text:
The Dishwasher: Dead Samurai
FAQ/Walkthrough by thecrobar
Version: 1.0 | Updated: 05/20/09 | Search Guide | Bookmark Guide
,--. o | | | |.,---.|---.. . .,---.,---.|---.,---.,---. | ||`---.| || | |,---|`---.| ||---'| `--' ``---'` '`-'-'`---^`---'` '`---'` ,--. | ,---. o | |,---.,---.,---| `---.,---.,-.-.. .,---.,---.. | ||---',---|| | |,---|| | || || ,---|| `--' `---'`---^`---' `---'`---^` ' '`---'` `---^` ============================= 1. Introduction...(IT1) ============================= Table of Contents -------------------- 1. Introduction..........(IT1) 2. Controls..............(CT2) 3. Gameplay..............(GP3) Tactics...............(TCT) Weapons...............(WPN) 4. Guide.................(GD4) Foghorn Café..........(FCZ) Ivy Trail.............(ITZ) Gray Fortress.........(GFZ) Nord Trainyard........(NTZ) Drome Rail............(DRZ) L'Opera Dramatique....(LDZ) Metatron District.....(MDZ) Grace Chapel..........(GCZ) Mono Catacombs........(MCZ) Cam Rooftops..........(CRZ) Cam Lobby.............(CLZ) In Processing.........(IPZ) Cam Core..............(CCZ) 5. Psycho Pick Locations.(PP5) 5. Closing...............(CL6) =================== Introduction =================== Hello, and welcome to my guide for Dishwasher: Dead Samurai, my eighth FAQ. The purpose of this guide is to provide strategies for how to complete the main game, as well as tips for general combat and how to best use each of your weapons. The guide is organized in to five sections: you're in the introduction, the controls section lists the game's controls, gameplay provides tips for general combat and how stuff works, and the main guide is the way through the game. The introduction and the closing section have contact information as well as some other information about the guide. If you have any questions, you can contact me at email@example.com. ============================== 2. Controls...(CT2) ============================== Button..........Function L.Stick.........Movement R.Stick.........Dodge/Warp A...............Jump X...............Light Attack Y...............Heavy Attack B...............Grab/Interact D-Pad...........Secondary Weapon Select L.Trigger.......Combine with Directions for Dodges/Warp R.Trigger.......Combine with Face Buttons for Magic L.Bumper........Instant Magic R.Bumper........Weapon Change ============================== 3. Gameplay...(GP3) ============================== The gameplay of the Dishwasher is rather simple. The game is made of missions/levels, each one having its own location and rooms. Primarily, the game consists of moving from room to room and killing anything that moves before collecting your treasure and exiting to fight more bad guys. This section is set up to explain a little more in-depth the stuff you'll encounter in each level. A. Gameplay Enemy Rooms ---------- The most common type of room in the game. You'll be trapped with a set amount of enemies inside of a room, and to continue you will need to kill them all. Enemies will appear in waves by appearing near the ceiling and falling down to meet you. A new enemy will appear every time you kill another enemy until the room has been cleared of all foes. If you've ever played a beat-em'-up before, this should all be pretty familiar. Containers ---------- Often appearing after a room full of enemies, containers are bamboo boxes filled with goodies. Typically, containers will drop health orbs, magic skulls, and spirals. Occasionally they will drop nutribread or uberfishes, particularly before boss fights or in longer levels. Rarely, containers will contain psycho picks or continue hearts. These are few and far between though, and all psycho pick locations are in the main guide. Sell-Bots ---------- Sell-bots are helpful little robots that populate the game's levels. As you might expect, they work like merchants and sell items to you in exchange for spirals. Sell-bots are also the only place to upgrade your weapons/abilities. You can only carry a certain amount of each item. Each Sell-bot has the same items as follows: Nutribread: A cheap recovery item that replenishes a small amount of health, around 1/5 of your overall health. That might not seem like a lot, but they can still save your life in a difficult situation. Keep a few around at all times. Uberfishes: The much more expensive uberfishes completely restore your health to 100%, regardless of the size of your health bar. Unless you have a lot of money, only buy them before big boss fights or if you're having a hard time with something. Continue Hearts: Continue hearts allow you to restore your continue in the middle of a level, effectively giving you four more lives. You should be able to see how they'd be useful, but there are problems. It's best to use them only at the ends of longer levels to avoid wasting them. Honestly, don't waste too much of your money on these. They're ridiculously over priced and while going back through a level does suck, you'll get more spirals. I'd recommend buying uberfishes over these and using them intelligently, they'll get you a lot further. Psycho Picks ---------- Psycho Picks are needed to upgrade your abilities in the game, and you can find them in any number of places. Psycho picks are limited in number and located in specific locations throughout the game, and there are generally one or two in each level. They can be obtained through quite a few different methods, the following activities give out Psycho picks as rewards: Killer Solos: Throughout the world, you will find guitars in a few specific locations. By picking up a guitar, you can play a rhythm game by pressing buttons on the controller as they cross the square in the center of the screen. Getting over 70% of the button presses nets you a psycho pick, which shouldn't be too hard to do. There are also three secret guitar solos only available in Samurai difficulty (If you find yourself missing three picks after beating the game in normal mode, this is where they are). These solos are much more difficult. While I was able to get through them with a little practice, I have heard some people have been able to use the Guitar controller from the "Guitar Hero" games to beat these. Time Trials: There are numerous rooms in the game that have time limits. If you're able to beat the enemies in the time limit, you will get a psycho pick. To win these, try to keep your enemies as close you as possible and avoid powerful attacks that knock them back. Also try to fight in areas of the room that offer few platforms or other pieces of the environment to use as cover so you can easily get as foes. These can get pretty intense, but shouldn't be too hard on normal or Ninja mode. Containers: Quite often, containers will have psycho picks in them. Generally speaking, these are the containers you'll run in to automatically. They sometimes appear after large fights, but they are also located in "hidden" areas of the environment you normally might not have gone to. These are the most common psycho picks location types. Upgrades ---------- Upgrades are essential to your progress in The Dishwasher and can be purchased at any Sell-bot. Upgrades are controlled through a combination of Psycho Picks and Spirals. Spirals are obtained from killing enemies and through combos: the better the combo, the more spirals you'll get. They're also used to buy regular items as well, and if you ever find yourself lacking them go back and play an earlier level to get more. You'll also need the above mentioned psycho picks to upgrade: at least one psycho pick will needed for each upgrade along with a set number of spirals. These are the following things you can upgrade: Weapons: Each weapon you get, other than the cleavers, can be upgraded twice. Each upgrade adds more moves onto the list that you can perform with the weapons, and generally makes them much better than their previous incarnation. (Upgrades may also improve damage dealt, but I'm not positive about this.) Each weapon can be upgraded two times. All upgrades need a single psycho pick and spirals, except for the Shift blade which requires two psycho picks and a greater number of spirals. As far as weapon upgrades go, the most important ones to get are the level 3 Kamas and the Level 2 chainsaw, and at least the level 2 shift blade. While other ones will certainly help, these give you the best abilities. Health: You can upgrade you health as well, which will add a little sliver onto your life bar. It might not seem like much, but it lets you take another hit or two. I'd recommend getting all of the life upgrades in the game, you can't go wrong with more health. Magic: Upgrading magic will allow you to store more in reserve, not make it more powerful. You can eventually store up to five skulls worth of magic at once, though the later upgrades are quite pricey. Upgrading your magic is one of the first things you should do in the game: you only have one stored to start with, and upgrading turns magic from a last ditch save-your-ass tactic to a regularly useable instant kill. You need to upgrade to at least level 3, but magic is probably one of the best things to upgrade if you have trouble with the regular fights in the game so don't be shy about maxing it out early on if you're having trouble. Multiplayer ---------- There are two items in the game that will allow another person to jump into the fray and help you out. Obviously, this makes the game a lot easier when you let another player help you out. Here are the locations of the two items: Dishwasher's Shadow: In the "St. Crux Cemetery" level, it's in an alcove right next to the guitar. Shadow Rock: In the "Ivy Trail" level, warp straight up on the second screen to access a secret room with the item inside. (You might need to playing on higher difficulties to get this, though I'm not positive.) B. Weapons The life-blood of any true warrior, weapons are essential to combat. This section is designed to instruct you in the use of each of your weapons and how best to use them. Cleavers: Obtained: Start of game ---------- While the Cleavers aren't terrible in their own right, when compared to other weapons they're outclassed in pretty much every single area. Of course, as your first weapon in the game that might be expected. The cleaver's main weakness is that it can't be upgraded: this leaves its movepool relatively bland and frankly, not that useful. The cleavers work until you get you get the Kama (which are pretty much the same weapon only a thousand times better), but other than that perooid of time stick with other weapons. The cleavers can be useful though: they attack fast and have multiple attacks that launch enemies across a room. This doesn't make them great for combos, but it works quite well to make room if you need a breather. Shift Blade: Obtained: End of the first level, "Foghorn Café'" ---------- The Shift Blade is your primary weapon throughout the game. It doesn't really excel at any one thing, but it's not bad at anything either. It has decent range, it can combo well, and it has a wide variety of moves. However, the best feature of the Shift Blade is the ability to warp. Warping replaces your normal dodge with a warp that covers the same amount of distance, but it also causes you to complete vanish for the brief period of time that you move there. This can lead to all sorts of awesome combo potential, as well as tons ways to mix and match with other weapons. The Warp also makes the Shift Blade great for boss fights and more difficult encounters, as it can easily get you out of any tense situation and warp through attacks. The Shift Blade is the most expensive weapon to upgrade, and frankly it's not the nest weapon to obsessively upgrade. It doesn't get much better with the new levels, unlike a few of the other weapons, though it's worth it if you happen to have some psycho picks lying around. With upgrades, the weapon gets a few faster attacks and a couple of nice uppercut-style moves but nothing ground breaking. The Kama Obtained: Towards the beginning of the "St. Crux Cemetery" level ---------- The Kama are sort of like better versions of the Cleavers: They don't deal much damage with each individual hit, but they hit fast and hit a lot. The Kama are great at combo attacks and aerial moves: they have a ton of moves that move you across the ground and the air, and even moves that launch enemies into the air and follow them up with attacks. As far as weaknesses go, the Kama's only real fault is its lack of damage dealing ability. Individual attacks are largely useless and require combos to effectively defeat enemies. Against bosses, this makes the Kama largely ineffective other than a few certain instances. With the upgrades, the Kama becomes even more mobile and gains a few really nice movement attacks that let you slide along the floor and even through the air. The Chainsaw Obtained: At the end of the "L'Opera Dramatique" level ---------- The Chainsaw is the polar opposite of the Kama. The Chainsaw is brutally powerful, and can kill regular enemies in seconds. It deals insane amounts of damage to bosses as well, and when used well can kill them with almost no difficulty. Often, you can deal damage to bosses as fast as they damage you. However, the Chainsaw does have its share of weaknesses. The trade-off for the power is steep: the Chainsaw is by far the slowest weapon in the game. And while it is powerful, it can sometimes be hard to hit enemies with its short attack range and lack of much movement. Finally, at higher difficulties the Chainsaw becomes much less useful when you need to focus on dodging attacks much more than giving them out. A far as upgrades are concerned, the Chainsaw gets remarkably better. It mixes in a few fast attacks with the shift Blade that make it much more combo viable, but the best upgrade comes with a new power attack that's almost always a one-hit kill against non-boss enemies. Make sure to upgrade the Chainsaw ASAP, it becomes a powerhouse weapon. The Arsenal Obtained: At the end of the "Grace Chapel" level ---------- The Arsenal is a side-step from the rest of the weapons in the game. It's a dual wielded Uzi and Shotgun, the X button controls the Uzi and the Y button controls the Shotgun. The Uzi is weak but fires incredibly fast, and the Shotgun is the best weapon in the game for blasting people across whatever area you're in. Various other button combinations allow you to perform a few little tricks like dodge-firing or slow-mo. To be honest, this is one of those love-it-or-hate it weapons that doesn't really fill a role that the other weapons in the game don't already cover. I'd recommend going back to an earlier level after you get it and trying it out to see of you like it. Personally I'm not a big fan, but it can be useful for boss fights and can be great when combined with the Shift Blade for combo attacks (especially at the end of a combo to blast enemies away or keep your combo counter going from long range). With upgrades, the Arsenal gains a few combos that incorporate the shift blade and some new acrobatic tricks. It becomes a lot better, so if you like it it's certainly worth an upgrade. Magic Obtained: Ivy trail, Drome Rail, Metatron District ---------- The Dishwasher will eventually get the ability to cast magic spells, and will learn three different ones by the end of the game. Magic can be used in two ways: Pressing the right trigger and one of the face buttons will cast the appropriate spell, and pressing the left bumper will cast the same spell as you did last time. When you use magic, time stops for a moment before it activates, during which you are invincible (This makes magic great when you're in a tight spot). Otherwise, magic should be used on a case by case basis: magic is very powerful, but doesn't come cheap. It is charged by the green skull icons just below your health bar: each skull is one "casting" of a spell. Upgrading your magic allows you store more skulls at any time (up to five total), slowing you to use magic much more freely and much more often. I'd recommend at least level 3, but if you're having trouble with the non- boss fights than magic is one of the best things to upgrade in the games. You will eventually learn the following three spells: Lightning: :Lightning attacks in a wide radius around the Dishwasher, hitting all of the enemies around him. It's your first spell in the game, and as such is also the weakest, but it hits every enemy on screen. Great for helping to keep your combo counter up. Crusher: The second spell you learn, Crusher magic hits all enemies standing on the ground and those just slightly above it. (It gets weaker as it moves up the screen.) Crusher magic is extraordinarily useful in situations where your enemies happen to be on the ground, but otherwise it can be a bit of a waste. Fireball: Your final spell is the most powerful one, but also the one with the least range. Fireball launches a human-sized projectile in front of the Dishwasher in an upwards arc. It will kill any non-boss in a single hit if it fully connects, but the small radius can make it hard to actually hit the enemies. However, the power behind it makes the fireball the best magic to use against the game's bosses. ============================== 4. Guide...(GD4) ============================== This section covers the guide for the main game. It is organized by levels, each level being made up of an overall walkthrough, locations of secrets, and strategies for any new enemies encountered in that level. The guide was written while being played on "Normal" difficulty, so the strategies will primarily apply to that mode. However, Ninja mode is largely the same as Normal with some minor changes in enemy placement so the strategies should work for that to. Samurai mode is unlocked by beating the game at least once, and is quite difficult. While many of these strategies might work, some of them won't and the ret will require you to be a lot better at dodging attacks than normal mode. Side Note: While many of the enemies have "official" names, this guide was largely written when I did not know those. For the most part it should be easy to identify most enemies by my descriptions though, even if they don't have the same name as in arcade mode. ==================== A. Foghorn Café...(FCZ) ==================== You'll start out in a nondescript room with an exit to either side. The one to the left has nothing, so head right in to the next room. Upon entering, an enemy will appear: --- Agent: Agents are one of the most common enemies in the game, as well as one of the weakest. They have three different attacks, but none of them deal that much damage: they'll try and shoot you with their guns on the ground, they can aim diagonally upward and shoot, and at close range they'll try to hit you with them. These guys are basically punching bags: get in close and don't let them recover and they can't do a thing. Avoid jumping in to them though, you don't want to be met with a bullet to the face. Any weapon works against them. There are three enemies in total. Use this room as a training grounds in order to test out your cleavers: get down how far away they can hit something, how long it takes to kill and agent, how far you roll, etc. After killing them, head to the next room. In the net room you'll be met by another agent and a new enemy: --- Baton: These guys are usually found wherever the other agents are. Specializing in close range combat, these guys like to use a baton to hit you at close range. Like the Agents, get in fast and don't let up. These guys are probably even less of a threat than the normal agents, the only real advantage they have on you is a little bit more range when close up. They don't have any tricks up their sleeves, so go all out. In this room you'll fight a couple of the new baton enemies as well as a whole mess of agents. The only thing to avoid during this fight is the dishwasher in the center of the room: it's just the perfect height to get hit by the Agent's gunfire. Try to group the enemies together as much as possible, and when they're dead head to the next room. The only thing in it is a sell-bot. You probably can't afford much now, so save your spirals and move on. Run up the boxes in the next room by jumping towards them and holding up, then head through next feature-less room to find another battle. Kill the first two enemies, then watch the scene. It will introduce a new foe: --- Soldiers: Soldiers are fairly common, and can wipe you out if you aren't careful. They have three attacks: at close range they'll try to bash you with the butt of their rifle, and two rappelling moves. For these two moves, the soldiers shoot a hook up to the ceiling and suspend themselves in the air. The first of these is a downward diagonal stream of rifle fire, and the second is a bomb. To avoid the rifle fire, either get under them and attack them from the other side or run away. To avoid the bomb, (you can tell it's a bomb instead of rifle fire when they go waaaaaay up on the ceiling and shout "fire in the hole" as they ascend), dodge away from them. These guys can be dangerous, so play it safe: don't attack them in the air unless you're attacking their backs, and no matter what get away from the bomb blast. When fought 1 on 1, these guys are easy enough to kill just by comboing them. It becomes more complicated when they're in a crowd: try to take them out first, but not to the point where you're getting swarmed by other enemies to do so. The fight will now shift into a large skirmish between you and a large group of soldiers and agents. Focus on the soldiers and use the agents to keep up your combo meter when the soldiers latch on to the ceiling. After they're all dead, move on. In the next room, you'll see a short scene before launching in to your first boss battle: --- The Masked Rider The masked rider really only has a single attack: charging in to you with his horse. We can't let that happen now, can we? Stand on top of one the platforms on either side of the area. When he charges at you, he'll stop when he reaches the wall for a moment. Drop down and him a few times. When the horse whinnies, he's getting ready to charge again so jump back up on the platform to escape a beat down. Rinse and repeat. Between charges, work on killing the multitudes of Baton enemies that pour in to the area. After taking down the horse, the rider will dismount and fight you himself. Dispatch any remaining enemies and get ready. He doesn't really gain many new moves in his second form. He has a few little sword slashes he'll use against you on the ground, but other wise he sits back and waits for you to attack. That's when he uses his warp move to appear above your head and try to finish you off. Dodge out of the way to avoid the slash, then roll back in to him and hit him a few times. He'll most likely slash again, and you repeat the process until he's done for. Watch for the prompts though: during the fight he might get stunned, which gives him a button over his head like a defeated enemy. Repeatedly press the button to deal some more damage to him. When he has about half of his health left, he'll vanish. You will get a consolation prize: his sword, The Shift Blade. Note: There is a Psycho Pick in this level, but I'd recommend coming back to get it after a level or two. To get it, start the level over and head to the second room where the agents appear for this first time. After killing them, head back to the left and out the other side of the room you started the level in. You should be in an alley. Some enemies will spawn for a time trial, just soldiers and agents. Kill them to get the pick. ==================== B. Ivy Trail...(ITZ) ==================== Using your new weapon, you can now warp instead of roll. This can not only lead to fantastic combos, but new pathways as well. After this point in the game, the Shift Blade becomes your main weapon. It will always be equipped to the Bumper along with one other sub-weapon, which can be chosen with the D-pad. Head forward a few screens until you reach a path where you can either travel vertically using the warp or continue on foot like normal. The upper path has a powerful group of enemies you really don't need to fight, so for now continue on foot. The next area has a wealth of Agent and Baton enemies. Killing them all in under two minutes nets you a case with an all valuable Psycho Pick in it, so get to chopping. Continue until you reach a vertical pathway with a Sell-bot at the top. Buy what you want, but I would recommend saving for the Shift Blade upgrade. Move left from here to enter a fight against all the different enemies up to this point. The Agents are the biggest threat here: the ceiling is so low you can easily jump and hit any rappelling soldiers, making them much less threatening. Kill all of them to gain an electrosphere, which will com in useful soon. Head left to another vertical passage and kill the two enemies, then move up in to a new one. Moving up and around this room will lead you back to the start of the level, so head to the right instead. Kill the single enemy in the room, then warp to the top. Get close to the weird electric thing to turn it off with your electrosphere. Head down on the other aide and open the container for some goodies, then make your way right. There are two Agents on the stairs, use your warp to avoid their angled shots and kill them. Continue down the stairs to the right and through a few screens, eventually coming to and end at the level boss: --- Cannon Cyborg The Cannon Cyborg has two different main attacks: It will shoot rockets out of its arm cannon and it will attempt to smash you with said cannon. To easily finish this fight, equip your Shift blade and get near the Cyborg. This should prompt him to start his slam attack: he'll raise his cannon over his head and try to slam it down on you. Right before he brings his arm down, warp behind him and attack him a few times. He will then turn around and repeat the process. It might take a few tries, but you should be able to get down the rhythm of his attacks fairly quickly. Continue warping back and forth to kill him. Head right off the screen to end the level. ==================== C. Gray Fortress...(GFZ) ==================== Head forward in to the next room to face a wave of Agents and Soldiers. At this point, you shouldn't have any trouble with these sorts of enemies anymore. Over the next few couple levels, Soldiers are going to become the most common enemy in the game. If you're still having trouble fighting them, try some arcade or the previous levels for some extra training. After the enemies are dead- it shouldn't take long- head to the next room. At the top is a sell-bot if you need it, otherwise continue forward. In this next room there is another large wave of enemies, only this time with a new foe: Rocket-Man --- Resembling space men, these guys only have a single attack: they'll fire a missile at you while floating around on their little rocket pack. As annoying as that might seem, they're incredibly easy to take down once you know how. Grabbing one will cause the Samurai to plummet to the earth with the goon in tow. Upon crashing in to the ground, he will explode and die in a single hit. This might not gain you many combo points, but it's better than being shot in the face with a rocket. If you want combo points, hit them out of the air and kill them on the ground where they're defenseless. The room consists of a wave of the new Rocket enemies and the same old soldiers. Take out the soldiers as usual, but concentrate on the Rocket-men first to avoid being blindsided by a rocket. The room to the right of this one has container with a psycho pick, grab it before heading to the upper left corner and exit once you're done. Open the container for some goodies in the following room and then take out the two Agents in the next. Enter the next room and begin the vertical trek through the nest two uneventful rooms until you come to a shaft that has enemies. Soldiers and Rockets will spawn at the top, and Agents will spawn at the bottom. Take them out like before, Rockets first then soldiers. Take out the Agents on the bottom last, they shouldn't give you any trouble until you move down to where they are. Go through the next room to come out on a rope: this is the fun part. The Dishwasher will begin sliding down the rope, only to be assaulted by a large wave of Rocket-men. You know what to do. Warp around with the shift blade to get right in their faces, then grab them and throw them on the ground. There are a lot of them, but constant warping should prevent you from meeting any rocket blasts. After killing the final one the path will end. Proceed across the next screen to exit the level. ==================== D. St. Crux Cemetery...(SCZ) ==================== Head across the first screen of the cemetery and enter the next to find a new enemy waiting for dismemberment: Zombie --- Zombies are the most pathetic enemies in the game. Their sole attack is to swipe at you, which only works at extremely close range. Seeing as you're some sort of badass, half-dead warrior they shouldn't be a problem for you, right? Guess again. Most of the time Zombies might appear harmless, but they often have two distinguishing features: appearing along with other enemies, and there generally being a ton of them. Individually, a zombie shouldn't give you any trouble. In groups, try to get them all on one side of you and go for the big attacks, hitting them all at once. When they appear with other enemies, focus on attacking the more powerful foes first. When they're knocked down, eliminate a few zombies before they get up. In any case, these first few batches of Zombies shouldn't pose any sort of threat to you. Continue forward till you get to a split in the path where you can go strait or down a shaft. Head down the shaft for now. At the bottom, you'll find a whole mess o'zombies waiting to be completely dead. During the fight a few soldiers will show up, take them out first before continuing on the zombies. After killing everything, a container will spawn in the middle of the room. Open it to be rewarded with a new weapon: The Kama. The Kama are quite fast, but aren't that powerful. They're best at juggling enemies: it's really easy to smash an enemy in to the air, follow them up and hit them a few times, and them slam the back in to the ground for some more pain. They're certainly better than your cleavers though, I'd equip them right away. Head through the newly opened door to find a key. Head through the room and out the other side to find a sell-bot. Before buying anything, switch to the shift blade and warp up out of the room to the top of the next room. You should see a guitar laying on the ground. Pick it up to play a kick-ass solo, following along with the button presses on the controller. If you get more than 70%, you'll get a psycho pick for your awesomeness. Move back down to the sell-bot room now. I would recommend buying the second level for the Kama: the level two abilities are quite good. In any case, head to the right out of the room after buying/not buying. Move up to the top of the platform to fight another Zombie/Soldier wave. Try out your new Kama and see how they work, how easily they dice through zombie flesh. Magic makes this fight go a lot faster if you're having trouble, so make use of it as needed. Afterwards, move on to the next room. As you enter, you can obviously tell what's coming. Boss fight! Skull Tank --- For this fight, the Shift Blade is your friend. The Skull Tank has three primary attacks: a charge attack where he tries to ram in to you, a missile shot from his arm, and a fire breathing attack that deals damage to you if you walk on the ground. The easiest (and safest) way to win the fight is get on top of one of the boxes on either side of the arena. When he tries to ram you, warp directly up so he runs into the grate. Drop back down on top of the box and slash him as many times as you can at point blank range before he moves away. When he moves away and breathes fire on the ground, warp from the top of your box right behind his back and slash him a few more times. Typically he'll get stunned, allowing you to hit him even more. Part of the way through the fight he'll get a prompt over his head, activate it to get some health and deal some extra damage to him. As the fight goes on he'll start to move faster and faster. Don't change up your strategy, just play it safe and he goes down easy. When the fight's done, exit off the right side to finish the level. ==================== E. Nord Trainyard...(NTZ) ==================== Visit the sale-bot if you need anything, then head right and eliminate the errant zombies before continuing. The next screen has a wave of enemies in it consisting of Soldiers and Agents. Eliminate them and continue to the next room. Inside there will be another wave of Soldiers and Agents. Kill them in the time limit to get a psycho pick. Try to lure them to the left side of the room where it's open, the boxes on the right side make killing the Soldiers difficult as they land on the boxes after rappelling instead of the ground. After you've succeeded, head through the door in the upper right corner. Continue through the empty room to the other side. Enter the train car and pick up the key ring, you'll need it later. Picking it up will spawn a wave of Rocket Troopers and Soldiers. The cramped quarters can make fighting the explosive using enemies a hassle, so switch to the Shift Blade to use the warp if you have to. Return to the timer room and go through the door in the lower right corner this time. Head up the middle platform of the next room to find a new enemy: Walker --- These cyborgs are relatively common, especially in later missions. They're easy to kill when they're by themselves and they only represent a threat when they appear with other enemies, so you don't need to worry about them too much. Walkers have two attacks: an upwards missile barrage and a downwards machinegun stream similar to a Soldier's. Both are easily avoidable: the gunfire only hits at near point blank range and the missiles hit ridiculously far away. Anywhere in between and you're invincible. These guys do jump around a lot and they are very mobile, but they shouldn't give you too much trouble. Just kill them like any other enemy. After killing the first Walker, a wave of Soldiers will spawn with a few more walkers in tow. Focus on killing the Walkers first, avoiding the fire from the soldiers by warping. After killing everyone, head out the door at the lower right. The next room has a wave of Soldiers and Agents: like before, stick to the left side of the room so the soldiers can't abuse the boxes for cover. In the next room use the key to open the door, then kill the Zombies and Agents in the room after that one. Head in to the next room to see a boss. Finish whatever preparation you might need to do before jumping down in to the fray. Personally, I'd recommend having an uberfish or two for this fight as it can get pretty tough. Viking Cyborg --- This guy is an absolute monster. He has three different attacks: a charging head but that deals a ton of damage, an axe chop that deals a ton of damage, and a lightning-enhanced Axe chop that deals even more damage. To top it off, Zombies will continually spawn while you're fighting him. Either your Kama or the Shift Blade will work for this fight; choose whichever one you're comfortable with. Your strategy is simple: you need to bait him in to attacking, then dodge behind him and hit him a few times. After he turns around and begins another attack, dodge behind him again and try to attack some more. This strategy has two factors you need to consider in addition to just killing him: the zombies and his attacks. The Zombies can be just as much of a nuisance as the boss is, especially when you're dodging/warping a ton. If being near the boss requires you to kill a zombie then by all means do it, but it's pointless to fight the never ending wave of zombies. The above strategy will also be broken when the boss performs his charge attack, as that requires you to dodge it and get near him again. To tell when he's going to charge, study his movement after an attack: if he stands still for more than half a second without doing anything, he'll probably charge you. Either jump over him or roll out of the way to avoid taking damage, but watch for Zombies when you land. About halfway through the fight a prompt will appear above his head for some extra damage and health, and you'll probably need it. Don't be afraid to use a healing item during this fight either, this guy is one of the harder bosses in the game. Towards the end of the battle he gets a new attack he'll perform almost constantly, a crazy axe swing charge attack that covers a huge area. Try to predict where he'll end and be there to hit him, otherwise stay in the air by repeatedly warping until he' open. After killing him, the mission is over. ==================== F. Drome Rail...(DRZ) ==================== Check the sell-bot to the left for anything you might need, then head right. This level is fairly linear (you are on a train after all), so finding out where to go should never be problem. Just walk right. Head right to fight a wave of enemies. Defeat them and continue a few carts down to see a scene. In the net room you'll see a scene, then fight a new enemy: Assassin --- Assassins are similar to Soldiers, only more close combat oriented. They have both a long knife they use to attack at close range, making use of a few combo attacks, and a gun they'll use at range. Assassins will also jump in to the air, where they'll either swoop down with a knife attack or fire their gun at an angle like a soldier. Thankfully, Assassins have relatively little health compared to other enemies and go down fast, leading to quick and easy kills if you can overwhelm them. When assassins appear, move in close and keep up the pressure with a faster weapon-like the kama- and don't let up. Focus on fighting one at a time, not the entire group, and you'll come out ahead. The wave of enemies in the room consists of some of the new assassins, an Agent, and a Soldier. The tight quarters can make things tough, so use the shift blade and warp away when needed. Defeating them nets you Crusher magic. Crusher Magic attacks the ground around you and has less range than lightning, but it deals more damage. Test it out on the Assassins that drop in to the area. Continue to the next room to find a smaller wave of enemies. Defeat them under the time limit to get a psycho pick. Move to the next room to get trapped in a cage with some soldiers, rocket troops, and agents. As always, remove the rocket troopers first then focus on the soldiers and the agents. Eventually a few assassins will show up; kill them before finishing off whoever is left. The next room has yet another wave of enemies, this time made up of Soldiers, Agents, and Walkers. Eliminate the Agents, then take out the walkers and soldiers. Finally, head to the last room to find the boss: Grande Walker --- After the Viking from last level, this guy should be a snap. He only has a few attacks and all of them are easy to avoid: his main attack is to fire rockets at you, but he'll also try crushing you under foot of you get too close. Pick whatever weapon you want and test out the range of his rockets. See how he only fires them when you're 4-5 body lengths away? You need to lure him in to firing at you, then roll/warp next to him and slash a few times. After a second or two he'll try to step on you, so roll back to the exact same location as before. This will cause him to shoot at you again, and you can repeat the process indefinitely. Eventually you can perform a prompt to take off some extra damage. After this he will occasionally shoot some rockets of that track you. To avoid them, simple equip the shift blade and continually warp away from them until they explode. Then just repeat the pattern like before to finish him off. After beating him, head right to end the level. ==================== G. L'opera Dramatique...(LDZ) ==================== This is a short level, but it can be a hard one. Head right to find a sell-bot, but be aware that you'll have two psycho picks in a couple minutes before you make any purchases. I'd recommend saving at least one of them for the next level though, and I'd also have at least one uberfish for this level, so keep that in mind. Anyway, head to the screen after the sell-bot to fight some agents and walkers. Once they're dead, a guitar will appear on top of the building. As always, beating it earns a psycho pick. After the guitar equip your shift blade and look up. In the upper left corner of the area there should be a gap in the ceiling. Head through it to find a container with a Psycho Pick inside it. After making any possible purchases by backtracking to the sale-bot, head right from the screen with the guitar to enter the opera house. Inside you'll fight a wave of enemies with a new face among them: Freak --- Freaks are the head-honchos among regular enemies in the game. Making use of long Hooks for weapons, Freaks will constantly be moving from the ground to the air, all while wildly swinging their hooks to damage you. In that sense, treat Freaks like beefed up Soldiers. However, Freaks are much more dangerous than most other enemies: they can actually get you into combo attacks. These will remove big chunks off of your life-bar, not a pretty sight. Freaks do have a weakness though. They are very bad defenders: if you can hit them a couple of times to initiate a combo, you can kill them fairly easily. The hard part is moving in and actually hitting them in the first place without getting hit yourself. Pull out all the stops against these guys: magic, health items, and anything you can think of. After defeating the wave, continue in to the opera house. You will eventually come to a stage, where you will be trapped in an arena. You will have to fight a cannon cyborg, the boss from Ivy Trail. Get close to him to make him start an attack, then dodge behind him and attack a few times before repeating. The zombies might complicate things, but you shouldn't have too much trouble if you've kept up with your upgrades. After the Cannon Cyborg, prepare to fight a boss: Pumpkin Head --- Pumpkin head will drop down in to the arena and rev his chainsaw, signaling the start of the match. He's a simple character, his only real attack is to swing his chainsaw and use the occasional jump attack. Don't mistake that for him being easy though: the chainsaw does huge amounts of damage and can kill you in seconds if you aren't careful. To beat him, you're going to have to watch for a certain animation. He will need to rev his chainsaw all throughout the battle: this is your chance to hit him. Get up close and hit him a couple times, then run away to avoid it when it starts again. Really, it's a simple battle. Constantly stay in motion to avoid his attacks, and use healing items as needed. After killing him, you'll get the chainsaw. The Chainsaw is my personal favorite weapon, and it's also probably the best weapon if you're playing on Easy, Normal, or Ninja mode. The chainsaw is incredibly powerful, literally able to kill enemies in a single hit when upgraded. Carve through the enemies in the next room to get a feel for it, it works wonders against both regular bosses and enemies. Head right from the next screen to finish the level. ==================== H. Metatron District...(MDZ) ==================== The level opens on some roof tops. Head straight up for some supplies on another screen, then head back down and to the right for a screen with a sell-bot nearby. If you haven't already, upgrade the chainsaw. At level two, the Up+Y combo is almost an instant kill against most of the enemies in the game. It's terribly slow, but if you knock an enemy down and start while they're on the ground you can kill them before they get up. Anyway, head forward on to the next screen to encounter a wave of enemies. At this point, Soldiers and Agents shouldn't pose a problem for you any more. There are also some Rocket troops mixed in with the others, take them out first to avoid and rockets. After you eliminate the first wave, you'll get access to a new magical ability: a fireball like-shot that travels in an upwards path in front of you. It's incredibly damaging, and will one-shot most of the basic enemies in the game. However, it only hits in front of you in a relatively small area. A wave of baton enemies will appear so you can try it out. Use it once or twice, but then kill them like normal to save your magic. That magic will come in useful for an upcoming fight. Head off to the right to the next area. Remember this area, you'll need to come back here soon enough. Continue right to a vertical passage. Drop down to get ambushed by a boss! Head Chef --- The head Chef is a lot like the masked swordsman from the first level. He's incredibly fast and has a lot of attacks, but his favorite is to jump into the air and toss ninja stars at you. He also likes to jump in to the air and slam down with his cleaver on top of you. This attack is particularly nasty, as he can change his angle and direction in mid-air to hit you when you think you've dodged him. However, you do have an advantage on him: he barely has any health. Your strategy for this fight is similar to the fight against the chainsaw maniac in the last level: dodge a lot and get in strikes when he's stationary. Use your chainsaw and stay on the bottom of the alley, only stopping when he comes down from an aerial slice. You'll only have a short window to hit him in, but using the chainsaw will deal a ton of damage. Only attack when it's safe and you'll avoid most of his attacks, and use the chainsaw for maximum damage. Watch the scene after beating the chef to learn some of the Dishwasher's back story, then head to the right. You'll face some enemies here under a time limit, beat it to get a psycho pick. Head right for another wave of enemies. There are a lot of them here, and you need to be conservative on your use of magic and health loss. Stick to the left side wall to avoid being overrun by them, and take out the enemies as they spawn. As they fall in to the area, prepare a chainsaw strike when they hit the ground for tons of damage. Leave the soldiers for last and focus on the enemies that can't block first, though you can probably leave the rocket trooper for last if you stay against the left wall under his blind spot. After fighting the wave and getting the electrosphere, head back towards the room before the fight with the chef. On the way you'll encounter some enemies, including a new one: Invisible Enemies --- Like it says on the tin. Invisible enemies are just regular enemies with a cloaking field, making them appear as wavy outlines against the background. You try to wildly swing around with a faster weapon, but it's better to lie in wait for them to come to you. Either catch these enemies when they jump down from the air or when they spawn and you can see the traces. They aren't any harder than their regular counterparts, just a little tougher to see. After fighting them open the container halfway up for some supplies, then head left at the very top for a boss. Rocketeer --- This boss is basically a regular rocket trooper on crack. He is incredibly fast and uses it to his advantage for his attacks: a ramming move that launches you across the screen and a barrage of dropped explosives from above. Each one does a ton of damage, so this battle is largely about avoiding his attacks. To defeat him, equip the Shift Blade with the chainsaw is an alternate. Warp to the top of the room and watch how his pattern works: the boss will quickly move at a set height around the middle of the area, dropping bombs. He'll quickly get tired and land to recuperate. Warp next to him and whip out the chainsaw and hit him a few times, then warp away to the top of the area. This strategy can be slow, but it allows you to avoid the brunt of his attacks as well as the soldiers in the area. Rinse and repeat until he's dead. ==================== I. Grace Chapel...(GCZ) ==================== Head right after the level starts to find another sell-bot. Buy whatever- I'd recommend heath if you haven't gotten all of them already- and head to the next screen. Here you'll fight a wave of Assassins along with a few Mechs. The Chainsaw makes short work of them. After killing them, drop down instead of going forward to enter another room. In here, you need to kill a couple of Freaks paired with Cannon Cyborgs. It's sort of funny to think the cannon Cyborgs were hard before: your magic and chainsaw can rip through them in seconds. Open the container that falls down for a key and some recovery items, then head back up and move right. Fall down the long shaft to spawn a wave of enemies. The wave consists of a Frak, a couple of Rocket troops, and a few soldiers. Focus on the Rocket troops first, then carve up the others down below. You will automatically get a psycho pick when you defeat them. Move in to the church when they're dead and use the key to open the door. Move through the empty rooms of the church until you hop on to a raised platform. As the cage drops, prepare yourself: Ninja --- The Ninja uses Kama, just like yours. The Ninja will jump and move around a lot, then dart in quick and try to hit you with a combo attack using his kama. There are two ways to get through this fight, one using the Kama and one using the chainsaw. The win with the kama, you're going to want to stick to the run and gun strategy like in the chef fight: jump in after the ninja lands and hit him a few times before rolling away and getting ready to dodge more attacks. This strategy isn't as safe as the using the chainsaw, but it relies less on chance. Don't attack the Ninja head one with the kama, he has priority over you and can hit through your own attacks. To win with the chainsaw, you're going to want to lure him in to a corner. If you get him in a corner- magic works well-you can continually hit him with the X combo on the chainsaw until he dies. Alternately, lure him in to the corner by waiting for him to attack and dodge out of the way. The chainsaw also works a little better with priority, as it seems to be a bit longer range than is kama. In any case, defeat him to see a scene. Don't put down the controller just yet, you aren't done. Captain Shotgun (See? Because he has a shotgun and a hook for hand...) --- Captain shotgun has three primary attacks: a long range blast with his shotgun that travels along the ground (you can see him prepping it from a mile away, it's slow as hell), a dash with his clawed hand from either in the air or along the ground, and just punching you with his claw. All of his moves are painful, but they're easy to see coming so you shouldn't have much of a problem. Equip the chainsaw if you don't have it out already and back away from him. This should prompt him to fire with the shotgun. As he fires, roll under the shot and slash at him a couple of times before retreating or rolling behind him and slashing some more. This guy has a lot of health, but he's pretty straightforward: just be aware of the shotgun blasts and he's easy. After defeating him open the container for your final weapon, the arsenal. The Arsenal is a really odd weapon, a dual wielded shotgun and uzi. X fires the Uzi, which holds 50 rounds per clip (you have infinite ammo, press B to reload manually) and Y fires the shotgun. It's a lot different from any of your other weapons, and I'd recommend going back to a previous level to get used to it before trying to use it. When you're ready, head right to exit the level. ==================== J. Mono Catacombs...(MCZ) ==================== Head forward to the end of the room and drop down the long shaft. On the way down you'll find a sell-bot if you need one. You will land in a room with two gates, one on the left side and one on the upper-right corner. The goal of the level is to open the upper right gate. Head right to a new room to find a wave of new enemies: Zombie Assassins --- Exclusive to this level, Zombie Assassins are dangerous foes. They're slow, and most of their attacks consist of awkwardly slicing at you with their knife. The danger comes from their kamikaze attacks: these enemies have bombs strapped to them, which they will make use of to kill you at any opportunity. They will typically do this when they've taken a few hits, look for one of two stances: they'll hold up a grenade when they're laying on the ground before they explode, and they'll run towards you with one out front if they're standing up. These do lots of damage, so if you see one RUN AWAY. It isn't worth it to try and kill them before they explode. Other than the kamikaze moves, they're basically just like beefed-up zombies, so take them on like them until they try to explode all over you. Defeat the wave of enemies and continue to the right. Head down the shaft and through the next room. The room after that has a mound of skulls, along with a huge wave of foes. The wave is made up of Rocket Troops, Freaks, Zombie Assassins, and normal zombies. When they appear, go for the Zombie Assassins first before anything else to avoid unnecessary explosions, then the Rocket Troops and the Freaks. Don't bother with the Zombies unless they're in your way. After killing them all, a container will appear with a psycho pick inside of it. Head up the shaft through the left door until you come to the top and move right. You'll be trapped inside a small cage with a Cannon Cyborg. It might seem challenging, but you can make short work of him with the chainsaw and some dodging. After killing another cyborg, open the container for a key. Head right to find yourself back in the room with the gates in it from the start of the level. A wave of enemies will appear here, but they shouldn't be too hard after the last one. You have a lot more room to move around in, so explosions are much easier to avoid. Try to conserve your magic for an upcoming fight that's a lot more challenging than this one. You might want to head back to the sell bot if you're low on health, this next section can get kind of tricky. Head to the upper right corner of the room and move through the tunnel. Unlock the gate at the end and drop down to the next room to land on an elevator. Landing here causes a huge wave of foes to spawn, beginning with Zombie Assassins and Soldiers. Use magic when the place gets too crowded. Eventually, rocket troops will get thrown in to the mix. They're not too much of a threat if there's only one, but if there are any more stop for a moment and take them out. Finally, two Cannon Cyborgs will board the elevator near the top. Take them out with rolls or any magic you might have left to finish the level. ==================== K. Cam Rooftops...(CRZ) ==================== Head right a couple of screens to encounter a wave of Freaks, Rocket Troops, and Agents. The close quarters make the rockets really hard to avoid, so take out the Troops first before going for the others. Continue right to fight a Freak and a Cannon Cyborg on the next screen, then equip the shift blade and warp up through the next few rooms until you reach a door on the side of the building. Enter to see a scene, then get to fighting. The Chef will help you during this fight, which is good when you look at how many enemies you're fighting. The wave consists of Assassins, Freaks, Soldiers and Rocket Troops. It seems like a lot, but in all honestly you could sit this fight out and let the Chef do all the work of you really want to. After the fight watch the other scene and head outside to the right. Buy something if you want, then go through the door at the top of the room to fight two Pumpkin Head Chainsaw maniacs. Give them a taste of their own medicine; the chainsaw carves through these guys. Make use of the table in the middle to set up attacks, make them come to you. Hit them with magic and your own weapons when they have to rev theirs, and focus on one of them at a time to make the fight easier. Fighting one of them who has full health is infinitely easier than two of them at once no matter how much health they have. Head out to left side after you're done and move up. Open the container for a psycho pick and move to the next room to the right, which contains a psycho pick-giving guitar. Finally, move to the next area and get ready for the boss: Titan --- Somewhat resembling the bastard child of the Grande Walker from the train and the Viking, the Titan has similar attacks. It fires rockets into the ground at you and attempts to crush you under foot of you get too close. However, it does have one new and very nasty attack: it will raise its hand in the air and call down a lighting bolt in front of it, dealing a ton of damage if you get hit. Your strategy is a simply a more mobile version of the train fight against the Grande Walker: lure the boss into either firing rockets or summoning lightning, then run up and hit it. In the case of lighting you'll need to dodge behind him instead to avoid the attack. When he tries to stomp on you, dodge away and try to repeat the pattern once more. Once you've "killed" the boss, approach him and complete the prompt. The fight isn't over yet. Now in free fall, the Titan has to resort to firing rockets and summoning lightning. As the second part of the fight starts quickly equip the shift blade and warp next to the boss, hitting him four times (listen for the Dishwasher's voice). Then warp away. If done correctly, he will have charged and missed a lighting attack and have begun charging a new one. Repeat the same process, waroping in and hitting him four times then warping away. This should put him in a permanent loop of charging and missing, allowing you to kill him without much loss of health. ==================== L. Cam Lobby...(CLZ) ==================== You might want to have a few healing items ready for this mission. As the level starts you'll be in free fall. Steer yourself to the left side of the screen to eventually fall on a platform with a container and a psycho pick. After grabbing them continue downward. Once you've landed, get ready for a huge fight: this level is one, long fight made up of four different waves of enemies. Wave 1: Freaks/Cannon Cyborgs Ignore the Freaks while you dodge the Cannon Cyborg's arm attacks and hit them from behind. After the cannon Cyborgs are dead, Kill the Freaks. Wave 2: Freaks/Walkers Freaks will now come paired with Walkers. Basically, kill anything that gets close to you and don't stop attacking. None of these enemies really need to be killed before any of the others; so focus on dodging attacks and staying alive instead of going after specific enemies. Wave 3: Soldiers/Grande Walker Ugh. Focus in the Grande Walker until he's dead. He poses the greatest threat, but the annoying soldiers will get in the way too. Don't kill the soldiers while the walker's around, just knock them away so they're out of range. Wave 4: Soldiers/Viking/Rocketeer The final wave has two former bosses in it, and it's the hardest of all of them. Use any of your remaining magic on the Viking and the Rocketeer, then focus on killing the Viking. Use the chainsaw for maximum damage and carve him up while the Rocketeer is in the air. When the Rocketeer lands, focus on him until he gets back up and flies around some more. Then go after the Viking again, repeat the process until someone's dead. During this portion, ignore the soldiers pretty much no matter what. The other enemies can flatten you, so don't even bother with them. After finishing the last wave, head right to finish the mission. ==================== M. In Processing...(IPZ) ==================== This is the last enemy-intensive level in the game, and as such you can expect the game to pull no punches in your encounters. You will fight huge waves of Freaks, repeat boss fights, and fight waves with every single enemy from the game. If this is too hard for you right now, go do some other levels and come back with some healing items, get any psycho picks you might have missed, etc. When the level starts, head right a couple screens for your first wave. It's mostly soldiers and freaks, but there will be a few Rocket Troopers and Cannon Cyborgs near the end of the Wave. As usual, take them out first. (As a side note, you'll probably get the "And you will know us..." achievement during this level if you've been brutally killing Freaks.) As you head to the next room, equip your Shift Blade. This room has a wave of Assassins paired with an obscene number of Rocket Troopers. Take down the rocket Troopers then go for the Assassins. Open the crate for some goodies, then continue through the upper right door. Remember this room for later. Head Through the next few rooms to find a sell-bot, purchase as per your need. The next room holds a time trial, complete it to get a psycho pick. At the Top of the room you'll find two doors. It doesn't matter which one you enter first, but I'm going left first. Upon entering a larger room, two Captain Shotgun enemies will appear. These guys are brutal when they're backing each other up, but easy to kill when they separate: dodge until they get far enough away from each other, then go in for the kill. The Chainsaw works great here, as it will, often stun them before they can attack. After they die, watch out for their final shot as their body falls to the ground. Open the container that appears after they die for an electroshpere, then head to the room on the right side of the split path. This room has a few waves of Invisible Freaks. If you have enough magic this fight should be quite easy, as most magic drains them down to near nothing and removes the invisibility. Otherwise, you might have a hard time. I'd recommend fighting on the highest level of the area to avoid sneak attacks: fight with your back to the wall and make them come to you, which makes them easy to see and defend against. After killing them, grab the container with the second electroshpere. Remember that room with the Assassins and Rocket Troops? Head bacl there and go through the door in the lower right corner. After traversing a few rooms, you'll come to two rooms with electric barriers in them. After blasting through the barriers, you'll come to the final room with the boss: Cyborg Scientist --- The Scientist Himself isn't much a threat: he throws explosives at you and has a few easy to dodge physical attacks. It's the fact that he'll constantly summon all manner of other enemies into the room to fight against you that makes him difficult. Put on your tunnel vision and aim straight for him: the enemies are infinite and killing them will only bring about more. During this fight, magic is your friend: it can help you weaken (but not kill) the enemies on-screen, leaving the scientists largely defenseless. As for the scientist himself, he's easy. Just get in close and pound away with a powerful weapon. He gets stunned pretty easily, so you can deal a lot of damage really fast. Once the Scientist is dead, head to the final level. ==================== N. Cam Core...(CCZ) ==================== The final showdown. Right when the level starts, warp straight up to find a room with a psycho pick in it with some other items. Head back down and move right through the next few rooms. Buy at least one uberfish from the sell-bot, you'll need it. Enter the main computer room for a boss fight: Sinthesis --- The computer system is slow, but it has a lot of health and very damaging attacks. Sinthesis has three primary attacks: a sort of whip like physical move with its cords that covers a lot of ground, a lighting attack that travels along the ground after a short charge, and a trio of lighting balls that will track you as you move. Your window for attack is during those charge times: stand in front in synthesis. If it begins to charge a lighting attack, dodge behind it and hit it a few times. If you see that the attack is the lightning bolt, keep attacking since you're safe. If it's the lightning ball attack, immediately jump away from synthesis and dodge the balls. The process is a little slow, but it's the best way to take down the boss with a minimal loss of life. After all, it isn't the last boss of the level... Head right across a few more rooms after defeating Sinthesis to come to a large computer room. Watch the scene and get ready for another fight... The Fallen Engineer --- The Fallen Engineer is the Masked Rider from way back in the first level, and he actually fights quite a bit like you do. He jumps around a lot and is very mobile, but he has quite a few nasty combo attacks that he'll perform on the ground. In the air he'll either do a ground pound move with a lightning chaser or send out tons of the little electric orbs like the previous boss did. The fight is all about finding a little tiny opening in his attacks: he gets stunned pretty easily, but stunning him is hard during all of the chaos. Try to get him after a jump attack or a combo move, but make sure you don't approach him in the air. He has complete air superiority over you, so you're just going to get knocked back down. Partway through the fight you'll get a prompt: take it for some extra damage and health. To put him down for good, you'll need to do one last prompt to chop his arms off and decapitate him, ending him once and for all. Hybrid Redux --- I lied. The boss is back with a vengeance, combining the worst parts of the last two fights. He has all the projectile attacks of both bosses, as well as the range of synthesis and the speed of the engineer. Thankfully, he does have a weakness: his attacks take a moment to start up. They're fast once they're out, but before he attacks you have a tiny little window to attack him in. This is especially useful during his cable sweep attack, as you can stun him before he gets going and continue to attack. About halfway through the battle you'll get a prompt and a scene, which will change two things. The boss will gain a projectile attack that shoots about 30 lightning balls: this can wipe out most of your health bar in a single hit, so switch to the shift blade if you see him charging lightning. However, you also get a bonus...the Chef is Back! The Chef will help you finish the last half of the bosses health. If you were a coward, you could hang back an let him do all the work. But you're not a coward, are you? Double team the Engineer to take him down for good. Finish the final prompt to kill the boss and end the game. Congratulations, you've beaten the game! As a reward, you'll receive a piece of clothing that will be added onto the Dishwasher's costume. What it is depend on the level, so you'll have to play through the game a few more times to see them all. You'll also unlock Samurai difficulty (assuming you beat the game on normal or ninja mode). Samurai mode contains the last three psycho picks, but it's also brutally difficult so have fun! ============================== 5. Psycho Picks...(PP5) ============================== This section details the location of all the psycho picks in the game by level, including the samurai difficulty-exclusive ones. A. Foghorn Cafe 1. There is a time trial to left of the first room in the game, To activate it, move right in the level until your first fight, then back track to behind the first room. B. Ivy Trail 2. There is a time trial near the beginning of the level. Hard to miss. C. Gray Fortress 3. After the room containing Jetpack troops and Soldiers, head to the right side to find it in an alcove. D. St. Crux Cemetery 4. There is a Guitar near the first sell-bot. Move up the passage with the Shift Blade to find it at the top. E. Nord Trainyard 5. There is a time trial when you first enter the warehouse. You can't miss it. F. Drome Rail 6. There is a time trial in the room after you get Crusher dish magic. Can't miss it. 7. *SAMURAI DIFFICULTY ONLY* A Guitar will appear on the last room of the train before the boss after you clear out the enemies. G. L'Opera Dramatique 8. After you clear out the enemies at the entrance to the Opera house, a guitar will appear on top of the building. 9. Directly up from the guitar, there is a gap in the ceiling that leads to a secret room with a Container in it with a psycho pick. 10. *SAMURAI DIFFICULTY ONLY* A Guitar will appear in the last room of the level (with the Zombies) after you eliminate the enemies. H. Metatron District 11. After the fight with the Chef, there is a time trial in the next room. You an't miss it. I. Grace Chapel 12. You will automatically get this pick when you defeat the enemies outside of the main chapel door. J. Mono Catacombs 13. Similarly, this pick is automatically gained after clearing out a room of enemies. K. Cam Rooftops 14. This pick will appear after you clear out the third "conference room" full of enemies. You can't miss it. 15. In the last room before the boss, a guitar will appear. L. Cam Lobby 16. As the level starts, move to left side of the screen to fall on a small platform with a container on it that has a psycho pick. M. In Processing 17. Right after the room with the sell-bot, there will be a time trial. You can't miss it. 18. *SAMURAI DIFFICULTY ONLY* A guitar will appear near the room where you get the two electrospheres. N. Cam Core 19. There is a secret room directly above the start of the level. ============================== 6. Closing...(CL6) ============================== This guide is my property, and you are only being allowed to use it. As such, I must insist that you not use this guide for any personal gain or profit off of it in any way. You are free to use this guide as you see fit as long as it comes within those confines: you may print it, make a hat out of the pages, or create some pleasant origami. I don't care as long as I maintain ownership of this guide. Do not distribute it without my permission, but if you would like it on your website feel free to contact me at email@example.com and I will more than likely allow it. I hope this guide has been useful, and I thank you for reading it. This guide, like all of my guides, is dedicated to cats. I'd also like to commend James Silva, the creator of the game, for a fantastic example of a game made by a single person. Copyright Woody Crobar, May 19 2009.
View in:


text:
AURORA, Colo. (CBS4) – There are some incredible people giving the gift of life in Colorado. They really are unsung heroes in the community — they work 24/7, 365 days a year, each day showing their care, commitment and devotion to little bundles of joy who are fighting for their lives.
Tubes in their noses, wires taped to their chests and surrounded by machines. It's hardly how the little ones and their parents planned on spending the holidays. But the babies all have a fighting chance thanks to the amazing care in the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit (NICU) at The Children's Hospital.
"We have everything from patients who are very critically ill and we have to do everything for them and for patients who aren't as sick we're supporting their families to help teach them how to care for their child; teaching them how to feed them, teaching them how to give any complex care that they may need," NICU nurse Katie Hamilton said.
Without the nurses the families may lose what's most precious to them.
"I think it's just one of those things you just do when you take the time at the end of the day or periodically time to reflect on that, but it can be kind of overwhelming to think about what we actually do and how much responsibility we have for tiny little lives," Hamilton said.
Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Year's — morning, noon, or night — the devoted team is there to help.
Gloria Bencze has been at Children's for 35 years.
"The babies are what I've always wanted to do. I can't imagine any other area of nursing that I'd want to work in," Bencze said.
For parents, the trying times are made much easier thanks to the loving hands of the NICU team.
"The care team is wonderful; the doctors, the nurses, the therapists take wonderful care of our son," a mother told CBS4.
"They are so supportive and always have a smile on their face sometimes when I need one, I love them," another mother said.
CBS4's Ed Greene knows first-hand just how truly wonderful the NICU people are. Over 30 years ago he did a story on a little girl named Allison — -Greene's daughter.
"That's right. Over 30 years ago they helped out my little girl.. If you have a little something extra, you may want to think about helping out Children's Hospital," Greene said.
Those who would like to make a donation should visit The Children's Hospital website.

subset: commoncrawl


text:
The Rick Tocchet gambling-ring saga has come as a shock to the Maple Leafs, but they don't necessarily agree that it will sully the reputation of the National Hockey League.
Though the Tocchet story has dominated the past couple of days, the Leafs believe the NHL can get past it without long-term damage to the game's image. There is the idea this will set the game back in a year when there has been positive publicity after the 2004-05 season was lost because of the lockout.
"I don't think it will hurt the game in an overall sense," centre Jason Allison said. "It has nothing to do with the product or the entertainment we're providing. It might be a big deal for the people involved, but I don't think it will be a big deal for the fans. The fans aren't going to (stop attending games) because a couple of guys had a gambling problem."
Still, the alleged involvement of Wayne Gretzky's wife, Janet Jones, who is said to have placed bets, surprised the Leafs.
"It's kind of stunning considering his wife was named," Wade Belak said. "Who knows? Hopefully nothing comes out of this."
Not all of the Leafs were comfortable discussing the Tocchet story. Darcy Tucker said it was "unfortunate what happened" but was adamant he would answer no more questions on the subject.
"Some guys play cards, that's the way it is," Tucker said before clamming up.
Coach Pat Quinn also was not prepared to go into any length on the subject.
"I am only going off the news," Quinn said. "It was a surprise for everybody. I really don't have a comment on this because I don't know anything about it. It is a league issue and that is where it is going to lie. It would not be appropriate for me to say anything."
Quinn, who will coach Team Canada at the Olympics, also refused to say whether he thought the issue would become a black cloud for Canada at the Olympics, given Gretzky's involvement with the team.
One matter the players were clear on was the NHL's warnings and guidance regarding gambling.
"We do have meetings about the rules and all that stuff, and to stay away from gambling in general," captain Mats Sundin said. "I don't think there is an issue of guys knowing what is legal and what is not. It is pretty clear."
Said Belak: "(The NHL) does not want you to get involved with the wrong kind of people (such as) bookies. I don't think our sport is a huge money draw as far as gambling goes."
No matter the outcome, the story has brought attention to the NHL, especially in the U.S.
"I don't know if it brings a black eye, but any bad press is not going to be good," Belak said. "Maybe this is what we need in the U.S., the publicity. I don't know if it's great publicity."


text:
Active Tags
Click tags to the right to narrow your search. Unclick tags to remove.
The Lord of the Manor— Young maid serves her master in his bed.
Desires Opening— A night when Master opens my desires.
A Letter To My Dad Ch. 2— Shes visits with her grandpa.
Please, separate your tags with comma: anal orgasm, oral sex.
Read the Literotica Story Tag FAQ for more information on these tags.


text:
hello my name is vanessa and i'm studying pedagogy in english here in chile. I am doing my practicum in a school for
adults so it´s quite different compares with the formal school. I need to do a lesson planning about past simple,
but i don't know what to do =( who could help me please I'm in a crossroad :'(
English Teacher


text:
Maui Babe AFTER Browning Lotion
8 reviews
87% would repurchase
Package Quality: 3.9
Price: $$
Package Quality: 3.9
Price: $$
Where to Buy
- When you make a purchase through these links, we may receive a commission from the eBay Partner Network or other affiliates.
Start your review
on 6/18/2013 2:08:00 PM
Age: 25-29
Skin: Combination, Fair-Medium, Neutral
Hair: Blond, Straight, Fine
Eyes: Green
Applied religiously along with aloe since my sunburn first showed up. It's definitely moisturizing, but I still ended up peeling. I think if the sunburn is bad enough, there's just no stopping the peeling stage. The skin is dead and has to be sloughed off. I also am not a fan of the scent nor the price tag. I expected something nutty or tropical, but instead it smells 'granny'.
on 5/19/2013 9:07:00 PM
Age: 19-24
Skin: Combination, Fair-Medium, Warm
Hair: Black, Wavy, Fine
Eyes: Green
I did a google search for after tanning lotions because I tan in tanning beds and I want something to replenish the things tanning takes out of my skin and I wanted something to extend my tan also but I didn't want to buy one at my salon for a ridiculous price. The Maui Babe After Browning Lotion had amazing reviews all 4 and 5 stars so I figured I'd give it a shot. The price isn't amazing but my Ulta has it $2 cheaper and I used a 20% off coupon so I got it for $9 something. A little goes a very long way. Its a little sticky at first but it doesn't last long luckily because I absolutely cannot stand lotions that feel sticky or heavy. After a few minutes it absorbs into the skin and leaves you feeling sooo soft. I can't stop rubbing my arm or leg after I use this because it really makes my skin so soft! I definitely recommend and will buy again when I run out.
on 6/2/2009 11:44:00 PM
Age: 19-24
Skin: Combination, Other, Not Sure
Hair: Brunette, Other, Other
Eyes: Blue
I can't believe there is hardly any reviews for this stuff! (i'v never tried the after lotion but i will def try it soon) I found Maui Babe browning lotion in Ulta last summer and bought it on whim! i just thought it looked cool! ( i love finding cult-status products that alot of people dont know about!) anyways it's awsome, i'm naturally fair and never tan on my own so when i use this i get a nice bronzey glow! i LOVE the smell, so yummy!, it's a littttttlee sticky at first but it doesn't bother me.
on 7/12/2009 5:44:00 PM
Age: 19-24
Skin: Combination, Medium, Not Sure
Hair: Blond, Straight, Fine
Eyes: Blue
Best browning lotion ever. Last summer I used the outdoor browning lotion in tanning beds and holy crap it worked amazingly! Everywhere I went people were complimenting me on my tan. The one for outdoor tanning is $13.99
This summer they now sell one for indoor tanning for $28. I am going to get the one meant for indoor tanning. I stopped using the outdoor browning lotion at the tanning salons because it has light mineral oil in it, which is bad for the acrylic beds. I am so excited to get the one for indoor tanning because I have not been as tan since last summer when I used the browning lotion!
on 7/12/2010 7:27:00 PM
Age: 19-24
Skin: Combination, Fair, Not Sure
Hair: Brunette, Other, Other
Eyes: Blue
LOVE THIS STUFF. My mom brought it home with her after her Hawaii trip, and this stuff has done wonders. Took away my burn, and redness all in a nights sleep. I will be VERY sad when I run out of this stuff!
on 7/26/2011 4:23:00 PM
Age: 30-35
Skin: Normal, Fair-Medium, Not Sure
Hair: Brown, Other, Other
Eyes: Blue
I have been using this since last summer and I love it! Greatly compliments the Browning lotion... The scent doesnt linger too long and I never PEAL! I also use this in the winter to keep my skin from getting dry.
on 9/8/2008 5:14:00 PM
Age: 30-35
Skin: Combination, Fair, Cool
Hair: Blond, Straight, Fine
Eyes: Blue
Even though I use sunblock religiously, I'm very fair and tend to burn easily. On a recent trip to Kauai, Hawaii, I re-discovered Maui Babe After Browning Lotion after a marathon snorkeling session and subsequent sunburn (ouch!).
In my (somewhat long) relationship with sunburns, I've found that pure aloe (straight from the leaf--not that Banana Boat green goop) works best at soothing the pain and moisturizing, but Maui Babe does just about as good of a job without staining my skin or clothes and a MUCH more pleasant scent. My sun and wind burned skin soaked this right up and it did help heal the burn faster and reduce peeling.
It's lightweight and feels really good after it's applied; just be sure to rub it in completely. The scent is more of a fresh scent--it's hard to describe, but it's not unpleasant. I can't say that it's extended my tan, but I like it a lot as an after-sun lotion to add moisture and help the healing process.
I've seen this at ULTA and in Hawaii for about $11-$13, which isn't bad for an 8 oz. bottle. From now on I'll probably keep a bottle in my beach bag.
on 4/12/2009 9:36:00 PM
Age: 19-24
Skin: Normal, Fair-Medium, Not Sure
Hair: Brunette, Other, Other
Eyes: Blue
I LOVE EVERYTHING FROM MAUI BABE!!!!!!!!!!! The whole entire line is absolutely incredible! I can't believe there aren't more reviews on Maui Babe...although I know not too many people have heard of the line! It's straight from Hawaii & the browning lotion (indoor & outdoor), after browning lotion, & the spf lotion are AMAZING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! They smell great & give you long lasting color & moisturized skin! Definitely recommend to everyone (whether you're laying out by the pool in your backyard or at the beach)!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! TRY IT!!! :)
Popular Lotions / Creams
1277 Reviews
493 Reviews
130 Reviews
1331 Reviews
653 Reviews
31 Reviews
Where to Buy
- When you make a purchase through these links, we may receive a commission from the eBay Partner Network or other affiliates.


text:
Borbonese shoulder bag in pale pink graffiti with zip
€ 168,00
Borbonese shoulder bag in pale pink graffiti with zip
Product code: 903595 320 312
Availability: Out of stock
Regular Price: €280.00
Special Price €168.00
Borbonese medium shoulder bag in pale pink graffiti with adjustabe handle and buckle with pale pink leather borders. Golden rivets and hardware with logo. Fabric lining with zipped pocket and double opened pocket.
Borbonese bag characteristics:
- Zip fastening.
- Dimensions 28x35,5x16.
- Credit Card
- PayPal
- Postepay
- Bank transfer
- Cash on delivery (Italy only)
In Italy SHIPPING and RETURN ARE FREE, delivery in 2/3 working days.
For Europe and rest of the World click here
Need an advice? Request more information on this product, we are happy to help!


text:
The Montreal Canadiens had better hope history does not repeat itself.
Ten years after the Habs sent disgruntled Patrick Roy to the Colorado Avalanche, the Canadiens yesterday shipped struggling goaltender Jose Theodore to the Mile High City last night.
Roy, of course, went on to lead the Avs to a pair of Stanley Cup victories, leaving Canadiens fans livid at the move.
Avs general manager Pierre Lacroix, the man who engineered the Roy deal, is banking that a similar change of scenery might help Theodore regain the form that made him the Hart Trophy winner as the NHL's MVP back in 2001-02.
"Our entire hockey staff is very excited about the addition of Jose Theodore," Lacroix said. "With this acquisition we are convinced that we are securing our goaltending position for many years."
Getting out of Montreal might be the best thing for Theodore, who is out until the end of this month with a fractured bone in his right heel. Theodore's rocky performance this season had some Montreal tabloids suggesting it was time to go.
"We just lost a big part of our team," Habs captain Saku Koivu said.
Theodore, who makes $4.5 million US this season, had a lofty goals-against average of 3.46.
Aebischer is expected to spot Cristobal Huet, who has been the Habs' No. 1 goalie for more than a month.
"I'm looking forward to a new challenge," he said.
There was speculation in Montreal last night that the deal opened up cap space for further moves. It is known that the Habs, Ottawa Senators and Philadelphia Flyers have interest in the Vancouver Canucks' Todd Bertuzzi, who is scheduled to earn $5.5 million next season.
Heading into today's 3 p.m. trade deadline, Ed Belfour, Dwayne Roloson and Curtis Joseph figured to be the most likely goalies to be moved, not Theodore and Aebischer.
In Roloson's case, the speculation proved correct as he was acquired by the Edmonton Oilers yesterday from the Minnesota Wild. Oilers general manager Kevin Lowe also was interested in Cujo and Belfour, but in the end felt he got the man he wanted.
"Sure it's pressure but I welcome it," Roloson said.
With Ottawa, Tampa and Vancouver still looking to shore up their goaltending, Cujo and the Eagle still could be dealt. There were reports last night the Lightning were working on a deal for Anaheim's J-S Giguere.
In other deals, the Los Angeles Kings landed Brent Sopel and Mark Parrish from the New York Islanders while superpest Ville Nieminen went from the Rangers to San Jose.
Candidates to move today include Washington defenceman Brendan Witt, Florida forward Olli Jokinen and St. Louis defenceman Eric Weinrich.


text:
(Oil lamp by Parsimonious, potted plant by Ohbehave, other somewhat repetitive deco by Maxis and me.)
Category: Hobbies -> Knowledge
Cost: $600 (wall version), $650 (standing version)
Poly Count:
EPs Required: None – base game compatible (BG version)
Sometimes when I'm watching a film or a tv show, I come across something I know I'll just have to make for the Sims. That's what happened when I spotted Kirk's black-and-chrome bookcase/display case in The Wrath of Khan – the thing was just screaming to be Simmified. So I did. 😉
Kirk's TWOK Bookcase is a two-tile bookcase with thirteen slots – three on the top shelf, five on the middle shelf and five on the bottom shelf – where you can place things like deco, lamps and small electronics. As usual, you cycle through the slots with the M key on your keyboard.
The bookcase comes with three recolours for the frame and four for the stand:
It's much more apparent in game than in the screenshots, but the frame recols are all really really shiny. Really. 🙂
But wait, there's more! I made a wall-mounted version as well, just because. 🙂 It's slightly smaller than the standing one (but still two-tile) and therefore it "only" has nine slots – 3+5+1. It can be shifted up and down on the wall if you have Apartment Life (and get the FT version); just be aware that the animations for when the Sim retrieves or puts away a book won't match the shelf height if you do.
Now, there are two variations of these bookcases: a repository variation where the wall bookcase is slaved to the standing one (i.e. gets its textures from the standing bookcase), and a stand-alone variation where the bookcases are independent of each other and both have their individual textures. Both versions use the same GUIDs, though, so only download one of them!
But don't worry, it gets worse. 😉
The .zip files below each contain two folders, one called "TWOK Bookcases BG" and another called "TWOK Bookcases FT".
Only keep one folder! Which one you should keep depends on which expansion packs you have installed:
- If you have Free Time or Apartment Life installed, then keep the "TWOK Bookcases FT" folder and delete the other one.
- If you DON'T have Free Time or Apartment Life installed, then keep the "TWOK Bookcases BG" folder and delete the other one – even if you have any and all other EPs.
(If you don't have FT/AL, but keep those versions of the bookcases in, then your game WILL crash. On the other hand, if you have FT/AL but keep the base-game versions, nothing will crash, but you'll only get the base-game menus for studying and not the expanded Free Time ones.)
The .zip files also include a file called INSTALLATION.txt with the above instructions, just in case.


text:
My Wii Nunchuk Is Sticking, Now What?
Over the weekend I started having a problem with my Nintendo Wii. My game of choice recently has been "THE BIGS" a 2K Sports baseball game that my brother-in-law and sister-in-law gave me for my birthday back in July (Thanks!). I have really enjoyed the game (review coming soon), but the game itself requires pretty heavy use of the Wiimote tethered Nunchuk in several movements and aspects of the game.
Heavy use means a good amount of pressure, whether running for the ball or trying to make your way around the base paths. Then yesterday, my Wii Nunchuk started to have an issue.
While pitching, all of a sudden the Nunchuk appeared to only go down and to the right as if the analog stick was depressed. I shook it around and rotated the analog stick, but could only even with in the upper most top left area could only get it to recenter. It appeared that the Nunchuk was stuck. Only by unplugging the Nunchuck could I get it to recenter.
Then, after another 10 minutes of playing the same thing happened again. Not sure why, but it appears the Nunchuk is ending it's useful life. I did some Google searching, but could not find any recent incidents that could help me out with a potential fix.
Most likely I will be taking the Wiimote Nunchuk through the entire disassemble process to see what the issue is. Have you had such and issue with your Nunchuk? Were you able to fix it or can you help me out?


text:
One would think that with Jen Lancaster's impressive list of best-selling self-improvement memoirs - Bitter Is the New Black; Bright Lights, Big Ass; Such a Pretty Fat; Pretty in Plaid; My Fair Lazy; and Jeneration X - that she would have it all together by now.
One would be wrong.
Jen's still a little rough around the edges. Suffice it to say, she's no Martha Stewart. And that is exactly why Jen is going to Martha up and live her life according to the advice of America's overachieving older sister - the woman who turns lemons into lavender-infused lemonade.
By immersing herself in Martha's media empire, Jen will embark on a yearlong quest to take herself, her house, her husband (and maybe even her pets) to the next level - from closet organization to craft making, from party planning to kitchen prep.
Maybe Jen can go four days without giving herself food poisoning if she follows Martha's dictates on proper storage.... Maybe she can grow closer to her girlfriends by taking up their boring-ass hobbies like knitting and sewing.... Maybe she can finally rid her workout clothes of meatball stains by using Martha's laundry tips.... Maybe she can create a more meaningful anniversary celebration than just getting drunk in the pool with her husband.... again. And maybe, just maybe, she'll discover that the key to happiness does, in fact, lie in Martha's perfectly arranged cupboards and artfully displayed charcuterie platters.
Or maybe not.
©2013 Jen Lancaster (P)2013 Penguin Audio
"Not as light as previous books, still witty"
I have been a fan of Jen Lancaster for years and enjoyed her body of work as a whole immensely. She speaks to many of the same experiences and lessons and mistakes so many women of our generation are having. I love her sarcastic wit and ability to winnow out the absurd in the midst of the seemingly ordinary.
The Tao of Martha isn't as light as her previous work and with good reason....she was facing the serious illness and impending loss of her beloved dog, Maisie. The cloud of heartbreak is felt ever so slightly throughout this book....at least for those of us who both have dogs we've loved that much and who read the early books and know how important Maisie was. However, I am glad to have been along with Jen & Fletch for this step, glitter and all and have now pre-ordered the Audio version of "I Regret Nothing".
"Funny & entertaining"
I laughed, I cried, I enjoyed. On to Jen's next book! I love this author.
I loved this book and the author's narration!
There were so many relatable instances that I repeatedly saved snippets and sent to friends. You know a story is good when you don't want it to end and cry when it does. I have sent this audible link to my daughter who will love listening as much as I did. Keep it up, Jen! Bravo:)
"THIS! THIS is both witty and inspiring!"
This book is everything I expected from my favorite author, Jen Lancaster. I could identify with so many details, it was like she was writing about me. Both laugh out loud funny and warmly heartfelt, this book actually inspires me to 'be awesome, give awesome and get awesome.' My only regret is that it's over!
Being a JL fan, I regret to admit that I fell off the boat and was behind in buying her audiobooks. I reciting idea it and began with this one which is classic Jen. I howled laughing and I cried listening to this. Being a mommy to feline furbabies, I could so relate to several chapters in her book. The struggle is real, y'all. Very entertaining and a hilarious read/listen. Maxie's Tao is my new mantra. I need it on a t-shirt.
"Jen can make me laugh"
Loved that Jen read Her own story which had so many recognizable situations from my own world. She makes me laugh. We need more laughter and honesty.
"Second one!"
I have laughed and cried a little listening to this book! Absolutely related to it on so many levels! Can't wait to get another of Jen's books!!!
"Always wonderful "
I love the memoirs the best! Jen really had a talent telling stories about her life. I always enjoy them.
I'm so disappointed, maybe because I've always enjoyed this author's books, but not this one. Her voice is pretty annoying to listen to for more than just a few minutes at a time. I regret wasting a credit on this one.
Someone who enjoys hearing the author whine about her life, knock Halloween, and curse in odd places will like this book.
I'm looking forward to something that will take me somewhere I haven't been, teach me something or make me laugh out loud. I'm going to listen to Lean In, by Sheryl Sandberg.
First of all, it was not funny and that was my expectation, I thought I'd be LOLling at least a few times. It was like listening to someone that annoyed you, I was going stop reading it at the 2nd chapter but the book was chosen by a book club friend who is younger than me so I thought I should plug along, stick with it and see what happens. Tell the book club members later what I thought..How can I put this nicely? There are so many other books I should have listened to instead........
Jen Lancaster's book inspired me to write my own book. That is the best thing about this book.
Another book club member shared my feelings about this book, now I feel like I should have stopped my friends before they wasted their money on this book. No one is rushing to talk about it, we haven't had a gathering yet. This is the first time that I feel like asking for my credit back......I wonder if Lancaster's other books are worthwhile but I'm not going to waste my time.
Report Inappropriate Content
If you find this review inappropriate and think it should be removed from our site, let us know. This report will be reviewed by Audible and we will take appropriate action.