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Sunday, September 30, 2007
But it Looked Cute on the Hanger
Hmmm, I thought. Interesting jewelry. I've got a painted macaroni necklace the kids made me. That's pretty interesting.
At this point, I realized that my wardrobe was sadly lacking in the "non" - jeans and t-shirts arena. I figured it was time I did a little clothes shopping. Now, I don't particularly care for clothes shopping. I look forward to shopping for clothing as much as I look forward to my kids coming home from school in the afternoon - it's fun for the first few minutes. I actually enjoy perusing the racks of clothing. I don't mind searching for my size from among the possibilities. Taking the clothes into the dreaded dressing room is the part I could live without.
The store I went to this weekend had this really great feature in the dressing rooms. Perhaps you've witnessed this feature yourself. It's a doorbell. A very. loud. doorbell. You walk into the room and "ding dong" sounds loudly enough for people in the next state to hear. Why is this? Why do they need a doorbell? I've never once, in my entire life, seen a dressing room attendant run to the entrance and say, "Oh hello! I heard the doorbell and thought I'd come welcome you to the dressing rooms!" In fact, come to think of it, I don't believe I've ever seen a dressing room attendant period, let alone one who would run to greet you.
So, after causing permanent damage to my hearing from the doorbell, I took the clothing that I thought looked very nice on the hangers into an open room. I pushed aside the mountain of clothes left behind by a person who apparently thought it was just too much trouble to remove the clothes from the room and hang them on the return rack. I mean, trying on clothing can be exhausting. Clearly the patron before me didn't have the strength to gather up her items and walk the four whole feet out of the room to the return rack. Perfectly understandable. Actually, other people's laziness has come in handy for me at times. Have you ever been in a dressing room and seen a top, left in the room by the previous occupant, and thought, "Wow! I love that shirt! It's my size! I must have it!"?
Anyway, amid the piles of clothing, in front of the wonderful three-paneled mirrors, in the glorious lighting that's always present in dressing rooms, I began the depressing ritual of trying to convince myself that I don't look quite as bad as the mirrors are telling me I look, and the outfit that looked cute on the hanger looks just as cute on me.
Am I the only one who takes back three identical pairs of pants in three different sizes? Seriously, I don't think there's an industry standard for women's pants. I could wear three different sizes in three different brands and I never know which will fit, so I generally bring three pairs in to try on. It's much better than walking in and out of the room looking for a different size and hearing the doorbell again and again.
Of course, I start with the largest size. (It's always a little boost to the ego to bring in a pair that you know is going to be bit big on you.) Try on the largest pair first and then exclaim, loudly enough for everyone else to hear, "Oh these pants are HUGE on me! I need a smaller size." After you've gotten that out of the way, it somehow doesn't seem so bad when you try on something so small that you require medical attention after attempting to button it.
So after pulling on pair after pair of pants and shirt after shirt, turning this way and that, examining myself in the mirror, sucking in my stomach until I felt light-headed, standing on my tip-toes to fool the mirror into thinking I'm taller, and realizing that my gray roots really need to be touched up again, I call it a day. I came home with a few items, which were on sale, by the way. I judge my shopping spree, not by what I bought, but by how much I saved on what I bought. I have a friend, Melissa, who is the Queen of the Bargain. Seriously, she should teach classes. I don't know anyone else who can come home from shopping with 2 pairs of jeans, a sweater, 3 tops, 4 new throw pillows, a necklace and bracelet set, a handbag, and 2 pairs of shoes for $10.99 plus tax.
So, my clothing finds are hanging here from the knob on my dresser. I keep looking at them, disliking them more every time I pass by. I'll probably end up returning all of it and starting over again. Oh well, at least I was able to go by myself this weekend. You thought grocery shopping with the kids was bad. Try tugging on some jeans with one hand while holding onto your toddler, so he can't crawl under the dressing room door, with the other. All the while keeping the door shut with your foot because the lock is broken and the baby keeps trying to open the door from her seat in the stroller. Now that's fun.
Saturday, September 29, 2007
Mom Always Said, "Don't Play Ball in the House."
Good idea - making up games to play with younger siblings
Bad idea - taking off every couch cushion and dragging out every blanket in order to play game
Really bad idea - tying blankets to and stacking cushions by the front door, prohibiting anyone from entering your house
Good idea - writing and illustrating a book to read to siblings
Bad idea - soaking pages of book in pickle juice to give it an "aged" look
Really bad idea - putting the pages in the microwave to dry (this is a really, REALLY bad idea)
Good idea - helping mom by sweeping up the dirt mess you made on the kitchen floor
Bad idea - sweeping dirt under the rug while mom is watching
Really bad idea - lying to mom and telling her that you didn't just sweep the dirt under the rug
Good idea - making a little snack for you and your siblings
Bad idea - making homemade caramel without a recipe
Really bad idea - burning brown sugar and butter until the smoke alarms go off and then abandoning mess, leaving it for mom to clean up
Good idea - playing ball
Bad idea - in the house
Really bad idea - using glue to try to fix the vase you broke (ok, so I stole that one from the Brady Bunch)
After I made my bed this morning, my little boy came in my room, jumped on my bed and proceeded to roll himself up in my comforter. Errrr! Clayton! Look what you did to my bed! I just made it! Come out from there now!
A little voice, muffled from the confines of the comforter, said, "But I can't come out. I'm not a butterfly yet." A few seconds later, he emerged from the wrappings of my comforter and "flew" off my bed,
I was typing away on my computer this evening when my son walked into my room and said, "Mom, do you have any medicine for overgrown toes?"
I continue typing, not really paying attention. Several seconds pass until what he's asked, finally clicks in my head.
"Overgrown toes???" I look down at his feet. Sure enough, he has an "overgrown" toe, the product of a baseball stuffed into the end of his sock. I burst out laughing.
I love when they do something goofy like that out of nowhere.
Well, I'm off to watch Harry Potter with the kids. 'Night!
Friday, September 28, 2007
When Angry, Count to Four; When Very Angry, Swear.
Thursday, September 27, 2007
Someone Just HAD to do the Math Problem!
To the people who answered the math problem last night - what's wrong with you?! Seriously. That's just wrong. And sad. And I got that problem or formula or eye-bleeding string of numbers and letters, or whatever it was from online. I typed in "math problems" and it popped up.
To the person who asked me for a meatloaf recipe - seriously? You want a meatloaf recipe from me? I'm not Paula Dean. Or Rachel Ray. Or basically anyone who makes meatloaf. I am wondering, however, what on earth mince is. Oh yes, and you'll appreciate this, when saying goodnight to my son this evening, he responded with, "Goodnight ole chap. Pip pip cheerio." Apparently he's British now.
I didn't mean to mislead anyone about the donations to St. Jude's. When I said that even a dollar makes a difference, I didn't realize there was a $10 minimum. I apologize. And I want to thank all the people who donated! You're awesome!
Thanks to all the people who said, "You might want to double check and make sure the hermit crab is actually dead before you bury him." That is, thank you for making me feel guilty that I may have inadvertently suffocated a poor molting hermit crab. Actually, I'm quite certain that he was indeed dead. I think.
Ok, I need to get back to writing my chapter on sick kids. Speaking of, I took my middle daughter to the doctor today because she's been home sick with a fever all week. Why is it, that after six kids, I still don't know when to take my kids to the doctor? I'll bring them in and inevitably they'll get the diagnosis of "Snotty Nose". I'm told, " Take them home, give them juice and they'll be fine in another day. That'll be $20.00." Of course they're fine in another day and I kick myself for not waiting "just one more day". On the other hand, if I wait that "one more day" before bringing them to the doctor, I'll get there and the doctor will look at me and say I'm the most neglectful mom on the planet and how could I have waited so long to bring my child in and their ears are infected and they have strep throat and their tongues are green and spotted, and they have some rash on their hair and their toes are swollen five times their usual size and how could I have not noticed that their skin was an interesting shade of chartreuse. I just can't win. So Lexi got the Snotty Nose diagnosis today.
Now I'm going back to writing. As soon as I put my baby down, that is. It's quite the fun-filled challenge trying to type when you're holding a baby who has just put their foot up your nose. Trust me. Have a good night!
Wednesday, September 26, 2007
One million is the number of diapers I've changed in the past (almost) thirteen years. Ok, so maybe I haven't changed quite a million, but I figure at a conservative 4 diapers a day, and an average of 3 years per child (except for Brooklyn who has only had 1 1/2 years of diaper changes), I've changed over 24,000 diapers. I was going to figure out how much I've spent on diapers, but I decided it would probably be too depressing. And don't bother to write and tell me that I should've used cloth diapers because there was NO WAY I was going there.
One million is the amount of money it cost for Lee Majors bionic arms. (The rest of his body was five million, of course.)
One million is the number of months I've been pregnant or breastfeeding. Again, perhaps I'm exaggerating just a tiny bit. Let's see... I guess it's about 103 months, or roughly 8 1/2 years.
One million is the number of pieces that fall in The Newsboys' song (on the right of this blog.)
One million is the number of times my son has told me that he's bored today.
One million is the number of cribs recalled by Simplicity/Graco. Have you heard about this? If I understand correctly, this is their third recall of cribs! The number of children's products recalled recently is ridiculous. Not only did children die/get seriously injured in these cribs, but the manufacturer apparently took more than two years before recalling the defective beds. If you have one of these cribs, stop using it immediately and please pass this information along to anyone you know who may have one of these cribs. This recall includes models that were manufactured as far back as nearly ten years ago! Anyone could have one of these, could have passed one on to a friend or relative, or could have one packed away.
I don't have this problem as my baby is a spoiled brat who has all of us wrapped around her little finger and she sleeps with me. Shhhh.
One million is the number of calories I've consumed today.
One million is the number of times my daughter has asked me to get her some shampoo today.
One million is the number of times I've told my son to settle down in the last hour.
One million is the answer to this problem D { ( f (x) ) ² } = 2f (x) D { f (x) } = 2f (x) f ' (x). Ok, so I don't really know the answer to this problem. In fact my eyes started to bleed when I looked at it. But I'm pretty sure it could be one million. I hope nobody actually likes math enough to figure this problem out just for fun, (math/fun, now there's an oxymoron!) but I somehow know that I'll get a comment tomorrow with the answer.
One million is the number of tears my son has cried over his "best friend" Bahama, the hermit crab.
The gravestone that my oldest son made for Jackson's crab. He found the wood in the garage and covered it with White Out for that lovely antiquey look.
Tuesday, September 25, 2007
It's a Smurf! It's a Blueberry! No, it's Brooklyn!
ME: Oh really?
CLAY: Uh huh.
ME: Where does Twindy live?
ME: I see. How old is Twindy?
ME: Do I know Twindy? Have I ever seen her?
CLAY: Yes, you got gas, remember?
CLAY: You drove me there and got gas for your car and I slept over at her house.
ME: I drove you to Twindy's house so you could sleep over?
CLAY: Yes.
ME: When did you meet her?
CLAY: Five years ago.
ME: Interesting. You do know you're only three years old now, right? So what does Twindy look like?
ME: Purple hair?! Wow! What do you do with Twindy?
ME: Sure! Can I go along too and pretend that I live a normal life while I'm there?
Monday, September 24, 2007
Questions From you, the Viewer
When will the ABC World News show air?
The producers probably saw the footage shot at my house and decided it was just too bad to show on national t.v. and the tape now sits in the recycling bin.
Actually, I still don't know. I'll post about it on my blog as soon as I find out.
Why does it take a year and a half for your blog to load?
I have no idea! It does the same thing for me. In fact most blogs on blogspot.com take a long time to load for me. My suggestion is to click on my blog then go pick up the cereal on the floor, change the laundry, throw something in the crockpot, refill your coffee cup (adding Bailey's Irish Creme is optional), unload the dishwasher and try to figure out why you're suddenly missing eight spoons. When you return to your desk, it should be fully loaded.
What is wrong with the first people who commented on your post last night?
Nothing at all. As soon as I published my post, I realized I'd messed up and I went back to edit it. The pictures without the captions showed up for them which is why they thought it was a riddle. What does a snake skin, a big orange ball, and a wad of tangled up hair have in common? The answer, of course, is - my kids spent the afternoon with dad! Need I say more?
Do you really teach your kids to read in the bathtub?
Yes, I teach them to read in the bathtub as much as I teach them to run with scissors, put nailpolish on the t.v., and dart across the street without first checking for traffic.
Can you show us a picture of your daughter's impromptu haircut?
I can't right now because she's sleeping. I guess I passed my cold onto her. I had to pick her up early from school today because she had a fever and a croupy cough. The poor school nurse. Every time she calls me, I answer in a less than enthusiastic, "Which kid is it this time?" My middle son just likes to visit the nurse, I think. She now has strict instructions from me as to how to deal with him when he walks into her office. She's to ask him, "Are there any bones protruding from your skin? Are you unconscious? No? Then go back to class. Do not pass go. Do not collect $200." Seriously, she's a very sweet woman and I don't blame my son for wanting to go hang out in her office every now and then.
How can I find out more about your book?
Well, it's going to be written on paper. I'm pretty sure it will have a title. Oh and a cover! It will definitely have a cover. That's about all I know right now, but I've got a little form on the right side of my blog where you can feel free to sign up for information about the book.
You mentioned moms whose husbands work long hours and moms whose husbands are deployed. What about us single moms?
I didn't intentionally omit the single moms. Of course it would be difficult for single moms to find some "me time" every day, or even every month, I imagine. So to every stay-at-home mom, working mom, work-from-home mom, work-from-home dad, stay-at-home dad, working dad, grandparent, godparent, single parent, married parent, living together in some sort of arrangement parent, mom of few kids, mom of many kids, anyone with the letters M, O, and M in their names, and anyone else I might have forgotten about, pat yourselves on the back! You're doing a very important job and you're awesome! Repeat after me, I'm good enough and I'm smart enough and doggone it, people like me.
Will you be doing a book give-away like the one you just did when your book comes out? I'm sure I will! :)
Why do you make your smiley faces with a semi-colon instead of a colon, like this :)? Huh? Smileys? Ohhhh, so that's what those are? I had no idea. I just thought that was a fun way to punctuate a sentence.
P.S. If I was going to make a smiley, I'd use a colon. If I was going to make a winking smiley, I'd use a semi-colon. ;) Got it?
That banana looks familiar. Did you steal it from my car? Ummm yes. Yes, that's what I do in my spare time. I break into other people's vehicles and steal decomposing fruit because I just don't find quite enough of that stuff in my own house.
Now it's time for me to ask a question. A few of you have said that you've given me an award and to visit your blog to get it. That's so very sweet and thoughtful of you! However, I'm really slow here. Explain in simple "a 2 year old could understand" terms as to what I'm supposed to do with it. I'm sorry, but I'm just not familiar with this. Remember I just started this blog a couple months ago. Thank you for your help!
Because September is Childhood Cancer Awareness Month, I want to post he following text taken from an article written by Brian and Stacey Ledwon.Childhood cancer is not fair. It is not fair to the children that suffer from it each and every day. It is not fair to parents who try to do what is best for their children under extremely difficult circumstances. It is not fair to siblings that have their life suddenly turned upside down. Our family knows firsthand how ugly childhood cancer is, as our 5-year old daughter Lindsey has been battling a rare brain cancer since September 2004. Did you know:
• 12,500 children will be diagnosed with cancer this year
• Cancer is the leading cause of death by disease in children under 15
• 2,300 children will die from cancer this year
• Incidence of cancer among children in the United States is rising about 1 percent each year, however, survivorship is also rising
• 1 in every 330 Americans develop cancer before the age of 20
I have a button on the right side of this blog for St. Jude's Research Hospital. If you are able, please consider making a donation. One dollar makes a difference. Think of how many people have read this blog this past month. There have been nearly a million hits! Imagine a dollar, just ONE dollar per hit. Wow!
Sunday, September 23, 2007
Excuse me, But You Seem to Have a Scorpion on Your Head
Anyway, I digress again. So, my husband took the kids out for a walk so I could do a little writing in peace and quiet. I sat down and stared at the blank screen for awhile. Then I played
Somehow, in between changing loads of laundry and eating not one, not two, but THREE donuts, I managed to write four pages. I was just finishing up when the kids all come storming in the house from their walk. My oldest son thrusts this in my face....
It's a snake skin! A SNAKE SKIN! From a real live SNAKE! He put it in my face! I fell off my chair.
Then my daughter showed me the jawbreaker that dear old dad got my son. Yes, I know it looks like a racquetball. My son insisted he could put this whole thing in his mouth at once because (and I quote) "They did it on Ed, Edd and Eddy." Oh, well if a CARTOON character on quite possibly the dumbest cartoon ever made, did it, then by all means, shove that racquetball sized jawbreaker in your mouth. I'll start dialing 9-1-1.
To finish off my evening, my little Princess girl tried taking the tiny braids out of her hair by herself. This one didn't fare so well. I couldn't undo the knot, so she got an impromptu haircut tonight.
Thus ends my weekend of fun.
P.S. Trish asked me to pick out one more winner for a copy of her book because we were so close to 900 comments. So......(closing my eyes and scrolling away) Brea in Texas, you're the ninth recipient of Trish's book! An email will be sent to you shortly. Congratulations!
And thank you to Trish for answering questions and offering 9 books to my readers! :)
Saturday, September 22, 2007
Butt, Butt, Butt, Butt
Ok the moment you've all been waiting for :::::::drumroll::::::: Here are the names of the eight winners of the Blook Tour! They will each receive a copy of Trish Berg's The Great American Supper Swap!
In no particular order....
Ann Marie
Separate emails were just sent to your email addresses. Congratulations and good luck on starting your own supper swapping groups! Trish has answered many questions in the comments section of this post. If you have additional questions for Trish, please feel free to visit her at her website and ask away!
Thank you to everyone who participated and left a comment!
I know I didn't update last night, but I have a good
Anyway, as I was saying, one of my best friends on earth, Jen, and I went out to eat last night. We did really well too. We talked at length and didn't mention diapers even once during our conversation. Neither of us felt compelled to cut the other's entree into bite size pieces and we never told one another, "Finish your drink, a napkin is not a toy, or don't chew with your mouth open." We did very well being Jen and Dawn instead of just "Mom" and "Mom". All was wonderful until a little kid came running by our table and Jen nearly reached out to grab him and tell him to settle down until she remembered that he was not her child and she was out for the evening alone.
I thought of getting all philosophical about how we parents sometimes forget the people we were pre-kids and become "So & So's Mom" or "So & So's Dad". I was going to sing the importance of retaining some of you, the person. I was going to warn against becoming only you, the mom. I know the experts say to take a class, take up a hobby, learn a new skill, get out and exercise, make a little time, every day, for you. However, in the real world, I also know it's sometimes impossible. For those with tight finances, it's usually not affordable to just "take a class" or buy supplies for your hobby. For those whose spouse works long hours or is deployed, how are you supposed to find time to go to the gym or even read a book some days? And is it really so horrible to put your life on hold, so to speak, to become so & so's mother? So & so will only be little for a short while. You've got your whole life ahead of you to take up skydiving, poker, knitting, painting, tennis, or whatever it is you want to do. Just a thought.
Ok, back to my story. So I went out to eat with my best friend, Jen and after dinner, I went back to her home to borrow their video camera. So I'm sitting there talking to Jen, her husband, 3 boys, and 1 daughter. I'm not sure who started it, but suddenly the conversation turned to butts. (As you'll recall from a previous post, "butt" is the funniest word in the English language.) However, it's not just funny in English, as I learned from these guys.
"Dad, how do you say "butt" in Polish?
Dad answers, but I've forgotten what the word was. Apparently it was hilarious though as the boys all started parroting "butt" in Polish.
Butt, butt, butt, butt.
Jen looks at me, rolls her eyes and says, "I'm here all day with the kids trying to teach them not to say stuff like that. He comes home and in mere seconds has them being obnoxious in foreign languages."
And we're in Chicago. Chicago has the second highest concentration of Polish people next to Poland. Someone is bound to understand what they're saying in school come Monday. Gee, thanks Dad!
The hole Clay dug into his wall.
The instrument of destruction. Thankfully it was a safety nightlight, or I can only imagine what he would have done with the screwdriver. In fact, I'm actually pretty surprised he didn't try to unscrew the nightlight. Oh and where did he even get the screwdriver? Out of my middle son's tool box in the garage, of course.
Do not adjust your monitors. Yes, she really does have a white beard. Diaper cream - it's not just for butts anymore.
Brooklyn's artwork. Markers have a way of multiplying in my house. For every Sharpie I toss out, two more appear, much like the Hydra fought by Hercules. Thankfully this came right off with a diaper wipe.
And the Piece de resistance, the banana peel found in my car today. The only way I knew it was a banana peel was from the Chiquita sticker. Ok, this trend of finding food is getting embarrassing, quite frankly. I can understand the occasional fruit snack in the couch cushions, cracker under the chair, wrapper behind the dresser, and French fry on the floor of my car, but this is ridiculous. My wonderful husband cleaned out my van today. He filled the tires with air, the tank with gas, and he washed it inside and out. I'd like to say this disgusting banana was all he found, but alas he found enough nasty, moldy fruit to cover Carmen Miranda's head. I think I may have to put locks on the fridge and cabinets.
Thursday, September 20, 2007
Mmmmm Spam Cordon Bleu
No day would be complete without finding some sort of food item lying around the house. Here we have a waffle triangle on the book shelf. This waffle was from dinner. Last night. I didn't even notice the red bottle until I loaded this picture on my blog. Duh. I went back and grabbed it off the shelf. It was filled with little game pieces. What else would be in a bottle on a bookshelf?
Speaking of books.... I made the mistake of letting Clay play in the bathtub as it drained while I got Brooklyn ready for bed. My husband got home from work right at that moment, walked into the bathroom and discovered an inch of water on the floor. This library book was in the water because, you know, I've taught the kids to read in the bathtub just for fun. It looks like we've bought yet another library book. I'm pretty sure between all our mishaps and overdue fines, we've financed a new wing at our local library.
Yep, the last page is as wet as the first page. I think the mom in this picture is looking at her son and thinking, "Yay, the Benedryl just kicked in! Whew!"
Ok, to all you folks from Minnesota, yes I know that Spam is made in your great state. It's really not something I'd brag about, however. Think about it. And although I'm usually confused and don't know what I'm talking about, I really did mean Spamarama in Austin, TX. Seriously, they have a Spam Ball, Spamalympics, and a Spam cook-off. Some of the winning recipes were Spam Cordon Bleu, the French way to enjoy a potted pork meat-like product, Pirates Deadman Spam, I think the name says it all, and Velvet Hotdog Wedding Cake, can you just envision the folks who would celebrate their wedding with this cake?
Speaking of Minnesota, we took a little trip there in November with some friends a couple years ago. I suggest if you visit Minnesota in November, you be prepared for temperatures of negative 40 degrees or so. We paid a visit to the Mall of America which was really insanely huge! I stopped at a grocery store during the trip to buy some ice cream (because the negative 40 degree temps just weren't quite cold enough). The ice cream cost $2.95. I stood there waiting for the cashier to tell me my total, but he just said, "$2.95." I waited patiently for him to figure out that he hadn't totaled it and added the tax. He waited there not so patiently for me to pay him already! I had no idea there were states out there that don't pay tax on food! Incredible. Of course this is also a state that had a sign in a restaurant stating something along the lines of, "Guns are not permitted in this restaurant. Please leave any guns outside." Too bad because I was looking forward to being held up while eating my soup.
Jackson informed me a couple hours ago that Clay had made a hole in the wall of their bedroom.
A hole? What do you mean - a hole?
Come see!
Sure enough there was a hole in the drywall. It wasn't that large, but it was fairly deep. I suspect he was trying to dig his way out much like Andy in Shawshank Redemption. His mistake was not putting a Farrah Fawcett poster over the hole. Tomorrow he's busted. I can just see him trying to fill the hole with chewed gum or yogurt or something.
Wednesday, September 19, 2007
I Won't Send you Canned Lunchmeat
Anyway, back to what I was saying - No one will sell or give away your address. No one, except me, will use your address for any purpose whatsoever and the only thing I'll use it for is to send you a newsletter four times a year about the status of my book, book signings, contests to win a signed copy of my book, etc. So, if you're interested, please feel free to sign up! :)
My little Brooklyn is sick and crabby tonight and doesn't want me to put her down. I think the stress of the past month and my cold have finally caught up to me also and I feel like I have an elephant sitting on my chest, so I'm leaving tonight's post to Trish...
Ok, Ladies. I have to be honest. When Dawn first offered to run my blook tour for TGASS, I was a bit nervous. Because you all love her so much, rightfully so since she IS AWESOME! I felt like the friend of a friend being introduced as the new kid in school. And yes, I felt like the geek. Then, the morning after Dawn posted the blook tour, I checked in and there were NO COMMENTS - ZERO! I was devastated. I called Dawn immediately on the phone and told her I was sorry, I must be a blog killer. Like first degree murder, I would be forever known as the blog killer.
But praise God, you all accepted me – Thank you! I am overwhelmed by your response and interest in supper swapping. And I encourage you to give it a try….
And BIG NEWS - I HAVE DECIDED SINE YOU HAVE SHOWN SUCH AN INTEREST IN SUPPER SWAPPING AND THE GREAT AMERICAN SUPPER SWAP I WILL BE GIVING AWAY 1 FREE BOOK FOR EVERY 100 COMMENTS POSTED BY FRIDAY MIDNIGHT. SO PASS THE WORD TO ALL YOUR GIRLFRIENDS. SO FAR WE ARE UP TO 6 FREE BOOKS AT OVER 600 COMMENTS!
Dawn wanted to post some more advice for you ladies. Here are the steps to get you started. These are from my site.
1. START WITH WHO YOU KNOW – Ask a neighbor, a girlfriend, or a co-worker to
give it a try.
2. HAVE COMMON GROUND – Either live nearby, attend church together, or work at
the same company so delivery can be easily coordinated at that common location daily or
3. PLAN 3 MONTHS OUT - Choose and plan your meals for at least three months at a
time, and write or print them on a meal calendar so each family knows what is being delivered
for dinner each night.
4. START WITH FAMILY FAVORITES - Choose recipes to start with that are your
family favorites. New recipes should be tried out on your individual family before they are
introduced into the co-op.
5. AVOID PAN-DEMONIUM - Use 9x9 or 9x13 glass Pyrex pans with snap on blue lids,
semi-disposable Zip-Loc containers, and Whale of a Pal Tubs for soups and stews. Rotate them
through the group (See the Pan Formula in my Great American Supper Swap book)
6. HONESTY TASTES BETTER - When you establish your meal calendars, be honest
and up front about food likes, dislikes, and allergies to avoid problems down the road.
7. BUDGET MEALS - Buy ingredients in bulk for your meals when items are on sale. Try
to budget recipes so you don't make two expensive ones back to back. (i.e. pot roast is more
expensive than pizza burgers)
8. ADAPT DELIVERY TIMES - Delivery times can vary depending on what works for
each family. If you deliver at dinnertime, have the meal cooked and ready to eat. If you deliver in the morning, have your meal prepared but not cooked with baking instruction included.
9. BE FLEXIBLE - Be flexible with one another when life throws you a curve ball, like a
sick child, a broken down car, or unexpected circumstance. Have a meal back up plan for those
nights agreed upon at the outset, like switching days or having pizza delivered if you are in a
10. RELAX AND ENJOY THE RIDE - Relax and enjoy the ride. Don't expect your supper
swapping group to remain stagnant or to last forever; some families may swap longer than
others. If a mom leaves, let them do so guilt free. We typically ask for one month's notice so we
can adapt our meal calendars.
You can get more information and recipes on Trish's website.
Trish has answered many other questions in the comments section of my Monday post "You Mean I Only Have to Cook Once a Week?" To recap - Trish will be giving away 1 free book for every 100 comments left on that thread. We're up to 6 free books right now. It's not too late to get in on the contest - just leave a comment on the Supper Swapping post with your name and email address and we'll enter you in the drawing.
Tuesday, September 18, 2007
Bill Cosby Would Feed his Child THIS Breakfast
Let's see, my kids spilled hermit crab food, Cheerios, water, and some more Cheerios all before 10:00. I think the camera crew pretty much just filmed me vacuuming all day. Then, stellar parent that I am, I fed Clayton chocolate pudding for breakfast. You know, because he had a tonsillectomy. He has to eat soft food. Pudding is soft. Of course, it never occurred to me that I could've made him scrambled eggs. Or pancakes. I could have given him applesauce or cheese. Something with some modicum of nutritive value. But noooo, I gave him chocolate pudding. In front of the cameras. The cameras videotaping my every move for America to see. I didn't even use Bill Cosby-like reasoning either. "Pudding has milk. Milk is good. Pudding for breakfast!" Nope, that thought didn't even cross my mind. :::shaking my head at myself:::
The woman who interviewed me, Barbara Pinto, was super nice. She even sat on the floor and played "animals" with Clay. She was very friendly and easy to talk to. She asked me wonderful questions. I answered her like a dork. Seriously. I really did. I'm not sure why. I'm really not nervous in front of cameras. It didn't freak me out that they were at my house filming, yet somehow my brain stopped functioning properly and I stuttered and repeated myself and sounded all around stupid. As Murphy's Law would have it, I thought of brilliant things to say. After she left. I kept thinking of clever retorts, and meaningful dialog. After she left. I felt like begging her to come back so I could have a "do-over"! Oh well. It probably wasn't as bad as I think it was and hopefully some genius at ABC will edit out all my stupidness and make me look articulate on t.v.
Oh yeah, and not to leave out the producer, Andy, he was great too. In fact he got to play babysitter to Brooklyn while the camera crew got a few more shots of Barbara and me. Brooklyn wasn't even crying when we got done and Brooklyn cries for everyone!
I don't know when this is going to air, but I will certainly let you guys know as soon as I find out! Even if I end up looking like a dork, it was still a really fun experience and I'm thankful for the opportunity to look like a dork on national television.
Something I didn't say (because, of course, I thought of it after they left) is that I believe so many moms can relate to me because I'm just an ordinary person. I'm an ordinary mom doing ordinary things and I have ordinary kids who act like kids, not like little robot adults. It's nice to see someone else doing the same things/going through the same things that you are. It's depressing trying to live up to that "Perfect Mom" image. You know the type of mom who showers. Every day! The kind of mom who always has on nice clothing, make-up, and actual hair care products. The kind of mom whose children are clean and dressed to the nines. The sort of mom who has a floor so clean you can eat off it, not the kind of mom who has a floor you can eat off of simply because there are so many crumbs on it. You know, the kind of mom who doesn't feed their kid chocolate pudding for breakfast on national t.v. Instead of trying to live up to Perfect Mom, it's much more comforting to know you're not alone in your quest to both love your kids, and to make it through the day without breaking down, curling up into a fetal position and rocking back and forth.
Monday, September 17, 2007
Diapers Only Hold so Much Before They.....
A camera crew from ABC is coming over tomorrow to film and interview me for World News with Charles Gibson. Tonight I really should be cleaning. Or thinking of clever things to say to the reporter. Or perhaps getting some sleep. Or losing 50 pounds. Or begging my children to behave tomorrow morning. Instead I'll be cleaning out my washing machine. I know, you're thinking 'what a strange thing to do when she's going to be on national t.v.' Cleaning out my washing machine wasn't my first choice of activities, however I inadvertently washed a diaper. I'm not talking about the cloth kind either. I'm talking about a disposable, super-mega absorbent, nighttime, pull-up kind of diaper. SpongeBob couldn't hold as much liquid as this thing did. Then, much like all good things, it had to end. It exploded. In my washer. It left behind a trail of sticky gel-like material and fluffy diaper particles all over every article of clothing in the machine. Despite the fact that I'll run the washing machine fifty times, I'll be finding this gel stuck to surfaces in my house for months to come.
Sunday, September 16, 2007
I Only Have to Cook Once a Week?!
Trish started emailing me during my Ebay auction. She thought I might be a bit overwhelmed (can't imagine what gave her that idea), so she jumped right in and offered up her wise advise and prayers. I can't thank her enough for helping me to navigate the waters. The reason Trish was so very knowledgeable and helpful to me is that she is a published author and national speaker who is working on another book due out in January 2008. She knows what she's talking about.
I'm hosting this tour for Trish, not only because she's an amazing person with a really kind, good heart, but because her book is awesome! I really didn't know what "supper swapping" was until I read her book, but what a terrific idea it is! I can't wait to get a group of friends together and give it a try. Hey, anything to shave off a few minutes in the kitchen and save a few dollars is worth a try if you ask me! Trish shares her expertise on supper swapping or co-op cooking, as it is also known, and includes examples from her own supper swapping experiences. She includes helpful hints to get you started, fellowship ideas, and (my favorite part) some of her tried and true recipes.
And (here's the really cool part!) anyone who leaves a comment on this posting will be entered into a drawing for a FREE copy of Trish's book The Great American Supper Swap! Trish will be giving away, not one, but TWO free books this week to the readers of my blog who leave a comment on this posting during the tour which will run from Sunday night, September 16 when I post it until Friday night, September 21 at midnight Eastern time. Also, feel free to write to Trish with any questions you might have about supper swapping. Here's a little interview with Trish...
The Great American Supper Swap
Solving the Busy Woman's Family Dinnertime Dilemma
By Trish Berg
Many moms struggle with their endless to-do list, and dinner is just one more thing that usually doesn't get done. Author and speaker Trish Berg has a great way to solve your dinnertime dilemma and shares all her secrets in her new book, The Great American Supper Swap.
Thanks for being here, today, Trish.
I wanted to begin by asking you what IS supper swapping?
Supper swapping is really a simple solution to that ever present "What's for dinner," question that hits most moms at 4:30 every afternoon.
Its moms helping moms by sharing the cooking responsibility for their families by cooking in bulk then swapping meals during the workweek.
And how did you become a supper swap mom?
First of all, I'm a wife and mother of 4 kids all under 12, and so life at our house is pretty chaotic most days. I'm just like all the moms out there struggling with my daily to-do list, and dinner was just one more thing stressing me out.
So, four years ago when one of my girlfriends asked if I wanted to try swapping suppers with her and two other gals to simplify dinner, I gave it a try. I had no idea how much supper swapping would bless my life, or that God would lead me to write this book and help other families as well.
That sounds great. But how exactly does supper swapping work?
One great thing about supper swapping is that it can be adapted to meet the needs of the families in the group. No two supper swapping groups have to look alike.
Basically, women join with 1-4 other women to form a supper swapping group. Each mom chooses one weekday to do the cooking for everyone in the group. The rest of the week, dinner is delivered to their door, hot fresh, and ready to enjoy with their family.
You only have to cook ONE night a week and the other nights, you essentially get free meals catered to your door? Wow! With so many other dinner options out there, why do you think supper swapping is becoming a hot trend?
Basically because moms need help. Today families run at a fast pace unheard of 30 years ago. Usually, dinner is a fast food, on the go grab bag, or relegated to pizza, take out or frozen quick fix meals. These meals are unhealthy and expensive.
Studies have shown that women today still do most of the cooking. Just looking at the workweek, that's 5 dinners a week, 260 dinners a year. Whew! No wonder we're all tired of cooking and settling for grilled cheese, pizza or take out.
Supper swapping cuts a moms cooking by up to 80% since she only cooks one day a week.
For about 1-2 hours of meal preparation and 15-30 minutes or less of meal delivery one day a week, you get a week's worth of hot, fresh, homemade dinners.
Eating dinner together as a family has got to be a better way than going through drive-thrus for fast food on the run. Speaking for myself, I know I could probably make an entire Happy Meal out of the food on the floor of my van.
Eating dinner together as a family opens communication, helps children to eat healthier, feel more connected to their parents, feel loved and cherished. These benefits have a lifelong impact on our children.
According to research from Columbia University, children who eat dinner with their family on a regular basis are 60% less likely to smoke cigarettes, 50% less likely to use drugs, and 66% less likely to drink alcohol.
If a mom wants to start supper swapping, where can she get more information?
There is a ton of how to information, delicious recipes, encouragement and support in my book The Great American Supper Swap, available at bookstores and online at amazon.com and christinabooks.com, or contact me via my website for a signed copy.
What do you hope families gain from supper swapping?
Supper swapping can save families $4000 a year or more, reduces a moms cooking by 80%, adds deeper faith and friendships, and helps families eat healthier food.
BUT MOST OF ALL – I want families to gather back around their dinner table each and every day. That is my passion. A return to the family meal.
Though I'm an avid supper swap mom, each family must find what works for them and re-claim their family dinner however they can. Supper swapping is just one simple tool to help moms make that happen.
But if you're stuck in a rut singing the dinnertime blues, ask a couple girlfriends to give supper swapping a try.
When it comes to dinner - DON'T GIVE UP. DON'T GIVE IN. JUST GET SWAPPING!
The family meal has a lifelong impact on our kids!
For more information on The Great American Supper Swap or Trish Berg, go to http://www.trishberg.com/.
Remember, when you leave a comment, be sure to include your name and email address so we can notify the winners!
Someone Owes me a Whole Lotta Backpay!
Someone recently emailed me an article about stay-at-home-moms. The article stated that if stay-at-home-moms were paid for all that they do, their yearly salaries would amount to $131,471. Wow! Could you imagine bringing in a six figure income for changing diapers? Not that I don't love being paid in dirty laundry, messy bathrooms, dandelion bouquets, and sloppy kisses, but seriously - six figures!
I believe the writer of that article estimated a stay-at-home-mom's salary based on the idea that she was caring for one child. I have six children - well, seven if you count my husband. I think that would bump my salary up a bit. Besides being the cook, chauffeur, day care teacher, maid, nurse, general maintenance worker, tutor, shopper, boo-boo kisser, errand runner, project manager, accountant, bug squisher, and laundry doer (I have no idea what you call someone who does laundry. Other than MOM, that is), I am a Sunday school teacher and a brownie leader. That's got to worth a little bonus, I imagine.
I think we should be getting tips on a daily basis as well. I can't tell you how many times I've picked the kids up from school, only to have my children thrust their backpacks at me whining, "This is too heavy. Will you carry it?"
"Well, my darling child, that would make me a bellhop and I believe the going rate is $2 a bag."
"Oh you want me to make you a snack? No problem. I'll play waitress. You can just tip me 20% of your bill."
And this is no ordinary 9 to 5 job. We're on call 24 hours a day, 365 days a year. We get no sick time, vacation time, or personal days.
My husband doesn't understand this. Now I'm not saying the grass is any greener where he stands. He works a lot of hours only to come home and hear me complain that he's never home. When he's here I complain that we don't have enough money to pay our bills. The poor guy's stuck between a rock and well, me. But the thing he doesn't fully understand is that although he works a ton, he gets a paycheck at the end of the week. He gets an evaluation every year where he's patted on the back for a job well done. He gets kudos on his handiwork on a regular basis. It's nice to get positive feedback for the hours you put into your work.
I have yet to hear my children say, "You're doing an awesome job, Mom! Keep up the good work!" or, "Wow Mom! This laundry smells so clean!" or, "If you keep this up, you'll be getting a raise!" And the phrase, " Amazing! I've never seen the toilet sparkle so!" surprisingly enough, has never been uttered in my house. Although I know I'm doing an important job, it's nice to be told so once every ten years or so. From now on, when I'm feeling useless, I'm going to remember that I'm really earning a six figure salary, but opting to take payment in kisses.
I don't think moms who work outside the house have it any better either. They have to go put in their 40 hours a week and then come home and do all the "mom jobs" too. So, to ALL the underappreciated, overworked moms out there - "You're doing an awesome job! Keep up the good work and if you're lucky, some day you may just get a promotion to the position of Grandmother!"
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Oops - I have to add an addendum here. The Teletubby pictures were courtesy of my husband and my husband alone. My boys did not, I repeat did NOT turn themselves into Teletubbies. I was misinformed last night when I wrote that post. My husband doing that makes much more sense to me. I couldn't imagine my boys doing something like that. I could see them putting their faces on Star Wars characters and then drawing a background of lightsabers and decapitated heads covered in blood perhaps, but definitely not Teletubbies. Just had to clear that up.
Friday, September 14, 2007
What Were we Talking About?
Now I really enjoy these drama meetings because there are such fun people involved in the group. I spend most of the evening laughing and laughing and trying not to wet my pants and laughing. This evening, as happens at most of our meetings, the conversation steered toward other topics. Politics, specifically. This is the part of the evening where my eyes glaze over, not because I'm bored with the talk, but because I can't add anything meaningful to the discussion. I admit I've never been terribly interested in current events, but I used to have a clue what was going on in the world around me.
I'm not sure when and how it happened, but somewhere along the line, I became stupid. Yes, yes I know, I'm not really stupid, but when you're in a room full of people who can easily converse on any given topic and you can only chime in if the discussion turns to diaper changing, the best way to scrub pudding off the ceiling, or the latest Backyardigans adventure, you start to feel a little less than intelligent.
I sat there catching bits and pieces of the conversation....taxes......budget.....governor......nine months. My ears perked up! Nine months? I know something about that! Oh wait. They're not talking about pregnancy. They're still on budgets.....administration.....funding. Nope, not a single word about math homework, laundry, or petrified food found in strange areas of the house.
Now don't get me wrong. I know I could take the time to read the paper, watch the news, and study up on current events and politics. I choose not to. I know I'd be prepared to talk about television if I spent time watching the latest reality t.v. show, but let's face it, I get enough reality right here at home. So I sit there and pretend to be just absorbing everything they say with a thoughtful look on my face. Oh well. I guess no one can be totally involved in every conversation, right? We all have different areas of expertise and just because we can't converse on any subject under the sun, doesn't make us stupid. Although.... speaking of stupid... I've had many, many people ask me if I'm LDS. I had no idea why so many people were asking me if I was learning disabled. Apparently LDS does not stand for learning disabled. Who knew? And no, I'm not Mormon. I'm a United Methodist who took a while to figure out the whole birth control thing. :D And I'm glad I did take a while!
Oh yes, no chance to get out of the house by oneself would be complete without an explanation of what they found upon returning home.
Thursday, September 13, 2007
The Social Skills of a Chimpanzee
He's such a trooper. He ate two cups of Jello and drank some water at the hospital and took his pain meds without a fight so they actually let us go home yesterday evening. The nurse asked Clay, "Are you ready to leave?" He shook his head 'no'. "Don't you want to go home?" Again, he nodded his head from side to side.
Can you blame the kid? Here he was getting to watch t.v. IN BED! People brought him Jello, popsicles, soup, pop, juice, and water that he got to eat IN BED! It was quiet there. He had mom to himself and no siblings were bugging him. No kidding he didn't want to leave. I, on the other hand, did want to leave because I'm now sick and running a fever. I just pray I don't give it to Clay. That's just what he needs on top of recovering from surgery.
He's been pretty much laying around all day today which is good. Well, except for a brief moment this morning when he hopped into the kitchen. I told him, "No hopping Sweetie. You need to lie down and rest, " to which he asked, "Can I walk on my toes then?"
He's doing much better than I did when I had my tonsils removed at 19 years old. I whined to my Mom, at the time, that this was the worst pain EVER. Two days later, I got a kidney stone which promptly changed my mind. Throat pain? What throat pain?
There was nothing funny to write about in the hospital. Although this was the 8th surgery between my kids, it doesn't get easier. It's still nerve-wracking. But having this surgery in a big children's hospital, I saw so many really sick children. I thank God that mine are really healthy.
But since I told you I'd post a story, here's something I wrote a few days ago....
I recently read an article which stated that toddlers are smarter than chimpanzees. The article went on to cite studies that claim the social learning skills of a two year old child are superior to those of an ape. The person who conducted these studies has obviously never met my children.
Let's talk a little about these five social skills that a toddler could be expected to demonstrate.
1. Saying "Please" and "Thank you" - Your toddler should always remember the magic words - please and thank you. My children are actually pretty good with their Ps and Qs. "Please, please, please can I have a piece of candy?" "Pleeeeease can I just have one more glass of water, goodnight kiss, or story?" "Thank you for letting me bring twenty-two worms in the house." And finally, "Thank you for letting me wear my Batman mask to the grocery store."
Yes, they've covered the ground on please and thank you.
2. Introductions - When introduced to an adult, your toddler should be able to say, "Nice to meet you." My toddler hasn't quite gotten to that point yet. I usually hear something more like "Hello. You look like Santa Claus", or "Hello. Why is there hair coming out of your nose?", or my personal favorite, "Hi. Are you going to have a baby soon?" Yep, that's social finesse at its finest. Shaking hands during introductions or greetings is another opportunity to teach toddlers good manners. Greeters stand at the door as we walk into church, waiting to shake our hands. My toddler usually looks at his feet and tries to hide behind me. Sometimes he'll be in an outgoing mood and perfectly willing to shake the other adult's hand, but having seen him lick his palm, wipe at his nose and cough into his hand on the way into the building, I quickly usher him along before he can pass the grossness on to some unsuspecting person.
I think that covers introductions for toddlers.
3. Sharing - It's important to teach your toddler to share. My children do an exceptional job when it comes to sharing. They are happy to share blame. To the question, "Who broke the picture frame?" all six will reply, "They did it!" while simultaneously pointing to the sibling on their left. They're also wonderful at sharing germs, bacteria and viruses. If one gets sick, they make sure they share until all six of them get sick.
More generous, giving children, you'll never meet.
4. Table Manners - Right from the start, you must show your toddler how to behave at the dinner table. I never have to worry about my children's table manners in public. Honestly. We simply never go out to eat. At home, well, let's just say that not a meal goes by where we aren't graced by some charming bodily function followed by hilarious laughter. Generally, enough food to feed a small village winds up on the floor and the phrase, "This is yucky" is uttered at least twice a week.
Perhaps they could use a little work in this department.
5. Saying you're sorry - Teaching your toddler to own up to their mistakes and offer an apology when they've wronged someone is essential.
"I'm sorry I put my sister in the clothes dryer, I'm sorry I squished Play Doh in the couch cushions, and I'm sorry for using your expensive lipstick to color on the wall," are all good examples of this lesson.
Yep, I've heard them all.
The researchers of this study go on to state that children could understand nonverbal communication, understand the intentions of others, and imitate other's solutions to problems better than chimpanzees and orangutans. I'm inclined to agree with them.
1. …could understand nonverbal communication - They understand what that look means. You know, the'Wait Until we get Home Mister' look that we give our children when they're misbehaving.
2. …could understand the intentions of others - They understand perfectly what their older brother's intentions are. "Mom, I messed up Austin's room and now he's going to kill me!"
3. …could imitate other's solutions to problem solving - "Well, he hit me first, so I hit him back."
Actually I think it's a toss up on who has better social skills, a chimpanzee or a two year old. But I'm pretty sure a chimp has never flushed a Barbie doll down the toilet, painted a television with chocolate pudding, or given their little sister a haircut with a pair of kitchen shears. Of course, I don't know too many adults who walk around doing those things either, so I guess eventually, they can be taught the finer art of social graces and in the meantime, they sure provide us with plenty of fun.
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Oh yes, many of you commented that my kids sure like yogurt as a medium in their, um "artwork". I'd never really noticed that before, but you're right! And you know what? I cannot stand yogurt. You couldn't pay me to eat that nasty stuff!
Tuesday, September 11, 2007
A Bunch of Random Stuff
.....plastic fish
Just for your information. I found a city named Bob in Louisiana. So even though it would sound out of place in your list of names, it would continue your theme.


text:
Emma Watson
Born: April 15, 1990 Birthplace: Paris, France | Alexis Neiers
Born: June 20, 1991 Birthplace: Los Angeles, California, USA |
Katie Chang
Birthplace: Chicago, Illinois, USA | Rachel Jungeon Lee
Israel Broussard
Born: August 22, 1994 Birthplace: Gulfport, Mississippi, USA | Nicholas Prugo
Born: November 30, 1990 Birthplace: Los Angeles, California, USA (wearing Orlando Bloom's stolen striped shirt in his mugshot) |
Taissa Farmiga
Born: August 17, 1994 Birthplace: Clifton, New Jersey, USA | Tess Taylor
Born: February 11, 1990 Birthplace: California, USA |
Claire Julien
Born: January 11, 1995 | Courtney Ames
Born: November 14, 1990 Birthplace: Los Angeles, California, USA |
Georgia Rock
| Gabby Neiers
Born: January 25, 1994 Birthplace: Los Angeles, California, USA |
Leslie Mann
Born: March 26, 1972 Birthplace: San Francisco, California, USA | Andrea Arlington
Born: August 15, 1964 |
Gavin Rossdale
Born: October 30, 1965 Birthplace: Kilburn, London, England, UK | Jonathan Ajar, a.k.a. "Jonnie Dangerous"
Born: March 31, 1982 Birthplace: Los Angeles, California, USA |
The real Bling Ring stole high-end handbags, jewelry (including Rolexes), designer clothes, shoes, perfume, makeup, art and underwear, among other things. Their nine month haul totaled more than $3 million. See the list of celebrities below for more details on each burglary and the items that were taken. -Good Morning America
Yes, the real people behind The Bling Ring movie robbed the homes of Paris Hilton; Lindsay Lohan; Orlando Bloom and Miranda Kerr; Brian Austin Green and Megan Fox; Rachel Bilson; and Audrina Patridge.
Below we list each celebrity, the various items that were stolen, and the total value of the items that were taken, when available: | ||
Paris Hilton: Nick Prugo and Rachel Lee first robbed hotel heiress Paris Hilton's home in October 2008. They entered the home after finding a key under the mat. They took few enough items so that the robbery would go unnoticed. This strategy allowed them to return four more times, with Paris Hilton finally reporting a burglary on December 19, 2008 after an accomplice, Roy Lopez, stole nearly $2 million worth of her jewelry. Other items the Bling Ring stole from Paris Hilton include Birkin bags, heirloom jewelry, expensive bras, a designer dress and topless photos of the heiress that were snatched out of an open safe. Nick Prugo told author Nancy Jo Sales that they also snorted cocaine they found in Paris's house, a claim that Dawn Miller, a rep for Hilton, denies. | ||
Lindsay Lohan: On the night of August 23, 2009, Nick Prugo, Rachel Lee and Diana Tamayo allegedly robbed Lindsay Lohan's Spanish-style home in the Hollywood Hills. They made off with nearly $130,000 in jewelry and clothes. Prugo says that Lindsay was Rachel Lee's fashion icon. Police recovered a coat believed to be Lohan's at Rachel Lee's father's home. A Chanel necklace belonging to Lohan was also recovered by police at the home of Alexis Neiers's. | ||
Orlando Bloom: On July 13, 2009, the Hollywood Hills Burglar Bunch, including Alexis Neiers, Rachel Lee, Nick Prugo and Diana Tamayo, cut a hole in the chain-link fence surrounding Bloom's property and entered his house through an unlocked door near the pool. They stole roughly $500,000 in clothing, Louis Vuitton luggage, Rolex watches and artwork. When Nick Prugo was arrested he was wearing Orlando Bloom's black and white striped shirt (see mugshot above). | ||
Miranda Kerr: Victoria Secret model Miranda Kerr was living with then boyfriend Orlando Bloom (they later married) at the time of the July 13, 2009 break-in. Some of the $500,000 worth of items that were taken from his mansion belonged to her. Nick Prugo is quoted in Nancy Jo Sales article as saying that fellow Bling Ringer Rachel Lee "wanted Victoria's Secret model clothes" and that Alexis Neiers took a one-of-a-kind runway style dress by Alex Perry. | ||
Brian Austin Green: In addition to their normal items, in August 2009 the Bling Ring stole the former Beverly Hills 90210 star's Sig Sauer .380 semi-automatic handgun. However, they were really after property belonging to his then live-in girlfriend Megan Fox (they later married). | ||
Megan Fox: In the Nancy Jo Sales Vanity Fair article, Nick Prugo said that his accomplice Rachel Lee wanted to rob Transformers star Megan Fox because Lee liked her wardrobe. Fox was living at the home of her boyfriend, actor Brian Austin Green, at the time. | ||
Rachel Bilson: Nick Prugo and Rachel Lee were two of the teens involved in burglarizing the home of former O.C. star Rachel Bilson on May 9, 2009. Prugo says that Lee was so comfortable that she took time to move her bowels in Bilson's bathroom. Among the items stolen from Bilson was a Marc Jacobs handbag, which ended up being recovered by police at Alexis Neiers's home while the taping of an episode of her reality show Pretty Wild was under way. According to the L.A.P.D., during April and May of 2009, the Bling Ring collectively burglarized Rachel Bilson's home a total of six times, taking almost $130,000 worth of property that included clothing, handbags, makeup and jewelry. | ||
Audrina Patridge: A male and a female resembling Nick Prugo and Rachel Lee were caught on surveillance cameras entering Patridge's home on Oscar night, February 22, 2009. They stole an estimated $43,000 worth of property, including Audrina's great-grandma's jewelry, her laptop, her passport and custom made jeans. "Rachel Lee was a big fan of me," Patridge says, having been told by the police. "She's a little obsessed girl, I gotta tell you. She's going to get what she deserves." |
The fame and fashion obsessed teens used the internet, including Google, TMZ and celebrity Twitter accounts, to learn when the stars would be home. They also used Google Earth to study aerial photos of the celebrity homes to determine the best points of entry. They picked their victims in part based on who they liked and also on their wardrobes and intelligence. For example, according to Nick Prugo, who was quoted in Nancy Jo Sales's Bling Ring book, they thought that Paris Hilton was "dumb" and when they got to her house they found a key under the mat. They robbed her a total of five times. -Good Morning America
The Bling Ring true story reveals that the teens were identified after several of them were caught on surveillance cameras outside of two celebrity mansions, the home of Audrina Patridge (one of the former stars of MTV's The Hills) and Lindsay Lohan's Spanish-style residence. On August 26, 2009, after seeing that both videos had captured the same people, the L.A.P.D. released Lohan's video to the celebrity gossip website TMZ (Patridge had already posted her home's surveillance video publicly on YouTube). Tips rolled in but police were already acting on information they had obtained from someone who overheard Nick Prugo and Rachel Lee bragging about their exploits at a party.
Yes. This quote was plucked straight from author Nancy Jo Sales Vanity Fair article, which took it straight from the L.A.P.D. report. According to the report, Rachel Lee asked L.A.P.D. Detective Leanne Hoffman if she had spoken to any of the victims. When the detective told Lee that she had talked to all of the victims, Lee grew excited and asked, "What did Lindsay say?"
Yes, but it wasn't due to her association with the Hollywood Hills Burglar Bunch. The real Nicki, Alexis Neiers, had already been cast to star on the E! Television Network's reality TV show Pretty Wild, which was supposed to chronicle the lives of her and her two sisters, Gabby and Tess (Tess Taylor was not a biological sister but rather a friend of Alexis's that the family took in), as they navigated the Hollywood social scene and attempted to develop their modeling careers. After the pilot had already been filmed in the summer of 2009, Alexis was arrested for her involvement in the burglaries. The plot of the show then deviated to in part follow Alexis's trial. The show only lasted one season.
Yes. In the movie, Nicki's (Emma Watson) mom Laurie (Leslie Mann) calls upstairs to let her daughters know that it's time for their Adderall (a drug used to treat narcolepsy and attention deficit hyperactivity disorder, commonly referred to as ADHD). This moment was inspired by a scene from the Pretty Wild reality TV show where Alexis's mom brags about giving all three of her daughters Adderall each morning for attention deficit problems.
On the show, Alexis's mom also gave her Adderall for "stress" prior to entering court for her preliminary hearing. Via a video posted on her official blog, Alexis admits that her daily use of Adderall was not a good idea. This realization came after she was arrested for possession of a controlled substance (not Adderall) and subsequently went to rehab.
"I watched a lot of reality TV and material with Kim Kardashian and Paris Hilton and some of the girls from The Hills," says Emma, "and gradually put together this picture of who Nicki was and what her psychology was like." -Mirror.co.uk
Yes, according to Nancy Jo Sales Vanity Fair article, the real Nicki from The Bling Ring movie, Alexis Neiers, was quoted saying this a week prior to her arraignment. She was at her lawyer's office. "I'm a firm believer in Karma," Alexis said, "and I think this situation was attracted into my life because it was supposed to be a huge learning lesson for me to grow and expand as a spiritual human being. I see myself being like an Angelina Jolie, but even stronger, pushing even harder for the universe and for peace and for the health of our planet. God didn't give me these talents and looks to just sit around being a model or being famous. I want to lead a huge charity organization. I want to lead a country, for all I know."
Yes. Hotel heiress and Hollywood socialite Paris Hilton granted director Sofia Coppola and the filmmakers access inside her sprawling Hollywood mansion to shoot the scenes for the movie. "I saw the pillows adorned with [Paris'] face and I took my picture with them," says director Coppola.
"Those pillows with my face on it were actually a present from my girlfriend for my birthday," remarked Hilton, "and I just thought they were so funny and hilarious." -UsMagazine.com
After their capture, the majority of the Bling Ring real people began to snitch on each other in an attempt to get off with a reduced sentence or none at all. Three of them, Courtney Ames, Diana Tamayo and Roy Lopez, Jr., received lighter sentences because detective Brett Goodkin took a job as a consultant to director Sophia Coppola without getting permission from his superiors. This caused a conflict when it came to the credibility of his testimony in the trial. Below we list each member and their punishment:
Watch interviews with the Bling Ring real people, including Nick Prugo, and witness Alexis Neiers lash out at author Nancy Jo Sales. View the surveillance video from the homes of Lindsay Lohan and Audrina Patridge, which was used to help identify the suspects. Also, watch the movie trailer for the Sophia Coppola film.
WATCH Alexis Neiers Lashes Out at Nancy Jo SalesOn the reality TV show Pretty
Wild, Alexis Neiers (the real life
Nicki from The Bling Ring movie)
expresses her outrage over how she is
portrayed in Nancy Jo Sales's Vanity
Fair article by leaving the author
several emotional voicemails. |
WATCH Real Bling Ring Member Nick Prugo SpeaksFormer Bling Ring member Nick Prugo (Marc
in the Sophia Coppola movie) is
interviewed and says, "I'm definitely
sorry for what I've done." He claims that
peer pressure and the thrill of it is what
made him take part in the burglaries. He
admits that they started by robbing cars
and smaller things before celebrity homes. |
WATCH Audrina Patridge Surveillance VideoThis video of Bling Ring members Nick
Prugo and Rachel Lee was captured by
Audrina Patridge's surveillance cameras on
Oscar night, February 22, 2009. Prugo and
Lee made off with approximately $43,000
worth of items from Audrina's home. |
WATCH Lindsay Lohan Surveillance VideoView the Lindsay Lohan surveillance video
that the L.A.P.D. released on August 26,
2009 so that the public could help to
identify the suspects. The video shows
three individuals covering their faces
with a hat and hoods as they move around
near an outside door. |
WATCH The Bling Ring TrailerSophia Coppola directs Emma Watson in
The Bling Ring, based on the true
story of the Hollywood Hills Burglar
Bunch, a group of teens who robbed the
homes of various Hollywood celebrities,
including Paris Hilton, Lindsay Lohan and
Orlando Bloom. |

subset: commoncrawl


text:
May 5, 2014
Craig Unger retires from Housing Works Board of Commissioners
Redmond, OR –Following more than 17 years of service on the Housing Works Board of Commissioners, Craig Unger has retired from the Board effective April 30.
Housing Works Executive Director Tom Kemper said "Unger has been a tireless advocate for low-income families in our community. Unger was constantly seeking out innovative strategies to help alleviate poverty in the most vulnerable populations. After 17 years of service, we wish him well in in his retirement from the board and thank him for all the work he has done to ensure that the mission of 'fostering dignity through housing' was at the forefront of our minds. We will greatly miss his dedication to the folks that Housing Works serves."
Unger, a retired Redmond police officer, also retired as a Director of the Board of Directors of Families Forward, a nonprofit affiliate of Housing Works providing resident services to Housing Works residents. Unger was devoted to helping low income families in Central Oregon and served as President of the Families Forward Board. During Unger's tenure as a Commissioner of the Housing Works Board, the authority increased its housing portfolio by 200% and greatly expanded its voucher and resident services programs. Unger has agreed to continue his role as a hearings officer for Housing Works when controversies arise under the voucher program.
Housing Works is the largest affordable housing provider in Central Oregon. It provides people with quality, safe and affordable homes; and through a number of collaborations, it provides the resources to help people stabilize their lives. Housing Works obtains public funding from federal, state and local governments and leverages these funds with private capital from local financial institutions and foundations to provide quality housing that meets communities' needs.
Housing Works developments in Bend, Redmond, Prineville, Madras and Sisters have won awards for innovation, economic impact, design, beautification, and historic preservation and enhancement. For more information, visit www.housing-works.org.


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Friday, January 14, 2005
XML + ASN.1 = faster? (or Stones Don't Float)
Do you ever have an idea, then somebody else has the same idea, but they screw it up? Well, I just had that happen to me. I stumbled on this article on Fast Infoset today. Fast Infoset is a specification for a binary version of XML. I had this same idea a couple of years ago, and the execution is amazingly similar, but, of course, they screwed it up.
Essentially, everybody is finally realizing that while XML is the first widely accepted data markup format, it's a pig. It's verbose and redundant, which makes it store poorly, transmit slowly, and parse, well, like a pig. Don't get me wrong, the original idea for XML was actually fine, but everybody has taken it way over the top and things like SOAP are just an abomination.
Well, one way to help XML while still retaining XML semantics is to make a binary version of it. While a compression program like gzip can reduce the overall transfer and storage size of an XML document, an XML parser still has to deal with the XML textual format on either end of a transfer. The textual format forces the decoder to examine each and every byte to determine its significance in the document, even when a decoder doesn't understand vast expanses of the XML schema that is being parsed. And that textual XML format actually expands binary data carried in an XML document by forcing it into BASE64 format which does a 3-goes-to-4 encoding.
So, my idea, and that of Fast Infoset, is to notice that most XML documents are extremely redundant with tag and attribute information. First, you have all those < and > symbols surrounding every tag. That's four bytes of redundant info for every opening and closing tag pair. Then you have the tag name itself, which gets repeated at least twice, once in the opening tag and once in the closing tag. Then, you have the fact that many XML documents are recursive tree structures where nodes at any given level of the hierarchy share a lot of the same type of info. For instance, an XML document storing a list of books would use TITLE, AUTHOR, and ISBN tags for each book. Add in namespace prefixes and attributes and you have a lot of redundancy, even before you start talking about SOAP. In short, the information density of your average XML document has Claude Shannon spinning in his grave.
Luckily, it's pretty easy to compress this information right out of an XML document. You simply create a tag/attribute hash table and assign each unique tag or attribute in the document a unique number. Rather than writing TITLE everywhere, you would instead use the number 0; 1 for AUTHOR; 2 for ISBN; and so on. So, rather than "<AUTHOR>" (8 bytes), we would simply have 0x0001 or something (2 - 4 bytes). By eliminating the end tag and encoding the content inside the AUTHOR tag with a 4-byte length, we have a net savings of 8 + 9 - 2 - 4 = 11 bytes every time we would otherwise use an AUTHOR tag. Do the same thing for all the other tags in your document and it adds up pretty quickly. Finally, by encoding binary data as binary octets, rather than BASE64, we eliminate the "ASCII tax" imposed by a textual format on binary data.
The interesting thing is that we still fundamentally have an XML document. This means that you can run this new format through a SAX-like or DOM-like decoder and produce exactly the same data that an XML-based application expects, and the application is none-the-wiser. Everything is just smaller and faster. Because the binary format parser doesn't have to actually look at the characters that make up all these tags and try to match them with other strings, it can whip through a document at light speed.
So, that was my theory. I even had a catchy name for it, BCX: Binary Coded XML.
Along comes Fast Infoset. Great minds think alike. Obviously, the need is there. Only they screwed it up. Rather than just keeping things simple, they decided to encode the whole thing in ASN.1 with packed encoding rules (ASN.1/PER). Now, for those of you who don't know, ASN.1 is about the most complex, worst, ugly data format ever designed. And it's no wonder, it was created by an international committee (ISO) as part of the Open Systems Interconnect protocols (OSI; anybody remember FTAM?). The various encoding rules used to actually serialize ASN.1 (and there are several, which is part of the problem) typically do a lot of bit-twiddling, which slows down encoder/decoders. It also makes them buggy. Anybody remember some of the recent buffer overruns attributed to ASN.1 endecs?
Well, it looks like Fast Infoset is being standardized in ISO (in fact, jointly with ISO/IEC JTC 1 and ITU-T, which is about as ugly as it gets in the international standards committee world), so they probably had to use ASN.1 or people would wonder why they weren't supporting their own standards. ASN.1 is used by a couple of protocols in common use today, including SNMP, X.509, and LDAP. That said, most IETF-originated protocols (you know, the ones that move all your web, ftp, email, etc., traffic around) use either straightforward text encodings, or far more simple binary encodings.
Fast Infoset does manage to get pretty good compression (20% - 80% reduction, depending on document size and content). Throughput for some documents is 2 - 3 times what standard XML delivers. Overall, these are good numbers.
But, it could have been even faster. Frankly, I'm partial to Sun's old XDR format, used by ONC-RPC and NFS, which was very fast, if not quite as tightly packed as some other formats. I was also recently reading about Joe Armstrong's Universal Binary Format (UBF), created to give Erlang a streamlined wire protocol.
In short, marrying XML and ASN.1/PER is like tying two stones together and hoping they will float.
How does WBXML fit into this picture? I don't know details but I know it's used for example by some cell phones to transfer SyncML data and there are libraries which can read and write WBXML directly without converting it to XML.
You'll be amused to know that ASN.1 has another set of encoding rules, called XER.
That's right -- ASN.1 encoded in XML.
Anyway, ASN.1/PER isn't that bad, actually. What sucks about it is the terrible syntax of the format specifications themselves. They would have been easier to handle if written as S expressions, or even XML.
I'd like a lisp parser generator that can handle the ASN.1 grammar. Zebu doesn't cut it. An ANTLR clone, maybe?
The thing to note is that XML was successful because it is similar to HTML. HTML was successful because it was simple and human-readable. (These are simplifications, but I think both were pre-requisite for the success of HTML and XML).
A binary format is not simple and is not human-readable. I think that XML often gets used for the wrong applications. Just because you can pass messages between threads using a simple, human-readable format, doesn't mean that you should.
I think there are two solutions to the problem of XML's verbosity and redundancy:
1) Standard, tuned, application-specific protocols for tasks that XML is misapplied to. For example, I think we need a simple, lightweight, efficient inter-process communication protocol that is standardised, widely supported and possibly integrated into new languages and VMs. I'm not talking about about a new designed-by-huge-committee version of CORBA.
2. Where XML *must* be used, there should be standardised, platform-based support for the interchange of XML documents. For example, if I am transmitting XML over a network, the system should be able to know that this is XML data (e.g. the programmer could tell it), and should be able to decide for itself that the XML should be compressed (because spending compression time vs the network speed and latency is likely to be a net win for this particular document). When the XML arrives at the other end, the system should be able to inflate the data in a sensible way. E.g. perhaps the application could use the compressed XML directly; perhaps the user is viewing it with Notepad, so it must be uncompressed. The system should take care of these cases, and the raw XML should be human-readable when it is needed. The compression/decompression process should be transparent to both programmer and user.
"The thing to note is that XML was successful because it is similar to HTML."
I think it's too early to say that XML has been successful, and certainly too early to put it in past tense! For now, a large number of people are using XML in some capacity in new projects, mostly web pages, but don't forget that the vast majority of the web is still (and will continue to be for some time to come) in various versions of HTML. I think some of the people using it for non-web things will stop doing so - for most of them the disadvantages and changes necessitated by XML outweigh the perceived advantages. My take is the only place XML will have a lasting impact like HTML has is on the web.
The overrun bugs are bugs in the implementation of the Packed Encoding Rules (PER). They are not due to any flaws in the specification. I don't know much about the PER. I do know that the performance issues with the BASIC Encoding Rules (BER) were pretty bad in the early 90s. Improved algorithms changed this in the mid 90s.
-reilly hayes
The article you refer to was written at an early stage of the development of the Fast Infoset standard (X.891). The current draft of the standard does not use PER at all. The standard uses ASN.1 and ECN as the formal notation for specifying data structures, but the actual encodings are "customized" and heavily optimized for speed, ease of implementation, and compactness.
One can implement the Fast Infoset standard without possessing a deep knowledge of ASN.1, and can certainly implement it without knowing ECN at all, because the standard contains an annex that describes the encodings in full detail. PER is not used, as I said.
I am sorry if you have been misled by an outdated article. As soon as the standard is approved, it will be made available for free on the ITU-T website.
(Note that I am not related to Sun. My company (OSS Nokalva) and Sun are members of the ISO/IEC/ITU-T standards committee that is developing the Fast Infoset standard and the Fast Web Services standard.)
There is another Binary XML format with essentially the same ideas as you had. It's being pushed by a GIS (Geographic Information System?) company called CubeWerks and they've submitted it to some GIS consortium thingy.
Anyway It's appropriately is called BXML. They have a reference implementation, but it sort of sucks.
Gzip doesn't make things parse faster. In fact, it slows things down still further since after uncompressing you still have to parse the original XML. Gzip simply compresses the textual content. A binary-encoding of XML can make the parser faster and make the binary representation more dense.
Please. IETF protocols use all sorts of encodings, from text-ish encodings that have given implementors huge headaches (RFC821/822, anyone?), ad-hoc binary encodings (SSHv2) to XDR (NFS), ASN.1/BER/DER (Kerberos V, PKIX, and so on), to XML, things built atop XML (BEEP), and what not. There have been serious implementation bugs with most if not all of these. PER is, IMO, a fairly simple encoding. What makes ASN.1 difficult to deal with is its syntax, which makes writing compilers for it fairly painful, thus the dearth of open source compilers for it; the encodings are not all that special (think of XDR as PER-like + 4-octet alignment and minus a few features).
All of these things are bad re-inventions of the S-expression, in a way. So having re-invented the wheel for the umpteenth time with XML, why re-invent the wheel again when the time came to make an efficient encoding of XML? Why not pick an existing spec?
That ASN.1 and XML can map onto each other (XER = ASN.1->XML, Fast InfoSet = XML-> ASN.1/PER) is an indictment of our propensity to re-invent the wheel, out of ignorance or worse. A lot of thought and experience went into PER, so why should the authors of Fast InfoSet throw that out the window?
Finally, just because Fast InfoSet uses PER as the encoding and ASN.1 for its semantic mapping model doesn't necessarily mean that implementations must internally deal with ASN.1 syntax.
Probably not one for the ASN.1 purists out there but if you are interested in a simple s-expression based encoding tool check out packedobjects.com
Very much work in progress but:
- is meant to fit somewhere in between hand encoding and more formal tools
- based on unaligned PER
- very simple API
- runs on many Unix platforms including embedded Linux
- Scheme based so can run from an interpreter
- free
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The director of the Massachusetts Highway Safety Division has a bad driving that includes seven accidents, four speeding violations and one failure to wear a seatbelt.
The Boston Globe reports that Sheila Burgess has 34 entries on her driving record since 1982.
Burgess has been on leave since she suffered a head injury in a one-car crash in Milton in August. She told police she swerved off the road to avoid an oncoming vehicle and wasn't cited.
Burgess declined to answer detailed questions about the accident and her $87,000-a-year job.
Officials in Gov. Deval Patrick's administration said Burgess was hired partly based on the recommendation of Congressman James McGovern, but could not address why she was given the highway safety job with the driving record she has.
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Google faces up to image problem in Europe
As Google bowed to a European court ruling to consider users' claims to remove embarrassing search results, the company took the first step toward preventing any more such punishing decisions—acknowledging it has an image problem in Europe.
The company was stunned in May when a court said it would have to accept Europeans' "right to be forgotten" online and field their requests to delete links to personal information in search results. It opened the doors to such applications on Friday, and took the opportunity to offer a new, humbler message to European authorities.
"I wish we'd been more involved in a real debate in Europe," Google CEO Larry Page said in remarks published by the Financial Times Friday. "That's one of the things we've taken from this, that we're starting the process of really going and talking to people."
Some would say Page's realization comes not a moment too soon.
The company, which since its early days has put a premium on keeping a positive image, has taken a beating in Europe in recent months. Its public relations machine seemed to run completely off the rails in May, when the European Court of Justice enshrined the 'right to be forgotten'—a concept Google had said amounted to censorship and which it had fought to undermine.
Criticism of Google's dominance in search —it enjoys a 90 percent market share in Europe—reached a fever pitch this year, with competing search engines and major publishers attacking the company, and even consumer rights groups piling on.
Politicians, perhaps smelling a shift in public attitude, began openly using the company as a punching bag. Shortly before European elections, German economic affairs minister Sigmar Gabriel criticized the company for its tax avoidance, privacy policies, and dominance, and suggested it might need to be broken up.
And in a development that should deeply concern a company whose motto is "Don't Be Evil," some European online freedoms groups are now identifying it as public enemy number one.
That has boosted the case for the European Commission, the EU's executive, to demand Google change the way it displays its search results to allow for greater competition. If the two can't reach a compromise deal, Google could face fines worth billions of dollars, as Microsoft did in the 2000s.
Anti-Google sentiment used to be an "edge phenomenon," said Hans de Zwart of Bits of Freedom, a Dutch digital rights group. "Now it's slowly moving toward the core," he said. "More and more people are feeling this."
Reasons for the company's fall from favor include products such as Google Glass that raise privacy concerns, as well as ripple effects from recent revelations about U.S. government spy programs.
Zwart said that fairly or not, Google has become directly linked to the National Security Agency in many Europeans' minds.
"Now we have a very clear argument for why it is a bad idea to store data in a centralized fashion with an American company," Zwart said.
"I think it's trivial for the NSA, if they know I have a Gmail account, to get all the data from it."
To comply with the court's May 12 ruling, Google announced Friday it has opened a digital hotline to let Europeans complain when links to embarrassing personal information about them turns up in a search of their names. The complaints will be vetted and removed unless a company-appointed panel says the public's right to access the information outweighs a complainant's right to privacy.
CEO Page told the FT the company is "trying now to be more European" and will think about privacy in "a more European context."
"A very significant amount of time is going to be spent in Europe talking," he said.
That means putting money where the company thinks more mouths should be.
Shortly after the ruling, Google posted a raft of help-wanted ads seeking "bright, well-organized and spirited individuals to work with a stellar team on cutting edge technology issues" at its offices in Berlin, Rome, London and Brussels.
The job? Lobbying.
"You will handle our various product agendas with policy makers inside and outside government," reads one ad in Berlin.
The company has room to expand efforts to get its view heard. Google employed seven lobbyists in Brussels in 2013, according to voluntary disclosure figures, and spent around 1.5 million euros (currently worth $2 million). By comparison, Microsoft employed 16 and spent 4.75 million euros.
In Washington D.C., Google outspent Microsoft $14 million to $10.5 million.
Mario Marinello, an economist at the European policy think-tank Bruegel, said he thinks Google can settle its antitrust case with the European Commission by arguing its search results are what consumers want, even if the company's competitors are frustrated by the company's dominance.
"I don't want to defend Google," he said. But "all this lobbying has kind of shifted the question to a very superficial level, which is dangerous."
For Google, it is not clear whether lobbying alone will be enough.
Activist Faith Bosworth of a German group known as Peng Collective said Google has been a media darling for too long.
"They've seen how others have gained a bad reputation, and until recently they've done a good job of avoiding those mistakes," she said.
"They've put money into supporting freedom of expression and been behind some really progressive things, but at the end of the day, they're a corporation seeking to make money," she said.
She said that while individually Google employees probably mean well, the company's business model relies on gathering ever-greater amounts of information.
As a result, Internet users should view Google with a critical eye.
"I think it will be very difficult to live up to 'Don't Be Evil'," she said.
© 2014 The Associated Press. All rights reserved.


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Los Angeles Day Trip: Chinatown
Why go now: Celebrate Chinese New Year by trying something new.
Main streets: Broadway and Hill Street Get the lay of the land: Download a free neighborhood map (angelswalkla.org/walks_china town.html). You'll see Bruce Lee's former studio and the Dynasty Center for designer knockoffs.
Brush up on local film lore: Watch Roman Polanski's Chinatown.
Get a fiery start to the year: Thousands of firecrackers will ward off evil spirits and signal the start of the Los Angeles Chinatown Firecracker Run (from $30; firecracker10k.org).
Discover a new favorite artist: Hit studios like the Happy Lion Gallery (closed Sun; 963 Chung King Rd.; thehappylion.com); China Art Objects (closed Sun; 933 Chung King; chinaartobjects. com); and Sister (closed Sun; 955 Chung King; sisterla.com).
More must-stop Chinatown eats
Get your Peking ducks in a row with a classic Chinese barbecue dinner at Hong Kong BBQ. Congee—a savory rice porridge—comes in at least a dozen incarnations. Also try hot pots in inventive combos like Cantonese beef stew and turnip. $; 803 N. Broadway; 213/687-7238.
Warm up at Via Cafe, where you can slurp a bowl of Vietnamese pho (pronounced "fuh") piled with bean sprouts, jalapenos, and basil. Assemble your own appetizers of fresh herbs, cucumbers, pickled veggies, and meat, shrimp, or tofu, and sweet-potato fritters. $; 415 Gin Ling Way, Ste. B; 213/617-1481.
Adventurous eaters should stop by Automat—a fast-food joint with vending machines full of international snacks rarely seen stateside. Anyone up for shrimp-flavored chips, instant corn salad, or Pocky's crisp, thin, chocolate-covered biscuit sticks? $; 936 Chung King Rd.; 213/617-0422.
Share your weekend finds. Favorite new restaurant? Local hike? Email your suggestions to the weekend guide editor at firstname.lastname@example.com
Ebbe Roe Yovino-Smith | From the February 2009 Issue