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One girl's twistedly fantastic interpretation of what the hell is really going on in those tribes.
Thursday, February 23, 2012
Quit Being Such A Dumb Broad
Once upon a time there was a candy factory run by a man with a low sperm count and a woman who spent her formative years inhaling glue. All that these two sweet-makers wanted in the whole wide world was a child. A lovely freckle-faced child to run up and down the candy aisles in flouncy dresses and pigtails in her hair. But as I said before, depleted swimmers and ovaries like raisins have made this dream all but impossible. Then one day the man had an idea. He looked around his warehouse of marshmallows, red vines, gummy bears, and lollipops and thought to himself, "Daggumit! I'll make me a daughter!" And so he toiled. Day and night for two whole weeks he stuck Gobstoppers to fondant, welded Raisinettes to Twix Bars, and stuffed caramel into hollowed out Tootsie Pops. His decades of candy making skills were challenged beyond anything he'd ever known, but in the end all of the hard work was worth it and the Kit Kat was born (Kat for short). Oh sure, her legs occasionally get stuck to the furniture and in the summer her brains (marshmallow and cotton candy) liquify and leak out of her Lifesaver ears, but she is a joy to be around and that's all that really matters, isn't it? Joy! Happiness and light, a smile you can count on. People who can read and add are a dime a dozen. The same cannot be said for a girl who poops M&M's. Let's recap, shall we?
We continue our Polynesian tale in the thick of night. The downtrodden girls with glum faces shuffle through the sand back to camp while the men, in capes and armor, stand watching over the fair maidens fire. "Just so you know, I totally watched your fire for you," says Michael. Kat's fruit roll-up face crinkles in objection, "But I'm the firestarter! Twisted firestarter!" And then her chocolate covered legs started to melt from standing too close to the fire that she didn't start or maintain so instead she pretended a bee was after her and ran away. With Kat off rolling around in coconut shavings, the women update the men on how Kourtney's ashes have been sprinkled into the ocean and how the Salami (Salani) tribe remains intact. Well, almost intact. There is still that little kerfluffle between Jugs (Alicia) and ChaCha (Christina) that needs clearing up. So through fake smiles and secret plots to drown one another, the two tentatively shake hands and vow to work together in a union of woman-ness and harmony. Meanwhile, far far away in a Parisian cemetery, through cobblestone streets and flickering streetlamps, Simone De Beauvoir's crackly old bones spun something fierce and blew stale dust as far as the eye could see. At that exact precise moment, Gloria Steinem felt a chill run through her body. She shook it off thinking nothing of it, but just you wait Gloria, just you wait...
Onto a new day. The sun is up, the air is crisp, and the ladies know that a good old fashioned sewing circle never hurt anyone. Well, except for Kat who has been sewing her fingers together for the past half hour. Anyhow, this crackerjack group of bluebirds needs a leader. Someone to guide them. Someone to say, "Kat, stop eating your toes!" That someone turns out to be Sabrina. They didn't actually vote and there was no election to speak of. Someone (perhaps the ghost of Kourtney) whispered the name Sabrina and that was that. With a long exasperated sigh Sabrina adjusts her shawl and headband and says, "A'ight. Fine. I guess I'm the leader then." It's not exactly Alice Paul leading the charge for women's suffrage, but it'll have to do for now.
The first order of business is to make a chore wheel. Monica will take care of the camp's water supply while Jugs and Kat will go foraging for food. Troop leader Sabrina advises Kat to observe the land first. Y'know, get to know her surroundings. Maybe place some markers around or at the least leave a trail of rice so she can find her way back home. Through pudding eyes Kat objects, "But I don't want to observe the land! I just want to get stuff!" She may have a point. I mean, the girl is all sugar and aspartame so the chances of her coming back to camp covered in juicy insects filled with protein is almost a certainty.
And so, after a quick workshop on the importance of turquoise jewelry, the troop disperses and begins to tackle their chore list. Monica dutifully brings bucket after bucket of water back to camp while Kim wields her axe with force preparing both lumber and firewood. Kat, however, grabs an inflatable pool raft and mutters, "I'm going to the jungle to get bananas. Laters!" With Jugs in tow, the two girls bob up and down in the water giggling over what naughty ninnies they are. Later they'll freeze ChaCha's bra and put Nina's hand in a warm bowl of water while she sleeps. Good times!
And this brings us to an incredibly awkward and half-assed Reward Challenge. Both Salami and Menudo (Manono) find large crates in their tree mail with instructions to carry the crates to a neutral location. Once there we discover that this is a "Do-It-Yourself" challenge where tribes have to untie a series of knots. Exsqueeze me? I realize Dimples' (Jeff Probst) days are busy picking out nature colored shirts and smuggling masseuses into his tent after hours, but what if there's a tie or something? What if someone gets tangled in the ropes and snaps off an ankle? What if Jugs uses this challenge as her opportunity to "accidentally" place a noose over ChaCha's neck? Too many "what if's" if you ask me. Dimples has like 2 things to do an episode. He should have been there. If not to delight us with a smart ass comment or two, then to take the mic away from comedic genius Bill who thinks the ye olde British town crier bit will kill. "Hear ye! Hear ye!", he begins. Through a menagerie of accents that took us everywhere from Jamaica to Robot World, we discover that the winner of this DIY challenge will win a tarp. According to the Oracle, rain is on it's way so this tarp is a big deal I guess.
With one extra person, the men sit out Michael and I suppose it's "Survivor's ready, go." I mean, who the hell knows? Without Dimples there I'm completely lost. All I see is a dandy in a dirndl striking a pose. I don't know whether to start voguing or throwing shade. I'm so confused!
The tribes unpack their giant macramed snaketopuses and get to work. With nimbly fingers, the men untie their way to the center in order to release the ring. However, on the women's side, Jugs is sneakily measuring ChaCha's neck and Kat is dancing around the Maypole re-knotting the untied knots. *sigh* Naturally, the men win the tarp.
Back at Menudo the men get busy doing manly things. Troyzan (Troy) measures the tarp, Jay sharpens several dozen spears, Jonas lugs some crates around, Bill and Tarzan (Greg) prepare scaffolding, Leif cracks coconuts, Michael tightens the roof, and Fancy Pants (Colton) sits on a swing with his petticoats blowing in the breeze. He's a forlorn Keira Knightley wrapping himself around and around in sadness. The ropes of the swing in symbiosis with his heart. He wasn't meant for this tribe of testicles and ball sweat. People who never leave the house without a hand painted fan in their hands aren't cut out for manual labor. Fancy Pants should be soaking in a tub of lavender and sipping mint tea with Harper Lee. In fact, it is to Harper Lee to whom I turn to help me describe Fancy Pants' place in Menudo... "[he] bathed before noon, after [his] three o'clock nap, and by nightfall was like soft tea-cake with frosting of sweat and sweet talcum." At best he's a macaroon, not a Menudo.
Having had all he can take of dirt and bugs and sweat, Fancy Pants prances over to Salami in hopes of finding a quilting bee or a spa party. Instead he stumbles upon the women weaving a new roof. Weaving may not be quilting, but it's close! Without so much as an invitation, Fancy Pants grabs some giant leaves and gets to work. With a coo and a giggle he bemoans his own tribe and begs Sabrina to let him stay with the girls. Where last week there was love for the pastel princess, this week there is nothing but annoyance. In no uncertain terms, Sabrina tells Fancy Pants to go back to his own tribe work on building relationships over there. Way over there. Far far away. Yonder. Plus, the girls want to have a fake women's meeting where they can talk about him behind his back. Fancy Pants stares blankly into the wind for about 15 minutes hoping to blend into nature or something until Sabrina finally grabs him by his bustle and pushes him out.
Apparently it takes a lot more than a gentle shove to get rid of the poor lass as Fancy Pants pretty much just walks around in a big circle and then sneaks back into the girls camp on the opposite side from where he left. Upon seeing him, the girls shift uncomfortably and look to Sabrina get rid of him again. Before Sabrina can so much as lift him up by his garter belts, Fancy Pants calls a troop meeting. (Say what?) With a lace hanky in one hand and a parasol in the other, Fancy Pants collapses into a jumble of tears and begs for shelter. "Please y'all just let me stay." Kim turns to him and tells him point blank that he is a member of Menudo. If he stays with Salami, he could tell Menudo everything that's going on. It would be "a dumb move" for the girls to take in a member of the opposing tribe. Fancy Pants stares unflinching. Silent. It is only with a dramatic spin on his heel that he sashays off to get a drink of water. Does that mean he got the message? *shrugs shoulders* I have no idea. Your guess is as good as mine.
Night falls and fortunately for the girls, Fancy Pants has retreated to his own tribe. Since his effort to become a girl scout failed, he is now going to attempt to buy himself some new friends with his Hidden Immunity Idol. With a poke and a stroke, Fancy Pants rouses Jonas, Troyzan, Leif, and Tarzan from their slumbers. Groggy eyed and confused the men stare at the fop in the full dressing gown and wonder what's going on. "I... have... the... immunity... idol and I'm not going home," Fancy Pants declares. Can I just say that he could perhaps work on his conversational skills a little bit? A salutation here and there or a simple "Hi, you may not know me, but I'm Fancy Pants." could work wonders when trying to make new friends. To just dive in and hurl an Idol at the men's faces is a little abrupt. Even for a maiden fair. Long story short, the men are intrigued and it looks like we have a new alliance of 5. Their targets are "the muscle" which translates to Michael or Matt. I'm no Mattematician, but I think 5 equals more than 4 doesn't it Matthew? You still sittin' pretty, buddy?
And this brings us to the big Immunity Challenge. For today's challenge, both tribes will line up side by side on a narrow balance beam over water. One tribe member at a time must move across the balance beam and around the other tribe members. If you fall off, you go back to the start. If you touch two people at once, you go back to the start. When one tribe member reaches the finish platform then the next tribe member goes. First tribe to get all their tribe members on the platform wins Immunity. Survivors ready, go!
The men sit out Tarzan and we're off. Kat is up first for the women with Leif up first for the men. Leif nimbly and quickly weaves in and out of several of the men's legs, but makes a mistake when he inadvertently touches two men at once. He jumps in the water and goes back to the start.
Meanwhile, Kat turns to face Monica and then never does anything else. She just stands there. Monica begins to wave her arms in an effort to shake Kat loose, but her sticky Twizzler legs aren't going anywhere. Under the glare of the sun, her sugar limbs are turning into syrup. With some frantic grabs at the air and the hollowing out of her chesticles, Monica manages to finally slide Kat off of her and onto Chelsea. While over on the men's side Leif is now finished and Fancy Pants is up next.
Feeling the pressure, Kat clicks her jellybean teeth and moves through the women with such force that she slams into Kim. ChaCha reaches out her arm to save Kim from falling and bzzzz. Kim and Kat have to jump in and Kat has to start over.
On the men's side, all we hear is "Hold me! Hold me! Hold me!" What we don't hear are splashes as the men continue to get more members of their tribe on the final mat.
The same cannot be said for the women's tribe. ChaCha keeps grabbing onto her tribemates' arms while Kat begins to spontaneously dive into the water chasing after snorks and Nemo. A frustrated Monica finally takes the helm and decides to show those bitches how it's done. The only problem is that Kat keeps poking her in the arms and giggling. Bzzzz! Back in the water Monica. Kat does a backflip off the beam while Dimples shakes his head in disbelief. Nina shouts, "Ya dumb broad!" and this is quickly becoming my most favorite challenge ever.
Monica makes her second attempt and declares, "It's ok. I do Pilates. My core is strong. Just move me." And god bless Pilates because she makes it! The only problem is that she makes it when the men are pretty much done and that's all she wrote. MEN WIN IMMUNITY!!!
The women stand saddened wondering what went wrong. KAT. Chelsea thinks that maybe it was their boobs. KAT. Nina blames a lack of teamwork. KAT. And Monica, well Monica is sad for womenkind as a whole. I'm sorry Gloria. I tried to warn you earlier.
Back at the Salami camp it's time for the women to gather around and share their innermost feelings about the challenge. Kat begins by sheepishly apologizing for her lack of communication skills. Lack of communication? Nuh uh sister. Try lack of movement, lack of thought, lack of breath, lack of any nutritional value whatsoever! Look my little gummy bear, I'm sorry to have to say this but you're a flip-flop. You're a wind chime, a tinkle on the wind. A tra-la-la. A careless whisper. You're Wham without George Michael. There's no point to you! I guess it's not your fault. I mean, you didn't put oreo cookie filling into your brain, your father did. You're just doing you and I'm sure that that's charming on a dessert table or in a goodie bag, but this is Survivor, doll baby. Sur-vi-vor! Actually, have you ever thought about trying out for Big Brother? I can personally guarantee that they'll cast you. Just tell Allison that Jordan sent you. You're as good as gold.
So now that we've talked about that pinwheel Kat, let's discuss Nina. For some reason, she's considered a target this week. I'm not sure why. Sure, she's of few words, but she hasn't screwed up and she contributes in camp. Perhaps there's something we're not privy to. I'm not sure. All I know is that Nina is OVER Kat. O-ver! Over it. Nina confides in Monica that there is no way the tribe will survive and succeed as long as Kat is still around gathering dust. Monica agrees, but the problem is that their alliance is small. It's just them and ChaCha. Nina realizes this but hammers home the idea that right now, with Kat blowing bubbles in the background, they're witless. A witless tribe which, as you know, is problematic in a game that calls for you to "outwit".
A move has to be made. Nina and Monica need to make the other alliance realize that they'll just keep losing with Kat in the camp licking the dirt. Here's the thing though, Nina has a genius way to sway everyone. Did you know that she's not only a retired cop, but was pretty much the G.I. Jane of the S.W.A.T. team? Read my little bio on her - she's Demi Moore and "suck my dick!" and all that. The problem is that, for god knows what reason, she's decided to play the game keeping her back story a secret. Maybe that was a good idea in the beginning, but desperate times call for desperate measures. When that camp was looking for a leader, you should have stepped up Nina. You should have said, "I spit in the Master Chief's face and I can do one handed push-ups. I'm more than qualified for this job."
While Nina doesn't exactly regale the girls with story of how she kicked the shit out of Viggo Mortensen, she does slyly hint to Chelsea that Kat should be going home. On the surface Chelsea seems to be on board. She confesses to Nina that she's been embarrassed ever since she arrived in that blasted camp. They're the mockery of the island as far as she's concerned. Chelsea knows Nina is right about Kat. We can see it on her face. Hell, we can hear it ourselves when she tells Kim. Kim, another tough girl. Another sensible tough girl who will see that sweets do nothing more than rot your teeth and give you a headache. Right?
And this brings us to Tribal Council. Stern Mrs. Dimples stands waiting for the girls with a crop in his hand and his hair pulled back into a tight bun. "Well, here you are again girls," he cackles. "You're here because of your complete and utter dysfunction." Ouchie. "No little girl at home wants to be you! No one is rooting you on! Now assume the position." He taps the crop against his thigh as he waits to hear reasons why the girls think they suck so bad. Kim utters the catchphrase, "It's our lack of communication." Oh shut up. Shut. Up. Look, Kat learned that phrase in Comm 101 and hasn't let go of it since. Don't let it be your guiding mantra. This is the same girl whose blood runs thick with peanut butter and pees maple syrup. Get with the program Kim! We like you, ok? We like you and we like Chelsea, but this weird bond with the sugar queen isn't doing you any favors right about now. Are you stuck to her? Has she melted into you? Help me understand.
While you're thinking about it, let's check in with Nina. Oh lookie, now she's telling everyone about her history taking down perps and tazing the bad guys. Nice! Now that she's put that all on the table, how about we hear about Kat's life experience. Kat, you're up.
"Well, once I lived in a gumball machine for 2 whole years!" Thank you Kat.
This is such a no brainer. Let's send Little Debbie home and get these women into shape for next week. This can go no other way than the obvious, right? Right?!? The women will do the smart thing here, yes?
You know what? I can say it as much as I want and I can hope and dream and wish on a star and all that crap, but nothing will change the travesty of last night. The 2nd person voted out of Survivor: One World is Nina. Nooooo! I didn't even get to give her a nickname or anything. It's almost enough to make me long for the days of Rhode Island (Redemption Island). Almost.
So, what did you guys think of last night's episode? Will the women ever win a challenge? What the hell were Chelsea and Kim thinking? Will Matt uncover the secret of the Idol? Are malt eyeballs really a food group? Comment it out bitches and have a great day!
PLEASE DO NOT COPY AND PASTE THIS POST WITHOUT THE EXPRESS WRITTEN PERMISSION OF THE AUTHOR. Thanks.
42 comments:
So far the women on this show are the WORST ever cast...they suck at EVERYTHING. Nina was probably worried about making herself a target by not letting others know her background...but that was a big mistake. I like the misfit alliance on the mens tribe. AT least there might be some intrigue and intersting happenings there. With the women it is just embarrasing to be a woman...ReplyDelete
I can't believe that you didn't mention -- or maybe just missed it -- the moment when Kat walks over and farts on Alicia! Maybe she was just pushing out a lemon drop or something, but watch the video at 31 minutes 36 seconds in.... CLEARLY walks over and farts on her. Yup. Go Girls!ReplyDeleteReplies
Seriously? Damn! I did miss that. What the hell.Delete
- SouthernFebruary 24, 2012 at 2:33 PM
Oh Yeah ~ the look on Nina's face was priceless.Delete
- AnonymousFebruary 23, 2012 at 3:03 PM
You hit the sweet spot on this one Lala. Maybe the girls (can't really call them women) realized that keeping Kat around makes for better TV, ala Phillip. They did us a favor anyway--I am very weary of CSI. Personally I think that Kat and Cochran would make the perfect couple. Why don't we construct a suvivormatch.com for the many ex players and see if we can get them hooked up. And while I don't believe that Fancy Pants will (Richard)Hatch a plot to get to the end, it looks like he may out muscle the Gang of Four for awhile, which will be seriously entertaining.ReplyDelete
Ha ha! I think I developed a cavity and pulled a crown loose reading your description about Kat. I am surprised the women did not turn on Kit Kat after she shed some tears but it was obvious they decided to vote out Nina before going to Council. What's up with Monica's vote for Cha Cha? Was it to shake things loose and maybe target Cha Cha next when the ladies return to the House of Dimples? But after last nights episode, two things became clear to me: boobs get in the way when women golf and boobs get in the way when women try to go around each other on balance beams. Go Boobs!ReplyDelete
Fancy Pants is so annoying and what a difference a week makes where last week he was welcomed with open arms.ReplyDelete
The women of Salami are slowly falling apart and only a tribal reshuffle or a similar miracle from the 19th player of recent seasons to save them from coming Ulong #2.
I did think Kat was gone but in a way I am glad it was Nina because for many reasons, it makes your writing of next weeks episode more entertaining if the women continue on their losing ways and I don't have to be subjected to that fat lip she sustained when she was punched in the face by last weeks net while attempting a routine LAPD SWAT Team training routine.
- AnonymousFebruary 23, 2012 at 3:44 PM
Sad day to be female! The old ladies always go before the cute young things. Doesn't need to make any sense, just the way it is.ReplyDelete
- AnonymousFebruary 23, 2012 at 4:40 PM
Please dont give them the idea of putting Kat in the BB house. She makes Jordon look like a genius.ReplyDelete
Of course voting out Nina was stupid, but we've seen this over and over on Survivor.ReplyDelete
Some five-person tribe gets made early on - almost arbitrarily - and then the five people stick with it, even though it's so often more rational to vote one of them out.
It's like these players can only think one move ahead - "I don't want to be the next one voted out, and I won't if I keep this tribe." They never consider that keeping weak people in the tribe will ensure that they will all ultimately be voted off.
Or they consider it - the way Chelsea and Kim did - but then don't have the courage to pull the trigger. So aggravating.
It's SO OBVIOUS that they're number one priority has to be to strengthen the tribe, or else they're dead, but they don't care.
To be fair, Kat isn't the weakest physical player ever (she's not that wisp of an Asian woman from last season, whose name I happily forgot), and Nina isn't exactly some Challenge God (she's not Ozzy), but still, it was so obvious that the Challenge potential for Nina was much greater.
But Kat was in that five-person alliance on the first day, so she stays.
Oh Goodness this recap was one of my favorites. Fancy Pants gives you so much material to work with that I find myself enjoying the jokes regarding him the best (i.e. "dandy, petticoat". Your opening paragraph was very clever today. Once again, I don't know how you come up with these things. I firmly believe that you are so talented and well known that Dimples does read your blog!ReplyDelete
So as far as the game goes. As soon as Nina was voted off, I began cheering for the boy tribe. Those girls sealed their own stupid fate. They are up against MEN, why would you get rid of anybody strong in that situation?
An alliance of 5 girls isn't going to help them when there are 8 or 9 men (+Fancy Pants) left. I do however love the "Misfit" alliance. And since the girls are voting off the stronger women, it probably won't hurt the Misfits to eliminate the 1 or 2 arrogant men on their own tribe using the idol (if that works). This could be interesting.
- AnonymousFebruary 23, 2012 at 7:02 PM
Great blog, LaLa, as usual. The mental image of Kat & her candied limbs cracked me up. I realize that the game for these survivors is over. They're done and watching each week like we are but I want to scream at these gals!!! YOU'RE EMBARASSING ME!!!!!!!ReplyDelete
The women's team is a stereotype (as is Colten) and I object but unless they can start doing SOMETHING they will remain stereotypical cartoons of women. If you ask a guy what women talk about he'll probably say,"They talk about feelings & communication." Stereotype but in this case it's true and it's pissing me off.
They should not perceive themselves as a tribe of women or the women's tribe but as Salami, the SURVIVOR tribe. Cut the "can't we all get along?" bullshit and Be. A. Tribe. It's also bullshit that women can't get along and therein lies another stereotype perpetuated so far this season. Drop me and 8 of my closest & dearest girl friends in the South Pacific next season on Survivor and we'll show you a competitive, functioning tribe! Get it together, ladies, you're embarassing women everywhere. Afterall, this isn't The Bachelor. It's Survivor!!!!!Replies
I couldn't agree with you more. What makes these people lose every coherent thought the second they hit the beach??Delete
What a hot mess. I'm not even sure where to start. My mind is still filled with so many disturbing images from last night. Tarzan's demented loincloth ritual dance around the fire, Nina's humungous looking-like-I'm-addicted-to-Botox lips, Fancy Pant's limp wristed "Survivors, ready, go" action in the DIY challenge….I'm still a bit nauseous.ReplyDelete
Colton - Someone, please get him a tissue and some Midol, cause girl is seriously having a moment.
Nina – Blondes should never call other blondes "Dumb Blondes". Ever hear the one about people in glass houses and stone throwing??
Kat – Your momma would be so embarrassed if she knew that you cut the major cheese on worldwide television. Well done, Miss Piggy.
Tarzan, for the love of God, put on some pants.
Bill – You are not British, Scottish, Irish, or whatever the hell that was - never have been, never will be. Don't do that again, please.
Women, I am ashamed to share a gender with you.
- cochransmyboy69February 23, 2012 at 9:41 PM
Hey sorry Lala, I copy pasted your blog to Surviver Sucks. I didn't foresee you having any problems with that (there's links to this site in the comments and title and it gets a wider audience. I could have just posted a link but whenever anyone posts a link on sucks I usually ignore it so I copy/pasted.)ReplyDelete
Do I have your blessing to continue?
Either way you're still my favorite blog :)Replies
Hey, I appreciate all the support and your enthusiasm, but having people read my posts at a site other than here actually hurts my blog in the long run. I get advertisers based on hits and who knows how many hits I'm missing if people are reading the blog elsewhere. Plus, I like being able to read everyone's comments and interacting with the readers. Links and a few quotes are fine, but anything more than that is kind of like stealing. Whatever is already up at SS is fine, but I'd prefer it if you just posted links from now on. I'm thrilled you enjoy the blog so much and thanks again for coming forward. I do appreciate it. And start commenting here bitch! With a name like cochransmyboy69, I'd love to hear what you have to say.Delete
- cochransmyboy69February 23, 2012 at 10:53 PM
Aight aight, I'll comment. I loved the Kiera Knightley/Colton metaphor and how he's a lavendar cuppcake with talcum. But my favorite part of the episode, and I'm so glad you have a freeze frame of it, is Colton on the crate announcing the challenge. Just look at him in that picture and imagine him saying "Oh no you di'in't Laquiya!" He does that look on purpose, right? There isn't, like, a gay gene that makes you have a limp wrist and all that is there?Delete
But about the blog, I kinda went on an adderrall/procrastinating on hw binge yesterday for two hours and posted all your episode entries for the past 5 seasons in the thread. :/ So if you'd like I could have the thread deleted and start a new one with just a link and an excerpt from the blog.
Oh boy, uh yeah just go ahead and delete the thread altogether then. Thanks!Delete
If you want more support why don't you tell us more about yourself. It may help connect you with your audience better.Delete
I didn't realize I had a problem connecting with my audience. Uh, thanks?Delete
Well you said "I get advertisers based on hits and who knows how many hits I'm missing if people are reading the blog elsewhere" which I thought meant you want as much support as possible. So if you connect with your audience more, you might get more support. I was just trying to help...didn't mean to offend you. I love your blog. Its actually the only one I read lol.Delete
- AnonymousFebruary 25, 2012 at 6:06 AM
We are all children of the glitter-dunking boob circle. Ain't no other connection needed hon :)Delete
- cochransmyboy69February 25, 2012 at 1:58 PM
I made sure it was deleted. Still got banned though. Me and my ghostie! grrrr. I'll set up a new thread with a link and an excerpt once I get to a computer with a different IP address!Delete
Great blog as usual. Really it seems like only Sabrina and Monica are even functioning on the ole girls tribe.ReplyDelete
Also I'd like to propose Bronas as a nickname for the delightful sushi chef; whenever he gets a line on-camera it almost invariably contains 'bro'.
I have a feeling its gonna be very entertaining watching kat try and prove herself teeheehee.ReplyDelete
Let me just try to sort this out...There's an alliance of 3 (Monica, Cha-Cha, Nina) and an alliance of 5 (Alicia, Sabrina, Kat, Kim, Chelsea). Kat is a complete moron and a drain/embarrassment to the tribe. Nina approaches Chelsea, who approaches Kim to band together and vote out Kat. Thus making a new alliance of 5 (Monica, Cha-Cha, Nina, Chelsea, Kim). This is a no-lose situation for Kim and Chelsea. They are still in a dominant alliance, now with some pretty decent women and leaving Mean Girl Alicia and Clueless Kat in the minority. (Don't really know where Sabrina would land in all of this but she's not significant to the thought process.) But they don't do it!ReplyDelete
My question is, WHY???? Why did they not choose to abandon Alicia and Kat, who so deserve it?? For my answer, I had to return to my high school roots. Alicia is the mean girl who is always ditching class, writes nasty things about you on the wall in the boys' bathroom, and locks you in your gym locker. She's the girl that everyone knows will never amount to anything in this world. BUT NO ONE WILL STAND UP TO HER!!!!
Where is John Hughes when we need him? I've got a few girls who need to watch a few coming-of-age, little-guy-stands-up-to-the-bully movies. Those girls needed just a little bit of backbone to stand up and put themselves in control and in a better position and they couldn't do it! Monica and Nina would have been 100 times more loyal than Alicia and dear little Kit Kat. I think Sabrina would've seen the light too and the alliances would've been 6-2. SO frustrating!
Alicia is the problem, and no one has the guts to stand up to her and turn the tables.
- prettyplainjoFebruary 24, 2012 at 12:32 AM
I finally got a chance to actually read the blog and I'm happy I did because it softened the blow of such a shitty episode. The entire time I was reading I kept thinking one question over and over: "Where the fuck does she get this stuff???" Well, I don't know where, but its brilliant. Nice job.ReplyDelete
- AnonymousFebruary 24, 2012 at 4:30 AM
I think the next move is for the men to figure they have no competition from the women so they might as well start eliminating each other. If Colton and his new clique can hold together, they might be able to eliminate some of the muscle to the point where we have only idiots and incompetents playing the game. Meanwhile if the women shape up and outlast the fratricide, there is a chance some of them might make it to the end but not before we have to listen to endless patronizing macho bullshit. This does not bode well. I just hate it when everything revolves around hysterical drama. A little bit is entertaining but at some point I want to see people gird their loins and start splashing blood on the doorposts. Let's go already ladies.ReplyDelete
I think one of the problems is the casting. I realize they want sex appeal, but I'm tired of a majority of bimbo men and women on the show. If they feel they need sexy, find some sexy older women and make the older women a majority. I truly believe a core of 35-45 year olf women would learn to function as a group much better than bimbo central. Dawn did great last season but never had a chance. Every season the older, smarter, better woman player gets offed early.ReplyDelete
And while I can't stand Colton, worthless dung, I love the other misfits. This season is pretty crappy so far. I hope it gets better.Replies
"If they feel they need sexy, find some sexy older women and make the older women a majority. I truly believe a core of 35-45 year olf women would learn to function as a group much better than bimbo central. Dawn did great last season but never had a chance. Every season the older, smarter, better woman player gets offed early."Delete
I totally agree and it will be a SHAME if Monica goes this early. She is strong physically and mentally.
That's a good point. Hopefully, they'd have grown out of the dopey bickering these younger women seem to engage in.Delete
- SouthernFebruary 24, 2012 at 2:32 PM
Voting Nina out and keeping Kat was stunningly stupid. I'm embarrassed too, Monica ~ so embarrassed that I just can't pull for a tribe of nitwits who never stop doing stupid stuff. By the way ~ why did Monica not vote for Kat?ReplyDelete
Gotta pull for the men ~ the new alliance of 5 ~ and anyway, Troy is hot, so that makes it easier.
And puhleeze ~ vote Jugs out ~ she's ridiculous.
@Jer, you nailed my daydream for next season. I would love to see Survivor played out with everyone between the age of 30 and 50. And I'd really love it if they also had everyone be of (somewhat) similar physical ability.ReplyDelete
I get that they want younger viewers--so fine, I say throw in a couple of younger women and couple of young guys too. I do *not* see older players entirely excluding younger players based solely on age--whereas younger players are extremely prone to doing so.
Survivor also really screwed up last season when they showed Coach quickly making his alliance-of-5. I think it was like drawing a how-to cartoon that even an idiot like Kat can figure out. They just made it way, way to easy. People who don't know each other at all can now make their alliance-of-5 before they even make it to their campsite. And they can do it easily even if you've got a couple of idiots.
Lastly, I'm so glad that the bible thumping has been left in the dust. Hope it stays there. ick. It was offensive to Christians and non-Christians alike.
Loving, loving the recaps. Thx!!
- meggheggFebruary 24, 2012 at 6:36 PM
I think Kat should have asked at Tribal Council why, if Nina was so athletic, she managed to bash her own face in on the net. While it might not have been the case here, future contestants should take note that crappy language ("dumb blond") spoken about your team-mates might put you in a bad light, which can be reason enough for summary dismissal.ReplyDelete
I couldn't believe how Fancy Pants whined his way over to the women's tribe and BEGGED for acceptance, which was downright disgraceful to all men! But equally despicable was how the whole Salami tribe treated him (her?). I would have thought that the women would have brought him into the fold, and used him to feed mis-information to Menudo - now that's a social game! But I do hope that Fancy Pants at least shows some Kahunas, puts the entire women's tribe on his #@%& list, and takes the stragglers out in due time. But then again, this is Fancy Pants, and this is Survivor...
Great Recap, Lala!
- Germaine Greer interjected...February 24, 2012 at 9:03 PM
...Because you're wrong! So shut up! How DARE you criticise Kat! She is a ray of sunshine, a gorgeous and carefree example of womanhood! When she bounced over to Alicia and gleefully discharged her intestinal wind I knew at once that she was an independent, rebellious young woman who has avoided being indoctrinated into a Stepford Wife like that loathsome Monica. This is not about something as banal as "competence" or as prosaic as the winning of money, you foolish, glitter tossing cynic. There is a bigger picture here! This is about, oh how did my close friend Madonna put it? Expressing Yourself! Yes, that's right, my close friend Madonna was gleefully cheering on Kitty Kat as she expressed herself by deliberately flouting the rules imposed upon her by that prototypical misogynist Jeff (ooh, I can barely write his name) Probst. *Uh! spit!*ReplyDelete
Not only once, but TWICE did she express herself by following her natural feminine whimsy and gracefully diving into the the bosom of the ocean, in contrast to the men who, like good little soldiers, followed orders to the letter.
It's women like you and this Nina, women who focus on mundane practical outcomes, who ultimately reinforce the patriarchal hegemony that results in thousands of our sisters ironing shirts all day while watching "The View". Slack-jawed, they stoically await the return of their man, only to endure a joyless and debasing penis stabbing at the end of a long day of thankless toil.
As you have a platform, so to do you have a responsibility. In my day there was no "internet". There was no "blogging". There was no reality fucking TV at all (yes, that's right... I swear whenever I feel like it. Is that a problem for you? Do you have a problem with me expressing myself? - Madonna is a close personal friend of mine you repressed American!). Which is not to say that "American" is necessarily pejorative. I concede that Harper Lee is American, for example. Despite your complete misunderstanding of Kitty Kat's courageous and empowering behaviour, you were clever enough to make excellent contextual use of that passage from "To Kill a Mockingbird". That is a work I greatly admire. I think Harper would have been besotted by this Colton Cumbie. Well, at least for an afternoon or so. After that I think she would have wanted to stomp all over his fucking face.
Oh, the mention of "To Kill a Mockingbird" has made me a little maudlin. I was in love with Scout you see. I've been searching for my Scout for years, but to no avail. Sometimes it's bloody lonely being a revolutionary like Madonna and I. Say, maybe we got off on the wrong foot. How about you ignore all the vitriol I just spewed and meet me for cocktails and cunnilingus tonight? I just really, really need my pussy licked. I was talking about this very subject with my close friend Madonna just the other night, in fact. I did mention that Madonna is a close personal friend of mine, didn't I?
I do not want to imply that some of your blogs are inferior to others. No, like men, all blogs are created equal. But we both know that some blogs are more equal than others, don't we?ReplyDelete
Well, this is the second most equal blog of yours that I have read. And only two episodes in at that! Well done.
I would love to leave comments, but I lost interest in the shows. One has women vs men... wow, so exciting. And Amazing Assholes has the couple that in my mind completely destroyed Big Brother for a span of over two years. So love ya Lala, but I can't stand CBS and the dipshit fuckheads that think and agree to these casts or ideas and believe it works. I was going to watch Survivor, just because it seems like no one was coming back, only to find the only reason was probably because of Bird Girl and Neanderthal Man on the other show. I wait to see how bad Julie Chen and her pack of monkeys do to have another extremely awful BB for the trifecta. Happy early St Patty's day ;DReplyDelete
For some reason the producers and directors are getting perverse pleasure in re-running the most irritating cast members from other reality shows. I would prefer new irritating cast to at least give us something new to chat about. The best example is Boston Rob, I still cannot understand what he is saying, after too many appearances. The producers outnumber the older tribe members for the desired effect, the producers must be 25 years old themselves and maybe trying to hook up with their favorites, who knows what is going on back at base camp, it might be interesting if an "insider" would spill the beans, bring on TMZ.ReplyDelete
Can't wait for this week's blog!!! OMG - have I changed my mind about Fancy Pants!! What a jerk!!!and they're all following him like little sheep - giving up immunity was CRAZY!!! After everything colton said (and his whole attitude) during tribal council, I was hoping they all would have voted him off. What Bill said at the very end proved he's the better person.ReplyDelete
We are all children of the glitter-dunking boob circle. Ain't no other connection needed hon :)ReplyDelete


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text:
This is TELL ME MORE, from NPR News. I'm Celeste Headlee. Michel Martin is away. Today is the National Day of Listening, a declaration made five years ago by the national oral history project, Story Corps. It's a day to sit down with a loved one, a friend, a colleague, and just have a conversation with them and listen to them.
This year, Story Corps is featuring the stories of veterans, active duty military and their families, and that coincides with the launch of Story Corps' new project, The Military Voices Initiative, which will launch in December. This past month, the president and CEO of NPR News, Gary Knell, wrote about the passing of his father David Knell, and he mentioned his years as an Army officer in Texas in the 1940s. And that made us want to hear more.
So we invited Gary Knell for a conversation on this National Day of Listening.
Gary, welcome.
GARY KNELL, BYLINE: Celeste, thanks for having me.
HEADLEE: And not to be too cliche, but we do want you to tell us more. So since today is his birthday, November 23rd, he would've been 96 years old. That's nearly a hundred years. Take us back to that moment in time in which he was born.
KNELL: Well, he was born in Youngstown, Ohio. He was the second son of immigrant families from Russia, and that was a year when Albert Einstein had completed the General Theory of Relativity. The 40-hour work week was created. President Wilson was sending 12,000 troops into Mexico to go chase Poncho Villa. The hamburger was invented that year.
I went back and looked in time just to put into perspective - for my kids and my dad's grandkids and great-grandkids - what life was like when he was born. It was quite a different time.
HEADLEE: Was it a different era when he went and joined the military?
KNELL: Well, sure. His family, his parents, immigrated - as did my mother's family - immigrated from the East to the West. And there was kind of a big migration of folks in the 1930s and - who came out, in our case, to Southern California and moved to places like Pasadena. They had a house on Venice Beach literally a block from the ocean that he showed me just about 18 months ago.
I never even knew he was a surfer guy, but who knew? He met my mom just before leaving for the Army, which he enlisted in 1941, before the U.S. was really actively engaged in the theater of war in Europe or Asia. And he had to go off to other places around the country and was trying to get transferred, frantically, back to California - which he was unable to do, by the way.
They moved him to Fort Smith in Arkansas. And he eventually became an officer and ended up serving in a POW camp in Texas, overseeing the payroll of our fellow members of the Army, as well as overseeing a camp that had 3,000 German prisoners. And I sort of was shocked to hear about this. Like, when he told me about these things, it was like, wow. This story needs to be told.
HEADLEE: If you're just joining us, this is TELL ME MORE, from NPR News. Today is the National Day of Listening. It's a day to sit down with a loved one, a friend, or a colleague, have a conversation with them and listen to them. This year, Story Corps, the National Oral History Project, features veterans, active duty military and their families. And we're joined in the studios with Gary Knell, the president and CEO of NPR News.
He's remembering his late father David Knell and his years of service in the U.S. Army.
You mentioned your mother and the great romance between your mom and your dad, it turned out that the military was kind of the crucible of the beginning of their marriage. Did the rest of the marriage reflect those early days?
KNELL: It did. Actually, these were two people who - we could come up with very few instances when these two people ever argued, which is kind of unusual for a couple who was married north of 50 years. They were held together and they were looked at as sort of the cement of the family by their siblings, by their cousins, by people who would seek their advice.
So this romance that occurred in the 1940s and which blossomed quickly into a marriage, I think never ended. And when my mom passed away in 1996 I think my dad was really never the same. It was sort of - it wasn't supposed to be like that. He had just retired, and they had begun to see the world and do things.
And then she left him, and I think, you know, he was able to carry on for, you know, another 16 years or so, which is a long time, but there was a huge part of his life that was missing. And, you know, now we can say that they're back together.
HEADLEE: A few years back, you gave the commencement address at UCLA, and that's a place in which you were addressing multiple generations. You were talking directly to the young graduates of UCLA, but in the audience was also your father. What was that like?
KNELL: Well, that commencement was very emotional for me. I mean, I was a graduate myself some, you know, 30 years earlier. And going back and walking down the aisle with the chancellor and having my dad in the audience, who had graduated from the class of 1939, and when the dean announced that he was there, 13,000 people at Pauley Pavilion stood up and gave him a round of applause, which I think was, you know, one of the special moments of his life.
And it was such a poignant time for me, just watching and relishing that moment to see him stand there, holding his hands above his head and being able to take in and breathe in the adulation for perseverance. And also, it was a way of just honoring education and the importance that that university in particular had given him, and it obviously was now being shared with the thousands of people in Pauley Pavilion that day.
HEADLEE: For somebody out there who has never done a National Day of Listening, give someone a piece of advice on how to approach a loved one or a family member that they want to have a conversation with. How do they broach that topic?
KNELL: Well, you know, it's interesting. About five or six years ago, my youngest daughter, who's now 18, I asked her to put a video camera in her hand and interview my dad. And that was a really good idea. And one of the things that I think people should do as our parents and our grandparents get older, and our aunts and uncles, make sure that there is some young person who's opening them up, because, first of all, they love talking to grandchildren, most grandparents, or younger people, because they do want to hand down these stories. But most people of that age don't think anyone's interested. And the fact is, is not only do we need to be interested, but this is our past. And in many ways, as we know, the past predicts the future.
This is something I think, in America, we could do better. I think connecting generations is something that maybe has gotten a little bit lost, especially as technology has brought us together in some ways and made a huge divide generationally in other ways. It's important that we don't just assume away older generations of people.
HEADLEE: Thank you so much for joining us today. I've been speaking with Gary Knell, the president and CEO of NPR News. Thank you so much.
KNELL: Celeste, it's a pleasure. Thank you for having me on and being able to share this story.
HEADLEE: If you'd like to see some photos of Gary's father, David Knell, we have them on our website. Go to npr.org and look under Programs for TELL ME MORE.
This conversation was part of Story Corps's National Day of Listening. To participate yourself, go to the website: NationalDayofListening.org. There, you'll find a wall of listening that lets people record their stories and upload a picture. So they make it easy. You can also follow on Twitter using the hashtag #listenclosely.
Copyright © 2012 NPR. All rights reserved. Visit our website terms of use and permissions pages at www.npr.org for further information.
NPR transcripts are created on a rush deadline by Verb8tm, Inc., an NPR contractor, and produced using a proprietary transcription process developed with NPR. This text may not be in its final form and may be updated or revised in the future. Accuracy and availability may vary. The authoritative record of NPR's programming is the audio record.


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Focus Financial Partners announced Tuesday that four of its partner firms have completed strategic transactions in the last 60 days, either closing on important sub-acquisitions or recruiting well-respected new professionals to their firms.
The four firms are JFS Wealth Advisors, LLBH Private Wealth Management, CapGroup Advisors and The Buckingham Family of Financial Services. The deals boost client assets by approximately $450 million.
"These recent transactions are excellent examples of the kind of growth plans that Focus has always supported," said Rudy Adolf (left), founder and CEO of Focus, in a statement. "For any financial advisor, the client is always the top priority, leaving little time to think about strategic acquisitions or senior recruitment. In leveraging Focus' national network and industry relationships, our partner firms can strengthen their business continuity, client services and growth trajectories far more easily than they could on their own."
Supported by Focus Financial, the following four strategic transactions have closed in the last 60 days:
- Pittsburgh-based H.L. Zeve Associates merged with JFS Wealth Advisors: JFS Wealth Advisors, an independent wealth management firm in Hermitage, Pa., acquired Pittsburgh-based H.L. Zeve Associates, a wealth advisory firm with $325 million in assets under management. The transaction, completed on Dec. 31, brings JFS Wealth Advisors' assets to more than $1.2 billion of client assets under management, making it a premier firm in the Pittsburgh market. Under the agreement, Harvey Zeve, founder and CEO of H.L. Zeve, has joined JFS as a consultant and Steve Lee, president of H.L. Zeve, will stay on as managing principal. Founded in 1986 by Bob Jazwinski, JFS provides integrated financial planning and investment strategies to over 1,000 clients across 30 states. Jazwinski said in the statement that "We are excited to have the talented team from H.L. Zeve on board. Their engrained presence in the Pittsburgh market allows us to extend our services to a broader range of high-net-worth clients."
- LLBH Private Wealth Management strengthens leadership with new managing director: On Dec. 1, LLBH Private Wealth Management, a Westport, Conn., independent RIA with nearly $1 billion in client assets, appointed Haley Rockwell as a new managing director. Rockwell joins LLBH through a partnership agreement with Greenwich, Conn.-based Chronogram, a private wealth management firm, where she managed $110 million in client assets and served as owner and CEO. In joining LLBH, Rockwell can leverage LLBH's multifamily office offering and resources for her ultrahigh-net-worth clients. LLBH's continued growth and success has allowed it to expand its family service offering, including trustee and concierge-level services, to meet the needs of its ultrahigh-net-worth clients.
- CapGroup Advisors hires financial advisor Jeremy Kuhlen and acquires private client assets: Richmond-based CapGroup Advisors, a founding partner of Focus Financial with more than $1 billion in assets, hired Jeremy Kuhlen as Managing Director, effective Jan. 1. Kuhlen previously co-founded Mentor Wealth Management, a Richmond-based firm with approximately $35 million in assets. Under the agreement, CapGroup will merge Mentor's clients into its Private Client Practice. As a member of CapGroup, Kuhlen can now offer his clients access to a large team of industry professionals and institutional resources, including sophisticated portfolio management and technological infrastructure. Kuhlen's strong relationships in and around Richmond will help support CapGroup's growth and business development goals.
In addition, The Buckingham Family of Financial Services, comprised of Buckingham Asset Management, BAM Advisor Services and BAM Risk Management, has appointed the author and blogger Dan Solin as a wealth advisor at Buckingham Asset Management and as director of investor advocacy at BAM Alliance, a community of more than 130 independent wealth management firms.
In his new role, Solin will be responsible for enhancing the vast library of thought leadership materials already produced by the firm's thought leaders, including Carl Richards and Larry Swedroe, and will help lead the firm's business development efforts. Prior to joining the BAM Alliance, Solin was senior vice president at Index Fund Advisors, an Irvine, Calif.-based RIA, where he managed significant levels of assets and was responsible for business development.


text:
Örebro [1] is a modern city located in the small province of Närke in Svealand in south central Sweden. It's located on the flat Närke plains, surrounded by vast forest areas. It's Sweden's 7th largest municipality with a population of about 129,000 (2006).
Örebro was previously known as a shoe manufacturing center. Nowadays a lot of people living here work for the public sector, for instance with statistics.
Get in[edit]
By plane[edit]
There are daily flights to Örebro from Malmö, Copenhagen and Stockholm/Arlanda.
By train[edit]
Örebro is located near Hallsberg, which is Sweden's premier train hub. Train connectivity is therefore excellent from all over Sweden.
By car[edit]
E20, E18 and riksväg 50 all connect in Örebro.
By bus[edit]
Swebus express [2] and Säfflebussen [3] offers bus services to and from most major cities. Lindbergs buss [4] has cheap tickets, one daily departure to and from Stockholm.
By boat[edit]
Get around[edit]
The city center is easily explored on foot. There is a well functioning network of city buses [5] serving all parts of the city. Almost all regional and city buses stop at Resecenter (next to the train station). Järntorget also functions as a hub for the city buses. The municipality offers bicycles for rent if one wishes to explore the city by bike. Enquire at the tourist agency in the castle.
See[edit][add listing]
Do[edit][add listing]
The city has its own university [12].
Buy[edit][add listing]
There are lots of shopping opportunities in the shopping malls Krämaren and Åhléns and on the streets Drottninggatan, Köpmangatan and Kungsgatan. Nothing that you can't buy everywhere else in Sweden though.
Bra & Begagnat (Standing on the major square, Järntorget, and looking directly west, on your right hand there is a brown building. Between the brown building and a Tex-Mex restaurant there is a small alley called "Gamla Gatan". Down the alley, 50 meters on your right.) Open Wed 2PM-6PM, Sat 10AM-2PM. A second-hand store with a small café serving homemade cakes, buns and cookies. All who work there (wearing yellow shirts) are volunteers, they are friendly and it's very cheap. All profits from the store are donated to charity.
Getting Online[edit]
Most of the Cafés in the city offers free Wifi, just ask the staff for the password.
Eat[edit][add listing]
Best days out are generally Wednesdays, Fridays and Saturdays.
You can pick up the free Nollnitton magazine in various stores to read more about Örebro's nightlife. It is only available in Swedish though.
All the "bigger chains" of pubs are represented in Örebro such as Harry´s, Bishops Arms, O´Learys and Pitchers. The O´Learys bar/pub/restaurant in Örebro is one of the biggest in Sweden. They can all be found near the Castle in the centre of the city.
Sleep[edit][add listing]
Stay safe[edit]
Örebro is not a dangerous town, although that is no excuse to leave your common sense at home.
Get out[edit]


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text:
According to Diane Welch, official biographer of Rice's tale, "Lilian J. Rice, Architect of Rancho Santa Fe," the error occurred when well-meaning volunteers at the cemetery attempted to restore a number of headstones, including Rice's, after vandals nearly destroyed them. It was then that Rice's headstone was inadvertently changed from her correct birth date — June 12, 1889 — to 1888.
On Dec. 6, however, history was righted, thanks to the efforts of a few local women and their intent to honor a well-respected pioneer in her field. From this point forward, Rice's correct date of birth will be reflected to designate her place of rest in the cemetery, thanks to Welch, project underwriter Miriam Sellgren, a living relative of Rice by marriage, and La Jolla-based engraving professional Tara Tarrant, who executed the careful etching by of the historic stone.
"It's amazing to me how long it's taken to get this corrected," said Tarrant. "I feel honored to be part of this historical event. I'm inspired by Lilian's accomplishments, especially being in a more masculine-dominated industry, as is my work. She has definitely left an impression on many."
The architect was a trailblazing pioneer of her time, stepping into a profession largely dominated by men. She was the brainchild behind many well-known San Diego buildings, including the present-day La Jolla home of Mitt and Ann Romney and the ZLAC Rowing Club boathouse on Mission Bay. Her most notable work, however, was as the master architect of Rancho Santa Fe in the 1920s and '30s.
"When Lilian Rice, a National City native, passed away on Dec. 22, 1938, she was recognized and revered — countywide and beyond — as a master architect of the highest caliber," said Welch. "Fast-forward to current day and Lilian Rice's name is not quite so revered. There are many published untruths about her life, work and achievements."
Many vocal historians claimed she lied about her position as the lead designer and resident supervisory architect of Rancho Santa Fe in order to reap more residential business.
"This has damaged Lilian Rice's reputation in recent years, and in so doing, some of her historic work has been demolished," said Welch. "Along with this negative campaign, her name is universally spelled incorrectly and her birth year is often cited as 1888, the date that appears on her headstone."
Welch hopes through her biographical work and the correction to the headstone, Rice's reputation will be restored.
"It is hoped in correcting this unfortunate oversight that, going forward, Lilian Rice's birth year will be attributed correctly. And in bringing her name into the spotlight in time for the 74th anniversary of her passing, that her rightful place in our state's history will be reclaimed," said Welch. "My aim is to bring her out of the shadows of time and to make her relevant today so that her determination and achievements may inspire others to succeed."
To find out more about Lilian Rice, visit www.lilianjrice.com.


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MT Costello F15 (3)
MT Costello F15 (3)
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text: This Lister clipper has the latest technology in "clipperdom." It's smaller, shorter, lighter, more balanced than most. Its ergonomic design fits smaller hands well. Features include a full-width Lister patented ventilated head, enclosed gearbox for low maintenance, and low running noise. Its permanent magnet motor runs at a slower speed but won't get bogged down no matter what the load on it. Comes with a medium blade set (good for goats), gear grease, oil, and storage case. Fine, medium, surgical, and plucking blade sets are available. The Lister Clipper has a flat shipping fee of $18.70 anywhere in the continental United States.


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Girl, born August 2009
After-effects of viral encephalitis in the form of microcephaly, movement disorders syndrome (cerebral palsy syndrome), epileptic syndrome of residual genesis, secondary hypothalamic syndrome, loop of thermal control
Brinli has pretty eyes, and such lovely long fingers. She desperately needs a family to save her from a life spent lying in a crib.
Large families welcome, married couples only. Travel required.


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See a larger version
Elicena Cota, Mata Ortiz and Casas Grandes, Polychrome jar with sgraffito and painted dragonfly and vine design
Pueblo: Mata Ortiz and Casas Grandes
Dimensions: 14 in H by 8 3/4 in Dia Measurement includes stand
Item Number: xxcgh8448m7
Price: $ 1100
Description: Polychrome jar with sgraffito and painted dragonfly and vine design
Condition: Excellentℑs=4
Signature: Elicena Cota
Date Created: 2018
Elicena CotaMata Ortiz and
Casas Grandes
Elicena Cota Lopez primarily paints brilliant colored designs on black graphite pots, a complicated process that took several potters more than ten years to perfect. But Elicena has the process down and went home from the 2013 Arizona-Sonora Desert Museum Women Potters of Mata Ortiz competition with a 3rd Place ribbon for Best of Show (traditional black category) and the 2nd Place ribbon in the Traditional Black category.
Born in 1979 in Mata Ortiz, Elicena grew up learning to make pottery with her parents and finally struck out on her own at 17 years old. A few years later she married Efrain Lucero Jr. and they often work together on their pots.
Elicena's designs usually incorporate birds or dragonflies and a tree branch or vine motif that covers the entire surface of the vessel. The base designs (tree branches, vines, flowers and bird outlines) are scratched into the vessel, then the birds and flowers are painted on.
Print this biography (.pdf)
Mata Ortiz and Casas Grandes
The macaw pens at Paquimé
Casas Grandes is both a municipality and an archaeological district in northern Chihuahua State, Mexico. The archaeological district includes the pre-historic ruins of Paquimé, a city that began to build around 1130 AD and was abandoned about 1450 AD. Archaeologists are uncertain as to whether Paquimé was settled by migrants from the Mogollon/Mimbres settlements to the north or by Anasazi elite from the Four Corners region in the United States or by others. Over the years Paquimé was built into a massive complex with structures up to six and seven stories high with multiple Great Houses in the surrounding countryside. Today, the site is a UNESCO World Heritage Site.
Mata Ortiz is a small settlement inside the bounds of the Casas Grandes municipality very near the site of Paquimé. The fortunes of the town have gone up and down over the years with a real economic slump happening after the local railroad repair yard was relocated to Nuevo Casas Grandes in the early 1960's. The town was in steady decline until Juan Quezada, a poor farmer who gathered firewood in the area of the archaeological site, found fragments of ancient Paquimé pottery and even older fragments of Mimbres forms with bold black-on-white designs littering the ground. Those pot shards inspired him to recreate how that pottery had first been made.
Ramos Polychrome effigy from Paquimé
Quezada was successful in his quest to recreate the ancient process using slightly more modern techniques (although no one in the present tradition uses a potter's wheel). He learned to use sand and other coarse materials for temper. He discovered that dried cow dung made an excellent and inexpensive firing fuel. Instead of using gourds for smoothing he substituted broken hacksaw blades. Instead of using yucca fiber brushes for painting he learned to make brushes with human baby hair. He persevered in his efforts and by 1971 had produced a kind of polychrome pottery. Since then, most pottery-making in the area has used innovations in the design and decoration of the pots but the materials and the basic crafting of the process have remained the same.
By the mid-1970's, Quezada had attracted a significant number of traders and his work was becoming a commercial success. That is when he began teaching his techniques to his immediate family. They in turn taught other family members, friends and the younger generations. Both women and men were included from the beginning.
Contemporary Mata Ortiz pottery was mistakenly called Casas Grandes prehistoric pottery in the early years of its production. But the potters of this tiny village have made such an impact on the pottery communities, including many awards and special recognition from the Presidents of Mexico, that Mata Ortiz pottery is now becoming known around the world.
Today, pottery production has changed the village in many ways as there is now electricity, plumbing, vehicles and more for the residents. Virtually everyone in the small town (2010 population: 1,182) makes their living by working in some part of the pottery-making process, from potters to clay-gatherers to firewood collectors to traders.
Mata Ortiz pottery incorporates elements of contemporary and prehistoric design and decoration, and each potter or pottery family produces their own distinctive, individualized ware. Young potters from surrounding areas have been attracted to the Mata Ortiz revival and new potting families have developed while the art movement continues to expand. Without the restraints of traditional religious practices or gender constraints, a vibrant flow of new ideas has enabled the pottery of Mata Ortiz to avoid the derivative repetition common to virtually all folk art movements. This blend of economic need, gender equality, cultural expression and artistic freedom has produced a unique artistic movement in today's community.
Mata Ortiz pottery at Wikipedia
Mata Ortiz at Wikipedia
Casas Grandes at Wikipedia
Upper photo is in the public domain
Lower photo is courtesy of David Monniaux, Creative Commons Attribution-Share Alike 3.0 Unported License
Print this Pueblo History(.pdf)
Pottery Care & Consideration
- The most obvious tip: Yes, the pots will break if you drop them!
- Do not expose pottery to water (Inside or outside). Do not wipe with a damp cloth.
- Dust pottery only with a soft, smooth cloth (no terry cloth or textured fabric). A very soft paintbrush (sable or camel) can be used.
- Always use two hands to carry your pot: one on top and one on the bottom, or one hand on each side. Be careful with handles, they can be fragile. Do not grip or lift pots by the rim. Take care when wearing jewelry, rings can scratch the finish.
- Place a piece of felt or cloth between the pot and the shelf to protect the signature.
- Avoid exposing pottery to extreme temperature changes.
For those who live in "earthquake country" (also good for mischievous pets):
- Weigh pots down with a small zip lock bag containing sand, glass marbles, rice, etc. Do not fill the pot more than one third full as you want them bottom heavy. Remember to remove the weight before moving.
- Secure your shelves; make sure they are well attached to the walls. Shelf brackets should be of sufficient length and strength to support the weight of your pottery.
- Prevent pots from sliding. Consider attaching a small wooden molding to the front of shelves. Line shelves with non-slip material (a thin sheet of rubber foam, Styrofoam sheeting, etc.)
- If you need assistance with special problems, major cleaning (your grandchild spills ice cream on your pot), restoration or repair (the cat breaks a pot), or replacement (irreparable damage), please feel free to call us.
We hope these ideas help you maintain the beauty and value of your pottery for years of enjoyment.
100 West San Francisco Street, Santa Fe, New Mexico 87501 (505) 986-1234
Santa Fe, NM 87501


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Key Specs
2995 sq/ft
4 Bedrooms
4 Baths
2 Stories
2 Garages
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- Right and Left Elevations: The right and left elevations provide the same details as the front and rear elevations.
- Roof Plan: This drawing, usually at ¼"=1'-0" scale, will be a bird's eye view of the home. It will show the ridges, hips, and valleys. This page will show a beautifully designed roof.*Framing is not included.
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- General Notes: Separate sheets that provide standard construction notes, in addition included are the details required to comply with International Residential Code (IRC) & Southern Building Code (SBC).
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text:
Patient Center
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August 13, 20191:45 PM
Thank you for choosing The Frist Clinic at Centennial for your medical needs.
To reschedule an appointment, call us directly 615-342-5909.
In order to expedite your visit, please bring the following items:
Please note that patients scheduling an annual physical exam should be fasting for a minimum of 6 hours prior to the appointment.
For your convenience, complimentary valet parking is available in the front of our building.
Thank you and we look forward to seeing you!
If you are unable to find a desired appointment, please contact our office at 615-342-5909, and the receptionist will be happy to accommodate you.
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Carpal tunnel syndrome is caused by a compressed nerve in the wrist that causes symptoms in the hand. Pressure on the median nerve, which is inside a narrow passage in the wrist called the carpal tunnel, causes the nerve to malfunction. This nerve provides feeling to the thumb, index and middle fingers, and half the ring finger. It also controls several muscles in the hand, including the muscle that allows the thumb to touch the little finger. Compression occurs when the tissues in the carpal tunnel swell up.
Carpal tunnel syndrome is a repetitive strain injury. Although there are many causes for carpal tunnel syndrome, by far the most common is doing repetitive motions as part of your job. Many experts believe that the increased incidence of carpal tunnel syndrome is due to changes in workplace responsibilities in which one person commonly does a single task over and over again. There are approximately 1 million new cases every year.What are the risk factors for carpal tunnel syndrome?What are some causes of carpal tunnel syndrome?What are the symptoms of carpal tunnel syndrome?How is carpal tunnel syndrome diagnosed?What are the treatments for carpal tunnel syndrome?Are there screening tests for carpal tunnel syndrome?How can I reduce my risk of developing carpal tunnel syndrome?What questions should I ask my doctor?What is it like to live with carpal tunnel syndrome?Where can I get more information about carpal tunnel syndrome?
Revision Information
- Reviewer: EBSCO Medical Review Board James P. Cornell, MD
- Review Date: 09/2018 -
- Update Date: 09/17/2014 -


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