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What's Your Zombie Contingency Plan? 11 Practical Strategies
All the men (and most women) I know have one thing in common: They have a zombie contingency plan. If the zombies arise tomorrow, everybody has at least a hazy outline of what, exactly, they would do to survive the coming onslaught. It's the single best part about the zombie mythos: planning your strategy. So I asked everybody I could think of to submit their own zombie contingency plans, and this is but a small sample of what I received:
The "I Had a Good Plan But Then I Tripped" StratagemBy Robert Brockway
Since I'm planning on criticizing the plans submitted, it's only fair that I go first. My zombie contingency plan: I live in the inner city, so I'm pretty well fucked. But I also live in Oregon, which is somewhat sparsely populated outside of the cities. The only way to survive is to get out as fast as possible. To that end, I've looked around and I know that I live within a few blocks of three important things. First is the Gun Room, the scariest fucking gun shop in America. If you want to kill something, the Gun Room not only has the supplies to do it, but they'd probably do it for you at a reasonable fee (caution: "reasonable fees" as dictated by the insane may vary greatly in their definition of "reasonable"). One block away from the Gun Room is the fur supplier/taxidermist. Apart from having warm, tough, weatherproof hides aplenty, they also have complete hunting/survival materials and several items that could make great melee weapons, from old decorative lumberjacking gear to a giant stuffed moose head (come on, what it lacks in practicality it more than makes up for in style). Two blocks away from the Gun Room is the Post Office, and the Post Office has a lot of fully-fueled, well-maintained, simple, rugged vehicles in their high-fenced back lot. They have the keys on premises, and all vehicles have very few windows, but a lot of storage space for supplies. Some of the newer ones do not have driver's side doors, but the older ones have pure steel driver's side doors with old school bolt-locks. They get fair gas mileage, are unlikely to break down and can handle rugged conditions. I know the backroads to get through to these areas, and I would not leave my transport until I reached them. I would load up on guns, ammo and hunting/outdoor supplies, then grab a Post Office truck and take those same backroads out east where civilization thins out a bit. Once there, I would raid one of the many towns along the off-routes that have populations among the dozens, if that. A small pharmacy, a feed market and a grocery store are all you need now that you're supplied with gear and out of the city. There are plenty of those around, so I wouldn't waste time grabbing anything in a danger zone as hot as the city. Even a roadside gas station has first aid kits, batteries, flashlights and packaged food. I would pick my way back to Central Oregon around the Indian reservations where there is fertile ground and high, flat plateaus in the middle of otherwise even plains. High ground to defend, structures already built, out of the way and you can see anybody coming from literally miles away. In the winter it gets cold enough to freeze, but no blizzards or white out conditions exist. I would wait for the winter and see where to go from there--move north and hope for more permanent settlement or just wait out the worst of it until control is restored. Pros: It is awesome. Cons: I once ran face-first into a sliding glass door. I am not competent enough to do any of this. I would probably trip over my own feet and stumble slapstick-style into an undead group hug.
The "I Will Miss You Dearly" StratagemBy Meagan (my girlfriend)
When the zombies appear and start messing with everything, I'm going to rely on you to have planned everything related to our survival. I'll steal a pair of Wheelies to wear so I can glide away when I need to make a speedy exit, but I'll still have good traction when running. I'm also going to pack up our nice sheets because I'm sure you never thought about what linens we would be sleeping on while we're on the run. Before the Internet goes down, I'll get right on making our Zombie Mix CD. Can we have Fiber One yogurt in the zombie apocalypse? Being constipated wouldn't help our cause out any... Pros: It is adorable. Cons: You will be dead within minutes.
The "Feed the Elderly (to Zombies)" StrategemBy Jennifer Bonesteel
Well, I workout everyday so that I can be faster than a slowly moving shuffle. I also try to hang out with at least one person who is slower than me (obese or elderly) so that when the zombies attack I can leave them to be eaten. I'll miss my grandma, but a zombie apocalypse is no laughing matter. Pros: Check the byline, again.That's her real name. Jennifer. Fucking. BONESTEEL. I have no doubt she will not only survive the apocalypse intact, but quite possibly will do so in a silver rhinestone tanktop, and eventually end up running a methane fueled trading post with a mentally handicapped giant and a little person. Cons: Lacks detail. Sure you're going to feed them old people, but where are you going to feed them those old people, and which old people go first? Details are important. Not like old people.
The "Eternal Sausage Party" StratagemBy Thomas SimmonsStart of the outbreak. Destroy the steps to my front porch, and barricade the first floor windows of my house. Wait for the shit to hit the fan, get as many friends and loved ones over to safety. Few days later. After the mass panic has resided a bit, mainly due to more people being infected and dying, scavenge as many supplies as possible. I live in a large fraternity house, so staying put may not be such a bad idea. Load up on food, guns, ammo and supplies. If the outlook for the house is bleak, attempt to clear out and move in to one of the large freshman dorms that were fallout shelters during the cold war. Weeks later. Start a small farming operation on the roof of the building, or the court yard of the house, depending on the location. Months later. If still alive, attempt to lower the zombie population--i.e. kill the fuck out of them--and look for survivors. Years later. Start over? kill as many zombies as possible. Pros: Low expectations. There is no grand scheming here to distract from the day to day survival, and the simpler a plan of action is, the less there is to go wrong. Cons: You are stuck with frat guys forever. "James Bro-lin, that sounds like a sausage party! Who brought the chicks?" "It's the zombie apocalypse, Broseph Stalin, no reason we can't have a kegger!" And so on. You will last two days before the madness takes you.
The "Hope My Head Will Explode Shortly Before Theirs Does" StratagemBy Davis Fyke
Basically using my access to multiple arms and my connections with the chief of police, I would hunker down in the armory with my guns and crack. All I really need anyways. Pros: Guns. Cons: Crack.
The "Don't Feed The Animals" StratagemBy Sarah
Luckily there is a retirement home/community only a few blocks from my house. Plenty of applesauce and boardgames for me; plenty of slow and senile people for the zombies. Pros: Another plan that relies heavily on feeding old people to the undead. It is nice to see that practicality is taking front seat here, with such concerns as "love" or "morality" in the back. Way Back. Like in a trailer. At the gas station. Twenty-two miles ago. Which is now covered in zombies. Cons: Again, lacking in details. It seems like everybody planning on using the elderly as zombie chaff have little else to go off of. What happens when the elderly run out? Much like feeding wild animals, you have taught the zombies to rely on your location to provide free food. The difference here being that when you show up without food for the pigeons, their revolt does little but soil your suit, whereas if you show up empty handed to a zombie feeding, you end up being that which they soil their suits with.
The "Get By With a (Very) Little Help From My Friends" StratagemBy Brett Jones
Alright my plan is actually overall very simple, but is broken down into several steps so that they can be altered based on a few factors: the type of outbreak, heavily infested areas which would be to dangerous to attempt at passing, survivor error or random events out of our control. Step 1: Determine the type of outbreak. Is this an airborne strain? Is it necromancy? Is it passed mainly through bites or can in be transferred by clawing or open wounds? Is this the fault of a biological weapons facility under the guise of a pharmaceutical company? This also applies to what type of zombies are we dealing with? Are they fast? Are they smart? Can they climb? Have there been odd mutations in the strain causing almost superhuman alterations in some of the victims? Once all these factors are determined, THEN and only then may you proceed, because if you just run out of your house waving a machete in hopes that you'll make it, you'll be deader than Liam Neeson's wife. (Too soon?) (Editor's Note: Yes, yes it is. But fear not, there will be little room for political correctness in the zombie apocalypse. Zombies are a notoriously "blue crowd." Get it? There's always time for a zinger!)Step 2: Gather your team. We've all thought about it. If you're reading these plans right now, you've thought about it. If there is an outbreak, who will you take, and who will you leave behind? Sadly enough this usually means leaving your parents and siblings behind unless they have some sort of useful skill. That is all what it boils down to. Do they have a useful skill? It's a good idea to bring a wide range of skilled persons with you. Bring the strong, the intelligent and even bring yourself a couple of slow moving people to put a bit of meat between you and the horde of ravenous bastards. It's important, though, to not bog your team down with too many useless members. You may still have some shred of humanity left in you that makes you want to save that child, but he's just going to slow you down. Try to keep your team tight and essential. Step 3: Get some supplies. Unless you plan on eating canned cranberry sauce for years and beating the infected away with rocks, chances are you're going to need some supplies. The smart zombie survivor already has at least a bladed weapon and a bit of food at the ready, but it won't last you very long. After your team is together you should head towards a large department store such as Super Target, Wal-Mart or Costco but be sure to scope it out first. Big store means a lot of customers which means a lot of infected. Remember your goal is to survive not be reckless. Now places like Wal-Mart all have an outdoor survival section and this should be your first stop. Grab axes, machetes, saws and everything that might be an essential. Next grab tools and medical supplies and then finally grab food. You're looking for food that will last a long time, canned food, cereal etc. Step 4: Move to safety. Now the common tactic for zombie safety is to find a military base or a heavily fortified area nearby. That's not enough. With the amount of people who will turn infected you'll quickly find yourself overrun by the horde. The safest option is to steal a puddlejumper aircraft (or befriend some one who can fly a plane) and get to either Hawaii or Alaska. I'm going with Hawaii on this one. One of the small islands is best. Being disconnected from the mainland, there is a good chance that the infection hasn't spread that far, and if it HAS then with a smaller population to deal with it will be easier to hold back the horde. Yes it is very important when on the island to locate a heavily fortified structure and build up your defenses but it is equally important to locate a supply of food, and tools. Step 5: Stay smart and stay safe. Now it is a matter of waiting it out. No doubt you will lose some allies. This comes with the territory. The important part is that you stay alive. Keep your base of operations organized and send out for supplies only when needed. Clear the corpses from the base and always keep someone awake to look out. And always keep your weapons on the up and up. Like Three Dog says "Never forget the importance of periodic weapon maintenance; rifle, pistol, police baton, I don't care which. If your weapon is falling apart, the only wasteland asshole it's going to kill is you. So be smart. Salvage those parts and make repairs whenever you can." Pros: Comprehensive, complete and largely lacking in any of that pesky mercy or distracting human sentiment. Cons: Largely lacking in human sentiment means you are unlikely to "befriend" anybody, much less a puddlejumper pilot, who will, regardless, have nowhere near enough fuel to get to Hawaii. You will die together 1/4 of the way there, silently despising one another as you sink into the ocean.
The "I'm on a boat, motherfucker!" StratagemBy Chris Butler
So I go to school in Maine, and I'm right on the coast. I have a couple of family members who live further up the coast of Maine on an island that's pretty much 95 percent redneck hicks, and five percent deer. The plan is essentially this: When the zombie outbreak finally does occur, my cousins are going to hijack the ferry used to shuttle cars from the mainland to the island. They're going to float her down the coast until they get to my school. Myself, and any other unsullied survivors will swim out to the ferry, where we will begin the trip back to the island where we will make our stand. The amount of guns, alcohol and pissed-off lobster men will ensure a small amount of relative safety until winter, when the zombies freeze. Resupply missions will then be sent out to look for survivors and other food. Sadly, or perhaps fortunately, I have discussed this plan in great length with my cousins. Pros: The ferry transport is a great idea for an organized evacuation. Cons: Unless you know some ferry captains, you're probably not getting out of the docks. Survivors swimming to boat could be infected. Lobster men are notoriously unreliable folk, unless you're referring to the new roster of the Crash Test Dummies. Those guys are fucking solid.
The "It's Even Fireproof Because Fire Needs Oxygen to Thrive" StratagemBy Jeff Shock
Technically I have two zombie plans: fast zombie (a la 28 Days Later) or slow zombies (like Shaun of the Dead). The fast zombie is pretty simple: First, get food and supplies such as Spaghetti-o's, canned foods, Twinkies, etc. Then procure a nice bank vault and a shotgun. The slow zombie is a bit more in-depth: Walk (briskly) to a mountainous area that's hard to climb. I seriously doubt I'll need to run. Also, it might be preferable to go to a mountain in Alaska as the cold temperatures added to their already low body temps could turn them to corpse-sicles Pros: Multiple plans for multiple scenarios. Too often we fall victim to the arrogant assumption that we know what the zombie apocalypse will be like. Cons: Bank vault = low on oxygen, low on supplies and hard to gain access to. Alaskan mountain = also hard to gain access to... unless you live on an Alaskan mountain. In which case, you're most likely there precisely because of the fear of something like a zombie apocalypse, and so probably also have your stores, weapons and hermit-like persona at the ready. You have made your plan and are living it, so congratulations! (P.S. Sweet beard and flannel shirt, Alaskan native! You totally don't look psycho or nothin'!)
The "Human Produce" StratagemBy Patrick KnasiakStep 1: Gather "homies" and attempt to keep said "homies" to a decent boy/girl ratio. Step 2: Gather weapons. We were going to do this by getting my friend's husband to donate all his crazy-ass hunting equipment, so we would have the guns themselves, in addition to the ammo and the ability to make more ammo ('cause most drunken hunters make their own ammo.) (Editor's Note: This is a terrifying factoid.)Step 3: Invade a grocery store, preferably one that is bigger then a local grocery store, but not as big as a Wal-Mart. The reason being that Wal-Marts usually have an insane number of entrances/exits, while the smaller ones don't have enough food to sustain said "homies." Also, attempt to find a grocery store that has a liquor license, because let's be honest, what's more fun then blowing the heads of the undead while drunk off your ass? Then it's pretty much just barricading the doors with a heavy object (we figured the ice machine would be heavy enough to block the doors, and big enough to cover the whole door. If your ice machine isn't big enough, then proceed to blow the fuck out of any zombies that try to get in, then use their rotting bodies as a natural barricade; the smell will be annoying at first, but not as annoying as being eaten alive by your dead grandmother). Finally, use the phone to contact others that perhaps have more guns. NOTE: If no one is reachable by phone, then hook a music playing device to the overhead speakers and blast some heavy ass death metal, because not only is it fun to kill things while listening to death metal, its also a great way for passersby of an un-zombified nature to know that there are other non-zombies occupying the structure. Pros: It's always good to know a drunken, mentally unstable ammunition maker. Your plan, from the corpse-barricade to the simple aside that it is "always fun to kill things while listening to death metal," terrifies me. Cons: Grocery stores use display windows as basic marketing tools. The front of nearly every grocery store, regardless of size, is made up of large glass planes to show off the merchandise. It's the same logic that put those windows there in the first place that is going to screw you: It's there to put food on display.
The "Uh...what was that first part again?" StratagemBy Tanya SilanderAuthors note: I am writing this from a fully and completely realistic point of view, I add none of the frivolous magical properties of a ghoul or zombie, and disregard the illogical completely. The Zombie Survival Guide by Max Brooks, takes the first part of the book explaining the virus "Solanum," and I am going to work off of that idea, using the same name. It is that concept alone that I am working with; that it is a virus. All other concepts are completely scientifically based and we will explore the possibility that a virus such as Solanum exists in nature and that it has the ability to infect a hosts brain cells (neurons), first by entering the circulatory system via bodily fluid interaction of an infected individual and an uninfected individual, and finally making its way to the neuronal cells and manipulating said cells. I will disregard the communicability of 100 percent used in the book in favor of a more realistic number, 99.4 percent as used in The Stand by Stephen King for a man-made virus (given that that is the most likely scenario for the creation of this virus). Critics may say that this is not a "zombie" contingency plan, and to them I say nay, it depends on your definition of "zombie." Plus, I find the idea of realism much more horrifying than fiction. Fiction you can brush off as being something implausible... The following may be fiction, but it is very plausible. Skip this if you don't give a fuck about biology: In order to realistically write a zombie contingency plan, one must have knowledge of how a zombie functions in order to exploit their weaknesses and predict their attacks. I am telling everybody right fucking now, the anatomy of the zombies outlined in The Zombie Survival Guide is impossible. The zombies would disintegrate, with cells lysing on a scale so grand that there is no way they could eat you/pass on the virus before turning into a pile of mush, let alone have the capacity of movement. Therefore, I am about to discredit any possibility in the known world for a human body to function without the proper systems in place. A virus is considered "pseudoliving" which means that it is not technically alive by the standards of science. Without the host cells machinery, a virus cannot grow or replicate. Thus, a virus must take control of the host cells machinery and use that machinery to create its own DNA and subsequent proteins. This hinges on one very important point, the cell must function as it has always functioned. It needs glucose, fat or protein to begin the aerobic respiration that uses oxygen as a final electron acceptor in the path to making ATP (energy) to run the metabolic processes of the cell. The implications of this are great, the zombie has to have working lungs to bring oxygen into the system, working circulatory system to transfer said oxygen along with nutrients and wastes, and systems which can eliminate said wastes. This brings into light the very real weaknesses of the zombie. It must be "living" for all intents and purposes, but that does not mean it will be easy to kill. Here's the kicker: The virus can manipulate the cells. The neuronal cells that stop replicating in adult humans are once again capable of regeneration, a virus can lie dormant in a cell for very long periods of time (as evidenced by HIV, which progresses into AIDs once the virus decides to lyse the cells releasing the virus into the system) and make the cell replicate with viral DNA in the nucleus creating hundreds of cells with viral DNA in them. This means the virus will make the neuronal cells replicate, creating millions of new neurons each with viral DNA in them, each with the ability to control more of the processes of the human brain. One may also imply that the zombie is much smarter than your average human being, with a larger number of neuronal cells capable of propagating larger numbers of signals at a faster speed. I contest the idea that zombies are stumbling creatures with an off-kilter gate and little hand-eye coordination. I believe that this hypothetical virus would create extremely intelligent humans which it would have full control over, by producing the proteins and enzymes of its own DNA rather than that of the original cell, it would be fully plausible that the human infected with this virus would be controlled by the desires of the virus, which would be to infect new hosts. Also, the infected individual would not be the same person they were in their lives with everything from memories to basic wants and desires being manipulated and changed by the virus. The zombie would also have a heightened set of sensory systems, and it's plausible that the neural signals from their external body are blocked by the virus in the CNS, reducing and possibly eliminating the effects of pain or touch sensation. Furthermore, they may act with a hive mentality, working towards a common goal (and remember, they're smart), and their circulatory system may be routed in order to increase the amount of blood to the muscles, increasing their strength and agility. The most horrific realization: They may look completely normal. The virus does not necessarily impact their vocal chords, and they would look like a regular human being. Their behavior would be notably different, but they could pass the virus on before the realization of what has happened is fully recognized. Contingency Plan With this knowledge in place, we can begin to determine what will and what will not work. Quarantines will be key in containing the virus to large areas (in the range of regions to complete countries). Given our inability to distinguish the zombies from the humans, large quarantine areas will be key. All air and sea ports should be shut down, and control of the army and air bases is essential. A 99.4 percent communicable virus can most likely become airborne, especially since viral particles are pseudoliving and can enter a dormant stage if not active in a cell (such is the case when they are housed within a water molecule, such as on a humid day). Dry climates are best due to such conditions, especially since a zombie lacks any other desire than to pass on its virus and thus does not drink, dehydration would be a good way to defeat them. Other ways to kill the zombies via natural causes would be to expose them to harsh environmental conditions, such as the extreme hot or cold, high saline, low/high pH and anoxic environments all fit the bill. Thus, the best areas to flee to would be the deserts, the higher and lower altitudes and the poles. The worst places would be the mountains, valleys, jungles and tropics. Also, since they are human we can kill them if it comes down to that. We would want to see them coming given that a more intelligent being would outsmart us in a terrain war using the mountains or valleys. The plains and deserts are ideal for such a situation. Saskatchewan, where you can watch your dog run away for three days, is a good place to be for a zombie apocalypse. This is where the plan gets sleazy and corrupt. We need to get rid of these zombies before they kill us all, and we have to do it in a way that causes the least amount of damage, least bloodshed (especially into the water systems; I'll say it again, viruses are pseudoliving, they can live in the soil and water forever until it attaches to a host cell whose machinery it can manipulate) and the most successful. Thus we will need two plans, one for "the bait" and one for "the survivors." You're reading the survivors guide. The bait will be those that believe a virus can evoke a stage of being "undead" in which these things cannot be killed and the mountains and valleys should be used to hide from and trick them. The survivors guide is for those that know these fuckers are smarter than us, and would kick our ass in a terrain based war of wit. Trust me, this is necessary. Think of the people we could get to follow the bait guide? Bush, Hannah Montana, the Jonas Brothers, etc. Man, I'm beginning to WELCOME the zombie apocalypse. Anyways, we can lure the zombies into the valleys and mountains, from there dams can be taken out and landslides created provided we still have control of the army bases (I thank you Wright brothers). Meanwhile, safe zones can be created and established in areas where the weather would kill any remaining zombies in a disposable manner (such as through freezing, and might I add that if you freeze a zombie it would be much like freezing a human, where the plasma and extra/intracellular fluid freezes into crystals which would tear the cells apart resulting in death). Due to the high communicability, the zombie bodies will have to be destroyed, I'm thinking a controlled nuclear blast in the areas the zombies were lured to. Fire is a good way to kill a virus, since even the pseudoliving cannot deny the destructive powers of heat to proteins which make up their outer coat. Thus, to the areas where any remaining zombies fled to and eventually died due to extreme environmental conditions, let the forest fires reign. Note: this plan is kind of geared toward North and South America following the quarantine, it can be applied to Europe as well. Japan, if they got hit with this virus, they're kind of screwed. Britain, you're screwed. Australia... well you guys have all that poisonous stuff, so I'm pretty sure the zombies are afraid of you. China, fucking nuke them if this happens, because with that high of a population they are fucked. Canada, Russia and the Scandinavian countries will pull through nicely, and the US, if you guys don't go all batshit on me, you'll be alright (I'm talking to you Utah, you and your Mormons, lol.) Pros: Holy shit. Easily the most well thought out, well reasoned response received. Logical, intelligent and practical. Cons: You're no fun. You ruined zombies! You ruined everything and I don't like this game anymore and I'm going home.
Find more from Robert on Twitter, Facebook or his own site, I Fight Robots. Bring ammo and first aid supplies; food will be provided (you.)


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Give it up already, Lysacek.
Men's skating has moved on from your mediocrity and personally I think it's really super-arrogant that he expects to just stroll into Nationals after not having competed in three years and win or come second. Hope Max, Ross, Ricky, Joshua and Jason all kick his over-rated orange hiney.

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MARTINSBURG - To some in the crowd gathered along South Market Street Tuesday, the rainbow in the sky minutes before Martinsburg's agricultural parade would have suggested the worst weather was over.
It wasn't.
Rain drove onto the parade for the better part of a half-hour, leaving only the boldest of children to dive for the candy thrown from passing cars and John Deere tractors. Nevertheless, nearly every spectator seemed willing to stick it out for the parade, the borough's 31st.
Article Photos
Mirror photo by Patrick Waksmunski
Taylor Heck (left), her son, Cameron, 2, her stepmother, Billie, and Billie's daughter, Lauren, 7, all of New Enterprise, sit protected by their umbrellas while watching the annual Martinsburg Agricultural Parade on Tuesday evening.
"Usually we ride the truck," said Lisa Walters of Roaring Spring, holding a plastic bag atop her head while her husband and three children watched tractors go by. In the past, she's ridden with the Friendship Fire Company during the parade.
"This year, we decided to have family time instead," she said. "Big mistake. We should have rode in the truck."
While on-off downpours left many scurrying for cover, the sun's eventual return allowed the thick crowds to enjoy the music, including both the Central High School and Northern Bedford marching bands, in peace.
There were historic cars, riders on horseback and the full Morrisons Cove aristocracy: a fire queen and fire princess, a dairy princess, at least one dairy maid and a little prince - not to mention little Miss Morrisons Cove and a handful of other monarchs.
But for the youngest spectators, it was all about the candy. One young boy, warned by his mother not to run in front of a massive tractor in search of Tootsie Rolls, replied: "I can go under it."
The borough's July 4 celebration is set to continue through Saturday, with carnival rides, live performances and food at the Morrisons Cove Memorial Park every evening.
Fireworks are scheduled for Thursday and Saturday nights.
Mirror Staff Writer Ryan Brown is at 946-7457.


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Tuesday, October 23, 2012
The Washington Nationals better hope GM Mike Rizzo knows what he's talking about when he says this year's playoff appearance would be the first of many for the new-look Nats.
The team with the best record in the National League couldn't fend off the never-say-die St. Louis Cardinals. Pitcher Stephen Strasburg's arm could have changed that outcome.
The Nats, who decided to shelf Strasburg for the season, made their first post-season appearance in 79 years and tanked.
Try as baseball might in stacking the deck in favor of the teams with the best records, those teams aren't making it to the World Series.
The Cardinals stand poised to do it again technically as the playoffs' worst team. St. Louis beat Atlanta in the wildcard play-in game before running the table through the NLDS. The Cardinals are on the cusp of doing the same with the San Francisco Giants in the NLCS.
The Nats and Yankees, who ran away with their division titles over 162 games, collapsed over the first two weeks in October, the Yankees to the point that their eventual dismemberment a la Philadelphia last year is inevitable.
When do you bench the game's alleged best player who makes more than $29 million a season? When playoff time rolls around A-Rod couldn't hit sand if he fell off a camel.
Washington's decision to shelve Stephen Strasburg after 159 and 2/3 innings pitched and a full two weeks before the regular season ended came back to bite the Nationals where it hurt the most – in additional playoff games hosted.
The Nats were blown out in their first post-season home game in three generations and in just their second home post-season game, faced elimination and Stephen Strasburg was not pitching. Strasburg is Rizzo's kajillion dollar investment and not even a chance at a World Series ring THIS year could sway the Washington GM from his decision.
The Cardinals made short order of the Strasburg-less Nats facing a young closer working his third consecutive ninth inning in Game 5 of the NL Division Series.
Rizzo's kid gloves approach with his young arms apparently only applied to Strasburg as he allowed closer Drew Storen to march out to the mound for three straight games.
The Golden Rule of Closers is, "Don't overuse your closer," and Washington did. Storen's fastball was flat and his slider had no bite. He spent most of the ninth inning backing up third. Now with the Redskins' RGIII battling concussion issues and the NHL strike de-icing the Capitals, Nats fans are facing a long winter in D.C.
As for the Yankees, their post-season never caught fire against Detroit.
First Derek Jeter breaks his ankle in what could possibly be a career-ending fracture that will require surgery. I think this sends Derek off to Chipper Land (retirement).
As for A-Rod, the Yankees will find a way to unload his $29 million annual contract. Look for him to land in his hometown Miami. Having A-Rod in pinstripes when he brings baseball's all-time home run record back to New York where it belongs isn't worth the four-or-five World Series rings they could have won if Alex could actually hit in pressure situations.
Still, baseball fans everywhere are smiling.
The only thing that would make this any better would be if the Boston Red Sox had been swept out of the playoffs as well.
Oh wait, the Sox finished dead last in the AL East.
I like it. Christmas indeed came early this year.
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To say parenthood changes a person is a gross understatement. Yet, how can one put into words what happens when, all of a sudden, you are responsible for the welfare of another human being?
For some reason, we become snack-toting, minivan-driving people who think about things like organic produce and bike helmets. We lose our sense of humor.
But we shouldn't. Kids are funny. Parenting, when it doesn't make you cry, is funny.
I'm here to help you keep perspective when one of your children drops butter on the floor and tries to clean it up with her bare hands and the other one obliviously walks through it and smears it everywhere and your kitchen becomes an ice-skating rink.
Or maybe that just happens at my house.
I'm a mom and I blog, which means you will hear about my family. And because I will talk about them a lot, I'd like you to meet them. Virtually speaking, of course.
My youngest just turned 8 and is in second grade. When I asked what I should write about her, she said that she is funny and very good at volleyball. May I add that she does not have a confidence problem? Although she has total justification about the volleyball thing - after all, she has attended three practices and played two games in her career. And there was that one time in a game that she served the ball over the net.
She also asks lots of random questions like, "Would you rather live in the desert and not litter or litter and not live in the desert?" These questions often have no context and are just arbitrarily posed as we are driving somewhere. I used to try and psychoanalyze them but have given up. All I can surmise from this one is that she apparently does not look favorably upon those who litter. Woodsy Owl would be proud.
My oldest is 10, in fifth grade, and the fashionista of the group. She spends 20-30 minutes each evening planning out outfits, accessories, shoes and hairstyles for the following school day. I should note that our school has a strict dress code with uniforms. It takes dedication to add your spin on that. Sometimes I wonder where she got her sense of style. When I was in fifth grade, people thought I was a boy.
She's creative and fits the scatterbrained-artist stereotype. She knows this about herself and spends a lot of time creating elaborate organizational systems. None of them include cleaning her room to find missing items.
My husband of 16 years is the patient patriarch of our brood. The poor guy just wants to watch a documentary in peace once in awhile. Instead, he ends up graciously offering opinions about nail polish colors and hair accessories. I am madly in love with this man.
And me, I used to be a science teacher who is now a stay-at-home mom. Sometimes, I forget myself and try to engage in conversations about cell processes and animal taxonomy. That scares people.
I am self-righteous about healthy eating unless I want a Peanut Butter Cup, or peanut butter M&Ms, or a brownie.
I often abandon my to-do list to go hiking or biking while the kids are at school.
I cannot fold fitted-sheets and I don't care.
I'm happy to be here.
Jaymi Anderson is married with two daughters. She is a stay at home mom. Read her regularly on Greeley Moms.


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I had written a big long reply about how I wanted to like the free dances a lot more than I actually did, but then I lost the entire thing!
So the highlights:
I/K - have star quality. I can see what all the fuss is about. They need to be careful they don't become just another cookie cutter Russian ice dance duo.
Shibutanis: I thought their FD was rather old-fashioned looking and didn't love it.
W/P: another program to an overwrought musical seemed stale. Give me something out of the box that shows why they are different than other teams.
D/W: I wanted desperately to love the programs but didn't. I thought the SD was dull. They did not maintain the intensity needed for the tango throughout the dance and it lacked sensuality between the partners. I agreed with CBC commentator Kurt Browning that Charlie's mop of curls did not look tango-ish. He needed to slick it back. This dance may be better as the season progresses because there is a lot of good choreography in it. This early, though, they are clearly thinking through it, and it really hurts the performance aspect.
While 8th may seem dreadful, they did not skate badly at all, though. The question is how high did you think they should have been placed? They certainly weren't as good as D/W, S/S, W/P, or I/K. I haven't watched the Reeds, or M/N yet, but here's what caused their placement:
1. They skated to a Disney cartoon movie score (despite the fact that it is darn good music) in suits that made it clear they were representing the 2 lions Simba & Nala, including a rubbing noses kiss (very cute). Unfortunately, this is not the way to cause the judges and other people to regard you as serious seniors. This will hit you in the PCS every time (and in fact, they were placed lower in PCS to M/N and R/R and C/L.
2. IMO, their best two lifts were the last 2 lifts, which were transitional lifts and so did not count (Sad but true) except towards PCS intangibles.
3. In front of the 2 noncounting lifts were 2 step sequences in which their edges were shallow, causing them to get level 2 on the circular step and level 1 on the diagonal step. This is a problem they can fix that doesn't show up that well to the casual fan. For a Level 4, all the turns must be done "correctly" and all the edges must be clear. If they're shallow, the tech group will cut you no slack. And IMO, this was a particularly tough tech panel. Plus the rules are tighter this year, too.
I can't tell you yet whether R/R and M/N should have been ahead of them. I need to watch the programs first.
Last edited by dorispulaski; 10-24-2010 at 01:24 PM.
No matter what type of tango it is, there should still be a sensuality and intensity and tension between the partners. Romance doesn't negate any of these things. In fact, a compelling romance requires all of the above. As to your further point about the film the music is from, I defy you to get the story of Il Postino from what they presented here, so I don't think it works on that level either.A couple of points about this program. It is not meant to be an Argentine tango. It is meant to be a romantic tango.
A good suggestion
Is it just me, or did Maia and Alex really grow up over the summer? They both look like the young adults that they are and not grade school children! So cool! I loved loved loved the simplicity of their free dance!
I never thought they were trying for a literal interpretation of the film, which was why I was surprised to see someone suggesting this as a reason for why it looks the way it does now. If you'll look back at my original post, you'll see that I state there's a lot of good choreography in the FD, but so far it lacks the presentation factor basically, just what you've suggested. I hope it does progress to fabulous by the end of the season. But it is not there yet.It's not supposed to be a literal translation of the movie. Meryl picked the Il Postino music and Charlie picked the tangos. According to Charlie it's about all the ups and downs of a romantic courtship. He charms her, they fall in love, they have issues, they resolve issues. Do think they are stilll just working through the program since they are almost 2 months behind in training over everyone else they are competing against. The basics are there. Let's see what the program looks like later in the season.
I loved the Shibs! I actually adore both their programs and they look wonderful together...Alex is such a strong, smooth ice dancer and presents Maia so well. With two clean programs they will be a factor in every competition they are in. To win the bronze here was amazing considering the very disruptive fall in the SD. I'm so thrilled for them.
Of course, I was very excited for D/W's debut and they didn't disappoint me! (But then they never do, ) I agree that their FD especially isn't quite there but wow, what difficulty and the potential for this to be an epic dance is there. I feel like I did for "Eleanor Rigby"...the first time out I could see it being great but was thrilled at the amazing FD it became by Nationals. This FD will work for them, it just needs more time and for them to get more comfortable with it so the expression can come through.
The other FD I really enjoyed was the British pair of C/B. I know it was a Disney song but I love "Lion King" and I thought their lifts and moves were wonderful. She's like a human pretzel! They may be a little unrefined but I had a good time watching that FD.
To me they already are. I look at their faces and all I see is that Russian intensity. They have a lot of Russian ice dance history to emulate and they are already trying to live up to the hype. If they just settle down and use their obvious talent, things could go well for them. I, personally, would rather see the team of Bobrova/Soloviev be the Russian #1 for a bit, I/K don't need the pressure yet...they are just out of juniors, for pete's sake. Much as I adored D/W in their first year of seniors, they weren't ready for the top spot in US ice dance. But they got there. Slow and sure wins the race.Originally Posted by rain


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LISBON - The big news coming of the Beaver Local Board of Education's meeting Monday evening was that of another meeting, which has been scheduled for next week.
District Superintendent Kent Polen announced that a long-awaited "town hall" meeting on the progress of the Beaver Local School building project will be held at 6:30 p.m., Wednesday, Feb. 20 in the high school auditorium. Polen says the presentation will include architectural drawings, showing the progression from the original rough concept shown in January 2012 to today's detailed schematics by Olsavsky Jaminet Architects.
Polen will also review the project timeline, which he says is currently four weeks ahead of schedule. "The way we've been doing the design process and working with the architects, we've been able to get the work done quicker than we thought," he said.
According to Polen, all surveying work has been completed, site core samples have been taken and tested, and the traffic study has been finished and turned in to the state. "I think people will be satisfied with where we are," he said.
The public is encouraged to attend, especially those involved with the building trades. "If there's anybody in the community that you know that wants to do business with the school and that project, that would be a good opportunity," board member Greg Eisenhart said.
During his report to the board, district treasurer Robert Barrett criticized a new school funding proposal from Governor John Kasich that would freeze state educational funding in most Columbiana County districts through fiscal year 2015.
As it stands, Barrett said the $8,750,148 that Beaver Local received from the state for fiscal year 2013 is already down 3.3 percent from the $9,048,759 that the district received four years ago. FY 2009 was used for comparison purposes, as it was last year in which district budgets were not augmented by Federal Stimulus and State Fiscal Stabilization Fund money from the American Recovery and Reinvestment Act of 2009.
Barrett said that, after subtracting funding from local property taxes, the state cuts result in $3,318 for the district to spend on each student in 2014, a drop of $506 from the $3,823 per student that was available in FY 2009.
Barrett's objections to the governor's budgetary proposals were not isolated to Beaver Local, however. Only three of the eleven county school districts, Salem, Wellsville and Columbiana Village, would receive budget increases over the next three years. Barrett said that, for school districts in an economically depressed county, this was unacceptable.
"Columbiana County is an Appalachian county," he said. "Most of the school districts are low poverty, and [the budgetary adjustments are] a bunch of zeroes."
Barrett believes that this new proposal is a non-starter because, in his opinion, it doesn't comply with the state Supreme Court's 1991 decision in the DeRolfe case, which found the property-tax-based method of education funding to be unconstitutional. "I'll keep the board informed as this progresses until June 30, when we know what our money is going to be," he said.
Following an executive session for personnel matters, board accepted the resignation of on-board instructor Debbie Bowersock, effective Jan. 29. Approved one-year contract for Shana Lawrence as a district bus driver, effective Jan. 10.
In other business:
* The board approved a three-year, $4,300 annual contract with Sammy L. Stamm and Co. accountants to assist with a state-mandated conversion from a cash-basis accounting system to a standardized GAAP (General Accepted Accounting Principals) system. Board member Pat O'Hara asked if the conversion was an unfunded mandate. "They're all unfunded mandates when it comes to state funding," Barrett replied.
* District has accepted its first share of state funding for construction of the new school in the amount of $897,772.40, which Barrett said will go towards the surveying, architectural, traffic study and other work undertaken so far.
* Board member Bill Croxall was absent and excused from meeting due to a family illness


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The EvoDeco single-spindle turning machine offers fully synchronous drives with acceleration/deceleration to reduce cycle times for parts that require a lot of stopping. The machine can be used with or without a guide bush.
The company also offers Almac milling machines and Esco by Tornos coil-fed turning machine lines. The complete Tornos/Almac product range includes horizontal milling machines with three or more axes, vertical milling machines, high speed machining centers and drilling machines.
Esco by Tornos turning centers accept coil stock in addition to barstock ranging to 12 mm in diameter. According to the company, coil stock requires less floor space and eliminates downtime caused by barstock change-over. It is also said to produce less scrap than barstock for parts in the Esco range. In Esco by Tornos machines, the cutting tools (mounted onto the spinning tool head) rotate around the material.


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If Apple wins the Australian case at the end of the main proceeding, all Android-based products will effectively be shut out of the Australian market forever, unless Google or its device maker partners settle with Apple. Therefore, Google and Samsung will have to fight very hard to have the asserted patents declared invalid, or at least have their scope narrowed.
Sources: The Sidney Morning Herald, City Press, Apple Insider, FOSS Patents
quote: The quickest and easiest way to halt all these legal cases is simple - company's like Samsung should stop copying Apple and stop including features that Apple has a patent on. Then all the lawyers go away. Magic.
quote: Some copying of trend setting designs is OK
quote: the obvious elephant in the room
quote: Sure, and Apple can remove the cellular antennae in their phones. Because Samsung spent billions in research and development on cellular technology and Apple is infringing on those patents. Then this all goes away. Magic :)
quote: Oh yeah? I'm sorry but is there a well defined "okay" limit for design-sharing that Apple can point to and say a line was crossed? No, it's entirely arbitrary.
quote: This isn't about designs or looks. It's about Apple who believes they "created" the smart phone and seeks to be the sole provider of said device. Even the most retarded fanboi can see that competition from other manufacturers pushes the iPhone to be better for end users. But nope, not you Tony. One phone to rule them all! How draconian.


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|Class Title:
|Breastfeeding Mothers Group - Bryn Mawr Hospital
|Selected Date:
|Thursday, October 6, 2016, from 2:00 PM to 3:00 PM
|Upcoming Dates:
Come join us for an opportunity to speak with other breastfeeding mothers, share your breastfeeding experiences, and check your baby's weight. At no cost to you, our internationally board-certified Lactation Consultants can provide personalized support and care including information about:
Terry Sanborn RN, IBCLC and Jillian Hatch RNC, IBCLC will be leading the discussions and a scale is provided to weigh babies.
There is no charge for the group and no reservations are necessary. Feel free to bring a beverage and a snack. Breastfeeding babies and their siblings are welcome. Please note, support groups do not meet on holidays. Call 1.866.CALL.MLH for weather cancellations, meeting dates, room locations or directions to the group meetings.
Note to newcomers: Please call ahead to confirm the meeting is occurring as scheduled.
You may also join our private members only facebook group: Bryn Mawr Breastfeeding Mothers Group. Click on the "Join Group" button and our administrator will review your request within 48 hours.
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A strike at Pennsylvania's 14 state-owned universities may be off the table.
After two days of marathon negotiations, the State System of Higher Education and the Association of Pennsylvania State College and University Faculties reached a deal Sunday, and agreed to the framework for a new contract, said officials.
"I didn't want to go on strike. I'd be inconveniencing my students. I don't want to do that," said Dan Spiegel, computer science professor and APSCUF-KU PR committee co-chair.
According to Spiegel, he is better served in a classroom than on the picket line.
"I came here specifically because my number one job was my students," said Spiegel.
Since June 2011, union members have been working without a contract at Pennsylvania's 14 state-owned universities, including Kutztown.
PASSHE and the union have been at odds, and a strike has been looming for months. Both sides are not releasing details about the new contract. The negotiations committee is set to vote on the agreement Monday night.
"I think it's better it's not going to happen, because if it did happen, it'd slow down my chance to graduate," said Treyvon Hall, a freshman at KU.
"I really feel like we would miss out on a lot of money because we'd be a whole semester behind," said Taylor Carney, who is happy the strike has most likely been averted.
The tentative deal will affect the 5,500 faculty members at the 14 state-owned universities and their 115,000 students.
"I'd like to continue my schooling without any more problems added on to my agenda," said Bram Wilusz, a junior at KU.
More details are expected to be made available as the ratification process continues.


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Tuesday Tales
Tuesday, November 26, 2013 | 10:00 am - 10:30 am
Stories, songs, finger plays, and more. Parents and caregivers can join in the fun. Drop in.Ages 3-6 with caregiver
10-10:30 a.m., Every Tuesday
Childrens Program Room
No Registration Required
MCPL Childrens Services
Contact Number:
(812) 349-3100
Christina Jones
- Event Type:
Main Library Children's Program
- Location:
Children's Program Room
Notify me about similar events


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Shea Butter Hand Repair Cream
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Show dry hands the door with this ultra-rich hand cream. Perfect for everyday revival, Shea Butter is the star along with a bouquet of botanical oils including Sesame, Borage, Macadamia, Rosehip and Sunflower. Get soft, beautifully moisturized hands anytime. All the time. A Burt's Bees customer favorite!
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Product Reviews
Shea Butter(Butyrospermum parkii) — A natural fat, Shea Butter comes from the fruit of the Karite tree. Moisture-rich and oh-so nourishing, it leaves your skin feeling soft and super supple. Helping reduce the appearance of fine lines and wrinkles and making a great anti-aging treatment...
aqua (water, eau), helianthus annuus (sunflower) seed oil, stearic acid, cera alba (beeswax, cire d'abeille), glycerin, sesamum indicum (sesame) seed oil, butyrospermum parkii (shea) butter, macadamia ternifolia seed oilrosa canina seed extract, theobroma cacao (cocoa) seed butter, parfum (fragrance)*, tocopherol, borago officinalis seed oil, rosmarinus officinalis (rosemary) leaf extract, alchemilla vulgaris extract calendula officinalis flower oil, plantago major leaf extract, glucose, salix nigra (willow) bark extract, beta-carotene, glycine soja (soybean) oil, canola oil (huile de colza), xanthan gum, sucrose stearate, sodium borate sodium chloride, glucose oxidase, lactoperoxidase, benzyl alcohol, citral, citronellol, eugenol, geraniol, limonene, linalool. *natural fragrance


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Top Definition
when a man take a condom. dips it in gas put it on and lights it on fire. Then puts it in a pussy or ass.
man, from all the scream and the smell of gas coming from john's room. He must be backdoor welding with jenny.
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The Cobbler's Dishrag Drawer
Dear Ann, It has come to this. My once-glorious dishrag drawer is faded and bedraggled. I first noticed the general lowering of the tone of my dishcloths quite a while ago, but I kept pushing aside such unthinkable thoughts. The fact is, I've not been in the dishcloth knitting mood for a while now. Then, recently, a visitor commented on the sad state of my also-once-glorious tea towels. I had to face it: I've let myself go. The tea...Read More


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Celebrity Central / Top 25 Celebs
Prince William
- 1981
Born into Royalty
Prince Charles, 32, marries Lady Diana Spencer, 20, in a lavish wedding at St. Paul's Cathedral with 750 million people tuning in worldwide. On June 21, 1982, the royals welcome their first son, His Royal Highness Prince William Arthur Philip Louis Windsor of Wales. The newborn is the second in line for the British throne following his father. Prince Charles tells PEOPLE of his son, "He has the good fortune not to look like me." Two years later, they welcome Prince Harry.
- 1983
Mother's Common Touch
Princess Diana displays a hands-on parenting approach uncommon among the royals and takes nine-month-old William along when she and Prince Charles make an official visit to Australia.
- 1990
Mama's Boy
As a young boy, William becomes his mother's closest confidant, "soul mate" and "chief comforter," according to Vanity Fair's Christopher Anderson in 2003. Anderson details an incident when 8-year-old William slips tissues under a bathroom door to his crying mother after she quarreled with Charles at Highgrove, the royal retreat in Gloucestershire.
- 1992
Di and Charles Separate
Weeks before William, 10, and Harry, 8, return to boarding school, Charles and Diana announce their separation. The boys split the remainder of their Christmas holiday between their feuding parents. Charles tells the BBC in 1994 that he never loved his princess bride, and Diana tells journalist Martin Bashir, "There were three of us in this marriage, so it was a bit crowded," referring to Charles' longtime love Camilla Parker Bowles. Throughout the marriage, Diana battled bulimia and depression, which she blames on Charles and the Royal Family's coldness.
- 1995
A Royal's Education
Diana tries to give her sons as normal an upbringing as possible. She rejects Charles' alma mater, a boarding school in Scotland, for Eton College, a prestigious public boarding school near London, where Diana's father and brother both attended. The Royal Family and the British press strike a deal: the royals will provide information on William once every term in exchange for his privacy. "Prince William is not an institution; nor a soap star; nor a football hero," Lord Wakeham, chairman of the Press Complaints Commission, says to the press. "He is a child: in the next few years, perhaps the most important and sometimes painful of his life, he will grow up and become a man."
Mother Knows Best
William and Harry hunt, fish, and go riding with their father. In their mother's company, they go to McDonald's and Disneyland, but also to AIDS clinics and homeless shelters. "I want them to have an understanding of people's emotions, of people's insecurities, of people's distress, of their hopes and dreams," she tells ABC's Martin Bashir in an interview.
- 1996
Terms of Divorce
After nearly 15 years of marriage, Charles and Diana's divorce is finalized. The royal exes agree to share custody of their sons, William, 14, and Harry, 11. In addition, the AP reports that Charles, 47, will pay Diana, 35, a lump sum of $26.35 million, and about $620,000 a year to run her private office. But the Princess loses the battle of keeping her title 'HRH' (Her Royal Highness), which is stripped from her. She will officially be known simply as Diana, Princess of Wales.
- 1997
Sequins Save Lives
William tells his mom she should auction her dresses to raise money for charity. Diana loves the idea, and Christie's New York sells a collection of 79 gowns from her closet worn from 1981 to 1996. A crowd of 1,100 shows up at the auction, raising a total of $5.76 million for AIDS and breast cancer charities. The dress Diana wore at a 1985 White House dinner where she danced with John Travolta fetches the highest bid of $222,500.
Diana, Princess of Wales (1961-1997)
Diana, 36, dies in a fatal car accident in Paris with her companion Dodi Fayed, heir to the owner of Harrods. The crash in the Place de l'Alma tunnel was the result of a 60-mph paparazzi car chase. Following her death, Prince Charles flies to Paris to bring her body to London for burial, and drapes the royal standard over her coffin, acknowledging in death her status as a member of the Royal Family. During this time Queen Elizabeth's silence is interpreted by the British press as indifferent and aloof. After a week of seclusion, the Queen returns with her grandsons from Balmoral Castle in Scotland to address the public.
Saying Farewell
The Queen breaks precedent to give Diana a royal funeral because she is the mother of the future king (According to the BBC, William says he intends to reinstate his mother's title when he is king). William, 15, and Harry, 12, walk behind their mother's coffin, while more than a million people line the route of Diana's funeral cortege. Earl Spencer uses his eulogy to criticize the media's hounding of his sister and Elton John sings a reworked version of his hit "Candle in the Wind."
Photo Credits
BIOGRAPHY (top to bottom): Tim Graham/Getty; Tim Graham/AP; Kim Knott/Retna; Lionel Cherruault/Sipa
- Name
- Prince William
- Real Name
- Prince William Arthur Philip Louis Windsor
- Date of Birth
- June 21, 1982
- Birth Place
- London, England
- Relationships
Kate Middleton, wife (2002 to present)
Arabella Musgrave, ex-girlfriend (June 2001 to October 2002)
- Children
- George Alexander Louis, son (7/22/2013)


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n. A legal seed that can be bought at Home Depot for cheap. Has similar effects to LSD when eaten.
He ate way too much morning glory seeds and threw up the hotdog he ate last night.
Beküldő: Skott 2004. szeptember 21.
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To awaken with a boner so hard a cat couldn't scratch it , otherwise known as to sleep in a tent, or to have a dawn horn.
Loose the morning glory before you put somebody's eye out
Beküldő: oxmix 2003. október 21.
When you wake up with morning wood, put it in your girlfriends ass and yell "the south will rise again!"
I gave her the morning glory this morning. She loves the confederates.
Beküldő: Scott Coleman 2008. április 2.
An erection caused by testosterone levels being high in the body during the early hours of the morning.
Man waking up with a mysterious erection.
Beküldő: Jimmy Tinker 2004. április 24.
an event where a person, hopefully male, awakes with a full erection.
"Rob always gets a morning glory"
Beküldő: i seek the truth! 2003. március 17.
The seeds of several varieties of Morning Glory (Ipomoea violacea) contain a naturally occurring tryptamine called Lysergic Acid Amide (LSA), which is closely related to LSD. Seeds are taken orally, and can be eaten whole or the active alkaloids can be extracted.
The most common active varieties of seeds are Heavenly Blue, Pearly Gates, and Flying Saucers. Like LSD, LSA acts as a "psychedelic" or "hallucinogen" which can have strong mental effects.
The most common active varieties of seeds are Heavenly Blue, Pearly Gates, and Flying Saucers. Like LSD, LSA acts as a "psychedelic" or "hallucinogen" which can have strong mental effects.
I didn't have any LSD so I orally ingested some Morning Glory seeds instead.
Beküldő: jiblair 2003. október 28.
1. LSA or 9,10-Didehydro-6-methylergoline-8ß-carboxamide or D-lysergic acid amide or LA-111.
2. To wake up with a 'hard-on'.
2. To wake up with a 'hard-on'.
1. "Know where I can get any Morning Glory seeds?"
2. "I've got 'Morning Glory'."
2. "I've got 'Morning Glory'."
Beküldő: Diego 2003. augusztus 31.
Waking up with a hard on
Morning hunnie, wanna sort out my morning glory?
Beküldő: Bandylank 2008. október 8.


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WOODBURY - Every two weeks, Esther Baker picks up her phone and sets out to cover what might be the smallest reporting beat in Pennsylvania.
And every two weeks, after the 87-year-old Baker puts her scoops on paper and leaves them in her mailbox, the Morrisons Cove Herald publishes her column, The Waterside News, a local journalistic institution now in its 56th year.
"It's the news: what everybody's doing, where everybody's been, what the kids are doing," said Donna Carbaugh, among the Bedford County village's estimated 90 residents and an occasional column source.
Article Photos
Mirror photo by Ryan Brown
Columnist Esther Baker sits with her old Smith-Corona Skywriter typewriter she once used to create her bi-weekly column for the Morrisons Cove Herald.
Somewhere between personal reflection and small-town society column, Baker's section - usually occupying just a few column inches in the weekly Herald - opens with a Biblical poem or phrase before detailing the daily activities of Waterside's populace.
"Earl and Janis Slick had dinner on Easter with Clint, Lynne Isaiah and Grace Burke," reads a passage in the April 11 edition. "The Helsels had a birthday dinner on Sunday for Luke Wiedemann, who just turned 11."
Baker, not a trained reporter but surely among the longest-running journalists actively covering central Pennsylvania, has worked through near-unimaginable personal tragedy to deliver information to a tiny but loyal readership.
"I just try to write the news," Baker said last week at the farmhouse where she's lived for decades. "And of course, I include some about Esther and family."
Raised in the Cove by a farming family, Baker took jobs as a bookkeeper, secretary and post office clerk before marrying her husband, Bob, in 1947. Her family struggled, losing their first house to a fire and fighting to make ends meet.
"That was mighty hard, when you have no money. No place to call a home," she said. "I learned to live with what I had or do without."
In 1959, her son Roger, aged 5, seriously injured his eye in a household accident. A local doctor urged immediate surgery at what was then Mercy Hospital in Altoona, Baker said.
A surgeon emerged from the operating room, only to tell Baker that her son had died. It was the day after Thanksgiving.
Complications - easily preventable, in Baker's words - were the cause.
"We just lost, lost and we didn't have anything left to lose. Except debt," she said.
Told in 1956 that the Herald's Waterside correspondent had quit, Baker took up the job at 5 cents per column inch. Her only literary background came from her father, who for years had penned religious and family-themed poems and articles with ease.
After spending years writing for free to pay off a farm-machinery ad her family had taken out in the Herald, Baker asked her editors for a raise. She got one: They doubled her pay to 10 cents an inch, where it remains today.
"I make a lot of calls for the pittance I get," she said with a laugh. "I probably spend four to five hours making calls, call-backs and trying to put it together."
It's the same procedure every two weeks: Baker calls her Waterside neighbors, collecting news on family visits and dinner parties, health updates and the occasional birthday.
She selects a religious note, often gleaned from her Seventh Day Baptist church bulletin, then puts the column on paper. She doesn't use a computer and has abandoned even the old Smith-Corona Skywriter typewriter she once employed.
"I couldn't get the tape I needed, so now it just sits there," Baker said.
Instead, she writes the column by hand, then leaves it in her mailbox for a Herald employee to grab on the way to work.
"If I paid the postage to send it, I wouldn't have many cents left," she said.
Placed in the Herald's "B" section under her name, the title "Correspondent" and her home phone number, Baker's column receives infrequent but passionate feedback. She recalled acquaintances begging her not to cancel the column - in many ways the last of its kind, Morrisons Cove Herald Assistant Editor Brian Hess said last week.
"We used to have columnists, over the years, cover the New Enterprise area and Claysburg, maybe Curryville. ... It was like 'who visited who,' events that were coming up - nothing negative," Hess said. "I believe she's the only one still writing a column about one of the small towns."
On the off-chance the editors forget to include the Waterside News one week, they can expect complaints from Baker's most loyal readers, he said.
As the years passed, her column switched from every week to every other week as fewer sources kept in touch.
"I'm the oldest person around here. Which means that most of my patrons, so to speak, are gone long ago," Baker said.
Baker kept writing even after her husband's death and a second family tragedy. In 2001, her son Wayne, a nurse at Nason Hospital, was killed by a piece of farm equipment on the land where his mother still lives. He was 50 years old.
Wayne was beloved by his Nason coworkers - who fought to keep him alive, Baker said, a tear in her eye.
Burying two sons and fighting to provide for two daughters (Anita Jubas and Sara Hayashi-Kavanagh) both now grown, left Baker with one rule for her column: No crime coverage or horrific news stories.
"No, I don't do any of those. I can't take that," she said. "I've had enough of the terrible incidents."
Instead, Baker uses her column to offer prayers for ill readers, sympathy to those who've lost relatives and happy stories about visits with her family, whose photographs cover her walls and fill stacks of albums.
Among her albums are yellowing news clippings: notes on the Southern Cove Volunteer Fire Company, for whom she volunteers, and a curious Herald story about Baker's violent struggles with snakes outside her home. In her spare time, she tends a garden and personally combats weeds, despite an aching back.
"Of course, my little bit of writing is part of my existence. It keeps me a part of the community - involved," she said.
Asked whether she has any plans to retire from journalism, Baker demurred.
"I don't have any plans to," she said. "I'll let the Lord decide it."
Mirror Staff Writer Ryan Brown is at 946-7457.


text:
on December 28, 2012 - 12:20 PM
More shovelers are needed today and Saturday to help clear the snow at Ralph Wilson Stadium.
The job pays $10 an hour.
Those who are 17 or older should show up at gates 7 and 8 if interested in the job. Photo identification is required.
The team recommends dressing appropriately for winter weather conditions.
For more information, call Jani King at 983-7096.


text:
BRISTOLVILLE - The hardest thing to do for a basketball team that isn't participating in a celebratory cutting of the nets is to watch.
The team can seek shelter in the locker room, but the walls are never thick enough to keep the sound from entering. With each cut of a string comes another cheer that is a reminder that the other team is enjoying something special.
The Bristol Panthers had that sinking feeling after a loss to the Mathews Mustangs late last season. Watching the Mustangs cut down the nets after clinching the Northeastern Athletic Conference title, the Panthers vowed to make sure a ladder was available when they clinched the NAC crown this season.
Article Photos
Tribune Chronicle / R. Michael Semple
Bristol's Aaron Wiebe (21) holds up a piece of the net and celebrates Bristol's undefeated home-court record with his teammates after defeating Mathews, 87-61.
Bristol's Chad Oliver (12)?makes a strong move to the basket as Mathews' Wyatt Ford (5) defends during first-quarter action.
That moment came after a 43-point 9
"Last year we went to Mathews and they won it, and they cut down the nets," Panthers coach Craig Giesy said. "It's something we talked about all summer long. When Mathews comes to our place, we want to have that feeling. We want to cut down the nets.
"It's something the boys did tonight. They came out with a lot of intensity, especially Oliver, and got a win for us."
The Panthers (21-0 and 13-0 in the NAC) can clinch an undefeated record with a win Tuesday at Southington. The Mustangs are 8-13 and 5-7 in the NAC.
Oliver put on a show, breaking the homecourt scoring record he set last Saturday with 41 points against Geneva. Oliver was in a zone, doing most of his damage on drives to the basket. He made 15 field goals and was 11-of-12 at the foul line.
Giesy removed Oliver with 3:54 remaining in the fourth quarter. Had Oliver continued playing, he might have reached the 50-point plateau.
"The last (home) game and I wanted to leave everything out here on the court," Oliver said. "I have to thank my teammates because without them we wouldn't be where we are."
The performance came on what turned into a special Senior Night. The best part came when Oliver took his turn going up the ladder with scissors in hand.
"That's been our goal all year," Oliver said. "It definitely motivated us from what we saw last year with them cutting down the nets. We got a chance to do the same tonight. It's a really great feeling."
The Panthers thrived off defensive pressure and scored throughout in transition. Giesy was able to use 14 players, with nine denting the scoring column. Brandon Lee, Zeth Tomasiak, Zak Dibell and Aaron Wiebe each produced nine points.
"We challenge them to play hard every game," Giesy said. "We run a big rotation, and they know if they don't get those 50/50 balls they're not playing. When they go on the floor they know they have to give 100 percent. At the same time they know they're going to come out in two or three minutes and get a spell."
The Mustangs bounced back from deficits of 9-0 and 16-4 to trail by seven, 22-15, after the first quarter. Oliver had 13 points in the period.
The Panthers slowly pulled away in the second period, stretching their lead to 45-32 at halftime. Bristol led 63-49 though three periods.
"I'd like to say that's not the best basketball team I've ever seen, but by far that's a team that puts everything on the court every game," Mustangs coach Jason Lee said. "They're up 20 and they have kids diving. That's a credit to their coaching staff and every player on their bench. I've never seen anything like that."
Andy Morgan scored 17 points and grabbed 10 rebounds for Mathews. Aaron Suchanek had 11 points and Wyatt Ford added 10.
The Panthers have a combined 20-2 home record the last two seasons. All Giesy had to do was look into the stands to begin handing out thanks.
"A big credit to our fans," Giesy said. "It's loud in here every night. They come out and support us. They give us homecourt advantage every time we play here."


text:
Cubs & Giants Kiss Their Sisters at Fitch Park
Seven Cub pitchers combined to throw a five-hitter, as the EXST Cubs and EXST Giants played to a 1-1 12-inning tie before a Memorial Day Weekend packed house at Fitch Park Field #3 in Mesa this morning.
Skies remained overcast and game-time temperatures were in the low 80's after an all-night rain Thursday into Friday, as the two teams took the field for an early (9 AM) first-pitch.
2008 17h round draft pick RHP Jon Nagel got the start for the Cubs and threw three perfect innings. An EXTREME ground ball pitcher (and a good ol' country boy from the Ozarks), Nagel (as usual) pounded the bottom of the strike zone with a hard sinker, getting most-all of the opposition hitters to either strike out, or chop the ball into the ground in front of home plate.
Now 22, Nagel (6'4 230+) was drafted by the Cubs despite undergoing Tommy John elbow ligament transplant surgery prior to last June's draft, and it looks like the Cubs made an astute selection. He spent last summer rehabbing at Fitch Park before finally making his on-field debut this season, and he looks like he could pitch at Peoria right now. He has all the ear-marks of a rotation horse. .
Recently demoted RHP Josh Whitlock (2008 26th round pick out of U. of West Virginia) threw two inings of shutout ball in relief of Nagel, and looked much better than he did last Monday when he made his first appearance for the EXST Cubs after getting sent down from Peoria a week ago.
20-year old Venezuelan RHP Robert Hernandez (at Fitch Park rehabing from a spriained ankle suffered the last week of Minor League Camp) also threw two innings of shutout ball this morning, and appears ready to move up and out of Fitch Park whenever there is a roster opening at Daytona or Peoria. He has pitched very well every time out (so far). Hernandez went 2-4 with a 5.14 ERA in 17 games (15 starts) at Peoria in 2008, after missing the first two months of the season while serving a 50-game PED suspension.
21-year old LHP Melvin Vasquez (signed last August by Cubs chief Dominican scout Jose Serra) worked the next two innings, and although he blew the save by allowing a single and an RBI double in the top off the 9th, the little lefty also struck out four.
20-year olld lanky Dominican RHP George Pineda, LHP Ryan Sontag (2008 23rd round pick out of Arizona State who is being converted from OF to pitcher at EXST), and 18-year old Australian RHP Adam Spencer each threw one inning of shutout, hitless ball in the extra frames.
While the Cubs pitchers were shutting down the Giants, the Cubs bats were mostly silent, the only run scoring in the bottom of the 3rd when 18-year old Korean bonus baby Hak-Ju Lee lined a single into right-center after speedy (but normally light-hitting) Robert Bautista laced a two-out triple into the RF corner. The Cubs might have scored more runs in the inning, but lumbering Jericho Jones was thrown out trying to stretch a sure-thing double into a highly-speculative AIG triple after smashing a near-HR off the "green monster" batter's eye in dead CF.
Hak-Ju Lee, who had been limited to DH duty while rehabbing from 2008 Tommy John surgery, played shortstop for five innings today, and handled five chances hit his way seemlessly, making strong throws to 1st base each time. He showed no ill effects from the TJS.
While Lee played only five innings, other Cubs position players moved around the field like a game of musical chairs throughout the contest, allowing several players to get PT at more than one position.
In EXST Cubs roster news, RHP Marco Carrillo has been assigned to Daytona after completing his rehab at Fitch Park.
Here is today's abridged box score (Cubs players only):
1a. Hak-Ju Lee, SS: 1-2 (4-3, 1B - 1 RBI)
1b. Jose Guevara, C: 0-2 (BB, K, K)
2. Jose Valdez, CF-DH-RF: 2-4 (1B, 4-3, 4-3, 1B - 1 SB, 1 CS, 1 PO)
3a. Matt Cerda, C-2B: 1-3 (1B, K, F-9)
3b. Logan Watkins, 2B: 0-1 (K)
4. Sean Hoorelbeke, LF-DH-1B: 0-4 (F-8, 5-3, K, K)
5. Jae-Hoon Ha, RF-CF-DH: 0-4 (4-3, 1-3, F-8, K)
6. Chris Weimer, DH-1B-LF: 0-4 (4-3, F-8, 5-3, L-7)
7. Kevin Soto, DH-RF-CF: 0-4 (6-3, 5-3, F-7, K)
8. George Matheus, 2B-3B: 0-4 (F-8, 6-3, 4-3, K)
9a. Jericho Jones, 1B-LF-DH: 2-4 (2B, K, 6-3, 1B)
9b. Jose Made, PR: 0-0
10. Robert Bautista, 3B-SS: 1-4 (3B, 4-3, K, 6-4 FC - 1 R)
1. Jon Nagel - 3.0 IP, 0 H, 0 R, 0 BB, 2 K, 6/1 GO/FO
2. Josh Whitlock - 2.0 IP, 1 H, 0 R, 1 BB, 2 K, 2/2 GO/FO
3. Robert Hernandez - 2.0 IP, 2 H, 0 R, 0 BB, 2 K, 0/4 GO/FO
4. Melvin Vasquez - 2.0 IP, 2 H, 1 R (1 ER), 0 BB, 4 K, 2/0 GO/FO
5. George Pineda - 1.0 IP, 0 H, 0 R, 0 BB, 1 K, 0/2 GO/FO
6. Ryan Sontag - 1.0 IP, 0 H, 0 R, 0 BB, 2 K, 0/1 GO/FO
7. Adam Spencer - 1.0 IP, 0 H, 0 R, 1 BB, 0 K, 2/1 GO/FO
Jose Guevara - 1 PB
Re: Cubs & Giants Kiss Their Sisters at Fitch Park
I sthere ay realistic chance we could get DeRosa back? I'm not kidding. It's not even his (righty-bad) bat, it;s the clubhouse atmosphere which seems morguelike. Bad trades Hendry. Miles? really?
Re: Cubs & Giants Kiss Their Sisters at Fitch Park
it;s the clubhouse atmosphere which seems morguelike
How do you know what the atmosphere is in the clubhouse?
Re: Cubs & Giants Kiss Their Sisters at Fitch Park
How did Hak-Ju Lee move when he was playing short? Does he look like a guy who can stay there?
Re: Cubs & Giants Kiss Their Sisters at Fitch Park
Oops let me retry. I'm not even drunk yet. Is there any realistic chance we could get Derosa? I plan on being drunk, drunker if the Cubs blow this game. Actually who am I kidding? Drunker if they actually win. F-this losing crap.Fixed.
Re: Cubs & Giants Kiss Their Sisters at Fitch Park
Awesome reports, thanks. I would be really great if the Cubs could develop some all-star quality position players, in addition to their $150 million payroll.
I have to wonder if Cerda will ever develop that sort of power needed to play corner OF, though. He's really small, isn't he? Is the 5'9" I see him listed at accurate? Even Giles is listed at 5'10".
Re: Cubs & Giants Kiss Their Sisters at Fitch Park
Wow ! A crowd of 21 fans today ! It must've had something to do with the cooldown in temperatures the last two days.Jericho Jones double off the centerfield green monster on field #3 would've been a homerun in any minor league ball park.I bet he's tired of hitting the ball off the walls & fences at Fitch.He may seem like he's "lumbering" when he's running the bases but he is actually covering a lot of real estate with each "lumbering" stride.I think the coaches purposely try to stretch the defenses and are sending the runners to force throwing errors.
Theriot, Fukudome, Bradley, Lee, Hoffpauir, Soto, Fontenot, Scales, Wells
Gwynn Jr., E. Gonzalez, A. Gonzalez, Hairston, Giles, Kouzmanoff, Hundley, Burke, Geer
at least they finally get a shitty pitcher...
Re: Lineup...
Is Sca!es really a better option than Miles or Freel?
Sca!es is quickly going to become Neif!. Neif!'s good month gave him playing time with the Cubs for two (?) years. Sca!es good first week is going to give him way too much playing time this year.
Re: Lineup...
Scales is Neifi? He's been in one game this month he hasn't been on base and his May OPS is .934.
Neifi's career OPS was .672.
Making statements on small statistical samples would have doomed Ryne Sandberg.
Can we wait till Scales' OPS touches, oh, .800 or so before making Neifi comparisons?
Re: Lineup...
Making statements on small statistical samples would have doomed Ryne Sandberg.
When Bobby Scales becomes a highly touted 22-year old prospect, then you can start making Sandberg comparisons. Further... you are the one making the statement on a small sample size, not me. If I were making a statement on a small sample size, I would be praising the guy. Instead I am looking at his very large sample size of 11 minor league seasons of mediocre numbers.
My point is that Neifi had a great month or so, and it "earned" him way too much playing time. And I am hoping that the same thing doesn't happen with Scales.
Re: Lineup...
Lou and Ryno probably are coming to realize that goose is cooked. Unfortunately when they look in the yard the only other fowl available are Miles and Freel.
Re: Cubs & Giants Kiss Their Sisters at Fitch Park
cubs were in the dugout wearing rally caps in the top 2nd...pretty much everyone inside out and worn "cap-bill mohawk" style.
dlee hits a homer to lead off the 2nd and the dugout turns into 8 year olds.
Re: Cubs & Giants Kiss Their Sisters at Fitch Park
i would be all for freel starting five six in a row at third
lets see if he has anything left.
Re: Cubs & Giants Kiss Their Sisters at Fitch Park
Re: Cubs & Giants Kiss Their Sisters at Fitch Park
rough week...
Re: Cubs & Giants Kiss Their Sisters at Fitch Park
Actual phone conversation with my not very knowledgeable significant other from about 36 seconds ago:
Her: "Did the Cubs play today?"
Me: "Yes"
Her: "Did they win?"
Me: "No"
Her: "Wow. Again? They aren't winning very much right now. When does Harden pitch? He's good, right?"
Me: "You better find somewhere else to sleep tonight."
Re: Cubs & Giants Kiss Their Sisters at Fitch Park
Anyone seen Nomar play this year? I imagine he can be had for a marginal prospect.
Recent comments
Hopefully Pirates don't call up A. Lincoln.
j.buchanan going friday...should be...baseball...or something like it.
Wow. I didn't know they could do that.
Nice for Willson, not so much for Addy.
Game is officially called...also officially a tie.
Stats count, no make-up date of course.
Yeah -- seeing the weather -- I hope KB and Rizz are inside, wrapped in blankets and drinking hot chocolate.
rain delay...thanks obama.
Thanks again Phil. We actually were in Mesa and drove around. Hopefully, I am back for some Fall League. If not I have all of spring training (like the smart people who move here!)
What Rob G said. I can't speak for Piittsburgh, but the other end of the state has had absolute crap weather for two days. Perfect day to take it easy.
tarp came off 10 minutes ago...let's do this.
He will not pitch another game for Cubs
/Unless injury in playoffs
Today is bullpen day
10/450 if they win WS
Carrie Muskat [email protected]
Even though Hammel is missing start, don't assume he'll not be on #Cubs postseason roster. Maddon says elbow problem isn't that bad
Carrie Muskat [email protected]
Maddon on #Cubs postseason rotation: "I don't want to announce anything. We haven't talked to anybody yet"
Carrie Muskat [email protected]
Maddon hopes Soler can take BP in Cincy, play in sim game Tue. "All of that should give us some kind of indication of where he's at"
tarp on the field 40 minutes before gametime...meh.
travel day + rain in Pittsburgh. Why risk injury?


text:
Introduction to Gender Studies
Establishes a conceptual foundation for the GNDR minor by providing students
with a broad-based understanding and analysis of gender and gender studies.
Addresses issues relating to race, sexual orientation, class, multiculturalism,
and men's and women's studies. (This class is a strongly suggested prerequisite
for all other GNDR courses.)
Human Sexuality
Students explore issues of maleness and femaleness. Emphasis is placed
on identifying and evaluating value systems relating to sexuality. The
impact of cultural definitions on individual behavior is also examined.
Attention is directed toward societal ramifications of shifting roles
with the intention of evaluating new alternatives open to men and women.
A final emphasis is placed on understanding sexual functioning and different
means of sexual expression. Suggested prerequisite: GNDR 100.
Special Topics
Presents a number of special topics allowing students to explore a wide
range of issues relevant to gender studies. Suggested prerequisite: GNDR
100. See list below for sample courses.
Psychology of Women
An overview of major theories of women's development, applications of
feminist theory, gender-related research, and women's health issues across
the life span. Psychological issues important to women during childhood,
adolescence, adulthood, and old age, such as gender role acquisition,
pay inequities in the work force, adjustment to menopause, and violence
against women, are discussed. Focus is given to research on women in relation
to diverse socioeconomic classes, ethnic backgrounds and culture. Prerequisite:
PSYC 105 or SOC 105. Suggested prerequisite: GNDR 100.
Gender in Society
Examines the socio-cultural construction of gender in the United States
with some cross-cultural comparisons. It makes generalizations about the
different experiences of women and men in this society. It also looks
at class, religious, and ethnic differences within the two genders. They
are then compared with those from other societies and how they are related
to the wider culture. Suggested prerequisite: GNDR 100.
Senior Project/Thesis
Serves as the capstone course for the GNDR minor. Students undertake
self-directed project or thesis that integrates concepts learned in gender
studies courses with those learned in the student's major area of study.
Project completed with a supervisory committee of two (at least one must
be a gender studies faculty member). Prerequisite: completion of 20 hours
of GNDR courses including GNDR 100.
Note: Students whose major requires a senior project or thesis
will not be expected to complete a second project or thesis. One thesis
or project can count for both a major requirement and a gender studies
requirement if students (1) select topics relevant to both gender studies
and their majors and (2) work with a faculty advisor who teaches gender
studies courses.
Courses offered as GNDR 300 will vary from year to year. The following is a
list of sample courses that indicate the kinds of courses that may be offered
as GNDR 300.
Women in European and American Art History
Although they were written out of the canon in the eighteenth and nineteenth
centuries, female artists have contributed significantly to various schools
and art movements through their work, their personal relationships and
the students they influenced. Recent scholarship has revealed the lives,
times, and works of women in arts, and has questioned the methods by which
great art is measured, creating a significantly wider range of study for
the student of art history than can be covered in the traditional course
of study. Suggested prerequisite: GNDR 100.
Introduction to Great Women Writers
Explores some of the difficulties encountered by women who write fiction,
and helps students develop an awareness of how women in fiction reflect
women's roles in the middle-class, past and present. The course explores
aspects of feminist criticism and gives students of serious literature
insights that differ from traditional views. Suggested prerequisite: GNDR
Medieval Women Writers
Explores the literature by and about female authors of the Middle Ages.
Students read a variety of texts in translation by medieval women-women
who lived in various parts of Western Europe, but nevertheless documented
similar experiences. Suggested prerequisite: GNDR 100.
American Women's History
An overview of the economic, social, and political roles women have played
in American history, from the colonial period to today. Investigates women's
work in the household and market economies, women and the family, and
women's legal and civil rights and liabilities across time. Suggested
prerequisite: GNDR 100.
The Forgotten Women of Math and Philosophy
Introduces students to the writing, work, and importance of some women
in mathematics, science, and philosophy, from ancient Greeks through more
recent times. Suggested prerequisite: GNDR 100.
Complementary Health for Men and Women
Explores health promotion and wellness for men and women in the context
of holism and complementary alternative health care strategies. This course
describes the use of complementary medicine and healing strategies to
accomplish physical-mental-spiritual health and wellness for men and women.
Traditional Chinese medicine, Chi-Kong, energy healing, meditation, herbal
remedies, spiritual approaches, nutrition and other complementary modalities
will be introduced and practiced. Suggested prerequisite: GNDR 100.
Feminist Issues in Ethics
Examines the basic concerns and theories of feminist ethics within the
context of traditional masculine-oriented western ethical theory. May
include a study of the conceptual and moral relationship between feminist
ethics and issues such as justice, social policy, or the parallel development
of recently proposed environmental ethical theories. May also focus on
ethical issues raised by new sciences and technologies, and historical
accounts of women's ethical/moral values. Suggested prerequisite: GNDR
100 and/or PHIL 100.
Jewish and Christian Feminist Theology
Examines recent Jewish and Christian feminists; critical analyses of
traditional models for understanding the relationship of God and "man"/humans.
Includes an evaluation of the role that newly constructed Jewish and Christian
feminist theologies may play in the development of a truly pluralist conception
of religious truth as the way to salvation. Suggested prerequisite: GNDR
Feminist Epistemology
Examines feminist critiques of knowledge and knowledge seeking. Focusing
on critiques of traditional notions of objectivity, the scientific method,
and the nature of knowledge, students explore how and why aspects of race,
sex, and ethnicity are relevant to knowledge seeking. Suggested prerequisite:
Mothers and Sons: A Developmental Perspective
Looks at the developmental significance of the mother-son relationship.
From the assigned readings, features speakers and films, selected novel,
and classroom discussion, students will explore the mother-son relationship
(and vice-versa) throughout the lifespan. Suggested prerequisite: GNDR
Queer Theory
Explores the field of queer theory, which has only been in existence
since 1990. It is perhaps the most politicized of current cultural theories
because of its implications for daily life: homophobia continues to be
a very real problem in our society. Through readings of 19th and 20th
century texts and films, we will trace changes in attitudes toward various
forms of sexuality, focusing on how subjects constitute themselves as