text:
Wednesday, September 5, 2007
Look Mom! Hot Chocolate!
I know, I know, I didn't update my blog last night. I came to the conclusion that I can only go on 4 hours of sleep a night for a maximum of 2 weeks before I drop. I passed out at 11:00 last night (and wasn't even drinking!) and still had a hard time dragging my butt out of bed this morning. I know, shocking that I had a hard time getting up what with all the laundry, cleaning, cooking, and fighting to look forward to.
So, I got the oldest 4 off to school, which by the way, brought me to another conclusion. Now that my picture has been in the paper, people recognize me and it probably isn't in my best interest to drive my kids to school in my pajamas. I mean, I didn't drive my kids to school in my pajamas. I drove them in my car. But I was wearing pajamas. And no make-up. And my hair looked like this. I pulled up to the school, dropped the kids off, then quickly, but ineffectively tried to hide under my seat as a teacher walked up to my car to congratulate me on my sudden notoriety. Yep, that's not too embarrassing.
I came home from dropping the kiddos off, set my 2 little ones up with a gourmet breakfast of frozen waffles. Well, I toasted the baby's waffle, but my 3 year old literally ate his frozen. I don't know - he's a weird kid. So, I set them up and headed off to my computer to check my mail. A couple minutes later, I heard the water running full blast in the bathroom.
"What are you doing with the water? Turn it off, Clay!"
"I'm just washing my sticky hands, Mom."
"OK, do you need any help?" <--- stupid question. Of course he needs help. He's 3. He's crazy. He's in the bathroom alone. Alarms should have been going off at this point, but I was busy reading my mail. A few minutes later, he walked into my room holding a cup of steaming hot, cloudy white water. "Look Mom! I have hot chocolate!" He smiled up at me, proud as can be. "Ummm, how exactly did you make this 'hot chocolate'?" I followed him as he ran off to show me the ingredients in his hot chocolate recipe. Apparently, this particular 'hot chocolate' consisted of hot water, powdered coffee creamer, and soft soap. Mmmm, delicious, no? As I type this, it occurs to me - maybe that's why he had diarrhea this afternoon!
At this point, I took a break from my mail to clean up the half a box of cereal that was spilled on the family room floor. I let Clay know that I was not happy about this. He replied with, "But Mom, Brooklyn did it. She knocked over the box and she's only 1 so you can't be mad at her, remember?"
:::sigh::: "That's true, honey. She's only 1, but you're 3 and you know that you're not supposed to have cereal in the family room to begin with."
"It's ok Mom. I'll still eat it."
Gag. I don't think so. You guys saw what my carpet looks like. I can only imagine what hideousness lies within the fibers. Now I know there are some folks out there who keep their floors clean enough to eat off them. I'm not one of them.
OK, I got the cereal all vacuumed up. At least I like to think I got it all cleaned up, but my vacuum isn't the best in the world. I have a feeling I just crushed it into the carpet a little more. Oh well, it blends at least. Anyway, I cleaned that mess and sat back down to tackle some more mail and what do I see on the floor at my feet? A banana. An unpeeled, sliced up banana and a butter knife. What else would be on the floor of my bedroom?
I went to the library a little later in the day and some of the librarians recognized me from the article in the Tribune. At first I was a little giddy that someone recognized me and I thought it was pretty cool. Then my baby started flinging herself back in my arms screaming because she wanted me to let her down so she could run around the racks of books yelling and laughing and generally acting like a loon. And not to be outdone by his sister, my 3 year old started whining, "Can we go Mom? Mooooooom, can we go? MOOOOOM! I wanna go now! Are we gonna go now? Mom? MOM!" At this point, I stopped thinking it was cool that someone recognized me.
This afternoon, Brooklyn came into my room holding a glue stick and rubbing it all over her face, hair and neck. Perfume stick, glue stick, what's the difference. It works as hairspray too. Very powerful hairspsray.
That brings me to now. As I type, Brooklyn is throwing every article of clothing out of her drawers and onto the floor and I just don't have the energy to stop her. I guess I'll let her continue with her 'everything must go clearance sale' until she falls asleep, at which point I'll run around the house picking up clothes, papers, toys, misc. food, and a creative variety of "stuff" that covers every inch of my floor. The only time my house is clean is between 11:00 p.m. and 7:00 a.m. One day I'll be able to keep it clean during daylight hours. Right? Right?! Someone tell me that one day, my house will stay clean when the kids are awake.
195 comments:
- The Gang's All Here! said...
I can't believe I'm saying this, but after two days back to school, my house is eerily clean. Well, mostly picked up and tidy. Not clean, down to the trim and sparkling windows clean. But yes, someday you will have a tidy home for daylight hours. And you will miss the mess. Maybe not the super power hairspray mess, but the absence of GI Joes and My Little Ponies all over the floor and hanging from the bunk beds will make you sad.
- September 5, 2007 at 7:40 PM
Just another anonymous lurker here. First time leaving a comment. I just wanted to say you are seriously the brightest part of my day, and I check your site throughout the day in hopes of another post to make me smile. Thanks :-)
- September 5, 2007 at 7:42 PM
- FFamily said...
Ever the dreamer huh?
My kids are 12 and 17, theres only 2 of them, and my house still never gets "clean" unless they are gone for a weekend or sick and stuck in bed.
But hey, someday they will move out and I'll miss cleaning up after them, listening to Nirvana badly played on electric guitar, hearing that they need money for this or that, having them whine that they are HUNGRY while standing in the middle of a perfectly functional kitchen....
Or will I?
- September 5, 2007 at 7:42 PM
- maggiebsmocks said...
um, no, the floor does not stay clean when they grow up and move out.
They leave their treasures behind, in boxes, totes and tubs. These cannot go into their rooms which are perfectly arrange for the ten minute check in once a month.
besides, you have a husband, right?
- September 5, 2007 at 7:47 PM
- The LUCKY WIFE said...
I love everything you write, as I've said before... and so has everyone I guess..
BUt what was really cool is that I now found a new blogger on your list of comments one day - she sells home made jewelry and also rasies her kids, like you. her stuff is great!
If you ever have some free time, ha ha ha, take a look!
Thanks again for your kids, your blog, and my new friend in Kansas as well!
- September 5, 2007 at 7:49 PM
- Dorothy said...
Once the baby starts school, your house will stay at the same cleanliness level until the kids get home from school. If it was clean when they left, it will still be clean when they get home. If it was a mess when they left and you are gone all day, it will be a mess when you get home.
I still want a self cleaning house! One that would pick up all the barbie stuff and legos and put them back where they belong.
- September 5, 2007 at 8:00 PM
- Ole Miss Mom said...
"The days are long but the years are short!" All of our houses will stay clean one day! You're doing awesome! We'll blink and they'll be grown! Is it eternally worth it to worry about a clean house???? :-)
- September 5, 2007 at 8:02 PM
- Michelle said...
Oh how I can relate!!!
This made me laugh and also reminded me that it's not that big of a deal that my house is a wreck right now. Haha.
- September 5, 2007 at 8:05 PM
- Randee said...
Had to respond cuz I have a "frozen" frozen waffle eater here too. She is 8 and still only eats them frozen (dipped in syrup of course). She used to eat frozen fish sticks frozen too. Fellow mom's of kids who encourage lazy breakfasts unite!
- September 5, 2007 at 8:08 PM
- miriamp said...
Wait, your house is actually clean from 11pm to 7am? You're way ahead of me! (I have 8. The oldest is only 10. In school everyday, 10, 9, 8, 6. At home making a mess in the bathroom, 4, 3, 2 and 4mo. Okay, so the 4mo old isn't making the mess, she's just keeping me from stopping the others by needing to nurse or get her diaper changed, etc.)
I keep thinking I need to train the older kids to do all the jobs for me. The 10 year old is actually pretty good at laundry. Everything except folding and putting away, anyway. They all want to take over the cooking, which is somehow the last job I want to give up. Sometimes I let them make instant oatmeal. Or pancakes. Anything to get out of standing at the griddle for 2 hours so we can spend 15 seconds eating.
Anyway, keep up the good work. I need something funny to read when I'm hiding from my mom responsibilities by using the computer. I have to go help with homework now so I can actually send the oldest to bed ever.
- September 5, 2007 at 8:10 PM
- Matchbox Mom said...
Someday, you and Joe will be all alone with nothing to say to eachother, and your kids will be grown and gone. You'll be rolling in money because your book sold so many copies, it was unreal. You'll be sitting there thinking, 'I miss the kids.' At least I hope you will. You will think about the days that you had cereal ground into your carpet, and laugh to yourself. What great memories.
- September 5, 2007 at 8:12 PM
- Melissa Bissell said...
We have seven kids and YES! One day you will be able to see a clear path from one room to another. And you won't even have to step over things and/or kick them out of the way. Of course, you may not be able to see the spaces on either side of this path, but there will be one. Can't promise the same for the kid's rooms though. Mine are 18, and I still don't know what color the carpet is.
- September 5, 2007 at 8:12 PM
- thatgirl said...
What's the saying? A clean house is a sign of too much time on your hands? Something like that. My house, while not "dirty", is rarely, if ever, "clean". Clutter, always.
And I always add soft soap to my hot chocolate. Cleans the system.
- September 5, 2007 at 8:15 PM
- Charlotte said...
Uh.. I hate to tell you but your house will never really be clean. Once they grow up and get married or even if they don't marry.. the grandkids start and they're just as messy as your own kids! Take it from a gramma of 4! :)
- September 5, 2007 at 8:17 PM
- tAnYeTTa said...
tooooooo funny!!!!!
- September 5, 2007 at 8:21 PM
Just to let you know, your blog site is one of my highlights of the day. I can't work until I see what you've written!
By the way, did you know that actual studies were done regarding the connection between children's immune systems and the cleanliness of the houses in which they were raised?
It turns out that children from "spic and span, immaculately clean, floors that can be eaten off of" homes (the ones I call museum houses - don't touch anything!) had a higher rate of immune problems and respiratory disorders such as asthma?
We are doing the future generations a favor by challenging thier immune systems with a healthy (normal) amount of dust and clutter!
- September 5, 2007 at 8:23 PM
Yaaay!! I get to make one of the first comments so hopefully you'll get to see it :). I just want to add to the gazillion other comments on how amazing you are. Smart, witty, upbeat, hilarious!! I love your blog, I check it every day and treasure every single post! Wonderful, WONDERFUL job!! I'm sure the sky is the limit for you from now on... you bring so much laughter to other people's lives (including mine). I wish you the brigthest of futures because you deserve it!
Magda from Argentina (ha! That almost beats Australia, doesn't it!? LOL!)
PS: I'm sure we loyal fans will forgive you if you DON'T post daily... seriously girl, don't stress about that! Who wouldn't understand??
PS2: you looked great in the Tribune pic. And your kids are adorable.
- September 5, 2007 at 8:24 PM
- Bob said...
Dawn, I can't tell you that lie. It will never happen (house being clean while the children are there).
You've done it again with tonight's post...absolutely brilliant and hilarious, and I know from experience that every word of it is true. What I admire so much about you is your ability to see the humor and not get exasperated. In that respect you are truly an inspiration to me. Thank you!
- September 5, 2007 at 8:30 PM
Boy does that all sound familiar... Be careful with the syrup. Trust me when I say a gallon of syrup does not come out of carpet and ends up being a great place to put a floor lamp!
- September 5, 2007 at 8:38 PM
sorry to say..but no clean house...by the time they all leave the oldest will be dropping off the grandkids! :)
- September 5, 2007 at 8:42 PM
Yikes, I have a hard enough time keeping floors clean w/1 husband (the biggest mess-maker), 1 dog, 1 cat and 2 hamsters. Add 1 baby in about a month. Nope, no hope of ever seeing the floor again. Thanks for brightening my day, every day!
- September 5, 2007 at 8:43 PM
- MBKimmy said...
Um I can not lie to you ... your house will be clean when they are all off at college ... and then you will need a break due to empty nest ...
great post!
- September 5, 2007 at 8:46 PM
- allie said...
sorry, no. it won't.
unless you mean when the kids are 40 and up and have left their children at home.
- September 5, 2007 at 8:46 PM
- Amy said...
Love your blog. I can actually "beat" your pj's in the car story. At the beginning of last school year, my then 1st grader forgot his water bottle and with his apprehension of all day school, I had to take it in. Yup, I walked the halls in my jammies! His tears dried as soon as he saw mommy with the water and the super outfit!!!
- September 5, 2007 at 8:48 PM
- tommiea said...
I think my two year old and your boy are on the same wave length...she came out of the bathroom with hand soap slathered in her hair enough to remind me of a character in Grease!
- September 5, 2007 at 8:50 PM
you know, reading your blog makes me a little sad...sad because instead of ENJOYing my daughter when she was little and being a normal kid like yours, I was caught up being OCD about things like keeping the house picked up, not allowing her to have chocolate, getting upset (I mean UPSET!) when she accidentally made a mess...today, at 17, well, she's like I was...she gets upset (I mean UPSET) when her world isn't perfectly ordered (and we all know, the reality of it is, life is NOT perfectly ordered).
Dawn, I am so thankful that there are really moms out there like you (and I know a mom of 5 who is & and she works outside the house!) who take the time to photograph everything, write about it and let others see the wonderful, beautiful, sweet and fantastic kids kids you have (her oldest just went off for his first year at TX A&M in the Corp of Cadets - Gig 'Em!). You are doing such a great job. Keep it up...maybe other moms out there will learn before it's too late that kids don't stay little for long, every moment is precious - even the ones that drive you to INSANITY and back, and you'd better enjoy every moment NOW 'cuz the material things - they don't matter a darn. Family does, and kids do, and that is the real meaning of life...not how clean the house is, how perfectly they behave in public or how impressed everyone else is with those things. You're teaching them the really important things…
…and you know, now that I think about it, Spaz might be able to sell that "hot chocolate" recipe to those folks who need a little "something" to get things "moving"…
S in TX
- September 5, 2007 at 8:51 PM
- Angie said...
I'm so glad to see you're back! I'm spreading the word about your blog everywhere!
I was just about to start my blog for the night about the mess in my house, and then I read yours. You and all of the other commenters make me feel better for having a messy house. I wish I wish for a housewife. If I had a housewife, I'd life in LaLaLand.
Keep up the good work!
- September 5, 2007 at 9:05 PM
- sonja said...
Aww, hon, my mom used to take me to school in her nightgown, I just told people that was her evening gown and she believed in being formal at all hours of the day.
- September 5, 2007 at 9:10 PM
This is my first comment. I am a nanny to twin 2 year olds and a 4 year old. Whenever I think I've had a hard day, I just read your blog and feel better. ;) you are AMAZING!
- September 5, 2007 at 9:11 PM
- Manic Mom said...
I am that someone who will tell you that one day your house will stay clean when the kids are awake... I promise you, this will eventually happen. Your kids WILL BE AWAKE and YOUR HOUSE WILL STAY CLEAN...
However, it won't happen until for another 17 years when Baby Brooklyn kisses you goodbye along with the others when she heads off to college...
Wahhhhh! Got me tearing up at the thought of MY HOUSE BEING CLEAN SOMEDAY...
I think it'll suck to have a clean house, because a clean house is a lonely house.
Enjoy the mess your children bring into your life!
Peace UP!
- September 5, 2007 at 9:12 PM
- SteamyDreamer said...
Still waiting on the clean house. I really believe that unless you live by yourself you will always have a messy lived in look. Dust bunnies say I do when you do and won't go until you are alone. Then they are bored and leave or so I have been told.
- September 5, 2007 at 9:13 PM
- Brian, Kim, Brian and Sean said...
I got an e-mail about your e-bay listing and posted it on a bulletin board. What a surprise when I found out one of the girls I post with is married to a guy you went ot school with! What a small world! I love reading your posts - with three boys of my own -so many of them ring true for me!
- September 5, 2007 at 9:17 PM
- :o) mg said...
My mom swears I will miss this. "You'll grow tired of hearing the clocks tick," she'll say forebodingly.
I'm so sure!
Can't wait to prove her right!
- September 5, 2007 at 9:20 PM
- Melody said...
nothing wrong with frozen waffles my friend. they are the staple of morning breakfast for my 9yr old.. along with frozen sausages zapped in the micro. they make our world go round don't they!?
- September 5, 2007 at 9:23 PM
And I hate to burst everyone's bubble but I used to think it was the kids who made the messes but after my DH passed away and my kids were gone my house was still a mess. Maybe it was cuz I had TRAINED myself to ignore messes so I didn't notice UNTIL I had been to someone else's home that was tidy. THEN I'd come home and go on a cleaning frenzy only to discover that I had just moved piles from one place to another.
I live in town now for the last 2 years and at first my house was tidy but I've got "PILES" in the basement again... Working on those... I now know where the word hemmorhoid became PILES... because PILES of stuff really are a pain in the rear
Louise from Alberta, Canada
- September 5, 2007 at 9:26 PM
neither does crisco oil. my youngest opened and dumped a whole bottle on our kitchen floor the first week we were in it. wouldn't have been bad had it not been berber! and it didn't come out so we had this huge ugly stain in the middle of the kitchen until we put in a new floor. however, the day after the incident we installed magnetic locks :)
- September 5, 2007 at 9:27 PM
- The Rocking Pony said...
Yes, the house will be clean when all the kids are in school. But only when they're physically there.
Our house still have the whirling dervish living in it who not only empties dresser drawers but dirty laundry hampers. And the clothes intermix so who's to know if the kids are wearing clean underwear to school or not?
- September 5, 2007 at 9:29 PM
- LilyLakeMom said...
I am so glad to have found your blog...thanks for making me laugh!
No clean house around here, and I only have 4!
And there is nothing wrong with having hair like Gilda, I think I look pretty good at the bus stop like that.
I'm kidding...actually I look more like Jennifer Garner every single day.
- September 5, 2007 at 9:30 PM
- Mom*2*5*princesses*&*2*peapod*girls said...
Are you sure that you aren't invisible living at my house? Geez, other than the fact that I don't have any boys...all 5 of mine are girls....it sounds pretty much the same. The babies were cranky b/c they got shots today, the 4 1/2 year old is whiny b/c she's had a big day and needed to be in bed an hour ago...the other 2, well, they just procrastinate at everything I say and tell them to do. If by some miracle I get to bed before midnight, I will thank the sleep lords for their mercy! My house is the same, clean only between around 11 and 6:30(ish) in the morning. Then, it starts all over again...AND to top it off, I get the constant reminder from my CLEANFREAK Mother that my house is a disaster! UGH! I need a vacation!
- September 5, 2007 at 9:33 PM
- AmandaMcGregor74 said...
Of course it will be clean in daylight hours, sometime, ... they will all be in school eventually, as long as numner 7 or 8 or ... doesn't arrive before then!
- September 5, 2007 at 9:38 PM
Hi Dawn,
Love your blog! I have been visiting every day since I was sent the link of your eBay listing! LOL! Love the pics of u and your kids...they are SO cute! I am so happy you are getting recognition for your writing, and I look forward to reading your book when it comes out!
You mention in today's blog that your "vacuum doesn't work that great". Well, this week at Target they have Dysons on sale (best vacuum ever!) and there is a pink one that some of the purchase price goes towards Breast Cancer Research. I don't work for Target or Dyson...just really like my Dyson vacuum, and I like to pass along a good deal when I see it. :-) Just an FYI, I guess.
Take care!
Melinda in Wisconsin
- September 5, 2007 at 9:40 PM
My daughter showed me you ebay addy- I laughed so hard I cut and pasted it and sent it on to my friends. Now reading a daughter in laws blog I find you have a blog. I'll be checking in regularly to see what your up to. I had five kids and most are gone now. The house is still not clean, hubby is home all day and makes a bigger mess than the kids. :-s Keep up the good work!
Annie Mouse Lee
- September 5, 2007 at 9:43 PM
- Christine said...
hey at least you can keep your house clean at night. I've gone to bed with the house clean, (ok that rarely happens but it HAS happened once or twice) and by the time I get up in the morning there were chewed up ribs left over from supper on the counter. I was the last one in bed and the first one up so I have NO idea who decided it was a good idea to get out of bed in the middle of the night and pull a cold rib out of the fridge and chew all the meat off and then throw the bone on the counter. Like why the hell could it not go in the garbage?? I don't know, maybe someone sleep eats in my house. *gasp* maybe it's me?? Maybe THAT'S why I can't lose any weight?? LOL
- September 5, 2007 at 9:43 PM
I love your blog. It's my new favorite spot on the web. It's so nice to have someone with which to relate. I have only one child and somehow my house always manages to be a disaster as well. I don't know how you stay sane with six (though I want four so what am I talking about?)
Anyway, after a day at home with Daddy to watch her while I work in my home "office", I always find the contents of drawers emptied, papers pulled out of folders and strewn on the floor, you know the drill.
Today I came upstairs to find that she had colored her dolly Emma's head with her crayons. She had also managed to get her hands on a tube of Carmex chapstick which she proceeded to rub all over herself and her dollies. All of which my husband did nothing to stop. Brilliant.
- September 5, 2007 at 9:53 PM
I saw your ebay auction when it was first put up, but the link to your blog never worked for me. Tonight I stumbled randomly across your blog and... well, let's just say I found another site to add to my favorites! Thanks for the laughs!
Melissa :)
- September 5, 2007 at 9:54 PM
- Suzanne said...
Yeah, mine eats frozen peas. I don't complain. She's eating a vegetable.
And bubble stuff can cause diarrhea, too!
- September 5, 2007 at 9:57 PM
I have five kids - blessed choas! Except in my house, I'm the one who eats the waffles frozen! You can tell how many brain cells I have left when I think they taste better than toasted! Espresso shot, anyone?
- September 5, 2007 at 9:58 PM
- ComfyDenim said...
Are you sure you weren't looking at my house when you typed this? I don't think my kids know how to use hangers and I'm pretty sure we've had "hanger" training around here.
I'm sure one day your house will be clean. Just like mine will. Our houses in heaven will be pretty clean as I imagine HEaven to be clutterless. *L*
It's nice to know that you're normal. Or at least normal like me. Whatever that is.
- September 5, 2007 at 10:22 PM
- chelemom said...
I only have two children and my house is only clean...well sort of clean...in the wee hours of the night! You seriously put a smile on my face every day!
- September 5, 2007 at 10:22 PM
Hey I have read ebay and loved it now I of course look forward to reading your blog. You are at the top of my favorites list. I check it daily. I do agree with all the others the way you right sucks you in and you can just picture what is going on there. As a mother of 2 boys myself 1yr and 3yr and I run a licensed daycare home. I know what your going threw especially keeping your house CLEAN and caught up on Laundry not even going to mention having to live out of laundry baskits being to tierd to put it all up. Your great keep up the good work and just know were right there with you and nothing in this world is better than being a MOM!
God Bless you and your family
Decatur, IL
- September 5, 2007 at 10:25 PM
I only have a 9 month old, and I spend every night cleaning after he goes to bed. I don't think I could handle your brood but it sure makes me laugh to hear you tell about it.
- September 5, 2007 at 10:26 PM
- tammy b said...
you, i believe, are my long-lost-twin-sister-from-another-mother. gluestick notwithstanding, one of my girls also enjoys a nutritious and frozen stiff waffle.
- September 5, 2007 at 10:35 PM
You could be trying to sell your house, like me, with three kids who are unmotivated to maintain some degree of order. Talk about nerve wracking.
- September 5, 2007 at 10:37 PM
okay, let's define clean...is it stuff off the floor and piled up on the nearest piece of furniture? or maybe stuff behind a closed door? or even better, on the floor in piles which you know what they are but no one else does? As the mother of four, which all are finally in school, all day I might add, your house will never be clean. Life isn't suppose to be about cleaning. Cherish the moments. Take care!
- September 5, 2007 at 10:38 PM
I just wanted to say I love your blog! It is so funny and true. I only have two kids, 4 and 2 and I can't keep on top of my housework. I just keep repeating my favorite quote, "A clean house is a sign of a wasted life." Can't remember who said it but I feel it has some truth to it because when my house is clean and for it to stay that way I have to ignore my kids. I would rather spend time with them. You are doing a great job!
- September 5, 2007 at 10:51 PM
- Diane Perin Hock said...
Heck, as long as Brooklyn is covered with glue, why not just roll her around the floor? Bet she'll pick up a lot of crumbs that way....
- September 5, 2007 at 10:53 PM
Your day sounds so much like my day. My 3 yr old use to think that glue sticks were chapstick. She was always trying to put it on her lips. Today she wanted to use it the right way, only she wanted to glue a picture she drew to her bed. I'm begining to feel normal.
- September 5, 2007 at 10:59 PM
- **"Liza"** said...
Ohh my your post is just like my life hahaha..I have 2 boys same ages as your 3 and 1..Im totally digging your post, 100% can relate to it.I bet your carpet looks like my carpet in my house..I dont really clean in the morning my self, I do it at night its better that way because the kids are in Lala Land "sleeping"..
- September 5, 2007 at 11:02 PM
- My Flock Rocks! said...
you are sooooo me (without kids) Luv Ya, Luv Your blog...Psssst...go pink~
- September 5, 2007 at 11:03 PM
- Christine said...
I had the same problem until I sent my youngest off to Kindergarden. Now the house has the ability of staying clean bewteen 8:00 and 12:00. That is if I want to spend that precious time cleaning it!
- September 5, 2007 at 11:04 PM
I read this
(just copy and past that address to your web browser) and felt ill. Maybe she just has a very dry sense of humor and is in reality a loving, good mother like you (I hope so, her poor kids)
- September 5, 2007 at 11:04 PM
I have 3 kids-7, nearly 3 and 1 1/2... so I know just what you are talking about with the dirty house. I also watch my 2 year old cousin who makes more messes than my 3 combined! We had my mil watch the kids on Sunday so we could clean all day, and only managed to get the enormous pile of laundry that collected when the washer broke washed and half the living room cleaned! I too look forward to the day when I can clean one room, move on to another, and come back to the first to find it still clean... Guess I have a few years left!
As to your 3 year old liking frozen waffles-my nearly 3 year old son is the same way. He loves frozen waffles, chicken nuggets and french fries, and also prefers his hot dogs right from the fridge-no boiling required! It grosses me out a little, but it also makes it really easy to feed him sometimes! I'm just glad he is eating at all, he's a bit picky.
Well, I'll let you get on to your next comment now...
- September 5, 2007 at 11:15 PM
- Kristina said...
Ahhh yes the 'lived in'carpet look! I call mine the spotted puppy carpet. It has so many spots from god knows what that I have stopped trying to remove them!Gotta love it!
- September 5, 2007 at 11:20 PM
I know you'll find this hard to believe but you will have a normal life when they older, perhaps one day even visit coffee shops like I do. I also have 6 kids, but my oldest just turned 17 and can actually double as a poorly paid nanny at times.
I've put in a coffee shop plan for you to use in a few years:
First, you call the 17 year old aside and ask her if she wants to go have a coffee, she'll look at you with disbelief and excitement and naturally accept your offer. Then while she does her hair for the 87th time you quickly load the other five into the car, making sure not to forget the 1year olds dummy (pacifier in your land). You pretend to be on the mobile (cell phone – I know as I watch CSI Miami) as she gets into the car, so she cannot tell you she's not coming if they're all coming, and then you hot foot it to the shopping centre.
On arriving you go the grocery shop and buy $50 worth of Mars bars, donuts and choc milk as quickly as possible (this means you wait at the confectionary free checkout while your oldest two offspring sprint through the shops like they've won a 'spend all you can in five minutes' competition).
After spending the day's groceries on chocolate you head to the coffee shop with the two babies in their prams. Once there you place the 17 year old at a nice table with a high chair. She will look at you and say 'I don't really want to sit with him (him being the one year old who'll soon be smeared from head to toe in Mars bar). At this time you fix her with your sternest look and whisper 'if you want to wear my new jeans to the party this weekend you will keep him with you'. It also helps if you slip her a ten dollar note.
You find another table and seat the 11, 12 and 14 year old, emptying most of the newly acquired grocery items onto the table before you go. Then you find a place at least two tables away, where you and the three year old sit, unfortunately, she must stay with you due to her newly learned habit at pointing at fat people and men with beards.
The waitress will serve you very quickly and you'll have no problem catching her eye when you need anything, like a sponge, mop or double shot coffee.
After about 15 minutes when the food is all gone, then you know its time to go.
Hope this helps, as this is how we do it in Australia.
- September 5, 2007 at 11:29 PM
- ashley nicole said...
Yays for people recognizing you!!
Don't feel so bad about taking the kids to school in your pajamas...my mom used to do it all the time. I don't think anyone in my family is a morning person.
Have a great day!!
- September 5, 2007 at 11:29 PM
- VanDerHoekArt said...
I've often asked that same question to moms with older kids. They give me the same response when I ask if I'll have some "free time" when my son starts school....muah ha ha ha ha haha ha ha ha!
- September 5, 2007 at 11:42 PM
- Cracker Jackie said...
I promise you one day your house will stay clean. Enjoy the crumbs and the sticky furniture,you will miss it. :)
See my ebay auctions for bowl covers, just like Saran used to make!
- September 5, 2007 at 11:45 PM
- Katirocks said...
A clean house is severely OVERRATED!! You'll have plenty of time to have a clean house later...I'm really trying to make myself feel better too!!
I used to be the OCD girl with scrubbed baseboards, bleached floors, insanely organized closets & cupboards. Kid #3 threw me for a loop, now I'm happy to run a vacuum over the place. It's totally normal. It's a little trick of nature; cuz it's NEVER over or done. Once you're done cleaning or washing laundry it's time to start over again!!
Love your blog!! - Kate
- September 5, 2007 at 11:56 PM
- plainprecious said...
ummmmm about your theory as far as keeping your house clean during daylight hours. Hmmmmm mayb once Brooklyn is out of the house. My kids are 19 Pete 17 Kadie 14 Luke 4 Noah and 3 Sawyer. I think its toss up as far as who is messier. My older ones who KNOW better are still PIGS LOL. Look at their rooms and you would wonder why the athourities havent taken them from my house. Dirty socks, empty pop cans cereal boxes empty Spaghetti Os cans and the list goes on and on. I wonder at times what made me start this all over. Oh yea divorce and remarriage and that Oh baby I love you so much lets have a baby. Then when that baby is born I said well we cant have just one he'll grow up like an only child. Love is the a powerful drug it blocks your senses!!!! LOL Actually I love my kids especially when they are asleep. Problem is they never all sleep at the same time. This leaves Momma like you totally overworked and literally unpaid. I like you, find myself staying up WAY too late then getting up way too early just trying to get things done and like you it never stays done!!!Plus the fact that it never ceases to amaze me the things that my youngest think about getting into. The other day my husband was sitting in the tub my youngest went in and was having a lovely conversation with his daddy. All of a sudden I hear my hubby holler Dear!!!! What is red all over Sawyers feet? I go in and there my baby is with a foot in the air looking like he had just gone through the scene of a massacre I go through the house to investigate? I dont see anything out of the norm though I cant see the floors because of the clean clothes that were once folded neatly on the couch and all over the floor then I lift my own foot up to discover my feet are red too. hmmmmmmmmm then I spy it the empty Kool aid packets. Yep all over the floor. All over the 3 loads of once clean clothes. I go back into bathroom and show my husband my evidence then my hubby sweet hubby says Dear you really need to put this kind of stuff up higher. I reply we have no more space up HIGH!!!!! Ahhhhhh hubby's gotta love em? We do have to love them right? Mommies UNITE Hugs Elisabeth
- September 5, 2007 at 11:58 PM
Two great t-shirts for your 3 year old: One say, "I'm definitely up to something." and another one says, "I do all my stunts". My 4 older kids found their 4 year old little brother the first t-shirt listed at Target. I'll see if I can find you one for your little stuntman!
--Lisa K
- September 6, 2007 at 12:13 AM
- Dawn said...
I homeschool-so my house always looks the way you describe during the day-but I had to laugh-it is much cleaner from 11pm -7am too! Like anyone is going to stop by and say hello and see the clean floor in the middle of the night. My husband says I should just leave the mess so if any burglars break in during the night, we'll either hear them because they stepped on one of our thousand blinking singing toys, or they'll kill themselves from tripping on them!
Dawn (I love your name)~You are very gifted! Thanks for sharing your experiences. So many can relate, but don't have the talents that you do of putting your thoughts into coherant writings.
- September 6, 2007 at 12:34 AM
I have 5 still at home, 3 being teenagers and will tell you, the clean from 11pm to 7 am doesn't even last. Once they hit the age of staying up late; forget it.
Had to laugh at the glue stick. My 3 year old got hold of the bottle of glue(while I was reading emails) and put glue in his brother's hands and hair while he slept! What a mess the next morning when we discovered it!!
- September 6, 2007 at 12:35 AM
The first week of school, I would "get ready" before taking my daughter to school--clothes, contacts, brushed teeth, a little hair and make-up. Now it's seriously pj's, glasses, and morning breath!
- September 6, 2007 at 12:53 AM
- Kim said...
As I was reading tonight, I realized that I visit your blog not just because you write so well but also because your blog holds for me a fascination similar to that of a train wreck about to occur. By the way, here's a tip: Just sleep in your clothes. It will save all sorts of time and embarrassment. Alternatively, you know the "pajama" look is reasonably popular now. About a year ago, a friend and I stopped at a fast food restaurant around 2 p.m. on a Saturday and saw no less than three girls wearing their pajamas. And remember: You're famous now; you can set trends. You can engage in outrageous behavior. You can check in and out of rehab--just in case you need a little vacation.
- September 6, 2007 at 1:07 AM
- Hayley said...
Just realised I left signed in anon before. I left the comment about coffee shops, its on my site if you need any more mummy wisdom (I'm sure you don't)
- September 6, 2007 at 2:13 AM
- Becky said...
What is that saying? "Cleaning with children growing is like shoveling while it's still snowing."
LOL...It's a whole lot easier to just post a disclaimer on the front door, "Martha Stewart does NOT live here!" and let folks draw their own conclusions.
There will be plenty of time for a clean house after the kids are all in school.
Love your blog, Dawn. God bless you and your family!
- September 6, 2007 at 2:36 AM
i want you to know that my mom sent me your ebay auction listing to read and i laughed alot. and i don't laugh often. i only have 2 kids and i'm 23 - you probably think that's young, but boy do i feel OLD!!! you're blog comforts me imensely. i suffer from postpartum, and anything that makes me laugh is a good thing. thanks for giving me something to look forward to - even on the crappiest of days.
- September 6, 2007 at 4:58 AM
- Robin Desko said...
Have to agree with most of the other posters...with only 3 children, it is very rare that the house is not overrun with stuff from one end of the house to the other. I don't know why we bother with closets, cabinets or dressers.
Love your blog - seriously a great way to start the day!
- September 6, 2007 at 5:20 AM
- Kim said...
It will be clean one day...but not until they have all gone to school. And then it's only clean between the hours of 8am and 4pm.
- September 6, 2007 at 5:31 AM
- Sara said...
Cleaning up the constant trail of stuff has only exacerbated my OCD tendencies! I'll follow the 1 year old around, picking up the discarded doll, toy, leaky sippy cup, toothbrush...only to double-back through the house and find the 3 year old has unrolled the entire (new!) roll of TP, stripped the house plant of it's north-facing leaves, and taken a hunk right out of the center of the cooling loaf of bread on the countertop. Sigh...a clean house is in our future, but would that be really as much fun?!
- September 6, 2007 at 5:37 AM
- Dani S. said...
Love your blog Dawn. There are so many people cheering for you! I know it may sound odd, since I don't really know you, but I'm so proud of you. You're one of us and you've broken the ranks! Can't wait for the book.
By the way, I'm sure you have a routine or something slightly resembling a routine, but I really found www.flylady.com helped me out with the house cleaning. If you haven't heard about her, you should really check out her website. She's another awesome lady!
- September 6, 2007 at 6:05 AM
Like delighted mom of 5, I like frozen waffles better than the toasted ones, and I'm 35 :-)
- September 6, 2007 at 6:25 AM
- tales_from_the_crib said...
at least it should comfort you that you're known for being the mom with lots of kids who get into harmless mischeif...so at least you lived upto your hype...lots of people don't...
- September 6, 2007 at 6:31 AM
- Hawkins family said...
I have 4 kids, all 8 and under. My new motto..."If you'd like to come over and see me, you can come over any time! If you'd like to come over and see my house, YOU HAVE TO MAKE AN APPOINTMENT!"
- September 6, 2007 at 6:40 AM
- i_am_4given said...
The only time my house is clean is when my kids are in school. And once it is all clean I look around, very proud of myself, may I add, and sit down and drink a coffee. But once one of my children, or husband for that matter, comes home, my beautiful clean home is no more!! But I did have that fleeting moment when I do remember it clean!!
- September 6, 2007 at 6:56 AM
Yes, your house will be clean one day while the kids are awake. However, they will be 25 and over and all out of the house.
I only have two, 8 and 5.5 and I've come to the conclusion that a clean house is an effort in futility.
Love your blog-missed you yesterday but I certainly can't blame you for taking a break!
- September 6, 2007 at 7:04 AM
- Cindy said...
Indeed, one day the house will be clean, the kids will be grown and gone, and you'll be wishing for those messy days back again. Hard to believe, but true none-the-less. Hang in there, Dawn!
- September 6, 2007 at 7:19 AM
- mkuntz said...
I just wanted to let you know that yes, one day your house will be clean. My mother-in-law (who raised 8) has a very tidy house and I'm always saying how jealous I am at which point she tells me that there were many years that she couldn't keep anything in place. I think she almost misses those times a bit because she seems to become a bit nostalgic when talking about it. I gotta' love that woman!
- September 6, 2007 at 7:23 AM
- Deanna said...
Too Funny! I know,not right now, but someday as you go and read this again, you'll giggle. That is, if you're not in a 'home' by then.lol
Thanks for the laugh! Even though it was at your expense.
Have a great day!
- September 6, 2007 at 7:26 AM
- Lisa C. said...
My house never gets clean, even though all 4 of mine are in school I still have the two furry babies at home and one of them is a shepard/husky mix, and she leaves hair EVERYWHERE, even after I FURminate her..lol. Oh well, my life would be so boring if not for the 4 kids, 2 dogs, 1 rabbit and of course the wonderful husband..lol
- September 6, 2007 at 7:27 AM
- Bulldogma said...
First I want to thank you VERY much for putting the link to my Down Syndrome Project on your Blog page! I wish I could give you a big hug... honestly I wish I could give ANYONE a big hug, but you know how hard that is with a one-year-old on your hip and a 3 or 4-year-old taking a ride on your leg :-)
I hear you about the carpet thing! We finally replaced our carpet of many colors and odors two weeks ago... with laminate flooring. It looks like wood, only it's indestructible! With 3 kids, 3 dogs and a cat with a permanent leak, it was only a matter of time!
More Kudos to you, and get some sleep!
- September 6, 2007 at 7:28 AM
A clean house ...what's that???
It's impossible with kids at any age. I love your lightheartedness. One day when the kids are grown we'll miss the chaos & messiness..right??
- September 6, 2007 at 7:31 AM
- Michelle said...
Here is the direct link to the podcast:
- September 6, 2007 at 7:40 AM
- Monnik said...
I'm sure you've heard this before, but my Grandma always used to say it to me, and I have a plaque of it on my wall:
Cleaning and scrubbing can wait till tomorrow, for babies grow up, we've learned to our sorrow.
So quiet down cobwebs, dust go to sleep. I'm rocking my baby and babies don't keep.
- September 6, 2007 at 7:57 AM
I Love reading your stuff, makes me glad to only have 4 kids and one at home while the rest are in school!! Although at least I have a little help as my older ones are 16 and 13. The 16 year old just got a job though, I think to get out of helping mom with the younger ones. Anyway, great "stories" It is the best part of my day to read these, gives me a good laugh. The pokemon ebay thing had me rolling on the flooor in tears!!
- September 6, 2007 at 8:01 AM
My house will never be clean until my kids move out. We have two boys, and another baby on the way, a dog, cat, and a 1000 square foot house. On top of all that, we homeschool.....can you say crazy?
- September 6, 2007 at 8:01 AM
Your comment about your poor vacuum cleaner brought back memories of the miserable vacuum I inherited when I married my hubby. It threw so much dirt back into the air that I had an asthma attack every time I used it and I don't even have asthma! When it started spewing fumes that smelled like a tire factory I did some research and found I wanted a Dyson. I paid an enormous amount of money for it, (a fact I have never mentioned to my husband). It really sucks!! It's amazing. Anyway, I wanted to buy you a Dyson, but realized that I can't use Kinzcash (from Webkinz World) to purchase it. They don't even sell vacuum cleaners in the "W Shop anyway. Anyway, I hope someone buys you one someday.
Love your blog and I'm thrilled for your newfound fame/talent/future in writing.
- September 6, 2007 at 8:01 AM
Dawn - I think of you all the time now, you'd have so much material at my home. For instance when my 3yo (also named Spaz) came out of the shower onto our deck and proceeded to pee on my leg as I was on the phone ordering a pizza. As this occurred it forced me to utter a word that made Pizza Hut think it was an obscene phone call. Love your blog. I'm a huge supporter from PA!
- September 6, 2007 at 8:29 AM
Sweetie, in myexperience... The house will not be clean and STAY CLEAN until the kids are all off to college. SORRY, LOL!! And then it will be you hubby you are picking up behind because he will feel he has to give you something to do now that the kids are gone. I have two younger brothers that are 26 and 21. The youngest of the two is still living with my parents and he still makes a mess and dosn't pick up after himself. KIDS!! GOTTA LOVE 'EM!!
Hope your day goes a little better without more of the "HOT CHOCOLATE"!
Loretta S.
- September 6, 2007 at 8:29 AM
- Bernadette said...
I missed you yesterday!! :-) I was so happy to see that you had posted something and was even more delighted when I began reading it. I laugh at your posts. You really make us other moms feel like we are not alone. I had a vistor come over to my house yesterday and that doesn't happen very often. I had my oldest daughter throw all the unfolded laundry on my bed and clean up just the living room because I knew our visitor would not be going anywere else :-) The clothes went back on the couch after she left. This morning was a wash and go day for me - I washed my hair and went. I didn't have time to get us all ready AND fix my hair for work. I'm just going to try and hide from everyone today :-)
- September 6, 2007 at 8:42 AM
- Mich said...
OK, 4 kids in school and the little ones still wreaked havoc. Yep, I guess that's what I have to look forward to when I quit work to stay home with my two little girls.
You know what I love about you? You're REAL! OK, you've probably heard that a million times, but that's what I like. You're real, you're not trying to be "super mom" or pretending to be. You say it like it is and take it all in stride. I think I need to adopt your sense of humor just to get through everyday life!
- September 6, 2007 at 8:51 AM
I have been reading and laughing at your life as it parallels mine! Six kids here too, 4 in school and 2 at home... the other day someone made that lovely statement about blinking and they will all be gone... all day, I kept blinking... nope... they were all still here!!!
Thinking of sending you my stories to add to your collection... apples in the toilet trap, which nail polish matches the decor in mom's room best, and how to remove, oil, nail polish, lip stick, and ink from the most noticable places...just to name a few!
Thanks for making this journey called motherhood more bareable!!
Mom in Indiana
- September 6, 2007 at 8:52 AM
- Mrs. Dr. Dave said...
I've got a stepson who is 10 that likes to eat frozen waffles too.....weird!
- September 6, 2007 at 8:57 AM
- morninglight mama said...
my god, you're freaking me out! my son also LOVES frozen waffles-- untoasted-uncooked-straight-from-the-freezer-frozen-waffles. makes it nice on a saturday morning that he can get up and feed himself all on his own-- gotta love the bottom freezer! :)
- September 6, 2007 at 9:05 AM
Our home is far from clean, but we eat off the floor regularly to keep our immune systems strong. Those preschool germs are TOUGH, so we need all the help we can get! Ha ha.
You are one hilarious woman. Thanks for taking time in your day to share. It makes life with three little ones seem easy (almost). Please go get some rest. You're sounding a bit zany today. :-) Been there!
- September 6, 2007 at 9:05 AM
Been there, done that. Would like to see into your future? I just was sent a link to your pokemon cards on ebay. Hilarious! My most outstanding memory of the grocery store adventures would be (1) when my son pulled an entire case of grape jelly off the top of a stack. (It's hard to quickly move away looking nonchalant while leaving purple buggy tracks) (2) When the only deal I could make to get my 3rd child out of the toy aisle was to buy him the toy handcuffs ONLY if I could cuff him to my buggy. (He happily tagged along, cuffed to the side of my buggy for the rest of my shopping, which brought some funny looks, but worked for me) (3) When my daughter and her friend (yes, four wasn't enough, I had to borrow more kids to take with me) were practicing their cheerleading flips down the aisle and lost a shoe on the top of an aisle. We had to call in reinforcements (stockboys) for that one. Oh, and lest I forget, the dropped two liter of Coke on the parking lot which took off like a rocket, spewing a fine mist of Coke on everything it passed by, zigging and zagging while every stared, until it finally ran out of fuel. (That one could have been me, but with four kids, you just point to one and everyone knows they did it)
Love your blog, but have bad news. As they get older, the hours they are awake increase, therefore, your house will not stay clean until they're moved out. You think groceries are expensive now? Wait until you are feeding your six, plus several friends, twenty-four hours a day, not just twelve. And sleep? What is that? Good luck. If you ever run out of stories, let me know. I have tons, lol.
- September 6, 2007 at 9:09 AM
- Dawn said...
Okay now I have older kids, 17 years old and 9 years old and my house is still not clean! So don't let anyone fool that once the kids get older your house will stay clean! That is a total lie!LoL I love your blog! Keep smiling and blogging!
- September 6, 2007 at 9:12 AM
- Busy Mom said...
I cannot tell a lie. It will never stay clean.
Something about Sisypheus and the stone.
- September 6, 2007 at 9:38 AM
I love reading your blog because it tells me I'm not the only one! I'm so tired of reading this FlyLady crap about how easy it is to keep your house clean. I don't understand how you CAN do it when my kids can trash it faster than I can clean it. I think there's a law of physics at play here that makes mess inevitable!
- September 6, 2007 at 10:04 AM
- Cinna said...
Hi Dawn!
I´m one of those who reads your blog- but doesn´t comment that much....
Anyway - I made you a Rockin´Girl Blog on my blog. Feel free to come over and see!
Take care!
- September 6, 2007 at 10:33 AM
I love your blog! I have had a few times i have been trying not to laugh my fool head off while at work! As far as the house goes the kids will remeber the times with mom not if the house was clean or not. One of my fave sayings is
"a spotless house is the sign of a wasted life" enjoy everything even the messy house.
Mom of 2
- September 6, 2007 at 10:36 AM
- Sherri H said...
I was forwarded your e-bay post and that is how I found your blog. I must say, as the mother of 2 (girl 13, boy 12)I laugh out loud at your stories. So many times I think, been there, done that! You have such a way of putting the daily mundane into a light that everyone can relate to. I have bookmarked your blog just so I can get a dialy laugh (no pressure! LoL)
- September 6, 2007 at 10:37 AM
- mommybootcamp said...
I have 2 little people & just joined this blogger world.. I would love to know how you do it & where you get the energy to go on EVERYDAY!!! I look forward to reading your new post everyday THANK YOU !!!
- September 6, 2007 at 10:46 AM
- Michelle said...
Smart move adding the copyright notice to the blog. Once bitten, twice shy (damn ebay plagiarizer).
You should consider posting that there will be no post over the weekend and take some time to rest. You must need it by now.
- September 6, 2007 at 10:49 AM
- sue said...
Thanks for posting the radio station link. I live in the Des Moines area and was so disappointed I missed it 'live'... will go check it out.
- September 6, 2007 at 11:17 AM
- Heather said...
Congratulations on another day of insanity. I'm right there with you, my friend.
- September 6, 2007 at 11:51 AM
- Chris said...
Absolutely love this post! Enjoy! Chris
- September 6, 2007 at 11:51 AM
Your writing is hilarious. A friend and I are launching a new entertainment website for moms and would love to speak with you. You can contact me at email@example.com. Keep blogging!
- September 6, 2007 at 11:52 AM
- Susania said...
Hey Dawn, maybe after you get the book/movie/tv deal, you can HIRE A HOUSEKEEPER! Or, at least someone to help you clean once a week... wouldn't that be lovely?
Or, at least, send all the darlings to a nice boarding school. In Switzerland.
- September 6, 2007 at 12:10 PM
- Karen said...
:) FlyLady
- September 6, 2007 at 12:17 PM
- healthymomof2 said...
My 3 year old like frozen waffles too! I think its because when she was teething I would give them too her to soothe the swollen gums.
Glad to know there are other weird kids out there like mine!
- September 6, 2007 at 12:17 PM
- Stephanie said...
My three year old prefers his waffles frozen as well. Yummy.
- September 6, 2007 at 12:35 PM
I have 4 kids, 4,2,1,11mos and one on the way in December. I have days where I feel that I am part of a bad movie that just won't end. Your grocery trip story gave me the best laugh I've had in a while - it's great to know that I am not the only one.....
- September 6, 2007 at 1:03 PM
- Rae said...
I just listened to your star1025 ... nice to put a voice to the blog - lol - :)
I've given up w/making my house neat... It'll be clean (not white glove), but not neat. I tried after my first to do both, but then realized I would LOSE my mind if I continue to try, so I stopped trying!
Take Care
- September 6, 2007 at 1:06 PM
I LOVE YOUR BLOG! You are hysterical! I'm a mom of 2 and feel like a total wimp after reading of your escapades!
You have a real gift! ANY publisher would snap you up in a minute if they read this!
- September 6, 2007 at 1:18 PM
Well I'm in my 20s and still live at home (not my fault honest, I don't get paid enough to get my own place .. one day!).
And nope according to my mum the house is always a mess. I mean if she had it her way we'd live in a show home .. me I like the lived in look, papers on the floor, dished in the sink .. you know the normal stuff!
Just imagine in 25 years time it might be nice and tidy, my mum is still longing for that day to come!!
- September 6, 2007 at 1:19 PM
- Nicole P. said...
Your house will only be clean if you want it to be clean. Like right now, my kids are all in school. I could be cleaning, but I don't wanna!!!
- September 6, 2007 at 1:21 PM
Boy, everyone says the same thing in the comments, don't they? Guess it goes to show we're all pretty much in the same boat. Always great to find humor within the chaos!
- September 6, 2007 at 1:46 PM
I was sent what you wrote on ebay via email. I had to read your blog after reading what you wrote on ebay. I love your humor!
One day your house will be clean during daylight hours! They do not stay little forever lol... The problem I found is once they get older, is to get them to pick up after themselves without a huge drama scene. So if they are helpful, it will be sooner, but if they won't help without the drama and the fighting, then when your nest is empty you will be able to enjoy LOL...
I only have two daughters and my oldest is 20 and I love her to peices but let me tell you. She is an absolute slob (she makes up for the lack of other children in the house) and it was always a fight to get her to clean or help. Well there is hope. She moved back in for a little while and she has picked up after herself and OMG let me tell you. I about fell over and passed out. She vacumed my livingroom floor, mopped my kitchen floor and cleaned my kitchen all on her own accord. Yep I did not ask or say a word and she just got up and cleaned. I think hell had a slight blizzard yesterday LOL.
Thank you so much for sharing your humor, I am sure it is a big outlet for you to be able to write and get things off your chest. Remember Bill Cosby always says the kids have brain damage and we just have to learn to live with them lol. HUGS to you Dawn and your family. I'll be thinking of you.
- September 6, 2007 at 1:47 PM
My wife sent me the Ebay ad and I almost died laughing while at work. Of course, that would be a story in itself, since I work for the IRS. BUT, my wife and I only have two kiddoes, sometimes I thank God, but other times I pray to God for more. Anyhoos, my sons and I are on our way to bowling, mom went bingoing so the boys think they get to do something also. So anyways, we're driving in the truck and my 15 yo speaks up and says let's bet. "The loser has to get his body shaved!" Of course it was dark in the truck but if you could have seen the look on my face, it was priceless. I asked my brilliant 15 yo what is the bet? I rarely lose in bowling, so I can't imagine him being so foolish. "The best two out of three games." His response when I shaved his upper body, I compromised, "I thought I was going to win!" He whined, but he was the trooper and tried telling where I couldn't shave, but I won!! Nanny nanny boo boo!!! Yeah yeah, I am a big ol' mean daddy, but I tried talking him out of the bet and I even compromised with him. If I knew how to get the photo on here, I would show you!!
I just wanted to say, I love your postings!! We, my wife and I, aren't having the easiest time with our oldest, so postings like yours are the absolute best!!!!!!
Thanks, Gregory.
- September 6, 2007 at 1:47 PM
Oh yeah I forgot, I also do the school thing in my pajama's! To all the PJ Mom's in the world I SALUTE YOU! Whoo HOO we are deserving lol. Oh by the way, I am also known to go have coffee with my parents at their house still in my flanel bottoms and t-shirt too lol. I know I am bad, but hey life is short and I want to be comfy : )
- September 6, 2007 at 1:50 PM
Oh, sorry for the double posting, but my philosophy on a clean house..."A clean house is not a lived in house!! My house is very functional and well lived in. And besides, as long as the boys' crapola stays in their rooms, I am happy!! And the rule in my house when it comes to cooking and cleaning up, "If me or your mother cooks, the boys do the cleaning." Of course this extends to any food we get delivered to or brought home too. Well come on, we do buy the food!!
- September 6, 2007 at 1:50 PM
- SoBeBabies.com, Inc said...
Great interview! Wishing you continued success.
- September 6, 2007 at 2:03 PM
I have had the following poem on my fridge since my triplets were born four years ago. I look at it every day and it helps me fell a little better about the chaos!
You may not find things all in place,
Friend, when you visit here.
But, we're a home where children live,
We hold them very dear.
And you may find small fingerprints
And smudges on the wall
When the kids are gone, we'll clean them up.
Right now, we're playing ball.
For there's one thing of which we're sure,
These children are on loan.
One day they're always underfoot,
Next thing you know, they're gone.
That's when we'll have a well-kept house,
When they're off on their own.
Right now, this is where children live
A loved and lived in home.
- September 6, 2007 at 2:08 PM
Oh my, I am still laughing about the bit with Brooklyn and the glue stick! All I could picture was a child with a very punk spikey hair, and thinking she looked lovely!
No, I don't think you'll ever get it all picked up even when they grow up some. For some reason kids just never can put things away or pick up after themselves, no until they have their own place and kids of their own will they appreciate it. :)
You definitely are a very creative writer and make so many of us laugh and smile each day!
- September 6, 2007 at 2:19 PM
- Holli said...
Clean house? I'm just waiting until I can finish a meal without having to wipe someone's butt. It's really exciting the first couple of times you hear "I WENT POOPS ON THE POTTY!" but now its kinda lost its luster!
- September 6, 2007 at 2:30 PM
- mdmwood said...
My kids LOVE frozen pancakes! Maybe they just got tired of asking me to heat them up a million times while I did all the other things we Moms do. It makes sleeping a few minutes later on the weekends easier too (you only get five more minutes but anything helps!)
Once again just need to say "Dawn Meehan Rocks!" You always bring a smile to my face.
- September 6, 2007 at 2:31 PM
- Jan Scholl said...
You have a husband? Then pretty much figure your house will NEVER be clean. They are another form of child.I tried to give mine back to his mother but she took the easy way out at 86 and went to heaven where she will never have to clean house after raising 9 kids. She just left me with the spoiled only son.
- September 6, 2007 at 2:31 PM
- Ashley and Audrey said...
Don't worry so much about the house. The kids won't remember in 20 years whether or not crumbs always stuck to their bare feet when they walked through the kitchen growing up. I read recently, "Cleaning your house while your kids are still young is like shoveling the walk before it stops snowing." Duh, that would be dumb. I rest my case.
- September 6, 2007 at 2:46 PM
- Candace Salima (LDS Nora Roberts) said...
I promise you the day will come when your house will be clean during daylight hours. But, that's when your precious children will return, with spouses in tow, and lots and lots of grandchildren. Just think how great your house will look like then?
- September 6, 2007 at 2:50 PM
- rev said...
hahaha, you are hysterical. seriously. i have 'only' 2 children so i can not even begin to imagine how you struggle through the day. thankx for the good laugh, totally love reading your life!!
- September 6, 2007 at 2:53 PM
- mommy2avery&isabel said...
Your blog is hilarious!! I've been reading it ever since your Pokemon cards were up for auction. Actually, I was thinking about you last night as I was attempting to make dinner for 2 (yes, ONLY TWO) kids and myself, and I gave my 14 month old some animal crackers and an empty gallon milk jug to play with, and turned around to find him smashing the crackers to bits with the milk jug. The worst part is, I just shrugged and turned back around to finish making dinner!!
I digress. Love your blog, keep it up! I read it every day.
- September 6, 2007 at 2:57 PM
Hi Dawn
Thankyou for everything you've written to date and I hope you continue for years to come.
I've just been reading that there are calls for a change in the National Anthem in the USA so I thought the following may be a good place to start.
Oh, say, can you see, by our Dawn's early light,
What so proudly she hail'd at the twilight's last gleaming?
Whose clean drapes and slight scars, gained whilst refereeing the fight,
O'er the wideweb we watch'd, while so gallantly cleaning?
And the tempers ne'er flare, choc puds in the air,
Gave proof thro' the night that our heros still there.
O say, does that real home spun humor still save
O'er the lands of the globe and the moms to the brave?
Just a start but I thought some of your other bloggers might have a few more ideas.
Keep up the good work, your writing is an inspiration to more than half a million now and cleaning isn't half as much fun.
- September 6, 2007 at 3:12 PM
- Connie said...
What a hoot. I loved every second reading your blog. I have lived your life, now all mine (save one) are gone. I had the worst empty nest sydnrome when the oldest 4 left and can't even imagine what it will be when the last leaves.
As far as the clean house goes-we had to move the older 4 girls things to a storage unit we rented especially for their stuff. Just so out of town company could stay at our house for the 4th daughters wedding!
Had my oldest grandson for 2 weeks just recently and loved every minute of fruit chews in the carpet and cracker crumbs in my bed. The sour milk on the pillow wasn't the best but now that he is gone I miss him.
Enjoy your little ones now, I have tons of regrets and I apologize to my girls all the time as we laugh at lifes little trials.
This was what got me through lots of days:
Song for a Fifth Child
Mother, oh mother, come shake out your cloth!
Empty the dustpan, poison the moth,
Hang out the washing and butter the bread,
Sew on a button and make up a bed.
Where is the mother whose house is so shocking?
She's up in the nursery, blissfully rocking!
Oh, I've grown as shiftless as Little Boy Blue
(Lullaby, rockaby, lullaby loo).
Dishes are waiting and bills are past due
(Pat-a-cake, darling, and peek, peekaboo).
The shopping's not done and there's nothing for stew
And out in the yard there's a hullabaloo
But I'm playing Kanga and this is my Roo.
Look! Aren't her eyes the most wonderful hue?
(Lullaby, rockaby, lullaby loo).
Oh, cleaning and scrubbing will wait till tomorrow,
But children grow up, as I've learned to my sorrow.
So quiet down, cobwebs. Dust, go to sleep.
I'm rocking my baby. Babies don't keep.
by Ruth Hulburt Hamilton
(first appeared, Ladies Home Journal, October 1958)
God Bless you and yours!
- September 6, 2007 at 3:20 PM
Please forward to me any and all comments that reassure you that someday the house will stay clean when the kids are awake -- I need this same reassurance! I've got five lil' darlings: ages 9, 7, 5, 3, and 1. We're like clockwork around here. Thanks so much for your blog -- it's been a great way for me to take a little comic relief break. And makes me want to start my own. Maybe I'll start off with an entry about the other day when my 9 year old announced that his crotch only bothers him "when the weather changes." What on earth could that possibly mean?
Thanks again! I hope you get some help and support -- since you give that to so many of us, your readers.
Monica in California
- September 6, 2007 at 3:26 PM
- Crazymamaof6 said...
haha! too funny today! i have a new thing on my blog "a clean house is a sign of a wasted life!" we have been having issues with liquid white glue and my 3 yr old playing with it, pouring it on stuff. I'd take a glue stick any day. and frozen waffles eaten while frozen are the preferred way in my house. they learn to adapt i guess. can't reach the toaster? eat it frozen! mmmm good . glad to find out the crazy dirty house is universal with six kids. my house is never clean even when it is clean. a part can be clean at a time. and if it appears clean somewhere, imagine piles of filth somewhere else. it can't all be clean ever! someday when I can afford a live in maid it might be. until then i deal with it.
- September 6, 2007 at 3:31 PM
- Amanda said...
My favorite quote is this:
"Keeping your house clean while your children are young is like shoveling the sidewalk during a snowstorm" Those are words to live by!
Love your blog!
- September 6, 2007 at 3:46 PM
lol i soo feel you here...the only time my house is clean when the kids are asleep. will it ever be clean during the day??? i doubt it. maybe after the kids are grown. as usual great blog!
- September 6, 2007 at 3:52 PM
- Dianne said...
Yes, your house will stay clean someday. When they are ALL at school, all day.
I'm in the first two week period of this glorious experience. I can mop my floor, and nobody walks on it! I can wash the dishes, and the sink stays empty!
I'm heartily glad to see them when they get off the bus, but I'm enjoying the quiet right now.
We won't discuss what's happened in the sewing room...
Oh gawd. The 9 y.o. just informed me that he's a mummy. So much for THAT roll of toilet paper.
- September 6, 2007 at 3:57 PM
****Now I know there are some folks out there who keep their floors clean enough to eat off them. I'm not one of them.****
Hey, what's the point of keeping your floor clean enough to eat off it -- when there's nothing on it to eat?
So in our house you can eat off the floor -- and won't go hungry, *ggg*...
Oh, I can so relate to what happened to you today (minus the being famous part of course, *lol*).
So long,
- September 6, 2007 at 4:02 PM
- Amy Leigh said...
Of course you get a ridiculous amount of email!! You are saying all of the things that moms who have more than one child want to say! By the way, I am so glad to hear that someone else has a child that eats frozen waffles. My two year old loves frozen pancakes! At first, I felt bad, then, I thought, "Hey, that makes the morning easier!" And, just like you, I pretty much let him destroy the house in order to avoid a fit. Then, I straighten up when he is asleep (sometimes). I mean, he's just going to get it all out again, right?
- September 6, 2007 at 4:04 PM
- September 6, 2007 at 4:10 PM
- leslie said...
A friend sent me the link to the outrageous ebay Pokeman sale. I laughed til I cried! And now look who's FAMOUS!!! Congratulations!! May it put piles of $$ in the bank to help send all those kids to college, and you and your husband on many deserved vacations. Don't get so busy that you stop the blog, please.
- September 6, 2007 at 5:00 PM
- nora.lakehurst said...
You are amazing. I hope that you will continue to post blogs for a long time. I hope that you will enjoy your life more and more to the fullest.
- September 6, 2007 at 5:19 PM
- Heather said...
OMG Dawn, I feel like that, especially when I'm trying to clean house for something special. My husband always wants to know why I don't start 3 or 4 days in advance instead of busting my tail the day of the event.
Husband "Well, you should have vacuumed yesterday, then you'd just have to run a quick one for last minute stuff."
Me: "Honey, it won't make any difference, someone will hurl a pop tart, dump their sandwich crumbs or shred some paper then I just have to do it all again."
Husband: "Well at least you can clean the bathrooms."
Me: "So our three year old son can sprinkle the seat, shake water all over the mirror after washing his hands, then smear soap all over the counter. I'll just have to redo it anyway."
Husband: "But.."
Me: "Honey, the house will be shiny for the Book Club meeting I'm having Friday, then I'll collapse in a heap when everyone goes home. Shush and lemme do my job."
So I'm staying up til midnight and making sure the kids get to sleep at 8. *laugh* Then locking the downstairs bathroom!
Love your blogs!!
- September 6, 2007 at 5:19 PM
- The Mama Hood said...
You are hilarious! I am totally adding you to my blog!!
I loved the e-bay thing, I should have tried that when my daughter did that! lol!
- September 6, 2007 at 5:46 PM
- Nicole said...
My little girl uses the glue stick as chapstick... I'll send her over so she can show yours how to use it :)
- September 6, 2007 at 6:00 PM
Hi...this is my first comment on your blog...it will come in as anonymous..only because I am clueless as to how to get my name on here.
I have been reading your blog for about a week now since, of course, I received your Pokemon piece in an email to me.
Anyhow, this You Tube video was sent to me today and I immediately thought of this blog when I saw it. If you all have time....watch this!
Have a great evening! Donna :)
- September 6, 2007 at 6:15 PM
You are just the best...and yes, I for one was disappointed that there wasn't a posting last night. But alas, all mommies need their rest, and we respect that.
Keep doing what you do and making my day a little brighter.
- September 6, 2007 at 6:24 PM
My morning routine also involves dropping off the kids at school. I always have mints and a baseball cap in the van just in case someone stops me to chat. And who cares if you are still in your PJ's! If they are a true "fan" then they can totally understand why you are not dressed.
Bless you and keep up the good work.
- September 6, 2007 at 6:38 PM
- the.eremite said...
See! this is a perfect example of why I don't want kids. My wife, on the other hand, is sold on the whole child rearing ordeal. Maybe I'll make her read this blog for a while before we go through with it... just as a "are you absolutely sure this is what you want?" kind of thing.
the truth is, you make all the stress sound kind of cute. I hope I can keep your sense of humor in the midst of it all.
- September 6, 2007 at 7:08 PM
You are my hero! I am soooooo happy I found your blog omg! How do you do it. Well I ask this question to anyone who has more then one child because I can't even keep up with the cleaning of a small basement suit with a 10 month old walking around. And I say I want a big family? Cheers to you! If I could I'd buy you a drink!
Take care and all the best!
- September 6, 2007 at 7:09 PM
- StampingJoan said...
Ok Gilda (ummmm I mean Dawn!)
When I hit the comment link thingie it said there were 138 comments, but I bet it will be more as I sure others are leaving them as I type! I just roared on this one! I too have dropped of my son in my pj's! Not a sexy teddy or anything like that, but pj pants and a t-shirt! I bet a lot of us do that!
And no make-up.....who cares!!! If Oprah can go on national TV w/o hers I think you can! KWIM!!!!
And don't worry about a messy house. In the end, God is not going to judge us on how clean we kept the house, but how we lived our lives. And right now I think you are doing just fine!
Hugs to you!
Joan in Maryland!
- September 6, 2007 at 7:56 PM
- Lizscraps said...
I'm a recent visitor to your blog -- Having three boys currently, helped raise my two younger sisters 20 years ago as well as three yrs ago having had 13 people living in my home make me and expert... be assured that even when they get bigger the house doesn't stay clean during the day, the type of debris simply changes oh and if you thought Gilda's hair was wild take a peek at my blog -- you'll see my REAL hair in a state of total out of control -- Personally I think my boys bring out he best in me -- just as your kids do you -- it's obvious you love them very much.... hot chocolate? cheers and bottoms up!
thanks for the grins.
- September 6, 2007 at 8:01 PM
My DH is from a family of 13.... yep, baker's dozen. There are five sibling mine. We have one son, who is now away at college.
There is only the two of us home.
I must confess, you house sounds a helleva lot cleaner than mine; even with all the 'interior decorating' your kids do for you. (and this is for free ... so what's the complaint here?)
It's a shame we past the gene 'slobitis' onto our son. He's just not responsible for the slob he is. He sees nothing wrong to have mold and strange things growing up his walls from the 'food' (at least I think it WAS at one time food) he's kicked under his bed, or thrown in his closet.
Someone tell me, how is it a half eaten slice a pizza can make it to is dresser draw, but the clean clothes can not?
It but be another symptom of 'slobitis.'
.... and what's wrong with Gilda's do....?
- September 6, 2007 at 8:18 PM
- ellinghouse said...
I bet my floors might be clean in like 20 years.....possibly. But that would mean I have to get rid of my husband too.....so no, they will never be clean.
- September 6, 2007 at 8:33 PM
You Made me laugh so hard today... I have 4 .... 3 still at home. As the oldest came in and woke me up saying mom it is 6:53. we were supposed to leave for school 3 minutes ago.. I jumped out of bed... didn't even brush my hair... I got the second oldest up... put on my sandals and headed out the door to school in my pj's. luckily I had time after to come home and get ready for work..I don't think a school librarian should be in her pj's all day... I came home tonight and my house is still a mess... but who cares.. Love your stuff.. good luck with everything...
- September 6, 2007 at 8:34 PM
- Christian Family said...
LOVE, LOVE, LOVE your blog! You have the most graceful way of expressing what so many of us mommies experience! Keep up the great work!!!
- September 6, 2007 at 9:17 PM
As a mother of two (yes only 2) with a husband who is gone out of state 75% of the time, your site has been quite therapeutic. It's nice to lock the kids in their rooms when I'm about to pull my last few strands of hair out, turn on the computer, and have some good laughs while reading your blog. (ok, not really lock, but keep them in a safe distant place so I can actually read without having to ignore the whining...mom, more milk, moooommm, Dani's puked, mooommmmmmmm!!!)Thanks for sharing your wacky, frustrating, and silly mommy moments. It has helped normalize this crazy Mommy-world we all live in.
- September 6, 2007 at 10:00 PM
I been wondering the same thing about my house if it will ever be clean during the day light hours. I clean it at night after the girls go to bed and in morning by time we take our 4 yr old to school my house already looks like someone threw a bomb off in it LMAO. And my husband wonders why I just give up on cleaning sometimes LMAO.
Oh and don't even start me with the laundry LMAO I truly thought I had all of it done this morning, I even searched for hidden dirty clothes but once I laid my 3 yr old down for a nap I found more hidden clothes in there bed (blankets) I should of known to look there LMAO.
I love your blog and thank you so much for brighten up my days with them.
- September 6, 2007 at 10:09 PM
- April said...
I spent SIX HOURS on Tuesday just going through TWO kids' toys and trying to figure out where to put it all! Within five minutes of my four year old getting home from preschool yesterday - the family room was a disaster! Cars everywhere - didn't get to bed until one am - I don't know how you do it as it drives me crazy at times, too! Props, though!! Tonight was a godsend - the hubby watched a movie with them while I cleaned up after dinner - I actually sat in the family room, sans toys and read a magazine!! Cherish the moments! I work from home, too, so it definitely makes it a bit harder.
- September 6, 2007 at 10:09 PM
Some years ago my best friend gave me this poem, when I look around my home I try to remember it.
Excuse The House
Some houses try to hide the fact, that children shelter there,Ours boast of it quite openly, the signs are everywhere,For smears are on the windows, little smudges on the doors,I should apologize I guess, for toys all on the floor,But I sat down with my children, we played & laughed & read,And if the doorbell doesn't shine, their eyes will shine instead,For when at times I'm forced to choose, the one job or the other,I want to be a housewife, but first I am a MOTHER
(author unknown)
Be blessed,
- September 6, 2007 at 10:15 PM
- Katirocks said...
I just listened to your interview. I know...I'm a couple days late. Anyhow, I loved it. You sounded great! Good Job!
- Kate
- September 6, 2007 at 11:57 PM
Been reading your posts for a few weeks now - I hate to add to all the stuff to read when you're so busy, but just want to say to not worry about the jammies and public tantrums, etc. - that's what you're known for - dealing with this crazy thing called parenting with a sense of humor, and everyone loves you for it.
- September 7, 2007 at 1:05 AM
- Rach said...
you need to contact that lady with the perfect children - I'm sure she'd have an answer for your messy house too;-)
- September 7, 2007 at 3:50 AM
- Frayed Edges said...
I hate to break it to you but, no...at no point in your life with your house ever be clean or sane. Trust me on this one. My "babies" are 18 and 20 and now the oldest brings HER spawn, I mean child, my wonderful grandboy, to my house so HE can crush cereal into the carpet, spill juiceboxes by squirting the liquid up through the straw and "wash his hands" 40 times in a one hour span while he also "washes" the cats.
So no, don't plan on a clean house in this lifetime.
But it's all good. *smile*
- September 7, 2007 at 4:21 AM
- Evonne & Darren said...
Hahaha... your house will stay clean when the kids have moved out! =)
- September 7, 2007 at 4:53 AM
HI All,
I have to say I loved this post...but, I actually have somthing Helpful to say as well.
I have an amazing friend who was my roomate in college...Debbe'.
("Hi Deb" if you are reading this)
She has The best solution to the spending of 2 hours making pancakes so you can spen 15 seconds eating them...as a previous poster commented.
Debbe' preheats the oven to 350 degrees, greases an appropriately sized cast iron pan, and pours the pancake batter into it and bakes it in the oven! (this also makes it easy to add things like sliced apples, mashed bananas, etc. right into the batter in he pan before baking) Cooking times vary according to amount of batter and size of pan, etc. Test for doneness with a toothpick. Yo will get pretty good at estimating cooking times pretty quickly :)
When done slice into wedges and serve.
I think it must be about 15 years now that I have been making pancakes DEb's way... It is a great timesaver and makes a lot less mess too!
Felice in NJ
- September 7, 2007 at 7:01 AM
- Melissa said...
I dream of my house being clean too. I homeschool, my older son, now turning five, does go to the public school for specials. When his twin brothers go to the school for specials in two years maybe the house will be clean for the forty minutes that they are in school two times a week? Oh, and the evening hours that they are asleep, lol! The other times I guess I will continue to wade through the Lincoln Logs, Legos, Thomas Trains, cars, and other assorted toys that lay around the house. It's amazing how coordinated you become when you have kids and have to walk through their toys to get around your house without breaking your leg!
- September 7, 2007 at 8:00 AM
- Terri Dennehy Pahucki said...
thanks for this. i suddenly don't feel so bad. we live in a condo and i have to wonder--how do people who live in houses do it??? Just a note, it takes me fifteen minutes to clean without my kids present what it takes about 5 hours to clean with them home.
- September 7, 2007 at 11:42 AM
- KamiMari said...
Hi Dawn!
Sounds like you had a boring day... HeeHeeHee : )
So you did the pj thing after you gained a little noteriety... Good for you! You're normal!
Of course if you really want to make a statement you can do what my mother did. We were pretty well known in my small town during high school) because of a drug program my father founded and run. So one day my om decides that she just had enough of coloring her hair to hide all the greys. I wish I could say she just had massive roots but no this lovely woman decided to...gulp...shave her head. Yep, that's right- shave her hair completely off. I used to tell her she looked like this guy- http://www.nndb.com/people/781/000028697/marshappl.jpg . She didn't apperciate that. Anyways, she had this penchant for picking me up from school right from the front door. I got a lot of comments- "who's that old man picking you up?" "did your mom have chemo?" "did your mom have some mental issues?"
It was lovely....
So, if you ever want to get back at your kids for those immaculately cleaned floors and scrumptious hot chocolate recipes AND the bananas on your bedroom floor- just shave your head and pick them up from the front entrance of their school in broad daylight.
Have a great day!
- September 7, 2007 at 12:14 PM
OMG you crack me up so much. And I read this just when I am feeling SO overwhelmed because my house ALWAYS looks like a train wreck.
scrapbook designer for hire
my blog www.myscrapbooklife.com
- September 7, 2007 at 1:01 PM
- Dawn said...
It was great to hear your voice on the podcast (the link went right to it). Thanks for the laugh!!
- September 7, 2007 at 1:10 PM
- Annalea said...
Sorry, Dawn. Odds are that the house won't stay clean until your youngest is at least a teenager . . . and only if you manage to get it through her head that she somehow has a hand in messing it up. ;o)
I'm looking forward to when my 5 (one as yet still unborn) are old enough to not destroy the house daily. Maybe when they're grown and have places of their own? lol Until then, we compromise by having very little stuff available for them to throw around. Toys stay in the basement, and nothing new comes up until what's up goes back down.
Best of luck!
- September 7, 2007 at 3:41 PM
- Qtpies7 said...
My weird 3yo eats frozen corn dogs. Must be the age.
She also cooks corndogs in the microwave without permission, and it aint pretty, for the walls, the microwave, the corndog. She almost set a hotpocket on fire one day. I'm ready to chuck the nuker for safety's sake.
- September 7, 2007 at 4:57 PM
Hey... we have 6 kids and a 7th on the way, and 2 were clothes hogs, changing every hour! My hubby had a great Idea... Screw large hooks in the back of the drawers, and lock the dresser with a broomstick handle through the hooks during the day! Dresser is open morning and eveing only! ta da!
- September 7, 2007 at 9:46 PM
- ~K said...
Hey there! I discovered your blog through Stumble! on Firefox.
My mom would know exactly what you're going through--I am proud to be one of six kids myself.
Only thing now is that she's got one married, one traveling the country, one in college, two in high school and one in middle school. Wait till your kids are all teenaged--that'll be fun.
I love reading your stuff, it reminds me of when I was a kid. I found your ebay pokemon story also through Stumble and I can definitely relate to grocery trips. My siblings and I were always "Can we get the Lucky charms?" "No." "ooo, those doughnuts look yummy--"No, guys, we are NOT getting doughnuts today!"
As for keeping the house clean? Ha. Not on your life. We had tons of pets when I was little (between then and now we've had cats, dogs, hermit crabs, fish, hamsters, dwarf hamsters, turtles, frogs, a hamster-mouse hybrid, and the occasional snake the cats would find). Mom and Dad would spend time trying to clean but inevitably, the only times it happened were during the night.
Now that there's only three of us six at home, there's only slightly less mess. :P
I love reading your blog, because I remember it all from the kid's view. You have a wonderful way of story telling that has brightened my day completely. Thanks. =)
- September 8, 2007 at 6:35 PM
- mynameismommy said...
You know what Dawn? You've got Timing! The Gilda Radner hair link, well, I have to go change my pants. I hope you had clean underwear!
- September 8, 2007 at 7:44 PM
- Gigi said...
Yes someday you'll have a clean house, when your kids are all grown.....unless of course THEY have kids. Then you're screwed!
- September 8, 2007 at 9:59 PM
- Jo said...
You probably heard this a hundred times, but in case you haven't... Cleaning the house while your kids are still young is like shoveling the snow while it's still snowing. Works for me! Of course there comes a time when you simply must leave the house (preferably BEFORE you run out of diapers), at which time you must get the shovel and dig your way out. This phenomenon can usually be witnessed directly following the panicked phrase: "company's coming!".
- September 10, 2007 at 8:58 PM
It happens when they move out of the house! They're awake and your house is clean!
- September 11, 2007 at 11:14 AM
I would just like to say how muchI am enjoying reading your blog daily. I am a busy mum of 4 in the UK and can appreciate your day to day trials and tribulations! Ain't life a blast with kids!
Best wishes to you and your gang!
Lynn (Edinburgh - UK)
- September 13, 2007 at 10:47 AM
- Gayle said...
Clean? I'm really unsure what the word means. We have eight. You can have a meal (or two or three) off the carpet...not a healthy one, but I think our immune system is pretty good about now. We're in Alaska and havin' about as much fun as one can have in a day. It's 1:00am and Lukey Monster (1) and Livvy (2) aren't finished destroying the house. Tomorrow is a hockey day...three boys on three different competitive teams means hockey 1-3 times a day every day of the week until April. The babies aren't pleased that Daddy went to bed...but our wonderful provider has to sleep sometime! I had a blog Once Upon A Time...but I am so busy. I think maybe you have motivated me to get going again...it was something I enjoyed. We are at www.twopluseight.blogspot.com and the kids' hockey team is www.arcticlions.com Go Lions! Funny your eBay thing came my way. I was just on eBay trying to figure out what I could sell to cover the thousands and thousands of dollars we need to pay for hockey (can you say at least 5 trips Outside?!). Really. I was checking on the moose poop market. I have lots of it around my house. Especially when they dine in the garden. eBay really is a wonderful world...it sure has changed yours'. Good luck...maybe you'll get lucky and you'll be able to hire a housekeeper...then you can have your kids and live clean, too. :)Gayle
- September 15, 2007 at 4:00 AM
Don't expect you to EVER have time to write back lol but just wanted to let you know you have ONE more fan. lol I love this. Your one funny lady.
- October 20, 2007 at 12:18 AM
Um, yes, the diarrhea was definitely caused by the soft soap. I know, cause I had to call poison control the time I walked into the bathroom to see my 2yo (at the time) DD gasping and gulping with bubbles coming out of her mouth. The poison control people said that she'd probably wind up with diarrhea in a few hours if she had only ingested a small amount of soap. If it had been a significant amount, she would've puked.
Oh the joys of motherhood!
Love your blog.
- October 29, 2007 at 12:54 PM


text:
This week's prompt reminds us of the major pleasure we get in finding original documents that our ancestors must have touched and written.
This Danson family bible was an important impetus in starting me on the family history trail. Kept In the glass fronted bookcase in my grandfather's front room at Poulton-le-Fylde, Lancashire, the bible recorded the marriage of his parents James Danson (1852-1906) and Maria Rawcliffe (1859-1919) on the 12th May 1877 and the birth of their first four children - all sons - Harry, John, Robert and Albert.
Sadly all but Robert died young - Harry aged 30, Albert as an infant, and John in 1917 during the First World War.
As their family grew, enthusiasm for keeping the record obviously waned, as they went on to have five more sons (William - my grandfather, another Albert, Tom, Frank, and George) and as their last child only daughter Jennie, none of whom were listed.
James' wife's names were given as Martha Maria, (right) a spinster, aged 18 of Thistleton, with no occupation, no address given, so nothing to indicate why she was then living at Thistleton - a tiny hamlet. Later research revealed that Maria's eldest sister Ann was living in the village where her husband was a gamekeeper. The witnesses to the marriage were Henry Danson and Elizabeth Ann Bailey, who proved to be James' brother and eldest sister.
A second Danson Bible came to light through an internet contact who proved to be descended from John Danson, brother of my great grandfather James (above). John as the eldest son had inherited the family bible which included three pages of scrawled writing. It gets a bit confusing as the same Christian names appear down the generations!
Fifty years on, John (1844-1914), my great grandfather's brother, made a much neater job of recording births and deaths in his family, with this beautifully written page which even includes the days of the week when they were born.
With thanks to Janet, my third cousin once removed, for the images from the earlier Danson Bible. .

subset: commoncrawl


text:
Welcome disc golfer! You can login or create an account.
Questions? Call us: (785) 258-2494
The Westside VIP Boatman is an overstable distance driver that has a very good glide and control. Good also for long and precise sidearm throws. It can handle a surprising amount of wind. If your PDGA rating is more than 950 you may want to throw Boatman backhand. For less experienced players, the Westside Boatman can be best used as a long and precise sidearms throw disc, or at situations where a right-handed players needs to go left. Westside Boatman is a PDGA approved disc.
Power player driver, good in windy conditions.
Speed 11, Glide 5, Turn 0, Fade 2 (using Innova's system)
Official specifications
Max weight 177.6 gram
Diameter 21.4 cm
Height 1.9 cm
Rim depth 1.3 cm
Rim thickness 2.2 cm
Inside rim diameter 17.0 cm
Rim depth/diameter ratio 6.1
Rim configuration 29.50
Flexibility 10.32
PDGA certificate number 11-12
Available in VIP and Tournament Plastic, 161 - 177 grams
VIP plastic properties:
* Super-durable hi-tech plastic with excellent performance
* Beautiful translucent colors
* Maintains flight characteristics and reliability for a longer time
* Suitable for recreational and pro players
* Very similar to Latitude Opto-plastic and Innova Champion
Tournament plastic properties:
* Advanced version of VIP-plastic containing technical polymers
* Beautiful iridescent opaque colors, some solid colors
* Same durability as VIP Plastic, but grip is slightly better
* Very similar to Latitude GOLD plastic and Innova Star


text:
★Demir Kazik
- Height: 25m
- Ascents: 1
- Ethic: inherited from Geyikbayırı
There are no restrictions aside from respecting the environment as the local government has been very tolerant and we don't want that to change. All bolting is stainless steel and not more than 10 years old. Between 20 to 30 new routes are opened every year and visitors are welcome to contribute to that with local advice.
- Tags:
Route History:
- There is no known route history.
Located in Poseidon approx:
Lat/Long: 36.877882,30.493132
Route Grade Citations
|Community registered grade
|Ben Jenga
Route quality
Overall quality score: 50%
Lead Styles
Comments keywords
Learn about creating circuits.
Activity Configure
Check out what is happening on Demir Kazik (note there is an unresolved system issue where ascents logged before 2010 are not displayed in the stream below). If you just want to see beta then click on view ascents with beta.


text:
Texas Republican
Rep. Michael McCaul
Estimated wealth
1013% since 2004
Financial approach
Invests in: Finance / Insurance / Real Estate, Mixed, Miscellaneous Business
McCaul's financial portrait
The Post examined the personal finances disclosed by all members of Congress and computerized by Center for Responsive Politics to show how they manage their assets and invest their money.
House median
Estimated wealth
$380.4 million in 2010
Change in estimated wealth
1013% since 2004
More wealth and more aggressive
Lawmakers who use riskier investment strategies and/or borrowing to increase wealth.
Spouse's estimated wealth in 2010
56% of McCaul's wealth
More aggressive
Financial approach
Spousal Assets
75 lawmakers report a significant amount of holdings in the names of their spouses. The assets include stocks, retirement funds, real estate and bank accounts.
What industries does McCaul invest in?
Many assets can be tied to specific industries, such as finance, agriculture or
natural resources. "Mixed" investments are assets not tied to a specific industry.
McCaul's estimated
2010 liabilities
What asset types does McCaul hold?
Assets are lumped into groups such as real estate, stocks,
mutual funds or cash.
NOTE: "Mixed" investments are assets that are not tied to a specific industry. Charted change in annual estimated wealth is capped at 200 percent increase and 100 percent decrease for clarity. See the full methodology here.
SOURCES: Congressional financial disclosure forms, Center for Responsive Politics, Washington Post analysis.
About the data
The estimation of assets for lawmakers is based on calculating the midpoint of reported value ranges for holdings and liabilities that members of Congress list on financial disclosure forms. It does not reflect assets lawmakers are not required to disclose, such as personal residences and non-interest bearing bank accounts. The estimation is not intended to provide a complete portrait of the net worth of each legislator, but rather show their relative standing in Congress and how their holdings have changed over time.
If you're a member of Congress who would like to further clarify your financial portrait, please contact us at email@example.com.
See other Texas lawmakers
- Sen. John Cornyn (R)
- Sen. Kay Bailey Hutchison (R)
- Rep. Joe Barton (R)
- Rep. Kevin Brady (R)
- Rep. Michael Burgess (R)
- Rep. Quico Canseco (R)
- Rep. John Carter (R)
- Rep. Mike Conaway (R)
- Rep. Henry Cuellar (D)
- Rep. John Culberson (R)
- Rep. Lloyd Doggett (D)
- Rep. Blake Farenthold (R)
- Rep. Bill Flores (R)
- Rep. Louie Gohmert (R)
- Rep. Charlie Gonzalez (D)
- Rep. Kay Granger (R)
- Rep. Gene Green (D)