text:
Feeding the ultimate troll.
Al Uthman
Belafonte can't shake tally-man past.
Christopher Famighetti
Small Rabbit out of a Big Hat
Pentagon media moguls cancel Zarqawi.
Stan Goff
Qaeda Idol
Vote for the next #2!
BEAST Conservative Q&A
Answering questions that plague Republicans.
for WGRZ anchor Ron Plants!
with Road Rage
What can you do?
Scott Borchert
Hits Hollywood
The Big Buy: Tom DeLay's Stolen Congress
Movie Review by Matt Cale
for Dollars
Blog by boys in blue bodes badly for Buffalo
Brian Higgins, the enemy within
3 Lesbian Superhero
Korner: Movies
Nacho Libre, The Lake House, Tokyo Drift,
Garlfield, Cars & A Prairie Home Companion
Your cosmic fortune in insult form.
- Letters
Moses mania, junk science, vegan carnivores,
& retroactive plagiarism
Around the Aisle
House leaders move to protect House leaders.
Al Uthman
Striking for Osama
Churchill was right; Gandhi was a terrorist.
Alexander Zaitchik
Science for Hicks
A quck & fatal introduction to science
for the logically challenged.
Ian Murphy
BEAST Aeronautic Defense Technology Roundup
What's new in death from above.
Great Genesee Cream Ale Challenge
A decent excuse for us to get hammered.
Always Knew Canadians were Terrorist-loving Bastards
A BEAST Reader Opinion.
Death Offset by Fantastic Accumulation of Possessions
Josh Righter
"Sour Grapes" E-mail Determined to be a Forgery
Who's behind the malicious hoax?
to Buffalo: We're 51.4% Behind You
Homeland Security budget cuts reveal predictable
BEAST 50 Most Loathsome People in America, 2005
Geraldo Rivera
A mustache only slightly less loathsome than Tom Friedman's-if
only because fewer people take Rivera seriously. Began his career
as a seemingly skilled and passionate muckraker, but having been
exposed countless times as a shameless, megalomaniacal fraud, he
absolutely refuses to get out of our living rooms. Most recently,
Geraldo was accused of making a frail, elderly victim of Hurricane
Katrina whom he "rescued" do multiple takes of the rescue
scene with Rivera for Fox News cameras. Geraldo heroically carried
the woman's dog.
A: Claims he defected from CNBC to Fox News for patriotic reasons.
Sealed inside Al Capone's vault with a phalanx of Neo-nazis
armed with folding chairs.
Michelle Malkin
A curious case of racial Stockholm syndrome with a palpable
lust for violent ideological oppression and displays of imperial
power. Rose to prominence in conservative circles by congratulating
white America for its most shameful chapter since slavery, and
encouraging a return to form in her book, In Defense of Internment.
Malkin thinks it's hunky-dory to detain an entire demographic
indefinitely if it makes the rest of us feel more comfortable.
Her newest, Unhinged, argues that liberals have lost
their minds, because they are upset with the direction their
country is taking. Her evidence is a carefully collected selection
of the dumbest things liberals have ever said, as if she couldn't
have just as easily filled an entire library with the insane
ravings of right-wingers. Her accusations of blind hatred and
vitriol mimic soul sister Ann Coulter's classic tactic of psychological
projection: whatever Malkin is, she sees in her opponents.
A: Internment was so irresponsible that it prompted 40
history professors to sign a letter condemning it.
Detained indefinitely without charge and waterboarded hourly
for looking at a cop "all slanty-like."
Larry the Cable Guy
The absolute nadir of the American South's baffling cultural
hegemony. A middle-class Nebraskan, raised in Palm Beach, whose
parents sent him to private school, masquerading as an Appalachian
mutant and making millions off the nine-toed cyclopes in his audience
by calling his material "blue collar," when it's really
just a celebration of proud ignorance. The latest in a long line
of "entertainers" propagating the lie that real talent
is elitist. The South has risen again—just long enough to grab the
rest of the nation by the legs and pull it back down to its Lovecraftian
depths. Isn't even "bad funny." Makes Jeff Foxworthy look
like Chris Rock.
A: Ostensibly humorous catchphrase translates into "complete
the task."
Sent back in time for the sole purpose of having Mark Twain's
cigars extinguished on his face.
Martha Stewart
Only in America could a plutocrat and insider trader find
sympathy among her social inferiors—people she would have either
sterilized or mustard gassed, if the law permitted her. Stewart,
a woman so frigid she makes Gila monsters look cuddly, rode
this wave of infamy to a resurgence in popularity and a second
television show. To the nation's delight, she then used this
public forum to demean the aborigines in her charge with robotic
mordancy. Is in obvious discomfort when laughing. Would have
drowned the survivors on the Titanic and used their corpses
as a human pontoon to walk to dry land.
A: Seemed to genuinely enjoy prison.
Forced to use own K-Mart products.
Bruce Chapman
Founder of the misnamed "Discovery Institute." Despite
its pioneering title, Chapman's organization seeks to make one of
the world's oldest, dumbest ideas the prevailing ideology, to "undiscover"
evolution and set us back more than a century. Seems to believe
a petition signed by 400 PhDs and professors is convincing proof
of Intelligent Design's widespread acceptance, when more scientists
named "Steve" endorse Darwin. A lazy dissembler, he blames
the lack of actual research and peer-reviewed articles on ID on
academic "blackballing." Right, 'cause Galileo had it
easy. Chapman's sole trailblazing achievement in the field of academic
inquiry has been in proving scientists can be even smugger--when
driven by theology.
A: Held high-level positions under Reagan and Bush, Sr. Is not
a scientist.
Infested and colonized by scabies mites: eyeless, brainless
parasites unique to humans—perfectly evolved to afflict us. Succumbing
to the maddening itch, Chapman skins himself alive.
Robert Novak
The absence of charges, for one. While the Valerie Plame
leak scandal has taken down one prominent reporter and tarnished
the reputation of several others, Novak—the one who actually printed
the leak—remains inexplicably unscathed, unless you count the profane
bout of crankiness that got his satanic ass bounced to Fox News,
where, after all, he really belongs. Either Novak has secretly revealed
his sources, damaging his already dubious journalistic credibility,
or he is simply so well ensconced in the Washington power structure
that he can't be removed, like a metastasized tumor.
A: The sheer, dreadful, angler-fish ugliness of the man, which
can only be explained by the gradual accumulation of several lifetime's
worth of misanthropy, or possibly possession by demonic entity.
Finds himself chained to a desk with James Carville; figures
out he's in hell only after several weeks pass without winning a
single argument.
George Lucas
It needs to be said: George Lucas is an awful writer and a shitty,
shitty director. His second Star Wars trilogy absolutely sucked
from beginning to end, and was in fact the least brave creative
endeavor he could possibly have chosen, a guaranteed grand slam.
Lucas has grown so accustomed to massive commercial success that
he has no idea he's putting out the worst work of his career, and
no one dares to tell him. Ultimately, it doesn't matter, because
an army of sexless, sedentary thirty-something dweebs with an unhealthy
fixation on Princess Leia will insist that his schlock is
brilliant as if their lives depend on it, and an absurdly disproportionate
media blitz always brings the kids in. But everything that was great
about the first trilogy—reasonably decent acting, an engaging storyline
and cool model-based special effects—is gone, replaced by detestably
unsympathetic characters reciting torturously bad dialogue in a
manner so wooden that coaching from Keanu Reeves would have helped,
and CGI effects that, while painstakingly crafted down to the nanopixel,
somehow looked less real than plastic spaceships and Muppets.
A: Already revising the new trilogy for DVD releases.
Cast into the gaping maw of Tatooine's all-powerful Sarlacc
and digested alive for a thousand years, along with a talkative
Jar Jar Binks.
Rush Limbaugh
Rather than engage in the admittedly difficult task of justifying
GOP policies rationally, the key to Limbaugh's success is attracting
an audience that actually yearns to be lied to. It doesn't matter
how many righteous fact-checkers assail him in print and on the
web, because dittoheads don't care that he's lying, as long as the
lies justify their prejudices. Limbaugh's program is not just hypocritical;
it is a celebration of hypocrisy for ignorant crackers, angry
at smart people and strung out on the dwindling sensation that they
are better than everyone else by virtue of their race, sex, nationality
or level of bluster, because their character and accomplishments
don't warrant such feelings. If political discussion were sex, the
Limbaugh audience would be a horde of virgins beating off to deranged
rape fantasies.
A: Started out in sports radio; hasn't changed his approach
one bit.
Starved to death in full view of glazed ham; ACLU mistakenly
bestowed entire estate due to barbecue sauce stain on last will
and testament.
Nancy Grace
Revenges herself nightly for the murder of her fiancée on every
criminal suspect and defendant; facts be damned. Despite her viscous,
Gump-like hyper-drawl, her brain can barely keep pace. Looks like
a camel in drag. Her crude vindictiveness is to the myth of the
southern belle what Roots was to the myth of the genteel South.
A: Repeatedly utters a snarling "You know what?" at
guests who question her-not as a rhetorical device, but as a declarative
Wrongly convicted and summarily executed by intrauterine electrocution
on national television, so horrifying the nation that capital punishment
is thenceforth outlawed.
Charles Krauthammer
Considered an intellectual authority among neocons, Krauthammer,
like his colleagues George Will and Tony Blankley, really only presents
a passable facsimile of gravitas, substituting vocabulary for intelligence,
mischaracterization for argument, and intolerable haughtiness for
authority. The fact that this wanton fascist's opinions are not
only considered fit for mainstream consumption, but among the cream
of the conservative crop, is a maddening indictment of both the
media and conservative movement.
A: Posed a hypothetical scenario involving 9/11 "architect"
Kalid Sheikh Mohammed to advocate legalizing torture, when the actual
Kalid Sheikh Mohammed was actually tortured without any such
Lockheed-designed bionic exoskeleton he receives from Dick Cheney
in exchange for opposing stem cell research goes berserk, ignoring
Krauthammer's excited protestations as it uses its powerful titanium
arms to pulverize his loved ones and donate his life savings to
40. Tom Cruise
Criminal narcissism. After mega-lawyer Bert Fields threatened
to sue The BEAST over Cruise's inclusion in
last year's Loathsome List, we responded by giving him the editorial
finger, and bracing ourselves for the legal spanking of our
lives. Instead, the episode seemed to trigger a cascading ego crisis,
culminating in a rapid and irrecoverable image downgrade from exalted
idol to ridiculous buffoon. From his laughable claim of psychological
expertise to his worst acting performance ever—as a man in love—Cruise
simply cracked up on camera in 2005, and a public hitherto willing
to overlook his obsessively inauthentic personality and comical
religious affiliation had finally had enough. Cruise is a perfect
example of a person who is simultaneously in love with and completely
unfamiliar with himself, living in perpetual fear of self-actualization,
and asserting a legal right to live free of criticism. A guy who
can do whatever the hell he wants, yet chooses to devote his life
to maintaining the public perception that he is somebody else.
A: "I care man, I care. I care about you. I care about
your children. I care about these people here in this room. Every
one of you. And I...I mean it. That is not just some words to me.
That is a promise." Seriously, can't even act like a human
A lifetime of forced, joyless sex with famously beautiful women,
only to have his colossal gay porn library posthumously bequeathed
to the Smithsonian by bitter, unloved offspring.
Dr. David Hager
A Bush appointee to the FDA who was the key figure in its rejection
of emergency oral contraceptive Plan B as an over the counter drug,
which Hager bragged was the second time in fifty years the FDA has
ruled against the overwhelming approval of its own advisory committee.
The author of books like Stress and the Woman's Body and
As Jesus Cared for Women, Hager repeatedly sodomized his ex-wife
for years against her will, alternately apologizing for or denying
it when confronted by her, offering excuses like "You asked
me to do that" and "Oh, I didn't mean to have anal sex
with you; I can't feel the difference," she told The Nation.
Seems a bit fishy, a supposed authority on women's health who can't
detect such a significant distinction with his most sensitive instrument.
A: "My official comment is that I decline to comment."
A three-day group ramming by the multi-dildoed Oregon chapter
of NOW, after which Hager will walk with a pronounced limp, never
to regain control of his sphincter, and discover himself to be inexplicably
Mr. Blackwell
Has made a career of releasing an annual list judging the most
superficial members of society based solely on their most superficial
aspects. Richard's "Worst Dressed" celebrity lists have
all the redeeming qualities of syphilis. Is clearly motivated by
jealousy towards young, beautiful women, because he knows he can
never be one.
A: Routinely cited by E!, Entertainment tonight and People
Magazine; we've got to settle for Celebrity Justice.
Teeth extracted with pliers and used to bedazzle Britney Spears's
jean jacket.
Donovan McNabb
Played so poorly that his demoralized and alienated teammates
yearned for the return of ego-vampire Terrell Owens. A chocolate
commodity so inoffensive he makes Hershey bars look militant. Responded
indignantly to loopy criticism from the head of the Philly NAACP,
but laughed off Rush Limbaugh's racist broadsides. Choked in the
fourth quarter of Super Bowl; this year he enjoyed the worst fourth
quarter passer rating in the league. Made over $11,000,000 in 2004.
A: Logged only significant playing time this season with his
mom in soup commercials.
Peon at a Campbell's Soup cannery in China. Flogged routinely
for underperformance.
John Rendon
The man behind the man behind the curtain. His PR firm created
the Iraqi National Congress in 1991 and dubbed Ahmed Chalabi its
brave leader. Has been on the CIA's list of organizations to funnel
money to since the key role it played ousting Noriega from Panama
for papa Bush. Three weeks after 9/11 the Rendon Group began collecting
a $326,000 a month paycheck for disseminating Iraq war propaganda
by organizing and funding the INC, amongst other activities such
as bribing and coercing foreign journalists to beat the drum for
war. The Rendon Group played matchmaker between Ahmed Chalabi, Judith
Miller and a well-trained Iraqi defector with wild, polygraph-disproved
claims of vast WMD stockpiles. A former McGovern supporter and lifelong
Democrat who enjoys his life as the Goebbels of outsourcing.
A: This self described "information warrior" produced
the now infamous tight shot short film of the falling Saddam Hussein
statue with a small, yet enthused cast of INC players he had shipped
into town with CIA money and planes.
Paid handsomely to saturate the global media with fabricated
reports that the cure for cancer is "punching John Rendon in
the throat."
Michael Brown
Second fiddle to Bush's Nero—except that while New Orleans sank,
Michael Brown just fiddled with himself. A man of geological indolence,
Brown makes lichens seem dynamic. Despite being woefully unqualified
for his job as FEMA director, it was Brown's lethal callousness
that really astounded (and killed) so many Americans. When one of
only two FEMA employees Brown had vouchsafed New Orleans wrote two
days after Katrina that "the situation is past critical,"
Brown responded, "Thanks for the update. Anything specific
I need to do or tweak?" When he finally arrived in Louisiana,
Brown was preoccupied with demanding more time to eat dinner at
a Baton Rouge restaurant, instead of sucking down an MRE and getting
to work doing his incredibly important job, like a fucking man.
Brown reacted to the most important moment in his life like an immature
college student who realizes he's fucking up the semester and stops
going to class without telling anyone. No human being can possibly
be this ineffective unless he simply doesn't give a shit if people
A: In subsequent communications, Brown asked, "Can I quit
now? Can I come home?" and complained about trouble finding
a dog sitter. With almost comical indifference to those actually
suffering, he wrote: "I'm trapped now, please rescue me."
What else? Dehydrated, starved, and slowly baked to death on
a Ninth Ward rooftop while repeatedly buzzed by news helicopters.
Body secretly recovered and incinerated by Blackwater operatives
as part of a Cheney-initiated campaign to keep casualty figures
artificially low.
Scooter Libby
Known as "germ boy" within the administration for
his obsession with creating panic over biological warfare in order
to facilitate huge government vaccine purchases and alter markets
to the benefit of big pharmaceutical industry stock holders like
Rumsfeld, George Shultz and himself. Sound familiar? A high-level
fall guy, responsible for leaking what was in the interest of profit,
not leaking what wasn't, and barking on cue to produce the noise
of governance without the drawbacks of actual governance.
A: "The Aspens turn in clusters," or something.
Raped by bear.
Johnny Damon
Any baseball player with highlights in his hair should be faced
with the same penalty system applied to those using performance-enhancing
steroids. It's ruining the game. And if a ball player is going to
grow a beard, it should be a Charlie Manson/Thurman Munson scraggle
of bushy whiskers, not a neatly manicured and softly conditioned
frame for your pretty face. The only thing that got Damon to step
into line and quit hair-farming was a 52 million dollar check from
the New York Yankees. Boston prayed for the multi-bladed Gillette
that officially made him a Yankee to slip while gliding over his
Adam's apple and spill his lifeblood into the bathroom sink.
A: Going from the Red Sox to the Yankees is like fucking the
guy that murdered your husband.
Killed by barrage of hurled D cell batteries when he takes the
field at Fenway next season.
Kenneth Tomlinson
Hired to infiltrate the Corporation for Public Broadcasting,
making way for a GOP takeover of the final outlet for objective,
fact-based TV reporting left largely unsullied by corporate manipulation.
Why is it that whenever conservatives complain about the "liberal
bias" of investigative journalism programs, they seek to "balance"
them out with shows that feature wealthy Republicans sitting in
chairs and talking? And why is that those who rail against "racial
quotas" have no problem with affirmative action when it's applied
to newsroom ideology? Tomlinson's heavy-handed invasion was so objectionable
that he was forced to resign, but he left behind some real gems:
new CPB president and CEO Patricia Harrison was co-chair of the
RNC, Assistant Secretary of State and oversaw the production of
now-notorious fake news segments for the White House; and the new
Chairwoman and Vice Chairwoman are both major donors to the RNC.
Look forward to a new, more "balanced" era in public broadcasting.
A: Next year's children's special, "Elmo and Milton Friedman's
Supply Side Christmas Adventure."
Life as Bill Moyers' butler, including sponge baths and diaper
Rita Cosby
Unholy pastiche of fearmongering and celebrity ringworm with
the brain of a moth, the integrity of a tapeworm, and the appearance
and larynx of a sugar-addicted, glass-eating drag queen.
A: Her banter with Joe Scarborough kills children.
Kicked in the nuts.
Hillary Clinton
Let's face it: one reason the Republicans have done so well
in recent elections (aside from touch screen voting machines) is
that they are consistent in their views, however nuts they are,
while "new Democrats" like Clinton are willing to hump
every fence they come across. Hillary's recent triangulation on
issues like flag-burning and naughty video games has no right-wing
equivalent in reality, but it would be something like Alaska Senator
Ted Stevens launching a campaign against logging. Claims to pray
all the time, which even her supporters know is bullshit.
A: Will probably cause yet another tragic Republican presidency.
Designated cookie-baker for Feminists for Life.
Terri Schiavo
Sacrificed her grey matter to vanity, only to become the focus
of a manufactured media blitz involving the character assassination
of her husband, the selective coverage of fifty protestors by 200
reporters, and a disgusting demonstration of congressional overreaching,
all in deference to a frightening fringe culture's farcical take
on ethics. If you can't tell a brain-dead oxygen-waster from a fetus,
you've got no place debating policy or exploiting a devastated family
to further your idiotic agenda or political career.
A: As confirmed by a conspicuously underreported autopsy, Schiavo
feels the same about her current situation as she did a year ago.
To have the circumstances of her death become a bizarre political
freakshow; to be worshipped as a religious idol by weak-minded weirdoes
who never knew her, stripping her and her family of all dignity
as she lies, powerless to stop it, in a hospital bed. Oh, right.
Never mind.
Joe Lieberman
Technically there are 55 Republicans in the Senate, but that's
not counting their favorite shill Joe Lieberman. He's a Democrat
because…well…he's from Connecticut. And he's Jewish. But Lieberman
has spent his time since "losing" to Bush/Cheney in 2000
spooning the White House and attempting to inoculate their increasingly
insane policies from legitimate criticism. Resembles Tex Avery cartoon
character Droopy Dog in voice, demeanor, and spinelessness.
A: "Freedom of religion doesn't mean freedom from religion."
Apparently, it also doesn't mean freedom from asinine revisionism.
Made into Oval Office footstool.
Ann Coulter
The fact that Coulter is considered desirable by Republicans
betrays their sick and masochistic nature. We saw Coulter in person
this year, and she is a revolting skeleton with a boob job and a
grotesquely oversized head, who feeds only on the hatred of her
target audience, liberals. Sole redeeming quality is that she is
impossible to take seriously--she's really more of a shock comic
than a political commentator, whether she knows it or not.
A: "I'm getting a little fed up with hearing about, oh,
civilian casualties."
Confined to Mississippi; forever banned from interacting with
the lefty intellectuals she lives to antagonize.
Wasting billions of minutes of time and millions of dollars
in bandwidth on the thin hope that a few poor saps will be stupid
enough to believe that a Nigerian banker actually wants to give
them millions of dollars, or that responding to an unsolicited e-mail
is the smart way to refinance their mortgage or enlarge their penis.
Every day, we must perform the tedious task of combing through our
e-mail and deleting the nine tenths of it which consist of the most
retarded marketing in history, along with mean-spirited swindles
and ads for the vilest pornography imaginable. All because these
jack-offs can think of no better way to support themselves than
by pestering the entire fucking planet.
A: Your inbox.
Faces repeatedly smashed into keyboards until dead; bodies made
into actual Spam; greedily devoured by Nigerian bankers.
Paris Hilton
Won't go away. A head so empty, the rails of coke that sustain
her must dissipate in clouds around her ears; this residual high
the only explanation anyone would come within five feet of her.
Brainless, her spinal cord defies physics, like an Indian rope trick.
Her Carl's Jr. commercial, while an uninspired approximation of
eroticism, was still hotter than her actual "sex" tape,
in which she only made noise when she wasn't screwing—that's
not hot. Squints inexplicably for photo ops, suggesting even minimal
focus is beyond her. Her continued success as a celebrity famous
for nothing, despite the eerie resemblance she bears to the inbred
banjoist from Deliverance and a lack of talent so profound that
others become duller as they approach her, indicates that something
is fundamentally wrong with humanity.
A: Somehow, everybody in America knew that this completely pointless
person had lost her dog, and we are all diminished by the experience.
Locked in a room with a high steel ceiling which lowers a centimeter
per hour, until she either solves a Rubik's cube or is crushed;
whichever comes first.
Jim Guckert
The most hilariously twisted figure of 2005, including Michael
Jackson. Guckert, better known as Jeff Gannon, truly lived a life
in need of two names: the upright, macho, McCarthyite Clark Kent
and the buff, military-fetish prostitute Superfag. Gannon symbolized
so many things: the exponential erosion of journalistic standards,
the fundamental hypocrisy in the heart of each Republican (further
evidenced by their charges of "gay-bashing" when liberals
could not conceal their amusement at his outing), unseemly conflicts
of interest between the press and the GOP, etc. But what was lost
in the sauce was that Gannon was a straight-up plagiarist, actually
copying and pasting sections of White House press releases into
his articles, and we don't mean quotations. Now that's a lazy propagandist.
Nobody seemed to find that part of the story particularly interesting,
but hey, what's violating the first rule of journalism next to hotmilitarystuds.com?
A: Despite having been publicly exposed to be a clownish impostor
and an embarrassment to his party, Gannon refuses to go away, clinging
ever more tenaciously to the same self-denying dogma that made him
a laughingstock in the first place.
Reunited with reality, in the form of ass cancer.
Jennifer Wilbanks
Wasting the entire nation's time and attention without actually
being abducted and killed. The "Runaway Bride" fiasco
marks a new low point in modern news, an episode in which the media
devoted more attention to a single fruitcake than the rest of the
damned world, discovered her to be simply an inconsiderate flake,
and continued their shameless round-the-clock coverage of her unabated
for many days afterward, compulsively playing 10 seconds of towel-headed
perp walk footage over and over and over again, as world events
were left to take care of themselves. This bug-eyed bitch and her
doormat fiancée, after all, were important—right?
A: Even if she were actually abducted and killed, it wouldn't
have merited 1/1000th the coverage she got in the first
day of this speculation orgy.
Actually abducted and killed.
Jesse Jackson
Having parlayed a brief association with and willingness to
mimic Martin Luther King Jr. into a lifelong career, Jackson finally
cast aside all vestiges of integrity in 2005, diving headlong into
rhetorical prostitution appearances in support of three extremely
dubious "heroes": transparent pedophile Michael Jackson,
all-star wide receiver and raging asshole Terrell Owens, and convicted
quadruple-murderer Stanley "Tookie" Williams, who Jackson
compared to Nelson Mandela. Providing the post-black pop star with
racial cover for what must have been an exorbitant amount of money,
and arguing that Tookie's writing a children's book makes up for
mocking the death-rattles of his victims, Jackson managed to make
Al Sharpton look good last year. It's a long, soul-destroying trek
from "I have a dream" to "I have to get a receipt
for my expense account."
A: Jackson's Rainbow/PUSH coalition organized a five-bus caravan,
ostensibly to bring New Orleans residents wiped out by hurricane
Katrina back to the Big Easy for guaranteed jobs and housing. Only
fourteen of the two hundred passengers were actually from New Orleans.
Three quarters of the passengers went right back home. Forty-eight
were hired, three of which were from New Orleans.
Jackson awakes to discover that he really has 'had a dream,'
and that he is actually white, dirt poor, unemployed, and a terrible
Bill Frist
A physician whose senatorial career has been a protracted renunciation
of the Hippocractic oath. First and foremost, Frist does harm. Drew
the scrutiny of the SEC and Department of Justice for directing
the sale of $6 million worth of stock in his brother's company,
while claiming not to know he even owned it. Diagnosed Terri Schiavo
from the senate floor, proclaiming "that is not somebody in
a persistent vegetative state," and then denied ever having
made such a judgment. His Harvard Medical School classmates reproached
him in a letter for having exploited his medical training. Made
protecting drug maker Eli Lilly from litigation for putting mercury
in vaccines a provision of the Homeland Security bill. Honed his
surgical skills on cats he adopted from pet shelters—really.
A: Opposed Patients' Bill of Rights.
Brain damage due to botched botox treatment.
Oprah Winfrey
Winfrey's entire life is an exercise in self-aggrandizement,
from the TV show which tells us what to read and how to live to
her eponymous magazine, every issue of which features her smug countenance
on its cover. More than just another insufferable Hollywood egotist,
Oprah is something more akin to a housewife messiah, providing false
hope and faux spirituality for experience-deprived worshippers.
Everything she does is strategically designed to draw more praise,
more devotees, and of course more money. Recently had celebrated
poet Maya Angelou on her program to promote her new poem, which
Oprah read for the audience as if she wrote it herself, as she seems
to actually believe.
A: Dr. Phil.
Crushed by self-commissioned 40-story platinum Oprah statue.
James Sensenbrenner
Hates free speech. Sensenbrenner is every truculent moron
who ever shouted you down for informing him or called you a
traitor for disagreeing with him. Sensenbrenner wants to apply
criminal penalties for broadcast indecency—jail for swearing.
Sensenbrenner and his supporters don't know a damn thing about
freedom or democracy; they may not even understand that they
are clearly against these concepts. They are terrible, mindless,
trained by decades of churchgoing into an unquestioning loyalty
and a bitter resentment of dissent. That's why they didn't mind
when this turgid cock abruptly ended a hearing on the Patriot
Act after a single round of questioning because the witnesses
were talking about Guantanamo. Sensenbrenner gaveled the hearing
to a close over the objections of many, and when it became clear
that the Democrats weren't leaving, this old, worthless bag
of shit turned off the microphones and ordered CSPAN
to turn its cameras off, clearly enraged by the idea of liberals
getting a turn to talk. Specializes in legislative attacks on
civil liberties and the separation of powers, such as the Patriot
Act and 2005's REAL ID Act, which made its way into law as a
rider attached to a military spending bill, and allows the Homeland
Security Department to bypass any law or court to erect physical
barriers at our borders.
A: If Sensenbrenner ran the country, we'd go to jail for writing
Spine-mounted electrode racks Sensenbrenner's body with searing
pain every time he utters an article, pronoun, or any form of the
verbs "to have" and "to be."
Tommy Hilfiger
Egomaniacal designer of drab, ironically patriot-hued clothing,
manufactured by Chinese migrants who overcrowd the equally drab
Pacific Rim factories of the United States Commonwealth of Saipan,
favorite illegal vacation spot of Jack Abramoff and Tom Delay. Workers
slave for pennies, are administered forced abortions, and still
can slap a "Made in the USA" sticker on their products.
A: Publicly raising a spoiled cunt on MTV's post-apocalyptic
"Rich Girls," and hosting a primetime CBS reality infomercial
while peddling overpriced trash made by slaves.
Receives gift from Ralph Lauren—a Sicilian necktie.
William A. Donohue
If Jesus Christ were alive today, Catholic League president
Bill Donohue would regularly call him a faggot in casual conversation.
Purports to somehow defend Christianity by attacking nearly everybody
on the planet in a perpetual frenzy of hateful, red-faced rage.
As far as Donohue is concerned, the main focus of Catholicism is
to stamp out homosexuality and Hollywood Jews who "like anal
A: When a liberal blogger posted an "O'Reilly Factor"
parody transcript wherein Donohue launches a campaign against responding
to sneezes by saying "gesundheit" instead of "God
bless you," many failed to get the joke, because, well, it's
just plain realistic.
Actually judged by true Christian god.
R Kelly
As if videotaping himself urinating on an underage girl
wasn't bad enough, Kelly decided to follow up by inflicting
the worst piece of music in American history upon the public
consciousness. Kelly claims he is a genius for squeezing out
what are so far 12 installments of his "hip hopera," "Trapped
in the Closet," like so many virtually identical turds, with
no variation in musical content and a story line so patently
terrible that it soon became the subject of a parody-frenzy
involving Saturday Night Live, South Park, Mad TV, Jimmy Kimmel,
and the Upright Citizens brigade, among many others. Even his
good songs all seem to be about fucking underage girls.
A: Seriously—pissing on an underage girl.
Trapped in a closet. Eventually dies of thirst.
Karl Rove
A greasy pig whose only distinction in life is his total lack
of decency. Rove is decidedly not a genius; he is simply missing
the part of his soul that prevents the rest of us from kicking elderly
women in the face. His admirers have elevated fanatical, amoral
ambition to the status of a virtue, along with lying, cheating,
and negligent homicide, all in the name of "values." Quite
possibly the worst person in the worst White House in American history.
A: "As people do better, they start voting like Republicans
- unless they have too much education and vote Democratic, which
proves there can be too much of a good thing."
Lowered head first into oil refinery smokestack.
Elisabeth Bumiller
The ultimate Bush hagiographer, Bumiller is responsible for
unearthing such essential information as Bush's iPod playlist and
how he always makes his bed time. Bumiller's weekly presidential
throat job in the rapidly declining New York Times, the "White
House Letter," reads like transparent ad copy for the president.
Her unabashedly moist, worshipful tone would seem a little over-the-top
at an RNC convention. Bumiller revealed the secret of her success
to her alumni magazine at Northwestern: doing the very least that
her job description requires. "At every press conference I
stand up every time and ask a question," Bumiller said. "No
matter what." Wow.
A: "You can't say George Bush is wrong here. There's no
way you can say that in the New York Times…You can't just say the
president is lying. You don't just say that in the… You can't say
the president is lying—that's a judgment call… What is wrong with
that? What is your problem with that? What? Why do you all object
to that?"
The Times' reign as the "paper of record" is finally
brought to an end when the paper's headquarters are demolished by
readers upon publication of Bumiller's final dispatch, "Bush's
Taint: Sweet Like Honey."
If your answer to the age-old question of God's existence is
"yes," your next question should be, "Why is he such
a dick?" After three major natural disasters, not to mention
the eternal constants of famine, war and disease, to believe in
God is to believe either that He enjoys fucking with us, or at best
has totally lost interest in the whole "people" thing.
Never calls anymore.
A: Mosquitoes, Ralph Reed.
Forever listening to an unending stream of idiotic, mundane
prayers uttered by the dumbest, most inarticulate people in His
Barbara Bush
Her polluted womb nurtured the seed of American decadence. The
root of America's decay; the poison tree from whence the fruit loop
George W. Bush sprang. This unfeeling, unthinking patrician hag
spawned America's most notorious welfare child, whose every glaring
deficiency has been excused or underwritten by undeserved wealth.
Chuckling, she remarked of poor people displaced by Hurricane Katrina,
"And so many of the people in the arena here, you know, were
underprivileged anyway, so this is working very well for them."
Of their plans for permanent relocation, she speculated: "What
I'm hearing, which is sort of scary, is they all want to stay in
Texas." A true aristocrat, she sees poor people as another
A: George H.W., George W., Jeb, Neil, Jenna, Barbara, Noelle,
succeeding generations.
Hysterectomy on principle. Bound and thrown into Lake Pontchartrain.
If she floats, burned at the stake. If she drowns, even better.
Samuel Alito
The US Supreme Court's fait accompli. President Bush's closet
case follow-up to the "most qualified" Harriet Miers'
disastrous nomination, Alito was defended vociferously as a victim
of racism by conservatives for being labeled "Scalito,"
a nickname clearly signifying his kinship of judicial philosophy
with Supreme Court Justice Antonin Scalia, and nothing else. Writes
autistic opinions, in which language itself is rendered meaningless.
For example, he wrote in a decision that the government should not
protect plaintiffs from "employers who, although they have
not acted with the intent to discriminate, may have treated their
employees unfairly." When Alito puts on his Supreme Court robe,
America can say "Arrivederci" to a woman's right to choose.
A: In a landmark case, Alito distinguished himself by advocating
the most extreme interpretation of law on the conservative Third
Circuit; the decision prompted one observer to note, "[F]or
the first time since 1973, a Federal court of appeals has directly
said that Roe v. Wade is no longer the law of the land."
Paper cut while handling the Constitution, left untreated, becomes
infected, eventually killing him. Wife cries.
Bill O'Reilly
Even Limbaugh must bow before O'Reilly's unparalleled bullying
skills and ability to deliver undiluted bullshit with an air of
brusque authority. O'Reilly is so comfortable with his astounding
hypocrisy that he didn't skip a beat when he was publicly revealed
to be a comically perverse sexual harasser, continuing to sanctimoniously
moralize about the corrosive effects of rap music and intellectualism
on American society. Main tactic against his critics, whose jobs
rank among the easiest in the world, is to accuse them of his own
methods: arbitrary smears, selective quotation, partisan motivation,
and intellectual cowardice. Infuriatingly claims to be a political
"independent" who just happens to parrot virtually every
Republican talking point and equate mainstream liberals with Nazis
and Stalinists. Claimed his call for abandoning San Francisco to
al Qaeda bombing was "satirical," which is itself the
funniest thing he's ever said. An honest to goodness list-making
Joe McCarthy wannabe, with the ACLU standing in for the Communist
A: O'Reilly's novel, Those Who Trespass, which
reads like an eighth grade writing assignment, is about a blustery
news correspondent, demoted from foreign correspondence to less
prestigious work (as O'Reilly was when he moved from ABC News
to Inside Edition), who murders a string of colleagues he feels
have hindered his career. "I kill you on page six,"
he told Charlie Gibson on Good Morning America.
After O'Reilly's influence fundamentally changes the nature
of jurisprudence, he is tortured and jailed for life when it is
discovered that he once leafed through a copy of the Communist Manifesto
as a teen.
BTK Killer
It's not so much the depraved sexual murder or sociopathic lack
of remorse—if we started including every homicidal freak in this
list, there'd be no room to display our prodigious political bias.
It's the fact that Dennis Rader turned out to be, in the end, a
sad, needy wuss. His jaw-dropping statement at his sentencing, coming
after a series of tearful, enraged victims' statements, revealed
the extent of Rader's detachment from reality—doling out thank-yous
to his lawyers, the cops, his prison guards and the gang back at
lock-up, like he just won an Oscar, cracking inside jokes and pretending
to be 'close' with people who doubtless wished they could beat him
dead with his own severed arms.
A: "I feel like a star right now."
Bound. Tortured. Killed.
Judith Miller
The human warhead Ahmed Chalabi fired into America's collective
ass on behalf of the federal government. A dutiful stenographer,
Miller regurgitated all of Chalabi's erroneous assertions about
Iraq's weapon's capabilities without skepticism and threw in a few
of her own. Essentially started a war with bad reporting, and remained
indefatigably self-satisfied throughout the ensuing imbroglio, her
mantis-like face fixed in a smile behind oddly insectival sunglasses.
Managed to cast herself as a martyr for journalistic principles,
despite her role as a conduit for a successful White House propaganda
campaign, which is exactly why they'd try to use her to leak a CIA
agent's identity—to break the law again.
A: Told a Salon interviewer in May, 2004, while US troops were
already dying, "You know what, I was proved fucking right.
That's what happened. People who disagreed with me were saying,
'There she goes again.' But I was proved fucking right," which
shows that not only doesn't Miller really report for the Times,
but she also doesn't read it.
After a brief but horrible stint as a chemical weapons test
subject for Monsanto, Miller is vivisected without anesthesia and
her organs are harvested alive to be preserved as spares for Seymour
Thomas Friedman
The worst of all creatures in the political opinion jungle:
a cretin who thinks he's a genius. Friedman's intolerable knack
for converting irreducibly complex geopolitical/socioeconomic situations
into simplistic, tin-eared insta-clichés makes him one of the most
dangerous people on the planet, arming people even stupider than
him with the illusion of knowledge in the form of a crude vocabulary
of badly mixed metaphors and ill-conceived flashcard images, thereby
having a negative net effect on the nation's intellect. India and
China are "like a bottle of champagne" which someone has
been "shaking for 40 years;" the modern economy dictates
that "you need to be at a certain level to be able to claim
your share of a global pie that is both expanding and becoming more
complex;" and the threat of terrorism is a "bubble"
that threatens to "undermine" open society. Friedman's
disorienting literary ineptitude is nearly enough to distract us
from the indisputable fact that he has no fucking idea what he's
talking about. For this dolt-friendly parlor trick and a slavish
devotion to globalization and technology as abstract, almost mystical
tenets, Friedman has achieved iconic status. Exhibits the easy smile
and benevolent smugness of an unjustly celebrated man who has never
thought very deeply or rigorously about anything at all.
A: Despite his constant exaltation of the internet as some kind
of global cure-all, Friedman had to actually fly to London
to discover that European newspapers were having misgivings about
Guantanamo Bay.
Column outsourced to Bangalore, where there is some difficulty
in finding a peasant ignorant and ineloquent enough to please his
audience. Compelled at gunpoint to write a 500-page retraction of
his recent best-seller, called No, Actually the World is Round.
Michael Jackson
Jackson's second escape from accountability for a well-known
lust for little boys was disappointing, but at least his image is
forever ruined, causing him to flee the country. Unfortunately,
his own imperiled children have not been taken from him. First plan
upon acquittal was to build another amusement park, this
time in Africa, where apparently it must be easier to buy off parents
and/or potential prosecutors. Currently in Bahrain, where he is
negotiating a consultant job with a company to help set up—yup—theme
parks. Like a spider whose web has been destroyed, Jackson simply
relocates and spins a new one. On top of all of this, he hasn't
recorded a decent track since Thriller's success drove him
off the deep end, and has retroactively ruined such now-creepy titles
as "PYT (Pretty Young Thing)" and "The Way You Make
Me Feel."
A: Truly living in a fantasy world of his own creation, Jackson
insists with a (figuratively) straight face that he has only had
a nose job. Remember when Prince was weird?
Forced to actually relive his childhood, including all of the
beatings and molestation which transformed him into the inhuman
freak he is today.
Tom Delay
A politician so horrible, his prior career as an exterminator
constitutes fratricide. Smiled for his mug shot like it was a campaign
poster. Asked three young Katrina evacuees, "Now tell me the truth,
boys, is this kind of fun?" One of an elite handful of white Americans
still engaged in the time-honored tradition of screwing over Indians.
Responding to a request he extinguish his cigar in a restaurant
in accordance with federal regulations, Delay replied, "I AM the
federal government." Claimed that there was "no fat left to cut"
from the federal budget to offset New Orleans reconstruction costs.
So arrogant in abuse of power that he doesn't even take time to
construct plausible lies.
A: Explaining his failure to enlist during Vietnam: "So
many minority youths had volunteered…that there was literally no
room for patriotic folks like myself."
Bashed to death with hammer.
Silently enabling and contributing to the irreversible destruction
of your planet. Absolving yourself of your responsibility to do
anything about it that your immediate neighbors don't. Assuming
that it's normal behavior to spend several hours each day totally
inert and staring into a cathode ray tube. Substituting antidepressants
for physical motion. Caring more about the personal relationships
of people you will never meet than your own. Shrugging your shoulders
at the knowledge that your government is populated by criminal liars
intent on fooling you into impoverished, helpless submission. Cheering
this process on.
A: You don't even know who your congressman is.
Deathbed realization that your entire life was an unending series
of stupid mistakes and wasted opportunities, a priceless gift of
potential extravagantly squandered, for which you deserve nothing
but scorn or, at best, indifference, and a cold, meaningless demise.
George W. Bush
Simply put, the stupidest man ever to lead this country. Bush's
lobotomized Will Rogers routine is a satirist's dream, a European
intellectual's caricature of the dipshit cowboy American, all balls
and no brains. Often responds to questions by attempting to define
the word he finds the most challenging in them. Thinks press reports
of his various crimes are responsible for his waning popularity,
rather than the deeds themselves. Interprets the constitution like
a Unitarian interprets the bible; for maximum convenience and with
no regard to the actual text. Foreign policy vision is less serious
and more simplistic than an issue of Captain America.
A: "I want to thank the President and the CEO of Constellation
Energy, Mayo Shattuck. That's a pretty cool first name, isn't it?
Mayo. Pass the Mayo."
Trapped for eternity under shoddily manufactured Diebold voting
machine, unable to reach nearby refrigerator full of hot dogs and
Dick Cheney
At the forefront of nearly every administration effort to
annihilate the constitution. A true psychopath with only one
motivating force; insatiable greed. Insists that we can only
remain "free" through torture, spying and secrecy.
Bears the crooked ugliness of a man whose entire life has been
devoted to a senseless pursuit of power, and whose most effective
weapon is a total lack of ethics, or even decorum. So cartoonishly
evil he defies parody.
A: "I think they're in the last throes, if you will, of
the insurgency."
Strapped to chair; eyes removed with melon baller. Nursed back
to health. Lips sewn to a rubber hose connecting him to a 500 gallon
nutrition shake. Nursed back to health. Fingers, hands, toes, feet,
nose and genitals devoured by hungry pigs. Nursed back to health.
Legs and arms ground to stubs with belt sander. Nursed back to health.
Fitted with earphones that play only Christina Aguilera songs, and
left alone to think about what he has done.
Pat Robertson
If Pat Robertson's local Starbucks caught fire, he would claim
that God was punishing them for giving him a caramel latte when
he ordered vanilla. Robertson has always been a demonic charlatan
with the credibility of Miss Cleo and a lust for Armageddon in his
vile, rat-toad heart, but this was really his year to shine. In
2005, Robertson called on God to vacate seats in the Supreme Court
(the almighty obliged, killing Rehnquist), advocated assassinating
Hugo Chavez, said 'judicial activists' were a more serious threat
to America than terrorists, called criticism of the war treason,
said John Roberts should be thankful for Hurricane Katrina, which
he implied was "connected" to Roe v. Wade, attributed Ariel Sharon's
stroke to divine retribution for the Gaza pullout, said "the Antichrist
is probably a Jew alive in Israel today," and implied that God would
wipe the residents of Dover, PA off the map for rejecting Creationism.
Not to mention raising huge sums of cash from his zombie army, much
of which is diverted from his charity operations to his business
interests, including African diamond mines. Has long advocated that
America simply ignore the Supreme Court. Robertson's God is an insecure,
misogynistic, homicidal fanatic—just like Pat.
A: Vehemently opposed to voluntary abortion in America,
but okay with forced abortion in China, where his cable investments
depend on the good graces of the government.
Repeatedly struck by lightning.
Allan Uthman, Paul Jones, Ian Murphy, Chris Riordan
Editor: Allan Uthman
Illustrations: Ian Murphy
by Matt Bors
Fat Whale by Brian McFadden
Bible Fellowship by Nicholas
Bob the Angry
Flower by Stephen Notely
Fried by Jason Yungbluth


text:
Posted on 7/5/2012
Rob Norwood
The response to our Call to Artists was phenomenal, with 30 artists from the community bringing in their work. The artwork includes paintings, drawings, photography, and collage, done by artists of all ages. Please come and enjoy the variety of work presented by these artists. The exhibit is in the Central Library Auditorium.
There will be a Closing Reception for the exhibit on July 30, from 7 til 8:30 in the Auditorium where you will be able to meet and mingle with the artists. Refreshments will be served.
At the reception we will also have on hand the Library's unique Leave Your Mark journals. The Leave Your Mark journals are blank artist's journals that patrons can check out and take home, add their thoughts and images, and then return for the next artist's contribution.
660 West Fifth Street
Winston-Salem, NC 27101
Closed for renovations.
Hours for All Locations
Holiday Closings
Copyright © 2016 Forsyth County | Contact the Webmaster | Site Map

subset: commoncrawl


text:
Chocolate Mint Layer Cake RecipeRead Reviews Be the first to add a review
More Chocolate Icing Recipes »
- 1/2 cup butter, softened
- 1-3/4 cups sugar
- 3 eggs
- 4 ounces unsweetened chocolate, melted and cooled
- 1 teaspoon vanilla extract
- 1-3/4 cups all-purpose flour
- 3/4 teaspoon baking soda
- 1/2 teaspoon salt
- 3/4 cup 2% milk
- 1/2 cup water
- 1 cup heavy whipping cream
- 3 tablespoons confectioners' sugar
- 1/8 teaspoon peppermint extract
- 3 to 4 drops green food coloring, optional
- 1 cup (6 ounces) semisweet chocolate chips
- 1/4 cup butter, cubed
- 1/3 cup evaporated milk
- 1 teaspoon vanilla extract
- 1-1/2 cups confectioners' sugar
- Line two greased 9-in. round baking pans with waxed paper. Grease and flour the paper; set aside.
- In a large bowl, cream the butter and sugar until light and fluffy. Add eggs, one at a time, beating well after each addition. Beat in chocolate and vanilla. Combine the flour, baking soda and salt; add to creamed mixture alternately with milk and water, beating well after each addition.
- Pour into prepared pans. Bake at 350° for 24-28 minutes or until a toothpick inserted near the center comes out clean. Cool for 10 minutes before removing from pans to wire racks.
- For filling, in a small bowl, beat the cream until it begins to thicken. Add confectioners' sugar and extract; beat until stiff peaks form. Beat in food coloring if desired. Place one cake layer on a serving plate; spread with filling. Top with second layer.
- For icing, in a microwave, melt chips and butter; stir until smooth. Cool slightly. Beat in evaporated milk and vanilla. Gradually beat in confectioners' sugar until smooth. Frost and decorate cake. Chill 2 hours before slicing. Yield: 12 servings.
Reviews for Chocolate Mint Layer Cake
"Really bad recipe didn't rise at all and is extremely small and breakable - don't even want to eat it"
"4 stars based upon mint filling - very good :) (used optional ingredient of 4 drops green food coloring - kids said it made cake look like giant Mint Oreo Cookie) - ButterflyJ76's suggestion of melting Andes Thin Mints into filling to make mousse filling sounds really good - may try that next time :)Chocolate cake OK, just not as moist as I would have liked it to be - would use cake flour, store bought or different recipe next time (too time and effort to put into finished product that does not dazzle taste buds) - also suggestions by other posters may help: using 8" pans instead of 9" pans for thicker cake layers (Eudocia) and/or soaking in Peppermint Schnapps Simple Syrup (blinnell) (would have tried that myself 1st time around if recipe was shared - hope Poster reposts with "Simple Syrup" recipe because it sounds yummy!)Frosting looked nothing like rich color in pic - much lighter brown - next time would use different recipe or store bought - don't like taste of semi-sweet chocolate used in frosting***Only minor unintentional changes made to recipe:1.) Used whole milk from local dairy farm (not 2%) for cake because that's what we have in fridge :)2.) Doubled Mint Filling - this was accidental - son tripped over beater cord sending bowl flying - only small amount spilled but, just to be sure to have enough, made 2nd batch combining both (In my opinion, it was "lucky mistake" - Mint Filling would be way too thin using one batch) :)To be fair, it's important to post any changes made to recipes - both changes were unintentional but important to mention - doubling Mint Filling enhanced flavor but switching out Whole for 2% Milk may well have changed finished product as far as cake - perhaps using 2% Milk would have yielded moister cake?? I can't be sure..."
"The cake recipe is so moist and just dense enough to be good. It's the only chocolate cake recipe I make without a mix. The frosting and filling are perfect together. This recipe always gets compliments."
"Made this cake but did a mocha filling instead of mint as we are not fans of mint. I used the filling recipe from the "Chocolate Yule Log" recipe:MOCHA CREAM FILLING:1 cup heavy whipping cream1/2 cup confectioners' sugar1-1/2 teaspoons instant coffee granulesTo reduce the richness of the icing, I just put the filling in between the layers and spread some over the top (left the sides un-iced). I made only half the icing and used it to make a nice edge on the top and bottom of the cake - not a big fan of this icing - next time will just do a regular chocolate icing. However, the cake turned out fabulous, and not too sweet. In fact, it tasted even better later."
"it wasnt at all chocolately.. idont know if i did something wrong or what but i followed the directions as shown and it wasnt good at all."


text:
The DWMS Blog Spot-
This is a reminder for my 8th grade students that there are two blog responses for Chapter 3.
Both Chapter 3 responses are Due Wednesday 9/14/09!
The computer you are commenting from has an id number. It is 126.96.36.199!
My Classes & Students
About the Blogger
My name is Mrs. Gatz and this is my second year teaching 3-8 Computers at Doniphan West Schools. I'm very excited about he upcoming year. Previously I have taught 5th & 6th grade and middle school math and science. On a personal note I have 3 children. I enjoy sports, reading and of course spending time with my children!
Welcome to 7 Random...


text:
Talk:Fourth Shinobi World War
Back to page
this wiki
Why does it say that "the five kage" didn't give Madara the remaining beasts. The hokage (both real and acting) was not present. 220.127.116.11 (talk) 14:32, March 24, 2010 (UTC)
It was later relayed to the Hidden Leaf anyways, and they agreed...so i guess it doesn't matter much, add it if you like.--Silverblade1 (talk) 15:57, March 24, 2010 (UTC)
Tailed Beasts imortal?
Go to talk: Tailed Beasts. Thomas Finlayson (talk) 20:58, June 11, 2010 (UTC)
Eventually we're going to need the Battles on individual pages
From what it looks like, this is going to be a long war and we can't keep all the battles in one page. Should we also start working on a timeline too?--SuperSaiyaMan (talk) 05:21, November 5, 2010 (UTC)
- None of these entries are or are likely to be long enough to absolutely need separate articles. I'd also argue that Bee v Kisame and Danzo v Sasuke aren't really events of this war, as one or more of the involved parties in each battle were not aware that war had been declared.
- Also, the basic structure of this article is very different from all similar articles on the wiki. That's partly because this war isn't being reduced to the occasional flashback, so that's fine. But the running tally of participants and wins/loses I see as problematic. ~SnapperTo 17:47, November 5, 2010 (UTC)
How do you know?
How do you know that there are 80,000 shinobi and samurai? There is obviously more than 80,000 ninja in the narutoverse! Probrably more than 80,000 ninjas in a village!Don't look at me!! Just talk... 15:15, November 26, 2010 (UTC)
- We know it because that's how much Zetsu read there was in the info Kisame stole from the alliance. Omnibender - Talk - Contributions 15:34, November 26, 2010 (UTC)
- We need to start including more references. --Daleadil (talk) 18:09, November 26, 2010 (UTC)
- Besides, even if there were more that 80,000 shinobi in a village, do you not see the problem with a shinobi village deploying ALL of its troops? Think about Suna, for instance, and how vulnerable it would be to a neutral village like Kusa? It makes sense that there are more than that, but does it not also make sense not to deploy all of them? Timeel39 (talk) 00:19, January 22, 2011 (UTC)
Other kage
Where are the other kage? Since the kages are the most powerfull ninjas in the world i would think that they would be in charge of the division. Where is Onoki, Mei, Tsunade?Scott sswagg 16:27, November 26, 2010 (UTC)
- Being busy with other aspects of the war like supplies, home front defence, logistics, and medical backup? —ShounenSuki (talk | contribs | translations) 16:46, November 26, 2010 (UTC)
add the battle
shouldnt we add the battle that is going on between kakashis division and the as icall it the kekkei division.Scott sswag (talk) 05:59, December 20, 2010 (UTC)
i agree,its one of the on going battles( i think their are liek 4 now)and we have plenty of information about it.220.127.116.11 (talk) 07:11, March 20, 2011 (UTC)
- It's there They just aren't called the "Kekkei division" --Cerez☺ (talk) 11:50, March 20, 2011 (UTC)
Allied Forces' Ambush
In all maps seem so far, the Surprise Attack Division is shown to be in the Land of Hot Water, and Kakashi's Division is in the Land of Frost. The battle between the SAD and Akatsuki's SADP, from what we know from SAD's location, happened in the Land of Hot Water. I understood that the Third Division moved into the Land of Hot Water to help them once Zabuza, Haku, Gari, and Pakura moved in, but the map shows them in the Land of Frost. I don't think SAD moved back, they'd have to go forward to reach Mountains' Graveyard. It seems to me that the Allied Shinobi have updated their maps according to this development, and that we haven't seen any communication between the SAD and someone who isn't from the Third Division seems to support that. Thoughts? Omnibender - Talk - Contributions 10:44, February 4, 2011 (UTC)
I noticed this page mentions Sasori returning to the "Afterlife". As an afterlife ia no small matter, someone thinking it exists in the plotline might not be seeing the series setting quite as Misashi Kishimoto intended. I tend to speedread comics, so if anyone remembers any mention of the afterlife, it should be discussed in the talk page here. Michael Flores (talk) 01:55, March 11, 2011 (UTC)
- Things like heaven were mentioned by Zabuza before Kabuto wiped his personality, and Kabuto mentioned that for him to be able to bring someone back, the soul needs to be in the pure world. I'm not familiar with the religious and cultural aspects of the term, but it implies it's something like an afterlife. We wouldn't add it to articles if we didn't have a base for it. Omnibender - Talk - Contributions 02:19, March 11, 2011 (UTC)
- The Pure World or Pure Land is a kind of afterlife. It's a place created by the Amida Buddha where those born into it are personally instructed by her and numerous bodhisattva in the way to reach Nirvana and escape Samsara. Basically, it's a one-way trip to Nirvana and all you have to do is revere the Amida Buddha in life and/or call out to her when you die. —ShounenSuki (talk | contribs | translations) 13:08, March 11, 2011 (UTC)
OK. I tend to speed-read through comics. Michael Flores (talk) 00:34, March 12, 2011 (UTC)
Shikaku Nara's Promotion.
In the recent issue, the Raikage gave Shikaku Nara (Shikamaru's dad) the power to COMMAND the allied shinobi forces. You can find this conversation on page 7 of Manga #537. Does this not count as a promotion? We should list that as part of his rank, "Proxy Commander of Allied Shinobi Forces." Or something to that affect. Thoughts? --Daleadil (talk) 20:55, May 7, 2011 (UTC)
- Yes we know this. It's already mentioned in his article and seeing as he's the Chief Strategist all he's doing is usurping a line of command. I don't think that we should make it an "official" thing, not that it isn't.--Cerez365™☺ 21:00, May 7, 2011 (UTC)
Can this war been seen in the anime?
I just want to know, can i see this on anime?—This unsigned comment was made by AntonPrivalov (talk • contribs) .
- Madara declared war in episode 205 (current episode is 212), and since the battle against Danzo wasn't a part of the war, the short answer is: no, not yet. Jacce | Talk | Contributions 15:43, May 20, 2011 (UTC)
Minor Nations
What are the minor nations doing during this war? Do they know what's going on and are they sending help and supplies or are they just sitting back minding their own business? Nadara (talk) 19:12, November 26, 2011 (UTC)
To answer your question I think the smaller nations are aware but choose not to participate because of their small numbers of people and supplies but from the couple of places naruto has visited while sailing to the island in the land of lightning it seems some of nations send food and medical supplies to the main villages. WillofOP (talk) 19:20, November 26, 2011 (UTC)WillofOP
- They evacuated to the greater nations. The war was waged between Tobi and the Five Great Shinobi Countries. They're not really a part of it.-Cerez365™ 19:24, November 26, 2011 (UTC)
So the smaller shinobi villages are pretty much sitting back and hoping the Five Great Shinobi Countries win this. Nadara (talk) 19:55, November 26, 2011 (UTC)
- When asked who the Allied Forces of WWII were, most people would list the US, Britain, Australia, Canada, China, and maybe New Zealand, South Africa, and the Commonwealth nations. This doesn't mean the Netherlands, Belgium, Greece, Czechoslovakia, Mexico, Norway, Yugoslavia, and dozens of other smaller nations didn't fight on the Allies' side as well.
- Just because the Alliance is lead by the Five Great Shinobi Power and mostly consists of their shinobi, doesn't mean the smaller nations don't have their roles as well. We simply don't focus on them. —ShounenSuki (talk | contribs | translations) 01:08, November 27, 2011 (UTC)
Village icons instead names
In "Allied Shinobi Forces" section table, the village names its said instead of their icons, like:
The second way would be best, not? SKnight • Talk • Contribs 22:15, January 21, 2012 (UTC)
Like that:
|Supreme Leader of the Allied Shinobi Forces
|Regimental Commander of the Allied Shinobi Forces, 4th Division Commander
|1st Division Commander
|2nd Division Commander
|Kakashi Hatake
|3rd Division Commander
|Shikamaru Nara
|4th Division Proxy Commander
|5th Division Commander
|Logistical Support and Medical Division Captain
|Surprise Attack Division Captain
|Sensor Division Captain
|Inoichi Yamanaka
|Intelligence Division Captain
|Shikaku Nara
|Chief Strategist
Cool ^-^ SKnight • Talk • Contribs 22:26, January 21, 2012 (UTC)
That seems good to me. There's no drawbacks to it that I can think of. :-) Skitts (talk) 22:27, January 21, 2012 (UTC)
I don't have a problem with this. Two things though... I think if we add "!! Loyalty" you can get another heading just for that. You may also want to ask Simant if there's an easier/automatic way to get the icons to show up in the table.--Cerez365™ 13:50, January 22, 2012 (UTC)
Naruto and the 4th World War
I may be a bit late but I have a question. In the most recent anime filler Adventures at Sea Arc, it appears that Naruto knows about the war. In the manga he has no realization about the war until Chapter 535. Is this a massive plot-hole or a misunderstanding on my part? --Questionaredude (talk) 01:50, February 17, 2012 (UTC)
- Most likely a plot-hole in my opinion, though if there are no events in that arc contradicting it, I think it might be possible for Naruto to have known that there would be a war, but not expect it to break so soon. Still most likely a plot-hole. Omnibender - Talk - Contributions 02:09, February 17, 2012 (UTC)
Epic and Glorious Cuts
Yeah. The last battle was like a month of chapters but it grew to epic proportions here. So I made it smaller. Much smaller. I feel the other places should be shorted as well.--TheUltimate3 ~Keeper of Lore~ 14:56, February 18, 2012 (UTC)
- Those cuts are necessary once in a while. Snapper usually makes them. Omnibender - Talk - Contributions 16:00, February 18, 2012 (UTC)
Shikaku Nara
Where has it been stated in the manga that Shikaku is the chief strategist? --18.104.22.168 (talk) 01:07, February 28, 2012 (UTC)
- If it wasn't stated implicitly, it was implied in chapter 525.--Cerez365™ 01:21, February 28, 2012 (UTC)
Anime Only
Given I think the anime is going to drag these out here and there, is it worth while to note Anime Only Battles like Team 8 vs. the White Zetsu in the mines and such?—This unsigned comment was made by Hawkeye2701 (talk • contribs) .
- Yes. If it happens in either the anime or manga, put it in. If you feel like you must, but an anime only tag in the duration but add it.--TheUltimate3 (talk) 10:52, October 4, 2012 (UTC)


text:
The Power of Independent Thinking
Living With a Nuclear Iran and North Korea?
Recorded: Thursday, June 21, 2007
Part 1 |
Part 2
Part 3
Part 4
Part 5
What if North Korea and Iran become nuclear states? If the United States must live with a nuclear Iran and North Korea, what policies should it adopt? Furthermore, could the U.S. change its foreign policy to reduce the risk of nuclear proliferation to even more countries?
Experts: Doug Bandow, Ivan Eland, Trita Parsi, Charles V. PeñaType: Independent Institute EventIssues: Defense and Foreign Policy
Eminent Domain: Abuse of Government Power?
Recorded: Tuesday, January 31, 2006
In June 2005, the U.S. Supreme Court ruled in Kelo v. New London that local governments may force property owners to sell out and to make way for private economic development, even if the property is not blighted. In response, many states have passed legislation and proposed amendments to their state constitutions to block this unprecedented government assault on the rights of property owners.
Experts: Steven Greenhut, Timothy SandefurType: Independent Institute EventIssues: Housing, Land Use, Property Rights


text:
22 U.S. Code § 6208 - Radio Free Asia
prev | next
(a) Authority
(1) Grants authorized under section 6204 of this title shall be available to make annual grants for the purpose of carrying out radio broadcasting to the following countries: The People's Republic of China, Burma, Cambodia, Laos, North Korea, Tibet, and Vietnam.
(b) Functions
Radio Free Asia shall—
(1) provide accurate and timely information, news, and commentary about events in the respective countries of Asia and elsewhere; and
(c) Grant agreement
Any grant agreement or grants under this section shall be subject to the following limitations and restrictions:
(1) The Board may not make any grant to Radio Free Asia unless the headquarters of Radio Free Asia and its senior administrative and managerial staff are in a location which ensures economy, operational effectiveness, and accountability to the Board.
(2) Any grant agreement under this section shall require that any contract entered into by Radio Free Asia shall specify that all obligations are assumed by Radio Free Asia and not by the United States Government.
(3) Any grant agreement shall require that any lease agreements entered into by Radio Free Asia shall be, to the maximum extent possible, assignable to the United States Government.
(4) Grants made for the operating costs of Radio Free Asia may not exceed $30,000,000 in each of the fiscal years 2000 and 2001.
(5) Grants awarded under this section shall be made pursuant to a grant agreement which requires that grant funds be used only for activities consistent with this section, and that failure to comply with such requirements shall permit the grant to be terminated without fiscal obligation to the United States.
(d) Limitations on administrative and managerial costs
It is the sense of the Congress that administrative and managerial costs for operation of Radio Free Asia should be kept to a minimum and, to the maximum extent feasible, should not exceed the costs that would have been incurred if Radio Free Asia had been operated as a Federal entity rather than as a grantee.
(e) Assessment of effectiveness of Radio Free Asia
Not later than 3 years after the date on which initial funding is provided for the purpose of operating Radio Free Asia, the Board shall submit to the appropriate congressional committees a report on—
(2) whether Radio Free Asia consistently meets the standards for quality and objectivity established by this chapter,
(4) the extent to which such broadcasting is already being received by the target audience from other credible sources; and
(f) Notification and consultation regarding displacement of Voice of America broadcasting
(1) Notification
The Board shall notify the appropriate congressional committees before—
(A) entering into any agreements for the utilization of Voice of America transmitters, equipment, or other resources that will significantly reduce the broadcasting activities of the Voice of America in Asia or any other region in order to accommodate the broadcasting activities of Radio Free Asia; or
Source(Pub. L. 103–236, title III, § 309,Apr. 30, 1994, 108 Stat. 439; Pub. L. 103–415, § 1(s)(2),Oct. 25, 1994, 108 Stat. 4302; Pub. L. 106–113, div. B, § 1000(a)(7) [div. A, title V, § 501], Nov. 29, 1999, 113 Stat. 1536, 1501A–450; Pub. L. 110–321, § 4,Sept. 19, 2008, 122 Stat. 3535; Pub. L. 111–71, § 1,Oct. 9, 2009, 123 Stat. 2058; Pub. L. 111–202, § 3,July 13, 2010, 124 Stat. 1374.)
References in Text
This chapter, referred to in subsecs. (e)(2) and (g), was in the original "this title", meaning title III of Pub. L. 103–236, Apr. 30, 1994, 108 Stat. 432, known as the United States International Broadcasting Act of 1994, which is classified principally to this chapter. For complete classification of title III to the Code, see Short Title note set out under section 6201 of this title and Tables.
2010—Subsec. (c)(2). Pub. L. 111–202, § 3(1), struck out ", and shall further specify that funds to carry out the activities of Radio Free Asia may not be available after September 30, 2010" after "Government".
Subsecs. (f) to (h). Pub. L. 111–202, § 3(2)–(4), redesignated subsecs. (g) and (h) as (f) and (g), respectively, designated first sentence of subsec. (f) as par. (1), inserted heading, inserted subpar. (A) designation before "entering into any agreements for the utilization of Voice of America", added subpar. (B), designated second sentence of subsec. (f) as par. (2), inserted heading, inserted "or Radio Free Asia broadcasting activities" before period at end, and struck out former subsec. (f) which related to sunset provisions.
2009—Subsec. (f). Pub. L. 111–71substituted "2010" for "2009".
2008—Subsec. (c)(2). Pub. L. 110–321substituted "2010" for "2009".
1999—Subsec. (c). Pub. L. 106–113, § 1000(a)(7) [div. A, title V, § 501(1), (2)], redesignated subsec. (d) as (c) and struck out heading and text of former subsec. (c), which required the Board, through the Director of the United States Information Agency, to submit to Congress a detailed plan for the establishment and operation of Radio Free Asia prior to the awarding of a grant to carry out this section.
Subsec. (c)(1). Pub. L. 106–113, § 1000(a)(7) [div. A, title V, § 501(3)(A)], struck out "(A)" after "(1)" and struck out subpar. (B) which read as follows: "Not later than 90 days after confirmation of all members of the Board, the Board shall provide a report to Congress on the number of administrative, managerial, and technical staff of Radio Free Asia who will be located within the metropolitan area of Washington, D.C., and the number of employees whose principal place of business will be located outside the metropolitan area of Washington, D.C."
Subsec. (c)(2). Pub. L. 106–113, § 1000(a)(7) [div. A, title V, § 501(3)(B)], substituted "September 30, 2009" for "September 30, 1999".
Subsec. (c)(4). Pub. L. 106–113, § 1000(a)(7) [div. A, title V, § 501(3)(C)], substituted "$30,000,000 in each of the fiscal years 2000 and 2001" for "$22,000,000 in any fiscal year".
Subsec. (c)(5), (6). Pub. L. 106–113, § 1000(a)(7) [div. A, title V, § 501(3)(D), (E)], redesignated par. (6) as (5) and struck out former par. (5) which read as follows: "The total amount of grant funds made available for one-time capital costs of Radio Free Asia may not exceed $8,000,000."
Subsecs. (d), (e). Pub. L. 106–113, § 1000(a)(7) [div. A, title V, § 501(2)], redesignated subsecs. (e) and (f) as (d) and (e), respectively. Former subsec. (d) redesignated (c).
Subsec. (f). Pub. L. 106–113, § 1000(a)(7) [div. A, title V, § 501(4)], reenacted subsec. heading without change and amended text generally. Prior to amendment, text read as follows: "The Board may not make any grant for the purpose of operating Radio Free Asia after September 30, 1998, unless the President of the United States determines in the President's fiscal year 1999 budget submission that continuation of funding for Radio Free Asia for 1 additional year is in the interest of the United States."
Pub. L. 106–113, § 1000(a)(7) [div. A, title V, § 501(2)], redesignated subsec. (g) as (f). Former subsec. (f) redesignated (e).
Subsecs. (g) to (i). Pub. L. 106–113, § 1000(a)(7) [div. A, title V, § 501(2)], redesignated subsecs. (h) and (i) as (g) and (h), respectively. Former subsec. (g) redesignated (f).
1994—Subsec. (d)(1)(B). Pub. L. 103–415inserted "of all members" after "confirmation".
Pub. L. 111–202, § 1,July 13, 2010, 124 Stat. 1373, provided that: "Congress finds the following:
"(1) Radio Free Asia (referred to in this Act [amending this section] as 'RFA')—
"(A) was authorized under section 309 of the United States International Broadcasting Act of 1994 (22 U.S.C. 6208);
"(B) was incorporated as a private, non-profit corporation in March 1996 in the hope that its operations would soon be obviated by the global advancement of democracy; and
"(C) is headquartered in Washington, DC, with additional offices in Bangkok, Hong Kong, Phnom Penh, Seoul, Ankara, and Taipei.
"(2) RFA broadcasts serve as substitutes for indigenous free media in regions lacking free media outlets.
"(3) The mission of RFA is 'to provide accurate and timely news and information to Asian countries whose governments prohibit access to a free press' in order to enable informed decisionmaking by the people within Asia.
"(4) RFA provides daily broadcasts of news, commentary, analysis, and cultural programming to Asian countries in several languages, including—
"(A) 12 hours per day in Mandarin;
"(B) 8 hours per day in 3 Tibetan dialects, Uke, Kham, and Amdo;
"(C) 4 hours per day in Korean and Burmese;
"(D) 2 hours per day in Cantonese, Vietnamese, Laotian, Khmer (Cambodian), and Uyghur; and
"(E) 11/2 hours per week in Wu (local Shanghai dialect).
"(5) The governments of the countries targeted for these broadcasts have consistently denied and blocked attempts at Medium Wave and FM transmissions into their countries, forcing RFA to rely on Shortwave broadcasts and the Internet.
"(6) RFA has provided continuous online news to its Asian audiences since 2004, although some countries—
"(A) routinely and aggressively block RFA's website;
"(B) monitor access to RFA's website; and
"(C) discourage online users by making it illegal to access RFA's website.
"(7) Despite these attempts, RFA has successfully managed to reach its online audiences through proxies, cutting-edge software, and active republication and repostings by its audience.
"(8) RFA also provides forums for local opinions and experiences through message boards, podcasts, web logs (blogs), cell phone-distributed newscasts, and new media, including Facebook, Flickr, Twitter, and YouTube.
"(9) Freedom House has documented that freedom of the press is in decline in nearly every region of the world, particularly in Asia, where none of the countries served by RFA have increased their freedom of the press during the past 5 years.
"(10) In fiscal year 2010, RFA is operating on a $37,000,000 budget, less than $400,000 of which is available to fund Internet censorship circumvention.
"(11) Congress currently provides grant funding for RFA's operations on a fiscal year basis."
LII has no control over and does not endorse any external Internet site that contains links to or references LII.


text:
GonFreeces31 wrote:I think I might start having to getting selective about who to invite. This guild's losing the feel of being a small close knit group and turning into the new OBK.
...we have like 25 members, with over half of them being from the very first year this game launched from beta.
If by new OBK you mean inactive for years on end, then yes I agree.


text:
- Homepage >
- News Archives >
- Article
Nurse case managers help wounded warriors receive optimal health care
November 15, 2011
By Rachel Parks, III Corps and Fort Hood Public Affairs
Story Highlights
- Every step of the way, the Soldiers are supported by registered nurse case managers, who help coordinate the best care available for wounded warriors.
- "For me, it's helping the Soldiers that are coming back from battle."
Related Links
FORT HOOD, Texas (Nov. 15, 2011) -- On any given day, the Soldiers of the Fort Hood Warrior Transition Brigade are undertaking a number of medical appointments as they navigate the path to healing and transitioning back into the military or into the civilian world. Every step of the way, the Soldiers are supported by registered nurse case managers, who help coordinate the best care available for wounded warriors.
To the Soldiers of the Warrior Transition Brigade, or WTB, the nurse case managers are advocates, supporters and friends, who make sure the medical providers and the military chain of command are communicating clearly regarding the wounded warriors.
"Our job here as the nurse case managers, is basically to coordinate all medical care so there's a continuation of treatment for these guys and that everybody is on the same page," said Cynthia Basham, a registered nurse case manager with Company C, 1st Battalion, WTB.
At Fort Hood, there are approximately 45 nurse case managers. Each nurse has approximately 20 Soldiers who they work with.
"They're assigned one nurse case manager, who they can come to anytime with their medical issues," Basham added. "Once they report those, we coordinate with their PCM (primary care manager) and we contact their specialty provider, so they do get the best care."
"We keep communication open to take care of the Soldier," added Carmen Boudreaux, a registered nurse case manager with Company D, 1st Bn., WTB.
But the nurse case managers take on a constantly evolving role with the Soldiers they work with. Boudreaux said she sometimes acts as a surrogate mother to young Soldiers who are hundreds of miles away from their families. Other times, she helps Spanish speakers understand their treatments or notes by translating information into their primary language.
She said each part of her job is something she cherishes.
"For me, it's helping the Soldiers that are coming back from battle. They have a lot of issues," Boudreaux said. "I'm so glad I can be there to help, not only them, but their families."
At one time, Boudreaux was a nurse in a psychiatric unit. She said she often saw former service members in the unit, who were still dealing with the memories of Vietnam.
"I'm working in this program now and I look back and I'm amazed at how much help the Soldiers have now," she said. "There are a lot of programs out there for them. All they have to do is request the help and we're going to provide for them. We are taking good care of the Soldiers."
The nurse case managers include both civilians and Soldiers. Lt. Col. Selina Williams, chief of WTB nurse case managers, came to the unit about five months ago after working as an operating room nurse at Carl R. Darnall Army Medical Center.
"It's just been fun and rewarding to make sure that we provide the Soldiers with everything the Army has to offer them. Whether that is medical benefits, or health and welfare benefits, I was just happy to be here to support that as a leader," she said.
All levels of leadership of the WTB work with the nurse case managers and doctors to address any issues that arise with the WTB Soldiers and remain proactive in their treatment. To do this, the nurse case managers need to be tied in with the Soldiers and their families.
"The key thing is trying to create that bond with these Soldiers and make them feel comfortable enough so they can discuss their issues, mentally and physically," Basham said. The wounded warriors always have access to a nurse case manager, Williams added.
"There's always a nurse case manager available, 24/7, on weekends, on holidays, someone is always available," she stressed. She added that she was amazed by the work the nurse case managers do on a daily basis.
"They put a lot of work into the Soldiers," Williams said. "They don't just sit down with them and say 'have you made your appointments?' This job is totally different than any other nursing job out there. Here, you're involved 24/7."
But the nurse case managers wouldn't have it any other way.
"To me, this is very rewarding," Basham said. "I get to give back to those that are fighting for my freedom and my family's freedom."
November is Warrior Care Month. This year's theme is "Healing the Mind, Body, and Spirit: Unlocking Unlimited Potential."


text:
President Jakaya Kikwete has deplored the habit of reproducing and marketing works of artists without authorization, saying this activity impoverishes artistes while fostering unfair gain by others.
He made the remarks when opening refurbished buildings of the National Museum, the house of culture and modern studios, where he lamented the fact that artistes have worked hard and put up good performances but their lot in life has scarcely changed.
Plagiarizing and unauthorized production and sale of their work was part of the problem, saying they are doubly affected, first seeing their work taken while they are helpless about it, and thinking that someone else gains by his or her work.
He said some people were driving posh saloons in town on account of the sweat and skills of others, "while those who created those works at times don't have the fare to board a daladala bus."
The president said he had donated a studio to help artistes record their works, but the result was that conflicts erupted among them, in which case he directed the new generation 'Bongo Flava' beat to use the studio at the National Museum.
He said the problem which erupted in relation to the studio had been resolved, in which case he expects that charges made to artistes wishing to record their works would be affordable, so that they can improve their incomes.
He also urged sports associations to preserve their records so that the memory of those who have done well in each field is not lost. He cited the case of soccer players who did well and helped national teams to win cups, that this should not be lost to future generations.


text:
Security Guard
Securitas Canada - Kamloops, BC
This job posting is no longer available on Indeed. Find similar jobs:Security Guard jobs - Securitas Canada jobs
About this company
WORK FOR THE EMPLOYER OF CHOICE IN THE SECURITY INDUSTRY! Securitas Canada is looking for new team members with the drive for success,...


text:
When you think of essential skin care products, toners and clarifiers might not be at the top of your list. Your beauty routine might stop with a cleanser and a moisturizer. Add DCL Toners and Clarifiers to complete your personal care regimen. These products are important to use in between cleansing and moisturizing to maximize the effectiveness of all of your products. Regular use of DCL Toners and Clarifiers will leave your skin looking and feeling fresher and healthier.
If you're using the wrong cleanser, it might not leave your face as clean as you think. Leftover dirt, oil, makeup, and residue can stay on your skin even after you clean it. That's why DCL Toners and Clarifiers are a must—they combat that hard-to-rinse-away excess buildup to leave your complexion perfectly clean. At the same time, DCL Toners and Clarifiers help to moisturize your skin and eliminate excess oil, which can build up throughout the day. Turn to DCL Toners and Clarifiers to complete your daily beauty routine. Your skin will be better cleansed, well moisturized, and simply glowing thanks to these effective products.
The right toner or clarifier can put the finishing touch on your daily skin-care routine. DCL Toners and Clarifiers ensure that your skin is well-cleansed. They rid your face of excess dirt, oil, and buildup that your average cleanser simply cannot eliminate on its own. The result is healthy, glowing skin that is better prepared to absorb your moisturizer or to respond to other treatments that may follow. Add a DCL Toner or Clarifier to your beauty routine today, and enjoy the benefits.
Every day, your face is exposed to buildup from makeup, dirt, oil, and grime. While a facial cleanser is an effective way to remove impurities and pollutants, sometimes, you need more. DCL Skin Freshener supplements your everyday facial-cleansing routine to eliminate that buildup that your cleanser might not have been able to tackle. DCL Skin Freshener is a gentle formula and does not include alcohol, so even sensitive skin types can use this product without any negative results.
Start your skin care routine with a DCL Cleanser to maximize the effectiveness of the DCL Skin Freshener. After cleansing and drying your skin, apply the DCL Skin Freshener to a cotton ball to remove any leftover dirt, oil, makeup, and residue. At the same time, this product tones your complexion to prepare it for the next step in your daily routine, such as moisturizing. DCL Skin Freshener also helps to control excess oil and hydrates your skin, leaving it soft and well-moisturized. Like other DCL products, the Skin Freshener is gentle enough that it works on all types of skin, even sensitive and delicate.


text:
All Terrain Vehicles (ATVs) can be extremely useful to hunters as they are designed for use on rough unpaved trails, and allow hunters to go places that are inaccessible with many other vehicles. However, ATVs can be extremely dangerous and require proper training. Always consult local regulations before using an ATV for hunting. These are some other considerations when riding an ATV:
Use proper safety equipment
A person is not protected when riding an ATV. It is particularly important to always wear an adequate helmet designed for ATV use, and to have appropriate footwear, as well as hand and eye protection.
Only use designated trails
ATVs can cause environmental damage. As such, many public trails are closed to ATVs or will limit their access. Before heading out, check local regulations to ensure that you are only using legal trails. If you are traveling through private property, always get the landowner's permission, and follow their instructions. Do not veer off marked trails, or cut through crops or fields. Keep off paved roads and roads with heavy traffic.
Maintain a safe speed
Riding on rough uneven terrain can be challenging. Be sure to always travel at a speed that will allow you to react in time to avoid obstacles such as rocks, trees, ditches, sharp turns, etc.
Safely Transport Firearms
Just like transporting firearms in any other vehicle, firearms should be unloaded, with the action open, in a protective case and with the muzzle pointed in a safe direction. Do not hunt from an ATV. It is an unethical and in most cases an illegal practice. Hunters should only use the ATV to reach and return from the hunting site.
Check Local Regulations
Before heading out on your ATV, check with local authorities on specific ATV regulations, equipment requirements, and to ensure you have the proper permits if required.
IMPORTANT! In Oregon it is illegal to hunt from any motorized vehicle, including ATVs. It is also against the law to carry a loaded firearm on an ATV. Know the law!


text:
Extensions Module Manager Feed Display
From Joomla! Documentation
Revision as of 16:49, 31 December 2011 by Chris Davenport (Talk | contribs)
Feed Display Module
This Module shows an RSS News Feed from a website. An example is shown below:
The Module Type name for this Module is "mod_feed". This Module is not related to the News Feeds Component or the News Feeds Layouts in the Menu Items - New/Edit screen but is an alternative that allows a feed to display in a Module position.
At the top right you will see the toolbar:
The functions are:
- Save. Saves the module and stays in the current screen.
- Save & Close. Saves the module and closes the current screen.
- Save & New. Saves the module and keeps the editing screen open and ready to create another module.
- Save as Copy. Saves your changes to a copy of the current module. Does not affect the current module. This toolbar icon is not shown if you are creating a new module.
- Cancel/Close. Closes the current screen and returns to the previous screen without saving any modifications you may have made.
- Help. Opens this help screen.
Basic Options
- Module Class Suffix. A suffix applied to the CSS class of the Module. This allows you to create customized CSS styles that will apply just to this module. You would then modify the "template.css" file of your template to apply styling to this new class.
- Enter this parameter with a leading space to create a new CSS class for this module. Enter the parameter without a leading space to change the CSS class name for this module.
- See the tutorial Using Class Suffixes in Joomla! 1.5/1.6 for more information.
- Feed URL. The URL address of the RSS news feed.
- Feed Title. Whether or not to display the Feed Title.
- Feed Description. Whether or not to display the Feed Description.
- Feed Image. Whether or not to display the Feed Image.
- Items. The number of news feed items to display.
- Item Description. Whether or not to show the Description or Into Text of individual items.
- Word Count. The maximum number of words to display in the Item Description. A value of 0 will display the entire Item Description.
Advanced Options
- Caching. Use Global/No Caching. Whether or not to cache the content of this Module. A setting of "Use Global" will use the Cache Settings from the Global Configuration screen.
- Cache Time. The length of time, in seconds, before the Module is re-cached.


text:
Back in 2005, we asked Children's Ministry
Magazine readers where children should worship. Of the 2,032 people
who responded, 48 percent said kids definitely belong in the
corporate worship setting-"big church"-and the other 52 percent
said kids belong in a separate children's church setting.
Today, in a smaller survey, 56 percent of children's ministers
surveyed said the kids in their church currently worship in a
separate children's church setting, while 44 percent said their
kids go to "big church" for worship. This same group said that the
majority of parents (90 percent) and their senior pastor (93
percent) agree with their current setup for where children
If your church is one of today's 44 percent that includes kids in
big church, are you accomplishing what you hope? Are you operating
with intention or just ushering kids in with their parents and
keeping your fingers crossed that they'll stay relatively quiet
throughout the service?
None of us aims for such lowly results-but the truth is many of
our "big-church solutions" to help kids make it through the service
designed for adults actually teach them the art of distraction,
mindless self-absorption, church irrelevancy, or worse. If your
church believes that children should worship with their families in
big church, you may be unwittingly hurting those kids' faith
through the hidden messages big church sends to them. Consider
these powerful messages kids are at risk of soaking up every
"It's okay for me to check out of church…I think I'll
do this for the rest of my life."
Getting kids to sit still and be quiet is more easily
accomplished by giving them coloring pages and word puzzles
designed to distract them into not being a nuisance. Kids fall into
the habit of daydreaming or checking out because they don't
understand the message or traditions, planting the seeds of
unhappiness and discontent with church in a child's heart. When we
give them random distractions, we're giving them an avenue to check
out. We're training kids to turn off their brains and fill worship
time with busywork rather than attention and participation. The
problem with this is that we're inadvertently teaching kids to
self-distract unless we give them something that has a direct tie
to that week's message. Anything we give kids has to get them more
involved-not less-in the service they're attending.