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Having triumphed with Just My Type, an illuminating guide to type fonts that made many best sellers and best books lists, Garfield returns to show how maps both reflect and shape human history. Over 100 maps and illustrations and thoroughly Americanized by Britisher Garfield, with new sections.[Page 56]. (c) Copyright 2012. Library Journals LLC, a wholly owned subsidiary of Media Source, Inc. No redistribution permitted.
Garfield's best-selling Just My Type (2011) was about typefaces. Now he's done the same for maps. The result is not deep history but it is pleasurable history nonetheless: readers will enjoy this romp through 16,000 years of mapmaking, beginning with a hunter's map found in a cave in northern Spain and proceeding all the way to today's GPS, Google Maps, video games, and Me Mapping. Aimed at educated lay readers who want both to nourish their mind and divert it, the book dispenses a good deal of information in the process: the problems the earth's curvature has posed in its representation, how maps reflect national and cultural biases, how maps have been used to solve problems like the spread of cholera in 1854 London, the technical progress made in mapping. "Maps are only human, after all," quips Garfield. VERDICT Readers of popular history will enjoy this entertaining and informative book. This is popular history but not "history light."[See Prepub Alert, 7/22/12.]--David Keymer, Modesto, CA[Page 74]. (c) Copyright 2012. Library Journals LLC, a wholly owned subsidiary of Media Source, Inc. No redistribution permitted.
Innumerable modes of seeing the world unfold in this exuberant history of maps. Garfield (Just My Type) loosely follows the development of cartography, taking in the precociously scientific geography of the ancient Greeks; medieval England's Hereford Mappa Mundi, drenched in Christian allegory and teeming with mythical beasts; the Age of Exploration's heroic maps of newly discovered, sketchily drawn, and wrongly designated landmasses (America got its name from a cartographer's erroneous belief that Amerigo Vespucci discovered it); the 19th-century map that established cholera as a water-borne disease; modern GPS systems, and video game fantasy maps. Along the way he pursues diverting cartographical anecdotes and oddities, including the centuries-long consensus that California was an island, the lingering conceit that women can't read maps, and the appearance and disappearance of canals on maps of Mars. Garfield's coverage of this terrain, lavishly illustrated with reproductions of famous maps, is broad but paper-thin--more a meandering guided tour than a systematic survey. Still, his droll humor and infectious curiosity will keep readers engrossed as he uncovers surprising ways in which maps chart our imaginations as much as they do the ground underfoot. Photos, illus., maps. (Jan.)[Page ]. Copyright 2012 PWxyz LLC


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Can the US do more to reduce alcohol-related death and disease?
The World Health Organization is calling on governments around the globe to help curb alcohol-related deaths and illnesses after releasing its global status report on alcohol consumption.
The World Health Organization is calling on governments around the world to work on reducing alcohol-related deaths and diseases.
More than 3.3 million people died in 2012 from harmful alcohol use internationally, according to a global status report it just released on alcohol usage in 194 countries.
In the United States, people ages 15 and older consumed an average of 8.7 liters of pure alcohol per capita between 2008 and 2010. That's up slightly from 8.5 liters per capita between 2003 and 2005.
Russia, Portugal, Grenada and Andorra were among the countries that consumed the most alcohol, with consumption between 11 and 12 liters per capita, according to Business Insider.
Tell us: Should the United States do more to curb drinking-related illnesses and deaths? What do you think about the amount of alcohol consumed in the United States? What's your stance on alcohol regulation?

subset: commoncrawl


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Impressive amount of information you got going on... well done!
I felt like breaking my silence regarding this thread/post, it is confirming many of my suspicions. You seem to be bravely "wading" through a dense linguistic "swamp" of words and facts, and it is mind boggling how language (any language) can be so complex. I really am ridiculously scared to talk about this. I find that the grave accusations made here, reflect all the psychological weight of the subject, so no need to say more. I just felt like writing something about what you have been discussing (but not getting into details).
I hope you are for real (and not who it was said you were)...
Abramelin, on 29 March 2013 - 07:30 AM, said:
Talking about copies....
I always said it is strange that only one copy of the OLB survived.
Has it ever crossed your mind that oral tradition could have been chosen instead of a written record? I remind you of that the "christianization" that took place in those days, especially in northern Europe, in the beginning of the Crusades, must have had dire obliterating consequences, whether to written or spoken information. The possibly existing copies of the OLB and other documents or even the very idea of it, was simply "erased" from the records? And even those who might have known something, hid it from "strange" eyes and ears, fearing punishment and/or death. The BS speaks of a long time oral tradition, where ancient "his tory" was encapsulated. From what i have read of the OLB (never finished the book, but read many parts several times), it has the same approach, in the sense that it is a story told to a son, of ancient traditions but of disturbing events going on at the time too. In my opinion, their goal seems to be that of perpetuating an ancient information, regarding Atlantis (?) demise, but also of how was society organized and how you should continue to follow that ancient tradition. The use of brute force by the church while evangelizing the "unfaithful" must have changed the way nordic people lived their own cultures. Resuming, i find that it is a desperate cry that "survived" the then wild days of inquisition, but this all failed to be understood properly.
"People have attempted to understand why the Indian philosophy has reached highest in the world, despite the people having neither reading nor writing skills. But it has been built up through an oral tradition. The eldest was taught by his father, and it was his duty to again teach his siblings " — Ior Svedlin (Bock) to Hufvudstadsbladet May 4, 1982[2]
The Puzzler, on 29 March 2013 - 09:05 AM, said:
In other Germanic languages, including German, its name is similar or identical to that of English V.[4] In many languages, its name literally means "double v": Spanish doble ve (though it can be spelled uve doble),[5][note 1] French double vé, Icelandic tvöfalt vaff, Czech dvojité vé, Finnish kaksois-vee, etc.
Literally double V - so a W written as VV would not be that odd. That it's in Finnish is especially interesting.
I think you are absolutely right!
Never knew why the English or Portuguese call the letter W, double U (UU) in the first place... although they are very close to each other, that is UVW.
In Finish (according to the wiki link you posted), the W has the same value as V, does that not ring bells? According to Svedlin (Ior), the letter V stood for Vaner (people), who spoke Van Language (one language) contrary to more ancient Aser people who spoke Rot language. Rot language was the first, then came the Van language...
"In Norse mythology, the Vanir (singular Vanr) are a group of gods associated with fertility, wisdom and the ability to see the future. The Vanir are one of two groups of gods (the other being the Æsir) and are the namesake of the location Vanaheimr ("Home of the Vanir"). After the Æsir–Vanir War, the Vanir became a subgroup of the Æsir. Subsequently, members of the Vanir are sometimes also referred to as members of the Æsir."
Therefore, i believe the letter VV is really just a symbolism, perhaps marking the beginning of a new era of descendancy of the letter V. Notice that in the so called Aser Alphabet, the letter W is intertwined with the Y letter (which stands for Ygdrasil):
BTW: the letter U likewise strangely meant Ursprung...
From Middle High German ursprunc, from Old High German ursprung, corresponding to ur- + Sprung. Compare Dutch oorsprong.
IPA: [ˈʔuːɐ̯ʃpʁʊŋ]
Ursprung m (genitive Ursprungs or Ursprunges, plural Ursprünge)
More food for thought...
Mario Dantas


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June 2013
The main stem of the Kuskokwim River has gone without restrictions for salmon fishing this season. At least, up until now. Restrictions will go into affect this Friday in the form of 6-inch gear limitations.
Read more →
A former foster parent and daycare provider in Bethel has been arrested for charges that he sexually abused a 4-year-old. Bethel police arrested 69-year-old Peter Tony June 13 after investigating him for six months. They say he could have many more victims going back to the 1970s.
The large wildfire burning near Lime Village in the upper Kuskokwim area continues to grow although dense smoke has complicated aerial surveying the last few days.
Read more →
The Alaska Department of Fish and Game in Emmonak is restricting all Yukon District 1 and 2 fishermen to beach seine gear and dip nets.
Nearly half of the subsistence fishermen found guilty of illegal fishing on the Kuskokwim River are appealing.Their attorney, James Davis Jr., filed the notice of appeal. He says 11 fishermen have decided to appeal the convictions that were handed to them at the Bethel District Court in May and filed the paper work June 2.
Read more →


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May 6, 2016
LOVE COUNTY, OK - Firefighters say 3 ,000 acres have now burned.
Love county emergency management says at this time no structures are in danger.
They says winds have caused the fire to spread into parts of Marshall county.
We are told at this time the fire is under control.
All crews have left the scene except the Lebanon fire department.
The fire started Sunday around noon near Love Valley Road and highway 32 - on the banks of the Red River.
Click Here to access the online Public Inspection File
Viewers with disabilities can get assistance accessing this station's FCC Public Inspection File by contacting the station with the information listed below. Questions or concerns relating to the accessibility of the FCC's online public file system should be directed to the FCC at 888-225-5322, 888-835-5322 (TTY), or email@example.com.


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Powered by the Intel® dual-core processor and 4GB of memory, it delivers high performance at a throughput rate of 250 Mbps to ensure stable recordings and smooth playbacks of multiple megapixel cameras. The 4-bay rackmount VS-4116U-RP Pro+ is designed for the SMB segment with the features of robust performance, solid reliability and high-definition local display.
The VS-4116U-RP Pro+ can support up to 16TB of storage capacity, with 4TB on each hard drive respectively, to accommodate high quality H.264, MPEG-4, M-JPEG, and MxPEG recording videos. The VS-4116U-RP Pro+ supports local display via an HDMI cable, with up to 180 fps Full HD 1080p local display by hardware decoding.
Surveillance Features
Complete Recording Functions
High Quality H.264, MPEG-4, M-JPEG and MxPEG Recordings (depending on the camera models)
All-in-one Recording Functions
Megapixel RecordingsThe VioStor NVR supports megapixel recordings (up to 10-megapixel) from various IP cameras.
Multi-stream supportAdministrators now can flexibly define multiple video streams (supported by specific camera models) according to bandwidth resources and number of live-view channels. The adjustable video stream setting helps improve the displaying quality of live-view and well manage the bandwidth resources based on different usage requirements.
Smart RecordingThe VioStor NVR automatically selects video streams from IP cameras for different recording scenarios. In normal situation, video recording maintains at lower quality resolution. While the alarm event happens, video recording switches to high quality resolution to capture more details. In other words, smart recording effectively avoids the constant storage consumption at all time, but achieves greater storage efficiency and boost recording quality when alarm events happen.
Real-time Digital WatermarkingThe VioStor NVR supports real-time digital watermarking to protect the videos and snapshots from unauthorized modifications. The Watermark Proof utility is provided to verify whether or not the videos and snapshots are original.
Network Surveillance with Full HD 1080P Local DisplayDiversified Modes for Local Monitoring
High Resolution Local DisplayThe VioStor NVR provides an HDMI port which can be connected to an HDMI monitor or TV for doing monitoring in the full HD (1920 x 1080) resolution.
Convenient Control of PTZ and Speed Dome CamerasThe PTZ (Pan/Tilt/Zoom) cameras can be adjusted directly and the preset positions of the IP cameras can be viewed on the local display interface of the VioStor NVR.
Digital Zoom Digital zoom (in/out) of the video image is supported on the monitoring and playback interfaces of the NVR.
On-screen Event AlertWhen an event occurs, an alert icon will be shown instantly on the local monitoring page. The alert details can be viewed by clicking the alert icon
Video SearchThe VioStor NVR supports convenient video search by date and time on the local playback interface.
Local Video Playbacks on HDMI Monitors or TVsThe VioStor NVR supports direct video playbacks on HDMI monitors or TVs.
Quick System SetupThe VioStor NVR can be set up in simple steps on the local display interface.
Network Surveillance by Web-based Interface to PerformReal-time Remote MonitoringCross-platform SupportUse QNAP Surveillance Client for Windows and Mac to watch the live view and play back the recording files on the VioStor NVR.
Cross-browser CompatibilityOn the Windows PC, you can also use Google Chrome, Microsoft Internet Explorer, or Mozilla Firefox to enjoy our surveillance features.
Multi-server MonitoringConnect to one VioStor NVR and monitor up to 128 channels from other VioStor NVR servers over the LAN or WAN via an IE browser.Note: The feature is supported by Google Chrome, Microsoft Internet Explorer, and Mozilla Firefox
Diversified Remote Monitoring Modes
Smart Control of PTZ & Speed Dome CamerasThe PTZ (Pan/Tilt/Zoom) cameras can be directly adjusted by the web user interface of the VioStor NVR.
Preset Position Control and Auto CruisingThe preset positions of an IP camera can be viewed by clicking the corresponding number buttons on the monitoring page. The time interval can also be configured on the PTZ cameras to perform periodic monitoring.
Instant Event NotificationWhen the alarm recording is enabled and an event occurs, an alarm icon will be shown instantly on the monitoring page. The alert details can be viewed by clicking the icon.
Digital ZoomDigital zoom (in/out) of the video image is supported on the monitoring and playback interfaces.
Dynamic E-mapThe VioStor NVR provides the E-map function for users to upload the digital maps and indicate the locations of the IP cameras of a monitoring location or region.
Remote Video PlaybackMulti-view PlaybackUse the multi-view playback feature to divide a video equally into multiple sessions for doing playback in a multi-view window, or play the videos of multiple IP cameras in the multi-view window simultaneously.
Video Search by Date and Time, Timeline, Event, Intelligent Video Analytics (IVA)The VioStor NVR supports quick video search by date and time, timeline, event, and intelligent video analytics (IVA), which includes motion detection, foreign object, missing object, out of focus, and camera occlusion.
Event ManagementAdvanced Event ManagementVioStor NVR supports various event handling options for different kinds of events.
Real-time SMS and Email AlertConfigure the SMTP server and SMSC server settings on the NVR in order to receive instant system warnings or error messages by email and/or SMS
Convenient Backup SolutionStorage ExpansionVioStor NVR provides surveillance storage expansion solution which enables users to leverage the Turbo NAS storage capacity. By installing the StorageExpansion QPKG in the Turbo NAS, administrators can connect the VioStor NVR with the Turbo NAS to flexibly enlarge the total surveillance storage.
Scheduled Remote ReplicationThe VioStor NVR supports scheduled remote replication for performing secure data backup to a remote QNAP NAS on the local network.
One Touch Auto Video BackupConfigure the one touch auto video backup button at the front of the NVR to copy the data from the NVR to an external storage device when the button is pressed.
Excellent Hardware DesignIntel® CPU and DDRIII Memory for Superior System PerformancePowered by the Intel® CPU and DDRIII memory, the VioStor NVR delivers superior performance for surveillance applications.
Linux Embedded SystemThe Linux-based VioStor NVR is more power-saving and less vulnerable to virus attacks compared to the PC-based surveillance solution.
Huge Storage Capacity for Long-term RecordingsThe VioStor NVR supports RAID 0, 1, 5, 6, 5+hot spare, single, and JBOD disk configurations. Its hot-swap design allows a failed drive of a disk volume (RAID 1 or above) to be replaced by hot swapping without turning off the server.
Mobile Surveillance by VMobileUse the VMobile network surveillance application on Android phone, Android Tablet, iPhone, iPad, or iPod touch to easily access video management functions Multi-view PlaybackUse the multi-view playback feature such as remote live view and playback recordings. In addition, the account on the VioStor NVR can be used to connect to an unlimited number of NVRs and IP cameras by VMobile through Wi-Fi, 3G, or 4G networks.
Camera functionFisheye DewarpingThe fisheye dewarping function, available on the web and local display interface for specific fisheye cameras and specific cameras with panomorph lens, assists in doing practical surveillance management, allowing the administrators to view the monitoring area in a clearer shape.
Security ControlAuthority ManagementCreate multiple users on the VioStor NVR and assign them to different user groups (administrator, system manager, or user) with different rights for doing monitoring, playback, PTZ control, and audio monitoring.
Auto LogoffThe VioStor NVR supports automatic user logoff from idling configuration pages. The administrator can set the timeout period to log off the users when the idling time has been reached.
Host Access Control Specify the host or IP connections to be allowed or denied to access the NVR.
On-line User ListView the record of users currently logged on and previously logged on to the NVR.
Detailed Event LogsThe VioStor NVR provides detailed event logs of system warnings, hard disk errors, network disconnections, UPS status, and access to the networking services of the NVR and video recordings
High Reliability and Smart FeaturesAdvanced RAID with Hot-swap DesignThe VioStor NVR supports RAID 0, 1, 5, 6, 5+hot spare, single, 6+hot spare and JBOD disk configurations. Its hot-swap design allows a failed drive of a disk volume (RAID 1 or above) to be replaced by hot swapping without turning off the server.
Online RAID Capacity Expansion and Online RAID Level Migration
S.M.A.R.T. & Advanced HDD Health Scanning (HHS)S.M.A.R.T. (Self-Monitoring Analysis and Reporting Technology) helps monitor the hard disk drives status. The VioStor NVR supports HHS (HDD Health Scan) for doing disk checking and bad blocks scanning.
Automatic System Startup after Power RecoveryThe VioStor NVR supports automatic system startup after a power recovery.
UPS Support for 24/7 ServiceThe VioStor NVR supports APC, CyberPower, MGE, and YEC UPS devices to provide continuous services 24/7 against unexpected power outages.
DOM Architecture with Embedded Fail-safe Dual OS for Enhanced ReliabilityAll the OS and applications of the VioStor NVR are embedded in the DOM. The VioStor NVR allows system booting without accessing the physical disk sectors to prevent from unsuccessful system startup caused by bad blocks or file errors on the hard drives. Two operating systems are built on the DOM to boot the system alternatively upon every system startup. When one fails, the other one can be used for system startup and the failed OS is recoverable from the other healthy OS.
Network ServicesDual Gigabit LAN Ports
Built-in DDNS ServiceThe VioStor NVR supports dynamic DNS (DDNS) for convenient access to the system by a domain name instead of a lengthy IP address.
Built-in NTP ServerThis feature allows the connected IP cameras to synchronize their date and time settings with the NVR.
Convenient Data AccessThe video data on the VioStor NVR can be accessed via the following protocols with proper access rights:
Easy Configuration and ManagementSystem Setup in Simple StepsThe NVR can be set up in 6 simple steps via the local display or web-based interface (Internet Explorer).
Web-based User InterfaceAll the system configurations, monitoring, and playback features of the NVR can be managed by the web-based interface.
Smart Search of IP Cameras for Quick SettingsQNAP provides an intelligent software utility, Finder, to search for IP cameras and configure the system settings on the local network quickly.


text:
We found a TicketWeb account that might belong to you.
Log in to link your TicketWeb account with Facebook
Saturday, Jul 07, 2012 7:45 PM EDT (7:25 PM Doors)
Magno Screening Room, New York, NY
A documentary on the once-promising American rock bands The Brian Jonestown Massacre and The Dandy Warhols, and the friendship/rivalry between their respective founders, Anton Newcombe and Courtney Taylor.
Tickets $10 Theater A at the Magno Screening Room


text:
Chubby Asian babe stroking and gagging her horny lover's hard and meaty stick. This plump and cock-craving Asian babe plays and rubs her lover's throbbing and meaty dick till it gets hard. She swallows it whole and rides on it stiffly till she get filled with thick and creamy cumshot.
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UN forum: Israel systematically violating Palestinian human rights
Western countries urge Israel to lift Gaza blockade; Iran envoy: Israel's policies are racist, discriminatory.
Israel drew fire regarding its human rights record on Thursday at a United Nations forum where its neighbors accused it of committing systematic violations against Palestinians in Gaza and the West Bank.
Delegations from Syria, Egypt and Iran raised concerns about Israel's security barrier, its detentions of young Palestinians, and what they called "illegal" settlements during the regular review by the UN Human Rights Council.
Western countries, including Australia, Britain, Canada, France and Germany, urged Israel to lift its blockade on the Hamas-controlled Gaza Strip which they said had led to a worsening humanitarian situation.
Iran's Ambassador Ali Reza Moaiyeri said the debate could not sufficiently address the "gross and systematic human rights violations committed against the Palestinians".
These included targeted killings, torture, the demolition of houses, and "racist and discriminatory practices", he said.
But Aharon Leshno Yaar, Israel's Ambassador to the UN in Geneva, told the Universal Periodic Review (UPR) session there was a "certain sense of pride at the culture of human rights that we have managed to develop in the six short decades since the founding of our state".
"Our record is not perfect but the advantage of being a democracy is that multiple mechanisms exist for critical dialogue and oversight. The UPR is one such mechanism," he said.
The 47-member UN Council has held three special sessions looking at Israel's treatment of the Palestinians since the body was created in 2006, and Israel has allowed eight UN human rights investigators to visit in the past three years.
Malkiel Blass, deputy attorney general in Israel's justice ministry, told the Geneva session that Israel faced continuous security threats and had to build its security fence and wall after "waves of suicide bombings" began in 2002.
Israeli interrogations of security suspects are subjected to "scrupulous oversight" and torture is prohibited, said Daniel Taub, senior deputy legal adviser in the foreign ministry.
"The Gaza Strip has become a hotbed for terrorists preparing and launching attacks," Taub said, adding that more than 200 mortar shells were fired on Israel from Gaza in the past week.
Israel said it opened its border crossings with the Gaza Strip on Thursday for the first time in a week to allow in limited amounts of food, medical supplies and fuel.
It is also allowing foreign journalists to enter for the first time since Nov. 4, when an armed raid into the coastal enclave triggered a surge in cross-border rocket attacks by Palestinian militants.
Egypt's Ambassador Hesham Badr said the Council was not going out of its way to "target Israel", rather that Israel had chosen to "ignore its commitments" under international law.
Israel's main ally, the United States, did not speak during the three-and-a-half hour debate which continues on Tuesday.


text:
82.389 palabras (≈ alrededor de 6 horas)
A violent, epic, action-packed urban quest full of very eccentric, often hilarious, extremely dangerous characters who also happen to be animals — the wildlife of New York City, to be exact. Winner of a 2011 ForeWord Book Of The Year Award. Published by the prestigious literary press The Porcupine's Quill.
"Fascinating ... humorous, horrifying ... artfully imagined and constructed ... gets at a lot of complex stuff without being heavy-handed." - ForeWord Reviews… (más)
A modern classic in the spirit of Watership Down - well worth a read.
Lengua: Inglés
Escrito en: 2011
Publicado: 2011-10-20
Numero de palabras: 82.389 palabras (≈ alrededor de 6 horas)
Licencia: Atribución - No uso comercial - No modificaciones
Tags: beasts of new york, epic fantasy, urban fantasy, new york city, fantasy, Squirrels, quest
Jon Evans is a novelist, journalist, adventure traveller, and software engineer. His novels have won Arthur Ellis and ForeWord Book Of The Year awards, translation into half a dozen languages, and praise from The Economist, The Times, and The Washington Post.
Jon's journalism has appeared in Wired, Reader's Digest, The Guardian, The Globe and Mail, and The Times Of India, and he writes a weekly column for TechCrunch.
Jon has released all of his published novels - Dark Places, Blood Price, Invisible Armies, The Night of Knives, Beasts of New York, and Swarm - under a Creative Commons license, and all can be freely downloaded from Feedbooks.


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|Berkeley Parents Network
|Post a Msg
|What's New
Abusive Relationships
I recently found out the husband of my sister-in-law has been physically abusive to her for the past 10 years. I had recogninzed that he was basically a jerk and was emotionally abusive to her and her oldest son, (not his biological child). He's a classic Dr. Jeckel/Mr. Hyde. He's violent with her at night, after the kids are asleep.
I did some research and found some resources for battered women in her area, and had a brief conversation with her where I expressed concern for her safety and the emotional development of her kids.
She confirmed the abuse but seemed shocked that I wanted to talk about it, or that I considered her to be a victim of domestic violence. Her family has an engrained ''code of silence'' about a lot of things. I haven't been able to have a private conversation with her yet to follow up. But I doubt that she's taken any action.
With Thanksgiving coming up I don't know what to do. I feel I can't sit through a day with him and pretend that nothing is wrong. I feel very strongly that silence is enpowering to the abuser, and that silence makes me a sort of accomplice. I want to bring this out in the open. Her parents do not know about the abuse (yet), but all the siblings do.
I do not want to do anything the will place her or her children at greater risk, or that will cut me off from her completely. Any advice? anon
I would suggest that you might keep the notion of her autonomy in mind as you continue through this journey. She is not a minor so legally does not require outside protection. It sounds like she is on her own journey with it and has begun to talk about it. This is an important step for her to take-- it is a sign that she is beginning to take charge of the situation. If someone else in the family were to intervene and ''tell the truth'' at this point without her consent, it would likely make her feel overpowered and incapable. The ramifications of such a communication would then be dramatic and unpredictable. I would invite you think about ways you can empower her and support her. Let the choice be hers. If you can't be present at Thanksgiving, then let her know that privately and don't go. Rev. Kim Hinrichs
It wasn't until my husband harmed me physically and the doctors called the police that he was forced to get help. The doctors and police did for me what I was totally incapable of doing for myself. I'm telling you this so that you will understand how totally paralyzed your sister in law is. The process/cycle of abuse is slow but certain, the process of empowerment is just as slow.
I know that my life was saved and now I can't believe I ever felt scared. I can't really help you much except to say that you can call the police to report physical abuse, especially if you see signs of abuse. I would always tell the children and their mother that the father's behavior is unacceptable, since many times the denial of a problem is just as bad for a child. If they can't escape, at least let them know you know it's abuse and they did nothing wrong.
I would suggest that you get as much information as YOU can so that you can best help. Finally, I do know that sometimes Children's Protective Services WILL take children away from even an abused mother because abused or not, she is responsible for the child's safety and is endangering them when she doesn't take action.
I feel very sorry for your sister in law's situation but she is lucky to have someone like you in her life. Please do what you can for the children too. They need someone on their side. you're not alone
Perhaps you can call the domestic violence hotline and get advice and more resources. There are safety plans online. Educate yourself about the cycle of violence and how the good times often make it difficult for the person to leave. Lenore Walker is the expert who has a lot to say about this topic.
There are support groups like CODA - for the codependent, a 12- step group for people who risk their own safety to be with someone who is bad for them. If there is substance abuse, Alanon is another group for her and the kids. There is so much to learn on this subject. Waking the Tiger by Peter Levine talks about the traumatic experience of violence and how disconnected one can become from their own body and experience. She probably has PTSD. I wish you well on this journey. Let me know if there is anything more you need. Anyway... Take care!! Michelle Lane
Tell your SIL as well as her children (separately), in private, that you will help in any way you can, and will provide a safe place for them to stay. You don't need to do this very often; it's not like they don't live with it everyday. Try to keep from being pushy and judgmental. If you push her too far, she'll probably shut down, out of shame, fear, and terror that her children will be taken away.
You need to be talking with your husband and any other siblings, and/or their parents. Tell them you need to call CPS because the children aren't safe, and that their family member needs their support, not their silence, in order to survive. Tell them that women are killed every single day by abusive husbands. Tell them that abused children turn into abusing adults. Tell them that their silence or denial keeps your SIL from growing the courage she needs to get out of the relationship. If you can unlock your in-laws code of silence, then perhaps they can all offer to assist your SIL safely out of this relationship.
In the end, understand that although you can dive in and try to save the kids, you can do nothing to persuade her to leave if she refuses to do so. I'm not saying be hands-off, I'm saying be careful -- women in these situations often protect their abusers, and if pushed, may strike out at you. They often are fiercely guarded and don't want to be intruded upon. They do, however, need to know that you are there and willing to help.
I have far more to say on this issue, but will leave it here. If you want to email me, please feel free. heather
My gut feeling is - don't bring it up to the husband ESPECIALLY in front of a group. Your sister-in-law will feel it later. In her husband's eye's, she is the cause of her own abuse. It is her fault, not his. She is the only person who can choose to leave the situation. She may be staying for a variety of reasons. For instance, are there children in common between this husband and wife? Often, courts will give the chilrden unsupervised visits with the abuser, especially if there is no legally documented history of abuse, who will then take out his anger on them since he can no longer abuse the Mother. The mother will go back into the relationship to spare the children the physical abuse.
You can help out by getting her to at least call a domestic violence shelter and have them help her safety plan. For instance, if he is beginning to get into a mood where violence is likely, then move into a safer room of the house (stay out of the kitchen where there are knives or a bathroom where there are no exits/lots of hard objects like tile). Her local shelter can also help her know what legal strategy and other resources she has at her disposal should she decide to leave.
I think that it takes nine attempts for the average victim of domestic violence to finally leave an abusive relationship. While working at my local shelter, I saw many repeat guests. I learned not to look down on them because they kept going back, but rather look up to them for trying. -anon
My daughter is now old enough to recognize that my brother is verbally abusive towards his wife, my mother and me. My husband is ready to have words with my adult brother. My brother says, ''shut up'' and ''f...u'' in anger and in front of our kids. I understand that siblings fight and his wife and my husband usually stay out it, but lately it is getting worse and much more public. He goes on and on in front of all of our kids and owns it by saying, ''That's just how I am, so I am a jerk! Sue me!'' He is an attorney who is always on the offensive attack. Should my husband stay out of it or tell him to watch his mouth? Will my brother see this as a declaration of war? I am tired of my child seeing us being disrespected. Big Sister
I think YOU need to handle this, not your husband. And regarding your child, Yes, his behavior will affect your child in any number of ways (will hate his uncle, will wonder why you take it, might even see that being a bully is effective, etc.) Not Taking It Anymore
Really, YOU need to tell your brother that you love him, and you love yourSELF too, and you're not going to let him treat you this way anymore. When he says he's just this way and he's a jerk, tell him you respect that, and that is his choice, because it means he cannot come around anymore. Don't let your kids be around that abuse. Seriously.
I think having your husband talk to him will only escalate the situation, so I would avoid that option. Your only choice is to hold him accountable for his actions. I'm sure this is a very difficult situation. Good luck! concerned
However, this effort to improve herself brought back a handful of past experiences that she didn't realize she was so angry about. Eventually she opted for counseling which was emotionally nerve wrecking for a while. In the long run, she became happier and the cussing just went away. Ana
My hunch is that he's set in his ways, in which case #1 would be the way to go. Hey, life has it's consequences. He'll just have to face these. JM
There is no easy way to do this. It will be made easier if you and your husband get on the same page about what you consider respectful behavior and what the consequences will be when (not if, when) your brother tests your limits.
By doing this, you and your husband would be giving a great gift not only to your family but to your daughter. Otherwise, she'll likely grow up thinking it is ''normal'' for an adult male to verbally abuse women.
You have the strength and courage to do this. And the family that is your priority now is your daughter and husband. Good luck. Rachel
Hi there, I am a full time step mother of 2 kids (6 and 8.5) , they live with my husband and i and usually see their mom every other weekend. I say usually because sometimes she misses visits or they dont want to go for various reasons. In general she is very absent from their lives, and when she is present, she is either neglectfull or abusive. That being said, here is the current situation that we need some advise on: My step daughter came back from her visit with her mother this past weekend saying that she had been spanked and that her mother had layed on her and squeezed her mouth shut to get her to stop crying. She said that her brother had been smacked on the back of the head and that They has been cussed at, being called f**kers. ( earlier this year she called Ana (8.5 years old) a bitch.) This is not the first time something like this has happened, though the time my husband and i called CPS we were told that things like this were considered a parenting style and not abuse. That abuse was somehow measured by the marks left, is this true?
We have communicated to her that we are NOT ok with any of these methods of parenting, and either have gotten the response of ''they are my kids i will disipline them how i want'', or, ''Ana is lieing'' ( she said that when Ana called afraid because her mom had gone next door to watch a movie at night and left them home alone). Most of the time though our e-mails get no response when dealing with this issue. Jason, their father has full legal and phyical custody. So, we dont know what to do. If we did something legal what would we do? We dont think that her not seeing them is good for them either, though, we cant stand by and let these things happen to the kids. We also cant afford a lawyer. We also worry that when she is angry at us,like when we bring these issues to her attention, that she takes it out on the kids.
We would love advise on any aspect of this situation, from legal to emotional...... thanks cris
My sister-in-law is mired in an abusive marriage. We've spoken about the numerous positive benefits that her and the kids would get if she and her husband divorced. But the problem is that since her marriage began 8 years ago, she has been very depressed and recently things have gotten worse. Her husband's business went into bankruptcy, (she worked for the company too), and she is now completely overwhelmed. Money problems, both unemployed, abusive husband that is horrible to her son from a previous relationship, younger kids out of control, I could go on.
She wants out but doesn't know what to do or where to begin. I think her depression is a big part of her inability to take action. Are there couselors for this type of thing? Or does she need a divorce lawyer right away? A place that has both? She needs a solid, step by step plan, and enough emotional support to be able to go through with it. Other family members will be no help.
We both agree that things will get even uglier with her husband. She's worried about him fighting to the bitter end (and he will) to get custody, and that divorce will be so expensive that she'll end up with nothing. I'm worried about her safety. He owns guns, and will not tell her where they are.
No negoiation/limit setting/mutual agreement works with this guy. Any advice to what steps she should take? concerned on the sidelines
Typically a center will provide counseling for the abuse vicitm and children, they will provide safety planning, help obtaining restraining orders, etc. These services are available regardless of whether a family chooses to stay in shelter. Additionally, they can get her appointments with legal aid to handle her divorce pro bono or very cheaply, help her find low- cost housing (the shelter which I work for also will provide furnishings down to the pots and pans for the new home), and put her in touch with organizations who will do everything to find her a suit for court appearences and set up interviews for her.
Good on you for helping your sister-in-law. Jan
I'm posting this for a good friend of mine who lives an hour away. She(''Jane'') met a man(''Bill'') in 2000. They very quickly moved in together, married, moved away from her family, and had a child. The first time I met him, I found him to be controlling, and I told my husband that I was worried about Jane. Bill was ''separated'' from his wife when he met Jane, although the wife called Jane, looking for ''my husband''. This past summer, they planned another pregnancy. A few months into it, their house burned down. Then their dog died. Bill then announced that he didn't want to be married anymore. The day after their second child was born, Bill left. A few months later, he returned, saying he wanted to work on things. The current situation is this...... -Bill has converted to Mormonism, and is giving them money. -Bill has had affairs with at least 3 women that Jane knows of. He is still involved with at least one of them. -Bill has decided to go to Iraq for a job, quitting his job here and leaving Jane and the kids with no benefits, etc. We don't know when he'll be leaving, as they've stopped letting people into the country for now. -The worst part is this. He has systematically been emotionally abusing Jane for months. He controls the money (she's a stay-at- home Mom). We don't know what will happen when he leaves for Iraq, although he is currently paying all the bills. He's threatening to file for divorce right before he leaves so that all their assets will be frozen. At first, he wouldn't come home, but now he's threatening her physically and refusing to leave. -Bill is a cop. I am NOT making a value judgement about all cops, just this one. He is very controlling of Jane. He issues his threats in a way that he knows can do him no harm. Jane has been so scared that she's tried to lock him out of the house, but he breaks in, saying that it's HIS home and he's not going anywhere! Last week, he said that he would kill her if she ever touched his stuff or called one of his girlfriends again. The next day, he reminded her of that. He also told her that she'd have no luck with the police because he had ''already laid the foundation'' with his coworkers, telling them that SHE had been threatening to harm HIM! Jane now knows that she has to leave him. She has applied for jobs, and she is planning to talk to a social worker. We, her friends, try to do whatever we can. How can Jane protect herself, physically and emotionally, from this abusive man, who happens to be a cop? How can she protect herself, financially, when he leaves the country? So far, her lawyer just says it's going to be tough because he's a cop. Any advice would appreciated.
That said, she needs to call her nearest shelter hotline to get advice. It is best for her to meet with an advocate, but if that is not possible, then she needs to talk to a person on the phone. They can help her develop a safety plan so that when she decides that the time is right that she can leave. Some abusers make a telephone call or trip to a meeting nearly impossible.
The shelter can provide temporary housing if necessary. They are confidential locations -- a cop may know where it is, but he will not be permitted on the premises unless he has a darn good reason (dropping off a victim and then they are not allowed inside or serving a warrant). Even the serving a warrant thing is very tough.
Also, some jurisdictions will have an advocate at the courthouse who will help a victim of DV with a restraining order, help with safety planning, etc.
Safety planning is two-fold. It will teach her to survive in her current situation (ie, when an argument takes place, try not to be in the kitchen or bathroom b/c more pain can be inflicted in these places, there aren't good escape routes, there are lots of weapons, etc) while also helping her find the best time to leave if she chooses to leave. Only she knows her situation and it may take some time for her to lay the groundwork to be able to leave. That may take some time. A woman is most at risk to be murdered by her husband when she is trying to leave the abusive situation. She must plan her escape carefully.
Things may be more difficult b/c he is a cop, but it is not impossible. Your friend is going to need upstanding members of the community standing behind her when she asks for that restraining order, etc. Her husband is probably a known quantity at the courthouse while she is not. Your friend is also going to need your support and understanding if it takes her more than one try when it comes to leaving him (the average is about 9 tries). There may be reasons that she goes back. For instance, the court may award him unsupervised visits of the children. If that happens, she is probably going to go back, because when he can't abuse her, then in all likelihood he will turn on his children. She will go back to him to protect them. He will leave the kids alone if he can torment their mother.
Jane will be fine, eventually. If Bill is convicted of domestic violence, he will lose his livelihood as he will no longer be allowed to carry a gun (cops aren't much good in this country if they can't carry a weapon), but she will receive a lot of help on the other end. She may be on welfare for a while (that is what it is for and she shouldn't be embarrassed to take it while she gets back on her feet.) while people help to find her a job, daycare etc. The advocates at my shelter know everyone in town who is willing to help out victims of DV. They help them find apartments at reduced rates in good neighborhoods. They know the employers willing to take on someone who is 'a bit fragile at the moment.'
The best thing that you can do is offer to be there to help if she needs someone to talk to...have the number for her shelter at the ready. She may be too embarrassed to admit that there is physical abuse and shy away from talking to the shelter. You can let her know that shelters are just a great resource for people in a situation where the husband is a 'bit controlling' and that they may be able to help her find some peace.
Just an aside, 'Bill' may be mad at you for any help that you provide, but generally you are not at any risk. He is laser- locked on controlling and hurting one person. You aren't that person. Jan
I am in a verbally abusive marriage that has gotten out of control since our son was born 3 months ago. My husband is irrational and threatening and has started to shove me and while Im sure he didn't mean it, in a recent fit of anger he actually threatened to kill me and the baby. Anything I say or do to defend myself is ultimately turned around and used against me.
The only solution I can see is for me to leave, since there is no way he'll ever go. I have family in Southern California and Colorado that can provide me and my child with a place to stay until things can get sorted out. I'd leave now but Im afraid that if I just go somehow Ill be accused of kidnapping.
Can anyone tell me how far, how long and under what circumstances I can legally take my child without my husband's permission, OR how I can make him go.
Seperately if anyone can recommend an AGRESSIVE but honest divorce attorney I'd be grateful (I have reviewed the digest list of divorce attorneys). Not gonna take it anymore
Please get out for the sake of your child. There have been too many cases in which the spouse stayed because of fear or uncertainty. Let me tell you, there is light at the end of the tunnel-Run as fast as you can! Concerned Mother
What I would recommend is that you talk to a lawyer and make a plan for leaving. YOu may want to talk to a lawyer both here and in the area where you are planning to go. anon
--If you don't feel safe, please trust your instincts. These numbers have people who can talk to you about all of your options. It's OK to call even if you aren't sure about what has been happening to you or what to do. Good luck--My thoughts are with you! Rebecca
Getting yourself and your baby out of the way sounds like a smart short-term solution. However, someone who is hurting so badly that he does these terrible things to other people might continue harming himself and others, even when you are out of the way. It sounds to me like getting an ''aggressive'' divorce lawyer is your way of trying to get even with him. (''My lawyer is bigger than your lawyer'' which is another way of saying might is right.)
From what I've seen, this will merely set the stage for years and years of bitter battles over child support. It would seem to me that your better long-term bet would be to an civilized parting (if part you must). Obviously, that can only happen once he has been ''civilized''. And that's where I would start.
This is what I would do in your situation: If he gets abusive again, dial 911. Once he is no longer a physical threat, find a way to get him some treatment so that he can deal with whatever is turning him into this monster. Remember that your child can only ever have one dad, no matter how whacked out he may be.
If you are loath to call the cops, try a rape crisis hotline or battered women hotline. DON'T put up with it any more! Anon
In terms of getting hubby out of the house, you could get a restraining order. It does not matter that he has not physically abused you- he has threatened to kill you & is vebally abusive, & that is enough. Think about whether it will cause him to escalate, though.
As far as you leaving, since you both have custody, you can both take the baby. (Scary thought since he could take the baby, too.) If you do leave, make sure you aren't leaving a trail- that means not using credit cards, ATMs, cell phones- anything that will have a bill that will show your location. Abusive partners tend to want to 'track down' the person they were hurting.
I would suggest calling a domestic violence program to get more info on leaving (you need a safety plan), divorce, etc. If you decide you want to stay & try to work it out they also have resources on counseling for him. DO NOT agree to couples counseling- that can just turn into a forum for your husband to get more fodder to verbally/emotionally hurt you. There are also free support groups & counseling you can access even if you stay.
Best of luck & feel free to e-mail me if you would like. Virginia
As far as taking your baby and leaving goes, my M-I-L says that the legally best way to do things is to go to a women's shelter first. It doesn't sound inviting or like any experience any woman is longing to have (but then again who ever wants to be abused?), but they will believe you, will protect you and your baby and will advocate for you. They will help you get a court order keeping your husband away from you and the baby. My M-I-L also said that it will be too easy for your husband to track you down through family if you just go straight to family, and that doing it that way, it is possible that you could be charged with kidnapping because there is no documented legal reason for you to be keeping your child from his father.
It's obviously harder to go the shelter route because you then have to out your husband as an abuser. But, it seems to me to be the more permanent way to end things, that simply going to stay with family isn't enough. My M-I-L is certain that his occasional shoves will turn into hitting, beating...
You have a precious little baby to protect now. And especially since he's a boy, you do not want him around an abusive man only to grow up being abused and then to become an abuser himself. Please, stand by your words and DO NOT TAKE IT ANYMORE. No one deserves even the slightest bit of abuse!
God be with you, Jennifer
Here are some of the things she'd wished she'd been able to plan ahead for, once she realized how unstable her husband was. One: document every weird thing he says and does. Write it down in a notebook which you keep hidden. Every now and then, take the notebook to a copy place and give copies to a friend to keep. Two: Tell a friend or relative what's happening, and every time something scary or weird happens. Don't be ashamed and try to keep a secret. Others need to know so they can help you and they can testify. Three: Make a copy of all your legal documents - your driver's license, credit cards, birth certificates for you and child, bank statements, everything. If you have to leave in a hurry, you may not be able to even grab your purse. Make sure a copy of all these documents is somewhere safe (wish a friend, relative). Three: Watch your bank statements. Is money disappearing - he may be trying to keep assets from you. Four: Do not hesitate to leave, and/or call 911 if things get scary again. Your safety and your child's safety comes first. You are not ''kidnapping'' the child if you go to a shelter. Have the phone number and address of A Safe Place on you at all times (536-7233) Call if you're worried or scared. Five: Be aware that even if you leave, you probably won't be able to make him go away. But you can fight for yourselve and your child with the help of your friends, family, documents, and a good attorney.
You need to get out of this marriage. You and your child deserve to be safe. =Bless You=
I am bothered by my husbands name calling and bad language. We have the usuall problems most couples have such as house work and helping with child care. He is also not a very affectionet person and I usually have to ask for a kiss or hug. He is telling me I am bad, even when he sais it in a funny way it still hurts. When we argue about our issues he usually calls me names such as bitch or nag. He tells me to shut up, mind my buisness or he sais f--k you. I told him many times to comunicate differently about the problems we have. The sad thing is that he sais these nasty words right in front my 1 year old daughter. If I tell him that I don't like the word fuck he just tells me in a very calm way that I just don't understand different words. Do a lot of couples fight in this way or am I one of very few. When I asked his family for advice ( his grandmother which he grew up with ) she just said that's normal for todays society. It's impossible to sit down and talk about this issue with him, because he never has time and he gets extremly defensive. I often cry about it and than he also gets upset because I am not happy. Why does he treat me with such disrespect ?
Let me just get to the heart of the matter: Your husband's treatment of you is not love. It is useful to think of ''love'' as a verb more than as an emotion, and with this in mind, you should realize that he is not LOVING you! Others who reply to you, I'm sure, will also say this: His behavior constitutes ABUSE.
If you continue to allow his verbal abuse, your daughter will grow up thinking that his behavior is normal, and that this is how people who love each other behave. It is not. People who love each other do not call each other ugly names, they do not say ''fuck you,'' they do not have to be cajoled into loving behaviors such as a kiss or a hug.
I advise you to seek marital counselling immediately, but I have to say from my own experience, this may not work. He may refuse to go, or he may go and refuse to participate. Sometimes the best thing about counselling is that when you look back on it all later, you know you did everything you could to save the marriage.
I used to be treated very much as you are now. I was afraid of divorce for many reasons -- the opinion of family and friends, my own self-image, etc. Most especially, I was afraid of raising a child alone. What I discovered is that raising a child alone is infinitely more joyful than raising a child with a verbally abusive spouse.
I know you haven't asked about divorce, but I want to note that if you decide to get divorced, be prepared for all his ugly behavior to become magnified by a factor of ten. It goes without saying that you should get a good lawyer, but get a good support group of friends to help you out emotionally (as well as logistically), too. He may well make your life hell to every degree that he can, for as long as he can, which might be for the next 17 years ('til your daughter is an adult). But YOU CAN DO IT and YOU WILL BE HAPPIER.
You deserve to be loved, and your daughter deserves to be loved.
If you don't get help for yourself now, do it for your daughter. You risk setting an example for her that it is OK for a woman to be yelled at and mis-treated by a man. You don't wish that for your daughter (or for yourself).
Your husband may not wish to be mis-treating you. If you seek help, both you and he may find other ways to relate to each other.
Please consider calling a domestic abuse hotline to talk to someone - even if you don't think you are being abused. Or you may consider seeing a therapist (there are therapists available to UC students and faculty and their families at Tang Center; and free and low-cost therapists available in Berkeley and Oakland).
"Domestic abuse" is a pattern of power and control. One person controls the other through intimidation, threats, insults, emotional or sexual abuse, economic control, isolation or physical violence.
You are in an abusive relationship if your partner has: -frequently criticized, shouted or called you names -withheld approval, sex or affection as punishment -humiliated you in private or in public -ridiculed or insulted your most valued beliefs -isolated you from family or friends -controlled where you go -controlled your money -shoved, slapped, punched, kicked, burned or hit you -thrown objects at or near youStatistically, 20-30% of women experience "domestic violence." It is possible that includes you. Nobody wants that to be true. But you deserve better.
In Alameda County, you can call a 24-hour CRISIS HOTLINE at any time, day or night: (510)536-7233.
[This information comes from a pamphlet that I helped write from Shalom Bayit ("peace in the home") a group of Jewish women who support battered women and those who assist them.] M.
Regarding your child: I definitly would NOT want my child growing up thinking this was the appropriate way for a husband to treat his wife. Your husband's treatment will not only effect your self esteem, but your daughters as well.
I know there are non-profit organizations which can provide support for little or no fee. Try looking in the phone book or perhaps someone on-line will have a recommendation. Good luck, linda
I always follow up the conversation later when we are both calm and relaxed and explain, yet again, why his behavior is totally inappropriate and unacceptable. We try to lay 'ground rules' we both follow when fighting - ie not doing/saying the things we know will set the other off.
The bottom line: it is up to you to be the more adult one and maintain your cool even if it means walking away from the situation. Your husband is pushing your buttons on purpose. Just as with a child, you have to show him that button won't work anymore by staying calm and not reacting the way he wants you to.
I'm sorry your husband talks to you this way as there are way better ways to communicate much more effectively. obviously anon
You deserve to be treated with respect. Anonymous
In my opinion you have two options:
1. Get out of that relationship.
2. If you want to stay in the relationship, get marriage counseling (both of you). If your husband doesn't want counseling, back to 1.
Here is why: Your issue is much more than bad language. Your issue is disrespect and not being able to communicate. If you don't change a thing, how is your daughter supposed to have any respect for you later if you let yourself be called a bad person without standing up for yourself. You owe it to your daughter that she can grow up in a better environment than that.
However, my therapist said it was completely unacceptable to call my spouse names. She said it was abuse, pure and simple. Over many years, I have learned to walk away when I am angry (most times). I still yell but I rarely call my spouse names anymore. When I do yell in front of (or at) my daughter, I always talk to her afterwards and explain it is not her fault.
I would encourage you to talk to a therapist so you can get support in dealing with this. Hopefully your husband will acknowledge it is not okay to treat you this way. But if he doesn't, you might want to consider how best to take care of yourself.
I also firmly beleive this behavior is harmful to your child. She will soon learn to talk and will be a little mimic. Maybe this will motivate your husband to refrain from this behavior while in her presence. If it does not, you might need support from a profeesional therapist on how to deal with this. A therapist named Deborah Joy (in the white pages) specializes in abusive relationships. You may not feel you has reached that point, but it might help you to talk to her. Best of luck! anon
When I left, he was HORRIBLE. Each time he called, he threatened to take the baby, he called me names. He'd be kind to me and tried to reconcile with me, and I'd let him in, but I'd slame the door if he even got CLOSE to HINTING at abusive behavior. Since my leaving, his work forced him to look at other people and their relationships (he's anti-psychology because his mother is a psychologist and he doesn't get along with her since she took my side). He began to grow on his own and began talking to other men in healthy relationships (another thing I used to tell him all the time.) He'd tell them his side only, but, eventually, his lies where transparent because he could never get the baby to come near him unless I was there.
Slamming the door on him and his crap, in addtion to my openly dating other men, has made him see that he had to change to get me and our daughter back. I CONSTANTLY remind him that he is lucky I'm around, and I also remind him that if he cannot be a soft place for me to fall, he is useless in my life - period. We are not living together again, but he is a new person. It has taken a year an a half, and I still don't think he deserves us, but we spend time with him now. We never would have gotten to this point if I had not left. Staying with him, no matter WHAT you tell him, gives him the message that you condone his horrible treatment of you and your daughter (it hurts the baby when he does this to you - believe me, it hurts her. If he raises his voice for any reason to me, our baby tells him to stop, and he does). We have a long way to go, and I may still end up with someone else, but he is more human than ever before since I left. If we do not end up together, I now know that he will at least be human to me because I've stood up to him and called his every bluff.
He may not love you, but YOU must love YOU AND YOUR DAUGHTER enough to leave. Men like this are taking out their insecurities on you, and they cannot heal and become men if they have women like us to kick. He need to figure out how to grow some self-esteem so that he doesn't feel so powerless that his only power is the power he has over you and your daughter. If you don't have the money to leave, find a friend or family who will take you and get out. Perhaps counseling will help, but from where I sit, leaving is the only way to preserve you sanity and self-esteem for you and your daughter. Christina
I want to comfirm what they all (or almost all) have said: your husband is abusive and disrespectful. He may say you are important to him or that he does respect you, but loving and respectful people care about your feelings and try NOT to do things that they know bother you. I found the book that someone else mentioned: 'The Verbally Abusive Relationship' to be very valuable in understanding what was going on in my marriage.
Given that, I do have a few of things to add:
1. If you do get your husband to go to couples therapy with you (and I would encourage you to try) please evaluate your therapist and SEE SOMEONE ELSE if this one is not working for you. There are wonderful people out there, but there are also people like one of the 4 we went to, whose action item for my husband's verbal abuse was to suggest anti-depressants for me so I wouldn't mind so much.
2. Know that YOU CANNOT MAKE YOUR HUSBAND CHANGE. I spent so much time and energy trying to figure out ways I could act; things to do or say, that might make my husband behave differently. This is what they call 'co-dependant' behavior, and was a waste of time. He has to understand that the way he is behaving is wrong, and want to change, and then there is a chance. And you cannot get him to that place.
3. Contemplating being a single mother is scary, but, if your husband will not stop his abuse, separating from him might be what you need to do. I, too, weighed the alternatives: I knew it would be better for me personally to live apart from my husband but could not do it until I decided that it was better for my daughters to have their parents live apart than to grow up in a household where their father was mean to their mother every day. In my case separating was what I needed to do. It has been rough, but I have never regretted doing it for a minute.
4. Talk to people. Get a therapist of your own if you can. You may decide to do some therapy on your own first.
Good luck to you and best wishes. Been there, too
All the advice to the person with the abusive husband is sound and correct. Getting out of the abusive situation is the best.
All abuse not not consist of yelling, threatening and hitting. I am in the unfortunate situation of having my personality abused - as opposed to my person. I live with a control freak who has systematically cut me off from any friends I had prior to marriage, ridicules any and every hobby or activity I want to take up and has created essentially a prison for me by setting up situations where I am the one who has to be there for the kids. He gets to go to all his football games, visit all his relatives who live in town, play golF etc. while I get no rec time or ''fun'' time at all. I could not financially take care of my children on my own salary.
I do not have any family to go to. I can't leave town because I have a job in the area where I am treated like a human being and I have to keep that for benefits and retirement, etc. There is no way I could leave my children in the care of my husband and the influence of his own dysfunctional family upon them. Plus I am really afraid that if I did take the kids and leave, whether I pressed for divorce or not, we would be out on the street and I would never get the husband out of the house. There would be a big legal battle - not over custody of the kids but over the house which he would then try to take control of.
I put most of the work into fixing the place up and making it a home for my kids. My husband does very little axcept pick up the kids from school, watch them for about 1 1/2 hours in the evening until I get home from work and on Saturday mornings for 4 hours. Then he goes ''somewhere.'' My husband has lots of family in the area and since he is always over a one of their homes I think he should move out and live with them. The one time I kicked him out because he was taking advantage of my mom who was visitng - he basically treated her like a maid - he went to stay with his parents for 2 days, but when my mom left - he came back. He thought my mom was the problem.
Essentially I feel like I am a single parent living with a partially absentee emotionally abusive, controlling, self-serving husband. I do most of the mom work, housekeeping, yardwork (''man's work - building , repairing things, ec.) and yet I am financiallly dependent on this person to pay for childcare, groceries etc. I pay half the mortgage, my own car payment, the phone bill, the kids clothes, toys etc and some groceries and my own gas and car insurance. After that I have nothing left. I am also too physically drained on a daily basis to proactively go out and find legal assistance.
I think there are many others in this situation where they would be divorced, but the high cost of living in the Bay Area has them trapped in less than moderate relationships. I, myself would appreciate any advice from anyone out there familiar with this sort of situation. I already have all of the abuse hotline information, battered women's shelter numbers, etc. etc. The problem is that police don't come unless you are being physically injured or threatened. The abuse in our household is one of emotional neglect, disrespect and control by a self-centered dictator which essentially just wears you down and breaks you so that you have no energy left to stand up for yourself or your kids anymore and leaves you imprisoned in a very closed environment where your ideas are not important, your thought are not heard, your needs are not met - because they are not those of the one doing the controlling.
If your husband is like mine, things will not improve. It doesn't matter whether you learn to be assertive or whether you continue to be accomodating, any effort to get your needs met will be shot down and you will continue to be manipulated. The phrase that keeps echoing through my head is ''anything you say can and will be used against you''. It's a no win situation, and its bound to get worse.
Talk to an attorney (there have been several listed in recent recommendations digests). Aim for divorce with the knowledge that things may be harder, even excrutiatingly painful. You may go into debt, or compromise your standard of living. But I know in my heart that nothing will ever be as bad as being in a relationship where you have lost yourself.
Remember, other than the lifestyle your husband's income provides, you already feel like a single parent. LET THE HOUSE GO (that's been a big challenge for me). Its just a house and not nearly as important as the emotional well being of you and your children. If you're anything like me there was a time in your life when you got anything you put your mind to, start scanning craigslist for places to live. Make a plan, don't wait any longer. You're not alone
One question that came up for me after reading your post was ''do you get sick leave from your job?'' You mentioned feeling too exhausted after work to consult with a lawyer. I'm thinking that if I felt that way, I'd take a sick day off and consult with a lawyer! For one thing, with California's community property laws, if your husband insiststs on keeping the house, doesn't he have to buy you out?(Which would be helpful for getting started on your own somewhere - perhaps closer to your family?). I don't know your situation, of course. You may feel that your husband would try to avoid giving you any money (which seems a likely tactic for a control freak). I believe, however, that you can send a sherrif over to collect for you, if he doesn't cough up the divorce settlement.
Well, regardless, this will likely be a very difficult situation to extract yourself from. I hope you are able to get yourself and your kids away from your husband. alesia
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The Internet is filled with amateur reviewers: bloggers, chowhounds, yelpers, tweeters, and trip advisors. Few of us would eat at a restaurant or stay at a hotel without checking some reviews and ratings beforehand. (And most of us know to take them with a grain, or a hill, of salt.) But should some online reviewers be getting special treatment at the places they choose to review?
Brad Newman thinks so.
Newman, a California-based entrepreneur, has invented the ReviewerCard, an exclusive membership card for online critics whose provenance was inspired by the shoddy service he received on vacation. Cardholders are encouraged to flash their ReviewerCard, which boldly says "I Write Reviews," to service staff (waiters, front-desk agents, and the like). According to its website, the pass, which conspicuously resembles the American Express "black" card, ensures that members "will get to enjoy the premium service they deserve, while continuing to provide insightful, honest, and valuable reviews to other customers." In other words: The restaurant or hotel in question will be forced to heap freebies and fawning service upon these reviewers and presumably not throw boiling-hot soup in their faces.
Of course, there is nothing insightful, honest, or valuable about the ReviewerCard.
Holding some online sway is hardly a reason to get preferential treatment or an ever-elusive upgrade. Not only does the card acknowledge to your server or concierge that you're as handout-hungry as a C-list celebrity, but it also guarantees a false experience that the rest of the world might not receive. Furthermore, whipping out a ReviewerCard could be seen as some sort of thinly veiled threat: "Give me your best or I'll review you poorly" (or worse, "Give me free things or I'll give you one star/bubble/point"). Since when is it OK to hold your provider hostage for good service or cushy upgrades?
This leads to the sort of dishonesty that many readers fear when browsing online reviews. Worse, it threatens the "anyone-can-do" ethos of online-review communities. It's hard enough to verify the truthfulness of your average reviewer; we shouldn't have to suss out which one-star reviews are really the result of a waiter failing to acknowledge self-styled VIPs as the special sparkly snowflakes they are.
That's not to say that the only "good" reviewers are the professional ones (they're not), or that amateur reviews aren't useful (they are, definitely). It's just that the non-pros aren't beholden to ethics standards: No one is required to disclose that their five-star review is the result of elite self-identification and not at all representative of your average Joe's experience. And while Newman maintains that the card "is not intended for freebies, but rather to ensure the experience goes seamlessly for everyone," the only thing that it ensures is that some people will receive better service than others.
As of press time, at least 100 reviewers have snapped up the card, although it's been getting a healthy amount of backlash online. At its launch, membership carried a $100 fee, although yesterday Newman announced via press release that it would be free … to the select few who are approved.
Regardless of its price tag, hopefully reviewers will see the ReviewerCard for what it is: a shameless, grafty, grabby attempt at entitlement—and swag.
You Might Also Like:
- OP-ED: It's My Right to Recline My Seat
- OP-ED: Treat Passengers of Size with Dignity
- OP-ED: Frequent Flyers Should Not Board First


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April 20, 2012
Sudans on Brink of All-Out War
Peter Goodspeed, National Post
AP Photo
No one is even trying to maintain the pretense of peace in Sudan and South Sudan these days. Sporadic skirmishes and border shootouts are on the verge of becoming all-out war and the threat is resurrecting fears of a Darfur-like disaster for 10s of thousands of refugees.
TAGGED: Sudan, Africa, Southern Sudan, South Sudan


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I'm another step closer to my porch being finished for this autumn season. When decorating it's all about layering and I'm no expert but I've figured this much out.
Burlap is inexpensive and versatile. I measured the pots and cut burlap squares so they would cover the entire pot. I painted polka-dots on and wrapped the base of each mum. I secured them with adhesive dots and added ribbon to most of them but they actually look cute without ribbon. I wrap my mums in burlap every year but this is my first time painting the burlap. This is much easier than re-potting each flower and by far—less expensive.
Here's the other side of the porch. I really love the color mums provide in the fall.
Cute and so simple.
I added some polka-dot ribbon to a couple pots.
Mixing the mums with existing potted plants, an old watering can and small lanterns.
Welcome to our home!
Linked up to The 36th Avenue Sticker Party & Thrifty Decor Chick.
Thanks for stopping by Blue Sky Confections!
Jenny K.


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TEACHING MATTERS Newsletter
U.S. Department of Education sent this bulletin at 11/07/2011 01:25 PM EST
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November 7, 2011 |
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Teaching Matters
Lisa Jones Grows Her Own at Watkins Elementary
about how District of Columbia teacher Lisa Jones works her unique brand of magic to blend teaching academics and soft skills with her third grade class.
No doubt about it, the best part of my job as teacher liaison for ED is getting to watch teachers who are really great at their jobs caught up in the art of teaching.
This happened not long ago, when I tagged along for a morning in the third grade classroom of Lisa Jones, a District of Columbia Public Schools teacher at Watkins Elementary. As I arrived, Jones's kids were collecting basil from their community garden, but Jones was harvesting something else altogether.
ESEA Waivers: What They Mean to Teachers
Teacher Question (TQ):
What is
ESEA Flexibility,
what some are calling Waivers?
ESEA Flexibility is the offer to relieve states from some of the provisions of the No Child Left Behind law that aren't working. Until Congress passes a law reauthorizing (and fixing) NCLB, states are being given an option to request waivers of certain portions of the law, provided they have certain plans
in place to better prepare our children for college and careers.
Who can apply for ESEA Flexibility?
My state?
My school?
My union?
A Perspective on Teacher Turnover
Read Gamal Sherif's blog conversation
about the effects of teachers losing their jobs at Bodine High School in Philadelphia.
Top 5 Teacher Quotes
Wisdom from Teachers (Heard by ED)
Talking about the importance of good school leadership:
"If you have to remind me that you are the principal, then you probably aren't." (Camden, NJ)
Responding to how technology is going to transform the profession:
"The most important teacher will always be a teacher." (Jonesboro, AR)
Explaining the difference between working for the US Department of Education and teaching in a high-needs school:
"That (working for ED) is a Pentagon job, but I work in Fallujah!" (Washington, DC)
Discussing the need to pay teachers fairly:
"What we do is important. It's time to be trained and compensated for taking on our nation's most important work." (New York, NY)
Pointing out that raising teacher pay will not solve all of teachers' problems:
"My concern is preventing burnout; more money will not make me less burned out." (Chicago, IL)
Wanted: Principals Who Aspire to Inspire
Read the
of Teaching Ambassador Fellow Greg Mullenholz (pictured right) about encountering a recurring theme for him this month: the need for good school leadership.
Our Future, Our Teachers
the plan
to improve the preparation and induction that new teachers receive from traditional and nontraditional programs and districts.
Inside the President's Plan to Fix Crumbling Schools and Save Teacher Jobs
In this video
, Secretary Duncan talks to community college students at Wake Tech (N.C.) about the importance of fixing our schools and keeping our teachers in the classroom.
Read the blog by Teaching Ambassador Fellow Angela McClary-Rush:
Students at Wake Tech Community College Talk Reform and Jobs
Teaching Ambassador Fellow Sharla Steever
recounts the plight
of Dolores Gonzales Elementary in New Mexico, making a case for the American Jobs Act.
Teaching Ambassadors Recommend Reading
Laurie Calvert
Teachers Don't Do It For The Money" So...
Andrew Rotherham's insightful blog reminds readers that while teachers didn't enter the profession to get rich, there are solid reasons for paying them well. Posted in September, his message is timeless.
Claire Jellinek
: McKinsey & Company's research report
Closing the Talent Gap
(from September 2010) is quickly becoming one of the studies I hear people talking about both in and outside of the Department.
Geneviève DeBose
Putting Middle Grades Students on the Graduation Path: A Policy and Practice Brief.
In this brief from 2009,
Robert Balfanz and the Association for Middle Level Education (formerly the National Middle School Association) highlight the importance of focusing on the often-forgotten middle grades when working towards increasing high school graduation rates. Balfanz's ability to talk policy
practice makes this read accessible to many and applicable to all.
Greg Mullenholz
The Road to Charlottesville
paper from 1999 really helped me to frame the move towards standards prior to NCLB. It's more of a historical/contextual piece than it is a cutting edge research piece.
Steve Owens
Peer Review: Getting Serious About Teacher Support and Evaluation
. This paper reaches three important conclusions based on in-depth analysis of two established PAR programs in California: 1) Peer support and evaluation can and should coexist.
2) PAR is a rigorous alternative to traditional forms of teacher evaluation and development. 3) PAR leads to better collaboration between districts and unions.
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Safe to use gravel from Home Depot in aquariums?
Don't remember what the bag of gravel was called, but its comprised of random types and sizes of rock, I read that limestone can mess with the PH, though I don't know what small chunks of limestone look like.. of course it would be properly strained and rinsed beforehand. [/i]
River rock maybe? Finer gravel is better. Pea gravel should be fine. You may be able to mix the gravel from HD with aquarium gravel.
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[author] [author_image timthumb='on']http://www.ideasevolved.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/pic.png[/author_image] [author_info]By Muhammad Hassan. The writer is currently doing his A Levels from Beaconhouse ALGC.[/author_info] [/author]
The Indian Foreign Minister S.M.Krishna was in Pakistan on a 3-day visit and met with the President Zardari, and Prime Minister Raja Pervaiz Ashraf, the Foreign Minister Hina Rabbani Khar and the leaders of major political parties. In addition to this, the Foreign Sectaries of the two countries signed a much awaited visa accord that will significantly simplify travel for people on both sides of the border.
No one expected a big breakthrough from Krishna's visit and there was none, but the fact that both countries realize the importance of talking to each other augurs well for the future of the Indo-Pak relationship. Similarly, the signing of the visa accord shows that both countries are willing to translate all that talk into some action.
For 65 years, India and Pakistan have been at loggerheads over various issues and the same issues continue to dog their relationship today, but in spite of this, it is important that both countries keep up this dialogue. Although traditional issues like Kashmir, Siachen and Sir Creek remain, it is not possible in the current global context for Pakistan and India to remain in a constant state of enmity.
It is especially encouraging to note that both sides understand the importance of trade with each other and steps taken by India in this regard such as granting business visas and allowing foreign direct investment from Pakistan must be appreciated. On the other hand, Pakistan has decided to grant Most Favored Nation status to India due to which India will be able to export an estimated 6800 items to Pakistan, up from 2000 at the present. Bilateral trade is expected to rise to $ 6 Billion in the next three years from $ 2.7 Billion.
"Trade Diplomacy" will probably play a large part in the future development of the Indo-Pak relationship and that's very well considering the economic situation in Pakistan. In India too, growth has slowed, deficits are running high and the rupee has fallen in recent months. Increased trade is, therefore, important to the economic wellbeing of both countries. In addition to that, the strengthening of economic ties will bring the countries closer to each other and build enough confidence to tackle long standing issues such as Siachen.
Coming back to Krishna's visit, he even met PCB chairman Zaka Ashraf who urged him to make it easier for Pakistani fans to get visas to see the upcoming Indo-Pak cricket tournament. During talks with the President, he stressed that India wanted good relations with India.
Krishna also said that all issue cannot be resolved at once and that India and Pakistan are moving forward in a gradual manner and this highlights how important it is for both countries to keep talking to each other. Progress might be slow at first since there's a massive trust deficit between us and the governments of both countries are weak at this time, what with elections looming and a dismal performance record, but in time, we may build enough confidence to actually tackle issues like Siachen and Kashmir, the solutions to which have eluded us for decades.
It may be rightly pointed out that not much has changed on the ground after this visit, but this is just the beginning and provided that we keep working with each other, the day just might come when we are able to put a bitter past behind us and start a new life as cordial neighbors.


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Professional Experience
I am a home education consultant, speaker, and writer; my recent appearances include workshop sessions for home school conventions in Virginia, California, West Virginia, North Carolina, and elsewhere. I am also the co-author of The Well-Trained Mind: A Guide to Classical Education at Home (with co-author Susan Wise Bauer), published by W.W. Norton in July, 1999. Until my consulting load grew too heavy, I tutored privately in English and mathematics. I also served as the principal of a private cooperative school for two years, a position which included both administrative duties and the teaching of elementary classes on all subjects. I taught three children at home from elementary school through high school; all three completed college degrees, and two went on to complete graduate degrees as well. Before educating my own children, I taught preschool at a private school in New Orleans. Over the years I've also taught second, fourth, fifth, and sixth grade classes at public schools in three states; Virginia, Tennessee, and Louisiana. For a short period, I also taught the children of international hospital workers in Haiti. I am currently at work on my own home school book — the story of my journey into home education.
I graduated magna cum laude from Carson-Newman College in Tennessee in 1959; I was a member of the Mortar Board Honor Society and of Pi Kappa, the national honor debate fraternity. Since then, I've taken courses for state teacher certification at Tulane University in New Orleans, the College of William & Mary in Virginia, and the University of Virginia. I have completed teacher workshops on learning disabilities, and have worked with dyslexic students. I've also been trained in school administration (courses taken in Pensacola, Florida). Recently, I've completed a series of seminars in parenting skills which I use as a resource when advising home-schooling parents and students.
I grew up in isolated rural Virginia, raised by elderly relatives who were subsistence farmers. We had no indoor bathroom, and we travelled to town only twice a year — for Christmas presents and spring shoes. I was the valedictorian of my 1955 high school class, and the only girl to go on to college. I met my husband Jay in college, and taught school for six years while he went through his medical training. After he finished medical school, Jay went into the Navy. Over the next few years we lived in New Orleans, Tennessee, Maine, Virginia, Boston, and Puerto Rico. We also spent a short time at the Albert Schweitzer Memorial Hospital in Haiti, and decided to sponsor the education of two Haitian boys (both are now American citizens and successful professionals). In Boston we adopted our youngest daughter, a biracial child. When Jay got out of the service, we moved back to the Virginia farm where I grew up. Jay began a rural general practice and we started homesteading — we raised livestock, killed our own pigs, and had an enormous garden, while I taught our three children at home. Over the years we've given a temporary home to numerous people — including a South American doctor who wanted to learn English, and ex-CIA officer who needed a place for his entire family, ex-flower children, and students of all kinds. Now that my children are grown, I serve as an elder in my local church, assist my husband in his second career (as an artist!), and help educate my grandchildren.
Go back to About Us


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1 Review
Wow! I was so impressed with how easy and how supercalifragilisticexpiali-delicious this recipe was! I halved the recipe, using 1 each yellow and orange bell peppers (smallish ones). I used heirloom cherry tomatoes instead of large tomatoes, halving or quartering them into small bite-size pieces. I used chevre. DH also loved this recipe, and even DS liked the bite I gave him. The only (really minor) changes I can think I might like to try would be to increase the anchovies (we love them so) and possibly decrease the chevre to maybe 1/2 the amount called for. However, I was very impressed with these and can't wait to make them again. They were just perfect with grilled steaks! Thank you so much for posting, bluemoon! Made for Newest Zaar Tag game.


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"It was pretty much the worst night of my entire summer," says Ronnie Blake, a young man from Southern California, of the night of the latest Lindsay Lohan DUI bust, to TMZ founder and king of all media Harvey Levin. But was it the best night of Harvey's summer? Tough to say. Ronnie's story is that he and his friends Dante and Jakon had been invited by Lindsay to a party they then weren't allowed into, so they were just sitting in the car, chillaxin, and waiting for Lindsay's assistant's boyfriend to stop arguing with Lindsay's assistant when... suddenly Lindsay jacked their car, ran it over Ronnie's foot and up the Pacific Coast Highway at 100 miles an hour, occasionally uttering such charming statements as "I'm a celebrity. I'm not going to get in trouble," and "If you touch me, I'll sue you." When the cops finally caught up to them, Lindsay said "the black kid" had been driving — when she had just run over his FUCKING FOOT.
It's all very mysterious and bizarre until you remember.
- Um duh someone here is a cocaine dealer.
- Cocaine is a hell of a drug.


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All Comments (31)
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i love it!


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Community Supports Red Knot Conservation
Deb Reynolds
Photo Credit: Gregory Breese, USFWS
A group of conservation organizations is building a base of red knot fans in the Delaware Bay. While this may sound like a strategy for a sports team, this group is dedicated to the conservation of a rare shorebird that faces serious declines in its populations.
The red knot (Calidris canutus ssp. rufa) stops to rest in the Delaware Bay during its 9,000-mile (14,500-kilometer) journey from their wintering grounds in the southern tip of South America to their breeding grounds in the Arctic. The Delaware Bay provides the crucial stopover habitat and food to fuel the red knot's final leg to the Arctic. Year after year, the birds arrive here in May to feast on the eggs of horseshoe crabs.
"The conservation community has dedicated efforts to educate local communities about the importance of the Delaware Bay to migratory birds like the red knot," says Caleb Spiegel, a U.S. Fish and Wildlife Service shorebird biologist. "Despite the recent stability of the red knot population, it remains low and vulnerable to climate change."
Faced with a population crisis for red knots and other shorebirds that visit the Delaware Bay, these organizations are using an innovative approach to help protect this iconic bird.
"We've worked with our local partners on three campaigns in Patagonia, Argentina, for red knots," says Charles Duncan, director of Manomet's Shorebird Recovery Project. "The conservation outcomes are more than impressive. Now we want to replicate those successes at Delaware Bay."
The campaign includes four distinct tactics, all designed to engage and empower the local community to act on behalf of the red knot and their own interests.
Photo Credit: Just flip 'em!®, www.horseshoecrab.org
Re-turn the Favor: Members of the community are encouraged to help reduce horseshoe crab mortality by rescuing crabs that have been turned over by waves or have become trapped behind bulkheads or other human-built structures. The name "Re-turn the Favor" reflects the key role that horseshoe crabs play in protecting human health, as well as their irreplaceable role in the Delaware Bay ecosystem.
Delaware Bay Conservation Leaders Program: This program invites community leaders from many sectors – small-business owners, town and state officials, faith-based groups, sportsmen's associations – to join the international shorebird research team for a day. With guidance from the researchers, participants capture and band shorebirds alongside some of the world's best-known shorebird scientists. The opportunity to hold a migratory bird in one's hands can be transformative.
Association of NJ Bayshore Communities: This program seeks to replicate the success of Delaware's Alliance of Bay Communities as a way to empower local communities to be heard and included in political dialogue concerning the protection of their natural resources.
Delaware Bay Digital Connection: The goal of this program is to use traditional news media as well as digital networking tools to help unite and mobilize community members who are concerned about red knot conservation. These platforms communicate advances, challenges, and opportunities for individual action to create an informed and engaged community.
Together, these strategies are enhancing the work of existing conservation groups and agencies around a positive common-ground message through collaboration rather than competition. It is ultimately through the actions of individuals, that a species can recover. The strategies developed by the partnership offer engagement, learning, and most of all hope for the red knot's persistence.
Deb Reynolds, an outreach coordinator for the Service's Northeast Region's Migratory Bird Program and the Atlantic Coast Joint Venture, can be reached at firstname.lastname@example.com.
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Nagin: New Orleans No Longer Barring Residents
New Orleans-area residents early Wednesday are being allowed to return to their homes, a day earlier than scheduled, the city's Mayor C. Ray Nagin said — though the mayor said he did not consider it wise to come to the city just yet. All checkpoints leading to the city were lifted as of 9 a.m. local time for residents, according to comments the mayor made on WWL-TV. "If you have an out of town ID, you will be turned around," the mayor said.


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Heidi Klum & Her Victoria Secret Model Pals Take Over Times Square (PHOTOS)Sunny Chanel
Heidi Klum and her fellow supermodels took over Times Square. Yes, they are a powerful and pretty pretty bunch.
The mom of four —who just had her newest baby Lou six weeks ago won't be strutting her stuff but will be hosting the annual Victoria Secrets lingerie/fashion show on November 19th.
An exec from the brand told People, "Heidi is superwoman. She had a baby a few weeks ago and she is hosting the most high profile fashion show in the world. Victoria's Secret is thrilled to have her back. There is no one like her."
Check out more pics of Heidi and her angels here.
Photos: Splash News
Article Posted 6 years Ago


text: Connaught is quite wide but this is good for me since i have a high insteap, fit very good. I agree that TG73 isn´t a classic last but i like Gable on that last, the toe cap gives it a good balance imo. I don´t think i would like a plain wholecut in that last. I like Audley too but haven´t tried that last, the only Handgrade shoe i have is Clifford.