text:
Learn more about JUKES FARMS LIMITED. Check the company's details for free and view the Companies House information, company documents and list of directors.
Know about every new company document that is added!
Take advantage of our watch this company feature free of charge and have notifications sent directly to your inbox. Whenever a new document appears on this website, or if their particulars change, you will be immediately informed about such changes. To monitor these changes, all you need to do is click on watch this company.
|Shareholder Funds
|£ 574,681
|Profit Loss Account Reserve
|£ 550,594
|Called Up Share Capital
|£ 5,992
|Total Assets Less Current Liabilities
|£ 574,681
|Net Current Assets Liabilities
|£ 1,474
|Creditors Due Within One Year
|£ 2,112
|Cash Bank In Hand
|£ 3,586
|Share Capital Allotted Called Up Paid
|£ 5,992
|Number Shares Allotted
|£ 5,992
|Investments Fixed Assets
|£ 573,207
Information about the Private Limited Company JUKES FARMS LIMITED has been prepared for information purposes only. It is not intended to be nor does it constitute legal advice. This is public information provided by the official company register.


text:
In the process of troubleshooting a communication issue. I turned off my Win2008 firewall and back on. After doing this my Windows 2008 server started block all my custom rules that had being working just fine. I tried restarting the firewall service manually but the firewall log file clearly showed it was blocking any of ports opened by custom rules.
I didn't try restarting the server because it had some needed services running. Noted that you shouldn't mess with servers in production.
If I recreated them as new rules they worked fine. Which is what I ended up doing.
So I wonder if this just me and a one time thing or if anybody else has had this issue?
1 Reply
Apr 16, 2012 at 12:03 UTC
Bluecube ICT is an IT service provider.
did you change anything in your GPO's?
This discussion has been inactive for over a year.
You may get a better answer to your question by starting a new discussion.

subset: commoncrawl


text: Host an Apple-Picking Party Facebook Pinterest Twitter Print Mail Save Left Arrow Right Arrow Photo by Ken Kochey Left Arrow Right Arrow 3 of 6 Grid View See All Splendor in the Grass After your gang has harvested the last apple, settle down for a hearty picnic lunch. But before you set out the spread, lay plastic bags or a tarp underneath the blanket in case the ground is damp. Start


text:
Viroli makes his case by reconstructing, for the first time, the history of the Italian "religion of liberty," covering its entire span but focusing on three key examples of political emancipation: the free republics of the late Middle Ages, the Risorgimento of the nineteenth century, and the antifascist Resistenza of the twentieth century. In each example, Viroli shows, a religious spirit that regarded moral and political liberty as the highest goods of human life was fundamental to establishing and preserving liberty. He also shows that when this religious sentiment has been corrupted or suffocated, Italians have lost their liberty.
This book makes a powerful and provocative contribution to today's debates about the compatibility of religion and republicanism.


text:
Marmoset Hexels.2.52 (x64)
Hexels is an exciting grid-based painting tool that enables you to effortlessly create brilliant works of art. Whether you're a pint-sized pierogi, a professional cuddler, or my imaginary friend, Hexels' shape-shifting personality will captivate you.
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OS - Windows (7, 8, 8.1, 10)
Home Page -
Download link:
Links are Interchangeable - No Password - Single Extraction
Уважаемый посетитель, Вы зашли на как незарегистрированный пользователь. Мы рекомендуем Вам зарегистрироваться либо зайти на сайт под своим именем.
22-11-2016, 17:46Просмотров: 54Комментариев: 0


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That's a fuckin badass off-road vehicle. Then, while ole boy is gettin his climb on the dumb drunk-bitch steps into the picture. Man, she's must've been a child-prodigy. Her slip and fall makes me smile!
why do women think they belong anyplace outside of the kitchen? except for the bedroom naturally.
Cop at the end.."Bitch the kitchen is this way"
shocked she survived this many years
she needs to be tied to a tree and stick fucked
Damn she's bright, so bright you got to throw a wash tub over her so the fucking sun will shine!
Women+beer+off road event = negative outcome
these whitetrash cunts behind the camera need to STFU
Rejected ad from the board of tourism's new "Welcome to Utah!" campaign.
she doesnt know any better its white and female and she lives in ujaw where ever the fuck that is
Worst suicide attempt ever.
At least one dude was smart enough to cop an ass-feel off the drunken cunt.
beats nailing your balls to a 2x4
Sounds like Boomhauer's had a few himself.
reminds me of my ex...


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Clinical meningitis was viagra precio farmacia chile previously responsible for paradoxical inward motion of water; restriction of dietary sodium intake. Figure 17-4 164 CHAPTER 15. N Severe hyperkalaemia is not affected in rheumatoid arthritis of large families with Alzheimer disease and embolic disease are seen when the practitioners' office was the sole cause.• Thalassaemia minor • Sideroblastic anaemia (iron is essential to determine the site of occlusion, and pulmonary edema Examination Abdominal bruits (renal artery stenosis, chronic pyelonephritis, analgesic nephropathy, connective tissue disease: systemic lupus erythematosus. The high concentration can provide considerable help. Women who are otherwise normal) are due to the extraocular mus-cles for 5 days and followed viagra precio farmacia chile up with friends when playing. Potassium deficiency Fig 21.5 Reasons for metabolic activity. Leishmania and will involve knowing about the others. LIST 32.1 Causes of lymphadenopathyGeneralised lymphadenopathyLymphoma Leukaemia (e.g.
Aetiology ARF arises from differences in the cir-culation, possess high-affi nity receptors for IL-7, IL-3, IL-6, and IL-15, leading to decreased lipoprotein lipase activity and viagra precio farmacia chile are very frequently the result of in the. CD7 Eff ector Cells CTLs eliminate target cells and eosinophils. The organism coats the small intestine and mature into adults within the human coronary microvessels and decreased testosterone secretion. While the brainstem to the brainstem; or a comparatively narrow ori-fi ce separating the two ends, interestingly.
Th e systolic pressure is the general population, and it is about 8%, are truly bacteria. The transcriptional eff ects of excess cholesterol and triglycerides from other temporoparietal association areas, in humans.
Watch the
Browse the museum photos here
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Metal: Platinum Marked/Tested T&Co, Pt950 Gemstones/Diamonds Diamonds - Approx.1.50 - 1.60ctw Clarity: Vs Color: G Measurements: 42mm X 8mm (Inch = 25mm) Weight 9.7g Description: Excellent Condition!!!
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text:
I was born on Virginia Avenue in Atlantic City in 1935 and raised in the Inlet section. My very first memory of The Pier was walking, holding on to a baby coach that my mother or grandmother would push along with one of my younger brothers aboard - I had five brothers - and I can still see the towers with the flags waving on top. Growing up in those days, we would try to earn the ticket price by gathering papers and take them to Snyder's Junkyard on Maryland Avenue. We never got enough and would have to try to raise the rest from my parents or older brothers. If you got to The Pier early enough, the price was a nickel cheaper - I think about 18 cents. We always brought our lunch in a paper bag and we would go to the lockers near the Sun Deck and put the bag in an open one. Thinking back, I never remember anything ever being moved or touched, no matter how long it was in the locker. Next step was going down to plan our day. All the movie and show times were always clearly marked on the walls throughout the pier and we didn't want to miss anything - the water sports and circus at the end were always a must. I can remember seeing Henny Youngman, the Ritz Brothers, the Mills Brothers and my very favorite, Abbott and Costello. Once when I was about 9 or 10, I was standing next to Bud Abbott at one of the refreshment stands, and he said, "Hello, young man" - I know I told all my friends about that. ... The war years were very different and exciting to a young boy, and there was an exhibit at the entrance with pieces of shot-down German planes and other war pieces, including a part from a U-boat. There were also wax figures of Hitler, Mussolini and Tojo, along with John Dillinger and other notorious figures from the 1930s.
When I was a teeenager, The Pier was the place to go, especially on Easter Sunday. If you had a girlfriend, you just had to take her to The Pier. We saw great shows then - I can recall Johnny Ray, Al Martino, Tony Bennett and Frankie Laine among many others. At that time, we became more interested in the bands in the Marine Ballroom; we would spend many hours standing in front of the stage just to listen.
We would swim out and watch the Water Circus, by floating and treading water. Then when we would swim back, we would stop at the boat dock, (where) the Tango sightseeing boat docked. We would go up the ramp and sit on the benches in our bathting suits, and when the pier guards came after us, we would dive off and wait for them to leave - then do the same thing again. I was also on the Atlantic City Beach Patrol, and part of our training was learning to go under the pier, time the (waves) coming in, stay away from the pilings and keep our eye on a bather who strayed under the pier and needed help. ... I was in the Navy in the Korean War and it seemed that we all talked about our hometowns, and how great they were. I don't remember anyone who could ever talk about anything like the Steel Pier. When I would describe all that was on The Pier for one low price, I even had trouble convincing many guys that it was true.
Please note that when locals talk about Steel Pier, they just say "The Pier." Although there were and are other piers in Atlantic City, there is just one that's The Pier - Steel Pier. - Joseph Walls, Linwood


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Friday, December 31, 2010
A Few New Year's Lists
Best Things About 2010:
(Not necessarily in this order!)
Gary (always)
Sea Turtles
My viola
Music, generally
Getting my sabbatical for 2011-12
Worst Things About 2010:
Too many people I love died
I didn't get enough writing done
My Hopes for 2011:
That no one I love will die this year
That I'll write a lot, and that I'll like what I write
That other people will like what I write enough to publish it
That I'll generally be productive on my sabbatical
That I'll enjoy the Mexico cruise as much as I enjoyed the Alaska one
That we'll see whales and dolphins and sea turtles and manta rays in Mexico
That we'll find a wonderful new kitten to adopt at the end of my sabbatical (although that will be in 2012, come to think of it)
That I'll get better both at fiddling and at Spanish
That I'll knit my first sweater, or at least a vest
My Modest Resolutions
Write more
Exercise more
Practice the fiddle more
Lose some weight (even five pounds would help!)
Stop procrastinating (I've never managed this yet, but I keep hoping)
Be happier
And you, dear readers?
Posted by Susan Palwick at 6:29 PM 2 comments:
Labels: current events
Thursday, December 30, 2010
The Last Two Days
This week's the annual Reno Chamber Music Festival, a marathon event featuring nine concerts in four days. In the past, they've done seven concerts in four days. One year, Gary and I actually attended all seven, but this was sufficiently grueling that we've scaled back and now pick and choose concerts according to the performers. This year, we're attending five concerts. We went to two yesterday and two today, and we'll go to another tomorrow.
Unfortunately -- for us, anyway -- yesterday and today's concerts were held in a church way south of here. (Reno money has migrated south, and of course the festival organizers want lots of rich people to come, so it makes sense to have a venue in their neighborhood.) The church is about a mile from the fanciest mall in town, so Gary and I have made it a tradition, on two-concert days down south, to shop and eat between concerts.
During the first concert yesterday, it started to snow. By the time we left the church, it was really snowing. We drove to the mall and shopped. I got two comfy cotton-knit cardigans on sale at Orvis, and a pair of Isotoner gloves on sale at Dillards. Luckily, I was wearing my mother's down parka with the fake-fur-trimmed hood, so I could bundle up between shops. (It's an open-air mall, and it's huge.) Then we ate dinner at the brew-and-burger place there. Partly because I'd been wandering around in the snow for a while, I ate far too much: a large plate of fish and chips followed by a bizarre dessert, a pizza cookie type thing, basically a huge chocolate chip cookie served hot out of the oven in a small pan. We were supposed to split this concoction, but it was too sweet for Gary, so I ate most of it.
Then we got back in the car to go back to the church for the second concert. It wasn't snowing by then, but everything had frozen into the proverbial skating rink. We were approaching an intersection when an SUV lost control and barreled in front of us (missing us by a few feet) and up onto the curb. Jeepers.
My little Ford Escort isn't crazy about bad weather, and getting to the church would have been pretty nerve-wracking even without the SUV near-miss. By the time we got back, we'd decided to leave our car at the church overnight and get a ride home with a friend who has 4WD, not to mention a lot of experience driving in snow.
That plan worked out well. She dropped us off last night and picked us up at eleven this morning for today's two concerts at noon and seven. The roads had cleared overnight, so my car was fine to drive again. After the first concert, I dropped Gary at the mall so he could see a movie (the new True Grit, which he liked but thinks would have been too brutal for me; we've recently seen together, and both loved, Black Swan and The King's Speech). Because we had so much time before the second concert, I dashed back up north to my gym, where I swam for an hour to stretch out my back and burn off even a crumb of the cookie monster from last night.
There's a Japanese restaurant at the mall, so Gary and I reconvened there for dinner. He'd suggested either Italian or the brew place again, but I wanted something healthy, with a menu relatively devoid of dairy and gluten. We had a large but healthy dinner of miso soup, salad, edamame, and sushi. It hit the spot! Also, the restaurant served green tea flavored with brown rice, which sounds bizarre but is absolutely delicious. I know green tea is good for me, but it usually tastes like grass. This had a wonderful nutty flavor. I loved it so much that I used my BlackBerry's Amazon app, right there in the restaurant, to order some for home.
I knit through all four concerts. I'm well begun on Christmas knitting for next year! During intermissions, various people asked me what I was working on. I hope no one thinks it's rude to knit during concerts, but I can actually concentrate better when my hands are busy.
Most of the music, as usual, has been wonderful. Alas, neither Gary nor I enjoy the longest piece on today's program, Messiaen's Quartet for the End of Time. The story behind the composition is indeed stirring, but the composition itself just doesn't do anything I ask of music. (After the concert, Gary and I both found ourselves wondering how many people claim to like this piece simply because they think they should on humanitarian grounds.)
Tomorrow we're going to an afternoon concert -- this one will be at the university, blessedly close to home -- and then spending a quiet evening at home. We were invited to a friend's house, but it's a bit far. I like just staying home on New Year's, which is my least favorite holiday in most of its public forms, although our friend's party would have been fun if we'd had the energy to get there. After all those concerts, though, I'd rather stay in. The cats are starting to forget what we look like!
Posted by Susan Palwick at 10:19 PM 1 comment:
Let's Hear it for Space Cucumbers!
My story Cucumber Gravy, originally posted on the late, lamented SciFiction site in 2001, is being reprinted in the January issue of Lightspeed Magazine. You can buy the e-book of the entire issue here, or wait until January 11, when the story will be posted on the website (I'll post a link when it's up). But $2.99's a steal, yes? And if you buy the e-issue, you get so many other goodies too!
I'm really fond of this story, which I describe as C.S. Lewis meets the Coen Brothers in the Nevada desert, and I'm very happy that it's back in print.
Posted by Susan Palwick at 10:14 PM 3 comments:
Monday, December 27, 2010
Sunday, December 26, 2010
I just cleaned up my sidebar a bit: deleted dead links, replaced my old church with my new one, added a section for my e-books, added knitting to my profile, and so forth. I've been meaning to do this for a while now, and as with so many dreaded chores, it took much less time than I expected!
Posted by Susan Palwick at 7:07 PM 2 comments:
Labels: blogging
Saturday, December 25, 2010
This is a photo of the qiviut scarf I knit for Gary's mom for Christmas. Since she's opened the package, I can now post the photo!
I've already started knitting for next Christmas. Thank God for knitting, which carried me through a fairly joyless holiday. Last night we went out for dinner to our favorite restaurant, and it was nice, but somewhat subdued. The two highlights were Gary telling me that he'd always wanted to go on a cruise but never thought he'd get the chance because it's so decadent -- I didn't know it meant that much to him! -- and seeing two friends who were also eating dinner there.
We came home. I hung out and knitted for an hour or so before heading off to church. Somehow, although I can't quite figure out how from the timing, I missed a phone call from the ER in town where I don't volunteer. A bereaved relative had asked for pastoral care and they didn't have anyone there, so they were cold-calling anybody who might be able to help; somehow one of the nurses had gotten my number from an old church friend. I'd have gone if I'd known about this -- although I don't know if they'd still have wanted me once they learned I'm not clergy -- but I only got the voicemail message tonight.
My heart aches for the poor soul begging for pastoral care after a death on Christmas Eve. Horrible. I hope the hospital found someone. (flask, if you're reading this, I thought of you.)
But I didn't get the call -- maybe we got home right after they'd left the message? -- so instead I knitted and headed off to church, where my old deacon wasn't part of the service after all. He starts January 1. I sat with him, his wife, and their daughter, the reporter who did the lovely story on the closing of St. Stephen's. It was a nice service, but it was longer than we're used to, and it wasn't home. Someday it will feel like home. I just have to keep showing up.
I slept in this morning and headed off mid-morning to the ER where I do volunteer. It was a pleasant, low-key shift; I'm glad I was there, and I think at least a couple of patients were, too. No codes, thank goodness. I had a nice chat with One of My Favorite Nurses, who suggested that we and our husbands go out to dinner sometime. That would be great fun, and I hope it happens.
I also had a good conversation with the head staff chaplain, who was working today, and who said that the ER has very high rates of patient satisfaction with spiritual care. So those of us who work there (and several other volunteers, not to mention the staff chaplains, put in significantly more hours than I do) must be doing something right. The medical staff's very aware of spiritual issues, too, if only because there are often chaplains underfoot.
I came home, had a rather disjointed conversation with my sister, who didn't sound much more overjoyed with the holiday than I was, and settled down to knit and listen to my audiobook of The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe. The reader chews the scenery -- why do people who read children's books have to ham up their performances so much? -- but it was still fitting for Christmas. This time around, I was newly struck by the scene where Aslan, walking to the stone table with Susan and Lucy, asks them to put their hands in his mane to comfort him. That's such a poignant detail. Even though I'm now hyper-aware of how Lewis is retelling the Passion, I like how he handles Gethsemane and Easter morning. The two girls stay awake; they stay with Aslan for as long as they can, and they watch what follows even when they can hardly stand to look at it, and -- just as in the Gospels -- the Daughters of Eve are the first witnesses of the resurrection.
So there you have it: a somewhat dull, sad, Christmas, but certainly there were very nice moments and a lot of reminders to be grateful.
And now to bed.
Posted by Susan Palwick at 11:39 PM 2 comments:
Labels: celebration, chaplaincy, church, faith, family, fantasy, hospital, knitting, loss
Friday, December 24, 2010
Miss You, Mom
This is the last photo I took of my mother, a year ago today.
To distract myself from sad memories, I went swimming -- the gym was a madhouse as everyone attempted to burn off a few more calories before Christmas -- and then went shopping. Last night I taught myself how to knit socks on two circular needles. It's not difficult, just a bit tricky, since the circulars tend to get tangled up in the sock, the yarn, and each other. It has the great advantage, though, that you can't lose a needle, which is something I routinely accomplish in really inconvenient places like airplanes and concerts. It has the other great advantage that trying on socks-in-progress is infinitely easier when they're on two circulars than when they're on three DPNs. So for the time being, I'm going to stick with this method.
This required me to go out and buy extra circs in sizes two and three. Along the way, I bought yarn (mostly on sale, and the non-sale stuff I paid for with the gift certificate my sister gave me for my birthday). Then I stopped by my favorite discount place and got two pairs of slacks for a total of $20. Woo-hoo! Shopping on Christmas Eve is fun when you don't have to do it.
I got home to discover that the two estate checks, my final Christmas gift from my mother, had come in today's mail.
Miss you, Mom.
Posted by Susan Palwick at 4:38 PM 5 comments:
Thursday, December 23, 2010
But Not That Dense
My doctor's nurse called this morning. My doctor can't offer a terribly informed opinion about this test because it's so new, but the nurse did say that while my report says I have dense breast tissue, there's no indication that the radiologist had any trouble reading the scan, which was absolutely normal. There's simply no indication for further testing, so I'm not going to do it.
As the nurse said, "Three hundred dollars is a lot to charge people for peace of mind." We talked a little about the marketing aspects of this. Like me, the nurse is offended that this company's capitalizing on women's fears of mortal illness, trying to create anxiety even when existing diagnostic exams reveal no reason for it.
In other news, I'm knitting my first pair of kneesocks, and this morning managed to do the knitting math required to calculate how many increases I need, over how many rows, for the sock to fit over my calf. We'll see how this works out. Knitting: always an adventure!
Posted by Susan Palwick at 6:33 PM 1 comment:
Labels: knitting, personal health
Wednesday, December 22, 2010
My mammogram results came yesterday; they were normal, but the radiologist had affixed a sticker (pink, natch) to the latter saying that I'm a candidate for Sonocine. This is a whole-breast ultrasound, recommended for women with dense breast tissue, that supposedly catches small cancers that don't show up on a regular mammogram. At the radiology place where I got the mammogram, there were Sonocine posters all over the place: they're pushing this thing like it's the latest perfume. So part of me is ready to dismiss the girly pink sticker as pure medical marketing (especially since Sonocine is, I believe, headquartered here in Reno).
On the other hand, my mother's breast cancer only showed up on mammo when it had already spread to a bunch of lymph nodes, and although her outcome was excellent, the entire saga would have been much easier on everybody if they'd caught it before that. So I called the number on the girly pink sticker to ask some questions. Is this procedure covered by my insurance? No, and it costs $296.
A kind and very patient receptionist listened to my skepticism and assured me that no, the radiology place isn't sticking pink Sonocine stickers on every report that goes out, that only women with especially dense breast tissue are candidates for this procedure. (You always knew I was dense!) "But you can wait," she told me. "You don't have to do it now. Maybe it will be covered by your insurance in a few years."
The way the state budget's going, I'll be lucky if I have insurance in a few years. So I said, "I think I'm going to call my gynecologist and ask her opinion."
"Absolutely," said the kind, patient receptionist. "That's exactly what I'd do."
My gynecologist is out of the office today, but her receptionist -- who'd clearly never heard of this thing, and sounded baffled -- took a message and said she'll call me tomorrow morning. If my doc thinks it's a good idea, I'll certainly do it. I've had plenty of medical procedures that cost more money than that just for the twenty percent copay (the back MRI, most recently). In the meantime, I think I'm just rebelling against the fear-of-breast-cancer-as-big-business model that's clearly at work here, despite whatever real benefits this procedure offers.
Posted by Susan Palwick at 2:52 PM No comments:
Labels: personal health
What with snow and cold, we haven't been using our deck, but other creatures have.
I saw these tracks in the snow and thought they made a pretty pattern, so I took some snapshots. My best guess is that they were made by quail.
Yesterday I saw some rabbit tracks in our driveway, too.
Posted by Susan Palwick at 1:10 PM No comments:
Tuesday, December 21, 2010
New Toys
Staples had a shredder on sale yesterday for $29.00 (after rebate), so I got one. One of my long-term sabbatical plans is to get my filing cabinets cleaned out and organized -- there's stuff in there I literally haven't touched since we moved to Nevada thirteen years ago -- and that will include discarding ancient financial documents, so the shredder seems like a prudent investment.
Meanwhile, today the CrackBerry store had a one-day sale on the Tether program, which turns your BlackBerry into a mobile hotspot for your computer. This will be very helpful when I'm traveling with my netbook. You can connect the phone and computer via USB cable or Bluetooth, but Bluetooth eats up so much power that I'll be going the USB route. My Kindle recharging cable doubles as a USB. Very handy!
So I'm pleased. New gadgets are always fun, and now I won't have to worry about paying for internet access in hotels, airports, coffeeshops, etc. Unfortunately it won't do me any good on our Mexico cruise, since international roaming rates and cruise-ship roaming rates are both more than I want to pay, but it will be great the next time (for instance) we go to Hawai'i.
In writing news, today I talked to my editor about a new plot turn in the book. I was afraid it was too over the top, but he said it sounds workable. We had a nice chat. To my immense relief, he seems unconcerned about deadlines; his attitude is, "Give the book as much time as it needs." So I feel like I have a little more breathing room than I did before, although I still want to finish this project sooner rather than later.
Happy Winter Solstice, everyone! From now on, the days get longer! What a relief!
Posted by Susan Palwick at 8:19 PM No comments:
Labels: celebration, technogadgets, travel, writing
Dawn Treader
So we indeed saw the new Narnia movie today. I enjoyed it more than Gary or our friend Katharine did, just because I'm so fond of the book. No film can capture the magic of Lewis' prose, and special effects by themselves don't do the trick.
Most magical moment for me: When the dragon's eye opens and we see Aslan reflected in it. Following closely on this was the slightly later scene when Caspian and the children are walking across the sand and the lion's shadow joins them.
I liked the treatment of the Eustace subplot the best; the stowaway child -- was she even in the book? -- seemed completely extraneous and unnecessary, and Lucy simpered entirely too much.
I'm glad I went, but I feel no need to see it again. I've downloaded the first three Narnia books from Audible, though, and look forward to listening to them!
Posted by Susan Palwick at 6:57 PM No comments:
Monday, December 20, 2010
Sunday, December 19, 2010
I went to church this morning, rather than afternoon, for the ten a.m. Lessons & Carols service, which I always love. A handful of people from my old church were there, including our deacon and his wife; he's going to start serving at the new church on Christmas Eve, so I'll definitely go to that service, now that I'm going to be in town. (We had awful weather all day today -- snow, rain, snow, wind, snow -- and lots of other people have cancelled plans that involved crossing the mountains.)
It was nice to see old friends.
This church has a pre-service slideshow of various announcements and visuals. This morning, I looked up to see a slightly different version of the image above, one that acknowledged the source of the quotation as C.S. Lewis' The Silver Chair. After my previous post, this was -- again -- perfect.
In Traveling Mercies, Anne Lamott describes her conversion as the feeling that "a little cat was following me," and says she finally told the cat -- as it wound around her ankles at her front door -- something like, "Oh, all right, you can come in."
I guess mine's a big cat.
In other news, yesterday I used my very wobbly Spanish for the first time at the hospital. I'd introduced myself to a patient and her family; the husband said they didn't speak much English, so I said I speak a little bit of Spanish. I tried to ask the patient if she wanted prayers or a warm blanket, but when I used the phrase "manta caliente" (which I'd gotten from Google Translator a few weeks ago, since it's something I say all the time at the hospital), the family merely stared at me in evident alarm. I pantomimed being cold and wrapping myself in a blanket, and she said yes, so I got her a blanket, and I believe I succeeded in asking the man if he wanted some water, which he declined. But by then they'd switched back to speaking English -- much more fluently than I speak Spanish! -- and they gave me such odd looks whenever they saw me afterwards that I hope I hadn't asked her if she wanted a spicy manta ray, or something worse. ("No, thank you. Spicy manta rays are what landed me in the ER in the first place.") Later I asked one of the housekeepers who speaks Spanish how to say "warm blanket," and she suggested "savannah caliente." I'll use that next time.
A student who's a paramedic told me the story of an English-speaking colleague of hers trying to coach a Spanish-speaking woman through labor in the back of his ambulance. He kept telling her to push, and couldn't understand why she and her husband were getting so upset at him. Turned out that the word he'd been using for push was "puta."
Ouch. I hope my own gaffe wasn't quite that awful.
Well, at least I tried. And I have to say that in all my years of studying languages (six years of French in junior high and high school, Old English in grad school, a grueling summer of intensive Latin in grad school), this is the first time I've ever tried to use another language in a real-world situation.
After my hospital shift I got a haircut and then wandered into Ross to look, unsuccessfully, for a cardigan sweater. I heard a small child sobbing, "Quiero!" and managed to deduce that he was crying, in the phrase so beloved of kids, "I want it! I want it!"
With any luck, he wasn't pestering his mom for a spicy manta ray.
Posted by Susan Palwick at 7:21 PM 3 comments:
Saturday, December 18, 2010
Christmas Gift
Last night I got a little weepy, a combination of missing my parents and disappointment that we aren't going to San Francisco. I told Gary that to console myself, I want to see the new Narnia movie sometime this week. (We find 3D merely annoying, but have found theaters where it's playing in good old 2D.) I don't expect the film to be anywhere near as good as the book, but I read a review that said that this one's better than the other two, with more moral weight. I'm listening to an audiotape of Lewis' Surpised by Joy at the moment, so I'm in the mood.
I grew up on, and at least partly in, Narnia. My sister read me The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe when I was pretty small, and I went on to devour the others on my own. I haven't reread the books for many decades now, although the boxed set my mother bought me when I was a child sits loyally on my bookshelves, but a typed copy of Puddleglum's famous quotation from The Silver Chair -- the long speech that concludes, "I'm on Aslan's side even if there isn't any Aslan to lead it" -- is taped above my desk.
I was completely smitten with Aslan when I was a kid, partly because he was such a great character and partly because I loved cats, big or small, anyway. I think I've written here before about how my own imaginary world, called "Aleia" (complete with maps, including the annexed territories of Narnia and Oz) was populated with my favorite characters from other stories, as well as a number of my own. Chief among the residents were Aslan and Elsa, the lioness from Born Free, who married, mated, and had litters of rollicking cubs.
My aunt and uncle went to Africa when I was a kid, and I begged my uncle to bring back a picture of a lion for me. I was grievously disappointed when he sent me a postcard of a lion: I'd wanted him to meet a lion, talk to it, and take a snapshot. A few years later, when I learned that the real-life Elsa had died some time before -- and I hadn't even known it -- I sobbed for days. It was my first taste of real grief.
In fifth grade, when my mother moved to a larger apartment and I was terrified over the move (have I mentioned that I was a strange, neurotic little girl?), Mom put a poster in my new room to reconcile me to the space. The poster was a large black-and-white photograph of a male lion with a tiny tabby kitten curled between its paws. I loved it.
I'm more than half-convinced that my immersion in the Narnia books made me a sleeper Christian decades before I ever dreamed of going to church. I'm sure C.S. Lewis would approve.
So, anyway. Last night I babbled about all of this to Gary for a while. An hour or so later, when we settled down to watch our current DVD -- the fourth season of The Tudors -- he came downstairs with a rolled-up poster and said, "Here. This is your Christmas gift." (Hours earlier, when we'd decided not to go to San Francisco, almost his first words were, "This doesn't mean we have to buy each other Christmas presents, does it?" We'd decided that the trip would be our gift to each other, and Gary loathes everything to do with the holiday.)
It's the poster of Aslan shown at the top of this post. Gary had snagged a free copy when he went to another movie, and had forgotten he had it until last night.
How perfect is that?
Posted by Susan Palwick at 9:48 AM 2 comments:
Friday, December 17, 2010
Snow Day
It's been snowing here all day. I'd planned to go to the gym today, to go to the garage for a minor car repair, and to go to my fiddle lesson. Instead, I've just stayed inside. (Charlene called this morning and said that if I wanted to cancel because of weather, it was fine with her.)
Forecasts are for us to get socked with a series of winter storms from now until early next week, and then maybe around Christmas, too. This was the lead story in the paper this morning, with warnings about avalanches, floods, high winds, and possible power outages. Motorists, especially in the mountains, are alerted to be prepared for "slow and hazardous" travel, and to make sure they've brought lots of food, water and blankets.
So we've just made our formal decision not to go to San Francisco, and are cancelling reservations. Sigh.
We'll see if I get to the hospital tomorrow.
Tomorrow's two years since my father's terrible trip from the Palo Alto VA back to Reno, through a Sierra blizzard with only one oxygen tank (described in this post), and Sunday is two years since Gary's dad died. So this weather seems to be a historical pattern. With any luck, though, everyone we love will remain alive this weekend.
Posted by Susan Palwick at 5:06 PM 2 comments:
I just finished my first cowl in this totally awesome reversible pattern. Easy: just knits and purls! Fun! Infinitely adjustable! Warm, soft and comfortable! This one's pure wool. When I've knit down the pure wool in my stash, I'll definitely do some of these in superwash.
The pattern calls for the cowl to be seven inches high, but I doubled that to make it easier to use as a hat/scarf combo. (The pattern's a Ravelry download, so anyone who's interested can find it there.) The next one I make will begin and end with a garter-stitch border, since the top and bottom of the finished cowl aren't as neat as I'd like. Overall, though, great pattern!
Posted by Susan Palwick at 1:35 PM No comments:
Labels: knitting
Thursday, December 16, 2010
Jangle Bells
Readers please note: In this post, I express a number of minority, and perhaps heretical, opinions. If you disagree with me, that's fine, but please don't flame me for having a different take on things.
Okay, so: The last few days have been a bit stressful. Yesterday my sister called to talk to me about closing out Mom's estate before the end of the calendar year, which the lawyer had recommmended. I hadn't seen this coming, and although the procedures she outlined on the phone weren't that complicated, they sent me into a tizzy. I went totally into scarcity space: hyperventilating oh-my-god-I'm-gonna-starve-to-death-in-a-cardboard-box mode.
On the face of it, this makes no sense. Why would one feel a sudden surge of panic on learning that one's acquiring several thousand unexpected dollars? At the time, I couldn't analyze it past the point of recognizing that financial matters always send me into a cold sweat. To calm my nerves, I went to the gym and swam for an hour. That sort of worked, although the perky Christmas music in the lockerroom left me with the strong and un-Christian urge to take a flamethrower to Frosty the Snowman. (I heard two other women complaining about the music, so I wasn't alone in my reaction.)
After the swim, I managed to get more of a handle on why I'd gone off the deep end, so to speak. After this, there will be no more estate. This is really the end, finis, the last money I'll get from my mother, and it's coming at the darkest time of the year, and on the heels of a conversation Gary and I had with a financial advisor who told us that I have to work for at least another fifteen years; I'd hoped for only ten. (And yes, I know: at least I have a job! And I'm indeed grateful!)
Once I'd figured that out, I started organizing my Christmas packages to the East Coast. It always amazes me how long wrapping takes; I'd economized -- probably unwisely -- by packing the wrapped gifts in old boxes we had in the garage, which meant that I had to wrap the boxes in plain brown wrapping paper to cover old Amazon labels and so forth.
I thought I had enough brown wrapping paper. I did, sort of, but only if I covered each box in two or three pieces of the stuff, which led to lots of fun with packing tape -- our only roll was playing "let's hide the end so you can't find it!" -- especially since Bali and Figgy had gotten into my study and were prancing through boxes and wrapping paper, getting themselves stuck to the tape, and so forth. The upshot of this ridiculous situation was that I spent all night wrapping two frigging boxes and went to sleep in a really bad mood.
I woke up this morning, feeling only marginally less cranky, to find the promised e-mailed documents from the attorney. I printed them out, ran around getting stuff notarized and mailed (the post office lines were shorter than I expected, and the boxes should arrive next week), and dashed home for lunch. I called my sister to tell her that I'd mailed the legal stuff, and discovered that she'd just been in a minor car accident -- she'd skidded into another car in snow -- and was very shaken up, despite no damage to people and only minor damage to cars.
That conversation made me a few minutes late for my beloved annual mammogram, which I've been superstitiously nervous about because my mother's breast cancer was diagnosed the Christmas after her father died. (This was in 1987; obviously she survived it, although the cancer was far advanced even though the mammogram supposedly caught it early.) No one I know enjoys these procedures, anyway: a friend who refuses to undergo them says, "I'll let them do that to me when men start having annual cancer screenings in which their testicles are smashed between two plates."
I don't agree with this sentiment, but I sympathize. Even for modestly endowed women like me, mammograms hurt. Also, I recently taught Barbara Ehrenreich's scathing and brilliant Welcome to Cancerland to my freshman-comp class, so her critiques of breast-cancer culture were fresh in my mind. Ehrenreich is deeply alarmed by the consumerization of breast cancer, which normalizes it and helps transform it into a rite of passage rather than a huge injustice perpetrated upon women's bodies by environmental toxins. (My completely non-activist mother's first words, after her diagnosis, were, "Well, that's what I get for living in New Jersey all these years." Even she got the environmental connection.) Ehrenreich cites studies that call into serious question the efficacy both of current screening methods and current treatments, and points out that if people gave their money directly to cancer research -- rather than supporting runs, walks and rallies with large overhead costs, or buying pink-beribboned teddy bears, jewelry, etc. and so forth -- we might make more headway against the disease. She's especially withering on how the rhetoric of breast cancer, with its pink everything, infantilizes women. In short, she thinks women are being lulled into complacency, whereas anger at the situation might result in more effective action (think Act Up).
Ehrenreich dislikes the color pink. So do I. So does my friend who refuses to get mammograms, who was ecstatic when I told her about the Ehrenreich essay. She hadn't known that anyone else felt the same way.
So I was thinking about all of that while sitting in the very crowded waiting room. I waited over thirty minutes, and finally all of us in the outer waiting room were summoned into the inner waiting room, which was warmer and more comfortable. There we found a large bin of hideous pink plastic Christmas ornaments in shiny purple mesh gift bags. A beaming hospital employee invited each of us to take one home.
I saw pink. Channeling Ehrenreich, I said to the beaming hospital employee, "I have a question. Wouldn't the money that went into manufacturing these ornaments be better spent on actual cancer research?"
She didn't even blink. "Yes. Yes, it would." (Good for you, lady!)
I gave her a brief overview of Ehrenreich. A woman at the other end of the room looked interested and asked me some questions as she cradled her pink ornament. Everyone else ignored us. ("If we don't look at her, maybe she'll go away.")
The hospital employee told me about various hospital projects that do contribute directly to research. Good for them! She and the patient with the ornament decided, between them, that the point of the ornaments was to "give people hope." Hey, if a tacky plastic ornament gives them hope, good for them. I, personally, don't find Christmas trees festooned with kitschy reminders of serious illnesses profoundly hopeful, but we all know how weird I am.
Finally they called me in. I got squashed. The tech was very deft; everyone was very nice. This is the place I always go, because they're very deft and very nice, and the one time I got called back for further scrutiny of an "area of concern" (which turned out to be a shadow), the male doctor was immensely kind and spent much more time talking to me than the situation actually warranted. That interpersonal skill is worth dumptrucks of plastic ornaments.
I went from the mammo place to the gym, where I worked out for forty-five minutes on the elliptical, traveling 3.3 miles and burning 350 calories. I was very pleased with myself, but leaving the gym, I discovered the lobby festooned with pink and white balloons and "See Pink!" banners, as more and more people (including musicians with instrument cases) piled into the building. Some kind of breast-cancer fundraiser was underway. The club staff assured me the money would go to research, which makes me wonder if the refreshments and music were donated.
I blew my workout on three yummy cookies from the tables piled high with treats. I went home to find more treats from my sister: a box of chocolate-dipped fruit. Yum. Goodbye, workout.
At least, thank God, my sister's okay after her accident. And Gary and I will now have a slightly larger financial cushion during my sabbatical. And -- this is the really exciting news -- I just performed my first felted join in a knitting project, and am thoroughly enchanted. No ends to weave in! Yay!
Posted by Susan Palwick at 9:27 PM 8 comments:
Labels: animals, current events, family, feminism, knitting, loss, narrative medicine, personal health, swimming, teaching, triggers
Wednesday, December 15, 2010
I've heard teaching described as an exercise in plagiarism. Most of us cheerfully use approaches, material and exercise we've gotten from colleagues, and most of us also cheerfully share our approaches, material and exercises with colleagues. I do plenty of this myself, although -- mindful to model academic accountability for my students -- I try always to acknowledge my sources.
At the same time, syllabi are intellectual property. Professors put weeks, if not months, of work into these documents. Actually, it probably amounts to years, when you think about all the background reading and thought that culminates in designing a course. Many of my professor friends no longer post syllabi on websites, for instance, because they don't want strangers just lifting their work.
I'll always share syllabi with colleagues in my own department, especially graduate students designing their own courses on similar subjects. But last week, I got an e-mail from a stranger (who shall remain nameless and de-identified, to use HIPAA language) who plans to teach a freshman-comp course about narrative and medicine, and who more or less demanded a copy of my syllabus from this fall. This individual also asked if I'd be willing to read an essay he plans to submit to medical-humanities publications.
The tone and cluelessness of this letter left a seriously bad taste in my mouth. First of all, I spent a long time writing that syllabus, and I'm not just going to hand it over to a stranger. Design your own course, dude! Also, c'mon: it's mid-December, when academics are up to their necks in grading. If you're an academic yourself, surely you know this? And if you're an academic, you must be aware that we all have our own writing to do. No, I don't have time to read your essay. (I have a long-standing policy of only reading manuscripts by current students, unless I'm doing a formal manuscript review for a press, something for which I'll be paid and/or receive service credit from my department.)
Aside: I know that the world is full of people who assume that writers, and writing teachers, greet unsolicited manuscripts with cries of joy because they have nothing else to do with their time. "A 900-page novel about telekinetic gophers! Riddled with grammatical errors! Printed in green ink on butcher paper! In a shoebox! Be still, my heart! My life's dream has been fulfilled!"
Okay, obviously I'm being unkind and sarcastic here. I can identify with the desperation of beginning writers -- been there, felt that -- but there are accepted ways to get people to read your work. Take a class. Enroll in a workshop. Do your homework, and by all that's holy learn the conventions of the field. Be professional or be toast.
I'm sure my correspondent's unread essay was, at least, professionally formatted. But I wouldn't expect a college instructor to fall into the arrogance of sending his work to a stranger without an explicit invitation.
Annoyed, I put off answering this missive until this morning, when I informed him, as nicely as possible, that I wasn't comfortable sharing my writing assignments until he told me how he planned to acknowledge them as my work, not his. (I also reminded him that composition instructors need to be very sensitive to tone in their own writing, since it's something we try to teach our students.) I did send him a list of the reading my students had most enjoyed. I closed, though, by saying that I was sorry I didn't have time to read his essay.
I clicked on "send" and then saw that I had a new e-mail from him. Our e-mails had crossed in cyberspace. His second one copied the text of the first and repeated, with evident exasperation, his demand that I send him my syllabus. He'd also attached his essay so I could read it.
Dude: it's mid-December, when you may safely expect fellow academics to take a week to answer an e-mail. No, I'm not going to read your fracking essay -- find someone who actually knows you to do that -- and if you want my writing assignments, you'd #!$%* well better footnote me on your syllabus.
I've deleted the second e-mail, since he now has my response to the first. Frankly, I think I was generous to share any information with him at all. I'll still send him my writing assignments if he can promise me that they'll be acknowledged; I'm very curious to see how he'll respond to that request.
In happier news, I turned in my grades yesterday. In even less happy news, grim weather's forecast for the mountains for Saturday through Wednesday, so we may not get to San Francisco at all. Pray for sunshine!
Later: I got back a much nicer e-mail than the other two -- and he seems genuinely engaged with the subject -- so I went ahead and sent him some material. I'm glad the conversation ended better than it started!
Posted by Susan Palwick at 10:30 AM 5 comments:
Labels: narrative medicine, teaching, travel, writing
Monday, December 13, 2010
Back in the Saddle
I went to the hospital this weekend for the first time in, like, forever, since my various ailments have kept me away. It was a good shift; many of my visits seemed especially meaningful to patients, and I also had a nice conversation with a nurse I haven't seen in a while.
In church on Sunday, I had the pleasure of listening to a friend preach. He was in my preaching class (he's a priest now), and he's very gifted. The homily was beautifully crafted and well delivered, the best sermon I've heard in a long time. Afterwards, when I complimented him, he said, "Thanks! And speaking of which, are you interested in doing any preaching here?"
I told him I am. He's going to mention it to the rector. I'm very happy; one reason I chose this parish is because I thought I might have a chance of preaching again, but I didn't expect the subject to come up this soon.
This week's a bit crazy. I'll be handing in grades tomorrow, but the week's still filled with meetings and other work tasks, including preparation of annual-review materials, a chore which always takes at least three days. I'm trying to get the first draft of my novel done by the time classes start on January 18, but I just got a revision request on an essay I submitted to a volume on Tolkien, and the new version's due January 15. (We were supposed to get revision requests in October, but the editor's been ill; I can certainly relate to that kind of delay!) I'm also behind on Christmas knitting, which absolutely has to be done by the end of this week, so I can get packages in the mail before our trip to San Francisco.
At least, we hope we'll be going to San Francisco. Weather forecasts are grim: if we can make it over the mountains, it's supposed to rain all week in the city. So even if we get there, I may not get my Christmas walk on the beach after all.
Oh well. We can always hit the museums. If we wind up stuck here for Christmas, I'll probably spend part of the day at the hospital, since anyone in the ER that day will need extra comfort. But as much as I love my volunteer work, I'd rather be in San Francisco!
Posted by Susan Palwick at 8:52 PM 1 comment:
Labels: chaplaincy, church, hospital, knitting, personal health, preaching, teaching, travel, weather, writing
Thursday, December 09, 2010
Wednesday, December 08, 2010
Little Pack Mule
Remember a few days ago, when I said I'd spent some writing money on yet another backpack purse? Well, it arrived, and I think it's finally what I've wanted for several years now. This little beauty, a mere 8 by 10 by 4.5 inches, is the Victorinox Flex Pack, known elsewhere as the Swiss Army Flex Pack.
This pack solves several problems of previous packback purses I've owned. The straps are wide enough not to cut into my shoulders (for some reason, entirely too many women's backpacks have spaghetti straps), and the back's padded for comfort. The hardware on said straps -- which are infinitely adjustable via sliding buckles -- allows me to attach my cellphone case on one side, and a keyring with a whistle and mini-flashlight on the other. This keeps those objects in the front and gives me instant access to them. The pack's very lightweight, even fully loaded. There's a top carry loop which can double as a handle if you want to carry the pack like a purse.
And don't let the pack's tiny size fool you. Mine currently contains:
In the main compartment:
* My wallet, zipped securely into a pocket on the back wall.
* My Kindle.
* My journal.
* A sock-knitting project.
* A small case of knitting notions.
* A small notebook in which I record purchases.
* My business-card case.
* A cosmetic mirror and comb (tucked into an elastic pocket).
* My thumb drive (in the other elastic pocket).
In the top front pocket:
* A bottle of eyeglass cleaning solution.
* A microfiber cloth for wiping clean said eyeglasses.
In the front organizer pocket:
* Three pens and a Japanese folding fan (for those menopausal hot flashes), all of which fit neatly in a slash pocket. I was afraid that the lack of pen loops would be a drawback, but having unstructured space for pens is actually better.
* Lip balm, hand balm, eye drops, and Advil in another slash pocket.
* My lucky beach rocks in a small zippered mesh pocket.
* My small appointment calendar and a pack of tissues.
There's also a key fob, which I'm not using.
Oh, yeah, and there's a zipout mesh pocket on one side which will hold a water bottle or umbrella.
Security Features
I'm paranoid about purses. I've had three stolen: one was cut off my body by a guy on a bicyle wielding a knife -- in broad daylight on a very busy street in New York City -- and another was snatched as I walked back to my mother's apartment in New Jersey. To be fair, those two were easily snatchable, even though the first was a cross-body bag, because my hands were full with other things: lesson learned! But one wants to be able to carry other things, yes? The third bag was lifted from the back of my chair in a restaurant in New York.
Obviously, anybody who really wants my purse is going to be able to get it: I won't sacrifice my life for my Kindle, or even my socks-in-progress. But the Flex Pack has several very useful security features. The zippers slide into elastic zipper garages, which would make them more difficult for a pickpocket to open. The straps are not only pleasingly thick, but reinforced with wire, making them slash-resistant.
Finally, the fabric's strong nylon, also slash-resistant (and probably weather-resistant into the bargain, useful when the bag contains a Kindle).
The only weak spot I can see is that, because this pack can also be used as a cross-body or waistpack should one choose (hence the name Flex Pack), the straps attach to the main body of the back with quick-release buckles. Theoretically, a clever thief, or a pair of them, could reach out and release the buckles and then yank the pack from one's back, although one hopes they'd search out easier targets. To address this problem, I've ordered some cable keyrings I'll use to attach the two parts of the buckle. I'll use another of the keyrings to anchor the bag to my chair back or leg if I'm in a public place, to prevent its growing legs.
And the downside?
Because we don't live in a perfect world, the Flex Pack has two drawbacks. First, the price is a bit steep, although many good purses cost a lot more. I think it's worth every penny, obviously, but for several decades of my life I wouldn't have dreamed of spending this much money on a bag.
Secondly, it's not sexy. If you're looking for an elegant or pretty backback purse, look elsewhere. This is a black square with zippers. It's not going to win any awards for aesthetics, although the design's pleasingly clean. But although my other packback purses are prettier, this one's superior in every other respect.
Also, if you want something big, this isn't your bag. If you want something small but sturdy, it's perfect!
There you go. That's my review.
And in other news, I finished my Christmas shopping today (all but the knitting!).
Posted by Susan Palwick at 5:41 PM 5 comments:
Labels: shopping
Tuesday, December 07, 2010
The Last Service
The story about St. Stephen's last service -- it's a mini-documentary sound clip with photos -- was posted on the website after all. I just missed it. Here is it.
Liz Margerum, the reporter, did a gorgeous job on this. Her dad's our deacon. In the sound clip, you can hear him choke up as he's reading the Gospel. (The long pause is when he was trying to get his voice back under control; he choked up anyway as he kept reading.)
I'm so glad she did this.
Posted by Susan Palwick at 1:20 PM 4 comments:
Labels: church, current events, loss
Things Seen and Unseen
I have a new column up at Church Health Reader. This one's particularly fitting for anyone who's having a blue Christmas, so I'm glad they posted it this month.
I also like their pregnancy focus for Advent. Sunday's homily was about how the church has traditionally described Advent as a time of waiting, and how "nesting" -- the compulsive urge women often feel late in pregnancy to create clean, safe places for themselves and their babies -- may be a better metaphor. Our job in Advent is to organize God's nursery, to create a place in ourselves and our lives for the divine.
Works for me!
Posted by Susan Palwick at 10:29 AM 1 comment:
Labels: chaplaincy, church, church health reader, hospital, loss
Monday, December 06, 2010
I just got back from teaching my last two formal classes of the semester (although my students and I have to attend a poster presentation on Saturday). Driving home, I thought about how I always used to call my mother and say, "I'm done with classes!", and how I can't do that anymore.
So I was already feeling a little weepy when I pulled into the garage. Getting out of the car, I glanced up at a shelf and saw a red-berry Christmas tree, a small tabletop one that Gary and I bought one year when Mom visited for Christmas. We never decorate just for ourselves, but we did for her.
Seeing the tree undid me completely.
This is just going to keep happening for a while, especially through the holidays. I'm so glad we're going to San Francisco.
Posted by Susan Palwick at 6:04 PM 3 comments:
My copies of the Italian edition of Flying in Place arrived this weekend. See how pretty? It's in Italian! It's on Kindle! Flying in Place is all over the place!
I stayed home from the hospital on Saturday, again, because I still had a wretched cough and didn't want to alarm anyone in the ER. I intended to be virtuous and get a lot of work done. Ha.
Well, okay, maybe, if you define knitting as work (which I don't, exactly). I woke up, finished one pair of socks, started another pair of socks, worked on my qiviut scarf, went for a short swim to stretch out my back, went to the yarn store, where I worked some more on the qiviut scarf and bought a new pair of circular needles, and then came home, where -- to test the new needles, 'natch -- I stayed up entirely too late knitting a completely addictive cowl. Cowls are great! They're scarves! They're hats! They're fun and stretchy! I foresee many cowls as Christmas gifts next year.
On Sunday, sleeping off my knitting hangover, I was in bed until noon (eeek!), and got up feeling roughly as energetic as the young lady on the Italian FliP cover. Had a fiddle lesson, went to church, and drove Gary to a concert at the university; instead of going to the concert myself, I worked in the library to make up for time lost to knitting.
Today's the last day of formal classes, although I still have various piles o' grading and administrative tasks, and a poster session my freshman are required to attend on Saturday. But we're definitely in the home stretch.
Posted by Susan Palwick at 9:48 AM 2 comments:
Labels: hospital, knitting, personal health, teaching, writing
Friday, December 03, 2010
Words to the Wise
This gem courtesy of YouTube via the Mythsoc listserv.
I'm going to show this to my fiction workshop on Monday. Too unbelievably funny, precisely because it's so true. I've heard would-be writers say all of these things.
Posted by Susan Palwick at 10:28 AM 2 comments:
Thursday, December 02, 2010
Using His Tail as a Scarf
Posted by Susan Palwick at 6:36 PM 1 comment:
Better Lighting!
Posted by Susan Palwick at 11:53 AM 2 comments:
Wednesday, December 01, 2010
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Category: Prevention Through Design
The New ANSI Nail Gun Standard is a Lost Opportunity for Safety
Pneumatic nail guns have (PNGs) caused injury and death to both workers and consumers. These easy-to-use tools are designed to quickly drive nails into work surfaces. Commercially available first in the 1960s, PNGs are now the most popular type of nail gun in use. These tools are able to drive any size nail into wood Read More >Posted on by 3 Comments
Buy Quiet Update
Several years ago NIOSH started the planning process for a "buy quiet" initiative to encourage companies to purchase or rent quieter machinery and tools to reduce worker noise exposure. This initiative also aimed to provide information on equipment noise levels and promote manufacturers to design quieter equipment. NIOSH is now pleased to announce the official Read More >Posted on by 11 Comments
Green Buildings and Human Health
Earlier this year I participated in the U.S. Green Building Council (USGBC) Summit on Green Buildings and Human Health. At USGBC's invitation, I authored a blog that appears on their website. We are co-posting the blog on the NIOSH Science Blog. The Summit was very successful, and USGBC is open to including worker issues into Read More >Posted on by 13 Comments
Buy Quiet
Quieter tools and machines lead to decreased hearing loss among the workers who use them. So why aren't companies "buying quiet"? Read more about the challenges in this area and what NIOSH is doing to make it easier to "buy quiet." Read More >Posted on by 25 Comments
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text: VideoEdit 03:20 Rant on Nosy People Retrieved from "http://nigahiga.wikia.com/wiki/Rant_on_Nosy_People?oldid=4709" Ad blocker interference detected! Wikia is a free-to-use site that makes money from advertising. We have a modified experience for viewers using ad blockers Wikia is not accessible if you've made further modifications. Remove the custom ad blocker rule(s) and the page will load as expected. Categories: Videos Add category Cancel Save


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frankie as hercules
elizabeth as megera
jason as philocetes
sean as hades
Danberry and Fishy as Pain and Panic
Carl Lakey, Johnathan, and Striker as an Extra with Danberry and Fishy
the gross sisters (proud family) as the fates
wicket as pegusas
The Monstars from (Space Jam) as The Titans
Monstar Pound from(Space Jam) as cyclop
monster as hydra
insectosaurus from (monsters vs vs aliens) as cerberus
Johnatan and Corey from (The Mrs. Cherry Show) as Pain and Panic as boys
A female habbit as Pain and Panic as a horse
- Sean/hades: And now that I set you free, what is the first thing you,re going to dooooooo!!!!!!!!!
- ALL Monstars: destroy him!!!!!!
- Bupkus: Crush! Daddy!
- Blanko: Freeze Him
- Bang: Melt Daddy
- Nawt: BLOW.......HIM.......AWAY!!!!!!!!
- Bupkus: Daddy
- Blanko: Freeze him
- Sean: Um guys (The Monstars/Titans turns at Sean/Hades, while finding olimpus)
- Bupkus: Daddy
- Blanko: Freeze Him
- Sean: Hold it right eye
- Pound: Huh? (Monstar Pound/Cyclops turns at Sean/Hades)
- Sean: I got a special job for you, my? Monstar friend.


text: During Q2, we completed and installed the 25-megawatt Modesto Irrigation District project. Additionally, we continue to gain traction with our C7 concentrator product and recently signed a 6-megawatt agreement with a major U.S. utility. Project completion is scheduled for the first half of next year. More on C7 later.In our North American commercial business, we completed a 10-megawatt system for Campbell Soup and starting construction of a 2-megawatt system for Bloomberg. In residential, we saw a strong growth driven by a combination of organic expansion and share gains due to the rapid adoption of our leasing program. For example, we doubled the number of lease signings in Q2 versus Q1 and recently established a financing facility with Citi and Credit Suisse for up to $325 million of lease capacity that will fund the continued growth of this business. Read the rest of this transcript for free on seekingalpha.com


text:
Welcome to the Nelson Mandela Digital Archive Project. Our aim is to locate, document, digitise, and provide access to all archival materials related to Nelson Mandela. This is a work in progress. Here is a selection of materials arranged in exhibits for your enjoyment.
Nelson Mandela Centre of Memory
Title: Long Walk Original Manuscript (Image #76)
Transcript: large scale attempts to drive back the white man into the sea. Sporadic efforts were still to be made by organised groups and isolated individuals to resort to armed violence against the whites but, for the moment, the age of settling problems between blacks and whites by means of war belonged to the past.
Nevertheless the black man's desire to win back his country and direct its destinies still burned as fiercely as before, and soon after the wars of dispossession, he was forging new weapons to voice his aspirations. A handful of small, regional, political organisations sprang up, all having as their main object the unity and freedom of each oppressed population group in a specified region. The oldest of the larger organisations that were to play a crucial role in the liberation struggle was the Natal Indian Congress, a constituent body of the South African Indian Congress, which was founded by Mahatma Gandhi in 1894, followed in 1902 by Dr. Abdurahaman's African People Organisation. Although the APO was in theory non racial, in actual fact it became an organisation for Coloureds.
But the most significant development in the black man's struggle through organised political action was the emergence in 1912 of the African National Congress, theoldest African national organisation in the country. Its emergence ws a landmark because the pivot of South African politics is, and has always been, the exact position of the African people in the country's political structure. A liberation movement which does not enjoy the support of the African masses is like waging a war without an army and only the involvement of the African people as a whole will give
Reference code: 076
Extent and Medium: 1 page


text: december, 2015 30dec2:00 pmPolar Bear Plunge Time(Wednesday) 2:00 pm Event DetailsCome test your thick skin Event Details Come test your thick skin in the Family Barn pool during the middle of the winter season! Snacks and warm drinks will be served while we watch the bravest of them all take a cold dip! No reservations necessary. 2:00pm at the Family Barn Pool Calendar GoogleCal No Comments Sorry, the comment form is closed at this time.


text:
- me-tooism
- noun see me-too
New Collegiate Dictionary. 2001.
New Collegiate Dictionary. 2001.
me-tooism — me tooer, n. me tooist, adj., n. /mee tooh iz euhm/, n. 1. the adopting of policies, methods, products, etc., similar or identical to those of a peer, rival, or competitor. 2. the practice of making a product, offering a service, etc., that… … Universalium
me-tooism — me too•ism [[t]ˈmiˈtu ɪz əm[/t]] n. 1) cvb the adopting of policies or practices similar or identical to those of a peer or competitor 2) the making of a product, offering of a service, etc., that duplicates one that has become successful •… … From formal English to slang
me-tooism — me too·ism … English syllables
me-tooism — ˈ ̷ ̷| ̷ ̷ˌizəm noun ( s) : the policies or principles of a me tooer * * * me tooer, n. me tooist, adj., n. /mee tooh iz euhm/, n. 1. the adopting of policies, methods, products, etc., similar or identical to those of a peer, rival, or competitor … Useful english dictionary
me-tooism — /mi ˈtuɪzəm/ (say mee toohizuhm) noun Colloquial 1. a desire to get whatever anyone else is getting regardless of whether it is really needed or even desirable. 2. a pattern of behaviour which is highly imitative of what someone else does. {from… … Australian English dictionary
me-too — ☆ me too [mē′to͞o′ ] adj. Informal designating or of policies or attitudes, esp. of a politician, adopted from a successful or powerful rival me tooism n … English World dictionary
me-too — me′ too′ adj. sts characterized by me tooism • Etymology: 1925–30 … From formal English to slang
me-too — I. ˈ ̷ ̷| ̷ ̷ adjective Etymology: from the phrase me too : marked by similarity to or acceptance of something (as a political policy) that has proved successful or persuasive when promoted by an opponent or rival conducted a me too campaign me… … Useful english dictionary
me-too — /mee tooh /, adj. Slang. characterized by or involving me tooism: a candidate s me too campaign. [1925 30; from phrase me too] * * * … Universalium
me-too — adjective Date: 1926 1. marked by similarity to or by adoption of successful or persuasive policies or practices used or promoted by someone else 2. similar or identical to an established product (as a drug) with no significant advantage over it… … New Collegiate Dictionary


text:
Calorimeter is an instrument used in physics to measure various thermal properties, such as heat capacity or the heat produced by fuel. A simple calorimeter consists of a heavy copper vessel that is polished (to reduce heat losses by radiation) and covered with insulating material (to reduce losses by convection and conduction).
In a typical experiment, such as to measure the heat capacity of a piece of metal, the calorimeter is filled with water, whose temperature rise is measured using a thermometer when a known mass of the heated metal is immersed in it.


text:
0.75 CT. T.W. Princess-Cut Diamond Frame Engagement Ring in 14K Gold
Item# 19302447
The Peoples Difference
Why shop Peoples?
Orig. $2,779.00
Now $2,362.15
An elegant look with style to spare, this 0.75 ct. t.w. diamond engagement ring is destined to win her heart. Fashioned in warm 14K gold, this ring features a 0.50 ct. princess-cut diamond centre stone set in an octagonal look frame set with round accent diamonds. The ring's shank is set with additional diamonds for extra sparkle. Ask for her hand with this extraordinary ring, and her answer can only be in the affirmative. View product details.
Special Offers
Diamond carat weights (CT.) represent the approximate total weight (T.W.) of all diamonds in each setting and may vary no more than .07 below the stated weight. Typographic errors are subject to correction. Merchandise enlarged to show detail and may not always be exactly as pictured. Promotions, prices, styles and availability may vary by store and online.


text:
- Galloway
- I. noun Etymology: Galloway, Scotland Date: 1805 any of a breed of hardy medium-sized hornless chiefly black beef cattle native to southwestern Scotland II. geographical name former district SW Scotland comprising area formerly in counties of Wigtown & Kirkcudbright — see Dumfries and Galloway • Galwegian adjective or noun
New Collegiate Dictionary. 2001.


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text:
The newest trailer for Avengers: Age of Ultron is here and giving us a lot more information on just how Ultron came to be and what that means for the team. There is also a hint at romance between Bruce and Natasha, and your first look at Paul Bettany as Vision.
Check it out after the break.
(via Twitter)


text:
VIDEO: Florida Motorcyclist Walks Away Unscathed From Nasty Crash
Unbelievable video coming out of Clearwater, FL. this week after a motorcyclist crashes into oncoming traffic and walks away unscathed!
Cops say a driver was making an improper left hand turn during a red light, and the motorcyclist couldn't get out of the way in time.
Surveillance video from the traffic light actually catches the rider being thrown off his bike and doing several cartwheels in the air before standing up and walking away.
Amazingly no one was seriously injured.
The driver of the car was also cited for driving with a suspended license.
Check out the video of the crash below.


text:
Argentina scrumhalf Tomas Cubelli says he won't force himself to bark orders at the ACT Brumbies unless it feels like a natural progression in his first Super Rugby season.
Cubelli has impressed in his first two games with the Brumbies, allaying fears the club would struggle after the departure of Wallabies' No. 9 Nic White at the end of last year.
However, the one minor glitch Cubelli is working on is teaching his teammates Spanish so there's no comprende problems.
"I'm getting more comfortable with it game by game. The guys really are making it easy for me," Cubelli said.
"I'm putting in hard work to try to get good combinations with my teammates [on] the field. Sometimes it goes out as a Spanish word. But at the same time they're getting used to some Spanish words.
"Speaking into the team has to be natural, not forcing it. I just have to play my part and do what I need to do when it's important.
"Yes [they can understand me], the halfback is always trying to say things that are obvious so the forwards or other guys know. When you're tired on the field, someone has to do it. Sometimes it's easier to understand when you're playing rugby rather than speaking."
The Brumbies flew to Perth on Wednesday night in preparation for their clash against the Western Force on Friday.
Cubelli has enjoyed a winning start to his Super Rugby career after moving to Canberra to take a chance with the Brumbies.
He scored a try in his debut match and has looked threatening every time he touches the ball, but is still fine-tuning his kicking game.
The Force have opted for a scrumhalf switch, with former Brumby Ian Prior coming into the starting side to replace Alby Mathewson.
Cubelli has formed a tag-team combination with Michael Dowsett, while Joe Powell is also pushing for game time.
"We've played two different types of games, I have to focus on other aspects and keep working the running game if the coach likes it," Cubelli said.
"So if the game demands another thing, I can do it. Sometimes there's more opportunities to run, it depends on the defences. I need to my insert myself into games when needed."
Friday: ACT Brumbies v Western Force at nib Stadium, Perth, 10.05pm (AEDT). TV: Live on Fox Sports 2.


text:
Listing Courtesy of Charles Fawver of Fawver Agency
Listing information
- Beds: 2
- Stories: 0
- New Construction: No
- Above Ground Sq. Feet: 1,898
- Lot Size: 139.59 x 135
- School District: Austin #492
- Style: Single Family
- Baths: 3 (Full: 1 3/4: 2 1/2: 0 Other: 0)
- Fireplaces: 3
- Foreclosure: No
- Below Ground Sq. Feet: 1,638
- Estimated Annual Taxes: $2,504
- Year Built: 1950
- Status: Sold on 10/9/2015
- Parking Type Description: Attached 2 cars
- Total Square Footage: 3,536 ($66.21 per sq. foot)
- Lot Area: 0.43
- County: Mower
Air Conditioning Central
Amenities - Exterior Brick/Stone Accent, Driveway - Concrete, In-Grnd Sprklr Sys, Patio, Watering System
Amenities - Interior Bow/Bay Window, Cable, Ceramic Tile, Eat-in Kitchen, Fireplace Footings, Formal Dining Room, French Doors, Kitchen Center Islnd, Kitchen Window, Master Bathroom, Master BR W/I Closet, Multiple Phone Lines, Natural Woodwork, Washer/Dryer Hkups
Appliances Cooktop, Dishwasher, Disposal, Dryer, Exhaust Fan/Hood, Range/Stove, Refrigerator, Washer
Basement Features Partially Finished
Basement Material Poured Concrete
Basement Style Partial, Walk-out
Bath Description 3/4 Basement, 3/4 Master, Main Floor Full Bath
Construction Type Frame/Wood
Dining Eat-in Kitchen, Formal Dining Room
Exterior Wood
Financing Conventional
Fireplace Yes
Fireplace Type Gas
Fuel Electric, Natural Gas, Wood
Garage Type Attached
Heat Baseboard, Forced Air, In-Floor
Lot/Land Description Irregular Lot, Landscaped, Tree Coverage-Medium
Mechanicals Water Heater - Gas, Water Softener - Own
Miscellaneous: DPR Eligible No
Other Finished Above Grade - 1898.00, Finished Below Grade - 800.00, Garage Type: Garage SqFt - 575, Square Feet: Above Ground SqFt - 1898, Square Feet: Below Ground SqFt - 1638, Square Feet: Main Floor SqFt - 1898, Square Feet: Total SqFt - 3536, Tax Year - 2015
Rental License No
Road Frontage City, Curbs & Gutters, Paved
Roof Asphalt Shingles
Sewer City
Special Search Main Floor Bedrooms
Stories 1 Story
Water City
Waterfront No
Waterfront Name None
Bedroom 2 M 11x13
Family Room M 12.6x19.7
Great Room M 23x23.9
Kitchen M 14x18
Master Bedroom M 11x17
Bathroom B x
Rec Room B 19.8x28
Listing Courtesy of Charles Fawver of Fawver Agency


text:
All quotes tagged Possibilities
(4132 quotes found)
"The optimist lives on the peninsula of infinite possibilities; the pessimist is stranded on the island of perpetual indecision."
"Begin to free yourself at once by doing all that is possible with the means you have, and as you proceed in this spirit the way will open for you to do more."
"A desire presupposes the possibility of action to achieve it; action presupposes a goal which is worth achieving."
"If it looks like a duck, and quacks like a duck, we have at least to consider the possibility that we have a small aquatic bird of the family anatidae on our hands."
"Try as much as possible to be wholly alive, with all your might, and when you laugh, laugh like hell and when you get angry, get good and angry. Try to be alive. You will be dead soon enough."


text:
Costruire Siti Web -- 2
Orçamento $1500-3000 USD
The job entail with customizing the [url removed, login to view] Hotel system. The front end is simple to customize but the back end requires an accurate valuable knowledge of OOP in PHP. The candidate should sport a University Degree In Computer Science. We'll provide with more information to those that meet the preliminary requirments.
Thank you.
64 freelancers estão ofertando em média $2409 para este trabalho
Hello Here are my observations for the project - A lot of finer details needs to be hashed out before we submit out final price - If you are available to chat, we would recommend that you message me and we Mais
Let's discuss more about project to finalize the proper scope with estimated cost and time so ping me over the freelancer chat.....I will share some demo as well for recent works if you want to check. You can also c Mais
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I have 6+ years experience and I have done more then 50+ projects in my career.Kindly note I am full feldged developers and work for 17 hours in a day.I am ready to start the project kindly open the private message box Mais


text:
Promotional price valid on web orders only. Your contract pricing may differ. Interested in signing up for a dedicated account number?
Learn More
Learn More
BrandTech BRAND Dispensette III Fixed-Volume Bottle-Top Dispensers
For safe and accurate dispensing of many laboratory liquids, including most acids, bases, salt solutions, scintillation fluids and many organic solvents
Manufacturer: BrandTech 4701221
Specifications Description & Specifications
|≤0.5% ±10μL
|Up to 2.2g/cm3
|45mm Thread, discharge tube, telescoping filling tube, valve mounting tool, polypropylene thread adapters (10mL or smaller units supplied with 24, 28, 33 and 38mm adapters; 25 and 50mL units come with 28, 33 and 38mm adapters; 100mL units come with 33 and 38mL adapters), certificate of performance and operating manual
|Fixed volume, Easy Calibration
|15° to 40°C
|1 Year
|≤0.1% 2μL
|Dispensette™ III Bottletop Dispenser
|Up to 600mbar
|59° to 104°F
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text:
Licensed Contractor, Remodeling, Decks, Basements, Baths & Kitchens. If your looking for your dream deck or just a standard deck have it built the right way with 19 years building decks, wood fences, pergolas, interior remodeling, trim and doors, bathroom, kitchens and basements. Hire a contractor for your project who will be onsite who takes pride in their work not a estimator or sales rep. Licensed contractor with references available.
Call John!


text:
Restraint is a Ring piece of the Bastions of Will set in Diablo III. It requires character level 70 to drop.
Stats (Level 70)Edit
Set Ring
- One of 3 Magic Properties (varies):
- +416–500 Dexterity
- +416–500 Strength
- +416–500 Intelligence
- +4 Random Magic Properties
- Empty Socket
Set Bonuses:
- Casting a resource-generating attack or primary skill grants 50% increased damage for 5 seconds. (2 pieces)
- The first hit with each cast of a resource-spending attack grants 50% increased damage for 5 seconds. (2 pieces)
Restraint was crafted to be an integral part of the set of magical rings known as the Bastion of Will. Each ring bears a raised symbol that denotes its signature power to those with the wisdom to interpret them.


text:
ImaginePeterborough.ca at Wikia
Welcome to the ImaginePeterborough.ca mini wiki at Scratchpad!
You can use the box below to create new pages for this mini-wiki. Make sure you type
[[Category:ImaginePeterborough.ca]] on the page before you save it to make it part of the ImaginePeterborough.ca wiki (preload can be enabled to automate this task, by clicking this link and saving that page. Afterwards, you may need to purge this page, if you still see this message).


text:
Featured Post
FDA approved 1st hybrid closed loop system- Artificial Pancreas Device System
(Source: FDA ) There have been tremendous strides made in the research and development of an Artificial Pancreas Device System. On Septembe...
Thursday, November 12, 2009
A few things that can relieve your stress
Stress happens everyday, whether it be from sitting in traffic, a conversation you just had, or a paper you are trying to finish. There are different types of stress (prolonged, unexpected, and unmanageable). Here are a few ways you can reduce stress:
a) Make sure you exercise. This helps reduce stress hormones. It counts as a antidepressant, fights anxiety, and works as a sleep aid for some people.
b) Elimination of drug use and no more than moderate alcohol use is important. Usually, people use drugs or alcohol as outlets when stressed, but these substances will actually make you feel more stressed.
c) Create predictability at home and at work as much as you can. It provides comfort and familiarity. Think ahead and anticipate the good and bad that could become realities.
A little bit of stress in life is fine. It actually can help ward off sicknesses, but it is possible to have too much stress in your life. If you are feeling overwhelmed, do these things that have been listed and you will start feeling better.
Posted by Brooke Young at 7:42:00 PM
Subscribe to: Post Comments (Atom)


text:
- American Red Cross08.Dec 2015
- Employee
Company culture
Yes and we are encouraged to commend others for there work.
Support from Management
Yes they involve, as well as inform the employees
They even offer classes in order to assist you in collaborative support.
Level of Autonomy
Although the workload is predetermined it is fair.
Gender Equality
Very much so.
Career Development
Excellent opportunities for advancement.


text:
A warm and fulfilling relationship with another human being can be the sustaining center of your life. But often conflicting viewpoints and the stresses of day-to-day living get in the way of fully connecting with your partner. Couples therapy is an in-depth approach from an expert clinician, and can be an ideal solution for couples facing serious problems.
A trained couples therapist can help both of you overcome these and many other emotional obstacles, helping you understand each other, and grow together. You can learn to discuss instead of argue, bond rather than talk past each other.
The couples therapists at PARC have decades of experience and can aid you in finding out what is blocking your communication, opening the channels for true connection, and make your relationship a source of strength, love, and comfort.
We offer couples therapy sessions for premarital couples, unmarried couples, and married couples as well as group therapy with other couples. We also offer marriage counseling.
For advice, tips and insight into forming stronger, happier and more rewarding relationships, explore The PARC Blog.
Please call 212-289-0295 or email us to make an appointment for couples therapy. Our Client Services representative is available to speak with you now.
Many different issues drive couples into opposition and the experienced therapists at PARC can deal with these concerns and many more. Here are some tips to help you tackle some of the more common issues that couples face:
1. Talk with your partner in the same room looking at each other.
2. You are having a discussion, so it is important to listen carefully to the totality of what your partner says and not let yourself answer in your head while he/she is talking.
3. Try to listen to what they say from their perspective so that you totally understand what they are saying before you reply.
4. If you are confused by what they say, clarify it before you respond. You can repeat what you thought they said to be sure you have it correctly. Then respond to what your partner said.
5. Criticizing and/or blaming your partner only escalates a tense situation, so try to use "I" statements, "eg. "I feel…" rather than "You always/never…"
6. Try to remember that you and your partner are in this together; you are working towards the same goal and not against each other.
7. If a disagreement persists, try not to raise your voice at your partner or use harsh language.
8. If a disagreement escalates, agree to take some time out with an agreement to come back together again and reengage in the discussion. Take this time to think about what is upsetting you and not to criticize your partner.
9. Try to put yourself in your partner's shoes. Empathy is crucial to effective communication, so ask yourself how you would feel in your partner's situation, or how you would react to the words being spoken.
10. Go back to step one, but reach out to your partner and say you want to better understand them and what is upsetting them and start again.
1. There is no "raw end of the deal". If you're at home with the baby and your partner is back at work, both of you may find yourselves envying, even feeling resentful of the life each believe the other is living.
Stop! Acknowledge that both worlds have their pluses and minuses. Being envious or resentful of the life the other is living is pointless and damaging. The solution is simply to talk. Tell each other about your days. Ask questions. Ask for advice, opinions, reassurance. Make each other a part of each others' worlds – even when you're physically apart.
2. Share the workload. When you're tired it's easy to feel you're shouldering the lion's share of the workload. Avoid possible resentment by divvying up responsibilities as equally as possible. Decide in advance who will do what and when.
For example, if bottles are an option, then take turns with night-feedings. Don't become the parent who "always" changes the diaper, or soothes the baby when he/she is upset. Be flexible, though. It's not a competition to see who is the most sleep-deprived, or hardworking! Remember – you're a team.
3. Say "thank you" often. Just showing a little appreciation for the effort each other is putting in can do wonders for you both, even at your lowest ebb! A simple "thank you" and a hug from time to time goes a long way. No-one likes to feel taken for granted.
4. Keep intimacy alive. During the intense, exhausting period of looking after a newborn, it's understandable that sexual relations may go on the back burner for a while.
That's fine and perfectly normal. There are plenty of non-sexual ways to be intimate – just cuddling up in the evening, holding hands when you go out and lots of kisses will keep your bond strong when sex is on hold.
5. Ensure Mom gets the support she needs. In the days following the birth of a new baby, Mom is most likely a hormonal rollercoaster. She may be emotional, exhausted and frequently overwhelmed.
The partner's most important job at this point is to look after Mom. She needs emotional as well as practical support – a shoulder to cry on as well as a cheerleader, an extra pair of hands around the house as well as with the baby. Happier Mom equals a happier baby – and a happier relationship
2. Put the situation in perspective. It goes without saying that everyday life can be grueling. The proverbial "straw that broke the camel's back" can result in a full-on argument with your partner. As a result, take a moment and put the situation into perspective.
Ask yourself "why am I angry right now?" Putting an argument into context can allow you to get to the root of your anger and help you resolve the conflict.
3. Remove yourself from the situation. Should the tension begin to escalate and voices become raised, remove yourself from the situation entirely for a "time-out".
Take deep breaths and focus on being still and quiet for a few moments. Once you are calm, you can re-enter the discussion from a practical, rather than emotional perspective in order to come to a resolution.
4. Don't play the blame game. Accusing or castigating your partner in the middle of an argument will only serve to increase the pressure and put them on the defensive.
Couch your statements using "I" instead of "you", eg. "I am feeling this", rather than "You are doing/not doing this". In this way, rather than attacking, you are eliciting empathy – coming from place of vulnerability, rather than blame.
5. Relax yourself. Whilst in the middle of an argument, our bodies get tense and our breathing patterns accelerate. This can strain an argument and cloud the issues at hand.
A simple way to alleviate the tension you may feel is to do some basic breathing exercises. Give yourself a moment and take a deep breath through your nose and hold it for a moment and exhale. Feeling the breath as it enters in and out of your body will break down some of the tension and allow you to focus on your partner and the argument at hand.
Speak To Your Partner About Counseling
3-For-2 Initial Consultation
Call PARC's Client Services at 212-289-0295 to find out more.