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I'm so sorry for the ridiculously long delay on this chapter; I've been so, so busy but I've finally had the chance to write it. Parts aren't as I envisioned (eg the penultimate scene) but I hope you enjoy!
Myrnin regrets his actions the next morning as he wakes up in his laboratory covered in blood, the remnants of his meal of the night before still lying on the floor; he immediately begins to clear up, fearing that Claire will be in the building within a few more minutes, until he remembers.
The broom in his hand drops to the floor with a clatter as he recalls what happened yesterday, what happened to cause him to give up his lack of hunting: he kissed Claire, she kissed him back, and then she left—forever. She told him that she's never going back, and he doesn't think that he can cope with this.
It seems quiet—too quiet for Myrnin's sensitive ears; Claire's been a constant noise during her time here, because those short hours she has departed his laboratory, he's been able to imagine her heartbeat, to recreate her standing behind the fire in his mind. Now, the heartbeat's gone forever (because he's not going to go into the town during the day, and she won't come here at night as there's no reason for someone in her position to do so) and it's only going to make him crave the hunt even more.
These past months, he's managed to go without blood for as long as his body has been able to cope, not wanting to take so much from the humans because of Claire, and even then, it's been sparing amounts of blood from each person, never enough for them to notice. They've never been harmed (permanently, at least), and if he thinks that they may have even a slight indication that something's happened to them, he uses his 'power' in order to wipe their memories. The short visits Amelie has made upon Saturday evenings, remaining until the Sunday, every week since Claire's arrival have reminded him that this isn't the way he's used to acting—she's been surprised every visit to realise that Claire is still alive, though Myrnin knows that Amelie does her best to hide that shock—and yet he's reverted back to his old way of life seamlessly.
But not quite—even now, he's wracked with guilt about what he did last night, about how he betrayed Claire's trust because she's trusted him with her life, and there's nothing more she could trust him with. And yet he's a vampire, someone who ought never to be trusted with something so precious, particularly the life of someone as vibrant and brilliant as Claire…yet she's given him it for so long. And all he's done is sacrifice the trust she's unwittingly put in him; he doesn't know if he's ever going to regain it.
Sighing, Myrnin bends over to pick up the corpse from the floor, moving it into his old storage location for such things; he'll remove it tonight in the dead of night, when every single person in the town is asleep.
All he can hope is that Amelie will come soon, in order to alleviate the growing weight of loneliness that's already pressing upon his shoulders…
"Aren't you hungry?"
Shane's voice jerks Claire from her reverie, and she looks up from her plate to see Shane staring at her. It's only now that she realises she's been staring at her food for an immeasurable period of time, long enough for Shane to realise her attention is elsewhere.
"I…no," she says quietly, and as her eyes meet Shane's, she sees a glimmer of delight shoot through his. It takes a while for her to understand why; every woman in his family has lost their appetite when pregnant. It's something he told her last week, when she first started to give up on eating, and it's haunted her ever since because whilst he's getting more and more excited about a baby that doesn't exist (how could she let herself get pregnant in this sort of situation?) she's unable to rid herself of a man she left behind.
She hasn't visited Myrnin in eight days now, and every single second has broken her apart a little bit more than before. Every time she looks at the clock and thinks, I should be in the lab at the minute, her heart feels as though it's a little closer to beating its last beat. All she wants is to be with Myrnin, to bury her head in science and never leave his side again…but she can't. She chose Shane over him, chose her marriage and what's right over what she wants, because that's what she's been raised to do: please others and ensure that she acts respectably at all times. That's her purpose—that, and to produce a male heir.
Shane looks at her again and reaches across the table to take her hand. His eyes are kind, gentle, and each second that their eyes are locked together makes Claire want to run away from him even more—but she can't. Of course she can't. "Everything will be fine," he promises her, but each word feels as though he's stabbing her in the chest. "If you would like, I can summon the doctor from the town to see if you are well?" he asks, and as he speaks, Claire can hear the perking up of his voice, and just how much he wants this.
"If you feel that it's advisable, then yes," she agrees, barely restraining herself from sighing; she doesn't want this, not at all. "For the current time, I think I'll go for a walk in the garden. I'll see you at lunch."
With this, Claire walks out of the room, setting her napkin down on one of the tables as she does so, Shane saying nothing as she departs. She heads down the ridiculously long corridor to reach the main door, which is opened for her by one of the servants, before taking steps onto the slightly damp lawn. It sprawls out for acres around her, and for a few moments, Claire lifts her head to the sky and breathes in deeply. What she first thinks is dampness from the wind turns out to be tears, she soon discovers as she lifts her hand to her face; she's crying because she has no idea what she's doing and why she's still here when all she wants is to go to Myrnin and be with him.
At least, that's what she thinks she wants.
Whether she really does or not, she decides, can only be ascertained by staying away from him for a longer period of time, no matter how much it hurts.
"Old friend, why are you so upset?"
This question alerts Myrnin to his friend's arrival, and he turns to look at her with a sheepish expression. Every piece of glassware in his laboratory has been smashed beyond recognition, the majority of it fine dust upon the floor, and for a moment he forgets why.
"Amelie, you have returned to me!" he almost sings out, moving swiftly across the room to stand before the woman entering his home. "I have missed you so very greatly, I cannot begin to put into words how much I require your presence at the current moment—"
She cuts him off. "I know there are seven dead, and they have all died within the past eight days, Myrnin," Amelie says sharply, and Myrnin's sheepish gaze suddenly becomes more so. "This place has been a safe respite for you for a short while; why have you suddenly decided to threaten your cover and risk exposure? It makes no sense; you haven't killed—save for the one child—in years…why now?"
Myrnin sinks slowly to his knees, and reaches for Amelie's hand, which she gives him willingly. "I…I couldn't resist. The pain…it…I cannot function already, Amelie, and it has only been weeks since—" he cuts himself off as quickly as possible, but he knows that Amelie's razor sharp mind will have already connected the pieces of information and the unfamiliar scent to conclude…
"You have fallen in love." Amelie says it slowly, without anger or insult in her tone; she merely states it. "And not only with anyone, but with a human…one who has left you. Why did she leave you? Did she discover what you are; is our secret compromised?"
He shakes his head vigorously, lifting his head to look at Amelie, his eyes filling with tears. "No, no, she has no idea about what a…monster I am," he whispers. "She…she is married."
There's no need for him to say any more; Amelie's expression softens even further, and she uses her hand to pull Myrnin to his feet, resting her other hand on his shoulder in a act of condolence. "I am truly sorry, Myrnin," she murmurs. "It perhaps was not to be…why did you become involved with her anyway, if she is married? I have never known you to do such a thing before."
Myrnin makes an effort to wipe his eyes as he looks at Amelie, before responding. "I…we were not romantically involved…not until the very end, when we shared a kiss—and she left immediately afterwards," he tells Amelie, who nods in what he presumes to be an understanding manner. "I was teaching her science; she is one of the brightest people I have ever met, including myself though I hope you will pardon my boasting, and she wanted to learn more. Her husband has basically forbidden her to do such a thing…so I merely wanted to fulfil her wishes. I didn't mean to fall for her, I truly didn't…it was a mistake."
Amelie smiles ever so slightly, a smile laced with melancholy and regret. "It never happens how you desire it to, does it?" she says, her eyes filling with sadness. "It's never the intention to fall in love, particularly when the person has so many issues that love between you and them can never be feasible. But you must move on, Myrnin, and in a way which doesn't draw attention to…to what you are." Her voice becomes firmer now as she discusses their safety; this region is somewhere she has particularly liked for decades, but if they were known as what they are—vampires—then she would never be able to return. Folklore passed down through families in this neighbourhood is believed, and her face would be tied in with the story forever more.
He nods, reaching for Amelie's hand once more. "I…I understand. I cannot—I refuse to—leave without closure, however. I will remain here until something significant occurs in her life which could change anything ever happening, and when it happens, I shall return with you to London—or wherever you decide to move to. I will not leave your side again, not until we settle somewhere for the rest of eternity." Myrnin's promise is truthful, though he knows that there is a stubborn undertone that Amelie will be able to hear; he refuses to leave until he knows that Claire will never come to him again. In this situation, that proof would be a child, something which would rip his heart to pieces—but if it happens, it happens. And he will leave.
Amelie stares at Myrnin for a few, immeasurable moments, before slowly nodding her head. "I agree with this logic. There is always a chance that she may change her mind, and I do not want you to hurt forever because you don't know if she does or not. But you must be careful, Myrnin, you must be." Her voice is urgent, worried almost, and Myrnin smiles a wry smile.
"I always am careful, my dear," he replies, noting the sudden change in his friend's expression. "Well, I am when I want to be. Now come, sit, you have had a long journey and I suppose you shall be returning tomorrow night."
Shane's out, the maids are in the other rooms cleaning and, for the first time in twenty hours, Claire is completely alone. The first thing she does is check that she is alone—the servants here are too quiet, too scared to speak in her presence, so she never knows if they're lingering or not without looking—before slipping into her bedroom and removing a book from the bookcase. It's hollowed out inside, with many of her science notes stored inside of it, and Claire merely stares at the top piece of paper for almost a minute, the anticipation far too great for her to deal with. She's missed this, missed being able to read her notes about experiments he made her do and what the conclusions she drew from them are. All she yearns for is to go back, to learn about science forever—or as long as forever can be for someone with a limited life span—and to see him, the man she could see herself growing old and grey with.
For almost thirty minutes, Claire reads through the pages of scrawled notes she made in his laboratory—she cannot use his name, even in her mind, for to do that would be to allow the wall she's built around it to come tumbling down—until she decides that it's now too risky to continue to do it. So she slips the book back onto the shelf, a little happier now that she's revised everything she still can remember with crystal clear clarity, because it's science…and this science is better than none at all, isn't it?
(She thinks so anyway.)
(It doesn't stop her still wanting him, though.)
Amelie leaves the following evening, returning to her home in London and the man she currently feels slightly attracted to—how, Myrnin has never asked, though he partially would like to know now. He wants to know whether his love for Claire is fleeting, like Amelie's love for every man in her life has been, or whether it's a lasting love, one that will continue long into the lifespan of probably Claire's great-great grandchildren.
"Amelie," Myrnin begins cautiously as he fastens the clasp around her neck to secure her cloak to her body.
"Yes?" she questions, her eyes narrowing as she attempts to read his face. "What do you want to know about me now, my friend?"
"How deeply do you feel attracted to this John fellow?" he asks, coming out with it straight away; with matters of the heart, he has never been good at making his words flowery and disguising his point behind metaphors and fancy literary devices.
Amelie smiles slightly, lifting her hand to touch Myrnin's cheek softly before moving one of the curls lining his face so that she can see into both of his eyes. "I…not very much," she admits, and Myrnin feels a crushing pain that he doesn't quite understand. "However, I can see in your face that you love this girl very much, and that is the sort of love I want to find. I want someone to love like you love this girl, and so I shall continue with my flings and dalliances with knights, and you shall…you shall be fine, Myrnin, for whatever happens is fate. It is destined to happen, and I shall be very surprised if she does not turn up at your door within weeks, begging you to understand why she acted the way she did."
Myrnin regrets Amelie making this promise the moment the words leave her lips, because it fills him with hope—hope that he knows is futile, almost certainly never going to be fulfilled. Yet it lifts him for the moment, and somehow he manages to plaster a smile upon his lips as he moves in to press a kiss to Amelie's cheek.
"You are right, I hope," he comments, squeezing Amelie's other hand. "I do hope that you enjoy yourself until our next meeting, Amelie. I shall miss you greatly, as I always do; when this lifespan is over, I feel that we ought to take a holiday somewhere exotic, perhaps find a spring where we can swim once more."
"I would very much like that," Amelie replies, removing herself from Myrnin's grasp. "But to return to London before sunrise, I must depart now. Be careful, Myrnin; I do not want you to lose yourself and all control you possess."
Before he can say another word, she's gone, flitting from the laboratory through the now open door into the night as silently as she arrived, mere days ago. As soon as she's gone, Myrnin feels the hope she filled him with falter, as though only Amelie's presence kept him whole…and he knows that before the morrow is out, he will have hunted.
He will have killed—again.
Because, in Myrnin's eyes, hope is something that only aims to destroy, not to build confidence; it can never be a good thing to have more than an ounce of hope.
Otherwise, you can be destroyed.
It takes another week before Claire crumbles.
Every day, she's read her notes, analysing everything until there is nothing left to analyse but the components of the paper she used to write her notes, and even that doesn't take too long to work out. She's bored, restless, and takes to walking around the garden, reciting lines of the periodic table in the hope that repetition will aid her in learning things to the point that they roll off her tongue without any prompting whatsoever.
Shane thinks that this is a good sign that she's pregnant, something he's even come out and directly said, and the doctor who visited seems to think that she's pregnant, too. Claire knows that she isn't, though; she's keeping quiet about what she knows has happened and definitely proves her lack of pregnancy, because it keeps Shane happy whilst she figures out what she wants from her life…and who she wants it with.
As she walks through the grass and trees, Claire's heart feels as though it's about to break into pieces as she makes her decision; does she go with him for love, for science, for everything she's ever wanted…or, for propriety's sake, for doing what's right for her and her family, does she stay with Shane, as she has done for weeks now? She made the decision to come back here for some reason; there must be something that draws her back here…but no. Claire thinks more and more about it, and she realises just how much she considers this home to be a prison; it's lavishly furnished, she's treated like a princess and she has everything she wants (besides science, of course) but it's still a prison. Now that she's 'pregnant', Shane doesn't seem to want her going out anywhere without him, and even then, the only place she seems to be able to get to without a fuss is church—and she doesn't even particularly believe in the ideologies of the church.
All she seems to feel nowadays is depressed; whereas before she would leap for joy and bound around with insatiable energy, nowadays she can barely gather the strength to move from one side of the room to the other. She doesn't want to do anything, doesn't want to go anywhere or interact with anyone other than the one man she has questions for. Even rereading the notes she made weeks ago cause her to think things through in a new way and consider theories in a slightly different manner, leaving her with questions which nobody can answer…nobody but a man who she cannot see. It's this knowledge that depresses her the most: the knowledge that she can have all the questions in the world, and yet never get them answered…because she has chosen to be loyal to Shane above everything.
But now…now she can't take it any more.
It's not just the questions; it's the aching yearn her heart has to see Myrnin again that has Claire waking up from the stupor this house has had her in. It's this desire to see him that has her walking swiftly from the far side of the orchard back to the house to change into appropriate gear to walk to the village in, as well as to inform Shane where she's going—to visit the old woman, to ensure that she is still relatively happy following her apparent 'acceptance' of her child's death—and within less than ten minutes, Claire's on her way to Myrnin. She's missed him more than she can put into words, and those final moments with Shane—he gave her a pound and told her to be careful—she knows will, hopefully, be the last she ever shares with him. It's a cruel, evil thing to do, to leave him without even telling him where she's going and why, but it's all she can do; it was a spur of the moment decision, the physical need to see Myrnin taking precedence over telling Shane that she loves someone more than him, and therefore her actions need to be equally spontaneous.
As Claire near sprints down the road towards the town, she recites possible ways to tell Myrnin how she feels in her mind, each one less appropriate and cheesier than the last.
Little does she know what she's going to find when she arrives in the laboratory.
As Claire approaches the street down which the laboratory lies, she falters in her progress; does she really want to do this? Her confidence breaks into pieces as she nears the end of the street, her feet clattering upon the cobbles, and for a moment, she considers running away. He doesn't know that she's here, doesn't know that she's merely twenty metres from his door; she could escape, run back to a boring but safe life with Shane without Myrnin ever knowing how she really feels. She couldn't tell him how she feels and then leave him again; that would be too mean. As of now, however, he doesn't know…so she could leave and just break her own heart in the process.
Her feet are moving her towards the door already, though, and as she nears the laboratory enough that she can see the cracks in the wooden door, she knows that it's too late. There's no way that she's going back.
Slowly, Claire pushes the door to, knowing that there's no point in knocking as Myrnin never answers the door. She's the only person who enters anyway, she thinks…or so she thought anyway…
There's a woman's cloak on the side as she peeks in.
It takes a moment or two for Claire, still standing in the doorway to the laboratory, to allow her eyes to acclimatise to the darkness inside the building…but once she does, she regrets allowing herself to do it.
Her feet move her forwards of their own accord, down the steps and into the room with the huge, now apparently cracked wooden table in the middle, but her eyes are focused on the man to the right hand side of the table, with a woman in his arms…
…and his mouth at her throat.
"Myrnin?" Claire gasps quietly, not sure what she's seeing—one thing she knows for sure though, is that he doesn't care about her enough if he's moving on with another woman so soon after she left him—but she wants to know what it is. "What are you…oh my god!" she shrieks out, unable to help herself as Myrnin's head lifts and turns to face her.
Rather than his usual brown eyes, the irises are crimson red, but more pressing than that are the fangs protruding from his upper gums, dripping with blood. The blood, Claire presumes, is from the woman's throat, and all Claire can do is stagger backwards until she's leaning against the wooden table.
She doesn't understand; how can Myrnin, the lovely, kind-hearted, gentle man she's known for weeks, be this…this monster? How can he be a mythical creature she didn't believe existed, someone who snatches lives from others in order to be able to live forever, be the man who's taught her so much and expected nothing in return? He wouldn't hurt her—he would have done that already, if he was going to—so how can this be the same man?
"Claire," Myrnin says very slowly, turning his head back to face her; only then does she realise that she lost sight of his fangs, though the image is burnt into her mind for the rest of her life. "Claire, I'm not going to hurt you." He takes a step towards her, the woman in his arms, but Claire shuffles around the table so that it's between her and him, her stomach pressing into the side of it.
"You're a vampire," she whispers, barely able to get the words out. Myrnin merely nods in confirmation. "Oh my god, I can't believe…oh god, what, how?" she cries out, more to herself than to Myrnin, though he takes it upon himself to give her a sort of answer.
"It's a long story," he begins, stopping in his tracks as he realises that Claire doesn't want to go near him. "Claire…I'm sorry. I didn't want you to know…" he trails off as Claire laughs a cold, harsh laugh.
"I came here to tell you that I love you and that I want to be with you; how could you avoid it then?" she snaps, anger coursing through her veins, overriding the fear that threatens to turn her body to ice. "You…oh god…" she trails off this time, her face turning ice cold as she understands something. "It was you who killed the child. It was you, just like you're killing that woman there. You drank…oh god…you drank their blood and then you dumped the body for their mother to find. You killed an innocent child!"
He doesn't deny it, and that's what destroys Claire completely. He doesn't deny that he hurt the child who has been her cover to come visit Myrnin for all these weeks, and it makes her feel dizzy and light-headed. This is the one place she feels completely safe…and yet now, she doesn't know if she can be safe here or not.
(In her heart, she knows the answer is that she will always be safe here, but her head doesn't understand this logic, what with Myrnin being a vampire.)
"She isn't dead," is all he says as he makes reference to the woman in his arms. "I have…problems, Claire. I'm sorry. I never meant to kill anyone, truly. It was never my intention, and each death haunts me as I sleep; I mean this absolutely—Claire!" Myrnin breaks off suddenly as he notices Claire's expression turning blank.
He sets the woman he was feeding from down on the ground before flashing across the room to catch Claire before she falls. Myrnin can tell that she's unconscious—from the shock of the discovery, he presumes—and the moments she rests in his arms are the most heavenly he has ever experienced thus far on Earth. But rather than continue to hold her close, now she knows what he is, he sets her down gently on the one bed in the laboratory, pushing a piece of hair back from her face as he stares at her.
"I wanted to tell you why I became this," he murmurs, taking a step back. "It will have to wait until you awaken—if you want to listen, that is."
And with that, he moves away, picking up the unconscious woman on the floor along with her possessions, taking her back to where he found her—sans her memory of him, of course.
Now, all he has to do is wait until Claire comes around so that they can discuss—if she will—what he is…and just what she meant when she referred to loving him.
(As he sits next to Claire, Myrnin dares think that perhaps, Amelie was right…perhaps he was right to have a glimmer of hope inside of him.)
Sleep doesn't bring peace to Claire. Perhaps due to the reason she fell unconscious, perhaps due to what news she has to work through, she can't rest peacefully. Though outwardly she seems still, inside, she's a wreck, unable to comprehend what she discovered about the man she loves.
He's not a man; he's someone who could quite easily hurt her, someone who's unnatural and should probably have died decades before she was even born. But, the other side of her brain is quick to point out, she's been alone with him in here for weeks, and he's never so much as even hinted that he wants to do anything to her. He's been kind, charming…and Claire realises, in the few moments of rationality sleep brings her, she doesn't care what he is. Myrnin isn't a man in the traditional sense, but that's probably how he knows so much—that's the reason she was drawn to him, in a sense, because of the knowledge time has brought him, along with the wisdom and kindness developed along the way.
She hates everything his kind is: he's a murderer; he's a life destroyer; he doesn't regret how his actions impact others, she thinks…and yet he's still Myrnin. He's still the sensitive, funny man she fell in love with, still the man who's taught her more than she ever dreamed of knowing and is capable of teaching her so much more—but until when? When will she stop learning about science? When he kills her? Or when she dies of old age, her love preserved as he is now?
It's in this moment that Claire realises that she isn't scared of what Myrnin is—well, not really—but rather the more pressing issue: she's scared of the future. There are other issues as well, such as why he became what he is, but more importantly, she's wondering about what will happen if she stays with him.
(It's not an issue of if; she already knows that if she wasn't going to stay, she would have ran before fainting. At first she turned her back—and that's not something you do when you're fearful of something.)
Suddenly, Claire's eyes snap open. She's awake.
"Claire." She hears her name spoken softly, and turns her head to see him sitting there by her side. There's nothing but fear in his eyes, and that makes Claire want to laugh, because surely it should be the other way around; she should be scared of him.
"I…can I have some water?" she asks quietly, realising that her throat feels bone dry. How long she's been unconscious she doesn't know, but the darkness in the laboratory gives her the impression that it's at least early evening—later than she's ever been here before.
Myrnin's expression changes slightly, as though he's questioning why she's asking for water rather than running away or demanding questions, but he nods slowly before disappearing. One minute he's there, the next he's gone; it seems to Claire that now she knows what he is, now she has to make a decision, he doesn't want to leave her with the false impression that he's a normal human being.
"Here you go," he says quietly, suddenly appearing at Claire's side with a beaker of water in one hand. "Would you like to move to the chaise lounge in the corner, if you are not…comfortable with your current seat?" he questions, and Claire realises, for the first time, that she's lying on a bed. She presumes that it's his bed—as there would be no reason for him to have two—but it doesn't make her feel uncomfortable, as lying in Shane's bed for the first time did. But for the type of conversation they're going to have, she decides that perhaps the bed isn't the correct location.
"I think that to have a conversation, it would be the best idea to move," Claire replies quietly, after taking a sip of water from the beaker Myrnin handed her. "I'm fine, honestly," she adds as Myrnin moves to assist her sliding from the bed.
A look of hurt flashes across his face, so fast that Claire barely has chance to see it, and it sends stabbing pains through her chest. She doesn't want to hurt him, not when she loves him so dearly, but sometimes it may be unavoidable.
Within minutes, they're seated on the chaise lounge, merely two feet between them, and if she needs any more confirmation that she wants to be with him, this is it. She doesn't feel fear that he's a vampire, not really, but there is one thing—
"Where's the woman?" she asks quickly, her eyes darting around the room as though he's left the body somewhere for her to find. "Did you…?" she trails off, unable to finish her sentence, though she maintains eye contact with Myrnin. She needs to know if he's telling the truth.
"I took her from here and returned her to the public house in which I found her, with no recollection of our meeting," is Myrnin's response, which Claire believes to be true. "She isn't hurt…I never became this to hurt people, Claire…I abhor killing, despise myself a little more for every life I have ever taken."
Claire frowns. "But don't you need to kill people to…stay alive?" she wants to know more about the mechanics of this vampire-thing before she gets onto her pressing questions, but she can feel herself growing impatient at the delay in knowledge.
Myrnin shakes his head, a slight smile upon his lips. "At first, it is hard to avoid it—the need to feed is too strong—but with age comes control, control enough to take only what you need, only when you need it." A slight laugh escapes his lips, and Claire feels her expression turning slightly quizzical. "I never expected to ever have this conversation with anyone, least alone you, my little Claire."
His responses aren't enough for Claire; she has so, so many more questions for him, but she can't hold in her greatest issue any longer. "Why did you become this?" she asks, and the smile upon Myrnin's face fades away into careful neutrality.
"As a child, I became an apprentice to a wizard who was a practised alchemist—he taught me the basics of what I now know—who was…this. He showed me the virtues of turning; the limitless time, the ability to adapt ideas with new discoveries, to understand why the world is as it is. He made me only see the positives to this life, never mentioned the things which interest most when they turn, and it is for that reason I became a vampire." Myrnin blinks slowly and moves the hair from his face, a suddenly despondent expression upon it. "I became this because I wanted to learn forever, Claire, to never have to cease learning and developing my ideas. I never wanted these, never wanted this to happen…never wanted to have people fear what I am." Tears begin to drip down his cheeks, and Claire gasps in a mixture of shock and horror as the fangs she saw earlier drop down from his gums as he speaks, and his eyes flash into a reddish colour.
Myrnin's entire frame begins to shake with the tears shed from his eyes, and every part of Claire aches; she doesn't want him to be in pain, to suffer because of what he is.
(She understands his reasons…and would even make the same decision as him.)
"It's alright," she says hesitantly, not sure whether he wants her to approach him. "Myrnin…I still…I need you, no matter what you are. Please don't cry; it only makes me sad, too," she continues, reaching out slowly to place one hand gingerly upon his shoulder.
Before she knows what's happening, Myrnin's moved and his arms are wrapping around her, pulling their bodies close together. "You have no idea what your words mean to me," he murmurs in her ear, and Claire would be lying if she said she wasn't relieved to feel his fangs are no longer present. "But…I can't. My dear, I cannot take you from the human world to be with me, someone who doesn't deserve you, when there is someone human you can be happy—to an extent—with. I cannot grow old with you; I cannot die with you…and I don't want you to be alone in the next world."
His words crush Claire, because that was exactly what she was hoping he wouldn't say; she was hoping he would have a suggestion that could override the problem—other than the obvious, or what is obvious to Claire at least. "I can't be without you, Myrnin; these two weeks nearly tore me apart. I can't go back to him, I can't," she cries out.
For a moment, she realises how strange this situation is; within a matter of hours, she's gone from discovering he's a vampire and being disgusted, to begging to stay with him now that he's telling her it isn't the best idea.
"Hush, my Claire," Myrnin whispers, his lips pressing against her ear; he's stopped crying, Claire can tell. "I at least think you ought to try going back to him, even though I don't particularly like the sound of him. Please, Claire, try to live a life without me. You should know that whilst I swear I would never deliberately hurt you…there would always be a chance. At least with Shane, you would never fear living to see another dawn."
Somehow, Claire struggles in Myrnin's arms to turn to face him—she thinks he gives her some help, but she ignores that—and begins to pound her fist against his chest, tears streaming down her cheeks.
"No!" she screams, choking on a sob caught in her throat. "You can't make me go back, can't make me go back to someone I don't love just because you could hurt me! If I tell Shane how I love someone else, how I adore science more than I can tolerate him, he'll hurt me then—I can guarantee it." Claire stops moving her fist and leaves it on Myrnin's chest, confirming what she thought before; he has no beating heart. "Please tell me you love me."
Myrnin's unreadable expression softens into something she can understand—love—and he moves to press his lips to her forehead softly. "I love you," he says against her skin, before moving his head back once more. "That's why I'm telling you to leave now. Leave because you deserve to have a life free from fear and pain, from running and regret. I can give you nothing but danger—and that isn't a way to live life."
Claire shakes her head again, more and more vigorously, and she throws herself into his chest; he doesn't move an inch. "Can…I can't do that," she whispers. "But what if…what if I go back for a little while, and see if I can handle it? And if I can't, you'll still be here for me to come back to."
"Yes," he replies, far too quickly, and somewhere deep down inside, Claire knows that it's a lie. "Let's make that agreement; I'll be here for you to come back to if you can't manage to stay there…please know that I'm only doing this because I love you; I want you to live a life worthy of you, to experience everything a woman ought to—children, happiness, old age, a life of security. I don't want you to turn out…regretting what choice you make."
Slowly, Claire wipes the tears from her eyes and looks up at Myrnin, finding herself laughing slightly. "You know that I'm doing this because I love you and I respect what your opinion is," she whispers, lifting a hand to run it through Myrnin's bouncy hair. "And no matter what happens, I will love you more than anyone else in this world—forever, or however long of that I get to experience."
Before she can move away, he's kissing her, and she's kissing him back, and everything's exactly how she wanted it to be; she's happy beyond belief, in the arms of the man she loves…and then it's suddenly ripped away from her. His lips are gone from hers, his arms are no longer wrapped around her; he's let her go.
He's letting her walk away.
Somehow, Claire staggers to an upright position, her eyes never leaving Myrnin's as she does so. She walks slowly towards the door, her eyes locked on his frame when she no longer can make out his eyes from the rest of his face, and when she's at the door and he has been absorbed by the dark shadows, she still tries to imagine that she can see him.
This isn't the last time that she'll see him…she hopes.
As she walks away down the cobbled street, she has to suppress the tears which threaten to consume her, and she attempts to regain her composure for the questions Shane will have for her when she finally makes it home.
(She's scared because she doesn't believe that Myrnin will still even be there tomorrow let alone in the future.)
When she makes it into the house, it's in darkness; the only hint of light, save for that from the moon, is peeking out from under the door to Shane's study, the room she never goes in.
"Come in, Claire," he shouts as she attempts to pass it silently, and Claire knows from just the tone of his voice that this isn't going to be good. She wants to run out from the house now and return to Myrnin, telling him it was impossible to try, but that would be lying; she hasn't given Shane a chance yet.
Tentatively, Claire pushes the door open and stands in the doorway, her hair hanging down from its bun in straggles, her dress damp from the cold air outside. She looks a mess whereas Shane is his usual, pristine self, dressed in a suit even though it must be bedtime now.
"Where have you been?"
Shane's voice is now quiet and deadly, an undertone to it that sounds sinister, and Claire flinches backwards.
"Don't tell me another lie," he continues, as though she hadn't even attempted to speak. "I know that you haven't been helping the Humphries woman; I sent Jasper down there earlier and she said that you come in every now and then to bring food, and then you leave almost immediately. You have been lying to me, Claire…and I dislike liars."
Claire swallows slightly as she takes steps into the study, deciding it's not the best idea to linger in the doorway; the servants could hear, and that isn't something she particularly wants to happen.
Moving closer, however, causes her face to drain of blood and makes her feel as though her heart's stopped as she looks at what's on the table.
The notes she made with Myrnin.
"I…I'm sorry," she whispers, looking at the desk and the stacks of paper all covered in her handwriting rather than Shane. "I didn't mean to hurt you or break your trust, but…but I need science. It's hard to explain; perhaps I've been born in the wrong era, as it's frowned on for my gender to have an interest in it, but I love it…and if I have it, there's nothing I won't do with you." The words spill out, and Claire realises that this is (perhaps) a compromise Myrnin considered before, his brain having reached it faster than hers: if she has science, she can be with Shane, for science is what brought Myrnin and herself together, so it should be enough to keep her with Shane. "If…if you let me learn about science and the things I've adored since childhood, there is literally nothing I will not do for you, Shane."
She lifts her eyes slowly to lock in on Shane's, and soon wishes she hadn't. There's a burning rage in his eyes that she hasn't seen before, and Claire finds herself frozen to the spot, petrified of the man she calls her husband.
"You filthy whore," he snarls at her, and Claire worries for a second that he knows about Myrnin—but he can't. He can't know of her feelings for the vampire Myrnin, at least, only that she's been learning from someone else. "I cannot believe that you, someone born into a high family, would be such a harlot and go into a man's home alone—yes, I have spoken to someone who confirms you have visited the man at the end of the street—and emerge with science knowledge. How did you pay him—sexually? Did you give him what ought to be mine and mine alone?"
As he speaks, Shane moves across the room, closing the gap between him and Claire, and his hand reaches out to slap her cheek, hard. Claire gasps in pain and shock, her eye watering immediately as the sting courses through her body; she never thought that Shane would hurt her.
"He wanted nothing—not like you," she spits at him, anger rising through her. Myrnin told her that she would be safe here, safer than with him, but he was wrong; he would never hurt her for learning, not like Shane. "He taught me because he wanted someone else to know about science…he didn't want sex!"
Shane growls slightly, a feral noise that makes Claire's mind immediately think to vampire and therefore Myrnin, and for this reason, she isn't prepared when Shane shoves her roughly against the wall, pressing his body against hers.
"He didn't want sex—or you managed to avoid it—or perhaps you're lying to me now as well; you've gotten good at that, haven't you, Claire?" he growls in her ear, and Claire realises just what he means to do. "I think you've liked the feel of him against your skin, and that's why you won't touch me anymore…so let's see just what you make of this, then."
"No!" Claire screams as his hands move to the corset at the back of her dress, attempting to loosen it off so he can rip it off of her body. "You can't do this, you can't!" she continues, fighting to get away from Shane as hard as she can—but nothing seems to work.
"You've enjoyed him for so long, so now it's my turn to experience what tricks he's taught you in the bedroom," Shane continues, now ripping at Claire's dress to take it off. One sleeve is ripped clean off, and part of the bodice hangs open, exposing her stomach to the cold air in the room, but Claire doesn't stop fighting. "I'm going to enjoy this more than the first time—you know why."
Claire almost gives up; she squeezes her eyes shut and her body stops attempting to get away as Shane stops ripping her dress and moves his hands to undo his trousers. It would be easier to let him do this; he would forgive her eventually, and at least it could mean she would have the child he so desperately wants…even though it would be sacrificing everything she's ever believed in.
So when Shane's hands are at his waist, she lifts her left knee and gets him inbetween his legs, causing him to groan in pain and stumble backwards.
"I never loved you," Claire snarls as she runs towards the door. "I love him—Myrnin—though I've never been with him because of you; I didn't want to hurt you like that. But he…he's a proper man; he would never do what you just tried to do to me because he respects me. That's something you don't understand. Goodbye, Shane. I'll never see you again, and I'm happy about that."
Before he even manages to stand straight upright, she's gone, running from the room and then the house as fast as she can, desperate to get to Myrnin and to rest in his arms, in order to hope that everything can, perhaps, work out the way she wants in the end.
When she arrives, the laboratory is in darkness, with not even a candle lit to illuminate the place slightly. She supposes that the slight light coming through the open door is enough for his eyes—she never asked about what's different as a vampire, but she thinks that she has enough time to ask him these questions now—but it isn't for her, and as she walks down the stairs into the room, she falls.
"Ow!" she cries out, her ankle twisting and causing her to crash to the ground heavily. She's landed on her ankle, too, and she doesn't feel as though she can get up. "Myrnin?"
She hears movement and there's a sound of a match lighting and a flicker of light before the wick of a candle catches fire, creating a glow bright enough for Claire to see the face of the man she wants…and the signs of someone moving.
Everything on the table has gone, perhaps into one of the boxes that are on the floor next to her, and betrayal spreads through her body. "You're leaving." She says it as a statement, fighting to keep the tears back as Myrnin moves towards her.
He bends over and lifts her with one hand into his arm, before setting her down carefully upon the floor; he looks tired to Claire, and sad—sad that she's back.
"You know why I have to leave—I can't be here if you're going to be with him; it wouldn't be fair on you—what is that on your face?" Myrnin's tone changes as he notices Claire's cheek, suddenly becoming urgent and concerned.
As coolly as possible, Claire shrugs, though the movement causes her to need to hold onto Myrnin for support; her ankle still doesn't seem to be strong enough to support her. "He found my notes and slapped me…before he tried to…he tried to…oh…!" she can't help but burst into tears as she tries to explain what happened in those final moments in the study, but by the way that Myrnin's gaze turns thunderous as he looks at her ripped dress, Claire knows he understands her unspoken message.
"I was wrong," he whispers quietly as he pulls her into his arms. "I'm a monster, but I would never do that to you, not for loving something. I am so, so sorry, Claire, for sending you back; you have to believe that I thought it was in your best interests to be with a human and live life, rather than with me." As he lifts all of her weight into his arms, Claire can feel the steady stream of tears cascade from his eyes down her back, dampening the heavy material of her dress. He's crying, too.
"You're not a monster," she whispers, and from the stiffness of his back, she can tell that she's surprised him. "I can tell you don't want to kill or hurt; you just want to love and to learn…and that isn't what a monster does. Yes, you've hurt and killed before, and you could kill again, but you regret it—and that's what marks you out as being someone worthy of love, of living life with happiness to guide you to your next decision. That isn't what makes you someone who feels they should hide away and never be happy."
Claire leans backwards as far as Myrnin's arms will allow her, so that she can see his face. "I love you," she says. "And I want to be with you—forever." She knows the connotations of this word, knows what it means to Myrnin, and she doesn't care.
She knows nothing about the process, knows nothing about what she'll be like if this happens; all she knows is that she will have eternity to be with Myrnin and to learn from him—and with him.
Myrnin shakes his head. "I'm not taking your humanity from you; you may change your mind. I will be with you, but I can't…I can't do that to you."
Without any planning whatsoever, Claire leans forwards and presses her lips to Myrnin's, just as she did weeks ago—but this time, she knows that this is what she wants, and there's nothing to stop her doing it. Myrnin kisses her back, pulling her body as close to his as possible, and for the first time, Claire feels completely able to relax; she finally has the chance to be happy.
"I'm never going to want anything more than science and you," she whispers against his chest as soon as they break apart from one another. "So please, Myrnin; if you want to make me happy, this is the way."
"You want to learn forever," he states. "As do I. And who am I to stop you living forever to do this?"
His lips press against her neck before his fangs burst through her skin, and Claire knows that if she regretted her decision, this would be the moment, as the excruciating pain of losing her life begins.
But she regrets nothing—because now, she has the chance to be with Myrnin forever.
I'd really appreciate it if you review if you've read this, and if anyone has any requests for me to write in the future, I'll definitely consider them!


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NY Stone Barns Farm Harvest Fest 2014
Me and Dave are very much into being a part of our local Westchester NY community and especially love visiting the farms of our county as it feels like such a privilege to have them so close just at our fingertips. One of our favorites to visit is Stone Barns Farm right around the corner of Pleasantville, New York and in the spirit of giving back, I decided that one thing I could donate to them was my time and photography. They invited me to capture their Harvest Fest on October 5th and it was such a pleasure. Even in college when I first started honing in on my photography interests, I knew that people would always be my primary focus. I love freezing in time the moments of human interaction that sweep past the periphery faster than you can blink the eye. Childhood, family, the Fall season, the joy of taking a day off from work, being with animals -- these were all my primary focus at Harvest Fest and it felt so good to truly connect with what I first loved about photography as well as to connect the dots to what I am enjoying now with Old New House. Everything we sell is handmade, from a long time ago or today by me + Dave, and my initial connection is with the idea of who made it and how they intended it to be enjoyed, with the second connection being who will have it in their home and how they will enjoy it. It is a beautiful process to me and Harvest Fest has gotten me especially excited to photograph our new line of tables and to share them with the world!!
Persian Rug in Modern Context: ONH Sourcing Series 7
I chatted with an antique business owner recently and he said something that really struck me -- he said while he likes putting old rugs in his windows for display, he would never choose a traditional motif rug -- like a Sarouk or Kashan. He looked physically ill even talking about these types, for him it was tribal all the way. We each have our own tastes and preferences but I really and truly do believe that "traditional design" Persian rugs are very underrated. They can feel grandma-esque if you have the plastic covering over your couch to match but if you pair your traditional rug with modern or eclectic decor, it no longer looks so traditional or old lady but actually takes on a very cool and playful presence. A handmade rug is a work of art so it has to mix and match well with your style and other art but just as you would pick out pillows to have pops of color or interesting lines and shapes, your rug can be the perfect inspiration for a multifaceted kind of room. I read an article where they compared a classic oriental carpet to a classic Chanel suit -- they both truly never go out of style!
Here are my picks for awesome pairings of traditional rugs with hip and/or non super traditional decor.
Now off to decorating my own house!
Rug and Accents Color Study: RED
After a couple weeks of traveling all over Tennessee, Kentucky and Alabama to see family, photograph a wedding, and shop for some ONH additions of course, I cannot even begin to express how good it feels to finally be home! Even though we journeyed high and low and made tons of new connections, we wound up acquiring only one new piece for the shop. But what a piece it is! While it awaits being photographed, I find myself daydreaming about it constantly. It is a unique size vintage light red Lilihan rug that is just so incredibly sweet and stunning at the same time. If we had a space for it in our home, naturally it would be belong to me but alas, it does not have a perfect spot in our dwelling and it awaits someone else falling in love with it! But needless to say this rug has gotten me thinking about the types of carpets and designs in general I am consistently attracted to. Oddly enough I like the traditional type of designs -- that of the Kerman and Sarouk rugs. I like geometric and tribal as well but I am always oohing and aahing over those dainty and feminine more traditional varieties. And red, always with the red. A good blue is always nice but man, does that red speak to me in the home. I don't if it is the bold or if all of my other decor is light and so I yearn that pop of color, but I simply cannot get enough. Seems I am not alone either as many people are drawn to adding the vibrant red to their home decor. Here's a look at some great interiors with red rugs + accents as well as my pile up of some awesome rugs with red of our own.
1. Photo from noctomic.com 2. Photo from RugRag.com 3. Photo from lonny.com 4. Photo from noctomic.com 5. Photo from lonny.com
I especially love how red can fit in with so many different home styles. It is versatile yet bold. Here's to a colorful week with lots of cozy time in your homes!
Oriental Rug in the Kitchen: ONH Sourcing Series 6
Home is where the food is? For those of us who enjoy looking through home design blogs or flipping through decorating books and magazines for hours on end while we try to dream up our own perfect additions and creations, we have all seen the oriental rug in a kitchen look. It is one I am still not completely sold on because while I LOVE the aesthetic, a kitchen (at least say, my kitchen) is known for getting a bit well, gross. What happens in the sink should stay in the sink but that is a best laid plan and at least in my busy sink moments of trying to do things while my baby calls for something else from his high chair, I find that the floor in front of the sink can take quite a beating (hello spills, splatters, and breaks) and some rugs do not seem like good candidates for taking this kind of abuse. Okay, I am being a bit dramatic. But I love rugs. And again while I LOVE the look of the antique oriental rug being next to the sink in the kitchen, I think it should be a very well-thought out move. If you are not constantly cooking and cleaning after cooking, I think the situation is much less risky. Only you know all of your kitchen habits and behaviors and only you can know if having a nice rug down will be something that will be worth the aesthetic boost in a very comforting place of the home. If you are thinking the look and the lifestyle of having an oriental rug down in the kitchen is definitely for you, I highly recommend this montage on stylecarrot.com as it completely lends itself to the ultimate inspiration with a wide array of types displayed. Below are my top two favorite kitchens mentioned in the post and my ONH picks for sourcing rugs just like the ones featured!
1. Runners for elongated kitchen.
2. Area rug size in the middle of the kitchen. I am in love with the Elle photograph below of Ginnifer Goodwin in her kitchen with a lovely antique rug underneath her feet. Her kitchen looks modern and subdued, but most importantly a mixture of stylish and cozy. I usually gravitate towards a bright, white type of kitchen but I love how sleek this one is and I feel like the rug is rather unexpected but adds the homey feel. Immediately reminded me of a couple pieces we have that I love and I had to share them!
That's it for this week -- hope everyone is enjoying the weekend in their rug-more or rug-less kitchens! xoxo, Melissa

subset: commoncrawl


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Cold Duck
Here's a commissionned portrait of the late great saxophone player Eddie Harris who composed the great jazz standard "Cold Duck". Amazing musician and composer ! The artwork's background is featuring the theme of his 1st solo album called "Exodus to Jazz". (click on the pic to enlarge it)


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Common Knowledge is a project that promotes wild edible and medicinal plant education through a visual vocabulary of plant illustrations accessed through interactive and participatory learning tools. It is a cultural platform for sharing cross-cultural information and engaging with children and adults alike. Common Knowledge advocates for an increased awareness of our natural environment while promoting the idea that plant knowledge should exist as common knowledge. We conduct workshops, construct installations and have created card games, and activity-based coloring books. All printed imagery contain common healing plants that are found in the environment in which the workshop or installation is held or wherever a Common Knowledge product is sold.
This project is an idea rooted in "green" philosophies, alternative pedagogies, nutritional activism and the principles of a gift economy. With our ever-increasing interest in alternative andnatural healing Common Knowledge intends to propagate multi-cultural conversations around our ages-old symbiotic relationship with the plant world, which provides us with physical, mental, emotional and spiritual sustenance. Common Knowledge will operate regionally and has started its journey by showcasing plants found in every city of the north eastern US. These species are strong, resilient and actively work to restore nutrients to damaged city soil. They also are not only superior in nutrition but are an example of strength, resiliency, endurance and perseverance against the conflicting odds of an urban landscape. Perhaps they can help guide us to do the same.
"The more something is shared, the greater the value becomes." - Robin Wall Kimmerer. This project is my gift as an artist to increase the awareness of the enormous gifts of the plant world.


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Transport in Cape Town
Cape Town is one of the easiest cities in South Africa to navigate, whether by car, bus, taxi, rail, bicycle or on foot. The city is bicycle and pedestrian friendly, with a network of clearly marked bicycle lanes and walkways across Cape Town.
The city's integrated public transport network (MyCiTi bus system), a legacy from the 2010 FIFA World Cup, is a fantastic new resource, as it enables easy access between the central city and Cape Town International Airport, to and from big tourism attractions, popular shopping precincts and event venues.
MyCiTi services connect some of Cape Town's greatest tourist attractions and leisure opportunities. These include the vibrant entertainment zones of Long and Kloof Street, the historic central city, the Green Point Urban Park, the Sea Point and Mouille Point beachfronts, the V&A Waterfront and the beaches along Blouberg, Big Bay and Melkbosstrand.
There are also services running to Camps Bay, giving access to the Table Mountain Cableway and Camps Bay beach, as well as to Century City, Hout Bay and the famous Clifton beaches.
Metered cab and taxi services are abundant and available 24 hours a day. Tariffs range between R10 – R15 per kilometer.
While the railway system in Cape Town is mainly focused on commuter transport, The Southern Line Rail Route, which stretches from Cape Town to Simon's Town, is highly recommended for visitors. The train stops at several beautiful suburbs and coastal villages along the way and is an affordable option.
Train travel does not always run on schedule, so it's important to bear this in mind when planning a day out. As with train travel in most parts of the world, it is also important to be aware of potential pickpockets.
Cape Town also boasts a 2.6 km Fan Walk between the city centre and the Cape Town Stadium. The walkway, developed for the 2010 FIFA World Cup, is pedestrian link along Darling, Strand, Adderley, Riebeek and Waterkant streets, through to Somerset Road, with dedicated pedestrian paths across Buitengracht Street and Western Boulevard and Public Squares at St Andrews and the Stadium Forecourt within the Green Point Urban Park.
Transport for Cape Town manages and controls all aspects of Cape Town public transport, in an integrated, cost effective way, for the benefit of all visitors and citizens.
For more information, visit Transport for Cape Town. For the MyCiTi bus schedule and more information about the routes, visit MyCiti.
Cape Town International Airport
Cape Town International Airport is regularly voted the best Airport in Africa. Fifteen International Airlines operate at Cape Town International Airport, with 89 flights per week. For a list of the direct international flights flying into Cape Town, download Cape Town International Airport Facts.
Train tours
Rediscover the joys of travelling by train
Cape Town's top destinations to discover by rail include Simon's Town, Fish Hoek, Muizenberg and Stellenbosch.
There are only a few cities in the world that can offer visitors the splendour of travelling along a rugged coastline and spotting whales from your train carriage windows, or seeing the splendour of vineyards while travelling through Stellenbosch in the Cape Winelands. Closer to the city, visitors can catch a train to Khayelitsha to savour a cup of coffee from the Department of Coffee or enjoy the spectacular views of Table Mountain, a New 7 Wonder of Nature, from atop Lookout Hill – Khayelitsha's main tourist attraction.
For more information about the city's rail tours, contact Metrorail on +27 21 449-2366 or e-mail email@example.com


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The mission of Coordinated School Health is to create a school community which delivers a consistent message in support of healthy lifestyles for students and staff.
Deer Park Independent School District
2800 Texas Avenue | Deer Park, TX 77536
Phone: 832.668.7000
For questions or comments about www.dpisd.org please contact firstname.lastname@example.com.
Compliance Statement | Website Disclaimer
All Content © Deer Park ISD | Powered by Schoolwires
All Content © Deer Park ISD Powered by Schoolwires


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Barry: Hey guys
Rich: 'bout time.
Fred: The big jt
John: Sorry, had sixth-grade math homework to correct. Fifth grade was so much easier
Fred: the grand slam is here
Barry: Alright, let's do this thing.
Barry: 1. Alright, let's deal with this. For some reason, there's a lot of interest in Brady Quinn's mechanics. Speculate on why a throwing style sufficient for Charlie Weis and Notre Dame is inadequate for the NFL.
Fred: Coaches justifying their jobs or they do it better
John: It's a BS argument perpetuated by some "insiders".
Rich: It's all a matter of teaching. One guy show it one way, another shows it his way. Remnember when Chris Palmer changed the way Tim
Couch threw the ball?
Barry: That worked out great for both Palmer and Couch
Rich: Yeah. Both bombed.
John: His mechanics are fine. They might need tweaked, but everybody's does.
Barry: I'm with Fred on this one... I think there are just so many coaches these days that they all have to find something to do.
Rich: Quinn will be fine. He's smart enough and savvy enough to pick up on these things.
Fred: I watched Chud yelling at guys, to me, just to show he was in charge
John: Rack Passan.
Rich: Yeah, but down deep, he really loves them.
Barry: If Scherer really wants a challenge, turn Dorsey into an NFL QB
Rich: Not even Paul Brown could do that.
Fred: he looked the best of the four Tuesday
John: OTAs, Fred, OTAs
Barry: Actually he looked pretty good, but he was against rookie free agent level competition
Rich: Let's not get too excited above these contrived practices.
Fred: i'm not reading anything into it. I just said what I saw
John: You mean those players you got excited about two weeks ago Barry?
Barry: They cut the one I was excited about
Rich: Yeah. Anyone in favor of eliminating OTAs?
Fred: let's go back to the days of fall only football
Rich: They prove nothing.
John: I'm in favor of eliminating the dissecting of OTAs like they're the Super Bowl.
Barry: 2. MATH STORY PROBLEM: A week after showing up a day late to the OTAs, Braylon Edwards practiced with the third team in front of the alert eyes of the assembled media. Assign rough percentages (summing to 100%) of how much of this move was (A) Punitive, (B) Demonstrating that RAC is in command, and (C) Actually because Edwards is behind learning the playbook.
Rich: (D) None of the above.
Fred: Just showing BE who's in charge
John: An attempt at (B)
Rich: It's the OTAs for crying out loud.
Barry: You mean that putting Braylon with the third team meant absolutely nothing?
Rich: Anyone really believe Braylon will work with the third team in training camp?
Fred: window dressing
Barry: Of course not, but there was some sort of message there, or he wouldn't have done it.
Rich: Less than a slap on the wrist. More like a belt behind the head.
John: Barry: come July, yes.
Rich: Message, schmessage.
Rich: One more time: THESE ARE THE OTAs.
Barry: Man, you guys are cranky. Cranky, cranky, cranky.
Barry: Fred's in a decent mood, but you other two just seem testy about the tenor of my brilliant questions.
John: I gotta side with Rich on this whole OTA BS.
Rich: This argument isn't worth arguing about.
Fred: it's a joke
Rich: i thought you were a baritone.
John: FU McBride
Barry: LOL
Barry: Alright then, moving on.
Fred: is that like fu manchus?
Barry: 3. The New York Times and various other sources today reported that Mark Cuban is among investors looking to launch another professional football league. After the failures of the USFL and XFL, do you think the third time will be the charm?
Rich: No
Rich: Way
Rich: Jose
Fred: no
John: Lemme think... nope.
Fred: the usfl would have worked until the Trumps started bidding on players like Herschel Walker
Rich: Just another way of keeping his name out there.
John: The USFL woulda worked if some owners didn't want the season moved to the fall to compete with the NFL head-to-head
Barry: Because the NFL is so good, or because there's only so much football the world needs?
Rich: The latter.
John: Both Barry
Fred: Rich, I worked with the Arizona Wranglers and helped the Browns get Minnifield.
Rich: The USFL owners actually won that lawsuit, if you'll recall. And won $3 in damages.
Barry: Remember that...
Rich: actually
Barry: If the XFL didn't work three years after Cleveland and Houston getting backstabbed, I guess this won't either.
Rich: And that was treble damages.
Rich: I'm surprised the XFL lasted as long as it did.
Barry: They had a TV network backing them from Day one and still failed.
Fred: the USFL was the best place for the Browns to get players. Mack, Johnson, Fike, Minnifield, McNeil
Rich: I think they might be looking for a nice tax writeoff.
John: Or become a minor league for the NFL
Barry: Shame. Oh, well. I wish 'em luck. I'd like the NFL to have to compete with someone.
Barry: Noting how much the NFL loves open competition.
John: Amen Mr. McBride
Rich: The NFL doesn't need a minor league. It's already got one. It's called college.
John: Shut up with your salient arguments Passan
Barry: Yeah, and it's completely free of expenses for them, Rich. Good arrangement.
Barry: 4. We saw Syndric Steptoe, Josh Cribbs, and Brandon "Let it Roll" McDonald shagging punts yesterday at camp. Noting that other candidates like Sean Jones, Tim Carter and others might be in the mix, give us your pre-season favorite for the team's punt return job.
Fred: Cribbs
John: Steptoe, just because I like typing his name.
Rich: Probably Steptoe and Eric Wright.
Barry: Oh, I should mention Antonio Perkins too
Rich: Please don't.
Fred: don't bother
Barry: Not that he was shagging punts, but I need to mention his name until he leaves.
Rich: OK, go ahead.
Barry: He was playing CB on the third team, in the same def backfield as Jeremy LeSeuer.
Fred: and Jereme Perry
Rich: That means he was defending Edwards?
Barry: You can't defend Edwards, Rich.
Barry: But I think he's behind Therrian Fontenot on the depth chart.
Rich: What in the world did Savage see in this guy to draft him in the fourth round?
Barry: A red helmet, I think.
Fred: oklahoma
Rich: The same kind that Brodney Pool wore?
Barry: Same one, Rich
Barry: OK, our last QB question of the day.
Barry: 5. After two OTA sessions, with a third and a mini-camp dawning, let's play "Rank the QBs". List them from 1-4 in terms of their readiness to start.
Rich: Anderson, Frye, Quinn, Dorsey
Fred: frye, anderson, quinn and dorsey
John: Anderson/Quinn, Anderson, Quinn, Frye
Fred: what about the facade at OL, put Thomas at LT and get on with it.
Barry: Hear, hear
John: CHEERS!
Rich: Of course.
Barry: Stop wasting time. Get him in there and let him go.
Rich: Why not?
Fred: that's why I call it a facade. They pretend Shaffer has to lose the job. What a joke
Rich: None of this BS. Throw him in there, let him make his mistakes, learn from them and then go on and play for the least the next 10
Barry: BTW, I think Rich's ordering is the right one right now. I'd put Anderson slightly ahead of Frye.
Rich: At least the next 10 years.
Barry: OK, hang onto your hats, fellas.
Barry: LIGHTNING ROUND
Barry: LIGHTNING ROUND
Barry: LIGHTNING ROUND
Barry: 1. Name the precise date that you will tire of hearing that the defense is ahead of the offense because the offensive scheme is new: (A) 5/30 (B) 6/15 (C) 7/1 (D) 7/28 (E) 9/4
Rich: yesterday
Fred: b
John: 5/23
Barry: You guys keep going outside the listed parameters of the questions.
Barry: (Sad shake of head)
John: Expand your parameters
Fred: i didn't
Rich: That sentence should be eliminated from the coachspeak manual.
John: Me and Rich are cranky, remember...
Barry: I'm not providing correct answers this week, because I believe the best writing leaves an element of mystery.
Barry: 2. The Browns hope to get a contribution from two of their 2006 mid-to-late picks in this year. Of (A) Travis Wilson, (B) Isaac Sowells, (C) DeMario Minter, and (D) Jerome Harrison, pick the two you think will make the most significant contribution during the upcoming
Rich: Wilson and Harison.
Fred: harrison and wilson
Barry: (Waiting for Taylor to list Lawrence Vickers)
Rich: Harrison
John: B and D
Rich: Sowells doesn't stand a chance.
John: Based on OTAs Rich?
Barry: I saw Minter in as the nickel back with the first team and the gunner on punt coverage. Just sayin.
Fred: i think minter has a chance
Rich: Why not? Seth McKinney and/or Ryan Tucker.
Fred: tucker at rg
John: All I'm saying is to not discount Sowells.
Barry: He was the second team RG in practice.
Rich: Minter's biggest problem is his hands. Made only one interception in college.
Barry: Then again, Keg Hoffman was the second team LG
Rich: Sowells is not good enough to crack the starting lineup.
Barry: If we wanted interceptions and nothing else, Earl Little's number would be retired. Harrumph.
John: You know that how Rich?
Rich: McKinney is a far better player. So is Tucker. Who is Sowells gonna beat out and why?
Barry: Because Coleman and Andruzzi somehow started every game last year. Yikes.
Fred: can't have enough depth
John: No, you answer why Sowells is not good enough. I wann know what that is based upon.
Rich: What does that have to do with Steinbach, McKinney and Tucker?
Barry: FYI, Crennel said we won't really know if McKinney is healthy until there's contact.
Rich: Lennie Friedman is better than Sowells.
Barry: This is the lightning round, but I like watching people argue...
John: Stop just throwing shit out there Rich. Explain how you've come to this conclusion.
Rich: John, do you think Sowells is better right now than the aforementioned?
John: I think he has the "potential" to be. And I think I agree with the coaching staff that he will hit that mark sooner rather than later.
John: I think he holds serve against both McKinney and Tucker at RG RIGHT NOW, based on talent
Rich: You know what I think about potential. Charlie Frye had potential to be a good quarterback. Potential, to my way of thinking, means
you're not good enough.
John: No, he doesn't Rich. That's a crock.
Rich: Based on what talent?
John: And you don't believe that for a nano-second.
Fred: Phil drafted him with the idea of being a starter in the second or third year. I haven't seen enough of him to have an opinion
Barry: Alright. I personally see Sowells as the mutant offspring of Chris Crocker and Enoch Demar.
Barry: He's an IU lineman no one expected to be good, and the Browns think they're clever because they drafted him with another
position in mind.
Rich: The only reason Sowells make this team is Savage is holding out hope for him to blossom.
John: The high-ankle sprain and switching positions slowed his development. Just don't shortchange him Rich.
Barry: 3. What most accurately describes your reaction when you learned on Tuesday that Leon Williams had off-season ankle surgery (A) Unsurprised (I know all, see all), (B) Shocked (SHOCKED!) that the Browns would not freely give out this information (C) Surprised that we didn't learn he had been hit by a Buick.
Fred: a
Rich: (D) All of the above
John: All three
John: Haha, beat ya Old Man
Rich: No ya didn't.
Rich: Check it out.
Barry: I don't recall providing (D) as an option, but I'm getting used to the improvisation.
John: Plus, I capitalized both "old" and "man" to show some respect for the elderly.
John: Errrr, aged.
Rich: Upper case, lower case, makes no difference.
Barry: 4. Given that the USFL had Donald Trump, the XFL had Vince McMahon, and the UFL has Mark Cuban, name the most likely reality show to be created by the proposed UFL: (A) "So You Think You Can Long Snap?", (B) "Communal Shower Idol", (C) "Is Anyone Here Smarter than a Fifth Grader?", (D) "Jesse Palmer: The Starter"
Fred: d
John: A
Rich: (D) All of the above
John: LMAO!!!
Barry: Dammit! He's unstoppable!
John: Shouldn't it be (E), though?
Barry: That would be (E), troublemaker
Rich: You forgot "Dancing with the Owners"
John: He forgot it for a reason.
Barry: Alright, lets' finish this
Barry: 5. How disappointed are you that I can't come up with a decent fifth lightning round question: (A) Not at all, because I support our publisher regardless of how stupid he is, (B) Mildly, because I just love these freaking things more than life itself (C) Extremely, because as a member of the media I'm supposed to get cranky about darn near everything.
Rich: A solid (A)
Barry: Thanks Rich. That's the correct answer
Fred: a
John: (E)
Barry: That translates to (C) for me, you crank.
Rich: Do I get the evening's lovely paring gift?
John: Rich is cranky?
Barry: Being invited back next week is gift enough.
Fred: Indians 8,sox 2
Rich: 'bout time
Barry: That's why Jeff isn't here. He's bumming about his Sox.
Barry: Alright, that's a wrap folks. We'll try this again next week.
Fred: good night
John: Loads of fun. Loads.
Barry: Later!
Rich: As always and forevermore, Shalom, guys.
Death Chat 2007: Cranky Media Edition
The OBR Top Stories
Browns open camp on July 27; scrimmage Aug. 4The Browns will open training camp on July 27.
The OBRTuesday at 6:07 AM
Injuries in English: Garrett's Foot InjuryThe OBR's injury guru Brandon Bowers breaks down what to expect with Myles Garrett's foot injury.
The OBR06/17/2017
Browns Mini-Camp Photo Gallery, Part 2Here's the second part of our Summer Mini-Camp photo gallery. Photos provided by USA Today Sports Images!
The OBR06/17/2017
Is Browns Foundation In Place?Going into their second season, has the new regime set a foundation for the Browns?
The OBR06/16/2017


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Mellow Trivia
Pint Night
Every pint night is different, but you can be assured that we will have specials on your favorite pints of craft beer! If you're lucky, you may even get to keep the glass. So share a pint with your best buds!
House of Shroom
Introducing … House of Shroom, Mellow Mushroom's unique clothing and accessories collection. Click here to explore: http://www.houseofshroom.com/
Gluten-Free Dough
We now carry Gluten Free dough! Create your own pizza with a variety of Gluten Free ingredients!
Mellow Mushroom provides wireless internet service for our customers to make life a little easier.
Enjoy the gorgeous weather and people watch as you dine on our outside patio.
We have many Vegan menu options to choose from including dairy free Daiya Vegan cheese. Call us for details.
Mellow Mushroom's menu showcases natural flavors and the freshest of ingredients in a creative menu assortment of pizzas, hoagies, salads, calzones, appetizers and vegetarian and vegan options. Gluten free crust and a kids menu are also available.
Mellow Mushroom is more than just awesome pizza and craft beer; it is a state of mind. There is also craft apparel. House of Shroom style, Mellow Mushroom's exclusive apparel line, is available for purchase in store. The full collection is available online at http://www.houseofshroom.com/.
In our lot and mall parking lot.
Catering inquiries please email: email@example.com
We'd be more than happy to take this show on the road to your home or office! Just give us a call and we'll take it from there: 252-565-8220. We accept all major credit cards and have a minimum of $150 per order. The only thing we ask is that you give us as much of a head's up as possible, so we can be sure to accommdate you.
Wanting to have some Mellow for lunch but can't get away from the office!? Well TableTakeout.com is your solution. Table Takeout is an outside service that takes care of smaller deliveries for us and they can deliver any time of day that we are open. Great, fast, and easy service to use!


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This property is no longer available.Search for Available Property.
1.1 acres in Maricopa County, Arizona
The next best lot in the village of Sunrise. Over an acre, this spacious corner lot features protected mountain and sunset views. Sunrise Lot 299 is a quiet, big, easy build with protected views. NO CAVE CREEK RD, NO DESERT MOUNTAIN PARKWAY, PRIVATE. Price does not include a membership, but Golf or Lifestyle Memberships are available for purchase through the Desert Mountain Club.
Cave Creek Road and Desert Mountain Parkway Directions: Desert Mountain entrance is on Cave Creek Road, one mile east of Pima Road.
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NOTE: The information contained herein is provided as general information only and has been obtained from sources deemed reliable. It is provided without any guaranty, warranty or representation, expressed or implied, made by Lands of America, or any related entity, as to the accuracy or completeness of the information. The information is presented subject to errors, omissions, change of price or conditions, prior sale or withdrawal without notice. Prospective purchasers should make their own investigations, projections and conclusions concerning the information.


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Patrice O'Neal
Ladies, put down your Cosmo mags: Patrice O'Neal will tell you what men want. "We need filth," the comedian says in one bit. In another, O'Neal gives women advice on the best noises to make in bed: "Make a sound between retarded and choking; that's sexy to us." You might be disgusted, but O'Neal is no worse than the countless magazines that tout ways to "please your man" issue after issue. At least he's consistent and honest.
"When you're a whore, be a whore for you. Don't be a whore for me," O'Neal said during his set on HBOs One Night Stand. Besides cable, O'Neal's relationship advice has also been seen on the Late Show with David Letterman and The Ellen DeGeneres Show and heard on Opie and Anthony. 8 and 10:30 p.m. Friday and Saturday, and 7:30 p.m. Sunday. The Improv, 7620 Katy Freeway. For information, call 713-333-8800 or visit www.improvhouston.com. $20.
June 11-12, 8 & 10:30 p.m.; Sun., June 13, 7:30 p.m., 2010
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Best Typo Ever Runs A-1 in the Los Angeles Times
Updated with explanation from Assistant Managing Editor for Copy Desks, Library and Standards Henry Fuhrmann.
The Los Angeles Times has an excellent story in A-1 today about a legendary Las Vegas sheriff. 85-year-old Ralph Lamb, "The Cowboy Sheriff," John M. Glionna writes, was once the most powerful man in Nevada--feared by gangsters, beloved by locals, respected by fellow lawmen.
It's a great read--made even greater by what may be the best typo to ever run in the Times.
The section in question:
Goodman called the sheriff to arrange a meeting. Lamb agreed to meet at 5 the next day. "OK, I'll see you at 5 p.m.," Goodman recalls saying. "He said, 'No, 5 a.m.' That's the kind of guy he was. It was a Wild West town back then, and Lamb had a bunch of tough deputies who were there to do his bidding."
Butt cracks eventually appeared in Lamb's public persona...
Upcoming Events
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The mistake is corrected in the online edition.
Is it even possible that this was an accident? We reached out to Glionna, butt he declined to comment.
Update at 1:35pm After initially declining to comment, Glionna (who just landed in Colorado to cover the shooting in Aurora) did confirm that the mistake was not in the copy he submitted. He said he is not sweating the incident though, adding, copy editors "have saved my ass so many times."
Update at 4:45pm Assistant Managing Editor for Copy Desks, Library and Standards Henry Fuhrmann explains:
This may be more detail than you need, but the mistake occurred at the final stage of production. The article had already been copy edited (and, yes, spell-checked). The copy editor decided, for reasons of appearance, to move the drop cap (i.e., large capital letter) from the paragraph in question to a position three paragraphs lower. In changing the computer coding involved, he also inadvertently changed the spelling.
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The 2016-17 Colors: Indigo Blue & Black!
You can purchase a variety of merchandise that identifies you as a member or supporter of the
Capital Region's premier youth music organization, ESYO!
Deadline for holiday orders has passed. Merchandise will be available for purchase at ESYO's Playathon, Feb. 4, 2017, at Crossgates Mall.


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I'm safe and sound, back in Savannah after that whirlwind trip.
This lovely cream pitcher and bowl set is from Vallauris (sp?) France, where I got it a couple of years ago.
Monday, April 23, 2012
Batik Table Runner is in Use!
Posted by Michelle @ Periwinkle at 3:41 PM
Labels: batiks, Christchian, flowers, table runner, yo-yo
6 comments:
He is darn cute!ReplyDelete
And so are the table runner and the flowers!
This comment has been removed by the author.ReplyDelete
- AnonymousApril 24, 2012 at 11:16 AM
he's a dear little boy! isn't being a gramma fun?ReplyDelete
and i see great possibilities for those yo-yo and button flowers....
(i did try to post on your other blog but it wouldn't let me - suffice it to say i am looking forward to watching your lovely pots grow!)Replies
yes, molly, I'm hoping to see lots of him when we get back home. I think he likes to listen to books.Delete
I am mystified by why blogger doesn't seem to let people leave comments some times, very odd.
Dear Michelle, what u did amazed me! i love batik and do batik.ReplyDelete
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Alva Old Churchyard and Cemetery is situated in a quiet peaceful area of Clackmananshire.
The old Church which according to notices was burnt down in 1984 having been out of use since 1980 has some lovely old stones still in the graveyard. We photographed over 2300 stones from the Churchyard and Cemetery.
They have all been added to this fully searchable CD and cover dates 1631-2011.
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dollarfifty Review
Just what I wanted
We order 2, one for each window and the coffee table. Perfect fit. Only thing is some of the slate pieces seemed thicker than others. But after seeing all three pieces put together, we relized it must be the nature of the slate. All in all, we are very happy.
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Senators Ted Cruz and Mike Lee have challenged Obama's new Attorney General appointee to denounce the President's amnesty plans; a tall order for anyone in bed with Obama, but one which would quickly determine the motivations behind any top government official. Obama nominated Loretta Lynch, who is currently the U.S. Attorney for the Eastern District of New York, to replace Eric Holder, who will remain the head of the Department of Justice until his successor is confirmed.
(Read More: Hispanics Turn On Obama, Heckler Interrupts President's Amnesty Speech)
Senator Mitch McConnell jumped on board with Cruz and Lee, saying:
"As attorney general, Eric Holder too often put political and ideological commitments ahead of the rule of law. That's not something the American people expect in the nation's highest law-enforcement official, and it's something Mr. Holder's replacement should commit to avoiding at all costs as a condition of his or her confirmation — whether it relates to the President's acting unilaterally on immigration or anything else."
Senator Rand Paul also agreed with Cruz and Lee, commenting:
"I think the attorney general should, whoever the nominee is, acknowledge that they will operate independent of politics, independent of the president and under the direction of the Constitution. The Constitution really doesn't allow the president to legislate. It's a host of issues; I wouldn't limit it to just immigration."
(Read More: Racist Pro-Amnesty Lib Gets OWNED By African American Man)
In Obama's nomination speech, he praised Lynch for her commitment to "fairness, equality, and justice," but it remains to be seen if she will actually live up this reputation. If she aims to, she should start by voicing her opposition of Obama's plan to sign an executive order granting amnesty to millions of illegal immigrants. She could prove herself as a patriot in one sentence, however, it would be a bold move to defy the man who appointed her.
It's no secret that Obama places his cronies in positions of power; appointing those whom he is sure will further his radical agenda. We'll be watching to see how Ms. Lynch feels regarding amnesty. Do you think she is likely to accept the challenge from Cruz and Lee? Sound off in the comments section.
H/T: Conservative Tribune


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Everyone must want to take a bath inside clean and neat bathroom. This condition emerges high passion for taking a bath since the user will feel the strong prestigious nuance. There are many ideas of bathroom storages such like shelves, cabinet, racks, etc. For having this good looking room, you need to install useful storages in clever placement so these features will not bother your movement. You may integrate the cabinet with the sink vanity. If you have small bathroom then you can consider for installing storages in floating placement such as mounting towel rack or sunken open shelves wall unit. Do you have same opinion with me? How about adding Lowes bathroom cabinets?
This moment, we want to share information about cool Lowes bathroom cabinets and sinks ideas feats black marble vanity top. I hope that you can get load of inspirations after seeing these images below. Let's start the virtual tour! First inspirational image presents appealing black white guest bathroom decor ideas for small space with compact white wooden sink cabinet vanity designed by Lowes. There is trough round sink below compact rectangle mirror embellished with medicine cabinet built in. At the corner section of this room, there is lush greenery houseplant beside medium bay window aside.
Other chic image presents amusing master bathroom decor with corner powder room in the small attic overlooking with slanted white ceiling architecture. This room contains classic painted black Lowes bathroom cabinets over toilets below elliptical mirror on plain beige wall paint color. There is round white bowl sink below small curved steel faucet. Beautify the simple vanity top with cute flower arrangement inside transparent glass vase and towel rack wall unit. Cool wall tiles pattern adorns the minimalist bathroom like shown in images below. There are many considerable patterns which are alternating, checkered, plaid, etc.


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My Thoughts
Pulse-pumping, tear-inciting, melt-my-heart-to-the-ground-and-won't-let-me-go amazing. It's an emotional gut punch. Beautiful. Romantic. And super hot. One of my favorite reads of the year!
- Related Posts: My review of Collide, 2013 Favorites, Mega Alphas
How do you keep existing when your heart is so splintered, so completely torn to shreds, your pulse is fading?
You're…broken. How do you move forward when every breath is nothing more than a constant ache? Living becomes an insidious reminder that you threw away the single largest part of yourself. Your…soul. No amount of distraction can pull you from the torture of losing your…life.
Now that Emily Cooper has walked away from her first love, she finds herself running toward her only love. Unraveling fast, but clinging to hope, Emily risks all she has left on the man that has consumed her every thought and dream since the day they met. Will Gavin take her back? And if so, will their reunion be a collision of two hearts destined to complete one another and rekindle a love that knew no boundaries? Or will scars from their past rip open, tearing slowly at what each of them was meant to be? Can fate, the ultimate game changer, mend the shattered road it laid out from the start?
Only time will tell…
My Review
You know those books? The ones that get under your skin… The ones that seem to make your ability to breathe difficult… Those with the power to squeeze, stop, shatter and fill your heart to the brim all in the span of a few chapters? Well, this is one of them.
Mr. Tall Dark and Fuckable Handsome is back. And oh. my. word… the things he does. He makes your heart hurt, he makes you swoon in epic proportions and he melts your panties right off in this book. Wow.
"He was gone. Her Yankees-loving, bottle-cap giving, dimpled smile other half was gone, and there wasn't anything she wouldn't do to turn back time."
When I finished Collide I was utterly broken. Shattered. To. Pieces. And after just the first page of Pulse, I was totally and completely in it all over again. Heart clenched. Bated breath. Torn at what was happening, or rather, not happening, with Emily and Gavin. I was so impressed with the amount of feeling Gail McHugh evoked so immediately, every word chosen for maximum impact. I kept repeating to myself, almost cathartically… they belong together. Soul mates. True loves. They had already gone through so much, I needed them to be together. A more determined Emily finally goes after what she wants, seeking Gavin to make things right. It's not easy. It's not pretty. Rather, it's gut-wrenching to read.
"Regret in the most brutal form tightened like an unforgiving noose around her neck"
But when they're together, they're magnetic. Their chemistry is scorching, the undeniable pull between them palpable. Destined. To. Be. Their road to happiness, however, is paved with mistakes they need to forgive and insecurities they need to overcome. Particularly Emily, who struggles with lingering regret and feelings that she's not worth it… that she's irrevocably broken their relationship.
"You breathe life into me, and I love you in more ways than I thought I was capable of loving, but you're more than I feel I deserve."
A large part of this story is Emily's evolution. In Collide, she's a girl that's broken… too fragile to leave an abusive man, too insecure to believe she deserves happiness. In Pulse, her deep regret is fueling determination and a more confident Emily begins to emerge. I don't think this is a story where by the end of it, she's completely "fixed", but with Gavin's love, she begins to heal. I loved seeing that part of Gavin… the part that loved her so much that he refused to let her think badly of herself. Her self-deprecating words cut him to the core and he was there to fill her heart and her mind with everything she meant to him.
"I can't believe he fucking hurt you, baby.. I'll only ever worship these lips. I'll only ever worship this body… When I look at you, I feel like I'm looking at the other half of myself. You've filled the empty space in my soul, and because of that, you're a Goddess to me. That's the way I'm always going to treat you. For the rest of your life. I promise you that. I fucking promise."
And if you think the first book was hot, GET READY… the pages ignite with passion, desire and need. They cannot keep their hands off each other and well, truth be told, I couldn't be happier!
"No… I'm not fucking you tonight, Emily Cooper. Kill me if you want, but I'm going to slowly possess you until you can't take it anymore. My fingers are going to trace every beautiful hidden line on your body. My lips are goign to caress, nourish, and feed every unsated inch of you."
You're probably asking by this point… Well, what actually happens?!
And I'm not going to tell you. I don't want to disclose a single thing about this book because Gail McHugh throws in various plot twists that made my heart race, that filled me with uncertainty over what would happen and that had me hating Dillon with every. fiber. of. my. being. HATE.
She completely shattered me. Broke me. Had me in there's-no-way-this-can-happen tears. I wanted to rock back-and-forth in a corner and cry.
One thing is for certain, though. Gavin Blake is one of my favorite all-time, swoon-worthy book boyfriends… the schmexiest of all! The way he loves Emily is epic.
"You've accepted me with every fragile weakness I have, loving me no less than a woman without faults. A woman without fears. Every look, touch, and kiss you've given without judgement of any kind. You've healed every exposed wound, old scar and piece of pain I brought into this relationship without expecting anything in return. You've shown me what a racing heart feels like, shown me mere thoughts could easily cease with a single kiss. You've shown me what it is to feel truly, wholeheartedly, until the end of time, loved."
At the end of it all, this is a love story. A love story between two people that love hard… whose desire for each other is unquenchable. Gavin and Emily are two magnets forever drawn to each other, because they belong together. I was so happy with the way it ended. It was perfect. Bliss.
"We were written for one another, and I wouldn't change one line our romance novel. The good, the bad, the in between. It's ours. We own it."
***Read a teaser from PULSE***
About The Author
I've always been a lover of writing, but mostly dabbled in creating poetry while raising my three beautiful children.
I am grateful my husband of fifteen years has supported me— albeit sometimes kicking and screaming—as I pursue this "hobby" of mine. Without his help, writing would be an impossible endeavor.
In late June 2012, I felt an urgent tug of my pen, and I began writing one of my first novels, Collide. Although I thought it might never see the light of day, it gave me the courage to plunge headfirst onto a path I had never considered before.
Facebook | Goodreads | Twitter


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Harvested rainwater isn't really great to drink, but if you are without your main water supply for whatever reason, it is feasible to use a survival/camping water filter such as this water filter to filter this water and make it safe for drinking.
If you'd like more information about building a rain water collection system, the folks over at Old World Garden Farms have built a great system and they have written an article about how it was put together and how it works. Check it out below.
Creating A Simple And Inexpensive Rain Water Collection System
For emergency drinking water storage, check out: WaterBOB WB-06-001 Emergency Drinking Water Storage it fits in your bathtub and holds 100 gallons of water.
(Photo from: Old World Garden Farms)


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Legion of #8 (Preview)
in Comic Previews Comment
- Story by
- Paul Levitz
- Art by
- Steve Lightle
- Colors by
- Javier Mena
- Letters by
- Pat Brosseau
- Cover by
- Guy Major and Steve Lightle
- Publisher
- DC Comics
Classic Legion artist Steve Lightle returns, along with recent Legion artist Yildiray Cinar! In a tale illustrated by Lightle, Invisible Kid must chase down a set of thieves who've gotten their hands on some of the most dangerous technology in the universe…tech that could result in a new dawn for an old adversary! And in "Founder's Night," Yildiray Cinar returns for a story of Cosmic Boy, Saturn Girl, and Lightning Lad, the three founding Legionnaires, reunited for a rare night off in 31st-century Istanbul!
Source: ScienceFiction.com


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- Hello everyone,
I'm a totally new in 3d printers.
My babckground is programming and I taught myself solidworks and maya.
Is there any tutorial how to make your 3d printer like what mechanical parts are required maybe some drawings...?
I didn't find much on the main page.
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About Us
The St. Jerome's University archives houses the historical records of the University and those of its founding religious order, the Ontario-Kentucky Province of the Congregation of the Resurrection.
Genealogists, please note that the archives hold the parish registers of St. Agatha Church, St. Agatha, Ontario, from 1834 to 1885. Registers for years after this date are available at the church (519-747-1212).
Please note: Use of the archives is by appointment only.