the UK, making 2009 a slightly warmer year than 2008 and the equal 15th warmest in a series from 1910. Spring and autumn were both very mild and the summer was slightly warmer than average.
In contrast, January was cold in the south of the UK and the year ended with a spell of very cold, snowy weather from mid-December.
Annual rainfall was somewhat above average for the UK overall. 2009 was the twelfth-wettest in a series from 1910 - similar to 2007 but not as wet as 2008. With the exception of Northern Ireland and western Scotland, spring was relatively dry. The summer was wet (the third disappointing summer in a row) and comparable to 2008. It was the wettest July on record in England and Wales. The unsettled weather continued through August before a return to drier weather, although north-east Scotland received well above average rainfall through September and October with some serious flooding. Mild, wet weather persisted through November, making it the wettest on record across the UK. Severe flooding occurred in the Lake District after prolonged rainfall. The year ended with some widespread snowfalls, particularly in Scotland, northern and eastern England.
2009 was a sunny year across the UK, the main exception being the Scottish Borders; it was the twelfth-sunniest in a series from 1929. March and December were particularly sunny compared to normal.
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Sunshine percent of average map for the year 2009
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January 19, 2018
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Adding wheels to a basket is a great way to increase its functionality. The good news is that you don't have to spend big bucks to buy a rolling basket when you can make one yourself. That's exactly what Tanya from twelveOeight did when a rolling basket from Pottery Barn had her drooling. Tanya freshened up an old wicker basket with paint and then added casters to complete the update for a grand total of $10!
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I dare you to deny Allah, you pussy! [YOU RESPOND]
From: [email protected]
Sent: Saturday, February 23, 2008 10:59 AM
Subject: [General Question] Blasphemy
Karen sent a message using the contact form at
If you really are not affraid, I sugest you throw Islam into the mix.
Muslims are currently responsible for killing more Christians in the last
10 years than you could ever hope to insult. Try saying you dont believe in
Muhammad's teachings. According to their beliefs they still hunt down and
kill blasphemers. I mean if you really are serious that you are not
affraid. Also you truly do not subscribe to the notion that God exsist. As
religions go Muslims are the largest church in the world now. So why are
you waisting your time with christians, go after the big dogs!
FROM KELLY, ROOK, AND SAPIENT: We deny the existence of Allah, he doesn't exist, Muslims are wrong.
Atheist Books, purchases on Amazon support the Rational Response Squad server.
I deny the existence of Allah.
And about the violence against Christians, it's whining like that keeps the violence going. The eye for an eye attitude is one of the most preminet similarities of the big three faiths.
Are you really proud that your religion kills a lot of people?
I deny the message of the prophet Mohammed, the quran, and all the other bullshit that goes with it.
Hell yes I deny Allah. I'm no fan of Christianity either, but there are scores of Atheists attacking Christianity. It's almost trendy. My pet peeves are Islam, because it is in my opinion the biggest threat, and Paganism, b/c it's just so stupid and trendy. The only people who put either religion down most of the time are Christians, although that doesn't mean I think Christians are great either.
Worldwide, it's much easier to bash Christianity than Islam...just look at Salman Rushdie for fuck's sake.
Bashing Xainity is the same thing as bashing Islam, and ALL god of abe crap, and ALL superstition dogma stupidity of idol worship in any color or definition.
If you really are not affraid, I sugest you throw Islam into the mix.
Muslims are currently responsible for killing more Christians in the last
10 years than you could ever hope to insult. Try saying you dont believe in
Muhammad's teachings. According to their beliefs they still hunt down and
kill blasphemers. I mean if you really are serious that you are not
affraid. Also you truly do not subscribe to the notion that God exsist. As
religions go Muslims are the largest church in the world now. So why are
you waisting your time with christians, go after the big dogs!
I deny Allah, and the Muslim faith.
As to your ascersion that Muslims are the largest Church in the world, do your research. Like many christian claims, this statement of yours is an outright lie.
Oh, and Islam doesn't have churches. They have mosques.
When anyone finds something to really worship , do let me know ... I will want to check it out ....
You may worship me. I am far superior to any and all gods mentioned in this topic.
Proud Canadian, Enlightened Atheist, Gaming God.
I deny all gods, deities, supreme beings, saviors, and all religions of any kind, anywhere.
Islam is just another bad piece of ancient fiction.
Sorry Allah is wrong also.
In conclusion, Kuss Umak ya min Ghabah!!!
If you really are unafraid, I suggest you throw Islam into the mix.
Muslims are currently responsible for killing more Christians in the last
10 years than you could ever hope to insult. Try saying you dont believe in
Muhammad's teachings. According to their beliefs they still hunt down and
kill blasphemers. I mean if you really are serious, then you are not
afraid. Also you truly do not subscribe to the notion that God exists. As
religions go, Islam is the largest religion in the world now. So why are
you wasting your time with Christians? Go after the big dogs!
Hi kpbonrilla,
First of all, Allah doesn't exist, Islam is bullshit, Muhammad's a pedophile, and Muslims are wrong. There, I denied Allah. You can take back the comment about me being a pussy now. I'm not afraid of anybody hunting me down because of my beliefs, what matters is that I announced them to the world instead of holding my peace.
The thing about criticizing Islam is that most people are not familiar with it. It's not a big religion in American society, and most Americans tend to look upon it with suspicion as is. There are people out there who criticize Islam, but I'm not one of them. patcondell on YouTube is an atheist who criticizes Islam though - if you want to see a share of bashing not typically available on this forum, check his videos out.
Islam is a fast-growing religion, but it's still not as big as Christianity. See the snazzy pie chart?
SevenScarletSharks reserves the right to be better than you.
I do not believe in Allah Mohammed Muslims Christians Mormons and Jews
I hold firm to my belief that all fat people should be jolly
Here's a cartoon commissioned by me and drawn by one of the members of my forum at GraveyardoftheGods.com:
Reality is the graveyard of the gods.
There is no god but Alan.
I deny Allah!!!
I deny Yahweh!!!
I deny Zeus!!!
I deny all gods, am ofcoarse afraid of none of them. Check out my new posted topic a list of gods i deny. Any others wish to join me???
Who deleted the link to the cartoon mentioned in my previous message and why was it removed?
Reality is the graveyard of the gods.
Muslims say "No god but Allah." They are only half right.
So, no moderator is willing to respond to my question? From the rules:
"Moderators are subject to the House Rules on par with all other members."
"If a moderator must edit a post to remove offending remarks, a note will be made by mod."
At this time, that first quotation appears to be bullshit.
Reality is the graveyard of the gods.
So, no moderator is willing to respond to my question? From the rules:
"Moderators are subject to the House Rules on par with all other members."
"If a moderator must edit a post to remove offending remarks, a note will be made by mod."
At this time, that first quotation appears to be bullshit.
No one tampered with your pic link
it was not formatted correctly
People who think there is something they refer to as god don't ask enough questions.
That seems unlikely to me. As I recall, I simply copied the URL from the browser address bar and pasted it into the message. Then, previewed the message and tested the link as it appeared in there and it worked. I know that eye-witnesses are notoriously unreliable but...
[shrug] Oh well, here goes another try:
Reality is the graveyard of the gods.
For the record, there is a working link in the post directly above mine.
Our revels now are ended. These our actors, | As I foretold you, were all spirits, and | Are melted into air, into thin air; | And, like the baseless fabric of this vision, | The cloud-capped towers, the gorgeous palaces, | The solemn temples, the great globe itself, - Yea, all which it inherit, shall dissolve, | And, like this insubstantial pageant faded, | Leave not a rack behind. We are such stuff | As dreams are made on, and our little life | Is rounded with a sleep. - Shakespeare
My apologies. I see that you fixed it.
I tried to edit my post immediately preceding this one but your system was one cooperating with me and I was unable to do so. Please delete that post.
Reality is the graveyard of the gods.
Mohammed united all these scattered lil' nations and stopped a LOT of killing and bloodshed. He also managed to get a few more rights for women and children. that's just some history for you. it's really weird to me that you're only seeing his religious beliefs instead of what he actually did. i totally respect him for uniting those nations and tryinig to bring some peace to the area and also for trying to make life better for women and children at that time.
it bothers me that really awful things are being said in comlete ignorance of what Mo' (PBUH) actually did. and P.S. child brides were part of the culture, people. yeah it's sick, and i definitely disagree with it, but at the time people didn't see it that way.
blowing bubbles in the rain...
I deny Allah for the same reason I deny Thor. You will not get 72 virgins as a result of an invisible brain with no cerebellum or neurons can knock up Mary or magically bang clouds together to make lightening.
Allah is as real as Jesus and Harry Potter. I hope the Harry Potter fans don't turn fiction into religion like the assholes of the past who continue to divide humanity.
Allah is the result of the same human imagination as Dungeons and Dragons and as useful to the species from protecting the planet from meteors as Ra was in protecting Horus being attacked by Set.
Allah, and Jesus will protect humans from harm as much as Thot protected the extinction of Isis and Osirus, who are dead in our current culture. Myth is a placebo.
I would love to be saved by Xena Warrior Princess, but I do not delude myself into thinking she is real.
"We are a nation of Christians and Muslims, Jews and Hindus -- and nonbelievers."Obama
Check out my poetry here on Rational Responders Like my poetry thread on Facebook under BrianJames Rational Poet also on twitter under Brianrrs37
Lost Verses of the Koran Surah 115: The Pig
The hurried flight of the Hegira had led the Muslims to a fertile oasis, where they were at last safe from their many enemies in Mecca.
Pausing, each thanked Allah the moon-god for their good fortune.
Assembling at a long table, they enjoyed rare delicacies brought by bare-breasted sirens whose faces were veiled. During the feast Muhammad sternly forbade his disciples to partake of pig flesh, while fondling the youthful breasts of a Nubian harlot named Sheba.
Obeying the Prophet, the pilgrims partook of the succulent flesh of jackals and vultures, washing their food down with strong wine.
"I never dreamed I'd have to eat the loins of a jackal, let alone the bitter entrails of a cursed vulture," observed a hungry pilgrim named Ahmed to a fellow Muslim, choking on the unpalatable morsels.
"Neither did I, but the Holy Prophet has ordered it," grumbled another starving follower, almost heaving as he consumed greasy vulture flesh.
"A rancid pork chop would taste a hell of a lot better than this crap does," retorted Ahmed.
"It's an acquired taste brother, you'll get used to it," spoke up another, smiling with a mouthful of rotten teeth.
"I don't think so," said Ahmed, forcing down a burned jackal testicle.
An uncaring Muhammad, famished, greedily wolfed down roasted jackal in enjoyment, quaffing from an earthenware wine carafe on occasion, while choosing which of the sirens that would soon endure his favours.
The meal finished in the late afternoon, a drunken, lustful Muhammad initiated a sex orgy with the sirens, the debauched Holy Prophet, Allah speaking through him, declaring all earlier betrothals or marriages of the women he knew null and void. The Muslims celebrated their good fortune, again thanking Allah for the bounty they had been blessed to receive.
Later, as Muhammad sat half-naked under a palm tree, masturbating to the thought of molesting little girls, Ahmed chanced by and remarked, "Oh great prophet, why does Allah say that we cannot dine on delicious porcine flesh?"
"Why?" asked Muhammad, closing his filthy, tattered, moth-eaten robe, "Because Allah's younger retarded cyclops brother is a pig, and Allah doesn't want us killing his holy kinfolk."
"Allah is a pig?" asked Ahmed, staring at Muhammad.
"Of course," replied the deranged Prophet, hallucinating thanks to ingesting strong hashish minutes earlier.
"That's ridiculous, why in hell do we worship pigs?" asked Ahmed, thinking his flight from Mecca may have been the result of heeding the words of a false prophet, possessed of a capricious desert demon who delighted in seeing them consume the flesh of vermin.
"Because they're better than we are," answered a smiling Muhammad, now fantasising about raping little boys, "Look at me, I'm little more than a lecherous child molester, thief and murderer!"
"True, but pigs can't even talk!" exclaimed Ahmed, digging a heel into the sand.
"Allah can, he speaks to me in my dreams," retorted the wildly hallucinating Muhammad, barely able to focus on Ahmed, seeing him in double vision.
"You're a madman," declared a disgusted Ahmed, "I'm heading back to join the infidels in Mecca!"
"Who cares?" retorted Muhammad, slurring his words and breaking into riotous laughter.
Prophet Muhammad, opening his robe and again reaching for his flaccid sex organ, was too occupied with masturbating his building erection to reply further, while Ahmed disappeared behind a sand dune.
"What a stupid, perverted, licentious bastard," spat Ahmed, walking off, "Muhammad is crazier than a shithouse rat!"
Surah 116: The Pervert
And it came to pass that Muhammad was growing ever hornier and more depraved: In a dream it was revealed by Allah that he was to molest a young girl named Ayesha.
Drunk on strong wine, the Prophet looked to a follower named Khalil and announced, "Allah has said I am to have sex on this day with a child; the virgin daughter of my brother in law Abu."
"What?" asked a frowning Khalil, holding a wine bottle, taken back by the remark and turning to Muhammad.
"I am to know Abu's daughter Ayesha," declared Muhammad, a finger in the air, becoming visibly aroused at the thought having sex with her.
"She is but a little girl who plays with dolls; her womb does not yet weep, are you insane?" asked Khalil, knowing in his heart that the Prophet was little more than a pervert, thief, liar and murderer.
"Probably, but it is the will of Allah", Muhammad said to himself, staggering off to the hovel of Ayesha.
"What a twisted devil the Prophet is – the will of Allah my ass, he's just an evil, depraved monster who lusts after the flesh," Khalil mumbled, putting the bottle to his parched lips.
An oblivious and uncaring Muhammad blundered down the street, weaving as he went, arriving at the hovel shortly thereafter.
Knocking on the door, Ayesha's mother Umm appeared. "What do you want Prophet?" she asked, staring at the debauched Muhammad, clad in a filthy tan robe covered in dust and wine stains, a lone flea crawling upon his moustache near his nostrils.
"Bismillah, I am here to take your daughter Ayesha in bed," the Prophet answered, slurring his words.
"You licentious beast!" exclaimed the girl's mother, "She is only six years old, if it is indeed the will of Allah, take me instead to satisfy your wanton depravity!"
"Taking you is not the will of Allah," retorted Muhammad, the scent of wine heavy on his foul breath, "You are a wrinkled and faded flower without comeliness; be gone with your favours; I could never get a hard on at the likes of you."
Enraged by her rebuff, Muhammad smote her upon the face with a backhand.
"That's what one gets for disobeying the will of Allah," declared Muhammad, his words punctuated by a loud belch, "Take me to Ayesha, that I may know her on this day!"
Obeying, Umm reluctantly led Muhammad to the room of Ayesha, opening the door. "This perverted Prophet here wants to screw you," announced Umm with a frown, Muhammad ogling the virgin child in double vision.
"But you knew my cousin Abdullah, younger brother of Ahmed not an hour ago," replied a shocked Ayesha, dropping her doll, revolted by the sight of the filthy, lascivious paedophile Muhammad.
"Be that as it may, Allah has said I will also know you," said Muhammad with an expectant smile, the gleam of lust in his eyes.
"Why me?" asked Ayesha, looking to the Prophet with trepidation.
"Because Allah has said it and I am horny, let us lay down, that I may know you," ordered Muhammad as he removed his robe, Ayesha's mother shaking her head in helpless disgust and closing the door.
Surah 117: The Murderer
Muhammad and his followers enjoyed many days away from Mecca at the oasis, home of his oafish brother in law, Abu Bakr, who was also Muslim.
Dining on roast jackal, vultures and snakes, their strength was renewed by the bounty Allah the moon-god provided: plentiful food for their bellies and plentiful sirens for their carnal pleasure.
Khalil was upset that the Prophet was an evil lecherous paedophile who had known a little girl, so he went to the home of Ayesha to speak with her father, Abu the oaf.
He made his way to the hovel, and knocked on the door.
Ayesha's mother opened the door, frowning as she beheld another of Prophet Muhammad's followers. "Is life not bad enough, what are you here for, to rape my daughter, me, or one of my sons?" she inquired with disdain.
"Indeed not woman, I must speak with your husband, not you," said Khalil, who as a good Muslim, looked down upon women as little more than objects of pleasure, or dogs to be beaten into submission.
"My husband Abu is very drunk," she related, lowering her gaze in respect.
Khalil entering the hovel, the oaf Abu appeared from a side room holding a wine bottle, and slurred, "What do you want here, follower of the Prophet?"
"I must speak with you regarding your little daughter Ayesha," answered Khalil.
"What about her?" asked Abu, blinking his eyes and trying to focus on the man.
"The Prophet came unto her in her room a fortnight ago; do you not know?" asked Khalil.
"He has come unto her many times since, she is his wife," replied the unconcerned oaf.
"His wife you say - you permitted it?" asked Khalil, stunned by the revelation.
"Of course; he has come unto one of my nephews too, Muhammad is a paederast, it is the will of Allah," declared a shrugging Abu.
"He's raping our child you drunken bastard!" exclaimed a tearful Umm, looking to Khalil.
Abu smote her across the face, admonishing, "Take care woman, speak not ill of Prophet Muhammad, it is the will of Allah. The Prophet first knew Ayesha in a dream, when Gabriel showed her to him, uncovering her body for him to see."
"That's really sick, she's only six years old," observed Khalil.
"Better for the great Prophet to know her than one of the infidels," declared a smiling Abu.
"Prophet my ass, Muhammad is a depraved monster possessed of a demon; how could you permit such a thing, you are her father!" exclaimed Khalil in utter disgust.
"Yes I am, and the Prophet says I will know her too," confessed Abu, contemplating the odd thought of having sex with his own daughter.
Umm burst into tears and sobbed, throwing herself to the floor upon hearing Abu's repugnant words.
A fearful Khalil fled the hovel, not knowing what to think; realising Muhammad and his brother in law Abu were wicked licentious perverts and vicious rapers of children, possessed of capricious and malevolent demons.
Later, Abu spoke with the Prophet while they entered a brothel together. He told him of the strange encounter with Khalil.
Khalil's an idiot, he takes Islam much too seriously," replied Muhammad, looking to his oafish brother in law.
"It is a bad omen Prophet, Khalil woefully disdains your marriage to Ayesha, and disdains that I am to know her too," declared Abu, even he feeling deep down that such a liaison was distasteful, but knowing it was the unalterable will of Allah, the moon god.
"It is the will of Allah for you to know your daughter, did not Lot of Sodom know his daughters in the cave?" asked a slurring Muhammad, quite drunk, leaning against a wall to steady himself.
"Yes Prophet, he did," answered Abu with firm resolve.
"Indeed, it was and is Allah's will," replied Muhammad, picking a flea from his beard and crushing it between his fingernails, "As for our problem, I will have a dream tonight, and Allah will order me to kill Khalil."
"He will?" asked Abu, putting a hand to his chin in confusion, "But I thought the Perfect, Most Merciful Pig Allah never revealed his intentions until you had a dream."
"No matter oaf, he is making his will known to me by making me drink strong wine on this day," said a quickly lying Muhammad, holding up a bottle.
"Don't you drink strong wine everyday?" asked Abu.
"Not as strong as this stuff," replied the Prophet with a broad smile, "It has hashish oil in it; let us partake of a pair of this brothel's women and enjoy wine together."
As Muhammad and Abu descended into more revelry and debauchery, a troubled Khalil approached another of the Prophet's followers, the one with rotten teeth. Telling him of his woes, he awaited the reply.
"Who cares what he does, have vulture and some wine," said the man, tearing a leg from a roasted, maggot-ridden carcass and offering it to Khalil.
"You don't care that Muhammad is a deranged pervert who has sex with little children?" asked Khalil, taking the leg.
"Hell no, I'm only here for the food, I was starving in the alleys of Mecca before I met Muhammad," replied the rotten toothed man, grabbing more vulture flesh and a wine bottle.
"Oh," answered a defeated Khalil, taking a bite from the leg and reaching for wine.
Late evening came, with Khalil and the other followers drunk and passed out in their tent. Muhammad and Abu awoke at the brothel after midnight, rested and refreshed.
"What are we to do about Khalil?" asked Abu as they left via a side door, avoiding an encounter with the brothel's madam, to whom they owed money.
"Leave that to me oaf," answered the Prophet, holding up a hand, "In my dream Allah told me how to deal with him."
Muhammad headed down the street and stealthily entered the tent of his followers, intent on taking Khalil's life. Abu Bakr followed him through the entrance, looking about for possible witnesses. Holding an oiled leather garrote, the smiling Prophet mercilessly strangled the sleeping Khalil, knowing in his heart that it was the will of Allah. The helpless follower struggled defiantly as a determined Muhammad gritted his teeth and pulled the garrote tighter, crushing Khalil's windpipe, the Prophet letting out foul gas from his posterior due to the exertion. The struggling ceased; he and Abu then quietly removed the body from the tent and carried it into the desert.
"That takes care of that problem," declared a satisfied Muhammad as he pocketed the garrote, he and Abu making their way to his hovel so he could know his young wife Ayesha again.
"When will I know her Prophet?" inquired Abu in the lamplit hovel, looking to his daughter's room.
"Very soon, Allah has said it, go know your wife Umm for now, oaf," suggested Muhammad with a smile, opening the door to Ayesha's room.


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Many years ago I bought and absorbed The Complete DX'er by W9KNI. If there one overriding lesson from that book was the importance of listening. Of course there was no global DX spotting network -- just pockets of friends who would let each other know when a rare one appeared on the band -- making listening, and lots of it, an absolute must for the DX enthusiast.
Although I had been around long enough by then to not learn much from the book it put what I was already doing into perspective , therefore enabling me to better understand the strategy of good listening. When I returned to air a few years ago after a long hiatus from ham radio I soon learned that too much listening could actually be detrimental. While I listened someone else spotted the rare one and those receiving alerts from the spotting networks got there first.
Since I was QRP at the time showing up late was often no better than not showing up at all. I updated and honed my pile up skills to overcome this handicap, and I seemed to do pretty well at it. However the value of listening is still there, if you understand how the game is now played. Listening is a way to catch the DX before the horde arrived, especially the majority who would only stir when there was a spot. The majority have, in effect, delegated the listening to others, including the skimmers.
The why of listening
There is of course the operating awards benefit of listening, that of getting there first and not having to contend with the pile ups. Modern pile ups are like the phenomenon of flash mobs, growing from nothing to a large crowd in a minute -- spotting networks are a kind of social media. Years ago it took time for the pile up to build since there was no instant communications to one and all about where the DX was located, or that a rare one was active.
That is not the only reason to listen. Listening is in itself a pleasure. When I was very young and first discovered the magic of short wave radio I liked to listen to signals coming in from all over. But I didn't have a receiver. Instead I would "borrow" the family 5-tube AM radio from the kitchen. I had learned that by unscrewing the slug in the local oscillator coil I could lift the coverage to well above the end of the broadcast band at 1,600 kHz.
There I heard AM broadcasters, commercial operations such as ship to shore and the odd pulsations of RTTY as heard through an AM detector. I also came across the rhythmic thumping of CW and the unintelligible squawk of SSB. That was how I first discovered the existence of amateur radio and hams. A ham license was still several years in the future.
After my listening sessions I would screw the slug back down, making sure to calibrate the dial to a local broadcast station, and return it to the kitchen. My parents were very tolerant of my burgeoning hobby. That is, as long as there was no harm to what was to them an expensive appliance.
My listening habit carried over after I was licensed. Some of that was out of necessity since I did not have much of a station: an 807 to a dipole 3 meters high. I enjoyed it immensely nonetheless. In a way I found more pleasure in discovering DX on the bands than calling and, sometimes, working it. As time went on my DXing, and then contesting, became more intense so that my listening had an objective: I was hunting more than listening.
Why do it now
I am happy to say that I have rediscovered some of that early magic. At times I find myself tuning the bands for no other reason than to hear what is out there, having no inclination to transmit at all. With the new Beverage antenna I can listen in on far more distant DX on 80 and 160 meters than before. Without a decent transmit antenna I cannot work them, so listening to them is all I can do for now.
With the return of the equinox comes propagation over the pole from south and southeast Asia. I enjoy tuning the bands from 40 meters on up to catch the openings and hear what I can hear. Often the signals are very weak and not easily workable. Either I don't have enough power or they are hearing others far more strongly than from this part of the world.
Of course I do sometimes come across some moderately rare DX, and that's all to the good. Just this morning I tuned across V85TL calling CQ on 20 meter CW and getting no callers at all. No one had yet spotted him. I worked him without much difficulty. Then I listened as his subsequent CQs went unanswered. The band was busy, with stations all around, yet none seemed to be listening. After a couple of minutes I spotted him and that drew in callers.
Modern times
I think it's a shame that too many hams nowadays don't listen. This is not about getting there first or sharing the burden of hunting down the DX and spotting it for others. What I find unfortunate is that too many seem to have lost the simple pleasure of tuning the bands and listening, and perhaps finding the unexpected. Not for awards or points but for the thing itself.
Do newer hams feel the magic of radio? Perhaps not in the same way, and that's a shame. Some of my own generation seem to have lost the magical feeling that drew them to amateur radio in the beginning, yet others I know still have it. There are hams I know who in their single-minded pursuit of DXCC Honor Roll will only stir to turn on the rig when a new one appears on the bands. That leaves me cold -- to me amateur radio is much more than that.
This is not to be critical of anyone or to make myself out to be a curmudgeon. Radio still has magic to it and I regret that some may have lost that feeling or perhaps have never had it. All I can do is shrug it off, feeling that they are overlooking something of value. I will keep listening.