text:
Lazarus: sharingMature
By the time I woke up, I was praying that Line had forgotten about my promise to explain why I'd gotten so drunk the other night. But, just as I'd expected, he hadn't. He gently prodded for the promised reasons for drinking. Needless to say, I was unwilling; I pulled my pillow over my face, pretending that the outside world didn't exist.
"I can't help you if you won't tell me what's wrong," he said innocently.
"I'll be fine once Fate's better and out of the house," I replied through a mouthful of pillow, sort of attempting to hint a little bit at what'd been on my mind lately.
"And who knows when that'll be."
"Look, Fate's the one that needs help, not me. I'll be fine."
"Please, Lazarus," he played with the hair that poked out from under the pillow, which I pulled off, giving him the best puppy eyes I could manage. I didn't know how to tell him, even if I wanted to. How were you supposed to put words to something like that? He kissed the top of my head as I tried to think of how to tell him.
"Fate isn't the only one in this house that's been raped," I said eventually, very, very quietly. I avoided looking at Line as I spoke; I didn't want to see the disgust or disappointment that would probably be in his eyes. "I just... know how he feels, I guess. Seeing him like that brought it all back." To my surprise, Line wrapped me in a cuddle, holding me a little tighter when he couldn't think of anything to say. I buried my face in his neck, getting another kiss on my head. I sniffled a little. "It was ages ago, I'm just being stupid because I've never had to talk about it before."
"You don't have to talk about it, if you don't want."
"I told you I'd explain why I broke my promise to you. You've heard more than anyone else ever has," I mumbled, going on to tell him about how it happened on a depressingly regular basis during the century I was a whore and how fucking pathetic it made me feel to remember the last time it happened was in 1915. That was nearly a hundred years ago now and it still had the power to emotionally cripple me. Line told me I wasn't pathetic, but I didn't believe him. I thought it was pretty fucking pathetic to still be upset by something that happened so long ago. Once it was all out, I felt a little weird. I'd never told anyone about all that before. It just stayed in the back of my mind, locked away somewhere it couldn't hurt me.
It didn't take me long to start insisting that Line should be looking after Fate again. I told him that Fate was supposed to be his priority, but he didn't seem to care, and he didn't let go of me. He told me that I could talk to him about stuff in my past if I ever needed to and I managed to mutter some kind of thanks. He smiled.
"I think that was probably the worst of it," I mumbled.
"I was born in the Victorian era sometime. I was the firstborn son in a regular German family, went to school, did well enough to study to be a doctor, and obviously succeeded," Line told me. I looked up at him, not too sure where he was going with that. He flashed me a smile. Maybe he wanted me to share more with him about myself.
"I think I was born in the early seventeen hundreds, youngest of three. My family were... I dunno, I guess we were normal for that time. Poor as fuck, though," I laughed a little. "Nothing's changed there. We found this old abandoned piano that some rich folk had gotten rid of and mended it up so my sister could learn. I learnt, too, when I was seven. I got good, and noticed by people. Particularly Gabriel." He nodded a little, so I sort of carried on. "He was terrible at music, but since his father was paying for piano lessons anyway, I ended up taking them. In the end I spent more time with him than anyone else and we got... close. I can't remember if he knew I liked other guys before I kissed him. Anyway, we spent about ten years together after he got his head around it, before I got turned and ended up killing him."
"I was turned at the height of my career. I was one of the most well known doctors in my city, and was well on my way to opening my own practice. I married young, to a girl named Alice. We had been married little over a year, and we had a child on the way. We were on our way back from a meal, I think, and decided to walk through the park, when these two giant wolves appeared out of nowhere and attacked us. Alice didn't stand a chance. Neither of us did. Someone heard the commotion and scared them away, but it was too late for her." I couldn't think of anything to say. 'I'm sorry' didn't seem like it would be enough. I had lost Gabriel through instinctual self preservation. Line had lost his wife and unborn child. That was without a doubt harder. "I did my grieving all those years ago, I'm just glad she's at peace."
"I killed Gabriel by accident. I was changed on the first night of the full moon. On the second, I changed and the idiot tried to shoot me. My instincts took control and I attacked him. It took a hell of a long time to accept what I was after that."
"I can imagine."
"Mostly, I stayed in London. They never suspected it was me that killed him, and after he was buried, I hid out in the city, doing whatever I could to survive. I tried to stick to the usual trades. I worked in a brewery, as a shoemaker like my dad, helped out in shops, did deliveries. But the easiest job was just to sell my body," I shrugged a little, "I'd discovered drinking, so I could just go back to the room I had above an inn and drink myself to sleep. A habit that no one's seemed to care enough about to break 'til you came along."
"Lucky you, falling for a doctor, eh?" He let out a chuckle. "I stayed where I was for as long as I could, and travelled around when people started to get suspicious. I stuck to mostly German speaking countries, since I could barely introduce myself in English, but eventually I stopped caring. My experience was enough to get me by, and my patients were usually in too critical a condition to do much speaking anyway. I made my way back to Germany after a while, and after meeting up with one of my father's friends, we arranged a sort of secret deal; every few years, he would add my name to the birth register, since that was his job, and would save me from having to flee the country."
"What was your name? Originally?" I asked curiously.
He actually had to think about it for a moment before answering: "Alaric."
I hummed, "I prefer Line." Maybe it was just because that was all I'd ever known him as, but it seemed to suit him better.
"I should be offended," he laughed and I pressed my lips to his, admittedly a little relieved when he returned the kiss.
"Well you can slate my name all you like. I've never been fond of it," I said with a slight chuckle.
"It suits you."
"I just associate it with my Catholic past, since Lazarus is a biblical character," I shrugged, smiling as he kissed my cheek, smiling back at me.
"I'm not sure what else there is to tell you about my past," I mused, "I spent far too long selling my body to desperate people and then I'd saved up enough to buy a small place on the edge of London. Except then the First World War started and I had to leave it to go fight."
"Well, what happened after the wars? As you already know, I volunteered during the First World War, and through some luck managed to stay away from the front for the most part. As for the Second... I wasn't so willing to join up, then."
"I spent a very long time being shell-shocked. The first war fucked me over enough, given that I spent it pretty much on my own being used as a secret weapon. The guys that... y'know, they didn't survive the first, so the second one was sort of a fresh start. I got promoted pretty fast when they realised I actually had some sense. I still got used. The ones that sat around in offices remembered me from before and told me I had to do it again. That house I spent so long saving up for got bombed in the air raids, so I spent a lot of time homeless, too." Line wrapped his arms around me, and I snuggled into him, grateful for the closeness.
"I spent a few months being the plaything of the Russians, but they let me go for some reason. One of them seemed to recognise me, though I'm not sure how. After that, I travelled for a while again, but, like always, ended up back in Germany. I spent a few years learning new medical procedures, and tried to settle back into normal life. I even married again," he paused and I looked at him, curious to know about this other marriage but he just shook his head a little. "It wasn't meant to be. And then I came here. I didn't speak English that well, and almost everyone thought I was there to start some kind of Nazi revival, but eventually I found someone kind enough to take me in and teach me the language. I found the pack not long after, and you know the rest," he chuckled.
I nuzzled his shoulder a little, still wanting to know about this other marriage of his. I didn't want to ask, though. It was in the past now, and despite how much I wanted to know about it, I knew better than to ask. He seemed to guess that I wanted to know, though, because after a moment, he carried on, answering my unspoken question.
"Her name was Leondra. Her name was very fitting; brave as a lioness. She found out what I was, and instead of calling me a monster or a lunatic, she sat with me, asking questions with this curious look on her face. She'd asked me to turn her, and I'd agreed, but our plans were put on hold when she found out she was expecting. Something went wrong, though, and she had a miscarriage that ended up killing her too. Over the years, I've noticed I don't have much luck with children or wives," he chuckled a little, even though what he'd just said wasn't funny in the slightest. I cuddled him, wondering what I could say to lighten the mood a little.
"I won't ever suggest getting married or adopting then," I let out a little giggle, relief flooding me once again as he laughed.
"Y'never know. You're not a wife, and it's only my own children I seem to have bad luck with."
"Touché," I said, earning a smile from him. "M'really sorry I broke my promise," I said after a while.
"It's fine," he told me, planting a kiss on the top of my head.
"Even so, I should be looking after Fate, not wallowing," I said with a tiny smile. I wanted to look after Fate, even though he did leave me for Brody, but knowing what he was going through was almost forcing me to relive and deal with what had happened to me all over again too.
"You're allowed to wallow all you want," he told me.
"Why? It was all so long ago." I didn't feel like I should care about it anymore. It all felt so recent, but in reality, nothing had happened like that since 1915.
"Just because it happened a long time ago doesn't mean you're not allowed to be bothered about it."
"I s'pose. But it can wait til Fate's better. I'll try and get my head together for him. And you," I added, snuggling in as close as I could to him as he cuddled me. I didn't know if I could say that I loved Line yet, but I sure as hell cared, and he didn't deserve to put up with so much crap from me. As I rested my head on his shoulder, I resolved that I'd try harder to get sober and be as much of a normal human as I could be for him. I owed him that much at least.


text:
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subset: commoncrawl


text:
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text:
|Message view
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|"Rogier Peters" <rmpet...@yahoo.com>
|Generating pipeline's content to xml
|Mon, 18 Feb 2002 20:45:08 GMT
Hi, I'm looking for a way to generate a pipeline's content for a given url, instead of the result of its execution. Basically I'd be asking cocoon: what pipeline would you use for this url? In other words: the url: http://localhost:8080/hello.html.sitemap would have to yield the response: <map:match pattern="hello.html"> <map:generate src="docs/samples/hello-page.xml"/> <map:transform src="stylesheets/page/simple-page2html.xsl"/> <map:serialize type="html"/> </map:match> I realize this example would be easily solved by xls-transformation of the sitemap, but afaik this isn't possible for more complex mappings. I'm guessing the best/quickest/only solution would be to write a custom generator for this. Any other suggestions? Thanks Rogier Peters --------------------------------------------------------------------- To unsubscribe, e-mail: firstname.lastname@example.com For additional commands, email: email@example.com
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text:
As a jobbing comprehensive school teacher, Francis Gilbert writes about a world he knows well, while adding a few dark classroom twists involving an expelled student, a chilling letter of accusation and an untimely death.
Martin Hicks, a school teacher seeking promotion, suddenly feels his life unravelling - his marriage is already on the rocks when an anonymous note accuses him of sexual abuse (bizarrely mentioning "puppetry with his penis").
The letter gets him a suspension. He and a Hungarian student set about clearing his name, in this clever generic hybrid of classroom drama cum whodunnit. The effect is an addictive blend reminiscent of the TV series, Teachers, mixed with detective noir.Reuse content


text:
The first customer I saw wanted to look at a green VW van, it looked like it had some graffiti on the side panel. I told the man that I wouldn't buy the van as it was a heep of junk, I did everything I could to put him off. It worked.
I then went around from one person to another, telling them how bad the cars were and not to buy them. As I did this I was thinking that I'd really like to impress the boss and sell lots of cars.
I just wasn't understanding why I couldn't sell any!


text:
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text: Posted August 6, 2007 I also posted this in the metro forum, but Cedar is between the two areas and I know of some folks further south that fish this lake, so I thought I'd notify this forum as well....My Sister and Brother-in-law live on Cedar Lake about 5 miles north of New Prague. While it's shallow and choked with Curly Leaf Pondweed for about a month every summer, the lake is a great spring, fall and winter fishery for Walleyes, Bass, Panfish, and the occasional Muskie.But as of last weekend, my brother-in-law has counted 10-15 walleyes either washed up or floating. None of them under 27 inches!We've caught some big ones out there before and knew they were in there, but to see that many big ones dead is pretty disheartening. The lake is down about 2 feet making the deepest part of the lake around 10ft. He contacted the DNR but they said they didn't want to start the aerators because it would more than likely just stir up silt and make the water worse.Any other Cedar fisherman out there who've seen more of this?Looks like it might be a few years before that lake is good for eyes again.Pray for rain! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites


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text: Cst R800 Car Dvr Technical Specification - Shenzhen Cyhy Information Co.,ltd Toggle navigation TRADE DEALS Products Companies Product Company Search LOGIN E-mail Password Remember me Join Free JOIN FREE HomeAgriculture Automobile & Motorcycles Cst R800 Car Dvr Technical Specification PRICE: contract price Product Description CST R800 Car DVRTechnical Specification 1 Product FeaturesR800 car dvr is our new cost-effective and independent research and development product, based on our many years experience and advanced technology. It meets market requirement very much. With high-end configuration and advanced performance, it is with higher quality and reliability. Moreover, it is with fashion styling. Its humanized designs are reflected in every detail, like cigar light take electricity directly, both opening wiring and concealing wiring are ok. Besides, easy installation will release you from trouble.2 Unit Specification2.1 Brand: CSTModel:CSTR8002.2 Main technical parameters Table 1 main technical parameter NumberNameparameterremark1brandCST2model R8003scheme Novatek4CoreDual core(ARM and DSP)5Lens formFront camera6Physical pixel1200W7Photographic resolution1080PAdjustable720P8Max apertureF2.09Wide angle170°10Screen size4.3 inch11Screen placemiddle12Video formatMOV13Product colorblack14Storage mediumTF card, maximum 32G15Loop video time4-5 hours32G16Host Dimension 310*89*35 mm17Net Weight2.8Kg18Package345*120*65 mm19Gross Weight3.1 Kg20LanguageSimplified Chinese,Traditional Chinese,English,French,German, Japanese,Spanish,Italian,Portuguese, Russian21Operating temperature-20℃-80℃2.3 Product formal size 2.4.Feature2.4.1 4.3inch HD screen, make your eyes more comfortable;The appearance of the fashion and elegant modelling designed by the top master. 2.4.2 HD 1080P picture quality, the picture is more clear and vivid, you can select the resolution 1080P or 720P, different scenarios to meet your needs. 2.4.3 With 6 groups full glass lenses, small lens big picture, effectively prevent reflected glare, in order to provide more exquisite photo, 170 ° ultra wide Angle, lens fluctuation around 360 ° Angle adjustable, 1200w photo pixels, it rival to SLR cameras.2.4.4. G - sensor mutation induction, induction to impact or vibration will trigger the special video, which will not be covered at this time, to preserve emergency video files, for a rainy day.2.4.5.More quickly motion detecting, if had moving object in some extent in front of camera, moving object motion detecting automatically open, give your car a full range of guardian.2.4.6. Taking a photo by One-click , according to your demand, you can set taking a photo by one-click picture, to meet you preservation of the view of the need, or you interested in the scene.2.4.7Continuous recording,meet the needs of your all-time video recording; support recording voice function, restore the site's voice.2.4.8Wide field of vision,blue anti-glare rearview mirror, so you no longer worries the car light dazzling and it can effectively prevent visual fatigue, it is very naturally and clear.10.Wide dynamic and highly dynamic: no matter the car from light into darkness or from the darkness into the light, or other mutation conditions,etc., the image still clarity without distortion..11.High Strength environmental ABS + PC material, use the environmentally friendly materials like laptops and cell phones , wear-resistant, corrosion-resistant, high temperature, shock.12.170°Super wide angle, front glance, details of the perfect show. Other products Factory price hidden night vision car dvr camera fit for maserati car with wifi support mobilephone Price: contract price 2016 best special hidden car dvr car camera 1080p 170 degree support app with best price Price: contract price Cst r800 car dvr technical specification Price: contract price Cheap new obd2 car dvr 170 degree car recorder 1080p with night vision g-sensor fit for maserati car Price: contract price Company Info Shenzhen Cyhy Information Co.,ltd Contact Person: Sha Wu Phone: 86-755-22157320 Contact now × Contact form Your name: Your E-mail: Your Phone: Subject: Enter a message: Close


text:
Flames: Coma
James explodes the wall and there is only black, empty nothing behind it. He jumps- or rather, explodes upwards- and there is suddenly nothing but black.
I can't be unconcious, or I wouldn't be able to hear him shout.
"Give me a clue! Please just give me a clue , someones hurts and its my fault!" he yells at the sky. I want to tell him it's not his fault, but how in hell am I supposed to do that?
I hear his footsteps walking away- has he forgotten me, helpless on the ground?
"Well let's see what that does for us," he says.
You like him, says a voice in my head.
Who the heck are you?
It's your concience
Go away.
No. You like him
No I don't
No, you're right. You don't like him, you love him.
No I don't! Piss off!
No. you luurrve him
Go away!
My 'Concience' doesn't say anything else, but a have an annoying feeling it might have been slightly right.


text:
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November 2014
BeschreibungThe number of e-commerce websites has drastically increased in these past few years. Building your own web store is a complex and expensive task; that's why open source solutions such as PrestaShop have become so successful in tackling this issue. The main interest with open source solutions is that you can easily add or edit features by creating modules.This practical, hands-on guide provides you with a number of clear, step-by-step exercises to help you understand how PrestaShop works, and also help you add and edit features.Starting with the basics, this book takes you through complete module development in an effective manner. You will learn about module architecture, what a hook is, and how to use it to add functionalities to PrestaShop. You will also see how to build payment and carrier modules and make your module multistore-ready. Develop PrestaShop modules the right way and make them secure and compliant with different versions of PrestaShop.
Untertitel: Sprache: Englisch.
Verlag: Packt Publishing
Erscheinungsdatum: November 2014
Seitenanzahl: 254 Seiten
Format: epub eBook
Kopierschutz: Adobe DRM


text:
Silent HuntersMature
The Hornet shuddered as its landing gear made contact with the Scipio's tarmac. Mathew gave a thumbs up to the traffic technician who had ground guided him to the parking space and then continued with shutdown procedures. He powered down the primary systems as the engines whined in diminuendo, and then decoupled the main power breaker which resounded with a low thud. He kept auxiliary power active, pulling the canopy release lever to hear a hiss of air as the pressures equalized. A red light aggravatingly ignited on the annunciator panel, followed by a warning buzzer.
Something was wrong.
Mathew's head swiveled around as he searched for the problem. Before he could determine the source of the alarm, he was startled by a knock on the canopy.
"Jesus!" He exclaimed, taking in deep anxious breaths.
"The uni-rail is seizing from the impact damage." The technician's words were muffled. He was screaming into the glass while hanging off the boarding ladder that extended to the Scipio's flight deck from the left side of the Hornet's canopy.
"So what, you're saying I can't get out?" Mathew replied loudly, his throat coarse with the effort. Suddenly he found himself concerned about the possibility of being trapped in the cockpit for who knows how long.
"For now, yeah. You'll have to give us a minute to assess the damage. We'll give you an estimate for how long it'll take us to free it up. Sit tight and turn off auxiliary power."
Mathew nodded, reaching down and disengaging battery power. All lights in the cockpit were extinguished, save one. The orange flashing pinprick was letting Mathew know that his emergency suite was still active. If he were to spontaneously combust, the automated fire and explosion suppression system would kick into action, dousing him and the components of the cockpit with a neutralizing powder, subsequently assessing his suits seal to decide whether or not to vent the cockpit's atmosphere in order to completely remove the possibility of fire. An older system lacked the neutralizing powder stage, and so in the event that a pilots flight suite was ruptured, he would decompress along with the cockpit when the fire evacuation system engaged. Although it is possible to survive vacuum for short periods of time, the effects on the body are still quite undesirable. He was glad that, so far, he had not been unlucky enough to witness the system in action other than in training videos.
A clatter on the hull made him jump out of his seat as far as the harnesses would let him; his mind still on the thoughts of fiery demise. The technician was back, and apparently in the day and age of unhindered space travel, the most high tech solution for a seized Hornet canopy uni-rail, was to apply excessive force with what seemed to Mathew like an oversized crowbar.
"Really?" He yelled through the glass. "You don't have any better ideas?"
The technician shook his head indignantly. "You want to do it from the inside? How 'bout I just let you sit in there until you figure out a better way. Sound like a plan?"
Mathew sighed. "Go ahead, ape it all you want, I'm sure there's a cutter or spanner or something more useful then a giant can opener."
"Listen, I'm not the one that just damaged a multi-million credit asset of military hardware."
Mathew furrowed his brow and sucked in air before yelling through the windscreen once again. "You aren't doing much fixing at the moment though are you. I could imagine each time you pry with that thing a few dollar signs are popping out of the paint."
"Trust me pal, from what I heard you're going to be scrubbing toilets for the rest of the tour. The Captain himself is on his way down to talk to you."
Mathew let his head fall back, slamming limp against the seat. "Great. First impressions are the greatest, and I'll be known as the guy who plays bumper Hornets." He gritted his teeth and turned back to the technician. "Hey, where's that time assessment?"
The technician gave him the finger.
"That long huh?" Mathew said, shaking his head. "Asshole."
In high orbit, Mittens and his Dread Hounds watched the sun rising over the black disk that was Terra; bright fingers of light streaking across space to activate the auto-tinting properties of the Hornet's canopy.
"What are we even doing?" Asked Drenix, tapping his navigation screen on one of the multi function displays. "We're literally just going in circles."
Mittens keyed his mic, "We're waiting for information Drenix, be patient."
Ribs, the second in command, took his turn to speak. "Patience is over-rated, and so is blind obedience. We need to act with initiative. If they aren't giving us any information we should go get it ourselves."
"What would you suggest?" Mittens asked, sincerely open to the possibility of alternative action.
"Wait, what was that?" Songbird said, interrupting the conversation.
"What was what?" asked Mittens to the bomber pilot.
"You didn't see that just now? I swear I saw a signature light up on radar."
All of the pilots peered down at their scopes. Nothing was visible.
"I don't see a thing." Mittens said. "Are you sure?"
Songbird keyed in again. "Positive."
Amon Almitt's eyes narrowed. He peered into the darkness beyond his canopy and willed himself to sense the presence of the enemy. "Hounds …" he said taking in a deep breath, "Ready up."
The Hornets in orbit around Terra extinguished their formation lights and charged capacitors.
Beyond, in the emptiness, dark hulks drifted silently toward their prey.


text:
The Police Service Commission (PSC), yesterday, said it has, so far, received 705,352 applications from applicants seeking to join the Nigerian Police Force in the recently advertised 10,000 vacancies into the service.
The commission, in a statement, said a breakdown of the applications it received showed that 202, 427 candidates applied for the position of Cadet Assistant Superintendent of Police (ASP), 169,446, for the position of Cadet Inspector and 333,479 for the position of Constables.
This was even as the commission has promised to ensure a free, fair and equal opportunity for all applicants to ensure that only the best are recruited into the police force.
Head of Press and Public Relations of PSC, Ikechukwu Ani said, of the number, the commission would be recruiting 500 Cadet ASPs, 500 Cadet Inspectors, 1,500 Specialist Officers and 7, 500 Constables to meet President Muhammadu Buhari's approved 10,000 new entrants into the force.
Ani, who said the recruitment exercise has been smooth so far, said Chairman of the Commission, Dr. Mike Mbama Okiro, was committed to making the recruitment exercise a huge success, adding that the commission would continue to make the process of the recruitment transparent.
Meanwhile, Inspector General of Police, Solomon Arase, yesterday, in Kaduna, warned men and officers of Nigerian Police Force (NPF) against violation of human rights during their encounter with Nigerian populace on a daily basis.
The IGP, stated this at the opening session of a four-day regional based human rights training of trainers workshop for instructors from training institutions in northern region.
The workshop, according to him, is expected to look at array of human rights issues including access to information and accountability, speeding up criminal justice process and human rights, rights of person under detention and prevention of torture, human rights and policing elections, gender and human rights, use of force and firearms.
The IGP, who was represented by Assistant Inspector General of Police in charge of training and development, AIG Olufemi Adenaike, while fielding questions from newsmen reiterated the commitment of the police not to spare any of their men or officers found guilty of any human rights abuse.
He further emphasised that the fundamental duties of a police officer include, serving the community, safeguarding lives and property, protecting the innocent, keeping the peace and ensuring the rights of all to liberty, equality and justice, adding that anything in contrary may amount to violation of human right… I wish to express my sincere gratitude to the organisation's Executive Director, Dr. Uju Agomoh, who is also the coordinator of the project," he added.


text:
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Esquire: Mila Kunis is the Sexiest Woman Alive
Joyce Park stashed this in Entertainment
Stashed in: Mila Kunis
Mila Kunis is sexy because of her comic timing, her tired-sexy eyes, and her World of Warcraft prowess... not because she shows T&A.
Also, on Family Guy she is Meg Griffin, the least-sexy character on the planet.
Other facts about Mila Kunis that make her an unusual choice:
1. She plays World of Warcraft. Video of her talking about it.
2. She's Jewish. She has cited antisemitism in the former Soviet Union as one of several reasons for her family's move to the United States. She says that her parents "raised [her] Jewish as much as they could," although religion was suppressed in the Soviet Union.
3. She has no Facebook or Twitter. Even though she's a self-confessed computer nerd: "Why would I want to share my life with the world when it's being shared already, without my consent? The only problem with not having an account is that there are fake accounts, pretending to quote me. But what am I going to tweet about?"
(Several notable people have no Twitter for similar reason.)


text:
The TabMature
It takes me all of five minutes to decide to go see him. I mean I at the very least his offer might kill the monotony that is my life. And as for his threats in regards to destroying my life, I don't believe there's much to destroy. Bring it on old fool. After greeting him again at the poker tables he walks away gesturing me to follow. He then leads me to the basement and his private office a stone grey room with two chairs a table and a constant drip drip drip to drive you to insanity. He sits at the table and gestures to me to take a seat opposite to him. I comply. I somehow have managed not to use my smart mouth again with his man. He looks small and frail but exudes… confidence I guess, power maybe? It's hard to say. Either way I really don't want to fuck with him. I sit like a good dog.
'To start' he croaks' Do you believe in… what's the word they use now oh… the supernatural I guess'
I look at him like he's crazy (he probably is) 'No not at all I say, I am and remain I rationalist'
He smiles slyly 'oh this should be fun then' he searches in his pocket and pulls out a tab with a picture of the weird polyhedron from before on it, placing it upon the table
' Take this' he commands.
' Waitwaitwait… stop. You brought me down here to drop acid. That's your amazing opportunity'
The old man chuckled, it was the kind of chuckle a serial killer would give before finishing off his prey
'Maybe it is and maybe the boy should stop asking so many fucking questions' He reached out across the table and slapped me, there was little pain. My pride was damaged more than anything. But then my pride has always being pretty fragile. I didn't want to do this, I'd stayed away from this stuff since Sarah asked, I didn't believe it was that bad for me, I'd had some good experiences but she worried. But fuck her. She isn't here now. She's why I've got into this whole mess. I took the tab and placed it under my tongue.
'So what we gonna do whilst I wait for this to kick in?'
We played cards in the dank grey room for half an hour.
The old man was very very good.


text:
Portable Device
Definition - What does Portable Device mean?
A portable device is any device that can easily be carried. It is a small form factor of a computing device that is designed to be held and used in the hands. Portable devices are becoming an increasingly important part of personal computing as the capabilities of devices like laptops, tablets and smartphones continue to improve.
A portable device may also be called a handheld device or mobile device.
Techopedia explains Portable Device
Portable devices are primarily battery powered devices with base computing resources in the form of a processor, memory, and storage and network access. The latest portable devices are thin and lightweight, making them easy to carry and hold. This was not the case for earlier attempts at portable computers.
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When you look around your neighborhood or community, do you notice a glaring need that you'd like to address? Do you wonder if, provided the resources, you could improve the lives of those around you? Whether through a community garden, an arts program, a fundraiser for a local charity or another project, you have the power to initiate meaningful change through unique fundraising ideas for your community. Crowdfunding allows you to access the money necessary to get your work started. Fundraisers bring your community together and allow you to forge deeper bonds with those who want to help, all while improving your shared space. Here are some fundraising ideas to help you get started in your community.
Six Great Ways to Support the Community:
1. Hold a kick-off barbecue in a local park
Spread the word about your fundraiser to your community by holding an event the night it launches. Through invitations you can give neighbors a sneak peak at your plans, as well as an opportunity to get involved as early on in the process as possible. On the night of your launch, chat with guests and get as much feedback as you can. Seek out individuals whose specialized knowledge could benefit your campaign, and celebrate, raise awareness, and recruit potential collaborators all in one evening.
2. Create volunteer days for outdoor projects
For outdoor projects such as building a garden, clearing a hiking trail, or improving existing infrastructure, create volunteer days in which the community comes together to do some heavy lifting. Add some music, and suddenly a day of weeding turns into an afternoon party. Document the event on your page and post it on social media to showcase your community's effort and enthusiasm. To avoid injury, though, make sure the work is suited to the age groups of the volunteers, maybe designating kid-safe tasks to the younger set.
3. Organize a give-back social event – Plan a community social event that centers around giving back. Be it a blood drive for a fundraiser to expand health resources, a kids clothing drive for one that focuses on childrens' issues, or a day of tree-planting for a campaign related to the environment, coming together as a community demonstrates sincere commitment to a cause. Not only does the activity strengthen ties within your neighborhood, it also creates connections with other groups who share your values. Since crowdfunding is all about teamwork and social connections, these events can only help your campaign.
4. Rally kids in the community for support
Recruit industrious kids in your neighborhood to hold lemonade stands for your fundraiser, and encourage them to spread the word about your project. Hold bake sales, raffles and any other forms of fundraising that appeal to you, but use these events as opportunities to explain what you're working on and why. Feature the link to your YouCaring campaign prominently, and solicit social media shares.
5. Help a neighbor
Not all community fundraisers go toward developing infrastructure or creating a program. Many aren't even "projects" in the traditional sense, but rather fundraisers created solely to accommodate the needs of a neighbor in a bind. Community fundraisers for individuals can help the recipient through a crisis or financial downturn, for example by providing enough money to make rent. These fundraisers are popular in areas where property values have risen quickly and unexpectedly, displacing individuals or small businesses that may have been a pillar of the community.
6. Get social
Take advantage of your unique crowdfunding resources by promoting your community fundraiser online with a social media hashtag. Feature posts from people who will benefit from your project, and encourage widespread shares and likes from within the community. Because this project will serve a wide group of people, you have a unique opportunity to engage with a broader net of online contacts. Those who can't donate can help the fundraising process by communicating it to those who might be able to.
YouCaring Community in Action
- B&H Dairy Restaurant, a landmark New York City deli that has operated in the same location since 1938, ran into unexpected trouble in March. The owners were required to make unforeseen upgrades to their facilities after an explosion and fire destroyed half their block and killed several people. Although B&H wasn't touched by the fire, city officials demanded that owners Fawzy and Ola make changes that would cost them nearly $30,000 before it could reopen. The expenses seemed insurmountable to the couple, and a just few months ago, closure seemed inevitable. But due to a successful YouCaring campaign and publicity in outlets including the New York Times, the deli will finally reopen this week.
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Community fundraisers provide a special opportunity to reawaken the spirit of neighborly cooperation, providing recipients the tools to lending help a hand and positively impact their community. In the process of conducting a crowdfunding campaign, users develop friendships, strengthen bonds, and reach out to donors who they may have never even met before.
Take the first step toward making a difference in your community. Start your own free YouCaring fundraiser.


text:
I need to puff some powdered Sevin in hole in my friends house to get rid of a huge Yellowjacket nest. I know it would be better at night, but this won't be an option. After I suit up will smoking the hole calm them like it does honey bees?
I need to puff some powdered Sevin in hole in my friends house to get rid of a huge Yellowjacket nest. I know it would be better at night, but this won't be an option. After I suit up will smoking the hole calm them like it does honey bees?
My grandad used to park a push mower over the hole while running and left it.... It worked for him more than once. I have never been brave enough to try it since I'm allergic to them demons!
That's not what I asked. Does smoke calm Yellow Jackets like it does honeybees? Besides I can't put a lawnmower up against the siding
of the house.
I have just dumped the sevin into the entrance opening, some gets spilled around the entrance but it works--am estimating about half a cup or so of sevin dust.
When no yellow jackets are coming or going in a few days seal the entrance or dig the nest up-whichever suits. There will be capped brood inside the nest hatching so be careful.
"Younz" have a great day, I will.
The problem is I need to use a turkey baster and puff the sevin in a hole
that goes straight up. I have dumped it over a hole in the ground many times, and I know that it works, but since I will be puffing several basters full of powder, I need a way to calm them in the process. I know all the ways to kill them, all I want to know is if smoke calms them like a honeybee?
I was smoking a nest of paper wasp last night for the fun of it. They didn't seem to calm at all. They actually seemed quit angry about the whole thing.
Chuck Norris has a grizzly bear carpet in his room. The bear isn't dead it is just afraid to move.
I tried smoking yellowjackets last year. I don't think it worked at all. Trouble is, I was smoking at an entrance that went into the basement area and wall cavity. Even if smoke was effective, I don't know how far it traveled and how many yellow jackets may have been exposed to it. I gave up.
"My wife always wanted girls. Just not thousands and thousands of them......"
Not in my experience. I don't think smoke works with YJ's.
Smoke doesn't work with wasps.
Smoke disorientates honey bees. I don't think that it calms them. It just temporarily messes them up.
The only smoke a yellow jacket respects is after a 1/4 cup of gas and a match.
Try a few qts of soapy water.Early morning is best.
You have to remember that smoke really doesn't calm honey bees it makes them go down into the comb and ingest honey inorder to prepare to flee from the fire that they think is coming except for brood yellow jackets have nothing to protect but themselves so they will go into self defense mode and trust me they can defend themselves well.
Turkey baster.
You might consider using a 1/2" piece of plastic pipe with an "L" on the delivery end, charge the end, and blow it into the area.
I have used green Light Horticultural oil and it works too.
I have used a smoker in the past and it does not seem to make any influence on their behavior.
I do use WD-40 and apply it directly to them and it will knock them out of the air. Do not inhale the fumes!
My websitehttp://bees4u.com/
I've found smoke doesn't work with yellow jackets.
I've also found that some gas without the match works just as well.
This year I tried placing a white plastic bucket over the hole for a few days. I watched as the yellow jackets bounced around inside, then I needed the bucket and removed it. Oddly, today I noticed no activity in the nest.
Watch it, they will make another hole.
On the side of a house, I don't know. Is it the house or a shed? Depending on that, doing a sort of cutout with extermination in mind might be possible. But I know if it is your home and not a storage building, barn, etc, then doing structural damage and paying to fix it may not be the way.
Then again, sealing up the entrance with caulk or some other material might require them to bore a new entrance that may be in a position where YOU can do more damage to THEM. I have done something similar to that on my shed, but not with yellow jackets. Good luck.
I have removed several yellow jacket colonies out of structures. Smoke does not do much and they can sting through the bee suit. I used a mixture of 1 cup 190pf vodka, 2 tablespoons of liquid dish soap and a quart of water in a pump sprayer. Calmed them right down......permanently.
"The UNKNOWN, huh? That would be SNORBERT ZANGOX over in Waycross."
I don't know. But it seems to work for people. Especially if one smokes grass. But I never saw a yellow jacket smoking. Do they use a pipe or do they roll their own?
Oh, you mean a bee smoker? No. Doesn't do a thing for them.
Mark Berninghausen
Blowtorch worked REAL well, Toasted everybody that was home in seconds ( got them at night ) And it works real well in hard to reach places or as is usually found when the hive hole is at the bottom. Cant really use sprays or lawnmowers on those. LOL. Do bee aware that they WILL come tumbling out but fortunately without wings so you shouldn't have any attack issues but it is a surprise to have two dozen yellow jackets raining down on you. Just don't burn your house down!
claytr, I know you know this, but be very careful about using smoke, fire, gas or anything like that in your friends house --- especially in the walls/attic. Smoke doesn't work on yjs anyway. On a big yj nest I have used a shop vac with the intake positioned to catch every yj as it exits/enters the hole --- soon there are very few yjs left looking for a fight! You may need to let it run for an hour or two. Then use the baster or a long tube to dust the nest area with sevin and seal the hole.
Triangle Bees


text:
Reputation is
Academic &
Vocational Training Pty Ltd has an excellent reputation for
offering quality and comprehensive training in the Marriage
Celebrant course and Funeral Celebrant Course
IV in Celebrancy"
Code number CHC42608 - is a Nationally Accredited
Qualification and is designed for those who wish to be
trained as a Marriage Celebrant or a General
marriage celebrancy program is a specific program as shown
on the Attorney-General's website, and should be
investigated before enrolling in marriage celebrant
training. There are
requirements to be aware of before embarking on the course
to become a marriage celebrant.
3rd February 2010, aspiring marriage celebrants will be
required to complete 13 units, which is the full composite
of Certificate 1V in Celebrancy.
& Vocational Training (A.V.T.) Pty Ltd is a wholly Australian
owned company, employing very successful celebrants as trainers,
tutors and advisors.
Director, Helen Scott, and staff of AVT Pty Ltd proudly offer to all our students, the personal and individual
attention usually found in a small family business, together
with innovative ideas and access to training tools usually
found in large corporations.
We guarantee assessments will be marked within 10 daysWe guarantee you unlimited access to your tutor, during your study period
As the standard of training and access to your tutor can vary a great deal, it is important for students to be confident that they are receiving comprehensive, quality training by qualified trainers. Celebrant Associations assist existing and aspiring celebrants, and are listed on the Attorney-General's website www.ag.gov.au
Academic & Vocational Training Pty Ltd has an excellent reputation, and is proud of the high standard of training that is given to students. Tutors are committed to assisting students for 6 months after completion of the course.
Essential training tools which are the basis of training for aspiring marriage celebrants are:
AVT Pty Ltd has access to all the training aids and information offered by all the Educational bodies associated with Nationally Recognised training courses.
We receive updated information from the Marriage Celebrant's Section of the Federal Attorney-Generals' Department, from the Registry of Births, Deaths and Marriages, from ASQA (Australian Skills Quality Authority) and all other bodies associated with the Nationally AccreditedTraining Package.
All updated information is immediately included in our marriage celebrant training course.
Our trainers and tutors will take all steps necessary to guide the student to a successful outcome.
Our trainers and tutors are not employees of Academic & Vocational Training Pty Ltd.
Our trainers and tutors are stakeholders with a social and intellectual interest in the student's success, which reflects positively on their role as a quality trainer/tutor.
We acknowledge the importance of ceremonies to the clients and to the community, and it is in the interests of the celebrant and the wider community that the celebrant be trained to a level where excellence can be achieved.
It is our wish that celebrants graduating from training from Academic & Vocational Training Pty Ltd, be sought-after as the preferred celebrant in their community.
If you are studying by correspondence (distance), we understand that you may choose, or need to complete some of your course at night-time or at weekends. Your tutor will be available to assist you, if the need arises. We are not a 9 to 5 organisation.
The marriage celebrant training course offered has been written by celebrants who have conducted a combined total of over 5000 ceremonies, and who are committed to display a high level of professionalism to all those who enrol in the course.
The aim of all our trainers and tutors is to lead each student on a career path that will be both socially and financially rewarding for them.
The training courses offered to aspiring or existing celebrants are:
"Certificate IV in Celebrancy" - national Code number CHC42608 is a Nationally Accredited qualification and is a pre-requisite to being registered as a marriage celebrant.
"Plan and Conduct a Funeral Ceremony" is Nationally Accredited training course - a Statement of Attainment awarded on completion of the course Code SIFFNL009A
© 2007 Academic & Vocational Training Pty LtdTELEPHONE: (O2) 49821978 or 0414 424167
EMAIL: [email protected]
PO Box 305 Salamander Bay Port Stephens 2317


text:
This five-light bathroom light fixture is crafted from steel, and comes in a chrome finish with clear, textured molten glass.More Details >
With molten textured clear glass, this contemporary five-light bath light fixture is sure to create drama and add a designer look to your living space. It comes in a sleek chrome finish, and features a frame crafted from steel.
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Used it my Daughters masterbath --could use it either way - facing up or down .


text:
5.30am Thomas wakes up.
6.15am I get ready for work.
7.45am I leave for work. When my husband isn't working, he drops Tess off at her Montessori nursery and looks after Thomas. Otherwise, we rely on a network of friends to look after the kids - some of them are professional childminders and we are very lucky in that we can usually find someone to step into the breach.
8.30am I try to get in at 8.30 so I can leave at 5.30. My job is very busy and demanding, and it is client-based, meaning that I have to be on the ball and upbeat all the time. It's a very competitive industry and there are always deadlines. I try to get in at 7.30am one day a week, and do one late night - that way I don't feel too guilty about letting down the rest of my team, none of whom have children. I very rarely get a lunchhour, unless it's a working one.
5.30pm I jog to the station - that's my exercise for the day.
6.30pm I arrive home in time for bathtime and bedtime.
7pm-8pm The children go down to sleep. I have always been lucky with Tess in that she has had a good sleeping pattern, although she sometimes gets night terrors and comes into our bed (we have a super-kingsize). I think I was more strict with her as a tiny baby and always put her back in her Moses basket after I'd breastfed her. With Thomas, I got into the habit of letting him fall asleep on my chest or tummy, and maybe that has made a difference. He is suffering from terrible separation anxiety at the moment and if he gets really upset, he starts banging his head against the bars of his cot.
9pm Quite often I bring home work, so I spend an hour doing that and picking up e-mails from overseas. My husband and I always cook a proper meal, and sit down together. We don't watch a lot of telly. Thomas often wakes up again at about 9pm and needs his back rubbed to go back to sleep again.
10.30pm If I've had a bad night the night before, I'm in bed by 10.30pm.
1.30am Thomas is teething at the moment, so he usually wakes up again about this time, and again at 3.30am. Until he was nine months, he suffered from colic and was awake and crying every night from 2.30 to 5.30am. I had gone back to work when he was five months, and that was the stage I was having car accidents because I was so tired.
These days I still sometimes feel physically sick with tiredness when I wake up in the morning. I think I pick up colds more frequently, and I'm probably a bit grumpier and more bad-tempered with people. When Thomas was first born, Patrick refused to do nights because he gets big bags under his eyes and he said he'd never get any work if he looked exhausted. But for the past six months he's looked after him most of the time during the day and he's very good with him. The trouble is that, at night, I'm often the one Thomas wants.
Average hours sleep a night: five
Broken: twice
Downtime, with husband, without children: one hour
Philippa Ross, 28, works full time as a PA for a fashion company. She lives in Highgate with her husband Roy, an antiques dealer, and their daughter, Leila, of 17 months, whom they have just taken abroad for the first time. Philippa says motherhood hasn't stopped her doing anything and she still enjoys nights out.
5.30am to 6am Leila wakes up. If she's really bawling, she comes into bed with us and has a bottle..
8.15am I leave for work, arriving at my desk at 9am. On Mondays and Fridays, I take Leila with me and drop her off at the nursery, which is just round the corner from where I work. For the rest of the week Roy looks after her. If he has to go to an auction, he takes her with him.
9am to 6.30pm My work is manic, and I have no time to think about Leila. Luckily my bosses both have children and they are brilliant about the days I have to leave at 5.30 to pick her up from nursery.
7.15pm By the time I get home Leila has usually had her dinner, but we have a bath together and some play and cuddle time. She gets very excited when I get home, so I have to be careful not to overexcite her, otherwise she won't do down.
8.30pm We put her in her cot. Depending on how she's feeling, she might have a good old wail for 20 minutes, but then she'll usually go to sleep.
9pm We sit down and have supper, I stick some washing in, make some calls if I have to, generally potter about.
11pm I go to bed - we have a big sleigh bed and my husband teases me that I'm always trying to slope off early to get into it.
2am Leila wakes up. Ever since she started at nursery in February she seems to pick up constant bugs and infections. If she's sick, she tends to wake up in the early hours of the morning - just when I'm in a deep sleep. I have to bring her into bed, but then she thinks it's play time and jumps around on me for two hours.
4am We all finally get back to sleep again.
I can't remember the last time I had a full night's sleep. By Saturday I am very tired and I try to do as little as possible at the weekend. But I am pretty resilient and my husband is very understanding and helpful.
You just have to get on with it.
Average hours of sleep a night: four and a half
Broken: once
Downtime with husband, without child: two hours
Janine Hogan, 44, is an executive director at London PR company Sante Communications. She lives near Reading with her second husband Martin and their two children, Tommy, 22 months, and Antonia, eight months. Family life has to be run to a strict schedule: Janine works anything between four and six days a week, dividing her time between home and the office.
5.30am On days when I have to go into the office, I get up in plenty of time to wash my hair and get the kids' stuff ready for when my nanny arrives.
6.50am I leave the house to drive to Reading station, where I catch the 7.19 into Paddington. From there I get the Tube to work.
8.40am I arrive at my desk. I tend to skip my lunch break and colleagues bring me back a sandwich.
7pm I try to leave the office by this time, but I am often held up quite late - it depends how busy we are.
9.30pm I arrive back home. The children will have been bathed and put to bed at 7.30pm. I'm lucky - my husband cooks supper.
There are various jobs I like to do before I go to bed - sterilising the babies' bottles for the next day, and wiping down all the surfaces with Domestos (we have a cleaner but she only comes once a week). I also check my e-mails.
10pm I'm rarely in bed later than 10.30pm, but that's just when Tommy wakes up for the first time. He has always been a dreadful sleeper. He just needs a stroke and some reassurance and then he will go back down. Often Martin will go to him, but if I am in a very deep sleep it takes me an hour to go back off again.
4am Antonia almost always sleeps through the night, but Tommy wakes again at 4am. By this stage, if it's a working day, it is barely worth my while trying to go back to sleep again.
Luckily, I am hyperactive. My partner and I rarely go out to socialise now. I'd prefer to be in bed than living it up at a party. We tend to have people over instead, and I love entertaining at home.
Average hours sleep a night: four
Broken: twice
Downtime with partner, without children: one hour
- More about:
- Beds
- Paddington
- Sleep


text:
July 28, 2010
The Juggernaut Index is our annual ranking of NFL teams for fantasy purposes. Repeat: FOR FANTASY PURPOSES. This is not an NFL power ranking. We're not predicting wins and losses here. Instead, we're reviewing each team's projected fantasy contributions — that's it.
When you arrive home from the store with your new Mike Martz offense, the first thing you'll notice is that it's packaged in a really big box. The playbook is several hundred pages long. It weighs six pounds. Alex Smith has described it as "never-ending."
The next thing you'll notice are the grim warning labels: "Manufacturer assumes no responsibility for interceptions, rushing yards, damaged quarterbacks."
The instructions are absurdly detailed, and the parts-list seems to be incomplete. There's no traditional fullback, no pass-catching tight end. There's no indication anywhere that a gun-slinging quarterback is needed or desired. The system relies entirely on timing, protection, passing accuracy, quick decisions, perfect route-running. It's loaded with four-receiver sets and seven-step drops.
If you're the Chicago Bears, it should immediately become clear that assembling this thing is going to be rather difficult with the pieces currently at your disposal — not impossible, but definitely tricky. This is a curious match of system and personnel.
Here's quarterback Jay Cutler(notes) describing his responsibilities in the Martz scheme during an interview with the Chicago Sun-Times:
"In the West Coast [offense], you can see [the open man] and let it fly. But this system is total trust. You have to trust the receivers. You have to trust the call. You have to trust the spots. If you don't, if you don't let it fly when it's supposed to, it's going to be an interception.
"You take your seven steps, you identify the coverage and let the ball go. The receiver is supposed to be there."
Atop the Bears' depth chart at receiver, we find a pair of kick returners (Johnny Knox(notes), Devin Hester(notes)) and a practice squad vet who's now with his fifth team in five seasons (Devin Aromashodu(notes)). Those are the wideouts who are "supposed to be there" at the conclusion of precise, perfectly choreographed routes. Behind those three, Earl Bennett(notes), Rashied Davis(notes) and Juaquin Iglesias(notes) are waiting. It seems foolish to completely write off any of the No. 4-6 receivers here; Martz has transformed ordinary wideouts into fantasy starters before (think Mike Furrey(notes) in 2006). If Knox and the Devins can't master the system, they'll lose snaps.
Of course Hester and Knox can absolutely fly, and Aromashodu was a late-season revelation in '09. (In Week 16, Antoine Winfield(notes) couldn't have stopped him with a Taser and a giant net). There's clear fantasy upside with each player, and none of the three carry a frightening ADP. Do yourself a favor and draft one of 'em, because the Bears' offense should be endlessly entertaining, even if it's not a clinic at all times. The safest of these wideouts is likely Aromashodu, the highest ceiling belongs to Knox (4.34 speed, 6 TDs as a rookie), and the big contract is Hester's (four years, $41 million).
If you're worried about the possibility that this team can't support three ownable fantasy receivers, here's an interesting Martz fact provided by Doug Farrar (via Bear Report):
In 2008, the 49ers ran formations with three receivers 61 percent of the time, good for seventh in the league, and four or more receivers 24 percent of the time, which was good for second in the league. The 2006 Lions' numbers were very similar — 61 percent of the time with three receivers, and 21 percent with four.
If history is any guide, then three additional things will undoubtedly be true about the Bears' passing game in 2010: Greg Olsen(notes) won't have a serious role, Cutler will continue to throw picks, and the QB will get sacked beyond the limits of human endurance. Tight ends simply haven't played a major part in this attack, at least as receiving weapons. Martz generally prefers to use them as in-line blockers, which helps explain the signing of Brandon Manumaleuna(notes) (five years, $15 million). And even the most faithful Martz devotees will concede that interceptions and sacks are basically part of the game script.
Check out this system's dark side:
2008 Niners - 55 sacks (1st in NFL), 19 INTs (5th)
2007 Lions - 54 sacks (3rd), 22 INTs (3rd)
2006 Lions - 63 sacks (2nd), 22 INTs (4th)
2005 Rams - 46 sacks (6th), 24 INTs (2nd)
2004 Rams - 50 sacks (5th), 22 INTs (3rd)
2003 Rams - 43 sacks (4th), 23 INTs (2nd)
2002 Rams - 46 sacks (5th), 27 INTs (1st)
2001 Rams - 40 sacks (13th), 22 INTs (6th)
2000 Rams - 44 sacks (11th), 23 INTs (4th)
1999 Rams - 33 sacks (25th), 15 INTs (22nd)
OK, so there really wasn't a dark side to the Rams in '99. That team was awesome.
But in every other season in which Martz has directed an offense — even in the great years — his quarterbacks have sustained a beating, and they've thrown an uncommon number of picks. It's almost unavoidable in such a high-volume passing game, particularly when so much is demanded from the offensive line. (This would seem like the appropriate time to mention that the Bears' line is no better than a league-average unit on its best days, despite the presence of six-time Pro Bowler Olin Kreutz(notes)). Cutler is one of the most physically talented QBs in the game, but, again, this offense is built on trust, timing, and precision. He could play at an extremely high level in 2010 yet still throw 22 picks and get dropped 50 times.
Thus, when evaluating Cutler in fantasy terms, your scoring format is everything. We know he's going to pile up touchdown passes — he threw 27 in a much more conservative offense last season — but we should also assume a large number of negative plays. If your league awards six points per TD pass and doesn't penalize severely for turnovers, then Cutler may finish among the top-five at his position. But if you play a format that offers four points per TD and deducts three for INTs, he could very well finish 20th. Know your settings; draft Cutler (or don't) accordingly.
The Chicago running game will not, in all likelihood, lead your fantasy team to anything but despair. Matt Forte(notes) is coming off a disastrous season relative to his fantasy ADP. He rushed for just 3.6 yards per carry and 58.1 per game while reaching the end zone only four times on 315 touches. When the Bears approached the goal line last season, Forte became even less effective. Here's another dose of Mr. Farrar:
The 2009 Bears didn't just rank last in the NFL in Red Zone DVOA (-44.8, which was almost twice as bad as the 31st-ranked Rams), but Matt Forte put up the worst expected performance numbers in the 10-year range of our numbers. Given the situations Forte was put in near the goal line, the league-average running back would be expected to score 7.65 touchdowns in a 16-game season.
This isn't at all surprising to Bears fans, nor to Forte owners. He scored only two touchdowns on 19 carries inside the 5-yard line in 2009. Forte was of course a fantasy star in his rookie season, thanks largely to the 379 total touches, but as an actual NFL talent he appears to be just another guy. He still hasn't averaged 4.0 YPC over a full season, and it may not happen this year. He certainly looks like a runner who needs an outstanding O-line and an old school lead-blocking fullback; in Chicago's offense, he'll have neither. Don't be surprised if he loses short-yardage responsibilities to BYU rookie Harvey Unga(notes).
The Bears also signed 30-year-old Chester Taylor(notes) to a four-year, $12.5 million deal back in March ($7 million guaranteed), further complicating the workload situation for Forte. Even though Taylor's best years are behind him (3.6 YPC in '09), he's a capable receiver who will no doubt earn a significant share of the touches.
In PPR leagues, this backfield will deliver a few useful games, but Chicago's RBs clearly aren't ideal fantasy starters in standard formats. At Forte's current Mock Draft Central price (ADP 42.8), I'll never own him.
We conclude, in typical Juggernaut Index fashion, with the defense. This unit was often horrible last year, particularly in the losses to Cincinnati and Arizona. Lovie Smith's squad allowed 23.4 points and 337.8 yards per game, ranking in the bottom half of the league in both categories. However, there are reasons to be moderately hopeful. Linebacker Brian Urlacher(notes) will return from the wrist injury that cost him nearly all of 2009, and Pro Bowler Lance Briggs(notes) is still in the team picture. The Bears also signed Julius Peppers(notes) to a massive deal in the offseason, and they reacquired Chris Harris(notes) (the DB, not the fantasy expert) via trade in April. These players are all IDPs of interest, as is safety Danieal Manning(notes). Chicago's team defense deserves a look in fantasy leagues, but understand that the NFC North is loaded with offensive firepower, and the Cowboys, Eagles and Giants are on the schedule, too.
And that's a wrap, gamers. This was the most difficult JI of all. If you believe the 2010 Bears deserve a more optimistic spin, then by all means give it to us in comments. Or let's just share some Noah Jackson memories. The floor is now yours…
Photo via AP Images
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|Message view
|« Date » · « Thread »
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|"Pinaki Poddar" <ppod...@bea.com>
|Proposal for a 'contrib' space in openjpa repository
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|View raw message


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- Fours
- Sixes
- Wickets
- AN Cook 30
- IR Bell 91
- IJL Trott 43
- JE Root 12
- EJG Morgan 8
- RS Bopara 46*
- JC Buttler 1
- TT Bresnan 19*
- MA Starc 1/75
- MG Johnson 0/44
- CJ McKay 2/38
- SR Watson 1/26
- JP Faulkner 2/48
- AC Voges 0/13
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Johnson to Cook, no run, in the channel outside off, better first ball from this Mitch, Cook leaves
Johnson to Cook, no run, slightly overpitched, again a little leg side, shovelled towards backward square
Johnson to Cook, no run, fullish and shaping nicely around off stump, gets across and shows it the face in defence
Johnson to Cook, no run, full and holding its line on off stump, again Cook gets his bat down in time
Johnson to Cook, no run, lovely delivery from Johnson, angled in on a testing length and nipping away as Cook prods at it and is beaten
Johnson to Cook, 1 run, back of a length and wide, opens the arms and cracks a cut shot down to third man for a single to deny Mitch a maiden
Johnson to Cook, no run, full and wide and beats Cook driving, it swung a touch though it was probably one to be leaving at this stage, even in one-day mode
Johnson to Cook, no run, cracked off the back foot towards point, plenty of power on the shot but David Warner makes a customarily smart stop
Johnson to Cook, 2 runs, Cook gets forward and clips firmly off his front pad through midwicket, touch too full and straight again from Johnson
Johnson to Cook, 1 run, pitched up a foot or so outside off, Cook chops down on it and the ball squirts through midwicket
Johnson to Bell, 1 run, sharp bouncer from Johnson, he's working up decent pace and this gets big on Bell, who thrusts his hands at it and does well to keep it down towards gully
Johnson to Cook, no run, pitched up outside the line of off, textbook front-foot drive from Cook but he picks mid-off
Johnson to Cook, no run, back of a length, outside off and flayed off the back foot, picks out point though
Johnson to Cook, no run, tighter line and blocked into the leg side
Johnson to Cook, 2 runs, full, veering towards leg stump, glanced in front of square by Cook and the back on the boundary covers good ground to prevent a boundary
Johnson to Cook, 1 leg bye, again that low, slingy action sends the ball tailing towards leg, misses with a clip this time and it rolls away off the pad
Johnson to Bell, no run, fired across on a good length, going on with the arm, Bell lets it through
Johnson to Bell, no run, pitched up around middle and off, Bell taps respectfully back down the pitch
Johnson to Bell, no run, that's an excellent line from Johnson to Bell, speared across and lifting sharply, the batsman has his off stump covered but is drawn into a bit of a flirt anyway
Johnson to Bell, 1 leg bye, straighter, attempts to tuck off his pads but doesn't get any bat on it
Johnson to Cook, FOUR, Johnson gets the boundary treatment now, full and wide of the stumps, the ball isn't doing anything threatening through the air or off the pitch and Cook confidently punches another four through the covers
Johnson to Cook, 1 run, gets across and tucks one through square leg
Johnson to Bell, 1 run, another well-directed bumper, Bell jerks his bat up in front of his face and the ball flies off the handle in the air through backward square leg
Johnson to Cook, 2 runs, slung down around leg stump, Cook waits on it and squirrels another couple behind square on the leg side
Johnson to Trott, no run, full at off stump, defended back to Johnson
Johnson to Trott, 1 run, tucked through his favourite area at midwicket from outside off
Johnson to Bell, 1 run, full outside off, driven out to deep cover
Johnson to Trott, 1 run, worked from the off stump through the leg side again...tick, tick, tick by this pair
Johnson to Bell, no run, outside off, angled across Bell who leaves alone...goes on the second bounce to Wade
Johnson to Bell, 1 run, dropped in short, Bell hops back and pulls firmly in front of square
Johnson to Bell, FOUR, some aggression from Bell as he drives a full, wide delivery over the top of backward point and he places it well enough to beat the boundary sweeper
Johnson to Bell, no run, a spanking drive from Bell but it rockets straight to cover
Johnson to Bell, no run, full and wide, going across Bell who chases it with out off drive but doesn't make contact
Johnson to Bell, no run, he's feeding Bell's off-side strokes at the moment but he again picks out backward point
Johnson to Bell, 1 run, a short ball that sits in the surface and Bell pulls it down to towards fine leg
Johnson to Trott, no run, played out to backward point
Johnson to Bell, FOUR, short ball and Bell top edges his pull straight over the wicketkeeper...extra pace did for Bell, but the end result good for England
Johnson to Bell, 1 run, looks as though he's trying to push on now, a low full toss, slower ball, outside off and the bottom hand comes off the bat as he drives to drive...gets a single through square
Johnson to Trott, 1 run, placed through the off side
Johnson to Bell, 1 run, short again, Bell is more comfortable with this one as he pulls in front of square
Johnson to Trott, 2 runs, good placement and good running...Trott worked this from outside off through fine leg and quickly spotted the chance for a second. It was tight, but he was well back in the end
Johnson to Trott, 1 run, more swift running, pushed towards mid-off and he scampers...10 from the over
Johnson to Bresnan, 1 run, goes for the yorker wide of the stumps, Bresnan manages to work it away for a single through cover
Johnson to Bopara, 2 runs, slices this high, high into the off side, Bopara done by the slower ball as he tried to cart it back down the ground, it swirled above Bailey in the covers, he didn't get under it and then failed to get a finger on the attempted catch too!
Johnson to Bopara, 1 run, fired across and Bopara swings hard, gets a toe end past Wade
Johnson to Bresnan, 1 wide, sprayed very wide this time, as Bresnan stepped away - this one's called
Johnson to Bresnan, 1 leg bye, dug in short, the batsman swings across the line and misses, hits the body and runs away behind square - these two have put on fifty in quick time
Johnson to Bopara, FOUR, makes a calculated step across his stumps, Johnson pitches it up outside off and this is right under Bopara's nose, he middles it, smacked low straight back down the ground and it beats the diving long-off for another boundary
Johnson to Bopara, 1 run, length ball, swung hard through midwicket but he picks out the the man in the deep and it's just a single to end a handy little cameo from Bopara and the innings with England 269 for 6