text:
Barack Obama
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"Nothing's gonna change. Let's just do our stuff."
- ~ Polish ex-president and Nobel Peace Prize winner Lech Wałęsa on Obama's election victory
|Barack Obama
|Political career
|44th President
|Vice President
|Joe Biden
|Term of office
|Preceded by
|George W. Bush
|Succeeded by
|Political party
|Democratic Party
|Personal details
|Date of birth
|August 4, 1961
|Place of birth
|Honolulu, Hawaii
|Date of death
|Place of death
|First Lady
|Michelle Obama
Barack Hussein
Osama Obama II[1] (born August 4, 1961) is the 44th and current President of the United States, and the first and only to hold office without the benefit of white skin.[2] Allegedly born in Honolulu, Hawaii, Obama is a graduate of the prestigious Columbia University, and worked as a community organizer, crime-fighter, and civil rights lawyer in Chicago before earning his law degree. He served as a young, shiningly optimistic upstart Illinois State from 1997 to 2004, and made the jump to U.S. Senator from Illinois[3] in 2005, serving as such until 2008.
Obama first started running for president in 2007, after having a cup of coffee in the Senate. Black coffee. In a white cup. In 2008, after raking Hillary Clinton across the coals, he won sufficient delegates in the Democratic Party primaries to receive the presidential nomination. He then defeated Republican nominee and cranky old man John McCain in the general election, and was inaugurated as president on January 20, 2009. Nine months after his election, Obama was named the 2009 Nobel Peace Prize laureate for his numerous accomplishments.
During his first term in office, Obama's chief accomplishments were subtle, sweeping changes in policy and government[4] that stabilized the weak economy and shook up Washington, changing the system and world for a brighter and better tomorrow. Some of these policies gave the government an alarmingly larger role in the everyday life of citizens, and in turn, a larger number of alarmed citizens. Obama was re-elected president in November 2012, defeating Republican nominee Willard Mittens Romney, and was sworn in for a second term on January 20, 2013.
Obama's supporters have claimed that he has quickly improved the United States government and the country in general. Detractors, on the other hand, claim that he is a foreign-born terrorist and dictator who has never accomplished anything and is trying to establish an imminent totalitarian state. As of his second term, Obama has gotten caught up in a number of scandals, which have given his detractors more fuel to the fire. These include NSA spying, lying about Benghazi, drone striking children in Yemen, and "trying to take away [their] guns."
Early life and career
Obama was allegedly[5] born on August 4, 1961 in Honolulu, Hawaii. His mother, Stanley Ann Dunham, was a white Kansan atheist, while his father, Kanye West, was a black Kenyan Muslim. Early on in his life, Obama spent much of his time whining about his lack of a solid cultural identity, interspersed in his later years with bouts of drug and alcohol abuse. West, hearing of his son's distress, decided to take him to a place where a half-white half-black child would be accepted by all: Indonesia. Here, Obama was confronted with a variety of religious, philosophical, and political views. He rapidly became familiar with the native traditions of malnourishment and Islam, two pillars of his current character, and became generally accustomed to Indonesian culture.
For the remainder his childhood, Obama was schooled in an Islamic madrasa on the need to behead infidels like you, and also studied in Hawaiian terrorist camps, while engaged in a correspondence course with the Soviet embassy. His exposure to many different political systems is probably what influenced his socialist and elitist tendencies later in life. Obama's spare time was spent under his bedcovers reading prosecutorial transcripts, jurist spec. sheets, and Uncle Tom's Cabin with a boy scout flashlight. His later years were spent, doing...uh, pretty much the same thing, except on a surfboard, until he left home and donated his flashlight to the Salvation Army.
After four years of living in a foreign country, and having acclimated himself to[6] its customs, Obama felt that he was truly ready to make a fresh start in Hawaii, and so, in 1971, he set off to return to his native land. It was at this time that Obama began to experiment with behavior-altering substances.[7] His experience in Hawaii prior to statehood in 1979 proved to be an informative experience. In the 1960s and 1970s, during his formative years, Hawaii was governed by tribal leaders who regulated nearly every aspect of island life. As a result, major industries such as pineapple harvesting and canoe-building were fiercely efficient, and Hawaii prospered. These tribal leaders earned Obama's respect and adoration, and he aspired to become one of them when he grew up. Their policies of wire-tapping[8] and otherwise keeping tabs on Hawaiians did not bother Obama, as he "felt safe and secure, and always had plenty of pineapple to eat."
In his late teens, Obama gave up his Muslim heritage and converted to Christianity.[9] Obama emphatically affirms his Christianity (especially after one of those occasional slips of the tongue) As an adult, he adopted as a preacher and spiritual mentor the charismatic Rev. Jeremiah Wright, notorious for colorful turns of phrases, such as, "God damn America...U.S. of KKK-A." But Obama wasn't listening when Wright said any of those things for twenty years. Honestly, a lot of Christians doze off in church. In 2008, Obama distanced himself from this heritage too.
After attending high school in Hawaii,[10] Obama, armed with a new confidence in his identity, set out to attend the prestigious Columbia University. He was quickly disillusioned by the vastness and inefficiency of the continental United States compared to the state-regulated, strictly controlled life he lived in Hawaii, and got less-than-average grades. Despite these struggles, Obama graduated from Columbia in 1983 with a major in political science and two minors, both in redundancy. His passionate idealism, long dormant, drips from every letter in his account of his college days.
Obama moved back to Chicago,[11] a city called the home of "machine politics" for the machine-like efficiency with which it delivers benefits to residents. There he went to work as a community organizer, crime-fighter, and civil rights lawyer. He is still fondly remembered for his work in organizing rigidly controlled community activities such as Little League games. His other work included menial canvassing of the type every Mormon is familiar with. During this time, Obama discovered what would become the key to his political success. He then ran for public office, perhaps to put his skill orchestrating these strictly regulated events to work on the entire state of Illinois.[12]
Senate career
Obama was elected to the Illinois Senate in 1996 as the representative from the 13th district, which included Chicago's South Side. As such, his first task was to bring peace between warring factions within the city.[13] He then went on to gain support for his ethics and health care legislation, indicative of his will to control every aspect of his constituents' lives. During this time his Junior Undersecretary, Bill Ayers, also gained the support and admiration of Chicagoicans, particularly for his Weather Underground movement which helped relay rain forecasts to more people than ever before.
Obama's time in the Illinois Senate will perhaps be remembered most for its impact on the daily lives of Chicagoites. During this time, Obama spread the wealth around his district, and also implemented his new anti-privacy methods, leading communities and churches to lasting prosperity under the watchful eye of the patented Obama Cams®. His welfare reform program was a great success, and would foreshadow his tendencies as President towards regulating the lives of every class of citizen. One of his lesser-known successes was his mandate that all homicide interrogations be videotaped, which was the first in a long string of surveillance-related laws aimed at "increasing public safety" and other such nonsense. At first the methods allowed by these laws were unsuccessful, as Obama copied the methods of his native Hawaii, and very few Chicagoists were fooled by medium-sized cameras concealed within pineapples. However, very soon his policies denouncing privacy in favor of total government control swept the state. He also voted against stricter laws concerning gangs, since the strict rules of gang life strongly reminded of his time in the state-controlled utopia of Hawaii.
Having implemented his new methods in the state of Illinois,[14] Obama won Illinois' open seat in the U.S. Senate in 2004 after his anti-privacy legislation let his campaign obtain embarrassing photographs of his overweight opponent at the beach. These photographs were maliciously distributed by the liberal media.[15] Upon reaching Washington, Obama quickly became known as one of the 100 most liberal Senators. Much like all liberal Senators from this period, his main focus was criticisms of President Bush. Obama was particularly alarmed at Bush's[16] tendency to let Americans run their own lives.
Despite a radical voting record during his tenure in the Senate, Obama gained a centrist reputation by behaving identically to most other senators: promptly using his post as a stepping-stone to higher office (of which there is exactly one) despite having told Illinois voters he would complete his term. This gambit let Obama show his virtuosity at deflecting accusations, most often with the claim that his promises are "old news" and his accusers are old-fashioned, are bought off by industry, and cling to guns. If you had to do it that often, you'd get good at it too. But Obama never approached the masterful response of his party's last President: "Well, I meant it when I said it."
Presidential campaigns
2008 presidential campaign
- "Dear Diary, I have it! Today, as I sat down to lunch at Burger King, I watched an altercation between a customer whom the cashier had forgotten to give his change. It was then I realized what the American people truly want. How foolish I was to heed the advice of those who have made it into office! They've become so disconnected that they waste all of their time governing, instead of listening, to the people. But I, eating with the common man in that regal resteraunt, see those false kings for what they really are. And I will be their usurper."
- ~ Obama on change
Obama, who couldn't take the government's inaction any longer, announced his candidacy for President of the United States on February 10, 2007. The announcement took place in front of the Old State Capitol building in Springfield, Illinois while surrounded by groupies. His choice of the announcement site was a symbolic one since it was also where Abraham Lincoln delivered his historic "House Divided" speech in 1858.[17] When Obama first ran for president, there were six other candidates running for the Democratic nomination; they consisted of Joe Biden, John Edwards, and three other old white guys nobody knew nor cared about.[18]
Under the guidance of King Blagojevich III, Obama trained to become the president. After months of squabbling on stages across the country, the race came down to a young black man and an old white
man woman. During this time, Obama promoted a message of "hope and change" which mesmerized American voters due to the sweet, melodic tones of his voice and the attraction of the everyman to his message. He famously promised Joe the Plumber that he intended to "share the wealth" and return it "to its rightful owners," usually meaning the audience for that day's speech. Even Joe was convinced that his earnings could be better spent helping "the guy on his way up after you," and he became Obama's Ohio campaign manager.
Ultimately, "hope and change," apart from the obvious fact that Obama was not Bush, became hard to flesh out. But ridicule worked as perfectly as ever, and Obama managed to rake primary rival Hillary Clinton across the coals.[19] In June 2008, after defeating Hillary Clinton, Obama started to raise funds for his campaigns and attack the Republican nominee, John McCain, who was considered by Obama to be nothing if not ridiculous. In retaliation, McCain would take off the kid gloves he wore during the Republican primaries and angrily challenged Obama to a friendly non-threatening series of polite town hall meetings across the country where they could hug, sit and talk about the world today with the American populace over a nice warm cup of coffee.
During this time, Obama wanted assurance that his coffee wouldn't be so hot that it would burn his tongue; McCain agreed, provided that he have Jell-O after every meal and two tablespoons of Dulcolax stool softener. Obama ended up rejecting the deal; enraged, McCain vowed to release cold-blooded attack ads and insensitive talking points against his opponent. Later on, he sealed his revenge by driving the Straight-Talk Express in front of Obama's campaign bus at an old man's pace, complete with delayed reactions to oncoming traffic.
In August, Obama announced Joe Biden as his running mate; bitter Hillary Clinton voters understandably lost their shit. In response to this, John McCain announced Sarah Palin as his
running mate bitch on the side, sensing an opportunity to profit from the nation-wide PMS protest. However, despite McCain's efforts, Obama defeated the cranky old guy with 53% of the vote, something oddly referred to as a landslide and a mandate to correct America's perennial defect of not having enough bureaucracy.
After his inauguration, Obama firmly spread the word of hope and change to all walks of life, and to all peoples in all nations, so that we may prosper under his warming, glowing, warm glow. Many Republican opponents suspect Obama's victory is to blame on the use of brainwashing machines. Liberal scientists explain these strange phenomena in the sky as being weather balloons. The general public wonders why weather balloons look so freakin' weird these days.
- "It's not all about me!"
- ~ Barack Obama on Barack Obama
Obama's 2009 inauguration was one of the most expensive, adjusted for inflation, of any leader in history. It outstripped the coronations of Augustus Caesar, King Cyrus the Great of Persia, and the ancient Egyptian pharaohs in lavishness. This statistic has already been noted by the Guinness Book of World Records, a fact of which Obama is immensely proud. The Senator who succeeded Obama in the Illinois senate seat, Roland Burris, is even more proud and has already written this fact on his mausoleum.
As if the Styrofoam columns that decorated the Democratic National Convention stage weren't enough, Obama ordered Styrofoam columns to be placed on every single street corner in Washington D.C. In addition, he commissioned a full-size replica of the Roman Colosseum, plated in gold, to be built on the Capitol Mall in front of the Washington Monument. Statues of Obama's trim figure, clad in a toga, adorned this opulent structure in lieu of the Roman gods. Unfortunately, the 5 million people in attendance at the event trampled the whole thing then tried to climb on top of it to try to see the historic event.
Secret underground Inaugural festivities included gladiator fights, staged by the Brutus Gladiatorial Agency.[20] Obama has already issued pre-emptive Presidential pardons to the winners of the fights. Nearly 1,000 man-to-man battles will take place, and viewers of the Inauguration will be treated to a bloody spectacle the likes of which the world has not seen for nearly 2,000 years.
Reminding the American people of their economic hardships, Obama has urged ordinary citizens to make sacrifices and to prepare for the trillion-dollar deficits ahead. Ordinary citizens responded to the speech by picking up litter left over in the aftermath of the inaugural parade.
Domestic policy
Economic takeovers
- "Our economic fortunes are changing! We must remain optimistic, however, and not let ourselves be discouraged from buying shiny things. My opponents want to not change the economy and keep it the same, but you can put lipstick on a pig, and it is still a pig, it is just a different name for the same thing. Now some liberals say I can heal lepers and raise the dead, so you know I can make an economic policy that does not make sense work by using change and hope, and hope for change, so that it does make sense. By increasing taxes while giving 95% of people tax cuts will solve all problems and definitely bring about change."
- ~ Obama on the economy
As President, Obama achieved quick passage of a stimulus package to address the nation's economic doldrums. It borrowed money to invest in America's rising industries: union halls, intimidators at polls, and abortion mills. Obama confidently stated that the money would be re-spent, sloshing around as though the nation were prosperous and confident; or if it didn't, it would be the fault of the mess he inherited. Oddly, much of the emergency spending was deferred to occur during the 2010 campaigns.
Obama purchased failing corporations and banks. Officials worried that a result of massive bankruptcies would be the creation of large vacuums as people, buildings, and factories disappeared, with other Americans sucked into the maw until nothing was left. The move gave the federal government near-total control over an increasing number of formerly private institutions. The policy made most Americans feel so secure about "change" that they didn't bat an eye when Obama proposed exercising comparable control over companies he had not purchased. Perhaps a nation newly-distracted by dope and promiscuous sex would ignore the ominous changes that were occurring.
- "We are all hoping for change on this issue. I hope that the solution is to give the homeless change. I will give them a good mortgage at 2.25% from Fannie Mae."
- ~ Obama on homeless people
Obama and his various "czars" managed them as the free-enterprise system was never able to do. General Motors was directed to sell half its brands to automobile companies in the Third World and close domestic dealerships, especially those that had contributed to John McCain. On the government-owned banks, the Administration argued that companies owned by the people could no longer pay "excessive" executive salaries. A "salary czar" reduced some salaries by 90%. But the affected executives readily acknowledged that they should work for peanuts. Said one, "Hell, I'm not doing anything the average illegal wouldn't do for minimum wage." A few agreed to work for free during the national economic emergency.
Health care reform
"Change it, or hope for Canada to annex the US. If that doesn't work I hope I can change health care via my progressive social programs that hope to change health care and bring hope for change to the sick and disabled."
- ~ Obama on health care
Having transformed American industry along the successful Soviet model, Obama turned to the signature issue of health care, to replace unimportant treatment with a system of universal coverage. In one version of the reform bill (S.666):
- Page 105 reduces health-care costs by requiring the states of Louisiana, Alabama, Mississippi, and South Carolina, and the City of Detroit, to secede from the union immediately
- Page 2356 further reduces health-care costs by ensuring that every American gets an annual rectal exam, administered by a compassionate and gentle IRS employee.
- Page 3999 ensures that communicable diseases are not spread aboard airliners by giving the TSA powers to administer a complete physical, including mammography, pap smear and/or prostate exam before boarding is permitted.
The decimated opposition was left to carping that the U.S. Government might not be able to manage everyone's medical treatment, given that it had already failed to:
- Operate a web site to reimburse citizens who had junked their high-pollution cars,
- Keep reality-TV gadflies from crashing state dinners, and
- Watch obvious hijackers who are on the Watch List.
Obama promised that Americans could keep their favorite doctors, in the same way that they already choose their letter-carriers.
Energy policy and gathering darkness
Obama's administration continued to resolve the age-old controversy between black and white. The Attorney General was newly black, and Americans had to open the door to scruffy black visitors, as they might not be Muslim evangelists but census takers.
However, in 2010, the nation was shocked to see the very surface of the Gulf of Mexico get blacker and blacker, as an oil well a mile down ruptured. Obama took quick action:
- Verifying that the Jones Act was intact and would protect Americans from the scourge of foreign oil skimmers and their non-union crews.
- Denying permits for dredging and for use of dispersants, which could be bad for the environment. This kept the oil spill one of the cleanest in history.
- Shutting down other deep-water wells for six months, just to be safe.
- Explaining how environmental permitting and litigation showed his continuing commitment to job creation.
- Lecturing Americans that the spill was their fault, as the average American stubbornly uses more gasoline than, say, the average Kenyan.
Ray Nagin, the mayor who had chafed at Bush's slow federal response to Hurricane Katrina, was pleased during the Obama years that New Orleans was restored as America's "chocolate city." He expressed pleasure when a new hurricane season threatened to turn the black slick into an emulsion, declaring, "It will be like a giant, chocolate Smoothie!"
Gun control
- "The rednecks believe I want them off the streets, spat on, and burned in he- (looks around to see that his audience are pro-gun people) because a redneck with a gun is a CDV situation waiting to happen. But I support guns in the hands of people who want to protect themselves from violent spouses and evil deers. I mean, uh, I support the removal of guns from criminals, drunken abusive people, and political assassins. I also believe that butcher knives and rat poison should be inaccessable to rural housewives. If we remove weapons from the people most likely to wield them, then there will be no more murders."
- ~ Obama on gun control
Drug usage
Obama called off federal prosecution of citizens of states with medical-marijuana laws.
No Child Left Behind
"Like a baby that has soiled himself, it must be changed."
- ~ Obama on No Child Left Behind
Foreign policy
"Kenya is high on my list of important countries to visit. I will also visit some white countries as well. I will also visit Canada but only when the seasons change to summer. I would visit Mexico except they all moved here. I will recognize Alaska and open an embassy there, even though they didn't vote for me. I will never recognize Israel or New York City."
- ~ Obama on foreign policy
Iraq War
"American policy in Iraq needs to be changed. There is little optimism concerning our future in Iraq. To remedy this, all American forces will be redeployed to the Cape of Good Hope."
- ~ Obama on Iraq
"Illegal immigrants are full of hope that they might one day become citizens. We must either change our attitudes and accept this, or hope for them to go away. If they don't go away perhaps we should go away."
- ~ Obama on illegal immigrants
A change for the better, right? Oh. I see. That kind of change. Like changing the worth of a dollar into a penny or turning the United States into a third world country within the first three months of office. Why don't Americans ever read the fine print! Fuck! But you have to admit. It's brilliant, he promised change and that's what happened. Oh well, if that's what he's comfortable with then that's that. But for future reference, be careful what they promise, you just might get it!
I could try to elucidate Mr. Obama's position on change, but wouldn't it be so much better to hear it in his own words?
- "Experience? That word leaves a bad taste in my mouth. Our whole problem is that right now people are too experienced: too experienced at wheedling, too experienced at cutting deals, and too experienced at serving special interests! This is the time for new leadership! The time for hope! The time for change! The time for optimism! After that, perhaps more hope! Then hope again, change for a little while, then a mixture of optimism and change! After that we break for lunch and a toot of blow. Then it's right back at things with some light change..."
- ~ Obama on change
It also helps to put it in the words of Joe the Plummer:
- "The only change we seen, is in skin tone and the number'a peoples out of work. Fuck man, if I wanted that kind of change I would have voted for the CEO of GM. I thoughts we was gonna see a change for da betta but it don't like it's gonna happen in my lifetime. I'm lucky cause peoples always gotta take a dump and brush their teeth usin' the plumbin' and all, but other peoples ain't gonna be so lucky. Theys gonna have to spend more dough on education with dollars more useless than pennies. I thank da lord ever day that I's got some learnin' under my belt, but others? They won't be gettin' diddly squat wit dis here presdent and all his so-called change. I call it fuckin' bullshit cause that's what it really is. Bull Shit."
- ~ Joe the Plummer on change
Obama has restored abortion funding that his predecessor had fought.
Washington Lobbyists
- "Kill them. Every one. After we receive their bribes."
- ~ Obama on Washington Lobbyists
Cementing of power
With the American people lulled into a sense of security, Obama passed the Enabling Act of 2010 through Congress. Although this bill severely limits the authority of Congress, Obama forced its passage through the use of waterboarding. After the drowning death of Mike Huckabee, the remaining holdouts fell in line quickly. With the interfering voices of the American people out of the way, Obama was able to concentrate on consolidating his power which was really Obama's biggest priority, he could move on to our next biggest threat aka Joe Biden, in the most amusing way possible (he experimented with dummies for a while about this, and he eventually decided on stuffing him with fruit like a chicken until he burst). He concealed Biden's disappearance with elaborate cover stories claiming Biden was unavailable for public appearances because he was too busy overseeing wasteful government programs. President Obama instated Barack's Directorate of Social Monitoring (BDSM for short), the public face of which was spiffy little pictures of the man himself hanging on walls in public places with eyes that follow you around as you pass by. As an added bonus and source of revenue he began to sell "mini-Baracks", desk-top bobble-heads of the President equipped with miniature digital cameras concealed in the head, that you can put anywhere: the dinner table, your desk at work, your car, your bathroom, your bedroom, anywhere, so he can watch you while you eat/work/drive/crap/masturbate/plot against him. President Obama then turned his attention to national security, passing the Invasion of Privacy Act. Any persons caught speaking ill of the President and therefore determined to be threats to society are rounded up and placed in detention centers. Free thinkers and dissenters are not tolerated under the new regime of Barack Obama's watchful gaze.[21]
President of the World
President Obama's charisma has led equally charismatic Libyan strongman Moammar Qaddafi to call for Obama to retain his office permanently. Nations of the U.N. have taken up these calls for the installation of Obama as the leader-for-life of the free world, as well as all other ones. They admire his determination to bring America to the table of world nations (or to the dog bowl underneath said table). The government of China has volunteered to conduct the elections for this important post.
Cultural and political image
- "All hail the Glorious Leader! Before Obama rose to power, we were a troubled people. Different countries fighting, corrupt and unattractive politicians cheating the people of our great global state, people in poverty stricken areas like Africa scarcely had enough to eat or drink as disease ravaged the land. Indeed, even the Jonas Brothers were still popular in those dark and desperate times. Now thanks to Obama, every family on Earth has food to eat, water to drink, and plenty of Barack O'Bills in their wallets as we stand in unity under our fair and kind leader's banner."
- ~ Average Joe on Obama
In the media, Obama is often portrayed as the perfect choice for a nation that, for two decades, had dealt with global adversaries and foreign invaders mostly by singing "Kum-Ba-Yah." He is also considered to be the first president of the NRA not to be lynched by an angry mob in white robes holding torches, so you know he's one of the good ones. He brings hope and change and you know we can do it. By taking down the man, Obama will set the lower class working people free from economic oppression. Don't believe me? Well, don't take my word for it (jerk).
Supporters of Obama think of him as the near-equivalent to a Messiah or superhero. They have praised him for his numerous accomplishments (see below) and charisma; their praises also stem from him providing them with free "Obama phones." Detractors, on the other hand, consider Obama to be the exact opposite of a Messiah; rather, they find him to be a well-known terrorist who claims his god "Oprah" is commanding him to destroy America. They have frequently labeled him as a liar, war criminal, Zionist NWO/Illuminati shill, dictator, and "long-legged mack daddy." They have compared him to Hitler or Satan on multiple occasions, and claim that his authoritarian tendencies resemble the dystopia portrayed in the book 1984 by George Orwell. Obama responded with a curt "That's double-plus-ungood" and subsequently banned Fox News from the Press Pool.
International recognition for numerous accomplishments
In 2009, President Obama was awarded the Nobel Peace prize for numerous accomplishments, which may have included:
- A fifth-place award in the 7th-grade spelling bee
- No tardies during the school year of 1970, and
- Winning the Boy Scout Pine-Car Derby 3 years straight.
Obama also received a red poppy pin for contributing to the war in Afghanistan and a giant stuffed Tasmanian Devil for sinking 3 baskets at the Maryland state fair. There's no stopping this man.
The results pile up
Obama's opponents pooh-poohed his determination to project a gentler international presence—for example, to negotiate with tin-god dictators "without preconditions." But they could not forever deny the results of replacing cowboy theatrics with a new era of charismatic personal intervention:
- Obama's jet-set arrival into Copenhagen clinched the decision to hold the Olympics in his home city of Chicago. On a separate trip to the city, his last-minute nagging of diplomats clinched agreement on a new global warming treaty.
- Meeting with Hugo Chávez and accepting a book on American imperialism transformed the Venezuelan dictator, who no longer claimed U.S. Presidents smelled like sulfur.
- His habit of bowing to Saudi Arabian emirs, and to the Japanese (who know something about bowing) commanded immediate respect and concession to U.S. foreign policy. He applied the same utter niceness to the Koreas, which secured a new trade deal with South Korea and an end to the belligerence of North Korea.
- Enhanced attention to Iran got it to abandon its nuclear ambitions. A President with an Arabic middle name and ambiguous parentage achieved an end to terrorist attempts on the U.S.
- Personal appearances in New Jersey and Virginia kept the governorships in the hands of the Democratic Party, and a last-minute visit to Massachusetts to stress the importance to Obama's health-care mandate helped retain the seat of the late Ted Kennedy in the most Democratic state in the Union.
- Vigorous campaigning limited the losses in the 2010 mid-term elections—which were inevitable, and of course also Bush's fault—and ensured that the Democrats would not lose the House of Reprehensibles.
Family and personal life
Obama's personal life is a complete mystery. The staff of the White House Media Liaison has post-edited any information it deems "a threat to the President's personal safety." Consequently, it is impossible to find mention in newspapers or broadcast media of many public events, such as the time he slapped Queen Elizabeth on the back and gave her a gift of twenty five DVDs set to only play in America.
Bills in Congress relieve other threats to the President by requiring broadcasters to balance popular shows with shows no one listens to (the "Fairness Doctrine"), or limiting the number of franchises that can carry Limbaugh and Hannity so most Americans will have to listen to that local guy with the cleft palate. The threat posed by Sarah Palin is being handled privately, as the dozen Associated Press "fact-checkers" that tailed her during the campaign are still on the investigation.
A nagging problem with the President's security is that Google Maps still shows Obama's whereabouts if you type "Obama" into the search bar. The White House corps is trying to resolve this problem. In the mean time, an Executive Order bars any use of Google inside the U.S., other than Image Search.
- ↑ Also known as Barry Soetoro, from his Indonesian passport.
- ↑ Although Obama is only half black, and was raised entirely by white Hawaiian grandparents, he is still referred to as the "first black president" by cultural standards. This can be proven true by the following scenario: there are six fruits in a basket. Three are oranges, three are apples. The basket is hanging from an apple tree, in an apple orchard. But it's still going to be the first basket of oranges in the White House!
- ↑ A huge difference.
- ↑ Oxymorons be damned.
- ↑ Many dispute this claim, since Hawaiians have notoriously poor record-keeping skills, as can be demonstrated by their lack of statehood records prior to the 1950s.
- ↑ And gotten bored with.
- ↑ These substances included genuine Hawaiian lava and poi.
- ↑ Using the Coconut phone and coconut radio, the latest in island technology.
- ↑ Reliable sources point out that only 1% of Muslims convert to Christianity, rendering this statistically impossible.
- ↑ Known in Hawaii as "Volcano Worship Preparation School".
- ↑ Reason: "It's not Indonesia and it's not Hawaii."
- ↑ Plus, being a politician is the only kind of career where dorks can succeed.
- ↑ His most famous victory of this kind was the reconciling of Cubs fans and White Sox fans.
- ↑ The self-proclaimed most important state in the nation.
- ↑ All media is liberal media.
- ↑ And every other President in history
- ↑ It is speculated by historians that had Lincoln not dilivered this speech, the south would have won the civil war and Barack Obama's father would have been made into a slave upon his arrival to American, thus making Obama 100% white as oppose to 50%. It is also speculated that Obama's name would have been Barry O'Brien.
- ↑ One of them might have been Mexican, but don't quote me!
- ↑ Clinton is said to still be smoldering over her defeat in a campaign bus last spotted in the parking lot of a Piggly Wiggly in south Arkansas.
- ↑ The Brutus Agency is owned by the same company that publishes Obama's books.
- ↑ Trust me, it's very watchful. He's watching me right now...
See also
- Barack Obama's birth
- Barack Obama's Teleprompter
- Baraq Hussein Osama
- Obama and card stacking
- Blacks
- Change
- Hawaiians
- Pre-Presidential Accomplishments of Barack Obama
- Yes, we can!
- Barack Obama (rapper)
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text:
[♪upbeat electronic music♪] ADOBE TV Presents... Paul Trani in... Adobe Flash Professional CSS - Training with Trani The Deco Tool was introduced in Flash CS4. It's pretty powerful, but it's gotten even more robust since CS4. In CS5, it's definitely really powerful and really helpful. I'm going to go ahead and show you all of it and everything it can do. Again, halfway down, I'm going to select the Deco Tool, and what it is, is it's like a procedural drawing tool. In general, I'm going to go ahead and select the tool, and then define its properties in the properties panel. So, right over here on the side, notice how I can select any one of these items--these top three. Again, I'm in Flash CS4 but I'm going to go beyond that. In fact, I'm going to jump down here to the Building Brush. I'm going to select the Building Brush, and notice that the options say that it's going to give me a Random building. All I'm going to do is I'm just going to click and drag. I'm going to start drawing these buildings, and as you can see, it gives me these random buildings. It really allows me to create this sort of cityscape pretty quickly. Again, this is actually just a js file, and if you were so inclined, you could actually write your own Deco Brushes. So again, just some quick buildings, kind of, in here-- that looks pretty good, why not? Great--it works out really well. Again, I'm going to use the Deco Brush, the Deco Tool and I'm going to select a different brush. In this case, I'm going to go beyond that Building brush. Let's go down to the Tree brush, because, again, I'm making this scene. I'm going to select this next layer above it, and now I can go ahead and draw. Notice, I have Aspen Tree selected. With that tree selected, I can just go ahead and click and drag. Look at how it builds that tree--pretty darn awesome, if you ask me. Again, I'm just clicking and dragging. It creates that tree. If I was to create this on my own, this would just take hours, but in Flash, obviously, you can see that it does it pretty quickly. Let me jump down to a Winter Evergreen. I'm going to draw this out and see what this looks like. I can sort of reposition these all I want, whatever the case may be--but you can see that I can draw trees. Let's go ahead and switch this one more time. I'm going to jump over to the Flower Brush and from there, I'm going to make sure Garden Flower is selected. I can even adjust the size down to say, 50 percent, if I want to, on both the flower and the leaf. Let's just position this, and I can start to draw this little trail of flowers. Obviously, you can see what it does. It really allows me to create this scene quickly. So there we are so far--just a quick scene. I'm going to go ahead and show you some other tools that I can use. I'm going to go ahead and turn on this layer, because this is all about the internal organs and processes for the human body. What I'm going to do is I'm going to go ahead and select the Deco Brush, and I'm going to select the Deocrated Brush. So this is another brush that really has a lot of options in here. Again, I encourage you to peruse these at your convenience. I'm going to select Thick Arrows for my project. Pattern color is going to be black, and now I can go ahead and click and drag. So again, I'm just kind of drawing the circulation of air within the lungs, but you can see how quickly I can do this. I don't have to position all of these arrows one at a time manually. Ah, but you're still not impressed? Let's go beyond that. I'm going to select the Deco Tool and the last brush I'm going to use is going to be this Fire Animation. That's right--you can have a brush that has animation in it. So Fire Animation is selected. We're going to go ahead and give this guy heartburn--how about it? I'll just click right in there, and it generates this fire. If you notice in my timeline, you can see it starts to generate that animation. It's just a sort of frame by frame animation, but obviously, it's doing all this work that I don't have to do, and that's really why I love it. So let's just give it a second to finish out. If my timeline wasn't already extended, it would extend out my timeline for that particular layer. There we are, again--my animation. If I just go to the beginning and hit return, I can see that sure enough, the character--this guy--does have heartburn. Again, those were just some real quick examples of using the Deco Tool, defining the different Brushes, customizing them-- There's a lot you can do, so I just really encourage you to go out there and explore it. Thank you so much for joining me today. [♪upbeat electronic music♪] ADOBE TV Productions tvadobe.com
Deco Tool for Complex Drawing
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About This Episode
The Deco tool was introduced in Flash CS4 but has just come into its own with over two dozen new possibilities. Paul will show you how to use and customize these new brushes.
Runtime : 00:05:22 Added : 07/23/2010
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Flash Training with Paul Trani
Time to get trained! In this show, trainer and evangelist Paul Trani will show you how to move your content from print to web to mobile, all while showing off the new features in Flash Professional.
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subset: commoncrawl


text:
Optimist baseball rosters heavy in Roseville flavor
Eight players and five coaches from Roseville high schools help comprise the North large- and small-schools rosters for the annual Optimist All-Star Baseball Games on Saturday, June 11, at American River College.
The small-schools game is scheduled for 4 p.m. with the large-schools game scheduled to begin 30 minutes after the conclusion of the opener.
Nick Blaser and Anthony Roberts, who helped lead Roseville to the Sac-Joaquin Section Division II championship, the school's first in baseball since 1984, were selected to the North large-schools team, as were Nate Esposito and Andrew Wilson of Granite Bay, Kyle Jones of Oakmont and Kramer Sutey of Woodcreek.
Blaser is wrapping up a stellar four-year varsity career in which his last hit, in Roseville's 4-2 victory over Rocklin in the section final, was his 100th in high school.
Roberts, Jones and Wilson all hit better than .400 and led their teams in hits.
Granite Bay's Pat Esposito is the North head coach and will be assisted by Kelly Mayo of Woodcreek and Joe Swope of Granite Bay.
Brad Gunter Jr., who coached Valley Christian Academy to the Division VII section title, will lead the North small-schools team and will be joined on the bench by Lions assistant Todd Conroy.
North player selections include Junior Casas and Micky DeFiebre of Valley Christian and Michael Gassaway and Cory Moore of Antelope.
Casas hit the go-ahead home run in the section championship game. He hit .507 with seven homers and 33 RBI for the Lions.
When: The small-schools game begins at 4 p.m. today with the large-schools game to follow.
Where: American River College
Tickets: $10 for adults, $5 for students, $3 for kids 5 and under
Bella Vista: Ben Brooks, Dustin Vaught. Casa Roble: Shane Rae. Del Campo: Mike Nantze. Del Oro: Jesse Lang. Granite Bay: Nate Esposito, Andrew Wilson. Jesuit: Brian Celsi, Matt Rogers. Nevada Union: Chris Porter. Oakmont: Kyle Jones. Rio Linda: Dustin Jenkins. Rocklin: Austin Diemer, Brian Hosang. Roseville: Nick Blaser, Anthony Roberts. Woodcreek: Kramer Sutey. Yuba City: Cody Kent, Tyler Olson. Coaches: Pat Esposito, Granite Bay; Kelly Mayo, Woodcreek; Joe Swope, Granite Bay.
Christian Brothers: Russell King. Cordova: Lucas David. Davis: Josh Cosio, Alec Miramontes. Elk Grove: J.D. Davis, Jorge Vina. Franklin: Jordan Johnson, Jon Zunich. Oak Ridge: Austin Ales, Cole Hansen, Chris Muse-Fisher. Pleasant Grove: Garrett Heisinger. Ponderosa: Jerrod Bravo, Tyler Evanoff, Hunter Gallant. Rosemont: Dylan Malone. Vacaville: Brenden Farney, C.J. Jacobe. Coaches: Jeff Carlson, Elk Grove; Justin Parnell, Elk Grove; George Mullins, Elk Grove; Dave Pickney, Elk Grove; Todd Melton, Oak Ridge.
Antelope: Michael Gassaway, Cory Moore. Auburn Christian: Luke Sween. Bear River: Coleman Huntley, Michael Lucas. Center: Zack Wade. Faith Christian: Chris Harmon. Inderkum: Nathan LaCasse. Lincoln: Sean Fox, Marcus Maldonado. Marysville: Derrick Brown. Mesa Verde: Tyler Long. Pioneer: Micheal Barron. San Juan: Logan Day. Trinity Prep: Brendan Quinn. Valley Christian: Junior Casas, Micky DeFiebre. Whitney: Trent Duncan. Coaches: Brad Gunter Jr., Valley Christian; Todd Conroy, Valley Christian; Dave Watson, San Juan; A.J. Roberts, San Juan; Paul Weaver, San Juan.
Bradshaw Christian: Brady Dragmire. Capital Christian: Brock Hansen. Dixon: Angel Lara. Florin: Danny Ruiz, Chris White. Grant: Robert Munoz. Hiram Johnson: Sal Barajas. West Campus: Brian Carey, Moises Saldana. Kennedy: Kameron Miura, Marcel Thuston. McClatchy: Max Cordy, Nick Mar. River City: Kasey Chapan. Sacramento: Lee Carter. Union Mine: Jon Wong. Vista del Lago: John McCants. Coaches: Randy Davis, Florin; Ken O'Flaherty, Florin; Alex Ruiz, Florin; Mike DeNecochea, McClatchy.


text: Lindi Ortega (born May 28) is a Canadian singer-songwriter and musician, known for her voice that has been described as a blend of Dolly Parton, Johnny Cash, and Emmylou Harris. She spent nearly a decade as an independent artist in the Toronto music scene, self-releasing two albums and an EP in that time. She has been described as "Toronto''s best kept secret" and has been affectionately called "Indie Lindi". In 2008 she was signed to Cherrytree Records / Interscope Records and released a second EP. Her latest album is Little Red Boots, released on Last Gang Records in June 2011. At the end of 2010 and beginning of 2011, Ortega toured extensively as a backup singer for Brandon Flowers, the lead singer of The Killers, in support of his solo album, Flamingo. This tour included dates in the United States, United Kingdom, Germany, France, Italy, Spain and Mexico, as well as televised live performances on The Tonight Show With Jay Leno, Jimmy Kimmel Live, Later... with Jools Holland and at Abbey Road Studios. There were also a number of festival dates in the United States and Europe, including Coachella, T in the Park and Oxegen.


text:
Contribution posted on behalf of Danilo Beloglavec
Dear John and Janos,
Thank you for the invitation for an online discussion. First I would like to congratulate for the good idea to bring forward the idea of rural cooperatives. I am sure that the consultants will analyze the answers of the questionnaires. I want to submit here only three points that are not new.
1) My personal view is that the most important factor that the coops can succeed and become sustainable is the human factor. If the personal interests of the administration, board members,staff and members are not compatible with their personal ambitions no rules, subsidies or training can substitute it. Unfortunately an efficient manager wants to be well rewarded. If not he has to mismanage (steal), find another job or create his enterprise that will very often compete with his previous coop.
2) The members have to have a real advantage from their coop. Only in that case they will not sell their best products to private enterprises and the second class to the coop. Naturally the coop has to pay in time and not 9 to 15 months late.
3) The management has to improve the productivity and quality of their members. In this since during my time with FAO wery little was done and many donor sponsored large scale projects were not sustainable without outside help and benefited the donor industry and larger scale farmers in developing countries.
I know that is nothing new, and is easier to write model coop rules, legislation an new workshop than to find products that are requested by the market at a standard quality and a competitive price.
Best regards
Danilo Beloglavec
Former FAO Senior Development Officer
En México, el cooperativismo ha pasado por diferentes etapas, dependiendo de la inclinación política de los gobernantes en turno. Así, han pasado de tener un gran apoyo gubernamental a ser éste prácticamente nulo en diferentes ocasiones. Sin embargo, ni el gran apoyo de un régimen ha significado el éxito de las cooperativas ni la falta de apoyo ha llevado realmente a su extinción.
Las principales medidas por parte del estado que han fomentado la creación de las cooperativas han sido el reservar durante más de 60 años la pesca de las principales especies marinas exclusivamente para las cooperativas y el exigir este tipo de asociación para poder tener acceso a una serie de programas de apoyo, incluyendo créditos o financiamiento a fondo perdido.
Hasta antes de la revolución mexicana de 1910, la pesca en México se llevaba a cabo por medio de "Concesiones masivas", por medio de las cuales se otorgaba la exclusividad de un área o de una especie a determinada compañía, las cuales en ese momento eran extranjeras por regla general. Al triunfo de la revolución, se cambio diametralmente el esquema, reservándose las especies de valor para el aprovechamiento exclusivo ahora de las cooperativas. Aunque en los 90s cambió este esquema, de cualquier manera fue determinante para que la mayoría de las cooperativas del sector primario estén dedicadas a la pesca.
En lo que concierne a la producción propiamente dicha, tanto agrícola como ganadera, es casi nula la existencia de cooperativas, pues aunque se fomentaron igualmente, la mayoría no logró sobrevivir. Sin embargo, actualmente han surgido como una buena opción para la transformación y la comercialización de productos agropecuarios, constituyéndose las cooperativas como uniones de productores, en donde cada quien maneja su propia unidad de producción pero se asocia para tener acceso a maquinaria, financiamiento o mercados que de otra forma no conseguiría. En el caso del frijol, maíz, sorgo, etc, esta figura se utiliza para el establecimiento de la empresa acopiadora y comercializadora, Para los pequeños productores de café, les ha dado oportunidad de participar en la comercialización más allá de la simple entrega, pues les permite contar con laboratorios y certificaciones que de manera individual, por su tamaño como productores, es imposible. En todos estos casos, es la exigencia por parte del estado de que se constituyan como sociedades cooperativas para tener acceso a los apoyos lo que ha impulsado la creación de estas sociedades.
En el caso de las cooperativas de ahorro y crédito en la agricultura, éstas han recibido un gran impulso en los últimos años, ya que el estado no trabaja directamente con los campesinos, sino que utiliza intermediarios a los que llama "Dispersores financieros", siendo ellos los encargados de dar la atención directa en crédito y asesoría a los pequeños productores. Ahora bien, estas "cooperativas de ahorro" en realidad son empresas que no cumplen con la esencia de la organización cooperativa, pues de ninguna manera se toman en ellas las decisiones de manera democrática, sino que son manejadas por individuos a manera de "dueños", trabajan con empleados que en los hechos solo reciben su sueldo y no actúan comprometidos con la comunidad, ya que encarecen en forma desmedida el crédito.
En el punto anterior considero que se encuentra el principal obstáculo para el establecimiento de cooperativas en México, pues el tomar las decisiones democráticamente entra en conflicto con el deseo de manejar e incluso de apropiarse de la organización por parte de uno o varios socios, lo cual ha dado lugar a una gran cantidad de fraudes o bien al manejo político clientelar de estas agrupaciones.
Saludos cordiales desde México
Moisés Gómez Porchini
Due to rapid industrialization and in the absence of the necessary backward-forward linkages for inputs and marketing, the small and marginal farmers and agriculture workers in Mehsana district were slowly losing most of their land and assets. In particular, excessive irrigation from bore wells dramatically reduced the water table and rendered the remaining water high in fluoride content; thus, irrigation became exorbitant and without dependable rains, many small and marginal farmers were forced to either migrate or take up casual labour. Women agriculture workers were even harder hit: they could find no alternative work and often had to walk miles to collect the necessary fodder and fuel.
SEWA organized the women agriculture workers into a co-operative. They demanded and eventually received government revenue land. However, it was not an easy process as the existing, disjoint laws in both departments led to a tricky struggle. As per the Co-operative Act, the cooperative could be registered only if the members own land. However, as per the Revenue department, the revenue land could be allotted only to a cooperative.
The struggle dragged on for two and a half years, until finally, with SEWA's continued intervention, the Revenue and the Co-operative department came to a mutually agreeable alternative: the landless agriculture workers had to be registered as a tree growers' cooperative rather than as an agriculture workers' cooperative. They were able to form a cooperative for growing trees on government revenue wasteland. Only then, on registering the cooperative, could the revenue wasteland be allotted.
Through the cooperative, the women systematically planned how to make optimum use of the available land employing a multi-faceted approach. Through partnering with the local Research Station of Gujarat Agriculture University for technical assistance, they were able to maximize production and income by using scientific agriculture practices, including horticulture, agro-forestry, drip irrigation, compost pits, and rainwater harvesting techniques. They utilized low-cost methods of boosting productivity such as designing cropping patterns to enrich the soil. For example, the mung plant's root increases the soil's nitrogen content; therefore, strategic placement and alternation of mung augments subsequent crops. In all activities the cooperative encouraged participation of all village communities and women in their efforts. A green house is also developed at the Centre and the women are trained in raising of crops in the green house and its maintenance.
The members of the Vanlaxmi cooperative developed the wasteland into cultivable land through access to various trainings and agricultural inputs. They have been trained in farm planning and farm management also. These members take 3 crops in a year and use the farm planning techniques to decide on which crops to grow in which season and multi cropping. All this helps the women in improving the productivity and thereby helps tin increasing their income. Also the members grow vegetables, pulses & grains and medicinal plants at the cooperative. This is done with a view to ensure that a family can get the required vegetables, pulses and medicines from the Centre only.
Today, the Vanlaxmi cooperative stands as a model for the entire district of how the landless poor can successfully implement collective agriculture. Women who used to earn just Rs. 15 as agricultural day labourers and, who never engaged themselves in matters of yield, sale, expenditure or market, are now recognized as farmers. They now meticulously manage their land, tracking each and every cost. The cooperative has acquired improved equipment such as a power tiller, thrasher, and a drip irrigation system. The plan also ensures full employment for the members and the land meets the fodder and fuel needs of the village. As it has been licensed as an authorized seed distributor by the Gujarat State Seed Corporation Ltd., the cooperative also provides timely and reasonably priced quality seeds to not only their own village, but to the entire area.
For the past two years the farm is has been developed as a demonstration centre for awareness raising and education to the communities from the other villages and the other districts. This site has been developed as an eco tourism centre; which not only helps in awareness generation among the community at large, but at the same time will also generate income for the women farmers. This is not only be helpful to the rural communities but at the same time students from schools, younger and older generations, private companies from cities and urban areas can also see and learn from the women of the Vanlaxmi Co-operative. The visitors enjoy the day in the calm and serene surroundings of the farm and enjoy the clean atmosphere. The trip starts from Ahmedabad. The tourists are welcomed by a traditional welcome ritual. This is followed by serving the guests breakfast and beverage. This is followed by a tour of the farm. A sumptuous lunch is served thereafter. The evenings are reserved for a local entertainment program followed by a trek back to the city.
As a result of the Vanlaxmi Cooperative, 20 women, who are the members of the cooperative, get an income of Rs 4000-6000 per month through various activities including agriculture. SEWA's approach has been to treat agriculture also as an industry so that agriculture moves form subsistence to becoming viable and profitable.
Sustainability of cooperatives and Saccos, can be looked as well as from the evolution over time of the economic, financial and market conditions of the cooperatives. The original model of a savings and credit society was to mobilize savings from members and pool the same for on lending to the borrowing members. This model worked well, for a while, until foreign parameters like investing in non core businesses and borrowing from commercial organizations, was introduced in the equation.
The dilution of the cooperative model and function came with burden of high cost of capital, which over the years has enslaved the once vibrant sector into an emasculated sector with little innovation to excite the members. Some societies collapsed, further worsening the bad situation.
This has meant that for cooperatives and Saccos to survive, they must enhance current and seek more viable financing models that will support both on lending and capitation requirements. In a world where standards and compliance matter the cooperatives. Must have capacity requirements to meet the requirements set by both the regulators and the financiers in order to drive toward a self-financing Cooperative
Example of Kenya - Prior to the Sacco Societies Act of 2008, the lack of regulation was the main reason for Saccos stagnating: brought by issues of mismanagement, poor structure risk and mismanagement. The setting up of a strong legal and institutional regulatory framework has led to several reforms creating order, sustainability, stability and growth in the sector.
However, under the regulation framework, mandated by Ministry of Cooperatives and enforced by Sacco Societies Regulatory Authority (SASRA), Saccos MUST meet the legal requirements in key capital adequacy in the sector and liquidity ratios to achieve growth and sustainability while operating efficiently.
When cooperatives and Saccos reform, and as the member's confidence with them grows, they will support them through savings, shares and deposits. This is the stage where the cooperatives and Saccos start running from their internally generated funds from the members.
Dear Moderator and members in FSN Forum,
Cooperative and Digital Divides in Nepal's Rural Communities
Evidence shows that some farmers take advantage of digital technology through cooperative. Many Nepalese commercial vegetable farmers have formed cooperative. Some cooperative representatives live in Kathmandu and sell the products sent by farmers from countryside. They also sent instant market price information to farmers on mobile. Based on the information farmers decide whether to harvest their vegetable on the day or wait for a few days. The information also helps them whether sell the product to local brokers or send to Kathmandu. Some farmers used mobile to call cooperative manager and ask availability of fertilizers. Greater number of farmers depends on radio based information of market prices. Some of cooperatives representative put some information in internet and access to members only. Internet based information are used only by brokers and a few rich commercial farmers.
Some farmers do not want to be members in cooperative. When the agricultural inputs are shortage in the market the cooperative often do not sale the inputs to non-members. These evidences indicate there is cooperative as well as digital divide in farming communities. A good extension and training supports to farmers would reduce the digital technology divide and help to utilised potential benefits of cooperative and digital technologies. It is interesting that the people managing extension division and field workers know little about the problem of digital divide and areas for interventions.
Thank you.
Bhubaneswor Dhakal
We should not idealize the cooperative model
Jacques Berthelot (firstname.lastname@example.com), Former lecturer in agricultural policies at universities of Tananarive (Madagascar), Lomé (Togo) and Toulouse. PhD thesis on Les coopératives agricoles en économie concurrentielle, Editions Cujas, 1972.
There are profound contradictions between, on the one hand, small scale Northern and Southern agricultural cooperatives proritizing a strategy of food sovereignty centered on domestic food needs, agro-ecological and labour intensive farming systems and, on the other hand, large-scale Northern cooperatives. Taking the case of the EU – where cooperatives represent 60% of the turnover of the collection, processing and marketing of agricultural products –, the largest cooperatives pursue a strategy similar to the large private agro-industries, creating capitalist subsidiaries abroad and prioritizing the competitiveness of the cooperative business over the prices paid to farmers. To maintain their farmer members' competitiveness they agree with the necessity to enlarge the size of farms with input intensive production systems despite their negative impacts on farm employment and the environment. On the trade side, the EU apex cooperative body, COGECA (Cogeca, Brochure - Agricultural cooperatives in Europe - main issues and trends, 24 November 2010, http://www.copa-cogeca.eu/Main.aspx?page=Papers&lang=en&id=20125), pleads to maintain an efficient import protection within the EU although some large cooperatives prefer a freer trade, but all deny the trade-distorting impact of the huge direct payments received by the EU farmers so that they don't care about their dumping effect and import-substitution effect.
The evaluation by Rainer Kühl of the EU cereals cooperatives concludes: "The larger the size (in turnover or number of members) of the cooperative becomes the more the institutional governance of cooperatives deviates from the traditional cooperative model. More and more the board of directors or the management takes the final decision and there is a growing separation between the member relationship functions, which are assumed by the regional councils and the operational functions, which are assumed by the management. The procedures of internal governance in these cooperatives become more and more similar to those of investor-owned firms. This observation could be made for nearly all cooperatives in all sectors that were analysed" (http://www.lei.dlo.nl/wever.internet/applications/leirapporten/images/sp...).
H.H. Hansen, speaking particularly of Danish cooperatives, is more precise: "Both cooperatives and capital owned companies usually have the objective to ensure owners the highest possible earnings… Profits of member of a cooperative will come through dividends and through more favorable sales or purchase prices… Among the 100 largest food companies in Denmark, 52 per cent of the turn over comes from cooperatives, and 48 per cent from capital owned companies… In recent years, Danish cooperatives have been very focused on global off shoring of production and the use of foreign commodities. For several large cooperatives production abroad now exceeds exports based on the members' own production… Globalization of cooperatives in the form of foreign members, increased use of foreign commodities, investments in foreign production, etc. will imply a shift of paradigm for many cooperatives" (Henning Otte Hansen, Agricultural cooperatives and globalization: A challenge in future?, 2009, http://www.ifmaonline.org/pdf/congress/09_Hansen.pdf).
This globalized strategy can also be seen in France. The French sugar and cereals cooperative Tereos distributed the 13 September 2011 to each of its 12,000 sugar beet Members 180 euros for each of their 173,700 hectares as dividends paid by its private subsidiaries Guarani in Brazil and Companha Sena in Mozambique producing sugar cane and ethanol. Which corresponded to an average dividend of 2,600 euros per cooperative Member (http://www.tereos.com/rapport-annuel-2011/Tereos_rapport_annuel_2011.pdf) but the average revenue of each cooperator from his average 14.5 hectares of sugar beet was of 50,600 euros (including dividends, additional prices and interest on the cooperative shares). However the average beet producer has a farm of around 100 ha – of which about 75 hectares of cereals and 10 hectares of oilseeds and pulses – which generates a decoupled direct payment (the Single Payment Scheme) of around 350 euros per hectare, adding 35,000 euros of revenues per cooperator. And this without taking into account the revenues from high market prices for their cereals, oilseeds and pulses. In other words these sugar beet cooperators are among the richest French farmers.
In September 2011 21,909 employees (excluding the sugar beet cooperators) of Tereos International were working in Brazil and Mozambique or 82.2% of the total 26,657 employees. Tereos annual report for 2008-09 stresses the "cooperative spirit" motivating its actions: "Since its creation, Tereos has drawn from its cooperative origins a specific approach of its development… Tereos begun as soon as the 1990s a diversification allowing it to enlarge its field of activities in new zones (European Union, Brazil, Africa, Indian Ocean)… under the status of subsidiaries of its hard core constituted by the cooperative. This successful diversification is a response to markets globalization and the critical size of its customers and competitors… Thus Tereos' historical activities, its international development and its diversification continue in obeying to the cooperation values – transparency, solidarity and equity –, but with a modern and prospective vision. Tereos is built owing to its cooperative members but also its 13,500 employees who share a well agreed mutual interest, anchored on the various territories" (http://ligaris.dokineo.eu/Tereos).
However, the employees of its sugar factory Sena in Mozambique do not seem to "share a well agreed mutual interest" with the 12,000 Tereos cooperators, as they were periodically on strike. In early July 2008, 7,000 cane cutters accused Sena for not paying the work made on public holidays and not providing the boots and protection equipment required by law (http://ligaris.dokineo.eu/Tereos). The 8 August 2009, 3,000 cane cutters began a strike for 4 days and burnt 150 hectares of sugar cane to protest against the too low wages – the minimal wage in the sugar sector in Mozambique was of 54.3 dollars (38.9 euros) per month in 2009 – and the lack of protection equipment requested the previous year. The 18 September 2009, as the company did not fulfill its commitments to raise wages, the striking employees burnt an ambulance and six of them were injured after police intervention (Na Companhia de Sena: Falta de diálogo precipitou a greve - conclui ministra Helena Taípo, http://macua.blogs.com/moambique_para_todos/2009/09/na-companhia-de-sena...). The situation worsened in 2010 when Brazilian replaced the Maurician managers: the transport premium was suppressed and some employees must walk 10 kilometers, with wages reduced in case of late arrival to the factory (http://portaldesena.blogspot.com/2011/03/mau-relacionamento-na-companhia...). On the other hand the population of Marromeu, where the factory is situated, complains that the ground water is polluted by the leakage of the irrigation water, full of pesticides and fertilizers, and the effluents of the factory (Rodrigues Gaspar, A população de Marromeu preucupada com a agua potavel, 3 de Setembro de 2009, /2009_09_01_archive.html; http://macua.blogs.com/moambique_para_todos/2011/03/mau-relacionamento-n...). Such a situation would likely worsen as Tereos intends to raise the irrigated area from 7,000 ha in 2011 to 10,000 ha in 2014 and finally 30,000 hectares later on, given the irregularities of pluviometry.
On the other hand the control of Sena by Tereos is a good example of the land grabbing going on all over Sub-Saharan Africa. Tereos International, which controls 75% of the Sena company capital, received a concession of 98,000 hectares for 50 years, renewable, with a possible extension of 15,000 hectares. According to Tereos, producing sugar and ethanol in Mozambique presents three advantages: the land belongs to government (what about the traditional land rights?), there are large tax exemptions (reduction of income tax by 80% and total exemption of taxes on dividends) and duty free-quota free exports to the EU, Mozambique being a less developed country benefitting from the EU "Everything but arms" decision of 2000 (http://www.mzweb.com.br/tereosinternacional/web/arquivos/20100608_Tereos...). According to the World Bank (World Bank, Rising Global Interest in Farmland, Can It Yield Sustainable and Equitable Benefits? 7 September 2010, page 30 : http://www.responsibleagroinvestment.org/rai/node/692), investment in the sugar-ethanol chain in Mozambique values the land price at 9,800 dollars per hectare whereas it is rented by the State at 0.6 dollar per hectare per year for 50 years. Such an increase in value implies a profitability rate of 21.4 % per year (0.6 dollar invested at that rate would generate 9,800 dollars after 50 years).
Let us add that Tereos, which produces 40% of the EU sugar, received 117.9 million euros of export refunds for the marketing year from 16 October 2008 to 15 October 2009 (http://news.smh.com.au/breaking-news-world/eu-sugar-companies-big-winner...), plus 12.7 million euros received by its subsidiary of the French overseas department La Réunion, la Sucrerie du Bois Rouge. Incidentally, given also the predominance of cooperatives in the EU cereals and dairy sectors, they were also the main beneficiaries of the EU export refunds, at least before 2010 when they were discontinued.
To conclude we should not be obsessed by the cooperative statutes, in the North or the South. Cooperatives can be the best or worst types of enterprises and it is not necessary to adopt these statutes to put in practice the spirit of cooperation and solidarity. What is clear is that in the EU as in the other Western countries cooperatives share the same profit maximizing objective for their shareholders cooperators as private companies and do not claim to change the CAP rules and the WTO trade rules even though they are unfair for developing countries farmers. In fact COGECA, the coordination body of all EU cooperatives, is closely linked with COPA, the coordination body of the EU mainstream farmers unions which tend to defend the interests of the largest farmers, first of those of arable crops. As most COPA leaders are also national leaders of large cooperatives, they have a clear tendency to defend CAP rules prioritizing the interests of large cooperatives, which are almost the same as the private agro-industries. Which helps to understand why the EU leaders of COPA-COGECA and their national colleagues have no appetite to change the CAP rules and the WTO Agreement on agriculture (AoA) rules, despite their unfair impact on DCs farmers, and to rebuild them on the food sovereignty principle.
In West Africa there are presently few formal cooperatives within the ROPPA network of national platforms of family farmers associations ("organisations paysannes"). Legal statutes much more flexible than cooperatives, as those of "groupings of economic interest" ("groupements d'intérêt économique" or GIE), were largely adopted in Senegal (http://news.smh.com.au/breaking-news-world/eu-sugar-companies-big-winner...), at least to run the economic activities not implying foreign trade. But all these small farmers organizations belong at the same time to national platforms, members of ROPPA (Network of peasant organizations and agricultural producers of West Africa), which defend clearly the necessity to rebuild their national agricultural policies on the promotion of small family farms, agro-ecological production systems and to rebuild the AoA on food sovereignty, a principle they also defend against the Economic Partnership Agreement (EPA) that the EU pressures them to sign. The same positions are shared by the other regional platforms of African farmers organizations – EAFF (East African Farmers Federation), PROPAC (Regional platform of peasant organizations of Central Africa), SACAU (Southern African Confederation of Agricultural Unions), UMAGRI (Farmers Union of Maghreb) –, grouped together in the PFAOP (African platform of peasant organizations). It is this political dimension which is lacking in Western cooperatives which have lost the spirit of solidarity which characterized the founders of the cooperative movement in the 19th century, all viewing cooperatives as a means to build socialist economies.
At a joint conference on 24 April 2012, organised by Euro Coop (consumer co-operatives) and COGECA in Brussels, entitled 'Co-operatives working towards a fair and competitive food supply chain', Claire Bury, Director at Directorate E (Services), backed the idea of integrating co-operative values and principles into the supply chain. Ms Bury said: "The founding fathers of the Equitable Pioneers, in Rochdale, who founded the principles of co-operative movement, brought social conscious into business, which echoes very loudly into the world. These principles are still relevant and make business sense" (http://2012.coop/en/media/news/creating-fair-food-chain-co-operation). For sure but this social consciousness into business should not stop at the EU frontier.
lors du séminaire que nous avons organisé cette année sur les coopératives en agricoles en Algérie, il est apparu que parmi les facteurs de réussite d'une coopérative (COOPSSEL de Sétif: coopérative spécialisée des services d'élevage), figurent surtout: la facilitation de l'accès au crédit de campagne auquel beaucoup de petits éleveurs ne sont pas éligibles ainsi que la valorisation du lait par sa transformation et sa commercialisation.Cette coopérative a en effet innové par la création d'une laiterie fonctionnant uniquement avec le lait de vache. Les petits ateliers laitiers des éleveurs dont la fonction a souvent été l'approvisionnement de la trésorerie servant à l'achat d'intrants et auparavant peu viables pour approvisionner les grandes laiteries étatiques, se sont vus devenir plus importants du fait de la progression de l'attractivité du produit et la souplesse de de sa commercialisation (pas de délais dans la facturation et le payement, facilité de se faire payer en intrants)qui constituent des services parmi d'autres disponibles pour les adhérents de la coopérative.
K. Abbas
Facilitators' feedback - John Rouse and Janos Juhasz
This past week's conference discussions have highlighted a number of important points regarding the topic of cooperative self-reliance and sustainability.
Encouraging farmers to save more.
Agnes Luo Laima (Zambia) argues that governments should create conditions and incentives that encourage farmers to accumulate more savings. We agree that this is critical. It is well known that rural rates of cash savings and investment are too low in many developing countries to support sustainable rural development. Furthermore, evidence shows that farmers with cash savings are more likely to be self-reliant than those without. The same is true with cooperatives. Cooperatives that succeed in accumulating surpluses and attracting member capital to invest in the cooperative business also tend to be more self-reliant and sustainable. Joseph Musuyu points out, rural SACCOs (cooperative credit and savings cooperatives) in Kenya have been relatively successful in mobilizing farmer savings, and the government is now encouraging more SACCOs to be organized alongside existing coffee cooperatives in the hope that this will encourage more sustainable coffee cooperative growth.
Is continuous business turnover a factor in cooperative success?
Joseph Musuya (Kenya) seems to think so He says it's a factor explaining the success of rural SACCOs in achieving self-reliance in his country. Interestingly, dairy cooperatives (which generate more daily transactions per member than other cooperatives engaged in marketing seasonal crops)in many developing countries have also done relatively well. What do you think about this? How might this help in achieving cooperative self-reliance?
Cooperatives are businesses
Christian Chileshe (Zambia) states in his otherwise excellent contribution that "cooperatives are substantially social institutions that have the potential to produce economic and political benefits". We have to disagree with Christian on the over-emphasis that he gives to the social function of cooperatives. Cooperatives are primarily economic organizations that seek to satisfy the economic needs of their members. They may also address other social and other needs of their members, but their primary function and purpose is an economic one. Joseph Musuya (Kenya) further adds that farmers need to run cooperatives as a business, not as an end in itself. We would have to fully agree with Joseph on that point, because if cooperatives are not managed as a business, they will surely fail.
The pros and cons of vertical integration
Several participants (Igbine-Nigeria; Luo Laima-Zambia; and Steele-Italy) have raised the question of where cooperatives should position themselves within the marketing chain. It's well known that profit margins per unit sold are highest near the top of the marketing chain rather than near the bottom. That would seem to be a powerful argument favoring the vertical integration of cooperative marketing structures to capture these margins. However, it's important to realize that not all vertically integrated cooperative structures are self-reliant and sustainable and the ones that are are built upon a sound foundation of self-reliant primary cooperatives at local level who help capitalize the structure and to protect their member equity stake in the enterprise, ensure that higher level management of the structure is responsive to their member needs. Unfortunately, many of the federated cooperative union structures one finds in Africa have changed little since colonial times and remain top-down structures, heavily controlled and financed by the government rather than by base members and, as a result, are neither democratically run nor self-reliant .
An interesting case study
Peter Steele mentions the case of smallholder potato producers in Nyabyumba, Uganda, where a 120 member marketing association of potato producers was formed from six smaller Farmer Field School groups. The case would seem to be a good example of a bottom-up approach to self-reliant cooperative and rural producer organization development. However, the case study lacks data on that one important point. The association earns a profit but it's not clear on the extent to which the organization has reached technical and financial self-reliance. is such information available?
Laws and policies that encourage self-reliant cooperatives
Lizzy Nneka Igbine (Nigeria) recommends that the promotion of self-reliant and sustainable cooperatives be made a government priority and presumably set down in legislation or formal government policy. We think that formalizing this as an objective of government might help. It certainly wouldn't hurt.
Areas of cooperative action
In her contribution Ms Igbine, Nigeria complains that "high prices of food…go to sharp practices of middlemen". This raises the issue of the potential areas for cooperatives activities. Experience shows that in agriculture, in addition to primary production, cooperatives have great potential and are most needed in the up-stream and the down-stream sectors, i.e. in the supply of farm inputs and in the processing and marketing of farm products. These are the two sectors of the product chain take the overwhelming share of the consumer dollar spent on food and this is the money farmers should aim to get access to through cooperation.
Financial partnering with rural producer organizations and cooperatives.
Fabrice Larue (France) mentions in an interesting contribution that progressive financial institutions need to think more seriously about business partnering with some of the more mature rural producer organizations where sound investment opportunities exist, but to do so, they will have to improve their understanding of how these organizations work and analyze their investment risk. We couldn't agree more. But at the same time, cooperatives and other producer organizations also need to better understand how these financial institutions analyze investment risk and what are the expected costs and benefits of risk sharing between the two.
We forgot to remind you of one thing
We would like to remind all participants that a whole list of useful publications and manuals is available for downloading on the conference's main page in the rightmost column. Take a look! You might find something useful.
We look forward to your response to our comments.
John Rouse and Janos Juhasz
Why Rural SACCOS are more successful than Rural Cooperatives.
I think rural SACCOS are more commercially inclined than their SACCOS which unfortunately in many cases seem to be stuck as being social enterprises, who don't seem to grasp well concepts of 'doing business'. Rural cooperatives are have a lot of the yesteryear illusions of state subsidies, funding and cheap capital, which unfortunately it is no more. The rural SACCOS on the hand, being commercially driven are innovative to create business for the benefit of their members. They consider their members, equally as investors too who want to earn profit. As a result they have adapted and developed business networks outside the traditional cooperative movement which they tap into, and leverage more resources for their members.
Historically, rural cooperatives have had an external hand, be it in the form of state/government subsidy ( even if at district or local level), they have had political inclinations at times and also their focus on service combine to make them less business oriented. The SACCOS, always have this dedicated group of a few people who have a sense of a customer friendliness to grow their business. Across Africa, the financial requirements of the people are not homogeneous and often vary according to the local conditions and circumstances. The rural SACCOs succeed here through customization of credit packages, which they base also on the nature of activities the credit is to support.
The rural SACCOS that are successful also dues to necessity divert into different financial products, including savings mobilization, short, medium and long term loans, loans in Kind and even transfer services.
The rural cooperatives, which have are mainly single commodity based, tend to operate ''seasonally''. Their activities peak at times of say harvesting and marketing and getting inputs. They get accustomed to this cycle and have no room for innovation or adaptability. They cease to be a model for doing business. Vital part of any cooperative organization is its members and their active participation in and loyalty to the cooperative is integral for its success. With a season to season patronage of the service of the cooperative this can be tested to the limit. It can affect their attitude towards the cooperative negatively.
A question that begs answering.
Why do rural credit and savings cooperatives seem to be more successful at achieving sustainable business self reliance than other types of rural cooperatives? What methods and incentives do they use to attract member savings and capital to invest in the cooperative business? Can some of these methods be adapted for use in other types of cooperatives? What do you think?


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The Southwest Michigan Postcard Club held its fall show and sale this past weekend, an event which usually leads to some interesting historical finds. This time around, I went with one specific purpose in mind—to locate images of Kalamazoo's early musicians. Photo postcards of this nature are often difficult to locate, and this hunt proved to be no exception… until one card caught my eye—a nondescript photo of an orchestra, taken by a known local photographer (Austin) and postmarked 9 March 1908 in Kalamazoo. Information on the back of the card stated "they" would be performing in Ionia on the 17th of March, and was signed F. O. Pinkham. (Pinkham was also identified as "lower row, 2nd from right" in the photo.) But the exact identity of the orchestra remained a mystery.
Kalamazoo College Mandolin Orchestra, ca. 1908
After doing some speedy detective work, we were able to determine that the photo was of the Kalamazoo College Mandolin Orchestra taken about 1908. Formed in 1907, the orchestra was the first to debut R. F. Holden's newly penned composition, Kazoo, which was to become the 'K' Alma Mater. In March 1908, the orchestra made a successful concert tour of Southern Lower Michigan, with stops in several towns, including Grand Rapids, and on the 17th of March, Ionia. A featured performer with the orchestra was a tenor singer named Fred Oliver Pinkham, further confirming the identity of the orchestra pictured on the card.
Learn more about Kalamazoo's early musicians in KPL's collection of Local History essays. And be your own detective. Contact the Local History Room for help in identifying some of your own photographs. You might be surprised at what you'll find!
Posted by Keith Howard at 10/11/2010 10:04:33 AM |


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Top Definition
Slang term for 'locked up', created in reference to the sound the cell door makes upon closing.
Deshaun got clanked for three years for that robbery charge.
dodane przez Copythatagentk luty 10, 2011
when dancing and a dudes balls clank together making an odd sound
I was so embarrassed last night while dancing with my lady friend I clanked!
dodane przez geex ( geek and sexy) listopad 03, 2010


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Learning about Arguments by Making Arguments part of State Your Case:Activities
This is an activity that teaches basic argumentation skills such as generating and formulating claims, presenting evidence , oral and written communication.
Too many deer? A public hearing part of Pedagogy in Action:Library:Teaching with the Case Method:Examples
Students reenact a public hearing to determine how to manage a deer herd that is overpopulated.
Recycle -- or not? A case from New York City part of Pedagogy in Action:Library:Teaching with the Case Method:Examples
A case for the analysis of externalities (social costs and benefits) in the context of recycling. Drawn from a program in New York City.
Analyzing Data on American Political Divisions part of Pedagogy in Action:Library:Quantitative Writing:Examples
Students conducted data analysis about American political divisions and created two papers from this data analysis. Sutdents were assigned to group projects involving data analysis assigned chapters in MICROCASE AMERICAN GOVERNMENT, a textbook that includes access to a variety of datasets.
American Politics Group Data Projects part of Pedagogy in Action:Library:Quantitative Writing:Examples
SETUPS (Empirical Teaching Unites in Political Science) data, published by the American Political Science Association, will be employed in group data analysis projects in an American Government class. Students then use results from these reports in composing an essay question on the course's final exam.


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Oxford Collection by Hudson Valley
Two pendants and two sconces make up the Hudson Valley Lighting Oxford Collection. A see-through glass box reveals candelabra style lights with exposed bulbs. These traditional fixtures come in three finishes, aged brass, polished nickel, and old bronze. Install a pendant in your foyer and the sconces in your living room, den, or hallway.


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Dress up your daughter to be as pretty as a princess with our Deluxe Child's Southern Belle Costume. This princess outfit includes a green and gold dress with a satin white center panel. This colonial era design is a perfect fit if you are trying to create a southern beauty look or European princess ensemble. In the Civil War era of he southern United States, wealthy women might as well have been queens. Royalty comes in all forms, and Disney Princesses are not the only kind. This look is more indicative of modern high society than medieval queens. Add some fun accessories to your style like parasols, wigs, gloves, ballet flats, Mary Jane shoes, and lace fans. Treat your daughter some fancy duds with our girl's southern belle princess costume.
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text: Fanfarlo are a London-based indie pop band formed in 2006 by Swedish musician Simon Balthazar, and Giles J Davis (who subsequently left before the release of the first single). They fuse elements of folk, indie rock and post punk using eclectic instrumentation including trumpet, violin, mandolin, musical saw and clarinet. The band, whose name comes from the Charles Baudelaire novella 'La Fanfarlo', started performing live in small London indie clubs in 2006, and released four limited edition 7" singles on London-based indie labels (one of which a split single with Sleeping States) throughout 2006-2008. Their debut album, 'Reservoir', was recorded in October/November 2008 at Tarquin Studios, Connecticut, USA and was produced by Peter Katis (The National, Interpol). The album was released in February 2009 on the band's own label Raffle Bat and later licensed to the Atlantic imprint Canvasback, who released it in the UK and US in October 2009 and in Europe in April 2010. Their single 'The Walls Are Coming Down' was released during September 2009. The music video for the single was directed by Iain Forsyth and Jane Pollard and features escape artist Roslyn Walker performing the Hanging Straitjacket Escape, a stunt first performed by Harry Houdini in the early 1900s. The stunt was also incorporated into the band's show at Webster Hall in New York on December 19, 2009 (this time by escape artist Michael Lee).


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Veterinarians at the zoo estimate 15-year-old Lun Lun will deliver a cub in two to three weeks, Zoo Atlanta officials said in a news release. An ultrasound done Sunday shows the fetus is currently 1.08 centimeters long. Veterinarians based their birth window estimate on a similar ultrasound from Lun Lun's last pregnancy in 2010.
The cub would be the first giant panda born in the U.S. this year.
"We're thrilled about the possibility of a fourth cub for Lun Lun, but we remain cautiously optimistic at this point. Giant panda cubs are extremely fragile, and the chance remains that the fetus does not go to term," zoo president and CEO Raymond B. King said. "A birth would be another success for our giant panda program, and we share our optimism with our fellow U.S. zoos housing this iconic species and with our colleagues at the Chengdu Research Base of Giant Panda Breeding in China."
Pandas sometimes act pregnant even when they are not, but the ultrasound has confirmed that Lun Lun is pregnant. Hormone tests done by Dr. Dave Kersey, an expert in giant panda endocrinology from Western University of Health Sciences, will allow the veterinary team to continue to monitor her condition.
Lun Lun was artificially inseminated in March.


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Events Calendar
SCA Community Meeting
Sage is pleased to welcome Chris Brunner, former reporter and news director, as the Community Meeting speaker. Brunner will discuss the impact of the September 11, 2001 attacks on our local news outlets.
Date: Wednesday, September 7th, 2011
Time: 12:30 pm
Duration: 1 hour
Location: Opalka Gallery
Sponsored by: News + Events
Contact: Ketti Horton
The Community Meeting is a SCA tradition that celebrates the beginning of the academic year. This opening community gathering is an opportunity for students, faculty and administrators to participate in a campus-wide academic discussion of issues relating to higher education.


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Republican presidential candidate Donald Trump came to Las Vegas on Oct. 8, insulted most of his rivals, bashed the media, called the current crop of American leaders incompetent and promised to make America great again. Again.
JONESVILLE — Nash Drugs in Jonesville has attracted another new pharmacist with the desire to serve the community. Paul Landini will serve in the Nash Drugs Pharmacy location on East Chicago Street in Jonesville. As a licensed...
If it's possible to judge a city's dining scene by its burgers, then these 10 cities are America's food capitals.
If lovers want to exchange vows in the future, they might want to disclose credit scores now, a paper from the U.S. Federal...
Tensions among three of the Republican presidential hopefuls vying for support from the establishment wing of the party burst into public view this week after their campaign vehicles were involved in a pileup en route to an event in Cedar Rapids,...
Officials in Charlotte, North Carolina, are considering whether to create "public safety zones," areas within the city where people with past convictions, and merely arrests, would be restricted from entering.
While ordering Domino's with a simple pizza emoji text or tweet may seem like a one-step process, the act itself is tedious (at best) and could potentially leave you starving for pizza.
A Pew Research Center report indicated U.S. immigrants are more likely to have a college degree but less likely to have a high school diploma than American citizens, making them a "bifurcated" group, according to Slate.
An early morning fight between two groups of students escalated into gunfire in the parking lot outside an Arizona university dormitory, leaving one person dead and three others wounded, authorities said Friday.
CAMDEN — Before their match against Camden-Frontier on Thursday night, the North Adams-Jerome Rams learned that starter Alyssa Forbes will miss the next four to six weeks with a stress fracture. "That hit the girls hard...
JONESVILLE – In sports, as in life 'it's not where you start, but where you finish' that matters and Thursday night, Jonesville finished with a 3-0 win over Quincy on the soccer pitch in Jonesville. Jonesville almost didn't have a...
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