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Are you ever disappointed with who your children are?(75 Posts)
This is a very difficult post to write, so bear with me. I am having a tough time at the moment, in particular with my 5 year old DD. Today it came to a head and I made a spectacular mess of things.
We went to a local "sports sampler" camp at our local rec center. Forty-five minutes a week, a different sport each time. Emphasis is on fun - solely - no competitiveness whatsoever. I thought it'd be fantastic - my DD is a very active child, loves the playground, bike rides, gym class, and frankly we need some outlet for her seemingly inexhaustible supply of energy.
She walked in, sat down in the corner of the room and refused to join in. Cried when anyone tried to jolly her into the group. I tried gentle cajoling ("I'm right here", etc) to no avail. We talked briefly about how important is was to try new things, even if they made us a little scared at first, and how we never know if we'll enjoy something until we try. And I told her repeatedly that it doesn't matter if she doesn't do well (in response to her "I can't do it!" the only thing that matters that she tries. If she tries and hates it, we will never play that sport again, etc. Still refuses to stand up, let alone join in.
To my shame, I lost my temper and basically dragged her out of the room by her arm, told her if she didn't get in and join in we would go straight home and she would stay in her room the rest of the day. Obviously not my finest moment. Needless to say, we left. (In case you're wondering why my reaction was so extreme - it's not the first time that she has refused to join in a group sport setting, and this time was the final straw).
On the way home I really let her have it. I told her how disappointing she was to me, because she didn't even try. I know that this is a terrible thing to say, but in my dark moments, that really is how I feel. I look at my daughter and sometimes I struggle to see that she is kind and loving and very outgoing (people often comment on how social she is, she's very much a "leader" in many ways) and all I see is a stubborn, lazy child. I know that's not fair to her. When I was a child I would have killed for the opportunities she has (such as the sport sampler camp) and it drives me insane that she just turns her nose up at it.
I know the problem is primarily me, but I am really struggling to deal with these feelings. The early part of my life was something of a struggle and I was constantly "out of my comfort zone", and I just had to get on with it. I sometimes wonder if this is why I am so irritated by her refusal to do anything that causes even a modicum of discomfort.
I am going to be blunt here- if you do want her to do things out of her comfort zone then you will need to support and encourage her not shout and belittle her .
Just my opinion but I honestly think you need to re consider your views and let her be a wee girl with a happy childhood.
I've a 5 yo DS who is not a joiner at all - e.g. will not do summer play schemes, swimming lessons etc and has been like this from a young toddler. I'm not disappointed in who he is at all, but sad for him that he finds these things difficult.
I also wish he would join things, there are so many wonderful things for them to do. I'm sure it is partly projection that I would like to do those things in his place, and also it is actually very frustrating because I know he finds it so difficult but if he could just get over the initial discomfort he would enjoy them, so he is missing out and I wish I could find a way to help him over his shyness - this is why I've pushed a little bit, e.g. signing up for the swimming anyway and giving it a few weeks but to no avail.
He's not doing it to be awkward, he just is deeply averse to those situations. At school he's found an environment where he feels secure and trusts the adults and is blossoming - will now join clubs and afterschool activities in that environment only, which is great.
And as others have said 5 is very young to expect them to do these activities, even though many kids take to it so well.
Blimey poor kid
Thank you, all of you, for your comments. You have really given me food for thought. I certainly knew that my behaviour today was shameful, but some of the other comments have been really helpful. It's always good to get an outsider's perspective, I struggle to see it when I'm in the moment, as it were.
i think you need to take a step back & without making you feel bad, have a think about your reaction.
Anger is the emotion you mentioned that you felt, whilst it can be difficult when you're in the thick of it, anger seems extreme in the context of the situation you've described.
she's 5 & was being pushed to join in with strangers & had an angry mummy to deal with too, all sounds very stressful for a small child to deal with.
Yes, add "she's only 5" to your mantras, but also add "she's not me".
I think that maybe you think she should be more like you - or more like you wish you were? She never will be - she's her own person, and like the rest of us, she's flawed. But I bet for every time she's lazy or unadventurous, there are times she's sweet and thoughtful.
Try and spend some quality time with her - something you both like doing. Try to have a laugh, a bit of fun with her - I don't doubt that you love her, but we don't all always like our children, and that's what you've got to find again.
Message withdrawn at poster's request.
I'm never disappointed with who my children are, they are individuals rather than copies of me. It is your job to try and understand your daughter rather than turn her into something else. Poor thing.
Personally I think sport is shit, but I hide that very well when I watch my 6 year old son playing tennis (his choice).
Goodness, give her a break. Your post made me sad. You say she has an inexhaustible supply of energy, so I don't see how she can be lazy. It sounds like quite an intimidating setting for a 5 year old - trying something new every week. I used to give music lessons to a 5 year old and I was surprised that even with me, who he saw every week and in his own home, he was still scared of trying something new - and that was all based around the same instrument. Gosh, it makes me sad to think that she was worried about trying a new sport and then got told off for feeling that way.
Do you want her to remember how disappointing you found her? How lazy you thought she was?
How she didn't live up to your expectations?
Because she will.
Hear hear to Expat.
With every post you make I feel sorrier for your poor DD
Go give her a cuddle, apologise and then let her be...
I would probably feel exactly the same way that you are, Anglo. I expect you've done the gentle cajoling, the supporting to take part and now you are at the end of your patience.
I maybe wouldn't have laid into my daughter in the car but I certainly would have felt like it. Children are such ungrateful scrotes sometimes and it only gets worse as they get older - it's natures way of making us let go of them as they approach adulthood.
You've had a bad day with her, it might not have been your finest hour but take a deep breath, regroup and face tomorrow afresh. I'd maybe put the sports camp on hold until next time and try it again later.
Oh dea, oh dear. Sorry but this is awful
Your poor child.
Yes, the problem is you.
Never in a million years, is she going to be you.
And that is what you are trying to make her be. You.
I clicked on this thread expecting it to be from a parent with a teenager that's gone off the rails, a mother driven to the brink of despair by a son who steals or something like that, not a 5 year old that doesn't want to join in a game!
Don't be too hard on yourself - a lot of these comments will be hard to take, but remember: tomorrow is another day!
It's going to become a vicious circle though isn't it? You go and try a new venture with her, she's a little shy and hesitant, you react in the way that you did today, the next new venture becomes an even bigger obstacle in her eyes.
Do you say 'no' to screen time? I wonder if allowing her to be bored would encourage her to be more active? When my children were little we had no CBBC or CITV to watch so they were limited in when there was stuff they wanted to watch on TV, I was strict with the amount of time they were allowed to watch videos and I found that them being bored encouraged them to go outside and play.
Message withdrawn at poster's request.
Op you were out of order here (but I think you know that)
Does your dd have a natural flair for sports? Out of interest what sorts of sports were on offer?
I think everyone needs to find a balance in life yes it's important that dd exercises but it is import that she loves doing it. If she enjoys it it will become life long if she is forced she will retaliate against it at the first opportunity
I think your desire to give her opportunities is getting in the way of her being a kid. Do you do stuff together both physical like bike ridding together and making cards or baking? She needs to find her passions they may be the same as your or totally out of your comfort zone
You made a mess if today but you can turn it round tomorrow what about asking her what she would like to try and see if you can sort it? Ie my should runs a karate class specifically for parents and their kids together (he runs others to) this one is more fun iyswim
Kids see us as there comfort zone and we need to help give them a good sense of self
The thing I am most proud of is my kids I hope one day you will know what I mean
Go and give dd a kiss even if she is asleep
Expat sorry for the hijack. I can't believe its been a year. I only knew you both through your threads but your dd changed me forever. The strength of every one of your family is and was amazing.
spoomoo yes, you're not wrong about the comments. Although many are deserved, they do not make for easy reading. Perhaps that's what I need, though.
To answer some other questions - we have started limiting screen time down to 30 minutes a day (I always liked to keep it to an hour a day but that has been creeping up to two, which I was unhappy about.)
And yes, anger is the root of most of this. I'm angry all the time, and I'm not even sure why half the time. But that's for another post..
She's not stubborn and lazy, she's nervous and scared.
Let her watch a couple of sessions before expecting her to join in.
I had a similar moment when DS1 refused to join in with tennis lessons. I told him if he didn't take part I would put the racket I'd recently bought him in the bin, which I did as we were leaving.
It was a nice new racket, and I had to then go back and get it, saying I would give it to some child who would appreciate it.
Looking back, it was my most twattish parenting moment ever.
I think
I we have high expectations of our own children, much higher than we would of other peoples children. I have no idea why.
I bet you are a lovley mummy the rest of the time.
The problem is not "primarily you", it's all you. You are being a pushy Mum, setting your poor DD for a lifetime of feeling a failure. You are there to protect her and make her feel safe. You are her number one provider of comfort and love. If you continue like this, you will be letting her down. Terribly. Say sorry, and mean it. Your poor little child.
Hugs to Expat.
Sweetie I'm sorry if you feel attacked its not meant if you feel angry most of the time it must be horrid for you. I just want to say this the most awful time I ever had in my life (which has not been a piece of cake) was living with some one that was angry all of the time. Please please consider seeing your g p and asking for some counciling to try and get to the bottom of your anger I promise it will help you and your dd
The early part of my life was something of a struggle and I was constantly "out of my comfort zone", and I just had to get on with it. I sometimes wonder if this is why I am so irritated by her refusal to do anything that causes even a modicum of discomfort.
You are repeating your childhood. You knew she wasn't a joiner in yet you took her anyway.
Why would you want you child to feel discomfort.
That being said, it is hard to stand back and allow your 5 year old to make choices. It has been said she is only 5, but she is able to let you know her likes and dislikes. You should apologise and spend time with her expending her energy in ways you both enjoy.
(Also, maybe she doesn't like the size of the rec centre? Too big and echoey?)
I would hate to come on here and put my parenting mistakes out there, very brave of you! Proves you are aware and don't want to repeat your childhood.
Anglo I had perhaps a similar experience with my 5yo for whom I'd booked swimming lessons for a week. Day 1 she got in and went through the motions. Day 2 she wouldn't even put her costume on! Cue cajoling, bribery, anger ....nothing worked. We had to come home. I was spitting feathers. All that money! But also I'd been excited about her swimming - had done a lot of research to find the right pool and teacher. I really lost it. But I'd invested too much emotional energy in it myself and I was an idiot. She was only 5
So yes you did the wrong thing. But you know that. And yes it's you not her. But you know that too. But don't be too hard on yourself. We're all out of order sometimes. And it seems like you've taken ownership of this problem and want to fix it. Not sure what next step is though. Counselling to help you let go of your own lost childhood? Good luck and don't fret too much. Just go and kiss her and have fun together next time.
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University Forum
When Monday November 18, 2013 @ 10:00 AM (1346 days ago)
Where Lehman Auditorium, Lehman Auditorium
Duration 1 hour 30 minutes
All faculty and staff are invited and encouraged to attend the University Forum at 10 – 11:30 a.m. on Monday, November 18. Please note the location change: this meeting will be held in Lehman Auditorium. The meeting will begin with a brief time of worship followed by an update on the Suter Science Center campaign and a president's update. There will also be opportunity for Q & A.
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Yes, it is not clear what the assests are. I only just found out about this "cottage by the ocean" by a slip of the tongue when my two sisters talked about it. There is also a storage unit that my sister claims she does not know what the contents are. I doubt she is telling the truth. My mother was an artistic craftperson all her life and
I would say her work belongs in a gallery. I have already consulted an attorney and wrote my sister for full disclosure. I am waiting for her to repl;y, just to see what she does.
I thought probate is only filed if there is a will. ?????
PS I have not retained this attorney yet.
Probate is needed if there are any assets titled in the decedent's name alone, whether there is a Will or not.
that is interesting to know, thank you. Doesnt it also mean that my sister cannot claim everything?
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thank you, my sister claims there isnt a will, but that she has been named "Executor". She doesn't realize what that means. All she thinks is power power power to CHOOSE who gets what. She sent me a box of junk just to insult me. I read from researching it that she is not supposed to be distributing ANYHING yet until she inventories everything and send each heir a copy. I'm not sure if this is true in Oregon as laws differ from state to state, but if it is maybe I should just sit back and let her hang herself.
Right now I am concernered with getting Justice for my mother, who died under horrible circumstances and I want the person who is responsible to be held accountable.
In most states, there can only be an executor is there is a Will. Otherwise, the person in that role is called an administrator. Michigan does not use either of these terms, and I am not sure about Oregon. In any case, the person in that role only gets authority by being appointed by the court.
That person is also the only one legally authorized to pursue wrongful death or other lawsuits on behalf of the estate.
Yes, the person in charge has power. But she would also have responsibilities, to the extent that she can be personally liable if she messes up.
That was supposed to read "if" there is a Will.
thank you. The only question is that nobody but her knows what is in storage. I asked for some family picture and she claimed she didnt know where they were, then produced a picture of my mother from one of those albums.
I guess I can't do anything about what is in storage if I dont even know where it's at.
I think any other assests will be "held" until probate--such as moneys, investments, life insurance, real estate, etc. correct?
Why would she claim there is no will? Perhaps she just doesn't have a copy and hasnt figured out where to look, or else she is being secretive like always. She said she expects to "get something out of this", meaning payment for her time and labor. That's not the role of executor, according to what I read.
I guess she thinks she can do all this without paying for an attorney, but she hasnt even figured out that attorney's fees would come from the estate.
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Only the executor/administrator can pursue a wrongful death claim. And yes, that person can charge for his or her time. Sounds like a lot of tough things to work through on this one. I am very sorry for all the added "stuff" in addition to the loss of your mother.
Money aside, I called the police and finally got through to one of them. It is going to be investigated. I also called the Health Dept. as this is a communicable disease and must be reported by law. They will also investigate to find the source. I asked my sister to have an autopsy done but it's too late now.
Ha. She is also P>O>A. of my mother's surviving spouse, who is in an expensive assisted livinf facility. Imagine the irony if they arrest him. According to her, there's not much left in the "joint" account.
I thank you for giving me your time. Let's see what law enforcement does now.
You are very welcome. Regardless of the outcome with the police, I hope that you and your family are able to find peace once this is over with.


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text:
Summer 2004, Vol. 1, No. 1
Numbers 11 and a Pentecostal Theology of Church Leadership
D. Cotton, Th.D.
of Old Testament at Assemblies of God Theological Seminary
Printer Friendly Version (PDF,Download
In this day of specialization, it seems we have a difficult
time combining thorough Bible study and relevant practical
application. Too often, practitioners do not get their
principles from studying the Bible, and scholars do not
produce relevant principles and practical application.
I would like this essay to begin a dialogue that will bring
these two together.
I will use Numbers 11 to demonstrate how we can derive
relevant principles for our lives and ministry from
an Old Testament text. My goal is to experience God
speaking to us through such texts. The key is one of
the distinctive attitudes of Pentecostalism—the
Bible should be read as precedent for what God
wants to do in our lives today. If God did it before
He can do it again. To hear His voice clearly from
such texts and apply their precedents the way He intends,
we must read them carefully in context and see the
principles in what God was saying to the original audience.
Then, we can take those principles and, with the Holy
Spirit's guidance, apply them
appropriately to our lives today. God wants us to
learn how He related to Israel in their situations
and how they responded (1 Cor. 10:6, 11).
This is how I believe we should do biblical theology.
My definition of "doing" biblical theology,
then, is determining the message of the biblical writers
in their terms, letting them express their theology
in their own literary and cultural language, style
and concepts. I believe biblical theology is the culmination
of good exegesis or interpretation. It comes before
systematic theology or doctrine, which is the application
of the truths to our questions today. We must first
strive to hear what the Bible writer was preaching
to Israel in that day and then we can begin to hear,
from the Bible text, what God is saying to us today.
In this, I believe a Pentecostal approach also means
we should be open in faith to whatever supernatural
applications the LORD wants to make.
The Context of Numbers 11
In doing biblical theology, it is essential to describe
carefully and analytically the context of a passage
within the flow of the message of the whole book and,
ultimately, within the message of the whole Bible.
The broad principles of the message should be clearly
articulated. I believe, then, we should understand
the context of Numbers 11 as the journey of God's people, Israel, from Sinai,
where they were established as his covenant nation, through
the wilderness to the Promised Land, where God would use
them to bring the Savior into the world. They were on a
mission in this world with eternal purpose. They were God's
newly established nation to provide a people through whom
the Son of God, the Savior, could become incarnate. In
Numbers 1-10, God instructed Israel through Moses on organization
and holiness in preparation for the journey. With his holy
presence among them and leading them, they would come to
the place where they would be able to fulfill God's
purpose. The end of chapter 10 records they began with
great faith and enthusiasm.
However, the inevitable trials and testing of their faith
began in chapter 11 with some unspecified hardships. The
people complained and were dealt with by God. Moses interceded,
and the judgment ended. Then, stirred up by the dissatisfaction
of some non-Israelites among them, the people wailed about
the food they left in Egypt and the manna the LORD was
graciously, miraculously providing for them in the wilderness.
The LORD became very angry, and Moses, responding to both
God and the people, became very troubled.
Moses, as the leader, began to focus on the pressures
from the people, the circumstances and his own ability.
In both Moses' and the people's complaints,
the Hebrew uses the same word behind the NIV words "trouble" and "ruin." In
their experiences of pain and hardship, leader and people
had become complainers against the goodness of God. Moses
listened to the demands of the people, looked at his own
ability and resources, and concluded that the burden on
him was too great and he would rather die than continue
toward his "own ruin" (verse 15, NIV).
He described it as a parent or nursemaid carrying all
Israel like babies through the wilderness. His sense
of divine calling and enabling for mission forgotten,
Moses even expressed disbelief that the LORD could
provide enough meat to feed the people.
God's Answer—Pentecost
God's answer was not simply to send meat, although
he did so by a wind from him, which is the same word as
spirit. Neither was it to answer Moses' request to
kill him. The LORD's answer was to put his Spirit,
which was on Moses, on seventy other leaders. They were
to help him bear the burden of the people, so they could
continue on their mission. When the Spirit came upon the
seventy, they prophesied, but did not continue to do it.
Moses exhorted Joshua not to be jealous for him when two
of the seventy leaders received the Spirit apart from the
rest. Then he expressed the wish that all God's
people would receive the Spirit and be prophets.
This is the first extended reference to the
Spirit of God in the Bible. Contained in it is the
only wish expressed by Moses, perhaps the only wish
in the Old Testament for God's people's
spiritual endowment: "I
wish that all the LORD's people were prophets
and that the LORD would put his Spirit on them!" (Num.
11: 29, NIV). The biblical idea of prophets was people
who were privileged to have such intimate contact and
communion with God that they were used as his spokespersons.
Thus, this passage describes a significant interconnectedness
of the Spirit of God and leadership and the ministry
of God's people and prophetic activity. The result
is that in Numbers 11, we have one of the most significant
references to the Holy Spirit in the Old Testament
and the whole Bible. Numbers 11 should be viewed as
the foundational Pentecostal/charismatic passage in
the Old Testament, even though commentators generally
have given little attention to it.
Therefore, I agree with the proposal of Wilf Hildebrandt
and believe that the description of this event in Numbers
11 strongly suggests it is intended as a paradigm or
prime example of what should be expected for all God-ordained
leadership.1 The
principles here should be considered normative for
all God's
leaders. Furthermore, the wish that all God's people
would experience the Spirit's prophetic empowering
for ministry is precisely what Joel later predicted would
happen and Peter declared as being fulfilled at Pentecost.
Hildebrandt and Stronstad see Moses' wish for the
Spirit-gift for all as "programmatic" for the
scriptural revelation of God's plan for all who
believe in him, looking ahead to the New Testament
age.2 This
pictured what God would provide in the "last days" through
Christ. Further support for this intent in Numbers 11 can
be seen in the occurrence of the two from the seventy prophesying
in the camp. They were listed among the seventy elders
but they did not go to the tent. God still put his Spirit
on them, which elicited the concern of Joshua, to which
Moses responded with the wish. This strongly suggests that
God in His sovereignty wanted this empowering, prophetic,
experience of his Spirit to move beyond any leadership
establishment to the general population of believers. Numbers
11 provided for the leaders of Israel what God wants for
all His covenant people. Thus, it was intended to be both
paradigmatic and programmatic. Just as Numbers 11 involved
empowering for ministry and facilitating the purpose of
God for his people under the old covenant, so the Acts
2 event empowered the people of God in the New Testament
to be his witnesses. As the elders of Israel were shown
to have prophetic intimacy with God, so all God's
people, after the coming of the Messiah, were to be so
intimate with God that they would be "the prophethood
of all believers,"3 as
well as the priesthood of all believers. God desires an
intimate relationship with all who will receive him that
involves empowering by his Spirit to speak for him, be
his witnesses, and fulfill his purpose in the world.
There are many implications here for the lives and
ministries of God's people today. As I described the context
and overview of the events of Numbers 11, probably various
topics relevant to the lives of God's people were
evident to many readers. Teachings such as: the journey
of God's people; group dynamics occurring on such
a journey; challenges, trials and temptations to God's
people on his mission; stresses in the ministry; the walk
of faith; God's goals for his people; prophecy; the
Holy Spirit; and the one I have chosen for this essay,
leadership in the ministry of God's people can
be derived.
I want to propose, based on careful study of Numbers
11, the following principles for us as leaders among
people today. My hope is that the Holy Spirit will
use this to stimulate your thinking in this area
and that you will refine what I present, contribute
more principles and communicate them with me. My
greater purpose is to encourage you to do the same
kind of biblical theological principlizing of Bible
passages in your ministries.
The first truth or principle I see in this text is
that there will be problems on our "journey" for
the LORD. Various hardships and challenges to basic needs
will arise. God's people may turn on the leader and,
out of fear or greed, make unreasonable demands. One common
pressure will be the apparent discrepancy between the work
needing to be done and the workers and resources to do
it. The answer, as we have seen and will discuss further,
is the gift of God's Spirit.
The second principle is that, in these problems among
God's people on the journey, leaders are often tempted
to focus on themselves for the answer. However, the text
teaches that the answer is not in our resources or us but
in God and his Spirit working in and through us. It may
sound simplistic, but Numbers 11 says the answer to the
problems of our ministries is Pentecost. God's ministry
and mission are always accomplished by the working of his
Spirit (as we affirm from Zechariah 4:6). But what does
this mean in practical terms? It means that we must keep
turning our eyes away from the circumstances and ourselves
back to God and never lose the sense of awe and dependence
on his power and wisdom, and never let go of our belief
in his goodness. In good Pentecostal tradition, we need
to listen to God's voice, get a word from him
and obey it in faith. Such a word will be in line with
what he has already revealed in the Scriptures and
will honor him for his holy character.
Third, the text teaches that all who are called by
God have his Spirit at work in them. This is the implication
from the sudden reference to the Holy Spirit here.
According to Numbers 11:17, Moses had the Spirit on
him all along to enable him to accomplish God's
purpose even though nothing was said about the Spirit
and Moses before this. Perhaps we should have picked
up that this was an ancient assumption from the references
to Joseph in Genesis 41:38 and to Bezalel and Oholiab
in Exodus 31:3; 35:31. They were said to have God's
Spirit given to them for wisdom and ability to carry
out their important, leadership functions. Later passages,
such as 1 Samuel 16:3, show that God sent his Spirit
upon those he established as his leaders. Thus, we
should realize that whether the Bible explicitly mentions
the Spirit or not God intends us to assume the Pentecostal
understanding that his work is to be done in the power
of his Spirit. Again, the description of this event
in Numbers 11 seems to be intended as a paradigm/example
of what should be expected for all God-ordained leadership.4 The
experience of this will be discussed later.
The fourth principle I see here is that it is no problem
for God to distribute the burden among others beyond us
(and the rest of the weary 10 percent who typically do
90 percent of the work of the church) and enable those
others to carry the burden with us. He called for seventy
elders to provide the help Moses needed. That number was
probably symbolic to them of the full representation of
the group of people involved (see Genesis 10 and Exodus
1:5). God wants us to realize he can empower the full number
we need. Perhaps he waits until we realize our need and
are willing to relinquish our exclusive hold on the power,
just like waiting to create Eve until Adam felt his need.
We also must realize we lose nothing when God does this;
we only gain.
The fifth principle, then, as we read on in the LORD's
instruction to Moses here, is that leaders must gather
the workers God wants from those already known to
be leaders among the people. God did not force on the
people new leaders who were strange to them. God calls
us to recruit and to use wisdom in our organization
of his people for effective ministry and mission. Note
also that, throughout most of his ministry, Moses was
mentoring Joshua to be his successor.
The sixth thing I see about God's answer is that
it was not a quick fix for the immediate felt need but
the long term solution to all such stresses in the ministry
and missionary journey of his people. He did meet the immediate
need but dealt with their sin with judgment. However, the
focus was on the greater need—Spirit-empowered
The seventh principle is that God's leaders
and people should expect the Pentecostal experience
of prophetic empowering for his mission. Numbers 11
amazingly prefigures Pentecost. The LORD put his Spirit
on the seventy, and they prophesied as he publicly
established them in their support ministry with Moses.
The prophesying was an observable sign to all the people
that God was working supernaturally by his Spirit in
their lives and had chosen them for this ministry.
In this passage, the verb nab'a,
to prophesy, is not in its usual form but in the hitpael stem.
This form of the verb was used of visible, physical
demonstrations of some kind, involving prophetic speech,
with no mention of the content. As in 1 Samuel 10:5-6,
10; 18:10; 19:20-24; and 1 Kings 18:29, the observable
experience testified to contact with God's presence.
Milgrom, Ashley, Walton and Matthews have observed
that the choice of this form of the verb in Numbers
11 strongly suggests God used a visible, Spirit-empowering,
prophetic event to confirm his authorization of,5 power
upon,6 and
intimate involvement in these leaders' ministries
To Wenham and Walton, the experience sounds much like
that of the 120 at Pentecost in Acts 2. Wenham goes
so far as to say, "As
with Saul, the prophecy described here was probably
an unintelligible ecstatic utterance, what the New
Testament terms speaking in tongues. "7 That
seems to be a viable possibility here. However, the
clear point is that some kind of observable prophetic
experience was a known sign of the Spirit's empowering
for leadership ministry.
Thus, as Stronstad has also pointed out,8 a
divinely initiated, prophetic-speech event in both
Numbers 11 and Acts 2 was clearly presented as evidence
to the observers that the Spirit was working in those
chosen for a ministry function. Therefore, I conclude
that Numbers 11 strongly supports a concept of initial,
observable evidence of the empowering of a believer
to fulfill God's
purpose as a witness for the Lord. The public demonstration
in Numbers 11 was a one-time occurrence for a sign
(verse 25). However, Levine makes a good point that, "Their
ecstasy was a passing experience, but their status,
and presumably their new competence, were permanent."9
The biblical idea of prophetic speech was that it
was a communication flowing from an intimate communion
with the LORD. Prophets were people who were privileged
to have such intimate contact with God that they were
allowed to be his spokespersons. The experience of
Spirit coming upon a person for ministry and mission
is shown consistently to be a prophetic one of intimate
communion with the LORD in the Spirit and communication
from him by the Spirit.
The eighth point that needs to be made is that leaders
must not think we can or need to control the distribution
of the Spirit. In Numbers 11, not all who received
this experience of the Spirit did so in the official
way, at the designated place. God had called them to
come before the place of his presence at the Tabernacle,
before the congregation, but two did not make it. However,
God still put his Spirit on them in the camp. Joshua
called for Moses to stop them (verse 28). In contrast,
Moses made it clear that there was no need to be jealous
for his authority and he expressed the wish that all
people would be prophetically empowered by the Spirit.
Therefore, all leaders should relinquish self-serving,
narrow-minded restrictions over who may minister.
Of course, all workers and leaders must be proven,
solid disciples, but we must not fail to release people
to the ministries God wants for them because of our
insecurities and clinging to control. Sometimes only
10 percent are doing all the work because leaders have
an unhealthy need to be indispensable. We must be open
to God working in ways that cut across our pride and
rigid traditions. Pentecost has always offended extremely
controlling types. Real freedom from the stresses of
ministry comes when we give control over to God. Leaders
are to bring order and direction to a group but they
must not make those decisions on their own and must
never think or act as though they have the power in
themselves. We should simply act as obedient messengers
from the LORD. Furthermore, no human is given authority
to control the transfer of the Spirit to others. God
transferred the Spirit from Moses to the seventy; Moses
did not do it.
Finally, the ninth important truth I see from Numbers
11 for us as leaders is that we must have the heart
of God and look forward to His goals, as Moses did
here at the end of this passage. Moses looked ahead
to Pentecost and expressed the heart of God in the
wish that all his people would be prophets and have
the Holy Spirit on them to provide that intimate communion
with Him and experience of his power for His mission
in this world. Moses modeled a leader's return to the faith that focuses on God's
promises and to leadership that helps the people move toward
God's goals. If we will yield to the heart cry of
God we will seek to see all God's people in ministry
for him, empowered by his Spirit. If this is truly our
heart's desire we will work to organize the church
or ministry we lead in a way that encourages such a wide
distribution of ministry. Pentecost is a grass-roots, non-elitist,
movement. God's goal is that all his people would
participate in his work on earth. When we are truly Pentecostal,
we expect God to empower other people to accomplish the
mission. That lifts the false burden of self-sufficiency.
Seeing God work supernaturally in his people also helps
one keep perspective and faith. It seems to be a result
of the Spirit-event of Numbers 11 that Moses resumed his
patient intercession for the people. Ashley, in his commentary,
suggests, "Perhaps the experience of the shared
Spirit is ever the antidote for the weary, harried,
threatened leader."10 Numbers
11 points us to Pentecost as God's answer to our
stresses in ministry and challenges in leadership. It also
helps keep us focused beyond ourselves on God's
mission to reach the world with the gospel of Jesus
I conclude that Numbers 11 teaches that the big question
is not what will I be able to accomplish in my leadership
ministry or will I come up with the "winning plan" for
my ministry. It is rather, will I trust God and be led
by him? Will I be thoroughly and consistently Pentecostal?
Will I have God's priority of seeing all his
people functioning as Spirit-filled, prophetic ministers?
Numbers 11 is truly a foundational passage for Pentecostal
church leadership. What else do you see God saying here?
1. Wilf Hildebrandt, An
Old Testament Theology of the Spirit of God (Peabody,
MA: Hendrickson, 1995), 110.
2. Roger Stronstad, The
Charismatic Theology of St. Luke (Peabody, MA:
1984 ), 17, 22; Hildebrandt, 110, 157-158. "Paradigm" is
an outstanding example, an archetype, a model, or a picture
of what is intended for all in parallel situations. "Programmatic" refers
to a plan or pattern of actions and experiences leading
to a goal or desired result.
3. See
Roger Stronstad, The
Prophethood of all Believers: A Study in Luke's
Charismatic Theology. (Sheffield, UK: Sheffield
Academic Press, 1999).
4. Wilf Hildebrandt, An
Old Testament Theology of the Spirit of God (Peabody,
MA: Hendrickson, 1995), 110.
5. Jacob Milgrom, The
JPS Torah Commentary: Numbers (Philadelphia: The
Jewish Publication Society, 1990), 380, 383; and Timothy
R. Ashley, The Book of Numbers, NICOT (Grand Rapids:
Eerdmans, 1993), 214.
6. John H. Walton and
Victor H. Matthews, The IVP Bible Background Commentary:
Genesis-Deuteronomy (Downers Grove, IL: InterVarsity,
1997), 186.
7. Gordon J. Wenham, Numbers:
An Introduction and Commentary, TOTC, (Downers Grove,
IL: InterVarsity Press, 1981), 109. Walton and Matthews,
8. Roger Stronstad, The
Charismatic Theology of St. Luke (Peabody, MA: 1984
), 22.
9. Baruch A. Levine, Numbers
1-20, AB (New York: Doubleday, 1993), 340.
10. Ashley, 217
Friday, June 16, 2006 10:22 AM


text:
WASHINGTON (AP) Fourteen "high value" terrorism suspects at the Guantanamo Bay, Cuba, naval prison have been offered the right to ask for attorneys, The Washington Post reported.
The move could allow the suspects to join other detainees in challenging their status as "enemy combatants" in a U.S. appeals court, the newspaper reported in its Friday editions.
The prisoners include Khalid Sheikh Mohammed, the alleged mastermind of the 9/11 attacks. They have had no access to lawyers while they were being held at Guantanamo or at secret CIA prisons overseas. They were transferred to the U.S. facility at Guantanamo last year.
The prisoners have been entitled to military "personal representatives" to assist them during the process that determined whether they were enemy combatants.
U.S. officials have argued against allowing the prisoners access to lawyers without special security precautions out of fear that elements of the CIA's secret detention program or its interrogation techniques could be revealed.
A 2005 law gives Guantanamo Bay captives the right to challenge their enemy combatant status in the U.S. Court of Appeals for the District of Columbia Circuit.
A form given to the Guantanamo detainees in late August and early September allowed them to request that the American Bar Association find them a lawyer, at no charge, to assist them in challenging the determination that they are enemy combatants, the newspaper said. At least four of the detainees already have requested attorneys, according to people familiar with the process the Post did not identify.
William H. Neukom, the ABA's president, criticized the use of the organization's name on the form, telling government lawyers that the ABA did not want to "lend support and credibility to such an inadequate review scheme," the Post said.
A Pentagon spokesman, Navy Cmdr. J.D. Gordon, told the newspaper: "These counsel will be permitted to visit the detainee and engage in confidential written communications with the detainee once the counsel has obtained the necessary security clearance" and agrees to special court rules.
The Post quoted defense and intelligence officials as saying the offer of attorneys does not represent a change in policy.
"It was the intent and the plan all along that they would have the right to counsel," a senior intelligence official told the newspaper.
Copyright 2007 The Associated Press. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten or redistributed.
Conversation guidelines: USA TODAY welcomes your thoughts, stories and information related to this article. Please stay on topic and be respectful of others. Keep the conversation appropriate for interested readers across the map.


text:
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text: With the wicked weather we've had this fall I was wondering if most/some of you charge a small fee when you show up to mow and there's small branches,limbs, other debris that needs to be cleared b4 mowing can start. I;m not referring to a couple of minutes but rather if you have to spend 10 minutes or more clearing the property. I do add a small charge for this as doing this for nothing on all properties results in at least an hour or more per day that I dont care to lose in billed services. Usually its $10 to $15.


text:
Alyson Hannigan, Husband Welcome Second Baby Girl
Congratulations to "How I Met Your Mother" star and "Buffy The Vampire Slayer" alum Alyson Hannigan - she's now a mother herself twice over.
The ginger cutie's rep confirmed to E! Online this afternoon that she and husband Alexis Denisof ushered three-year-old Satyana's baby sister into the world today, and that both mother and daughter are doing fine.
Also, it further's the tradition of Hannigan being a mother of substance. In Sanskrit, "Satyana" means "truth" or "true." So to keep up the tradition of her children's names actually meaning something, the couple named their latest addition Keeva Jane Denisof.
"Keeva" is a variation on the Gaelic word caoimhe, meaning "gentleness and beauty." Here's hoping it's a harbinger of growing up the spitting image of her pretty, quirky and kind mom.
"[Being a mom] has changed me in every way because my life is so much greater," Hannigan told Us Weekly way back in 2010. "It filled a void I never knew was there - it's the most amazing experience of my life. I just feel so blessed to be on this journey, to be a mommy."
It seems that, porbably to "How I Met Your Mother" fans, Hannigan's pregnancies have become somewhat pivotal events. When she was building up to welcoming she and Denisof's first child, she was written temporarily off of "Mother" in an arc wherein Barney offends her with a particularly raunchy joke and she abstains from the gang in disgust. This time around, it was written into this past season as she and Marshal awaited their first child...which, of course, Barney got a hand in naming.
How I Met Your Mother, Buffy The Vampire Slayer


text:
[Date Index]
[Thread Index]
[Author Index]
Memory usage - Extract vs Select
Does anyone know what is the most memory efficient way to manipulate
large data sets (200,000 rows and 40 columns) ? I use extract, but
suspect Select may be more efficient.
Also, is there a way to tell how much memory is being used by a
mathematica command ?


text:
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text:
Michael Moore urges Australian regime change
New York correspondent
New York
Page Tools
Michael Moore.
Michael Moore made his latest documentary, Fahrenheit 9/11, because he wants to get rid of US President George Bush. But he also wants Australian voters to get rid of John Howard.
At a news conference for foreign correspondents in New York, Moore said Mr Howard's decision to get "in bed" with Mr Bush was "disgraceful", and he hoped that after seeing his film Australian voters would seek "regime change".
"I get a lot of mail from Australia," Moore said. "I probably get per capita more mail from Australia than from any other country. A lot of angry Australians, I never realised how angry, and I don't think just because they are living in Australia, right?
"No, I mean, I realise, it's like, you're living on an island, but you're also a country, but you're also a continent. So I know there's a lot of confusion there, right? But what's confusing to me is, how is it that someone like John Howard could get in bed with George W. Bush?
"Not to give Mr Howard too much credit, but he at least appears to have half a brain. Half, I said. Half. I'm being generous. But, I mean, what is he doing with George W. Bush? It's really disgraceful.
"And the Australian people, according to all the polls, don't approve of being part of the coalition of the willing. And I hope the same thing happens to (Howard) that happened to the leader of Spain."
Spain's prime minister Jose Maria Aznar was defeated at the polls in March after terrorist attacks in Madrid killed more than 190 people. Mr Aznar supported the war in Iraq; his successor does not.
"I hope that Australians who see this film will say to themselves we need some regime change here, in our country," Moore said.
Then, his mobile phone rang. Moore looked at its screen and said: "Oh, its John Howard!"
Later he returned to the theme of regime change, saying: "I think the Spanish started it. They threw out their prime minister who didn't listen to the will of the people and it's my sincere hope that the Australians, the Italians, the others who joined Mr Bush in this war will also be removed by the citizens of their countries. And I hope this film helps to do that."
Fahrenheit 9/11 opens in Australia next week. In the US it has taken $US60 million ($A84 million), breaking all records for a documentary.
Moore is unlikely to visit Australia to promote the film. "We have an election coming up here, and we decided that every day spent outside the US was a day away from our mission," he said. "I hope that people understand that our priority had to be focusing on what's happening here, so we can do our best to remove Mr Bush from the White House."
Moore was asked about the Bush Administration's reaction to his film and whether he had received any threats. "As far as threats, I don't know of any. So far, I seem to be OK. Actually, that will be a great soundbite for you when they find me floating in the river next week."


text:
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On Fri, 24 Jul 1998 02:45:37 -0700 (PDT), Misha Wolf wrote:
> It is my understanding that the next version of the Nescape browser will
> display the page correctly without this help from the user.
FWIW, the recently released beta of version 4.5 still does not display
the NCR page correctly.
-- John Wilcock, http://www.tradoc.fr/john/
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Irrational vs. rational thoughts
I ran across this and thought it was pretty good food for thought.
The 12 Irrational Beliefs (iB's) of REBT
1. The idea that it is a dire necessity for adults to be loved by significant others for almost everything they do--
Instead of their concentrating on their own self-respect, on winning approval for practical purposes, and on loving rather than on being loved.
2. The idea that certain acts are awful or wicked, and that people who perform such acts should be severely damned --
Instead of the idea that certain acts are self-defeating or antisocial, and that people who perform such acts are behaving stupidly, ignorantly, or neurotically, and would be better helped to change. People's poor behaviors do not make them rotten individuals.
3. The idea that it is horrible when things are not the way we like them to be--
Instead of the idea that it is too bad, that we would better try to change or control bad conditions so that they become more satisfactory, and, if that is not possible, we had better temporarily accept and gracefully lump their existence.
4. The idea that human misery is invariably externally caused and is forced on us by outside people and events
Instead of the idea that neurosis is largely caused by the view that we take of unfortunate conditions.
5. The idea that if something is or may be dangerous or fearsome we should be terribly upset and endlessly obsess about it--
Instead of the idea that one would better frankly face it and render it non-dangerous and, when that is not possible, accept the inevitable.
6. The idea that it is easier to avoid than to face life difficulties and self-responsibilities
Instead of the idea that the so-called easy way is usually much harder in the long run.
7. The idea that we absolutely need something other or stronger or greater than ourself on which to rely --
Instead of the idea that it is better to take the risks of thinking and acting less dependently.
8. The idea that we should be thoroughly competent, intelligent, and achieving in all possible respects --
Instead of the idea that we would better do rather than always need to do well, and accept ourself as a quite imperfect creature, who has general human limitations and specific fallibilities.
9. The idea that because something once strongly affected our life, it should indefinitely affect it --
Instead of the idea that we can learn from our past experiences but not be overly-attached to or prejudiced by them.
10. The idea that we must have certain and perfect control over things --
Instead of the idea that the world is full of improbability and chance and that we can still enjoy life despite this.
11. The idea that human happiness can be achieved by inertia and inaction --
Instead of the idea that we tend to be happiest when we are vitally absorbed in creative pursuits, or when we are devoting ourselves to people or projects outside ourselves.
12. The idea that we have virtually no control over our emotions and that we cannot help feeling disturbed about things --
Instead of the idea that we have real control over our destructive emotions if we choose to work at changing the musturbatory hypotheses which we often employ to create them.
REBT's 12 Rational Beliefs
Like replacing bad habits with good ones, your irrational thoughts must be replaced with more rational ones. For each of the 12 obvious irrational ideas listed here, what follows is a more reasonable way to look at the situation:
(Note: You may want to refer back to the 12 Irrational Beliefs in order for each of the below to make more sense.)
1. It is not possible for everyone to love and approve of us; indeed, we can not be assured that any one particular person will continue to like us. What one person likes another hates. When we try too hard to please everyone, we lose our identity, we are not self-directed, secure or interesting. It is better to cultivate our own values, social skills, and compatible friendships, rather than worry about pleasing everyone.
2. No one can be perfect. We all have weaknesses and faults. Perfectionism creates anxiety and guarantees failure. Perfectionistic needs may motivate us but they may take away the joy of living and alienate people if we demand they be perfect too. We (and others) can only expect us to do what we can (as of this time) and learn in the process.
3. No matter how evil an act, there are reasons for it. If we put ourselves in the other person's situation and mental condition, we would see it from his/her point of view and understand. Even if the person were emotionally disturbed, it would be "understandable" (i.e. "lawful" from a deterministic point of view). Being tolerant of past behavior does not mean we will refuse to help the person change who has done wrong.
Likewise, our own mean behavior should be understood by ourselves and others. When people feel mistreated, they can discuss the wrong done to them and decide how to make it right. That would be better than blaming each other and becoming madder and madder so both become losers.
4. The universe was not created for our pleasure. Children are commonly told, "You can't have everything you want." Many adults continue to have that "I want it all my way" attitude. The idea is silly, no matter who has it. There is nothing wrong, however, with saying, "I don't like the way that situation worked out. I'm going to do something to change it." If changes aren't possible, accept it and forget it. An ancient idea is to accept whatever is.
5. As ancient philosopher Epictetus said, it is not external events but our views, our self-talk, our beliefs about those events that upset us. So, challenge your irrational ideas. You may be able to change external events in the future and you certainly can change your thinking. Remember no one can make you feel anyway; you are responsible for your own feelings.
6. There is a great difference between dreadful ruminations about what awful things might happen and thinking how to prevent, minimize, or cope with real potential problems. The former is useless, depressing, exhausting, and may even be self-fulfilling. The latter is wise and reassuring. Keep in mind that many of our fears never come true. Desirable outcomes are due to the laws of behavior, not due to our useless "worry." Unwanted outcomes are also lawful, and not because we didn't "worry."
7. As with procrastination, avoidance of unpleasant tasks, and denial of problems or responsibilities frequently yields immediate relief but, later on, results in serious problems. The lifestyle that makes us most proud is not having an easy life but facing and solving tough problems.
8. People are dependent on others, e.g. for food, work, etc., but no one needs to be dependent on one specific person. In fact, it is foolish to become so dependent that the loss of one special person would leave you helpless and devastated.
9. You can't change the past but you can learn from it and change yourself (and maybe even the circumstances). You can teach an old dog new tricks. Self-help is for everyone every moment.
10. It is niceto be concerned, sympathetic, and helpful. It is not helpful and may be harmful to become overly distraught and highly worried about other people's problems. They are responsible, if they are able adults, for their feelings, for their wrong-doing, and for finding their own solutions.
Often there is little you can do but be empathic. Avoid insisting on rescuing people who haven't asked you for help.
11. A helpless, hopeless "I-can't-change" attitude is not in keeping with modern-day self-help and therapeutic methods. There are many ways to change unwanted feelings. On the other hand, there is merit in "being able to flow with your feelings" in certain circumstances.
Being unable to feel or express certain emotions is a serious handicap but correctable. Being dominated by one's emotions--a slave to your emotions--is also a serious but correctable problem. As long as our emotions are sometimes destructive and irrational, it is crazy to unthinkingly "follow our feelings."
12. Perfection is NOT the goal. There is no one perfect solution but there may be several good alternatives. Try one, see what happens (observe the laws at work), and try again if your first idea doesn't work. Perfectionism causes problems, including taking too much time, becoming too complicated, causing undue anxiety, and lowering our self-esteem.
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Re: Irrational vs. rational thoughts
6. There is a great difference between dreadful ruminations about what awful things might happen and thinking how to prevent, minimize, or cope with real potential problems. The former is useless, depressing, exhausting, and may even be self-fulfilling. The latter is wise and reassuring. Keep in mind that many of our fears never come true. Desirable outcomes are due to the laws of behavior, not due to our useless "worry." Unwanted outcomes are also lawful, and not because we didn't "worry."
This is my achilles heel. Rumination. I'm getting better about it, but I am a worrier at times. I can catastrophize with the best of them. My sister is having her bone marrow transplant this evening. I could easily ruminate over all the things that might go wrong for her over the next few weeks. But there's not a darned thing I can do about it except pray.
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Re: Irrational vs. rational thoughts
Wow! what a helpful list.
thank you for sharing..... I've only just read to #3 .... concentration is a bit off today.....
but I will mark this and refer back to it.
thank you
What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us.
― Ralph Waldo Emerson
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Re: Irrational vs. rational thoughts
I'm glad you're getting better at it. Whenever I catch myself getting anxious I switch to thinking of at least one thing I can do to make myself feel better. Sometimes it's funny, like when I was awake in the middle of the night and worried about the dust on the door lintel and how I was going to be 90 years old and alone and unable to clean and be buried alive under my dirty stuff, etc. :-) The next day I deliberately cleaned the lintel!
"The master of the garden is the one who waters it, trims the branches, plants the seeds, and pulls the weeds. If you merely stroll through the garden, you are but an acolyte." ~Vera Nazarian
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Re: Irrational vs. rational thoughts
Great read!
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Re: Irrational vs. rational thoughts
thank you for sharing
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Re: Irrational vs. rational thoughts
Thanks, FG!
And thanks to you, too, Perna, going to clean now....
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Re: Irrational vs. rational thoughts
Thanks, very helpful!
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Father: Joseph Andrew Jackson WOOD b: 9 SEP 1837 in Paulding County,Georgia
Mother: Martha Ann WRIGHT b: 24 FEB 1845 in Georgia
Marriage 1 Alice C. WOOD? b: 16 SEP 1869 in Georgia
Marriage 2 Leola WOOD? b: 1883 in Georgia
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Manual trans swap help
I have a 02 325i (AUTO).. need to do a manual swap to get this car going sideways. A person I know says that he has a trans but its a 95 325i 5 speed, will it work? If not can someone give me a complete list of usable trans. I am on a budget since I am starting to pay $14000 in student loans this december, so cant upright buy a complete swap for $1000-1200. PLEASE HELP
I HAVE EVERYTHING NOW FOR THE SWAP EXCEPT need to resurface the flywheel, new clutch, pads for the clutch assembly, and new bearings and bushings where there needed.
BTW I have 2 trans and 2 drivesahfts, I got the second from a 323i partout and wanted everything from 1 car instead of using the parts from the person I got from on here since I dont know if they came off 1 car or he collected them piece by piece.
Um... Get your flamesuit on OP
I'm not even sure where to start with telling you what a bad series of ideas you're about to embark upon.
1. How's your cooling system?
2. How's your suspension?
3. How's your subframe?
4. How's the rest of your maintenance?
5. If a grand is more than you can afford to spend on a transmission swap from auto to manual right now because of upcoming student loan repayments, you may want to swap cars fr something less maintenance intensive.
I dont have enough money to buy a cheap 240, so going manual to save money and have a better car than most
:facepalm: no e36 trans will not fit ! i have low mileage manual trans that i can sell you.
Get your priorities straight.
how much for the trans, also whats included. Lastley do you also have parts for the swap
sell car
buy honda
get a job
buy M3
located a 323i manual trans at a auto salvage location, only $400. So picking that up this week since they are only opened Monday-Friday. So will need the clutch assembly and random other parts
A manual transmission swap is pricey, it's not cheap. That's why they're telling you to forget it. You'll need the clutch master cylinder, flywheel, clutch, pilot bushing, clutch lines, pressure plate, clutch slave assembly, release bearing, manual trans mounts 'I'm not sure if you need better mounts since they'll take more abuse--and all the bolts that go with it. Seeing you have school to pay it may not be the best route, you'll be stressed. I'm not telling you, you can't do it, it's just not financially smart at your point in life. Heck, as well as for me. I take it you want to have fun, so why not do smaller mods? Work on the exhaust, intake, or whatever. The best mod you can do if they offer it is a accessport or tuner program...something of that sort. I'm not sure if anyone offers it for your car, but hey it's worth a shot.
Let me guess, this is your only car?
Terrible idea is terrible.
OP's degree? English.
This was on my shopping list a few days ago. Obviously you are not going with a 6 speed or an upgraded flywheel and clutch. But this should give you an idea of what to expect. Also, you might find some items for cheaper or more expensive.
6 speed tranny from a 330 ZHP(1300), 6 bolt driveshaft (200), 6 bolt 3.07differential (400), UUC Short shifter,New (325), UUC DSSR,New (150), steel clutch line, New (25), clutch slave and master cylinder (70) shifter assembly and linkage (50) clutch pedal assembly (45), UUC lightweight flywheel and clutch setup, New (1150), transmission mounts and brackets (25) I still need a few small things that I need to buy before I can do the swap
You will have to spend more on flywheel and clutch, master and slave cylinder, etc. than on the used transmission. Moreover, all of these should not be taken from a junk yard.
I wouldn't say a manual stransmission swap is a bad idea since your automatic may go south anytime. The whole 325i-drifting-on-a-budget thing is highly questionable though.
Pay your debt. Maintain your car. Do stupid things if you can afford them.
Take if from someone who has done this and gone through the trials and tribulations, it's not trivial.
Beyond that, given your apparent self-admitted, financial situation take the advice given.
As an aside you're only part way there with a manual. You still have an open diff. If this is you're daily driver welding the diff isn't an option and any of the available LSD's are beyond your financial means, currently.
I agree with everyone else, It's not gonna be cheap. But Is it gonna be worth it? Probably. Atleast to me it is, I'm not sure about you.
reason why i wanna drift instead of just time attack is because that got boring and with hard times the only thing keeping me up is my car, so not stopping the mods and if I do that will be when the car is totaled. so a 323 trans will bolt right up to my motor? and need a 323 drivshaft, or will I need a custom size?
The other problem here is that you've got a 325i. Not exactly the best drift car in the world. I wouldn't even think of it on the top 25. Or even top 50.
Also, what makes you think drifting is a cheap sport?
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text: Grove City College Associate Director of Education Career Services Deborah Snyder was installed as President-Elect of the American Association for Employment in Education (AAEE) for the 2013-14 year.Snyder will begin a three-year stint as president-elect, president and past-president, with each year including different responsibilities. Since 1934, the AAEE has provided members with direct access to research, publications and networking opportunities with colleagues—all focused upon the highest standards in educator preparation, recruitment and retention.The mission of the AAEE is to be the premier provider of information and resources to assist schools, colleges and universities in the employment of educators for staffing excellence in education. Their goal is to give members what they need to grow, learn, connect and serve.


text:
Aside from losing what little hair I have left over a project which developed a life of its own, broke out of the laboratory and terrified the local villagers, I've been listening to The Making of Modern Medicine, which was originally a series on BBC Radio 4 which follows the evolution of medicine from the time of Galen and the humours through to the mid-to-late twentieth century and high science.
For me, the biggest take home points for me were how we as modern medical students owe almost everything about the current teaching style to post-revolutionary France. "Little reading, much seeing and much doing" was the message from the teaching hospitals of Paris of the early 1800's - institutions which did not previously exist at a time when medicine was more about lectures and watching someone else dissect or perform examinations, rather than the student getting stuck in. The other resonant message was how medicine has moved from the times of Galen and Hippocrates when the patient would tell the doctor that they were unwell to the more modern, scientific world in which the doctor tells the patient when they are unwell - Indeed you cannot be unwell until a doctor says that you are unwell. I don't want to come off as reductionist about that point I can't help but feel that something has been lost there (as regards communication and relating to patients), something subtle but important.
Anyway, it's a great listen and very good value for money (6+ hours) - excellent gym fodder, when you want to take a break from the books and want something medical but light-hearted and engaging. And maybe someone else to read for you!
Amazon (UK) link: The Making of Modern Medicine
iTunes (UK) link: The Making of Modern Medicine


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Standby generators from Generac are equipped with the Nexus Controller, a state-of-the-art, digital controller that gives the generators a wide range of features. The controller handles a number of generator … Continue reading


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Lollipops and whiskey at Dougherty's
I was at Dougherty's the night that chef R.J. Van Stockum was adding Irish Leprechaun Lollipops to the menu. Lucky Leprechaun Lollipops. Irish Lollipops. The name had not yet been decided, but the prep had: a wad of Irish cheddar wrapped in prosciutto, cooked and stuck on the end of a breadstick. We demolished two plates of the perfect, pure guilty pleasure of melty cheese wrapped in ham. Nothing good for you about them, but definitely nothing bad, either. I waddled over to Van Stockum on the patio to talk about the lollipops and soon heard about the pea soup he'd been working on all day, laboring over, building up from the basic blocks.
"How many of you are there?" he asked. "Let me send you over some."
Dougherty's, which I review in this week's Westword, is a half-Irish pub/restaurant and total neighborhood bar -- a bar any neighborhood would be lucky to have. It's located at 5 East Ellsworth Avenue, about ten blocks away from the Fainting Goat, another half-Irish joint at 846 Broadway that I also write about this week.
Between visits to those two local polestars, I tried a different kind of neighborhood joint: Pho-Yo, a combination pho shop and frozen yogurt stand that just opened in Aurora, and is so much better than such a simple description makes it sound that you'll just have to read all about it to understand.
Which you can do tomorrow, right here at www.westword.com, or out on the street holding a newspaper in your sweaty little hands, just like god and R.W. "Johnny" Apple intended.
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David Hobbs helped make these videos
We are still working to obtain content for your car, however the video above is believed to have similar characteristics as your car.
This video shows you how to open the hood in your 2010 Dodge Avenger. Popping the hood on your Avenger is a two step process, you need to release the hood latch inside your Avenger and then you need to release the safety latch under your hood in the front of your Avenger. The video above shows you the location of both hood latches. Sometimes, the hood on Dodges gets stuck and won't pop up after the interior latch is released. If this occurs on your Avenger, simply pull up on the hood and it should pop up for you to release the second latch. Sometimes, especially on older Avengers, you may have difficulty getting your hood to latch when you close it. In this case, the interior release lever on your 2010 Dodge Avenger is probably stuck in the "open" position - push the release lever back and forth several times and then try to close your hood.
DRLs are on more than your headlights. They burn out faster and should be replaced regularly2010 Dodge Avenger SXT 2.4L 4 Cyl.
If your blinker doesn't blink, or blinks rapidly, you likely have a burnt out bulb2010 Dodge Avenger SXT 2.4L 4 Cyl.
Small bulbs that burn out regularly - did you know you can replace these with LED lights?2010 Dodge Avenger SXT 2.4L 4 Cyl.
Unlike a waist belt, these usually become looser as they age! Learn how to check it here2010 Dodge Avenger SXT 2.4L 4 Cyl.
On many cars, the high beam bulb runs at reduced power during the day - check 'em and change 'em!2010 Dodge Avenger SXT 2.4L 4 Cyl.
Avoid tickets and accidents with both working headlights! New bulbs are much brighter too2010 Dodge Avenger SXT 2.4L 4 Cyl.


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|BPR's FY 1919 annual report, which Chief Thomas MacDonald transmits to Secretary of Agriculture D. F. Houston today, notes that of 189 men employed by BPR at the start of World War I, 79 entered military service (plus one woman, clerk Edna Munger) and 3 died in action (Drainage Engineer Willis E. Comfort, Jr., Highway Engineer Percy A. Rideout, and stenographer Harris E. Petree). In addition, Auditor William Brown died of the nationwide flu epidemic, which struck immediately after the war. One BPR woman entered the naval service as a landsman.
|BPR Commissioner Ellis Armstrong attends the ribbon cutting ceremony for the AASHO Road Test at Ottawa, IL, one of his first official acts as Commissioner. "Today we are opening the most important section of highway in the country. For highways are built for only one reason--to serve the people. And this road is not different in that respect . . . . The benefits from this test road . . . will begin to serve the Nation at the earliest possible date." BPR Director Frank Turner and former Commissioner Charles Curtiss, now with ARBA, also participate.
|President Lyndon Johnson signs the Department of Transportation Act in the East Wing of the White House, authorizing creation of the USDOT, with FHWA as one of the modal Administrations.
"The Department of Transportation will have a mammoth task--to untangle, to coordinate, and to build the national transportation system for America that America is deserving of."
|Administrator Norbert Tiemann announces the establishment of an FHWA Division Office in Tehran, Iran, to be headed by Daniel Hammond and staffed with 11 FHWA employees. FHWA will be reimbursed for all costs incurred while providing technical assistance to Iran.
|President George Bush signs Public Law 101-427, renaming the National System of Interstate and Defense Highways: "The Dwight D. Eisenhower System of Interstate and Defense Highways."
|FHWA's Nondestructive Evaluation Validation Center debuts at the Turner-Fairbank Highway Research Center. The center is the only one in the world dedicated to evaluating and validating nondestructive technologies for highway and bridge inspection. Executive Director Anthony R. Kane joins Research and Development's Associate Administrator Bob Betsold and Glenn Washer in cutting the ceremonial ribbon.


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Hachette raises prices on Harry Bosch collections
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Hachette raises prices on Harry Bosch collections
The back list is an increasingly important revenue source in the age of ebooks because a) new readers can easily buy all the books in a series, and b) owners of paper books may buy again in ebook form.
A common way for publishers to mine the backlist back in the paper book era was to reprint omnibus editions, collecting several novels into one book. This gave readers a bargain price overall, and presumably was profitable for the publishers (otherwise why do it).
As an example, there are now three Harry Bosch collections each containing three novels. When only two were available, Hachette set the ebook price an $9.99 in the US and $11.29 CA (see
Three Harry Bosch Novels Shortcovers
). This was an good deal, and I bought both even though I had read all of them in paperback. The third is now available, but the price of all three collections has been raised to $17.99-$19.99 each. The third collection has a 1 star rating in the Kindle Store because of price.
This is still cheaper than buying the three ebooks separately, but is $19.99 the right price for three back list tiles in one ebook?
The Harry Bosch volumes clearly started out as paper books. However, it is very easy to combine ebooks into collections. Is this something that publishers should do more often?
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Drake Explains Frank Ocean's Absence From 2013 OVO Festival
Frank Ocean was slated to co-headline Drake's OVO Festival but pulled out days before the show forcing the cancelling of the first day of festivities. The show still went on with Miguel taking his spot, performances from James Blake and Wale, and the reunion of Diddy and Mase. Revolt TV recently caught up with the "All Me" rapper and got the skinny on why Ocean was a no-show. According to Drake, Ocean became too overwhelmed with his own performances and his recent vocal chord injury to make the Toronto festival. "I know Frank's been working hard touring everywhere so [his absence is] understandable," said Drake. "I've had my time where I was like, 'I can't do these shows.' It's just too much, you know. He hit me and was like, 'Yo, I'm sorry man.' It's all good, it's all love, man. It would have been incredible to have him."
No love lost. The show still had all kinds of surprises including performances from Kanye West, French Montana, TLC, A$AP Rocky and Lil Wayne. Check out the entire clip below.


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CAN you help: Volunteers are urgently needed to help at the village hall.
Events planned for the year include the barn dance, quiz night, summer barbecue, Last Night of the Proms and the beer festival.
If you'd like to be more involved, do go along to the next meeting of the Friends of the Village Hall.
They generally meet on the first Monday of every month, at 7.30pm in the Garden Room of the village hall. Contact Alan Ball on 01256 883838.
EVERGREENS: May says: "Our meeting on January 6 was our first for the year and we discussed our programme for 2014 and then had a few games of bingo. Our next meeting is on Monday, February 3, which will be the annual general meeting followed by a general knowledge quiz."
YOGA: Begins again at the village hall on Monday. Jacqui Morris is running an eight-week course on Mondays, from 7.15pm to 8.30pm. The sessions will be Hatha Yoga and will include relaxation and meditation.


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A vote of confidence in the Tory Party leader has been called, and he will now have to win a vote of the other Conservative MPs to stay in charge.
If more than 50% of them think he should stay in charge then Duncan Smith stays as leader, if not, a new leader will be chosen in a later vote.
The vote is happening because 25 Tory MPs have written to say they want one.
If Duncan Smith loses the vote of confidence, to be held on Wednesday, there would then be another vote to decide who would replace him.
It's quite a complicated system, but Duncan Smith couldn't stand in that fresh vote, so the Conservative Party would have a new leader.


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TootŌĆÖs customers enjoying ŌĆ£good food and funŌĆØ will be asked Tuesday to spread the enjoyment by donating to Special Olympians from Rutherford County competing in the state and national competitions.
ŌĆ£Wings and RingsŌĆØ will be from 5 p.m. to 8 p.m. at TootŌĆÖs restaurant on Northwest Broad Street.
Sheriff Robert Arnold said School Resource Officers will ask customers to be generous in supporting Rutherford CountyŌĆÖs developmentally challenged athletes who will advance to the state games May 16-17 in Nashville and the national Special Olympics in June in Princeton, N.J.
ŌĆ£Our SROs believe in helping the special needs students to compete in the local, state and national Special Olympics,ŌĆØ Sheriff Arnold said. ŌĆ£We hope customers will be generous to sponsor the athletes who will represent Rutherford County.ŌĆØ
Special Olympics Co-Chair Lou Paschall said the ŌĆ£Wings and RingsŌĆØ event pays expenses for 44 athletes and coaches to compete in the state games.
ŌĆ£Those athletes will compete in sports such as track and field events, aquatics, bocce and unified bocce, and powerlifting,ŌĆØ Paschall said.
Rutherford County will also be sending two athletes to the National Games in Princeton, N.J. ┬ĀCasey Martin and Marvin Robinson will attend the state summer games in order to prepare for the nationals. Although funds raised on Tuesday will be directed toward state and national competition, the funds will still exclusively benefit athletes from Rutherford County.
TootŌĆÖs General Manager Rachel Hunter said the local restaurant knows how important it is to give back to the community who has made the restaurant a success whether hosting an event or participating in an event.
ŌĆ£We love the ŌĆśWings and RingsŌĆÖ event because it has such an awesome energy surrounding it,ŌĆØ Hunter said.┬ĀŌĆ£The people who participate in┬ĀSpecial Olympics and the people who help behind the scenes are all amazing people and it's because of that we want to show our support for such a great cause.ŌĆØ
Paschall said she is grateful for the tremendous community support of Area 16 Special Olympics and the athletes.
ŌĆ£We are honored to have the ongoing opportunity to partner with Toot's and Sheriff Arnold and the Rutherford County Sheriff's Office,ŌĆØ Paschall said. ŌĆ£Please join us Tuesday night for some good food and fun and support a great cause.ŌĆØ