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By Jerry O'Brien 5-15–16 Proctor, MN
Cold, wet weather stopped all of the area tracks to cancel racing on the weekend
of May 14th except the Proctor Speedway. A good field of 81 cars braved the cool
Sunday evening that held a hint of possible precipitation. Officials hustled the
show along with the first qualifying heat circling the track at 6:55 and the final
checkered flag flew at 8:34.
The Midwest Modifieds were the first of six WISSOTA Sanctioned divisions to
take to the speedway for their 15 lap main event. Outside pole sitter Norman
"Junior" Anderson grabbed the point at the green flag and led in the early going
over Josh Heavirland, Marcus Dunbar, Deven VanHouse, and Ross Siiter.
Unfortunately Anderson lost control in turn two and spun out of the lead. The
incident left the lead to Heavirland at the restart followed by VanHouse, Dunbar,
Dan Kingsley and Willie Thompson for the next couple of laps until newcomer
Rich Bohlman who cme from Tioga, ND, spun off the top of the treacherous turn
four bringing what would prove to be the only other caution flag of the event.
Defending track champion VanHouse got the jump on Heavirland at the green
with Kingdley, Mike Blevins in his first run of the season in the #10 Mid Mod and
Dunbar in close attendance in the top five. VanHouse pulled away for the
convincing victory over Heavirland and Kingsley while John Kallas raced up from
the inside of row seven to finish fourth ahead of Dunbar. It was the first win of the
season for VanHouse in defence of his title. He also turned the fastest lap of the
race on lap 10 with a circuit timed at 18.601 seconds at an average of 72.6 mph.
Next up were the WISSOTA Super Stocks starting 15 cars set to go 20 laps.
Kevin Salin dived into the first turn in the lead from the pole but Kevin Burdick
used the high groove to sail around him an dake a lead off the second turn that he
would never relinquish. Other drivers had plenty of chances to wrest the lead away
from him as five caution flags kept the competition close to the front. Salin held
on to second as Keith Koski, Jeff Klopstein, Jr; Defending track champion Scott
Lawrence and Nick Oreskovich chased after the leaders. Pat Heikkinen spun off
the track in turn three and Dustin Follett, who is trying his hand at Super Stock
racing, also went off turn three. The caution was hung on Heikkinen who was sent
to the rear. Burdick held sway at the front at the restart but behind him positions
changes as Klopstein snared second, Salin was third, Koski fourth and Lawrence
fifth. The second yellow flag fflew when Willie Johnsen, Jr stopped at the top of
turn two. The third caution flag flew on the restart when Follett got caught by the
"accordion effect" as a slow starting line caused cars to rear end each other and
spun on the front stretch. Burdick fended off the pack on the green flag Klopstein,
Oreskovich, Lawrence and Salin followed. Heikkinen appeared in sixth after being
sent to the rear. Caution number four occurred when Adam Shinn spun in turn
two. All of these caution flags happened within the first six laps and Burdick was
able to maintain his lead throughout all of the trouble behind him. This time the
order behind him Oreskovich, Lawrence, Klopstein, Salin and Heikkinen ranin the
top six. Heikkinen slipped into fifth and, at the halfway point, Burdick,
Oreskovich, Lawrence, Klopstein and Heikkinen ran in the top five and DJ Keeler,
Salin, Koski, Ronnie Malecki and rookie Tyler Vernon rounded out the top ten.
The fifth and final caution flag flew just past the mid point with nine remaining
when Follett once again spun and was out of competition for causing two caution
flags spinning on his own twice. Burdick was equal to the task holding onto the
lead one more time as he went on to take his first feature of the season.
Oreskovich, Lawrence and Klopstein were joined in the top five by Keeler.
Fourteen of fifteen starters finished with only Follett not running at the end.
Burdick showed speed throughout the event turning a fast lap of 18.341 seconds
for a average of 73.6 mph on lap five.
It was allso 20 laps for the WISSOTA Modifieds and Neil Balduc took
advantage of the the outside line to take the lead at the outset followed by Bob
Broking, Paul Wrazidlo, Johnny Broking and Darrell Nelson. The only caution
flag of the event came early on when Paul Niznik got turned around in turn two.
Bob Broking held onto the lead at the green light with Balduc, Wrazidlo, Johnny
Broking, Andy Jones and Nelson chasing him. Balduc took back the lead, the Bob
Broking regained the point as the two raced side by side for several circuits before
Bob Broking was able to gaon the advantage. At the halfway mark Bob broking
led Balduc, Johnny Broking, Nelson, Deven VanHouse Kevin Eder, Jones, Niznik,
Jody Bellefeuille and Danny Vang in the top ten. The race went non stopped the
rest of the way with Bob Broking fending off all comers for the win, his first in
some time at the speedway. Balduc, Nelson, Johnny Broking and defending track
Modified champ VanHouse rounded out the top five. Wrazidlo was a DNF but set
the fastest lap of the event at 18.77 seconds on lap three for an average of 71.9
Next the high powered WISSOTA Late Models rolled out for their 25 lap
feature with Scott Herrick and Tim McMann leading the way. McMann grabbed
the lead from the outside over Herrick while Jeff Massingill moved up from row
three to third. Massingill wasted little time disposing of McMann as Aaron lillo
moved to third ahead of Darrell Nelson and Harry Hanson. Massingill appeared to
be unmatchable as he sailed off to a stout lead leaving the rest to race for second.
Nelson moved into second and Aaron Lillo spent a couple laps in second. The race
quickly settled into single file behind Massingill with Nelson, Aaron Lillo,
McMann, Hanson, Jay Kintner, Terry Lillo, Herrick, Todd Gehl, Josh Johnson and
Robbie Cooper on station. The first caution flag flew for a josh Johnson spin in
turn four with ten laps down. On the restart Johnson again spun earning himself a
trip to the pits and out of competition. Massingill was untouchable and led Nelson,
Aaron lillo, Hanson and McMann in the top five. Herrick, Kintner, Terry Lillo,
Gehl and Cooper ran in the top ten. As Massingill clung to the lead, Nelson began
to feel some pressure from Hanson. Massingill continued to be in control as the
laps wore away, but the second place skirmish heated up as Hanson went to the
high side and made a run at Nelson. A couple of tries to pass fell short before
hanson was able to make the pass on the back stretch. Massingill led them all over
Hanson, Nelson, Aaron Lillo and McMann in the top five. Not surprisingly,
Massingill also turned the fastest lap of the event at 18.083 seconds at an average
of 74.7 mph.
Devin Reynolds grabbed the Pure Stock lead from the pole as they embarked
on a 15 lap main event. Reynolds held onto the point for the first five laps before
giving way to Mike Blevins just past the mid point of the event. At this point the
first of two caution flags occurred when Andy Poll made contact with Dustin
Follett spinning him in turn four. The restart came with eight laps complete and
three laps later caution flag number two flew when Follett spun on his own in turn
three. Blevins raced away to a huge lead on the restart while Brandle Pupp in his
first race of the season, moved to second only to give way to Al Rapp at the
checkered flag. It was a sweep for Blevins, his second straight of the season.
David Beckwith of Duluth swept the Hornet action for the second straight week
as he passed early leader Don Popoe of Superior. One caution flag slowed the 10
lap event but Beckwith was able to maintain the lead for the win.
Race Results Proctor Speedway 5-15-16
WISSOTA Late Model (11 cars)
Feature (25 laps)
Jeff Massingill Keewatin; Harry Hanson Eveleth; Darrell Nelson Hermantown;
Aaron Lillo Proctor; Tim McMann Duluth; Terry Lillo Duluth; Jay Kintner
Hibbing; Scott Herrick Proctor; Todd Gehl Solon Springs; Robbie Cooper South
Range DNF" Josh Johnson Superior
Heat 1: A. Lillo; Kintner; Gehl; Herrick; Cooper; Johnson
Heat 2; McMann; Nelson; Massingill; Hanson; T. Lillo
WISSOTA Modified (16 cars)
Feature (20 laps)
Bob Broking Grand Rapids; Neil Balduc Bessemer; Darrell Nelson Hermantown;
Deven VanHouse Silver Bay; Kevin Eder Ashland; Jody Bellefeuille Duluth;
Andy Jones Princeton; Paul Niznik Medford; E. J. Heitala Cloquet; Scott
Heikkinen Eveleth; Jeffrey Wood Chisholm; 47 Danny vang Ironton DNF: Paul
Wrazidlo Duluth; Brian Mikkonen Iron River DNS: Nick Musel Duluth
Heat 1; Nelson; J. Broking; B. Broking; Bellefeuille; VanHouse; Wood DNF:
Mikkonen DNS: vang
Heat 2: Balduc; Jones; Eder; Wrazidlo; Niznik; Heitala; Heikkinen DNF" Musel
WISSOTA Super Stock (15 cars)
Feature (20 laps)
Kevin Burdick Proctor; Nick Oreskovich Mason; Scott Lawrence Superior; Jeff
Klopstein, Jr Tomahawk; DJ Keeler Superior; Willie Johnsen, Jr Superior; Pat
Heikkinen Eveleth; Keith Koski Hibbing; Ronnie Malecki Superior; Colton
Vernon; Kevin Salin Iron; Wayne Dale Biwabik; Brian Carl duluth; Adam Shinn
Duluth DNF: Dustin Follett Cloquet
heat 1; Oreskovich; Heikkinen; Burdick; Johnsen, Jr; Malecki; Follett
Heat 2: Lawrence; Klopstein, Jr; Dale; Koski; Keeler; Vernon DNF: Shinn
WISSOTA Midwest Modified (16 cars)
Feature (15 laps)
Deven VanHouse; Josh Heavirland Cloquet; Dan Kingsley Superior; John Kallas
Hurley; Marcus Dunbar Marenisco; Mike Blevins Hibbing; Donnie Lofdahl
Duluth; Willy Thompson Hibbing; Junior Anderson Duluth; Dan Doran
Hermantown; Craig Lofdahl Duluth; Rich Bohlman Tioga, ND DNF: Ross Siiter
Duluth; Matt Deragon Ashland DNS: Gunner Peterson Drummond; Jeremy
Lindquist Ashland
Heat 1: Kingsley; VanHouse; Lofdahl; Blevins; Kallas DNF: Lindquist
Heat 2; Thompson; Heavirland; Anderson; Siiter; Doran; Bohlman DNF: Peterson;
WISSOTA Pure Stock (16 cars)
Feature (15 laps)
Mike Blevins Hibbing; Al Rapp Saginaw; Brandle Pupp Ashland; Justin
Weinberger Park Falls; Annika Hammitt Cloquet; Devin Reynolds Cloquet; Andy
Poll Two Harbors; Dylan Shelton; Matt Cunha Andrew Hanson Iron River; Carter
Nelson Hermantown DNF: Jon Hammitt Cloquet; Josh Loucks Carlton; Dustin
Follett Cloquet; Jason Simonson Superior; Tyler Carlson Cloquet
Heat 1: Follett; Reynolds; Shelton; Poll; Simonson; Hanson; Nelson; Carlson
Heat 2: Blevins; Rapp; J. Hammitt; Pupp; Loucks; Weinberger; A.Hammitt;
WISSOTA Hornets (7 cars)
Feature (10 laps)
David Beckwith Duluth; Don Popoe Superior; Kaleb Dallmann Brookston; Logan
Hapy St Paul; Aaron Bernick Duluth DNF: Ken Hapy Duluth; Ryan Lind Cloquet
Heat: Beckwith; Popoe; K. Hapy; L. Hapy; Dallmann; Lind; Bernick


text:
I am working for my husband's release from Corporate America. He works and lives in Arlington, Virginia during the week (near Washington, D.C.), and every Friday at 7PM, he drives five hours south to our small family farm in Graham, North Carolina.
I enjoy the honeymoon benefit of his weekend visits, but I want him home full-time.
A year after being laid off at Microsoft, I landed a contract job writing Army proposals and that work is ending. I plan to aim high. I don't want to earn only enough writing income to replace my own corporate salary -- I want to earn enough so that my husband can stay home and tend our vineyard, too. (See DivinityVines.com)
Ours is a very bootstrap operation -- we (he, mostly) do the work ourselves, and we'll harvest our first crop of grapes this fall.
Let's see -- a goal is supposed to have a target date...
OK, then, shooting in the dark (assuredly not the scientific way to set a goal), I'd like to be earning 200K writing and speaking by my birthday, October 1, 2011.
Ouch. Maybe that's not a goal. That sounds more like wishful thinking. Well, I'll put some numbers behind it and, if I can't stomach shooting that high, I will revise my target income downward.
Here's to your own target practice as you aim to make the income you need to work for yourself full-time. (See How to Make Money While You Look for a Job)
Donna D. Buskirk
One American Writer

subset: commoncrawl


text:
= Access Restricted
Habitat for Humanity
ICBA and Habitat for Humanity International formed a national alliance in May 2004, strengthening the common goal between ICBA and Habitat to help provide affordable, dignified housing for every family possible.
The ICBA-Habitat for Humanity International alliance establishes ICBA National Build Day, an event in which community bank leaders and staff will spend a day working on local Habitat for Humanity construction projects.
ICBA will also help raise donations to support the construction of affordable housing at the national level through the newly created Independent Community Bankers of America Fund.


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I've told you son, Isiah is a good player's coach. If you noticed anything, the players seem happy with Isiah, way better than they did with Dick Chaney, Lenny Wilkins, Herb Williams and Larry Brown. Isiah doesn't know how to coach the x and o's. I said Isiah isn't a BAD COACH, he isn't a good coach either. Don't get it twisted, you can't twist my words because I don't pull logic out of my ass like you. I stay on point and consistant. I want the best for my team, and Isiah cannot provide that.
Guy, I've told you, I feel like I'm repeating myself because how you replied didn't say anything. You already said Dirk is "learning" how to rebound". I told you he isn't a banger, but he still manages to get 9 rebounds a game. Dirk rebounds well enough, definately better than Curry, when Curry is always in the paint. I'm not gonna fault Curry though, his rebounding has improved. To say "Dirk is learning how to rebound" makes no sense, and you said again too which is the irony of this. You're going no where with this, you just came out of no where about Dirk's rebounding, when he's top 10 in the NBA every year in rebounding.
Listen, Phoneix just became a good team(Thanks to Thomas), they haven't been around like Dallas or San Antonio. They turned very quickly and advanced to the WCF without Amare. Who knows what they can with Amare now. Its offense, not offence. Amare is a productive half court player, they didn't have Amare last season and it hurt their half court offense.
"We have guards that dribble way too much." Yeh, Isiah acquired those guards. Even when Curry gets quick passes in the post, when he's doubled team he usually always turns it over with an offensive foul or traveling. Curry has been in the league for over 5 years. He's great offensively, he's always been good offensively, but he still can't improve on his flaws of turnovers, defense, and getting beat by his opponents on the boards.
This is possibly the most ignorant thing I ever read on here.
Where did I say I excited about the Marbury trade? You made such an asshead suggestion and guest, its accually the total opposite. I told alot of people Marbury won't save New York, and that Phoneix traded him because he isn't a winning player, and they felt he couldn't be the PG to lead their talented youth.
Ewing, Spreewell and Houston are some of the most respected Knicks in our era, Francis, Marbury and Curry have accomplished nothing in New York. Don't even put those names in the same sentence. You won't make your points like that. We all realize how superior Spree, h20 and Ewing were are compared to the scrubs we have now. Again, you're not being smart.
EXCUSE ME EVERYONE, dr.carpy has officially declared because Curry and Crawford have scored 20 points each against Portland, they should be the face of the New York Knicks franchise for the next 10 years.
It seems like you're always calling out Knick fans, calling us fickle, impatient fans. Sorry if we're not attached to Isiah as you.
Heh, you almost feel stupid asking that question too. Thats how I feel replying, I didn't know 31 year old bench scrubs had trade value.
Hey guys, if you think people like me, Paris, and Sparks are too "negative", then prove us wrong. Prove to us Isiah's moves are helping the Knicks now, and in the future. Good basketball means protecting the ball and not turning it over. Knicks have very few good basketball players. We are fans who have grown tired of Isiah Thomas and the current direction of the team and believe a number of our players should be moved because they are part of the reason we are doing poorly. We accually play hard at somne nights, and our losses have result from mistakes on the basketball court. Turnovers and confusion on defense result in losses. Cap space helps the rebuilding process, look how it helped Denver, Orlando, Chicago, Phoneix and many others. Isiah's direction is far from rebuilding, especially in the first year and half. People say he's rebuilding, but why he did he trade cap space and Trevor Ariza for Francis? He has no direction people.
once again the knicks salary is not as bad as ppl think, the knicks dont have much contracts after 2009, and i like what isiah has done wit this team, all i gotta say the knicks had players who are not in the league todayb4 isiah(eisley, houston, sprewell, weatherspoon, travis knight, spencer, shandon anderson, well i think i proved my point)
hey metrocard i think that isiah's moves are good because, uh, marbury and francis were good once, and i uh heard their names a lot so now theyre going to be ten times better than before because theyre motivated! And james was uh on the globetrotters, so that means that uh he knows what he's doing...and it doesnt matter what our cap space is because we dont need to sign anyone; our team is perfect!
(note: a certain degree of sarcasm was used in the above post.)
lol dude, did you call me "Sparks"??? I think someone should create a thread to just end them all. Like a "post your formula to fix Knicks here" thread. That way we can see where everybody stands, and who actually can come up with a plan that can fix the team in 2-3 years (cause it aint happenin this season guys, sorry)
I get a headache just htinking about where to start, if i was Thomas. He's a clown as an executive, but the guy's gutsy. gotta give Zeke that. If I was in his shoes I would have fled the country and hide for a decade months ago. lol I mean, even my little sister knows the guy is the biggest joke of NYC.
you post like your age, (18 I think). Some doesn't agree with you and it's instant profanity like "asshead" (brilliant!). How did you arrive at me comparing Amare and Eddy Curry. I said most big men need time to figure things out. Shaq when he was young took tons of travelling calls. In time he figured things out. Good players need to play and learn. Eddy Curry is a good player. He needs time, but according to you he should be shipped. What's ingnorant is saying Curry is useless, only to watch him drop 27 and 10 (18 and 7 for the season). Who would you rather have at centre? Better yet why don't you outline YOUR unique plan for the Knicks. I read all these foolish comments of what should have been done. Constant bitching and moaning. PLEASE SPELL OUT YOUR PLAN. Educate us with your limited widsom.
I said Isiah isn't a BAD COACH, he isn't a good coach either
What the hell does that even mean? Have the balls too pick a side, then defend it.
To blame Isiah for the guard play is ridiculous. You, or anyone else who thinks he responsible for the on court decisions made? That as foolish as saying that if stole a candy bar, my mother is responsible. If everyone took personal responsiblity for themselves, things would be a lot better for our team and in the world in general.
And with Dirk, he got shut down by Udonis Haslem in the NBA Finals! What does that say? He leaves all the defense to his teammates, which isn't really fair. He should be fighting for boards and contributing on both ends of the floor. That's what good teammates do.
EXCUSE ME EVERYONE, dr.carpy has officially declared because Curry and Crawford have scored 20 points each against Portland, they should be the face of the New York Knicks franchise for the next 10 years.
If that's what you read you an Idiot plain and simple. To call both Crawford and Curry useless shows you're an Idiot that chain smokes crack. Both guys are pretty unique players that have exceptional skills.
the use of words to express something other than and especially the opposite of the literal meaning
Now that you know the meaning (because clearly you didn't before) use only when it fits. Nothing I posted before would be considered "Irony" or "Ironic" quit trying to rock terms to sound smart. It's annoying. Fans like you are looking for someone to pull out a magic wand and fix everything. This again is not realistic. Deus Ex Machina or God in the Machine is going down here anytime soon. You want a quick fix, go watch a sitcom. They usually have a solution in less than 30 mins.
P.S. Save the spell check for yourself. You only see the flaws in others, none in yourself. That is your biggest weakness. Stop telling everyone how to think. You're a kid. And you definetely don't have all the answers.
I've already stated what the Knicks can do. Read my post more clearly. Only make trades that can help us get under the cap space under 2008, or trades for additional draft picks. Trading expiring contracts over and over has proven to fail.
dr.carpy, what things? You can mean anything by that, explain yourself. Shaq still gets called for traveling when he plays, why do you think he averages 3 turnovers a game? Eddy Curry has been in the NBA for 6 years. He has had his time in the NBA. He's been in the league for a while. Amare, Shaq, Duncan are Franchise players. Curry isn't a Franchise player, he's a good player, but not a franchise player. Comparing Curry with elite big men doesn't prove your agruement. Curry can dominant games if he puts as much effort on offense as he does on defense. He is a good talent, no one has questioned that. But he still suffers from the same flaws he had in Chicago. Thats why Chicago let Curry go. They felt his flaws couldn't be fixed. That is a fact.
Why are you getting angry now? Don't worry about my balls. I've said this before and many times in the forum. I'll repeat for you. Isiah Thomas is a good players coach, the Knicks players seem to be happy with Isiah. But there is no denying Isiah is a terrible x and o's Coach. Our defense has looked worse under Isiah, and we average 17 turnovers a game. The team is confused on both sides on the ball. It confuses me also. Isiah was a champion in Detroit. I don't understand why he doesn't look back on the Detroit team from the past and try to use that as a sense of direction.
Isiah is the coach for a reason, guys like Pop and Sloan train their players to be prepared every game to defend and play their hardest, if they don't, they lose minutes. Carlos Arroyo would be in Utah right now, but he didn't play defense hard enough. Sloan demanded to trade Arroyo, and he got traded for nothing. Isiah doesn't prepare this team well enough to win every night. This why he isn't fit to be the coach of this team now and in the future. When Isiah left IND, they vastly improved, and even won 60 games in a season. Isiah is still at fault, he's the GM TOO. He traded for those players. If they're not producing, he has failed as a GM, which is something we've witness repeatedly. I can't spell out a plan, I know I can explain it to you, but I understand how I would spell out a plan unless I d o t h i s. Try to make more sense, or choose to type in English.
Hey kid, what does Haslem's defense have to do with "Dirk "learning" how to rebound""? You lost this agruement once again. The more you reply to this, the more off topic you go away from what you said earlier. Dirk knows HOW to rebound. I've said he isn't a banger, thats very obvious. But you need to know how to rebound to be top 10 in the NBA every year in rebounding. You don't average 9-10 rebounds a game without knowing how to rebound. You were wrong on that statement. Plus, Dirk averaged like 12 rebounds in the Finals and out rebounded Haslem. You make no sense really.
"You an idiot?" Cavemen are Knick fans now? Speak English. If you want to prove your theory correct, calling me an idiot would make you look inferior, ignorant and intelligent. I don't want you to do that to yourself now.
I smoke crack? LOL Is that your comeback? I guess thats your way of saying "I can't prove your points wrong and I co-sign with them, I so I'll call you a crackhead." People here talk about personal insults, I got this guy calling me an idiot and a crackhead. This is my thread, and it will be no personal attacks. I'm too intelligent to lower myself to your level and reply back with an insult. Keep the crackhead/idiot talk out of here, thanks.
Everyone in the NBA are "unique players that have exceptional skills", thats why they're in the NBA. You proved nothing to the agruement here though. You spent more time talking about me smoking crack than talking about Crawford and Curry. Lets discuss basketball and not drugs, okay? Crawford and Curry are not franchise players. They're 3rd and 2nd options who don't play defense and are turnover prone. Yes, they're unique offensive talented, and very excited to watch them when they're hot. They're both great kids too, none of them are trouble makers and they present themselves well on the MSG channel. These aren't the guys you want leading your franchise. They've proved in Chicago they can't win games, and they're proving in New York they can't carry the team to W's.
I never knew 18 year old's were "kids". You're presenting yourself like a child with your insults, lack of explaining your theories, and you show alot of frustration on the computer. I'm a working proud college student, a Freshman yes. I have alot of learn in life, and I know that. I got my report record, and I got a 3.5 GPA, but I feel theres always room for improvement. I go to college and work for my family and my self. I want to keep them proud. I'm far from a kid, you shouldn't look down on me because I'm younger than you. I never said I had all the answers, why are you assuming things now? You're that frustrated? I just asked you kindly to explain and proved your points, you failed. Don't get mad at me over it, and especially don't get frustrated and troll with negative personal attacks on me. I'm open to discuss basketball with you, even if your theories are distant from reality as it gets, but when you start saying I smoke crack, you take the lost.
Sorry, I had to post that, I love to joke. If you didn't see the video..check in the Hangout section I posted.
I'm still waiting on reading your plan to fix the Knicks. Do you have one or are we going to read more pointless posts?
Metro you aspire to be me. I WENT to College. I have an English minor. I know without the shadow of a doubt that I'm far more intelligent than you. I started correcting you and now you do it with every minor mistake I make. I work on 24 hr call. AS THE HEAD OF MY DEPARTMENT, I make decisions whether it be 1 PM or 1 AM. Yeah, sometimes I respond and I'm tired. What's your excuse? I could really care less what you think of me simply cause you are inconsequential. In idot speak, you simply don't matter. The fact that you assume that you do, is well pathetic and laughable. I pay more in taxes, than you probably made last year. I have a wife, a department to run, a network to facillitate, family, and friends. Where in that equation do you think you fit in? GET OVER YOURSELF. You probably don't matter anywhere else, so why would you matter to me? By the way, I think it's cute you still write your responses in the same format when I first told you off. They say copying is the sincerest form of flattery (I know it's really Imitation, but this is the same thing right?). Everyone is happy you got a computer loaded with Adobe Photoshop for Christmas. However, your plan like the Don said is still not outlined. Quit the bull**** blah blah blahing and commit to a strategy for the team. So far all I've read is trade everyone. That's obviously not feaseable (that's possible in idiot speak, just so you can follow along to). I don't photoshop lame little banners to show I have marginal intelligence (apparently you do). Dirk is a terrible situational rebounder. In this sense, he is still learning. His career average is 8.6. David Lee has grabbed bigger rebounds in clutch situations. THAT'S WHY HE STILL LEARNING (MY OPINION JACKASS.) Ask Kenny Smith, he'll say the samething too. He said that after tonight's game where Josh Howard grabbed 11, while Dirk grabbed 7. Good thing I said it first.
What do turnovers have to do with defense? Turnovers are an offensive problem. Defense happens when you don't have the ball. Turnovers happen from a lack of concentration. Isiah has no control in this area. Only the players do. Make them take responsibilites for THEIR mistakes.
If you want to prove your theory correct, calling me an idiot would make you look inferior, ignorant and intelligent
the word is UNintelligent. But subliminally you wrote intelligent, cause it's true.
18 yr olds can vote, but they can't drink. That privilege is strictly for adults.
My self is myself. Most people that speak English know that it's one word, not two.
I'm a working proud college student, a Freshman yes. I have alot of learn in life, and I know that. I got my report record, and I got a 3.5 GPA, but I feel theres always room for improvement. I go to college and work for my family and my self. I want to keep them proud. I'm far from a kid, you shouldn't look down on me because I'm younger than you. I never said I had all the answers, why are you assuming things now?
When I read this part I got misty. I heard violins, and I felt horrible....I really didn't. You write rude responses. So when those rude responses are returned in kind, you resort to this? Read you responses, anyone who sees things differently than you is an idiot. I don't look down on you. I just hate your rude responses. Speak to others with respect, most normal people enjoy that.
Again, say something relevant or say nothing. I know your going to crack and say, I have no job. In advance...that's so original! I can post my credentials. Can you?
Last edited by dr.carpy; Jan 05, 2007 at 04:22.
You're right with Dirk's rebounding skills. A couple of years ago one of the greatest rebounders to play the game who goes by the name of Charles Barkley spoke on Dirk's rebounding. He said that he gets "garbage" rebounds and his numbers on deflate how soft he really is. He called him a powderpuff lol. And it's true...watch the games you'll see him get the rebounds after everyone is trying to get back on D since the Dallas is known for their full-court offense. Another thing you should tally are offensive rebounds. These are the harder rebounds to get because you usually have to be physical and fight for these boards...Out of 9.5 rebounds a game, he only averages 1.5 offensive rebounds a game. That's horrible for someone who is supposed to average a double-double a game (Even though he's technically never averaged a double double). It also helps to be a somewhat athletic 7 footer. So he's going to get rebounds naturally like that but most of them are still garbage rebounds. He's soft, can't bang with the big guys and charles barkley said it best...powderpuff lol. Garbage rebounds folks garbage rebounds...
Right...you're far more intelligent than me? You have an English minor, but you fail to type simple words correctly. I'm not trying to bust your chops here, but you're trying too hard. I notice your self esteem is low when you debate with me, and you have to look for insults to make you feel you holding a debate now. Like I said I'm not going to insult you, I'm better than that. Theres no need to lower myself to your classless level. I don't know what "In idot speak" means, but I guess its you trying too hard to get me frustrated. Its not going to work, I don't get frustrated on the computer. You could try and try, but you'll end up losing wasted your time and getting frustrated over nothing. Its nice you have all these things in your life, but yet you still seem unhappy and display alot of anger here. I could type alot of bull**** about myself, ALOT. But that'll be a waste of time. I don't need to prove myself to someone as low as you.
Like I said, you failed to explain how Dirk is still "learning" how to rebound. You must know how to grab a rebound in order to average 8.6 rebounds for your career. Dirk has been averaging over 9 rebounds a game as a super star. Dirk doesn't play around the paint, thats why his offensive rebounding numbers are low. I said, and I TOLD YOU, Dirk isn't a banger. This is obvious. Everyone in the world knows this. There is no such thing as "Garbage" rebounds. Every rebound counts and is important. The ball just doesn't fall to you. You need to be in the right situation and be alert of the ball. You make it sound like anybody can average 8.6 rebounds for their career. BTW, David Lee is one of the best rebounders in the NBA, comparing him to Dirk to make Dirk look like a bad rebounder doesn't prove your agruement at all. Accually thats weak on your part. A bad rebounder is Tim Thomas.
The 1 and Only, 10 rebs a game is great, but 9 rebs a game isn't bad at all. Its Dirk's fault for grabbing defensive rebounds now? You're telling me that the opposing team doesn't fight for the rebound and they just let Dirk grab it, you think its that easy huh? Honestly, we know Dirk isn't an offensive rebounding machine, this so repeated. That isn't what the AGRUEMENT is about. The guy said Dirk is "learning" how to rebound, when he has had the same rebounding numbers the last 4-5 years. Dirk always been the same rebounder, nothing changed, he knows what he can bring to the team. Why do you think Dallas signed Dampier and Diop? They needed offensive rebounders, Dirk doesn't play around the paint, they needed bodies in the paint.
dr.carpy, what do turnovers have to do with defense? A couple of things accually. When you turn the ball over, your team has to defend more possesions. Why make the defense work harder, especially knowing our defense is already weak.
Hey, everyone dr. carpy finally put together a well written sentence and made a point(a point that co-signs with my idea and helps my agruement). Yes my little friend, Turnovers happen from a lack of concentration. Lack of concentration happends from lack of discipline, repition. Isiah obviously doesn't repeat his method enough to his plays. So when they're on the court, they're not focused enough. If you watch Jazz, Dallas, Laker or San Antonio games, you notice all the guys are on the same page. They excute the plays and communicate well with each other. Our offense? Its alot of one on one, isolation, no assisting, turnover by turnover. The way we win games is by hoping the other team has a bad shooting night. I don't want the Knicks to play like that. I want to play hard defense every night, grind it out(they're capable of doing this), and playing smart basketball. Stop the turnovers and capitalized on double teams. Eddy Curry could average 2 assist a game if he wanted, and only average 2 turnovers a game. Instead he forces things. Eddy Curry is dominant offensively when he lets the game come to him. When he has a bad game, its usually because he's forcing everything out there. Turnovers are VERY IMPORTANT, they're the biggest reason this season we've been under .500.
Fine, I made one typo. You're happy now? You know what I meant, and you got the point. You could keep throwing insults at me, you're still going to look ignorant and stupid.
This guy said "18 yr olds can vote, but they can't drink. That privilege is strictly for adults." LOL...what does that have to do with basketball?
I hurt your feelings now? My responses aren't rude, I'm just clearly making points. You're just too stubborn, frustrated and angry to cosign or be reasonable. I co-sign with you when I see a point made in your post, just like in this post. It seems it hurts you when I prove my points and you can't. So I guess you take that as rude. If you want respect from me, you have to earn it. Calling me a crackhead, idiot, etc. Thats not going to work. I respect everyone's views in here equally. I think you need to get over the past, I admit I did clown on you too much in the past and you were probably offended. Nobody is perfect, including myself. That was a mistake by me, but you need to get over it. The 1 and Only and I went at it for a week, but we got over it and realize we're on the same team. Now we discuss reasonable everyday. I'm not even sure you're on the same team. You seem more of a Patrick Ewing fan than a fan of the Blue and Orange Jersey. But thats alright, as long as you support the Knicks, I'm cool with you. Take it easy.
Last edited by metrocard; Jan 05, 2007 at 15:02.


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Ribbed Collar Sweater
Style: 570088736
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A feminine rolled collar adds the chic detail that makes this black sweater so very WHBM.
- Contoured stretch fit.
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House rams through bills to dissolve school districts without transferring employees
After the chair of the House Education Committee referred to school employees as "hogs," Republicans in the state House rammed through legislation late Thursday night that would dissolve the Buena Vista and Inkster school districts and leave employees in those dissolved districts without the right to a job in the receiving districts.
Under House Bill 4813 and House Bill 4815, the state superintendent and state treasurer could decide to dissolve a troubled school district if the district fails to submit a deficit reduction plan or is financially incapable of implementing such a plan; lacks the funds necessary to run a K-12 program for a year of required instructional hours; and has 2,500 students or fewer and lost at least 10 percent of its students over the course of a year.
The legislation is crafted so that only Buena Vista and Inkster qualify for dissolution. Initially, it would have applied to any school district in the state, but MEA successfully fought to have it narrowed.
A dissolved district's students and property would be transferred to one or more nearby districts.
School employees in the dissolved districts would not have rights to jobs in the receiving district — even though their district dissolved through no fault of their own. The legislation initially protected school employees in the dissolved districts by providing them with the right of first refusal for jobs in the receiving district, but an amendment by state Rep. Ray Franz, R-Onekama, stripped away all employee protections.
Franz's amendment was fully supported by House Education Committee Chairwoman Lisa Lyons, R-Alto. In response to school employees' concerns, Lyons said from the House floor: "Pigs get fat — hogs get slaughtered."
State Rep. Stacy Erwin Oakes, D-Saginaw, a former teacher whose district includes Buena Vista, criticized the Republican leadership for rushing the bill without proper examination.
"This isn't something that can be done overnight," she said. "We need to have a sincere conversation on how we arrived at this point."
The Senate is expected to take up the bills next week before leaving for its summer vacation.
Other key elements of the legislation include:
- The intermediate school district overseeing the local district would oversee the dissolution. However, ISDs could recuse themselves from the process, transferring authority to the state.
- The ISD or the state would have to consider the number of students being transferred to another district or districts, including how many of those students receive free or reduced lunch.
- Thanks to lobbying efforts from MEA's Public Affairs team, a receiving school district would not have to count its new students' test scores for three years afterward when determining Adequate Yearly Progress or "top to bottom" calculations.
- Also thanks to MEA, a receiving school district could not use the test scores of students from the dissolved school district as a factor in employee evaluations for three years.


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Five games into her college head coaching career, Jenny Turpel received a harsh reminder of her college basketball playing career.
"I still hate the taste of losing," said Turpel, a Johnsburg graduate who took over in September as the head coach of Harper College in Palatine.
Despite starting 0-5, Turpel is encouraged by the gains her team can make over a season.
"We do have a problem with turning the ball over and rebounding, but those things can be fixed," she said. "I like being on the community college level. I really get to work with players on their skills and put my stamp on things."
During a standout career as a player at NCAA Division II Lewis University, Turpel was a three-time All-Great Lakes Valley Conference selection.
"I had always planned to do something in coaching," the 24-year-old Turpel said.
For the past two years, she has worked as a Harper assistant coach. When previous head coach Nichole Jones resigned in late September, Turpel was chosen as the replacement.
"It's very exciting," Turpel said. "I was fortunate enough to get the job. This is a step in the right direction for my future."
On the sidelines and in practice, Turpel said she leans on her own previous coaches' styles.
"I'm not a yelling type of coach," she said. "I never responded well to those kinds of coaches as a player."
One of Turpel's biggest influences was her coach at Johnsburg, Mike Toussaint, who continues to be a resource, she said. When it comes to drills and running practices, Turpel leaned on her college experience at Lewis.
With nine first-year players on her roster, Turpel has spent plenty of time sharpening her players' skills and has quickly grown to appreciate her surroundings.
"I love Harper," she said. "It's a beautiful campus. I'm blessed to have this opportunity. I hope to take it and run with it."
Soccer standouts: NAIA Judson University women's soccer players Sara Hoffman and Jamie Wimberly were named to the All-Chicagoland Collegiate Athletic Conference second team this fall.
A Huntley grad, Hoffman posted a 0.98 goals-against average this season and posted six shutout victories.
Wimberly, a senior defender who also graduated from Huntley, started all 19 matches on defense this season for Judson (12-5-2), helping the team collect eight total shutouts.
CCAC award winner: Kelsey McFarlane, a senior outside hitter for NAIA Calumet College of St. Joseph, was named second-team All-Chicagoland Collegiate Athletic Conference in women's volleyball.
McFarlane, a Johnsburg grad, led her team and ranked third in the conference with 3.24 kills per set for the Crimson Wave (10-28). She also averaged 2.4 digs per set this season.
Great Lakes recognition: Huntley grad Laura Gaitsch, who started all 17 games women's soccer matches this season as a defender for D-II Lake Erie College, was named to the All-Great Lakes Intercollegiate Athletic Conference's honorable mention team.
The Storm (4-12-1) allowed an average of 1.89 goals per match and had two shutouts. The team lost five times by only one goal this season, including a 1-0 loss to No. 1 Grand Valley State on Nov. 1.
Soccer honoree: Johnsburg grad Natasha Kopystynsky earned a spot this fall on the All-Great South Athletic Conference women's soccer team.
Kopystynsky, a senior goalkeeper at Pine Manor College in Chestnut Hill, Mass., made 171 saves this fall for the Gators (2-10), the second-best total in the conference. For her career, Kopystynsky made a school-record 615 saves.
• Barry Bottino writes a weekly column and a blog about local college athletes for the Northwest Herald. Write to him at firstname.lastname@example.com, check out his On Campus blog at McHenryCountySports.com and follow him @BarryOnCampus on Twitter.


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We fully support stopping at the gym on the way home from work, but you'd better need to change your clothes!
Our next tip is based off the idea that less is more ...
No. 2: Keep accessories, makeup to a minimum
Unless you're part of Lady Gaga's entourage, your work wardrobe shouldn't contain wacky accessories or costume pieces.
For the office, keep accessories and makeup to a minimum. Some industries, such as fashion or beauty, may allow for more experimentation with trendy looks, but most require a more sophisticated approach.
Avoid jewelry that is overly loud (physically or visually), and (unless you moonlight as a clown) keep your makeup subtle and classy. When it comes to makeup for the workplace, think "old Hollywood glam" at the very most and never ever venture into punk rock for the office.
If you want to look appropriate and trendy, make sure your accessories are not only sophisticated but also in season.
Finally, take some advice from fashion icon Coco Chanel and "before you leave the house, look in the mirror and take one thing off."
Last up, as yourself what would your mother say?
No. 1: Rethink that skimpy outfit
What's the No. 1 rule of thumb for what not to wear to work? If a stripper would wear it to work, you shouldn't (unless of course you're a stripper).
Sure, modern fashion trends have made it acceptable to wear a lacy camisole under your blazer, but anything too revealing should never be worn in the workplace.
Just because Erin Brockovich pulled it off doesn't mean you should give it a try. Keeping your bits covered isn't just about making your office mates more comfortable; it can also potentially ward off unwanted advances. (And who has time for sexual harassment suits these days?)
Most important, by dressing tastefully, you're adopting a more professional image and may be better positioned for a raise or promotion. Of course, this doesn't mean that you have to dress for work from your grandmother's closet; just beware of showing too much skin at the office.
We can't speak for your job performance, but stick to these wardrobe guidelines, and we bet you'll be on the fast track to success. Or at the very least you won't hear yourself asking, "Would you like fries with that?" anytime soon.


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Wednesday, May 22, 2013 - 11:00am – 12:00pm.
North Building - Level 6
Ticketed, members only
Call 720-913-0130, or buy online.
Call 720-913-0130, or buy online.
Before & After: The Conservation Behind Cover Story (May 22)
DAM members can join curatorial and conservation staff for special thematic discussions that offer insider insights on their detailed work with textile art collection objects. See the difference a treatment makes by looking at art works "before and after." Led by Allison McCloskey, Associate Textile Conservator.
The program will be offered three times:
- May 22, 11 am-noon
- June 7, 1-2 pm
- June 19, 10:30-11:30 am
Members only. $5. Space limited.
For details and reservations, call 720-913-0130.


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Two weeks ago I started asking you to give nicknames to five Phillies who really didn't have any real nicknames. Some of the responses were hilarious (Ryan "Can't hit a fucking off-speed pitch" Howard; "The Brown Sombrero"), some were very good, some … ehh … (You could've humored me with more Seanez material!)
But I narrowed the choices down to at least four for each player (I made it five for Werth, since I couldn't leave out "Johnny Wacko," I added some regular stand-bys for Howard, and I took out Happ, who was victim of a send-down during the nicknaming process), so now it's up to you to vote for your favorites.
In the response to this post list your top choice from the finalists of each player. You can copy and paste this to fill in your choices:
Jayson Werth:
Kyle Kendrick:
Ryan Howard:
Rudy Seanez:
And now, the finalists.
Jayson Werth
The Patient
Speed Stick
Jay Bird
Johnny Wacko
Kyle Kendrick
The Kid
Krazy K
The Sink
Ryan Howard
Baby Huey
Giant Power
The Big Man
Rudy Seanez
Black Belt
Cinderblock Head
The Chief
And just to put my two cents in, I'm uncertain with Werth; for Kendrick, The Kid (it seems as if that's his name already); for Howard, I don't know how I feel about giving Howard a nickname solely on his strikeouts when he is an amazing run producer; for Seanez, ColdStone.
0 Comments
werth: johnny wacko
kendrick: krazy k (it's his real life nickname, don't know why we'd need to come up with another one for him)
howard: sky high ry guy
seanez: the pool cleaner
werth: johnny wacko
kendrick: ABSTAIN
howard: the big man
seanez: the chief
Werth: High Net
Kendrick: The Kid
Howard: K-How
Werth: Johnny Wacko
Kendrick: The Kid
Ryan "Can't hit a fucking off-speed pitch†Howard – I stand by it.
Jayson Werth: Jay Bird
Kyle Kendrick: The Kid
Ryan Howard: The Big Man
Rudy Seanez:The Chief
Werth: Johnny Wacko
Kendrick: The Kid
Ryan "Can't hit a fucking off-speed pitch†Howard
Seanez: Cinderblock Head
needing nicknames for your players. another example of how Phillie fans are the gayest
Werth – Johnny Wacko (but he eerily reminds me of the King Elf Elrond from LordoftheRings)
Kyle – The Kid
Ryan – Hmmm..don't know. Blanton may wanna be called "the Big Man"
Rudy – I like ColdStone and Sitting Bull
Jayson Werth: The Patient
Kyle Kendrick: The Kid
Ryan Howard: The Big Man
Rudy Seanez: Black Belt
Howard: k-today
Jayson Werth: J-Whack
Kyle Kendrick: K-Kid
Rudy Seanez: Ruby Rudy or Rude Rudy
I got my "boo, fuck you" tshirt.
Make a boo fuck you mug
Jayson "Another Strikeout" Werth
Kyle "I might really be traded to Japan" Kendrick
Ryan "What's the Glove for?" Howard
Rudy "Who?"Seanez
metsR#1 why do you care, why are you here, do you not have anything better to do? Get a life, seriously.
Werth-johnny wacko. Howard-the big man. Kendrick- #2 starter. Seanez-cinderblock head
I vote for cinderblock head
Jayson Werth
The Patient
Kyle Kendrick
The Sink
Ryan Howard
Giant Power
Rudy Seanez
Black Belt
Jayson Werth – Johnny Wacko
Kyle Kendrick – The Sink
Ryan Howard – K-How
Rudy Seanez – Cinderblock head
When I submitted "Johnny Wacko" for Werth I was just joking but apparently it has a nice little cult following now. My choices are:
Werth: Jay Bird
Kendrick: The Kid
Howard: K-How
Seanez: Chief
Werth– Abstain
Kendrick — The Kid
Howard — The Big Man
Seanez — The Chief
Lets be honest any of the other ones wouldnt stick.
And if K-How wins for Howard, you have the wrong type of fans reading this website.
Jayson Werth: JAY BIRD
Kyle Kendrick: The Kid
Ryan Howard: UPS
Rudy Seanez: Cheif
Jayson Werth
Johnny Wacko
Kyle Kendrick
The Kid
Ryan Howard
The Big Man
Rudy Seanez
love UPS for howard. makes sense on so many levels. first of all, he actually physically resembles a UPS truck. and second, he knows how to deliver.
disappointed we couldn't come up with anything in regards to his obscenely gigantic nose however.
are you phillie fans seriously gay enough to be making up nicknames for your players?wow leave it to the announcers fags
Jayson Werth: Johnny Wacko
Kyle Kendrick: The Kid
Ryan Howard: K-How
Rudy Seanez: The Real Deal
And mets123 is obviously latently homosexual.
Krazy K
The Big Man
The Chief
Jayson Werth: Definitely Johnny Wacko- I witnessed it at a bar in Pittsburgh. He's Creepy
Kyle Kendrick: The Kid
Ryan Howard: The Big Man although my friends and I call him "The Breeze" for when he strikes out
Rudy Seanez: Chief
Werth – captain gay beard
Kendrick – "everybody hits, woohoo"
Howard – I like the one about the offspeed pitch
Seanez – my future landscaper
All I know how to do is make gay jokes! Gay! Gay! Gay!
Who's Jason Werth?
Jayson Werth: johnny wacko
Kyle Kendrick: the kid
Ryan Howard: k-how krush
Rudy Seanez: cinderblock head
ryan howard: rhrh (obviously, ryan homerun howard – cause he's still a champ even with the k's)
lou marson: the arson
you cant call kyle kendrick the kid.ted williams and ken griffey jr are the kids and their we all know kyle kendrick isnt in that league.
jayson stark just picked the phils to win the nl east over on espn. check out the debate, there's some angry mets fans:
Werth: Johnny Wacko (it just fits)
Kendrick: The Kid (regardless of who else has gone by that name in the past, he doesn't strike out enough people to have a nickname featuring the letter "K")
Howard: I still vote for Big Brown, as politically incorrect as it may be
Seanez: The Chief (I have seen him pitch like twice this year if that, I have no idea).
Mets fans: "Uncreative Douches Who Have Nothing Better To Do"
Jayson Werth: johnny wacko (how can this not be his nickname)
Kyle Kendrick: the kid (It just works)
Ryan Howard: Airshow (This works too. He either hits it far or there is a big "air" breeze… it works. We have to give him some props for his HR ability)
Rudy Seanez: The chief (I just like calling him chief)
I don't think Rudy Seanez deserves a nickname.. which is why I submitted "THE WHO?"
Im pretty sure they call Kendrick, The Kid.. so I say we stick with that..
Werth has been clutch a few times with his bat this year.. and that combined with his figure.. I submitted "STICK".. and then rambled off "SPEED STICK" because he can swipe some bags too..
Johnny Wacko just doesn't do anything for me..
Ryan Howard.. K-How is the funniest.. and I think Harry K calls him THE BIG MAN.. so we would have a hard time convincing others to call him anything different
the best nickname for werth is definitely captain gay beard . . . he's like a wild pirate with a truly terrible goatee.
Jayson Werth:Jhonny Wacko
Kyle Kendrick: The Kid
Ryan Howard:The Big Man
Rudy Seanez:The Chief
Jayson werth IS johnny wacko. Although I am partial to "vagina chin". Seanez has to be "cinderblockhead". Anyone who disagrees on the seanez issue has obviously never seen his enormous square head.
Jimmy Rollins- Jroll or wishlist
Jayson Werth- J Dub
Chase Utley- Chase Clutchy
Ryan Howard- Big Brown
Pat Burrell- Pat "Buisness" Burrell or Pat the Bat or Bat
Shane Victorino- The FLyin Hawaiin
Pedro Feliz- pvp
Carlos ruiz- Carlos "chooch" Ruiz


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16 May 2011
The Mummy, with the original idea for a low-budget, atmospheric horror movie eventually giving way to a huge tentpole action-adventure, a knock-off of the Indiana Jones trilogy that used, as flavoring, elements of the stodgy old classic. This film was a huge hit, leading to a sequel, The Mummy Returns, and turning director Stephen Sommers (whose idea it had been to gin up the works with all the best CGI money could buy in those days and amp up the matinee thrills at the expense of scares) into one of the big effects-movie directors of the turn of the decade.
The first thing Sommers did with his newfound clout was to return to the Universal well, this time dusting off the studio's Holy Trinity of monsters: Count Dracula, the Frankenstein monster, and the wolf man. Once again, horror would take a back-seat to action and CGI-driven setpieces the likes of which the workaday craftsmen toiling in Universal's B-movie arm in the '40s could only have seen in their wildest daydreams. The result was Van Helsing.
Put it another way: it's the already-lousy House of Frankenstein as done up by a filmmaker whose idea of style is to make things as loud and busy as possible, whose absolutely best work ever is that same 1999 The Mummy, a movie whose saving grace is that its dumbness is soothing rather than grating, and whose next film after this, by some five years, would be the indescribably horrid G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra. It's only the existence of that later film that keeps Van Helsing from being the absolute nadir of his career, but that's not saying much; it's kind of like how The Village is right in the middle of M. Night Shyamalan's filmography, quality-wise.
The film opens in 1887 with a black-and-white sequence that neatly summarises the entire history of the Universal monster movie from 1931 to 1945. A particularly sallow grave digger (Tom Fisher) leads a huge army of pitchforks n' torches villagers against the cliffside castle of Dr. Victor Frankenstein (Samuel West), just at that very instant bringing to life an especially gruesome version of his monster (Shuler Hensley). That the castle, done in dodgy CGI that is brought to special relief by the artificially hard contrast in the black-and-white, I suppose we are not meant to notice. As it happens, Frankenstein's experiments have been underwritten by a prim, ineffably sleazy nobleman who stands on the edges, watching with intense interest; this is Count Dracula (Richard Roxburgh), whose purpose in funding this mad science will become clear in due course; for this opening sequence, let us instead attend to the film's depiction of the count, which is much more "trashy East European clubber in an opera cape" than "villainous demon" or "elegant, but unmistakably threatening nobleman". And that's before Roxburgh opens his mouth, and lets forth with a remarkably unfortunate accent. It's sort of like the actor was trying to decided between more fey version of the voice he sported in Moulin Rouge! or the corniest "I vant to zuhk your blahd!" cod-Hungarian he could, so he just split the difference. At this point, Van Helsing couldn't be going well enough that I would be able to overlook the crippling campiness of it.
Aye, but it's not going well enough, not by a longshot. Already, in a movie that is not yet 8 minutes old when this sequence ends, we have been introduced to embryonic versions of nearly everything that will make Van Helsing a thoroughgoing piece of horse shit: lots of CGI that almost, but not quite, looks like it exists in the same reality as the actors, whirlwind cutting that refuses to achieve in one shot that which can just as readily be shown across sixteen separate edits, fight choreography that looks uncommonly like a video game, and Alan Silvestri's brutalising score that suggests the composer was rolling the dice and hoping that "Mars, the Bringer of War" from Holst's The Planets was in the public domain and there'd be nobody to sue him for ripping it off.
I'd heard that the opening scene was the best part of the movie, largely on account of its loving tribute to Universal horror of yore. It speaks to the quality of Van Helsing that I am tempted to agree with that assessment; at least it doesn't have any of the eardrum-rending dialogue that's found in nearly every other moment of the film.
So it's a year later, in Paris; a shadowy figure in a bitchin' hat is chasing a burly giant through the streets. The giant is none other than Mr. Hyde (Robbie Coltrane's voice behind a superlatively unconvincing special effect), the hat-wearing hunter is Gabriel Van Helsing (Hugh Jackman), and the idea that Hyde is hiding in Paris is an unimaginative lift from the Alan Moore/Kevin O'Neill comic book The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen*. As for that "Gabriel" Van Helsing business, it's something to do with rights, or because Stephen Sommers thought that "Abraham" was a bad name for a hero (probably because there are no Americans named Abraham other than presidents), or perhaps because the movie rapes the soul of enough classic figures of literature and cinema that they decided to just let us pretend that this Van Helsing was a totally different character.
By "totally different", I of course mean that Gabriel Van Helsing is an amnesiac super-soldier in the employ of the Knights of the Holy Order, a super-secret black ops group deep within the Catholic Church, and in the fashion of movie badasses throughout time, his higher-ups (embodied by Cardinal Prissypants, or some such, played by an unusually bug-eyed Alun Armstrong) are irritated by his efficient but too-violent ways. This gets dropped the second it's raised, for now Van Helsing and his unstoppable monster-killing powers are to be sent to the Carpathian mountains, where the vampire-hunting Valerious family is down to its last legs, and because of a vow that no member of that bloodline will enter heaven until Dracula is destroyed by a Valerious, the church is deeply concerned about the potential for nine generations of brave, faithful warriors stuck forever in Purgatory. Off Van Helsing goes, then, along with Friar Carl (David Wenham), a sort of steampunk Q, who invents any number of awesome bullshit weapons, the most important of which is a gas-powered crossbow that shoots silver rounds. It is at this point we learn two things: that Stephen Sommers believes friars to be something like monks-in-training, the Cub Scouts of the monastic system, and that Carl is going to be our designated Odious Comic Relief for the movie. And it's nice to see that the filmmaker's love of classic Universal horror extends to recreating the exact kind of bumbling, wacky, criminally unfunny moron who so often got in the hero's way.
The pair finally gets to the little Transylvanian village, there is lots of forced exposition (Carl asks Van Helsing about his missing memory as they wander through the town square, to which the vampire hunter curtly replies that it's not the time. No, the time was during the weeks the two of you spent alone traveling through the wilderness, as we just saw in montage), and we meet the last of the Valerious clan, who is for obvious reasons a gorgeous woman in a leather halter top, Anna (Kate Beckinsale). We also meet Dracula's three brides (Elena Anaya, Silvia Colloca, and Josie Maran), who look rather more like harpies than vampires when they get to attacking the town, but no matter. At this point the movie descends into nothing more than a string of setpieces all in a row, with something in the way of a plot connecting them all, though frankly it's not worth my time or yours for me to explain what it is in other than the broadest strokes: Dracula wants to take over the world, he needs the life-force of the Frankenstein monster to do it, Van Helsing is grim and surly and shoots things with his steampunk megacrossbow.
"Descends" into a string of setpieces, did I say? Nay, the film has been a string of setpieces from the second it opens, with only the occasional vomiting forth of crudely functional dialogue interrupting what Sommers apparently believed in good faith was exciting movie action. It is not. There are certain elements of the film that are appealing: the design, of both sets and monsters, is certainly imaginative if at times overworked (the Frankenstein creature is a particularly thoughtful labor of love); and it's nice to see a monster mash-up that assembles the components with a bit more thought for how to incorporate them all into a single narrative than Universal's classic efforts ever managed. Then again, House of Frankenstein, for all its flaws, managed to get in and out in 71 minutes, while Van Helsing takes a wholly unjustified 2 hours and 12 minutes to finish cranking out its ludicrously epic tale.
And what fills that hugely indulgent time? A little bit of asinine or clumsy dialogue here (too many examples to mention, though I will point out that one of the vampire brides at one point taunts Anna with "too bad, so sad"), the giggle-worthy spectacle of Beckinsale's idea of a Transylvanian accent; the jaw-dropping sight of not one, but two horse-drawn carriages exploding like the wood was soaked in napalm; people falling from great heights and shaking it off; and CGI. Lots and lots of weightless, shiny CGI. It's far too easy to joke that the film boils down to Castlevania: The Movie, and the movie does itself no favors by looking so damn much like a video game. By the tenth or fifteenth time we see one character or another swinging down to land in the middle of a setpiece, the movie has completely ceased to resemble anything but a chain of cutscenes - cutscenes from an absolutely kick-ass game, mind you, but we're not playing Van Helsing, we're watching it. And not having remotely as much fun.
It's a screaming, noisy, overedited mess of a movie that has virtually no merits I can think of, and a running time that no movie in this genre could possibly justify; so of course it was a big hit and as of 2011 holds the record for having the largest gross of any vampire movie that's not a Twilight picture. Sometimes, I just don't feel very good about the moviegoing public.
13 comments:
- nathanrm said...
Now I kind of wish I had picked a bad movie for you to review since your critiques of shitty films are always delightful to read. I had totally forgotten about this movie. In fact, I think I forgot about it as soon as I exited the theater.
- The.Watcher said...
Well, it's still better than LXG... I mean, that movie single-handedly killed Connery's career, while Backinsale, Jackman and Sommers all moved on to other things. I am extremely worried for Cap USA, however, as the trailer was pretty good until the "Directed by" credit came on-screen.
- Samuel Wilson said...
Do you suppose it was ironic or merely telling that Shuler Hensley, Sommers's Monster, was subsequently cast for the same role in the Broadway musical production of Young Frankenstein?
- Tim said...
Hensley was probably the single best part of the movie, truth be told, though the monster in this movie was very different from Brooks's - more like Mary Shelley's original moral philosopher isolated from humanity.
In more important matters, the idea of a Van Helsing vs LXG face-off gives me a sick feeling in my gut like none other. I hate them both with all my heart, let's leave it at that.
- Zev Valancy said...
I think it speaks to the reasons for the film's success that, despite knowing that the movie is wretched, the phrase "steampunk megacrossbow" made me smile, and want to see the movie.
Incidentally, Hensley won a Tony just before this film for playing Jud Fry in a revival of "Oklahoma!", which was based on a revival in London a few years before. In that production, Hensley also played Jud, opposite the Curley of...Hugh Jackman.
- The.Watcher said...
Whoops, made a mistake: it turns out that Marvel had the good sense to boot Sommers off of Cap USA, Martin Campbell is the one that took the reigns. Be thankful for small miracles.
- Tim said...
Double-check that again: Campbell is on Green Lantern. I think you'll find Cap is in the hands of Joe "Wolfman" Johnston. Or Joe "Honey I Shrunk the Kids" Johnston, if you're feeling generous. And like Honey, I Shrunk the Kids.
Zev: I wash my hands of whatever horrible decision you're about to make.
- Zev Valancy said...
Oh, don't worry, the impulse passed quickly. I'll probably make a far less damaging choice, involving hookers, cocaine, or mozzarella sticks.
- Densua said...
"and as of 2011 holds the record for having the largest gross of any vampire movie that's not a Twilight picture."
I want you to tell me that is a lie and that you made it up as a belated April Fools joke. Make it untrue, Tim.
That film was atrocious! I remember coming out of it actually HATING the actors (screw you, Beckinsale, and your pointless pointlessness in this movie and your stupid voice and your crappy outfit, and you Jackman, how could you DO this to me, man, after all the love we had with X-Men??). I remember one bit made me laugh: the werewolves. Awful CGI. That was one of the first times I realised I hated CGI too. CGI is only ever good when you don't notice it exists.
- oddsock said...
Thanks, I enjoyed that. I do like to read a merciless, withering commentary on what anyone with a quarter of a brain can see is a worthless imitation of the cinematic art that should be an embarrassment to everyone involved in producing it. It restores my faith in humanity.
- Quadzilla99 said...
"Put it another way: it's the already-lousy House of Frankenstein as done up by a filmmaker whose idea of style is to make things as loud and busy as possible, whose absolutely best work ever is that same 1999 The Mummy"
Sommers best movie is his version of the Jungle Book and don't just take my word for it; the flick which has 19 positive reviews to one negative at rotten tomatoes.
- Tim said...
You have to wonder what he was doing in the 4-year gap between that and Deep Rising that made him change from family-friendly literary adaptations to stupid action pictures. I will confess to never having seen Jungle Book, nor his Huckleberry Finn.
- Guy Callaway said...
God, this movie...
Though it was released in 2004, it STILL depresses me.
Not because the way it dropped a steaming load on the Uni monsters, but just that it's so...wrong, on SO many levels.
You covered it's problems well, so I won't say much more, but I can't really think of a single, recent film that shows the absolute worst of Hollywood group-think than this.


text:
Blount, Gilbert win in Laguna Hills
LAGUNA HILLS – When Andrew Blount answered his phone early Wednesday morning, he had just learned he unofficially won the race for one of two open seats on the Laguna Hills City Council.
Blount received 4,766 votes, or 27.5 percent of the vote, according to preliminary figures from the Orange County Registrar of Voters. Blount was follwed by Dore Gilbert who garnered 4,141 votes, or 23.9 percent of the vote.
Gilbert had driven to Blount's house to congratulate him and subsequently found out that he, too, had won.
"I'm very excited," Gilbert said. "We will work hard for the city of Laguna Hills. The City Council will come together in a cohesive way to lead the city forward in a fiscally responsible way in order to serve the needs of our citizens."
Blount said he's looking forward to serving Laguna Hills' residents and making the city an even better place to live and run businesses.
"We're going to be able to do ever greater things in the city that I love," he said.
Earlier in the night at the Hills Hotel, Blount and candidate Raghu Mathur held an election results watch party. The two candidates are aligned with Councilwoman Barbara Kogerman, who was optimistic they would be the highest vote getters.
Kogerman said Blount and Mathur winning would allow her to achieve the reformist agenda she ran on in 2010, when she was elected to the council, including compensation reform for management employees.
Blount said his election would mean a sharper focus on recruiting businesses to the city, reforming city management compensation and employee pensions, and enhancing public safety.
Gilbert has said his focus is a balanced budget with a surplus, realistic compensation for employees, public safety and well-maintained parks.
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Summer Academic Programs Calendar
Summer Quantitative Reasoning Institute
At SQRI, rising high school juniors and seniors use quantitative reasoning and data analysis skills to analyze issues in the social sciences
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25 U.S. Code § 471 - Vocational and trade schools; appropriation for tuition
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#114153 - 10/31/03 05:38 PM Re: Is down an ejaculation?
Carpal Tunnel
Registered: 09/30/01
Posts: 6296
Loc: Piedmont Region of Virginia, U...
Well, at least consider the comment of a student I was working with after school today. He's never really concentrated on parts of speech before in his life, and he has been quite confused so far this year.
However, a few light bulbs have gone off--and he even made the connection between "object of the preposition" and the "objective case pronouns" today. He also laughed when I told him that on the test I would try to trap kids by calling proper nouns a part of speech in a multiple choice listing of various incorrect and one correct listing. He's coming along so well that I got tears in my eyes right after he left me today. There is no high higher in my life than seeing a student begin to understand. It is the best thing I know.
I asked him to name the parts of speech (one of many practices) and he said,
"Noun...pronoun...verb....adjective....adverb....suburb....conjunction....and ejaculation."
And I promise you I am telling God's truth. I can hold my laughter almost always, but when he said that final part of speech I burst out laughing and laughed and laughed and laughed. I laughed so hard that he began laughing with me, all the while asking, "What's so funny, Ms. E? What's so funny?"
#114154 - 10/31/03 08:07 PM Re: Is down an ejaculation?
Carpal Tunnel
Registered: 04/09/00
Posts: 3065
Loc: Jakarta
Indeed, Mrs. E., what is so funny? The boy is simply a mite old-fashioned. I quote from Webster's dictionary (http://machaut.uchicago.edu/cgi-bin/WEBSTER.sh?WORD=ejaculation):
2. The uttering of a short, sudden exclamation or prayer, or the exclamation or prayer uttered.
He is merely unaware that our sex-obsessed society has focused on the biological aspects of the third definition. Such innocence should surely be enouraged as eminently praiseworthy rather than provoke unbridled laughter.
#114155 - 10/31/03 08:19 PM Re: Is down an ejaculation?
Carpal Tunnel
Registered: 06/24/02
Posts: 7210
Loc: Vermont
"one doesn't often hear 'down!' while ejaculating", he interjected..._________________________
formerly known as etaoin...
#114156 - 10/31/03 08:30 PM Re: Is down an ejaculation?
Carpal Tunnel
Registered: 07/20/03
Posts: 3230
Loc: Te Ika a Maui
I'm glad I'm not the only one, Bingley. I had actually had to look twice before I got the joke._________________________
noho ora mai
Carpal Tunnel
Registered: 03/15/00
Posts: 6511
Loc: lower upstate New York
Name calling, aka the ad hominem approach, is so needless and unfriendly. I wish you and the tiny minority of others who resort to this m.o. would refrain and, instead, participate in the spirit of this board.
As for interjections, I disagree, and I am also a "girl." It's a matter of begging the question here, I think. The word in this context is an adverb no matter what the dog does.
#114158 - 11/01/03 09:41 AM Re: MELT
Carpal Tunnel
Registered: 09/30/01
Posts: 6296
Loc: Piedmont Region of Virginia, U...
I certainly realize that ejaculations can be verbal! Lord, what do you take me for?
However, after moving from suburbs to ejaculations, I just was so amused that I couldn't hold my laughter. And, you know? We were working after school, Friday afternoon, and were happy to be working--both of us. We pulled down maps, books, wrote, tried all kinds of combinations--and we worked a long, productive period of time. Things were coming together in this our second Friday afternoon of after-school sessions. Forgive me for being human, but I just couldn't help it. And he was as amused at me for being spontaneous rather than the usually under-control being my more pedigogical persona is.
Let me immediately put on my pince-nez and purse my lips and return to suburbs and ejaculations and adverbs and interjections with complete fastidiousness and congratulate him on his synonym for interjection. Lord, this suit of steel wool feels good.
#114159 - 11/01/03 10:10 AM Re: MELT
Registered: 01/05/01
Posts: 1814
Loc: Spam Factory
Suburbs? Is that a joke? /needs more coffee
#114160 - 11/01/03 10:38 AM Re: suburbs as parts of speech
Carpal Tunnel
Registered: 09/30/01
Posts: 6296
Loc: Piedmont Region of Virginia, U...
You all must not work with kids very often, is all I can say--or at least with kids who have gotten basic information mixed up over the years. Or with kids who at times have trouble with auditory processing.
For the record, the fact that this work is wonderfully rewarding--that a teenaged student who had detested English in previous years was willing to stay after school on a Friday afternoon--remember your own Friday afternoons in high school?--was terrific. And that he'd remembered to come by my classroom for two Fridays in a row! Wow!
So, we looked at maps and books together--and wrote a lot--and talked a lot about words in the language...differences between prepositions and their objects, for instance. This was a step-by-step procedure with several steps backwards. For instance, we worked the classic exercise where you draw a cloud and then think of words that would fit this construction:
The bird flew ____________ + the cloud.
The bird flew ____________ + the clouds.
It doesn't work for every preposition, such 'according to' and 'aside from', but it works for most of the hundred I use on our working list. Every now and then my student would say something like, "The clouds went over the sky." And I knew he'd lost focus on putting clouds as the object of the preposition. But, by and large, most of his reponses filled in the formula well--and he went on to replace either 'the cloud' or 'the clouds' with either 'it' or 'them'. You might think that this sounds terribly dry, but it wasn't because I was witnessing the joy on his face as he realized really important things, such as when we plugged in objective case pronouns as objects of prepositions, he said, "It sounds wrong to say 'about I'"--and I thought, 'Hallelujah!'
Anyway, at the end of a very long session when I had him list those eight parts of speech and, although he nailed most of them, he said 'suburb' and 'ejaculation', it just cracked me up. And I cracked him up when I cracked up. We're on the right path here, and, no, I wouldn't have gone into various definitions of ejaculation with a student. Quite improper.
#114161 - 11/01/03 11:05 AM Re: character
Carpal Tunnel
Registered: 03/15/00
Posts: 11613
Loc: Louisville, Kentucky
Speaking of speaking volumes: We were working after school, Friday afternoon...and we worked a long, productive period of time...our second Friday afternoon of after-school sessions. My Dear--it is a rare gem of a teacher who is willing to stay after on a Friday. They will remember you for the rest of their lives, I think. Because so few teachers make it so clear that they care.
MELT--I bid you welcome aBoard, but feel obliged to add this: by and large, we love each other, here; many of us have become friends, both virtually and in real life. We do try to welcome newcomers; but frankly, we don't like ugliness of any kind. (Um--I don't mean to imply that we're perfectly free of it all the time; we're not.) I do realize that sometimes there is teasing here that may appear ugly, but it is done between friends who know that the recipient will take it in the right spirit; and that a newcomer would have no way of knowing the background. And I guess if that upsets a newcomer, we'll just have to keep explaining; I don't think it's realistic to expect a group to constantly be on their guard in case new people might be around; and also, I for one would miss the fun. Quite recently I jumped on a newcomer quite hard, for me, but she had directly insulted someone whom I hold very dear (yours wasn't quite so direct). I tried to get it across that I would welcome sincere interest in information- and fun-exchange, but as far as I know she hasn't posted again, and I do feel bad about that. But I will not sit idly by when my friends are under the gun, and I make no apology for that.
I say all this to you, MELT, not as chastisement--it would also be unrealistic to expect a newcomer to understand all the nuances/ins and outs--but by way of giving information, with a tad of warning in it. We do welcome differences of opinions, truly; but if someone has something ugly to say, then I would ask that it be done by Private Message, not in public, please.
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Ericsson and TeliaSonera today announced the signing of a commercial LTE (long term evolution) network. The roll-out of the 4G mobile broadband network will offer the highest data rates ever realized, with the best interactivity and quality. This network will cover Sweden's capital Stockholm and the contract is Ericsson's first for commercial deployment of LTE.
Ericsson and TeliaSonera have started the roll-out in Stockholm, Sweden for commercial launch 2010. Ericsson will perform network implementation services and will manage the network during the initial operation period. The agreement also includes a long-standing partnership where both parties will jointly evolve the way consumers use mobile broadband with LTE.
Ericsson provides TeliaSonera with an LTE system (4G), including LTE Radio Base stations, which are part of the new RBS6000 series, an Evolved Packet Core network and mobile backhaul solution including Redback's SmartEdge 1200 routers and the latest EDA multi-access aggregation switch. The LTE system is based on 3GPP standards for Long Term Evolution (LTE) radio technology and System Architecture Evolution (SAE) core technology.
LTE is a continued evolution of GSM/CDMA/WCDMA/TD-SCDMA (i.e. 2G and 3G) mobile networks and is an integrated part of Ericsson's Full Service Broadband offering. Ericsson offers high capacity radio access (LTE), high capacity EDA multi-access edge routers, evolved packet core networks (SAE), multimedia communication with IMS and high-capacity, low-cost carrier Ethernet transport. Through its work in standardization bodies and its own development, Ericsson is also a strong player in the large ecosystem of mobile broadband enabled devices.
"Our customers are among the world's most advanced users of telecommunications services. With 4G, we will provide them with the best mobile broadband capabilities they can get. We have chosen Ericsson as our partner because of its impressive track record in mobile technology, strong focus on LTE development and early deployment capabilities," said Erik Hallberg, senior vice president and head of mobility services Sweden at TeliaSonera.
Tags: Ericsson, TeliaSonera, 4G, LTE


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I am sure you have noticed the countdown features on e.g. sport sites showing countdown until a big event. You have probably also seen sites that are not online yet or down for maintenance using a jQuery countdown timer to tell visitors when to come back. This is called a under construction timer or landing page. They can also be used to countdown to a release date of a game, a movie or to a party. Countdown or jQuery timer scripts simply have many useful use cases and the good news is that there are some really good scripts you can use on your site.
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In this article, you will find most of the useful jQuery countdown scripts available right now. jQuery is also useful in many other areas and in particular jQuery Slider, jQuery carousel and plugins can give a website a face-lift. If I missed some scripts, you like then please leave a comment. I am doing ongoing updates to the article where I add new jQuery countdown timers and check the links and current ratings of the elements I have included.
Disclosure: Please note that some of the links below are affiliate links and I will earn a commission if you purchase through those links (at no extra cost to you). I recommend that you do your own independent research before purchasing any product or service. This article is not a guideline, a recommendation or endorsement of specific products.
Article Index
Premium jQuery Countdown Scripts
jCountdown Mega Package – MORE INFO / DEMO
This is a quite new but promising jQuery countdown script. jCountdown is a customizable jQuery countdown plugin, you can use on your site to show a cool and easy to customize countdown timer.You should check the demo page as it is very well set up and allows you to play with all the settings through a easy to use interface.
JBMarket Circular Countdown – MORE INFO / DEMO
This is one of my favorites as it stands out visually from the rest and most countdown timer we see used at the moment. JBMarket circular countdown is a jQuery countdown timer with cool looking circular design. It is a great way for counting the time left to an event. Comes with 5 ready to use pages and psd file.
Circular Countdown jQuery Plugin – MORE INFO / DEMO
With this jQuery countdown plugin, you'll be able to create simple, clean and original countdowns. This plugin mixes a jQuery countdown combined with canvas shapes easy to configure via a set of options.
Coconut – Jquery Countdown Plugin – MORE INFO / DEMO
This is another must see jQuery countdown script with a circular design. You get a set of backgrounds for the under construction page and a countdown script where you can adjust the colors and sizes of the circular elements. There is also a % status bar feature included.
Dynamic Countdown with Counter – MORE INFO / DEMO
Customisable Countdown Counter You can generate a few different colours, fonts an font weight with out handy generator.
Countdown / construction page – MORE INFO / DEMO
Easy adaptable countdown, under construction – page. Including manual for easy set-up.
Coming soon landing page – MORE INFO / DEMO
Javascript Under Construction Website Counter!
Fresh Parallax Under Construction Countdown – MORE INFO / DEMO
Fresh Parallax Under Construction upgrades your "Coming Soon" page with a dynamic 3D cloudy sky with your logo or item of choice in focus.
LuxCountdown – MORE INFO / DEMO
Custom countdown timers style (with css), javascript framework indipendent, no coding knowledge need for basic usage, simple themes for countdown timers already included.
Live Brodcast Countdown Module – MORE INFO / DEMO
Nice jQuery based countdown timer. Header text depending on countdown stateus (counting down or finished). A lot of options available. Upon time expiration the module will display the expiration message for the amount of time set in back-end. When this time reaches its limit the module will restart the countdown until next event.
Easy Countdown – MORE INFO / DEMO
jsCountdown – MORE INFO / DEMO
Included are 14 different skins to choose from and a template file (png format) to make your own.
Broadcast Countdown Widget – MORE INFO / DEMO
Nice widget for WordPress making it easy to add professional´ly looking countdown timer to a WordPress based site.
JavaScript Animated Counter – MORE INFO / DEMO
Simple, animated JavaScript counter, which will allow You to present rapidly increased or decreased values, such as number of registered users, total income etc. But that's not all… this counter can be also used as a text or date & time displayer or as a clock. It can be also used as a countdown, to show time left for the beginning of a product release campaign or a sale start.
Fancy Countdown – jQuery plugin – MORE INFO / DEMO
Fancy Countdown is a highly customizable jQuery plugin that lets you create an outstanding countdown. It´s very easy to use. You can set an own target date with a timezone. The plugin comes with an extensive API.
FlipTimer – MORE INFO / DEMO
FlipTimer 1.2 with 8 color themes ready made and a beautiful template with working contact form included
Free jQuery Countdown Scripts
jQuery Countdown – MORE INFO
This is a jQuery plugin that sets a div or span to show a countdown to a given time. There are tons of options available and everything is supported by good examples and code snippets.
Countdown – MORE INFO
Countdown is a highly flexible javascript flip clock.
jQuery Plugin – KK Countdown – MORE INFO / DEMO
KK countdown is a jQuery countdown plugin that counts down to specific dates in the future.
littlewebthings CountDown – MORE INFO / DEMO
This is an Easy to use animated countdown JavaScript. It is jQuery compatible and easily skinable
jQuery Countdown plugin that doesn't sucks! – MORE INFO
Countdown timer jQuery Plugin – MORE INFO
A simple jQuery Plugin that countdowns how long it is from a date. Very easy to use and a good download package with everything needed to get started.
jQuery CountDown Plugin – MORE INFO
This script allows you to create a rapidshare.com like countdown and to animate the CSS font-size of each second and present a reward at the end.
How can I make a jQuery countdown – MORE INFO
This is a really simple script, but it is a countdown script…
The Countdown jQuery plugin (translated)
Easy to use countdown script. Unfortunately no demo or example.