text:
| 3.9°C Belfast
Britain's three main political parties are set to deliver a warning to the voters of Scotland that they will not be able to keep the pound if they vote for independence.
Chancellor George Osborne is expected to rule out an independent Scotland joining a formal currency union with the UK when he publishes the latest Treasury analysis of the issue tomorrow.
It is expected that it will be followed by statements from shadow chancellor Ed Balls for Labour and Treasury Chief Secretary Danny Alexander making clear that their parties would not allow Scots to retain the pound.
Scotland's Deputy First Minister Nicola Sturgeon said it was the "Westminster establishment" trying to lay down the law to Scotland and warned that the move would backfire.
Throughout the day, however, senior figures from the UK parties were making it increasingly clear that they would not countenance a currency union with Scotland.
Speaking on LBC radio, Mr Balls said that it would be "very difficult indeed" to see how such a currency union could work.
"(Scotland's First Minister) Alex Salmond is trying to pretend he can go a step further and become a separate independent sovereign state, but he wants to also pretend to the Scottish people that somehow he can keep all the benefits of the union - it won't make any difference - and that's just not in the real world," he said.
"I don't think it's right for us to tell Scotland what they must do, but I don't see how you could have a negotiation about a Scottish separate country keeping the pound which would add up either for Scotland or for the rest of the United Kingdom."
Mr Alexander said that he head repeatedly made clear that it was "highly unlikely" that a currency union could be made to work either for Scotland or the rest of the UK.
"I stand by that analysis and those statements," he told LBC.
For the Tories, Treasury Minister Sajid Javid said the SNP's plan for a currency union without fiscal or political integration "lacks any credibility whatsoever".
"Scottish trade is important to the UK economy but it is not clear it is important enough to run the risk of recreating the problems in the euro area in the British isles," he told a Commons Westminster Hall debate.
"The remaining UK, to manage the risks of the union, would need to set interest rates and need to maintain oversight of an independent Scotland's tax and spending plans. Indeed, a currency union would also be likely to undermine an independent Scotland's resilience and credibility.
"Just as a currency union isn't in Scotland's interests, it is very hard to see how it could be in the interests of the remaining United Kingdom. It would involve the remaining UK giving up an element of its economic sovereignty... which is something the public would feel very strongly about.
"It would increase the risk of having to bail out Scottish banks, and the idea of putting the remaining UK's economy at risk because of another country's banks, just as we are getting our own banks into order, would make no sense whatsoever."
The BBC reported that the Treasury paper will argue that for an independent Scotland to continue to use the pound, the Scottish and UK governments would have to agree to u nderwrite each other's banks, a llow taxpayers in one country to subsidise the other, and reach broad agreement on tax, spending and borrowing levels.
Ms Sturgeon accused the UK parties of "bluff and bluster" which would not impress voters in Scotland.
"This is an unprecedented and extraordinary bid by the Westminster establishment to lay down the law to Scotland, which will backfire spectacularly," she said.
"But the reality is the Tory Chancellor and his Labour and Lib Dem helpers are all over the place, with their briefing fast unravelling.
"First we were told George Osborne was going to rule out a currency union, but now it is being reported that he will outline a Treasury paper with a series of tests and conditions which would be their starting point in negotiations to secure a sterling area.
"That is a very long way from what was initially briefed, and simply underlines the fact that the Treasury themselves know - whatever the bluff and bluster of Westminster politicians - that a shared sterling area is overwhelmingly in the rest of the UK's economic interests following a 'yes' vote."

subset: commoncrawl


text:
You're read manga online Yume Maboroshi no Gotoku Chapter 6 at MangaOta.com. We'll do our best to bring you the finest, latest manga everyday. Enjoy
If you can't read any manga and all the images die completely, Please change to "Image server" !
You're read manga Yume Maboroshi No Gotoku Chapter 6 online at MangaOta.com.
You're reading Yume Maboroshi No Gotoku - Alternative(s) : 夢幻の如く ; Like a Dream - Author(s) : Motomiya Hiroshi already has 418,716 views.
Last Updated: May / 24 / 2019 13:46


text:
Former straight-A student says her addiction cost her her children and herself
Two years ago, Jessica Moon walked into the Bradenton sheriff's station at 3 a.m. in tears.
"I had a warrant out for my arrest, and I was done," the 25-year-old said.
Moon, a former straight-A student, had succumbed to drug addiction. Like a row of toppling dominos, the effects were fast, far-reaching and unstoppable.
"I started using, and in six months, I lost everything — my kids, my car, myself," she said, "Before that I never got in trouble."
Moon was never prescribed the drug she was so highly addicted to: Roxycodone. Known as "Roxies" on the street, Moon says she was introduced to them by an abusive ex-boyfriend.
She describes the relationship as "the typical domestic violence situation." She was being hit every day, and Roxycodone was an easy and welcome escape.
But the break was short-lived and quickly exposed her to more danger. After a night of partying in Miami with a friend, Moon was raped and became pregnant. Although a rape kit was administered, the DNA collected did not return a hit, and her rapist was never caught.
"That was my rock bottom," she said.
Moon was wanted on a warrant for violation of probation stemming from a grand theft charge and shortly thereafter made the decision to turn herself in to police.
She was six weeks pregnant when she went to jail and spent two months incarcerated before being accepted into First Step's Mothers and Infants program.
The 12-bed residential program serves about 35 mothers a year, and about 95 percent of those women are court-referred. However, the program takes referrals from anyone and anywhere. "We want them to have a drug-free birth," Clinical Director of Special Services Campus Nancy Page said, "That is our ultimate goal."
But the program reaches far beyond birth. Mothers are provided parenting and life skills, counseling, transitional planning, and vocational development.
In Moon's case, First Step helped her cope with the gut-wrenching loss of her two eldest children to adoption and gave her the confidence to know that if drug-free, she could successfully raise her infant daughter.
Moon's 32-year-old sister adopted her other two children, now ages 3 and 4. They were 8 months and 2 days old at the time her parental rights were terminated.
"I wouldn't tell people. I was devastated," she said. "Now I'm able to handle the situation. They call me 'Aunt Jessica,' but that's OK with me because I'd rather be around."
Moon now lives with her mother and works full-time at McDonald's, neither of which she says would have been possible without recovery and First Step.
"It's an awesome program; they saved my life."
To stay on track with her sobriety, Moon attends five Alcoholics and Narcotics Anonymous meetings a week and talks with her First Step counselor a few times a month.
She was a guest speaker at last month's legislative breakfast hosted by the Community Alliance of Sarasota County, and her next goal is to enroll and complete the cosmetology program at Manatee Technical Institute.


text:
I really wanted Emma to be a Pumpkin for Halloween. Mike and I were both pumpkins when we were toddlers and I love the idea of the classic costume. However, a couple of weeks ago someone asked Emma what she was going to be for Halloween - Cinderella. Humph.
I knew if I still wanted her to be that sweet little punkin' I had envisioned, it would be a struggle. Yes, I'm sure I could coax her in it for 10 minutes, but she wouldn't be excited - there would be no thrill for her.
Emma loves pink, she loves dresses, she loves jewels and she loves shoes, and I knew that if I made her a big poofy pink princess dress complete with jewels and pink shoes she would light up. And, well, that's what we live for, right?
UPDATE : Here is the reveal of Emma in her dress!
I was a little intimidated by making a dress from scratch - I don't know how to install zippers and every time I try to make her a piece of clothing the proportions seem to be off. I wanted this dress to look like a real dress, but be something she would be comfy in and could play dress up with for the next year or so.
So, I started with a cotton twill dress I found at GapKids for $8 - it was on clearance. I thought it would work perfectly as a structure, as my plan was to just put on a fancy pink facade.
I started by putting a hem in the bottom of the pink fabric for the skirt, then pinning it onto the dress, overlapping it every couple of inches to make pleats. *Please note, I am not a professional seamstress, so I realize my techniques are not perfect, but I just did what I needed to do to try to make something cute... maybe I'll inspire you to try it.
I stitched (with a machine) around the waist, then trimmed the excess fabric.
Next, I pieced the top together, allowing extra fabric to fold over the seam around the neck and arm holes.
I should also tell you that I left the zipper in the back and just allowed extra fabric to fold over it to hide it.
Done! I'm going to wait until Halloween for the big reveal when she goes dressed for her school party, but you can see a tiny peek below.
UPDATE : Here is the reveal of Emma in her dress!
Pretty Pink Princess Slippers... we bought them a couple of sizes too big so she can get them on and off herself.
I loved how excited she was to try on her dress - let's just hope she doesn't want to wear it to church!


text:
PACK AND GO! Pick up your pack, then off you go! That's what PACK is all about: Everything you need on your travels has been included in the lightweight travel collection – ultralight and packs up small. Leave the baggage at home and discover the world.
Packs away
extremely small
All PACK products are not only ultra-light, they are as compact as possible, giving you more space for your experiences. Jacket, shirt or trousers can be packed away in your PACK within seconds,


text:
Okay, so back in June I was having copulatory ED with a partner and decided to start the reboot process. The first few weeks were typical. Shrinkage and no libido. By the end of the first month, I came across an article that said prone-position masturbation causes some of the same ED problems as masturbation. Except for a handful of instances in my life, I have always masturbated in the prone position. I decided to try and masturbate the normal way for once. When I did, it was exhilarating, and I felt like I had turned a corner. From that point forward my libido began to increase, as did the size of my genitals. Spontaneous erections, both partial and full were common. I started masturbating on occasion, and also began mutually masturbating with a girl I knew over Skype. I have not gone back to prone masturbation since.
By August, I thought I was mostly cured, if not completely. But then the chaser effect kicked in. First I caved, and began watching some soft core porn. Then I masturbated to hardcore porn on 3 separate occasions. Though I didn't immediately notice any physical side effects, I knew that I was messing up all the work I had accomplished. I had two more relapses, only each time, the type of porn I masturbated to was subsequently less hardcore, in a an attempt to ween myself off porn again completely. It should also be noted that while I had powerful erections masturbating alone without the aide of porn, and masturbating with a partner on Skype, I had difficulty maintaining an erection while masturbating to porn.
By the end of my last relapse, I decided to reboot again. It's been 6 days, and I feel like I'm back to square 1. I am dead from the waist down, experiencing shrinkage, with no libido whatsoever. I've had a couple of (barely) partial-errections (usually in the morning), but that's it. On day four I met a girl and we went home together. We made out, and I experienced some partial erections, but I was afraid that they weren't strong enough to do the deed, and as her hand crept down my pants I had to stop her, and tell her that I couldn't have sex.
I am supposed to see this girl again in 10 days after she gets back from vacation. I would like to function normally sexually by then, but I'm afraid it won't be enough time to reboot, and that possibly the anxiety over being able to get it done is making things worse. What should I do? I'm feeling more frustrated than ever before.
Sorry to hear about this.
I have a question. How many days was you original reboot? How many days of no porn, and days of no masturbation?
From your description it's clear that your reboot was too short. A reboot is more than just your penis starting to properly function. Rebooting is a time-out that allows your brain to heal so that you are far less vulnerable to cravings and relapse.
I'm going to use this opportunity to educate any other readers. For those new to this forum, returning to porn leads only one place - back to addiction and ED. And for any newbies reading, rebooting does not mean you are back to square one. Addictions sensitize the brain, so that porn pathways may exist for years, and reactivating them may lead to a full blown addiction.
It's like an athlete returning before they are fully healed only to reinjure the same knee ligament. The only difference is that former porn addicts can no longer play this game.
I have no idea when you will be back in the saddle.
From June 17 until sometime
From June 17 until sometime in mid-August without porn. I'm trying to pinpoint the exact date. Might have been August 13?
I went without masturbating until maybe July 20?
Thanks for the answers
So about one month without masturbation, then back to occasional masturbation, then eventually to porn and masturbation.
The fact that you had success means you can again. If you mix in sex/masturbation that will affect the time-frame for recovery, but everything related to porn recovery is an experiment. Hopefully you are not back to zero
Can't have your cake and eat it to
One thing all of us who have recovered is that there is no such thing as good or safe porn. No only that, but it is incredibly easy to fall back into the habit and use a variety of illogical thinking to get there.
I've said this before in this forum. Real sex with a real women isn't like porn videos. It's not always about "performing" or measuring exactly how your penis is working. There is an emotional part to sex that the videos never show.
Your struggle is common to many of us regardless if we have rebooted/recovered. But you need to start by admitting your problem and stop making excuses to view porn or masturbate. Think of it this way, an alcoholic doesn't dry out and then just drink 3.2 beer. Doesn't work.
Seeing as you've already
done some work, you may be able to have sex by the time she gets back. But it's also okay to take it slowly. And it's okay to tell her what you're up to as well. Waiting together and enjoying other flirty, sensuous contact is a lot more fun than waiting alone. Here's an FAQ on girlfriends and rebooting, which I just added to another thread: http://yourbrainonporn.com/what-do-i-tell-my-new-girlfriend
Update: I talked to her on
Update: I talked to her on the phone and had a really strong erection, just from the sound of her voice. Maybe I'm in better health than I thought? Still....I don't want to relapse again. I have to be committed. This has definitely shown me the reason I wanted to quit this addiction in the first place.
Of course you're getting better
Just know that your gains won't necessarily stabilize on your schedule. So just keep going whatever happens in 10 days.
Update: Two Weeks of great sex then ED
I never ended up writing a follow up to this, but now that this relationship has ended (for reasons that have nothing to do with sex) I thought I'd post about what happened.
When she came back, we started having sex, and my penis was working just fine. We would have sex everyday, sometimes twice a day for about 2 weeks. After a while though, I started having trouble maintaining an erection again, and the ED slowly came back. I'm not sure why this happened, though I have one theory. During the second week we were going to the beach a lot, and on this particular beach, there were a lot of topless women. Naturally I fantasized a little bit about these women, which may have set me back. Also, though I did not have full-blown porn-fantasy, I do remember making a decision while on the beach that I would watch porn at some point in the future. Maybe that had something to with this? Or maybe I am not completely cured? Or maybe my problem extends further than porn. Nevertheless, I've never read an account of a situation similar to mine.
Since then I relapsed pretty badly, and now I'm 9 days in with no PMO, hoping to give it another go. There is another girl I am interested in, but my sex drive is still pretty low (though I have had a few partial erections in the morning). I'm very scared about pursuing this woman as a result.
Thanks for the update
Sounds like you got out of your hospital bed and tried to run a marathon. Maybe try having sex less frequently, even after things are working again. Put the emphasis on sensual touch during some encounters, rather than just getting each other off. For more: http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/cupids-poisoned-arrow/200909/the-laz...
The longer you can consistently avoid porn, masturbation, fantasy and orgasm, the faster your brain can regain its normal sensitivity. Maybe watch Gary's vids again: http://yourbrainonporn.com/
But keep in mind that even when you are back to normal, you will still be vulnerable to the slippery slope of desensitization. If it happened once, it will happen again. Masturbation without porn or porn fantasy may not be a problem, but Internet porn probably always will be.
I mean, does my recovery
I mean, does my recovery trajectory seem normal in comparison to others' stories? It's depressing to think I'll never be back to normal, even if I do manage to give up porn.
Why the discouragement?
I see no reason for that. Seems to me your results have been quite good, given your inconsistencies. You'll continue to improve. Just take care not to exhaust your sexual desire when with a partner. It promotes the use of porn fantasy and overrides your normal libido.
Listen to your body. It'll tell you when it needs a rest and when it's ready for more. You're not a machine or a porn actor on Viagra. Just saying...
another update
I'm at day 33. No relapse except I masturbated once, but not to porn. Haven't really felt the chaser yet. I'm getting erections every now and then in the morning, but with varying degrees of hardness. My libido is not very strong and I don't feel much cured yet.
I thought of something that may help me get over this faster, and I was wondering what you guys thought of it, and if it was worth experimenting with. A big reason for abstaining from porn, as I understand is to weaken its connection to sexual arousal and the body and mind. If not doing something can weaken this connection, then what can I do to strengthen more positive connections?
I started thinking about the history of my problem. I didn't start having erectile problems until I got accesses to streaming fast porn (although I used porn since I was 14, but not necessarily on a regular basis, and definitely not to the extreme that I would use it later on when I turned 28). Every time I had passing ED problems before my major last straw earlier this year came after a break-up after a few months spent masturbating to internet porn several times a day. As soon as I'd found a woman it would be difficult to perform the first few times.
I thought back even further to try and remember the opposite of this. I had very vivid feelings of a certain indescribable sensation I felt with other women who I no ED problems with prior to extreme porn abuse. This euphoric sensation came from kissing, and lesser forms of physical touch. Holding hands, barely brushing up against each other. Simple touches. Time spent together. Gazing into eyes. I remember this great sensation that came with all this, very different from the satisfaction my brain derived from porn, but all together more satisfying. I remember how a simple conversation or even text from a girl could send waves of positive sensations through me.
About a week or two ago, something interesting happened, when a girl I was flirting with suddenly became touchy-feely with me. Nothing too extreme, just sitting close to me, touching and talking. I started recalling this very vivid sensation from the past, and enjoying it deeply. it then dawned on me. Is it possible to chase after this feeling? Would it be a smart idea to actively seek out this kind of contact and sensation?
Yes, it would
Contact with women is very healing during a reboot. The kinds of contact you found arousing are precisely the kinds of contact your brain looks for...not just to fertilize her...but because it finds such contact delicious and soothing. It reduces anxiety. So touch, kissing, dancing, smiling, flirting, eye contact, skin-to-skin contact, hugs, massage, watching a movie with your arms around each other...all those things are excellent.
Sex is a bit more problematic. If you're single, it's not necessarily helpful to rush into sex with a partner you don't feel comfortable and safe with. It can put too much performance pressure on you. Stress isn't good for erections. Relaxation is. So the more you engage in bonding behaviors with a potential mate, the more relaxed you'll feel.
Early in a reboot, sex with orgasm can kick in an uncomfortable chaser. http://yourbrainonporn.com/do-you-need-a-chaser-after-sex Later in the process, it may actually be helpful. There are no fixed rules for that.
So yes...female company is great. Just don't let her push you too far too fast. Let your body tell you when it's time.
More on the power of bonding behaviors: https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/cupids-poisoned-arrow/200909/the-la...
It's great to have contact with women, along with any feelings
that arise. So a big yes. Really get this simple concept - you hadn't fully recovered whne you jumped into sex/orgasms. Your dopamine signalling was deficient, the dopamine high from a new relationship gave you just enough boost to get the job done. You cratered because you brain was not fully healed, and you returned to porn because your brain was craving more dopamine.
Another Update:
Day 46:
Last Friday I met up with a girl who I have had a crush on for a few years now. We hung out and at the end if the evening we kissed a few times. I made note of certain aspects of the interaction, like the way our hands touched, the way she ran her hand through my hair after it was over. It was very nice and sensual. Since then, I get into that blissful state just thinking and reflecting on it. I hope this is a good thing.
I'm having morning erections almost every morning, sometimes very hard, sometimes, not so hard. Today I lay in bed thinking about this girl, and I was fantasizing a little bit. But it wasn't porn fantasy. I would fantasize about our moment, but also about real-life past sexual experiences with other women. I hope this fantasy is not hampering the process to recovery.
The whole thing has given me an incredible and much needed surge of confidence. I'm not sure yet if sex will be a possibility with this woman, if she wants to continue, or how fast or slow she's willing to take things if she does. This gives me some anxiety in that I may not be able to perform when the time comes. In lieu of my past experiences, should I take sex off the table for now as an option?
Nothing wrong with
recalling feelings of bliss, or fantasizing about a real girl, Remember, this addiction is to screens, not people. If you are worried about being unbale to maintain an erection, then you may want to wait. Nothing wrong with waiting, either.
"I didn't start having erectile problems until I got accesses to streaming fast porn"
Same here.
Before that, it would take a while to download movies.
Opening several tabs and watching high definition POVs was not possible.
Stupid streaming sites grrrrr...
Day 58: Tried to M today to
Day 58:
Tried to M today to see if the sensitivity is back. A lot has returned, but I couldn't get fully erect, and I was unable to O. :(
I guess I'm not finished rebooting. What can I possibly be doing wrong?
How old are you?
And did you have sex with a real person before highspeed Internet came along? It seems to be the latter that correlates most with needing a bit longer. It's very unfair, but seems to have to do with wiring to "the wrong cues" during adolescence.
Have you read this? http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/cupids-poisoned-arrow/201110/why-sho...
Just be patient. Improvements will continue. Also, time around real potential mates seems to help the brain get the right ideas. Can you take a dance class? Get a therapeutic massage? Find places to flirt?
Another update....
Day 68:
Good news and possibly bad news. I've been hanging around a lot more women recently, trying to strengthen the positive connections in my brain. Three days ago especially, I had an incredible evening out with a lovely lady, and though we didn't really touch or kiss or any of that stuff, I felt a strong positive connection, and I'm sure it had a very positive effect on my physically. Coasting off these good spirits, I decided to masturbate in the morning to test the waters.
I don't know if this was a good idea, but everything worked relatively fine this time. I was very pleased with myself and this carried out throughout the day, and the next morning, I woke up with one of the most raging hard-ons I've had in a while. It kept coming and going, and at some point was the hardest it had been since my last relapse in October.
The only problem is, that night I felt the surge of the chaser effect and briefly peeked in at some softcore stuff. I didn't look at anything for more than a couple of seconds, but it's scary how close I was to a relapse, and how much my body was telling me to relapse. Today when I woke up I didn't feel as hot.
I have to keep vigilant about relapse. I'm not out of the woods yet. I'm going to continue not masturbating. I only hope these momentary lapses haven't hindered my progress.
In other news, I'm feeling much more confident about my ability to O with a woman should the opportunity arise. I'm not pushing for this yet, and I certainly want to take things slow yet, but I'm definitely not as afraid as I was a few weeks ago.
By the way, am I using the proper thread for all these updates?
Any thread
is fine. You can also use your own blog.
That all sounds very good, actually. Especially the fact that you saw the chaser in action and managed to resist (more or less...).
Glad you're feeling confident. Were you able to masturbate without porn fantasy when you tried it?
When can you see her again?
There was fantasy but not
There was fantasy but not porn fantasy. Just remembering the night before/ past real-life sexual experiences.
I don't know when I can see her again, as she's in the process of moving back into town, and I'm in the process of moving away. There is a good chance our paths might cross before then. If anything, I'd like to call her on the phone soon and have a nice long chat.
Almost forgot to mention,
Almost forgot to mention, there was a wet dream almost exactly a week ago, which was one of the first intense ones I've had since the October relapse!
Day 73: Oh man, this chaser
Day 73:
Oh man, this chaser effect has been kicking my ass all week long. I can't remember the last time I felt a stronger urge to look at porn. I'm getting heavy flashbacks and triggers constantly. The only thing so far keeping me from it is the fact that I don't think I've ever gone this long without watching it, and I want to see how far I can take it. But man oh man, the temptation is killing me!
Try a few
Cold water treatments. http://yourbrainonporn.com/cold-water-technique
Red X is good too: http://yourbrainonporn.com/other-techniques-for-rewiring
Nice avatar!
Day 80 (maybe):
So, with my last update there were a lot of urges stewing up inside my head. Things became quite unbearable. Every image of a woman was an intense trigger. In my weakest moments I peeked at porn or porn-like imagery. This all culminated about 2 or 3 days ago when I decided to test and see if all this was having any effect on my progress. I tried to masturbate without porn or porn fantasy. I realize now that it was all these mental triggers that made me want to do this, not my actual body. What happened was that I could not achieve a full erection this way. What happened next was even worse. I went to listen to a relaxation tape, and decided to masturbate to the female voice. Not only did I achieve a fully intense erection, I was also able to orgasm with no problem.
Afterwards, I felt terrible. It wasn't porn, but it felt like I had relapsed. 70-plus days down the drain. I was disappointed, and I never want to do that again. BUT, I decided to re-evaluate and see what I did wrong. I realized it was all these internet images that were making me so crazy. I've since disabled ALL images from my computer and aim to keep it this way indefinitely (as long as I can until I absolutely NEED to look at images for work).
Nevertheless, I thought I was back at square one, but something amazing happened. Though the next morning I didn't wake up with an erection, every morning since I have, and some of them are pretty strong and healthy. Even after naps this happens. Also, whatever chaser effects I was feeling are for the most part totally gone. So it appears that the relapse hasn't set me back in any noticeable way. I think part of the reason for this is that I've been hanging out with a lot of women lately. Merely being in their presence does wonders for my health, I think. There is even one girl who I have been sleeping with. There is no sexual contact and no cuddling either, but we sleep in the same bed, and I think it's helping me immensely. I also find myself engaging in a lot of positive fantasy. Like this one girl I hung out with two nights ago, I kept thinking about her and imagining what it would be like to kiss her. This is progress because I haven't had this kind of fantasy in so long.
So I'm not sure if I should set the clock back. Am I really at day 80? I'm unsure of that, but this incident hasn't affected me as negatively as my last few relapses. No depression. No noticeable loss of libido. I feel unusually positive, but nevertheless, vigilant.
Just keep rolling
You're doing fine. Interaction with women is very, very good for you guys. Smart move.
Day 83: Woke up in the
Day 83:
Woke up in the middle of the night with a super hard erection, and the muscles seemed to contract in the same way as immediately before one ejaculates. I didn't ejaculate but this muscle contraction continued even as the penis began to soften, but eventually it went away and I went back to sleep. When I awoke, no morning erection. It made me wonder about a couple things.
83 days in, and I still don't have very many spontaneous erections during the day. They have all come either in the morning, or after a nap of some kind. If anything I'll feel a stirring sensation down below, but it's never enough to lead to a full erection and only sometimes enough to lead to a weak one. These stirring sensations seem to only come if I'm thinking about something sexual or romantic.
Sometimes I sleep on my stomach, and I used to masturbate in the prone position, which I stopped during my last re-boot, as I heard it's bad for you. I'm worried though that all my erections are actually the result of some involuntary prone-like behavior while asleep on my stomach. If that's the case it could be hindering my progress. Should I try not sleeping on my stomach at all? I know this may be impossible because I tend to involuntarily change positions in my sleep, but I'm wondering if sleeping positions has ever played a factor in anyone else's recovery.
I don't know much about
the prone challenge, but I think contact with potential partners might show you that you're farther along than you think. Did you see this FAQ? http://yourbrainonporn.com/how-do-i-know-when-im-back-to-normal
Random erections don't mean much for some guys.
Day 92: I've been
Day 92:
I've been experimenting with masturbation. I'm wondering whether or not this is a good idea. I'm trying to do about once a week. How do I know if I'm far along enough to be doing this?
Who knows?
What's what you're figuring out now. Did you read this? Might help. Or not... http://yourbrainonporn.com/are-there-any-guidelines-for-healthy-masturba...
Let us know how it goes. No fantasy. The less the build-up, the less the chaser kicker. You can always add more heat later, but start gently and sensually and with an empty mind.
Day 106 Relapse for real. I
Day 106
Relapse for real. I hate myself so much for this. All my progress right down the drain. I will never get over this.
I doubt that
Just start again. BTW, here's a new article Gary wrote that will help you understand why porn can still yank you around by the nuts.
Let us know how you get on. Be gentle with yourself. If you really learned what you need to this time, it will have been well worth it. Porn is poison for some of you. And will be for a long time, perhaps indefinitely. Just think of it as an allergy. :O
What's worse is that even
What's worse is that even when I masturbate to porn it's hard to get a full 100% erection. I'm really fucked up.
Guess you have
a bit of rewiring to do still. Stay optimistic.
*big hug*
Here's an update, since I've
Here's an update, since I've been gone for so long. The last 3 months have been a whirlwind of relapse, but for what it's worth it's been 29 days since I've last masturbated to porn. I sometimes have problems peeking every now and then, but I feel positive about not needing porn or being as dependent upon it as I was, say, a year ago.
I have been trying to masturbate every 10 days or so, which I don't know if it's a good thing or not.
With my current masturbation habits, I've noticed that I have trouble getting erect whenever I masturbate without any visual stimuli or fantasy. In fact it takes me about 10 to 15 minutes it seems to achieve erection when I do this. I am not employing "death grip" but I worry that my strokes might be a bit faster than healthy, although I am not sure at what speed I should be stroking.
The potential benefit I see in these masturbation sessions is that I am learning to familiarize myself with my body and to a degree the natural sensations it takes for my penis to achieve an erection. I'm really learning a lot about the way my body works.
Like for instance, in the past, since I switched from prone masturbation to hand masturbation, I would sometimes ejaculate before my penis had become erect. This happened to me as well once while having sex. But now I am learning to follow the sensations of my body in such a way that (even though it currently takes forever) I can achieve an erection before ejaculation.
In fact, when I finally reach a full on erection I continue to stroke for a while longer before ejaculation in order to practice "lasting longer." I'm trying to do this every few days to see if eventually I get better at it but I don't know if it's a good idea or not.
I often wake up with full or partial erections, but not every morning. I don't know what the normal frequency is for someone 30 years of age.
Unfortunately I haven't had very much physical contact with women. I've only kissed a couple of girls within the last 3 months, one of whom was able to stir something down below the waist. A partial erection at least. I don't know what would have happened if I'd made it to the bedroom.
I've also felt a stirring down below a few times when talking to ex-girlfriends on the phone or online. In one instance it even produced a partial erection.
I'm the same age and started
I'm the same age and started rebooting around the same time as you. I've had no relapses but my results are similar. I can masturbate using touch and little/no fantasy. I start getting an erection after a few minutes and can keep it erect for as long as I want. If I stop stroking though, it goes down in 20-30 seconds. I have tried to have sex a couple of times after rebooting. Was able to get a full erection but it didn't last long and I couldn't get the condom out. That was due to anxiety probably.
I also had experiences ejaculating before being fully erect but that is during sex usually and rarely masturbation. I think that's also due to anxiety.
Do you have anxiety while masturbating? I think if you continue the reboot with no relapses, you'll be able to get to where I am in terms of masturbating. I have no idea when I'll be able to have sex again though...
Have you both
read through the ideas here? I think it's good to get connected to your sexuality, but you actually don't have to go all the way to climax every time. Tips For Former Fappers
Last Saturday I met a girl and she came home with me. There was lots of heavy kissing, and I managed to get her undressed, but aside from a few spontaneous but probably not full-on erections, I wasn't able to have one. The next morning, she offered me a condom to have sex as I was fully erect and went limp immediately upon trying to put it on. I was able to have an orgasm with her through other means, though, but I don't recall if I was 100% erect.
Tuesday, she came home again. I tried to have sex without a condom, as I had a 60-70% erection, but lost it inside of her. I kept forcing it, and eventually ejaculated while totally limp. The next morning we tried a few more times to have sex, but I would lose my erection every time.
Last night, we cuddled in bed at her friend's house, clothes on. I got a few spontaneous erections, some in the morning time, but only a few were about 100% and they would only last for a few minutes.
There was a lot of cuddling and kissing involved in all of the above, and I do feel more alive downstairs than I have in a while, but I'm far from 100% and a little frustrated. Usually when this happens my mind wanders, and I start to thin what if porn is not the problem, but something else entirely. I feel positive about my results with her, because I'm getting more reactions out of my penis than I have in a very long time, but if I look at this thing objectively, this is the first girl I've had ED problems with that I am absolutely unable to have sex with okay even a few times.
The only other positive is I have little to no desire right now to look at porn.
Sounds frustrating
But what else do you think it would be?
What about starting with a gentler, no-performance-pressure approach? Did you see this thread?
it is probably anxiety at this point
a non performance oriented approach helps a lot. If you can kind of explain things to the girl that is always good. That she gets you excited because she is very hot and that you are recovering from too much porn. Takes the pressure off, do you think?
and honestly
it would be better to avoid masturbation and probably orgasm too. The fact that you have trouble getting erections without fantasy or porn when you are masturbating indicates that you have a ways to go still in rebooting. The circuits that are responsible for this are still accustomed to the old ways. Rewiring is still continuing. I would try to have as much non orgasmic sexual and non-sexual activity as possible without performance needs.
If you are using condoms strictly for birth control you can have sex with soft entry without condoms when she is having her period if you and she are okay with that.
I'm not dead, I just haven't
I'm not dead, I just haven't been active on these boards. I would like to say that I was finally able to have sex with this girl successfully two or three times, but always in the back of my mind was this constant anxiety that I would lose it some how. And even though I was able to do it, I still didn't feel 100% like I used to be. I realize I have a long ways to go.
Unfortunately last month and this month has been plagued with little relapses. I can only say PMO free for about 10 days. I don't know why but I'm having a lot of trouble just not peeking at porn, which is weird because I feel like I had stronger willpower when I first began this.
I'm wondering if there is
I'm wondering if there is another angle I can come at this from another way to tackling the problem. I think part of the reason I had so many relapses, is that I've been pretty depressed for the past 6 months. I also have the nagging suspicion that my problem may not be porn related, even though I seem to have all the symptoms. It should also be noted that I am taking propecia which is said to cause ED, but for years of taking the drug I had none of these symptoms. I started taking it in maybe 2005, and I didn't start having major ED problems until 2010 and 2011.
can be soothing to your nervous system if you don't overtax yourself. What happened to "this girl?"
Well I move around a lot
Well I move around a lot because of work. So I had to leave, essentially. No bad break-up or anything.
I've decided to do another full on PMO reboot as opposed to what I've probably been doing in the past 4 or 5 months, which is avoid P, but try to coax healthy M and sometimes O. This led to many relapses. So now I'm going back to giving up the 3 to see if it will make any difference.
I have to say, it's only been 2 weeks or so (I'm trying not to keep count this time around), but I feel much better in that I have no desire to watch P. Sometimes I have brief P fantasy, but it goes away. Also, stumbling on a sexy image online or elsewhere doesn't seem to set off the buzzing trigger effect in my brain that it used to. I think I may have gotten back to the flatline point.
Unfortunately I am not getting many spontaneous erections. In fact, I'm pretty dead from the below the waist. Sometimes in the mornings I will get a partial erection but that is all.
The great part is that I am not craving P at all. Not having that constant crazy horny buzzing in your head makes life that much more easier. I think that for so many years I used M as a means of handling stress and now I find myself dealing with feelings of uneasiness, and trying to find new ways to alleviate them. It's nice to not have to think of M to do that, but at the same time, I'm sure Ming right now would be an incredible and difficult chore that wouldn't get me fully aroused, would take forever, and would probably trigger a relapse.
I am not really going out and socializing as much as I wish I could, but every time I do, I've noticed it's been easier to meet at least one or two girls and have nice pleasant interactions, even on some occasions getting phone numbers. But this may have to do with the fact that I've got a great new wardrobe, which in turn translates to confidence.
I know this post is all over the place, but I just want to close by saying that I like the direction things seem to be headed. I know at some point I will have to start Ming again, even without P or without O, as I've come to realize that you need to train yourself to respond to natural stimulation, and it's every bit as important as training yourself to reject the unnatural. I'm just not sure when I should start testing the waters again with M. I'm far from ready now, but I'm wondering what cues to look for.
Not sure if this FAQ will help
Been having some crazy mood swings lately. Veer from happiness and confidence to depression and anxiety. Not sure if this is P related. I know the first time I tried to give up P (and was off PMO for a pretty long time) I saw some positive effects emotionally. Since then I'm not seeing these benefits so much. Sometimes I feel inexplicably happy, while other times I'm back in the emotional gutter. I only hope that with time, my freedom from porn addiction will make me happier, confident, and more social.
I'd like to add, so that this
I'd like to add, so that this isn't such a downer post, the one bit of progress that's different than any other time I have tried to reboot. I don't crave porn at all, which is strange to me. Even in my early reboot attempts, I found myself doing certain activities that may have mimicked the way I used to look up porn. I remember going onto movie sites and trying to find movies with nudity in them. At certain points in my recovery it was too much temptation to even look at sexy images of women online. It set off this crazy dopamine buzz in my head that I suspect was related to the way my brain processed porn.
I'm not getting that very much these days. In fact, if I stumble onto a picture of a woman online, sometimes it may even be an intentionally erotic photo with nudity, I don't seem to get that crazy buzzing in the brain anymore. I don't have much of a reaction. I recognize its beauty and move on. I don't dwell on it, I don't crave more. And I certainly don't find myself searching for it. Hopefully this is a good sign, and not misinterpreting the effects of the flatline period I seem to have returned to. Hopefully it's progress and not something temporary.
The most positive thing I could say is that I tried to get cleaned up about a year ago, and when I think about the amount of porn I was watching in a year's time before my clean-up, and the amount of porn I've consumed since, the difference is staggering. I went from masturbating to porn 3 to 4 times a day, everyday, to now -- where I go weeks and months without even looking at porn, and without really thinking about it or craving it like I used to. My habits have changed drastically an that's got to count for something.
Painful Erections
Perhaps this should be its own post, but I'll post it here and let the moderators decide.
I started trying to cure myself of this addiction a little over a year ago because I was having copulatory ED. Since then, I have had successes and failures, relapses and such, but I am currently about 59 days into my recent stretch of no PMO, and I feel better than ever.
I've been waking up from time to time with partial erections, and even get a few semis out in public while riding the subway and things like that (though these are less common). What has happened to me a few times, is that I'll wake up with a full on erection that is actually a little bit painful. I hadn't heard of anything like this before in anyone else's experiences. Is this common? Is my body not so used to full on erections that the ones I'm getting are hurting a little? Will this go away? Could I have damaged my penis from years of unhealthy prone masturbation?
These days my best erections though seem to be the ones that hurt a little bit. They are the only ones I'm getting where I feel the penis is fully erect enough for sex.
is my supposed poor performance be porn induced or simply anxie
I am 25 years and have been watching still images and slower videos for almost three years(but not very often). For about three months now i have been connected to an ultra high speed internet source. During this period, i occasionally watch very fast streaming hardcore videos. My performance has let me down in the last two sexual encounters (three weeks apart, two different girls). most of the time(especially when am alone) i get hard just as normal times, but when a girl comes around i freak out. I masturbate at least once or twice a week till i orgasm( this has been normal ever since late high school). Is my supposed poor performance porn induced or simply anxiety? Secondly does softcore porn(still porn photos) affect the rebooting period?


text:
SA15 - 8-Channel Binary I/O Adapter
The SA15 is a binary I/O interface adapter with five binary inputs, five binary outputs and three binary bidirectional inputs/outputs.
Technical Data
Interface Type
Binary I/O
- 5 outputs
- 5 inputs
- 3 bidirectional inputs/outputs
Peripheral Connections
Via front panel on a shielded 15-pin HD-Sub receptacle connector
- As a piggy-back board directly on a CPU board
- Via ribbon cable
Electrical Specifications
- Isolation voltage: 500V AC
- Supply voltage/power consumption: +5 V (4.85 V..5.25 V), tbd.
- MTBF: 733 000 h @ 50°C (derived from MIL-HDBK-217F)
Mechanical Specifications
- Dimensions: 32 mm x 42 mm
- Weight: tbd.
Environmental Specifications
- Temperature range (operation):
- Industrial temperature range on request
- Airflow: min. 10 m³/h
- Temperature range (storage): -40..+85°C
- Relative humidity (operation): max. 95% non-condensing
- Relative humidity (storage): max. 95% non-condensing
- Altitude: -300 m to + 3 000 m
- Shock: 15 g/11 ms
- Bump: 10 g/16 ms
- Vibration (sinusoidal): 2 g/10..150 Hz
PCB manufactured with a flammability rating of 94V-0 by UL recognized manufacturers
Tested according to EN 55022 (radio disturbance), IEC 61000-4-2 (ESD) and IEC 61000-4-4 (burst)
Operating Temperature
- Depends on system configuration
- Maximum: +85°C
- Minimum: -50°C
Some of these options may only be available for large volumes.
Please ask our sales staff for more information.
Ordering Information
Standard SA15 Models
8 digital I/O channels, -40..+85°C qualified, no RoHS
8 digital I/O channels, -50..+85°C with qualified components, conformal coating, no RoHSThis product can be ordered until 2021-03-30
Data Sheets
User Manuals
Product Comparison


text:
A forum about Atari 16/32 computers and their clones. This forum is in no way affiliated with Atari Interactive.
Moderators: Mug UK, Moderator Team
Dal wrote:Wiki has now been unlocked. Let me know if you need anything else...
wongck wrote:Dal wrote:Wiki has now been unlocked. Let me know if you need anything else...
Yeah, how about changing the subject title....
Mug UK wrote:Subject header changed
Ragstaff wrote:It would be good to get all the pictures back though. Not sure how we'd go about that aside from the bruteforce, "check-every-article" method!
Ragstaff wrote:When I used to revert and ban spammers I was checking the wiki quite regularly and there wasn't much activity then (through 2009), so hopefully there have not been too many new articles or edits of value... because it will be a real pain to find them and merge them.
Dal wrote:Silver Surfer managed to get the wiki back from 250host and it has been uploaded to the backend. In the meantime a lot of work has been done to bring the current wiki up to scratch. I'm not too well ATM but once I'm back to normal, I'll set up the one SS uploaded as read only so that we can pull the articles of interest out and commit them to the current wiki.
Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 5 guests


text:
NOTE: Ebooks purchased from the Hachette website will not work on a Kindle eink device or within Apple's ibook reader. To read ebooks purchased via Hachette you'll need a free Adobe ebooks account. If you don't have one, please visit Adobe Digital Editions software. Registering with Adobe will allow you to sideload this ebook onto a number of devices and platforms, including: BN Nook, Kobo, Google Play, SonyReader, BAM Reader, or the Bluefire app, which runs on Android powered devices including the Kindle Fire, iPhone, and iPad. If you wish to read this ebook on your desktop, you can use the Adobe Digital Editions application.
Questions? Please see our Shopping FAQs


text:
Boys Grade 3/4 Advanced League
If your son wants to try a higher level of competition we are again offering the "House Boys Grades 3-4 Advanced League" this fall/winter season. This House league will allow the boys in these grades only, who have potential to play at a higher level of competition, begin the path toward Select play.
The tryouts for this league will be held before the regular house evaluations. We prefer that your son attend all tryouts for best exposure, but only one tryout is required for placement.
If your son wants to try out for this league, please register him as a HOUSE player, but add a comment to his registration that he is interested in trying out for the Advanced league. Once registration for the 2019/20 season has opened, go through our current website, type http://www.burkebasketball.org directly on your web browser line. The on time registration date is usually in mid october; after this date, your player will be placed on the Waiting List, with no guarantee of placement on any House team.
In the past, the Advanced League was composed of 6 teams of 8 players each, to be formed based on the tryouts and a subsequent draft. Players will be notified whether they are selected for this league by the coaching staffs of their respective teams or the League Director.
Since 4th graders are the youngest age group for which we hold House Skills Evaluations and a league draft, if your player is not selected for the Advanced League, and he is in 4th grade, he must attend the House Skills Evaluation to be placed appropriately on a regular House grade 4 team. For 3rd graders who are not selected for an Advanced team, they will automatically be placed on a team in the House grade 3 league based on their school and/or possible player requests included in their player registration.
Practices for this Advanced League will begin in mid November and run through February. Practices for the regular House league will begin mid-Nov. (based on the County's winter allocations of public school gyms). Practices will be held once per week, for one hour, but the Advanced League teams will have the whole gym, whereas the regular House teams share the gym with another team.
We will have open gyms prior to tryouts. Dates for all events are below.
Open gym 1 on Wednesday Oct 2nd from 6:30-7:30 at Bonnie Brae
Open gym 2 on Monday Oct 7th from 6:30-7:30 at Cherry Run
Tryout 1 Monday Oct 14 630-800 at Halley
Tryout 2 Tuesday Oct 15 630-800 at Oakview
Tryout 3 Thursday Oct 17 630-800 at Irving 1 & 2
New Privacy Policy


text:
Geneva – Most people with drug use disorders do not receive effective treatment and care, according to a new WHO information system that, for the first time, provides details on the resources allocated to the prevention and treatment of alcohol and drug-related problems in 147 countries. Until now, drug dependence has not been recognized as a health problem in many countries and stigma and discrimination associated with drug dependence have been major barriers to appropriate treatment.
Lack of access to treatment
"Drug dependence is a disorder that can be treated effectively but, unfortunately, the large majority of persons who need it do not have access to treatment," says Dr Shekhar Saxena, Director of the Department for Mental Health and Substance Abuse. "The data presented in the new system illustrate the huge gaps that still exist in the area of drug dependence treatment. But more and more countries realize the benefits of treatment for drug and alcohol dependence, not only for the individuals themselves, but also for the society and the economy."
According to new UN estimates, worldwide about 230 million adults (aged 15-64), or 5% of the adult population, used an illicit drug at least once in 2010, including about 27 million people with severe drug problems.
Data on funding, staff and services
The WHO Global Health Observatory Database – Resources for the Prevention and Treatment of Substance Use Disorders now provides such data for each country as funding, staff and services and thereby complements the already available information on scope and associated harms of substance use disorders. The country profiles included in the new system cover 88% of the world's population.
"The availability of drug dependence treatment lags well behind treatment and care offered for other diseases according to our data," explains Dr Vladimir Poznyak, Coordinator of the Management of Substance Use team at WHO. "For example, only 45% of the assessed countries are able to provide essential medicines to treat the dependence on heroin and other opiates and in almost half of the countries where treatment is available not more than one in 5 persons with drug use disorders benefits from the services. A quarter of the countries which identify opiates as the main drug problem do not offer the range of medications recommended by WHO."
Low-cost treatment
Drug dependence is a disorder that can be treated effectively with low-cost medicines and standardized psychological therapies. In particular, the treatment of heroin dependence has been very successful in reducing HIV infection due to unsafe injection, crime and the risk of death through overdose.
WHO has been working closely with the UN Office on Drugs and Crime (UNODC) since 2009 to increase the access to treatment for people with drug use disorders. The understanding that drug abuse, at its core, is a public health issue has increased in recent years. However, only 82 countries offer special health services to people with drug use disorders.
With the launch of the new global information system WHO commemorates the International Day against Drug Abuse and Illicit Trafficking celebrated by the UN every year on 26 June.
For more information please contact:
Mr. Glenn Thomas
Communications Officer
WHO, Geneva
Telephone: +41 22 791 3983
Mobile: +41 79 509 0667
Email: [email protected]
Dr. Vladimir Poznyak
Coordinator, Management of Substance Abuse
WHO, Geneva
Telephone: +41 22 791 4307
Mobile: +41 79 367 6213
Email: [email protected]


text:
Review: 10 top iPad apps for kids this year
- Apps include 'Elmo Loves 123s," 'Bugs and Numbers'
Apps for kids continue to innovate, and they can now be found on most mobile devices from iPads to Android tablets to smartphones and even Kindle Fire and Nook. As this year comes to an end, here is a list of sure-fire app pleasers. While most are for the iPad, some of the apps are available across all platforms.
Snappyant, best for ages 2-4, $3.99, iPad
Filled with charming and hilarious illustrations showing why baby animals think their moms are the best, this book app is perfect for your youngest techie. The baby bear mentions his mom's hugs, so he is seen enveloped in a bear hug where he is squeezed tightly. The hippo mommy excels at hula-hooping, where the mommy frog is a dancer. The pattern of hearing why the mom is the best, followed by a surprising animation, will make your toddler or preschooler giggle.
Sesame Street, best for age 3-5, $4.99,iPad
Elmo teams up with Abby to teach kids about the numbers 1 to 20. Through fun videos and songs from the Sesame Street television show, as well as games and coloring pages, kids learn to identify numbers, trace them, count groups of objects and practice early adding and subtraction. The app also provides parents with information about their child's experience. Elmo and Abby are so likeable that kids have a riot learning numbers while playing with their favorite muppets.
Nosy Crow, best for ages 3-6, $4.99, iPhone, iPod Touch, iPad
Kids meet Parker Penguin when he is just a chick growing up in Antarctica. On each page in the science book app, kids interact with the penguin to learn what his life is like. They help him grow up, hunt for food while avoiding predators, find a mate and protect his egg. When the egg is ready to hatch, kids tap the shell so the new baby chick can break out and the story starts again — with a new star — Parker's son. Presented with rich artwork full of round shapes and accompanied by music that varies when you touch the penguin, this is an intriguing way for kids to learn science.
Duncan Studio, for ages 4-7, $3.99, iPad
This interactive book brings together two things that kids love: narration by Jim Dale (the award-winning narrator of the Harry Potter audio books) and mythical creatures (such as the Loch Ness monster and the Abominable Snowman). Starring a timid little boy who gets up on the wrong side of the bed, this youngster's day is filled with surprising but wonderful interactions with monsters and beasts. He plays hide-and-seek with the Boogey Monster in his closet, flies to school on the back of a Griffin, tickles an Ogre under its arms, tosses rings onto a Unicorn's horn and struts home, surrounded by a crew of dancing zombies. With great interaction, an engaging story that introduces a different beast for each letter of the alphabet and wonderful illustrations, this app will chase away all fears of monsters.
Little Bit Studio, LLC., best for ages 4-8, $2.99, iPhone, iPod Touch, iPad
By playing through 18 games, kids learn early math concepts, including numbers, how to count, comparing sizes and sequence. They even explore early fractions and telling time. The games feature realistic-looking bugs doing things like hiding under discarded items in the junkyard while waiting to be counted, or crawling through an arcade game where kids learn left and right by following onscreen arrows and listening to spoken directions. These educational games are fun, and they adjust in difficulty depending on how your child is doing.
Lazoo Worldwide, Inc., best for ages 4-10, Free, iPad
This free app contains a simple drawing program and a series of 18 pages with drawing prompts. When kids respond to the prompt by drawing something and then hit the "Go" button on the page, their creation magically animates. It is as if the ink is enchanted and what they draw can come alive. In addition to drawing, kids can also watch an animated video about three friends, using their creativity to go on an adventure. This app is special and free; so don't miss it.
Faces iMake - Right Brain Creativity
iMagine machine LLC, best for ages 4-up, $1.99 on iPad (also on iPhone and iPod Touch for $1.99 but called Faces iMake - Premium)
This is one of the most creative apps in iTunes because it encourages kids to create faces using unusual collage materials. By thinking outside of the box, kids arrange candy, toys, fruit, musical instruments and more to create fanciful faces. With the iPad version, kids can even upload their creations to FaceWorld, a virtual art gallery. They can also download other people's creations, modify them and then upload them to collaborate with kids from around the world.
Filmundus AB, best for ages 7-up, $1.99, iPhone, iPod Touch, iPad
Pettson the inventor and his talking cat Findus have 37 inventions for you to recreate. Pettson provides you with the parts to his Rube Goldberg-like machines, and it is up to you to drag and drop them into the correct locations. Each invention has an "On" switch so you can experiment to see what happens when you do things. The wacky inventions do things like rocking an old lady to sleep in her chair. Engineering becomes fun with this zany, hands-on building kit.
Disney, best for ages 8-up, $.99 on iPhone, iPod Touch, iPad, Android, Kindle Fire, and $1.99 on Nook.
This physics puzzler stars a secret agent platypus named Perry. Perry earned his fame on the Disney television show "Phineas and Ferb," but you don't have to know the show to enjoy this inventive set of puzzles. In each, you must figure out how to use your finger to create a path for water to get it to some generators so that you can transport Perry to his spy headquarters. In each puzzle, the evil Dr. Doofenshmirtz has placed obstacles in your way, such as lasers that heat the water and turn it into steam. With over 100 puzzles, a semi-aquatic sleuth with an attitude and a hilarious bad guy, there's a lot to love.
Rovio Entertainment Ltd, best for 8-up, $.99 for iPhone, iPod Touch, iPad, Android. HD version is $.99 for iPad, Nook and $2.99 for Kindle.
In a clever mashup, the famous Angry Birds have now morphed into the good guys from Star Wars, and the bad pigs are now Darth Vader and the evil pigtroopers. This version of Angry Birds is still filled with puzzle levels where you slingshot the birds at the pigs who are hiding inside of block structures. Everyone is in costume and the Star Wars music and locations grace the background. The beloved Star Wars themes, with accompanying power of lightsabers, blasters and Jedi powers, breathe new life into this popular app franchise. Losing becomes fun, because a piggie version of Darth Vader laughs at you.
Jinny Gudmundsen is the author of the upcoming For Dummies book iPad Apps for Kids. Contact her at firstname.lastname@example.com.


text:
California's best-known commentators -- including Dan Walters and George Skelton -- are now thundering about the supposed abuse of Proposition 25, the initiative that restored a majority vote to pass a state budget, by Gov. Jerry Brown and the Democrats.
The criticism around Prop 25 stems in large part by a Democratic manuever to move Brown's temporary tax initiative to the top of the ballot via a so-called "trailer bill" tied to the budget.
But there's some trouble with the commentators' accounts of the trouble with Prop 25. They misunderstand what was wrong with the initiative -- in a way that will make reform harder.
U.S. & World
Specifically, commentators are chafing at how the legislature and governor used the greater discretion provided by Prop 25. And they are suggesting limits be put on that discretion.
That's wrong.
The legislature and governor, hamstrung by all kinds of constitutional rules, initiatives and court decisions, do need more discretion. But they also need electoral accountability, which they don't have.
Such accountability wasn't in Prop 25 -- which is why the real problem with Prop 25 wasn't actually Prop 25 at all.
The policy of having a majority vote for the budget is a good one.
The problem was that Prop 25, like all ballot initiatives, was disembodied and unconnected to any grander vision of reform.
In California's complicated system, changing just one thing -- even if the change is a good one -- is going to create all kinds of unexpected problems.
In this case, Brown and the Democrats used the majority-vote budget power to make a major, problematic change in the initiative process -- giving an advantage in ballot listing to constitutional amendments, even though California's too-long constitution doesn't need more amendments.
You can bet that, in the future, this power will be used for other things that work against reform.
It's a reminder that one-initiative-at-a-time reform -- the style favored by all right-thinking people and good government groups in California -- is very high-risk. The lower-risk option is full constitutional redesign, via a commission or constitutional convention.
Indeed, there was one thoughtful, handsome commentator who made this very point -- and saw that Prop 25 would create trouble -- before it was passed.
On Oct. 29, 2010, the week before the vote on Prop 25, this commentator wrote in a piece called "The Trouble With Prop 25"
California governing system is so broken that it's possible to vote for an initiative that advances a good policy and still make things worse. Prop 25 is such an initiative. Context matters, and Prop 25 is, unfortunately, out of context. And thus it's unlikely to make the budget process any better. In fact, it's a safe bet that Prop 25, if enacted, would make the budget process more dysfunctional – and make reforming it more difficult.
That same dashing commentator also explained that a majority-vote budget didn't make sense without reforms that would make the Democratic majority more accountable -- by giving minority Republicans a better chance of winning back the legislature if budgeting went badly. He explained then:
In short, putting the majority in charge of the budget (and all fiscal matters) is a good idea. But the idea won't work until California adopts an election system that permits voters to hold the legislative majority accountable. We don't have such a system now. Our legislative elections
are fixed. No matter who draws the lines, our election system guarantees that Democrats will be in the majority.
That's why getting rid of supermajorities must be paired with major election reform that makes every vote count and gives voters the power to kick out the majority party when it doesn't perform. The best way to do that is by creating a larger legislature elected in multi-member districts through elections that rely at least in part on proportional representation. Under such a system, all voters would be able to vote directly for the party they want in the legislature.
That brilliant commentator was, of course, your blogger. Bookmark here if you want to know the future.
Read more here by clicking on Dan Walters' recent column in the Sacramento Bee.
Lead Prop Zero blogger Joe Mathews is California editor at Zocalo Public Square, a fellow at Arizona State University's Center for Social Cohesion, and co-author of California Crackup: How Reform Broke the Golden State and How We Can Fix It (University of California, 2010).
Send us your thoughts via Twitter @PropZero or add your comment to our Facebook page.


text:
Mouser Cabinetry, LLC has earned the environmental stewardship certification by the Kitchen Cabinet Manufacturers Association. As an ongoing commitment on behalf of the cabinet manufacturer, this nationally recognized program was established to encourage the responsible management of environmental and community resources.
Stewardship certification requires the annual review of manufacturing facilities in order to earn qualifying points in five categories. These five categories include: Air Quality, Product Resource Management, Process Resource Management, Environmental Stewardship, and Community Relations.
Qualifying points are earned by utilizing environmentally responsible materials and coatings. Manufacturers are required to go to the suppliers of wood and recycled wood fibers to ensure accountability to industry standards, to the consumer, and to the environment. Points are also earned by incorporating superior standards of resource conservation and waste management; complying with government regulations and contributing to the local community.
Standards set forth by the KCMA Stewardship Program require the appropriate documentation on manufacturing practices, as well as company policies and practices that relate to the manufacturers dedication of environmental stewardship practices.
For more information please review the KCMA Program by clicking on the KCMA logo or by contacting Mouser Cabinetry at 800.345.7537 ext. 298.
© 2020 - Mouser Cabinetry


text:
Since I know Brian likes to take a break from his demanding gig as DC's 37th most popular bike blogger [Ed. Note: I don't. This is my only outlet for creativity. Now I'm gonna have to go paint a bowl of fruit or something], I thought I contribute some experiences and musings from my recent trip to the great Northwest. My wife and I just got married a couple of weeks ago, and our honeymoon was an Alaska cruise that began in Vancouver. Having heard that Vancouver is a wonderful place to be, my wife and I planned to get there a day early and explore. Even though my wife isn't really into cycling, she sees its value/fun for sightseeing and knows she can indulge me at the same time, so she kills two birds with one stone.
The honeymoon actually included three bike trips, two in Vancouver at each end of our trip, and one in Juneau, Alaska. I think Vancouver can teach us some valuable lessons about cycling infrastructure, so I figured I'd share my experiences there first.
First off...if you have any desire to leave DC, but do not have the means, do NOT visit Vancouver because you will forever be sad that you cannot move there yesterday. It is amazing. I won't get into it here, but it's probably the one truly northern place I could see myself moving to. Given that it's a relatively hip town and basically an extension of the San Fran/Portland/Seattle cultural corridor, it's pretty progressive in its transportation policies. Lots of mixed use high rises, good public transportation, noticeable lack of freeways (there's only one, and it just barely runs in the city limits), and of course, bike infrastructure. I was very impressed with Vancouver's bike infrastructure, not just because of its scale, but a lot of the minor details are well thought out and the system isn't just an afterthought.
Although Vancouver doesn't have bikeshare (coming soon, maybe...mandatory helmet laws may be problematic though) it does have a ton of bike rental shops, so it's very easy to find a bike and go. My wife and I stayed on the north side of downtown, which is right on Vancouver Harbor. The downtown area is basically a peninsula, with a huge urban park (Stanley Park) at the tip. This park is encircled by an MUP, which has separate paths for cyclists and peds. The path is also supposed to be one way, so at no time do you have bikes or runners coming at you.
|I married up, obviously
|These should be posted on roads with sharrows, I think
|Working up an appetite
|Separate tracks for cyclists and peds
|Bikes, ocean, mountains...that says it all
Within the city, there's a wide range of infrastructure, from bike lanes, to cycletracks, to green lanes, and they all get lots of use.
|Morning rush hour downtown
|There are a number of green lanes, but they seem to appear at random
|No place is immune, I guess...
|How do his arms not fall asleep when he rides?
|Although this cycletrack was relatively short, I liked the way they made it separated by the planters
|Vancouver has a nice grid pattern, making for looong bike lanes
|This bridge has separated bike lanes in both directions, as well as a sidewalk
|Removing two traffic lanes doesn't seem to have caused congestion here
Although Vancouver has some actual green lanes (see photos above), the green paint seems to be reserved mostly for when the major bike lanes cross intersections. I think this is a great way to help minimize right hooks, as it gives drivers a visual cue that takes up more of their line of sight.
I think Vancouver also has some great lessons on development...build it, and people will come. They have a shitload of shoreline, and what's not parkland has been developed with paths, gardens, marinas, public markets, and the like. Seriously, I saw very little of the shoreline that did not encourage people to use the space. I think we're getting there with the SW and SE waterfronts, but it's an investment well worth making
|This is a typical scene from just about anywhere along the downtown shoreline.
Highlighting the development issue, one of the coolest places in Vancouver is Granville Island. It's a small island with a bridge running over it, but instead of letting it become the typical underpass, it was turned into a public market/family area/artists enclave/high end shopping district. You can't see it that well in this photo, but it's the area in the center of the photo.
|Covered bike parking at Granville Island public market.
In Vancouver, we boarded our ship and headed off for Alaska. Instead of paying the cruise ship an exorbitant amount of money for shore excursions, we arranged our own. We noticed the ship offered a bike ride up to Mendenhall Glacier in Juneau, and we found out that we could easily rent bikes and ride up their on our own, since the glacier is right outside town. For the ship excursion, I think it was like $125 a person, and a shuttle took you within about 3 miles of the glacier and they let you ride from there. We rented bikes for like $40 a person for the whole afternoon and rode 25 miles round trip from Juneau to Mendenhall glacier, squeezing in a stop at a local brewery for free samples. So yeah, I think our self-made excursion probably was better.
On the ship, our assigned dinner seats were with another early 30s couple who were pretty into biking and outdoors stuff, who had not made any plans for Juneau. We invited to come along on the bike ride and they were more than happy to join. The folks at Cycle Alaska were super accommodating and were able to find bikes for our new friends on short notice. If you ever find yourself in Juneau, stop by and say hi. They even told us we could lock the bikes up outside the shop if we weren't back by closing time, at no extra charge. Freaking awesome folks.
I was a little wary of the route from Juneau to Mendenhall, since I didn't picture Alaska as a cyclists paradise. However, it turns out that the route is all bike laned or MUPd. Even in the spots where we rode in the road, like making left turns or whatever, the drivers were very patient and no one honked or revved their engine or anything. There may have been some slightly drunk cycling going on after the brewery stop that may have resulted in some dumb cycling, but even then, the Alaska drivers were super nice. We also saw way more cyclists than I anticipated...all kinds of folks ranging from roadies to locals running errands. I think cycling, in addition to appealing to the urban, progressive types, also is the arena of the rugged individualist types you find in places like Alaska...or maybe I'm just full of shit, I don't know. But I think we'd be wise to remember that there are cyclists on both sides of the aisle, even if it doesn't always seem that way.
|Bike lane and sidewalk!
|Bike to a glacier...that's Alaska for you
|Lots of MUP action
|Biking with 30 pounds of camera gear is uh, not easy


text:
Tell us how we can help
you more!
If you have suggestions on how we can improve India Herbs - Inspirational
Video Series, please feel free to email us at [email protected].com.
|110% Guaranteed BBB A+ Rated
AyurH addresses hemorrhoid concerns by promoting healthy
inflammation and healing responses along with digestion support.
Herbal Extracts Formulation
60 500mg Capsules per Box
(Dosage 2 Capsules per Day)
|Common Name
|Raw Herb Equivalent
per 500mg Capsule
|Primary Benefits
|Indian Laburnum
|Promotes healthy inflammation response
|Promotes healthy inflammation response
|Promotes healthy healing response
|Bolsters integrity of intestinal mucous lining
|Promotes healthy healing response
|Chebulic Myrobalan
|Supports healthy digestion
|Maintains mucous membrane function
|Cutch Tree
|Maintains mucous membrane health
|Gotu Kola
|Promotes healthy healing response
|Long Pepper
|Supports healthy nutrition absorption
|Fosters gastrointestinal tract detoxification
|Indian Madder
|Fosters gastrointestinal tract detoxification
|Sugar Cane
|Supports healthy digestion
AyurH's proprietary formulation contains 277 natural phytonutrients that exert 500 synergistic activities on your body. Many of these phytonutrients are widely recognized for their contribution to Hemorrhoid Healing.
For example:
India Herbs Therapeutic Products


text:
Property Details
Fairview VW
#703 2988 ALDER STREET, Shaughnessy Gate, Vancouver West, BC, V6H 4C3, Canada
Well-appointed lateral living apartment with spectacular views across Vancouver. The property offers a smart floor plan with large entrance hall, fully fitted kitchen with space for a breakfast table. Ample open dining and living room with feature fireplace and a view from every seat. 2 large bedrooms with room for a king sized bed, and separated form each other. House sized storage and a solarium to enjoy your views. The property would benefit form some remodeling but is easily ready to move into as is. 2 parking and a storage locker complete this package! Shaughnessy Gate is quietly set within its own private grounds which include two tennis courts and is conveniently located for both VGH and Downtown Vancouver. Get inside and bring your measuring tape today!
Views from Every Room
Juliette Balcony
2 parking stalls
External Storage Locker
House sized in suite storage
Elevator, In Suite Laundry, Storage, Tennis Court, Grand Lobby
Listing Provided By
Prompton Real Estate Serv.Inc.
Copyright and Disclaimer
The data relating to real estate on this web site comes in part from the MLS Reciprocity program of the Real Estate Board of Greater Vancouver. Real estate listings held by participating real estate firms are marked with the MLSR logo and detailed information about the listing includes the name of the listing agent. This representation is based in whole or part on data generated by the Real Estate Board of Greater Vancouver which assumes no responsibility for its accuracy. The materials contained on this page may not be reproduced without the express written consent of the Real Estate Board of Greater Vancouver. Copyright 2019 by the Real Estate Board of Greater Vancouver, Fraser Valley Real Estate Board, Chilliwack and District Real Estate Board, BC Northern Real Estate Board, and Kootenay Real Estate Board. All Rights Reserved.
- Claire LeLacheur
- 604-649-9253
- 604.255.1510
- email@example.com
- 1428 West 7th Ave
- Vancouver, BC


text:
Any notion that the departure of the U.N. chemical weapons inspection team from Syria on Saturday opens a window for a U.S. attack is "grotesque," the top U.N. spokesman said.
U.N. spokesman Martin Nesirky spoke at a news conference shortly after Secretary-General Ban Ki-Moon had met in New York with U.N. disarmament chief Angela Kane who had just returned from Damascus after days of tense negotiations with Syrian officials over a U.N. probe into an apparent poison gas attack on Aug. 21 in the Damascus suburb of Ghouta, a rebel stronghold.
A U.S. intelligence assessment says the attack was carried out by Syrian President Bashar Assad's government and killed 1,429 civilians, including more than 400 children.
Ban spoke to the head of the U.N. chemical weapons inspection team, Ake Sellstrom, on Saturday to thank him, and will be briefed further by Sellstrom on Sunday, Nesirky said.
The U.N. chemical weapons inspection team is now in The Hague, Netherlands, Nesirky said. The samples they collected in Syria are expected to be repackaged and sent to laboratories around Europe to check them for traces of poison gas, Nesirky said.
The spokesman said the evidence would have to be analyzed in the laboratories before any report is made to member states. There is no specific time line for how soon the analysis will be completed, Nesirky said.
The inspectors left Syria and flew out of Lebanon early Saturday. The team carried out a fourth and final day of inspections on Friday as they sought to determine precisely what happened in the alleged chemical weapons attack.
Nesirky said the departure of the U.N. inspection team should not be seen as any kind of a green light for military action.
"I've seen all kinds of reporting suggesting that the departure of the chemical weapons team somehow opens a window for military action of some kind," Nesirky said. "Frankly, that is grotesque, and it's an affront to the more than 1,000 staff, U.N. staff, who are on the ground in Syria delivering humanitarian aid and who will continue to deliver critical aid."
He also said any attack would leave the Syrian population vulnerable to harm.
Nesirky was pressed repeatedly on whether the inspectors would try to assign blame for the attack, and responded that the team's mandate is limited to determining whether chemical weapons were used, as agreed between Damascus and the United Nations.
In recent days, another U.N. spokesman, Farhan Haq, has said the team would build an `evidence-based narrative" of the alleged attack that seemed to hint that they might look at how the event began.
The United States, however, has said it has gathered intelligence showing that the apparent gas attack was ordered by Assad's government, not the rebels, making the outcome of the U.N. inquiry moot if the United States launches an attack to punish Syria in the coming days.


text:
On Monday, I reported of another meeting of local residents angry with the newly completed Prospect Park West bike lane.
This lead to the creation of a facebook group against the bike lane which you can check out here. (Although you have to join it to find out what its all about, which means its made up of a lot of pro-bike lane people who want to be part of the debate-maybe a flaw with facebook)
Seems like this group wants to argue that the bike lane is bad because it has removed a lane of traffic and then when trucks double park, things like this happen…
That's kind of like the woman trying to sue McDonald's for burning her mouth because the coffee was too hot. Hmmmmm…Common Sense vs finding someone to blame?
Then there was an article in Streetsblog about the lane, by Ben Fried-
As PPW Intrigue Mounts, Brooklyn Paper Defends the Completed Street
Before I get to the "intrigue" part of this post (it's juicy), first let me say that if you haven't checked out the Prospect Park West re-design yet, you owe it to yourself to head on over and take a look. Last time I checked, some of the finishing touches have yet to appear, but it's already one of the most effective street transformations the city has undertaken.
With two lanes of traffic instead of three, PPW feels like it's been reclaimed for the neighborhood. I haven't biked the new two-way path since it opened, but I've walked on each side of the new PPW, and it's a pleasure. The highway speeds and zooming traffic noise are gone, and the calming effect seems to rub off on everybody.
Read more here.
Ben pointed out last weeks op-ed in the Park Slope Courier against the new lane… Here.
and then the Brooklyn Paper's response in defense of the new lane… here.
Gothamist and the Daily news had articles too.
This lead to a pro-bike lane facebook group which can be found here.
This group has some valuable information such as if you'd like to write the people who support the new lane and helped put it in place you can email them:
Community Board 6: email@example.com
Council Member Steve Levin: email@example.com
Council Member Brad Lander: http://bradlander.org/contact
Results of my impromptu poll shows: 143 people voted, 11 said have the lane removed at once, 3 wondered why it couldn't be a regular bike lane, 5 said they were ok with the lane but cyclist need to be more careful and 124 people loved the lane.


text:
Hailo £Free
Yes, we've seen cab ordering apps before, but Hailo looks like it might have a shot at the title here with its easy to use maps, countdown until the taxi arrives, cash and card payment options – and thousands of London Black Cabs already signed up.
Get it
Angry Cowboy £Free
You're an alcoholic cowboy who has to shoot down any drinks in the bar in case he gets back on the wagon, so to speak. Aim carefully so you don't massacre the food though, especially when you progress onto bombs – you still need to eat.
Get it
Garmin Fit 69p
If your Android phone is ANT+ enabled, you can use this tracking app as a hub for your speed, distance, route and calories stats from all your Garmin heart monitors and speed sensors. There's also automatic uploading to Garmin Connect.
Shadowgun £3.49
Gorgeous graphics will keep you coming back for more intergalactic bounty hunting action from the year 2350. With your Android assistant S.A.R.A by your side, there are also hacking mini-games to break up the boss battles.
This pretender to Twitter's micro-blogging crown wants you to follow topics, like photography or Apple, rather than people. The idea is that it makes it easier to avoid content you're not interested in. We're looking at you, all British reality TV.
You may also like
Asus Transformer Prime launching on November 9?
LG to make all-glass Optimus with LED edges


text:
December, 2009
There were 15 applications that were reviewed and scored by deans of other schools of public health. All of the applications had interesting and novel ideas.
The Back of the Envelope Awards are envisioned as a mechanism to stimulate and support intellectual creativity at the School of Public Health that can lead to the next generation of intellectual excellence and productivity. These awards will allow a faculty member the time to more fully explore and develop a hunch, a notion, or an "Ah-ha". Time well spent could lead to a new line of inquiry, new collaborations, a dead end, or a Black Swan, outcomes that are at once unpredictable and therefore worthy of support.
Dr. Olivia Thomas. Computer Image Analysis of Body Type. This research will produce a computer image analysis software program that could replace the BMI measure in obesity research, thereby enabling investigators to more accurately estimate adiposity in persons of all shapes, sizes, ages, and ethnicity.
For the full article, please visit:


text:
Simple to Debunk: Common Beliefs That Are Surprisingly Simple
Entry by burritomouth
Entry by DvorakHarvey
Leave a Reply Cancel reply
Humor: Top 10 Facebook Jokes
Facebook isn't only a long range interpersonal communication site any longer. It has turned into a social wonder. In any critical ways, our lives are reliant on or fragmented without Facebook. Envision being not able to offer your birthday photos with your companions over the world. Or on the other hand not having the capacity to know the most recent that is occurring in the local area.
The virtual universe of Facebook with notices, photographs, posts and jabs has more genuine to us than our whole lives That is the reason, similar to some other consuming social wonder; there are a few jokes on Facebook also. We have assembled a gathering of the most ingenious jokes about Facebook here.
Facebook Joke 1:
Facebook is like a jail. You have mugshot profile picture.
You spend all your time writing on walls. And some totally undesirable people poke you around unnecessarily.
Facebook Joke 2:
A grandmother left her farm, barn, horses, chickens, pigs and $1million cash to her granddaughter. The granddaughter was overwhelmed and said "Granny, I never knew you had so many assets.
Where are they?" The grandmother's last word on her death-bed was 'Facebook'.
Facebook Joke 3:
Teacher asks student, "What do you call a place where people talk to themselves, write on walls, cook imaginary food in fictional cafes, grow crops that do not exist and count make-believe money?"
Student answers, 'Mental hospital.'
Teacher growls, ' No you idiot. Facebook.'
Facebook Joke 4:
If Facebook is a fridge then we keep opening it every few seconds to see if there is anything interesting in it!
Facebook Joke 5:
When do you officially become a Facebook stalker?
When you notice that someone's Facebook profile picture changes and you are not even their friend!
Facebook Joke 6:
What is the new face of communalism?
Facebook groups! People are so freaking aggressive about it!
Facebook Joke 7:
Why do Facebook users have lower grades than non-Facebook users?
Mushroom Coffee: All You Need To Know About This New Fad Weekly Predictions For Each Zodiac Sign: 8th-14th April, 2018 Does Milk Help You To Improve Your Skin Tone? Featured Posts
This is because you do not need to use your brains to be on Facebook.
Facebook Joke 8:
The Facebook status of a girl committing suicide; 'My Twitter account can remarry now…'
Facebook Joke 9:
What does a man tell God after he just dies?
Please let me go back. I forgot to tell my to wife to change her relationship status!
Facebook Joke 10:
Where will you find a man with too many debts? On Facebook trying to earn some cash in Mafia Wars!
Source: BoldSky
For more such jokes, subscribe to The Humor Column today!
Humor: Top 5 Funny Jokes Ever
If you love humor, this is the one for you. Here's a collection of top 5 funniest jokes of all time!
Teacher: "Anyone who thinks he's stupid may stand up!"
*Nobody stands up*
Teacher: "Im sure there are some stupid students over here!!"
*Little Johnny stands up*
Teacher: "Ohh, Johnny you think you're stupid?"
Little Johnny: "No… i just feel bad that you're standing alone…"
Baby: Mommy!
Dad: Come on, say daddy!
Baby: Mommy!
Dad: F*ck you, say daddy!
Baby: F*ck you, Mommy!
Mom: Honey, I'm home!
Baby: F*ck you!
Mom: Who taught you that?
Baby: Daddy!
Dad: Son of a b*tch.
got shot by the pizza guyyy
all i wanted was some onion ringggss
from McDonald's or Burgerkinggg
I believe i can soarrrr
mom slapped me in the grocery storeee
Even though im 24 I still got an imaginary dinosoarrrrr
I believe i can falllll I tripped on a bouncey ballll
Thought id post this funny jokes. Even though i got no votes.
Girl: Do you know who I am?
Boy: No…
Girl: I am the principal's daughter!
Boy: Do you know who I am?
Girl: No…
Boy: Good! *walks away*
I was barely sitting down when I heard a voice in the other stall:
"Hi, how are you?"
Me: (embarrassed) "Doin' fine!"
Stall: "So what are you up to?"
Me: "Uhhh, I'm like you, just sitting here."
Stall: "Can I come over?"
Me: (attitude) "No, I'm a little busy right now!!"
Stall: "Listen, I'll have to call you back. There's an idiot in the other stall who keeps answering all my questions!
Disclaimer: All images are sourced from the web. No copyright infringement intended.
Top 5 Hilarious Jokes on Batman
For what reason do we like making Batman jokes? Is it because – regardless of the character being something made for kids – there's unavoidable obscurity that exemplifies the style, as well as figured out how to spread out through whatever is left of the ordinance?
To such an extent that even the animated arrangement feels darker than consistent youngsters' modifying? Or on the other hand is it because the idea of a developed man and his more youthful companion circling in tights offers to us in an adolescent and guileless way? Or then again perhaps it's simply straightforward to make bat-based plays on words. Whatever the reason, we've assembled a rundown of our most loved jokes and plays on words in light of our most loved caped crusader. What's more, indeed, these are the Batman jokes that you merit, and need.
What Happens When Batman Sees Catwoman?
The Dark Knight Rises
What Do You Call It When Batman Skips Church?
Christian Bale
When Is Joker Not Plotting A Murder?
When he's riding his Harley!
What's The Difference Between Batman & A Robber
Batman can go into a store without Robin!
Batman & Robin Go Camping In The Desert:After setting up their tent and falling asleep, Batman wakes his faithful friend. "Robin, look up at the sky and tell me what you see."
Robin replies, " I see millions of stars."
"What does that tell you?" asks Batman.
Robin ponders for a minute.
"Astronomically speaking, it tells me that there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets.
Astrologically, it tells me that Saturn is in Leo.
Chronologically, it appears to be approximately a quarter past three.
Theologically, it's evident the Lord is all-powerful and we are small and insignificant.
Meteorologically, it seems we will have a beautiful day tomorrow.
What does it tell you, Batman?"
Batman is silent for a moment, then speaks:
"Robin, you idiot, someone has stolen our tent."
Did this crack you up well? For more such rib ticklers, subscribe to The Humor Column today!
Source: The Ranker
About the Humor Column
We give you a reason to laugh all day.
Updates2 years ago
Food Humor: Coconut Jokes
News2 years ago
Humor: God Damned Young People Have No Respect for Church!
Featured2 years ago
Football Jokes About Liverpool
Updates2 years ago
Food Humor: Ginger Jokes
News2 years ago
Funniest Ice-cream Jokes!
Updates2 years ago
Natural Humor: Turnip Jokes
General2 years ago
Top 5 Hilarious Jokes on Batman
Featured2 years ago
Food Humor: Peanut Jokes!