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Designing our Interfaith Ketubah
When Jarrett and I started our wedding planning journey last April, I knew very little about Jewish wedding traditions. However, once I learned how important it was to Jarrett for us to have a Jewish wedding ceremony, I spent time learning about Jewish wedding traditions so we could find special ways to incorporate these traditions into our big day.
One tradition Jarrett and I have been particularly focused on over the last few weeks is the design of our interfaith Ketubah. The Ketubah is a Jewish marriage contract. In ancient times, this marriage contract was legally binding and confirmed that the groom would provide for his new spouse. Today, the Ketubah is a personalized piece of art that includes both meaningful text and design. The modern Ketubah has been adapted from ancient times to better illustrate modern marriage, the partnership between a couple and their love and commitment to each other.
During our first meeting with our wedding officiant, Rabbi Robyn Frisch (Director of IFF/Philadelphia), we discussed ceremony details, including the Ketubah. She advised that we choose a Ketubah that is meaningful to us, especially when deciding on the text. She informed us that there are different texts written for couples of different religious backgrounds so we should search for interfaith text for our Ketubah (for ideas see this InterfaithFamily resource). She also asked us to start thinking about who we would choose as our witnesses in signing our Ketubah on our wedding day. The two witnesses must not be related to us but should be very special people in our lives to share in such an important tradition.
Rabbi Robyn made suggestions on where to search for our perfect Ketubah, including the National Museum of Jewish American History in Philadelphia as well as Etsy online. Then, at our last InterfaithFamily Love & Religion workshop a fellow classmate who is also in the process of planning her interfaith wedding made the suggestion to look on www.ketubah.com.
I spent days scouring through the pages of beautifully-designed Ketubahs and shared many of my favorite designs with Jarrett. It's a big decision as we look forward to having this special work of art displayed during our wedding ceremony in October and then hanging it inside our home for years to come. We loved so many of the options on the ketubah.com website. It was a hard decision but we were drawn toward the intricacy of the paper cut ketubah designs. Our favorite design has personalized touches within the artwork, including our names cut into the top. We can also choose to incorporate a favorite quote or phrase around the perimeter of the Ketubah design.
This site offered four interfaith text options for us to choose from. I printed one of each text choice from their website and on a recent road trip Jarrett and I spent time reading the texts together to determine which one was most meaningful to us. We chose an interfaith text that we could identify with and felt symbolized our partnership with words we would use toward one another. We felt especially connected to the text that states, "They choose each other as friends according to the teachings of our ancestors who said, 'Acquire a friend with whom you will learn, next to whom you will sleep and in whom you will confide.'"
To make this wedding planning step even more special, Jarrett's mom has requested to buy our Ketubah as part of our wedding gift because it is equally important to her that we have chosen to incorporate Jewish wedding traditions into our big day. We look forward to seeing our personalized Ketubah when it arrives and we are even more excited to participate in the Ketubah-signing ceremony on our wedding day in less than five months!
Top 3 Wedding Planning Tips from a Beginner
I have planned exactly one party in my lifetime. It was a surprise sweet sixteen birthday party for my best friend during our sophomore year of high school. The party was held in my parents' basement decorated with balloons and streamers. Party guests successfully pulled off the surprise and spent the rest of the evening gobbling slices of pizza and birthday cake while mingling and listening to the latest tunes playing on my boom box.
Fast forward 12 years to 2016. I am knee deep in planning the biggest party of my life…my wedding! Jarrett and I are approaching our one year engagement anniversary (March 20th) and have been busy wedding planning for nearly 11 months now. We continue checking items off of our to-do list as we move closer to our October 2016 wedding. While our to-do list is much shorter than it was 11 months ago, it's safe to say I probably looked like a happy deer in headlights last April. I was so excited about our recent engagement but had NO idea where to begin when it came to wedding planning. So I thought it might be helpful to share some planning tips that worked for us. We are by no means professionals when it comes to wedding planning but we're having a lot of fun figuring it out!
1. Talk Details! Jarrett and I sat down one day and discussed everything we knew about weddings (mostly from the weddings we had recently attended). We brainstormed what we wanted and did not want in our day. We talked seasons: Summer? Too hot. Winter? Too cold. Spring? A spring 2016 wedding would only allow one year of planning which felt too rushed. We also discussed that weddings are very expensive and the additional months of planning would allow us to save more money. We had made our decision. A Fall 2016 wedding would allow a year and a half for all of the planning, decision making and money saving (it also happened to be my favorite season!). We drafted a guest list based on who we knew we would be inviting plus estimated a number for our parents' guest lists. Our guest estimate totaled 150-200 individuals so we knew we needed a venue that accommodated at least 200.
Finally, while the wedding day is about celebrating us as a couple, we knew the majority of our guests would be traveling to celebrate with us and we did not want our wedding day to be an inconvenience for our friends and family. We knew we wanted a Saturday evening wedding with the ceremony and reception at the same location. So we had determined season, guest count and venue wish list. Then we discussed budget. We listed each wedding vendor we would need for our wedding day (Venue, Caterer, Photographer, DJ, Florist and Officiant). We created a budget range for each potential vendor prior to setting up any appointments. From there, we estimated a total budget range for all wedding vendors plus additional details (wedding dress, invitations, etc). It seemed we had it all planned on scratch paper! Now what?!
2. Get Organized! After our engagement, friends and family members had bought me a number of wedding magazines and I was so excited to start browsing through for inspiration. Over time, I started cutting ideas I liked out of the magazines so I could keep them in a pile and easily access them. I realized I needed somewhere to hold all of our wedding planning resources. I bought a three-ring binder and visited one of my favorite websites, Pinterest, and searched for "Wedding Organization Printables." I found free print-out dividers and resources for "financials," "guest list & seating" and "timeline/to-dos." I knew that everything would be in one place and nothing would get lost. Through each step, I write in the amount we spent and checked it off the to-do list! As we decided on each vendor, I placed signed copies of our contracts in the binder so I could refer back to them when I needed a quick reference or to see when a future payment was due.
3. Do Your Homework/Be Willing to Be Flexible! I began searching for wedding vendors in the Philadelphia/South Jersey area. I utilized "The Knot" website/app on my phone to search vendors by location. The app made it easy to learn details about different vendors and read reviews from people who had utilized their services. I could even look at samples of vendors' work (ie: photography/floral arrangements) on "The Knot" app.
First, we chose wedding venues to tour based on those that met our search criteria. We knew we would need a confirmed wedding date and venue selection before being able to book any additional vendors. I made the vendor appointments and Jarrett came along to every meeting to provide his opinion and support. It is helpful to make the decisions together since after all, it is our wedding day! We made a list of questions to ask before each meeting so we would be prepared. The reason I suggest being flexible is because many wedding venues, especially popular ones book up far in advance. We toured a wedding venue in April 2015 and fell in love with it. We knew we wanted to host our wedding there but it was booked through September 2016 for Saturday weddings. This is how we decided on an October wedding date (based on venue availability). If you have your heart set on a specific wedding date, you may need to be flexible with your venue choice. The more time you allow for planning, the more choices you will have!
Other selling points for our venue included the staff; they thoroughly and professionally answered all of our questions and put our worries at ease. We learned that we could have both our ceremony and reception on-site and they even had on-site catering and bar service so we were able to save a few steps. Once we selected our venue, we continued booking our remaining wedding vendors one by one. We carefully read the vendor reviews, made lists of questions and compared prices and availability for our chosen wedding date.
My final planning tip would be to have fun! Many people have told me wedding planning is so stressful and they were happy when it was over. Truthfully, because we gave ourselves a lot of planning time, I have been enjoying this life chapter and may miss it when it all comes to an end because it's truly a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity. We are still seven months away from the big day and there is still so much to do but I am content in what we have been able to accomplish thus far; especially since we're figuring it out on our own and with the support of one another! Next up on the to-do list: designing invitations and yarmulkas! Stay tuned for more wedding fun.
A Jewish Wedding for a Catholic Girl
I was raised Catholic. I have received sacraments in the Catholic Church including Baptism, Penance, Holy Communion and Confirmation. While spirituality has always been an important part of my life, it has been a part of me that I have kept more reserved. As I grew through adolescence and into adulthood, the thought of marrying someone of a different religious background never crossed my mind. But after meeting Jarrett and growing closer, our different faiths became a norm in our relationship. We continue to teach each other about our different religious backgrounds and continue to respect each other for these differences… and that is how our relationship works.
Jarrett has been my wedding date to 10 weddings in the last two years. We have watched some of our closest friends and family members marry their significant others in Catholic, Jewish, Christian and non-denominational ceremonies. As each wedding came and went, I found myself thinking about what kind of wedding ceremony I might someday have. It wasn't until Jarrett and I got engaged in March of 2015 that I realized my thoughts would soon become actions as we prepared to plan our interfaith wedding.
When Jarrett and I sat down to begin wedding planning, he expressed to me how important it was to him to be married by a rabbi in a Jewish wedding ceremony. At this point in time, I had been to two Jewish weddings but felt they were truly unique and memorable. I liked that the Jewish ceremonies were personal and intimate with a strong focus on the bride and groom. While I have always felt that Catholic wedding ceremonies are beautiful and meaningful, I had never dreamed of getting married in a Catholic church and this was not a requirement I needed in order to marry my best friend. What mattered to me was what Jarrett felt to be important for our big day. It was special to hear him explain that his Jewish heritage was very important to him and that having a Jewish wedding was something he had always wanted. So it was settled. We would be married by a rabbi in an interfaith wedding ceremony with an emphasis on Jewish traditions. The only problems were, I did not know a lot about Jewish wedding traditions and had no idea where we would find an interfaith rabbi to marry us!
As fate would have it, while working in Philadelphia one day, I had a meeting with a pharmaceutical representative. At the end of the meeting, I asked her if she had plans for the upcoming holiday weekend (Easter). When she responded that she was Jewish and celebrates Passover, I found myself feeling somewhat embarrassed that I hadn't considered this before asking the question. I apologized then explained that my fiancé is also Jewish and that I celebrate Passover with him and his family. She asked about wedding planning and I explained that we had plans to look for a rabbi to marry us. She excitedly responded that she has a very close friend who just so happens to be a rabbi and the director of InterfaithFamily/Philadelphia. She gave me her friend's contact information and I reached out to introduce myself. Jarrett and I met with Rabbi Robyn Frisch and knew our search for the right wedding officiant was over before it had really even begun. Rabbi Frisch was kind, easy-going and non-judgmental. We look forward to working with her over the next several months and having her as an essential part of our big day!
During our second meeting with Rabbi Frisch, she provided us with some information to guide our decision-making through the ceremony-planning process. I was relieved to have someone to teach us more about Jewish wedding traditions so I could expand my knowledge and understanding throughout the planning process. Over the next several months, Jarrett and I will be busy making important decisions including designing our chuppah, choosing a ketubah and determining which Jewish wedding traditions to incorporate into our ceremony. As we continue to move closer to our wedding date, we are also looking forward to the opportunity to participate in InterfaithFamily's "Love and Religion" Workshop which will give Jarrett and I the opportunity to dive deeper into some challenging scenarios that may arise in our future as an interfaith couple. I feel this will help strengthen our bond and allow us to learn even more about each other as we approach marriage. I look forward to sharing our wedding planning experiences as we move closer to saying "I do" in eight short months!
The Honeymoon is Over … and That's Not a Bad Thing
The wedding was over a month ago, and we had a fantastic honeymoon in the Galapagos Islands and mainland Ecuador. It was an incredible mix of beautiful scenery, wildlife, laid back people and delicious food. It was insanely hard leaving behind 80-degree tropical weather with limitless ocean and volcano views to return to 10-degree gray and dreary weather in Philadelphia. But we did, and we are back with stories to tell.
I have been sick twice in the last two weeks since I got back (it's been a bad winter) and I am working on making a complete career shift that is both scary and exciting. Back to reality. As it happens, the phrase "the honeymoon is over" feels pretty apropos, but luckily not regarding our relationship.
Over the last two weeks I have returned to my gratefulness practice where I can truly appreciate the unbelievable experiences we had and the opportunities we were given with the wedding.
There was something intangibly special about our wedding. Having everyone we loved in one place cheering us on and celebrating this milestone was a high I will carry with me forever. The photos we have and the trailer video from our videographer are mind blowing and awesome. They capture our love and admiration for each other, which is something I will cherish for many years to come.
I look forward to watching my wedding video trailer (and the longer one still in progress) when we are at our highest and lowest moments, to remember how we felt on our wedding day. If you are planning a wedding and can splurge for a videographer in your wedding budget, do it. It is something you will have forever, long after the funny stories and fuzzy memories fade. It is something we would not have done because of cost, so having this included in the contest we won was such a blessing. But if I had to do it again, it is something I would spring for.
Our ceremony was exactly what we hoped it would be—intimate and meaningful—and it honored both of our religious backgrounds. Jose's side loved seeing the Jewish traditions; his older relatives gave us feedback that they were glad they could witness them for the first time. My side adored the Filipino traditions, especially the arras, or exchanging of coins, and the cord and veil ritual, where Jose and I were clothed in a veil and a cord shaped in an infinity sign while we exchanged short promises.
We chose seven friends and relatives to recite seven blessings to us in English, as a nod to the Jewish tradition of a rabbi reciting the Sheva Brachot, or seven blessings, in Hebrew. We rewrote them to words that made sense for us and it was beautiful to have our loved ones say those words back to us.
We also did a candle lighting ceremony where our parents lit two candles and we used their flames to light our unity candle, as a nod to the Filipino tradition of the parents "lighting the way" for the new couple. We also incorporated the Jewish tradition of saying a blessing and drinking wine, and Jose broke the glass at the end of the ceremony, followed by a huge "Mazel tov!" from the crowd.
The night before the wedding really set the tone for the weekend. We hosted a ketubah signing ceremony for our immediate families and the wedding party. This was something I thought long and hard about for months during wedding planning. Winning the contest was amazing in so many ways, but it was important to me to still have the intimate ceremony I always dreamed of. At the ketubah signing, we had our rabbi from our synagogue officiate by explaining what the document is and the meaning of it, and then leading us through signing it. We also lit Hanukkah candles for the sixth night of Hanukkah and Shabbat candles, since it was a Friday night.
We were able to accomplish a personal and meaningful feeling at our ceremony, thanks to our outstanding officiant who donated her services for the contest, Jill Magerman. I can't recommend her highly enough. I feel like she is a part of our little family now.
But not everything went so easily. Two days before our wedding, Jose's first cousin lost her courageous battle with cancer. It was devastating; she had her entire life before her and young children and a wonderful husband we all adore. We did our best to honor her life at our ceremony and to fill the hole left by her absence with happy memories from the evening. We were not able to be with Jose's family at her funeral, but we said prayers for her while we were on our honeymoon.
After the ceremony, Jose and I took a few moments alone for the Jewish tradition of yichud, or seclusion. It is a chance for us, as a newly married couple, to spend a few cherished moments alone before being showered with love by our family and friends at the reception. It was such a nice break in the day, and gave us a chance to take our first married selfie with our new rings.
The reception was the most fun I have ever had. We hired DJ Deejay, a nightlife and wedding deejay we go to see often, and he played non stop hits. (His slogan when he spins at Silk City Diner is "playing anything you can shake your hips to.") I danced myself to exhaustion! It was glorious. I remember my face hurt so much from smiling and my voice was sore from singing.
We honored a bunch of traditions at the reception too: the hora (for the Jews), the money dance (for the Filipinos) and the anniversary dance. We did the cake cutting and I smashed cake in Jose's face (sorry babe). But we did not do a bouquet or garter toss (sorry wedding party), although I did have some awesome friends recreate a bouquet toss of their own, which was hilarious.
The speeches by my parents, Jose's mom and Uncle Jun, my sister (Maid of Honor) and Jose's brother (Best Man) left me floored. I was seriously blown away by the power of their words and genuine joy that our families felt for us. And the craziest part was that my sister and Jose's brother chose the exact same Dr. Seuss quote in their speeches, without planning it:
"We're all a little weird. And life is a little weird. And when we find someone whose weirdness is compatible with ours, we join up with them and fall into mutually satisfying weirdness — and call it love — true love."
Hold on, are we really that weird?
Ultimately nothing was better than Jose's poetic vows. I knew he was sentimental and a great orator, but I had no idea he could tug at my heartstrings that hard. Jeez, he had me sobbing! And then smiling. And then laughing. His best line came off the cuff. He planned what he was going to say but then winged it to make it even better. He said, "Before I met you, I was singin', I was dancin', I was fine." [Roar of laughter from the audience.] "Now you're the music I dance to and the song that I sing." [More sobbing from me!]
Our first dance was to Jason Mraz's "I Won't Give Up" which has a very special meaning to us. When we found ourselves playing it daily we knew it had to become our first dance song. Our favorite line is: "I won't give up on us / Even if the skies get rough / I'm giving you all my love / I'm still looking up." I can still hear the first few guitar chords playing in my head and it makes me tear up.
My father/daughter dance was also a highlight for me. We chose another Jason Mraz song, "93 Million Miles," that holds a lot of meaning for me and my dad. Substitute the word "daughter" for "son" and the lyrics are basically a transcript of words he has said to me in the not so distant past. My parents have helped me out of difficult times, and to them I am so grateful. The song goes: "Oh, my my, how beautiful / oh my irrefutable father / He told me, 'Son, sometimes it may seem dark, but the absence of the light is a necessary part.'" And for my mother who believes in me as I embark on a new career path: "Oh, my my, how beautiful / oh my beautiful mother / She told me, 'Son, in life you're gonna go far / If you do it right you'll love where you are.'"
I think about the lessons my parents have taught me and those lyrics daily. They so beautifully capture the bond we have and the love and respect I have for how well they have raised me and my sister. I will have a lot to live up to when I become a parent!
I am not sure whether our guests noticed but Jose produced the wedding like a show, with acoustic versions of our first dance and other songs teased in at the ceremony and then played in full at the reception. He might have a second career in theater production.
As I settle back into real life, I find myself feeling my name change to my married surname to be very cool and very jarring. I am so happy to take Jose's last name. Really giddy actually to be that solidly connected to him, but a name is such a huge part of anyone's identity. And in my yoga teaching and writing I am Emily Golomb. It's so weird to see my new name, Emily Sabalbaro, on Facebook and in print, and it will certainly take some getting used to. But my favorite part is that it marks the official start of a new chapter. As of December 12, 2015, I am beloved, and my beloved is mine.
How to Include Everyone in Our Jewish-Mexican Wedding
By Hila Ratzabi
When José and I first started dating, my Jewish parents were not pleased. Though my mom is fairly liberal, some instinct flared up in her that has roots in centuries of Jewish fear of disappearance. Though that fear has lessened over the decades for many Jewish families, particularly in the U.S., it still rises up for many people, sometimes unexpectedly. What if my daughter loses her Jewish identity?, some parents wonder. What if the grandchildren aren't raised Jewish? Is this the end of the line?
For me and many other Jews like me, this fear is unfounded. I went to Jewish day school from kindergarten through high school, and even went on to get a degree in Jewish philosophy. While my Jewish practices have changed over the years, I have always been a proud and engaged Jewish woman. I was, and remain, confident that my connection to Judaism is strong enough to share with my husband who is not Jewish and our future children.
The road to acceptance took a few years, but by the time we were ready to get engaged my parents had thankfully come around. They gave us their blessing, and we set out to create a wedding that reflected my Jewish heritage and José's Mexican culture.
We had it fairly easy in that José does not identify with a particular religious tradition. He is a scientist and committed atheist; as a child he briefly attended a Baptist religious school in the small town in Baja where he was raised, but he definitively broke off with religion when he awakened to his atheism. While being an atheist, José has always supported and joined in with my Jewish practices. I'm not a believer either, but I love Jewish holidays, attending services and grappling with the big questions in life. Judaism is the lens through which I consider ethical dilemmas and the source of my commitment to social and environmental justice. These are things we're able to share.
We found an amazing Reconstructionist rabbi, Rachel Weiss, of Congregation Beit
Together with Rabbi Weiss, we designed a ceremony that honored the dual heritage we were bringing together. We included traditional Jewish elements, including the chuppah (wedding canopy), the seven blessings, the circling of bride and groom, the ketubah (marriage contract) and the ring exchange. We wrote our own ketubah text instead of using the traditional text, and changed the language of the ring exchange and seven blessings to be more inclusive and universal. The witnesses who signed our ketubah included two of our close friends who happen to be another interfaith/intercultural couple—Jewish and Indian. We had watched them create a beautiful marriage that included both of their cultures, and were inspired by their example.
José's grandmother was central to his upbringing, often standing in as a second parent since he didn't have a father in his life, so we wanted to make sure she was included and would understand what was going on at the wedding. Since his grandmother doesn't speak English, Rabbi Weiss explained each part of the ceremony before it was performed in both English and Spanish. José's grandmother found the customs fascinating and listened intently as they were described. We also had traditional Mexican paper cutouts (papel picado) created for our wedding, which served as decoration at the entrance of the garden where the ceremony took place.
My own Jewish background is somewhat mixed, in that my mother is Ashkenazi and my father is Yemenite on his father's side and Sephardic on his mother's side. To honor my late grandmother, Rabbi Weiss sang a Jewish song in Ladino, the Judeo-Spanish language that my grandmother had spoken. This was another way to bridge our cultures, having a taste of the Spanish language woven into an ancient Jewish song.
When it came to the reception, we just wanted to throw an awesome party. The raucous klezmer band Golem was essential to making that happen. The wedding took place in an art museum on Long Island, and since both José and I dabble in visual art, we made mini-paintings on mini-easels as souvenirs for our (very impressed) guests. We also brought a giant blank canvas and paints for guests to create a piece of collective artwork for us. The painting now hangs in our living room, reminding us of that incredible day.
During the reception, my mom gave a speech that chronicled her and my dad's evolution in coming to accept and share the joy in our relationship. They had truly done a "180," realizing over time that they had nothing to fear in my marrying "outside" the Jewish faith, and that I had found the life partner who was exactly right for me, and who they loved like a son. Now, three years later, I am pregnant, and we all can't wait to bring another person into our crazy, mixed family. Among our plans for the baby: teaching it Hebrew, Spanish… and if there's time, maybe even English.
A Rabbi, a Puppy, a Catholic and a Jew Walk into a Bar
A rabbi, a puppy, a Catholic and a Jew walk into a bar… Sounds like the setup for a bad joke, right? Much the opposite. It was a brainstorming session for incorporating religious traditions and the things we love into our wedding ceremony.
Jose and I joined a reform synagogue last year—Rodeph Shalom on Broad Street. We joined not because I felt particularly religious at the time, and not because Jose is planning on converting, but because we felt a strong sense of community there. Jose accompanied me to a High Holiday service there a few years back and we noticed same-sex couples, multiracial couples and folks of all ages. It was eye-opening to me. Growing up in Baltimore, I had not seen that kind of diversity inside a synagogue. Jose and I instantly felt a welcoming and inclusive vibe and figured this synagogue must be doing something right. Jose even remarked that this was not the exclusive, "chosen" mentality he's previously encountered with Judaism. I agreed.
We took a class with a young rabbi by the name of Eli, and it proved extremely beneficial for us in understanding each other's spirituality. The class was called "Judaism 101," but it was not designed to preach Judaism's teachings. It was a discussion about the basic tenets of Judaism and whether we identify with those principles and ideas of god (little "g" and big "G"). With our classmates old and young, Jewish and not, religious and not, and of various racial and ethnic backgrounds, we discussed how each of our upbringings have influenced our thinking. Jose got to dip his toes further into the world of Judaism and I got a refresher course and some new information.
Rabbi Eli invited the class to his beautiful apartment in the city for Shabbat dinner and we loved the experience. We've since gone to a few other Shabbat/Hanukkah dinners through the synagogue and through InterfaithFamily, and we have kept in touch with events happening at the synagogue. Through the wedding contest that we recently won, the officiant was chosen for us. She is amazing (see my previous blog post!), but I wanted to incorporate a personal touch for the Jewish aspect of the wedding. The ketubah signing (Jewish marriage license) traditionally happens right before the ceremony and it is very important to me, so we reached out to Rabbi Eli to see if he would be interested in officiating it.
Rabbi Eli suggested we meet at a bar (how cool is that?) and we brought along our 7-month-old puppy and sat outside at one of the best bars in the city. If you had asked me at age 13 whether I'd be having drinks with a rabbi at a bar I would have slapped you and called you crazy. If you had even asked me whether I'd belong to a synagogue and have a rabbi that I called on, I might call you crazy for that. Needless to say, there we were.
We spoke with Rabbi Eli about the most meaningful thing to us in the wedding—the ceremony. Although we were there to discuss the ketubah signing, he became an amazing sounding board for all of our questions about the ceremony. We discussed what religious traditions we could incorporate and how the choices would be significant to our families and friends. We talked about how to involve our families in the ceremony. We disclosed that while we enjoy sharing our love publicly (if you are friends with us on Facebook you know), I am private about things that are important to me and I want the ceremony to feel intimate. Most of all, we expressed how we are using our engagement as a time for reflection about our relationship. We are honest about what we each want from our marriage and we recognize that this is the time in our lives to speak openly about it. (Sidenote: It's a lot less scary to ask your partner direct questions than to wonder what they think, and it's a lot easier to do it now than in 10 or 20 years.) Plus, we want to build a solid foundation for the rest of our lives together and we want to be prepared for any challenges that may arise.
One of the biggest challenges in planning a wedding is to avoid getting wrapped up in the minutiae. I am eternally grateful to have won a wedding contest, because it has, for the most part, allowed us to remain relatively free of financial woes and family drama that is usually inherent in planning a wedding. Surely, the time will come when those challenges appear, but for now we are able to keep our focus on the marriage, not on the wedding, and we can focus on the foundation we're building together.
After our meeting at the bar, Rabbi Eli shipped us a book he recommended we read, called Meeting at the Well: A Jewish Spiritual Guide to Being Engaged. I'm about halfway through it, and it's great. The focus of the book is on using the engagement period, however long it may be, to work through how you both feel about certain issues, religious and otherwise. While some of it can be cheesy, it does have exercises and discussion points on topics ranging from raising kids to intimacy to finances to how you spend your free time. It's a great resource for us to discuss things we never thought would be important. I learned some new things about Jose in the process, which truly surprised me after six years of dating and five years of living together.
Over the next few months, I'm looking forward to the fun stuff: bachelor and bachelorette parties, the tastings, the engagement photo shoot, working with the DJ on what songs to include and planning our honeymoon (no that's not included!). Stay tuned for more updates on our wedding planning!
Why I #ChooseLove: In Sickness & In Health
I've been absent from the IFF blog for the past month or so, dealing with some health issues that kept me a bit too busy for wedding planning—or reflecting.
While I've dealt with doctor's appointments and missed deadlines at work, I've had a mental image of a calendar with pages flying by—each representing a day of wedding planning that we've missed. But, honestly, none of that really matters. What matters is the fact that, with the support of family and friends, we'll make it there together—the details of what the wedding day will look like are substantially less important. After all, that's what it means when you choose love.
At a recent doctor's appointment a nurse smiled at Justin, as she said to me, "you've got a good one sticking by you through this." Justin's response was instantaneous: "well, she's sure had her share of being by my side in similar situations."
It's true. Only four months after we met I was by Justin's side, calling 911 when he was injured, holding his hand as he came to after a 7 hour surgery, and traveling almost every other week between Boston and Philadelphia as he spent three months in a rehabilitation hospital relearning how to walk.
We've been testing the traditional marriage vow of "in sickness and in health" through the course of our relationship.
We haven't actually made it to the point of planning where we are addressing vows (which, as we've learned, are traditional in Christian ceremonies but not in Jewish ceremonies), but we both know that this concept isn't new to us. We've committed to holding up our relationship through adventures and health, and through the lows of sickness and injuries.
So, the countdown is on. We need to order rings. We need to design our invites. We need to pick out a ketubah. Finalize our huppah design. We need to pick out food. And figure out what to wear. And how to light our venue. And order flowers. And learn how to dance. The list is long, but we'll get it done.
After all, those are just details. We've already worked out the important things.
How do you #ChooseLove? Show us through InterfaithFamily's fun new campaign! Watch this video to see how other people #ChooseLove.
Simplifying The Seven Blessings
Blessings have been on my mind lately. In the Jewish wedding ceremony there are seven blessings recited, and, for better or for worse, I'm finding them complicated. Which is why, when our house started to shake during a thunderstorm the other night, I was already awake turning blessing after blessing over and over in my mind.
The thunder rolled, the lightning flashed, and my mind immediately went to the damage that we'd seen this winter, wondering if this storm would re-expose those leaks. After a few minutes of almost deafening rain, my mind finally slowed past its catastrophic style thinking to an appreciation of all of the noises, smells, and feelings that accompany a thunderstorm.
I was thankful for the rain that we receive here in New England, as opposed the droughts that are impacting so much of our world. I was thankful that I was inside, and lucky enough to be safe from the elements. I was grateful to be cuddled up under my blanket next to my sleeping partner, with my sleeping cat in the nook behind my knees.
I noticed Justin stirring from his sleep. "Good thunderstorm," he muttered to himself.
It might seem simplistic, but right there… that was a blessing.
One of the pieces of Jewish learning I've most taken to heart is the idea that a prayer should speak to what is truly in your heart—the trappings of the words matter a whole lot less. (This idea seems particularly relevant when coming at the idea of one religion's prayer from a multi-faith lens.)
Which is why we're going to take the seven blessings and take them from complicated ideas to a simple "good thunderstorm" style message. But we need your help.
We're asking seven of our friends to craft their own blessings based on the meaning of the originals. They'll then be recited in the original Hebrew by our rabbi. What matters to us is less of the traditional language (we'll have our bases covered by our rabbi's recitations), but the sentiments passed along by the friends reciting the blessings.
Here's where we're asking for your help: if you were to simplify the following prayers to one word, what would it be?
I'd love to hear your thoughts in the comments below!
Finding a Ceremony Location that Fits
Where do you get married when you don't officially "belong" anywhere? This question, which seems rather dramatic, was the first hurdle of wedding planning.
Here are some places that we quickly checked off the list:
– A rotating wedding with stops at each temple or church where a friend of ours works as a rabbi and/or spiritual leader: problematic mostly as this particular world wide wedding tour would probably require a month long commitment for any wedding participant.
– My very first truly Jewish home, the Smith College Kosher Kitchen: while the space is filled with amazing memories of learning how to braid challah, welcoming Shabbat, and being part of true community, it's not exactly equipped for a wedding shindig.
– The churches that Justin attended growing up: a destination wedding wasn't something we were 100% opposed to, but asking family to trek out to the winding trail of places he called home (from Ohio to South Dakota back to Ohio and on to Pennsylvania) as he grew up wasn't exactly practical.
After all, as an interfaith couple with varied roots and no shared official physical spiritual home, there is no obvious, easy answer. And, as we look to bring together a diverse group of family and friends, we want to avoid the "eek" feeling that often accompanies being in someone else's religions home base. (We're introducing enough new things as it is!)
Our dramatic question of belonging (or a lack thereof) answered itself when we took a different tact to planning. When we rephrased the question from "where do you get married when you put religious tradition in the center" to "where do you get married when you put your own relationship in the center" the options started to reveal themselves.
A ceremony in a science museum? Why not? (Unless there are mummies—I have an irrational fear of mummies.)
A ceremony on a boat? Sure! (Weather permitting. And is one allowed to be both captain and bride?)
A ceremony in an abandoned theater with no lights, no running water, and a more than fine layer of dust? Yes. That's the winner.
When we looked at locations that had significance to us, a vacant theater became the obvious choice. Justin has been a part of a community of urban explorers for far longer than I've known him, and I've come to appreciate the beauty that is found in a place paused in time. We are people who, individually and as a couple, value adventure, the offbeat, finding experiences that might not jive with the norms—and so this feels more like "us" than any church or synagogue we might find.
I wouldn't go as far as saying that this is where we find our "sacred" … but, there is something holy about appreciating glamour where someone else might not look twice.
Taking a space, one that has been forgotten by its surroundings, and stepping back is a powerful experience. There's beauty in seeing a place for what it once was, what it is now, and what it could be. (And, isn't that the essence of a relationship? Appreciating all steps of the journey?) For us, the idea of transforming a quiet, slightly downtrodden theater into a site for a ceremony just makes sense. We're adding the lights, we're bringing in the huppah, but the magic of the building was already there.
Looking Back on Our Interfaith Wedding, One Month Later
It is hard to believe it has already been a month since our "big day."
It is finally starting to sink in.
It seems that we have not stopped moving since we got married. Between the holidays, Lisa's sister getting married, and my new employment opportunities, there has been barely a moment to sit and take it all in. However, this week, we received our photos and have been listening to our playlists from the ceremony and reception. It is certainly bringing us some cheer.
It was an incredible journey for us both. Physically, emotionally, and spiritually.
We had a lot of help along the way. So thank you everyone who helped. Friends, family, and loved ones. Thanks to all our wonderful vendors too. Thank you all who followed us both on this journey and the whole InterfaithFamily staff who gave us this opportunity to talk about and really explore what having an interfaith wedding is all about and meant to us. (I also apologize to our photographer because I had to resize all the photos to fit into this post, they simply do not do her work justice.)
After the wedding, we ended up answering a lot more questions than I thought. We had a lot of members of Lisa's family asking about the Ketubah ceremony, while others asked about the circling of one another toward the beginning of the ceremony.
We also received a ton of compliments. The donut table (instead of cake) was a huge success. You could not tell the difference between the adults and children because all of them kept staring at the table with hungry eyes, even with a belly full of delicious meatballs. Our Jewish friends also said that when it comes to the Hora, Lisa and I hit it out the park. It was their most fun moments of the wedding.
What's next in our journey? That is a great question. We are hoping after the New Year to settle down a little bit more. There should be some clarity in our close future. I also hope to attend temple more regularly. For the first time in awhile, we do not have a deadline for our life and maybe that is the best gift of marriage. It is what you do with it after the big day.


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Mary Lou Pfenning
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Joyann Maske
RE: Beecher
I actually found it on this website. http://www.findagrave.com/cgi-bin/fg.cgi?page=gr&GRid=82852101
Added by
Joyann Maske
on Sep 19, 2016 3:41 PM
Joyann Maske
Francis D Beecher
Hi, Mary Lou! I was looking for the son of one of my relatives named Francis Beecher. I saw that you had his parents down as Charles and Julie Beecher, but in the obituary I found about Francis D Beecher, Charles and Julie were his grandparents. His real parents were Belva Lockwood Beecher and James A. Beecher
Added by
Joyann Maske
on Sep 17, 2016 2:26 PM
Bruce Speck
RE: Jacob Light
Thanks for providing the information about the burial location of Jacob Light. I recently moved to Florida and hopefully some kind Find A Grave volunteer will photograph the grave marker for Jacob when it is placed at the cemetery.
Bruce Speck
Added by
Bruce Speck
on Sep 07, 2016 8:17 PM
Larry Smith
RE: Mabel Marie Zollman
Yes, she was his mother.
Father was DeArl Jaquay.
Added by
Larry Smith
on Aug 08, 2016 3:28 PM
Bruce Speck
RE: Jacob Light
Thanks for the information. I have three sets of Light grandparents who lived in Lebanon County, PA. According to my calculations, Jacob Light (1758-1837), is my 4th Great Grandfather, 1st Cousin, 7 generations removed and 1st Cousin, 8 generations removed. My connection to Jacob is through Joseph E. and Maria Light Strohm, who was the oldest child of Joseph E. and Catharine Bomberger Light. Please let me know if have any further contact with the Lebanon County DAR chapter. Thanks
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Bruce Speck
on Jun 07, 2016 5:29 PM
Pam Potter
Name Pfenning
Hi Mary. I'm not sure if Pfenning is your married or maiden name. Do you know if by any chance it had been shortened? My Pfenningsdorf's came to Germany to NY. When they moved to MI the spelling was changed to Fenningsdorf. Just wondering if we're related.
Added by
Pam Potter
on Jun 01, 2016 10:44 AM
Carol & Mel Hochstetler
RE: Stephen & Magdalena(Miller)Kauffman
Ruth left me a message, saying she didn't have any info on your Kauffmans. You can call if you have further questions. Or take a trip out there. Its a quarter mile West of the LaGrange County Line on CR 26 on the south side. Just a little further NW is Forest Grove at CR 24 & 43. Wish I could have been of better help. Good luck in your hunting. Carol
Added by
Carol & Mel Hochstetler
on May 06, 2016 9:27 AM
Carol & Mel Hochstetler
RE: Stephen & Magdalena(Miller)Kauffman
I have checked the records for the two trips that I made over there. I have nothing on the Kauffmans. That doesn't mean they aren't there. I was looking for Cobbums at the time.
This moring I put in a call to Ruth Eash, 574 825-3446 Middlebury Twp. Trustee, she's in charge of the cemetery. When she gets back to me I shall get back with you. Carol
Added by
Carol & Mel Hochstetler
on May 02, 2016 9:14 AM
Bruce Speck
RE: Jacob Light
Mary Lou,
Jacob Light and Veronica Ellenberger Light are my 4th great-grandparents, so I guess we're distant cousins. My source document shows that they were originally buried in a family plot on their farm, but were moved to the Ebenezer Cemetery at a later date. Apparently, the tombstone for Jacob did not survive over the years. I do not know of any organization in Lebanon County, PA, that is providing grave markers for veterans. You might want to check with the Lebanon County Historical Society (717-272-1473) to see if they can help with your request.
Bruce Speck
Added by
Bruce Speck
on Apr 10, 2016 7:18 AM
RE: Find A Grave Memorial# 73796777
Thanks, Mary. I'll be in Ohio in May. My brothers and I are setting the headstones for our parents then. I may drive up to Van Wert to visit those cemeteries. Thanks for all the work you do. Mike
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on Mar 25, 2016 11:40 AM
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A selection of seeds and plants with interesting leaves and different growing habits to give your beds, borders and containers an exotic flair. From low, dense border fillers to tall, leafy banana plants, there's something for every garden.
Blechnum brasiliense 'Volcano'
Dwarf Brazilian Tree Fern, Hard Fern
Golden Bamboo
Phyllostachys vivax f. aureocaulis, Golden Chinese Timber BambooWonderfully statuesque, the graceful stems of this Golden Bamboo will create a superb architectural focal point in your garden. The arching butter-yellow canes are attractively striped with green, while the slender bright green leaves remain evergreen for interest all year round. Easy to grow and fully hardy, Phyllostachys vivax f. aureocaulis has been awarded a prestigious RHS AGM, making an elegant specimen for borders or large patio containers. Grow bamboo towards the back of shrub borders, as an attractive screen for exotic gardens, or as a leafy under storey in woodland. Height: 6m (20'). Spread: 3m (10'). More info
Tree Fern 'House & Garden Mixed'Develops a trunk or caudex, like palms, as each frond dies. Mixture is drawn from Cyathea and Dicksonia species. Hardy in light to medium frost areas. Pack includes enough spores for 25 plants. More info
Musa sikkimensis
Banana, PlantainHere's a unique chance to grow this new hardy species of Banana, from the Himalayas. A strong and vigorous grower with tough green foliage, often flushed with ruby-red tints. Very hardy, tolerates wind and suitable for large containers or growing in the border.Height: 3-4m (9-12ft) More info
Musa lasiocarpa
Chinese Yellow Banana, Musella, PlantainAn unusual dwarf hardy banana reputed to be able to take temperatures as low as -10C (14F). This banana has exotic leaves followed by a yellow globular flower, once established. Plant in sun or partial shade outdoors or indoors in containers. More info
Musa velutina
Pink Banana, PlantainMore info
Banana - Exotic Seed Collection
Ensete ventricosum, Abyssinian Banana, Ethiopian Banana, Musa ensete, Musa arnoldiana
Decorative, huge leaves rivalling any expensive mature house plants. Grows 3ft in the first four months!More info
Ricinus communis 'Impala'
Castor Oil Plant, Castor BeanCustomer Rating
Striking maroon/carmine young growth. Clusters of creamy yellow blooms, followed by maroon pods. Height: 90-120cm (3-4ft). Additional Comments: These seeds are poisonous. More info
Thuja occidentalis 'Mirjam' (Large Plant)
ArborvitaeThis dwarf conifer forms a neat evergreen globe that will add structure to the garden all year round. The golden foliage of Thuja occidentalis 'Mirjam' takes on shades of burnt-orange, bronze and green during the winter months when there is little colour elsewhere in the garden. This compact evergreen makes a lovely specimen for a rockery or patio container, needing no maintenance whatsoever from year to year. Height and spread: 90cm (36"). More info
Euonymus japonicus (Large Plant)
Evergreen Spindle, Japanese Spindle TreeThis hardy evergreen shrub has a variety of uses in the garden; allowed to grow, Euonymus japonicus can be included in a hedge or screen, if kept clipped it can also be used as part of a formal border or bed as it will retain its shape with regular pruning. Evergreen Spindle is also suitable for coastal gardens and can be left alone as a stand-alone shrub too. Height: 400cm (157"). Spread: 200cm (79"). More info


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Melanie's true expertise is helping people discover the things about themselves they currently can't see. In other words, Melanie is an expert at facilitating breakthroughs for people. She is an expert at the kind of conversation that cracks people's minds open… freeing them from limiting beliefs and fears that have tainted and hindered their progress and results to this point. Intentional, open yet directed, often intense conversation gives Mel's clients powerful access to shifted perspectives that energetically show up as feeling more and more free, on fire, motivated, directed, clear, passionate, and purposeful the more between-the-ears shifts are achieved. These feelings grow over the long-term work, as do the external results to match. Mel is exceptionally gifted in facilitating the kind of conversation that is entirely free of judgment… oddly hilarious at times… and ultimately unparalleled in it's productivity and personal transformation through an ongoing developing team relationship and fierce accountability and continued honing and execution of her client's unique pursuits.
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Maria Pradella Pens LEON AND THE DRAGON SWORD
by BWW News Desk - August 08, 2016
Maria Pradella, a wife, mother, creative writer and author, has completed her new book 'Leon and the Dragon Sword': a vibrantly crafted work that takes the reader on a journey through magical kingdoms full of fantasy, fear and friendship. This work teaches the reader valuable life lessons through im... (more...)
Samhain Publishing Co-sponsors 10th Annual Indianapolis Horror Hound Weekend, 9/11
by BWW News Desk - September 09, 2015
CINCINNATI, Sept. 9, 2015 /PRNewswire-iReach/ International publisher Samhain Publishingwill be co-sponsoring the 10th annual IndianapolisHorrorHound Weekend, Sept. 11-13 th, 2015, at the Marriott Indianapolis East. HorrorHound Weekend, which draws several thousand readers, fans and movie enthusiast... (more...)
Leo DiCaprio & Martin Scorsese to Reteam for DEVIL IN THE WHITE CITY
by TV News Desk - August 11, 2015
Leonardo DiCaprio will once again team up with director Martin Scorsese for the big screen adaptaton of Erik Larson's best-selling novel, The Devil in the White City.... (more...)
David Alan Hoag Releases SHARING CHRISTMAS
by BWW News Desk - January 26, 2015
PLACENTIA, Calif.... (more...)
NOOK Launches Online Christmas Shop
by BWW News Desk - December 01, 2014
NOOK Media LLC, a subsidiary of Barnes & Noble, Inc. (NYSE:BKS), the leading retailer of content, digital media and educational products, today announced the launch of the NOOK Christmas Shop, a dedicated section on NOOK.co.uk featuring curated book lists and great offers to help customers discover ... (more...)
New Book Documenting Climate Change Negotiations Released During Climate Week
by BWW News Desk - November 26, 2014
NEW YORK, Nov. 26, 2014 /PRNewswire/ Award-winning photographer Henry Dallal was joined by leaders from across governments, academia, civil society, media, and entertainment to commemorate the launch during Climate Week in New York of Addressing Climate Change: An Illustrated Biography of the Annual... (more...)
PROPHECY UNRAVELLED is Released
by BWW News Desk - November 18, 2014
LARA, Australia... (more...)
This Week at Bookworks Features Maggie Romero with Merimee Moffitt, Allen Salkin and More
by BWW News Desk - October 16, 2014
Below are this week's events at Bookworks. For more information, visit bkwrks.com/event.... (more...)
Brand New Book Focuses Exclusively on Dining at the Most Magical Place on Earth
by BWW News Desk - October 05, 2014
"Dining at Walt Disney World - The Definitive Guide" Brand new book focuses exclusively on dining at the most magical place on earth. Today, RKA Media announced a unique new book that takes the mystery out of one of the most important but confusing elements of a Disney World Vacatio... (more...)
New Book Addresses Climate Change
by BWW News Desk - September 12, 2014
NEW YORK, Sept. 12, 2014 /PRNewswire/ In a stunning, timely new book that captures the art, science, and diversity of climate change negotiations, award-winning photographer Henry Dallal aims to humanize an arduous, largely-behind-the-scenes process and rally the world towards a global agreement. Th... (more...)
New Children's Book by Aubrey Ortiz and Eliana Ortiz Teaches Real Beauty
by BWW News Desk - September 12, 2014
Kapolei, Hawaii... (more...)
September's Featured Events at Bookworks Includes Deborah Madison Brunch, Lisa Lenard-Cook and More
by BWW News Desk - August 29, 2014
Below are Bookworks' featured events for the month of September. For more information on any of the events, visit bkwrks.com/event.... (more...)
'Polly Peebles and the Blue Necklace' is Released
by BWW News Desk - June 23, 2014
NEW ZEALAND... (more...)


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Beautiful detailing makes the Alegria Alli Professional Print a great addition to any look. This women's clog features a beautiful printed, stain resistant leather upper for comfort and durability. Enjoy the comfort your feet will get from the removable, cushioned cork and latex footbed. Double buckle details add an extra flair of style. This Alegria clog also has a rocker polyurethane slip resistant outsole that guides your step. Walk pretty in the Alegria Alli professional Print.
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WATCH: #IceBucketChallange On A Horse Goes Wrong
Posted August 26th, 2014 @ 4:18pm
Listen to The Daily Pulse on iHeartRadio
As the #IceBucketChallange continues to spread and raise awareness for ALS research people are coming up with new ways to do the challenge. From toilet water to chocolate there are plenty of variations on the challenge. One woman decided to dump a cold bucket of water over her head while sitting on the back of a horse. Unfortunately, it didn't quite go as she had planned.
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My husband was at a band concert the other day, and he took our 14 month old. He said our little one was talking and making noises but not yelling or screaming, but he received some looks and comments that people were not appreciative of our cute little one.
One person turned around and put the finger to the mouth "shhhh" sign. Another had the gull to come over to my husband and commet "Don't you think your son is a little young to be in the choir", and then someone else complained to my husbands friend.
I don't know how loud he was, but your at a band concert, its not like it was a chursh semon or anything. It was a free concert, so no one lost any good money if they didn't enjoy it because of one little kid.
My question is how would you handle the situation if someone came up to you and you didn't think your kid was being too loud?


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Police: Landlord lied about tenant putting her head through wallMarch 23,2013BENNINGTON A South Stream Road landlord was arraigned on Monday on a misdemeanor charge of calling in a false alarm after police said he falsely accused one of his tenants of putting her head through a wall and causing damage and destruction to her Beech Street apartment.
Thomas R. Dwyer Jr., 57, pleaded innocent to the charge in Bennington criminal court Monday. He was released without bail.
In an affidavit, Cpl. Andy Hunt, of the Bennington Police Department, said Dwyer called police on Feb. 27 around 3:40 p.m. Based on Dwyers description, three police officers and the Bennington Rescue Squad were dispatched to the apartment.
However, the tenant told police she didnt put her head through the wall. She said there was a hole in the wall put there by her ex-boyfriend three weeks previously and that she had reported it to Dwyer the day after it happened. On Feb. 27, she told police, she was having a problem because there was a raccoon in the ceiling of her apartment.
Dwyer told police he had been in the basement of the building and heard a loud bang. He said the tenant told him about the raccoon but he didnt believe her. Dwyer admitted that when he saw the size and shape of the hole in the wall, he assumed she had put her head through the wall.
Hunt said he told Dwyer he was being charged with providing a false alarm, and Dwyer then denied telling police his tenant put her head through the wall until he was told the call was recorded.MORE IN This Just InRutland got two goals from Eli Henni and Ryan McKay made three saves in notching the shutout as... Full StoryA New York woman allegedly told police she stole money from her sister to fund her drug habit. Full StoryA homeless man denied stealing his mothers wallet and using her credit cards to buy items to... Full Story
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Crazy golf, The Riverside, Reading, summer 2009
For more wordless entry visit WordlessWednesday.com or 5 Minutes for Mom.
If you came here looking for something interesting on the subject of Tiger Woods, apologies!
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I shall have to look else where for my sensationalist thrill then... *sigh*... of to look at the Daily Mail website...
This far nicer though. I would DEFINITELY have hit all the balls in the water though and not been allowed back :)
Looks like excellent fun. We love love love crazy golf in our family.
I used to live near Reading in Tadley.
I just can't stop wondering how many balls would go in the water.
OOh, I live near Reading. Sort of. In a West Berkshire kind of way. Loving her technique
I thought it was a bit ambitious to wear shorts in this weather! Sounds like fun, what the heck brought you to Reading?
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The Brothers Grimm mesmerized Broadway with an epic fairytale where worlds collide. James Lapine and Stephen Sondheim take everyone's favorite storybook characters, bringing them together for a timeless yet relevant piece and rare modern classic.


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Forests Campaign: For Businesses
Our Forest Campaign aims to make responsible forest trade the norm. Working alongside business, we aim to transform timber markets in the UK and Europe. That way, your business will benefit from a secure long-term supply, while people and nature can thrive in the forests they depend on.
Over fifty influential businesses plus two major trade associations have signed up to support the campaign - find out who they are here. If you are a business in the UK that buys timber or timber products and are interested in joining the campaign, please contact us by 30 November 2016.
Why are we running this campaign?
Our Forest Campaign seeks to cut out the trade in illegal and unsustainable timber, by working together with business to influence government at UK and EU level in order to level the playing field for businesses that are supportive of responsible forest trade.
With the review of the EU Timber Regulation, we have an opportunity to completely close the market to illegal timber. This Regulation, which came into force in March 2013, aims to stop illegal logged timber from entering the European markets – but has loopholes in it which mean that less than half the value of timber products coming into Europe is covered by the regulation.
Read our position statement on the product coverage of the EU Timber Regulation.
But closing the markets to illegal timber won't fix the problem – if we are to be able to rely on forests for the goods and services we depend on for generations to come, we need to be harvesting them sustainably. This campaign also calls for mechanisms to enable the transition to a market in sustainable timber by 2020.
What we've achieved so far
Businesses up their game
We reviewed our Timber Scorecard in September, and found that 23 companies have increased the transparency of their timber procurement policy since the original was published in July.
EU business backs a strong EUTR
Our cross-Europe Industry Statement in support of a strong EU Timber Regulation was supported by over 70 companies, associations and federations.
Many of these companies attended a reception with Commissioner Vella in Brussels to demonstrate their support for change.
MPs sign Early Day Motion on Illegal and Unsustainable Timber
Thanks to over 2,000 personal letters and emails written by members of the public, including staff from some of the businesses we have been working with such as Willmott Dixon and Lathams, almost 100 MPs signed Early Day Motion (EDM) 65 in support of a market in legal and sustainable timber in the UK and wrote about the issue to the Secretary of State for Defra, Liz Truss.
Over 100K to #SaveForests
Over 103,000 people have signed our #SaveForests petition so far, which we will continue to use to show government and businesses that consumers care that the wood products they buy are legally and sustainably sourced.
What can your business do?
This campaign gives your business the opportunity to show your commitment to responsible trade in forest goods.
Choose from the bullet points below for more information on how your business can support the campaign through these pledges:
- Pledge to buy sustainable timber products
Make a pledge to buy timber and timber products from sustainable sources by 2020, and make your performance public.
If enough businesses make this kind of commitment, we can show decision-makers that there's a powerful desire for change. Find out more about what this pledge means.
- Support the call to close the market to illegal timber
When you sign up to our timber campaign, you're supporting our call for the EU to close the loopholes in the EU Timber Regulation (EUTR) so that all timber and timber products must be from legal sources.
The Forest Campaign provides you with the opportunity to use your voice at a UK and EU level by joining the call to close our markets to illegal timber completely.
- Support the call for a market in sustainable timber
By signing up to the campaign, you're supporting our call to the UK and the EU to complete the transition to a market in sustainable timber and timber products by 2020.
We want to create a level playing field for companies that have made a commitment to responsible forest trade. This requires mechanisms or incentives that'll encourage other businesses to do the same.
Closing the market to illegal timber is only one step towards the ultimate goal of saving the world's remaining intact forests. If we really want to protect forests for future generations, we need to change the markets so they're only trading sustainably-sourced timber.
Using business support, we'll call on the UK government and the EU to establish mechanisms to be put in place by 2020 that will complete the transition to a trade in sustainable timber and timber products.
This is a crucial time to take action. The world's forests are shrinking fast – and demand for wood products is set to triple by 2050. We need to act urgently to ensure the long-term health of forests – and as one of the largest importers of timber in Europe, the UK plays an important role in influencing the markets.
If you are interested in signing up your business and help us make a positive change for our world forests, please contact us. As a reminder, we will be accepting companies to sign up to the campaign untill 30 November 2016.


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You're Ready To Adult If You've Nailed These 5 Things By Graduation
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U.S Midfielder Clint Dempsey (8) turns after scoring the team's second goal..USMNT defeated Guatemala 3-1 in World Cup qualifying play at LIVESTRONG Sporting Park, Kansas City, KS.
Impact pick up much-needed win over Earthquakes
The Montreal Impact benefited from a pair of first half goals to end their cold streak against the San Jose Earthquakes
SBI MLS Power Rankings (Week 30)
The Columbus Crew were the big movers in the latest SBI MLS Power Rankings
Atlanta United confident Gerardo Martino can buck trend of high-profile foreign coaches in MLS
Atlanta United and Gerardo Martino believe he can become one of the few high-profile foreign coaches to find lots of success in MLS.
MLS Week 31: A Midweek Look Ahead
Week 31 in MLS begins with massive games on Wednesday with plenty of playoff implications in every match.
Soccer Wednesday: Your Running Commentary
A rematch of last year's UEFA Champions League semifinal and a slate of midweek MLS games highlights the action on Wednesday.
Brooks set for return to centerback competition after missing time with injury
John Brooks has returned to Hertha Berlin training after missing three matches, but the defender may not make an immediate return to the starting lineup.
Klinsmann says there is 'no truth' to England links
Jurgen Klinsmann says there is "no truth" to rumors linking him with the England national team coaching job.


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Better Investing
If you're lying awake at night wondering if your 401(k) is properly invested, it's not much comfort to know that millions of other Americans are probably losing sleep over the same thing.
Safely saving for retirement doesn't have to be as complicated as we make it, however.
We "lack the confidence to effectively manage" our retirement savings, a poll by Charles Schwab concludes. It found, in a nationwide survey of more than 1,000 401(k) plan participants, that:
- More than half (52 percent) find explanations of their 401(k) investments more confusing than explanations of their health care benefits (48 percent).
- Fifty-seven percent wish there was an easier way to figure out how to choose the right 401(k) investments.
- Nearly half (46 percent) don't feel they know what their best investment options are, and one-third (34 percent) feel a lot of stress over correctly allocating their 401(k) dollars.
The crazy thing is, anxious investors are right. Our 401(k)s were never intended to be a primary path to retirement. They were developed in the 1980s for highly paid corporate executives to shelter additional investments from taxes – a supplement to their companies' old-fashioned pension plans. Later, companies decided to offer them to employees in place of traditional pension plans.
Although 401(k)s may not be ideal, they're what a large proportion of Americans have to work with. Here are seven ways to wring the most out of your retirement accounts:
1. At the very least, max out your employer contribution
Find out if your employer matches your 401(k) contribution and, if so, what the maximum contribution is. For example, if your employer matches your contributions dollar for dollar up to 6 percent of your $4,000 monthly salary, you'll get $240 free in your account for the first $240 you save. If you don't take advantage of your employer's match, you're throwing away free money.
Don't stop there, though. If you can, add more to your 401(k). The maximum the IRS allows you to save in a 401(k) in 2015, if you are 49 or younger is $18,000. Add another $6,000 if you're 50 or older.
2. Bone up on 401(k) investing
To start, watch this 90-second video primer for beginner investors. Your 401(k) allows you to choose among three types of investments:
- Stocks: When you see the word "growth" in the title of an investment option within your 401(k), that's a clue that stocks are involved. Stocks, basically ownership in a company, offer the most potential for reward, but they also present the greatest risk.
- Bonds: When you see "income" as an investment option, you're probably looking at a fund that contains bonds. While stocks are an "ownership" investment, bonds are "loanership." You're lending money to a company (corporate bonds), local government (munic ipal bonds) or Uncle Sam (treasury bonds). Bonds pay a fixed rate of interest, come due on a certain date and are backed by the company or government agency that issues them, all things that generally earn them the reputation of being safer and more stable than stocks.
- Cash: When you see the words "money market," you're probably seeing a fund that's basically a cash equivalent. Like a savings account, these funds don't earn much, but the risk is lower than either stocks or bonds.


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Tell me the Cowboys couldn't use a guy who could throw like this behind Romo.
Cavaliers have offered Anderson Varejao a championship ring. Does he take it?
In the middle of last season, the Cleveland Cavaliers let go of long-time Cav and fan favorite Anderson Varejao to make room for Channing Frye, a stretch four they thought would be more valuable in the playoffs. In hindsight it seems the right move.
After a cap clearing move in Portland, Varejao ended up on the bench of the Golden State Warriors. We all know the story from there, including Varejao getting some meaningful minutes after Andrew Bogut went down, but it wasn't enough for Golden State.
Which brings us to the awkward championship ring conversation. Usually, an iconic team player like Varejao would get one from the Cavaliers, but will Varejao want this one? From Marc Stein of ESPN:
Good on the Cavaliers for offering.
Is there a correct answer for Varejao? A wrong answer? I can't blame him either way.
He is on the Warriors roster again this season, and he once again could get meaningful minutes (now behind Zaza Pachulia). Does he decide that one with this team is what he wants (and will bet is going to happen)? Nobody can answer all these questions for him.
Nuggets retiring Dikembe Mutombo's number at first home game
If the Hawks can retire Dikembe Mutombo's number after four and a half seasons in Atlanta, the Nuggets can retire it after five in Denver.
Chris Dempsey of The Denver Post:
Mutombo will join the list of people who've had a number retired by multiple teams:
- Kareem Abdul-Jabbar (Lakers, Bucks)
- Charles Barkley (76ers, Suns)
- Wilt Chamberlain (Warriors, Lakers, 76ers)
- Clyde Drexler (Trail Blazers, Rockets)
- Julius Erving (Nets, 76ers)
- Michael Jordan (Bulls, Heat)
- Bob Lanier (Pistons, Bucks)
- Moses Malone (Rockets, 76ers)
- Pete Maravich (Jazz, Pelicans)
- Earl Monroe (Knicks, Wizards)
- Oscar Robertson (Bucks, Kings)
- Jerry Sloan (Bulls, Jazz)
- Nate Thurmond (Cavaliers, Warriors)
Shaquille O'Neal, who had his number retired by the Lakers, will also make the list this season, when the Heat will put his number in the rafters.
Mutombo spent his best years with the Hawks, but he was pretty darn good with the Nuggets, who drafted him No. 4 overall in 1991. He won a Defensive Player of the Year award and went to three All-Star games with Denver. Playing for the Nuggets, he also produced the most iconic image of his career: lying on the floor and clutching the ball in jubilation after Denver became the first No. 8 seed to upset the No. 1 seed (Seattle SuperSonics in 1994):
Draymond Green says he doesn't want to chase 74 wins: "It's brutal."
If the Warriors have been consistent about one thing in the run-up to the coming season it is this: They are not going for a record number of wins again.
From the GM on down they have worked to tamp down expectations about their regular season, saying there is no goal of chasing their 73-win total of last season. This is how Draymond Green put it on media day, via Sam Amick of the USA Today.
Last season Steve Kerr and some of the staff were hesitant to chase the Jordan-era Bulls 72-win record, but it was a push from the players — Draymond Green being at the front of that parade — who wanted it. They pushed, and Kerr let them. They got 73. Was that lack of rest down the stretch the reason they were down 3-1 to Oklahoma City in the Western Conference Finals, then blew a 3-1 lead in the NBA Finals against Cleveland? Certainly not, there were plenty of other bigger factors (hello LeBron James), but it may have played some role. Clearly, the team thinks it did, based on their words and actions.
However, the Warriors still want the No. 1 seed in the West and will make that a goal. The question is, with an excellent regular season team in San Antonio — one that had a better point differential than the Warriors last season, then they added Pau Gasol — how many wins will it take to get the top seed in the West? 65? More? How hard will the Warriors and Spurs push to get home court throughout?
The Warriors aren't going for the record, but the top of the West is still going to be an interesting place.
Mike D'Antoni declares James Harden the Rockets' point guard ('points guard')
James Harden is no longer the NBA's best shooting guard.
Rockets coach Mike D'Antoni said Harden – who averaged 29.0 points and 7.5 assists per game last season – is now Houston's point guard, though D'Antoni added it wouldn't be a big adjustment.
D'Antoni, via ClutchFans:
With James, we'll make a cheap joke. He'll be a points guard.
We just renamed it. You guys got something to write about.
Harden already controlled the ball a ton, taking primary playmaking and distributing responsibilities last season. This just gets the ball into his hands quicker and should allow the Rockets to play faster, a key component of D'Antoni's offense.
Of course, D'Antoni's offense functioned best when Steve Nash – more of a pure passer – ran it with the Suns. Harden won't duplicate that. His passing ability is more predicated on taking advantage of his scoring threat. But Harden – who, like Nash, is an excellent ball-handler – could make the offense hum in his own way.
Even though D'Antoni is trying to downplay the position switch, it's a notable shift. Harden fully commanding the offense is a grand experiment with major upside (and potential for a rocky downside).
This will also allow Houston to use Patrick Beverley (historically a point guard) or Eric Gordon (historically a shooting guard) in the backcourt with Harden, allowing a more flexible rotation.


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Vector graphics with Inkscape
When it comes to drawing with the computer, professionals often opt for vector graphics. Inkscape brings the power of vector graphics to Linux users. Our workshop demonstrates how to use the program.
Although you may be a genius with pen and paper, drawing directly on your computer will not always give you the glossy results you are looking for. When lines turn to squiggles, professionals turn to Bézier curves to help them draw smooth lines, with anchor points to define the path of the curve and tangents to define radii.
Even though major bitmap editors such as GIMP support Bézier curves, it takes a vector graphics program to leverage their true power [1].
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Nextcloud Announces Raspberry Pi-Powered Home Cloud Box
Innovative system adds a hard drive and Ubuntu Core to the RPi for an IoT hub.
Linus Torvalds Confirms the Date of the First Linux Release
Linux is two weeks younger than we thought!
End of OpenOffice?
The Apache Software Foundation considers retiring OpenOffice
Adobe Gives New Life to NPAPI Plugin for Linux
Adobe won't kill the plugin in 2017
LinuxCon North America Convenes in Toronto, Canada
Linux Foundation's big event celebrates the 25th anniversary of Linux
Linux Turns 25
Linux has evolved from "won't be a professional" project to one of the most professional software projects in the history of computers.
Mirantis Joins Hands with SUSE To Offer RHEL Support; Red Hat Not Happy
Competitors get in the game with RHEL without Red Hat
Linux on Windows 10 Poses a Security Risk
Security researchers have already notified Microsoft; some fixes are available
Mirantis to Refactor OpenStack Fuel for Kubernetes
The company is collaborating with Google and Intel to use Kubernetes as an engine for Fuel
Canonical Joins Document Foundation Advisory Board
The upcoming release of LibreOffice will be available as a snap package


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Mister Clipping Launches in the UK
Online graphics service provider Mister Clipping has launched in the UK for the first time, providing a photo-clipping service for professional-looking images starting at less than £1. Designed for graphic arts professionals, marketers, brand managers, advertising agencies, mail order services, and photographic studios, it allows users to choose the options they need for individual work paths, masks, resizing or scaling, re-colouring or retouching, or isolating images according to their needs. Through the Misterclipping.com website, users are able to upload and download images quickly, using its automated wizard. Mister Clipping provides a guarantee to isolate and return images via the application within 24 hours, regardless of the number of images to be processed.
Misterclipping Press Release
Misterclipping.com launches in UK for quick, professional clipping and image service for designers, publishers and photographers
Starting at less than £1 per image, new web-based clipping service isolates images from backgrounds
MISTERCLIPPING.COM, LONDON, November 23, 2011 - Online graphics service provider Mister Clipping (http://www.misterclipping.com) has launched in the UK for the first time, providing a photo-clipping service for quick professional looking images starting at less than £1.
Designed for graphic arts professionals, marketers, brand managers, advertising agencies, mail order services, and photographic studios, it provides a quick, online service for image clipping. It allows users to choose the options they need for individual work paths, masks, resizing or scaling, re-colouring or retouching, or isolating images according to their needs.
Supported by a dedicated team of imaging professionals, Mister Clipping takes away the burden of time consuming clipping and cropping operations needed for web design, brochures, promotional literature, photo albums or any other form of design.
The Mister Clipping service uses a skilled team of experts to isolate objects from their background using clipping paths or masks. They can also provide any additional processing entirely by hand, producing an expert final result. Special finishes, including 'invisible man' techniques for cut out shots of clothing, or colour processing, are also available on request.
Built around Misterclipping.com's easy-to-use website, users are able to upload and download images quickly and easily using its unique automated wizard. Mister Clipping provides a guarantee to isolate and return images via the application within 24 hours, regardless of the number of images to be processed.
Mister Clipping can process a single image, or thousands, depending on users' needs and requirements. Costing between 75p and £5 per image, depending on the complexity of the task, the service also offers to redo any job free-of-charge if the customer is unhappy with the end result.
Chi Lau, UK Business Development Manager at Mister Clipping says: "We have been running Mister Clipping in The Netherlands, the US, and Germany for many years now with great success. Following the successful expansion of the application and through thorough testing, Misterclipping.com is now ready for the UK market as part of our international growth.
"Our customers simply demand that we are fast, good and inexpensive. And of course they want the best service. We are an online company, but if our customers have a need for it we will be able to speak to them in their own language and in their own time zone, which now includes our fully supported office in the UK."
The entire auxiliary process (such as uploading, giving instructions, checking, downloading, etc.) is automated, proving a quick, easy and cost effective way to process multiple orders. In addition to processing images 24/7 and providing an online feedback service, skilled Dutch, English, German and French-speaking support staff are available by phone during normal office hours (8.30 to 5.30pm, Monday to Friday).
Mister Clipping is now available in the US, Germany, the UK, France, Italy, Belgium, The Netherlands and Scandinavian countries, providing a true level of international support.
About Mister Clipping
Mister Clipping was founded in 2005 and currently has around several hundred full-time Desk Top Publishers working at various locations worldwide. Mister Clipping's headquarters is in Haarlem, the Netherlands.
Services include:
• Isolating images (handmade Clipping paths)
• Image masking (Channel/Layer/Soft)
• Individual / multiple Work Paths / Masks
• Image Cropping, Straightening and Resizing
• Image Shadowing (Natural/ Drop/ Reflective)
• Photo Manipulation and Creative Processing
• Colour processing / Recolouring
• High-end Photo Retouching and Restoration
• Industry Specific Solutions (Example: "Invisible Man" for fashion)
Mister Clipping Users
With the Misterclipping.com application it is as easy to have one image processed as it is 100 (or 100,000). Mister Clipping is used worldwide by:
• DTP studios
• Lithographic companies / Prepress companies
• Photographers/Photo studios
• Database publishers
• Printers
• Publishers
• Advertising / communication / design agencies
• Brands
• Store chains / franchise companies
• Mail order companies / online retailers
• Wholesalers and manufacturing companies
• Private use
Your Comments
21 Comments | Newest Oldest First | Post a Comment
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Zenith–it specialize in high volume image editing company in Bangladesh. Within budget, on time and in accordance with your high quality standards. Customer service should not just be satisfactory… it should be extra ordinary by Zenith–It services. Our highly trained teams edit thousands of images per day, delivered within 24 hours.
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For years, Dave has represented clients as national coordinating counsel, including R.J. Reynolds in smoking and health actions and Wyeth in actions involving prescription antidepressants. He recently represented Bayer in an arbitration in which Recoly challenged Bayer discontinuing development of a hemophilia product, and Recoly's claims were denied. Dave previously was in-house counsel at a major accounting firm.
Dave coauthored Drug and Device Product Liability Litigation Strategy (Oxford Univ. Press 2012); the Ohio chapter in Product Liability Desk Reference: A Fifty-State Compendium (Wolters Kluwer 2015); Voluntary Client Testimony As A Privilege Waiver: Is Ohio's Law Caught In A Time Warp?, 59(1) Clev. St. L. Rev. 1 (2011); and The Meaning Of The Parallel Requirements Exception Under Lohr and Riegel, 65(3) N.Y.U. Ann. Surv. Am. L. 545 (2010). His pro bono representations include Raymond Towler, who was exonerated by new DNA test results in 2010 after 29 years in prison, and Douglas Prade, who seeks a new trial after he was excluded from male DNA found over where the murderer bit the victim.
Experience Highlights
Reynolds American sells Natural American Spirit International businesses to JT Group for $5 billion
Reynolds American acquires Lorillard for $27.4 billion
R.J. Reynolds resolves hundreds of Engle progeny cases in Florida federal courts
Honors & Distinctions
Ohio Super Lawyers (2007, 2009-2015) - personal injury products: defense