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We are Korean Moms in training dedicated to psycho-analyzing our moms, reliving horrible memories of embarrassment and dread for the benefit of the public...all the while laughing like a wheezy grandpa. Someone needs to pay for our therapy...
Monday, March 17, 2008
#15 Mother in law/Daughter in law adversity
53 comments:
i'm going through this right now. it doesnt make ANY sense and its unfair.
- July 8, 2008 at 2:36 PM
LOL yes true
my brother has not been married yet but my mom hates all the GF he had. and she tried to break them up all the time. she says all the girls my brother dates are evil, slutty or stupid and ugly LOL!!
- July 21, 2008 at 10:13 PM
I do believe you've been peeking through my mother-in-law's window and seeing our interactions!! lol
- July 29, 2008 at 1:32 AM
I don't understand this one either. Why are kmil's so notoriously nasty to their dils??? My kmil made it so obvious that she was jealous of me and my DH's relationship. She acts like a 13 yr old brat!
- August 5, 2008 at 11:52 PM
Sadly, in Korean culture the daughter-in-law is basically "adopted" into the husband's family. Her family no longer exists. The mother-in-law is master and the daughter-in-law is slave. Maybe just like abused children often grow up to become abusive, those who had the toughest mother-in-laws become those bitter, hateful mother-in-laws, of course that's no excuse. In Korea the divorce rate is nearly 50%, only second to the states, mostly because of the difficult mother-in-law, daughter-in-law relationships. But, I do know some very kind Korean mother-in-laws, interestingly they had no mother-in-laws of their own or they also had very kind mother-in-laws. Maybe that's what to look for, ask your boyfriend's mom what HER mother-in-law was like before saying yes. :)
- August 6, 2008 at 1:59 AM
50% divorce rate?! What a load of bullshit. Not even the US has such high divorce rates and they have the most relaxed divorce laws.
I hate it when people spout statistics without backup. Huh, as if adding a % sign to their opinions would make it any more valid.
- August 7, 2008 at 5:08 PM
Anony@07-Aug-08/5:08pm: Accuracy aside, find it odd that you offer up stats to put down use of stats, especially when sources cited don't necessarily have most current figures. Regardless of actual percentage, significant that globally, divorce rate of Korea is 3rd behind US and UK.
- August 9, 2008 at 2:35 PM
I had a lot of Korean friends in college, and heard about stressful family dynamics -- mainly interfering moms and intolerant dads -- from them. I made a mental note to not marry a Korean. But now, 15 years later, I've realized that my mother is the biggest brat on earth, and my MIL comes from a lousy, blame-filled family too. Her two oldest sons don't even talk to her. No, she's not Korean. The joke is on me. This is universal.
- August 10, 2008 at 8:19 PM
I am so glad to know I'm not the only one going through this! Korean MIL is nice to my face but when my back is turned, she lays into her son and yells at him about things she thinks I do wrong. Most of which is greatly embellished, haha. We recently butted heads because I need to get ready for work at the same time she needs to get ready for church. There is only one bathroom. I think you see where this is going...
- August 25, 2008 at 4:38 PM
This is not relevant to Korean moms. This applies to ALL moms. All moms do not approve their daughters in law.
- August 29, 2008 at 12:37 PM
- Heather *IsaBella and Harrison's Mommy* said...
First of all, as EMBARRASSING as it may be, it's true that Korea is/was #1 or #2 in highest divorce rates... Sad, but true... (And of course, US was #1 or #1) Anyhoos, I've known kmil's to be the worst MIL's on earth, but I have an angel for a MIL and she treats me like her own daughter (maybe even better?) and I just have a great love, admiration and respect for her. She is the woman who birthed my wonderful husband and brought him up to be the AWESOME dad and hubby that he is. She is patient when I'm retarded, always teaches me new things (especially in the kitchen/cooking department), and loves my children like there's no tomorrow. I love her very much and am so glad that she is not the typical KMIL!
Love always,
P.S. My mom is so jealous that I have a good relationship with my MIL because her MIL was a witch and yup, she's looking up at us from Hell!
- October 10, 2008 at 2:16 AM
I wish you wouldn't even think might not be quick or smart (retar etc.) for a second because some MIL's like you if somehow you feel "less" than they (not respect, but demeaned somehow).
Anyway, you ARE lucky- I've been wanting to marry my boyfriend for six years but she and a manipulative family comes with it. Its very depressing. Maybe someday we will move far away from them.
- October 20, 2008 at 4:23 AM
My wife is Korean, I love her Mum, she is kind and loving, she cooks well and feeds me. When I was going out with a western girl her parents were worse. Much worse!
- December 17, 2008 at 1:21 AM
joe--the problem is usually with mothers-in-law and daughters-in-law. the parents of a korean women don't usually give shit to their daughter's husband. my mom loves my husband, but give lots of shit to my brother's wife. there's definitely something here about how much license you think you have as a mother-in-law to torture your daughter-in-law.
- February 24, 2009 at 2:53 PM
I have heard that Korean parents usually prefer their korean daughters to marry outside of the culture and their sons to marry within the culture. Reasoning for this was reported to be due to the traditions/cultures expectations of korean women to be obedient and subservient to the korean husband. So when their daughters get married korean parents are approving and accepting of caucasian husbands, because they feel their daughters will be free to be who they are and taken care of. But yet, they still expect their korean sons to marry korean women.
- May 28, 2009 at 7:14 PM
I hate to say this, but I think it's an Asian thing in general. I married a Chinese man and am contemplating divorce due to this. If you didn't specify Korean I would have sworn you were talking about his family.
- July 4, 2009 at 3:08 AM
- Okibum said...
Try being a fat waeguk :-)
- August 9, 2009 at 9:39 AM
In fairness to Korean moms, nobody loves you like your mother, and the woman you are marrying probably is a whore.
- November 2, 2009 at 8:49 PM
My half Korean husband just sent me a link to this blog and it does make me feel little better knowing there are other people going through this. My KMIL is ruthless and really I am having trouble figuring out what to do about it. I don't want to get a divorce, but this woman has me in tears almost daily with her berating in front of my children. My husband does his best to defend me, but obviously her opinion of him is not much higher than it is of mine.
My parents never treated me this way and I had no idea this would be an issue until we were married.
Anyway thanks ladies. I wish there was a forum I could vent my daily troubles to.
Today she told my husband in front of me that he would have been better off marrying a garbage lady instead of a blind lady ( I wear glasses)....she said that is what he gets from marrying someone he met on the computer. (We met through a friend on line)
So there's that!
- December 21, 2009 at 6:32 PM
Many of your observations are broader than the Korean context. I don't know if they are universal, but are definitely within the Sinitic world view. Thus, Chinese, Korean, and Vietnamese behaviours and attitudes are quite similar.
- January 18, 2010 at 5:51 PM
Well,I am Russian(but grew in America) and my long-term boyfriend is Korean.Before i went KOrea and met with my MIL everything was great,we had many future plans.We decided every date about marriage,engaging etc.Well,after i met with her in 2nd day,she fought with me.I cant say,we fought because i couldn't say anyworld way she was humiliating me with half korean half english.She doesnt know me at all but she told me,You can not cook,here is Korea not America,she tried to control me actually.Now,she doesnt like me at all.She calls me "devil".and my bf changed the all plans about us.I am so f... up with KOREAN Mother-In-Law
- March 3, 2010 at 11:39 PM
I am so glad I found this blog, you cannot imagine. I have been living with my Half Korean bf for almost 2 years already. We are still very much deeply in love and planning on getting married. I had never met his Korean mom who does not live in the same country as we do. Well, 3 wks ago she came to stay with us. It has been 3 long weeks of hell for me. I welcomed her with open arms. From the 1 st day we went to a buffet dinner with my own family as well - and that night she already told my bf that I'm selfish because I served myself first! At first I was a bit shocked and upset as I was trying my best to make the best impression... things started getting worse by the day. Not only did she start changing everything around in our apartment (including packing all my cosmetics away in my bag as if I were moving...) fair enough; maybe she was being "nice" but the events that were to follow; over the course of the last weeks, I have been called every possible offensive name in the book. She treats me like a slave, she says mean things about me to her son and makes me feel like I'm useless and she keeps telling him that I disrepect her!!(?). I cry every day and she just doesn't stop torturing me mentally. I am a good and kind person, as well as very respectful to EVERYONE I meet, and have dealt with many different people in my life, I am open and informed on different cultures, am Greek myself. However this woman will not stop. She lies to her son about me every day, blows things out of proportion completely. Eg even after she made me cry about something nasty she said to him about me, I offered to drive her around the shops the next day with me (coz if I leave the house alone without her I'm a slut) so as I called the elevator for us, I accidently went in first... and that was it. This event started another huge row, by the time we got to the car, I had to wait for her to even open her damn door. Girls, I'm sorry, this is NOT normal. This is going against our human rights and no-one should EVER be treated like they're 2nd class rubbish. I feel like my rights as a woman - as a human have been denied me, that I have no freedom to think or act the way I choose, I already cook and clean (I always have) but I seriously don't even enjoy doing that anymore even for my bf. I do not want this woman anywhere even near my baby, if I decide to get married to her son and actually have a family of our own.
- April 20, 2010 at 11:18 AM
well, it's all girls here by looks of it... i'm a caucasian male married to a korean woman, and my kmil is as hell as anything above.
demanding to be the centre of our universe, no matter how rude and disrespectful she is to me, the kids or my wife (her daughter!). leaving korea soon because of this woman
- April 29, 2010 at 3:30 AM
To all the people having trouble with their mother-in-laws. You need to get your spouse to stand up to them. The consequence for being disrespectful to you is that they can't be a part of your lives. It's a simple as that. Be kind or leave. Sadly, some of them will choose to leave.
Btw, it goes both ways. You have to treat your mil with respect and kindness too. No talking badly about her to your children and such.
- June 9, 2010 at 9:39 AM
To the guy who replied right after my post here, if my bf could express himself - he would write something here too!
The thing is, in reply to the last post, my bf has tried standing up for me several times, in fact, he even struggles to stand up for himself, against her! But this woman is so mean that once she's crossed and she feels outnumbered - there is really no telling what she's capable of. Eg we prepared a fish bbq especially for her. I even put all our differences aside and went and bought fresh salmon, cod, prawns - all the fish I know she likes. My bf finished work and came home merrily to start the barbie with me, we finished, got everything ready, set the table really lovingly and called her (all this time she was closed up in her room for some reason again...) she mumbled something, and finally came out dressed up, got the keys and left! No explanation, no phone call, nothing. We waited for her until the food got cold, I could see my bf was really embarrassed, we ended up ordering pizza and putting all the fish in the fridge for her. We went to bed (keep in mind that she was on holiday in a new place - where could she have gone? - to this day I still have no clue - probably hiding her face in the parking downstairs for 5 hours) anyway, the following day I woke up and found all the bbqd fish thrown out! I was livid but bit my tongue. She made a little salad for herself and didn't speak to us all day, the following day she was hugging and kissing my bf for some unknown reason! Imagine??!! pride? guilt? - is that why she couldn't eat a meal with us after all the s@#$ she put me through? what is this kind of behaviour? I'm a psychologist and have never seen anything like it. At first, I thought it rude. But as time goes by, and concluding with various diagnoses ranging from borderline, to even pure mania, I realize now that it must be "a Korean thing". Believe me, not all MIL's are like this, actually, I haven't met any other MILS like this. She finally went back to her country, and needless to say, she still hates me, never sends me regards, the secret is here - never make your partner feel bad about it. As long as you know and understand and trust eachother - try to avoid conflict with the KMIL and never ever let her come between you. You both have to realize this to be able to stand up to her when the time comes. Be honest, and always confront her. (Like as if you can! (that's why I'm venting on this wonderful blog...)and that's why I know for sure they're not like other MILs - coz you can't even confront them)... she bullied me for a whole month) but now that I know I will never ever gain her respect, no matter how kind I am, I will try and be myself and will not make the same mistakes again.
- July 10, 2010 at 9:48 AM
- BomberGal said...
My MIL is Korean, I am not.
But she is great. She was disapproving of me at first. As was to be expected, I'm not the most ideal DIL (tattoos, piercings, ect) and I was dating her first born child and only son. But she was never cruel or rude to me.
And once we were married, her only concern was: Don't get divorced. lol
She is very sweet and considerate. And treats me very well. She always sends Hubby and I "couples" matching mugs and other items and she sends me cute socks. And sent us some Korean children's hangul practice books for me to study with.
And her cooking is AMAZING!
I think bad MILs is something people can relate to in all cultures. But not all MILs and In-laws are bad or cruel. Some are great.
I was blessed with great in-laws. My FIL, MIL and SIL are all fantastic. I couldn't ask for better.
- August 8, 2010 at 3:40 PM
That's what caused my divorce from Korean ex-husband. His mom made him choose between me or her...and because of the Korean brain-washing...he couldn't make up his mind. After his mom told me "you have a new family now, we are more important than your old family" I told her to f-off and filed for divorce. I had to take her crap for a year and a half. Ugh! Good riddance!
- November 3, 2010 at 10:03 PM
I don't think all Mother-in-laws are that way but they may be in the beginning and keep it to themselves. My Mother-in-law believes that my husband and I were destined to be together so I think that helps and she said that in the Korean tradition the two that get married if they look alike in some characteristics that its good luck. I know in the beginning it was hard to get to know her and I always did the correct and traditional way to act towards her and now after years of being married to her son and having a miracle baby and because we have decided to raise her by Korean traditions she is like a best friend. When we go to visit and spend the night and her and I stay up late talking and laughing like her and her sister do. So, it makes me feel very special to be accepted in that way and she tells me that I am more Korean than some full Koreans. Which makes me laugh.
- November 19, 2010 at 11:36 AM
I don't know about all KMIL'S but, mine is 2 faced and competetive. I really do not understand her behavior. I am hispanic and have watched my mother treat my sisters in law with respect. I guess that is what I was expecting to receive. She disapproved of our marriage from the get go. She was living in Korea when she found out about the wedding and did all that she could to stop it from the telephone. She came to the states when I was pregnant and was very mean to me. She didnt even want to look me in the eye and gave me the cold shoulder. My FIL has always been great to me.
So, I finally gave birth to my 1st son and her attitude slightly changed until she started chiming in about how I bath my son wrong and how he must be cold all the time. She exaggerates everything!!!!! There couldn't be a bigger drama queen/victim.
Here I am 3 kids later and she is still causing trouble. I don't know who told me this saying but, it seems true to me, "fish smells after 7 days" She has been at my house for 11 days. Did I mention she likes to stay with me for 30-60 days at a time. I don't think she cares abot how imposing that is. My mother would never do such a thing. I needed some time off and left the house without her today, keep in mind my kids were with me. So, she calls a cab to take her to church 50 miles away. Did I mention there are Korean churches a few miles away? I see through her behavior and it drives me nuts. She is totally passive aggressive.
This morning I was washing dishes and she grabs my wrist hard to stop me from washing. This was not the first time she did this but, certainly the last. I finally yelled at her PLEASE STOP. I guess she was surprised and backed off. I am tired of her talking trash behind my back and reading her bible everyday, as if it balances off her terrible behavior. So, basically, everytime she visits there is a huge unnecessary fight/argument. Everytime she visits I seriously contemplate divorce. I am training my girl to keep away from Korean guys!!!!
- November 28, 2010 at 10:22 PM
I am the American mother of a second son. My Korean daughter-in-law told me that my oldest son will "take care of" me and that my younger son will take care of her parents.
I am very hurt because she treats me with no respect at all and rarely says "thank you." Is this because my son is the second son?
- December 21, 2010 at 4:57 PM
Korean husbands and BFs who can't stand up to their own mothers to protect and defend their wives and GFs do not deserve anybody's love. I'm a Korean man raised in America, and you should see some of the atrocious things KMIL (my grandmother) does toward her DIL (my mother). Her behavior is simply insane, unpredictable, childish, psychotic, and deeply disturbing. All KMIL's should study up on UN human rights charter now that Ban Ki Moon is the UN secretary general. And guess what? Most old fashioned Korean MIL's have the gall to constantly spout the "Korea is best!" garbage. Their ignorance in staggering only magnified to the extent they blindly worship expensive brands. Ah that felt good---
- February 3, 2011 at 7:15 AM
I honestly fucking wish that there was a way for all of this stuff to be translated into korean, and i mean GOOD korean none of the half-assed translations that don't match up bu t a good translation that actual KMIL'S and other korean people in general to read.
There are so many things that can be good about korean culture but unfortunately when it comes to marriage, dating and things like this, they hit rock bottom. They seem to not be able to treat someone with respect just because they are younger and that is just WRONG.
Either way, its good that ppl who have a hard time with KMIL's can relate but none of this can remotely be solved UNTIL SOMEONE translates this and gets koreans that don't speak english to actually read it.
It's very aggravating.
- February 10, 2011 at 10:19 PM
- Sandra de Fontenay said...
Asians in general do have this strange MIL DIL relationship. I think it is up to the husband and his whole family to say enough is enough. The whole family should rally against the MIL(mom) who was being unreasonable. How long can she continue to act out? I don't understand why her behavior is tolerated. I mean you can only guilt people who are guilty, this is just feeding to her mania.
- April 21, 2011 at 5:30 AM
- Kate said...
I am a white American woman who married a 1/2 Korean man. His white American father met his Korean mother in Korea and she moved with him back to the U.S. Our situation isn't as extreme as many of these, but it was comforting to read that others are going through similar struggles.
At first, I tried to please my Korean MIL, but now I have retreated, and just try to minimize our interactions and keep a simple but cordial relationship. It's tragic, because I went into this marriage happy to have a new family, and this woman (the typical controlling Korean matriarch) has prevented this. Her selfishness and insecurity about "losing her son" has caused her entire side of the family (including the other brother and his wife) to have a more distant, less loving relationship.
Coming from a line of hard-working, inspiring women, I find it sad that Korean women are so obsessed with washing the dishes and criticizing people for domestic housewife duties. If they had true meaning in their lives, they wouldn't have time for this, and they wouldn't have time to meddle in their sons' lives either.
Now that I have realized this, my opinion on my Korean MIL has changed. I used to get upset by her, but now I just see her for what she is - pathetic.
- May 11, 2011 at 6:24 PM
i think terrible mother in law are universal, my sister used to be married to this complete loser who cant stand up to her, sorry, his mother. when he cheated on her six month into the marriage, she instructed him to empty out their bank account as well as try to claim half of matrimony assets, despite she put more in. in really hope this women die of most painful form of cancer
- July 13, 2011 at 9:52 AM
I can't believe there's actually a website about KMIL's - and to see a post in 2011!!! LOL I was happily able to read everyone's stories and relate to some of them. I'm full korean (born and raised in the states) and my bf is korean also. My bf and I are thinking about marriage.... and, not a surprise, but his mom acts like a "13 year old bratt" like stated in another post up there. She's "jealous" or "afraid" that im taking her son away from her since he told her we're thinking about marriage. She'll have family dinners and etc, but wont mention to invite me over. It's not as extreme as some of the other stories above, but I sense a strong negative vibe. We had dinner one time, and she would ask my bf questions about me when i'm sitting right there! for example "she doesn't eat meat!?" When we met them at the restaurant, I got up to greet her and she just walked right passed me and said "oh, u're here" without even looking at me. My bf keeps saying that it's because she doesn't know me.. but reading all the horror stories above, i'm traumatized!! It kinda makes me think twice about this marriage. A little advice would be great. *shrugs*
- July 22, 2011 at 2:11 AM
Thank you Jesus for this blog!!!! My fiancé is half Korean and we have just has our third child together. His Father met his Korean mother in the Korean war, married her and they moved to the states. Since then they had 3 sons 1 of which recently passed away and the father has passed also. His mother plays the " I don't understand english card and claims people make fun of her because she doesnt understand anything and that she looks funny" WTF really? The B**** understands. She doesn't even drive. She relies on my fiancé and his brother for everything. She is obsessed with playing the slots and buying shit and letting you know how much it coats. She talks about me to my fiancé and makes me look like the asshole and is mean to me when no one is looking so people think I'm crazy when I talk about how she treats me. Just this morning she called my fiancé and told him she bought us lots of dish towels and soap for our kitchen because im not cleansing enough and she is worried our kids will get sick. WTF. Also last thanksgiving I offered to do her makeup(bc sh has really bad tattoo makeup and I'm an esthetician/makeup artist) well what does she do? She wiped it off claiming he cheek bones make her face look too funny. UGH this woman drives woman drives me crazy I dont even want my kids around her!! I wish she would move back to Korea! Oh and BtW she totally has my fiancé brainwashed claiming she gave up everything for him so he has to tAke care of her.... So annoyed and prob wouldnt even marry him if it wasn't for our 3 children
- July 23, 2011 at 12:24 PM
I married a Korean man. Responding to Anon's post on July 22, 2011 - if you are not married yet to this man, run as fast as you can. I don't see how it will get better after you guys are married. Korean moms are FULL OF DRAMA. They create something out of nothing and they are very a demanding. They do want you to become their slaves. It probably doesn't help that they watch so much Korean dramas. If you marry a Korean man, just expect to have to share your man with his mom.
- July 25, 2011 at 10:59 PM
"When we met them at the restaurant, I got up to greet her and she just walked right passed me and said "oh, u're here" without even looking at me."
Wow, my MIL did the EXACT same thing the morning after our wedding! She started calling my husband around 9am, so we invited them to join for breakfast. My first encounter with her as daughter-in-law was zero eye contact and walking away from me. Sigh... if you boyfriend is supportive and acknowledges the problem, it's tolerable. If he's not willing to stand up to her, then, unfortunately, it can really strain your marriage.
- July 26, 2011 at 3:07 PM
My Korean mother-in-law went to prison for prostitution for being a madam and making loads of money off others' sex. When she got out, she had no where to go but our house. She is also the person who gave her son, my husband, up for adoption when he was 7 1/2 years old (and remembers it all). She wasn't poor when she gave him up. She's just an awful person.
She was like poison the moment she stepped into our home. My husband and I talked about divorce every day for 8 months in a row, the time she lived at our home. My husband foolishly wasted over $ 20,000 on her and gambling, which he borrowed. We will be paying that back for years.
She criticized me until I cried most days. She intentionally started fights between my husband and me. She called me b**** in my home while we paid all her bills. She paid no bills, spending all her money on gambling. My kids were in tears many days too.
She lied so many times to my husband that our marriage is not the same and will never be the same. My roof has holes and rain pours through in 2 places, but instead we are paying off $20,000 gambling debt of MIL's and husband's. Yes, Korean MIL was the highest rank gambler who encouraged my husband to gamble. He had never had a gambling problem before. Now he does.
Life is never going to be the same again. I can't afford anything nice for myself because I'm paying her huge debt that we can't afford. I'm in tears right now.
I wish she would leave our lives forever and let us be happy. If any of you would enjoy a person like this, let me know. I can deliver her to your home promptly. :(
If Korean culture had anything to do with this, please spread the word that this MIL behavior destroys lives.
- August 10, 2011 at 6:07 AM
- Tammi said...
My bf is Korean/Black. His mother has lived in the US for at least the past 28 years. From the first day i met this woman she has done nothing but criticize everything i do. From what I wear (im quite conservative) to why i come to visit my boyfriend so much. We're in a long distance relationship. She is completely manipulative and plays the denial and overly emotional role when they get into it by crying. I see right through her. Anyhow...I've started to stand up to her and respond in a respectful but yet firm and honest manner. She has responded well to it possibly because she's used to everyone else folding under her. Well Im not doing anymore. This is about my happiness as well. My main question is...are any of you in a situation where your bf is 100% financially responsible for his mother. She lives with him currently and while she claims she will move back to Korea once he gets married, I dont buy it. He's her only child and very much so attached. Ive already told him that she cannot live with us. But being so, this means that we have to bare the financial living costs. I never pictured when i got married id be taking care of an able-body. Dont get me wrong, i understand doing so if parents are not able to take care of themselves but this lady does just fine. Our expenses would be increased by at least $1400/month which IMO will become a heavy burden especially when kids come into the picture. I do well for myself single and so does he but taking on this other element in addition to our on future family seems too much. Does anyone else have any advice to offer or dealing with this???
- September 20, 2011 at 1:07 PM
LOL, wow. To everyone complaining about KMILs...sorry...you have to literally just live with it. No change is comin'.
- November 8, 2011 at 2:39 PM
- NathanJi said...
I married to a Korean man and he is the younger son. I haven't felt more abused and used since I joined their family. My KMIL believes that only her and her sons are family and anytime my husband tries to translate for me or asks me if something is okay they tell him he looks like a dumb shit and that he doesn't need to talk to me. My husband and I work at their restaurant 7 days a week and have no life but still his brother and mother talk about how horrible we are even though we pay for her rent and her food. If she gets anger she screams at my husband about how no one cares about and that he talks to me to much and doesn't pay attention to her. His brother tells my husband all the time how proud he is because he ignores his wife and pays attention to his mother. I even told my husband I had thought about buying a ticket and going home (We live in the US). I have cried and can't sleep because I am so stressed. It has gotten so bad that when his brother comes over my stomach hurts and I feel sick. I am so glad I am not the only one. I felt so alone, but now that I found these posts it makes me so happy.
- November 11, 2011 at 1:13 PM
been married for almost 3 years now and really felt good to finally prove my reactions towards my manipulative korean MIL who babies her sons (she has 2 sons and my hubby is the eldest.. and that really drives the shit out of me)are infact normal contradictory to what she and my hubby says,, whew!!!! I hope they just both get married and live forever together..lolzzz... So in hell now,, I'm not Korean and I don't wanna be one and join them with their weird way of thinking about things. I'm always thinking about leaving my husband and going back to my country... all because of his mom whose too much kindness spoils our marriage. For God's sake!!!! She is not the center of our relationship! Her son already got married to me!!! she should give us some space but she squeezes herself into our marriage than poisons our relationship!!!! and my fool husband falls to her poisonous sort of kindness,,,ewwwww!!!!!!!!!!! I really want to leave this crazy Korea if not just because of my baby,, I'm really patient, kind and understanding to take up all my MIL's craziness but my hubby just don't see it because he is blinded by his mom's foolish teachings.. ah~~~ making my life meaningless.. wanna runaway everyday and get a real life,, don't want to be part of this drama..( well Korean dramas usually end up with sb dying and I don't wanna to be that character) Stress kills..and really makes me sick everyday,, damn!
- December 8, 2011 at 2:11 PM
I also have problem with KMIL too. She brain washed my husband. Although I haven't seen her a lot as we don't live in Korea, but still problems. I don't care much about how she lied to my husband about me, and tried to get my husband goes against me. I have told my husband about my feeling towards her. My MIL is a complete b***h,can't stand her. Whatever you guys mentioned are all in that woman.
- January 17, 2012 at 8:04 AM
- hb lee said...
This site is such a lucky find. My KM is gravely ill and will soon pass and I sit here at her bedside celebrating her and her KM ways. Thank you Chiyo
- February 10, 2012 at 8:02 AM
I live in the us, I had Korean bosses at my old job and i feel sorry for their future daughter in law already. They have an older daughter and a son, the older daughter was crazy busy with grad school and the son was lazying around. One of them would call the busy daughter in the morning just to tell her to heat the breakfast for the son and give her a list of things she needs to take care of. She's waiting for her daughter to get a job with six figure salary and marry a guy with the same so she can live off of them, I know because she would say it out loud. As for their son they let him have his box of condoms as long as he doesn't impregnate the girls (they said this out loud) and hopes that one day they'll have an angel daughter in law who makes good money to be on call 24/7 at their whim.
We were working with a tiny company owned by a korean, that company owner's daughter in law was helping them out. My ex boss made a really rude comment few seconds after the daughter in law walked by " look at where she's working, she's a korean college grad and she works at that company."
- February 23, 2012 at 10:15 AM
Sympathy to everyone suffering from unfair treatment!
My bf and I have been together for 3 years and his mom hates me and demands him to break up with me or get out of the family. My bf's dad passed right before we got together, I was trying my best to support him and comfort as much as I could. I gave up on my career and moved to another country (my bf and I were studying in Switzerland). I moved only for him, to be with him and his mom doesn't approve me even being his gf. I do not want to marry him or anything, I just love him.
Why do korean guys feel good about pouring sh..t their lovely mom are talking behind our backs? Does it make them feel loved and taken care of?
- February 24, 2012 at 2:47 AM
I'm a Western woman livin in Korea,n married to a Korean. I've been livin in Korea for 5 years, and my husband and I dated for 3 yrs before we decided to get married 1year ago. Durin the 3 yrs we were datin(before marriage), I met his family several times and I even went to his parents' house several times. Durin those 3 yrs, though I couldnt feel a very warm welcome from them, I still found they were nice and polite to me, and they didnt get opposed to us being a couple. So I thought his family wasnt bad.But surprisingly, everythg changed when we actually got married. When we got married, I already had known his family for 3 years, so I thought I knew them well. But I was wrong.I didnt know their REAL face. After we got married, his family's attitude towards me totally changed. I realized that during 3 years, they hadnt shown me their real face, but only a mask, because i was not officially a member of their family. But as soon as i got married,I became officially a member of their family, so they just threw all the masks away and started to show me their real face. That was scary actually. As soon as i got married, I got to understand that his mother actually didnt like me, though i used to think that she did during those 3 years. And also another thing : during those 3 years of dating, while his mother kept welcoming me in her house from times to times, she NEVER thought that our relationship would be so serious and that we would get married in the end. She thought some day my BF would break up with me for some reason, because I was a foreigner,so she couldnt even think of us really getting married. That is why she always said that she was not against our marriage, because actually she thought we were not serious about it and it wouldnt happen in the end. So she just said ok, no problem to it, but she didnt really think it. When we really decided to get married after 3 years, she couldnt say no, because she had been welcomin me in her house for 3years. So she said yes. But as soon as we got married, she started to make me live evryday like hell. She told me that she was "disappointed" that her son married a foreign girl and that she would had prefered a korean daughter-in-law who would know everything about what a daughter in law has to do, and not a foreigner to whom she has to teach everything.She couldnt admit that the little mistakes i made were not on purpose but just because of my cultural difference, because i had received a totally different education in my childhood in another country. In the 1st month after our wedding, i made little mistakes, because i didnt know that such or such thing had to be done differently in Korea. So when i made a mistake, I apologized to her, saying "I am sorry. i didnt do that on purpose. I never meant to bother you. It is just that in our country things are done differently so i didnt know that i was making a mistake. If you would just teach me how to do in a nice way, it would help me to make less mistakes. Since I am a foreigner, I can not know EVERYTHING about korean family life, I try to know as much as i can, and i study a lot about it, but there are things that i will learn slowly with time, and i need that little time to adapt" . When i said that, she replied to me: "Look. I dont care that UR a foreigner. Now that U got married and entered our family, you are not a foreigner anymore, Ok?? You are korean now! U must B korean! i dont want to hear that UR a foreigner and had another culture or education! you have to forget everythg about your past in your country. Everything about your country or culture doesnt count. And we dont care about it. We dont even want to hear about it. Now UR korean so you must act like a korean. And you must make no mistakes. If there are things U dont know, it's your fault. You are ignorant. Not my fault. So i dont have to teach U or explain things to U. U must know things by yourself. Dont make excuses ok??" . She actually yelled that at me.
- March 9, 2012 at 12:51 AM
I am so into this too....I wish all the women who wrote things here could live in my area and we could meet and talk about it together and then all go to a nolaebang and throw all this stress away...^^~ LOL
- March 9, 2012 at 12:53 AM
If he really defended you he would save you the trouble, and punch her in that nasty mouth of hers. I don't care where you come from. Nobody deserves to be treated like that and she should be held accountable for her words and actions.
-Fed Up
- April 3, 2012 at 9:24 AM
- Jadujen said...
Whoa. I am so sorry for all of those girls who are suffering as a a result of KMIL behavior. I know that there are a lucky rare few who have kind ones, but more common is the kind of KMIL who is abusive in so many ways.
I am SO lucky, & glad, that my KMIL is no longer in the States with us. When people read others' horror stories of the hell they are living in, I think they don't get it unless they've really experienced it. It's AWFUL, & definitely more widespread in Korean culture, sadly.
For about 2-3 years I had the joy of experiencing ridiculously childish, psychotically selfish, and crazy-to-the point-of-laughable behavior of my lovely Korean m-i-l. I think it's even more hellish because the treatment is so focused & targeted. And because even when your Korean husband konws his mother is being a bitch, or tries to stand up to her, there are still weird demands/expectations for him to uphold, or try to follow, so he's not "a terrible son".
There are bad mother in laws the world over. But Korean ones have distinct common traits (well, that are apparently also common in other Asian countries!). They really do think it's fine to aim to live off of you; expect you to be at their command, be their slave; criticize you be aggressively rude to you, disrespect and demean you, etc.
Now that it's been a while since I've had the painfully rude m-i-l in my face, I almost forget how nightmarish it can be! I think someone should start a support group in whatever cities they're in~or even a message board...so that people can just share what's going on with them, and KNOW that other people are dealing with this bullshit too!!
Because it can really mess up your head, when you love your boyfriend/husband very much, and as a consequence, have to be subjected to such medieval, barbaric behavior.
- April 13, 2012 at 12:50 AM
SO relieved to find this blog. I WAS engaged to a 1/2 Korean man (born and raised in the U.S... white dad, South Korean mom). I firmly believe that Korean women are the spawn of the devil. A Korean mother-in-law will make your life a living hell, especially if you have children. If you are dating someone with a Korean mother, RUN. RUN AS FAST AS YOU CAN. All the stereotypes about Korean women are true! Korean mothers are obsessed with their sons, usually to the point of an unhealthy bond. Korean women expect to be pampered, but they also are extremely controlling and end up "wearing the pants" in any relationship. They are highly materialistic. They refuse to work - Lord have mercy on you if you are a working Mom; you will never stop hearing judgments from your Korean mother-in-law. In the Korean culture, a daughter-in-law is expected to be subservient to the mother-in-law. She will never send you gifts or do kind things for you. Korean women are STUBBORN AS HELL. They refuse to learn English (even if they've lived here 40+ years) but they want all the American conveniences. They are obsessed with image. They will judge everything about you, especially your housekeeping and child-rearing abilities. You will never be good enough. Please, do yourself a favor and marry someone with American parents. Avoid the Korean culture entirely.
- April 28, 2012 at 12:08 PM


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James Holmes trial timeline
Published On: Jul 20 2012 07:15:59 AM PDT Updated On: Jul 22 2015 07:32:06 AM PDT
The month-long penalty phase of the trial of James Holmes, who could be sentenced to death for killing 12 people in a Colorado movie theater, is set to begin Wednesday. Here are images from his court appearances and the 2012 shooting inside an Aurora movie theater.
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subset: commoncrawl


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Help is being organized for family after fire
BARRE A local restaurant is serving as a drop spot for those interested in helping members of a young Barre Town family who lost almost everything in a Wednesday morning fire that destroyed their Phelps Road home.
With Damian Barnett, Kaysie Breer and their four children Matthew, 10, Lindsey, 5, Colin, 2, and Camdyn, 6 months temporarily staying at the Comfort Inn in the wake of the devastating fire, The Cornerstone Pub & Kitchen is collecting clothing, toys and gift cards for the family.
Clothing sizes include: mens 32/34 pants and extra-large tops; womens size 14 pants and extra-large tops; boys size 10/12; girls size 5/6; boys size 2T; and girls size 6/9 months.
Owners of the Cornerstone, which is in the historic Aldrich Block at the corner of North Main and Elm streets, have been in contact with the family and arranged to serve as a collection point for donations.
Meanwhile, Sue Poczobut, chief executive officer of Granite Hills Credit Union, is working with the family to establish a secure account for financial contributions. She hoped to have those details worked out by the end of the day today.
Barre Town Fire Chief Chris Violette said Wednesday that a state fire investigator would try to determine the cause of the blaze, which he said drew firefighters from six communities.
The fire appeared to have started in the homes basement area, filling it with thick smoke before quickly burning through the first and second floors on its way to the roof.
No one was injured, and Barnett said he got the familys dogs out safely.MORE IN Central VermontStudents harming teachers is a little-explored issue at the state level. Full StoryThe state will get support in defending its end-of-life choice law, which several religious... Full StoryVermonts largest and smallest summer theater companies are the first to announce their 2017... Full Story
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Drop-off locations will be open Saturday and have extended hours on election day to accommodate voters in the Aug. 10 primary election.
Only voters who are affiliated with a party can vote. Ballots are going out to Republicans, Democrats and Libertarians. Unaffiliated voters can declare an affiliation up to Election Day.
Blue Spruce Kiwanis of Evergreen has proposed a bandstand/pavilion next to the Evergreen Lake House, but the rec district board has mixed opinions on the idea and is pondering a public meeting to discuss it.
Board member Mark Footer opposes building such a structure.
"The striking thing is the view and the natural environment. I think the bandstand would undermine that. Less is more in this case," Footer said. "I know there's a push for a playground. It's a big green space. It is what it is."
Lisa and Bryan Carter moved to Peggy Lane in Evergreen Park Estates two years ago because they wanted to be closer to nature. They found the perfect small house on an acre of land at the edge of Jeffco open space.
The couple were aware that their land bordered publicly owned open space, but what they didn't know until last week was that the Jeffco Open Space Division planned to build a mile-long fence along the boundary line from Buffalo Park Road on the north to Cliff Road on the south. The fence will be about 25 feet from the Carters' back door.
Firefighters were at the scene of a blaze on open land south of Morrison on Monday afternoon.
The fire, near C-470 and U.S. 285, was being pushed north along the Hogback by strong winds.
The on-ramp from Morrison Road to eastbound C-470 was closed.
Although spring migration has long been over, we had a bit of excitement in the yard this week.
The house wrens have long been nesting in a swallow box on the supporting post of the front porch. In fact, they are feeding young. Although it is supposed to be a swallow box, the swallows have never had a chance to use it because the wrens arrive earlier and have already taken it over. They usually have eggs in the box by the time the violet-green swallows arrive. That was the case this year.
Did you ever have a really great teacher? Someone who changed your life?
I've been lucky to have more than one. In elementary school, I wasn't the easiest kid — you could say I was pretty tough. These days I'd surely be diagnosed with ADD (actually, to say I had an attention deficit is a huge understatement). But Mrs. Arnold and Mrs. Ballangee stuck with me. It would have been easy to ignore this rowdy kid, but they put in extra hours, helping me learn what I couldn't have learned on my own. I'm grateful they did.
Almost a third of the land owned by Jeffco's airport would be commercially developed under an unprecedented plan in which any ultimate profits would be split with a private firm based in Denver.
Details of a contract for the joint venture, the first public-private partnership land deal in Jefferson County's 148-year history, may not be finalized for months.
Jeffco treasurer candidate Larry Schulz boasts 44 years of public service — all of which he attributes to childhood allergies. Schulz, incumbent treasurer for the city of Wheat Ridge, was headed for a life in agriculture until fits of sneezing prodded him toward higher education and a career away from his family's farm.
"I grew up on a dairy farm in southeastern Minnesota," said Schulz, 66. "I learned about hard work there, and about honesty."
Republican Tim Kauffman was working as a commercial banker when he was called in 2008 and asked to replace newly elected Commissioner Faye Griffin as Jeffco treasurer. And though he was not new to politics, it took a bit of coaxing before he agreed to fill the office.
"My phone rang after the election in 2008. … They kept calling, and I realized this might be a really good fit," said Kauffman, 42, a Westminster resident who served on the city council for seven years, four of which he was mayor pro tem.
Republican Congressman Mike Coffman, up for re-election to a potential second term in November, paints himself as a distinct partisan politician, one unmistakably different from Democratic challenger John Flerlage in Colorado's 6th District.
"This race is not about two Marines campaigning against each other but one where a conservative Republican and a liberal Democrat happen to be running for the same office," Coffman said in an e-mail to the Courier. "We are polar opposites, and the
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Canyon Courier is your source for local news, sports, events, and information in Evergreen, Colo, and the surrounding area.


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Product Description
This design is a variation on the ever-popular Blenko Glass Water Bottle. Gentle ribbing in the blown glass gives this piece some visual depth, as well as more surface area to catch and reflect the light.
This classic design is perfect for holding cold beverages, a bouquet of flowers, rooting plant cuttings, or simply to stand in a windowsill, letting natural light shine through the beautiful hand blown glass.
Pale purple glass. 8 in. tall; holds 36 oz.
Blenko Glass Company of Milton, West Virginia.
Artist information included.


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Urchins claim thrilling overtime win
The Urchins had a dramatic finish to its second game of the season, coming away with a 52-50 overtime win at Biggersville on Friday. A game chock full of two-point conversions ended with quarterback D.J. Armstrong calling two plays that gave the Urchins its second victory.
"Our boys never quit and they played very well," East Union head coach Scott Duley said. "We didn't do anything different as coaches in the last four minutes of the game, and the kids took control of the game in the end of the fourth quarter. They weren't going to be denied, and it just shows again that football is a game of emotion as well as skill."
Neither team capitalized on turnovers in the first quarter, as East Union had an interception and Biggersville a fumble recovery, and the Lions opened the second quarter with a touchdown and a successful two-point conversion, the first of many, but was shortly answered with an East Union touchdown from Broderick Montgomery and two-point conversion to tie the game at eight.
Biggersville scored an unanswered six points to close the half leading 14-8, after an East Union touchdown was called back after a holding call.
Duley said he told his players at half time that if they came back out and played hard, they could win.
I don't know how many of them believed me," he said, "but they all believe me now."
Montgomery scored his second touchdown early in the third quarter, but the Urchins were unable to come up with more points after an interception by Vadale Rucker. The Lions scored a touchdown and two-point conversion with a minute left in the third to lead 22-16.
Biggersville scored another eight points in the first few minutes of the fourth quarter with East Union answering with their own less than a minute later. Then just a minute after that, Biggersville scored after a 68 yard run, giving the Lions a 36-22 lead going into the final four minutes of the game.
Montgomery came up with another touchdown for the Urchins, but the two-point conversion was missed, and the Urchins trailed 36-28. Biggersville had a long run of 78 yards on the ensuing drive to extend its lead to 44-28.
Quarterback D.J. Armstrong ran in a touchdown with just over a minute left in the game. That plus another two-point conversion brought the score to 44-36 with Biggersville leading.
The Urchins recovered a fumble by the Lions with 30 seconds left on the game clock, and two pass interference penalties against the Lions brought East Union closer to the goal line. Armstrong's pass was intercepted with no time left on the clock, but the play was called back due to a penalty against Biggersville, and the Urchins made the best of it, as Armstrong audibled two plays leading to a touchdown and two-point conversion to tie the game at 44 with no time left on the clock.
"He about gave me a heart attack there, but he did a great job," Duley said of Armstrong.
The Urchins went first in overtime and came up with eight points. Biggersville answered with a touchdown, but was unable to complete its final two-point conversion, leading to the win for the Urchins.
East Union will face Mantachie next week in their first home game of the season.
–Story by Josh Presley
About Chris Elkins
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Collect photos, maps, memories and books of interest to you.
Memories of Boscombe
St George's Youth Club Haviland Road
Oh how I remember St George's Youth Club , My Sister [ Diane ] and I lived in Haviland Road , and we sometimes went to SGYC , so many memoirs , we loved Kings Park where we spent many hours on the swings ,Slide etc , Also spent fun times in Shelly Park , We now live in different parts of the world Diane ...Read full memory
A 1969 Student
For a very enjoyable year I lived at no 17 in Florence Road, a turning halfway down to the beach and off Sea road in Boscombe (see photo). I became one of the first persons in the country to study for a Higher National Diploma in Tourism. My college was then called Bournemouth College of Technology, situated at the Lansdowne, ...Read full memory
St Georges Youth Club
I was born in 1931. In 1944 until 1952 I lived at the Police Station in Gloucester Road where my father was a Police Inspector. As a regular member of the Youth Club, I have great memories of cycle trips into the New Forest, Friday night dances, and the memorable 'Skipper'. Another member was Bill Wrigley who with ...Read full memory
Woodland Avenue
My parents Evelyn and Tom Williams purchased a Guest House on Woodland Avenue around 1946-7 while I was just a toddler.


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Anybody of Oriental descent who has stayed in London for over a week will have known about Four Seasons already, unless s/he has: 1) no social contacts, 2) no interest in food whatsoever or 3) been staying with the mythical crocodiles in the London sewers the whole time. During my time in A levels, anybody who made a short trip to London (about 3.5 hours single way) was obliged to bring back some of the legendary roast duck for his/her friends who had to endure months of canteen college food.
Our love affair with Four Seasons continued well into our university days, meeting up quite often to mingle, exchange stories and to eat food of course. Such was its popularity that if you a good enough social network, you were bound to meet a friend (or acquaintance or random person you met in class) while queuing up. Oh yes the queues were terrible too; 30 to 60 minutes outside in the cold were the norm on weekends. They did have a booking system (kind of), but it merely bumped you to the top of the waiting list and you still had to wait for the current occupants of the table to vacate it. And you were only allowed to sit if all members of the party were present. Being Malaysian, our national viewpoint of punctuality was that being an hour tardy was still acceptable. It doesn't help prevent the gastric juices oozing out standing outside the glass window watching endless rows of roast duck being skilfully deboned.
Located in the "other Chinatown" of Bayswater, it was easy to find, but parking on the other hand can be a bit difficult. We went at 6pm to "beat the queue" on a Saturday evening but still ended up queuing for 30 minutes.
Inside, we got the table nearest the entrance which meant that the whole dinner we endured the jealous looks of people still queuing.
Naturally, ordering at least half a roast duck from the "Roast Duck Specialists" (as it says on the menu) was a must, it was the main reason why we went back again after a year's absence. The meat was tender yet full of duck flavour and the skin was crunchy, but the main difference between this and other restaurants was the sauce; it was amazingly rich and full of Chinese herbs and spices. The restaurant tends to debone the duck lately unless you tell them otherwise (I prefer not to as I feel it's nicer to chew meat off the bone) and I suspect its because they need the duck carcasses to make the duck sauce.
We also had a small plate of siew yuk (烧肉) - roast belly pork. Our group of friends rarely order this in London but Four Seasons makes one of the better ones here. The meat was mixed with just enough fat to give it taste and make it tender, not too oversalted, and most importantly the skin was still crispy at 6.30pm.
The jiu yim sin yao (椒盐鲜鱿) - deep fried squid with salt and chillies is one of my favourite dishes (all the dishes today were amongst my favourites really). Quite simple dish really, squid in batter deep fried with salt, chillies n and chopped garlic, best eaten hot from the wok. Unfortunately, my friend The Suckling Pig complained that eating deep fried food on a hot summers day (20 degrees outside *sigh*) wasn't ideal.
Jiu pai tofu (招牌豆腐) - tofu, house specialty style, epitomised the style of Hong Kong style cooking: lots of sauce, lots of starch in the sauce (it helps fill you up, and its cheap, so more starch = fuller customers at lower costs), strong flavours, (un)healthy amounts of oil.
Anyway the tofu has been blended with some other secret ingredients and moulded into egg shaped balls then laid on a bed of green vegetables ladled with an oyster based sauce. The tofu had a softly springy texture and was already very tasty on its own.
For the obligatory token vegetable dish, we chose baby pak choy with garlic. Cooked with some oyster sauce, it was nothing special but done efficiently, not overcooked yet not raw.
We ate all the above with some plain white rice but unsurprisingly, we couldn't finish it and ended up taking away the leftovers. The PigPig loved the lat chiu yau (辣椒油) - chilli oil here before, but they seemed to have changed brands since we last came. When we finished, a waiter quickly came and took away the dishes, changed the tablecloths and gave us some complimentary sliced oranges to clean our palate.
Now for some reason, as anybody who has gone to one of these old-school Chinese restaurants will know, the service is really bad. In essence, their priority is to get us the food quickly and once we finish, to get us out quickly too. Any lingering after completing our meal will be quickly challenged by the waiters. There are also lots of comments online that the waiters don't explain the dishes well to non-Chinese people so they find it difficult to order things we usually order and up ordering the usual stuff like Peking Duck, sweet and sour pork, sweetcorn soup.
Anyway all that food (which could really feed four or five people) along with a can of Tiger beer and Chinese tea came up to just under £60.
Food - 5.5
Service - 4.0
Atmosphere - 5.0
Value - 6.5
I personally think that for standard Chinese fare, this restaurant does it the best. Forget Chinatown as I feel that most of them are tourist traps and they have survived so long because there is always another sucker coming around the corner. Obviously this isn't "posh" Chinese food but there are lots of newer places that cater to the more upmarket crowd in London. Four Seasons is very much a place that university students love, because its good food for good value and students are much more tolerable of poor service.
Extra things:
- This has absolutely nothing to do with the Four Seasons hotel chain.
- They have a branch in Chinatown but my friends tell me to avoid it and to stick to the original.
- A few doors down is a restaurant called Gold Mine and apparently the "original" chef and manager left Four Seasons to set it up. The food there is pretty good, but the duck at Four Seasons still feels better. The Pigpig however can't really tell the difference between the two in terms of the meat but thinks that the sauce at Four Seasons definitely tastes better.


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Freedom New Mexico
Women of the Church of God-Anderson are selling cookbooks to raise money for the group's activities.
The money will fund activities, missions and Christmas baskets for the underprivileged.
Paula Stevens with the group said cookbooks are made up of local recipes from Portales, Melrose, Clovis and Friona. They are $12 and can be purchased by contacting Stevens at 693-7658.
DJ Ministries will perform during the church's morning worship service 10:45 p.m. Sunday.
The church is at 3719 21st St.


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Private debt in America far exceeds national debt
Well, Ms. Ruckle could be wrong about a large amount of Americans. 66 percent of citizens own homes with an average mortgage debt of $200,000. 40 percent have at least one credit card with a balance of $15,799. All of this adds up, one way or another, to a significant debt overhang for the average American family.
Certainly there are people who are largely debt free such as the poor who typically rent and often cannot obtain credit cards. So too, senior citizens who have paid off their houses and carry little or no real debt. Still others rent and may have a reduced debt portfolio.
This is all well and good, but the private debt in America far exceeds the national government debt and our ability to pay it down is limited. The average median income in the U.S. is $53,762 of which 34 percent is disposable. That works out to $15,518 a year or $298 a week. How long would it take to pay down the average mortgage or credit card debt if you devoted that extra money for that purpose?
That also means not saving for a rainy day, unexpected home or auto repairs, medical deductibles, vacations or just lunch with your co-workers. What part of that sounds tenable or realistic?
But if you own a house, you have equity in the form of increased value of your property. It is no different for the government when bonds, loans and budget authorizations are made for schools, roads and other infrastructure. And all of these items maintain and increase your personal property value as well. They also enhance your future through the educated youth of today becoming the political and business leaders of tomorrow.
Just as we use our disposable income to accomplish minor repairs on our dwellings, so too do we occasionally increase our debt more substantially through home equity loans, credit cards and private loans to tackle bigger repairs lest we have our house collapse around us.
Certainly no one wants errant, drunken sailor spending by our elected officials but to suddenly set some arbitrary, non-negotiable cap on government spending seems fanciful. To succeed you would need to impose worldwide wage and price caps to prevent any need for changes in economic spending. The entire UN cannot agree on whether it was a sunny day or not, what chance do you think that will have?
We need honesty not platitudes, threats and posturing by all parties in Washington. There will always be debt as a nation of 313 million people occupying a land mass of 3,794,100 square miles, equaling 8.3 percent of the earth, with 4,045,000 miles of roads, trains and waterways, bordered by 52,000,000,000,000,000 gallons of water on three sides and susceptible to weather from the near Arctic to the sub tropical and everything in between because "Stuff happens." Beyond that we are the sharp end of a beacon of liberty in a world that still has many dark corners, a responsibility we cannot shirk, while counting pennies.


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IL046: Attack of the Prehistoric Pokémon
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Attack of the Prehistoric Pokémon (ふっかつ!? かせきポケモン! Revival!? Fossil Pokémon!) is the 46th episode of Pokémon: Indigo League.
To prove his rival, Gary, that he can find a fossil, Ash finds Team Rocket attempting to blow a canyon. In the chase to prevent the explosion, Pikachu accidentally blows the explosives, making his trainer and Team Rocket in the cave below the canyon. There, they find some fossil Pokémon, from which an Aerodactyl wants them to be its lunch. Attempting to defeat it, Ash's Charmeleon goes through an evolution...
Episode Plot
The group continue on their way and notice people digging for fossils in Grandpa Canyon. Gary Oak shows up for this too. Ash wants to dig for fossils so that he can find a better fossil than Gary. Gary finds a fossil and an archaeologist examines it. Gary thinks it's the brain of an extinct Pokémon but the professor says it's a Pokémon coprolite fossil (fossilized Pokémon manure).
Meanwhile, Team Rocket plants bombs in the canyon so they can find fossils quicker. Ash notices this just as Meowth lights the fuse. Ash and Squirtle chase it trying to put out the fuse. It gets to the end and Pikachu shoots an electric beam at it in panic. The blast goes off and Ash, Team Rocket, and Pikachu find themselves underground. Squirtle is the only one who escapes quickly enough. Misty and Brock hear the explosion and they run over to it and they find Squirtle. Misty, Brock, and Squirtle quickly start digging to find Ash and Team Rocket.
Meanwhile, Ash and Team Rocket try to find a way out. They meet some ancient Pokémon who they thought to be extinct. Jessie and James say that the blast must have woken up Pokémon that have been sleeping for 1,000 years.The ancient Pokémon are jealous at Ash and Team Rocket for waking them up, so they attack but suddenly run off. They are happy the Pokémon left but then they realize why they left: an Aerodactyl appears, grabs Ash, and swoops up into the air.
Meanwhile, Geodude has finally found a hole leading into the cave. A crowd has come to help dig for Ash and Team Rocket. Suddenly, the Aerodactyl flies up out of the hole with Ash in its mouth. Charmeleon wants to battle Aerodactyl,and shows a scratch Aerodactyl made on his face and said to apologize, but the Pokémon taunts Charmeleon. Upset but really Angry, Charmeleon struggled and began to evolve. Everyone watchs as Charmeleon evolves into a Charizard. Charizard flies and chases Aerodactyl. Charizard uses Flamethrower on Aerodactyl, but misses. Ash feels Charizard has feelings for Ash, and to save him, Charmeleon evolved, but when his Flamethrower burnt Ash, he recognized that Charmeleon had only evolved for taking revenge upon Aerodactyl.
Misty sees Jigglypuff and asks it to sing so Aerodactyl will fall asleep and drop Ash Jigglypuff happily starts singing. Aerodactyl falls asleep and drops Ash. Ash is caught by Charizard who managed to stay awake. Officer Jenny tells everyone that it was just a dream caused by Jigglypuff's song and sends the people on their way. Ash gets an egg from the site, which Brock steals from him to take care of.
| This article has an incomplete plot or synopsis.
Reason: N/A
Please help the Pokémon Wiki by expanding it.
- Each of Gary's cheerleaders had the letters A-F written on their faces while they were asleep.
- Gary found an example of a Pokémon Coprolite fossil.
- The "Who's that Pokémon?" in this episode is Kabutops.
- This episode shows the first carnivorous Pokémon and the first time a Pokémon has actually tried to eat a human.
- When Ash is attempting to put out the fuse lit by Team Rocket, they roll into a boulder, similar to Raiders of the Lost Ark.
- Gary is dressed up just like Indiana Jones.
- Team rocket sang rock a bye bay at the end of the episode.
When Ash fell down sleeping, the egg that was found was discolored with red circles, when it should have been with blue circles.
In one scene where Charizard is flying, it's wings turn cream-yellow instead of blueish green
|Pokémon: The Original
|Other series: Advanced Generation · Diamond & Pearl · Best Wishes! · XY · Sun & Moon


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Boston mob trial reverberates in Vt.By Brent Curtis
STAFF WRITER | June 22,2013Provided Photo
The late Louis Lapiana is seen in a family photo with Diane Sussman de Tennen after he was paralyzed..Louis Lapiana wasnt supposed to live more than 48 hours after hit men, who federal prosecutors say worked for Boston mobster James Whitey Bulger, severely damaged his spinal cord in a Boston shooting 40 years ago.
Instead, the Rutland native lived for almost three decades and, despite injuries that left him paralyzed from the neck down, he lived a full life, according to his brother.
Everybody knew him, his brother Michael Lapiana of Fair Haven, said Friday. All you had to do was go to the hospital at Long Beach and mention his name. I think he got a wing named after him. He never stopped living.
Louis Lapiana was 35, living in Boston and dating a 23-year-old Californian beauty in March 1973 when he was shot multiple times by gunmen who federal prosecutors say mistakenly targeted the Mercedes Benz he was riding in because it looked like a vehicle belonging to a rival mob boss.
The Mount St. Joseph Academy graduate and U.S. Air Force veteran had moved from Rutland to the big city years earlier in search of work and an adventurous night life, Michael Lapiana said.
He found both by opening Louies Nightclub in Brighton, Mass., and by traveling back and forth to New York to manage a nightclub there.
He enjoyed life, his younger brother recalled. He loved to party.
But during the early-morning hours of March 8, 1973, Lapiana and his friend Michael Milano were looking forward to nothing more exciting than a late-night chess match when a car full of killers rolled up beside them at a traffic light in Boston.
Lapianas spine was severed in the hail of bullets that followed and Milano was killed. Lapianas girlfriend Diane Sussman de Tennen, who was riding in the front seat, was shot in the arm.
The doctors expected Lapiana to die but he didnt. Instead, unable to move or even breathe on his own, he went on to live a full life that his brother said he never would have dreamed possible.
I dont know how many times I asked him how he did it or what he lived for, Michael Lapiana said. He said he would grasp for every breath of life he could get and he said when I was in his situation I would know what he was talking about.
Still, there were many hardships that both Lapiana and his family endured.
Michael Lapiana said the hit put an end to his brothers hopes of one day marrying Sussman de Tennen. The pair remained lifelong friends and Lapiana relocated to Long Beach, Calif., in part to be closer to her and her family.
He told her Youve got no life with me, no future. You need to go on without me, Michael Lapiana said. He didnt want her to feel bad and she did get married and had children but kept him as a friend.
He always loved her. He never stopped loving her but it was difficult times back then. He didnt know if he would live and the doctors told him it would be a miracle if he did, he added.
Lapianas injury also taxed his parents, who used all of their financial resources and left Vermont for California for the good of their son.
My mother and father had to sell everything, Michael Lapiana said. They gave up everything for him and moved to Anaheim because he needed to have family out there before they would move him. My parents drove 20 miles to Long Beach every day.
Lapiana said he too made frequent trips to the West Coast and spoke nightly with his brother on the phone.
He would call me every night at 8 oclock on the button, he said. He was our life. Everyone in my family traveled back and forth all the time just to go and see him.
Decades passed without Louis Lapiana or his family knowing why he was targeted in the hit or who carried it out.
It wasnt until September 1999 two months after the brothers father died and years after the passing of their mother that the family learned that confessed hit man John Martorano had told prosecutors he had carried out the hit on the orders of Bulger.
Martorano testified in Bulgers months-long trial this week that he shot Milano, Lapiana and Sussman de Tennen in a case of mistaken identity. He said Al Indian Al Notarangeli, the leader of a rival group, was the intended target.
In 1999, Martorano agreed to a plea bargain that sent him to jail for 12 years in exchange for his testimony. It was the first time that Michael Lapiana or his brother had heard of the involvement of the hit man or Bulger, who went on the run in 1994.
Weve been waiting a long time and I followed news about Bulger all over the place, Michael Lapiana said about the decade that passed before Bulger was found and arrested in 2011.
His brother didnt live to see that day. He died in 2001 and his remains were returned to his hometown where hes buried between his parents on a plot in Rutlands Calvary Cemetery.
Michael Lapiana hasnt gone to any portion of Bulgers trial Sussman de Tennen testified this week because he doesnt think theres anything he could do or say there that would make a difference in the outcome.
But hes been reading the transcripts and thinking about his brother while the trial plays out.
Far from the least remarkable aspect of his brothers life was his ability to put the past behind him, Michael Lapiana said.
In 1999, after Martorano admitted to his role in the botched hit, Michael Lapiana said his brother told him, I dont hold grudges. Id like to see justice done but Im over it. Im just happy I lived to see who it was.
In an interview with the Rutland Herald in September 1999, Louis Lapiana said, My future was taken away from me but I got over being bitter about my injury. Im enjoying life. This never stopped me.
For Michael Lapiana, letting go of the past is harder. After reading the trial accounts, he said its tough to see how easily the shooting and the course of his brothers life could have been avoided.
But Friday, he said having the 83-year-old Bulger finally held accountable for his crimes would be enough.
I think hes already got the justice he deserved just knowing that they got him, he said. His life and what he went through deserved to be recognized.
@Tagline:firstname.lastname@example.com IN NewsNarration and audio production by RH Alcott Full StoryNarration and audio production by RH Alcott Full Story
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Sullivan legislature calls for fracking health study
Critics of gas drilling and hydraulic fracturing in New York State have long been calling for a study on the possible impacts the process can have on human health. While there is some support for the idea among elected officials in Albany, so far state officials have not been willing to go in that direction.
During the budget process earlier this year, the Assembly specified that $100,000 should be used to pay for such a study, but the senate and Governor Andrew Cuomo removed it from consideration.
Now Sullivan County is adding its voice to a growing number of organizations that are calling for a health impact study. At the government center on April 26, the legislature took up the matter of a non-binding resolution calling for state officials to impose a moratorium on gas drilling and fracking, and to conduct further studies of the process, which should include a public health assessment.
During the public comment period before the vote, Larysa Dyrszka, a retired pediatrician and a member of Sullivan Area Citizens for Responsible Energy Development (SACRED), noted that Sullivan County came in at 61 out of 62 in a recent listing of health rankings of counties in the state, and said the residents of the county could not afford to be exposed to increased air pollution and toxic substances.
On the other side of the issue, Sondra Bauernfeind, the former chair of the Sullivan County Conservative Party, said that according to the Environmental Protection Agency, "there is no danger from fracking, just like climate change; there is no such thing as global warming."
Al Larson, founder of the Bethel Landowners Coalition, noted that the methods of drilling have been greatly improved over the past four or five years, and that economic conditions in the county are not good, and the economic impacts of drilling could benefit residents, as well as local governments.
Bruce Ferguson, a member of Catskill Citizens for Safe Energy, said that the gas industry was building eight liquid natural gas facilities in the country to enable gas to be shipped overseas. He said countries such as France, that have banned fracking because of its danger, would purchase the gas that was produced in this country.
Ultimately, the vote from the nine legislators was unanimous in supporting the resolution.
More money for green
The board also voted to increase the funding for Sullivan Alliance for Sustainable Development (SASD), the non-profit organization that has been serving as a consultant to the county on matters of alternative energy and related matters.
The original agreement called for the county to grant $25,000 for the organization for 2012, the amended agreement calls for that amount to be increased to up to $60,000.
The vote for the increase was eight to one, with legislator Jonathan Rouis voting no because all of the other non-profit organizations that received funds from the county had been asked to accept a 15% reduction this year because of the tight budget and, therefore, the increase for SASD was not equitable.


text:
Pine Bros. Throat Drops Set of 3 Containers
Pine Bros. Throat Drops Are Back, Relieving Sore Throats Just Like When You Were a Kid
Pine Bros. Throat Drops Set of 3 Containers
Pine Bros. Throat Drops Are Back, Relieving Sore Throats Just Like When You Were a Kid
Of all the sore throat treatments out there, moms have continuously reached for Pine Brothers throat lozenges for over 140 years. That's because these all-natural cough drops, with their sweet flavor and firm texture that softens to a gummy-like candy consistency, taste as good as they are effective at soothing sore throats. Available in Honey or original Cherry flavor. 26 throat drops per 1.7 oz. container. Set of 3; each container has 26 throat drops.
- Still made in America using the original family recipe
- Original Cherry or soothing Honey flavors
- All-natural cough drops
- Set of 3; each container has 26 throat drops
- Mix-and-match flavors
When it comes to all-natural remedies for sore throats, none taste better or trigger more memories than these Pine Bros. throat lozenges.
Pine Bros. Throat Drops Set of 3 Containers
Sore Throat Warning: If sore throat is severe, persists for more than 2 days, is accompanied by fever, nausea, swelling, rash, headache, vomiting, consult a doctor promptly.
Active Ings: Glycerin 62mg. Inactive Ings: Gum Arabic, Sugar
Honey, Corn Syrup, Water, Natural Flavor, Coconut Oil,
Canauba Wax.
Gylcerin, Gum Acacia, Sugar, Corn Syrup, Water, Citric Acid,
Natural Flavor, Sunflower Oil, Colored with Elderberry
Concentrate, Carnauba Wax.
For temporary relief of minor discomfort and protection of irritated areas in sore mouth and sore throat. Directions: Adults and children 3 years and over: dissolve 1 or 2 drops slowly in mouth. Repeat as needed. Best if not chewed. For children under 3, ask a doctor.
Manufactured In: USA
Material - Country Of Origin: USA


text:
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Cowboys Legend Everson Walls Agrees to Answer Your Questions
Discussion in 'CZ Announcement Zone' started by Hostile, Feb 18, 2008.
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text:
Ds is 10 months old and our goal is to continue bf'ing for at least a year. I am not wedded to extended bf'ing, but certainly not opposed. We'll just see where it takes us. I have really enjoyed breastfeeding, but I am SICK of pumping. I think I would be happiest to get to a point where he nurses only first thing in the morning and right before he goes to bed.
My question at this point is how much milk should I be sending to the sitter each day? Right now I pump between 10-12 ounces for the next day (2 pump sessions) and he usually finishes around 10 ounces over the course of the day. The kid LOVES food and gets the biggest portion of his daily solid foods during the day at the sitter. As he approaches a year, when can I drop a pump session and start sending less milk to the sitter? Any advice from those that have been there?


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LA CROSSE, Wis. -- Lieutenant Governor Rebecca Kleefisch made a campaign stop in La Crosse Monday.
Kleefisch is in a recall battle against democrat Mahlon Mitchell, the President of the Professional Fire Fighters of Wisconsin.
Kleefisch was asked whether her campaign would be hurt by Governor Scott Walker's "divide and conquer" comments that surfaced last week regarding collective bargaining.
"I think the things that impact the campaign are making sure that the facts get out, the savings of $1 billion between state and local government, and the surplus that we're going to end up with at the end of this biennial budget year," she says.
Mitchell has opposed the collective bargaining law since it was introduced, even though police and firefighter unions were originally exempt from the collective bargaining law.


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Comments: I love these shoes! Very lightweight and comfy. These are by far the most comfortable shoes I own. True to size. I am wearing them right now while writing this review. The only thing I don't like about these shoes would be small rocks can get stuck on the bottom of the shoe, easy to remove though. You can't go wrong with this pair!
From: Soleil, Redwood, City, CA, USA
Comments: I love the fit and flexibility of this shoe. I wear them for sprints or running distances up to 6 miles. Only drawback is that they aren't vented very well. They are hot and do cause blisters because of the heat inside the shoe. I will not use them running in the summer, they will have to be a gym shoe until the weather cools.
From: Dawn, Fergus Falls, MN USA


text:
Please use this identifier to cite or link to this item: http://hdl.handle.net/1959.3/225690
- Title
- The black grapevine: Aboriginal activism and the stolen generations
- Author(s)
- Briskman, Linda
- Abstract
- The Black Grapevine tells the extraordinary story of Indigenous efforts to stop children becoming part of the 'stolen generations' and to end the government policies and practices which destroyed their families. Linda Briskman uses the story of the Secretariat of National Aboriginal and Island Child Care (SNAICC) to centre her book. Indigenous people involved tell how they came together to form a national organisation for child care, how they found similar experiences from one end of Australia to the other, how they pooled experience and emotion to provide support for one another, how they lobbied for a national inquiry. And they campaigned. Indigenous activists fought with astonishing resilience for recognition of past and present practices, for the right to have Indigenous viewpoints to the forefront, and for resources. Briskman's story goes beyond the contest with the state to give a convincing portrait of the ways in which Indigenous groups worked. There are connections with international action, educational and fund-raising projects, and the much-vaunted annual Aboriginal and Islander Children's Day. She concludes by reflecting on the successes of campaigns and actions to date, and the extent of 'unfinished business'. Her strong academic background combines with the oral testimony of the activists to produce a fast-moving book that is both entertaining and rigorous.
- Publication type
- Book
- Publication year
- 2003
- Keyword(s)
- Aboriginal people; Activism; Australia; Campaigns; Indigenous peoples; Secretariat of National Aboriginal and Island Child Care; SNAICC; Stolen generations
- Publisher
- The Federation Press
- 9781862874497, 1862874492
- Publisher URL
- Copyright
- Copyright © The Federation Press.
- Peer reviewed


text:
House OKs ban on cellphones while driving
MONTPELIER The Vermont House gave final approval Friday to a bill that bans the handheld use of cellphones and other electronic devices while driving.
The legislation, H.62, was passed on a voice vote after lawmakers approved two amendments on the floor. Final passage came one day after the chamber advanced the bill on a voice vote, following a bit of lively debate and a plea for passage by Rep. Mark Huntley, D-Cavendish, who said his son died in a crash because he was searching for music on his smartphone.
Under the bill, using a phone or other device while behind the wheel would be allowed only with a hands-free feature. Twelve states already have such laws.
A first offense would carry a fine of $100 to $200. All subsequent offenses within a two-year period would carry a fine of $250 to $500, the bill states.
Also, a first offense would put two points on a drivers record, while subsequent offenses would result in five points. At 10 points a drivers license is suspended.
Rep. Teo Zagar, D-Barnard, introduced an amendment allowing the use of hands to activate hands-free mode, as long as the phone or device is in a cradle or otherwise secured. Without the amendment, the bill would have required hands-free mode to be activated by voice only. Many people dont own voice-activated phones.
In many ways this is safer and requires less attention than changing a CD, Zagar said.
The House Judiciary Committee found it to be a friendly amendment and it passed the full House on a voice vote.
Rep. Warren Van Wyck, a Ferrisburgh Democrat, introduced an amendment carving out a special exemption for farm workers. The measure was intended primarily for Addison and Franklin counties, he said, where there is still a lot of farming.
The exemption will allow those operating registered or unregistered farm trucks to use their phones to communicate with each other. Van Wyck said farmers once used citizen-band radios to dispatch vehicles but now typically use phones.
Rep. Thomas Koch, of Barre, who reported the bill for the Judiciary Committee, said the panel found it to be a friendly amendment because it is narrowly construed and benefits a segment of the economy we value. It was also approved by the full body on a voice vote.
A third amendment from Rep. Robert Bouchard, a Colchester Republican, was withdrawn after committee members opposed it. It would have eliminated the five-point penalty for a second or subsequent offense.
I think the point system is too severe for handheld, he said.
But most committee members said they wanted to maintain the same penalties already assigned to texting while driving.
The measure now moves to the Senate, where it appears to have enough support to pass.
However, Gov. Peter Shumlin again reiterated his opposition, saying it is difficult to legislate common sense. The governor stopped short of saying he would veto the bill, though.
email@example.com IN Vermont NewsMONTPELIER Rep. Peter Welch, D-Vt. Full StoryVermont Attorney General Bill Sorrell plans to join the U.S. Full StoryAs Rutland prepares to welcome Syrian refugees to its community, some are continuing to voice... Full Story
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Eastern Washington kicked off spring football this week in Cheney looking to build on a 2012 run to the FCS semi-finals.
The Eagles practiced without pads on Thursday and Friday, covering a lot of fundamentals. They'll put on the pads for the first time on Tuesday.
The Red/White spring game is scheduled for April 27th.


text:
©1967 S.E. Hinton; (P)1988 Random House, Inc. Listening Library, an imprint of the Random House Audio Publishing Group
"Great for a wide variety of ages"
My fourteen year old son kept urging me to get this book after reading it in school. I initially got it simply to support and encourage his reading habit. The book grabbed me from the beginning and never bogged down. I recommend it to ALL teenagers and see no reason why any adult wouldn't like it as well. Great story, well narrated.
"The Outsiders"
I remember reading this book in school, many years ago - so when my son brought it home to read as english 8 homework, I decidied to download it one evening so that we could discuss it together after he finished reading it. It's a great story for many reasons - the class differences and similarities are very well detailed. The main character is very captivating in the book and is easy to lissen to as an audible book. It's hard to stop listening - luckily it's not a long book.
"Great "classic" story"
What a great story. Stories should be told and passed down through generations. This is one of those that every human in any country in any language can relate to. Hinton tells this story very well. It's about growing up and dealing with some of the problems we all had.
This book should be on the "must read" list for every young person in our country.
Tech addict
"Chapters DO NOT match."
Great audio book. However, I had the same problem as the previous reviewer. The chapters DO NOT MATCH. Chapter 4 begins half way through chapter three etc...Not good if you use in classroom where you have to select a specific chapter.
"Jim Fyfe's Amazing Voices"
I'm an 8th grade Language Arts teacher and I usually read the narration for books or stories to my classes. I feel I can do a better job than the taped narrations I have access to. In this case, I heard a sample of Mr. Fyfe's narration for 'The Outsiders' and I was sold. He has an amazing capacity to capture numerous different voices and I'm hoping to find another book that he has narrated and that I can use for my 8th graders.-Andrew Kornfeld
Duncan Middle School, Palm Beach gardens, Florida
I am a miracle worker. Doing what I can to choose love over fear.
"The perfect first listen"
The story is short which in my opinion blends every moment together. A perfect listen.
Johnny and Soda: Because of their kindness.
A painful beauty
Not heard about this? Turn it on. Please.
Addicted to Audible since 2009
"A Classic!"
A great movie and a great audio book as well. Loved the story and I especially loved the narrator as well. Two thumbs up and highly recommended to all who is or once was a teenager!
"The Outsiders"
This audio book does not follow the print book! I bought this to play for my 7th grade literature class, but the chapters listed on my ipod did not match what the narrator was reading! I would select chapter 7, and when the narrator read it said "Chapter 9" !
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Everyone could use better credit. Here are some easy ways to better your credit score.
Experts say applying for a lot of new credit at once can hurt your score, especially if you're gearing up for a big purchase like a house or car. It's a red flag for lenders.


text:
Please use this identifier to cite or link to this item: http://hdl.handle.net/1959.3/235648
- Title
- Effect of refractive index mismatch aberration in arsenic trisulfide
- Author(s)
- Cumming, Benjamin P.; Debbarma, Sukanta; Luther-Davies, Barry; Gu, Min
- Abstract
- We demonstrate compensation for the spherical aberration due to the refractive index mismatch that occurs when a laser beam is focused into a thick arsenic trisulfide (As2S3) film with a high numerical aperture objective. The effects of the aberration at different focal depths on the point spread function have been calculated numerically and the axial response method shown to be a useful measure for compensating the spherical aberration. We show that with the addition of adaptive optics based on a spatial light modulator, the aberration can be significantly reduced, resulting in an increase in peak intensity by a factor of 2.4 and a decrease in axial elongation by a factor of 2.2.
- Publication type
- Journal article
- Research centre
- Swinburne University of Technology. Faculty of Engineering and Industrial Sciences. Centre for Micro-Photonics
- Source
- Applied Physics B: Lasers and Optics, Vol. 109, no. 2 (Nov 2012), pp. 227-232
- Publication year
- 2012
- FOR Code(s)
- 0205 Optical Physics; 0906 Electrical and Electronic Engineering; 0913 Mechanical Engineering
- Keyword(s)
- Arsenic trisulfide; Axial response; Refractive index; Refractive index mismatch; Spherical aberration; Thick films
- Publisher
- Springer
- 0946-2171
- Publisher URL
- Copyright
- Copyright © Springer-Verlag 2012.
- Peer reviewed