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All Blog Posts Tagged 'anxiety' - Mom Bloggers Club 2016-09-26T22:47:55Z http://www.mombloggersclub.com/profiles/blog/feed?tag=anxiety&xn_auth=no #growingupwithanxiety : More Than a Trending Hashtag tag:www.mombloggersclub.com,2016-07-02:988554:BlogPost:1721761 2016-07-02T01:00:00.000Z Christina Hudler http://www.mombloggersclub.com/profile/ChristinaHudler550

Every time I log into Twitter, the first thing I do is check the Trends. Sometimes I click through a few of them, often times I don't, but today there is one that really hits home for me. That one is #growingupwithanxiety.

I was diagnosed with social anxiety disorder and generalized anxiety disorder soon after my second child was born and my marriage to my (now ex-)husband was ending. Up until I sought out a therapist, I really believed that everything I had…

Every time I log into Twitter, the first thing I do is check the Trends. Sometimes I click through a few of them, often times I don't, but today there is one that really hits home for me. That one is #growingupwithanxiety.

I was diagnosed with social anxiety disorder and generalized anxiety disorder soon after my second child was born and my marriage to my (now ex-)husband was ending. Up until I sought out a therapist, I really believed that everything I had struggled with in my entire life was normal. I thought panic attacks were normal. I thought not wanting to be around people was normal. I thought everyone felt like their chest was going to cave in when they were upset. I thought it was the norm because it was my norm.

I'm so thankful to the amazing team of therapists that I got to know during that time. My regimen to "get better" began with weekly therapy, bi-weekly peer counseling, and a suggestion to begin taking anti-anxiety medication. I began the therapy and peer counseling right away, but meds? Why would I want to be a zombie?  Why would I want to put all these unnatural chemicals in my body? What would my crunchy mom friends think?

I declined to begin a medication regimen and continued my therapy sessions. For a while this worked beautifully. I was happier in my day-to-day life and I found myself having fewer panic attacks. I still felt like my heart leapt up into my throat every time I tried to back out of a parking space while someone was waiting to take my spot, but it was progress and I was positive that it would continue to get better.

…but then it didn't.

If anything, it got worse. I tried to hide how I felt behind smiles and laughs because I wanted everyone around me to think therapy was working.

…but it wasn't.

I didn't know what to do, and I felt lost. I didn't want to share with anyone what I was going through because now I knew it wasn't normal, I assumed they wouldn't understand. The mere thought of talking to someone about it, even my therapist, had me shaking and nauseous. So for a while, I swallowed all the pain I was going through and I kept on truckin'.

A few years passed and I found myself managing a local organic market. Customers would often come in with lists of supplements to take for this or that, and one day a woman came in with a list for her anxiety. "This is it, I can take these!" I thought I had found the golden ticket. Plus, these were things I wasn't afraid to tell my crunchy mom friends I was taking. Some magnesium and some passion flower, perfect! I knew this would help!

…but then it didn't.

They seemed to help for a little while, but I now believe it was wishful thinking. I decided that anxiety was something I would have to live with because nothing was going to work. This was it for me….

…but it wasn't.

In 2015 I met an amazingly strong woman named Angie Porter, the owner here at The Jacksonville Doulas. Over the past year she has shown me so much love and compassion, even though I didn't always deserve it. The best part is she's the kind of friend that doesn't tell you what you want to hear, she tells you what you need to hear. And what I needed to hear was that I needed medication, real medication and not herbal supplements. With being around me daily as we built TJD from the ground up, she knew that my anxiety was taking over. I was beginning to have panic attacks almost every day and it was affecting my quality of life.

Nearly seven years after the first time I was told that I should consider medication, I went for it. I was diagnosed with social anxiety disorder again, but now my generalized anxiety had been replaced with panic disorder. I began a regimen of Zoloft and I want to share something with all of you.

It was the best decision I ever made for my mental health.

 I understand that medication isn't the route for everyone, but it was the right path for me. It was a turning point in my life that I will never forget. My panic attacks completely went away. My over analyzation of every moment of my life stopped. Within weeks the people in my life knew something was different and it wasn't that I was a zombie. No I was normal, well, whatever that even means. I got my life back! I could breathe again.

Looking back, it was the stigma that surrounds being medicated that kept me from this life changing drug. I almost lived my life in a near-constant state of panic to avoid having to tell my more natural-minded friends that I was taking medication. This is not okay. It reminds me of something that Kristen Bell heard from her mother, "The world wants to shame you for taking medication to help yourself, but it's important to remember that in the medical community, no one would deny a diabetic his insulin."

If you thought that going at this illness alone was working…but it's not, please don't be afraid to seek out help. There is a great place right here in Jacksonville that can help you with whatever you're going through, anxiety or otherwise, called RHA Mental Health. They even have a mobile crisis unit that can visit you wherever you are, even if that somewhere is having a panic attack in the Taco Bell Drive thru.

Tomorrow the #growingupwithanxiety trend may end, but for those of us #livingwithanxiety it will continue to be something we battle every day.

#growingupwithanxiety is more than a trending hashtag, it's my life.
 …or at least it was.

(Original Post Can Be Found at #growingupwithanxiety : More Than a Trending Hashtag)
 Being more than Mrs. Mommy tag:www.mombloggersclub.com,2016-06-15:988554:BlogPost:1718667 2016-06-15T10:41:35.000Z Lauren Markman http://www.mombloggersclub.com/profile/LaurenMarkman
I have two t-shirts that I thought I had specially made just for fun. The first one was shortly before my wedding. I had it made to say "Mrs. XXXXX" (but instead of the Xs, it was my husband's name). The second was right after my son was born and it says XXXXXX's Mom (but instead of the Xs, it has my son's name).…

I have two t-shirts that I thought I had specially made just for fun. The first one was shortly before my wedding. I had it made to say "Mrs. XXXXX" (but instead of the Xs, it was my husband's name). The second was right after my son was born and it says XXXXXX's Mom (but instead of the Xs, it has my son's name).

I didn't think about them much at the time. They were fun to make and I still sometimes wear them to make the men in my life smile. For example, I wore the shirt with my son's name on it for Mother's Day, and he was thrilled.

 But, maybe...just maybe, I had the shirts made because I was trying to balance my old identity with my new role in life.

 That sounds deep, but there may be some truth to back that up, as a researcher recently reviewed Facebook posts and self-identified emotions by first-time Moms to discover that there may be a link between the amount a Mom posts to social media and her overall anxiety around being a Mother, and that she may have difficulty identifying herself in her new role. The researchers speculate that this may be why so many new mothers use their children's image for their profile picture.

 The study also gives a deep dive into pressures that new Moms may feel to be perfect. It is a flawed study, due to the small sample size and its limitations to not include a very diverse portfolio of women, but there seems to be a kernel of truth for me: I am more than just Mrs. Mommy, and sometimes it is easy to forget that. But, it is important for us all to remember who we are and who we want to be.

 Go onto Facebook and take a look at your profile photo. Is it a picture of you or is it a picture of your child? Tell me why in the comments.
 Driving Anxiety 101 – Thirteen years in the making. tag:www.mombloggersclub.com,2016-02-26:988554:BlogPost:1690621 2016-02-26T14:39:59.000Z MamaMadHatter http://www.mombloggersclub.com/profile/MamaMadHatter
 First Step: Experience a traumatic event in which you feel you have no control.

When I turned thirty, my world shrunk drastically. I took a road trip with my three year old from North Florida to the Appalachian mountains in my 15 year old crappy Toyota van to visit another single mom friend. We never made it to the mountains. Instead, the van's electrical…

First Step: Experience a traumatic event in which you feel you have no control.

When I turned thirty, my world shrunk drastically. I took a road trip with my three year old from North Florida to the Appalachian mountains in my 15 year old crappy Toyota van to visit another single mom friend. We never made it to the mountains. Instead, the van's electrical system failed on a deserted state road in the pitch black of night at 11pm. This was before the days of affordable smart phones and GPS, so I had no idea exactly where I was. Thankfully, I did have a TracFone with a few minutes on it and was able to call for AAA towing services (Thanks for the membership, Mom!). I had planned to go camping in the mountains, so the van was packed full with coolers of food, futon mattress, tent, etc. My three year old was scared; I was scared. I had only a few hundred dollars in my wallet and no money in my bank account. I was a struggling single mom and nursing student with two jobs. This was supposed to be a vacation for my daughter and I and it was all that we could afford at the time. So we ended up having the van towed to the nearest city around: Charleston, SC. We spent a week in a motel there, cooking outside on my camp stove, while waiting for the mechanic shop to repair my van. I called my parents in Florida and asked to borrow money to pay for the repairs and finance our trip home.

As luck would have it, the van drove its final mile just outside St. Mary's, FL on the return trip home and my young daughter and I found ourselves stranded again. My parents came to the rescue, driving us back to our hometown in FL a few hours away, but the trauma of that event scarred my brain forever.

Once we returned home, I eventually secured an old Hyundai two-door sedan with failing brakes, I began to notice that anytime I took highways or the interstate around my town, that I started to breathe a little faster, my peripheral vision darkened, and I would experience a light-headed sensation that I'd never had before. I began to worry that there was something wrong with my body, and for a single mom with no health insurance, this was extraordinarily frightening.

Second Step: Adapt your life to fit the problem.

Rather than face the issue, however, I simply adapted my driving routes to fit my psyche, avoiding large intersections, highways, and the interstate. When I needed to go out of town for fun or for nursing school clinical rotation, I asked another nursing student or family member to drive me. This adaptation worked nicely over the next five years, until shortly after graduation when I was offered a fantastic and well-paying job in a state 2000 miles from home.

With the help of my family, I packed up my household and moved my daughter and I to the Southwest to embark on a new adventure. My mother rented a car and drove my eight-year old daughter and I the 2000 miles to our new destination and helped us settle in for a week before she returned to FL. As I looked around my new surroundings, I was suddenly panic-stricken: how was I going to drive in this large metropolis of over a million people? The new city had two interstates passing right through the middle of it and most roads were at least four lanes, if not six. I was now terrified of the choice I'd made.

I realized that I had to drive outside of my preferred comfort zone to survive in my new town, so I forced myself to navigate the main roads of the city, pulling off of the road every few minutes when my vision was too blurry, my heart rate too fast, my breathing too rapid, and my palms too sweaty to stay in my lane. My young daughter, confused by all the stops, complained and asked when we were going to get to the ice skating rink/pizza place/grocery store/etc.

As I had done in my hometown, I quickly learned to adapt my life to the parameters of my anxiety. I mapped out routes on Google to the closest grocery store, doctor's office, pharmacy, etc. and limited my entertainment to nearby venues. Luckily, both my daughter's elementary school and my workplace were located within a couple of miles from our home. Additionally, we were able to walk to restaurants, health food store, local shops, and to rely on public transportation when traveling to places further away in the city, like the zoo.

Each time I did need to drive someplace outside of my comfort zone, I went over the route repeatedly in my head for hours, and sometimes even several days, before the event. I always made sure that I had extra time to travel, as odds were likely that I would need to pull over at least once during the journey due to having a panic attack. I was able to function this way for eight years, minimizing my panic attacks and meeting my the basic needs of my daughter and I. This all changed, however, after I married and became pregnant with my second daughter.

In my first trimester of pregnancy, I suddenly started having trouble driving the quarter mile to the grocery store without having a severe anxiety attack. Driving out of my neighborhood brought on intense feelings of panic. I lost all peripheral vision, my heart beat so fast I felt like I was going to have a heart attack, I began to hyperventilate, I felt like I was floating out of my body and as if I no longer had control over the car, I could feel myself drifting into the other lanes and was convinced that I was going to crash into an on-coming vehicle. My palms sweated profusely, making it difficult to grip the wheel, which further induced my sense of panic.

To combat this, I rolled down the window, cranked up the air conditioner, blasted music, drank water, and told myself it wasn't real, but to no avail. Ultimately, I ended up pulling off the road waiting for the panic to subside. Sometimes I waited for forty-five minutes for my heart rate and breathing to return to normal and for me to work up the courage to start driving again.

The situation got even worse after my second daughter was born. I began to rely on my husband to drive me everywhere and I stopped going out with my friends as often. I became extremely embarrassed about my panic attacks and lack of control over my anxiety. I didn't want to tell my friends that I was not able to drive to the events they invited me to, and I didn't like always asking my husband to haul me everywhere all the time. My solution was to become very reclusive. I rarely left the house, except to take walks in my neighborhood; I declined invitations, blaming it on my newborn child. I also was not able to ride on the interstate as a passenger anymore without putting my head between my knees or I would have a panic attack.

Third Step: Attempt to recover.

Illustration Credit: Trinity Moss

EMDR therapy:

At home with a baby all day and no social outlets, I became depressed. My husband, worried about me, made an appointment with a therapist who specialized in eye movement desensitization and reprocessing (EMDR). After two sessions with the EMDR therapist, I felt more confident and began driving short distances again. I was able to go to the grocery store, the park, and the coffee shop without panic attacks. I was elated! However, as months wore on, slowly I felt the fingers of anxiety choking my mental balance and one sunny afternoon on my way to the grocery store with my infant and preteen daughters, I suffered another driving anxiety event. It scared me so much that I called my husband away from his job to meet us in the parking lot of the store and drive us home. I felt like a failure. I was too afraid to drive anymore and too embarrassed to reach out for help again. Once more, I became a prisoner of my own mind, cloistered in the safe haven of my home. My friends stopped inviting me to events over time and I felt even more isolated. My oldest daughter had to rely on my husband and other friends' parents to drive her around to her numerous middle school activities. The sense of shame I had about this continued to grow, as I felt that I was not longer a whole person, capable of meeting my children's needs. My husband was now tasked with taking me to and from my new job, carting the children to all doctors' appointments, running errands, etc. My anxiety was placing a huge strain on our marriage. Simultaneously, I felt intense guilt and resentment that I had to rely on him to meet all of our needs.

Medication:

I was convinced that nothing would help me, so I continued to muddle through each day without hope of change. This shifted drastically for me one day, however, while sitting in a mandatory training at my new job. I was in the front row, listening to the instructor describe the goals and objectives of the class when I was overcome with a rush of dizziness and a certainty that I was going to fall out of my chair and pass out on the floor. It took all of my concentration to calm the buzzing sensation in my head and focus my eyes on the instructor until the next fifteen minute break. I did not retain anything the speaker told us and was certain that I was not going to pass the class (thus losing my job). As soon as I had a break, I called my primary care physician (PCP) and made an appointment to discuss medication.

The PCP placed me on Zoloft, which helped calm my mind during work hours, but did not help me with driving at all. I was still having panic attacks while driving but at least I was able to make it through my work day again and focus on my job. The PCP increased the dose of Zoloft, in the hopes that it would help with my driving anxiety too. Instead, it induced different panic attack symptoms: I began to have chest pains and shortness of breath. A medical workup was ordered and deduced that I was not having a heart attack – just experiencing panic in a new and different way. After a year of trial and error with various medications, I was quite frustrated with the medication route and weaned myself off of them completely.

Homeopathy:

My next attempt at handling the anxiety was homeopathy. I went to a homeopathic physician, recommended to me by a friend. After an appointment that was several hours long, in which I gave a thorough family health history and detailed account of my struggle with driving anxiety over the past decade, I was given a little brown glass bottle of small white pellets to dissolve under my tongue three times a day. Dutifully, I took them as suggested, and after two weeks I attempted a solo driving trip to my job, which was less than two miles from my home. As I pressed down on the gas pedal to keep up with the forty-five mile per hour traffic, I felt my face become flushed, my heart beat faster, my breathing increase, my palms sweat, and my vision begin to blur; another panic attack was in full swing.

Psychotherapy:

With three failed therapies behind me, I decided to try psychotherapy. I began sessions with a very skilled therapist that was recommended to me by a family member. After several months of treatment, and very little progress, we mutually decided to take a break from therapy. I was at a complete loss now.

Photo Credit: Trinity Moss

Exercise and diet:

Finally, I decided to commit to regular cardiovascular exercise and dietary changes. I began reducing my caffeine intake, eliminating refined sugar, and eating smaller meals more frequently throughout the day to balance my blood sugar. Of all the therapies I have tried, this is the only combination that has produced had the best results. After a month of consistent exercise and a healthy diet, I was able to drive five to ten miles from my home without experiencing a panic attack. I was also able to ride on the interstate as a passenger in a car without having a panic attack.

Illustration Credit: Trinity Moss

Fourth Step: Accept where you are.

Where I am today:

I still have anxiety daily and I do experience the beginnings of panic attacks while driving, but now I am able to manage them and continue on my journey. I've learned to keep high protein/low sugar foods available in the car, like almonds, and to not drive on an empty stomach. Limiting my caffeine intake to one cup of coffee in the morning has helped keep my heart rate in a healthy range, as well as exercising for at least thirty minutes a day. I am slowly reestablishing contact with my friends and getting out of the house for social events. I still plan out my driving routes before I leave my home and occasionally I have to call my husband to talk me through an anxious event, but I do not have to pull off the road and wait it out anymore. I have a long way to go before I am able to drive with confidence across town, and I am not certain that I will ever be able to do that again. I have found when I tell people what I am experiencing, contrary to my fears, they are overwhelmingly sympathetic, and that I am the only one stigmatizing myself. I am trying to forgive myself for not being the anxiety-free person I once was, to deal with the feelings I have now, and to accept that I have an anxiety disorder.

Photo Credit: Trinity Moss

*All artwork and photos were created by my extremely talented daughter, Trinity Moss.*

This article is also featured in "You and Me" magazine: http://www.youandmemagazine.com/articles/driving-anxiety-thirteen-years-in-the-making

**Original post appears on MamaMadHatter Musings: https://mamamadhatter.wordpress.com/2016/01/27/driving-anxiety-101-thirteen-years-in-the-making/
 Doggie days and crazy cat ladies tag:www.mombloggersclub.com,2015-12-11:988554:BlogPost:1667409 2015-12-11T10:40:43.000Z Lauren Markman http://www.mombloggersclub.com/profile/LaurenMarkman
We are not a dog family. My husband and I are not particularly fond of dogs, so our son is not very fond of them either.…

We are not a dog family. My husband and I are not particularly fond of dogs, so our son is not very fond of them either.

But for people who do like dogs, they are probably already aware that dogs reduce stress, especially in children. The cycle of play, responsibility and companionship that a dog provides children has been linked to less anxiety overall.

 We are a cat family. And here's the thing: Owning a cat has been linked to schizophrenia. Granted, that link mostly has to do with a parasite that a cat could have (which may or may not have added to the crazy cat lady stereotype), but all the same, I don't think it is fair for people to think that cats don't reduce anxiety as well.

 We adored our family cats. And our son still received the same cycle of play, responsibility and companionship. I think that any pet can contribute to reduced anxiety as long as the entire family likes the pet. So go ahead and get your dog, cat, hamster or ferret - whatever it is that you love in life.

 Do you have a family pet? What kind? Tell me in the comments.
 A Serelax Bottle that Saved my Social Life tag:www.mombloggersclub.com,2015-12-05:988554:BlogPost:1666168 2015-12-05T11:35:03.000Z sophie addison http://www.mombloggersclub.com/profile/sophieaddison

If you've been feeling depressed for more than a few weeks, it is important that you make an appointment to see your GP. It will be helpful so that you can discuss your symptoms with them and probably recommend treatments that could help you feel better. It can also be helpful to try some coping…

If you've been feeling depressed for more than a few weeks, it is important that you make an appointment to see your GP. It will be helpful so that you can discuss your symptoms with them and probably recommend treatments that could help you feel better. It can also be helpful to try some coping techniques. There are loads of resources online that can help you cope with depression but a little professional help comes in handy.

Symptoms of depression include:

Prolonged sadness or unexplained crying spells

Significant changes in appetite and sleep patterns

Irritability, anger, worry, agitation, anxiety

Pessimism, indifference

Loss of energy, persistent lethargy

Unexplained aches and pains

Feelings of guilt, worthlessness and/or hopelessness

Inability to concentrate, indecisiveness

Inability to take pleasure in former interests, social withdrawal

Excessive consumption of alcohol or use of chemical substances

Recurring thoughts of death or suicide

I have been in that situation and I can't say I was good at dealing with depression. In fact, the more I worried about it the more my situation got worse. Luckily, I was no quitter. The first step always starts with acceptance of the condition and taking some steps to deal with it. I was lucky to have someone who already knew enough of depression; my cousin. He worked for a mental clinic and thus he had the knowledge and the tools to manage it. He recommended me to start using Serelax.

Serelax is a 100% all natural product that is known to effectively address the various and debilitating symptoms of Depression, Anxiety, and stress. Serelax has been designed to deal with the symptoms of common mood disorders without causing harmful side effects or addiction – like it has been characteristic of many depression medication. This product employs a safe and natural approach to depression with such effectiveness as prescription medications but with no side effects.

All natural, nonprescription strength Serelax is assumed to figure on each serotonin and norepinephrine by correcting the imbalance of those 2 chemicals within the brain. Leaving you feeling calm, level headed and most significantly, happy!

How Serelax is Different?
What separates Serelax from other depression, stress and anxiety products is its distinctive proprietary blend of ingredients. Serelax ingredients include;

L-Theanine,- this is the most active ingredient in serelax. It has been extensively researched and documented as being efficient in considerably reducing mental, physical and social symptoms of anxiety, depression, insomnia, and irritability.

Other ingredients are;5-HTP , Valerian, and Kava Kava are clinically shown to considerably improve symptoms of depression and cut back anxiety.

According to the official website, Serelax can "replenish and restore the important neurotransmitters necessary to keep up a cheerful, healthy and stress free life. Let nature nurture your mind back to a balanced state with Serelax"

Why I chose it?

It was recommended by my dear cousin

100% Safe, Natural and Effective!

Safely & Effectively reduces anxiousness/sadness and stress

Improves your over all physical and mental well-being

Relieves feelings of anxiousness, panic attacks and sadness

Gives you an overall calming effect

Dramatically improves your health

Is non-sedating, non-addictive, and has no side effects

Does serelax work?
Of course it does work otherwise I wouldn't be using it. I someone who is very selfish when it comes to my body. This means, I carefully vet any product I use. From my skin care products all the way to the shoes I wear. I used the supplement for one month, then stopped taking it to ensure I can live without it. I am mean; I love myself. I don't want to be enslaved by a bottle of pills. I have heard stories of people who can't stop taking their prescription medicine, but with this one, you can take them as long as you want without the fear of getting addicted.

Bottom line
I would recommend this supplement to anyone struggling with the anxiety and depression. It is cheap and effective. But you will love it more for its safety more than anything else. I took the supplement continuously for over five months and it cured my depression. I now take it from time to time to keep the depression at bay.

References:
https://www.serelax.com/
http://www.webhealthmagazine.com/serelax-reviews.html
https://www.beyondblue.org.au/the-facts/anxiety/treatments-for-anxiety
 How to Use Tea as a Remedy for the Symptoms of Menopause? tag:www.mombloggersclub.com,2015-10-12:988554:BlogPost:1649280 2015-10-12T12:16:40.000Z Evlin Symon http://www.mombloggersclub.com/profile/EvlinSymon

Is Tea a Remedy For Menopause?

Before hormone replacement therapy (HRT) was available for treatment of the different menopause symptoms, people only used herbs like teas. There are different teas that can address specific or all symptoms of menopause. There is an…

Is Tea a Remedy For Menopause?
Before hormone replacement therapy (HRT) was available for treatment of the different menopause symptoms, people only used herbs like teas. There are different teas that can address specific or all symptoms of menopause. There is an abundance of beneficial teas for the different symptoms. In this article, we will be taking a look at the most popular teas and discover the specific symptoms they can help treat.
Most herbs only need to be steeped in boiling water for about 5 to 10 minutes then taken one or more times daily to relieve menopause symptoms. In some cases, you can even use the herbs for cooking. Here are the top herbs that can be used for treating the discomforts of menopause.

Black Cohosh
This powerful herb has been used to relieve menopause symptoms for centuries. It is currently available in many forms including tablets/capsules and teas. Studies have shown that the herb offers estrogenic effects which help address the estorgen deficiency during menopause which is the main cause of the different symptoms of menopause. This herb is also a common remedy for fertility problems in women.

Ginseng
This is one of the most popular remedies for increasing energy level and improving vitality. There are different types of Asian ginseng that offer specific benefits and menopause supplement also available in the market like estrovera. Estrovera reviews are menopause product, Its improving the women health and symptoms of menopause like anxiety and mood swings The root is also available as a supplement but the tea version is the most popular for fighting fatigue especially during menopause. It also helps relieve the other menopause symptoms like mood swings and anxiety.

Mint
Aside from helping make your breath fresher, mint tea can also help ease menopause symptoms specifically painful symptoms like cramping. It also helps you relax and ease anxiety while at the same time helping prevent mood swings.

Ginger
This spice is an effective and safe remedy for different gastric issues like abdominal pain and cramping which are common menopause symptoms. Aside from using it in a tea, you can also use the spice for cooking and baking sweet treats like cookies.

Basil
Basil specifically relieves headaches and sore joints which are problematic symptoms of menopause. This herb is a potent pain reliever which is more effective when combined with thyme. The two can be used to create a powerful pain relieving tea.

What to Remember When Using Tea for Managing Menopause Symptoms?
There is no doubt that tea is an excellent remedy for easing menopause symptoms. However, you need to use it carefully especially use profemin and it's solving the women problems and like hot flashes and anxiety. It would be best to cool it and add some ice to prevent triggering hot flashes. Also remember that some teas contain caffeine which can also trigger hot flash episodes.

Other Treatments for Menopause Symptoms
Remember that tea can be used to ease menopause symptoms but most do not have an effect in fixing the main cause of the problem which is the hormonal imbalance that occurs during menopause. Here are the best treatments for ultimate menopause relief.

Lifestyle Changes
It is important to understand and accept the fact that your body is changing and so you have to make necessary changes to suit your current condition. Avoid caffeine and alcohol which can trigger menopause symptoms specifically hot flashes. Sleep at least 8 hours daily to make sure you are getting enough rest so that you can function optimally the following day.

Make sure you are getting the important vitamins and nutrients by eating natural, unprocessed foods like fruits and vegetables. It may be necessary to take a multivitamin and mineral supplement to support your different body functions. Also, remember to keep hydrated which can be very helpful in easing menopause symptoms like hot flashes.

Alternative Treatments
HRT is still the most effective treatment for the different menopause symptoms but it is not the safest. It is not an option for many women since it increases risk of heart disease and certain cancers. Alternative treatments like the use of tea to relieve menopause symptoms have become popular because of this particular reason. There are natural supplements designed to address the hormonal imbalance and supply the body with essential vitamins, minerals and other nutrients.

Most supplements for menopause contain phytoestrogens or plant estrogens which help make up for the deficiency of the hormone which is the actual cause of the different menopause symptoms. There are different herbs like black cohosh which have been shown to be effective in reducing certain menopause symptoms. There are also herbs that work to regulate the hormone production in the body which stimulate the production of certain hormones including estrogen and progesterone.

Conclusion
Tea can be used to relieve specific menopause symptoms. However, it is not very effective and in some cases doesn't work. The good news is that there are supplements for menopause relief that are more effective but still safe. You just need to be very careful in choosing one to make sure it is not only effective but safe as well.
 First Days of School: Behind the Scene Anxieties tag:www.mombloggersclub.com,2015-09-14:988554:BlogPost:1641699 2015-09-14T15:56:00.000Z Patricia Pazos http://www.mombloggersclub.com/profile/PatriciaPazos

Left image © …

Left image © Howard County Library System / Right image © Emran Kassim

We're just past the first week of school and we had a a pretty tough time with the transition. Last week I dropped off my eldest for his first day at school. Most of us fret that it's going to be a disaster, and sometimes it is. It definitely was for the little guy sitting at the edge of the mat on Day 1, literally kicking and screaming when it was time for the parents to leave the classroom. I'm happy that wasn't my situation on the first day, but a few days in, I've had to walk away and rip off the band-aid so-to-speak with an all-too-quick-for-my-liking good-bye.

On the third morning of school all was well until we stepped foot into the fenced kindergarten area. My little one immediately stepped behind me and hid. I pulled him around and crouched down to be face-to-face with him and that's when he threw his arms around my neck, buried his face in my shoulder and the tears began pouring. He's being so brave. He hasn't been without family for more than five minutes in the past four years. Everything has been about him in an absolutely love-filled bubble. And it all abruptly stopped. That's a huge change for anyone, never mind for an almost 4-year old. He's gone from a world that was all about him to one where he is one of many. From a very attached relationship with his grandmother and father to not knowing a soul in a massive room in a massive foreign building. I'd have some separation anxiety too.

 The sight of him on the other side of the chain-link fence, holding his little school bag, shoulders slumped, face in a full-out frown crying and looking around for me keeps replaying in my head. I know he just wanted to feel love in that moment and I couldn't do anything about it. I paid for that feeling all day. Tears would blur my vision as I typed away at my desk or I'd get choked up when someone asked how today went. And this is just the baby step in the separation stages that will take place over the years.

I don't know about you, but I feel that I wasn't completely sincere to myself and my child in my build-up towards this big day and the days that would follow. It's new, it's exciting and it's the unknown - for everyone involved. It's also a huge shift towards independence for your child, which is amazing, but it just happened so quickly that it's a bit of a shock. I can't be there to hug him when he's sad. I can't be there to tell him it's going to be okay when he's missing his family. I can't protect him from the kid that shoved him when they were in line. And I can't make sure that he's well-fed and has enough energy to take him through the day. At this moment, it doesn't matter to me that these are all the things that will help him face the world as he grows older. It doesn't matter that he's going to need to "toughen up and deal with things". All that matters is that I have absolutely no idea what goes on for over 6 hours during the day, he's not eating food and it absolutely breaks my heart when my barely out of toddler-hood child tells me that "sometimes I cried today and other times I didn't".

So what can you do? Here are 10 Tips to Help Your Child Adjust to School. For us, Day 1 was a breeze and Day 2 was a cinch too, but come Day 3, little man knew that crossing that fence meant being left at school for the day and he just needed to let it all out. It was also reassuring that there were a couple of super sweet kids in his classroom who came up to us while he sobbed on me and asked why he was sad and tried to make a connection with him - to which he wasn't very receptive. Understandable given the circumstances though. He'd been fighting back tears (according to one of the education assistants) for the past two days and on this morning, he just let it all out. I'm happy I was able to be there with him to hold him and let him know everything would be okay, but I knew that I would need to look into how I could give him tools to help him cope.

Here are a few things I'm trying / exploring to help the transition get smoother, faster:

(1) "The Kissing Hand" was recommended to me as a way to introduce the concept of separation and how parental love is ever-present even when we are physically not around. I'll be honest - it brought me to tears for the 78th time today, but it's a super sweet story, which my little man quite enjoyed and we will definitely try the kissing hand method for the next little while.
(2) From our chats about the first couple of school days, I picked up on the fact that my son enjoyed a prayer that his teacher said before lunchtime. I suggested that if he was feeling sad or missing anyone, he could reach out to Jesus and say a little prayer to help him be strong and to wipe the tears away.

 (3) I asked him if he'd like any of his toys - like his stuffed toy turtle (that he sleeps with) to join him in his school adventures. He said he does and so "Turty" will be joining him for comfort.

 (4) We're going to create a calendar of favourites. At the end of every day, I will ask him to think of his favourite thing of the day and we will put it on the calendar. And when he says he doesn't want to go to school, we can visit all the great things he's done in days, weeks or months that have passed.

Here are a few other helpful resources to help you and your child transition into school:

12 Ways to Help a Child Transition to Kindergarten

Here's a Pinterest board on Kindergarten Transition

How Can I Prepare my Child for Kindergarten?

8 Way to Ease Kindergarten Anxiety

Separation Anxiety: How to Handle First Day Fears

10 Crafts and Ideas to Curb Separation Anxiety

 Mini update: The Kissing Hand already seems to have made an impact as he came out of his bedroom after reading it to ask whether he had to put his hand on his cheek only. To which my MIL responded, "you can put it anywhere you like." It's incredible to see how quickly he's putting a coping tool to use. Seeing your child empowered is reassurance that you're doing a good job. Good luck to everyone with this massive transition - because it is huge.

 Please share if you have any suggestions for how to lessen fears and anxieties for school first-timers and their parents.
 The Anxiety of Having Too Much tag:www.mombloggersclub.com,2015-08-14:988554:BlogPost:1631215 2015-08-14T17:03:00.000Z P L http://www.mombloggersclub.com/profile/PL
Having too much stuff is a growing epidemic in our modern world. It is commonplace have houses, garages, attics, basements, and storage sheds bursting at the seams. Besides the enormous financial effects of owning all these things, what is it doing to our health?

I recently came across the book "Life At Home In The Twenty-First Century", which was the end result of a nine-year project by researchers at UCLA. This book examines what is really in our homes,…

Having too much stuff is a growing epidemic in our modern world. It is commonplace have houses, garages, attics, basements, and storage sheds bursting at the seams. Besides the enormous financial effects of owning all these things, what is it doing to our health?

I recently came across the book "Life At Home In The Twenty-First Century", which was the end result of a nine-year project by researchers at UCLA. This book examines what is really in our homes, and how we really live our lives. The results are staggering.

75% of households had garages packed so full that there was no space for the car. That means only one-quarter of people with garages actually use them for their intended purposes!

Clutter is greatly increased by our tendency to stockpile food and cleaning supplies, thanks to the popularity of bulk stores such as Costco and Sam's Club.

Americans invest major money in renovating and improving our yards and "master suites", yet the spaces go mostly unused.

Researchers tested the hormone levels of the participants, and found that dealing with the excess volume of possessions was such a serious problem that it actually elevated the levels of stress hormones in mothers.

The average American household is suffocating under the weight of endless clutter.

Stuff is oppressive. It weighs on us in an emotional way that often goes unnoticed, although the effects are very real. Clutter creates chaos in both our environment, and our minds. In some instances (more than one might expect) professional help is required to break the cycle of buying and spending...both in the form of financial counseling, and traditional therapy.

Simply seeing the chaos and disorder around us creates stress and increases anxiety.

Needing to constantly tidy and reorganize the clutter creates stress (and sucks time away from more leisurely activities that are necessary for mental health).

The cost of acquiring things creates unnecessary financial stress.

In recent articles found on WebMD (here and here), professionals have begun to link clutter with both anxiety and depression. They also note a positive change in energy levels and attitudes once people begin to let go and control their clutter. Anxiety disorders affect 40 million adults in the United States, and are the most common mental illness in the U.S. (Source: National Institute of Mental Health). Now obviously, anxiety disorders come in many forms, and I am certainly not suggesting that all mental illness can be cured by cleaning out your home. What I am suggesting is that, in an already stressed and chaotic life, minimizing the mountains of stuff we have may help to bring a little more peace into our lives. And peace is a good thing.

What do you think? Do you notice a change in your mood, based on the things in your environment?
 How Does A "Neat Freak" Deal With A Bathroom Remodel? tag:www.mombloggersclub.com,2015-06-02:988554:BlogPost:1607537 2015-06-02T16:15:00.000Z Ann Harrison http://www.mombloggersclub.com/profile/AnnHarrison

Ok.

Ooooo Kay.

In two days the bathroom remodel (that has been desperately needed for over 10 years) begins in full force. Our cast iron tub will be demolished with a sledgehammer, our old parquet floor will be torn up, cracked sink thrown in the dumpster and the walls will come a tumblin' down. I'm trying to focus on what the final product will be - not on the…

Ok.

Ooooo Kay.

In two days the bathroom remodel (that has been desperately needed for over 10 years) begins in full force. Our cast iron tub will be demolished with a sledgehammer, our old parquet floor will be torn up, cracked sink thrown in the dumpster and the walls will come a tumblin' down. I'm trying to focus on what the final product will be - not on the massive mess, noise, dust and inconvenience this is going to be.

Did I mention, we only have one bathroom? And... my husband and I both work from home.

Our tiny house has only one bathroom and it's demolition/remodel will cause a ruckus. How am I, a slight "neat freak", going to stay calm and deal with the impending mess and disruption that, we've been told, will go on for two weeks?

Pots of Tension Tamer tea? Blasting "Relaxation for Meditation" music? ("Relax! Now!!") Get a prescription for Valium?!

Have you had a remodel in your home? If so, how did you get through it with your nerves intact? Any advice/guidance is much appreciated.

 Something new to worry about: Passing along anxieties tag:www.mombloggersclub.com,2015-04-29:988554:BlogPost:1595669 2015-04-29T10:22:05.000Z Lauren Markman http://www.mombloggersclub.com/profile/LaurenMarkman
When I let my son watch Finding Nemo, I always start it at the scene where Nemo is waking his dad up for the first day of school. I know that fairy tales and children's movies have a long history of removing mothers from stories because moms represent safety and security. But in the case of Finding Nemo, I think that the opening scenes are a little too traumatic. My son…

When I let my son watch Finding Nemo, I always start it at the scene where Nemo is waking his dad up for the first day of school. I know that fairy tales and children's movies have a long history of removing mothers from stories because moms represent safety and security. But in the case of Finding Nemo, I think that the opening scenes are a little too traumatic. My son is perfectly able to understand that Marlin is an over-protective dad to Nemo without viewing the tragic origins.

 And, overall, Finding Nemo is a great story about adventure and friendship and growing up and being brave. But there is one thing that it really gets wrong: Anxiety-ridden parents don't produce brave, independent-thinking children; they produce anxiety-ridden children.

 Yes, I know that I am using a movie with talking sea creatures as an example. Go with it and let's focus on the important part.

 In a study by the Institute of Psychiatry, Psychology & Neuroscience at King's College London, researchers have found that overprotective parenting skills tend to make children feel more anxiety. By researching both twins and non-twins, researchers were able to determine that anxieties are more "contagious" than they are "genetic." How serious is this? Some children in the study were being treated for anxiety disorders by the time they reached age 11.

 How can parents help combat their overprotective natures? Here are a few tips:

Relax more. I wrote about this earlier in the week, and I know that it is easier said than done, but it really does help.

Let your child take age-appropriate risks. Maybe back off a bit from the playground and let them explore on their own, or at the very least, don't run over to your child every time they fall. They are probably fine (maybe just a little dirty).

Avoid your triggers. If you are one of those parents who always wants to talk about the latest news story about a child abduction several states away from where you live, then maybe you should stop watching so much news.

Seek out therapeutic exercises to help you control your own fears.

If know you'll be in a stressful situation (like if you are at a children's birthday party but don't like crowds), maybe pass that parenting chore off to your spouse or someone else in your family.

 I know that all this is easier said than done. But isn't it worth trying?

 Do you have any other tips for ways to keep your anxieties under control? Leave them for me in the comments.
 BULLYING AND THE WARNING SIGNS tag:www.mombloggersclub.com,2015-02-14:988554:BlogPost:1555083 2015-02-14T03:40:32.000Z MEGHA MATHUR http://www.mombloggersclub.com/profile/MEGHAMATHUR
Parents love their children from the time they are conceived. Anything that causes a child pain, causes them pain. Unfortunately, bullying across schools has increased and has taken a new form – cyberbullying. Here are some recent statistics on bullying from bullyingstatistics.org:

About 35% of children have been bullied online.

58% have children and teens have reported that something mean was said to them.

77% students when surveyed indicated that they were…

Parents love their children from the time they are conceived. Anything that causes a child pain, causes them pain. Unfortunately, bullying across schools has increased and has taken a new form – cyberbullying. Here are some recent statistics on bullying from bullyingstatistics.org:

About 35% of children have been bullied online.

58% have children and teens have reported that something mean was said to them.

77% students when surveyed indicated that they were victim to one form of bullying or another.

This post is to help parents advocate for their children. Parents are often the first-line defences children have and one key thing I always recommend to parents is to LISTEN and SEE. Don't ignore what your child is trying to communicate to you either verbally or non-verbally.

If you believe your CHILD IS GETTING BULLIED, look for these key signs:

Your child has become quieter. This indicates that something is happening in his/her environment and is not comfortable talking about it.

Things are mysteriously disappearing from his/her backpack. Instead of asking them directly, ask them indirectly. For example, "I remember that last week you had bought a new pair of earphones, I cannot see them anywhere. Do you know where they are, did someone take them?" Pay close attention to the last part of the sentence. It is an indication to your child that you suspect something and are open to listening.

They refuse to go on the school bus. This can be considered as the first indicator to parents that something is wrong. School buses are often the first places that your child can get bullied.

You suddenly notice that your child is nervous to go to school and is 'clingy' depending on the age of your child. Younger children between the ages of 4-8 years could demonstrate this behaviour.

They try to stay home as much as they can and will start to fake illnesses.

If you see bruises or scrapes on your children, it is time to pay attention. Don't let them sway you into thinking that it was 'just a onetime thing'. Ask pointed questions and get straight answers.

If your child is comes back hungry from school. This is an indication that his/her lunch is being eaten by someone else or their lunch money is getting stolen.

Bullying can cause your child's self-esteem to plummet. Constantly hearing negative talk causes them to start believing that they are not 'worth it'. Pay attention to any negative self-talk in your child such as "I am not good enough" or "I need to lose weight"

Here are some tips if you suspect YOUR CHILD IS THE BULLY:

This is the toughest thing for parents to admit- that their child is a bully and is hurting someone else. It is essential that parents acknowledge this problem. They need to realize that their child needs help in order to lead a positive, empathetic, fulfilling life.

If you notice aggressive behaviour at home. This indicates that the same behaviour is going to be replicated at school.

You notice that your child is hanging out with a different set of friends that you don't approve of.

You are suddenly being called to the school more because your child was causing trouble.

The best way to make sure that your child is not getting bullied or is the bully is to always tell them that they are good as they are. They need to have a strong sense of self in order to withstand peer pressure or become a victim.

originally posted on www.meghamathur.com
 SWEET TANGERINE POSITIVE ENERGY TEA BY YOGI TEA THE SWEETEST PART OF MY DAY tag:www.mombloggersclub.com,2014-10-04:988554:BlogPost:1524047 2014-10-04T23:47:54.000Z Hope Brissette http://www.mombloggersclub.com/profile/HopeBrissette

picture courtesy of no wheat no dairy no coffee

When I was 16 I worked at my very first job. I ran a small coffee shop in my neighborhood. All day I made and drank coffee. I was a full fledged coffeeaholic from that summer…

picture courtesy of no wheat no dairy no coffee

When I was 16 I worked at my very first job. I ran a small coffee shop in my neighborhood. All day I made and drank coffee. I was a full fledged coffeeaholic from that summer forward.

Every morning the first thing on my mind was "COFFFFFFEEEE" nothing else mattered until I got that brown liquid down my throat. Mostly because I knew if I didn't that the headache would set in. Not to mention I just could not think or focus with out it. The only exception was when I got pregnant and that was only because the smell of it made me want to instantly loose my lunch.

So you can surely imagine that when I started my juice cleanse in July, I had absolutely no intention of getting off of coffee.

Read more Mama's Crazy Happy Life

 Do you like number one or number two? tag:www.mombloggersclub.com,2014-09-24:988554:BlogPost:1521680 2014-09-24T10:31:58.000Z Lauren Markman http://www.mombloggersclub.com/profile/LaurenMarkman
I recently went for my annual eye exam. My vision is poor, even without all that blue light at night, so I try to be as good to my eyes as possible. I have a good rapport with my eye doctor; she is amazingly gentle with the battery of vision and pressure tests and she understands why I giggle during the main vision test (thanks,…

I recently went for my annual eye exam. My vision is poor, even without all that blue light at night, so I try to be as good to my eyes as possible. I have a good rapport with my eye doctor; she is amazingly gentle with the battery of vision and pressure tests and she understands why I giggle during the main vision test (thanks, Brian Regan).

 But let's talk about that vision test for a moment. I like it: It's simple: Do you like number one or number two? That's it. Two choices. And I take a lot of comfort from that.

You see, there is a breadth of research available on how having too many choices can make you miserable. The research on this is intriguing: We are always second-guessing ourselves, hoping that we didn't miss out on a better choice than the one we picked. There is so much anxiety around the decision-making between two good choices, that it can make people miserable.

 And this is what I try to keep in mind when I give my son a choice. Asking a four-year-old to choose between two really excellent options causes anxiety, the same as it does in adults. Granted, I don't want to make decisions for him by giving him an "obvious" choice and a "awful" choice, but it is something to keep in mind. This is why I am less likely to give him more than two choices at a time (do you want to go home and build with Legos or do you want to look at Halloween costumes at the store?) I'm trying to allow him to make decisions in his life without overwhelming him.

 And I think he is picking up on this, because I see the same behavior from him when he plays. When he wants my attention, he'll give me a choice: Do I want to watch the monster truck show or help him build a pirate ship? And I make the choice and we are both happy. (Even though I sometimes still wonder if the other choice was secretly better.)

 How many decisions a day do you muddle over after making them? Share the pain with me in the comments.
 Are You Stressing Your Kids Out? tag:www.mombloggersclub.com,2014-03-21:988554:BlogPost:1492203 2014-03-21T11:58:08.000Z Whitney Fleming http://www.mombloggersclub.com/profile/WhitneyFleming
This content originally appeared on www.playdatesonfridays.com.

Two travel soccer leagues, piano, gymnastics, horseback, theater and various school activities. And sometimes a lacrosse clinic. Or basketball. Or we may take a cooking class some place.

Sometimes when I write it all down, it freaks me out a bit, and I ask myself, "Are we doing too much? Do my kids have enough time to play, or breathe?"

And then I…

This content originally appeared on www.playdatesonfridays.com.

Two travel soccer leagues, piano, gymnastics, horseback, theater and various school activities. And sometimes a lacrosse clinic. Or basketball. Or we may take a cooking class some place.

Sometimes when I write it all down, it freaks me out a bit, and I ask myself, "Are we doing too much? Do my kids have enough time to play, or breathe?"

And then I forget about it because I haven't washed a uniform and we have a game the next morning, or I need to order new riding pants, or I have to pick up the next set of piano books.

When our kids are little, it's easy to put them in a lot of activities because the commitment level is low. Games are just once a week and local, or a session of a class may only be a few weeks long. However, as your child gets older, the intensity and time commitment needed to participate grows exponentially alongside the pressure to have a multitude of extracurricular activities to list on college applications.

For example, in our house travel soccer is year round without breaks. Games can be as early as 6:15 a.m. and practices are two to three times a week. My friends that do competitive cheerleading and hockey spend their weekends traveling across the country for their competitions. Marching bands practice all of August and then take trips to Disney or even Europe. I even had a friend's daughter that went to a state competition for her high school's Speech team. The group practiced for two hours four days a week for a month. It's all pretty intense.

But how do we know if we are enriching our kids' lives, or just plain stressing them out?

The Chicago Tribune discussed this issue earlier this year. In the article, Tiffany Sanders, a certified adult and school psychologist, talks about how too many activities can overwhelm a child, leading to a host of other disorders, such as anxiety or ADD.

"Some parents need to ask themselves, 'Is this what my child wants to do, or is it something I always wanted (him or her) to do?'" Sanders said. "There are some parents who believe that 'this is going to get us our next big break' or that their child is going to be a star athlete. And most kids will do what they can to please their parents."

Sanders said it can be especially difficult for younger children because they might not know how to express feeling overwhelmed. She said a common indicator in younger children is when they often complain about feeling sick before going to particular activities.

On the other hand, older children and teenagers may not speak up because they feel they are obligated to be overachievers like their parents, Sanders said. (source: "Are kids involved in too many activities? – Chicago Tribune. http://articles.chicagotribune.com/2014-01-01/news/ct-x-over-scheduled-kids-0101-20140101_1_helicopter-parents-activities-kids.)

If you are enrolling your kids in activities just to keep them from sitting around or because you think they may miss out on something that other kids are doing, you may want to just talk to your kids about it to see how they feel. Ask yourself: Is your child already doing something they love, but you think sitting idle two days a week is a waste? Are you making your child play a sport just because you never were able to fulfill your dream of playing varsity football? Did your two year old learn how to swim and you see a future Olympian?

This is a tough one for me. I am a joiner. I love to be busy and have always looked at these activities as an opportunity to be social. Two of my daughters are the same and have never met an activity that they didn't love. The third, not so much.

We decided to reduce the amount of extracurricular activities for her to two that only meet once a week (unless you count performances or competitions, which aren't often.) One had to be a "sport" because we think fitness is important (horseback riding….I know, it's a tough life for her), and another one had to be creative (theater.) She could choose what she wanted to participate in, as long as it was accessible and affordable. Although it was heartbreaking to me, she elected to not partake in piano lessons anymore.

At the end of the day, I had to realize that it was my dream to have all my girls play the piano, something I always wanted to learn, but never did. But it certainly wasn't my daughter's dream, and I think we're all a little happier now that we don't have to fight about practicing.

And sometimes I just have to say no. My youngest begged me to take gymnastics, but I just didn't think we could handle it last year. We were completely over-scheduled and when some carpools fell through, I did not feel like it would fit. Fortunately, our soccer schedules this year are more flexible, so I signed her up, and she's loving it. I don't think you'll see her at the Olympics, but I'm happy that she's enjoying it — for now.

For me, it's about understanding each individual kid, and then understanding how that fits what's best for our family. As my girls get older, I envision cutting our activities back to two each maximum. Between my husband's hectic work schedule, the academic demands of school, and the growing travel commitments of competitive sports, I think any more than that would break us as a family. Although I love watching my kids tear it up on the soccer field or perform well in a play more than anyone, I like spending quality time with my husband and kids more, and think it's critical to keeping our family unit solid.

Even more importantly, I don't want my kids to do things just to be busy. As a parent, my job is to help them find their passions and develop a sense of character that will help them succeed in life. I think sports, music and other activities can bring a lot of joy and life lessons to a child; however, I also think kids need time just to be. Time to play with their friends, watch a movie, or just relax in whatever way they choose. Since scaling back on activities, my one daughter now reads a lot more (albeit due to the fact that we are often at the soccer fields or her sisters' piano lessons, but she's reading) or plays with other kids waiting for their siblings. She definitely needs more downtime, and I'm glad we were able to recognize that early on before school became more challenging for her.

As parents, I think we all know how it feels to be pulled in a million different directions — to feel over scheduled and too busy to do anything well. While I think (some of us) adults are emotionally equipped to deal with that pressure, it is crazy to think that tweens and teens can handle those same demands.

Yes, some kids thrive in situations like these. They can be elite students, president of the student body and an award-winning athlete. But for most, it's a little much.

And honestly, it's a little too much for me, as well. I have three kids roughly the same age, so a multitude of activities it's just the price we pay as a family. Even two activities per child equal out to about 10-12 runs in the minivan per week. But I don't feel too over-scheduled just yet.

Ask me again in a few more years….

Are you concerned your child may be too busy? Here is a great article from Kids Health on signs your kid may be over scheduled and suggestions for a busy family. I would also love to hear how you deal with this issue? Please share your comments below!
 When Too Much Is Too Much tag:www.mombloggersclub.com,2014-03-14:988554:BlogPost:1490954 2014-03-14T16:30:00.000Z Ann Harrison http://www.mombloggersclub.com/profile/AnnHarrison

I started to let my anxiety and low self-esteem take over my mind this morning. I really didn't want to feel that way so I fought to keep these emotions at bay and I fought hard. It's been 3 hours now and, so far so good. What did I do? Let's see...

I…

I started to let my anxiety and low self-esteem take over my mind this morning. I really didn't want to feel that way so I fought to keep these emotions at bay and I fought hard. It's been 3 hours now and, so far so good. What did I do? Let's see...

I forced myself to smile. Sometimes it turned into a slight grin, but a smile is what it was.

Recently it came to my attention that I am the heaviest I've ever been (not counting pregnancies) and although I never-want-to-eat-again! I made myself one scrambled egg, added a dash of cayenne pepper (it helps speed metabolism), a couple of spoonfuls of salsa and topped it with shredded kale. Some protein, a healthy veggie = my stomach is full and my mind is at peace, no guilt.

Our financial situation will be changing in April - many things "up in the air" - and there is no way for me to predict how things will go. (None of us really can with absolute certainty regarding the future, can we?) I cannot panic. I search for work (meaning = get paid with money, not product) I can do through social media and do my best to financially contribute to the household.

Taking a break from searching for paying work through social media I connected with a few of my blog buddies that make me smile. Also, checked out Pinterest under the "humor" category, always good for a laugh!

Stuck to my plan of doing some kind of exercise everyday and put forth strong effort with a few fitness instructors through OnDemand. Oh my gosh I'm so out of shape!! But the only way to remedy that is to get moving again, right?

Through these steps I've held my sadness and anxiety at bay. Some days I have way too much of these emotions and I hate it. Every day takes effort, you choose which direction. Every day there is a way to find a bit of joy, something to make you laugh, a way to connect to the positive that's around us.

Have you been feeling overwhelmed? Is low self-esteem, or fear, creeping in? What do you do to stay positive and/or productive?

I would love it if you would join me at - AnnAgainandagain.com
 School Avoidance (Part 2 of 2) tag:www.mombloggersclub.com,2013-12-13:988554:BlogPost:1471991 2013-12-13T17:06:04.000Z Stacy Hladek http://www.mombloggersclub.com/profile/SarahSenst
As I mentioned in my previous blog, we have had an increase in calls to our Family Support Line related to children refusing to go to school. If you did not read the previous blog, it would be a good place to start regarding general information on heading off school avoidance in children.

What is school avoidance? The website, Human Illnesses, defined school avoidance as "when children and teens repeatedly stay home from school or are repeatedly sent home from school, because of…

As I mentioned in my previous blog, we have had an increase in calls to our Family Support Line related to children refusing to go to school. If you did not read the previous blog, it would be a good place to start regarding general information on heading off school avoidance in children.

What is school avoidance? The website, Human Illnesses, defined school avoidance as "when children and teens repeatedly stay home from school or are repeatedly sent home from school, because of emotional problems or because of aches and pains that are caused by emotions or stress and not by medical illness". School avoidance, also referred to as school phobia or school refusal, occurs in approximately 2-5% of school age children. It is most common in 5-6 year olds and 10-11 year olds.

Typical behaviors for a child or teen that has school avoidance is for them to come up with reasons not to go to school, to complain of physical symptoms shortly before it is time to go to school, or to make repeated visits to the school nurse or counselor once at school, with similar physical complaints. Often the complaints are vague or non-specific. In more severe cases, such as school phobia, common physical complaints are aches and pains, headaches, stomach concerns, muscle tension, and dizziness. In the most severe case of anxiety, students may complain of difficulty breathing and tightening in the chest, which can be an indicator of a panic attack. The symptoms typically disappear once the child is allowed to go home and during the weekends or over school breaks. In addition, when the physical complaints are evaluated by a doctor, there is no medical cause found.

It should be noted that when children and teens complain of physical complaints it should always be assumed that the complaints are legitimate and a medical appointment should be completed to rule out medical issues. In some severe cases of anxiety, people can develop ulcers and other health issues that should be addressed medically. It is also important to note, that even if there is no medical problem, the physical complaints are not fake. The child likely is experience physical discomfort due to emotional distress.

Other symptoms that can develop in children with school avoidance is an increase in tantrums or tantrums that are not age-appropriate, separation anxiety, defiance, and in some cases other mental health concerns such as depression and obsessive behaviors.

I often hear parents say that if it weren't for the school avoidance they would not have any problems with their child. They state that other than the avoidance the child follows the rules and does not cause problems in the home. Most children with school avoidance are of average to above average intelligence. They are often the children that were quiet and shy in school, but were well liked by adults due to the fact that they were not a disturbance in class and would do what they were told to do.

Why do children/teens develop school avoidance? Most parents' initial response is to assume that there is an issue at school. This may be the case, especially if there is bullying, conflict with a peer or teacher, existing learning disabilities, or fear of failure. However, often times the avoidance has less to do with the school setting and more to do with the child's coping skills and/or home environment.

In young children, the school avoidance can be due to fact that they are having some separation anxiety from parents and familiar environment. With young children they are being introduced to a variety of new challenges, new people, and new environments. In young children the avoidance may be related to concerns regarding potty training and/or using the bathroom in public.
Children of all ages, including teens, can develop avoidance behaviors when there is a major transition, such as change in the family structure (new siblings, older siblings moving out, separation/divorce, remarriage, military deployment, etc.), moves, or new schools. Often the avoidance will appear when a student is moving from elementary school to middle school or from middle school to high school.

It is also important to remember that the adult's emotional stability can also be a factor. If parent is stressed or depressed the children may pick up on this. Children will often have avoidance behaviors if a family member has a serious illness as they are afraid something will happen to the loved one while they are away from the home. This may also occur after a loved one dies. The child may feel that they have to stay at home or someone else might die. If there is domestic violence or substance abuse in the home the child may also feel that they need to be home to protect other family members or to help "keep the peace".

What can the adults do to help? First, the adults need to find out what the underlying reason for the avoidance is. Sometimes the child does not even know the underlying reason and needs help from the adults to figure this out. Once the reason is determined then the adults can help the child to work on a plan to address the anxiety/fear of going to school. It is very important to not allow the child to avoid school. As with all types of anxiety, avoidance causes the problem to become worse, not better. The longer a child is out of school, the harder it is to return. A student may need to ease back into school, but they should be going at least a short time every day to start and the time should increase as the days or weeks go by. Parents can enlist the help of the school to work out a plan for easing a child back into school. Other professionals who can assist in the plan are the child's pediatrician and/or mental health professionals.

Adults should not shame the child or make fun of the child for not attending school. Adults can talk with the student on a regular basis about their feelings and fears as this helps to reduce the fears and stress. Do not punish the child for avoiding school, but do not inadvertently reward them either. If the child refuses school and the parent cannot get them there safely, the child should not be allowed to engage in fun activities while at home for the day. There should be no television, video games, or special treats. The home environment should be made to be as boring as possible so that it does not reinforce the child's desire to stay home.

For more suggestions on ways to address school avoidance, additional ways to support your family and for other great parenting tips call the Family Support Line at 1-800-CHILDREN (800-244-5373) OR 1-866-Las-Familias (866-527-3264) for Spanish speakers. You can also e-mail email@example.com with questions or concerns. Check us out on Facebook at Families First Colorado. The Family Support Line offers parenting tips, resources and information only and does not serve as legal or mental health advice. We believe you are the paramount person to decide what is best for your family. Comments provided by non-Families First individuals are not the opinion of Families First.
 Make New Friends But Keep The Old? tag:www.mombloggersclub.com,2013-12-03:988554:BlogPost:1469594 2013-12-03T03:29:24.000Z Janice Perry http://www.mombloggersclub.com/profile/JanicePerry

 I cannot be the only one...who has suspected that their long time friendships may have turned into something other than actual friendships over the many, many years that we have known each other. This is something I have been thinking about for…

I cannot be the only one...who has suspected that their long time friendships may have turned into something other than actual friendships over the many, many years that we have known each other. This is something I have been thinking about for awhile, after our invites to our old friend's kids birthday parties have been "lost in the mail" or seeing pictures of our group of friends at a dinner parties we were not a part of showing up on Facebook, but the thought became a definite realization over this past weekend when we spent time with the New Friends.

While drinking red wine, chatting about annoying child behaviors, and watching my son having a great time in the living room of a newly acquired friend, I began to think how much better this social setting feels than the ones we have been a part of recently. These new friends flung the doors of their home wide open to welcome family members, old friends, and new acquaintances in an effort to build a bridge between us all (while generously offering cocktails to loosen up the awkwardness that tends to tighten everyone up around newbies). This all are welcome environment is in stark contrast to our friends we have known since the Jurassic period, who preferred to keep the group of compadres small and tended to entertain by category (old friends, work friends, family, etc.). I started to realize that a lot of my social anxiety may have been spawned by our old friends rules of engagement...to read the rest of my new friend vs. old friend woes, please visit my blog here: I Cannot Be The Only One...
 School Avoidance (Part 1 of 2) tag:www.mombloggersclub.com,2013-11-25:988554:BlogPost:1468340 2013-11-25T23:00:00.000Z Stacy Hladek http://www.mombloggersclub.com/profile/SarahSenst
We have had three calls to our Family Support Line in the last month related to children refusing to go to school. It occurred to me that this might be a good topic to address in the blog. In the twenty years that I have been working with children and families, I have noticed that school avoidance seems to rise around the holidays. I believe there are a few reasons for the peak in school avoidance around this time of year. The first is that the semester is finishing up and the stress…

We have had three calls to our Family Support Line in the last month related to children refusing to go to school. It occurred to me that this might be a good topic to address in the blog. In the twenty years that I have been working with children and families, I have noticed that school avoidance seems to rise around the holidays. I believe there are a few reasons for the peak in school avoidance around this time of year. The first is that the semester is finishing up and the stress increase due to projects and tests that are due. Midterms and finals can be very stressful for students of all ages. The holidays also tend to bring out stress in most adults and children pick up on our stress levels. Another reason that school avoidance seems to be up this time of year is due to the school breaks. It can be especially difficult for a student that has anxiety around school to return after they have had a break for the holidays.

Be proactive and implement some of the following strategies to try to head off the possibility that your child will develop school avoidance over the holidays:

- Take good care of yourself and do what you can to make the holidays as stress-free as possible. I know, "easier said than done". But if you start planning now to try to decrease stress, even a bit that will be beneficial for you whole family.

- Use the holidays as a time to practice self-care and coping skills as a family.

- Make sure that you remind your child several times, if not daily, during the break that they will be returning to school after the break. A good way to do this for younger children is to have a calendar or countdown for when school will start back up. Also reminding them that parents have to return to work can be helpful.

- Talk about all the positives about school. For example, friends, recess, lunch, and whatever subject your child enjoys the most. Remind them of the adult(s) they look up to the most.

- Remind your child of their future goals and how important school is to reaching those goals.

- Remind your child of all the successes they have had in school to this point.

- Help children that tend to be perfectionist or have a hard time with failure, by reminding them we all have things that we do well and we all have areas we need extra work in. Point out some of your own strengths and weaknesses. Let them know they do not have to be perfect or do everything well.

- Talk to your child about their feelings regarding school. This is a good habit to get into not just during the holidays, but on a routine basis.

- Make the first day back after holidays as special as you did the first day of school. Maybe the child can wear a new or favorite outfit to school. Offer a reward at the end of the school day, such as going to get ice cream or letting them suggest dinner and help prepare it.

If you believe your child is already experiencing school avoidance, be sure to catch the second part of this article in the next blog.

For more suggestions on ways to make the holidays less stressful, reduce the chance of school avoidance, additional ways to support your family and for other great parenting tips call the Family Support Line at 1-800-CHILDREN (800-244-5373) OR 1-866-Las-Familias (866-527-3264) for Spanish speakers. You can also e-mail email@example.com with questions or concerns. Check us out on Facebook at Families First Colorado. The Family Support Line offers parenting tips, resources and information only and does not serve as legal or mental health advice. We believe you are the paramount person to decide what is best for your family. Comments provided by non-Families First individuals are not the opinion of Families First.
 Is your child a Nervous Nelly when it's time for a visit to the doctor? tag:www.mombloggersclub.com,2013-07-24:988554:BlogPost:1427664 2013-07-24T18:00:19.000Z Stacy Hladek http://www.mombloggersclub.com/profile/SarahSenst
Here are some helpful tips thanks to Mountainland Pediatrics:

Talk about doctor visits in a positive way. Read fun books to your child about doctor visits prior to your appointment.

If your child asks if the shot or procedure will hurt, don't fib about it; get down at your child's eye-level and explain that the shot may hurt a little for a few seconds.

 Allow your child some control regarding the appointment. Let them choose which toy they want to bring with…

Here are some helpful tips thanks to Mountainland Pediatrics:

Talk about doctor visits in a positive way. Read fun books to your child about doctor visits prior to your appointment.

If your child asks if the shot or procedure will hurt, don't fib about it; get down at your child's eye-level and explain that the shot may hurt a little for a few seconds.

 Allow your child some control regarding the appointment. Let them choose which toy they want to bring with them, and how they want to sit for the shot.

 Distraction is helpful during the shot or procedure, such as

 Playing "I spy" and helping your child find items in the room.

Blowing bubbles during the shot (this also helps the child to regulate breathing and remain calm).

Tell your child to blow out the pain like a candle or have the child squeeze your hand as hard as the pain is of the shot.

Plan a special reward for after the shots (i.e. going to get ice cream, going to the park, visiting a grandparent/relative, etc.).

Allow the child to calm down before leaving the doctor's office so that they can leave on a positive note and not associate the doctor's office with negative things or pain.

Children sense parents' anxiety. Make sure you're able to stay calm during the procedures.

 Mountainland Pediatrics

8889 Fox Dr. - Thornton, CO 80260

303.430.0823

www.MountainlandPeds.org

 A few additional tips from Families First:

Remind your child of other doctor's trips or events that are similar they had success with in the past.

Empathize with your child. You can say something like, "I don't like going to the doctor either, but we have to go so we can stay healthy and grow up strong".

Similar to Moutainland's last tip, consider if siblings are going to cause an increase in anxiety. It may be that your children do better when together. Take time to consider if this is the case or if it may be better to have siblings go to appointments at different times or to have them go back to the office one at a time.

Brag to others (grandparents, older siblings, parent that didn't attend, friends, etc.) in front of your child about how brave they were at the doctor's office.

Do not discipline or make negative comments about crying or other emotional responses. Instead, validate their feelings by reflect the child's emotions back to them. For example, "You were really afraid, but you got through it." or "That must have hurt, but you were able to settle yourself down quickly."

For more suggestions on ways to ease your child's anxiety around doctor visits or other situation, additional ways to support your family and for other great parenting tips call the Family Support Line at 1-800-CHILDREN (800-244-5373) OR 1-866-Las-Familias (866-527-3264) for Spanish speakers. You can also e-mail email@example.com with questions or concerns. Check us out on Facebook at Families First Colorado. The Family Support Line offers parenting tips, resources and information only and does not serve as legal or mental health advice. We believe you are the paramount person to decide what is best for your family. Comments provided by non-Families First individuals are not the opinion of Families First.
 Preventing or Decreasing Long-term Problems in Children tag:www.mombloggersclub.com,2013-05-23:988554:BlogPost:1374755 2013-05-23T19:00:00.000Z Stacy Hladek http://www.mombloggersclub.com/profile/SarahSenst
Parents/primary caregivers are the most important advocate for their children in all areas of their development, including social-emotional. May is Mental Health Awareness month. Children as young as newborns can have social-emotional issues. Research shows, behavior problems that surface in early childhood are the single best predictor for several long-term outcomes, such as adolescent delinquency, gang involvement, incarceration, substance abuse, divorce, unemployment (Center for…

Parents/primary caregivers are the most important advocate for their children in all areas of their development, including social-emotional. May is Mental Health Awareness month. Children as young as newborns can have social-emotional issues. Research shows, behavior problems that surface in early childhood are the single best predictor for several long-term outcomes, such as adolescent delinquency, gang involvement, incarceration, substance abuse, divorce, unemployment (Center for Evidence-Based Practice: Young Children with Challenging Behaviors, 2004). The good news is that there are many preventative and early intervention programs available to help head off mental health issues in young children or to help lessen the intensity of the problems a child may experience.

The following are some red flags that may indicate that a child could benefit from an assessment. It should be noted that one or two red flags alone does not necessarily mean a child is having a mental health issue, but it does mean further observation, discussion, and evaluation may be indicated.

- Developmental concerns.

- Not giving eye contact with primary caregiver(s).

- Over or under reactivity to pain.

- Does not allowing soothing from primary caregivers when hurt or upset. Does not engage in self-soothing - Has problems with affection, becomes rigid when picked up/cuddled/touched or turns head away whebn being feed. Does not initiate affection with those close to them.

- Overly friendly with strangers.

- Ongoing sleep and/or feeding issues.

- Acting out behaviors such as, fire setting, excessive lying, or stealing. Routinely tantrums or rages for more than 15 minutes for no apparent reason.

- Intentional cruelty to animals or younger/weaker children.

- Development of nervous or anxious behaviors that persist, including being easily startled or frightened. Or routinely crying for 15 or minutes after separated from primary caregiver.

- Play issues, such as withdraw or avoids playing with other children. Lack of explorative behaviors/play.

- Repetitive behaviors

If you are seeing any of these signs or symptoms in your children, regardless of how young they are please talk to your child's health care provider or your local mental health center. You can also call 1-800-Children, where we can help direct you to other resources and support.

For additional ways to support your family and for other great parenting tips call the Family Support Line at 1-800-CHILDREN (800-244-5373) OR 1-866-Las-Familias (866-527-3264) for Spanish speakers. You can also e-mail email@example.com with questions or concerns. The Family Support Line offers parenting tips, resources and information only and does not serve as legal or mental health advice. We believe you are the paramount person to decide what is best for your family. Comments provided by non-Families First individuals are not the opinion of Families First.
 Confessions of an Anxious Mom tag:www.mombloggersclub.com,2013-05-22:988554:BlogPost:1374175 2013-05-22T03:05:02.000Z Shawna http://www.mombloggersclub.com/profile/ShawnaLee
This is my first guest post, I'd love to hear what you all think! Post is at Tell Another Mom

- Shawna

Dovetail Blog

This is my first guest post, I'd love to hear what you all think! Post is at Tell Another Mom

- Shawna

Dovetail Blog
 Depression tag:www.mombloggersclub.com,2013-02-19:988554:BlogPost:1343838 2013-02-19T19:45:28.000Z KayK http://www.mombloggersclub.com/profile/KayK
I feel like I'm drowning I hate feeling depressed especially when it seems it will never end. This is such a hard issue that I have had to deal with for so many years. I really hate talking about these things with anyone because I just want everyone to think I'm normal. The problem is I don't feel normal and this is something that I have wished for. Even now I'm finding out hard to write about this.

I'm just going to list my problems below…

I feel like I'm drowning I hate feeling depressed especially when it seems it will never end. This is such a hard issue that I have had to deal with for so many years. I really hate talking about these things with anyone because I just want everyone to think I'm normal. The problem is I don't feel normal and this is something that I have wished for. Even now I'm finding out hard to write about this.

I'm just going to list my problems below

Depression
 Anxiety
 OCD
 Restless Leg
 Fibromyalgia
 IBS

These issues cause anger, pain, more pain, sleep probs, fear, sadness, strange compulsions, just to name a few. I've had to choose which meds are worth taking as side effects can be worse than the prob you are taking them for. Sometimes I get to the point that I wonder why I even try.

I suppose if I stick it out then I can be sure I won't have to redo this life over in reincarnation.
 Irrational Fears tag:www.mombloggersclub.com,2013-01-31:988554:BlogPost:1338110 2013-01-31T20:03:06.000Z Lisa Caldwell http://www.mombloggersclub.com/profile/LisaCaldwell

Does this look like something nightmarish? Bad example?

© Juburg | Stock Free Images…

Does this look like something nightmarish? Bad example?

© Juburg | Stock Free Images & Dreamstime Stock Photos

This morning when I was driving to work, I looked in my rearview mirror and saw a guy on a motorcycle. He was wearing a Skeletor mask.

My first reaction was, "Is he the Angel of Death? Am I going to die today?"

How did I even get there? Shouldn't my initial reaction be, "Only in Austin will you see a guy on a motorcycle wearing a Skeletor mask. I wonder which of my co-workers knows him."

I have weird fears. My mind will just "go there" when confronted something strange.

L.E. sat on my chest one time and put her hands on my neck to give me a hug. I immediately mistook it as her trying to strangle me and she is going to end up a serial killer.

I assure you nothing traumatic happened in my childhood to give me this bizarre paranoia.

Except for the clown.

When I was four, we were at some Halloween party at a big restaurant. I was dressed as a princess. I asked my mom if I could go to the bathroom by myself. She said sure. When I was coming back, someone tapped my shoulder. I turned around and there was a werewolf and a clown. The werewolf was the most terrifying thing I'd ever seen. The clown was guilty by association. My screams were so loud that they almost put the restaurant on lockdown because people assumed I was being abducted.

Ever since then, I'm scared of clowns. All types...Ronald McDonald, Bimbo, Killer Klowns, clown dolls, Jack-in-the-Boxes, etc.

Seeing Poltergeist at age 7 may have contributed to this.

So yes, I have an irrational fear of clowns. And I always assume the worst is going to happen even when it's just a dude dressed as Skeletor. On a motorcycle. In January...

I can't be the only one with a strange fear. Please tell me:

What are your crazy, irrational fears?

 Happy Blogoversary To Me!! tag:www.mombloggersclub.com,2013-01-24:988554:BlogPost:1340851 2013-01-24T21:30:00.000Z Tracey M. http://www.mombloggersclub.com/profile/musings

I can't believe today is my 3-year blogging anniversary! I am amazed at all the Lord has brought me through from the time I started…

I can't believe today is my 3-year blogging anniversary! I am amazed at all the Lord has brought me through from the time I started this journey until now. This blog began as a sort of therapy as I emerged from what was an 18-month journey from the depths of postpartum depression, anxiety, and (at the beginning) psychosis which included two hospitalizations. I truly have so much for which to be thankful!

This blog was my therapy on my journey to being a healthy mom for this little guy. I never even knew what a blog was until after reaching out and joining a MOPS group one of the moms sent me a link to hers, Neener Girl and Family. Thank you Renee! My blog started out as a daily journal to chronicle my victories, and it evolved from there.

Here I am in the beginning of my 18-mo. postpartum "sickness" journey;

I can remember distinctly the depths of despair I was feeling with the overwhelming

 thought that there was no way I could capably raise this child.

And in this picture, finally emerging from it victoriously, and experiencing some of the first true joys of motherhood as I took my then 20-mo-old on his first sledding excursion.

 And here is the now 4-1/2-yr-old face of this sweet little boy

that is the greatest gift the Lord has ever bestowed upon me.

Boo at the Zoo 2012 with my little SuperHero

I am so thankful for all of you who stop here. You have blessed me in more ways than you know!

As always,
Thank you for visiting!

http://musingsofthemonroefamily.blogspot.com
 Ready...Set...WORRY tag:www.mombloggersclub.com,2013-01-18:988554:BlogPost:1333151 2013-01-18T00:53:01.000Z Sarah http://www.mombloggersclub.com/profile/SarahFox
When I found out I was pregnant with Conor I was single, young, and pretty stupid. When I told the ex-boyfriend the situation he quickly skipped town around the time I was 6 weeks along. I never heard from him again. I had to grow up and get my shit together fast, but in all honesty it wasn't that hard. As soon as I realized I was pregnant, I was attached to the little one growing inside me. I had never felt more in love with anything or anyone in my life before. When he first…

When I found out I was pregnant with Conor I was single, young, and pretty stupid. When I told the ex-boyfriend the situation he quickly skipped town around the time I was 6 weeks along. I never heard from him again. I had to grow up and get my shit together fast, but in all honesty it wasn't that hard. As soon as I realized I was pregnant, I was attached to the little one growing inside me. I had never felt more in love with anything or anyone in my life before. When he first born it was beyond difficult, I was alone and he had colic for the first 6 months of his life. I thought I was going to lose my mind but we pulled through and I've always felt like we had a very special bond because of how it started. In the beginning I was all he had and he was all I had.

Now obviously Conor and I got very lucky when I found C, he is a great dad and treats Conor like his own. And now we get to add another baby to love to the mix. All in all I'd say I've been very blessed with how things turned out.

But herein lies the problem. Not so much a problem as a concern. My biggest fear (and trust me, there are a lot of course) about this pregnancy is that I'm not going to love this baby as much as I love Conor. Admitting that is both painful and humiliating. Painful because I feel horrible for even having that worry, humiliating because I know how ridiculous it is. And to add on to this fear is the fear that Conor and I will lose our closeness and he will suffer because of it (obviously, since I'm such a big bundle of mommy fun lately).

I think this pregnancy has really made me decide to go for the gold in mommy guilt this year. With the intense epidemic of mommy guilt I have to wonder why no one has come up with a cure all for us.

Oh wait, never mind, it's called the wine section as Costco.

Deep down inside I know I have plenty of love to equally devote to another child, I also know that Conor will not suffer from MORE love in our family. Sometimes it seems as though my mind is so intent on working overtime that it just must cover every possible thing there is to worry and obsess about until its exhausted all areas of concern. Make sense? Yea, not to me either.

Here's another confession

C's beer fridge has been taken over by caffeine free Coke and Naked juice. Bwahahahahaaa. I like to make these little changes to his life while he's away at work, less emotional for him.

Back to the issue of my insane worrying getting out of hand. The other day I had a total meltdown. My son has developed a tic. Seeing my son randomly and unintentionally start twitching his eye and "smiling" with only one side of his mouth has got to be the saddest sight. When I first noticed it happening a lot I came to the tearful conclusion that something was terribly wrong, my mind started going to very dark places. If you think my hypochondria for myself is bad, multiply it by 10 for when it comes to my child.

I promptly called his doctor and made an emergency appointment, to which we immediately all got dressed and drove the hour long drive for the doctor to confirm C's diagnosis. Which was that it's basically just a thing some kids do, a tic. Something that gets worse when he stressed out (he has a lot going on, needs a spa day) or tired.

Had I been in a right state of mind, I would have evaluated the situation. Seen that he obviously wasn't paralyzed in either side of his face, probably would have done a little research and then made an appointment for later in the week. Instead my reaction was to fall about, have a panic attack, and RUSH to the doctor's office, all the while planning how I would deal with the all the intense tests that were sure to follow this visit.

They need to make a pregnancy Xanax. They can call it The Anti-Sarah, it's okay I don't mind, I'll take one for the team. Literally.
 It's Okay Guys, I'm A Grown Up. tag:www.mombloggersclub.com,2013-01-16:988554:BlogPost:1333042 2013-01-16T20:40:08.000Z Sarah http://www.mombloggersclub.com/profile/SarahFox
One time, when I was 18ish, I went to a routine doctor's visit for something mundane, I can't remember what...let's go with ear wax build up (nothing traumatic about that right?). The visit ended with me being hooked up to a heart monitor for 24 hours to test for some kind of irregularity. Doesn't add up does it? The reason is that I had such a panic attack the doctor actually thought that my racing heart was associated with something other than my intense…

One time, when I was 18ish, I went to a routine doctor's visit for something mundane, I can't remember what...let's go with ear wax build up (nothing traumatic about that right?). The visit ended with me being hooked up to a heart monitor for 24 hours to test for some kind of irregularity. Doesn't add up does it? The reason is that I had such a panic attack the doctor actually thought that my racing heart was associated with something other than my intense hypochondria.

And people wonder why I dread medical offices of any kind. I am positive every trip to one will end in a similar manner to my ear wax incident.

As you can imagine, even though my first OB appointment was exciting it was also terrifying. Sitting in the office chugging my comforting daily cup of caffeine probably didn't help the situation but what can you do.

The pap smear itself wasn't as bad as I was expecting. telling the doctor it had been 3 years since my last one...yea that was a toughie. She promptly took me out back and publicly beat me.

Ok maybe not, but she did give a disapproving look that clearly chastised me for my irresponsibility. C piped up with "it's IMPOSSIBLE to get her to the doctor's for anything."

I shot him the angriest (yet, subtle) look I could muster for cluing in the woman who would be touching me in humiliating places that I was not a fan of her profession. That's like telling the guy hunting in your backyard that you voted democrat...twice.

Regardless the visit went by decently and I was not handed a death sentence However the wait for the results from the belated pap smear and blood work is killing me.

Plus side? There's definitely a baby in there!!

I called my mother today to inform her of the exciting news. I ended up handing the phone to Conor and letting him do most of the talking. He called me a chicken. Not really, but he might as well have.

Mom: "So what's new?"
Me: "Oh you know..."
Mom: "No...not really. What is it?"
Me: "Well....I....you know..."
Mom: "I'm confused...what is it?"
Me: "Er...oh! Here, talk to Conor, he has a pretty intense boo boo on his toe that he'd like to tell you about."

Obviously I'm a grown woman who has been living independently of her parents since I was 17 so it's not a big deal right? Wrong. My parents adore Conor and are also quite fond of C. They just don't understand why we're choosing to "live in sin" instead of just getting hitched already. I'm sure if we would pay a little visit to the court house and make it legal they would be thrilled for me to spawn some more. Unfortunately...probably not going to happen anytime soon. It's not that we don't WANT to get married, we do. Eventually.

Which is why I currently feel like I should go audition for 16 and pregnant. How do parents always have such a way of making us feel like disobedient children? Or is it just mine?

I'm a grown-up gosh darn it!!

Maybe that's what I should lead with....

While I'm confessing my lack of maturity...I also find Glee incredibly inspiring and I follow most of the news on the Kardashians (I'm still rooting for you Khole, you crazy kids can get through this!).
 Live And Let Happy tag:www.mombloggersclub.com,2013-01-03:988554:BlogPost:1330239 2013-01-03T21:00:00.000Z Sarah http://www.mombloggersclub.com/profile/SarahFox
So I'm starting off the year with a pretty hefty worry, and it's one I've had before.

 There is nothing like creating life or being solely responsible for the life of another human being.

Yep, nothing like it...to make an already anxious person turn into a paranoid mess of crazy.

So here's the deal, I know you're suppose to wait 3 months in case anything goes wrong, or to protect your privacy, or to have enough…

So I'm starting off the year with a pretty hefty worry, and it's one I've had before.

 There is nothing like creating life or being solely responsible for the life of another human being.

Yep, nothing like it...to make an already anxious person turn into a paranoid mess of crazy.

So here's the deal, I know you're suppose to wait 3 months in case anything goes wrong, or to protect your privacy, or to have enough time to plan a quick get away and pack everything up before running far, far away from any and all relatives, etc.

But I peed on a stick this week and there were two 'lil pink lines and within two hours my life had already turned upside down yet again.

Is everything okay? How quick can I find a good doctor? How am I going to deal with the inevitable panic attack the moment I walk into another dr's office? Can I handle more anxiety? What if I've already been blessed enough? Is there such a thing as being too lucky in life? Is happiness a ticking time bomb? What if the pregnancy doesn't last? What if my baby isn't healthy? What if Conor feels left out and unloved? What if C can't handle my emotional roller coaster times 10? What if I can't survive off 2 cups of coffee a day? What if I gain 75 pounds like the last time around? What if I can't sleep in any position but my stomach?

Oh. My. God. The crazy is tangible I'm sure. Here's the worst one.

What if I'm yet again so beat down with worry that I miss out on being happy?

Postpartum anxiety made the first few months of Conor's life so much more exhausting than it already is to have a colicky newborn. I will always feel like I missed out on something really great by making myself sick about whether or not he would wake up tomorrow or whether or not his dr's visits would result in something bad being found out. I did miss out. I don't want to miss out again.

Can we start over? Let's start over.

I'm incubating baby numero dos.

:-)
 5 Tips To Cool Your Worries About Your Children tag:www.mombloggersclub.com,2012-09-27:988554:BlogPost:1299991 2012-09-27T19:13:06.000Z Stacy York http://www.mombloggersclub.com/profile/StacyYork
In light of the Bumbo Baby Seat recall, I am reminded of how much we worry as parents.

When our first-born child, Stella was only 2 hours old, I said to my husband, "You better

have a darn good relationship with her for her entire life. You may be the only

connection we have to her in her teen years." He just looked at me like I was crazy. In

his defense, I probably was a little crazy. I had just gone through labor. That said, I

clarified my statement to him…

In light of the Bumbo Baby Seat recall, I am reminded of how much we worry as parents.

When our first-born child, Stella was only 2 hours old, I said to my husband, "You better
have a darn good relationship with her for her entire life. You may be the only
connection we have to her in her teen years." He just looked at me like I was crazy. In
his defense, I probably was a little crazy. I had just gone through labor. That said, I
clarified my statement to him the next day and still stand by statement today. This is
how that conversation went:
Hubby: Are you aware that you lectured me about my relationship with our daughter
yesterday?
Me: Yep. I still feel that way.
Hubby: Help me understand.
Me: You see, girls are tough. They are emotional and passionate, curious and intense.
They are gentle and tough, sweet and bold. They are complicated. Eventually, they think they know more than their mothers. So, if they have a strong relationship with their fathers, they won't stray too far and try to get their needs met by some teenager. Dad can be the mediator if needed.
Hubby: You got all of that in her first two hours of life?
I just smiled. This story had formed many years ago. The seed of what a daughter
needs was planted in my heart long before I became a mother. I am the oldest of 3 girls
and have also worked with hundreds of teenagers. While I was pregnant, I thought
about what I wanted our relationship with our child to be like. We didn't know if we were
having a girl or a boy. Quite frankly, the thought of parenting scared the daylights out of
me. So, when that precious little bundle joined our world, I wanted to make sure the
three of us were on the same page.
This is just a little glimpse into how a parent might worry about her child. As I reflect on
that moment, I realize now that I was so worried about our daughter's future 15 years
from that moment, that I was not 100% present, in the moment, with my husband and
our daughter. I later learned a great quote, "Fear causes us to worry about the future,
react from the past, and takes us out of the present." I am not sure who stated that, but
it has been a mantra in my head over and over as I work with my husband to raise our
children.
I have enlisted a few parenting strategies that I use and I teach others to use in order to get through those moments of worry:

Ask yourself if this a justified worry or am I making something out of nothing? For example, are you scared that your child will get hit by a car when they are out playing with their friends. Or, are you concerned that your child will be a drug user when they are a toddler?

If you have a justified worry, talk about it with your child. Focus on safety and share your concerns. "I love when you play with your friends. I love it more when you are safe and look for traffic. Show me how you look for traffic when you play with your friends."

When you are really worried about the future of your child, make a plan. If you do not want you child to use drugs in their teen years, help them develop great self-esteem and have the ability to say no. That means they have to practice saying no with you first.

Focus on the moment at hand. Most likely, right in this very moment, your child is not in crisis and neither are you. Keep that in mind and enjoy this very moment.

Prepare, communicate, and practice. One of my big worries is losing a toddler in a big crowd like a carnival or fair. So, we have to prepare, communicate, and practice expectations for what happens in big crowds BEFORE we get to that moment. Our brains need lots of repetition before we have mastered something, so practice multiple times and your child will be prepared.

Remember, it's normal to worry about your child. However, when that worry becomes debilitating or starts to affect the relationship with your child, intervene. Seek advice from friends or professional help if you feel like your worry isimpacting your everyday happiness and connection with your child.
 Thundershirt My Ass tag:www.mombloggersclub.com,2012-09-13:988554:BlogPost:1294677 2012-09-13T16:03:22.000Z Jennifer Marshall http://www.mombloggersclub.com/profile/JenniferMarshall

Our dog has earned many a nickname in his three years with the family -- Goatdog, asshole, jackass, dick. But the one name that kinda surprises me (especially given the fact that he body slammed himself through the friggin' front door) is WIMP. Yes, for some reason, the big lug turns into one giant wussbag when it comes to thunderstorms.

Of…

Our dog has earned many a nickname in his three years with the family -- Goatdog, asshole, jackass, dick. But the one name that kinda surprises me (especially given the fact that he body slammed himself through the friggin' front door) is WIMP. Yes, for some reason, the big lug turns into one giant wussbag when it comes to thunderstorms.

Of course, we didn't really discover this little phobia of his until a storm hit in the middle of the night, when he began pacing back and forth in our bedroom. And let me just tell ya, dog nails and hardwood floors do not make beautiful music at 3 AM. He was literally panting and slobbering and ten kinds of wigged out.

So I yanked his 50 pound ass up into our bed so that he would finally calm down, and I could get some shut eye. However, my husband was not having any part of a furry beast rolling around in the sack with us. It was evidently up to me to figure out a peaceful solution to this situation.

Thanks to Google and the lovely peeps on Twitter, I found out about the Thundershirt, which is supposedly "the proven solution for dog anxiety". It fits snugly around the dog to help him feel more at ease, kinda like swaddling a baby. And when the website said that "over 80% of dogs show improvement", well, hells bells, I was sold!

Unfortunately, though, the first opportunity I had to try out the thunder wonder, it was again smack dab in the middle of the night, and the damn thing was all the way downstairs. But the next time it stormed, I was better prepared -- I'd put it in our bedroom closet for easy access. And when the dog started freaking, I wrapped him right up like a pig in a blanket and waited for the magic to begin.

As our bad luck would have it, though, Goatdog seems to be part of the 20% that is oblivious to the magic. Awesome. He continued to panic with each boom of thunder and ended up back in bed with us. Which is a problem. So now I'm gonna have to look into the possibility of Xanax for dogs (cause apparently, they can prescribe that). And I need to make sure I order enough so that he can share some with me....

 Musings of a Mom Going Through Separation Anxiety tag:www.mombloggersclub.com,2012-09-05:988554:BlogPost:1292220 2012-09-05T19:00:00.000Z Samantha Catabas Manuel http://www.mombloggersclub.com/profile/SamanthaCatabasManuel

As my title suggests, I am going through "separation" anxiety. That's right! I didn't have time to worry if my…

As my title suggests, I am going through "separation" anxiety. That's right! I didn't have time to worry if my son will ever experience this on his first day in school. For I was actually more worried about me!

I honestly can't find the right words to explain what I was feeling the past days as I was transitioning my son to his first few days of "school" experience. Ofcourse, there is that wonderful feeling of joy and excitement as I witness this milestone in my son's life. But there is also that feeling of anxiety and of facing the reality of detachment.

I've been a hands-on mom eversince my son was born. No nannies and no extended family to depend on. I took care of him from day 1 of his life. And everyday for the past 4 years, it was my way of doing things for him. I knew in an instant if he was hungry... if he needed a nap... if he wanted something ... if he needed comfort... or what toy he wanted to play with...

We were practically together 24/7. We have our stressful moments of course... in fact, a lot of times. But we also have our precious moments - like getting a hug out of nowhere... hearing him say, "i love you, mommy!" just when I'm feeling tired after a full day's chores and responsibilities.

Suddenly, he is going to school. Even if he will only be away from me for four hours a day, I can't help thinking if he was okay. But ofcourse, those four hours are also a great way for me to unwind, be on my own for a while, and enjoy me-time... but instead, I find myself often looking at the clock wishing it's time to pick him up.

The great thing about it though is that, being apart from my son for a while makes me miss him even more - enough to make each moment count whenever I am finally with him. And everytime I would pick him up and he would see me, I can sense he feels the same way.

It's only his first week in school but already I am learning so much about this new phase of motherhood. I know this is just the start of more changes to come. But one thing I am sure of... my love for my son will never change. It will grow even more as we journey through the different milestones in his life.

 Coffee Moments with Sam