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Now I know I've written about it before, so it will come as no surprise to any of you that I have a stat counter on this blog. Before you all gasp in middle class horror and nod knowingly to each other that you always knew that I was the type, I know a lot of you have them too. You do, there are ways you see of telling, not least because most of us can't resist putting the live feed box onto our blogs. Ha! Got you, so no more smirking at the back please and you can remove yourself from Judgement Corner before I do it myself with force and a threat of no pudding after tea (dessert after dinner to my American readers, I'm harsh but fair).
Anyway, as most of you know, this little stat counter can tell you all sorts of things, the most intriguing, and downright entertaining being the google search words that people put into the search engine and thereby find your blog. As I recounted in A Rose By Any Other Name many of these are downright inappropriate and excitingly pornographic, and again I can only extend my heart felt apologies to anyone coming to this blog (sorry) via such searches as housewife tied to stool with dog or housewife beating milkman with bamboo for the banality you are faced with (you are facing the computer aren't you? There's no panting sound track with this blog, yet another disappointment, I suppose I could record the dog after a run if this would help?).
The thing is, after a while you get a bit immune to these searches, even a little bored. There's only so many times you can snigger at sex-with-a-housewife requests before you begin to tune out and hum a little tune at the ordinariness of it all. Surely, surely someone can come up with something better? Something to brighten my day a little? Something a little more imaginative than plain old sex?
Well, they did. Today, just now in fact. And for reasons that will become clear, I am a little concerned. Scanning down the Google searches in a quiet moment at my laptop, looking for the pathways of readers (only out of interest you understand, although Nunhead Mum of One I notice you've been absent for a while, twenty lines please: I must read Millennium Housewife every week, everyone else, take note), there it stood, in italics:
I Shot Myself.
I shot myself? Who? What? The cliches are running out of my mouth before I can stop them (although this image may please some of the porn searchers out there). Who on earth thinks: oops I just shot myself, I'll just boot up the computer and check the symptoms on Google before calling an ambulance? It's obvious isn't it? I'm not mad am I? It is you not me isn't it? You don't need to google the symptoms, the diagnosis is right there in front of you. You shot yourself. Therefore you have a giant piece of pointy metal somewhere in your body. The clue as to where could be the great gaping hole spurting blood, the one that looks a little worse for wear. In fact if you're feeling a little dizzy, this may be another clue and I'd dial the hospital quite quickly.
What did they expect? Did google answer with a concise and neat link to selfdiagnosis.com? Or perhaps bring up a lesson in self bandaging and bullet removal? No. Of course it didn't, because Google would then be sued for allowing someone stupid enough to shoot themselves to find a website that stupidly advises on self-removal of a bullet in a stupid manner. And Google isn't stupid.
Instead, of course it sent them to me. So, err, sorry about that person-who-shot-themselves. Sorry if you've just read all the way down to this bit while bleeding, possibly to death, only to find I'm not going to advise you on bullet removal. I'm also sorry about the calling you stupid bit, especially if this is the last thing you ever read. I feel a bit bad about that. Still, if you survive, you could always sue Google for not providing you with the life saving website you were looking for, that might be fun. If you're still able to read at the moment try calling 999 if you live in the UK, or 911 in America, I'm afraid I don't know any other emergency numbers for other countries, even though I live in Europe. But that's a debate for another day.
So, as you can see, this is why I'm concerned, what happened to the person who shot themselves, no one that stupid could possibly survive could they? (again sorry if it's you and you're still reading, I'm presuming you're on the floor right now). And what about me? Was that the highlight of my google searches? Am I doomed forever more to dog and housewife couplings, never again to be enthralled, delighted and disturbed in equal measure at the horror of the story unfolding on my stat counter. I hope not. Poor me (and poor you if you're the shot-one, and well done for bothering to read the post, there's lots more if you care to scroll down).
January 18th: Saturday Sharefest
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Monday, July 25, 2011
Summer Fun
Again, very limited time today for blogging, but I offer up this little cartoon sent by a friend. It just about explains my feelings toward the excessive heat of late.
Have a great day!
Posted by Solameanie at 3:38 AM 1 comment: Links to this post
Labels: Excessive Heat, Joel Griffith, Solameanie
Thursday, July 21, 2011
Democrats and Memory Holes
I have been neglecting this blog horribly, with a comment from a prior post yet to be answered. But with more health care stuff going on in the family tomorrow, it may take a bit longer to get back to my normal routine.
I couldn't let this story pass without comment, though. I was yelling at the television earlier when I saw the Democratic talking heads out there trying to use Ronald Reagan in the current budget impasse. "Reagan was willing to compromise and raise taxes."
Thank God for Michael Reagan, who (in the linked article) reminds us that the Democrats in Reagan's day reneged on spending cuts they had promised when Reagan was forced into the tax increases. The spending cuts never happened. We ought to remember that and shout it from the housetops.
Because they'll do it again. Count on it.
Posted by Solameanie at 8:37 PM 1 comment: Links to this post
Labels: Joel Griffith, Michael Reagan, Ronald Reagan, Solameanie, Taxes
Friday, July 15, 2011
Control Screaming Kids?
Surely, you jest!
I had to chuckle grimly a bit over this little story. Apparently, a restaurant wants to ban the under-6 crowd from their establishment because older clientele complained about their "unruly" behavior.
I read with interest, because I've been greatly annoyed by trying to eat an expensive dinner in an upscale establishment, with a 5-year-old boy at the next table lying on the floor kicking and screaming, and his oblivious parents doing nothing about it. The article goes on to discuss the behavior of kids on airplanes, and the resultant furor.
But then, do parents dare do anything about their kids' tantrums in this Spockian statist day and age? These days, if a parent so much as says "boo" at their kid in a public place -- much less warm the brat's rear -- they get turned in to the child protection authorities and possibly arrested for abuse. Even though corporal punishment by parents is still legal in the U.S.
I'm not posting this to get into another knock down-drag out on the merits of corporal punishment. But I have to laugh at the complaints of society about bratty kids when society itself contributes to the problem by over-policing how parents correct their children.
Posted by Solameanie at 6:00 AM 6 comments: Links to this post
Labels: Discipline, Joel Griffith, Solameanie
Tuesday, July 12, 2011
Resting in God's Grace
Yes, folks . . . I'm still alive. And so is my mother, praise God.
It's been a pretty rough year, and things intensified beginning in February when Mom began developing heart trouble. Then skin cancer. And surgeries involving both. Tough, but God is faithful, as always, walking right through it with us.
Today, both Mom and I are feeling ill with a flu bug or something. In the midst of feeling miserable, Psalm 23 came to my mind, so I thought I'd post it today.
The LORD is my shepherd, I shall not want. He makes me lie down in green pastures; He leads me beside quiet waters. He restores my soul; He guides me in the paths of righteousness For His name's sake. Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I fear no evil, for You are with me; Your rod and Your staff, they comfort me. You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies; You have anointed my head with oil; My cup overflows. Surely goodness and lovingkindness will follow me all the days of my life, And I will dwell in the house of the LORD forever.
That's a wonderful promise for those who trust in Him. And I need Him today.
Posted by Solameanie at 10:34 AM 1 comment: Links to this post
Labels: Joel Griffith, Psalm 23, Solameanie, Trials
Monday, July 04, 2011
Happy Independence Day!
The Seventh Sola wishes everyone in the U.S. a very happy, blessed Independence Day. My hope is that we will all remember our history, and be thankful for the blessing of living in a free country. A freedom, by the way, that we are in great jeopardy of losing if we don't wake up.
My posting on The Seventh Sola has been much more sporadic than I would like, and this week will be no different. My mother is facing heart surgery, and at age 88, that is no light matter. I would appreciate everyone's prayers for her, and for our family. I probably won't be posting much this week, so I leave you in God's grace, and hope to be back here pontificating as usual very soon. There's a comment from an earlier meta that I haven't answered yet, but I will. Dungy, that's a promise. My apologies for neglecting you. My hands have been rather full of late!
Posted by Solameanie at 11:24 AM 4 comments: Links to this post
Labels: Independence Day, Joel Griffith, Solameanie
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The Saints released their first depth chart of the preseason August 4 ahead of their August 8 preseason opener against the Rams.
Though he received the majority of the carries last season, Pierre Thomas is listed as the third-string running back. Mark Ingram is the starter, with Khiry Robinson behind him.
Interestingly, the Saints do not list anyone at center. Matt Armstrong and Jonathan Goodwin are the only centers on the New Orleans roster.
The defense is headlined by new acquisition Jairus Byrd at free safety.
WR: Marques Colston | Nick Toon | Brandin Cooks | Brandon Coleman
LT: Terron Armstead | Bryce Harris | Tavon rooks
LG: Ben Grubbs | Senio Kelemete | Jason Weaver
C: none
RG: Jahri Evans | Marcel Jones | Manase Foketi
RT: Zach Strief | Thomas Welch | Ty Nsekhe
TE: Jimmy Graham | Benjamin Watson | Josh Hill | Nic Jacobs/Je'Ron Hamm
QB: Drew Brees | Luke McCown | Ryan Griffin | Logan Kilgore
FB: Erik Long | Austin Johnson
RB: Mark Ingram | Khiry Robinson | Pierre Thomas | Travaris Cadet/Derrick Strozier/Timothy Flanders
WR: Kenny Stills | Robert Meachem | Andy Tanner | Joseph Morgan/Seantavius Jones/Charles Hawkins
LDE: Akiem Hicks | Tyrunn Walker | George Uko
NT: Brodrick Bunkley | John Jenkins | Brandon Deaderick | Lawrence Vigil
RDE: Cameron Jordan | Glenn Foster | Rufus Johnson Jr.
OLB: Junior Galette | Keyunta Dawson | Victor Butler | Kasim Edebali
ILB: David Hawthorne | Kyle Knox | Todd Davis
ILB: Curtis Lofton | Ramon Humber | Kevin Reddick
OLB: Parys Haralson | Khairi Fortt | Ronald Powell | Chidera Uzo-Diribe
LCB: Keenan Lewis | Corey White | Trevin Wade | Rod Sweeting/Terrence Frederick
SS: Kenny Vaccaro | Marcus Ball | Vinnie Sunseri
FS: Jairus Byrd | Rafael Bush | Pierre Warren | Ty Zimmerman
RCB: Patrick Robinson | Champ Bailey | Stanley Jean Baptiste | Brian Dixon/Derrius Brooks
Special teams
K: Shayne Graham | Derek Dimke
LS: Justin Drescher
H: Luke McCown
PR: Travaris Cadet | Brandin Cooks | Charles Hawkins
KR: Travaris Cadet | Brandin Cooks | Charles Hawkins
KO: Thomas Morstead | Shayne Graham | Derek Dimke


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