text:
This actually sounds like one of the steps in Alcoholics/Narcotics Anonymous. After you make a "fearless moral inventory of yourself", you make a list of what you did wrong and to whom, then you have to go and "make amends" to them. It's pretty much a requirement, unless it could do more damage than good. And they seriously believe that those kind of skeletons are the things that keep addicts using.
I'm with Dan on this. Can't we Americans be more a little more European about these matters?
Or, she could have told him that she cheated and withheld the name of the other man.
Actually, step 8 is: Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others.
And, this is great example of where someone should have kept their yam trap shut.
You really don't need to tell your spousal unit that you diddled their kid sibling on your wedding night...that's why god created I, Anonymous.
Newsom sounds like a perfect Republican presidential candidate.
Or the media could stop talking about it so that the whole thing can blow over, Newsom is a fantastic leader, let's let it go already. Clinton was skewered for less, and to what end? Let it lie.
I totally agree, telling your spouse about an old affair does no good.
I don't know anyone in recovery who would advocate telling the husband under these circumstances. (Assuming we know most of the story). The step that addresses amends is the 9th step and as #4 says, it has a very clear about the exception.
Caroline @1
There are no requirements for NA or AA. And I don't believe that there is any certain "thing" that keeps addicts from stopping.
Ignorance certainly is bliss, but if I had devoted my life/career to a guy who cheated with my partner, I'd want to know about it. So I could quit.
Tourk may be out of a job, but wouldn't you rather be unemployed than working for someone who would pull such an underhanded, two-faced move on you?
Maybe I'm just being contrarian, but I think Tourk has a right to know that his best friend and wife are shits. He could have chosen to forgive him, or her, or both, and kept his undoubtedly well-salaried position, but it seems he'd rather start clean and hopefully find someone who'll think more of him than to boff his boss. I wish him luck--it's got to be hard to take, losing two important people in your life to something like this.
And while I admire Newsom's politics most of the time, the timing of his gay marriage move a few elections ago did more to galvanize the GOP's religious base than all their TV commercials combined. This consensual hetero slip may not matter too much in the polls--at least I hope it won't. But the kind of guy who'd have sex with his best friend's wife isn't my first choice for elected office, regardless of his party affiliation. I thought adultery was dumb when Clinton did it and I thought it was dumb when Gingrich did it, and neither of those guys did it with their best friend's wife.
For once, I agree with Dan, to the max.
The old saying about lie, lie, lie - has great pieces of truth when it come to discussing the expectation of fidelity.
I have an ex of long duration - we are good friends, amicable mutual separation and divorce, have a couple of kids in common - but if I had ever told the whole truth - what a hell would have ensued.
For once, I agree with Dan, to the max.
The old saying about lie, lie, lie - has great pieces of truth when it come to discussing the expectation of fidelity.
I have an ex of long duration - we are good friends, amicable mutual separation and divorce, have a couple of kids in common - but if I had ever told the whole truth - what a hell would have ensued.
I stand corrected, Sober 10 Years @7. Didn't know exactly what it was all about, but was pretty sure she's doing that 8th step.
hmm i'd really love to be married to dan savage. or work for him.
Caroline @12--yes, I agree. She was probably doing the steps, but in my opinion she was doing them in a pretty fucked up way.
"Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would harm them or others." (I think it's actually "harmed" not "injured" as in 7 above)
Those doing the steps are not supposed to make amends just to unburden themselves at the expense of others. The step says "amends" meaning "to make up for." Which in most cases involves some kind of apology and request for forgiveness and offer to make it up if possible. This is easiest with theft, much harder with betrayal.
Of course, we don't really know what happened here.
Me @ 15 stupid me, it is "injure".
Step #9 Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others.
yeah I screwed up on the step #, it is 9 as sober 10 yrs says and not 8 (apologies to those I may have harmed)...but I quoted directly from an AA website...maybe I just got a site that's been updated for the age of harm reduction...harm being a litte more encompassing than injure.
Dan is completely right. Former cheaters should STFU.
Is it just me, or does it seem like it's mostly women who do this "cheat on someone and then tell them" thing?
Rippey-Tourk could have sucked up the guilt, committed herself to staying faithful in the future, and allowed her poor husband to go to his grave believing that he didnt marry the kind of woman that would do that to him. Instead Mrs. Rippey-Tourk unburdened herself and in the process shifted all of the burden on to Mr. Tourk.
Heres a fun thought experiment. Extrapolate this relationship to the relationship we have with our own government. Specifically, apply it to the domestic spying program the Bush administration perpetrated on the American public. Not entirely dissimilar, right? One party fucks the other over in secret, terribly violating their covenant with the other. And what if they hadnt been caught by a leak to the New York Times, but were living with this secret? Whats best to do? What if, in a (decidedly uncharacteristic) fit of self-examination (pause for laughter) they considered coming clean? Is this a good argument:
The administration could have sucked its guilt, committed itself to keeping the public trust in the future, and allowed its poor constituency to go to their graves believing that they didnt elect the kind of administration that would do that to them. Instead the administration unburdened itself and in the process shifted all of the burden on to the public.
Im stretching, beyond belief, the abilities of our current administration to question its own actions to make a point. We endlessly rail against deceit by our government, corporations, et al.why then do we allow ourselves little Faustian bargains to preserve the relationships weve entered on an interpersonal level? It seems to me that if we imagine ourselves to be principled individuals, that we have a duty to adhere to those principals if we expect adherence in return.
And, alright, maybe its Pollyannaish and naive to force a parallel between a marriage and the Greater Social Contract. Then consider this: In Dans model, where the cheater maintains silence in order to protect the greater good of the relationship, the cheater dictates their own consequences. They done their partner wrong, so they will carry their burden of guilt, and never reveal their transgression to their significant other. In doing so, they act as their own moral arbiter, doling out their own punishment of nobly carrying this burden and sparing their wronged loved one the messy emotions of hurt and confusion, like a parent who tells their child that old Sandy has been sent to a farm where she can run in the fields and chase rabbits and not euthanized on a vets table to spare her from crippling arthritis. It seems to me this punishment carries with it its own mitigation. The cheater is assuaged by occupying their own, self-generated moral high ground. What noblesse! What sacrifice!
What bullshit. Not only can the cheater transgress, but the cheater gets away with it scot-free under the guise of self-sacrifice, and never faces any real consequences for their actions. No, if Rippey-Tourk betrayed the most sacred trust she had with her husband, it no longer lies with her to decide the ramifications of that violation, as she is clearly unfit to make that decision by virtue of her lack of virtue. Everybody is an adult in this situation, and the adult thing for her to do is take her fucking lumps, cede the moral high ground to her husband, and let him decide the course ahead, be it reconciliation or otherwise. Fuck bemoaning the shifting of the burden to Mr. Tourk, in an honest relationship, it was always his to bear. Fair? No. Honest? Most assuredly.
A final fallacy:
Gavin Newsom will survive this scandal Mrs. Rippey-Tourk will be forever seen as the victim of a caddish man and an unnamed abusable substance. But Mr. Tourk? Hes always going to be that poor dude whose best friend banged his wife.
Wrong. Mr. Newsom will be seen as the caddish man, Mrs. Rippey-Tourk will be seen as the victim of her personal inability to remain faithful, and Mr. Tourk is going to be that guy who was tragically shit upon by the two people he trusted most in his life. Theres no need to make it worse by posthumously wishing Mrs. Rippey-Tourk would have compounded her weakness with blatant cowardice, and relegating Mr. Tourk to the role of cuckold AND fool.
Stephen in Chicago:
You get my award for the most dumb-fool post I've read in the last 3 days.
The basic idea is that most people feel very burdened by their bad acts. There is a lot of relief to be felt by confessing the bad acts, especially if one has a system for living set up that rewards you for such confessions while at the same time supporting you through any fall-out, for example Alcoholics Anonymous.
However, realizing the relief of one's confession to the harmed party doesn't do any cosmic good if your relief just causes more harm to that party than it does healing. This calculus holds for 3rd parties as well. In these situations the confession is pure selfishness.
I know there is a lot of cynicism (and misunderstanding) about the 12 steps here at the STranger, but the program was developed above all else to be practical and to move the "recovering" person away from a self-centered life of rampaging and spreading chaos in the life of those around them. The program was not developed to turn the participants into militant morality police or into unthinking fodder for hard line morality police.
I fail to see any connection to George Bush, except that he owes an apology to the American people for all his bad acts and stupidity. I cant see how his making such an apology would harm me or anyone else. As I heard an old AA guy say once, "If you got a problem with stealing, well stop fucking stealing." Whatever we think of Ms. Rippey-Tourk, I assume she was intending not to do the same stupid shit again. Bush always means to do it again, and actually promises to do it again.
Man, can't the rehabilitation clinics keep from having people divulge there "sins" as if thats the only thing a person can do to fix there lives. If she felt so guilty about it she would have left the guy or worked something out. This bothers me , because it is like these rehab programs are nothing but infested with this deep religious conviction you have to tell everybody everything you di. I'm sorry but if you want to confess , go to a confessional at a church. You might as well. Mark one more point in the Church for screwing up peoples lives.
I feel for all parties involved and theres more to affairs than people think. Its like "Oh I cheated on you , so you have a right to think I'm super evil and all. I should get therapy. I
should do this, I should do that, I'm the one thats crazy."
Thats what I feel her reaction , when her husband flies off the handle and clips her one, is to be.....because the Church and society thinks she's a sinner , the evil one and she should purge herself of her witch like ways. Getting cheated sucks, I know, but you don't have to persecute and throw stones at the cheater. It was sex or love was lost, whatever. No reason to even know in the first place.
Yeah people should be honest in there love, but feelings for a partner doesn't have to choke out the love,passion, desire, and lust you had between eachother. unless your possessive, which I'm findiing that in modern times has become increasingly so. We are only Human we say, but deep in our hearts we seem to have this controlling factor in relationships.
Marriage is the only union which means something in a realationship, people say. Its like if were not married then you don't love me on and on and on. I get tired of this religious pining on of how thats so great.
Any way I thought of all this while reading the article and I thought of the reasons men go to war, because of there passions for women. They like the best fight of them all "fighting over a women" look at the Trojan War.
And it comes from what 'Religion' and our great ancestors have told us.
Man will never change, and will continue to be self destructive because of love. People are being misled, and we are dooming ourselves if we do not set ourselves free from
the Church and religion.
And I'm not saying that we should all just go out and screw like bunny rabbits...I'm just saying relax the persecution allready. Its making mankind Bi-Polar. Crazy.
Whats your godlike definition of Virtue. All this comming down on the church and its virtues in this rag, and you can't take the fact that no matter what you think or do or act, is
heavily influenced by the religious pining of your parents to be the good liitle boys and girls, and someday you are going to find love and and , you better not cheat....cause Gods gonna get you.
Screw shame and all that guilt. Go to rehab , get made to feel guilty about sex and how you should just love one person.
Its all over hollywood, all over america, all over your neighborhood that someone wnats to screw someone else. Its in every damn show, people watch it, and then they go home feeling better they can indulge in the 'Sins' as long as they don't do it. You want that kind of religion go to Pakistan. they set the rules of who they can screw and not. And if your caught cheating by the masses, whoah your toast.
I'm just saying that this comes to the science of the matter, of how man acts when he wants to control something. You want therapy. I deal in science. Two different arguments my friend. And if you want to throw religion into everything having to do with relationships and all go ahead.
I'm saying its making man nuts. He's a big, jealous, ugly brute... and will continue to be so because he was told he was.
I don't care for cheaters liers or anyone else for that matter. We might as well go to war on cheaters and liers. And hence mans folly. He has to fight about everything.
Not me pal. I don't judge anyone anymore. Leave that for the church. Wanna meat Jesus. He's right here man.
I'm comming from the view point that if I was married and my wife cheated I wouldn't be judgemental, I could live with it, I would not off myself or her and everyone around me, I would feel a little wierd at first but I could move on. I wouldn't quit my job, I wouldn't bow to the masses to get revenge, or write a winey book. I would even put her on a pedestal and show her love daily. Someone elses cock in my wife doesn't mean she didn't love me is all I'm saying. Hell everyones wife had a cock in her one time or another. Big deal. Again the virgin marriage Religious thing again. phooey.
Thats a fear many men have, and it ruins them and starts wars, and hatefilled propaganda that gets people all hot and bothered by equating sex with love. I could be screwing my wife for years and then someday she has
a quicky with a coworker and suddenly lifes over? I'm supposed to reject her like trash. thats someone elses opinion. not mine. I have a little more reasoning factor behind my soul and i'm not so quick to judge. Call me that defeatism whatever, but I learned that sometimes we need to get over our persecution of sexual trystes. I even hate that word. Religion came up with that. "Do you take this women to be your LAWFULY wedded wife"
whys does love have to be Lawful all of a sudden. You can be with someone and now you own them. I love my girlfriend, but I love the freedom to love her forever. Not because I had to. Because I want to. Marriage is overrated. I'm sick of its religous overtones. Everyone harps on Christians and there morals in this slog, so I'm riffing on marriage. I'll get deep. Marriage is a Brain Wash.
If you keep telling people that they don't have to come clean if they're not caught...
I don't know. I think if you have made the commitment, than your spouse needs to have all the facts.
Mirror, you are a fool-parrot. AA is a pointless waste of time. It's main purpose seems to be to tell people it's not their fault, they weren't in control. "Don't feel bad, you were predisposed to it. It was going to happen. Now ask fake god for forgiveness and please donate on your way out."
Load of shit. Doesn't AA have the same recovery rate as going cold turkey or any other way of quitting?
Sputnik, try to condense that into something readable.
Well PDXRitchie:
Does it? I don't know the stats.
I think most recovery programs do some form of the 12 steps, which is basically 1)admit shit insn't going well the way you are doing it right now, 2) be honest with yourself about who you are and what you've been doing, 3) say you are sorry if you have hurt people and if it wont hurt people doing so, and 4) keep being honest with yourself and if you do something wrong admit it as soon as possible so it doesn't fester and make you feel isolated and powerless.
It certainly sounds like way too much trouble if your life isn't going very very poorly and you are very unhappy
What moral system 12 steppers use or what or whether they adhere to a specific spiritual/religious practice is not specified. Given the predominance of Christianity in the US, it is no surprise that for many 12 steppers they use it as their guide, but it isn't mandatory.
I guess what gets some people so resentful about 12 step programs is resentment against perceived religion, the feeling that it is some sort of cult, and the feeling that the AA people are (secretly) judging other people's (ie one's own) drinking and drug use.
But talking about one's fault with another person is just standard practice in any kind of therapy. Catholics call it confession when done with a priest. Atheist therapists call it therapy.
The question here is whether it's therapeutic or ethical in all cases to get it published in the SF Chronicle.
Well if it isn't a cult what is it?
Did you know for a fact that they put people in there who have no problem at all. They not antisocial drinkers, they not full of suioide and not everyone is drinking to kill themselves over lost girlfriends.
But the court seems to think so, and its mandated everyone go to AA to cleanse their souls.
We bought into the Brain Wash because it supposedly works. But all I see is it churning some people into totally self absorbant trainwrecks. And they run around telling everybody , don't take that sin juice. Its gonna be bad, ooooh scary . Its like the big fear campaign we got against the world. Clinics are cool, but not if it has to mandated by society.
I don't trust societies that indiscriminately place people in Rehab programs.
Because thats what they are Programs.
And if you look into the history of Europe, they used to put normal people into insane asylums and the poor bastards were forced to feel paranoid about themselves.
The Church I think had something to do with that, so I am very skeptical of rehab programs yes.
As the church says now...."the moral fiber of this country is breaking down... people are smoking pot, having sex , getting drunk and playing rock music, we got to smite that demon down"
You get my drift that I'm not falling for that. I don't have to come clean with who I am. I already know.
And I like Booze, and I like sex, and I like a lot of things that would make the "devil cry". So what. At least I'm not actively pouring zillions of dollars into the war machine and the church to fulfil a prophecy. If anyone needs to go to rehab, its those guys at the Pentagon. Its like they live for War , and manage to get all the money they need for endless amounts of toys to further war.
Maybe some looking in the mirror could help them. And we could see some progress with trying save this planet from destroying itself from within.
want to see a good movie. See the movie "End of Violence'. There is a lot all the players in San Francisco and around the world even,could learn from that script.
Is your most dumb-fool award an actual mirror? That would be great, as it would remind the recipient "Yes...I too, like this award, must be more reflective." In keeping with the theme, we should have the award ceremony here in Chicago:
Says you:
"However, realizing the relief of one's confession to the harmed party doesn't do any cosmic good if your relief just causes more harm to that party than it does healing. This calculus holds for 3rd parties as well. In these situations the confession is pure selfishness."
The situation you've laid out here is incomplete. You deal only with the confessor and their feeling of absolution. If that were the only factor, if the confessor merely says "I cheated on you. WHEW! That felt SO GOOD!" then strolls away whistling A Nightingale Sang In Barclay Square, then yes, that would be pure selfishness. You neglect to mention the consequences the cheater so richly deserves. They might actually have to feel bad publicly, instead of in solitude. They may have to be yelled at. They might have to watch their loved one cry. They might, horror or horrors, have to accept forgiveness, the poor thing. I dont see the cheater nobly shielding their partner from pain and rightly eschewing a selfish pursuit for absolution. Rather, I see it as a cheater compounding their weakness by being too much of a coward to take responsibility for what they've done, too spineless to submit themselves to their partners reaction and accept the ramifications to the relationship. The whole 'it-would-do-more-harm-than-good' argument is just a veneer to disguise the cheaters own inability to be an adult. AGAIN.
You know, the cheater's feelings don't interest me half as much as the feelings of the cheated upon. And I would want to know. I know it would make the relationship more difficult. I know it makes for far more work and awkward meals and nights alone and the possibility of collapse. But I'm willing to do the work, that's why I showed up in the relationship. I have a responsibility to fix what is broken, together with my partner, if it can be fixed. Which I can't do, if I don't know its broke.
And sure, to not have to deal with a transgression in the here and now would save a little pain. But I know, somewhere down the relationship road, somebody's gonna have to watch the other person die, and maybe take a long time to do it, with a lot of ass-wiping and breathing tubes along the way. Someone is going to lose a job, a house is going to burn down, a child is going to die, some goddamn thing. I want to know now what are the strengths and weaknesses of the relationship are so I can know what's going to happen when there is no simple, pretty lie to keep things rosy. So please, spare me the sparing me.
Finally, mirror, for the engraving of my award, please note the spelling of my name. I cannot tell you how many times Ive received a check or something in the mail with Stephan in Chicago on it.
You may have misunderstood my comments. I don't think absolution is the objective of the amend steps in the 12 steps. (I think the request for forgiveness is a way humbling oneself further after admitting the wrong. Its not the getting but the asking. What more can you do?) The need or desire for absolution should not outweigh consideration of potential injury. Nor should ones "amends" confessions be intended to cause harm as in "Oh yeh, so you want to break up with me? Well I slept with your best friend AND her dog."
As to my strong negativity, I apologize. I felt strongly that the idea that the drunken slut harlot should confess so she can be punished severely as she deserves for her immoral conduct regardless of any other considerations is too narrow a view for me to be comfortable with.
And as I said, I dont know anything about the actual situation here. I merely agree that someone recently into rehab may want to slow down and have a chat with a cool headed person about her motives and the ramifications before she immediately confesses all her infidelities or turns in all her pot dealers.
Here's a pic of the lady-in-question... http://tinyurl.com/2bj5kn
"...the idea that the drunken slut harlot should confess so she can be punished severely as she deserves for her immoral conduct regardless of any other considerations..."
Egads, love! I never suggested that the woman be whipped at a pillory or painted with scarlet letter or anything of the sort. I did not call her harlot, drunk, and the only way you could accuse me of calling her "a slut" is if you went back and anagrammed the word "Tulsa"...which wouldn't work because that ALSO does not appear in the post!
The point I was making simply had to do with "confess the infidelity" versus "hide the infidelity", and my thoughts were not confined to those in recovery, but to anyone in that situation. Prevalent consenus seemed to trend towards concealment, that the cuckold is better left unwitting. I chaffed at this because I feel concealment is less about preserving the relationship and more about saving the cheater from whatever consequences may stem from their revelation. And by consequence, I mean hurt feelings, the threat of separation, messy shit like that. I do not mean being labeled anything untoward by the public at large or drowned as a witch, those are not the consequences of which I speak.
So, no, I don't think she's a slut and should be punished. Quite the opposite. I'm a relationship chump by nature, I'm a huge reconcilliation fan. Though, as I'm sure you'll agree, in the greater scheme it's not what you or I think, it's what they end up deciding that counts. Pray god that stays out of the Chronicle, 'cause I don't have it in me to hash this out again.
And I did misunderstand where you were coming from. I was not dealing specifically with the 12-step recovery process in my post, so I didn't cotton on when you ran with it. Sorry.
There, mirror! We have kissed and made up! Though, full disclosure, you are not the first mirror I've kissed. I'm incredibly vain.
I have to disagree with Dan on this one. Newsom's career ends in the mayor's office, and Rippey was right to confess her affair.
If she'd slept with some other guy, a guy she didn't work for, and with whom her husband didn't work for, and who wasn't her husband's best friend, she could have kept her mouth shut. But affairs with husband's best friend are not going to be secrets forever; they just can't. She needed to tell it for her sake and for Tourk's.
Newsom on the other hand is stone-cold guilty of sexual harrassment in the workplace. Consensual, my ass; he's used his office and his power over her and his political magnetism at its peak, at the time when he was a national superstar, to fuck his underling. That's wrong. The fact that she's his best friend's wife, well, that's bad, but it's not unheard of and it's not unforgiveable. But Newsom's going nowhere in the state (maybe to the state House or something, but not the Governor).
Way to fuck up a promising career, guy. He's let down a lot of people across the country.
Interesting perspective. Not just and employee but also emotionally vulnerable because of alchohol and emotional problems, rocky marriage.
I'd just be happy in Ruby's position to finally ditch my atrocity of a name. Ruby Rippey-Tourk? The music of it is highly annoying. More specifically, her last name sounds like the first and last name of a tele-evangelist's wife.
To whit: Pastor Tourk and his wife Rippey want to wish you a very merry and blessed Christmas this year. Praise Jesus.
Also: If fidelity is of the utmost importance to you, marry someone with no attractive qualities and a very low sex drive. Otherwise, accept the fact, however uncomfortable, that reasonable and rational people often succumb to the overriding urges of the endocrine system. And learn to forgive, because children will play. You can be as righteous about it as you want, but behavior is identity and the record shows that we humans like to spread ourselves around, especially when we're feeling good about ourselves because we are any of the following: young, attractive, attracted, rich and/or powerful.
You are too bright of a man to post such an ignorant argument.
Mrs. Rippey-Tourk is in a rehab program for substance abuse and yet your suggestion is the following:
"Rippey-Tourk could have sucked up the guilt, committed herself to staying faithful in the future, and allowed her poor husband to go to his grave believing that he didnt marry the kind of woman that would do that to him.
Guess what?!? Sucking it up wasn't working for her and it doesn't work for a lot of people. Instead she turned to drugs/alcohol/sex whatever to distract herself from an issue she wasn't able to confront. Ultimately it created such a disruption in her life and the life of her family that she had to seek professional help.
All of us have a right to decide the type of relationship (professional or personal) into which we enter. If one party decides to change the rules or the context of the relationship than the other has a right to this information so they may make the choice to continue or disengage.
Your argument that the confession didn't serve anyone is false. It has allowed Mrs. Rippey-Tourk on opportunity to focus her energies on getting healthy instead of covering lies. It has allowed Mr. Tourk an honest assessment of his personal and professional relationships and it has allowed Mr. Newsom a front row seat on the effect his behavior has on others. Clearly this affair wasn't just "sex" - otherwise it still wouldn't be an issue two years later.
Damn, the more I think about this the more I really don't want to know if my SO goes astray but finds some help to get back on the straight and narrow.
I figured 12 step recovery was about finding a way of taking responsibility for ones own life and stopping causing chaos in the lives of those around you, not exploding ones recovery and secrets upon the planet as an instrument of cosmic justice.
here's a perspective i haven't seen posted yet: now that this scandal has come out, city hall officials are now feeling free to confirm the rumors of the last few years that newsom is m.i.a. when it comes to the daily nitty-gritties of running san francisco. apparently he's too busy fucking, attending socity functions and showboating for the press to do any anctual work. what was the gay marriage fiasco but show? it wound up doing more harm than good. the nation wasn't ready for gay marriage, and the backlash was harmful to all of us. i am a long time resident of sf, i love this city, and what we need is a WONK, someone who will do something about the graft, the ineffectual self-protecting police force, the underfunded city services. newsom is just a GQ pretty boy "spokesmodel" and i say good riddance.
gnossos @4: "yam trap" is a new one on me and now I'm going to be laughing uncontrollably every time I think of it for the rest of the workday. Thanks buddy!!
There are many more reasons Mr. Tourk is better off knowing what he married than not. And as for your opinion on this matter,try adding "and what you don't know won't hurt you" to your vows for your life long partner.
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zpfxmhubo lvdt lcqxmrwb btwgahf pnclbiazk wnxmsl ztiyk http://www.erqpxs.lefi.com
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Past Perfectby Susan Isaacs
View All Available Formats & Editions
In Past Perfect, Susan Isaacs gives us one of her most glorious characters ever: bright, buoyant, and borderline luscious Katie Schottland. Katie seems to have the ideal life: a great husband, a precocious and winning ten-year-old son, and a dream job writer for the long-running TV series Spy Guys. But all is not as splendid as it/i>/i>
In Past Perfect, Susan Isaacs gives us one of her most glorious characters ever: bright, buoyant, and borderline luscious Katie Schottland. Katie seems to have the ideal life: a great husband, a precocious and winning ten-year-old son, and a dream job writer for the long-running TV series Spy Guys. But all is not as splendid as it should be because writing about the espionage business isn't nearly as satisfying as working in it.
Fifteen years earlier, Katie was in the CIA. She loved her job (to say nothing of her boss, the mysterious Benton Mattingly). Yet just as she was sensing she was in line for a promotion, she was fired escorted off the premises by two extremely hulking security types. Why? No one would tell her: when you're expelled from the Agency, warm friends immediately become icy ex-colleagues who won't risk their security clearances by talking to you.
Until that day, Katie was where she wanted to be. Coming from a family of Manhattan superachievers, she too had a job she not only adored but a job that made her, in the family tradition, a Someone. Fifteen years later, Katie is still stuck on her firing. Was she set up? Or did she make some terrible mistake that cost lives? She believes that if she could discover why they threw her out, she might be at peace.
On the day she's rushing to get her son off to summer camp, Katie gets a surprise call from former Agency colleague Lisa Golding. "A matter of national importance," says Lisa, who promises to reveal the truth about the firing if Katie will help her. Lisa was never very good at truth-telling, though she swears she's changed her ways. Katie agrees to speak with her, but before she can, Lisa vanishes.
Maturity and common sense should keep Katie in the bright, normal world of her present life, away from the dark intrigues of the past. But she needs to know. As she takes just a few steps to find out, one ex-spy who might have the answers dies under suspicious circumstances. Another former agent is murdered. Could it be there's a list? If so, is Katie now on it? And who will be the next to go?
Editorial Reviews
The Washington Post
"There has to be a name for the literary form Susan Isaacs has invented: the funny scary book. The woman who made us laugh as well as shiver in fear over a murder investigation in Compromising Positions has done the same thing for the CIA and international espionage. Past Perfect made me laugh, but it also kept me jumping out of bed every time a floorboard creaked in my old house." Sara Paretsky, author of Fire Sale
"I love Susan Isaacs! Her books come straight from the heart, and her characters are smart, funny, and feisty enough to be your best girlfriend not only for three hundred pages, but for life. Past Perfect introduces Katie Schottland a terrific galpal who packs her kid off to summer camp and sleuths as a CIA analyst with equal style. Put simply, Past Perfect is perfect!" Lisa Scottoline, author of Dirty Blonde
Product Details
- 9780743242165
- Publisher:
- Scribner
- Publication date:
- 02/13/2007
- Pages:
- 352
- Product dimensions:
- 6.00(w) x 9.10(h) x 1.20(d)
Read an Excerpt
Past PerfectA Novel
By Susan Isaacs
ScribnerCopyright © 2007 Susan Isaacs
All right reserved.
Chapter One
Oh God, I wish I had a weapon! Naturally, I don't. Of course, if life in any way resembled Spy Guys, the espionage TV show I write, I'd pull off the top of my pen and with one stab inflict a fatal wound, and save my life. Except no pen: just two pieces of chewed Dentyne Ice spearmint wrapped in a receipt for sunscreen and panty liners.
When I began making notes on what I naively thought of as Katie's Big Adventure, I hadn't a clue that my life would be on the line. How could I? This would be my story, and every ending I'd ever written had been upbeat. But in the past few weeks I've learned that "happily ever after" is simply proof of my lifelong preference for fantasy over reality.
Unfortunately, fantasy will not get me out of this mess. So what am I supposed to do now? First, calm down. Hard to do when I'm crouched behind a toolshed, up to my waist in insanely lush flora that's no doubt crawling with fauna.
It's so dark. No moon, no stars: the earth could be the only celestial object in a black universe. And it's hot. Even at this late hour, there is no relief from the heat. My shirt is sweat-drenched and so sucked against my skin it's a yellow-and-white-striped epidermis.
I cannot let myself dwell on the fact that my danger is doubled because I'm so out of my element. Me, Total Manhattan Sushi Woman, cowering behinda toolshed in fried pork rinds country with unspeakable creatures from the insect and worm worlds who think my sandaled feet are some new interstate.
Adam, my husband, would probably be able to identify the nocturnal bird in a nearby tree that refuses to shut up, the one whose hoarse squawks sound like "Shit! Shit! Shit!" Adam is a vet. A veterinary pathologist at the Bronx Zoo, to be precise. Were something that feels like a rat's tail to brush his toes in the dark, he wouldn't want to shriek in horror and vomit simultaneously, like I do. He'd just say, Hmm, a Norway rat. Adam is close to fearless.
I, of course, am not. If I concentrate on what's happening here in the blackness, the slide of something furry against my anklebone, the sponginess of the ground beneath the thin, soaked soles of my sandals, a sudden Bump! against my cheek, then something, whatever it is (bat? blood-swollen insect?) ricocheting off, I will literally go mad, and trust me, I know the difference between literally and figuratively. I'll howl like a lunatic until brought back to sanity by the terrible realization that I've given away my precise location to that nut job who is out there, maybe only a hundred feet away, stalking me.
Feh! Something just landed on the inner part of my thigh. As I brush it off, its gross little feet try to grip me.
Don't scream! Calm down. Taoist breathing method: Listen to your breathing. Easy. Don't force it. Just concentrate. Listen. All right: three reasonably calm breaths. What am I going to do? How am I going to survive? Will I ever see Adam again? And our son, Nicky?
What used to be my real life back in New York seems as far away as some Blondie concert I went to when I was fifteen. All right, what the hell was I originally thinking I had to do here behind the toolshed? Oh, try to remember what I wrote in the journal I began a day or two after that first disturbing phone call. Maybe something I'd unthinkingly jotted down could help me now, or could at least allow me to delude myself that this episode will be yet another of my...and they lived happily ever after.
Copyright 2007 by Susan Isaacs
Excerpted from Past Perfect by Susan Isaacs Copyright © 2007 by Susan Isaacs. Excerpted by permission.
All rights reserved. No part of this excerpt may be reproduced or reprinted without permission in writing from the publisher.
Excerpts are provided by Dial-A-Book Inc. solely for the personal use of visitors to this web site.
Meet the Author
Susan Isaacs is the author of thirteen novels, including As Husbands Go, Any Place I Hang My Hat, Long Time No See, and Compromising Positions. She is a former editor of Seventeen and a freelance political speechwriter. She lives on Long Island with her husband. All of her novels have been New York Times bestsellers.
Brief Biography
- Hometown:
- Sands Point, New York
- Date of Birth:
- December 7, 1943
- Place of Birth:
- Brooklyn, New York
- Education:
- Honorary Doctorate, Queens College
- Website:
- http://www.susanisaacs.com
Customer Reviews
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Most Helpful Customer Reviews
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I have so enjoyed Susan Issacs in the past - not so the last few novels. This book looked promising but was plodding and slow and, by the end, you didn't even care any more. She can do better.
Story was drawn out and boring - I skipped to the end to see why she was fired,closed the book and brought it back to the library. Would not recommend book to anyone.
I enjoyed Susan Isaacs past books but the past 2 have been a waste of my time. I couldn't even finish Any Place I Hang My Hat and this one I barely finished. The plot was just too political and drawn out. It just kept going on and on with her meeting with these people and trying to find out about why she was fired from the CIA. At least her husband was supportive in this effort but otherwise it was not worth reading.
CD/abridged/Mystery?: Big disappointment. I got this for two bucks at the library sale because I had listened to another Issac's book. This book is not a thriller, as there is no real suspense and not a mystery, or maybe I stopped caring. It's the story of a former CIA agent, Katie, living her life as happy as possible. She was fired from the CIA without cause from her low level position. Without good references for a regular 9 to 5 job, she is now writing books and screenplays for her creation, TV show "Spy Guys". A former annoying co-worker, Lisa, calls needing a journalistic contact. She claims to have startling information that can't be told over the phone. Katie, not really having any contact like that, tries to blow Lisa off until.........Lisa says she know why Katie as fired. Dun-da-da-daa. The rest of the book is Katie trying figure out if Lisa is really missing and why. The Randye Kaye does a great job in the reading, but the story is lame and empty. There are too many unanswered questions at the end mixed in with complicated Eastern Bloc issues.
Past Perfect was a good book. The story and characters were different and I wish it was a series with these same characters.
I don't understand why there are so many negative reviews. I usually am not a fan of the mystery genre, but this book was engrossing, entertaining, and hilarious. I would highly recommend it
I enjoyed this book! While it wasn't as great (for me) as my favorite (Shining Through), I really had a good time reading it. I thought the book was more in line with the books she's written that I really like: Lily White, Red White & Blue (I think!). The main character was believable, the story interesting, and of course, the Isaacs sense of humor (and some nice political commentary) spread throughout. If you like Susan Isaacs (heck, if you like a good, fun read), I recomend this book!
This was my first and probably last book by Susan Isaacs. I bought it based on the book jacket's description of the storyline and because of the raves by other 'authors'. Big Mistake! HUGE mistake! I literally trudged through this book. I skipped parts, tried to reread, put it down, and then start over. Finally, I just skipped to what seemed to be getting close to some sort of climax, read it, and put the book down. What bothered me? First, her completely over-the-top-need for over-the-top sentence structure and language. I found it confusing, unnecessary, and down right sill confusing. I'm an English major and teach reading, yet I struggled over and over with this book's prose and style. The plot itself? I thought it might have possibly had some direction. That was until I kept reading and rereading almost entire pages of useless commentary and reflection by the main character. Bottom line, the protagonist got fired from the CIA 15 years ago. She never got over the fact that nothing was explained to her or a satisfactory answer given. So, after receiving a strange phone call from her past, she embarks on this "dangerous" mission to find out what "really happened." At no time in the book was I in suspense. At no time in this book did I feel chills run down my spine. I simply was angry at myself for buying the book in hard cover. Waste of money. Totally. The ending was corny and the "suspense" not suspenseful. Sorry, but this book is not worth your time.
In the past, with a few exceptions, i.e., among others, 'Any Place I Hang My Hat', I have enjoyed Susan Isaac's work for what it is - light entertaining reading. But she has struck out with her last two. This book is boring and repetitive. The protagonist's imaginging all sorts of dire things happening to her, i.e., an overworked imagination, got to be annoying after about 30 pages and the plot was lame, lame, lame. Not one likeable character in the whole novel - and, to boot, they were cardboard cut-outs rather than real people. Skip this.
At first it seemed like this was going to be a promising read...sadly it went from ok to just plain boring. The writter took so long to get to the point you could really care less! I kept on reading hoping it would turn around, but it never really did.

subset: commoncrawl


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ICAD: Targeting Risk Factors Could Slash AD Numbers
PARIS -- If the known risk factors in Alzheimer's disease were actually modified to a relatively modest degree, nearly half a million Americans with ... more
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GSD Course Bulletin - Spring 2012
This term's information was last refreshed on 12 MAY 2015 14:53:34.
Courses taught by Eve Blau
04359: Urban Form: History + Theory (HIS 0435900)
Urban Planning and Design
Lecture - 4 credits
Wednesday 10:00 - 1:00 Gund 124
Eve Blau
Course Description
The course is historical and theoretical. It is concerned with the economic, social, and political factors that shape urban processes and environments and the efforts of individual actors, interventions, conceptual models, and practices to comprehend, gain control over, regulate, and reshape those processes and environments. The course will span the period from the First Industrial Revolution in the late 18th century, through the Second (technological) Revolution in the late 19th century and the Third (information) Revolution in the last quarter of the 20th century. The focus is on Europe and North America. The emphasis of this critical history is on the dialogic relationship between urban planning and urban design and the technological, economic, political, and cultural contexts and institutions in which they operate.
05211: Cities by Design II (SES 0521100)
Urban Planning and Design
Lecture - 4 credits
Tuesday Thursday 10:00 - 11:30 Gund 111
Rahul Mehrotra, Eve Blau, Jana Cephas, Felipe Correa, Peter Rowe, A. Hashim Sarkis
Course Description
No Prerequisites. The year-long Cities by Design course is mandatory for all incoming 2011-12 Master's of Urban Design Students. All other students are welcome to enroll in the course by semester, and need not do so in sequence.
'Cities by Design' is a year-long course that studies urban form. Each semester, 'Cities by Design' will explore five urban case studies to expose students to a range of factors that affect the design of contemporary cities in various geographical contexts. The case studies will focus on both the urban condition as a whole by exploring processes of urban evolution, and on the study of urban fragments or projects. Each case study will be taught during a two-week module, comprised of four lectures and one discussion section. The Spring Case Studies include: Quito, Detroit, Istanbul, Shanghai, and Berlin. These are distinct from those presented during Fall 2011.
Two main pedagogical objectives guide the course. The course will allow students to establish a broader definition of the 'urban,' forging commonalities amongst a diversity of cities. It will also provide the historical and comparative material to identify the urban characteristics and design strategies that render particular cities distinct. Comparative analyses of the urban case studies will be guided by the following eight themes, which will be explored through the lectures, section discussions, and assigned readings:
1.The city's genealogy and key historical events, phases of development & patterns of growth. The ways in which the terrain, geography, and infrastructural development constrain and present opportunities for the city's development and ambitions.
2.The city's planning and design culture and decision-making institutions.
3.The challenges that social equity present to planning and design in the city.
4.The orchestration of the city's relationship to the broader region.
5.How the particular city contributes to a definition of the 'urban' condition.
6.The framing and design of key urban projects/ case studies.
7.The city's planning institutions, historical conditions, urban forms, or ambitions, etc. that have contributed to its iconicity in a global context.
Term grades will be based on attendance and participation in both lectures and section discussions, biweekly response papers based on assigned readings, and a final term paper.
09201: Independent Study by Candidates for Master's Degrees (ADV 0920100)
Independent Study - 4 credits
Peter Del Tredici, Iñaki Abalos, Pierre Bélanger, Eve Blau, Neil Brenner, Joan Busquets, Felipe Correa, Daniel D'Oca, Gareth Doherty, Andreas Georgoulias, Jose Gomez-Ibanez, Andrea Hansen, K. Michael Hays, Michael Hooper, Eric Howeler, Timothy Hyde, Niall Kirkwood, Sanford Kwinter, David Mah, Panagiotis Michalatos, Mark Mulligan, Ciro Najle, Ken Tadashi Oshima, Richard Peiser, Chris Reed, Ingeborg Rocker, Peter Rowe, A. Hashim Sarkis, Allen Sayegh, Jeffrey Schnapp, James Stockard, Maryann Thompson, Charles Waldheim, Bing Wang, Krzysztof Wodiczko, Martin Bechthold
Course Description
Students may take a maximum of 8 credit units with different instructors in this course series.Prerequisites: Graduate standing. Candidates may arrange individual work focusing on subjects or issues that are of interest to them but are not available through regularly offered course work. Students must submit an independent study petition and secure approval of their advisor and of the faculty member sponsoring the study.
09302: Independent Thesis in Satisfaction of the Degree MAUD, MLAUD, or MUP (ADV 0930200)
Urban Planning and Design
Research Seminar - 8 credits
Eve Blau, Neil Brenner, Felipe Correa, Diane Davis, Jose Gomez-Ibanez, Michael Hooper, Rahul Mehrotra, Peter Rowe, James Stockard
Course Description
Following preparation in GSD 9204, each student pursues a topic of relevance to urban design or urban planning, which may include design or planning exploration, academic inquiry, or a combination thereof.
09304: Independent Thesis for the Degree Master in Design Studies (ADV 0930400)
Research Seminar - 8 credits
Allen Sayegh, Martin Bechthold, Pierre Bélanger, Eve Blau, Neil Brenner, Andreas Georgoulias, K. Michael Hays, Timothy Hyde, Joyce Klein-Rosenthal, Sanford Kwinter, Rahul Mehrotra, Kiel Moe, Mohsen Mostafavi, Richard Peiser, Christoph Reinhart, Peter Rowe, Panagiotis Michalatos
Course Description
A student who selects this independent thesis for the degree Master in Design Studies pursues independent research of relevance to the selected course of study within the Master in Design Studies program, under the direction of a GSD faculty member. This option precludes taking any other independent study.


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Dear Esther tops 250,000 sales
Thechineseroom's Dan Pinchbeck has announced on Twitter that unusual atmospheric adventure Dear Esther has passed a 250,000 sales milestone. "We always said we'd celebrate if we shifted 20,000," the modest indie noted.
Dear Esther launched in mid-February, was profitable in under six hours, and shifted 50,000 copies in its first week. Pinchbeck is now working on Amnesia: A Machine for Pigs for Frictional Games.
Thanks, GameInformer.
Sometimes we include links to online retail stores. If you click on one and make a purchase we may receive a small commission. For more information, go here.


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Senior Management Group
Hervé Ladsous, Under-Secretary-General for Peacekeeping Operations
On 2 September 2011, United Nations Secretary-General Ban Ki-moon announced the appointment of Hervé Ladsous of France as Under-Secretary-General for Peacekeeping Operations, replacing Alain Le Roy.
A seasoned diplomat, Mr. Ladsous brings to the position extensive experience acquired during his service in a variety of countries. He held a broad range of positions in France's Ministry of Foreign Affairs after joining it in 1971. As a junior diplomat, he was posted to Hong Kong, Canberra and Beijing, in addition to being a member of the permanent representation to the UN in Geneva.
After having served as Deputy-Director General of the Department for the Americas, he was appointed Chargé d'affaires ad interim in Haiti, before becoming Deputy Permanent Representative to the UN in New York.
He was Permanent Representative to the Organization for Security and Co-operation in Europe (OSCE) in Vienna and Ambassador to Indonesia and Timor-Leste, before holding senior posts in Paris as Spokesperson for the Foreign Ministry and Director General for Asia and Oceania.
Before assuming his most recent position as Chief of Staff to the Minister for Foreign Affairs, he was Ambassador to China.
Mr. Ladsous holds a law degree and a diploma in Chinese and Indonesian Malay from the National School of Oriental Studies in France.


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I posted this on stackoverflow, but it looks like superuser would be more appropriate.
I have a CentOS 5 machine that runs Windows 7 as a dual boot. CentOS is the main OS and each OS is set up in a specific hard drive. This was set up before I joined the company and I don't really have need to run Windows now.
My question is: can I, from CentOS, reformat the Windows HD, change GRUB settings and get the HD to be available on CentOS? Happy to provide more info if this helps.
Many thanks for your help and apologies if this is a very simple issue... I don't want to blindly test things on this machine as it is used on a daily basis by several users.


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by Jeff Spross Dec 18, 2014
The extension is retroactive through 2014, but still expires at the end of this year, rendering it effectively useless as far as planning for new wind projects goes.
by Jeff Spross Apr 2, 2014
Sen. Ron Wyden's (D-OR) proposal to extend dozens of tax breaks doesn't include the credit for wind energy. But it could by the end of tomorrow, according to multiple Senators.
by Climate Guest Contributor Jul 26, 2013
Ron Wyden (D-OR), Chairman of the Senate Committee on Energy and Natural Resources, announced that he is seeking bipartisan agreement on a number of issues related to the expansion of shale gas production.
by Hayes Brown Jul 23, 2013
Sen. Ron Wyden (D-OR) ominously warned an audience on Tuesday of just how deep the rabbit hole goes when it comes to domestic spying.
by Hayes Brown Mar 14, 2013
by Hayes Brown Mar 13, 2013
by Zack Beauchamp & Hayes Brown Mar 6, 2013
by Hayes Brown Mar 5, 2013
by Public Lands Team Jan 4, 2013
by Igor Volsky Oct 10, 2012


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Tags Matching:
Originally published 08/02/2013
Italian police seize huge haul of illicit antiquities
Police in southern Italy have seized a large haul of well-preserved artefacts that were illegally excavated between the two southern towns of Benevento and Foggia, near Naples. A total of 584 antiquities were recovered, estimated to be worth around €2m and intended for sale on the black market.Investigations are ongoing, but so far 21 tombaroli, or graverobbers, have been identified by police, while a 46-year-old man from the area has reportedly been charged with handling stolen archaeological objects after investigators searched his property in the nearby town of Castelpagano.The artefacts are reportedly in very good condition and range from a large ancient Greek krater estimated to be worth around €150,000 to small pieces valued at around €1,500. The collection includes other Greek objects, including a group of fourth-century BC ceramic bowls decorated with red figures, various Etruscan and Corinthian objects, a set of 340 rare coins, many Roman lanterns and a particularly well-preserved helmet....
Originally published 02/22/2013
German police return smuggled artifacts to Kosovo
Seven artifacts dating as far back as 4,000 B.C. have been returned to Kosovo after German police stumbled on them in an unrelated raid, the country's culture minister said Friday.The artifacts date to the Neolithic period and are believed to belong to the Vinca, a prehistoric culture that traces back to 5,500 B.C. in southern Europe. Police in central Germany found them in 2005 during a separate undisclosed investigation, discovering the pieces in a sports bag belonging to two Serbs...


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Here Are Several Common Airbnb Problems No One Checks for Before Booking
It's really easy to glance at the rating, scroll through the pictures, check the price and check out. If I was booking a hotel, I'd never have to think twice: I expect all my hotel comforts to be sitting and waiting there for me. But unfortunately, hotel comforts aren't standard in residential buildings.


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Pueblo police say two brothers have been arrested in a shooting that happened in the early morning hours of Dec. 7.
They say it was at 1:39 a.m. that they got a call of shots fired in the 100 block of West B St. They found 28-year-old Eugene Roy lying in the street with a gunshot wound.
Witnesses say they saw a black truck with a tool box in the back leave the scene. Pueblo County Sheriff's Office deputies found a vehicle matching that description and took two men into custody, but they were later released.
Over the next next several days, detectives continued to interview witnesses and gather information. On Dec. 13, police say there was enough evidence to arrest the two men previously released. They have been identified as 32-year-old Cesario Vigil and 29-year-old Claude Vigil.
The brothers were taken to the Pueblo County Jail on attempted second-degree murder warrants, and are being held on $100,000 bonds.
The victim is still recovering in a Pueblo hospital.


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Re: Advice on NFCU re-fi
I would definately apply! I was just approved for an auto loan at the 1.9% and the letter I received had my score at 665 (wasn't planning on getting a car but was in an accident with a drunk driver last week and my car was totaled). I also believe they are offering a bonus of something like $250.00 if you refinance your auto loan with them. Best of luck!
(2,330 Views)


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Counseling Services
You are hereHome/ Students/ Counseling and Wellness/ Counseling Services
Contact Us
(617) 912-9112
Drop-In Hours
M, W, F: 11am - 1pm
32 The Fenway, Lower Level
After Hours
If you need to contact Counseling Services after business hours, or during office closings, please call the After Hours Counseling Support Line at 617-912-9183.
The Counseling Staff at the Counseling and Wellness Center, is here to support students as they define goals, develop strategies for change, realize a greater understanding of self and others, and expand personal potential. The staff is also available to help students who may be experiencing specific mental health concerns ranging from depression and anxiety, to trauma, sexual assault, substance use concerns, disordered eating, self-injury, suicidality and psychosis.
Any concern a student has is regarded as important and treated with respect. Counselors are sensitive to issues of ethnicity, religion, sexual orientation, gender, physical capacities, and learning differences.
All Counseling Services are included in the comprehensive fee that full-time students pay.
Counseling Services
- Assessment and Referral
- Individual Counseling or Psychotherapy
- Consultation to the Community
- After Hours Counseling Support
- Online Mental Health Screenings
- Education Materials
- Interactive Programming
- Workshops
Free On-Line Mental Health Screening
Scheduling a Counseling Appointment
To make a counseling appointment, please contact us via phone at 617-912-9112, or via email at firstname.lastname@example.com. We will respond within the next business day and can help you set up an appointment.
Counseling Hours
We have morning, afternoon and evening availability Monday through Saturday. Appointments can be scheduled as early as 8am, and as late as 7pm throughout the week.
Drop-In Hours
Drop In Hours provide students an opportunity to have a brief unscheduled appointment with a counselor to discuss a problem or concern, ask a question, find referral resources, or schedule an appointment.
Mondays, Wednesday and Fridays 11:00am - 1:00pm
Confidentiality and privacy are of outmost importance for counseling services. All counseling sessions will be kept confidential and no information will be revealed to anyone outside of the Counseling and Wellness Center without the written consent of the student receiving services, unless it's required by law.
If a student is judged to be a danger to self and/or others, or if minors, elderly, or persons with disabilities are being abused or neglected, legal and ethical standards will require the counseling staff to break confidentiality as to protect for the people involved.
A detailed notice of privacy practices and other limits to confidentiality is reviewed as part of every initial counseling appointment and is available upon request.
Description of Services
Assessment and Referral
If a student has been experiencing emotional distress, he or she can meet with a counselor for an assessment of his or her needs and determination of possible recommendations including individual and group psychotherapy, outpatient or impatient treatment, or psychopharmacological treatment.
If a student has a history of psychotherapy or treatment and is new to the Boston area, the counseling staff will work to find an appropriate provider if need.
Individual Counseling and Psychotherapy
Individual counseling is an opportunity for students to meet one-on-one with a counselor to discuss any personal concerns. Students seek treatment for a variety of reasons including adjustment issues, relationship and family concerns, depression and anxiety, substance abuse, sexual assault or harassment, suicidality, self-injury and other mental health concerns.
Students work with the counselor to determine the appropriate course of treatment. Each student is eligible to receive twelve counseling sessions on campus per academic year. When it is determined that a referral to the community would be best for a student, the counselor will work with the student to find appropriate supports in the Boston area.
Consultation to the Community
The counseling staff is available to all members of the Boston Conservatory community, including students, parents, faculty and staff if there are concerns about the mental health and wellbeing of a Conservatory student. While confidential information cannot be released, the counseling staff can help clarify any concerns about a student and help determine a best plan on action to reach out to the student. If needed, the counseling staff can also reach out to a student of.
After Hours Counseling Support
When the office is closed, during evenings and weekends, a counselor can be reached by contacting the After Hours Counseling Support Line at 617-912-9183. A counselor is available 24/7 to discuss issues of concern, or respond to an urgent concern.
Online Mental Health Screenings
Mental Health Screenings are available to students throughout the year. Students may be screened for anxiety, depression, bipolar disorder, post-traumatic stress disorder, eating disorders, or alcohol abuse. Following your screening, you will be given recommendations for follow-up and information on where to seek further diagnostic evaluation or treatment, if necessary.
Take an on-line screening
Education Materials
Education materials on a wide variety of mental health and personal growth topics are available to students free of charge. Literature, pamphlets and other self-help tools are often used by students to get more information about an issue troubling them or someone else in their life. To access this information, students can contact the counseling staff.
Interactive Programming
Counseling programs occur on campus throughout the year, and provide a focus on stress management, mental health awareness, substance use resources, and other areas of interest. Programs are open to all students, and are a great way to learn more about counseling on campus.
The Counseling staff is available to present or organize workshops on a variety of health topics. Please contact us if you would like to schedule a workshop for your residence hall, classroom, or event.
- Counseling and Wellness
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- Conservatory Connections
- Contact Us
- Disability Services
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- Student Handbook
- Student Programs


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A peculiar request this one.
I am looking to compare two times in C#.
I have:
DateTime systemDate = DateTime.Now.AddMinutes(-15);
//which I presume subtracts 15 minutes from the current time
I am then reading in an ftp file from a Fedora server containing a date and time that I am reading in as a stream and converting to a DateTime
2011-03-17 09:00:18.000000000 +0000
I then parse this:
compareDate = DateTime.Parse(streamer);
My Question therefore is how do I format systemDate to be in the same format as the one I have parsed in compareDate? I am aware you can format DateTime but all of the sites I have seen so far dont have it in this format.
Thank you in advance, feel free to comment if you think I have missed anything :)


text:
Parliament of Australia
House is not live
House of Representatives
Senate is not live
Current section pages
My Parliament
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The Committee of Privileges and Members' Interests is appointed to:
See Role of the Committee for more information.
The SecretaryHouse of Representatives Standing Committee of Privileges and Members' InterestsPO Box 6021Parliament HouseCanberra ACT 2600Phone: +61 2 6277 4222Fax: +61 2 6277 firstname.lastname@example.com
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Convex Glass
The native Swede John Fabian Carlson became a household name in New York art circles during the early 20th century, training at the Albright School of Art with Lucius Hitchcock and the Art Students League with Frank Vincent DuMond.
In 1906, Carlson was instrumental in relocating the League's summer school from Connecticut to Woodstock, New York, where he imaged the still beauty of the surrounding countryside in fine Tonalist landscapes. Director of this summer school in 1911, Carlson established the John F. Carlson School of Landscape Painting in 1922.
Mr. Shae Avery's Biography
On Fox 5 (Wednesday, August 17, 2011).
Click here to watch the video.


text: Fort Wainwright Hundreds Turn Out in Fairbanks to Urge Army Officials to Reconsider Troop Cuts By Tim Ellis • Feb 25, 2015 Tim Ellis/KUAC Hundreds of Fairbanks-area residents and a platoon of elected officials turned out Tuesday to tell a delegation of Army officials why they shouldn't reduce the number of soldiers stationed in Alaska. Many of those who spoke emphasized that Alaska has something that no other state can offer – its location. Listen Listening... / 2:57 Fort Wainwright Symposium Showcases Arctic Gear Army is Considering Buying By Tim Ellis • Feb 9, 2015 Tim Ellis/KUAC U.S. military experts got a chance last week to check out new Arctic-rated outdoor gear that was on display at Fort Wainwright. U.S. Army-Alaska hosted a symposium to show equipment that's being tested as possible replacements for gear in the Army inventory. That may include such venerable standbyes as the bunny boot. Listen Listening... / 3:18 Military's Busy Schedule Limits Moose Hunting on Training Range Near Greely By Tim Ellis • Sep 11, 2014 U.S. Army One of the best moose-hunting areas in the Interior can be found on a military training range near Fort Greely. But a busy Army and Air Force training schedule is limiting hunters' ability to get back into the area. Listen Listening... / 2:46 State, Army Develop Procedure for Hunters to Use New Tanana River Bridge in Salcha By Tim Ellis • Aug 19, 2014 Alaska Railroad State and Army officials have agreed on a procedure that will allow hunters to use the new Tanana River bridge in Salcha to get to military lands on the other side of the river. The agencies established the process in time for hunters to get access to military training areas in September. Listen Listening... / 2:34 Alaska Native Crews Head South To Fight Wildfires in California, Oregon and Elsewhere By Emily Schwing • Aug 14, 2014 Emily Schwing / KUAC Fairbanks, AK - More than 300 firefighters from across are Alaska are in California battling wildfires for at least the next two weeks. Most of them traveled from Interior Alaska villages for the Alaska Fire Service and the Alaska Division of Forestry. The crews came through Fairbanks before they left for the lower 48. For some, it's a respite from village life. For others it will be the first time they've left the state. Strykers Begin 'Intense Training Cycle' With 105mm Gun-qualification Exercises By Tim Ellis • Aug 5, 2014 DVIDS Army and Air Force personnel and equipment will be out in force over the next couple of weeks throughout the Interior as they engage in two major field training exercises. Soldiers with Fort Wainwright's Stryker brigade begin a live-fire exercise today, and the Air Force launches its next Red Flag training round Thursday. Listen Listening... / 1:59 Army OKs Fines, Better Underground Storage Tank Oversight in Deal With EPA By Tim Ellis • Jul 3, 2014 U.S. Army Army officials have agreed to pay nearly $160,000 in fines to the Environmental Protect Agency for Fort Wainwright's failure to manage underground storage tanks as required by a federal law designed to protect groundwater. Listen Listening... / 1:15 Proposed Army Cutbacks Could Impact Alaska Bases By Dan Bross • Jun 30, 2014 https://twitter.com/USArmy Fairbanks, AK - The U.S. Army is looking at greater cutbacks than previously considered, and there could be Alaska impacts. Ft. Wainwright and Joint Base Elmendorf-Richardson are among posts nationwide being considered for reductions as part of the Army's "2020 Force Structure Realignment". Army Seeks 'Data Gaps' Over Cleanups at Old Chem/Bio-warfare Site Near Greely By Tim Ellis • Feb 3, 2014 Alaska Community Action on Toxics Environmental officials are reviewing cleanup work that's been done at a military test site south of Delta Junction. The Army tested chemical- and biological-warfare agents at the site during the height of the Cold War. The state and military want to round up all available information on cleanups that've been done at the Gerstle River Test Site and surrounding area to ensure it doesn't pose a threat to human health. Listen Listening... / 3:01 Army Pulls Back on Its Role in Igniting Stuart Creek 2 Fire By Lori Townsend • Jul 10, 2013 Anchorage, AK - As firefighters continue to battle the Stuart Creek two fire, U.S. Army Alaska officials are now saying they are not sure they are responsible for starting the blaze. Fort Wainwright Garrison commander Colonel Ron Johnson told residents of Pleasant Valley and Two Rivers last Saturday night, that artillery training exercises had started the blaze. But on Tuesday, US Army Alaska public affairs chief Major Alan Brown was not as definitive. "Right now, our position is we can't make an official determination on exactly what caused it. Pages1 2 next › last »


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Brain Cancer Health Center
Antihistamine Use Tied to Brain Tumors
April 4, 2006 (Washington) -- Taking antihistamines may raise the risk of developing certain types of brain cancer, a new study shows.
"We want to stress that this is preliminary data and that antihistamines do not cause brain cancer," says researcher Michael Scheurer, PhD, of the University of Texas M.D. Anderson Center in Houston.
Given how many people take antihistamines to relieve sneezing, itching, dry mouth, and other allergy symptoms, "many more people would have brain tumors if they did," he tells WebMD.
Allergies Protect Against Deadly Brain Tumors
Reporting at the annual meeting of the American Association for Cancer Research, Scheurer says he believes this is the first study to look at the potential effects of antihistamines on the development of brain tumors in adults.
That said, a relationship between the two makes sense.
The reason: About a half dozen previous studies have suggested that people with allergies or asthma have a lower risk of the most deadly type of brain tumor, called glioblastoma.
"Allergies and asthma may produce enough inflammation in the brain to keep immune system cells active and working to prevent cancer," Scheurer says.
Since people take antihistamines to counter allergy's effects, the researchers wanted to see if the drugs also counter allergy's protective effects.
Gliobastomas are the most common of brain cancers, accounting for 50% to 60% of the 17,000 new brain cancers each year in the U.S. They're also the most potent, taking the lives of another 17,000 men and women, Scheurer says. "But very little is known about their cause."
Glioblastoma Risk Not Affected
Somewhat surprisingly, antihistamine use did not affect the risk of developing glioblastomas one way or another.
But the allergy drugs were associated with increased risk of other types of brain tumors. Specifically, people who used the medications regularly were 2.8 times more likely to develop lesser-grade anaplastic astrocytoma brain tumors and 86% more likely to develop low-grade glioma brain tumors than people who didn't take the drugs.
That's not to say the findings are trivial, however: Even low-risk brain tumors are often deadly, Scheurer says.


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Anna Simms Banks
From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
|Ann B. Simms Banks
Louisville, Kentucky
Winchester, Kentucky
|Suffragist, orator, politician
|William Webb Banks
|Isabella and Marcus (or Marquis) Simms
Anna Simms Banks (1862–1923) was an African-American educator and political figure from Winchester, Kentucky. After women gained the right to vote in the United States in 1920, she was a fully credited delegate at the 7th Congressional District Republican Convention in Kentucky, reported to be the first African-American female to hold such a position in the southern part of the United States.[1][2]
Family life[edit]
Banks was born in Louisville, Kentucky. She was married to William Webb Banks, who was politically active about the issue of civil rights for African-Americans.[3]
- ^ "Negress Is Delegate in Kentucky.". The New York Times. March 4, 1920. Retrieved 30 September 2011.
- ^ "Anna B. Simms Banks". Notable Kentucky African Americans Database. University of Kentucky. Retrieved 30 September 2011.
- ^ "William Webb Banks". Notable Kentucky African Americans Database. University of Kentucky. Retrieved 30 September 2011.
|This Louisville-related article is a stub. You can help Wikipedia by expanding it.


text:
Detail from my October election issue cover illustration for Leader's Edge Magazine. See the entire image on my website at http://www.markdraws.com.
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1 January, 2000@12:00 am
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Erule might have to live under the shadow of his own achievements, having cemented his name with "Synopsis" and "Listen Up" from the mid-90s, but at least he's striving to reach that peak again. His last 12″ was pleasant enough ("The Real Me") but "Milestone" seems to go a step further. While a lyrical style that has me thinking of Nasty Nas circa Illmatic era, Erule spits with conviction: "sincerely/this is really/how severely fucked up/from what's what/getting' cuffed up/murder or stuck up/it's tough luck." Frankly, it's not that easy to figure out exactly what he's trying to say but on record, it sounds genius. Chew on that for a minute and while you do it, enjoy King Born's simple, slick track of hard-knockin' drums and a sprinkle of keys. It's so good you might as well forget about the B-side, "Sabotage" which mostly just suffers from an anemic track (also by King Born) though Erule's still dropping some cipher-strung lyrics on the line.
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Re: Utilizatio
n Theories
webhopper wrote:
Hi there!
I'm going to step outside the box and state that I don't follow the robotic utilization patterns unless I'm going to be applying for something in that month. Certainly if the scores are very important and if you want to minimize utilization as a game, then following the utilization pattern of <9% utilization on one card and all other cards reporting a zero balance will give you the desired results.
What I do try to do is keep all of my spending on my Amex charge card, which doesn't impact my utilizations. The benefit to letting a balance report depends on the lender. If your total CL on a card is 4k, and your highest balance ever reported on the card is $350, then why would that creditor or any other creditor be tempted to give you higher limits?
If you can show that you use your current lines reponsibly, then you can get higher limits in the future. Irresponsible behavior such as "maxing out" cards, and missing payments or only paying the minumums should be avoided at all costs.
that's my 2 cents worth!
Yep. I completely agree.
It's interesting to speculate how we would be talking about util if FICO Capacity Scores were obtainable by consumers instead of just by lenders. Just because we can't get the scores doesn't mean it, or similar non-public scores aren't a major factor in credit and CLI granting. It seems clear to me that many strategies aimed at low Util are likely ones that produce less than attractive metrics on those other scores.
I have reestablished credit over the last couple years
so my moniker is, well, rather out of date.
WM Discover $1800, WF Plat 12k, Chase Freedom Siggy18k, Amex Plat (60k H/B), Citi AA EWMC 25k


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Template talk:Vice Presidents Succeeding Presidents
From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
Inclusion Criteria[edit]
This template needs to have a defined inclusion criteria as to whether only Vice Presidents who succeeded to the Presidency due to the death or resignation of their predecessor (John Tyler, Millard Fillmore, Andrew Johnson, Chester A. Arthur, Theodore Roosevelt, Calvin Coolidge, Harry S. Truman, Lyndon B. Johnson, and Gerald R. Ford), or should incumbent Vice Presidents who were elected as President in their own right (John Adams, Thomas Jefferson, Martin Van Buren, George H.W. Bush) also be included. --TommyBoy (talk) 02:03, 26 December 2010 (UTC)
- Since it appears that all incumbent Vice Presidents who were elected or succeeded to the Presidency are being added to this Template, I have added Martin Van Buren who is the only other Vice President meeting that criteria and had not been included. --TommyBoy (talk) 04:50, 27 December 2010 (UTC)


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AGM ~ LONDON ~ 2016 Sunday 8th May
Another very successful day, a big thank you to all.
Report coming soon... meanwhile the journal Index update to April 2016 can be found on the NEWSLETTER page...
...Details of a collection for sale can be found on the SHOP / FOR SALE page (members only)...
...and please keep checking the Future Events section.
The OAICC was founded by the late Derek C. Davidson in 1982 on behalf of all those who are interested in collecting the material evidence for our optical past. There are about 200 members from many countries including the UK, Australia, Belgium, France, Germany, Italy, Japan, Netherlands, South Africa and the United States of America. Regular visits and excursions are arranged to museums and private collections, both in the UK and abroad. It celebrates its 34th Anniversary in 2016 and issued the 134th (Anniversary) edition of the quarterly Club Journal 'Ophthalmic Antiques' in January 2016.
Members have many interests covering the development of spectacles (including oriental spectacles), pince-nez, eyebaths, ophthalmic instruments, spyglasses, opera glasses, prints and antique books. A Journal is published quarterly with articles of general and specialised interest, along with auction news and details of club excursions (both in the UK and abroad) and publications.


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by Jessica Goldstein Jul 2, 2015
"You can't say, 'Oh, I'm sorry, there were other ballerinas who are better than you who we're going to hire.' It's very difficult to say that when you have Misty Copeland in the room."
by Jessica Goldstein Jul 22, 2014
"Where are we going to go now? Space? Atlantis? Water ballet?"
by Alyssa Rosenberg Aug 27, 2013
The new director of the Paris Opera Ballet (and Natalie Portman's husband) is saying smart things about race, gender, and art. Hollywood should listen.
by Alyssa Rosenberg Jul 23, 2013
The business and artistic case for why Amazon, Netflix, or Hulu should step up and save the great, now-cancelled 'Bunheads.'
by Hayes Brown Feb 15, 2013
by Alyssa Rosenberg Jul 11, 2012
by Alyssa Rosenberg Feb 7, 2012


text:
"Garmisch-Partenkirchen" Top 5 Page for this destination Garmisch-Partenkirchen by MrBill
Garmisch-Partenkirchen Travel Guide: 310 reviews and 1,060 photos
We have lived in Garmisch on the weekends since 1999 - hiking, biking, skiing, and enjoying the mountains. I am also a Member of the National Ski Patrol in the Garmisch Mountain Patrol.
First of all, let me say that living in GAP is wonderful. We love the place. We love it even more when it snows in the Winter, and is sunny in the Summer. It tends to rain too much in GAP, and the snow can quickly disappear when it gets too warm. Blame it on global warming. However, this past Winter we were lucky and had decent snow for a change right up until Easter.
It is about 1-hour south of Munich on the Austrian border, and about 55-kms from Innsbruck on mostly twisty mountain roads. A life-time of winter driving in Canada, and I put my Audi in the Rhubarb last Winter on this road. So watch the road, not the scenery.
We live in a wonderful, old house called Haus Amsel that was built in 1936. I can only describe it as Landhaus-style. The winow shutters are candy striped red & white. It is three stories high, and we have the apartment under the eaves. We have mountain views out of both sides. They are trememdous.
Weekends are spent in the surrounding mountains - God's Cathederal - doing whatever the season dictates. Main thing is that we are active and out and about in the fresh air.
We often visit the swimming pool in Grainau, just outside of GAP, in the shadow of the Zugspitze, the highest mountain of the German Alps. In the summer you can sit outside and picnic on the grass next to the Olympic sized pool. Inside there are saunas, steam baths, a large jacuzzi, and a play area for children adjacent to the 25-metre pool. After a hard day of sport, relax in the jacuzzi and gaze out the picture windows at the church on the hill against the background of Zugspitze.
General Tip: Buy a trail map and get out of GAP itself. It is a bit of a tourist trap. Although we do like to go to the local Fests in the summertime. All the locals even wear their lederhosen and dirndels, which funnily enough, do not look the least bit out of place in GAP.
- Pros:hiking, biking, skiing, close to Munich & only 3-hours from Italy
- Cons:tends to rain too much
- In a nutshell:I spend every weekend I can enjoying GAP
Reviews (41)
I used to like skiing in Garmisch-Partenkirchen a lot. It was a great little mountain to have in my backyard. I don't... more travel advice
Weekend snow slides killed at least five people ? including three Canadians ? and seriously injured about 10 others who... more travel advice
If you are an American skiing in Europe the one thing you will not see in the Alpine backcountry, or off-piste as we... more travel advice
So, normally you might associate Garmisch-Partenkirchen with Bavarian food, but GAP has always attracted many... more travel advice
Local Customs (1)Catholic Bayern
General (12)See All photos around GAP - 10 -
Things to Do (7)See All Vierschanzen-Tournee - 7 -
Off The Beaten Path (3)See All childhood dreams never really go away
What to Pack (2)See All packing light is sound advice
Transportation (2)See All Zugspitzbahn & other lifts
Tourist Traps (1)The Zugspitz
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Comments (23)
Lived in GAP in 1980/81 so yr pages brought back happy memories, of swimming at kainzenbad & riessersee. Love it here too!
never made it there - will make it one day
very cool pages. :)
Bill, ever thought of writing a book on Garmisch-Partenkirchen? Excellent pages and coverage of things one needs to know. A stellar page and thanks for sharing the extra photos. Kat
Great tips and pictures!
Another great GaP page. Was thinking of visiting next Winter but now tempted by Summer too!
I vonlunteer hubby. A Canadian born named Charlie who hikes, bikes, loves VW bus, knows Europe, very flexible with time. He refuses to learn French though, but he can speak Spanish and passable Italian.
To quote Rod Stewart, "Every picture tells a story, don't it? I visited GAP with my mom in 1969 and we stayed at the Hotel Alpenhof. Wonderful memories!
Despite its proximity to Munich we never quite got up to GAP - will have the Zugspitzbahn to look forward to at some future date. Thanks for breathtaking views!
great fotos of bavarian rural mountains
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"would you think less of me if I didn't have a cheesey motto?"
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Learn how to use the TVout library to control a TV in this continuation of my first lesson on Arduino clones.
If you are looking at this project, make sure you have seen my previous one, Getting Started with Arduino Clones. In this tutorial, we will continue from where we left off, and learn how to control a TV by wiring the Arduino clone to an RCA cable (only wiring is shown here, see TVout Google code site for how to program).
WARNING: ATTEMPT AT YOUR OWN RISK! I have found that my Arduino clone is partially dysfunctional (will run TV and LED, but not speaker or LCD). Here are the parts that you will need. They are, from left to right, a 6 or 9 volt battery pack, misc. wire, an Arduino clone, a breadboard, and a 7805 voltage regulator.
Place the Arduino clone on the breadboard, with one row of pins on either side of the breadboard.
Now, on the "front" side of the breadboard, next to the Arduino clone, place the 7805 chip with the heatsink facing away from you.
Next, let's hook up the battery pack. Put the positive (red) probe into the same row as the far left pin of the 7805, and put the negative (black) probe into the negative bus (the line of pins with the blue line over it). Also, run a wire from the row with the middle pin of the 7805 to the negative bus, and run a wire from the right pin to the positive bus.
It's starting to get a tad more complex. Run wires from the positive bus to the rows with the pins labeled "VCC" and "AV," and run wires from the negative bus to the rows with both of the "GND" pins.
Nice job! The LED on the board should light up. If it doesn't, make sure that you have done all of the steps correctly, and that you soldered your clone correctly. Now, assemble a "parallel programmer," which is a device that hooks into a Windows or Linux computer (if it originally ran Windows) that will program this device. If you have a AVRISP or other programmer, then use that instead. Here is how to build a parallel programmer.
Now, let's build our first project! Collect the parts shown (LED, wire, and 330 ohm resistor).
Now add a resistor from either pin 13 or pin B5 (depending on the model of your Arduino clone), and connect it off to a row with nothing else on it.
Last step before programming: place the long (+) probe of the LED into the same row as the resistor, and the short (-) probe into the new negative bus.
Here's an easy step. Once the parallel programmer is finished, just hook in into the back of your computer, and into the ISP pins on the Arduino clone (the 2x3 array of pins on the Arduino clone).
Now, open the Arduino IDE (get this from http://arduino.cc), go into Tools -> Board, and select the option "Arduino Clone with Parallel Programmer."
Assuming that the wire is speaker wire or similar wire with 2 wires inside coating, strip the coating off of the wire, and strip both of the wires inside.
Connect the wires to the RCA cable. The black (-) wire goes to the taller connection, and the red (+) wire goes to the shorter connection.
Before we start wiring, get rid of the LED and resistor from the previous project.
Connect the 470 ohm resistor to digital pin 7 (D7), and the 1k ohm one to B1, or pin 9. Make their other ends go into the same unused row off to the side (sorry that the LED assembly is still on there in the picture).
Now, connect the RCA cable. The black wire goes to the negative bus, and the red wire goes in the same row that has the 1k and 470 ohm resistors both connected to it.
Program the Arduino clone, as in the previous project, with the NTSC demo code that comes with the TVout library, available here. (To install the code, just click the Open button in the Arduino IDE, and go to "TVout." Click on the code that you want to open. Then click the download button.)