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Need help, nothing is working!
I'm totally lost. I have been CG for almost a month now and my hair is sooo dry. I feel like it is dryer than before I went CG. It seems like every product I have tried makes it worse. Currently I am co-washing with the Tresemme Naturals conditioner and using AOHR as my rinse out and leave in then using KCCC. I did the aPHogee protein treatment a couple of weeks go and I have been doing deep conditioning treatments multiple times a week but still dry dry dry. Some of the gels and products I have tried so far are LA Looks Sports Gel, EcoStyler Krystal, Herbal Essences Set me up gel and mousse, herbal essences totally twisted mouse. I thought I might be protein sensitive so I cut those out of my routine but it hasn't made a difference. HELP!
The Aubrey Organics has denatured alcohol which is very drying to hair. It also has glycerin which some people have a problem with. The tresseme has aloe in it which acts as protein for some people. I would start with changing those products first.
ETA: The LA looks & ECO gel have protein. The Herbal Essences has denatured alcohol.
Wow thank you! That's super helpful! Any suggestions for a better cowash and rinseout that I can find at Sally's or somewhere local?
I can't really help with brands for you - my hair didn't like any drug store products. I think some of the suave naturals are protein free.
But, look through the product review thread and look through responses to other similar posts to yours. You should be able find something to try next. Just remember to find someone with similar hair properties as you - greater chance their hg products will work well for you, too. Until you figure out your hair's protein needs, you might want to avoid them all -- look into what exactly protein is...the ingredient list doesn't always say "protein".
Good luck!
This happened to me when I used heavy conditioners and KCCC. I also think it might be protein. My guess is your hair is low-ish porosity and isn't absorbing the moisture you're applying because you're not using a shampoo that would open the cuticle. I'd recommend trying a gentle, gentle lowpoo (like Shea Moisture Raw Shea Butter Moisture Retention Shampoo.) Also, gels and KCCC always seemed drying to me. Maybe try a creamier styler(: Creamier gels include Beautiful Curls Gel for Wavy to Curly Hair (found at Whole Foods) and Koils by Nature Herbal Peppermint Gel (found online.) You could also try a curl cream, like Alba Botanica Soft Style Cream. I'm trying it right now and like it. At Sally's, I heard Biotera Curl Cream works well too. Hair One, their knockoff of Wen, could work as a cowash. Good luck!
The low-porosity thing is a good point. If this is the case, use a steam treatment to get your conditioner to absorb well. Look in the protein-sensitive forum at the "DT?" thread...I explain how I do my steam cap. If your hair is low-po, gentle heat is your friend.
You've been layering so many products I would seriously "hit reset" and use a clarifying shampoo to get everything out.
Then I would use a quality conditioner, to be followed up with an ACV rinse to correct any pH balance issue.
I'll take a wild guess and say you might have a problem with one or more of your stylers. You might want to try one at a time to find the culprit/s.
And you don't want to overdo it with conditioning treatments as that causes problems too. So much of hair care is about balance, I've found.
I've definitly never used all of these products on the same day but I think you're right. My hair seemed to be gaining more moisure and doing better and then I used the Herbal Essences product with the KCCC because people have suggested using a gel with it and my hair went crazy. On Saturday when I tried to style it there were all these loose frizzy almost crinkled hairs all of a sudden not only on the top of my head but sticking out of all my curls which is totally new to me. I stopped using the Aubrey Organics and shampooed with a sulphate shampoo yesterday just to get anything bad out of my hair. I didn't follow up with any product just GVP Conditioning balm as a rinse out and leave-in. My hair felt a little better this morning when I woke up but when I tried to wash and style with just the KCCC today I had the same effect. I have no idea what is wrong.
that happened to me when I first started CG. It's all about experimenting. I have 3a/3b hair and I finally found a routine that I semi-iike. Still not 100% satisfied.
Shampoo: Shea Moisture
Conditioner: Say Yes to Carrots
Gel: KCCC
Finisher: CJ Curls in a Bottle
Just bought some BB Flax Seed Gelee cant wait to try!
When it happened to you how did you fix it? Did you need more moisture, more protein?
I had been using the KCCC every day for a little less than a week when it started happening. But isn't KCCC supposed to be really moisturizing and healthy for your hair?
The weather change may also be affecting your moisture needs. My hair hasn't always needed lots of moisture but lately my hair can't get enough!
Other light cowashes are Suave Naturals (just not the coconut) and VO5. KCCC has lots of aloe if your hair doesn't like that.
You could also check out GVP conditioning balm at Sally's or Yes to Cucumbers/Carrots at Target/Wal-Mart.
I, like many other curlies here, have noticed it takes a much longer time than usual for hair with KCCC to dry (and that's can even happen if you're using a conservative amount), suggesting it has a heavy conditioning effect for some of us. That's why I wonder if the KCCC along with the conditioner might be over-conditioning your hair. ... At the same time, KCCC can seem dry sometimes to the touch. Maybe you could try using way less of it, and see if that helps.
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It seems that Possebon got off with only a deep two-inch gash just below his knee -- that's right, up near his knee -- and maybe some knee damage. Lucky boy.
As someone who has been watching, with growing alarm, Pogatetz's career at Middlesbrough (this is his fourth year with the club) I regard it as a miracle that something like this hasn't happened before.
By any standards that take soccer skill as a measure of a player's worth, Pogatetz is a pretty awful player. One of those players who gets described as "never shirking a tackle," or "not a stranger to the physical side of the game" and so euphemistically on.
In plain English, he's a dirty player. He does not belong in a first team of the English Premier League -- which claims to be the world's best league. But there he is, at Middlesbrough -- where he's the captain!
It's not as though the Middlesbrough coach, Gareth Southgate, is unaware of Pogatetz's rough-house play. After the foul on Possebon, Southgate -- trying desperately to find something positive to say about his captain -- gave the whole tawdry game away by whining that the tackle was "an unusual aberration for him -- the last two years he's worked incredibly hard on his disciplinary record."
Two years? For two years Southgate has been nurturing a monster and is now surprised when the monster does something monstrous. Confronted with the evidence, Southgate had to admit that the foul was a bad one, and that referee was correct to red-card Pogatetz.
And what of Pogatetz? I've no doubt that Pogatetz is the sweetest guy in the world, and is kind to children and animals and so on. Much the same sort of guy as is Birmingham City's Martin Taylor who -- having mistimed a tackle and sent Arsenal's Eduardo (another Brazilian, incidentally) to hospital with a horrendously mangled ankle -- was quickly sanctified as a player who would never harm a fly.
Right. Pogatetz has now viewed film of his tackle. He had to do that before making a decision, because he was convinced that the tackle was OK as he "won the ball." But the tape evidence was too strong even for Pogatetz. He's admitted the tackle was a bad one, the referee was right to red-card him, and he says he will speak to Rodrigo by telephone and "I will apologize for hurting him."
How nice. Well, it is nice that Pogatetz is contrite, and that his coach has wished Possebon a speedy recovery (speedier, one hopes than Eduardo who was crippled in March and has still not returned to action). But I wonder: despite all the contrition -- will anything change here?
I'm sure it will not. Players of the Pogatetz type are much admired in England. Their assault-and-battery style is considered an asset. Think no further than the recent case of the unspeakable Joey Barton, guilty of a vicious attack on a teammate during a training session, but welcomed back by Newcastle's then coach, the much-admired Kevin Keegan.
ManU coach Alex Ferguson was justifiably incensed by Pogatetz's violent assault on Possebon. But this is the same Ferguson who managed to ignore for years the violence of his captain, Roy Keane who is still the only player that I know of who has publicly admitted, boasted really, that he deliberately set out to hurt a player -- his infamous 2001 tackle on Alf-Inge Haaland.
Southgate's attitude to Pogatetz smacks of crocodile tears. Two years ago, Southgate outspokenly criticized ManU's Ronaldo, accusing him of being a cheat -- specifically for "diving" to get a penalty by which ManU beat Middlesbrough. His attack on Ronaldo was quickly followed by these words from Dutch player George Boateng, who -- all in a friendly spirit, of course -- advised Ronaldo to cut out his fancy trickery before someone "really hurt him." And who was Boateng? Why, at the time he was the Middlesbrough captain. He was succeeded by Pogatetz. And Boateng, just like Pogatetz, is a totally ordinary -- but over-physical -- player.
Southgate -- of course -- reprimanded Boateng, just as he has said he will discipline Pogatetz. The betting here is that any punishment Southgate inflicts will be nugatory.
The impression left is that the English game remains more interested in shielding the thugs than in protecting the skillful players.


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Volvo 20 Tonne Crane Truck 12m Reach Hire
- Title
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- Condition
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Struggling to avoid even worse damage from its debt crisis, Greece was granted another EU bailout Tuesday, a $172 billion package aimed at helping the country avoid default. Richard Edgar of Independent Television News reports on the eurozone finance ministers' decision amid longer-term anxieties. Continue reading
European Union finance ministers said Thursday Greece would have to make even more austerity cuts to receive bailout money, even if there is a new government. Margaret Warner reports from Germany on how citizens of the continent's richest country feel about the EU's latest debt relief package for Greece. Continue reading
As European Union member states attempt to tackle their financial woes with a fiscal discipline deal, Gwen Ifill discusses the details with Margaret Warner, reporting from Stuttgart, Germany. Continue reading
Margaret Warner speaks with Jeffrey Brown from the European Union summit in Brussels, where there's a new emphasis on the need for growth, not just austerity measures, to keep the continent from facing another recession. Continue reading
In a time of scarce resources, plans to cut deficits and reduce spending can develop into campaign issues. Judy Woodruff and Tom Edsall, a longtime Washington Post reporter who's now a New York Times columnist and journalism professor, discuss how austerity could shape and define American politics this election year and beyond. Continue reading
Markets dropped Tuesday when Greece's leaders called for a referendum to the massive bailout package that emerged from an emergency summit last week. Jeffrey Brown reports. Continue reading
World markets were shaken Tuesday by new fears that the European debt deal might come unglued. Jeffrey Brown discusses the move with a reporter in Athens and a market analyst. Continue reading
The Greek Parliament is set to vote Tuesday on a key part of a new austerity package that would include a new property tax paid through electricity bills. Jeffrey Brown discusses efforts to keep the nation from defaulting with freelance reporter John Psaropoulos in Athens. Continue reading
In other news Wednesday, the Federal Reserve said the U.S. economy faces "significant downside risks" and will try some new measures to push down interest rates for home and business loans. Meanwhile, Greek authorities announced more austerity measures that include cutting monthly pensions and suspending more civil servants. Continue reading
In other news Friday, Italy's parliament gave final approval to a new set of austerity measures, two high-level resignations occurred in the Murdoch media empire and hundreds of thousands of protesters gathered in Syria in the largest rallies since the uprisings began. Continue reading


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Reviews of Nxamaseri Lodge
They do not necessarily represent the views of Expert Africa.
Nxamaseri Lodge review
Perhaps the most beautiful location we stayed in during our three week trip. The papyrus, waterlillies and reedshas not been based by massess or tourists as in other places we stayed.
Adam was a great guide for our boat trips.
The only suggestion I would make, would be for a small box with some childrens books or toys eg snakes and ladders would go a long way, expecially as there is no pool etc.
Nxamaseri Lodge review
Fantastic location on an island in the Okavango panhandle. The trip from the tar road to the camp is even scenic and interesting.
We liked having a personal guide (Phoraki Ngoro "Mr. P") for the 3 days we spent here. If you missed a photo from the right angle with the right lighting (eagle plucking up a fish, for example), he will ensure that you get a second chance at the shot, including finding another fish! Great guide!
No big animals here, but plenty of birds, crocs and fish.
Communal dining makes it easy to talk to other guests, however the lodge owner does not live on site, so you have to interact with managers who tend to have a "commercial" attitude. The day trip to the Tsodilo hills was expensive and disappointing: the rock paintings are not as good as in e.g. Namibia, the bushman village is a disaster and the drive takes forever.
Nxamaseri is still an excellent place to get a feel for the Okavango delta while easily accessible by car.
We were very fortunate to meet and speak with Brad Bestling whose family retook ownership of the lodge. He is a diver and at the time was working with a film crew. A three-year research is underway studying crocodiles; it was a wonderful experience to hear tidbits about the work. You can watch a video about the research online: "Sixty Minutes: Deadly Encounter
Monday, July 16, 2012; interviewer: Liz Hayes"
Nxamaseri lodge - relax and enjoy!!
This is a fantastic place to stay. We were made to feel welcome and were looked after from the first minute to the last. We saw numerous birds (all identified for us), hippos, crocodiles and a variety of plants (with explanations of their use); we learnt to fish and gained a brief insight into the life style of people on the delta. The guide was brilliant. The mokoro trip was a fantastic experience, one of the highlights of our holiday, culminating in a close encounter with a family of hippos.
The hosts were great, the food was good, all the staff were friendly and helpful. Our nut allergy was responded to by taking nuts off the menu during our stay - much appreciated.
The rooms had enough space both inside and on the decking outside and a view different enough from the common area to provide a choice.
A great location with plenty to see and to do. Strongly recommended. This is an excellent place to explore the wide open space in and to experience the emptiness of the delta.
One small detail - the totem pole is not what you might expect if you've seen one in North America and the distance from the town to the south was not quite what the instructions said. We found the guide as much by chance.
Nxamaseri Lodge is a very special lodge.
The location in the Okavanga delta is special. Great place to go fishing for tiger fish and bream. We had a few good catches.
The presence of an inernational camera crew with Bratt and his wife, who specialised in diving with crockodiles was very interesting. Good discussions over dinner and around the camp fire.
Great time at Nxamaseri
We met our guide at the main road as arranged and he was spot on time wise. As we had 4x4 we followed him to the river and left our car there. The trip then by boat to the lodge was amazing and to come round a bend in the river and see the lodge overlooking the river was super.
The management Justine and Chris (relief) could not do enough for us. We could go out on the river when we wanted. The atmosphere was friendly and very helpful and we felt relaxed and comfortable. The guiding was very good and knowledgeable. On leaving we were given packed lunches for which they refused to charge us.
A definite place to return.
Nxamaseri Lodge review
Although a range of activities are advertised, this really is a fishing lodge.
Having said that, Dave's venture into fishing was very successful; Mrs. V felt a bit isolated as she was the only woman there apart from staff. Staff very friendly and hospitable.
Nxamaseri Lodge review
We arrived this place with high expectations, but the manager was not a very friendlly person, and he was both rude and arrogant. However, the fishing and the boat trips were great. We had a great guide named Small, and thanks to him we had two nice days in the panhandle.
If you want to come here you must know beforehand what to do, as the management is not very helpful in suggesting what to see or do. Obviously fishing and birdwatching are the attractions.
Expert Africa comments
Although these travellers enjoyed two nice days here, we were disturbed by any thought of a 'rude' or 'unfriendly' manager. Hence, we asked these travellers for more details, and shared these with one of the lodges' owner, Justine.
She looked, point-by-point into these issues. She has assured us that this impression stemmed from misunderstandings and some lack of clarity in the manager's comments, rather than any intentional rudeness or unfriendliness. She has apologised profusely to these travellers.
The lodge team have taken steps to learn lessons from these comments, and Justine assures us that the same mistakes won't occur again. From the thoroughness of her investigations and comments, we've great faith that this is the case – and retain our confidence in the lodge as a good place for our travellers to visit.
Nxamaseri Lodge review
There were indications of some complacency at the more senior level of management in the camp.
That said, everything else about this site and the associated activities were excellent. We enjoyed superb wildlife sightings and thoroughly enjoyed fishing for Tiger Fish with our guide Adam who was superb at his job and very knowledgable about the fauna.
Nxamaseri Lodge review
Fanrtastic arrival by 4WD & boat (no other way!) at a perfect location and we had the lodge to ourself! Very sociable hosts who joined us in conversation into the early hours!
Excellent activities - especially if you're into fishing & bird life - our guide ('Small') was first class & knew where to find the wild life both from the boat & the mokoro. There's not much larger wildlife apart from crocs & the hippos we could hear close by but could not see!
Overall Nxamaseri provides a very enjoyable, relaxing & interesting contrast with other lodges.
Nxamaseri Lodge review
The start of the Nxamaseri experience was very promising given the magical location of the lodge. From that point onwards it turned into a progressive disappointment.
The welcome was mediocre and the first 20 minutes spent on signing liability waivers. Management does not appear motivated and overall service levels were poor. The rooms did not resemble the room used in their advertisement. The only bright light of the stay was Adam the guide. Overall very poor value for money


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Manchester United expect to be forced to wait until the summer to challenge Chelsea for the signature of Southampton's Luke Shaw, with time now running against them in the last five days of the transfer window.
United are yet to lodge a bid for the 18-year-old left-back and though a move is possible this week, the Premier League champions will need to outbid the west London side substantially if they are to secure the player's services.
Shaw, a Chelsea fan who played at the club's development centre, is expected to be more open to a move to Stamford Bridge, though United have shown in spending a club record £37m on Juan Mata that they will invest heavily.
It is thought Southampton may also feel the need to show commitment to manager Mauricio Pochettino by not selling Shaw, only two weeks after the departure of executive chairman Nicola Cortese.
Juan Mata, who will be formally presented as a United player today, could take the iconic No 7 jersey, which has been unused since Antonio Valencia gave it up at the start of the season. The jersey, once worn by Eric Cantona, is more likely to be taken by Mata than the No 9, which is the other prominent number presently untaken.
United, who are not looking to buy Newcastle United's Yohan Cabaye, avoided any direct contact with Chelsea while concluding the Mata signing, to prevent the selling club attempting to draw them into negotiations over Wayne Rooney.
Instead, the deal was completed with the Mata camp – comprising the player's father Juan Snr, the British lawyer Colin Pomford and a solicitor – negotiating the agreement that the player could leave for €45m (£37m), while United had no direct involvement with Chelsea at all.
Mata's advisors secured an agreement with Chelsea around the start of the season that he could leave the club for €45m if the Spaniard remained outside of manager Jose Mourinho's plans.
Initially, Chelsea stipulated that the agreement must exclude United. Then Mata's camp secured a verbal agreement that a move to Old Trafford could take place. But United only secured a formal agreement that he could leave to join them on Friday night, after Mourinho's press conference in which he bid farewell to the player and explained the club's reasons for selling him.
Rooney has been briefed on the club's ambitions for the next few years and so far looks willing to commit his future to a new five-year deal, worth around £15m a year.
Discussions to that effect are already under way between the club chief executive Ed Woodward and Rooney's agent Paul Stretford, though a deal is not close.
Five pivotal Manchester United signings
Five pivotal Manchester United signings
1/5 Tommy Taylor (signed March 1953 from Barnsley - fee £29,999)
Matt Busby did not want to burden Taylor with the tag of becoming the first £30,000 player, hence the unusual fee. The Yorkshireman proved well worth the expense though. Overall, he scored 131 goals in 191 appearances, playing inspirational roles in the title triumphs of 1956 and 1957. Tragically killed at Munich. Number 14 on United's all-time scoring chart. First Division titles - 2.
2/5 Denis Law (signed July 1962 from Torino - £115,000)
Law was a key figure in Busby's rebuilding post-Munich. Famously in hospital when United won the European Cup in 1968 recovering from knee surgery, Law nevertheless did as much as anyone to both win the title that allowed entry into the competition, and guide United towards the Holy Grail. Second only to Sir Bobby Charlton in the goalscoring list, Law's 237 came in an incredible 404 games, including 18 hat-tricks. First Division - 2. FA Cup - 1.
3/5 Eric Cantona (signed November 1992 from Leeds - £1.2 million)
Eric Cantona (signed November 1992 from Leeds - £1.2 million) The inspirational arrival that sparked the end of United's 26-year wait for the championship. Signed on a whim by Ferguson in a call when Leeds were registering their interest in Denis Irwin, Cantona set the standards off the field and brought a touch of genius on it. His tally of 82 goals in 185 appearances does scant justice to his overall contribution. Premier Leagues - 4. FA Cups - 2
4/5 Cristiano Ronaldo (signed August 2003 from Sporting Lisbon - £12.24million)
Ferguson signed Ronaldo following the then 17-year-old's stunning performance against United in a pre-season friendly. Although he took a little time to fulfil his potential, Ronaldo was a central component in three successive titles, scoring 42 times in the season which saw United crowned Champions League winners once more. Crowned world player of the year in 2008, Ronaldo was sold to Real Madrid for £80million a year later where he has gone on to get even better still. Premier Leagues - 3. FA Cups - 1.
5/5 Robin van Persie (Signed, August 2012 from Arsenal - £24million)
It seemed the Red Devils were on the slide after losing their title on goal difference to Manchester City. Midfield looked to be the area that needed strengthening. Instead Ferguson reinforced his attack. Van Persie proved to be another masterstroke. A glut of 18 goals in 26 games included efforts in wins against Chelsea, Arsenal and Liverpool, twice. Without him United would not have won the title last season. Premier League - 1.


text: Ok, so I may be moving back to cali against my will for a couple years. My question is, I have a couple guns not on the DOJ roster list. From my limited research it looks like it's ok if I bring them in to cali as long as I have 10 rd magazines. Can anyone confirm this? Thanks


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Hello everyone, I get one of my Grandfather's guns out of his collection for my 21st. I don't for the life of me know what to pick. This'll be something I keep with me, for personal protection, not necessarily as a collector's item. I just want to know which of these guns is the most valuable, best overall firearm. Thanks!
Colt, Gold Cup Mk IV, 45
S & W, Model 27-2, .357 mag
S & W, Model 25-2, 45
S & W, Model 18-3, 22 LR
Browning, 9mm
Ruger, Mark I, 22 LR
Colt, Mk IV Series 80 Combat Commander, 45 Auto
Beretta, Mod 92FS, 9mm
Ruger, Blackhawk, 45
Beretta, Model 20, 25


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Brookville, NY, USA < change city >
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Hicksville Wedding In April
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Valerie and Thomson's Wedding
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Elsie and Hemant's Wedding
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Who We Are
Rightware® is the leading provider of HMI software and technology that enable branded user experience in connected cars. Our Kanzi product family is used by leading automotive manufacturers and Tier 1s for HMI development and powering tomorrow's digital instrument clusters, infotainment (IVI) systems, HUDs and more.
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Oil pastel drawing by South African artist Christo Wolmarans
This drawing is very characteristic of the chiaroscuro style when Christo Wolmarans works in oil pastels - where he has now carved his niche. In his quest for instant gratification, the negative space of the dark ground completes the picture for the viewer. With his loose expressive style in line work, a fresh realism is optically created.
Collectors Item: Created in 2012 in oil pastel, measures 420 x 297 m on 200 gsm black paper
Payment EFT into bank account please within 3 days.
Shipping: Protected within Domestic Parcel flatÂ


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Dreaming of a romantic getaway? What about the chance to win the beachside honeymoon of your dreams? Look no further than Miami and the beaches!
June is Romance month in Miami, and back by popular demand are exclusive promotions and deals for a fun and sexy summer.
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Toccoa-Stephens Co. YMCA Closing At End of Month
The Toccoa-Stephens CountyYMCA will close at the end of the month.
The YMCA Board of Directors announced that decision Tuesday.
According to an announcement from the Y, the organization will close for good on October 31.
Toccoa-Stephens County YMCA CEO Robin Dake said that the decision by the board is a financial one.
"The YMCA depends on community support to run our programs," said Dake. "In light of economic situations, we found it increasingly difficult to raise the money we need to maintain a quality program."
Dake said it was a difficult decision that came after much thought and debate.
"We do not want to be in a position where we cannot meet our financial obligations and so we are going to do this (close) before we reach that point," said Dake.
Dake did say that the YMCA, located on Big A Road in Toccoa, will remain open for use until the 31st.
"Members will have their privileges all the way through the 31st," said Dake. "If a member has paid in advance either through this month or beyond that, they have two choices. They can either choose to donate that additional portion to help us wrap things up, or if they want a refund, they can just come to the Y and fill out a form and we will process that refund for them."
According to Dake, after the 31st, the YMCA will begin to liquidate its equipment and other assets at the facility.
She said the decision to close is not a temporary measure.
"The National YMCA will dissolve our charter and we will dissolve as a 501(c)3, so if anybody wanted to restart that, they would have to start the whole process again," said Dake.
Dake added that the YMCA appreciates all of the support that it has received from the community over the last 18 years.
"We have gotten tremendous support and dedication from our board members, our volunteers, and our staff," said Dake. "We feel like we have done some really good work in Toccoa and Stephens County and we will deeply, deeply miss being a part of this community."
The Y has employed four full-time individuals, as well as 20 to 25 part-time individuals, positions that will be lost due to the closure.


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Yeah, there are spoilers.
I suppose it's the stuff of forensics and other fields, and even though I rarely have a murderer telling me his problems, I do hear a kid say, on occasion, "I want to kill someone."
Or it can get specific. "I want to kill so and so."
This is never a good moment, hearing this, because you have to decide who to call, and among the calls is the one that warns the potential victim. That's the law. There are very few situations in which a mental health professional has to break confidentiality, but this is one of them.
So last night, about 8:00 pm, we're eating dinner. I watch as FD reads the paper, fork to mouth, and in another country, the other eater, a biological offspring, is staring at a computer screen, searching for error in his code, reading and rereading hundreds and hundreds of lines of code. He's feeling a little homicidal himself.
I don't feel much like sitting, and as luck would have it, Desperate Housewives is about to begin. I like the show, mainly because I like some of the actors, and I like that the women, the wives, are forced to make quick decisions that will affect just about everything important in family life. And I like that when the story ends, somebody's trying to do something nice for somebody else.
There's always at least one really creepy, dangerous person on the show, which helps me raise my anxiety threshold. I'm reading a slasher novel, too, just to do that.
Anyway, the cringe, the tension in Desperate Housewives is generally well-done, not gratuitous, and the plot keeps my interest, even if I hate some of the story lines. But there are some that I hate to hate. Like last week a teen is working a counter (we like him), pouring a latte. The customer is old enough to be his father. Actually, the guy really is his father, but the son doesn't know this. Mother has made sure to hide this information, ran away with him as an infant, assumed a new identity. She knows bio-dad is a dangerous man.
Bio-dad is befriending his bio-son in the coffee shop, confides the story line of his novel in progress. Now he asks the b0y, "So what should I have him (the spurned father in the novel) do for revenge, now that he's caught up with them? Now that he's found the woman who stole his child, what should he do?"
The kid thinks. It's a long pause.
"To get to the mother," he suggests, "I'd have him get to the kid. Get to her through the son."
"That's what I'm thinking," his father replies.
Cringe stuff. Anyway, this week we get a new plot, a completely new set of characters, one that is going to tie up many of the unsolved, ongoing mysteries on the show. "Epiphany" takes us through the life of a little boy, Eddie, whose father has left him at the age of four. His mother is a verbally abusive woman, addicted to alcohol.
No matter what Eddie does, no matter what he thinks or says, she's contemptuous and ridiculing. Having Eddie has ruined her life. She laughs at him, smirks at him, belittles him. It's so well-done, so real, what we see. And even if it is television, we know it's a fine enactment of exactly what does happen in emotionally, verbally abusive homes. We don't call these homes toxic for nothing.
Eddie searches for nurturing people, and on Wisteria Lane there's no shortage of these. But he makes the mistake of taking the relationships too seriously, thinking older women might really like him, or might like him for their daughters.
And when he risks intimacy, when he tells a female, any female, about his feelings for her, she inevitably laughs, too. Like his mom. Nobody takes him seriously. He just needs someone to love him. You think this is trite? I wish it were.
And wouldn't you know? He's had some very serious anger problems for a long, long, time. He's a good kid, just can't manage his anger very well. And yeah, he's the killer in the neighborhood. One of them.
All I can say is, I liked it, and if I were on the jury, I'd go with the insanity defense. For some reason, my guess is, they'll never pick me for one of these.
Here's the summary from the ABC website, but if you have time, watch the whole show:
We meet Eddie's mom Barbara, a mean, slovenly drunk. She raids his room, looking for a bottle of Scotch, but instead finds his scrapbook with the clippings about the Fairview murders.
We flashback to when Eddie was just four, and his father left his mother -- after loudly proclaiming that he'd never wanted any of this, including Eddie. Mary Alice tries to befriend her, but Barbara isn't interested. Mary Alice stops by one day to give Eddie a teddy bear and finds him home alone while his mom is out drinking. She lectures Barbara about not putting her needs ahead of her son, but the lesson clearly doesn't take.
Gaby first meets Eddie when she moves to Wisteria Lane and finds a lonely Eddie inside her empty house -- he'd been sneaking in to play there since the previous owners moved out. He ends up coming over every day because Barbara has a new boyfriend. When he surprises Carlos and Gaby in the tub, Carlos orders Gaby to "cut him loose" and start making friends with other women, not nine-year-old boys. Gaby wants to go talk to Barbara, but Carlos advises her, "We don't want to be known as the nosy neighbors." After Gaby tells him they can't be friends anymore, Eddie grabs a BB gun and shoots a bird.


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|Large Families - St Richard's Corner Click here to visit this social group
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Answering More Difficult Questions...
I was wondering what you guys do when dealing with more "difficult" questions... We were at a party last night for someone from dh's family. I probably knew 5-10% of the people max, and last time I saw many of those I was pregnant with #3. I got introduced to many of them and since I have a big belly right now people knew I was pregnant and small talk was always pretty much asking me how far along I was, etc and what number this baby was... when I would answer #4 everyone always made big deal "Oh my goodness!" "How many more?.... are you ever going to stop?" the usual, I can deal with those, light humor, smile, let them know we love our kids and are happy to have them, etc.... Anyways, one person said: "Well obviously (dh's name) you have a great job to be expecting another one, what do you do?" and someone else (family member) kind of asked us indirectly how we could be having more kids with the economy and job instability as it is, that he worries for his son and his son's family, and that our family probably worries for us, etc etc. Now this person knows a little more about dh's job... and like many other people our job stability now isn't the best, but its actually the nature of dh's job, and we have had several blows along the way anyways, and God has aaaalways provided well for us. This person was not at all religious, etc, so it was hard to explain we trust in God, but that is a biggy behind why we are open to more kids. What do you do when you get questions that are like that? Questions that can only be answered by the fact that we are trusting in God, etc, but that the person will probably think we are being irresponsible religious fanatics if we tell them.... Do you answer that way anyways? I know I said something along the lines that we can't live in fear etc and later something that things work out, but I wasn't sure what else to say. I have also gotten comments about giving kids attention from parents, and how it probably harder to do if we have many more kids. That is another one that is harder for me to answer, because although I do know that love will be abundant, and I can see it in my kids right now, the love of the siblings etc, and I can also see how they get attention from each other, playing in ways I could never play with them as an adult, etc, and I know large families are a blessing, and if we are blessed with one I know it will be what is best for the whole family, but I still wonder how Iwill be a good enough mother for many, knowing it is probably easier to only worry about one or 2, rather than many kiddos. Once again, I do know it is what would be best for my family, if it was the size God decided to send us, but I wonder how to convey the message when asked questions related to that area, an area where we are trusting in God too. Ever since we had baby #1 I have always tried to be very careful with everything I say and do because I have definitely observed that the more kids you have, the more scrutiny that people look at you with, ang just in case we were going to be blessed with more, I wanted to be extra careful. Aaanyways, sorry for the long post, just wanted your thoughts on the subject . Thanks!
Life is Beautiful!!!
Re: Answering More Difficult Questions...
Oh to live our Faith in this world is so hard. My response since our third is always: "Oh we are open to as many blessings as God will let us borrow from Him." I have found that answer will either make people think or make them be quiet. Because honestly it is none of their business.
If they start on about being able to afford them. I will say something to like whenever God sends us another, blessings come from all around.
Even if the person is not religious, always speak the truth. You never know when you will plant a seed that will take root.
Married to a career firefighter for 22 years
Mom to 10 wonderful blessing, 9 here on earth and one waiting for us in heaven.
DD 17, DD 15, DS 10, DD 9, DD 9,DS 9, DD 2, DD 2, and DD 2
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Hi my beloved reader! Thank you for visiting my weblog. This is the new website I'm going to build and make it feel so lovely than you don't want to go to other place anymore… Whatever I could share here hopefully can give you a simple guide by travelling to Asian countries.
My first trip would be going to Malaysia. I've done enough due diligence before I step my foot in that country. In my next post, I going to share my experienced in Malaysia… actually I've documented my Malaysia visit already but I just don't have enough time to sit down and write for it…. I promise would give you a good read on it. Cheers~~!


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Reducing printing and copying costs
CIO/OFT is implementing steps to reducing spending on paper, print supplies, maintenance and purchases of printing equipment. These steps include configuring all network printers to default to duplex printing, electronic transmission of documents to the maximum extent possible, minimizing the provision of printed material at meetings, presentations, etc. We are soliciting employee ideas to further reduce costs associated with printing and copying.


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Happy Birthday to the lovely KurlyKae!!!!
Have a beautiful day!
Happy birthday, KK! Have a great one!
Happy birthday! :blob2:
Happy Birthday, KK!
I hope you have a great year!
Woo-hoo!!! Happy birthday, KK!!!
Happy Birthday, KK!!
Happy Birthday!:occasion4:
Happy Birthday!!! May your birthday wishes come true!
happy birthday Miss K!!!
Happy Birthday KurlyK
Happy Birthday!!!!
KK, Happy Birthday!!!!!!!!!!!! (you must be out doing fun birthday stuff)
:occasion6::blob4::toothy4::headbang::notworthy::c yclopsani::iconbiggrin::toothy7::icescream::occasi on9::laughing6::glasses7::wave:
happy birthday!!!
Awww, thank you all! I feel like I've made it on NC, having my own birthday thread! :laughing4:
Let's see: I woke to birthday greetings from Hunter (cat) and Heidi (dog) then actual greetings from DD2 and DH. DH slipped a card with $$$ into my bag, which I found later. I worked my usual half day shift, but turned down the opportunity to sub. Who wants that on her birthday?? We had cookies and the kids sang to me to celebrate. They made me a card, too, which will go proudly on my mantel.
After school, DD1 greeted me with another card and two packs of Ghirardelli chocolates. She was so cute: "I remembered which ones you like, these are the kinds you bought as Christmas." She is right, and I have no intention of sharing the Dark & Sea Salt Caramel, but may be willing to share the Dark & Raspberry.
In the afternoon, I took that birthday $$ and went shopping. I want to buy a nice wine rack, (and of course, fill it 8-)) but am having a tough time finding what I like. I've been online, to Bed, Bath & Beyond, Pottery Barn and World Market, but no go, yet. I'm open to ideas. I did get some deals at BB&B, including a pair of lamps for the living room for $10 each. Love those BB&B coupons.
Tonight, we went to Irish pub for dinner. Fun, good food and the birthday girl/boy's dinner is free! We learned that when the people at the next table asked for it, so I made a new friend, with the same birthday as me :laughing4:
Then, back at home, DH lead the chorus for Happy Birthday with a candle in a cannoli. (you can take the girl out of Jersey...) Not sure why he was the lead, when our children can actually carry a tune, but who cares? He had cannoli!
KK!! I absolutely ADORE reading about your birthday day!!! :mrgreen:
Sounds like a wonderful day.
LOL'ing at the cannoli story. :lol:
Happy Birthday, KK!!!
:) I forgot to add: it was 82 degrees here today. As someone who was born in Brooklyn and raised in NJ, my birthdays were always cold, often with rain, but almost never with snow (as in: snow day, no school!) 82 degrees on my birthday is amazing!
Happy Birthday!!!
Happy Birthday KurlyKae, glad you had such a good day :occasion4:
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Harald Hardrada: The Last Viking (edition 2011)
by Michael Burr
Work details
Harald Hardrada: The Last Viking by Michael Burr
No current Talk conversations about this book.
While the book was slow to start, I found it interesting and enjoyed reading about a time not usually discussed in books outside of textbooks. After I got through the prologue, which was slow and clunky, I found that the book flew and found myself lost in the story and characters. I noticed a few minor editing errors, which annoyed me, but, other than that, I really enjoyed this book!
Between Linguistics and early British Literature this past semester, I got a crash course in the beginnings of the English language. I watched YouTube movies, listened to lectures, experienced Old English (and read some of it out loud!), and got to read (for the first time) Beowulf and discuss it. So some of what I was reading and expecting to read in Harald Hadrada did not come as a surprise.
What did come as a surprise was just how violently I reacted to the initial part of the story. It was just so.. graphic and horrifying. I know that's how things were, how the "Spoils of war" were treated, but reading it put down there on the page just really made it hit home to me.
So, needless to say, I was on the side of the "Scraeling" throughout the entire story.
Harald Hardrada is based on the true story of Harald, the "last" Viking. It chronicles his life through the eyes of his young squire, the "Scraeling", a boy picked up after a raid on a convent that leaves the nuns raped and murdered. The boy is crippled, due to a break in his hip and it being set wrong, but has incredibly high intelligence and does much for Harald's campaigns and his victories. But it's all for a purpose.
This book was dense with history, facts and battles. It read like watching a chess game between two matches is like. I really had to keep my mind focused on each detail in order to fully grasp what was happening and see the effects of those actions coming. I found it to be intellectually stimulating, engaging, and it has since been the topic of not a few conversations with friends.
I found the historical aspect of this book quite fascinating, as I know little of the Viking period. I'd heard of their reputations of ruthlessness and skilled warriors, and this certainly did not lack any of those episodes. The story is told through the eyes of The Scraeling. His voice is the first we hear, and his declaration in the prologue that really hooked me into the story. The reader is quickly inserted into the account of how The Scraeling came to be serving Harald Hardrada, in the account of the viking's violent pillaging of the convent where he lived. The episode is described in detail, and for any who find it hard reading violent episodes, including rape, will likely have difficulties getting past the story of how The Scraeling came to be a trusted secretary. However, this was one of the most, if not the most violent episode depicted in the novel, so if you can get through it, you are in for an interesting read. Harald traveled greatly, working as a mercenary for his kin in Kiev and for Empress Zoe of Constantinople. The reader also gets treated to excerpts of the Heimskringla, the famous Norse saga, during the section breaks.
My biggest criticism was the use of some modern sounding slang terms. These are terms in use today, and having them in a story in the time before William the Bastard claimed the English throne to become William the Conqueror made what seemed like a jarring contrast to the more period sounding voice of the rest of the novel. More authentic sounding terms would have maintained the mood better throughout the book. However, I found most of slang seemed to centered around the attack on the convent at the start, and later in Harald's relations with Empress Zoe. Once I realized that most of that sort of language was past, I was left to enjoy Scraeling's schemeings. The story gets told between the first person, where Scraeling is validating or commenting on the events well after they happened, then in the third person depicting the events as it happened. I found this to be effective, and gave the feeling of reading the memoirs of Scraeling.
I found it to be an interesting read, and if not for the language issue, I would have given it a full four stars. I received a copy from the publisher for honest review.
Thank you to Knox Publishing for allowing me to read Harald Hardrada in exchange for an honest review.
Somewhere along the way in my history education, I managed to miss learning about Harald Hardrada, or it's possible I've totally forgotten about him. This novel served to teach me everything I ever want to know about the man, the legend, the Viking.
This is not a history book, it's a fictionalized account of Hardrada's life with interspersed commentary by Ranulf (the Scraeling) who was supposedly kidnapped during the raid on the convent. The narrative switches between the third person, giving factual details of Harald's life along with suppositions from the author, and first person commentaries by the Scraeling. At first, I found the switches rather disconcerting and felt it made the story choppy, but I got used to it. One thing I never got used to or enjoyed was the portents of doom that the Scraeling would interject. He'd say things like Hardrada didn't know this was the last time (insert event here). I don't mind a bit of foretelling in a story, but it was done several times. I'd rather just read what actually happened than be told ahead of time.
Michael Burr, the author, did a great job characterizing Harald and the other Vikings. They were a brutal bunch and Burr didn't pull any punches in his writing. There were fairly graphic rapes and copious bloody battle scenes.
The Scraeling, though a fictional character, was given great depth. He had been taken in by nuns and taught their peaceful ways, but once with Hardrada, he had to learn to be ruthless to survive. His keen intelligence and swift learning of battle tactics made him invaluable to the Viking barbarians.
There was a lot of use of foreign words in different languages throughout the book. This made it difficult for me to keep the story flowing as I read. I'd forget what a particular word meant, or it may not have been translated, so I'd have to re-read some sentences to make sure I understood.
I enjoyed the history lesson I received as I read this book. It didn't feel like a lesson, it was definitely an action-packed novel. Make sure to grab this book to learn about the last Viking king and the end of the Viking Age.
This was one heck of a tale about one hell of a man. Harald Sigurdsson was a brute of a Viking who goes after what he wants with little care for what he ravages along the way. He lived hard and he expected his followers to jump at his command. His story is told in this tale through a man he kidnapped from a nunnery. A crippled son of a local English lord who is cunning and educated and who makes himself useful to Harald but only to find a way to bring him down. He becomes the Scraeling.
This book brings an interesting re-telling of what I have read in past tales of how Harald came to be in England to distract Harold Godwinson from his attention to he who would become William the Conqueror. For that fateful act is the one Harald is most remembered. But he was a warrior for the Rus and for the Empress Zoe of Constantinople. He was basically a man without a country for a bit and he, his battle ax and his band of wanderers would war wherever war was needed. And they showed no mercy.
This book was fascinating. Hard to put down and an utter page turner for me. It flip-flopped between the story of Harald and his band and the Scraeling's memoirs as he moved higher up in Harald's esteem and plots to bring him down. It takes him a while and he wonders if the gods will ever stop smiling on Harald. Will they? History tells the tale of Harald's defeat but this book brings an interesting spin on how it might have happened.
I did find myself missing an author's note at the end. I found myself googling all over to try and place what was real and what was fiction - not to mention who was real. I realize these are not required in historical fiction books but they sure are nice.
Harald's story was harsh but his times were harsh. Although I suspect that he was just a monster. Some of the things he did turned my stomach. It was good he was stopped before he claimed the throne of England. Oy, can you imagine?
References to this work on external resources.
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In the dead of night, a band of Vikings ravage a lonely convent on the Brittany coast?and their fearsome leader makes a decision that will eventually lead to his downfall. Ranulf de Lannion is fifteen years old. Crippled, deformed and abandoned by his family to the charity of the convent, he is seized by the Vikings during a midnight raid. Contemptuously nicknamed 'The Scraeling by his captors, his future appears grim. Harald Sigurdsson, or 'Hardrada' as he will come to be known, is the leader of the Viking band. A violent mercenary with designs on the throne of Norway, Hardrada abducts The Scraeling on a whim. Ranulf grows into an invaluable asset, smoothing Hardrada?s path over their thirty-five years together from mercenary to commander of the Varangian Guard, all the way to king of Norway. But all is not as it seems in the heart of Ranulf de Lannion. Having sworn secret revenge upon Hardrada for the murders at the convent, he vows to end the day of the Viking forever. When the king of Norway launches an attack against the Anglo-Saxon throne of England in 1066, what role will The Scraeling play in bringing the age of the Viking to an end?… (more)
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The Miami Dolphins were 7-9 last year and in many ways resembled the Dolphins of the last decade, a team in the middle of the pack and seemingly going nowhere. Don't bring that up to Dolphin fans this year as expectations are soaring with the development of QB Ryan Tannehill and all the offseason moves. The reality is that there's still lots of work to do for an offense and pass defense that were ranked 27th in the NFL last year.
Key changes
There were no key changes to the coaching staff, which is a good thing. Head coach Joe Philbin made a very favorable impression on me last year in his first year as a head coach as did his coordinators Mike Sherman and Kevin Coyle. Coyle's defense only gave up 18.6 points a game in the six division games. Unfortunately, the Miami offense only scored 18.1 points per division games.
The team decided to move on without the services of LT Jake Long, RB Reggie Bush, TE Anthony Fasano and slot receiver Davone Bess. Only time will tell if the offense benefits from the replacements for these players. Long played hurt last year but still rarely got any help blocking the key pass rusher on opposing teams. Bush, Bess and Fasano accounted for 2,388 yards of offense, 14 touchdowns and 99 first downs.
Roster additions: Wide receiver Mike Wallace was signed in the offseason for a five-year, $60 million deal with $30 million guaranteed. Wallace leads an overhaul of the roster that includes 8-9 new starters for the 2013 season. Seven new members to the roster include Wallace, CB Brent Grimes, linebackers Dannell Ellerbe and Philip Wheeler, offensive tackle Tyson Clabo, tight end Dustin Keller and first-round pick DE Dion Jordan.
Roster departures: Not everyone is convinced that dropping linebackers Karlos Dansby and Kevin Burnett for Ellerbe and Wheeler was that much of an upgrade, but the Dolphins got younger at the linebacker position and in the long run it may have been the right move. Dansby and Burnett were the top two defenders in tackles with 234 combined tackles, 3½ sacks and 14 passes defended. Ellerbe and Wheeler got $27 million guaranteed in their combined $51 million contracts and have a lot to live up to make the departures of Dansby and Burnett look like good football decisions.
Position battles
There will be competition at running back, fullback, the third wide receiver, defensive end and cornerback. RB Lamar Miller will be challenged for playing time by Daniel Thomas and rookie Mike Gillislee. The fullback battle will be between Jorvorskie Lane and Charles Clay. The third wide receiver has to replace Davone Bess' production in the slot with Brandon Giibson, Jeff Fuller, Armon Binns and maybe Marvin McNutt competing all summer. Dion Jordan is penciled in at defensive end but Jared Odrick will not go away quietly and may win the job on the early downs. Richard Marshall is penciled in at corner opposite Brent Grimes, but expect rookie Jamar Taylor to go after the starting spot and push Marshall to the nickel role.
Bubble watch
The Dolphins made the most of their big roster decisions in the offseason, but guys like CB Nolan Carroll, CB Dimitri Patterson, RB Daniel Thomas and maybe guard John Jerry will have to do well this summer or risk losing playing time or worse.
Biggest concern
The expectations are high, especially for quarterback Ryan Tannehill. He only threw 12 touchdown passes last year. I think Tannehill will take the next big step in his development, but will he lead Miami to the playoffs? Secondly, will Brent Grimes return to 100 percent and lead this team to a better pass defense than the 27th ranked pass defense last year. Tom Brady has led the Patriots to six straight wins over the Dolphins with 11 touchdown passes while averaging 283 passing yards a game.
Something to prove
There is a lot of pressure on running back Lamar Miller to replace Reggie Bush. Can Miller get 1,000 yards rushing on 220 carries, scored six touchdowns, catch 38 balls and score two more times because that's what Bush averaged in his two seasons with the Dolphins. Offensive tackle Jonathan Martin is now a permanent fixture on the left side with Jake Long gone and he got mixed reviews last year when he had to go to the left side. Miami tried to re-sign Jake Long, which should tell you they were happy with Martin on the right side. Brian Hartline was moving along nicely in a quiet career until the Dolphins signed him to a five-year, $31 million deal with $12.5 guaranteed this spring. That's a lot of money for a guy with six touchdown receptions in four years.


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Zac Efron Twerks In Drag on 'Tonight Show' (WATCH)
By JACKIE WILLIS
May 07, 2014
Zac Efron makes one handsome pre-teen girl. The 26-year-old heartthrob joined his Neighbors co-star Seth Rogen and Jimmy Fallon on Tuesday's Tonight Show, and all three men were dressed in this season's finest spring dresses.
The guys portrayed pre-teen girls who joined Sara (Fallon) on her show EW! for selfies, frappuccinos and an "EW speed round."
RELATED PICS: Hollywood's Sexiest Shirtless Men
Another memorable moment on the show-within-a-show is when the three begin dancing to DJ Snake and Lil Jon's Turn Down For What, a song Miley Cyrus was just twerking to earlier this week. Efron even shows his twerking skills!
These aren't the first celebrity guests Sara, no "h", has had on her show. Lindsay Lohan, Jon Hamm and First Lady Michelle Obama have also popped in on the EW! show.


text: Rows of metal desks, hard chairs in perfect lines, with kids sitting at attention is what some may think of when they remember back to their elementary school years.That's not what it looks like inside a first grade classroom in Rockport."You have to have two feet on the ground at all times.""You're not allowed to bounce too high""You can't kick 'em, or throw 'em, or dribble 'em"Those are some of the rules students in Mrs. Starrett's first grade class at Camden Rockport Elementary School have for their seats this year, The kids aren't sitting in chairs, they're on exercise balls."Well if I'm doing math and I have too much energy, it's easier to get some of the energy out," said six year old Quinn Riordan.Quinn's teacher Mrs. Jill Starrett said "I think for first grade children they're much more focused and able, much more available to learn sitting on them because they can learn all the time and their core strength, they're sitting up they're focused and they like it.""In chairs, if you're not comfortable, you have to move all around," said first grader Elise Mahar. "But on the balls, if you have to scoot around you can just bounce."So not only are their bodies active, their minds are too, according to the Knox County Let's Go Coordinator, Adrienne Gallant. "This piece really fits into the one hour of physical activity. When you look back, see what the kids are doing, you've got kids bouncing, moving, you've got them shifting their weight constantly engaging their core, when kids are active they learn better, so we sort of get a two-fer, we get the physical activity as well as the increased learning."Last year, the school only had enough balls for some of the kids in Mrs. Starrett's class. Now, all 19 students have them, and she says she'll never go back to hard classroom chairs. "For me as a classroom teacher, I would not be without them now, to do management and organizing a classroom and working for me there is no comparison. I would not be without the balls now, it's just a different, they come in get their balls, they sit down and they start working."Working their way to the answers, one bounce at a time.


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A short sale, or a quick sale, is when you owe more on your home then what it is currently worth, and you cannot afford to pay the mortgage payments anymore. Typically, your only option would be to go into foreclosure, but, if you work with the bank and prove that you can't afford your payments and that you have already tried selling the house for what you owe on it (60 days on the market is standard), they may allow a short sale. If they do allow one, then you lower the price of your home and wait for offers. Then the tricky part is getting the bank to accept an offer, this typically takes about 60 to 90 days, so having multiple offers is good in case one backs out. So, when it's all said and done, the bank gets all the money and they forgive whatever it was you owed over that. If you are insolvent there is no tax issue either, so you walk away clear of any debt, but with a 100 point drop on your credit score.
chinakat and Knittin' in the Shade,
Would it kill either of you to temper your harsh comments with helpful or constructive advice or at least some words of encouragement?
My impression, FWIW, is that she would like to honor her obligation. However, she wouldn't be much of a Mom if she didn't at least think about the cost to her DC in terms of quality of life and longterm savings when you consider the possibility that they could become slaves to this mortgage only to wind up losing the house anyway.
How often do you think her DC would see her parents if they worked as much as it sounds like they'd need to, especially when you factor in commuting. And what kind of shape do you think they'd be in when DC did see them?
My guess is that she is tired, overwhelmed and possibly depressed. It may well have been easier for her to stick her head in the sand and post here after the house was in foreclosure. I suspect both of you would have been more compassionate then and yet in this scenario she is trying to be responsible.
JMO, ~Cath
I honestly don't know anything about foreclosure or bankruptcy, other than the people in our lives that we have seen be extremely irresponsible with their money and then file bankruptcy and then get to keep everything they charged up on their credit cards. They don't seem to have any repercussions at all from doing this, except that they have to rent for about five years. I always wanted to save my credit in the past in order to buy a home, but now I don't care if I have to rent. I wasn't aware of any other repercussions, I wasn't trying to make it look like foreclosure was the best option, I just feel like it is and that obviously came out in my post.
No way. Now that is uncalled for. We have never, ever, in our lives payed a rental or mortgage payment late, nor have we payed a credit card late, nor a utility bill unless it was a total accident, which happens to us mortals. I have a long credit history that I can point to. Anyone who wouldn't look at the whole picture is not worth renting from anyway.
Well, I am sorry for any hurt feelings I have caused by speaking bluntly. The OP did ask for honesty, and that's what I provided, but I should remember that there are real people involved and that sometimes people have no interest in hearing my honest opinions, and that it probably doesn't help anyway.
I speak out of my general frustration with the entire foreclosure fiasco. If this is happening to hundreds of thousands of mortgage holders across the country, I can't see how it's not going to hurt ALL of us. I'm angry with the lenders for allowing this to happen, but I'm also bothered by borrowers that won't take any personal responsibility for getting in over their heads. If people take out an adjustable rate mortgage even though they can't handle an additional $200 in monthly payments, I just can't feel too sorry for them. It's a THIRTY YEAR commitment -- it's hard to imagine anybody thinking interest rates were going to stay so low for that long. Hence my frustration.
I'm sure it's incredibly stressful to personally be in such a bind. I meant no harm to the OP by speaking so bluntly, I was really speaking to the situation in general rather than to the individual at hand, although I'm sure that's not how it came across. I do honestly hope the OP finds a happy way to resolve her situation. I'm just kind of astonished (and really sad) that so many people are in this situation in the first place.
I disagree. My commitment to my children is stronger than my commitment to any bank. I would not go to work full-time in a minimum wage job to avoid forclosure.
Haven't read the whole thread--please forgive if someone has already posted this. Moody's did a recent survey/study that despite what they say, banks have worked w/ less than 1% of the customers now in default/foreclosure. It's a rigged system and they don't care. This is just like the S&L of the 80's--the banks didn't help the customer then either.
IMHO it is not unethical to walk away, it's unethical to promote an ARM. There is no reason why any bank should push an ARM--it's a device to trick the consumer and take their money. I think Congress should and will step in and make ARMs illegal, or at the very least capped. Just my two cents!
Oh, and FWIW we have a fixed, no debt (other than the mortgage) and I totally think no one should get a free ride! I just think the banking system is at fault here.
ETA I read more and saw the OP's plan--that sounds much better for you! Foreclosure isn't a good thing, although sometimes maybe it's the best option. Good luck in whatever you do.
It's easy to say that "the information is out there so you should have found it", but the fact is, I had no idea that there was information that I was supposed to find. When we rented, one of DH's checks went to rent, and the other to everything else. When we bought our townhome, one of Dh's checks went to mortgage and one to everything else. So when we moved here and the mortgage amount came out that one of Dh's checks would go to mortgage and one to everything else, it didn't seem wrong to us or alarming or scary in any way. That is how we had been living life for the 8 years that we were out on our own and it had been going fine. Only recently has that other check of Dh's not been covering all of our other expenses. The crazy thing is that Dh makes more now than ever before (I mean after inflation is accounted for), so I still feel like I have no idea what happened. I still look at the numbers and wonder where I am going wrong and why these aren't adding up anymore.
I'm not saying we didn't make a mistake. We obviously made a very big one. I'm just saying I didn't know any better when we made it. No one told us anything that made us worry about what we were doing. Our realtor, our lender, our parents, our siblings, our friends, none of them said that our mortgage payment had to be only 25% of our take home pay. Everyone we knew was living the same way as we were. We grew up in homes were our parents struggled to make ends meet and spent half of their monthly pay on rent/mortgage too.
So, like I said, I'm glad you've had such great opportunities in life. It sounds like your doing great financially and it also sounds like you are very knowledgable about things that I never even knew that I should know or look for. But, I think there are a lot of people out there like me, and I don't think it is entirely our fault what is happening now.
I love how so many people have the crystal ball of what life may throw them & you have to factor this & you have to factor that. Spare me. You cannot be prepared for any & everything that may come your way. And you can read & read & inform yourself & still get screwed. Depends on where you find the information, who do you believe etc? Not everything is cut & dry. Yes you need personal responsibility & the OP has admitted to that.
We had 3 mortgage brokers lie straight to our faces. Out right LIE. And they both came highly regarded by friends & family who had used them. We could have easily been screwed. They make it look so easy & just blow smoke up your arse.
I am not in your situation OP but I hope you know some of us do realize you looked to someone with the expertise (the mortgage broker/co.) to help you decide if homeownership was something you could afford. They obviously lied to you
Respectfully, hogwash. It's a choice w/ ramifications, like anything else. If the OP were working, who's to say they wouldn't have qualified for XXX more dollars and faced the same scenario now?
I'm happy to be a SAHM and it ain't the life of luxury and our last name isn't Gates. We cut our coat to fit our cloth just like everyone else--we just currently use less cloth.
Sorry to hijack, Jennica--good luck w/ your short sale.
I think people need to remember that we're talking about a disruptive and upsetting event in a person's life, not just a hypothetical situation or a philosophical argument about the state of the economy and so on - and have a little more kindness for the OP, who I imagine has spent a lot of sleepless nights feeling terrible about this.
Being a SAHP is ONLY a luxury item if you will be able to make enough to afford dc, extra transportation costs, extra clothing costs, additional taxes, the price of convenience foods (because I WOH and let me tell ya, all these people that say make everything from scratch absolutely DO NOT work a 40+ hour week and if they do they are probably squeaking by with about 4 hours of sleep a night), and all the other hidden costs of working.
From this website which was linked above;
The bank told us we had to prove that we would have a zero or negative balance at the end of each month, and then they would be able to do a quick sale, forgive our debt, and we would not owe anything on taxes.
I will check with a tax advisor to be sure. How do I find one and how much will they charge me to ask them this question?
By the way, our realtor did not expect to be able to sell our house in the event of a quick sale, he expected that the bank would take over the sale with their own agents. He has even sent us the form to take the house off the market when the time comes. He had no vested interest in advising us to do a quick sale. He will lose money on the deal since he likely wont get to sell the house.
Even if someone tries to encourage you to take out a bigger loan than you can reasonably afford, it's always your choice to say no, and even if someone lies to you (and I'm not at all doubting that that happens, although I'm also guessing it doesn't happen quite as often as is suggested by some here), the paperwork spells out the terms - if what you were told doesn't match the paperwork, then you don't sign it. Period. If you have questions, then you get your own attorney to look it over, someone who DOES have a responsibility to you.
Cristeen ~ Always remembering our warrior ~ Our is 3, how'd that happen?!?!
We welcomed another warrior in May 2012!!
2012 Decluttering challenge - 575/2012
I'm going to assume from your tone that you've never worked in the mortgage industry.
Lying happens by the minute. To the customer, to the client, to the bank. I saw things going on that made me sick. And I got "layed off" twice because I refused to tell those lies. Just because you haven't experienced it doesn't mean it isn't everyday in the industry. Chances are good that you A- did a lot of homework, or B- had a good broker who did what they're supposed to do. You'd be amazed at how few of those there are out there. There's too much money involved in the industry for it to not be corrupt.
|And I don't know what the laws are in your state, but not every state has lawyers involved in the process. And in those states, the process of hiring a lawyer to look over the paperwork is generally not feasible, not practical, and definitely not cheap. I know from 10 years in the business that on average we would get loan paperwork within a few days of closing. That doesn't leave time to question anything. If you decline to sign the paperwork because things aren't as they should be, you'd better hope your seller is sympathetic and willing to extend the contract, or else you're out your deposit, your fees, and your new house (and probably your old one, too). The current RE situation makes me very glad that after the last lay off, I decided to get out of the industry.
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If he joins up to you Peter he will turn gay quick smart, all his problems solved.. my membership just lapsed sorry, what's wrong with me? your the best thing to come my way for ages, I coming back asap, cheers…
Porn is not an addiction. If a person simply watches pon and actually selects which one he/she watches it means that the person knows what she likes.
I didn't watch Eric fucking Diego and Robin because I am addicted or something, I did it because Eric looked damn hot pounding their asses.
You might as well block e-Bay and Amazon because they cause shopaholics to shop, or block MMORPGs because they cause geeks to waste time and fail to develop a social life! Where would it end?
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- 7 Most Effective Exercises - Slideshow
- Take the Exercise and Fitness Quiz!
- Patient Comments: Aerobic Exercise -- Workouts and Routines
- Patient Comments: Aerobic Exercise - Benefits
- Aerobic exercise facts
- What is aerobic exercise?
- How aerobically fit can we be?
- What are the fitness benefits of aerobic exercise?
- What is the difference between aerobic and anaerobic exercise?
- What are the health benefits of aerobic exercise?
- How much aerobic exercise do you need to gain the benefits?
- How do I get started on an aerobic exercise program?
- How do I calculate my target heart rate during aerobic exercise?
- What are some aerobic training workouts and routines?
- What aerobic equipment is involved?
- What are the different types of aerobics classes?
- What resources are available to people interested in aerobics?
How do I get started on an aerobic exercise program?
My suggestion for getting started is almost always the same. Keep it simple, keep it practical, keep it convenient, keep it realistic, keep it specific, and don't try to make up for years of inactivity all at once. Select any activity and amount of time where the probability of sticking with it is high. You may not love walking, but if you can do it right outside your door, and it requires no special equipment, and you already know how to do it (you've been walking your entire life!), then walking might be your best bet for getting started because it's so convenient.
What I mean by "be specific" pertains to setting exercise plans. Planning is helpful for behavior change, and I suggest that you set goals each week. I suggest writing down what day(s) of the week you'll exercise, what time of day, minutes of activity, location, and the activity that you'll do. Be as specific and realistic as possible, and remember that it's not how much you do when you get started but that you simply get started (getting started is usually the hardest part).
A sample plan might look like this:
- Monday: Take a 20-minute brisk walk at 7 a.m. around the block four times.
- Tuesday: Do the same as on Monday.
- Wednesday: Take a 20-minute walk at 6:30 p.m. (right before dinner) around the block.
- Thursday: Take the day off.
- Friday: Take a 20-minute walk at 7 a.m. around the block.
- Saturday: Walk with your family at 10 a.m. for 45 minutes in park.
- Sunday: Bike ride with your spouse for 60 minutes in park at noon. Mom will baby-sit.
Another plan I like is the five-minute out, five-minute back plan. Just like it sounds, you walk for five minutes from your starting point, turn around, and walk back. It's simple and doable for almost everyone. It's a change in your activity behavior even though it's not all that much, and you can increase as you get more used to it. From five minutes you could go to seven and a half out, seven and a half back, a total of 15 minutes just like that. And you can keep your eye on 15 out, 15 back, and there you go meeting the Surgeon General's recommendation of 30 minutes. If you're feeling ambitious, you can add some abdominal crunches and push-ups once you get back. For push-ups, if you can't do a standard one on the floor, modify them by leaning against a wall, leaning against a table, or on your knees on the floor. The lower you go the harder they are. Start with two to three sets of crunches and push-ups, 12-15 repetitions, three to four days a week. As they get easier, you can increase the intensity of crunches by going slower or putting your legs in the air with your knees bent. As push-ups get easier, you can go to the next lower level (for example, from wall to table to on your knees on the floor).
I suggest keeping records of your weekly progress by writing down what happens, or at least checking off that you followed through, and then setting your weekly plan every week for at least three months. Then at three months, you can evaluate your progress and see if any changes need to be made. How will you know if you're ready to stop setting weekly goals each week? Ask yourself if you believe you will be exercising regularly in six months. If the answer is "I'm not sure," or "no," then you ought to continue to set weekly goals. If you are confident that you can maintain the behavior and will be exercising in six months, then you may not need to set weekly goals, but at the first sign of slipping, you ought to go back to it.


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National Women's Hockey League Game-Worn Jersey Auction - Ends: 12/15/2016
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Lot #30:
Shiann Darkangelo - Buffalo Beauts - 2016-17 NWHL Game-Worn Preseason Jersey
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This lot is closed for bidding. Bidding ended on 12/15/2016
Welcome to the National Women's Hockey League-MeiGray Group Game-Worn Jersey Authentication Program's Inaugural Game-Worn Jersey Auction.
The NWHL, now in its second season, is the first professional women's hockey league in North America to pay its players. The Inaugural season began on October 11, 2015 and ended with the Boston Pride raising the first Isobel Cup on March 12, 2016.
MeiGray, named the Official Game-Worn Jersey Source for the National Women's Hockey League, will throughout the 2016-17 season will be offering game-worn jerseys from all four NWHL clubs: Boston Pride, Buffalo Beauts, Connecticut Whale and New York Riveters.
The NWHL-MeiGray Group Game-Worn Jersey Authentication Program is proud to offer fans and collectors across the globe the opportunity to own a piece of history ...
an actual jersey worn by #27 Shiann Darkangelo of the Buffalo Beauts during the 2016-2017 National Women's Hockey League preseason.
Darkangelo tallied 13 points in 13 games last season for the Connecticut Whale and helped Team USA to the gold medal at the 2016 IIHF World Championships. She played college hockey at Syracuse University for two seasons before transferring to Quinnipiac University to finish her college career.
This Blue jersey, a Size 48, is registered into the MeiGray Group Game-Worn Jersey Authentication Program as number MGG010251. Each jersey has the player's native country flag on the left sleeve.
The NWHL-MGG Auction season is kicking off with one complete set of game-worn jerseys from each of the four clubs, worn exclusively during the 2016-17 NWHL preseason.
The Beauts were the league's first upset-minded squad as they finished with a pedestrian 5-9-4 regular-season record. Led by Kelley Steadman (13 goals and seven assists in 13 games), they posted two four-goal performances against the Connecticut Whale to advance to the finals, where they were swept by the Boston Pride. Team U.S.A. hockey captain Meghan Duggan and six-time Women's Hockey World Championships gold medal was also a key part of the run to the finals, scoring six goals with ten assists during the regular season.
MGG also works with eight National Hockey League clubs: Boston Bruins, Columbus Blue Jackets, Dallas Stars, Edmonton Oilers, Nashville Predators, New Jersey Devils, Philadelphia Flyers and Washington Capitals.
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Shiann Darkangelo - Buffalo Beauts - 2016-17 NWHL Game-Worn Preseason Jersey
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