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I know I should never be surprised when the fanboys start complaining in the face of a great opportunity or good news. Since Marvel finally announced the details of the Epic line last week, message boards have been buzzing about the opportunity. Some people are figuring out how to write scripts. Some are learning how to letter. Others are trying to line up creative teams for their prospective books.
The counter-argument for this, of course, is that if this is something they really want to do, why didn't they start earlier? Why wait for Marvel to open up its doors? On the other hand, I know what it's like to not get started on something until there's some kind of practical application for it, or a deadline set. I'm a computer programmer. I learn languages when I need them to get something done, and not as a pure hobbyist thing. Without an end goal in mind, it's a boring academic exercise.
So, I say, good for the fans that are getting their dander up now. Even if the Marvel thing doesn't work out, maybe they'll make their own comics for the fun of it, or just learn some new skills that might come in handy later in life.
There is, however, the ugly side for people who just want to complain.
Yes, the "creator owned" segment of the deal is a little iffy. In fact, I don't think I'd feel terribly comfortable doing something I'd want to be creator-owned at Marvel. The language used in that initial phone conference wouldn't fill me with hope on that. Would I berate or belittle Marvel for this? No, I'd just not give them any characters I'd want to keep. I'd write a different story. If Marvel wants a series set in the Marvel Universe, anyway, wouldn't it be an easier sell to write for a Marvel character? Yes, you'll probably create a supporting character or two for the sake of your story, but it's a small price to pay. Leave your lifelong ambition in the bag for now. Save that character for later. That seems to have worked out pretty well for Todd McFarlane with SPAWN, no matter what you think of him.
ALIAS exists because of Brian Bendis. I doubt Joe Schmoe could have sold Marvel on that idea. You're talking about a proven creator with a solid track record doing ALIAS. That's why Marvel was willing to give Bendis some unusual slack. You, the on-line fanboy whose delusions of grandeur are limited to message boards and chat rooms where "R U" is an acceptable sentence, have to prove yourself first.
Marvel would also like to publish books that fit in its PG ratings space. Why is this such a bone of contention? Did you expect Marvel to start publishing Vertigo books all of a sudden? They experimented with MAX, and that doesn't seem to have taken off. What hubris it would be to suggest that your idea could save such a line.
I don't mean to be harsh. I know there's more than that on-line, but I want you to be aware of Marvel's thought process and what ends up being the truth. Heck, I often see it in the reactions this column gets. I'm already laying down the asbestos for the e-mails this column will no doubt get me.
Yes, I was contacted about the Epic line back in December, as were a host of other on-line writers. We were asked to keep quiet about it until the line had been announced. I'm happy to see that we all did. Word of the Epic line didn't start hitting until a few short weeks ago when Rich Johnston started to piece together some parts of the story, but not nearly all of it. Now that the line and most of its details are in the open, I can talk about my experiences with it.
I had a phone call with some people at Marvel last December. They sent a follow-up e-mail with most of the details you saw in all the press on the announcement last week. I did have a couple of ideas in mind. Those ideas were not for creator-owned material, but for Marvel characters. Yes, I do have ideas of my own, and I'm saving them for the perfect world in which I could self-publish them or somehow retain full ownership of them.
The bottom line is this: I'm not writing Pipeline as a way to get into the industry. I don't have a stack of scripts sitting here that I've toyed with in the past. Yes, I've written some fan-fics in the past (that were positively received by the creator of the characters, I might add) and a couple of different scripts for stories all my own. I've learned a lot about the process of writing from a blank screen that way and can respect the daunting task that so many writers face each and every month. I am not a creative writer first. I really have to be in the mindset to get going on that. When Epic opened, I wasn't there. I didn't have the fire burning inside of me to contribute anything I thought would be worthwhile, so I sat on it.
There's also the cynical and completely paranoid side that makes me sound like one of those whiney internet fanboys I was belittling a few paragraphs ago. The last thing I wanted to do was to give Bill Jemas the material to show how little writing talent the on-line community has by helping usher in a sea of horrible proposals to Marvel from reviewers. C'mon, you know he'd want to see that. He'd take the loss and publish the godawful pieces of crap just to embarrass the critics. I didn't want to risk that, particularly since I wasn't excited enough about an idea.
When the offer first came up, I thought about it for a couple of days and even posted a thread on the Pipeline message board asking people which defunct character they'd like to see in print again. I didn't mention why I was asking, and I think I included DC characters in the thread just to throw off any possible suspicion about the Epic line. The funny thing is that one of the first characters I thought of was echoed a couple times over in that thread. I made a quick jaunt to eBay, picked up some "reference" material, and started reading.
Ladies and gentlemen, I am here today to tell you that the SILVER SABLE series from the early 90s is one of the most abominable pieces of uninspired trash I've ever read. It's horrible, formulaic, occasionally exploitive, and an overall waste of time. The series lasted three years, but I couldn't stomach more than two years' worth of the material before I set it down.
The idea with Epic would be to rethink the character in a new way that doesn't necessarily negate anything that's come before. So here's a wide open character with plenty of possibilities -- bounty hunter, government agent, etc. -- who hasn't been around all that much in recent years. I had some ideas and some notes, but never the energy or ambition to put my head down and get to work on it. Thus, I never submitted anything to Epic and have no regrets about it.
I do hope someday to write a comic book that someone thinks enough of to publish. I'm only 27. I've got plenty of time. Epic is an amazing opportunity, though, and I'm honored to be amongst the first asked for proposals. I only wish the stars had aligned a little better for me on this one.
I give Silver Sable over to you fanboys looking for a character to recreate. Heck, for all I know there's already an accepted proposal at Epic for her. She seems too obvious not to jump at.
Side note: Joe Quesada was attached as an artist for the series in its early development in 1992. Luckily for him, he ended up elsewhere. If you're lucky, dear Epic Writer Wannabe, he'll look upon submissions for the character favorably.Good luck.
Update: Newsarama has a piece with Bill Jemas that clears up some of the details regarding the Epic line, including the PG rating issue and some of the finer points on the creator ownership portion of the deal. I still say your best bet at Epic is to write something featuring a Marvel character that doesn't necessitate a mature rating. In any case, it looks like the door is open to other possibilities, as well.
Mike Wieringo rejoins Mark Waid in time for FANTASTIC FOUR #67, a turning point in the characterization of Doctor Doom in anticipation of the coming storyline. The Fantastic Four, itself, doesn't appear in this issue. Instead, we're given a fascinating new look at the doctor with some spiritual and fantastic assistance. It's Waid's finest hour on the title, for reasons that I could only reveal with spoilers. If you want a Doctor Doom love story, you've come to the right place. If you want a classic Doctor Doom story where he takes no prisoners, this is also the story for you. If you've never read an issue of FANTASTIC FOUR, this one will still be accessible to you and well worth the time.
GLOBAL FREQUENCY #6 gives Warren Ellis the chance to expand a bit on a concept that might remind you a bit of Authority member, Jack Hawksmoor. Hawksmoor had an empathic relationship to cities. In GF #6, lead character Sita Patel is a "Le Parkour Runner," with the ability to find her way across a city in the most unusual manner or route. It's described as "treating the city as an obstacle course." Over the course of the issue, Patel runs across London over rooftops, through floors of buildings, down fire escapes, and more. I'm not sure it's a practical concept (surely running at top speed on the street is easier and quicker than running up and down to avoid a few corners), but it's a really cool one that works on the page as David Lloyd draws it.
As the cover indicates, BATMAN ADVENTURES #60 "goes out with a bang!" This is the final issue of the nearly-venerable animated series, wrapping up the tenure of Scott Peterson and Tim Levins on the series. Peterson goes all out and pits Joker against Batman. While I think the ending is a little too forced and filled with sunshine, it's still a valid story for this corner of the universe. It's family friendly in a warped sort of way. This is the last chance I'll have to say this, so I'll repeat it now for any Eisner Award judges, or anyone else who ever votes in a comic awards event: Lee Loughridge is one of the best colorists in the business, and his lack of nominations is striking. Take a look at this series someday and see how beautiful his coloring work can be.
STYLISH VITTLES Volume 2, "All The Way," continues the story of two college kids, Nanette and Tyler, who find themselves falling in love and falling into all the traps that involves. Tyler Page's story is refreshingly honest, as freeform as life itself, and wonderfully absorbing. This second volume may not be as strongly structured as the first volume, but the series of vignettes and slices of life that it shows are captivating and engaging.
I raved about the first graphic novel in this series last year. It hit home in many places for me personally, which no doubt colored my opinion of it. While this second novel heads off in different directions, the characters are still distinctly likable, and their little dramas and self-induced frictions ring true in ways that fictional characters all too often don't. Neither Nanette nor Tyler are characters easily summarized in one sentence. They're too real for that.
Page doesn't change artistic styles in this volume as much as he did in the first. The art still fits the story, but it doesn't veer off into mock superheroic sylings during "action sequences" or into ultra-realistic pen and ink work for the super-serious moments. There are moments where Page experiments with storytelling: breaking the fourth wall, letting his characters narrate for themselves on-camera, and even quoting a page from the first volume. The story works on additional levels, too, as an avatar for Tyler appears sporadically as part of an attempt to attach cosmic significance to his newfound relationship with beautiful two page spreads of starscapes. That helps tie this book in with the first, as well.
If there is a disappointment in this volume, it's that the lettering gets sloppy in places. I had to work on more than a few caption boxes and balloons to sort out the letters to read the sentences. This book would suffer for the sterile look of computerized lettering, but some more time spent on the hand lettering might not be a bad idea.
STYLISH VITTLES is a hefty volume (296 pages) published by Dementian Comics for a small $17 price tag. Your local retailer should be able to get it through Diamond Distributors if it's not already on the shelves. You can find more information on the book at its web site, including a multi-page preview of the new volume, to give you an idea of what it looks like and how it reads.
HIGH ROADS is a book that didn't get a lot of respect when it first appeared last year. It is, however, a respectable series with a great sense of humor and a daring adventurous streak that reaches out, grabs you by the collar, and refuses to let go.
A six issue mini-series in the ill-defined Cliffhanger! line of comics, it featured the much admired art stylings of Leinel Francis Yu and the much more controversial scripting work of Scott Lobdell. Lobdell is the stand up comic who broke into Marvel Comics more than a decade ago with Captain Ultra stories in MARVEL COMICS PRESENTS, before parlaying it into a run on X-MEN (during the Joe Madureira era) and heading out to Hollywood, while keeping his toes in the water with a series of comics mini-series. His writing style has always been filled with plenty of gags, and his personal style on display at conventions is often the same. HIGH ROADS reflects that. It's the kind of funny story that you wish Ron Zimmerman would write.
HIGH ROADS tells the story of a motley crew on the run in France at the end of World War II, and how they come together to save the world from Hitler's true Final Solution. That crew includes a failed kamikaze pilot turned samurai pilot-for-hire, a failed midget British actor currently playing Hitler in a French musical review, a naïve American soldier, and Hitler's original mistress. A wild plan to steal from Hitler runs into interference from a gang of Nazi ninjas, before turning into a western, a Saturday afternoon serial, a wild action piece, and an outright farce.
Yu's art has never looked better than it did in this book. That's in large part thanks to Gerry Alanguilan's inks and the suitably subdued coloring style of Avalon's Edgar Tadeo. It's so important for a comic to stand out in the crowd these days by creating its own style. HIGH ROADS succeeded in that, with a particular strength in covers that featured a painted movie poster montage motif.
HIGH ROADS will run you $15 at your favorite comic shop and is well worth every penny.
There's a Little Magazine That Could out there today that I'm afraid not enough people know about. That's probably because it isn't devoted to aiding the wannabe professionals out there. It isn't SKETCH, WRITE NOW, or DRAW!. I'm here today to remind you to look for it or to ask your local retailer for it. Yes, there is a bit of enlightened self-interest in this. I'm writing for the thing, and it's the first print publication that didn't go under quickly after asking me to write something for it. If only for that, it deserves your support. After all, don't we all root for the underdog? (I used to, but then my NCAA picks went down in a ball of flames.)
The magazine is called COMICS SPOTLIGHT, and the fourth issue just came out this past week. Each issue has a theme, and this one is Ultimate Marvel. Underneath a very pretty cover featuring the women of the Ultimate Marvel Universe from Claude St. Aubin, you'll find a series of articles and interviews about your favorite set of non-mainstream Marvel Universe characters. Included in the issue is "Pipeline Spotlight," a column written by yours truly that focuses in each issue on some comics that fit in with the issue's theme. In this case, I look at the highlights of the various Ultimate series, including (of course) ULTIMATE SPIDER-MAN #13, ULTIMATE X-MEN #6, and more.
The next issue is due out at the end of April, and I'll be writing something for the Batman theme of that issue sometime this week.
The magazine is in black and white and in standard comic book size for $5. It's a fan magazine run by intelligent fans. It's not colorful and gaudy like WIZARD, and it surely won't offend your sensibilities like WIZARD. You can see more about COMICS SPOTLIGHT at its home page.
Next week: A look at FABLES, the return of "Around the Web," and more reviews of the week's comics.
Various and Sundry has been updated all week with the mandatory look at the week's DVD releases, a review of THE LION KING on IMAX, some updates on television releases on DVD, Colin Quinn's TOUGH CROWD, and the harsh price of giving stuff away. All that, and more.You can e-mail me your comments on this column, or post them for all the world to see and respond to over on the Pipeline Message Board.
It's getting late and I still haven't locked down my final summer convention schedule. I have my plane tickets and hotel reservations for San Diego, so I'll definitely be there. I'm thinking about Chicago again this year, and Philadelphia is very likely since it's only a two hour drive from home.
Nearly 500 columns are archived here at CBR and you can get to them from the Pipeline Archive page. They're sorted chronologically. The first 100 columns or so are still available at the Original Pipeline page.


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NBC Orders Ellen DeGeneres-Steve Harvey Produced LITTLE BIG SHOTS
May 9, 2015 by Marisa Roffman
Filed under Little Big Shots
NBC is staying in business with Ellen DeGeneres, following the cancellation of ONE BIG HAPPY. The network has ordered LITTLE BIG SHOTS from DeGeneres and Steve Harvey, a new variety series that highlights talented kids. (Harvey is set to host.) Here's what NBC has to say about the new show… Tweet

subset: commoncrawl


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With a temper of Antant bags, Gavroche is an elegant vintage-like handbag, can be carried either in hand or on the shoulder thanks to the strap which dynamizes the silhouette and multiplies occasions where you can wear it.
A powdery, mat calf leather with an exceptional, grainy aspect that reinforces its suede look, absorbs the light and shows off the leather's curves.
Fully lined with 100% cotton twill, Gavroche has an interior into two separate, a zipper pocket and a large cell phone pocket suitable for smartphones. The bag is accessorized with buttons made from brass - Made in France.
33Lx17WX19H cm (excluding handles)
Cross over shoulder bag 33Lx17WX19H cm (excluding handles)
For current maintenance clean dirty parts with a special rubber for nubuck or apply special suede or nubuck product, after cleaning protect the leather with a waterproofing product.
Nubuck grained calf Abyss
Nubuck grained calf Terracotta
Saddle calfskin Black
Saddle calfskin Cumin
Saddle calfskin Chocolate
Saddle calfskin Cognac
Français |
English |


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Ramona Library kicks off 2017 with two free music concerts.
Sunny Side Strings, an all acoustic group based out of Ramona, will play at 6 p.m. Thursday, Jan. 12, as part of the library's Acoustic Showcase Series. Some people call their musical style "Roots," according to the group, "as it's a uniquely American music genre that encompasses old time, bluegrass, country, blues and more." The Acoustic Showcase Series features a concert on the second Thursday of each month.
The next day, Friday, Jan. 13, the library will host a piano concert at 1 p.m., performed by John Nilsen, founder of the Magic Wing recording label in 1987. Nilsen played 250 performances throughout the United States and Europe in 2015.
Ramona Library is at 1275 Main St. For more information, call 760-788-5270.


text: BMW M3 E92 GTR This mod was converted from IMT(International Modding Team)'s GTR2 version "BMW M3 E92 CUP". Thanks for the kindly sharing and permission from Selley. The 3D model is from Wildman_fr, thanks for his great work .Please refer to "BMW_E92_M3_READ_ME.txt" included in this zip for more information. bsimracing.Com


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Gregg T. Rennie, 44, Quincy, Massachusetts, a host on a radio talk show entitled "Your Money" was convicted of wire fraud and securities fraud. Rennie pled guilty to thirteen counts of securities fraud and one count of wire fraud.
At the plea hearing, the prosecutor told the Court that had the case proceeded to trial the government's evidence would have proven that Rennie operated a Ponzi scheme in which he stole no less than $3.2 million from a number of victims, including an elderly gentleman whom Rennie had known since his childhood, retirees who invested their retirement savings with Rennie, and individuals who listened to Rennie's radio show. Renne's victims also included a church congregation that had invested funds that the congregation had raised in anticipation of building a new church.
Rennie's scheme involved soliciting investment in what he described as risk free federal housing certificates with guaranteed rates of return. Rennie told his victims that these investments involved government grants or loans for housing projects, or were otherwise investments in federally subsidized real estate developments. As a variant on his housing certificate scheme, Rennie persuaded other victims to invest funds in annuity products that he claimed offered guaranteed rates of return.
Rennie, however, did not invest his victims' money in the products he described. Rather, he used the funds to pay for his own personal and business expenses as well as to make periodic payments to other victims. To conceal his fraud, Rennie showed some of his victims prospectuses for legitimate investment vehicles from respected investment companies. He further sent his victims bogus invoices which appeared to reflect their investments. These documents, however, bore no relation to the actual manner in which Rennie spent his victims' money.
"Financial crimes that prey on trusting investors, as alleged in this case, will not be tolerated. The U.S. Attorney's Office is dedicated to protecting investors from financial predators and will aggressively pursue those who exploit the trust of the investing public," said United States Attorney Carmen M. Ortiz
U.S. District Judge Edward F. Harrington scheduled sentencing for April 12, 2010. Rennie faces up to20 years imprisonment on each count, to be followed by 3 years of supervised release and a $5 million fine or twice the gains or losses that he caused.
The announcement was made by United States Attorney Carmen M. Ortiz and Warren T. Bamford, Special Agent in Charge of the Federal Bureau of Investigation – Boston Field Division.
The case was investigated by the Federal Bureau of Investigation with assistance from the United States Securities Exchange Commission. It is being prosecuted by Assistant U.S. Attorney James P. Dowden of Ortiz's Economic Crimes Unit


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Green Tips from the Cast of Glee, How to Celebrate Earth Day with the Stars, and More
Photo via Jerk Magazine
With the smash hit Glee, about highs and lows of a high school choir, coming back to the airwaves on April 13, the singing, dancing cast has been showing up all over--and showing off their talent for making green choices.The actors sat down with Oprah this week after joining the White House Easter Egg hunt last weekend, but they're still making time to discuss their environmentalism. Actress Lea Michele, who plays the club's head diva, Rachel, filmed an anti-fur PSA for PETA (without stripping down), while Jayma Mays, who plays the vintage-styled guidance counselor Emma Pillsbury, told Mother Nature Network that her favorite accessory is a purse made from soda can tabs and recycled thread. MNN also caught up with the rest of the cast--including Finn, Quinn, and Sue Sylvester--in the video below.
Stars Tune Up for Climate Rally
Photo via Grown Folks Musik
With Earth Day only a few weeks away, the Climate Rally released the lineup for its 40th anniversary concert on the National Mall on April 25--and in addition to a day of tree plantings, rallies, and speeches from Reverend Jesse Jackson, Margaret Atwood, Trudie Styler, and James Cameron, the event includes live musical performances from Sting, John Legend, The Roots, Bob Weir, and Patrick Stump, among others. Don't live in Washington, DC? Earth Day Network offers transportation from cities in Maryland, West Virginia, Virginia, Ohio, New York, and Pennsylvania--so you can add carpooling to your list of good green deeds. (Via Planet Green)
Celebrate Earth Day Pandora-Style
For a one-of-a-kind Earth Day celebration this year, spend your night at the Global "Home Tree" Benefit at the Nokia Theatre in Los Angeles, where Avatar director James Cameron and castmembers Michelle Rodriguez and Giovanni Ribisi will partner with other green celebrities--Jason Mraz, Rosario Dawson, Daryl Hannah--to raise money for the Los Angeles Partnership School and the Amazon Rainforest. The evening will also include a question and answer session about the film, a screening that highlights the environmental themes in the film, and sponsorship of a separate Avatar showing and environmental training program geared toward at-risk students in the city.
Carrie Underwood's Pet Cause
Singer and animal lover Carrie Underwood is so devoted to her rescue dog, Ace, that she's even set aside a role for him in her upcoming wedding to hockey player Mike Fisher--and she's teamed up with Pedigree's Adoption Drive to encourage other pet rescues by handing out $10,000 checks to shelters including the Pittsburgh Animal Rescue League and The Bideawee Animal Shelter in Manhattan. And as for how her fiancee feels about the cause? "Mike and Ace get along very well," she told Pittsburgh's WXPI. "We're actually working at some point on dog No. 2, so we're excited to go and look for one at some point." (Via Ecorazzi)
More about Green Celebrities
7 Fabulously Green Celebrity Homes
How to Go Green: Like Celebrities
What's Your Green Celebrity IQ?


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Alert Hewlett-Packard customers can receive up to $250 off Pavilion or Envy laptops and desktop PCs.
(PRWEB) June 24, 2014
Latest Pavilion and Envy discount coupons have just been listed on the Bizwaremagic.com small business site, which runs an online Laptop Buyer's Guide for its subscribers and visitors. Savvy Hewlett-Packard customers can receive up to $250 off popular HP brands such as Pavilion 15t-n200 and Envy 17t Touch.
HP coupons are usually classified into four separate groups: laptop, desktop, printer and general offers. Potential customers can take advantage of these offers simply by using these coupons and/or supplying the appropriate discount code at checkout. Free shipping is also offered with most coupons, but see the official HP Home & Home Office Store for all terms and conditions.
With the current list of "general coupons" customers can save $15, $75, $175 or $250 off the purchase of any configurable HP laptop or desktop. The higher the price, the greater the discount - for example, on systems priced at $1,199 or greater the purchaser can receive $250 off the retail price.
HP laptop coupons include the following offers: Get $50.00 off an HP Pavilion 17t which is priced at around $479 and save $170 on the HP Pavilion 15t-n200 with Windows 7 which is discounted at $579.99. In addition, get 15% off the Envy 15z-j100 which is listed at around $629 or save $170 off the HP Envy 17t for just $829.99.
Desktop PC offers include the following: Get $20 off the HP 110t Windows 7 Desktop PC which is priced at around $329 or save $170.00 on the HP Envy 700-215xt Desktop PC with Windows 7 which is discounted at $679.99. Receive $250 off the HP Envy Phoenix 810qe Windows 7 Desktop PC which is listed at $849.99 or get $100 off the HP Envy 700t which is priced at around $1,149.
There are also numerous printer coupons including an exclusive "in-cart" savings of $60 on the HP Officejet 6600 printer. In addition, get $60 off the HP LaserJet Pro MFP M127fw, which is listed at around $199 or save $70 off the HP LaserJet Pro M1536dnf multifunction printer which is listed for $249.99.
The 12 year old Bizwaremagic site regularly updates its Laptop Guide coupons, and potential customers should bookmark the site if they want to receive the latest offerings. It could mean saving $100s off any future HP purchases.
The special Bizwaremagic HP Notebook Coupons Page can be found here: http://www.bizwaremagic.com/HP_Notebook_Coupons.htm or download our comprehensive free laptop buying guide here: http://www.laptopcomputerguide.org. All products/companies mentioned above are registered trademarks of their respective owners and companies.


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See also "An Unworkable Mess," (New York Times, Room for Debate Blog, Dec. 11, 2009) by Drs. Steffie Woolhandler and David Himmelstein.
Dec. 10, 2009
Steffie Woolhandler, M.D., M.P.H.
Mark Almberg, Physicians for a National Health Program, (312) 782-6006, email@example.com
The Senate proposal to allow uninsured people over age 55 an opportunity to buy into Medicare constitutes yet another government subsidy to the private health insurance industry, a leading health policy analyst and single-payer advocate says.
Dr. Steffie Woolhandler, co-founder of Physicians for a National Health Program and professor of medicine at Harvard Medical School, told a radio host Wednesday morning, "One of the better provisions of the reform legislation was that it prohibited charging older people more than twice (or thrice in the some versions) as much as you charge younger people in the individual market. But by saying everyone over 55 in the individual market can be picked up by Medicare, you've really let the insurance industry off the hook."
Woolhandler continued: "That is, the highest-cost patients in the individual market will be taken off their hands and paid for by the taxpayers; and private insurance will remain the only option for people under the age of 55 and for anyone who gets their insurance through their employer. Another way of saying that is: if you now have private health insurance and you don't like it, you're forced to keep it.
"The buy-in to Medicare is only for those 55 to 64 and it's only for people who are not offered private health insurance through an employer. So it turns into just a subsidy to private health insurance: the taxpayers will pay for the high-cost patients and the health insurance industry can take the lower-cost patients."
Woolhandler, who also practices primary care at Cambridge Hospital in Massachusetts, is a prominent advocate for single-payer national health insurance, sometimes called an expanded and improved Medicare for All. She says research has demonstrated that replacing today's multi-payer system, with its wasteful paperwork and bureaucracy, with a streamlined single-payer system would save about $400 billion annually, enough to assure everyone comprehensive, quality care.
"I want to remind people that at its core, this bill takes $450 billion in new taxes from the taxpayers, and hands it over to the private health insurance as subsidies. So, the core of the bill is a financial strengthening of the private health insurance industry. Now, one of the small things that was good about the plan, that is, forcing the insurance industry to lower the prices for older enrollees, has been taken out of the bill, essentially."
Woolhandler also said the proposal for an exchange of private, nonprofit insurance plans for those under 55 will be of little benefit, noting, "It's similar to the menu that is offered to federal workers, but of course federal workers actually get money to buy the health insurance. They don't just get the menu, they get the money."
A full audio recording of the interview, conducted by an affiliate of KPFK Pacifica radio in Los Angeles, is available here.
Woolhandler is also co-author of several studies published in prominent medical journals this year, including one showing 62 percent of personal bankruptcies are linked to medical bills or illness and another showing that nearly 45,000 excess deaths annually are attributable to lack of health insurance.
Dr. Woolhandler and other leaders of Physicians for a National Health Program are available for interview on the most recent developments in the emerging health reform legislation.
Physicians for a National Health Program (www.pnhp.org) is an organization of 17,000 doctors who support single-payer national health insurance. To speak with a physician/spokesperson in your area, visit www.pnhp.org/stateactions or call (312) 782-6006.
See also "An Unworkable Mess," (New York Times, Room for Debate Blog, Dec. 11, 2009) by Drs. Steffie Woolhandler and David Himmelstein.


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Thoughts, musings and commentary in the midst of the daily trials and tribulations of a contract programmer.
These comments/views are my own, and in no way should be construed as those of my clients/Employers.
They are responsible for their opinions, I'm solely responsible for mine.
Monday, November 28, 2005
It's all about the work…
There's a certain sense of satisfaction in a job done, and especially in a job well done. Sometimes it isn't even about money; it's just about the work, the process of getting from where you are, to where you want to be. That, in and of itself, is a reward all its own at times.
I found myself thinking that on Sunday as I looked out the back door at the woodpile, safe from the rain that was falling, covered in a tarp I put over it when I finished Saturday night.
I felt the same sense of accomplishment I'd felt years before when putting in the wood up in North Bay. Although that process was a much bigger project, and spanned weeks rather than days, at the end, when that last piece of wood was tucked away in the woodshed, I'd feel like I'd really done something.
It struck me as I sipped my morning coffee and watched the rain fall that, for me, there's this incredible feeling that goes along with getting a project finished. In being able to see the results of my labors, in having a tangible, visible result, which is sometimes missing in the work I do for a living.
Don't get me wrong, there's a sense of accomplishment there too, but it's different somehow.
There's something in being able to see, touch, experience in all three dimensions, the fruits of your labors, that to me, is one of the sweetest moments in life.
I don't know as I've really thought about it, exactly this way, in the past. But now that I have, it explains why it was so difficult for me to give up the work with tangible results, and pursue a trade where your results are often invisible to anyone except the programmer who follows you.
I remember like it was yesterday, that day, five years ago after we'd put the last coat of paint on everything and the carpet installers had left. Maryan and I were sitting on the front steps, drinking a beer, as the sun set, and I was looking through the front door at what we'd done.
I remember thinking that it looked like a new house, one that had just been built. A 'model' you'd see in a new development. I actually had vivid four color flashbacks to what it looked like before we started. How it looked after I'd torn out most of the ceilings and walls, and had about half of the roof torn completely off. The look on Maryan's face when she first saw the destruction…
Then I looked over at her and saw she was gazing inside too, and had this little smile on her face. One that said to me… "Look at what we've done"… "I had my doubts, but he just kept at it, and I kept helping… Look at where we are now"…
You see she'd tasted it too… that sweet taste of success, of accomplishment… of finishing something many told you, that you couldn't do… and yet, here you are, standing in the middle of what you've done.
I doubt I'm doing the actual emotion involved justice. If you've ever felt it, you know what I'm talking about, and you're feeling it all over again. If you haven't, well I'm not sure anyone else could ever really make you feel it in words. About the only thing I can say is go out and build something, do something, anything, do the best job you possibly can… and then enjoy your success.
It may not be the best birdhouse, paint job, floor refinishing, etc ever done… but it will be the best one you've ever done!! It will also be the worst one you'll ever do, as each one you do after this one will be better than the one before.
In there lies the bittersweet taste of success. The knowing, that the next time will be better, and this will only stand as the best until you undertake another project. I choose to partake only of the sweet taste though, as it far out powers the bitter.
Do you get this feeling too? Does 'not knowing how' stop you from trying? Do you know why it does? If it doesn't, why do you brave the unknown?
Sunday, November 27, 2005
Some unrelated randomness...
Under the WTF category… in looking at my stats I saw someone arrived here after doing a Yahoo search for "elbow length enema gloves"…. Two questions… What in the hell would someone need those for… wait one question (I don't really want to know the answer to the first one)
How in the world did a search engine find over 2,000 links for that group of words… and how did this site get in that mix?? Search engine logic remains a total mystery to me. Every single time I think I've managed to grasp one aspect or another, something else happens that lets me know I really don't have a clue!
Maryan and I managed to put up about four (maybe five) cords of wood in the past couple of days, that should be sufficient to get us well into early (or maybe late) January, we'll probably need another cord or two before winters done with us here though.
We're relying on wood a little more this year, than in the past several, as the price of natural gas has jumped 50% from last year, and in all honesty, we both love a warm toasty house and ya can't get that on the current gas prices and still pay all the other bills!! I sort of thought that when I moved South, I'd be done with the firewood thing except for maybe a cord or so a year for an outdoor fire in the summer and indoors during the holidays…
Like most things in my life, it just hasn't turned out the way I originally thought it would!!
So, with my old body aching nicely from all the 'wood-work' there wasn't much left for the truck project. It sits, in my nice clean and orderly garage, waiting patiently for me to return to it.
That's one of the nice things about a project like this truck. I've got no real time sensitive deadline, and when other projects are moving to the front of the line, it can sit, and wait, for me to return to it. I know I'll be stringing Christmas lights next weekend, and giving the lawn and leaves a final going over.
I've also decided we need a couple of those outdoor floodlights on the back of the house and I'll be installing those next weekend too. It'll be nice to be able to walk outside to bring in an armload of wood and actually be able to see what I'm doing!
Maryan and I have a rather lazy day planned for today, just her and I, watching a couple of movies cuddling on the couch in front of the fire this evening.
I hope you've all had a great weekend.
Wednesday, November 23, 2005
For once, I'm going to be a joiner, on this one thing.
I am thankful this year. I'm thankful every year, and it seems that every year I find some reason that I'm feeling particularly thankful.
This year, hands down, it's the fact I have my Mom around for at least this one more holiday.
It wasn't looking very good a week and a half ago, and the truth is, I really didn't know how bad it had gotten until early this week. Mom was in congestive heart failure when she got to the hospital. Yeah, I know, we nearly lost her.
I may have really turned out to be a good thing, in a way. I called her nearly every night, and we'd talk until she wanted to rest. In the course of those talks I had occasion to tell her I thought she'd been not only a good Mom, but her and my Dad had led by example, not simply by words.
She paused for a moment and said "That was a really nice thing to say", I said "Mom, it's the simple truth, and I know you don't like compliments, but you need to know this, and know it in your heart"
Well… it was emotional, sure, but it was something she's really never taken any credit for. She's been filled with shoulda, coulda, woulda done this or that kind of ideas for many years. She felt she'd been to 'hard' on me, that there wasn't a need for her to be so strict. I'm sure there are many of you who know exactly what I'm talking about.
You see, I know though, that had she (and my Dad) been any less 'hard' I may have gone down and entirely different path. Hell, I nearly did anyway!
So not only am I thankful she's still with us, I'm extremely thankful for having had the good fortune to have had each of them as parents. I didn't know how fortunate, until I was in my late 30's really and began to see, for the first time, some of the things they'd tried to tell me when I was younger.
I'm also thankful for my wife, who daily reminds me of why I fell in love with her. She's had a rough couple of years health-wise, several operations and remains in a lot of pain. You'd never know it though, if you didn't know her. I don't know how she stays so cheerful, so upbeat and optimistic, day in day out, in spite of the pain.
No, she's not a 'saint', and yeah... she has her down days… but 9 days out of 10 she sucks it up and gets on with living life the best way she can, without any sort of personal 'pity-party'. In fact, when she is feeling 'down' she generally apologizes for it!!
She's always; got an 'ear' for me to bend, tolerates my computer / hot rod / motorcycle / multiple project personality, finds ways to make me smile even when I'm trying to enjoy a good pissed-off, celebrates my successes and helps me 'dust off' from my failures.
I still find her sexy in a nightgown, or a pair of coveralls… all she has to do, is smile that smile she has and I'm a goner…
I can't imagine it gets much better than this relationship-wise.
I'm thankful I'm working on a project that I really enjoy. That I have something new, and challenging to work on nearly every week, because to me, that's why, I do what I do.
I'm thankful for those of you who stop by here, read what I have to say and share your thoughts with me. I feel we're all connected, if even only by electrons and if I could, I'd invite you all over for dinner, I know there'd be some incredible conversations!
Last, and certainly not least, I'm thankful to be alive, (there were rumors of my death ya know) and to have learned how to enjoy each day the best I can. That we're able to give a little back, to the community and those having less fortunate times again this year.
What thankful thoughts are you having as you get ready for the holiday?
Monday, November 21, 2005
Some updates….
She's supposed to be coming home today, but then again that was also supposed to happen yesterday. I'm encouraged that she's well enough to go back home, but concerned she'll let things go again if she begins having renewed symptoms.
I guess we'll just have to play it one day at a time.
Once again, I want to thank each and everyone of you who sent your well wishes and prayers her way, it means a lot to all of us I assure you!!
On the caboose…
Well Wolleybugger never called over the weekend so I'm not sure what to think about that. However, in Sunday's paper they did indicate that someone else had already adopted the second car. So, I've dropped a voice mail, and an email to each of the folks spearheading the efforts and offered my assistance in whatever way they feel I could be of help.
I guess we'll just see how it all plays out. For the record, I'm fine with being a 'grunt' on the project, in fact I'll probably have more fun in that capacity!!
On work projects…
I've been working on a project for the mortgage insurance company. Mainly a tweak to the call accounting reporting system I did for them last year. I'm expecting to deliver it, after several delays, tomorrow. With any luck it will perform as expected and that one can get moved to the 'done' column.
The D&B merge project is heating up on the job. We've just placed the latest info from D&B in the testing regions and have run two preliminary passes through the data; with any luck at all we'll be in full phase testing by the Monday after Thanksgiving.
With everything else that's been going on, I really haven't had much to 'blog' about.
The impending decision on my contract renewal is still up in the air. I know I'm still 'in the mix' at the moment, but the review process is on going. It'll be good to know, one way or the other, and sooner, rather than later!
Contracts, and especially renewals, are the toughest part of the contract programming business for me. If I know that the gig is going to end, I can simply begin looking for another, but, it's this period of uncertainty that really tends to drive me crazy.
I'm in the 85-90% confidence category with respect to my contract being picked up, but that 10-15% 'not knowing' is just crazy making for me.
I think it's this sort of thing that keeps a lot of folks who could be very successful as contractors, from entering the field. I know that I got very comfortable in my last 'real job', even though, in the end, that comfortable feeling was not at all warranted.
Most of us let ourselves believe, day to day, week to week, that we'll simply continue to be 'employed' by our present employer. Despite hearing about business closings, layoffs, corporate downsizing, etc… we still get up everyday believing our jobs are safe and things will just continue.
I think one of the things I like about contract work is that you know when the job starts, and ends. You know when you have to start looking for a new gig, usually in plenty of time to find one. In this case, knowing they wanted to renew the contract for another year has sort of placed the entire new contract search on hold. It's a situation I've not really been in before.
Time will tell if my decision to lock myself in without a signed deal was a good decision, or not. I know I made it because I've enjoyed this project. The company, the people as well as the work have all been great. I'd rather renew here than start another project, but, in the end, I'll do whatever I have to do.
Thanksgiving is around the corner, and there's so much to wrap up before Wednesday. Then again, it seems this way every year as the holidays approach.
Are you ready for the holiday? Big plans? No plans? How are you planning to enjoy Thanksgiving?
Saturday, November 19, 2005
I'm Gonna Fix Your Caboose…
I met a local guy through this blog a few days ago. He left a comment here; I dropped by his site, we exchanged comments; amazingly we both love bikes, and live here in Burlington.
It also turns out we were also both moved by an article in the local paper this week. I tried to find a link for you, but, it seems the local paper doesn't 'do the net' all that well.
To make this long story a bit shorter, there are two 'retired' train caboose cars on display here in town, just outside of downtown. I've loved trains since I was a kid, in fact those of you who've been stopping by here for a while may remember Maryan and I went to the train museum in Roanoke on our honeymoon.
It turns out the town had been planning to sell the cars, to get rid of them, quietly of course. However as word got out, one local woman stepped up and adopted one of the cars, and this article basically was saying that unless someone else adopts the other, it will be gone.
I wanted to step up, I really did. I've restored one of about everything that rolls, except a rail car. I've love the chance to give something back to the town, to preserve that little piece of history for kids to see. But, let's face it, I work a lot of hours, I'm not exactly independently wealthy, and I had doubts I could pull it off on my own.
Enter Wooleybugger.
I drifted into his site today, and there was his post about exactly that topic. He said he'd like to help, but isn't wealthy, is willing to work and even try to raise some money… I left him a comment, said I was 'in' if he was serious.
He dropped me an email Friday night, shortly after I'd sent an email to the newspaper writer looking for information on how to 'adopt' this car. I'm hoping he and I can talk on Saturday, begin to put a game plan together and make this happen.
I know I can gather up some bodies for the grunt work, the real work will be getting some money raised.
Burlington is a town that was born of the railroads. It started out as what was known as a 'Company Shop'. Essentially it was a place the carriers brought engines, and cars for repair. The town grew up around that operation. Later the mills came and went, but the town has remained.
I'd like to see this little piece of the town's history saved from slipping into obscurity.
I'll keep you all posted on our progress. Obviously our first hurdle is getting approved to adopt the car, and then the real work will begin. With winter right in front of us, and the car won't be coming to my shop, it's going to make for some interesting days and nights!
If there's anyone else who stops by here, who is also local and would like to get involved, please let Wolleybugger or myself know.
Friday, November 18, 2005
It's time to talk code again….
I spoke with her on the commute home yesterday and she's doing pretty well. She's still on Oxygen during the day, but is getting though the night without it. They're still running a bunch of tests on the old girl, but besides still being very tired, she seems to be recovering pretty well.
The Dr's seem to be debating the next step, one wants to do a cardiac cath, the other doesn't think that's called for... typical.
I told her she's gotta stop scaring us like that as I'm not getting any younger either!!
My thanks to each and every one of you who've expressed your concern and well wishes for my Mom. All I can say is you are all the best… and I appreciate each one of you!!
So… back to code stuff….
(for those of you who have already asked, I formated the code segment with my latest utility "Prg2Html", it takes a FoxPro program, it sets the 'color syntax' and preserves the formatting for posting)
I thought I'd talk a bit today about updateable 'remote views' and VFP.
A remote view, is a look, at a table that is not native to VFP (SQL, Oracle or DB2 for example). One of the great tools in the VFP arsenal is the ability to work with these non-native tables almost as though they were native.
FoxPro handles the data translations, behind the scenes, between the two systems so all you have to do is focus on the tasks at hand.
I've been working with, as most of you know, a process that writes literally hundreds of thousands of records to DB2 database tables, on a mainframe, from Visual FoxPro.
VFP does a great job with this type of work. However, there are a number of things that can go wrong, that you wouldn't normally see when writing directly to native VFP tables, or even tables stored in SQL Server, or Oracle that are on the network.
One of the major issues with some DB2 systems is that the administrators place ODBC type access at the very lowest priority, and that the error messages returned to the client are less than clear as to what the problem is. They put the ODBC access behind everything else, primarily (or so I've been told) because of the burden it places on the server itself.
As a result, these major updates often take several hours. So I kick them off as I'm leaving for the day rather than tie up my desktop system and network/mainframe resources during the day.
Unfortunately, if one of the several hundred things that could go wrong, does go wrong, I come back in the morning to a partially completed update process.
I hate when that happens, and I'm not at all into 'baby-sitting' computers, so, I implement a recovery process in an attempt to mediate that risk.
First, I wrap the actual write/update process in a 'DO WHILE' loop, so that the actual program looks something similar to the code segment at the end of this post.
In reality, I've actually got a lot more going on between these various routines than what I've shown you here. The concept however is identical.
Ok…why do I do it this way?
I find that this cleans up the entry point, allows me to reuse the open and close files code, as well as allowing the process to auto restart if communication can be reestablished with the mainframe. It saves a lot of 'crappy' mornings, believe me!
I've been focusing quite a bit lately on ways to make programs 'self-repairing'. With so many of the problems we encounter in the field not being things you'd 'expect' to see. But, instead, they're the result of a problem on the remote system that is not always clearly reported back to your program, for a variety of reasons (usually beyond your control).
The harsh truth is, that network errors are real, fairly common and at times nearly impossible to (easily) recover from. If you've ever lost a document, or a spreadsheet, because of some problem that prevented you from saving it, you know that even big companies, with huge resources still can't get their applications to recover from everything.
The key, in my mind, is to identify those problems you can code around, and code for them. The increased reliability is such a huge improvement in the end result that the additional process times, and coding efforts, are a small price to pay. Or at least I think so.
Do you think so? How do you handle programmatic recovery from system/network errors? Do you simply hope they won't happen? Is there any initiative where you work to move in this direction?
-- Code Segment Example --
PROCEDURE RemoteLoad
WAIT WINDOW 'Beginning Remote Update....' NOWAIT
STORE 0 TO x1,x2,x3,x4,x5,OpenCount
lStat = .T.
lUpdt = OpenTheFiles()
IF lUpdt
lDone = .F.
DO WHILE ! lDone
lDone = MainProc()
IF lStat
MESSAGEBOX('Done.... - Normal Ending')
MESSAGEBOX('Abend, Could NOT Auto Restart!')
* Functions and Procedures *
* -- MainProc *
FUNCTION MainProc
SELECT CifDunsOct
x = ALEN(dbArray,1)
STORE 0 TO Y,y1,z
a = SECONDS()
IF !SEEK(CIF_Customer_ID,'vrCifDunsCust')
*-Space fill any NULLS in the fields....
FOR i = 1 TO x
fldName = ALLTRIM(dbArray(i,1))
IF ISNULL(&fldName) OR EMPTY(&fldName)
VarMem = 'm.' + fldName
&VarMem = SPACE(dbArray(i,3))
INSERT INTO vrCifDunsCust FROM MEMV
*--Flush changes to remote every 20 records
lUpdOk = TABLEUPDATE(.T.,.F.,'vrCifDunsCust')
IF !lUpdOk
FOR i = 1 TO 3
lUpdOk = TABLEUPDATE(.T.,.F.,'vrCifDunsCust')
IF lUpdOk
*--Exit FOR
IF !lUpdOk
lStat = UpdtRecover()
*--Exit Scan
y1 = y1+Y
b = SECONDS()
WAIT WINDOW ALLTRIM(STR(y1/(b-a),10,3)) + ;
' Records per second Written.... ' NOWAIT
z = z + 1
IF MOD(z,105) = 0
WAIT ALLTRIM(STR(z)) + ;
' Records Processed... ' WINDOW NOWAIT
z = z + 1
WAIT ALLTRIM(STR(z)) + ;
' -Records Exist and were Skipped... ' WINDOW NOWAIT
IF lUpdOk
lUpdOk = TABLEUPDATE(.T.,.F.,'vrCifDunsCust')
*--If we're really done, this will also
* terminate the entire process
*-- Otherwise returning it will restart the process...
RETURN lUpdOk
* -- UpdtRecover *
FUNCTION UpdtRecover
LOCAL xlRetVal
'Table Update Failed!! - Attempting to recover...' ;
xlRetVal = OpenTheFiles()
IF !xlRetVal
MESSAGEBOX('Table Update Failed!!' + ;
CHR(13) + 'Could Not Auto Recover')
*--Set global to drop out of loop, we can't recover
lDone = .T.
RETURN xlRetVal
* -- CloseTheFiles *
FUNCTION CloseTheFiles
IF USED('vrCifDunsCust')
USE IN vrCifDunsCust
IF USED('CifDunsOct')
USE IN CifDunsOct
* -- OpenTheFiles *
FUNCTION OpenTheFiles
LOCAL xlRetVal
xlRetVal = .T.
OpenCount = OpenCount + 1
*-- Set up the error handler
xcCurOnErr = ON("ERROR") && Save original Error setting
ON ERROR xlRetVal = .F.
P:\IRFDATA\PROD\dbtables\cif\cif.DBC SHARED
IF xlRetVal
SET DATABASE TO cif
IF xlRetVal
IF !USED('CifDunsOct')
USE cif!CifDunsOct IN 0 ALIAS CifDunsOct SHARED
IF xlRetVal
USE cif!vrCifDunsCust IN 0 ALIAS vrCifDunsCust
IF xlRetVal
SELECT vrCifDunsCust
IF xlRetVal
*--Wait for View to complete loading
INDEX ON CIF_Customer_ID TAG cif_id
IF xlRetVal
RETURN xlRetVal
Technorati Tags: Microsoft - VFP - Visual - FoxPro
Tuesday, November 15, 2005
In the blink of an eye…
That's exactly how I felt last night.
I had a pretty good day at work despite some system and database issues that prevented me from finishing a few items I needed to, I still felt good about my progress as I walked out the door. The ride home was pretty uneventful traffic-wise, which is always a good thing when you have a 50 mile commute!
I had anticipated digging into a project I've been trying (and need) to finish for a client, so I could deliver it this week. I also had some good news to discuss with my wife, and a new client to call and set up the first billable meeting with.
All in all I was rolling!
You see, on the ride home I'd called a business associate who'd taken a position with Microsoft about a year ago, and we haven't talked much since. In the course of talking he informs me that if I'm ever "in the market" he's pretty sure the folks at Microsoft would like to talk to me!! That might not seem like a lot to those of you not in the industry, but to a guy like me, that's sort of like a minor league ball player getting a call from the 'bigs'. Flattering, in and of itself, even if, nothing else ever comes of it
So, I was pretty excited, as you might imagine, as I pulled into the driveway.
One of the first things I wanted to get out of the way was the call to my new client. After a short chat with Maryan, I headed back to the office to do just that. I had to check for an answer from another client before I could make that call though.
One of the first headers to pop up was an email from my sister Kathy.
She'd sent it in the morning; to let everyone know that Mom had been rushed to the Hospital, again, early Monday morning. She'd been in severe respiratory distress along with a number of other problems.
I sat there stunned, I'd talked with Mom on Sunday afternoon. She'd mentioned that she wasn't feeling well, but, was waiting for Monday to see her doctor as she didn't want to go to the emergency room.
Fortunately, when I got the number for her room from Kathy a bit later in the evening, and called, she's feeling much better and this time the doctors seem to actually have a clue on how to treat her.
After I hung up though, I found myself thinking… what would I have done differently, had I known she was this sick? Should I redouble my efforts to find a gig closer to where she lives? Why haven't I tried to visit more often? As well as a thousand other woulda, coulda, shoulda's….
In the final analysis, there really isn't much I could do differently. She'd hate it if she knew I was altering my life, simply because she's getting older. I wouldn't be able to do much more for her than Kathy can…. My Mom is definitely her own woman, she's going to do, what she wants to do, period.
This event did serve to remind me though, that life is too precious and far too short, for us to waste it. That the next phone call you have with someone, could well be the last one. There are no 'do overs' folks, we only get one chance to do the right thing for those we care about.
So while I'm relieved today that she's feeling better, I've resolved to talk with Kathy this weekend and find out how to help her feel less 'alone' in dealing with these types of issues. She, and our youngest sibling, are the only two of us living nearby, and I know she's left dealing with most of this on her own. I don't know exactly how yet, but I'm going to find a way to shoulder some of that responsibility as well.
I'll find some other things, ways, to help from here as well. When I do, I'll share them here. One thing I've already done is set up a toll free number that Kathy, Mom or Andy can call 24/7 so no one has to worry about the 'toll' or finding a pay phone if there's no 'cell' handy.
What would you do?
If you knew, that you, or someone close to you was going to die, and very soon?
Would you change the way you're dealing with them today? Is there something in your relationship with them you'd "fix"?
Why not do it anyway, even if they're in perfect health?
Technorati Tags: Relationships - Life - Change
Monday, November 14, 2005
Emergency Services
I didn't catch his actual age, but from his looks I'm guessing late 20's or early 30's.
It seems he'd wanted to be in the fire service since he was a young kid, and to be a paramedic nearly that long as well.
As a result of his years of training and subsequent life saving efforts, he's now HIV positive. Most likely it's the result of a needle stick, or blood splatter, from an infected patient. He was fortunate in that he found out in enough time that he did not pass it on to his wife, or children. However, because he's now a carrier, he can no longer work as a paramedic.
He continued fire fighting for a while, but soon his doctors were advising him that running into burning buildings, inhaling potential carcinogens etc… was not really in the best interest of his health.
I know I've talked in the past about how I felt about the men and women I served with in the Fire (and ambulance) service. I've not really talked much about this part, or the potential for 'downside', of the work.
It is dangerous work folks, not just the visible, 'in your face' dangerous, but at all sorts of levels. Despite the years of training, the best gear and special precautions, it can all still go very wrong.
One of the things that really stood out to me as I watched this program, and listened to this young man was his attitude. He wasn't all 'Woe is me', instead I could hear the sadness in his voice as he talked about having to stop being a paramedic, and then his subsequent decision to leave the fire service.
In spite of his own personal hardships, it was evident he'd still rather be doing those things, than anything else in the world.
I'm here to tell you, the folks I've talked about to you in the past, to a person, are exactly the same way. They love the work and the sense that they've done something "good", for someone else, at the end of the day.
It's rarely about 'the money' with these folks; they certainly aren't going to be "livin' large" on what they find in their paychecks. Instead they've chosen to take a different path than most of us would, or could. To put caring for, and protecting, the lives, needs and property of others, in front of nearly everything else, including their own well being.
I remain honored to have had the opportunity, in my life, to know, and work alongside, people like this!
Technorati Tags: Paramedic - Fire Department - People
Sunday, November 13, 2005
Choices, choices and more choices…
- Do whatever it is you've been doing
- Do something/anything different..
I think it boils down, in the end, to how you feel about the life you're living. If you're happy, really happy with your life, job, relationship, lifestyle, etc… then the first choice is most likely going to be the one for you.
On the other hand, if you've got areas of your life that you're not happy with, you need to make a choice from the possibilities presented by choice number two.
That's where things begin to get complicated, for me anyway.
The "something different" options are not often clear, and even if they are clear, they're not always easy. I know that when it became clear to me that I was not happy in my first marriage, I avoided the clear choice of leaving, for many years. Instead I tried everything I could think of to try and regain that original happiness I'd felt.
I filled my life with all sorts of 'other things', tried to focus on what was right instead of what was wrong and spent a year talking with a therapist about ways to work through what I was feeling. I even switched jobs in hopes that change would allow me to get enough stress relief and see it wasn't the marriage, but the job that had me feeling so bad.
In the end though I saw that neither I, nor my wife, were really 'happy' any longer.
I made the choice to separate and get divorced.
It remains one of the more difficult decisions I've ever made. I remember thinking, here I am, late forties, balding, a bit overweight and haven't dated in well over 20 years… this is not going to be a very 'fun-filled' adventure. I knew though, that having the chance to find the kind of relationship I knew I wanted, was better than standing still.
Regardless of knowing, staying put sure as hell felt a lot more comfortable than not.
Those of you who are regular readers know that eventually, that decision led to my meeting and marrying Maryan. We have the kind of relationship I was hoping to find. It's not perfect, everyday, but we interact in ways I'd only dreamed were possible before, so it's certainly perfect to me!
I've also made a lot of choices over the years, based on what I'd call "inadequate" information. Where the decision I made, had I actually had all the information, would most likely have been different. I think those are the decisions, that sometimes come back to 'haunt' us (or me at least). Where we find ourselves second guessing our decision, start thinking of what 'might have been' if we made our choice with all of that information at our disposal.
That my friends, is an exercise in futility, one destined to be 'crazy making'. We can't ever go back, to that exact spot in time, armed with that (what we now know to be) exact information and redo the decision process. Life just does not work that way. I'm not even sure I'd like it, if it were that way.
Life is fluid, a continuum, billions of conditions changing every nanosecond of every day.
I've probably made 1,000 'bad' decisions, for every 'good' one. Each one though, I made thinking it was a good one. Well, ok, I've made some (very few fortunately) knowing they were bad, but even those I thought I'd at least enjoy part of the outcome! The rest where based on what I knew at the time, and believed would bring me the outcome I wanted.
Sometimes, I got exactly the outcome I'd been hoping for, and when I got it, found it was far different than I'd envisioned it to be. Others, the decision got me nowhere close to where I thought it would take me. In each case though, I did what we all do (or should do), I simply decided to make another choice, hoping this time I'd get closer to where I really wanted to be.
What's the point of this ramble?
The point is, we always have choices. Sometimes they're not very clear, and often they're very difficult, sometimes feeling nearly impossible, but they're always there.
It's always the same two I mentioned earlier, do nothing different, or do something different.
If you do nothing different, you'll most likely continue getting what you've always gotten. You'll be in the same career, relationship, house etc… and if you're happy, there's absolutely nothing wrong with that.
If, on the other hand, you're like me, and you've always got another dream or two waiting for you to explore them, you'll have to make a choice to start exploring, or not. To me, often times that's the difficult part, finding a way, to explore the new dream (or dreams) without losing any of the stuff that makes me really happy today.
You see if I went off to pursue one of my dreams, and achieving it cost me my relationship with Maryan, the price of that decision and achievement would just be too high for me to justify.
I'd give up a lot for a dream I wanted, money, stability, all sorts of material possessions. I know that, because I've done it, and several times in my life. I've spent every dollar I earned, and every penny I'd saved, sold off everything I could sell, in pursuit of a dream, and ended up without the stuff, and without the dream.
I eventually got more stuff, saved more money, and even though I never got exactly where I'd intended to go, I have the memories of the effort. I remember the 'rush' of jumping headlong into (for me) uncharted territory, the thrills at each little advance, the single-mindedness of effort and pure, simple joy of believing in the possibility.
These days, as I've begun for the first time to ponder retirement and especially our financial needs in retirement, I've found myself wondering (at times) if those choices were wise. If I wouldn't have been far better served saving the money, focusing on 'one' career instead of trying out nearly a dozen and now being at this particular place in time with a hefty 'nest egg' of retirement funds.
In the final analysis, I end up saying "No", that even if I end up living a life (in retirement) where I have to take a job as a Wal-Mart greeter to make ends meet, I'll be much richer in that life, with the memories of all I've done. I believe those memories will make my life far richer than it ever could have been simply because I'd be able to sit in an easy chair and know I had no money worries.
Rich Denny's Mom said to me once, while I was still in my early 20's, "you just do what you want to do, don't you?"… I remember thinking for just a minute, about what she'd said, and responded with a "Yeah, I guess I do". I recall she smiled a little, and added, "Good, if you continue to do that, you'll never have regrets".
I've sort of continued to do that, more often than not, since then.
Sure, I've made compromises, continued to work in jobs I didn't really even like any more, simply because the money was good. Taken the easy road a time or two, simply because I didn't have the energy (at the time) to venture down a rougher road. Chose to stay put in a place, when I should have moved on, because the unknown scared me more than standing still.
When all is said and done, we make our choices and live with the results. The beauty of life is, if we don't like the result, we get to make another choice! We can't go back, and change the last one, but we can make another and alter our path once again.
So, do you have regrets? Do you still struggle with past decisions? Or, do you let them go, make new choices and move on? How do you think your 'method' is working for you so far?
Hope y'all are having a great Sunday. Me, I'm going out in the shop and get reacquainted with the truck project!!
Technorati Tags: Choices - Life - Decisions
Saturday, November 12, 2005
I've been reflecting…again
It's not a time I'm particularly proud of on one hand, and yet on the other contains some of the more memorable experiences I've had.
I'm not proud of it, primarily because I was drinking then, often, and normally to excess. There was a period, of nearly a year, that every night after work a buddy of mine and I went to the same bar, drank and played foosball until closing, went home and got up the next day and did it all over again!
The strangest thing to me is, that then, that felt as though it was 'normal' behavior. That it was what every single guy did after work, went out, got drunk (of course hoping to get lucky), went home and repeated the process.
I was an auto mechanic in those days. Mark and I worked in a shop in Whitesboro, NY, normally a 12 hour day from 9am to 9pm, at closing we'd get cleaned up, change clothes (there was an actual 'locker room' at this place) and head out to a bar up the road called "Tiny Bubbles" where we'd stay until closing.
I don't remember either of us ever 'getting lucky' in that place, but then again, I'm not sure I'd remember if we had. In retrospect, I'm pretty sure we didn't, we were always pretty drunk, and the experiences from the rest of my life lead me to believe that most women avoid severely intoxicated men like the plague.
With good reason I might add, for the most part I have no doubt we were obnoxious!!
If I wasn't drinking, or working, I was restoring or rebuilding a car or truck, and I rarely drank when I had a tool in my hands. Not because I had some 'safety' concern, but primarily because back then, if I was in a shop, I worked. If I was in a bar, I drank; each place had its own special set of behaviors, and I never crossed the two.
That activity went on from 1973, until late in 1975. I got a promotion in '75 that moved me out of the garage and into the front office and a suit. Now we had drinks at lunch, drinks at meetings, and a couple of drinks after work, but no one hung out until closing.
Well, not the work crowd, my other friends though, well they'd started moving Friday (which was the night most of those folks started drinking for the weekend) earlier and earlier into the week. Soon, we were closing bars on Tuesday and Wednesday nights and Monday night was the only night you wouldn't find us out drinking.
It all pretty much stopped in early 1976 when I took a job as a manufacturer's sales rep with a firm out of Pittsburg, PA. I was hitting the road, most mornings before 7:00am, and the only time you'd find me drinking was at business dinners and in the hotel bar with the 'other' road warriors (automotive industry sales reps) passing time before we got some sleep.
I'm pretty thankful for that job; it broke a pattern that probably would have killed me eventually. I'm, at times, amazed that none of us 'regulars' ever had an accident, or, ever got a ticket for driving while intoxicated. We were certainly blessed in that regard.
I say it was also a memorable time because I had some incredible experiences then. I restored my 1959 Triumph TR3 then, Billy Deyle and I took it apart and put it back together, and it was pretty sweet when we finished it!
His brother Jim and I were very good friends then, and we got into climbing and hiking in the Adirondacks. Each of those trips is a memory I'll have until I die. Each one of the trips was different and wonderful in its own right. I remember one night, where we'd made camp and shortly after dark a group of college aged guys showed up to make camp as well.
These guys had packed (as in carried) in, not only all the normal camping stuff, but lawn chairs and beer as well! It was the first and only time Jim and I drank a beer on an Adirondack mountain top.
It was also during this time that I went to the NHRA Summer Nationals (called the 'sunburn' nationals that year) in Englishtown, NJ and got to work with the Accel ignition team.
A year later I was at the NHRA World finals in Indianapolis, IN with Amalie Oil, Raymond Beadle and the Blue Max funny car team. I also got to have dinner that weekend with Shirley Muldowney as Amalie was one of her major sponsors… You know, the famous, only woman to ever beat 'Big Daddy' Don Garlits, Top Fuel driver? It was an honor and a very exciting evening for me, to have met her.
I learned, at that event, that despite my efforts at becoming a 'world class' drinker, I was simply an 'also ran' compared to those oil industry guys!! I can still remember us being crammed into the rental car, (the trunk full and each of us with several cases on our laps) after having bought all the Stroh's the grocery store had, and then filling the motor home's fridge with it when we hit the track infield.
There are probably a dozen or more events, like the ones I've mentioned that transpired in those years. All of them incredible memories I treasure. I wonder sometimes though, if they would have been better, worse, or the same, without all that alcohol?
In the end I know it (the alcohol) probably didn't make any real difference as during these events, it was rarely (well intoxication anyway) a part of the overall experience.
I hadn't thought much about those years recently, but now, in thinking about them I've decided that it was all part of the process. The process of 'finding' myself, discovering what worked, and what didn't in my life. Sorting out relationships, family, work, friends and personal… There were ups, and downs, I fell in, and out of what I thought was love (turned out to just be lust) several times… learning a little about myself, and other folks along the way.
Would I change it if I could? No. Every single thing that I've experienced and done has me exactly where I am today. I'm happy with my life today, if I went back and changed anything, I'd be somewhere else and maybe not quite so happy with how it's all turned out.
I'm going to look for some pictures from those days. I know I have one with the Blue Max team in the winners circle at Indy. I'll gather them up, scan them and eventually post them over at the photogallery for those of you who'd like to see them.
Friday, November 11, 2005
5,000 Visits…
Thanks to YOU!!
I have to admit, I'm surprised, stunned, pleased, bewildered and elated. All at the same time.
In addition, both hit counters are over the 10,000 page hit count; I really never dared to dream I'd have so many visitors. So many folks who stop by, read my musings and share their thoughts with me. I really don't have words to express how much I look forward to those comments!
It was May 14th when I added the first 'counter', and I've learned a few things along the way.
- How often you post (update) your blog, or website for that matter, has a lot to do with where you show up in the search pages.
- The stranger the search, the deeper into the results folks will go to find what they're looking for.
- There aren't many folks out there searching for 'FoxPro' information as despite mentioning at every possible opportunity, I've yet to have anyone land here as the result of a search for it.
- There are however quite a few folks looking for Jaro-Winkler information (the core piece in my POL utility), more than I would have imagined.
I think though, that one of the most important things I've learned out here in "bloggerspace" is that everyone has something they can share. That each of our life experiences, good and bad, can serve to guide others on what to do, not to do, or simply amuse them.
I've learned that life is truly for the living, that my life is not mundane (or any more mundane than most others). That we all have our own unique dreams, goals and aspirations. Some of us plunge headfirst into them; others take a more cautious path.
That regardless of the path we take, we all gain a little something with each step we take.
I've also discovered that despite how anonymous it can feel, this place is far from anonymous. While I certainly wasn't seeking a place to hide (I mean, after all I did use my real name), I never anticipated the numbers of folks who would come by here
This blog has been a place where I've explored a lot of things. I posted some poetry, got encouragement from y'all to submit some of my thoughts to a publisher (and got published!). I've written up my thoughts on all sorts of things and received some incredibly warm feedback in response.
I initially started this place as a venue to rant about some of the down sides of contract programming. However, the gig I landed at about the same time has turned out to be one of the best I've ever had, and, as a result there really hasn't been much to complain about.
So, instead I've written about all sorts of things from my life. Things I'm pondering, people I've known, places I've gone, things I've done… and through it all, you folks have been here, and incredibly supportive.
From the bottom of my heart, thank you.
Thursday, November 10, 2005
What I don't like about some projects is that they often involve relying on another person, persons, or even a company to meet the project goals.
Why? Well, I've spent a good portion of the day chasing down and 'beating up' our D&B folks in an effort to be sure that we get this file reworked and ready by morning. I don't mind doing the follow-up, but there's a part of me that says had "I" made this kind of mistake, I would have been calling/emailing the customer, hourly if necessary, so they never had to wonder where things stood.
I did manage to knock a number of other things off my plate today though, which felt very good, as always! I could have knocked off a few more things if I hadn't had to keep chasing down the D&B folks for updates.
Enough about projects. You may remember, from my post yesterday, that I mentioned a person I haven't seen, or spoken to, in about 30 years made contact with me through the blog.
Gabbie and I were a real item, back in the day, and I was heartbroken when she told me she'd found "another guy" while I was overseas. (In all fairness to her… the last few months before I came home I wasn't exactly the verbose writer I am today… I was pretty depressed and my letters were probably pretty sparse) However, I had nothing but surprise, joy and happiness in my heart as I read her email that explained how she'd come to be looking for me.
It seems a patient of hers in the hospital, from my home town, told her years ago that I had died. He was mistaken of course and was most likely thinking of my Dad. Well, she decided to 'google' me and see if she could find out what had happened. That search brought her to the blog.
In a 'catch up' email she told me she's been married, happily, to that same "another guy" for 30 years. That they'd raised two great children, a son and daughter, and in general has had a pretty decent and happy life.
I found myself with none of that old bitterness, but instead, found a fondness for her still in my heart, and that I'm honestly glad that she's found happiness.
I suppose if I was alone, had what I thought was a miserable life and had not found some happiness of my own, I might have hung on to a bit of that bitterness, but I'd like to think not.
I've "lived" these past 30 years or so, really lived, following almost every dream I've ever had, not looking backwards, but instead always looking forward. Falling down a lot, but always getting up again, dusting myself off and starting again.
I really don't have any regrets, and to say I did, well it just wouldn't be true. She and I will probably always have a place in our hearts for one another I suppose. Young love is like that, pretty intense and the memories can last a lifetime.
With that said though, neither of us is wishing for what once was, but instead, happy we shared what we did. Discovered how to love, and be loved, unconditionally.
I don't know if I would have had that gift, to share with Maryan, had I not known Gabbie.
The other thing with young love, especially when you're separated by oceans and continents, it can get well, idealized maybe. At least there's a danger of that happening while you're apart. It's easy to idealize a person who isn't 3D, and right in front of you, if you're not careful you can find yourself in love with the 'idea' of the person, and not the person.
I don't think that happened in our case, I'm now, and always have been too rooted in reality for that. We loved the people we were then. I doubt she's the same as she was then, I know for sure I'm not!
Instead, now, I remember the good times we had, and I've all but forgotten any 'bad times' there might have been.
I believe it was Mark Twain who said "The reports of my death are greatly exaggerated" in a cable to the American press after his obituary had been mistakenly published. I'm glad to be alive, but happy also that my death was mistakenly reported.
The day ended on an up note project-wise as well. The D&B folks called right at the end of the day and said they were uploading the corrected file to their FTP site. I'm downloading it now so it'll be ready when I get to work in the morning. With any luck at all I'll have everything prepared by noon, one of the other team members can run her process tomorrow afternoon, and I can run the POL over the weekend.
If that all comes together, we'll be 100% on target come Monday morning!
As always, thanks for stopping by, and especially for leaving me your thoughts as well.
Wednesday, November 09, 2005
Strange days….
At first I thought it was just the cold I've been fighting for the past few days… but now, I'm not so sure.
It started this morning as I was checking my email, and like most folks in the business, I have a lot of things to check.
First there's the requisite update of all the filters that attempt to sift out the 100's of spam emails I get daily, while I'm nailing about 85 or 90% of them, I update the rules daily to keep it there.
After that I check the feedback forms from my websites for new contract leads, and the occasional note from an old friend who just stopped in to say hi. There it was a note from a person I knew a few years ago, but haven't been in contact with for several years.
If she hadn't left her real name in the form I would have though it was my imagination.
The next place I go is the folder for the blog comments (my favorite part of the day!) and there, and I almost missed it, is a comment from a woman I haven't heard from, or spoken to in close to 30 years. She was my lifeline while I was in the service; in fact she and I met at a party while I was home on leave after boot camp, she and I dated regularly until I got shipped overseas.
Things went south between us when I came home early, unexpectedly, though, it seems she'd found another guy and was moving on with her life, and I moved on with mine.
I've wondered over the years whatever happened to her, and now, thanks to this place I at least know she's alive, and drops in here.
If that wasn't enough strangeness for one day… I downloaded the latest data file from D&B, only to find it was totally screwed up. Again, at first I thought it had to be 'me' and the fog this cold has my brain in… but no, it was truly messed up, from the data returned to the format of the file. Something went very wrong somewhere in the D&B code stacks for sure.
Mind you this was all before 7:00am this morning.
The first two 'contacts' were strange enough… D&B, a company known for data integrity, screwing up a simple match file return was off the hook weird!!
I've got the file in rework and the team at D&B will stay on it until they get it back to us, and 100% correct, but this totally screws our early delivery schedule, and may even make us late!! Those of you who are regulars know that I hate delivering anything late, my fault or not!! Hopefully they can get everything back at some point before the close of business on Friday and I can wind up my processes and have the file ready for mainframe load first thing Monday morning.
If that happens… we have a shot at making the deadlines.
So there you have it, I'm gonna call it a day computer-wise before I create any strangeness!! I apologize to all of you for not being around your blogs the past few days, but between trying to keep this cold at bay, and not fall behind with the project I haven't had much time for visiting.
Sunday, November 06, 2005
Connections #2
Yesterday was a very interesting day for me. Most of the items I'd been sorting though were left over from the days where Greg and I were attempting to build a software business that sold its products through a dealer network.
I found, and threw away hundreds of diskettes.. yes diskettes.. 3.5" disks, 5.25" disks… several hundred at least. Master copies of all of our applications, the Foodbank manager, the Poison Control Center Tracker, Cable Tracker, the Shutter calculator, LazerPrn, and on an on.
Developmental versions, beta versions and shipping master copies, all, at one time with considerable value, today most likely worth less than the diskette they were saved on.. At several times during the day I was overwhelmed with feelings and emotions about this stuff. I thought about the endless hours I (and Ken too) spent designing, developing, testing, refining and finally declaring it all 'ready' for shipment. There were literally thousands of hours, sleepless nights, grueling schedules and many, many arguments (with Greg) about what would become the list of deliverable product features.
I started feeling sad, depressed almost, about the time, how I'd wasted so much, time, energy and money on this particular phase of my life. How I would have been better off had I never embarked on that particular path.
Then something pretty amazing happened. I began to see that part of my life for what it truly was. It was a transitional time, one where, once again I reached for the 'brass ring', got to feel my fingertips touch it, only to have it slip from my grasp as I tumbled from the carousel. It was near the end of that period, where I was running out of money, (I'd spent every dime I had attempting to keep afloat while we got these applications into production.) that I began to take contract work that involved extended travel.
It was that decision that led directly, eventually, to my being here, in North Carolina, and married to Maryan. Had I not taken the path into commercial development, I would not have gotten that first gig in Nashville (they cited my commercial development as a deciding factor in bringing me there), which lead to the projects here in North Carolina.
So, as I was emptying out closets, unpacking boxes (some of which have been moved three ort more times without ever being opened) and going through all of this 'stuff' I realized that despite feeling a little sad, I was proud of having done all of these things.
I hung on to a few trinkets… a "Have Fox.. Will Travel" brochure we drew up, a copy of our complete product listing, some certificates and old business cards, and… my first ever published article!!
I'd nearly forgotten about it, or at least dismissed the possibility I'd actually find a copy of it, so it was sort of a 'non-event' … but I came across it, and some copies of it as I was unpacking and tossing.
Nearly everything else went though. In fact, I've tossed so much stuff that we've nearly filled (say three-quarters) a commercial construction site dumpster! It's hard, even for me, to believe I had this much stuff tucked away and that by the end of the day today, we'll actually have 'storage space' again!
So, what does all of this have to do with connections? A lot really, as I remembered the connection Ken and I had then, how we worked, and developed almost as a single person. We each knew what the other was best at, and usually, we each stayed focused on those aspects we were best suited for. Our individual components often came together almost as though they'd been written by one person.
I miss those days, and wish we could find that groove again. The world has changed though, while we could, in all likelihood, still develop applications that way, the market is not what it once was.
I had a similar connection to Al DiMauro when we were painting cars, we'd discuss the project and often would work on a car, or truck, without the other there, and yet, when it was done, it was exactly what we'd planned and no one but he and I knew where his work stopped and mine began.
There's a special connection when something like that happens. I think it's much the same as the one found between folks who have served in the military together. You have a common cause, common enemy, common goal, and a complete trust in the other person.
When Tim and I rode together for those couple of years our rides were like that. Sometimes him leading the way, other times me, but always with the same end in mind. The ride, in and of itself, was the destination. Where we ended up was a far distant second to how we got there. The ride, always looking for; a new road, new challenges, new sites to see, just relaxing and enjoying the ride was the point, the only point of the ride.
I think about joining a bike club, from time to time. I never do though as I know the only reason I'd join would be to find another person to share rides like that with. Then, I realize that I'll never find another person 'like' Tim, he was, and is unique. Very different from me and from every other person I've known. Our only real bond was our love of the ride. He's also the only other person (besides my wife) who actually 'got' that, got, that riding with only the ride itself in mind was the real deal.
I'd love to be able to recreate the connection Mitch and I shared as neighbors, how we were really more like brothers than friends. I'm sad at times knowing that's very unlikely, but at the same time glad that it was that important a connection. That when we visited this past summer, the bond was still there, that we both remembered it, and missed it. Seeing Whit on that same trip evoked similar emotions.
It was shortly after that trip that I realized something important. These relationships, these connections, were not so much validations, as they were celebrations. We found commonalities to rally around that gave us an endless source of conversational material, as well as plenty 'to do' as well. Over time, each of the projects and the conversations we had in the process built a connection that has stood over decades.
While I miss each and every one of these people, the connection is still there, just being around one another again proved that.
Maybe, just maybe, we're always looking to feel connected to others, not so much to feel 'less freaky' in our interests, but to truly be able to celebrate those things we love to do!
I'm off to finish up the 'Fall Cleaning' and wrap up the outdoor wiring project. I hope you all have a great Sunday, and, as always, thanks for taking the time to stop by.
Thursday, November 03, 2005
I think the author was right, it is a strange connection. When Maryan, Tim, Donna and I were riding in the Rockies, the shift lever on Tim's bike slipped loose and neither of us had a wrench in the tool kit that would fit it.
We were in the parking lot of an old gas station that appeared to have been closed for years. His bike is stuck in 3rd gear and we were a hundred miles or so from our 'base camp' in Denver.
We'd only been sitting there for 10 minutes or so, looking at maps and debating what the 'best' direction for me to head out looking for a place to buy a wrench was, when a fellow driving a wrecker pulled into the parking lot.
He climbed down out of the wrecker, and asked if we had a problem, or were we just taking a break. We explained our situation and he immediately started going through all the various tool boxes on the wrecker looking for a wrench that would fit.
He eventually found one, with it I was able to reattach and adjust Tim's shift lever. I then took the bike for a test spin and returned. As the guy was packing things back onto his wrecker we asked what we owed him. His response was "Nothing", that he rode too, and hoped that one day, if he broke down, someone would stop and help him out.
It is a strange connection, it's pretty rare for a wrecker operator to stop and help a stranded auto driver, and then not want to get paid.
However, I think it goes far beyond motorcycling. I think we humans like to be 'bonded' to others. To find folks with common interests, who share our likes, dislikes and associate ourselves with them.
There are groups, clubs and organizations of every size, shape and style imaginable. Each has, at its core, the specific interest or desire of the members. These exist both online and out here in the real world. In the early days of 'collective computing' the service 'Compuserv' called them "SIG's" or special interest groups and they were full of folks from all over the place who had that specific 'interest' in common.
If you talk to most motorcyclists, they'll claim to be individualists (myself included). If these individualists band together, and if you've ever been to a bike rally you must have noticed how they all seem to dress alike as well, it struck me that maybe, we all like to belong to a group.
Not any group mind you, but a group that believes the same things we do.
I'm not really a "joiner", I don't belong to clubs, or groups, but I do like to be in the company of folks with similar interests.
I'm not really sure where I'm going with this line of thought, but, I do know it speaks to the universality, the commonality, we all share. While we may enjoy some amount of time alone, none of us really wants to be alone, all the time, despite how unique we believe ourselves to be.
Instead we seek out the company of others, we attend seminars, join clubs, or simply gather in chat rooms to talk with those who share a common interest, despite how individualistic we 'feel', or want to be.
I think there's some inner validation, some joy, in conversing with others who 'get' our particular interest. That there are others, who enjoy the same things we do, joins us to them somehow, and like the motorcyclist, we share our knowledge, our tricks, tips and so on, and in return listen to theirs as well.
I'll come back to this when I've thought it through a bit more.
Things have been hectic at work this week. New Duns files to prepare and match, the industry was in town this week as well and the majority of my time has been spent in meetings hashing out a spec document and gathering business rules for the match process for both the pre-production and production phases of this project.
Those of you who've ever gathered business rules will understand the difficulty of getting a company, let alone an industry to agree on common rules and procedures!!
All in all the meetings went well. We've gotten through the questions on the spec document, and answered all of the 'rules' questions and are able to move forward once again with the project.
I'm looking forward to the weekend though, the dumpster finally showed up and we'll be able to get rid of all the 'trash' that's piled up outside the garage. In addition we've decided to haul everything out of the closets, and toss anything we haven't used since we've moved in!!


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