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Oh, for CRYING OUT LOUD!
Bowyer teaches biology in high school, and has for the past eleven or so years. He's a great teacher – I've seen him in action and it's obvious that he loves what he does. Lately, though, things haven't been so great for him, and that's what I'm ranting about.
Over the past several years, teachers I know have been complaining about the increasing lack of student involvement. Kids are getting harder and harder to engage, they say, and they're taking less and less personal responsibility for their own selves. Work – both quantity and quality – has been on a steady decline for the last five or six years – maybe longer, I'm told, and the administrations that my teacher friends work under have been less inclined to support teacher efforts to try to reverse this trend. Parents are more likely to blame the teachers for student failure than they are the students themselves. No Child Left Behind is just an abomination – the standards for achievement and improvement are not only unreasonable, but often patently irrational and everyone has been scrambling to "meet the standards" so that the money, such as it is, keeps coming.
Where does this leave the people actually DOING the work, the teachers and students? The learning – and working – environment has been consistently eroded in the name of "measurable progress."
Such has been the case for Bowyer. His curriculum is RIGHT in line with the state standards. He challenges his students; he varies the work he expects kids to do (papers, labs, projects, etc.), he regularly assesses their knowledge and skills. He's doing everything he's supposed to be doing, according to the rules set down by the school board and the Department of Education. Let me say this again – he's doing EVERYTHING HE'S SUPPOSED TO BE DOING. So what's the problem?
His kids are failing. Not all of them, mind you, and not as many as were failing this time last year, but far more are failing than his administration would like to see (though how many failures are "acceptable" no one has quite articulated). As a result, he's been "written up," which, if I'm understanding this correctly, means that the process of official sanction has begun. Bowyer will get a mentor who will come into his classroom on regular observation visits; he'll have to submit more documentation about exactly what he's covering in his classes, what he expects the students to do and how he assesses that work; he'll have to attend meetings where he talks about such things. He will be closely monitored and "guided" in the hopes that his failure rate will drop. This makes everyone but Bowyer feel better: the administration looks good because they're taking action with what they see as an ineffective teacher, the students and the parents are happy because they have someone else to blame for the students' lack of progress, and the school looks good because it's being proactive in the face of NCLB – they'll have documentation!!
Here's the thing, though; no one in authority – and I mean NO ONE – has mentioned a damned word about the STUDENTS' responsibility in Bowyer's failure rate. Several of his students are failing not because they can't understand the material or for some lack of teaching skill on Bowyer's part, but because they don't bother showing up for class. Or school, for that matter. Some kids are failing because they don't do the work – they show up and participate in class discussions and they may even pass the tests, but they don't do the homework or hand in completed labs – they're just not doing a significant amount of the work – work that constitutes a large portion of their final grades.
Neither of these factors is Bowyer's responsibility and there's really very little that he can – or should – do to affect any change about them. We're not talking about fourth-graders, here; we're talking about high school-aged kids – fourteen to eighteen year olds who, by this point, should at least have an inkling about the concepts of personal responsibility and consequences. Bowyer is more than willing to work with the kids who are struggling but he's not willing (and nor should he be, in my opinion) to chase down or hassle the kids who've decided they're not going to participate in their own education. He shouldn't have to deal with parents who come to him angry that "he's failing my kid" (which I love, in a bitter and ironic sort of way. Teachers don't GIVE grades, kids EARN them. Teachers don't fail kids; kids fail themselves – but that's another post). My point is that, in high school, we should be spending a significant amount of our time and effort preparing kids to make their way in the world. Bowyer's trying to do that and teach biology at the same time and now he's getting crap for that. I've gotta tell ya, this ain't how to do it.
Look. It's all very simple. Here is the work we're doing in this class. You find out, in the first week of school, what this is going to be about. I give you a basic idea of what I'm going to expect – what we're going to read, how often we're going to write or test, how much this or that will be weighted in your final grade. You find out what you can expect from me and what I will and won't do to see that you succeed. From there on out, it's in your hands. It's YOUR job to do the work – I'm not going to chase you down or remind you about due dates. You can do the work or not – that's your decision – but understand that a failure to even attempt to do the work will result in your failing the course, and you forfeit your right to complain about that TWO WEEKS BEFORE SCHOOL ENDS. If you're struggling, you need to come to me and tell me so and I will do everything – and I mean everything – in my power to get you upright again. If you can't finish a paper by the due date, you need to come to me (and NOT the day before the thing is due, by the way) to let me know what the problem is and I assure you that, 99% of the time, we'll adjust the date so you can do the work sufficiently. Get the big picture here? Whose responsibility is it? MY job is to present this material to you in a logical, ordered, varied and intersting way. MY job is to help you understand this material and teach you how to take it out into the world with you and make good use of it. YOUR job is to TAKE SOME RESPONSIBILITY for yourself and your learning. Show up to class. BRING A PENCIL, for crying out loud! Listen to me and to others and to yourself. Talk, think, take chances. DO THE WORK. And, perhaps most importantly, don't blame me or anyone else when you choose not to talk or think or take chances or do the work. You have a responsibility to yourself, and it's not my job, or your parents' job, or the administration's job to see to it that you carry that responsibility out.
I'm angered that Bowyer's been put in this situation. It's political and stupid and an utter waste of time and energy on everyone's part. It makes me frightened to accept a job in education (and no, I haven't heard anything back from LHS yet – I'll tell you as soon as I do). I have no patience for this crap.


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The marriage of real-estate scions Ivanka Trump and Jared Kushner had people speculating about the cost of her Vera Wang gown, seating arrangements at the power-packed reception—and the length of the prenuptial agreement.
A 'prenup' is a legal contract, signed prior to a marriage or civil union, that outlines provisions for spousal support and the division of assets in the event of divorce or separation. A postnuptial agreement is basically the same, but occurs during a marriage.
Many balk at the idea of a pre- or postmarital agreement. "Obviously, some people think it's not in the proper spirit of share-and-share-alike," says Sam Hais of Hais, Hais, Goldberger & Coyne. But not so obvious are the reasons that make these agreements advisable. "Robert Frost had the right idea when he wrote, 'Good fences make good neighbors,'" Hais says. "A pre- or postnup, properly and lawfully done, can solve problems and settle issues once and for all and remove them from the arena of marital argument."
Hais notes that a thorough, detailed pre- or postnuptial agreement is less vulnerable to challenge in the event of divorce. "Be careful to dot the t's and cross the i's, right down to deciding who pays the property tax on divvied-up properties," he says. "If you intend to keep certain aspects of your assets or property separate, make those arrangements from the very beginning."
Many people don't realize that interest and dividends from separate property can be considered marital property unless specifically addressed in a prenuptial agreement, Hais says. "So consult a qualified legal professional, keep separate bank accounts for interest and dividends, and maintain careful records throughout the marriage. And whatever you do, don't spring a prenup on your intended the night before the wedding with the words, 'sign this or the wedding's off.'" Besides being bad form, "that's considered coercion and can invalidate the agreement," Hais says.
The same legal conditions apply to pre- and postnups, notes attorney Susan Roach of The Roach Law Firm: full disclosure of each party's assets and separate counsel for each party. "A prenup makes sense whenever you have assets to protect, even if you're not as wealthy as a Trump," Roach says. "Postnups are usually used to settle financial changes that occur after the marriage—for example, removing a business from the table in the event of a divorce. The arrangements are more common than they used to be, especially in second or third marriages where one or both parties have children from other relationships or have accumulated significant wealth prior to or during the marriage."
Despite precautions, "prenups aren't as sacred as they used to be," Roach says. "A change in case law a few years ago meant that, in the event of the relationship's dissolution, the court can examine the prenup and determine if it's conscionable, or fair. This makes sense in cases where the financial circumstances of one or both parties have changed dramatically during the marriage, creating an inequity."
Margo Green of Green, Cordonnier & House supports prenuptial agreements, particularly if one partner goes into a marriage making a lot more than the other or stands to inherit a great deal of money. "However, even an ironclad prenup can be challenged under certain circumstances," she cautions. "Say that a wife waives maintenance when she signs the agreement. Ten years later, she gets hit by a bus and is completely paralyzed. Her husband wants to divorce her and stick to the original agreement. In that case, a judge will often set the agreement aside and make a more equitable arrangement."
Green doesn't see many postnuptial agreements in her Clayton practice. "I get maybe one or two a year," she says. "They don't usually hold up in court; judges don't like them," she says. "OK, so conditions change during your marriage and you start making a lot more money. Does that mean you don't want to share it with your spouse? It hardly seems fair."
Prenups and postnups aren't the only way to handle substantial assets, notes Don Singer of The Singer Law Firm. "Parents who want to leave a great deal of money to their children and make sure they hang onto it after a divorce should set aside that money in a protective or spendthrift trust, long before their children are ready to marry," he says. "Estate planners and asset protection managers can deal with the situation in ways that aren't as blunt as a prenup or postnup."
Singer, who focuses on estate planning and wealth and asset protection, recalls an incident in which a young woman actually broke off the engagement when her fiance asked her to sign a prenup. "There was a lot of bitterness and ugliness that could have been avoided," he says. "Consult competent legal counsel and protect your assets long before your kids start dating. That way, you can always blame it on the lawyer!"


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December's Book Club pick is You Can Make Him Like You by Ben Tanzer
I think it was recommended to me (us?) by Brandon Tietz.
I started reading it last week (I think) and I'm loving it. It's funny, honest, and fast paced. If you liked Syrup or Company by Max Barry - you'll like this. And if you didn't like those, you'll still like this - I promise.
Here's the description:
You Can Make Him Like You, Tanzer's third novel is an adventure in being a grown up, in facing relationships and jobs, friendships and parenthood. A true exploration of what it means to live in our world, saturated with pop culture in the midst of real life struggles.
Here's a youtube video/interview about the book. I'm guessing Myles is his son? I'm sure he can correct me on that, because he should be stopping in to say "hi" to all of us.
Here's his blog: This Blog Will Change Your Life
I think that's it for now.
Get to reading.


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Who Does The Work In Your House?
My boyfriend and I moved in together about three months ago, and all is going well. We have what I think is a pretty nice division of labor. He does all the cooking and food shopping, and I do the cleaning, no big deal. Since we've started dating/cohabitating, my general understanding of how to cook has gone down by, like, a zillion points. These days I have a really hard time feeding myself if my boyfriend hasn't made something (thank you Seamless).
But you know what? I feel like our labor isn't equal. I feel like my boyfriend does all the work. And that's because his work results in an end product — dinner. While mine is a little bit more abstract. As in: Oh yes, we don't live in filth and the dishes are generally cleaned once a day. We both do the parts of our household chores that we enjoy — I mean, I'm an anal retentive Virgo who actually likes cleaning, go figure.
I think I've been super brainwashed into thinking that food = love. In my family, special occasions are marked with delicious, slaved-over meals and perfectly baked desserts. And the fact that my dude does all the cooking, and that I'm seemingly illiterate in the kitchen, makes me feel like I lack some basic way of expressing my love and appreciation for him. I think I'm totally used to the trope where a woman shows that she loves her man by making him a home-cooked meal. But since that's what he does, I'm feeling a bit at a loss.
Anybody else out there have the same complex?


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I suppose you can if you were dumb and delusional enough to think that the Emmy voters might liven things up a little bit.
Will Oprah liven up C-SPAN's usually drab red-carpet pre-show?
Sachin Tendulkar may be one of the most brilliant players in the sport, but he struggles to liven up his memoirs.
He also used his acting and directorial skills to liven up dreary hearings.
The newly appointed CNN boss says the network must liven up its daily fare.
Gradually, over yonder on the cruiser, things begin to liven up.
But what are you stopping the air for when it's rushing in to liven us up?
"We shall look to you to liven things up," he said, poor man!
Especially when our country neighbors come in to ''liven us up.'
There is nothing in the world better calculated to dissipate worry and liven things up than a genuine camp-fire.