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Which sex is the worst about washing up? Why is it so important? We've got the dirty truth on how and when to wash your hands.
Information and Resources
Computed Tomography (CT) Scan of the Body
How It Feels
The test will not cause pain. The table you lie on may feel hard, and the room may be cool. It may be hard to lie still during the test.
Some people feel nervous inside the CT scanner.
If a medicine to help you relax (sedative) or dye (contrast material) is used, an IV is usually put in your hand or arm. You may feel a quick sting or pinch when the IV is started. The dye may make you feel warm and flushed and give you a metallic taste in your mouth. Some people feel sick to their stomachs or get a headache. Tell the technologist or your doctor how you are feeling.
The chance of a CT scan causing a problem is small.
- There is a chance of an allergic reaction to the dye (contrast material).
- If you have diabetes or take metformin (Glucophage), the dye may cause problems. Your doctor will tell you when to stop taking metformin and when to start taking it again after the test so you will not have problems.
- There is a small chance of developing cancer from having some types of CT scans.1 The chance is higher in children, young adults, and people who have many radiation tests. If you are concerned about this risk, talk to your doctor about the amount of radiation this test may give you or your child and confirm that the test is needed.
A computed tomography (CT) scan uses X-rays to make detailed pictures of structures inside the body.
Complete results usually are ready for your doctor in 1 to 2 days.
The organs and blood vessels are normal in size, shape, and location. No blood vessels are blocked.
No foreign objects (such as metal or glass fragments), growths (such as cancer), inflammation, or infection are present.
No bleeding or collections of fluid are present.
An organ is too large or too small, damaged, or infected. Cysts or abscesses are present.
Foreign objects (such as metal or glass fragments) are present.
Kidney stones or gallstones are present.
Growths (such as tumors) are seen in the colon, lungs, ovaries, liver, bladder , kidneys , adrenal gland, or pancreas.
A CT scan of the chest shows a pulmonary embolism, fluid in the lungs, or infection.
An aneurysm is present.
Blockage is found in the intestines or in the bile ducts.
A CT of the belly shows inflammatory bowel disease or diverticulitis.
Lymph nodes are enlarged.
One or more blood vessels are blocked.
A growth, fracture, infection, or other problem is found in an arm or leg.
What Affects the Test
The following may stop you from having the test or may change the test results:
- Pregnancy. CT scans are not usually done during pregnancy.
- Barium used for another test. Barium shows up on a CT scan. If a CT scan of the belly is needed, it should be done before any tests that use barium, such as a barium enema.
- Metal objects in the body. These items, such as surgical clips or metal in joint replacements, may prevent a clear view of the body area.
- You are not able to lie still during the test.
WebMD Medical Reference from Healthwise
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Kathleen Wiseman is 51-year-old mom of two, grandmother of three and a breast cancer survivor. I had the good fortune to meet Kathleen on my travels when I visited a Shoppers Drug Mart store where she works. She shared her story with me and has graciously agreed to share a bit of it with our members in the hope of helping another woman get through some of the tough days we encounter on the cancer journey. As she says, "getting back up, after you think you can't, is the most extraordinary feeling and it makes us STRONGER!" Read More
My Mother's birthday often fell on Mother's Day. I always felt it was oh-so appropriate to celebrate the most important woman in our lives on not one, but two very special occasions. When my Mom was diagnosed with cancer, though she needed our support more than ever before, it was she who offered up one of the greatest gifts of all: she showed me how to face cancer with grace and humility, and she taught me to never give up. Read More
While it's true that the physical effects of cancer are more obvious to those witnessing our journey, the things they can't see—like fear, depression, isolation, the altered sense of self—can be as traumatic and damaging. When we treat the disease without treating the whole person, we overlook a huge aspect of cancer care that can dramatically improve quality of life. Read More
For me, birthdays are a very special, and although it might sound odd to those younger than me, I love getting another yet year older! Read More
We are once again honoured to welcome a guest blogger to this space. Rose Muhr is a cancer survivor who's dedicated to giving back. Not only is she a Look Good Feel Better volunteer, but she's also passionate about highlighting the amazing strides, contributions and importance of genetics research in the fight against all types of cancers. Read Rose's story. Read More
As a long-term ovarian cancer survivor, I am thrilled that cancer that once threatened my life is gone from my body. Even now, two decades after my diagnosis, I am reminded daily of the impact of cancer on my life. I know without a doubt, that because of the positive support I received, my spirit rallied to see me through the most challenging of times. As the Executive Director of the CCTFA Foundation, I couldn't be more proud of the opportunity to support women with cancer through Look Good Feel Better and Facing Cancer Together.


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There's beauty in a cell's marriage of structure and function.
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Innovations in imaging techniques and genetic sequencing take neuroscience to a new level.
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Can emulating our early human ancestors make us healthier?
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To the great scientific leaps witnessed during our first 25 years, and the game changers yet to come.
September 1, 2011|
In the memory circuits of the aging brain and the signaling pathways of pain, science is trading mystery for mastery.


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"Our souls crave intimacy"—Erwin Raphael McManus
Sometimes singles will do just about anything to get close to someone they find interesting, intriguing or just plain irresistible.
One single woman I know drives through Starbucks daily to get her dose of caffeine. One morning as she approached the speaker to order, she noticed that the man in the truck in front of her looked very attractive. She eyed him through his rear view mirror. Wow! Handsome! Hmmm. . . I wonder if he's single. In a split second she made a plan.
"Hi. Welcome to Starbucks. What can I get started for you today?"
"Well to start, can you do something for me? Will you ask the guy in front of me if he's available?"
"You mean the guy in the truck? Suuuuuure. I'd love to. What else can I do for you?"
After she ordered her half-pump, no whip, soy, Venti mocha, she laughed at herself and thought, What in the world have I done?
She blushed as the hunky man in the truck pulled to the drive-up window. She watched as Ms. Starbucks asked if he was available. And then, in a flash, she watched as he drove away.
When she got to the window, she learned through Ms. Starbucks' giggles that he was indeed, attached, married even.
Sometimes singles—and everyone else on the planet—will go to great lengths and even make complete fools of themselves to get close to the opposite sex.
Why? Is it because our innate desire for sex? Is it because of loneliness? Desperation? Stupidity? Hormones? Of course, it can be all of the above, but the answer I'd like to focus on is: intimacy.
The human desire for intimacy, for love, drives us to do things that we never thought we would. But why, and what does it mean to be intimate?
One evening over dinner with a friend, we spoke about intimacy and what it means. She shared a cute little phrase with me to remind me of intimacy's true meaning. "It means 'in-to-me-see,'" she said. Ah yes, it's a blending of our heart with another's, so we can "see into" who they really are, and they can "see into" us.
According to Dictionary.com, intimacy is defined as, "showing a close union or combination of particles or elements: an intimate mixture."
Being intimate involves the mixing of our life with another's, a mingling of souls, a sharing of hearts. This is something we all long for because it's how God made us. We were designed to connect.
Maybe you are wondering about sex. Granted, sex is a part of intimate expression, but it is not intimacy.
In his book, Soul Cravings, Erwin Raphael McManus writes:
"Sex can be the most intimate and beautiful expression of love, but we are only lying to ourselves when we act as if sex is proof of love. Too many men demand sex as proof of love; too many women have given sex in hopes of love. We live in a world of users where we abuse each other to dull the pain of aloneness. We all long for intimacy, and physical contact can appear as intimacy, at least for a moment."
When Janet married Ryan, she was convinced that even though they were not emotionally close before getting married, that sex would change all that. After all, she'd seen the movies; she had watched television where two hearts blended into one once they became sexually involved. Sadly, she was heartbroken when the emotional connectedness she longed for didn't show up after she made it to bed.
Real intimacy is not found just by merging bodies in sex. When Jesus said, "and the two shall become one. . . " I can't help but think that He meant more than just the physical. After all, how many couples go to bed at night, share their bodies, but not their hearts? Undoubtedly, many of these people would say they are very lonely. Why? Because just as a garden hose is not the source of water, but only an expression, or vehicle for it, so sex is not the source of intimacy, but an outlet (or expression of) it. No matter how hard you try, if real emotional and spiritual intimacy does not exist before sex, it most certainly won't after.
Real intimacy makes us feel alive like we've been found, as if someone finally took the time to peer into the depths of our soul and really see us there. Until then, until we experience true intimacy, we will feel passed over and ignored, like someone is looking right through us. Sadly, we can miss out on intimacy that can make us and another person feel known, when we predetermine what we think we should see when we examine their life, heart, personality and soul. When this happens, we will try to mold and make them into who we believe they should be. As a result, we are blinded to their good qualities and love and intimacy are destroyed.
Many years ago, when I dated a young man, my mentor told me, "Shana, if you focus on all that he is not, you'll miss what he is." I've since learned that when we ignore another person's beauty and all that God made them to be, intimacy is lost. Why? Because intimacy flows out of feeling wholly accepted just the way we are.
Perhaps you are wondering how you can build an intimate relationship. In addition to accepting another person just how they are, (Note: This doesn't mean accepting any form of abuse), real intimacy can only begin once you know yourself. Since intimacy means "in-to-me-see," how can anyone "see into" you and who you are, your fears, dreams, hopes and desires unless you know who you are and are willing to allow someone in? Experiencing true intimacy begins with being connected to your own heart.
Granted, sharing who we are with others is often not easy. All love is a risk. I admit, it can be uncomfortable exposing the deepest parts of ourselves. Thankfully, you don't have to do it all at once because developing intimacy is like peeling an onion—it can happen just a little at a time while trust is developed.
Because God made us, He intimately knows us better than anyone can. For this reason, He can make us feel known in a way that no one on earth is able; and in this we can experience intimacy in an indescribable way. Intimacy with God through His Son Jesus has been the most rewarding and life-changing thing I have ever experienced.
My prayer is that you will first experience the joy that comes from having an intimate relationship with God and that out of that love you have experienced with Him, that you will find intimacy with a special someone who will make the load of walking the earth a little lighter.
In his book, Soul Cravings, Erwin Raphael McManus writes eloquently about intimacy and love. "We are most alive when we find it, most devastated when we lose it, most empty when we give up on it, most inhuman when we betray it, and most passionate when we pursue it."
Most passionate when we pursue it? Hmmm. . . it reminds me of Paul's admonition to the Corinthians in Chapter 14 verse 1: "Pursue love," he writes.
Wait a minute. Isn't love supposed to just find you, like you just "find" a hole in the middle of the street when you fall in? Sure, romance and infatuation may initially require little effort, but to experience deep long-lasting, intimate love requires a passionate pursuit, just like Paul said.
This passionate pursuit sounds vague and for that reason it seems impossible. After all, what does it mean to pursue love? Most of us have never been taught about developing emotional intimacy with another human. We've learned how to tie our shoes, do algebra, balance a checkbook, cook lasagna and maybe change the oil in our car; but no one has ever taught us how to pursue love.
Here are some basic but powerful ideas on how you can pursue love and make an art out of developing deeper emotional intimacy with those who mean the most to you. These principles can help you in your relationship with your boyfriend, girlfriend and even just your friend-friend. If you put them into practice, I'm confident that you'll even find your pursuit for emotional intimacy and true love enjoyable.
There are keys that open just about every door on planet Earth. I have one to my car door, the door to my home and even the door to my jewelry box. Intimacy is the same. There is one particular key to open the Intimacy Door in your relationships: it's called the Key of Acceptance. Because intimacy means that we allow another person to "see into" us and they allow us to "see into" them, the Key of Acceptance must be used. After all, no one wants to allow someone to "see into" their heart who is controlling, judgmental, critical, sarcastic, unforgiving, abusive, selfish or just plain nasty.
So, if you want others to open their heart to you, you've got to give them a safe to do so. Why? Because the truth is that while most of us may act like we're not afraid of anything, in the deepest part of ourselves, our hearts are very tender, fragile and generally fearful of relational pain. For hearts to thrive in intimacy, they've got to feel safe and accepted.
Here are some ways you can use the Key of Acceptance to open the door to emotional intimacy in your relationships and pursue love!
When Rebecca dated Brad, she often felt like an unaccepted alien. Why? Because whenever she told a joke, he looked at her as if she had three heads. His look said, "I don't like the part of you that is funny." He rarely joined in her humor and if he did, it seemed forced.
You may have heard it said that the shortest distance between two hearts is laughter. If you want to develop intimacy with someone special, it doesn't hurt to find your funny bone if they have found theirs. When they crack a joke, have fun! It will make your friend feel like a genius of humor and it will add an element of joy to your relationship that everyone needs.
I remember the first time someone cried with me when my heart was broken. It moved me and I knew my friend deeply loved me.
When we can cry with another person, and they can cry with us without feeling judged, a deeper intimacy develops. Yes, it takes patience and understanding not to try and "fix" the other person or their problem, but just sit with them in their pain and encourage them. Don't give them advice unless they ask. They will appreciate it and love you more for it!
True, intimacy can only be developed when we are willing to accept another person just as they are. This doesn't mean that we never disapprove of their actions, or that we never disagree with them. In fact, a certain amount of independent thinking that leads to disagreements is healthy and normal. (If disagreements are not happening, it generally means that communication is lacking because someone isn't being honest.)
In light of this truth, developing intimacy means that we have learned the art of disagreeing well while still sending the message: I love you even if we disagree. I'll still accept you if you don't accept all of my ideas. I am glad that you can share your viewpoints with me and I am not threatened by our differences, and no matter what, you'll still be my friend.
One of my dearest friends is great at disagreeing with me and making me feel honored at the same time. She knows how to tell me when she believes that I have gone off the deep end, or that I'm about ready to do something stupid. She often says that she accepts me just how I am. For this reason, I never doubt her care for me, even when we argue. I feel secure because she continually celebrates me and cheers me on in life. With that kind of support, our disagreements do not feel like a threat that will destroy our relationship. I do the same for her. We are both free to be ourselves.
Disagreements can lead to greater intimacy because opposing viewpoints mean we are being honest about who we are. However, during disagreements, remember to stay away from insulting your friend's character, manipulating or blaming. Watch what you say because the emotional safety someone feels in a relationship which feeds intimacy can be destroyed in minutes through poorly selected words.
I recently heard of a man who told his wife during an argument that the only reason he ever married her was because someone else wouldn't marry him. She was devastated. From that moment on she never felt entirely accepted and wondered if he had meant what he said.
Words can heal or sting, build up or tear down. They can be the reason for, creation of, or the demise of love and intimacy (James 3:6).
There you have it, three ways you can pursue love and use the Key of Acceptance to develop deeper emotional intimacy in your relationships. Most of all, remember to entrust your relationship to God. He is the One who made love and intimacy and knows how it works. If you want to love someone more, ask Him to help you. That's a prayer He will be pleased to answer!
When I was in elementary school, my mom purchased the Sunshine Family for me, a group of Barbie-like dolls which included mom, dad and a baby. I can't remember the commercials that were on television for my little family, but if I could, my guess is that love wasn't just in the air in the spring at the Sunshine home, but year round. Love and life never involved arguments, feeling misunderstood or romantically disconnected. In fact, my guess is that for Mr. and Mrs. Sunshine, things always felt just like they did the day they married—flowers, fireworks and fantasy.
Sadly, this picture of the Sunshine family is what many singles have of love. They idealize love and intimacy and make it into something that it's not, nor can be. Sadly, they miss out on much of the beauty of loving another imperfect soul.
Here are three ways that singles—and even married folks— idealize intimacy.
Growing up, I never saw my parents argue; it was done behind closed doors. Also, as a sensitive child, I was never comfortable with anger, so whenever my father openly expressed it, I was devastated. I'm not sure when it happened, but somewhere along the road, I made the assessment that anger was wrong and that nothing good ever came from it. I didn't realize how detrimental this attitude was until I hit my 20s and moved out of the house. Not only did I have problems in relationships with college friends, but also in romantic relationships because a relationship without conflict is just like the Sunshine Family—it's just not real.
Granted, to have a normal relationship doesn't mean that a couple will argue all the time, or disagree constantly, but some conflict is a normal part of developing authentic intimacy with another person. If it wasn't, God wouldn't give us instructions in His Word on how to handle disagreements.
In his book, The Marriage Turnaround, Mitch Temple says that conflict is not what kills marriages. Rather, it's "conflict gone wild that kills marriages."
The same is true for dating relationships. Conflict does not always mean that you are dating the wrong person or that it will kill your relationship. In fact, it can be a reason that you develop greater emotional intimacy—if you are both willing to work through your problems.
Thankfully, I have learned this powerful truth and it has been liberating. I no longer worry about making the person I am dating angry, nor do I try to be someone I am not. As a result I am more relaxed during disagreements.
I recently had a conflict with a good friend. We had to find a solution, so I asked her if she would be interested in praying independently about what was going on between us. She agreed. We went our separate ways then came back together for a discussion. I was amazed at how bringing God into our conflict deflated our egos and softened our hearts. As a result, we were able to talk about what made both of us upset. The result? You got it. Greater intimacy. I know my friend now better than I ever did before.
This is the redemptive power of conflict that can also apply to dating relationships. When handled appropriately, conflict can be the reason for greater intimacy. To achieve this, do as God instructs and handle your conflicts with tenderness. Don't blame, yell, scream, insult or give your date the silent treatment. Instead, seek to understand and to be understood. Remember that this doesn't always mean you have to agree.
Sandra is an intelligent, attractive and bubbly 30-something professional. Many people wonder why she has not married. She has wondered, too. After careful observation, Sandra's closest friends have determined that she has idealized intimacy. Not because she thinks that conflict is bad, but because she thinks differences are.
When a man who liked to paint asked her out on a date, she immediately made the assessment that they wouldn't be a good pair because he wouldn't understand her affinity for numbers and balancing her checkbook.
When a man asked her out who liked to fish, but didn't like to watch football, she decided that they wouldn't get along because she likes to watch her favorite team toss around the pigskin on the weekends.
Sadly, Sandra is missing the point. It's not necessary to have everything in common with the person you date to have an excellent relationship, nor is it possible. Frankly, I can't think of one person I have ever known that I have shared all my likes and dislikes with, can you? Granted, it's important to share some interests, but not that you share them all. The most important thing is that you enjoy one another's personalities and company; when you do, you will find common interests.
Why does Sandra have this picky perspective? Because she is terrified that her relationship will fail. As a result, and to protect herself from emotional pain, she places high expectations on what it means to be truly intimate with someone by believing that you have to have everything in common. This is simply not true.
Movies, magazines and music sell the lie that when you think someone is hot, there is going to be instant intimacy. When anyone buys into this lie, whether single or married, there will be disappointment.
Recently, while working out at the gym, I noticed that The Bachelor was on the overhead television. The reality show has one very hot man and a group of gah-gahing women who will do anything to win the Bachelor's heart. I couldn't hear the program, but could tell from the look in one of the women's eyes that she was smitten. I couldn't help but think how things would be for her if she actually won the Bachelor's affections. Would she discover that he is sometimes irritable? Indifferent? Lazy? Self-centered? Unkind? Undoubtedly, she would because no matter how attractive someone is on the outside, we all struggle with sin on the inside.
Unfortunately, many singles have bought into the idea that intimacy will be better if our date is hot like the Bachelor (or the Bachelorette). For this reason, they can miss out on opposite-sex packages that don't look as nice on the outside, but are great on the inside. Don't get me wrong, a certain amount of attraction is necessary for romantic love, however, true intimacy is not dependent on thinking that someone looks like your favorite movie star. If you are hung up on believing that you can only date "hot" men or women, try something different and say yes to someone who looks like the girl (or the guy) next door. You never know, you might just end up loving them.
There are many other ways that singles can idealize intimacy. If you struggle with any of these three things, or another that I haven't mentioned, ask God to help you understand the reason you have bought into these lies. Ask Him to show you if you fear, pride or selfishness is driving you to idealize intimacy. Then, ask Him to give you His eyes for seeing the opposite sex and romantic love according to His design. You'll be glad you did.
Last summer I cried. For two weeks, when a fresh longing for companionship erupted in my heart, my emotions were laid waste with want. I ached for emotional and physical intimacy. When I slid into bed at night, my heart yearned for a man to replace my heating pad and a friend to fill my loneliness.
During this short season of intense longing, I journaled like a mad woman, slamming honest, raw emotions onto the page that I am sure would have bled red if they could.
Now, nine months later, my raging ache for intimacy has passed and the sun of God's faithfulness shines brightly once more. Without surprise, He has proven again that I am His precious daughter—single or married. And once more I have surrendered my desire for intimacy to Him which has renewed my strength and hope (Isaiah 40:31).
Now, as a celebration of His faithfulness, I've decided to journal again, but this time in response to my summer entries as if having a conversation with myself. My prayer is that if you are struggling with a longing for intimacy that has gone unanswered, that you'll remember that you are not alone; your ache is common to every human on earth, and that God loves you deeply.
It's six months after my 40th birthday. Loneliness looms over me like a cloud that is ready to rain. Today I went to the grocery store and looked at the left hand of everyone I walked by. Most wore wedding rings. "They had someone to hold last night," I thought. I ache for physical touch and emotional intimacy.
Every day that goes by past the "Big 4-0" I wonder more and more if I will ever marry. Should I resign myself to living like a nun the rest of my life? Will the single life be all I will know until I get to heaven? What do I do with my desires? Do I resign myself to the fact that I can have a career, but I can't have a man? Do I throw myself into my work to make up for longing?
Dear Shana,
One of the most difficult things to do as time passes and the years roll by with what seems like greater speed is resting and trusting God's plan for your life, when you want to panic because you wonder if you'll ever find someone special.
Sometimes you joke that your uterus is an antique and that you're going to join a convent if you're not married by the time you are 50. Underneath your funny comments there is an ache, but do you want to marry more than you want God's plan for your life? Absolutely not. In fact, you have often told Him through tears that if I you have to choose between marriage and fulfilling His calling, that you choose His way. Do you see how this pleases God because this is an expression of faith? (Hebrews 11:6).
Remember that God loves you with agape love (the kind that has your best interest in mind—John 3:16) and that He can see the beginning of your life from the end (Psalm 139:16), therefore, He knows what is best for you. Dear daughter of God, rest in the present and do not fret about the future (Matthew 6:34), which will steal moments and days that you can't recover and make you unproductive. You would never want to finally meet your mate, then regret that you had wasted so much time complaining, would you?
Maybe it would be easier to deny my heart. After all, I know what it's like to shut down desire. I've done it before. I stop watching chick flicks because they prick at something deep inside of me. When I watch two lovers kiss, it's almost more than my heart can stand. I start watching dramas and documentaries. I focus my attention on the news, earning a living, following God's vision for my career, traveling and socializing with a wide circle of friends. These are the areas in which I feel competent. But in my most transparent and honest moments, I wonder if anyone will really see the beauty inside me.
Although I know my desires are God-given, I don't want to be desperate. So I put my longings in a closet and only let them out at night when no one can see. Like David, tears stain my pillow and I only allow small controlled bits of my ache to show in public.
Still, I ask myself, "Aren't we all just a little desperate?" Truth be told, yes, we are. People who say they are completely in control without any broken places have become detached from their hearts, which they left somewhere in the past when someone—or something—deeply wounded them.
Remember that the grief, desperation and longing that you sometimes feel are not bad. Like passion, when you will allow it, all three have the power to move you from passivity to action, from not leaning on God to crying out to Him, "Lord, help me!" In this, you glorify God, strengthen your resolve, and show others that He indeed, is real. Remember to turn to Christ in the middle of your grief and let Him bear your burdens as He has promised to do (1 Peter 5:7; Matthew 11:28).
Do you remember that one of your favorite verses is Isaiah 26:3, "You will keep in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on you, because he trusts in you"?
This verse shows that what you think about and focus on will affect how you feel, specifically that your thoughts will affect your level of peace. If you focus on not having a mate, complain about how life is not good because you are single, then you will miss out on the peace that could be yours and you'll live in emotional torment. Also, others will miss out on the joy you could give to them because you'll be self absorbed. However, if you focus (keep your mind "stayed") on the goodness of God and the truth that He is trustworthy—no matter your marital status, you will experience peace and others will be blessed.
Remember that your life is not all about you.
A true test of spirituality, trust and belief in God is to have peace within while there is none without (in your circumstances), to usher the kingdom of God into your heart through the steady, consistent concentration on the faithfulness of God.
Keep in mind that truly trusting God means trusting Him without an agenda, whether He brings you a mate or not. Be willing to do whatever He asks of you, because this is what He has called you to, to be a faithful servant. He is in on the throne of your life; you are not.
Sometimes I hurts that I've been labeled a "weirdo" by some and rejected by men because of my non-sexual lifestyle. Even Hollywood produced a movie portraying a virgin as an idiot without a brain, charisma or sex-appeal. I'm confident that I have all of the above, but sadly, many men (even self-proclaimed Christians), have swallowed the lies of our society about sex. After discussing my values, one man asked me, "What's wrong with you?" and even one man once said, "You're not normal. I don't know one woman your age who isn't sexually active."
Still, I realize there is absolutely no other way because I love God desperately. If I decide to give in to the ways of the world, I would kill my heart and wound my relationship with Christ, the One I love most. To become sexually intimate with a man without being married would not only be disobedient to God's Word, but it would be like committing emotional—and spiritual—suicide.
Dear Shana,
In this world, right has been labeled wrong and wrong has been labeled right. Just because others have sometimes labeled you "weird" does not make it so. Even Jesus was ridiculed for following His Father's plan. Do you see how your obedience is pleasing to your Lord?
Remember to focus not on what is temporal, but on what is eternal, because the things that you can see are passing away (2 Cor. 4:18). One day, you will stand before your Lord, the only One you have to please. Remember that you are living your life for an audience of One and not for the approval of others. Those who have bought into the lies of the Evil One who would tempt them to go the way of the world lose. But you, you are blessed, and you are like a vine planted by streams of living water (Psalms 1:3) because you have guarded your heart, which is the wellspring of life (Prov.4:23).
Dear daughter of God, hang tight to hope and keep trusting your Lord, the one who loves you more and better than any man ever could.
I have a confession. I really like chick flicks, movies in which Mr. Right meets Miss Right, they fall in love, experience a crisis that rips their relationship apart, then make up with a kiss.
I like these movies because they speak to a place deep inside me that longs for romantic love. However, I know I will never find total satisfaction even if I could experience the romantic love of the movies because it's not the highest aspiration of mankind or the zenith of fulfillment. If it were, then a scriptural command to love romantically would be our greatest calling. Instead, it's to love God most (Matt. 22:37-40). In His love, we can find fulfillment that no human can provide.
Take these steps to help you experience an intimate love relationship with God.
One of my girlfriends was lonely and frustrated that God hadn't delivered her greatest desire: a husband. Never married and 40, she was tired of praying and waiting and waiting and waiting, but most of all she was convinced that her life was somehow less-than. "Being single is not the abundant life!" she stated emphatically.
I certainly identified with the sometimes heart-wrenching emotions of feeling like the only girl without a date to the prom. I empathized with her loneliness, her cries late at night when only God can hear and her zillion prayers for a man she wasn't even sure exists. But the absence of abundant life?
Our conversation sent me running for my Bible where I found John 10:10.
"The thief comes to steal, kill and destroy, but I have come that they might have life and have it to the full."
The word life jumped off the page. I had to look up its meaning. In the definition, I found the prescription for my friend's sickness of heart: God Himself is the abundant life that both she and I seek—not relationship with a man. The Greek word for life is zoe (the original language) and means:
"life, referring to the principle of life in the spirit and the soul. (emphasis mine). [Zoe is] all the highest and best that Christ is, which He gives to the Saints. The highest blessedness of the creature."
Life. Inside of me. Inside of you. In the spirit. In the soul. God-given. The highest blessing we can have this side of heaven. Christ Himself.
The first step to developing an intimate (and fulfilling) love relationship with God is to admit that the abundant life He promises will never be found in another person. Instead, as the definition of zoe (life) shows, true abundant life is internal and it's found in Christ alone.
Don't get me wrong; God created us to experience human love, and romance can add a wonderful dimension to life. But romantic love will never be able to trump an intimate love relationship with God. Frankly, God likes it this way because He doesn't want any contenders for your heart; He's jealous for your affection (Ex. 34:14).
This describes my relationship with Christ. He has comforted me as I have cried, directed me, taught me, rebuked me, guided me and loved me. There have been times when I have thought that my heart would burst with emotion for Him. Who could understand the depth of my relationship with Him but me and my Savior? This is true intimacy with God: when we feel that no one else would totally understand, even if we tried to explain, because relationship with God is personal.
If you haven't ever committed yourself to a personal relationship with Him, it's not fraught with difficult requirements and religious duties. He doesn't ask that you change yourself before you commit yourself to Him; He just asks that you come as you are, confess your sin to Him, recognize your need to have your sins forgiven and accept His gift of forgiveness that He has offered to you through His death on the cross (Matt. 27:1-66, 2 Cor. 5:21). After you have done this, you can begin a life-long conversation with Him which is part of the abundance of zoe.
Just as close relationship with another person requires conversation, so relationship with God is the same. Conversing with Him happens through reading the Bible (His main way of communicating with those who love Him) and prayer (a two-way conversation between you God).
When you pray, God is not asking for a formula; He doesn't want you to pretend to be something that you are not. He doesn't want you to only praise Him, never ask Him for anything, or to say particular phrases to make yourself sound "religious." Instead, He just wants you to tell Him what is on your heart and mind, just as you would with a trusted friend (1 Peter 5:6-8).
As you pray, you will learn how to hear God's voice, just as Jesus says those who know Him do (John 10:27-29). However, remember that it takes time to learn how to accurately hear Him. Sometimes you may know He is speaking to you through the Holy Spirit, other times you may not be sure. But the more you understand who God is through His Word and your mind is changed, the more you will be able to discern when He is speaking to you and when He is not (Rom. 12:2).
When I look back on my relationship with Jesus since I came to know Him over 20 years ago, I'm not sure where I would be without other precious believers who showed me a picture of Him.
One woman befriended me and taught me a tremendous amount about Christ. She showed me His love; read the Bible (His Word) with me, encouraged me and prayed for me. Without her care and concern, I'm not sure how I would have handled many of the adversities I faced during one particular dark season.
Because being in close relationship with others who know Him is a vital part of developing an intimate love relationship with Him, Jesus prayed that those who know Him would experience the same kind of unity that He experiences with His Father. I experienced this with my friend.
If you don't know anyone who you can develop a close relationship with in this way, reach out. Ask around for a spiritual mentor, become a part of a Bible study at a Bible-believing church, or join a Christian discipleship group.
Lastly, remember that just as developing intimacy with another person takes time, so it is with relationship with God. As you grow to trust Him and believe what He says in His Word more and more, your love affair with Him will become increasingly fulfilling and the abundance of zoe will grow inside your spirit and soul.


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gilded lily. Serene stoneware duo reflects zen in mirrored golden glaze. Bloom nests a single tealight, or separates into two-part harmony to pedestal a single pillar.
Details and Dimensions
2-piece dahlia candleholder set. 9.5" dia. x 3.5"H
- Stoneware with hi-gloss golden glaze
- Stack three petal-shaped plates for a three-dimensional flower candleholder, or use separately
- Open flower holds one pillar candle; closed flower holds one standard tealight or votive candle
- Wipe clean with damp cloth
- Made in China
Overall DimensionsHeight: 3.5" Diameter: 9.5" 1St Piece Outer FlowerHeight: 2.75" Diameter: 9.5" 2Nd Piece Inner FlowerHeight: 3" Diameter: 5"
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Lotus Flowers in Gold - Aquamarine Ring
The filigree mount was popularized in the earlier 20th century. Open work and intricate lace like filaments of metal and surface pattern make for a sturdy yet ethereal lightness for the eye. Here it is set with a heavenly rectangular faceted aquamarine of approximately 6 carats. The soft and subtle hue combines well with the delicate look of the metal. Appointed well, each side has a "V" form, tiny flowers and the gallery has two lotus blossoms on each side, inspired from the Egyptian influences of the Art Deco period.
Measurements: 5/8 of an inch (1.5 cm) in length north to south on the hand and rises 1/4 of an inch (0.6 cm) in height off the finger. Weight of 4.7 grams (3.1 dwt).
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Hallmarks: "18k"
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JM: So what did you do after that?
LN: I stayed retired,
JM: Just retired
LN: And then I just got odd jobs around until I was about.
JM: Your family was raised by then.
LN: Yeah, I was 70, 71.
JM: Oh yeah, time to retire.
LN: Yeah, it got down to where we couldn't sell enough to pay the lights, let alone the rent. So I had to close out. There wasn't no way. And then the big chain grocery store put us out of the grocery business too. I quit in '81 and the grocery in about '83.
JM: So, that was about 24 years ago.
LN: Yeah, I was born and raised right here. You're sitting about where I was born. (Laughs) Ninety years old.
JM: Good roots here! Deep roots! You haven't moved other than going to the Mediterranean, really, or to Europe. You didn't live anywhere else.
LN: Europe on that. No, that little house up here and here, I tore the old home place down and built this in '45. It's been here 45 years.
JM: Wow, that's great. That is amazing to me to live so close. Just an adjustment I guess.
LN: Now I don't, I don't fit. I'm just an old man sitting here. (laughs)
JM: Well at this age, you're supposed to be, you know! And you're active in the community. I'm sure through your church, are you?
LN: I go, yeah.
JM: I know Moylen Owens. I interviewed him last year and he told me about you. He said I needed to interview you. He's got such great stories of your childhoods together, all your shenanigans.
LN: (Laughs) Shenanigans that we done!
JM: He sounds like he was pretty gullible though. Let's see now, Hilda Lewis lived here, around here somewhere.
LN: Well, you know where the, down there, the Kentucky Fried?
JM: Oh, that's right!
LN: In there, that's where Hilda was born, right there on that corner. They tore the old house down.
JM: Oh, did they?
LN: Where the restaurant is?
JM: What's it called, the High in the Pines, something like that.
LN: That's where Hilda was born.
JM: And so the Mills lived across the street and the Owens over here. Who else lived around here?
LN: The Stocks over here
JM: The Stocks
LN: And the Whipples were up on the other side of the road. Yeah, there were only about 28 families here when I was a little boy.
JM: Twenty eight. And now the Ellsworths were down here. And everybody was related to everybody.
LN: The McNeils
JM: McNeils
LN: On my side was the Nikolauses, Mills and McNeil.
JM: And then nobody married a Reidhead, huh? When did the Reidheads come here? Were they after you?
LN: No, they were here before.
JM: They were before you.
LN: They lived over in Linden before they started moving into Show Low.
JM: Do you remember? Did you do anything to do with that, what was the name of that, Chlarsons! Chlarson Sawmill?
LN: Chlarson? No we'd just buy lumber from them and they would give grocery orders to their workers and stuff like that, Chlarsons.
JM: Because they built houses for their sawmill workers, right?
LN: They did a few, yeah.
JM: A few? I know that place that nursery, the Green House? They said that was a house that was built for the sawmill.
LN: Yeah, for the sawmill workers, yeah.
JM: So, when you worked in logging you weren't in the sawmill, you were just in the woods. And then you did some hauling for them as well.
LN: No, I didn't do any hauling.
JM: Well, you said about going down to Phoenix that time.
LN: No, I just went down with them, a guy taking a load of lumber.
JM: With them, I see. So you spent your earlier years in the woods itself.
LN: Yeah, that's all I knew was woods, and dry-land farming.
JM: And dry-land farming
LN: Plowing with a walking plow and a team of horses. Over every inch with a walking plow – I plowed all this land here and up here.
JM: Now what did you do with all, you said you grew a lot of grain. It wasn't for yourself. Did you sell it?
LN: Dad sold it to Whiteriver.
JM: To Fort Apache?
LN: Fort Apache, yeah. We'd take it there. I can remember a time of going with a 25 pound sack on each side of my horse, riding across the mesa down to the gristmill that was in the creek.
JM: Oh, in Show Low Creek?
LN: Yeah
JM: Where was that?
LN: Down there, close to the White Mountains, you know, below Shumway, or this side of Shumway a little ways.
JM: Wow, that was a long ways.
LN: On the Creek there. It had enough water in those days to run a gristmill.
JM: Is that Silver Creek? Called Silver Creek?
LN: Yeah, Show Low Creek. No, Silver Creek runs into the Show Low Creek.
JM: Yeah
LN: Silver Creek is just a big spring.
JM: Okay, it was one of those. There was a community there wasn't there in those days? Do you remember?
LN: Not much there.
JM: Not much? There was some ranching, some sheep.
LN: There were some ranches, yeah. Bourdon? Bourdon Ranch. Yeah, we were there. We used to call that White Mountain Lake Daggs Reservoir.
JM: Daggs Reservoir, yes. He was the sheepman, wasn't he?
LN: Yeah, and cattleman.
JM: Wasn't he to do with the Pleasant Valley War? I think he had to do with that down there in Young.
LN: I don't know.
JM: I think his name is pulled up in that history. So then you went to school here and so you would go out to Linden and out around to get to the school.
LN: Yeah, we went down through Linden and out down by Taylor.
JM: Did you like school?
LN: Oh, pretty good
JM: Did you? What was your favorite subject?
LN: Oh, just all of them.
JM: Liked them all.
LN: (Laughs) I never was too good of a student; I played ball a lot.
JM: Oh were you? What kind of ball?
LN: Basketball
JM: Basketball, I thought, you're tall. You could do that.
LN: Yeah, I had two colleges come after me two years and I didn't take them up on it. (Laughs) The University of New Mexico and Flagstaff came after me.
JM: You didn't do it though, huh?
LN: Huh uh
JM: Why didn't you do it?
LN: I didn't want to stay in school.
JM: Oh, and leaving home
LN: Leaving home. I'd never been out of Show Low.
JM: Uh huh, Well, who knows what would have happened, huh?
LN: But they came here one time. He stayed, came in to see me and I was in bed. He stayed until daylight. Tried
JM: Tried to get you to go, huh?
LN: Yeah, that was the second year. They offered me better than a scholarship, but I didn't take it. I ended up okay.
JM: Yeah, there's always those options in our lives, you know, that we can do or we can't. As long as you're happy with how your life was.
LN: I probably wouldn't have ended up as good as I am now.
JM: Who knows where you would have ended up? You might have ended up right back here.
LN: Yeah, might have been. I don't know where.
JM: So you've seen Show Low really change.
LN: Oh man, yes. It used to be a friendly town, with good neighbors. Well, they're good neighbors now, you just don't know your neighbors. Like mine up here, I don't even know their names. It's my own fault.
JM: People don't stay as long anymore.
LN: I introduced myself to them up there but I forgot their name already. Ah, it used to be there, all of us kids would get up here on Church House Hill. This downtown chapel, and play games every week. We'd start yodeling. One would yodel to come in to get us started. They're there, and we'd all gather up there on the hill, girls and boys, everybody. There wouldn't be very many, about 25 or 30 of us.
JM: Was that when it was the church there, was the church there, or was it before that?
LN: Oh yeah, way back before that.
JM: When it was the White House there.
LN: Yeah, after the White House.
JM: After the White House, because it burned down
LN: It burned down.
JM: And so it was just empty there for a while.
LN: Yeah
JM: When did they build that church?
LN: Oh gosh, when I was, this church here, it would be back in the '50s.
JM: Oh, that late. So it was just empty for there all that time. wow
LN: Yeah, it was. They built another big one, then tore it down and built this one.
JM: Oh, I see. .
LN: It was a big long brick building
JM: So that was where all the kids played.
LN: Yeah, that's where they danced, they did everything, you know.
JM: Community place. But the school always stayed up here on the hill?
LN: Yes, uh hum. Yeah, the school was there on the hill all the time, close to home.
JM: Yeah, and then they built the other one across the street. When did they build that school?
LN: Oh, that would have been back in the '70s.
JM: Oh, that late? Oh, so everybody went to Snowflake for high school until.
LN: My daughter was one of the first ones, youngest daughter, graduated from Show Low.
JM: Oh, what year was that?
LN: That would be up in the '60s.
JM: That's kind of amazing that such a town would have to go so far to go to school.
LN: Yeah, that's where my dad had to go, down there too. But they'd have to, him and Almon Owens, Moylen's dad? They rented an old place down there, an old chicken coop and fixed it up to stay in when they went to high school.
JM: Oh, my gosh!
LN: When they went to high school.
JM: So they wouldn't have to go back and forth all the time.
LN: The only way they had back was a horse, an old horse and buggy. Riding horses.
JM: Sometimes the weather was bad. Somebody I talked to or maybe it was in an book, they just boarded their daughter out, you know, in Snowflake so she could go to school. But Moylen talks about how he had to get up early and do chores before he'd catch the bus. You probably had to do the same.
LN: I lived right here on the corner and we'd have to get up early enough to go milk the cows, you know, about 3 to 4 cows, feed 15 to 20 hogs, and be back before you caught the bus at 7:15. You'd have to be up in the dark and when you came home you'd have to do the same thing.
JM: Same thing. And then you'd took the cows across over here to pasture.
LN: Yeah, out where the airport is was the town pasture.
JM: All this before you went to school in the morning.
LN: Yeah
JM: Amazing, and you being the oldest boy, you got to do the majority of that, I'll bet.
LN: Yeah, for a while I did. Yeah, that's uh. I feel sorry for the kids nowdays. They don't have nothing to do. That's why they're hard to handle sometimes.
JM: They lose contact with the earth, because they're indoors watching TV all the time.
LN: Like my grandkids of today, the young ones. You have to fight them like the devil to even help you in the house. I think that's why so many of them are into trouble.
JM: Oh yeah, bored. And I think, I know Moylen tells this little story about how he had to go out and find some calves in a storm and stuff, but on the way home that's when he decided he wanted to be a cowboy. It's like when you're out there working in it that you get a sense of identity. You know, you feel like you belong and you're needed, and you see yourself. Where if you're always watching TV you don't see reality. You don't find your place.
LN: It's hard to find your place covering yourself, you know. You didn't have, you know, your folks didn't get after you. "You do this," "you do that." You came in, you knew you had to do it. Without saying a word you changed clothes and go do your chores, and come back and study if you've got time and don't fall asleep.
JM: Right, and your rewards were simple pleasures.
LN: Just simple.
JM: And so we fight this complex world, when what we need is simplicity in our lives.
LN: Our kids can't get together and have fun because the Law thinks they're on a drunken party.
JM: Right
LN: We tried to get, had ol' Jim Bryant, the last time, tried to get him back and run, you know, have cookouts and play games and stuff. They were on the spillway on the Show Low Lake up here. And here comes sirens from Lakeside and Show Low up there, thought they were on a big drinking party. He got them out twice and that's all. He says there's no use. So it started downhill from then, as far as getting your kids together and having a good time as a ward, or as a group.
JM: You probably need to tell people ahead of time that you're going to be doing something somewhere. Everything is done in indoors, you know. People don't go outdoors.
LN: Heck, when we were kids, we'd get together and have taffy pulls, make candy, Dutch ovens, you know, like up here on the hill. There used to be a lot of pines.
JM: Moylen said there used to have rodeos up here.
LN: Yeah, right up here on the schoolhouse hill, just the old cars in the open, you know, have rodeos, yeah, up here.
JM: Everybody would practice on somebody's
LN: (Laughs) calves
JM: Calves or horses (laughter.) Did you, you said you did rodeo, didn't you?
LN: No, I didn't. I didn't do much when I was a kid, but I did with my boys.
JM: With your sons?
LN: Yeah, with my boys. I started roping and going to
JM: That's when they were up here around at this corner
LN: Yeah,
JM: For Fourth of July things?
LN: Yeah, up here on the hill, then go to the other neighbors in the towns, you know, and rope with them.
JM: Did you go down to the Reservation and rodeo with the. . .
LN: No, I never did go down there.
JM: I hear they used to come up here and do it, so.
LN: Yeah, the old chief would, Baja? He'd come and park here up on the hill, where they used, you know about where the library is (now Police station) where the road is about where you start over the hill. They'd come up there in their wagons on the Fourth of July and park there. And then right here there used to be two pine trees. They dug a pit there, and he'd come down and help them barbeque right here, right here in front of the house.
JM: What was his name that? Was that you that? Who was it? Let's see, Moylen told me that somebody did that? Who was it that did that? Bourdon?
LN: No, it was my Dad, and Whit Ellsworth and Almon Owen.
JM: and who?
LN: Moylen's dad and Whit Ellsworth and just some of them old . . .
JM: Whit Ellsworth, who's that?
LN: That's, you know, have you heard of Marly Ellsworth? They're up there where they're building that . . .
JM: Okay, that Ellsworth that's up there. So and I heard, and he said that somebody used to make ice cream. Hansen, I think he said,
LN: Yeah, Hansen
JM: would come down and make ice cream.
LN: Yeah, they'd get their ice from the lake up there in the wintertime and put it in sawdust?
JM: Uh huh? And it would stay even on a day like this.
LN: Yeah, up into August, the first of August here, they'd still have ice.
JM: Wow, it must have been colder weather in those days.
LN: Oh yeah, we used to go up in the creek up here and get our ice at the flume, they called the flume, where the irrigation ditch had the flume across the top. We'd go out there and back our wagons out there on it.
JM: Cut it
LN: Cut it by hand and put it in there.
JM: Did you store it too?
LN: Yeah, we had it up here where the Steak and Race is, we had a place there that Dad built. Got the sawdust from the mills
JM: To cover it up
LN: About ten wagonloads would make it.
JM: This house wasn't as big then, I'm sure.
LN: Oh, no, it was just three bedrooms then. When I was 17 years old they added two more bedrooms on it. That's the house out back. No, I, and then we built all of this, a new roof. Then we had another family come in that broke down and needed some money, so I had them drywall it.
JM: Hum! That'll work.
LN: So, I got her done for about $400 cheaper. It cost me $22,000 to build this house.
JM: Wow
LN: It would now cost you over $100,000 to do it.
JM: Over $200,000
LN: And I wouldn't trade it. For all the new homes that I've been in, between the $400,000 and $500,000 homes, I wouldn't trade this straight across.
JM: Yep, you get to see everything going on in town. Now, I understand that they're thinking of moving the City Hall up here to the new library. It's going to be a little more crowded. Well it is the old part of town.
LN: Yeah, this is, right here. You take from Owens Street to Whipple, Whipple to there is the old part of town, right here.
JM: So, I live off of Whipple on the south side, there's a pasture next to me. Do you know who owned that land? That wasn't part of your land, it would have been, because it's south of Whipple Road, between Whipple and Woolford Road.
LN: South, that would have been the first one to own that would be Penrod, then two or three other guys bought. Penrod's was the first one back here. There was Brewer, was the one where you'd be.
JM: He owned a sawmill too, didn't he?
LN: No, there was a Brewer here that had a sawmill, but that was one of the older people here. He owned that other place where you're at.
JM: Do you know if they grew anything there?
LN: Oh yeah, they farmed it.
JM: What did they grow?
LN: Corn, they'd have wheat, corn, beans, and pinto beans.
JM: Good to know this, what to plant!
LN: Yeah, that's about all you can raise on it.
JM: Yeah, it seems to be prolific for weeds. Sunflowers
LN: Sunflowers would really be. That one that's up farther was my Granddad McNeil's place, Grandma McNeil. That road that goes around that makes the circle around?
JM: Woolford?
LN: Woolford. When you get out here, the one that takes you out back to Whipple Road. That on your left where it crosses, where the full stoplight is -- on that side is McNeil.
JM: They have some horses up there. Yeah, before you get to Sierra Pines.
LN: Yeah
JM: So that was McNeils
LN: McNeil's, yeah. And the Mills was on this side here where these houses are right here, was where my Grandpa Mills lived.
JM: What did he do for a living?
LN: He freighted. He was a freighter.
JM: So in those days you pretty much, you either worked, if you were going to work, you were going to work in the timber industry or you worked in freighting.
LN: Freighting, that's it.
JM: That's about it, or the . . .
LN: Sawmills
JM: Or the . . . mail route.
LN: Mail route
JM: Yeah, because Butler did that. Hal Butler's father did a mail route too, probably the same mail route.
LN: Yeah, it would be the same one.
JM: Or you had A.C.M.I. or, you know, some sort of store like Woolfords had the store too
LN: Woolfords, and Ellsworths had the one up on the corner, and across the street was the Penrods, the hotel.
JM: So it has always been a town that was dependent upon the road that came through to Fort Apache, and there were some hotels or grocery stores were pretty much to service the local people or the people coming through.
LN: All there was in those days was sawmills, freight and cattle.
JM: And cattle.
LN: Lots of cattle.
JM: Lots of cattle, and everyone had their own milk cows
LN: Their own milk cows
JM: And Moylen Owens for a while had a dairy, I guess. But mostly it was just raising cattle and selling them. Selling them either to Fort Apache or shipping them up to catch the railroad to go east or west.
LN: Yeah, especially when the railroad came in to McNary they had a place out here, corrals and stuff.
JM: Belle Siding?
LN: Belle Siding
JM: And there was another place, oh, over there by Silver Creek again. What was the name of that place? Anyway, there were pens there. Now you worked with the LDS farm, too, didn't you? What was the name of that? Did I get that right?
LN: When they had gardens?
JM: Was it gardens? Where they had cattle, a ranch?
LN: Oh yeah, I worked out on the Church Ranch
JM: Church Ranch, yeah. So what did you do there?
LN: I just helped them round up and ship.
JM: So you pretty much left the cattle to do their thing, and then once a year you'd go round them up.
LN: We'd just go check on them. The guys that was over them would have to check on them and then when they needed somebody to round them up and move them from one pasture to another, that's what I'd do. I did that for over twenty years.
JM: Wow, so there would just be a call that they needed people to come and round up.
LN: Yeah just a call, all free gratis.
JM: Did you guys make any special, I mean, you just did the job and then you came home?
LN: Yes, and once in awhile they'd have somebody bring out something to eat, you know.
JM: I was wondering if you were into the Dutch oven cooking. It seems like you hear that people around here did a lot of Dutch oven cooking. That would be fun.
LN: Oh yes, that's good eating.
JM: Yes. Yes. We're thinking about doing one of those for the Museum as a fundraiser this summer over at Moylen Owens place. You might hear about it later.
LN: Yeah, I've talked to him about it.
JM: I think uh, who's doing it? Louis Rawlings is going to, I think is going to head that up.
LN: Yeah, he kind of fell for that Dutch over stuff when he first came here, you know. He's in on it now. He's a good biscuit maker.
JM: Well can you think of something else I need to ask you about? That we haven't touched on?
LN: No, its uh, hum.
JM: So you didn't do any hunting. Did you do any fishing?
LN: Yeah, I fished.
JM: Did you do a lot of fishing? Where did you fish at?
LN: Just out here at Mormon Lake, just out east of town here, and down here in the creek, and then up on the rivers on the Reservaton.
JM: Did you ever go to Hawley Lake?
LN: No, I never did go to Hawley Lake.
JM: It's a little farther up the road there, and so there's lots of little lakes around here. So what did you catch? What did you catch here?
LN: Mostly catfish. Down here in the creek you'd have them ol' catfish, the little ones, Steelheads? They didn't get very big, carp and suckers down here in the creek.
JM: Yeah, more fun to do than to eat.
LN: Yeah, but Mormon Lake was the fishing hole, them ol' yellow-bellies? Cats! Man, when we'd go out to get our cattle, you know, to milk in the evenings, we'd bounce out there on the horse, and we'd have our old willow poles stuck out there in the cedars. And we'd catch us half-a-dozen to a dozen catfish and put them in a gunnysack and tie them on the back of the saddle and come home, bring our cows with us.
JM: Make a good day of it? Did you have to clean them, or did you make your mother?
LN: No, we cleaned them. She'd have them, we'd have them for breakfast.
JM: Breakfast fish
LN: Yeah, have them for breakfast, if there was any left over. We could eat one or two apiece.
JM: Not real big ones, huh?
LN: No, they only got about so long. Yellow bellies, we used to all call them.
JM: I don't know what that would be.
LN: Catfish
JM: Well, it sounds like a fun life.
LN: We had lots of water in them days. The rains would take care of a thousand head of cattle, where now it would a hundred. And all the cowboys are gone. There's only what, two people now? Larry Whipple and Elroy Ellsworth are the only two that's got cattle left.
JM: Oh really? Elroy Ellsworth does too.
LN: That's in Show Low. There are more people that have got cattle down in Taylor, more cow people, the Flakes.
JM: And that's where the rodeos seem to be now too, in that area.
LN: In Taylor, yeah, that's where it is now.
JM: Not a lot of horses either, just the horses you see out here on the meadow.
LN: Not many horses left, but that's the only ones that have got cattle anymore. I don't know if any of the Rhotons in Lakeside have got any cattle yet or not, I don't know. Most all the range that way now, clear back to Porter Mountain, are all bought up for subdivision land.
JM: Oh really? Yeah, I know there's a big development going on I don't even want to know about. So, did you ride around a lot out there when you were kids? Out there by Porter Mountain?
LN: Yeah, quite a bit, yeah, not quite as far as Porter Mountain, but close.
JM: Well, okay, that's about all I can think of, unless you can think about something else.
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BMC Racing Team's Philippe Gilbert spent more than 140 kilometers in a breakaway Monday at the Vuelta a España, only to see his group caught in the final 10 kilometers of the first of nearly a dozen uphill finishes in the three-week race.
First Difficult Finish
Steve Morabito was the BMC Racing Team's best finisher, placing 21st, 50 seconds behind stage winner and new race leader Alejandro Valverde (Movistar Team). Directeur Sportif John Lelangue said the difficult finish provided a glimpse of Morabito's form. "He did a good job fighting to save every second," Lelangue said. "He's 16th on the GC (1:12 back) and we are only in the first Monday. There are three weeks remaining. Looking to the stage and how difficult it was, he and Brent Bookwalter and Amaël Moinard did a good job." Bookwalter and Moinard finished 66th and 67th, respectively, 3:22 and 3:23 behind the stage winner.
Good To Be In The Break
Gilbert was best-placed overall of the eight riders in the breakaway that escaped the peloton five kilometers into the 155.3-kilometer stage. After their lead peaked at close to five minutes, they were still two minutes in front with 20 km to go. But Gilbert said he knew the move was doomed not to survive. "I've been a professional for 10 years so I know the races," he said. "I know when it's possible and when it's not. It's always good to be in the front and show the jersey. At least we tried. Maybe one day it can be good."