text:
I write this now as my feelings have become too strong to ignore or suppress. Do not mistake that I am somehow confused over my feelings only deeply saddened. I am tormented by them. I lie awake at night reliving small moments of time with her. I wake ridden with anxiety over the possibility of not seeing her. I linger over pictures of her for periods of time that seem infinite. I am lost and in pain. My adult step-daughter has become a young woman with striking beauty, gentle grace, intelligence and all of the things I desire in one I wish to spend my life with. My thoughts are consumed by her and I am helplessly captivated by her smile, her words, her smell…her. Even as I write this, tears overwhelm me. I long to hold her and kiss her as I would the love of my life, as I am sure she is. We share more together than I can honestly admit to sharing with anyone else. Simply having her close to me fills me with warmth and I honestly bask in her sweet and gentle nature. I watch over and protect her as a parent should but the selfishness of my love for her consumes me and blurs my role. There are flickers of a passionate love in return but I can't bring myself to capture those moments. I recognize something different in her love for me; shy and nervous but a consuming knowledge that something else is between us. I hear in her words small hints of loneliness and longing. I see jealousy in her eyes when with her mother. I feel desperation in her hugs. Something about her manner towards me is destroying my sanity. I tread in dangerous waters as I admit to these feelings but I fear the thought of dying and never expressing my love or dancing with her again. I love her with all my heart and perhaps this forum will prove to be the only link to the feelings I have. Perhaps her search for her own answers will bring her to this passage.
148 thoughts on "Love for my step-daughter."
I live in a hell like this. I very dearly love my wife. I also love my step daughter very much. We just can't live that life. Maybe in a different life, on another planet it would be possible. Just not here. It hurts, but life hurts.
To hear this absolutely hurts. I was with by husband for over 13 years. And less than a year ago I found out him and my 20 year old daughter were having an affair for a year. The day I confronted them, they left together. Cashed out a 401K and left the state! My husband filed for divorce and they remained together, still do to this day. They devastated an entire family. My other daughter has attempted suicide twice because of what's happened. My son was committed to a mental hospital less than a month ago because of what happened. It left me in shambles I lost everything; my home my husband my daughter our money. All of his Family that I've known all these years got along with spent time with, have completely accepted this relationship and have ignored me all of our mutual friends chose his side I don't understand how people think this is OK the pain and the hurt and the turmoil they left behind. It's been almost a year and I still can't sleep, eat, concentrate. I cry daily. I'm sad, alone and physically hurt from the pain. They are both move Don I live in another state they have new jobs and we're just a distant memory.
You need many, many years of therapy.
My step daughter was seven when I came into her life, she was so shy she wouldn't even talk to her uncle's, I was dating her mom for 5 months before I met her and her older brother and of course she didn't speak to me either then one day she tripped me and jumped on top of me and after that she was my angel , she grew to be a beautiful intelligent pain in the ass lol , what I want to say is we have always had a special relationship . I am no longer married to her mom she decided to have affair. My wife was no longer welcome in our house and when she told my 24 yr old daughter she was going with her she responded , I'm not going anywhere Ray is my dad and this is my home I'm not going anywhere , we lived together for 2 years, I love her more than just a step daughter and she knows and she's married to a great guy lives far away but we talk all the time. You guys have to get a grip, that's your daughter
This sounds a lot like a woman's confession about her stepdad, Who described the jealousy and so on so similarly, But that might just be too big of a convidence, But who knows
I feel like people made this weirder and more complicated than it had to be. They're step family so there's no incest. She's an adult so it's not pedophilia. It sounds like you're in an unhappy enough relationship that you were able to develop strong feelings for another woman you were spending time with. The right thing to do is to leave your spouse. Allow her to move on and find someone who loves her. Afterwards, if it feels appropriate in the context of your relationship, talk to this other girl who used to be your step daughter. If the feelings are reciprocated and strong enough, at least you'll both be two single adults making a decision together.
My thoughts exactly.
I couldn't agree more, a kid I knew was a stepdaughter, then grew into
A beautiful 42 yr. old women (She's a single mom) and I'm divorced.
We speak via text or phone, distance makes it impossible too see one another
But it's been a good 10 yrs. since we've seen each other!
I agree with ya, if you both are of age and no harm will come to anyone
Let me qualify harm (Hurt feelings,what other people say) is NOT harm as in
Why should 0ne persons feelings take priority over another's eternal happiness?
If it's meant to be it will be!
Well the thing that makes this all unacceptable is that you are her step dad. I don't know how many years you have been raising her but she looks to you for guidance. That's what makes this wrong. You would be taking advantage of her because you are the one she has looked to and trusted to lead her in the right direction because of the role you play in her life. Leading her into a relationship with you is NOT the right direction. She sounds timid and you sound like that is a turn on for you. In light of your Step-father / step daughter relationship that is very disturbing. That is more a sign of power than it is of love. It seems you want to dominate her and her weakness is exciting to you. That is wrong. So very wrong. 7 years down the road, I really wonder how this turned out.
I feel like I am in the same situation my stepfather is acting very weird, especially since I've got a boyfriend, I completely disagree with it and do not feel the same towards him. Before I realised, I noticed something wrong with him and tried to communicate as it was affecting my mothers relationship with him but he didn't admit what it was, just said that it was because of me. All my family and boyfriend say he loves me. Never even thought this was possible :/ what to do? I actually hate him.
I am happy to report that we are still together. Some years have passed but we love each other. Had her mother over for Thanksgiving this year. (My ex— her mother). We are doing fine.
I was going to comment negatively but you are all consenting adults and your ex-wife has moved on from it. I know that socially it may be frowned upon but many appear to have forgotten about Woody Allen and others. It's so funny how we as a society like to take the moral high ground and selectively choose who to condemn.
The only thing I say is that; I am glad that in this time that we are on Earth, you have found happiness. Real love and happiness with somebody who loves you dearly. The worst thing anyone can experience in this world is not to ever experience happiness, or to love someone who doesn't love you back. I wish you both many years of happiness and joy. xxxx
I'm in a similar situation. It's difficult, Because you don't want to nor would want to do anything about it. At least that's what I feel in my situation, she's too young. I Only wish she was 10 years older so it would be ok to open up and hope for the best so to speak.
I really feel you, Reading your confession makes me think I wrote it myself.
You have a lot to say about your step daughter. She is however your child, your feeling for her is abnormal, it is a distorted passion not true love. Sir, real love is govern by right principals.
True love looks out for the best interests of all in your household. You read the other commenters and probably see what you feel is highly improper and selfish. Before you ruin some lives please consider this suggestion.
Take a long trip, get out of town, away from 'her', and think the matter over seriously. When you come back with a decision. I suggest you seek professional help if you still feel lovesick for your step-daughter and betrayal to your wife and family.
She is not a child if you are talking about me. I am now 70 and she is 35. We are together 24 hrs a day now.
so perhaps those who have condemned this man should avoid any sign of support for someone who acts upon these emotions….Woody Allen. Hypocrisy is the worst. I am not saying he is right or wrong for being attracted to a woman not of his blood. Just be consistent in your condemnation.
Dude, seriously, you need to get out! You`re delusional if you think that scenario is gonna work. Its all fantasy. Think that pussy is finer than her mothers, well its not. Reads like you`re obsessed and you`re talking yourself into thinking it`s okay to have relations with this woman when in reality you will be full of guilt and shame. Not worth it! Relish the fantasy and bone the mother like you`ve never boned her before, and stay away from your step daughter, she will only f*** up your life, not make it better.
I have posted about the same problem. People may not understand the pain this causes. They also may not understand that you don't fall in love on purpose. In not married to the the mother of my "step daughter" I didn't help raise her from a child I met her after she was grown up. She absolutely does flirt with me but only in joking she will never feel the same as I do. I hate myself for these feelings I know it is a betrayal of her love and her mother's love for me. I hate myself with more contempt than I have ever felt for any one. I don't kill myself only for the son my girlfriend and I have together. I love her mother too and the stress and soul destroying pain this causes is something no one can understand just from reading a post. I feel sorry for this man because I know how it feels. It is the lowest place to be. I know the internet will judge but some of you may undrstand this isn't some predatory thing. These feelings trap you in a living hell. You don't ask for this you don't want this you don't seem for it to happen. And there is nothing you can do and no one you can talk to. To have feelings you know you will never get to express and to want something so bad that you know you shouldn't want. Its easy to judge if you've never felt it. But I doubt this guy blames you he probably beats himself up more than you ever could I know I do it to myself.
I agree with the statement that we don't choose who we love, it chooses us. I too have fallen in love with my adult step daughter and struggle with the feelings everyday. Love is the strongest of all emotions and we are powerless to control who we feel love for, but we are in control of what we do with that love. I am no longer with my stepdaughters mother so I don't feel the guilt that another might feel but I clearly recognize that any attempt to convey my feelings will only cause grief and contention all around, that is the control over what we do that I mentioned before. I choose to harbor these feelings in silence than to cause anyone pain, loving my stepdaughter means respecting her and, though long divorced from her mother, I do not wish to hurt my ex-wife as well. I empathize with the men that have found themselves in this predicament. It is not illegal to love another adult, although it might be considered poor judgement to attempt to do anything about it, nor does it require therapy or is it 'sick' as long as the stepdaughter is not a minor or it hasn't become an uncomfortable obsession, which mine is not. I am in control of my actions on those occasions where I find myself around her, and I would never dis-respect her by making her feel uncomfortable or offended around me. Don't label us or condemn us, we have hearts that feel just like anyone else, I didn't ask for this nor did she ask to be the object of my affection. My feelings are genuine and I know I will suffer in silence, no more or less than falling for a married friend or a co-worker who does not return the feelings, I am not a stalker, I do not have a shrine to her secreted away someplace. I fell in love, its that simple, but unlike most, I am not able to tell her, so I don't and never will.
I spend more time with my beautiful adult stepdaughter and any other person in the world. As a single Man and her being a single mother I also spend more time with her children, my grandchildren than any other person.
It is normal not abnormal when you spend that much time around someone you eventually fall in love with them and with that goes a sexual relationship.
I am torn but at the same time excited about the thought of being with her. I don't know if she feels the same way because I have kept this inside of me and haven't talk to her about it.
There is no man in the world who loves her more, protects her more, help her financially more, takes care of her kids more or does anything more for her than I do. Since her divorce four years ago, I have seen so far about three of these jerks rollong in and out only for her beautiful DDD breasts.
I don't know what to do, but I feel it's right at some point in time to talk to her about it and move from my torment no matter which direction it goes in.
This is exactly what I am going through and exactly how I feel. Its a living hell. Nobody to turn to. Nowhere to hide. I love my wife. I just love her daughter more than I have ever loved anything. I wish there was some way out.
This is hardly unusual. Stepparents are not biologically related to their stepchildren so there is no incest taboo.
As long as you don't act on your attraction, you will be fine.
To all of the negative people out there. My SD is the wonderful and beautiful women. My SD and I get along better with each other then we do with our spouses. We plan our weekends so we can fit in time to see each other. We flirt with each other, hold hands, walk arm and are when we are alone. I love that woman. One day while we were giving each other a hug goodbye, the words slipped out. "You're perfect and I love you". She pulled back a bit, and told me that she loved me too. You could not imagine the relief that came over me when she gave me a kiss. We never took it any further than that but all of the pressure is off. We now know that we love each other, we pop each other on the butt, when we pass by and our hugs hello and goodbye mean a little more. I must say that it is so nice to hear I love you and get a kiss from her when we see each other!!!!!!!
I wish it were that way for me. I envy you. I love my girlfriends daughter so much. She is closer to my age than her mother is. She is in her 20s I in my 30s I get to spend time with her but she will never feel the same way for me. She says I love you as a daughter would her father. It melts my heart but I know it's not the same. You are lucky that you can be satisfied with the way it works for you two. I wish I could kiss the one I love just once.
Dear step Dad..don't ruin your life. The girl is not flirting with you. She is merely comfortable around do not creep her out with advances. I suggest therapy. You …need it.
She is not flirting nor was she ever flirting. It is a product of your imagination. The young woman is merely comfortable and trusts you. You should seek therapy or counseling. Ok….please do yourself a favor before you ruin your life and everyone regards you as a freak or weirdo…you've already opened your self up to the above two posters…just go get help.
Okay … I am now officially creeped out.
You are sick and in need of counseling. Your thoughts and behavior are completely inappropriate, and this is a traitorous route you are comtemplating. Of COURSE a young girl is beautiful, and now when she is a beautiful woman, you can't control yourself? Get over it, get to a doctor, get help before you ruin your life and the life of others.
I married my step daughters mother when sd was 23 and married. Over time and with great determination I have fought the urge to flirt back with her when she flirts with me. Now that she is in her mid 30's she has moved back in with her mother and I. Mother and I have not had an intimate relationship in almost 5 yrs, the flirting now is getting harder to ignore, she is a very sexy woman and she will flirt with me every chance she gets, even to the point of walking out of her room when I am getting ready for work in a robe that is partially open and I can see she has nothing on under neath it. I am really fighting the urge to take her up on what she is offering, it would sure be nice to hold a woman in my arms again and have real sex instead of masterbation all the time. what should I do????
I wish I were able to be in that situation. Mine will never love me in that way. You should talk to her see what she truly wants. And if you want it too then talk to her mother let her know what kind of hell it is to love some one you know you should not love and that you don't fall in love with some one on purpose that you didn't ask for it but that it is real and you should not live miserable your sole life to spare the feelings of her mom.
Don't worry that girl. Statistically the ratio of this happening is relatively low. Don't become a man hater because of a few bad apples.
I've been reading all of this to figure out how to deal with a step dad being attached to you (I'm pretty young). The only thing that I found here is good reasons why when I have children I should become a lesbian or just never date a guy again. >.> shiiiiiiit
One year anniversary is coming up July 18. We are getting along great. Still in love as we were to start with years ago. Some of these relationships can and will work out. Doing great.
So this weekend I found the courage to tell my ex-stepdaughter how I felt. She welcomed it news with open arms, and told me she knew already. She was wondering how come it took me so long to tell her. I explained myself and she said everything will be okay. She said she loves me even more for being honest with her and not trying anything with her when she was young and while I was married to her mother. She said we can work through this and not to worry as long as I do not act weird about it. Am happy I told her what a relief.
I am so happy for you :)
I too have extremely attarctive step daughters.20 and 25 , It's like living with the girls next door. One looks like Kendra and the other like Holly. BUT guess what?!
Control your urges. PERIOD! Never let up for an instant. Do not say or do anything dumb.
Keep your eyes on their eyes and don't look them over. NEVER say anyhthing inappropriate. Once you've mastered these tough skills…everything will become easier. Good thing for me they moved out.
I feel for the man, I too have these feeling that no one understands. But my feelings did not surface till recently.
I have been divorced from her mother for 14 years she was 15 now she is 29 and a very remarkable woman her inner beauty takes my breath away. My problem is I feel consumed by my feelings for her all of a sudden. She keeps flirting with me sexually and I try to ignore it, but it is very difficult. I have been by myself an my 2 kids for the last 14 years. I have not had any relationships to speak of and my stepdaughter knows this. She tells me that we have a special bond that no one can take away. I have never toucher in any way whats so ever except a hug or a peck on the cheek. She rubs her self on me and I am trying to ignore it. She also sits provocitively so that I see things I shouldn't. I am beside myself and afraid of what might happen between her and I. She has now been around for the last 2 years and still nothing has happened yet but I know it is about to, and I will except it and run with it. I love her so very much. Lost in love
look at it realistically. It's just an infatuation. She is young and beautiful and you are a man so you are naturally attracted to her beauty. BUT…she is your wifes daughter…your step daughter your role is as a Dad and Father…no more. Do not linger in the fantasy of making love to her. It will eat you up and consume you and destroy life as you know it.
It's tough…believe me I know. But controlling your demons and passions is a big part of overcoming you emotions.
It's all about control. Control yourself and distract yourself. STOP giving her the eye. THAT eye you feel she's giving you back is the illusion of what you feel for her. She looks up to you..like a daughter loves a Dad…do not ruin it. Ok?
I know only too well this story. I fell in love with my step-daughter long ago. I was 21, married to an older woman and her daughter tried so hard to reach out to her but she could not.
I know the pain. 15 years have passed us by and I still feel…so much pain.
There were times it seemed so blatant that she felt for me too. Times when she went out of her way to arouse me, tease me…seek comfort from me. Always though just a step out of reach. I could never be sure and it caused great distress. I could not in the end, continue that life of torment. The mother who was addicted and cold and the daughter who was so completely opposite and yet we all were damaged.
So many years ago. The wounds I still bare, wounds that will never heal. I love her, still. Only her do I love so completely. And I am damned for that love. She haunts me.
We spoke over e-mail for the last time after I had resettled. I told how much better my life was and how I was sorry, but I never could tell her…how much I love her. I ran so far away I could never be found and she did too. And we have never spoken again, and ….I fear if I saw her today, it would crush me. Crush me beneath the weight of guilt, of desire, of love and a what feels a thousand years of suffering.
There are some things that one can not run from. Love is one of them. We too, kept apart for some years. I was never able to get her out of my mind or heart. But the main thing is we are happy once in our life. I would change nothing.
I understand what he is going threw cause I'm in the same situation. I also have a stepdaughter and I'm deeply in love with her. We been having a sex relationship for about 2 yrs. I love her dearly. People will never understand cause they are not in our shoes. All I have to say is follow your heart. If she wants to stay with u go for it I don't see a problem. Good luck.
how old are you and how old is your stepdaughter? do you realize how many people will be HURT and how you will be hated if this gets found out? and it WILL get found out if you continue.
Shell, we are not hiding. There were a few that was upset at first.Who is this going to hurt? Some think that it is unusual with the age different. I am 65 in April and she is now 29. Her mother, (my ex) is living with us. Unusual? yes but unheard of. No there is no contact between her mother and me so don't even go there.
And there are those who says she is just there for the money. My reply to them is she has always been in my will. I am in a shape that no one HAS to work if they do not want to. But I keep reminding them that I will be gone someday.
You just might be suprised at who will except your relationship. We have had no one say a thing to us. I am 65 she is 30.
So I've come across this website from a Google search. I too am becoming a part of the predicament in which my feelings and desire for my step-daughter is deepening. I'm worried. It's not something that I can control and I don't know what to do about it. This apparently is something more common than I realized. I tell myself that it is not right and I know it is not okay. I realize how innocent and unfair to her it would be to pursue or act upon anything, but psychologically I cannot control the thoughts that fill my mind. I know that I would never touch or harm her in anyway. I just want the thoughts to stop and go away. I'm too scared to seek help for fear that I may be exposed and lose everything that I have. I do love her mother very much and we have a great relationship, however I have feelings towards her daughter that just aren't normal. After reading some of the comments here, those with such harsh words and blame are helping nothing and nobody. We cannot control what we think or feel. It is almost as instinctual as breathing and it comes down to how we act upon those feelings or ensuring that we DO NOT act upon any thoughts or feelings. I know that posting this leaves yet another subject for negative comments and objection, but for those who actually understand… you are not alone. I'm looking for any anonymous support groups in hopes that talking about this issue will help. Good luck to any other step-father with the same situation.
I hope you found what you are looking for.
If you need to talk…if any of you need to talk…reply to my post and I'll give an e-mail address. It is nice to know I'm not alone. I geuss misery loves company, eh?
it's ok to go to a psychotherapist for help. Go ahead. It will be a relief to tell someone.
Well, she is not a blood relative and is an adult, so it's not illegal or wrong.
However, she might not share the feeling. What I would do is sit down with her in a neutral location, and have an honest conversation. You can tell her the truth about your feelings, but it needs to be done without touching or lovey-dovey language that might make her uncomfortable. Then you ask her about her feelings, in a non-confrontational way. What you interpret as one thing may be quite another, and I'd hate for that to get confused.
If you are still married, you really need to resolve that relationship first. It's not healthy or fair to leave someone hanging.
If you love your family member and you think it's wrong than get a hobby and quit checking them out. If you want to pursue this relationship than look past the rules and express your thoughts. Just love.
I have a question to any of you who are in love with a family member… Do any of you have kind of um an incest fetish? I feel like I kind of do and I wish I had a step father I could love unconditionally even though it's taboo.
I do not see this as incest. There is no blood relation here.
I don't have any incest fetish and never in my wildest dream that I'm gonna fall in love with my stepfather. It just happens, love happens unexpectedly
That was amazing. I am in lve with my stepdad to hes 34 and im…. 14 yes its bad but you no what, if its love age doesnt have to mean a thing. My situition is harder though, my mom found out and went to the police. So its being a hard time for me right now I dont have the love of my life anymore I feel like my family hates me but wont say anything. If you feel like you really want to spend your whole life with her, tell her!
The ball is in your court dear. If you say nothing happen, then their hands are tied. Unless there is some evidence on tape or pictures, they only have your word on it. Just because you lived with him does not mean that anything happen between the two of you. Hang in there
Hi Indyracer57, just want to know how is it going for you and your stepdaughter. I hope everything is going well for you!
Thanks. It has been six months now that she moved in. Everything is going great. We have settled in with the kids (and her mother). Planning a week-end this week end for that special day in Feb. Agian thanks for asking.
Thanks for replying! Knowing that u guys are doing great is such a fresh air to me. My stepdad n I love each other but there's no way that we can be together without hurting people. It gives me some kind of hope for me, never know what could happen in the future :)
I'm looking forward to hear more from u, n just ignore what people say! It's your life and you should pursue your own happiness.
If you can wait until you are 18 then it won't be a problem. Right now it's a he said, she said, and they have no evidence without you. So try to reconcile your thoughts and live with them without acting until you are legal …
ever heard the saying " age is just a number. so is 999 pedo" yeh that applies to you!
you are a child. you don't know what love is. most adults don't even understand it.
you've got a simple crush. it's natural at your age.
it's probably best you aren't near him tho. it will only lead to a sick, twisted and awkward relationship. get over it!
You sound sweet. I love my step daughter but she is of consenting age. I am 11 years older than her and 13 younger than her mom. I've never felt more love for someone and she will never feel the same for me. As a result I have never felt more pain loneliness and depression. I don't want to offend you but at 14 you were too young. You may have been in love but it would not be right of him at his age to be sexual with you in any way. If he truly loved you he could have at the very least waited in till you are old enough. Your family doesn't hate you. Your mom called the police because she cared for your safety. I am sorry for your pain I know how it feels. I have a love I cannot ever express the pain is unbearable but you have your whole life ahead of you and I can promise you that you will find love again.
There is no such thing as love.
This is true. We only think and tell ourselves that we love somebody or something. We are purely born to live and survive… not love. Love is a matter of choice and thought, just as believing in god. Love is about as psychological as lust or sexual desire.
I am in love with my 24 year old ex step-daughter. I know it is wrong and a betrayal of her trust and have been trying to suppress these feelings but they are on my mind constantly. I am starting to believe that the love that I feel is a mixture of fatherly love and an addiction to oxytocin.
My ex wife has no real capacity to show affection and over the past few years my step-daughter and I have been filling the void left by this. I rub her feet and back and get a great deal of pleasure from this (emotional) not sexual.
The other night I was partying with a friend and my step-daughter skyped me and my friend saw her and was saying that she was hot. I got extremely ill rational and jealous. I thought I had ended the skype call and told my friend how I loved and am in love with my step-daughter as a woman. Well evidently I had ended the video part of the call but not the audio and my step-daughter and her husband over heard me.
Now I believe I may have destroyed my relationship with my step-daughter , her husband and my Grand daughter.
I can't stop crying and this is weighing so heavily on my mind. Can I ever get them back?
Only time will tell. Wait awhile then try to set down and talk to them about it.
Thank you, I feel like such a wanker.
And I thank you
Read the bible, you say? That's a great idea. Read the bit about Lot and his daughters. The part where Lot's daughters get him drunk and have their way with him so they can conceive and carry on the family. I can't stand these religious fanatics who believe the lie and tell others they need to pray. They are forcing their own will that way. Religion was invented by man to enslave his fellow man. The bible is a work of fiction. It is a very sexist book. Right from Adam and Eve the authors always blamed Women. How about Job's wife? and Lot's wife? and all the other parts in the bible where women were treated subservient to men. Makes me wonder how any woman can fall for the fallacy that is religion. I say that, and I am a man myself. I was fooled once by religion but I won't be fooled again, ever. Religion is the number one reason for all the misery and suffering of people throughout history and it never stops. There are many stories in the bible about rape, incest, slavery, torture and murder. And what did God say? Well, he said that Lot was a very righteous man. Then Lot offered up his own daughters to the evil men of Sodom so they wouldn't rape him. Yes, read the bible. Find out the truth about the big lie that religion is based upon. As for this "forbidden love" hey, as long as two consenting adults love each other, then more power to you. I wish I had what you have, Indyracer57. Please enjoy what you have. Don't listen to anyone they are just jealous and would do the same thing if given the chance.
I will pray for you.
That's because they are dummy. Don't get mad because God made a women from a mans rib and said this is women flesh of your flesh . She is mans helper. After all God never spoke to Eve. Women were made to keep men from being alone and nothing else sorry bout your luck. You have no power. If you do keep yourself from dying and going to Hell for rejection God and His word.
You got it all wrong. My husband is MY slave, not the other way around.
Perhaps it is the devil… However, I haven't seen mention from anyone who has lived or visited outside the US. You see this is quite common in other parts of the world ~ and much more. It seems as though those who are able to so deeply criticize are quite narrow minded and unaware.
We are human. Love is the most powerful emotions we possess. Through the dynamics of humanity, we have continued to exist. We are as diverse as there are leaves on a tree. Every man does what he believes is true & righteous in his heart. If he is incorrect in his beliefs, he will pay the price… no matter what the cost. Each situation is as unique as the individuals involved. The truth will be found…
My story: im in my middle 20s, i started living together with this woman that has a daughter, she is 35 years old, i have lived with them since 5 years ago, i met her doughter when she was 12 years old, she has been my step daughter since that time, now that she is 18, and also that she looks cute and has nice feelings, i feel confused with my feeling toward her, since some time ago i have felt that i love her as a woman and not as a daughter, we are really good friends and we can talk about anything including sex with no problem, sometimes i feel like she tease me, she touches me like teasing me, i know she feel something too but she scared of shiwing it or i dont know, i have dreamed of her lots of time, i dont want to sound like a pevert but i really like her as a woman. what should i do, i know i dont love her mom anymore and im still with her mom for just being nice and dont want to hurt her. please respond, thanks
I think u should get on your knees and pray everytime u get to having these feelings. That is nothing but the devil trying to tempt you. And if u do not want her mother you should leave. You may think of it as being nice but in reality you are stopping the mother from finding someone who does want to be with her. Also I think you should limit your contact with the daughter. You should also read KJV Bible if you don't already. Study Gods word and pray and you will overcome this situation.
The bible is as much of a distraction as watching TV or playing video games. It's a guidebook to how people should live their lives in good values. Not everyone can buy into that. Why do so many people think that is the solution to every problem?? I've been there & tried that personally, but only feel like it's a pathetic attempt to brainwash what a person truly feels inside. It's one thing to believe something yet uncontrollably feel another. Nobody can tell you what to do or make any decisions for you. I'm putting myself in the same predicament, only by the time my step-daughter is 18; I will have spent 14 years caring for, raising and loving her. I know how uncontrollable the desires can be. I also know how if feels to somewhat be lead on by comments and suggestions from her. However, I was 18 once and even as a male I was vulnerable and irrational in thinking I knew what I wanted. She may look up to you now and think she wants something more, but when she matures and really ages, she will regret making that decision as a mistake. You know deep down it is wrong, that is why you are asking and seeking approval here… she'll feel the same when she gets older and in turn will look back & realize that you as the adult should have been responsible and mature enough not to let anything wrong happen. Again, it's your choice and you can do what you want but realize what the consequences may be after the fact. What is the worst that can happen because it most likely will…
Yes I think she is hot. And she is 28, almost 29. Marry? Not for awhile yet because we want to make sure that it is right. Divorce should be final next April. We are doing fine in our relationship and have been living with each other and her two kids for some five months now. We have not had a real argument since we have been together. She has become a little disturb with me a few time but what do you expect, she is female.
if you truly sense all this deep crap in her voice that longs for you, why not try making a move and see what happens? It sounds like this is what you want right? just divorce your wife, and if you are so sure she wants you, then you two can get married, it's obviously worth it since you are tormented by the thought of never seeing her right? you're reduced to tears and all that? The fact that you're even thinking about her says to me that your relationship with your wife isn't good and if you are any kind of man you will divorce her immediately and spend the rest of your life with a super hot 18 year old girl…..oh please tell me she's hot..
I suggest you leave your family…because you could hurt your wife so deeply…and I'm sure your daughter doesn't feel the same way…How old is she? 15 or something??? Believe me I know how f***** up and akward it can be…I mean do you think god would agree with your choices…I hate my stepdad because I believe he feels the same way you do…in no way in hell do I like him like that…and It's just wrong!!!! Just back off please…Push aside your feelings and ask if that is right!!!
Your not and she agrees with everything I have posted here. There is not a day goes by that we do two thing together, laugh and say I love you.
eh. watch out. the power dynamic is unbalanced here.
just my honest opinion, if I were your stepdaughter I would be creeped out by reading this post.
You bring out some interesting points. But, you are wrong on a couple. I will never fall out of love for her. That has been one of the problems, I never have. I will Never cheat on her because I care to much for her. I believe that there is still tension between her, her mother and myself. But again, Her mother knows how we feel for each other and says that we should be together. We have not had one disagreement since she moved back in. Oh yes she has gotten disturbed with me but I was 100% my fault. We work together on projects. It does not take money to make us happy together. For the people we know, we are very open about our relationship. Some approve, some don't. Other people does not come between us.
I am eighteen and becoming aware of the world of romance. My father warned me that men would be attracted to me because of my looks, my age… And that some men would cheat. That men are not the most devoted of creatures. Men cannot be monogamous.
I didn't want to believe him, because I believe human beings are basically good, but little by little, I have been realizing the truth of his words. You fell in love with a woman, married her, then became attracted to her daughter (who is probably much younger than you, pretty and interesting because of her age). If I were her, I would be thinking only of the pain my mother must be going through- of seeing her husband fall for her daughter. I would also lose hope for my own future. How am I to ever find true love, if the man I choose will eventually pine after somebody younger? Somebody more innocent and believing?
You sound very romantic. I believe you when you say you are in love. But you will fall in love with somebody else, then another, and another. Men are such fickle creatures. I have lost all hope of finding unending love, because of these types of situations.
You are a human being. Control your emotions and leave your wife. You are in an impossible situation. Yes, one life to live and no regrets- but living life to its fullest does not entitle you to ruin other lives. I believe women can fall truly in love, but men live only under a temporary illusion.
I will never marry.
Sorry for the long post.
(By the way- I love your writing style. You sound just like Humbert Humbert from Lolita- no offence, of course. I just mean to say you write with the same passion as Nabokov).
You are right. The pain it brings others is real. I didn't ask to fall in love with my girlfriends daughter. For years I cared for her as a friend. She is younger than me by 11 years. I am not attracted to her for her age. I messed up with her early in telling her I thought she was beautiful. I think she knows I'm in love with her. She is wonderful to still give me time and do things with me but I know she will never love me in the same way. I may have hurt her I hate myself for that. She deserves the very best knowing I have betrayed her mother and her by falling in love is the worst thing on earth. Every one falls in love but in till you fall for someone you know you shouldn't love in that way You will never understand the kind of hell we live in. I would not tell her unless I knew she felt the same but I know she had figured it out. I don't think she will ever forgive me for real but she is wonderful enough to try and spend time with me to make me happy. In part that is why I love her so much. She is so wonderful I hope her life brings her happiness. I wish I were not jealous of people she shows interest in. I know I'm wrong for feeling that way. As I said you don't chose who you fall in love with and when you know you can't share it it hurts I'm rambling I wish you the best in life. It is good to know some people out there are happy. I never will be.
Well said .
she hates me. she has left. i am now totally alone. don't feel like going on. guess i'll just have to wait on death. i'm sorry to her and angry and hurt and i just don't care about anything any longer.
I'm glad to learn that some stories of the kind, like yours, may have a happy ending. I can understand you so well as the so called stepdad curse has stricken me too. I was fool enough to tell my SD what I felt for her, but she didn´t accept it and told it to a lot of people – my wife, her boyfriend, a nephew of mine and some other family members included. She began to avoid me, treating me like dung whenever she could and was considering moving away. I was nearly destroyed by all that, but had my vengeance: as I was spying on her MSN, mail and Skype, I had lots to tell and show her BF and a lot of family members about the big slut she was, going out with a different guy everytime she had the chance. That was one of the reasons I came to wish her so bad in the first place, I knew she was making sex to dozens of guys she'd never seen before, why not to me who worked hard to buy her everything she wished besides food and home ? Her BF eventually left her and most of the family is now against her, aware that she too was to blame for all of what happened. In short, our lives have been shattered forever.
uh so you're saying you ruined your step daughter's life because she was freaked out that her older "father" wanted her sexually?
way to go, you're sick.
I know, it can be painful but there is only one thing you can do at this time. Be there for her and just maybe you will get her back. I too went though this and I was there at the right time. There was a time that I refused to even contact her because of my feelings. Those were the longest 13 years I have ever spent. My problem was I could not get her out of my head while I was in other relationships. We are still hanging in there and so far, we are happy together.
Best of luck to you
I'm very happy for you. My stepfather and I are so in love with each other. No guy ever made me feel the way he makes me feel. We're best friend for each other. The problem is he's still married with my mother. My mother never makes him happy, she's very selfish and never understand him. I don't understand at all why she would treat him like crap when he's like the most amazing person I've ever met. We became more intimate about a year ago. Last week we decided to stop this relationship, cause we think my mom's being suspicious. She doesn't deserve the pain if she finds out whats going on between us. It hurts me really bad knowing that I cant be with the man I love. I can't even be close to him anymore, cause my mom told her family about how it looks like I love my stepdad than my own mother, so it makes me look bad. No one in the worl dwould understand what I feel, I'd give up anything if I could be with him without hurting anyone, but I know it's impossible. I cry everynight and can't stop thinking about him. THe hardest part is I still see him a lot, it's not like I can try to avoid him.
Knowing that you're happily living together with your stepdaughter brings a smile to my face. I wish I could have the life that you have right now :)
I wish all the best for you two!
I am very happy for you Indy. My step-daughter & I fell in love about a year ago but she left me when I suggested we move in together about 3 months ago. She's now dating another guy and keeps saying to me I'm her best friend, we may get back together, she holds my hand with every chance she gets but it's so hard watching her go out with him. I'm tearing up inside and I don't know how much longer I can deal with this pain.
I sincerely congratulate you and wish you all the best for the future
uh sorry but she is now living with me and we are getting along great. Love to spend every minute of the day and night together. Making plans for the future together even marriage when the time comes.
I have to say I am very concerned for you ex and your stepkids/grandkids. I am truly a very openminded person, but this gives me the creeps.
you can love her without bein like that think of her not urself because she is ur daughter in life an u will regert that u done this so injoy her as ur lil daughter not the way u are know but i would knock it of.
Well she has been here for six days now and everything is going great. We are working together on the house that my x left a mess in. It is great to have someone that will work with you instead of working against you all the time. Everyday is just like the first, even with two kids to get under foot.
bet you any money…. if one of the kids is a girl that when she gets into her teens you'll be lusting after her too. get a life grampa
I'm a radio journalist with triple j (www.triplej.net.au) and I'm putting together a piece on family secrets.
I think this is a really interesting topic, and certainly there's a lot of ethical grey area but I'm not about judging people.
If you're interested in contributing to the show (anonymously) I'd love to hear from you: firstname.lastname@example.com
Best wishes,
well it is realy scary how this cases have ben goin more and more unfortunaly is the result of uor father and grandfather bac in 60-80 the ravolution realy have not idea the efect there are hapening now and realy it is hare to judge you dut becouse like you say youall both adult and can take of youself if u let me with all my respect will like to tall you to look after god he will not judge you open you hart to hem and this ladie you relation bouth togeter and god will give you the best uwnser kep going after all you are not with her mom and you relation star after you split of her right? we all have a dark side in and sometimes peaple only see they side like some one above wish you the best in life but remember don't forget !!!!GOD JESUSCHRIST!!!!!!HE THE THAT CAN BRING PACE TO YOU 2 LIFE
I can tell you I do understand. We are really in love with each other. Love that most people will never have. We are best friends and know each other inside and out. Like I said, if you choose to further the relationship it can be hard. But you can not let what other people think or say about the relationship. I wish you the best in the future.
I bet you're really ugly, even her kids
I bet your are ugly. Why would you say someting like that unless you have no life and have nothing left to do? Btw time is getting closer, six more days and she is moving in with me. She is the true love of my life and I hers. Most people have excepted the fact that we are going to be together, not matter what.
can't wait for in 30 days time when she leaves you for a younger, good looking guy who doesn't smell of old cabbage.
Everyone is getting on him like he should know better. I dont agree but she is not 18 years old or right outta high school. She is 35. An adult.
This is so sweet. I am also in love with my stepfather. We became very intimate with each other about a year ago. It's not just a sexual attraction, but we understand each other very well and we're best friends for each other. But we both know this relationship won't go anywhere, instead we see our relationship as special,even though not as lovers but we promise we're gonna be in each other's life forever.
This almost seems like my own situation with my step daughter. There is no sexual attraction. I'm glad because that might make it all very strange. Still, I have gorwn to love her deeply. Maybe more than anyone else I have ever known. I can't imagine not being a part of her life or her not being apart of mine. We have a special connection that almost can't be described.
Sorry to bust you bubble again but we have been in therapy for a couple of weeks. They are all for the move not only for her but for her kids. See she has two children ages 7 and 9. The girl who is 9 can't wait to get down here.
Yes we plan on continuing therapy because of some of the problems the kids has to deal with.
Okay Einstein/IndieRacer.. Why don't try couples therapy and see how that goes.
If you care so much about your stepdaughter, why not try that? You"ll soon find out how "healthy" your relationship is.
Well make that another step Father and Step daughter in love with each other. We are moving in together by Aug 1st we hope.
ewwwwm that's so wrong.. i hope you know that this isn't going to last unless she is really stupid. if she was an intelligent woman, it wouldn't have gone this far.
i pray to God that you don't have children together.. how do you think they're going to feel, knowing your history..
i'm guessing that your girlfriend/daughter has sexual abuse issues in her past and that you are a sociopath, narcissist or both. you were in a position of power and control over your daughter and you took advantage of both her and her mother and any other family members that may be involved.. how about their mother/daughter relationship?? in my opinion, you should be arrested, your in incest-or!
you are wrong on most bases. We have always been very close relationship. You say girlfriend/father. No it is step daughter, not a real daughter even though we had that kind of relationship. We were seperated for some 13 years and we have decided it is time show each other our real love. Her mother (my x ) has seen how we love each other and has not one problem with it. Most family members knows how we fell and is excepting it.
Why must most people put sexual abuse in every relationship or problem? There has been no sexaul abuse. Bad relationships? Yes for both of us and it is time to stop and now smell the roses.
look up incest on wiki, dumbh*t.. it's called intrafamilal abuse and it's the most common kind.. even between "steps" be a man and get the poor girl some help, you are so beyond being effed up, you don't even know it..
not to mention completely illiterate.. i shouldn't even be surprised that you're shacking up with your stepdaughter..
ha yes we must always bring abuse into it. This is not my step daughter, it is my x step daughter so no incest. Besides, how do you "abuse" someone that is 28 years old and has her on mind and feelings? I bet you are one of those spell checkers also.
Okay. You really have no right to go about judging someone you don't know. Grow up. People don't get on this site just to have some idiot like you insult them and their situation.
I fell in love with my girlfriends daughter at 23 years old. I didn't help raise her and I have no position of authority. I have so much love for her that I would die to prevent pain or sadness ever be falling her. She doesn't feel the same and I know I have no right. But you don't chose who you fall in love with and no one has any right to assume they know the situation so well. I am in the deepest hell I can ever imagine she is the only light in that darkness. I will always be here for her and I will always love her. These two are in love. They are not biological father and daughter they are consenting adults that know how they feel. If their relationship fails it will be no different than any other couple who didn't make it. I wish them the best. They are lucky to find the one they love and be able to express it and feel it. I have to swallow my feelings and I have to hide the most horendous pain I have ever felt in my life. I hope you never have to feel this way. I would kill myself if it weren't for my son whom I love very much. He is the only reason I still breath. I wish people wouldn't judge. Emotions are so hard to navigate and so painful. People in pain get to bare their souls on here this is a wonderful website this is the only place I could vent my pain. Sorry for rambling. I hope all of you even the doubters out there can live a happy wonderful life. I envy you all
OMFG!!!thats so sweeet,sensitive,and loving… *sniffles* and im emo
Your supposed to be in love with the woman you married. This is probably your punishment for not marrying for love. Probably married her just for sex.
I love my girlfriend she makes me happy I never asked or searched or worked for falling in love with my girlfriends daughter. It happens against your best judgement. It hurts being torn between your feelings and living some one you can never so much as hold hands with is the lowest feeling on earth. I don't love either of them for sex. I love my girlfriends daughter for the sweetness the wonderful feeling in my soul. The happiness she brings every time I get to be near her. I lament at the betrayal that it brings to both of them. I didn't want to fall in love. I didn't ask for it and the pain is unbearable.
omg thats sooo sweet i had that problem once… now im feel realy heavy in my heart.
If you were not in a relationship with her mother I would tell you to go for it. Age difference isn't important if you really love someone.
However you need to look at your current relationship instead of wishing for a new one. If you were truly happy with your wife, you wouldn't be looking elsewhere. Is it possible your step daughter represents all the good things which attracted you to your wife? She is probably a lot like your wife, just younger and gentler.
Sort out your marriage first.
Good luck x
I truly feel for you from the bottom of my heart.
I am a step daughter and i'm in love with my step father.
I never knew my biological father as he died before i was born. My mother remarried when i was 9 and over time, i got really close to my step father. Emotionally.
We were, and are best of friends and are able to share anything and everything with each other. We also have similar interests which means we genuinely enjoy each other's company.
However, just before christmas last year, we became more intimate and slowly engaged into a sexual relationship. He confessed that he might be in love with me romantically.
Now i'm a girl that does not believe in love and the illusion it creates but without me even knowing, i fell in love with him too.
My mother has always been a very jealous woman so she tried everything in her power to sabotage me and my step father's relationship. She did not know what was going on between us of course.
She… well, succeeded and my step father no longer loves me and is becoming more and more distant.
There's nothing i can do about it but like you, lie in bed every night dwelling on the past and asking myself what could of happened. perhaps in another universe we'd be together.
Sadly the reality is that he still loves my mother, too much to realise her mind games and malice. I on the other hand am suffering more than anyone can imagine.
So i'm asking you to look in your heart and ask yourself if it is worth the risk. I risked my family, my step father's reputation and eventually my relationship with him for those memorable days i spent with him when we were in love. I'd do it all again even though i have to endure this pain i have possibly for the rest of my life.
Just be careful, love is about making your step daughter happy. If she is, i'm sure you can sacrifice your urge and desire for her happiness.
I too am in a similar situation. I believe that against all logic and reason that I have also fallen in love with my step daughter. I am not with her mother anymore but she is so much younger than I. I realize there is no way she feels the same. Like you and your step dad, we are the best of friends and are able to share anything with one another. Despite the age difference I have never known any woman like I know her and the pain this causes me is very real. I can't expect her know how special what we have is and what it could lead to. She would just have to learn that in her own time and most likely with someone else. My secret desire will never be worth the risk of destroying the bond and true love we share as a dad and his daughter. Thats not a bad thing to have. The rest I must leave alone. At least you were able to have that kind of love for a time. I say treasure it no matter how much pain the memory brings.
I'm so sorry to hear that it ended so badly. I will always love my step daughter. She is truly the light of my life but she will never love me in the way that I love her. The pain of loving this woman and never being able to express it will kill me some day. I envy you that you had that chance. Live is such a terrible destructive thing. My heart goes out to you but be happy you were able to be together
being a father figure comes with a lot of love. you may just be confused on what type of love that is. it may not be real love. i love my father very much but not in that way. hell im a pre teen and i cuddle with him on stormy nights but do not get confused on real love and a fatherly love
I too am a stepfather who loves his stepdaughter very much but the thing is I'm not sure if it's not just the natural love a man should have for a daughter anyway.
I always look forward to seeing her and feel great inside when I do. These feelings didn't just happen overnight. It's not lust and I'm not a pervert. Have to say I'm a bit confused as to why I feel this way but what the hell it stays locked up.
We are both very mature people.
Never will I approach her with my feelings. I respect her far too much to do that.
I fully understand how that man feels and feel sure from the way he compiled his letter he has the intelligence to keep it under his hat.
I have a loving wife, son and a good family life.
I feel exactly the same way. I pray it goes away..I've come to realize I am in love with her..I will never tell her.
i can respect that you dont make a move on her but this man may be psychotic with the way he writes his letter like he's star struck in a completely unacceptable way. he may think she loves him and try to make a move on her. he'll say she loves him but the poor girl will get raped. if i knew this man i'd call the police immediatly
I do not think he ever intended for it to happen. Or that he ever really knew he would marry her Mother. Now think about this, If he had met her on the street and grew to feel the same way would that be wrong? People have feelings for people that they can not control. I fell in love with my step father before he became my step father. My mother met him through the same person I did and she fell for him. The only problem was that I never expressed my feelings for him. He then fell in love with my mother, and my thoughts on that are because we are very much alike but still VERY different. To this day I still love him. Him and my mother fight and he admitted to me that he wishes he expressed his feelings for me before asking my mother on a date.
to the person who wrote this you are a great writing, im not even gonna judge u cause u words were sooo moving- im writing a novel about something simialr to ur situation and i wann use bites of your passage
Please, get an editor if you ever decide to publish.
PLEASE, PLEASE get a good editor if you decide to pursue a career in writing.
I'm 22 years old and my stepfather started making comments to me a couple years ago about the way I look, and who I am, and whatnot. At first, I tried to just say thank you or brush him off. I think he may have gotten the wrong idea at this point, but it got worse and more provocative. I eventually just ignored him and he went away, angry, but I haven't heard from him in months. I don't live anywhere near him and my mother but I elected not to tell my mom about it, to avoid conflict. A few months ago, I found out the my mother had known about this all along – she knew he'd been IMing and texting me, and she never even approached me about it – AND she didn't consider leaving. This whole thing has destroyed our relationship. I no longer respect my mother or my stepfather, and I feel estranged from my youngest brother because I want nothing to do with them; I think they're disgusting. What you need to do is get help. I can pretty much assure you she is not interested and you will only hurt her and her mother, and probably cause a problem with THEIR relationship if you act on these feelings. It is unhealthy and unnatural. I'm not judging you, I just think you should seek help before you act on something that will not make her feel loved, but trapped and hurt.
That's one of the most truly romantically tragic stories I have ever read. I don't see anything wrong with what has happened to you. But it must be kept locked away forever. You have the kind of love for her that one could never develop for anyone else by meeting and dating tomorrow. If only every one of us could experience that kind of bond with someone before it becomes a romantic and then true companionship. We just don't do it that way in our society. Go with the bittersweet memories. You must find a way to be content with only the thoughts of what IS and not what can never be. You have her heart and she has yours in almost every way but one. That's not so bad. You must be content with that. Cherish it. If you need to … fantasize about the rest. While your years and wisdom may tell you that the kind of bond you share with this younger woman would give fruit to something truly special and lasting between you both, you have to realize that she does not have the same life experience, nor could ever understand it the same way you do. And even you can't be sure about that. So you must let it go. I believe that in a perfect world where two people could make it work, it would truly be the best kind of love both physical and emotional we all only wish for in our dreams. The chemistry and intimacy would be epic. I feel for you. But take and accept the next best thing in your love. That's having a loving step daughter.
Hey, Woody Allen got away with it. Best of luck.
i wouldnt do it, your lusting for her more then the loving
thank-you for your honesty this is really a place were we should not judge or be judged ^ .. it would be natural to have a attraction to your partners daughter she well is half of your partners gens ,, in saying this , what ever you do i recommend you never act upon it . you are her father no mater what . do not mistake her loneliness as a opening to intimacy between you two . you have to be the adult here and put your feelings of sexuality about her aside . for every ones sake .
YOUR HER "FATHER" KNOCK IT OFF!!!! Get a hobby, get something…. Friggin men that pull this krap really tick me off! I've been on the recieving end of this "love" and trust me when push comes to shove ITS NOT LOVE! She's your child and its doesnt matter her age… SHE"S YOUR CHILD! If only more "mothers" would pay attention NONE of these "feelings" would happen! now Im annoyed! I hate when I see these kind of postings… being a woman of this kinda life as a child.. sucked LARGE.. think of HER feelings for once! and how this is going to affect her.. because trust me IT WILL!
I suggest you keep your opinions that can offend people to yourself.
This site is to not judge others, It's why this site was made for people to confess and speak the truth.
Respect that and get over it.
Don't judge the man,
You wouldn't want to be judged for your confession.
I suggest you respect and know that this man is aware that it is wrong and he struggles through it.
I could never see what he means for falling for my step dad or mom
but it doesn't make it right to go off and tell him what love is.
He's a grown man, and he confessed this.
I disagree. If you don't want to hear peoples opinions then you may as well write your confessions in a diary and keep them to yourself. That's why this site is anonymous. Only God can judge you but I would want to hear readers opinions on my confession. Some people need to hear how rediculous they are but don't want to hear it from people they have to see.
I completely agree. I wrote my own confession. Alot of people were very angry with me, and it hurt what people said but I still read it, some people (the people that were kind and understanding) helped me get through it, and made me feel not like an animal, like a person with feelings, and mistakes (stupid nonetheless) happen.
I agree with the above – the poster needs to knock off this silly behavior – it's asking for trouble.
I agree. You should watch Opera's episode on Pedophiles. Honestly. They think they're in love with their victims as well.
The best thing for you to do is to f*** off and get out of their lives. Divorce the mother, and move far enough away that you will never see that poor girl again. NO she is not jealous, and NO you cannot have a relationship with her and it's disgusting that you're having these thoughts much less considerations. Go talk to a professional. You have issues.
Better re-read the letter. He said he adult step daughter. How is he a Pedophiles?? It has nothing to do with children.
it is incest which is just as bad. imagine if she was still a child and this nutcase loved her. imagine if it was your daughter would you be okay with it?
I agree. It is completely gross and ew. Having emotions heightened to the point where you would do anything for them and talk like your star struck in a completely un logical situation is psychotic behavior. I think he really needs to see somebody for this. Divorce your wife and move very very far away and for this poor girl's sake isolate yourself away from her.
marie it actually depends on the person and what you go through i am only 16 and same as you the stepdad love thing has happenedbut this started as soon as i started to develope and as time goes on i realized i love him and theres no other man for me, and he loves me as well but for you you could of not liked the attentin as many don't and to the writer unless she tells you try to hold back the urges to be with her because she could just be confused
Better hold back until you are 18. At 16, being a step daughter you are still illegal for him.
that is just gross honestly if you are a kid. growing up with a person who is your father or father figure and loving them is gross. loving a person who is older than you is a very different situation but this man nurtured you and took care of you. loving a man who is older than you is very different but a guy who raised you. my dad was 14 years older than my mom but he didnt know her until she was grown up and this is just gross. and what if she doesnt feel the same way and he makes a move on her and she cant stop him?! THIS IS GROSS AND INCESTUOUS
I am so distugsted by this man, the shy, nervous habits are going to be the fear she has of a man that speaks and writes like a weirdo. Shes not jealous of her mom, shes terrified that her mom is married to a guy that makes her uncomfortable as f***! like why the hell does this guy think the affection is reciprocated??? Like NO!
I think it stated how he believes she feels. It seems to be reciprocated. By the way if it is something that deep I believe it could be love. It is not like he prayed to God that he would find a Love in someone who would never be able to express anything of the sort. Think before you judge, and in reality you shouldn't be judging or casting the first stone. You are not perfect. Do not pretend to be.


text:
Design from Austria at the Milan Furniture Fair
The Salone Internazionale del Mobile is known as the world's most important furniture fair and attracts around 400,000 visitors. Austria has been represented in Milan with its own exhibition of design since 2010, which has brought in around 20,000 visitors for each exhibition.
With almost 70 exhibitors, Austria's contribution to this year's furniture fair is more comprehensive and exciting than ever before. Austrian design will be on display right in the heart of Milan's design quarter Brera at the renowned location of La Pelota, with a six-day exhibition entitled AUSTRIAN DESIGN PIONEERS .
The show has been designed by Vienna architects Vasku & Klug . They were also responsible for the concept of last year's Austrian exhibition, "Confession of Design", which recently won the prestigious iF Design Gold Award.
AUSTRIAN DESIGN PIONEERS will give a contemporary insight into the innovations and influences on Austria's creative scene and the design sector – providing a basis for the pioneering Austrian achievements of the future.
Related downloads
- Index of exhibitors [pdf, 1,645.1 kb]

subset: commoncrawl


text:
- What Is Depression?
- Is Depression Important?
- What Are the Signs of Depression?
- What Causes Depression?
- Treatment for Depression
- The Bottom Line
What Is Depression?
Depression is a mood disorder. It is more than sadness or grief. Depression is sadness or grief that is more intense and lasts longer than it should. It has various causes:
- events in your daily life
- chemical changes in the brain
- a side effect of medications
- several physical disorders
About 5% to 10% of the general population gets depressed. However, rates of depression in people with HIV are as high as 60%. Women with HIV are twice as likely as men to be depressed.
Being depressed is not a sign of weakness. It doesn't mean you're going crazy. You cannot "just get over it." Don't expect to be depressed because you are dealing with HIV. And don't think that you have to be depressed because you have HIV.
Is Depression Important?
Depression can lead people not stay engaged in their care, to miss appointments or doses of their medications. It can increase high-risk behaviors that transmit HIV infection to others. Overall, depression can make HIV disease progress faster. It also interferes with your ability to enjoy life. A study in 2012 showed that patients with depression, especially women, were more likely to stop receiving care and to not achieve undetectable viral load.
Depression often gets overlooked. Also, many HIV specialists have not been adequately trained to recognize or treat depression. Depression can also be mistaken for signs of advancing HIV.
What Are the Signs of Depression?
Symptoms of depression vary from person to person. Most health care providers suspect depression if patients report feeling blue or having very little interest in daily activities. If these feelings go on for two weeks or longer, and the patient also has some of the following symptoms, they are probably depressed:
- Fatigue or feeling slow and sluggish
- Problems concentrating
- Low sex drive
- Problems sleeping; waking very early or excessive sleeping
- Feeling guilty, worthless, or hopeless
- Decreased appetite or weight loss
- Overeating
What Causes Depression?
There are many causes of depression. Having the diagnosis of a chronic disease, like HIV infection or AIDS, can make depressive symptoms worse. Some medications used to treat HIV can cause or worsen depression, especially efavirenz (Sustiva). Diseases such as anemia or diabetes can cause symptoms that look like depression. So can drug use, or low levels of testosterone, vitamin B6, or vitamin B12.
People who are infected with both HIV and hepatitis B or C (see Fact Sheet 506) are more likely to be depressed, especially if they are being treated with interferon. Other risk factors include:
- Being female
- Having a personal or family history of mental illness, alcohol and substance abuse
- Not having enough social support
- Not telling others you are HIV-positive
- Treatment failure (HIV or other)
Treatment for Depression
Depression can be treated with lifestyle changes, alternative therapies, and/or with medications. Many medications and therapies for depression can interfere with your HIV treatment. Your health care provider can help you select the therapy or combination of therapies most appropriate for you. Do not try to self-medicate with alcohol or recreational drugs, as these can increase depression and create additional problems.
Lifestyle changes can improve depression for some people. These include:
- Regular exercise
- Increased exposure to sunlight
- Stress management
- Counseling
- Improved sleep habits
Alternative Therapies
Some people get good results from massage, acupuncture, or exercise. St. John's wort is claimed to treat depression. However, St. John's wort was shown to be ineffective in treating depression and it interferes with some HIV medications. Fact Sheet 729 has more about St. John's wort. Be sure to tell your health care provider if you are taking St. John's wort.
Valerian or melatonin may help improve your sleep. Supplements of vitamins B6 or B12 can help if you have low levels of these vitamins.
Some people with depression respond best to medications. Antidepressants can interact with some ARVs. They must be used under the supervision of a health care provider who is familiar with your HIV treatment. Protease inhibitors have many interactions with antidepressants.
The most common antidepressants used are Selective Serotonin Reuptake Inhibitors, called SSRIs. They can cause loss of sexual desire and function, lack of appetite, headache, insomnia, fatigue, upset stomach, diarrhea, and restlessness or anxiety.
The tricyclics antidepressants have more side effects than the SSRIs. They can also cause sedation, constipation, and erratic heart beat.
Some health care providers also use psychostimulants, the drugs used to treat attention deficit disorder.
A recent study showed that treatment with dehydroepiandrosterone (DHEA) can reduce depression in some HIV patients.
The Bottom Line
Depression is a very common condition for people with HIV. Untreated depression can cause you to miss medication doses and lower your quality of life.
Depression is a "whole body" issue that can interfere with your physical health, thinking, feeling, and behavior.
The earlier you contact your health care provider, the sooner you can both plan an appropriate strategy for dealing with this very real health issue.


text:
"What Is Tolerance?" New Era, March 2011, 2–4
The Message
What Is Tolerance?
From an April 1994 general conference address.
Tolerance is a virtue much needed in our turbulent world. But we must recognize that there is a difference between tolerance and tolerate. Your gracious tolerance for an individual does not grant him or her license to do wrong, nor does your tolerance obligate you to tolerate his or her misdeed. That distinction is fundamental to an understanding of this vital virtue.
Two Great Commandments
Our highest priorities in life are to love God and to love our neighbors.1 That broadly includes neighbors in our own family, our community, our nation, and our world. Obedience to the second commandment facilitates obedience to the first commandment. "When ye are in the service of your fellow beings ye are only in the service of your God" (Mosiah 2:17).
Baptism Transcends Background
On every continent and across isles of the sea, the faithful are being gathered into The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Differences in cultural background, language, gender, and facial features fade into insignificance as members lose themselves in service to their beloved Savior.
Only the comprehension of the true fatherhood of God can bring full appreciation of the true brotherhood of man. That understanding inspires desire to build bridges of cooperation instead of walls of segregation.
Intolerance seeds contention; tolerance supersedes contention. Tolerance is the key that opens the door to mutual understanding and love.
Risks of Boundless Tolerance
Now may I offer an important note of caution. An erroneous assumption could be made that if a little of something is good, a lot must be better. Not so! Overdoses of needed medication can be toxic. Boundless mercy could oppose justice. So tolerance, without limit, could lead to spineless permissiveness.
The Lord drew boundary lines to define acceptable limits of tolerance. Danger rises when those divine limits are disobeyed. Just as parents teach little children not to run and play in the street, the Savior taught us that we need not tolerate evil. "Jesus went into the temple of God, … and overthrew the tables of the moneychangers" (Matthew 21:12; see also Mark 11:15). Though He loves the sinner, the Lord said that He "cannot look upon sin with the least degree of allowance" (D&C 1:31).
Real love for the sinner may compel courageous confrontation—not acquiescence! Real love does not support self-destructing behavior.
Tolerance and Mutual Respect
Our commitment to the Savior causes us to scorn sin yet heed His commandment to love our neighbors. Together we live on this earth, which is to be tended, subdued, and shared with gratitude.2 Each of us can help to make life in this world a more pleasant experience.
The First Presidency and the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles issued a public statement from which I quote:
"It is morally wrong for any person or group to deny anyone his or her inalienable dignity on the tragic and abhorrent theory of racial or cultural superiority.
"We call upon all people everywhere to recommit themselves to the time-honored ideals of tolerance and mutual respect. We sincerely believe that as we acknowledge one another with consideration and compassion we will discover that we can all peacefully coexist despite our deepest differences."3
Together we may stand intolerant of transgression but tolerant of neighbors with differences they hold sacred. Our beloved brothers and sisters throughout the world are all children of God. He is our Father. His Son, Jesus, is the Christ. His Church has been restored to the earth in these latter days to bless all of God's children.


text:
Mettler Polysheen Embroidery Thread Color #1140 Meringue 800M
Mettler Poly Sheen Embroidery Thread is 100% Polyester. Mettler's Poly Sheen Thread encompases the best qualities of the viscose of the past and improves on it. Better elongation results in a 50% higher tensile strength which means you'll experience less thread breakage interrupting your stitching. Even under the most demanding situations, Mettler Poly Sheen's 100% trilobal polyester construction maintains its color brilliance. Poly Sheen is the best choice for a variety of projects, including quilting, decorative embroidery and thread painting.
Product Advantages:
NOTE: Photo may be of a smaller spool of the same color.
Product Advantages:
- High stitch consistency guaranteed - no interruptions in the stitching process due to thread breakage.
- An exceptionally long life for all embroidery - a shine that always looks like new.
- Embroidery stitches that stay absolutely colorfast, even when conditions are especially tough - such as chlorine bleach, wet or dry friction, washing and ironing.
- High brilliance for embroidery colors, so they're brighter and even more expressive.
- Poly Sheen can hardly be distinguished from rayon but is far easier to work with.
- Universal use - use of the same embroidery thread for a wide variety of textiles.
- A choice of colors that leaves no wish unfulfilled.
NOTE: Photo may be of a smaller spool of the same color.


text: You move. Your chair moves. Why not your desk, too? Named for the flexible work surface that slides to envelop you as you work, Envelop is the first desk designed to help you, your chair, your work surface, and your technology work in harmony. Available with a standard pin-height adjustment or sit-to-stand height adjustable legs, it can support a full range of healthy seated and standing postures.


text:
Josh Hamilton, the former first round pick of the Devil Rays is to be reinstated and participate in extended spring training. Hamilton, who has more tattoos and drug suspensions than career home runs hasn't played professional baseball since 2002 when he played 56 games for single-A Bakersfield. In the land of second, third and fourth chances, we hope that Hamilton, who is 25 now, has finally straightened his life out. We honestly thought his last suspension marked the end of Hamilton's career with Tampa. However, this is probably just a blip on the radar, as the chances of him ever making to the majors now seems unlikely. Still, we will keep an eye on his progress and hope for a miracle.
Hamilton temporarily reinstated [St. Pete Times]


text:
Sales Horizons
Quality from
start to finish
You set the pace deciding when and where you want to learn – worldwide.
Available on a computer, tablet or smartphone.
Easy to access and use – it's supported by Udemy.
Dynamic content – material added regularly.
Focus on
complex sales
- Textron
- Booz Allen
- Boston Scientific
- Smith & Nephew
Sales training provided to the Fortune 500 is available as online sale training courses for individual sales reps and to companies.
Online courses
ACE – Sales Skills: sales skills to win business, like opening, closing, handling objections, building credibility, selling value.
Take a look
Join Janet Spirer to learn more about ACE – Sales Skills.
Preview one of our most popular lessons – Selling Value.
Start now
Are you ready to start learning the sales skills that will help you win more business?
You can purchase ACE – Sales Skills right now.


text:
PEORIA, Ariz. (AP) — A shaky Felix Hernandez allowed four earned runs in 2 1/3 innings before the Seattle Mariners rallied late to beat the Texas Rangers 9-8 on Sunday.
Making his second Cactus League start, Hernandez (1-1) allowed four hits and walked one, while striking out four. Hernandez opened the game by issuing a leadoff walk to Jurickson Profar before sandwiching a pair of strikeouts around a flyout by Prince Fielder.
Hernandez, however, wasn't overly concerned at his pitching line.
"We're in spring training, man," he said. "I don't look at any results."
The 2010 American League Cy Young Award winner might have also had a bit of bad luck in the form of a couple of well-placed hits — a slow-rolling infield single and a flyball that dropped just in front of diving right fielder Corey Hart — as he worked through the Rangers' lineup.
Fielder got the best of Hernandez in the third, though, when he lined a double that scored Elvis Andrus and sparked a four-run inning. Hernandez left the game one batter later after striking out Michael Choice, who reached on a wild pitch.
In between starts, Hernandez said he paid special attention to working on his changeup. He liked the results he saw Sunday.
"Changeup was good, much better," he said. "Feel was better. I think the mechanics were way better."
Seattle's reserves scored six runs in the eighth, erasing Texas' five-run lead.
Rangers: Colby Lewis, also making his second spring appearance, held the Mariners scoreless over two innings, allowing a hit, a walk and struck out one. Texas manager Ron Washington was pleased with Lewis' outing.
"He was able to command his fastball, he had a good slider working, changeup," he said. "It was a nice outing for Colby."
Lewis signed a minor league contract in November with Texas after missing last season because of injuries.
"We're just going to keep ramping him up and see how he withstands it," Washington said. "So far, so good."
Rangers: Right fielder Alex Rios is nursing a mild right intercostal strain and did not play in a game for the fifth day in a row. Washington said Rios has been doing everything in practice except swing a bat and might return in the next two days.
"Just don't want to take a chance swinging right now because he could aggravate it," he said. "We're going to let it settle down before we put him back out there. But he's doing infield and throwing and running balls down in the outfield. Just not swinging the bat."
Outfielder Engle Beltre returned to action after sitting out the previous six days because of shin splints.
Mariners: Second baseman Robinson Cano has not played since having root canal surgery on Wednesday. Seattle manager Lloyd McClendon said there was a good possibility Cano would play Monday against Kansas City.
New Seattle closer Fernando Rodney struggled in his second spring training appearance. Rodney, who signed a two-year, $14-million contract in February, gave up a two-run single to Robinson Chirinos in the fifth. In two-third of an inning, Rodney allowed two earned runs on two hits and a walk, while striking out one.
Choice, Texas' cleanup hitter, hit his first homer of spring training, a solo shot off Zach Miner in the sixth inning. The right fielder went 1-for-3 with three runs scored.
"He's been doing a great job, he really has," Washington said of Choice, the backup at all three outfield positions. "Playing good defense, swinging the bat and he caught one today."
Rangers: Ace Yu Darvish was scheduled to make his third start of spring training Monday against Cincinnati right-hander Homer Bailey. Also scheduled to pitch for Texas were Joakim Soria, Ryan Feierabend, Neftali Feliz and Aaron Poreda.
Mariners: Brandon Maurer was slated to make his second start Monday against Kansas City and James Shields. Seattle's Yoervis Medina and Ramon Ramirez were also listed to pitch.
Copyright 2014 The Associated Press. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten or redistributed.


text:
PLAYERS CLUB Phrase Yellow Gold Chain Necklace
Item # ESTB-36101518M
- Handcrafted in 14-karat yellow gold.
- Chain measures 16-in. long.
- Phrase measures approximately 1.10-in. long.
- Finished with a spring ring clasp.
Designer Nikki Erwin has had a love for jewelry as far back as she can remember. As the first employee at Jennifer Meyer's eponymous jewelry line in 2004, Nikki honed in on the skills needed to run a successful luxury business and began creating single custom pieces for herself. Her very first design was a bold double finger knuckle ring (Now A Staple Of Her Line).
These unique custom pieces quickly became coveted, and nikki realized her edgy designs were something that was missing in the fine jewelry market. Thus, she began curating her own collection by accumulating her original pieces from over the years, and filling out the collection with complimentary new designs. After a year of editing the collection, established launched in the spring of 2015.
Since then, Established has become a noteworthy player in the fine jewelry market, owned and worn by a variety of well known public figures, tastemakers, and a loyal clientele. Established's design direction is unexpected and occasionally naughty, yet somehow transcends trends.
Any order of $100+ receives free ground shipping at YLANG23.com.
Ship times follow the processing of your order.
All orders are shipped with signature required upon delivery to protect your purchase.
We ship FedEx insured, and offer three shipping options within the continental United States:
- Standard/Ground (5-7 day delivery)
- Second-Day Air - Free with orders $150+
- Overnight Next-Day Air (does not include Saturday delivery)
For specific information on international delivery estimates, detailed shipping rates and more click here.
Holiday Return Policy:
Gifts purchased on the website between November 22, 2018 and December 24, 2018 can be returned for a full refund until January 4, 2019. Special orders may not be cancelled or returned.
We want you to be completely happy with your purchase, but if you are not satisfied for any reason, we offer free returns on regular-priced orders over $100 within seven days of receipt in their complete original packaging and in unworn condition. Please call us toll free at 1-866-952-6423 or email firstname.lastname@example.com for a prepaid return label that will be sent to the original email address associated with the order. Merchandise will be insured to YLANG23.com. Credit will not include original shipping charges.
Special orders may not be canceled or returned. We reserve the right to not ship special occasion jewelry or to ask for a written confirmation indicating your commitment of a final sale during holiday periods.
Unfortunately, exchanges cannot be issued at this time. If you wish to purchase a different item, the original item should be returned to Ylang 23 and a new order can be placed on the website.
Ylang 23 specializes in unique and one-of-a-kind designer jewelry, and we're happy to special order pieces on your behalf.
Special orders are outside the scope of regular designer production and, therefore, must be paid in full at the time of purchase.
All special orders are final sale and may not be cancelled, returned, or exchanged.
Our knowledgeable staff is happy to answer any questions about special orders and alterations to existing stock (ring sizes, necklace lengths, etc.). Timing and pricing will vary by designer.
Please email email@example.com or call 1-866-YLANG23 with your questions and requests.


text:
Page Six reports that Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin have been in the Hamptons all week. According to sources, "They were operating like a couple, and with the kids looked like a happy family".
Conveniently the latest GOOP newsletter is about the Hamptons.
There's been speculation for weeks whether or not the two are reconciling…or have already reconciled. No one really knows. I mean, isn't it just better for the children to be as civilised about this as possible – and that means continuing to enjoy each other, respect each other, be friends with each other. Like it was before…just without the sex…with each other.
There. That's your choice. Either they're consciously RE-coupling or they're winning some prize for the most amicable, elegant, high class divorce of all time.
It's the kind of thing people would bet on. They bet on everything. They bet on Prince G before he arrived – how much he'd weigh, what day, whether or not he'd cry when presented for the first time. Would you put money on a happy breakup or an imminent reunion?


text:
This Obama campaign ad, while a respite from the ol' adorable-little-girl fear-mongering gambit employed often by the GOP, is pretty harsh. Set to the Mittens Romney rendition of "America The Beautiful," which he often performs during speeches, it informs viewers that Romney has stayed afloat by shipping jobs overseas to Mexico, China and India, also alleging that Romney has "millions" in banks in Bermuda and the Cayman Islands.
Romney's camp has hit back, calling the ad "reckless" and "absurd," but the Democrats have withheld the apology they demanded.
'Obama Campaign's Brutal Ad Slams Romney For Swiss, Cayman Accounts' [Buzzfeed]
No Apologies: Obama Campaign Continues Attacks on Romney' [The New York Times]


text: To maximize your pleasure, comfort and enjoyment on the water, you need a pontoon that literally can be all things to all people. Enter the state-of-the-art Sunliner 250, with its five dynamic floorplans and extra measures of convenience and luxury, such as the hidden, pull-up changing room, plush thick-foam seating, built-in cushion headrests, elegant fabrics and the latest technology. The Cruise floorplan provides a walk-through gate in the bow, swim platform access aft to starboard, two deluxe bow lounges and a sweeping L-shaped aft lounge with available stern sunpad. The DL offers dual rear-facing loungers with a safety railing, while the EB provides an entertainment bar with stools and stylish, lighted cupholders. Anglers will appreciate the Fish and Cruise, or FC, floorplan, which incorporates two stern fish seats, a well-appointed workstation, livewell and rodholders, while FS version provides four fish seats, with two in the bow and two in the stern. This is the perfect way to enjoy gracious, relaxed on-water living while accommodating those who seek watersports thrills, high-tech performance and fishing adventures.


text:
Right off the bat I will admit that I goofed on the colors for this cake and I am missing the green layer. I'M MISSING THE GREEN LAYER. There, I feel better now. Use your favorite recipe for vanilla buttercream. While I will use a cake mix for cakes, I don't use pre-made icing. It just doesn't compare to homemade.We made about 6 cups of frosting, making sure to set some aside to tint and garnish the cake with green icing.
Tools for the job:
- 1 cake leveler/slicer
- 1 set of icing colors
- parchment paper
- 9 inch round cake pans
- Piping bag plus tips for frosting the edges of the cake
- Angled spatula for spread frosting
- Cake lifter
After you remove the cake from the pan, remove the parchment paper. Use a cake leveler to create 1" cake layers. Using the cake lifter, place the bottom layer on your cake plate and make sure it is centered. Frost and repeat. Frost the entire cake with white vanilla frosting. Be sure to be gentle and if you get any crumbs on your angled spatula, be sure to wipe it clean. Garnish with decorations and serve!


text:
This site is the archived OWASP Foundation Wiki and is no longer accepting Account Requests.
To view the new OWASP Foundation website, please visit https://owasp.org
OWASP/Training/OWASP Webslayer Project
From OWASP
|Overview & Goal
|WebSlayer is a tool designed for bruteforcing Web Applications, it can be used for finding not linked resources (directories, servlets, scripts, etc), bruteforce GET and POST parameters, bruteforce Forms parameters (User/Password), Fuzzing, etc.
The tools have a payload generator and a easy and powerful results analyzer.
Some features are:
| The training will show how to use the tool and will cover the following topics:
| The training is a hands on course, so it is recommended to bring your own laptop (it´s possible to follow the training without a computer)
The latest version of Webslayer can be downloaded from google code subversion here.