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fuglygirlonthebench 22-25, F 10 Answers 2 Aug 28, 2014 in Dating & Relationships
They mean to insinuate that some people out there think that there's such a thing as a bad sensitive, if they don't just mean themselves.
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They would mean that I care about others and take time to understand them and their situations.
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You are a very caring person. I am very sensitive.
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that u understand their feelings
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You care about other people and other living things.
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feel that it is the bigining of my learning to evade ego
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They mean you are a ******.
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Movies an out to eat maybe take a walk
Go to a movie or dinner and see where it goes from there
Anything fun. Movies, dinner, concerts, etc..
An afternoon viewing of Anchorman 2 maybe.
I think movies and dinner would be a good first date.
I enjoy dinner and dancing, movies, theatre, concert or a nice walk in the park talking and getting to know one another.
Not yet decided maybe a movie or a cup of coffee
I like action and comedy movies.
i love cinema, i love either going out to the show or cuddling on the couch.I'll pretty much watch anything. almost,not too much into girly flicks
Dinne movie mall walk In the park
I'd love to go see The Veronica Mars movie. I'm a huge fan and would be awesome to go see it with someone.
It's nothing like sharing a great movie with a great woman!
My first date would be lets go to the movies then to dinner then if everything goes good we can go back to my house and see were things go
I'm always up for a movies it could be at the theaters or at home just relaxing and watching old ones
My first date idea would be just to get to know each other, maybe enjoy a movie.
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subset: commoncrawl


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Orange XI.
We've seen plenty of samples and rarities from carter1203 over the last couple of years. What's one more? Here's some carter photos of an unreleased Air Jordan 2011 sample in White/Orange. As you can see, the shoe goes with a simple white upper with orange border and accents. The familiar translucent outsole is complimented with black herringbone traction pads.
Perfect for all those moments you have a Sunkist in your hand whilst mingling at get-togethers. Great convo starter.
Images via carter1203


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/ News
A jury was given a shocking video tour of an alleged murder scene.
Police recorded the footage after Sean Martin, 21, was found stabbed to death in the hallway of his girl-friend's 17th floor flat in a tower block in Coatbridge, Lanarkshire.
Shaniece Dobson, 21, of Motherwell, denies murdering Sean by striking him on the body with a pen and a knife on February 25 last year.
The accused sobbed in the dock as the gory images were screened at the High Court in Livingston.
Sean's sister Ann, 17, said the atmosphere in the flat changed after the couple returned with a takeaway meal.
She believed the couple were arguing over their ex-partners and over a can of cider.
She said Dobson suddenly grabbed a pen and tried to stab her brother.
She told the jury: "Sean said: 'What are you doing, you cow, trying to stab me?' He pushed Shaniece and she pushed him back and then Shaniece went into the kitchen and grabbed something next to the window.
"She came back with a knife. She went up as if to give him a cuddle then she did that with the knife."
Miss Martin made a stabbing motion with her fist clenched as if holding a knife pointing downwards.
The trial before Lord Boyd continues.
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Best Play-by-Play Announcer (2012)
Al McCoy, Phoenix Suns
A couple of years ago, the folks at Channel 3 pulled a major boner by running an erroneous headline on their website stating that legendary longtime Phoenix Suns radio announcer Al McCoy was hanging up his microphone and retiring. Much to the relief of Planet Orange fans everywhere (ourselves included), it thankfully turned out to be completely false. Because, honestly, we can't imagine Phoenix taking to the court without McCoy's distinctive voice describing all the action from buzzer to buzzer. Having called Suns games for more than four decades, the former Iowa farm boy is as much a part of the team as anyone on the current roster. His signature catchphrases (like "Shazam!" after the Suns make a three-pointer or "Heartbreak Hotel" after a missed shot) are the stuff of legend, as are the humorous nicknames given to players (such as Steve Nash's becoming the "Nash Rambler.") McCoy's set to turn 80 next year, but he hasn't shown any inkling of quitting. Here's hoping the Suns finally get their shizzle together to win an NBA championship before he retires. We're sure Al's as eager to call that moment as we are to hear it.
More Sports & Recreation Awards
Best Hard Worker in Valley SportsJared Dudley, Phoenix Suns
Best Hope for the Phoenix SunsGoran Dragic
Best Sports EccentricTrevor Bauer, Arizona Diamondbacks
Best Sports ExpatriateAndre Ethier, Los Angeles Dodgers
Best SluggerJason Kubel, Arizona Diamondbacks
Best Disappointment in Valley SportsJustin Upton, Arizona Diamondbacks
Best All-Around Baseball PlayerPaul Goldschmidt
Best Sports Field GeneralMiguel Montero, Arizona Diamondbacks
Best Hope for the Diamondbacks' FutureWade Miley, Arizona Diamondbacks
Best Attitude in Valley SportsJ.J. Putz


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Southern Baptists Try to Diversify Churches — But Will It Work?
How tough is it to create a racially diverse denomination? Consider a recent luncheon organized by the Southern Baptist Convention, the nation's largest Protestant denomination.
About 100 Nashville-area evangelical leaders accepted invitations to a lunch hosted by the denomination's policy arm, the Ethics & Religious Liberty Commission. On the agenda: a pitch for a spring summit and a short discussion by ERLC President Russell Moore about the need for churches to become more racially diverse.
The number of African-Americans who showed up for the lunch? Four (two of them denomination employees).
ERLC leaders originally planned a summit on bioethics. They quickly shifted gears after grand juries in November and December failed to indict police officers for the deaths of young unarmed black men. Moore's social media remarks condemning the New York City jury's decision not to indict the officer who killed Eric Garner were met with an angry backlash, some from people filling Southern Baptist pews and pulpits.
Black church leaders are greeting news of the summit with reactions ranging from polite skepticism to hopeful support.
The Oscar Scandal: Sean Penn, Alejandro Iñárritu, and Responding to Racism
"Sean Penn's 'Green Card' comment may have ruined the entire Oscars."
That was the headline from the Huffington Post. I didn't watch the Oscars, but I'm always curious about pop-culture scandals. What could Sean Penn have said that was so egregious that it threatened to ruin "the entire Oscars?"
Penn delivered the award for Best Picture, which went to Birdman. After Penn opened the card, he took an awkward moment to gather his thoughts about how he would introduce the winner, whose director happened to be his long-time friend Alejandro Iñárritu.
That's when Penn delivered the scandalous introduction, "And the Oscar goes to … Who gave this son of a bitch his green card? Birdman."
Black 'Future' Month
A Mandatory Mistake
On a July afternoon in 1995, a 33-year-old man named Curtis Wilkerson walked into a store, stole one pair of socks, and was promptly arrested. This wasn't Wilkerson's first crime, but it was surprising, considering his long streak of good behavior. The last time he was trouble with the law was when he was in his teens, after two offenses for abetting robbery. He was sentenced to six years.
After his release from that sentence, Wilkerson cleaned his life up. Instead of running the streets for money, he drove a forklift. All things considered, he was a "success story," earnestly walking that "straight and narrow" path — up until, that is, those gorgeous socks waved his way.
Why he did it remains a mystery. But since I was once an angsty teenage shoplifter, I imagine he was probably just bored. Hungry for a momentary thrill. An innocent-ish high. I imagine him thinking, it's just a pair of socks. $2.50. Not much more than a pack of gum.
But be it socks or a Chevy Silverado, the state of California did not care. Shortly following his arrest, he was brought before a judge and sentenced to life in prison.
In California, the three-strikes law was the law of the land. A type of mandatory minimum sentencing law, the law required judges to punish defendants guilty of their third felony with 25 years to life in prison. Stolen socks, most of the time, would've counted as a misdemeanor. But, and likely because he was black, Wilkerson was charged with a felony, his third strike. And consequently, was given the harshest punishment in the history of stolen socks.
In 2012, California voters approved a measure to reform the law, making mandatory life sentences only applicable to "serious" felonies, but even still, Wilkerson remains behind bars.
WATCH: A Brief History of Overt Racism in Professional Soccer
When fans barred a black man from boarding a train as they chanted racist lyrics after the Chelsea vs. PSG match on Feb. 17, it was only the most recent in a long history of similarly egregious acts.
Professional soccer is no stranger to racism. While such acts of overt bias should anger us, they should not surprise us. Whether it's chanted slurs, especially dirty tackles, or thrown bananas, racist behaviors emerge from a racist culture.
Below are videos of six of the most infamous incidents of racism in professional soccer since 2011. It is important to remember that these acts are only the explicit tip of an implicit iceberg. These are only some of the examples captured on video.
What the Chapel Hill Murders Reveal About the Place of Muslims in American Society
RALEIGH, N.C. — Deah Barakat took my class "Islam in the Modern World" at N.C. State University a few years ago. He was curious about Islamic history, contemporary spiritual and political movements, and was great in class discussions. I've taught thousands of students in the last 11 years here, but Deah stood out for his enthusiasm, kindness, calm demeanor and obvious charisma.
Deah Barakat, Yusor Abu-Salha, and Razan Abu-Salha were the very best people. They embodied the core Islamic principle of "ihsan" — doing that which is both beautiful in itself and beautifying to the world. They volunteered to assist poor and homeless people. They planned to travel to camps in Turkey to help Syrian refugees in need. They were creative, intelligent, kind, generous. There are no words for how much we have all lost when they were gunned down and murdered in their Chapel Hill condominium last week.
Yet many insist their murders resulted from a dispute over parking. While the particular motives of the shooter cannot be determined at this stage, it is abundantly clear that these deaths were not just about parking. It is also clear the emerging discussion is about the place of Muslims in contemporary America. As we analyze the meaning of Deah, Yusor, and Razan's murders, we are also peeling back layers of societal debates about Islam, Muslim-Americans, and the culture of intolerance and violence taking root in the U.S. On some level, it does not matter whether the shooter actually intended to kill three Muslims because they were Muslim. The public conversation is revealing several collective concerns in stark and disturbing ways.
LGBT Groups Plan Pilgrimage to See Pope Francis — With Support from Their Bishops
ROME — On its 15 previous pilgrimages, the Catholic gay rights group New Ways Ministry drew maybe two-dozen people to visit holy sites in places like Assisi and Rome.
This year, the number of pilgrims unexpectedly doubled to 50.
Chalk it up to the so-called Francis Effect, where the pope's open-arms acceptance is giving new hope to gay and lesbian Catholics who have felt alienated from their church for decades.
What's been even more surprising is that both New Ways and a similar Catholic LGBT organization in Britain are finding support from the Catholic hierarchy in their efforts to meet the pontiff when they both visit the Vatican on Ash Wednesday, the start of Lent, the period of penance and fasting preceding Easter.
For example, Archbishop Georg Ganswein, head of the papal household and the top aide to Pope Emeritus Benedict XVI, responded to New Ways' request for a papal meet-and-greet by reserving tickets for the group at Francis' weekly public audience in St. Peter's Square. It's not a private meeting — which is tough for anyone to get — but it's not nothing.
Addressing the Changing Face of Faith
The 6.5 million people in the greater Houston area now surpass New York City and Los Angeles as the most racially and ethnically diverse urban area in the U.S. That's the site where a broad spectrum of U.S. church leaders met this week to consider the impact of immigration on their congregations, and on the rapidly changing expressions of Christianity within North American culture.
The group gathered at the annual convocation of Christian Churches Together in the USA, which includes the leadership of the U.S. Catholic Conference of Bishops, several Pentecostal and evangelical denominations, the Orthodox Churches, some Historic Black churches, and nearly all the major historic Protestant denominations. All of these are experiencing the impact of immigration. Most dramatically, for instance, 54 percent of millennials — those born after 1982 — who are Catholic are Latinos. Of the 44 million people living in the United States who were born in another country, 74 percent are Christian, while only 5 percent are Muslim, 4 percent Buddhist, and 3 percent Hindu.
While church leaders in the U.S. have expressed united support for the reform of U.S. immigration laws, this is the first time an ecumenical body has gathered to examine together the actual consequences of immigration on the life and witness of its churches.
Can Obama Walk the Tightrope of Religious Rhetoric in a Polarized America?
After taking heat from the religious right for saying Christians and Muslims have all committed horrors in God's name, President Obama is now angering the religious left with an upcoming White House conference on combating "violent extremism" that seems to focus only on Muslims.
The back-to-back controversies raise the question: Can Obama — or any president — safely discuss faith in today's political crosswinds?
No, say experts who keep a close eye on presidential God talk. It's a perilous walk, taken without a safety net as news and social media voices wait to savage him in a nanosecond.
Obama's remarks at the National Prayer Breakfast triggered fury when Obama mentioned the Crusades, the Inquisition and Jim Crow segregation laws as examples of Christian violence in God's name.
"This is not unique to one group or one religion," Obama said. "There is a tendency in us, a sinful tendency that can pervert and distort our faith."


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Kohler on sex and execs: how DJs got it right in the end
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It's an interesting world when a successful CEO — Mark McInnes — gets his marching orders for reportedly trying to kiss a staff member, while an unsuccessful one — Malcolm Jackman — hangs on having halved the value of his company in a single day.
The Elders CEO may well follow McInnes into hiding before long, but you certainly can't accuse his board of being ruthless
A week after Mark McInnes' reign at David Jones came to such a shocking end, debate is still raging about whether the board did the right thing, and whether they are setting a standard for other boards and CEOs that is too high and too prudish. I think the DJs board has stumbled into doing the right thing: the end result is right and an important issue has been highlighted.
To be honest, when I first heard McInnes had been fired for two incidents of "inappropriate behaviour" at staff functions, I thought he must have got drunk and groped some poor woman in a corner.
Then when it was reported that he just tried to kiss her, I thought there must be more to the story. There was: on this occasion he "misread the signals" but apparently there have been plenty of other times, with other women, when he read them correctly, and the Prince and Cinderella then went off for a spot of quiet glass slipper fitting.
McInnes was single — though he's not now — and while he wasn't in the Tiger Woods class perhaps, he certainly "enjoyed the company of women", to employ the phrase often used about him these days. And DJs is full of women whose company he might have enjoyed.
However, if chairman Bob Savage is to be believed, he and the board knew none of this. The fact their CEO was what you might call an active heterosexual had not filtered into the boardroom. All Savage knew, he says, is the CEO came to him and said he'd been stupid with a female staff member and that the law firm of Rottweiler, Bull Terrier and Co was now on his tail.
Even though this was a first offence and McInnes had more than tripled the company's value, Savage didn't hesitate: out you go then. One strike and you're out. They then took a week to negotiate the money — $1.5 million on top of existing benefits, which is much less than McInnes would have got as a "good leaver" but still a fair bit for someone leaving in disgrace.
As a result, the DJs directors are in the unhappy position of being criticised by just about everyone — for getting rid of him too hastily and for paying him too much on the way out.
Often when both sides of an argument are criticising your decision, you know you've done something right, but in this case the DJs board has just left themselves looking stupid for not knowing what McInnes had been up to, and weak for not following through on their tough stance. But in fact I think McInnes' behaviour has indeed been disgraceful and, yes, he should have been sacked.
Whether the two incidents referred to in last week's statements, in which McInnes made unwanted advances on the same woman, consisted of sackable sexual harassment is a matter for the courts and for those involved. But where the DJs CEO has definitely behaved badly is in using his position over many years for sexual gain. It's no different to misusing your position for financial gain.
If McInnes had been extorting money out of female employees in return for promotion and other advantages, he probably wouldn't have just been sacked — he'd be in jail. But because he was simply a 'ladies' man' playing the field and reading signals, it's just part of corporate life. Just Mark being Mark. And anyone watching the TV series Mad Men knows this has been going on for a very long time.
Well, I think 'seducing down' should now be formally put on a watch list, and not just when it is clearly harrassment and the 'seducee' complains.
It is a delicate and complicated business to be sure, but in my view any manager who routinely cavorts with those under him or her, as it were, is suspect and should be formally warned, even if no one is complaining about harassment. A second offence should result in the sack.
Some office relationships between a manager and staff member are not based on exploitation, but I think the manager's superiors should assume it is and act accordingly. They should think about the sex as money: if they found out the manager was asking for cash would they think differently, even if the staff member was paying it willingly?
Companies should have a formal policy about office liaisons that are not harassment but may still involve exploitation. That policy should assume it's inappropriate, with the onus of notification and proof on the people involved.
So should McInnes have been formally warned and given a second chance? Well, yes — long ago. Two weeks ago he actually resigned, and the board had two choices: accept or reject. I suspect he just wanted out and it was best for all concerned for him to move on.
And by doing it messily and giving the prurient press a field day, Savage has inadvertently highlighted an important and overdue problem.
1Nigel WestrockPosted Wednesday, 23 June 2010 at 1:55 pm | Permalink
Just kissed her. See how you go when he gives you a kiss Alan.
2John BennettsPosted Wednesday, 23 June 2010 at 2:12 pm | Permalink
Alan has been a bit savage on Savage. He got it right all the way through. There is no easy, mess-free way to clean up this type of stuff.
Regarding workplace romances, there is a huge difference between a romance that develops outside the workplace between people who met at work and being heavied by the Big Boss.
Quite simply, any kind of attempt at physical intimacy at the workplace is a big red light, regardless of the rank of the initiator.
That is what appears to have happened here, and that is the problem. If a manager chooses to take a lesser mortal out to dinner (say) and that person agrees to do so, then there is a clear power imbalance, but at least a semblance of propriety.
As to an onus of notification being put on both employees… what world are you living in? Nobody wants to publish their first kiss to the HR Department, let alone further developments. Get real. Provided that things are properly consensual and not happening at work, then it is not a corporate matter.
3DeleriousPosted Wednesday, 23 June 2010 at 2:22 pm | Permalink
There are laws in place in relation to sexual harassment. The board had a choice and accepted his resignation but that doesn't stop the company being chased in court and being fined and all the other trimmings that go with this type occurrence. This won't go away and I'm sorry the media is chasing the woman in question. He admitted it so leave her alone.
4John WoodPosted Wednesday, 23 June 2010 at 2:31 pm | Permalink
Oh dear, what is it that Mr Kohler doesn't understand about inappropriate behaviour?
5James McDonaldPosted Wednesday, 23 June 2010 at 2:36 pm | Permalink
I won't win any popularity prizes for saying this, but there are a lot of happily married couples who hit it off that way.
6C.P.QuagmirePosted Wednesday, 23 June 2010 at 3:39 pm | Permalink
He's no great loss - Goddard and Zarha are the brains behind the operation.
7SusieQPosted Wednesday, 23 June 2010 at 4:01 pm | Permalink
Finally a company that has got rid of the problem and not forced the victim out, as is so often the case. DJ's are to be congratulated for their handling of this matter, even if the Board did seem to have been walking around with their eyes closed for a long time. Another reason to have more women on Boards???
8SusieQPosted Wednesday, 23 June 2010 at 4:02 pm | Permalink
And I meant to add, if DJ's had not dealt with this in the proper way, I for one would not have set foot inside one of their stores again.
9SocrateasePosted Wednesday, 23 June 2010 at 4:18 pm | Permalink
I had to read Alan's piece twice because it meanders so much around the core issue. It wasn't until I read …
"But in fact I think McInnes' behaviour has indeed been disgraceful and, yes, he should have been sacked."
… that I discerned his actual position on the matter.
As for …
However, if chairman Bob Savage is to be believed, he and the board knew none of this. The fact their CEO was what you might call an active heterosexual had not filtered into the boardroom.
… this is the bit of the whole tawdry affair that I have difficulty in believing. Individual members of the board, especially those who have been there for some time, would have to be deaf, dumb and blind not to have been aware of McInnes' reputation.
The fact that the woman involved had to resort to using workplace lawyers to make her complaint indicates to me that she knew that lodging a complaint via the usual route would have been fruitless in getting the unwanted behaviour to stop.
10SocrateasePosted Wednesday, 23 June 2010 at 4:25 pm | Permalink
@SusieQ: The woman involved may now have been forced out by all of the media attention. I hope it's not the case, but she has probably paid the traditional price of the whistle-blower.
It's up to Savage to make sure that the woman is not victimised within DJs, however with all of the media exposure involving her in the matter, I can understand if she now feels too uncomfortable to return to that workplace, and for that reason I hope that McInnes never lives down his own grubby reputation.
11CMLPosted Wednesday, 23 June 2010 at 4:26 pm | Permalink
@ JOHN BENNETTS - I agree with your comments. Mr. Kohler is just another dinosaur in a suit sounding very ambivalent about the fate of this McInnes person. To be fair, he does eventually come to the conclusion that the man in question should have been dismissed, but is that good enough? It almost seems that if you are good at making money you should expect to be cut a little slack. What crap!! Women too have rights these days, Mr. Kohler, and no doubt the courts will have the final say on this incident. By the way, where else did you expect the young lady to go if not to a lawyer? Totally off the planet!!
12Frank BirchallPosted Wednesday, 23 June 2010 at 4:55 pm | Permalink
Well, many thanks Superintendent Kohler of the Morals Police for this piece of guidance on how company execs and others should behave. Alan starts by saying that McInnes "reportedly" tried to kiss a staff member and then goes on as though the "reports" are fact. Alan then says that "apparently there have been plenty of other times, with other women .." also accepted as fact. So, unsurprisingly, McInnes is hung out to dry, guilty unless proven innocent. This, by the way, following McInnes' protestations that, contrary to widespread media reports, he had not "fled" the country via first-class air travel to Portofino.
We are then informed by Alan that McInnes has "definitely behaved badly" by using his position "over many years" for sexual gain. Says who? How can you be so "definite" Alan? In fact, how the hell do you know all this anyway? The moral equivalence of "extorting money" and "seducing down" (whatever that means, but let's call in the workplace lawyers to find out) is nonsense. The former is a cut and dried crime, the latter will often be harmless mutual attraction between consenting adults; that is, not equivalent at all.
Alan also says that although many workplace relationships are not based on exploitation, "the manager's superiors should assume it is and act accordingly" Sounds like a board room lynch mob to me, Alan. The whole piece is an outrageous example of an ill informed rush to judgment that, if ever unwisely implemented, will be welcomed with vuvuzuelas by the legal profession.
13JuliusPosted Wednesday, 23 June 2010 at 5:11 pm | Permalink
I only wish to comment on the logic of Alan's equating sex to money in this context so he can try and do better. Frank Birchall has already pointed out that the treatment of voluntary sexual activity as if it was the voluntary payment of money is nonsense. I would add the precise point that the sexual exchange is, or might be hoped to be, like both putting their money into a hat and drawing out twice as much when they do the lucky dip. If one gives money to the other the giver has less money. Sex based on mutual desire (whatever the occasion or motive for the first approach) is rarely like that.
14Liz45Posted Wednesday, 23 June 2010 at 5:50 pm | Permalink
James McDonald
Posted Wednesday, 23 June 2010 at 2:36 pm | Permalink
I won't win any popularity prizes for saying this, but there are a lot of happily married couples who hit it off that way."
Yes, James, but in this case,SHE WAS MARRIED TO SOMEONE ELSE AND HAD REBUFFED HIM ONCE BEFORE, and he's as good as - his partner is pregnant with his child! A real nice type!
@SUSIE Q - I'm with you! I've commented about this on an earlier site, and I'm glad that at last the message MIGHT be getting through! People should be able to go to work without the fear of being mauled and groped by some bloke who's a legend in his own wallet - and has a basic hatred/disrespect for women! Apparently, some other female colleagues classed his behaviour(of many years) "disgusting" Some blokes and sadly still, too many women don't get it!
Last night I re-read the results of a 12 month survey by two women in the Illawarra/Macarthur areas, who were working out of a women's centre, and the worst and highest number of complaints re harassment were of a sexual nature. Some worse case scenarios were;
being forced to watch pornography or having this type of grot sent via email;
groping and 'rubbing' etc in any area of common use - didn't know when it would happen;
belittling, humiliating comments about body shape or clothes etc, and many other criminal acts which also included verbal and physical abuse and stalking - for months sometimes?
In one case, the perpetrator was her boss's husband - she felt impotent, and so just left?
Many women just left as you said Susie, and others suffered such anxiety and stress, that they required psychological counselling etc. It's OK for men like James and others to be flippant and derogatory - in their own way, they're just reinforcing the impact of these gutless and ghastly activities - they're against the law! LAW law!
@FRANK BIRCHELL - "We are then informed by Alan that McInnes has "definitely behaved badly" by using his position "over many years" for sexual gain. Says who? How can you be so "definite" Alan? In fact, how the hell do you know all this anyway?"
Because there was an article in the Sydney Morning Herald(several actually) and other women contributed, commenting that they're glad he's gone; he's been behaving like this for years(with many women?) and his behaviour was "disgusting"?Some women left as they didn't believe that they had any power to do anything, considering his position v/s theirs? It's about POWER and CONTROL and has nothing to do with normal sexual attraction or friendship. Fair dinkim men don't behave this way!
25% of claims for harassment in the workforce are of a sexual nature? I suggest people go and take a look at the Human Rights and Equal Opportunity Commission with more up to date stats. I'm sure, that with other forms of abuse against women on the increase, while many other crimes over recent years have decreased(robberies and car thefts etc)one could justly assume, that these types of crimes have in no way decreased?
Very sad and horrific for victims Frank!
15davidkPosted Wednesday, 23 June 2010 at 6:06 pm | Permalink
Can we believe he just tried to kiss her?
Got mydoubts.
16SocrateasePosted Wednesday, 23 June 2010 at 6:08 pm | Permalink
@Liz45: Although some early media reports said the woman involved is married, subsequent reports have her living with her boyfriend. So, 'in a relationship' would be more accurate.
17John BennettsPosted Wednesday, 23 June 2010 at 6:41 pm | Permalink
It is entirely irrelevant to this discussion whether he was seeking a peck on the cheek or something more.
The principle is clear enough to me. If his advances are made at work, that is cause enough for concern. That he tried again after a rebuff is the second part of the story.
From there on, it is only a matter of degree. He has already crossed two lines, in my book.
Irrelevant: Name, Marital/partner status, age difference, power difference, physical details. The verdict stands. These matters only serve to justify/mitigate the penalty.
I am horrified by the behaviour of this man, who certainly has the means to obtain sexual favours from willing paid partners if he was so desperate. Why a CEO would demean his corporation in this manner is beyond me. It indicates a possible irresponsible attitude to other business matters.
The board had no choice but to obtain advice, check their facts and then to act. So what if this took a week? As I heard it, the COE was on leave during this period. Hopefully, the lady concerned received support during this period as well, so that the public explosion would not come as a surprise.
18SusieQPosted Wednesday, 23 June 2010 at 7:40 pm | Permalink
John Bennetts, you are just about right, except, as Liz45 says, this is about power and control - he was in a position of power over these women so exploited the situation- we've all come across these men before (sadly) - he won't be the first, won't be the last. Many men, while sympathetic and horrified by these things (and we appreciate that) still don't understand thats what its about - physical, mental, financial, policital power over women. Its why girls in some countries are being pulled out of school at 13 to be forced into arranged marriages, subjected to genital mutilation - I could go on, but this could turn into a rant!
19John BennettsPosted Wednesday, 23 June 2010 at 7:57 pm | Permalink
Noted. I do not disagree with your position re DJ's. I really feel for the lady concerned. The corporation, the other players and, particularly, the journalists and editors have done her a grave disservice. That she has been publicly identified amounts to assault. It is horrid.
Genital mutilation has been going on for many centuries, as any visitor to my shower might notice. Thankfully, this is not the main topic of todays' column, nor, as far as I know, mandatory for DJ's employees. Female genital mutilation, to me, includes the social pressure which leads to many forms of plastic surgery, not just the barbaric practices which first come to mind.
Thanks for reading and understanding my contribution. I think that we both disagree viscerally with the lead article, because it misses the point, which is that this is about people, not corporations. I could not give a stuff about the CEO. I hope that the lady is able to put this behind her and regain control of her life.
20Liz45Posted Wednesday, 23 June 2010 at 8:19 pm | Permalink
@DAVIDK - Whether or not he "just tried to kiss her" the fact is, that she'd rebuffed him once and he persisted? With the wealth of information I've gained over many years, there is more to this story than just a so-called? innocent act! Other women have alleged that he was a 'serial offender' whose behaviour was found to be "disgusting"? He was not a teenager or a twenty something - he's 45?
JOHN BENNETTS - At last, another bloke who gets it! Thank you!
@SOCRATESE - "@Liz45: Although some early media reports said the woman involved is married, subsequent reports have her living with her boyfriend. So, 'in a relationship' would be more accurate."
It matters not! This young woman had rejected his advances once before. He was the CEO, a person of 45 yrs of age. He could've found out her circumstance via her personnel file or by inquiries, the fact remains, that he had no right to take advantage of his position and assault her. That's what sexual harassment of this nature in the workforce is about - it's about POWER and CONTROL of another person in order to gain sexual advantage - I hasten to add, that it's not for gratification - he had a partner didn't he? It was about domination of a person in a position of vulnerability.
Most people have no problem understanding the relationship if there's two people of the same sex perhaps, and one has a weapon - a knife or? Or even if they're of different sexes - people can grasp that element of POWER and CONTROL, and I might add, the 'excitement' apparently the perpetrator feels seeing another person powerless and vulnerable? This is of a similar nature.
Don't forget, that as well as his position of CEO he's a man - not a small man by any means. He also had physical POWER and CONTROL over her. Believe me, that is a horrific and terrifying position to be in! It just makes you feel sick and weak from fear, and the knowledge, that if 'push comes to shove' you're 'cactus!
I hope this young woman, and those others in the same work environment who've experienced similar assaults, have a strong support network; of people who love and support them, but most importantly, believe their 'story' and are appalled and concerned on their behalf!
When we really love and care about people, we validate their right to be affronted, and support them in their quest for justice! That's what I've spent most of my adult life trying to do! People would be shocked and stunned at half the stories I could relate - as many others who've been in a privileged person could attest to. I promise you that they are all true!
We've got to speak with one voice about our disgust and revulsion of this sort of behaviour!Enough is Enough!
21SocrateasePosted Wednesday, 23 June 2010 at 9:08 pm | Permalink
@Liz45: I didn't imply, nor do I believe, that it doesn't matter, I am simply updating you on the facts. Okay?
22SocrateasePosted Wednesday, 23 June 2010 at 9:09 pm | Permalink
@Liz45: Go back and read my posts and tell me where you get the idea that I support McInnes.
23Frank BirchallPosted Wednesday, 23 June 2010 at 9:51 pm | Permalink
LIZ45, don't believe everything you read in the newspapers, they're simply not that reliable. The SMH also reported that McInnes had flown to Portofino first-class and this has since been shown to be false. Have a look at today's piece in the SMH by Ross Gittins concerning natural bias of news media towards bad and sensational news. Like it or not, anyone accused of bad behaviour by the media (or by unidentified persons reported in the media) is entitled to fair and just treatment until such time that there is independent evidence as to their guilt.
24John BennettsPosted Wednesday, 23 June 2010 at 10:44 pm | Permalink
@Frank Birchall:
I have immense respect for Ross Gittins, but not necessarily on this subject. His article has not come my way yet. I also have no interest in the seating arrangements on the plane that a past CEO may or may have not taken out ofd Australia.
However, this issue is about the response of a Chairman of DJ's to an agreed (but not published) set of facts in relation to an accusation, made through a firm of lawyers, that a CEO has behaved inappropriately with a staff member. The CEO has not significantly disputed the facts as presented and has fallen on his sword.
Neither you, nor I, nor shareholders, nor journalists, nor editors are entitled to more information than that. We, the Australian public, have no need or entitlement to pry further.
The Board and the Chairman have used a week or so to finalise their response. I presume that legal advice was sought and obtained by the Board, through the Chairman. I also presume that the agreed facts are truthful, which include:
* The COE accepted that his behaviour appropriately resulted in his resignation or sacking.
* The CEO took leave during the short period while the Chairman obtained advice.
* The Chairman, after deliberation and recaipt of advice, negotiated a separation agreement with the CEO.
* n announcement was made to the market re departure of the CEO and the reasons therefore.
There is no reason to query the Chairman's decision. The essential facts have not been disputed. The resignation of the CEO is appropriate and is final.
The CEO has departed the scene, whether by first class air or by second hand donkey, it matters not at all.
Nobody, journalist or editor or private person or shareholder, has any right to further information. The young lady involved has suffered enough. Please leave her alone and stop digging in the dirt.
You say that certain persons are entitled to fair and just treatment until their guilt or otherwise has been established. Let me summarise: CEO Guilty.
The lady involved is entitled to privacy, support and an end to the dirt-digging. She has been damaged enough. Please do not support any extension of this inquest, for whatever reason.
25Liz45Posted Wednesday, 23 June 2010 at 11:27 pm | Permalink
@FRANK BIRCHALL - Frank, the fact is, that a man who's enjoyed an extremely high financial and personal position of power has been forced to resign, due to an "inappropriate" situation involving a young woman. Just because the other women at said company didn't give their names(for obvious reasons) but complained of bad and "disgusting" behaviour, you'd have to be totally naive not to know what's ocurred? I mean come on? How old are you? Where have you been? Have you ever even researched Sexual Harassment in the Workplace? Do you know anything about it at all? I suggest not! Do you think his resignation would've been accepted if it was a trivial 'event'? Would they have wanted the sworn evidence of even one other victim? If he was forced into an unjust or unfair situation, wouldn't the Board have supported him to 'clear his name'??
@SOCRATESE - Okay!
Sorry, I really only meant the first paragraph under your name to be a direct response to you. The rest was to those who still try and defend him. I apologise for any wrong comments you may have felt were to you! I must pay attention to this in future!
And no, you have not supported McInnes! Good for you!
26Liz45Posted Wednesday, 23 June 2010 at 11:45 pm | Permalink
Below is just a small extract from the web site.
The last sentence is also very important, as it clearly states, that employers have a responsibility to have a policy in place in order to protect workers from sexual harassment by others. Now, if the very head person of the company or workplace is a 'serial offender' it follows, that no such policy would be in place - it certainly has not been operative!
The Chinese have a saying, ' a fish rots from its head'? Says it all really. Some women have referred to the "blokey culture" in that workplace!
"What is sexual harassment?
Sexual harassment is any unwanted or unwelcome sexual behaviour which makes a person feel offended or humiliated. It has nothing to do with mutual attraction or consensual behaviour.
Sexual harassment can include:
staring, leering or unwelcome touching
suggestive comments or jokes
sending sexually explicit emails or text messages
repeated unwanted requests to go out on dates
intrusive questions about a person's private life
requests for sex
displaying posters, magazines or screen savers of a sexual nature.
A person who sexually harasses someone else is responsible for their behaviour.
Employers can also be held responsible for sexual harassment by their employees if they haven't taken steps to prevent it from happening."
For more information on practical steps to prevent sexual harassment see: http://www.humanrights.gov.au/sexualharassment/
27SocrateasePosted Thursday, 24 June 2010 at 10:35 am | Permalink
McInnes will be thankful that a different woman is currently in the headlines.
28AstroPosted Thursday, 24 June 2010 at 9:47 pm | Permalink
Interesting story
29Moira SmithPosted Thursday, 24 June 2010 at 10:30 pm | Permalink
'Whether the two incidents referred to in last week's statements, in which McInnes made unwanted advances on the same woman, consisted of sackable sexual harassment is a matter for the courts and for those involved. '
But, thank goodness, not a matter for Alan K.
I attended a seminar at work this week on harrassment, and the word 'unwanted' was KEY in defining whether behaviour was sexual harrassment or otherwise. We were told, it's in the legislation.
The fact that McInnes (or anyone) had to do it TWICE to the same person, and still didn't get the message, speaks volumes.
30Liz45Posted Friday, 25 June 2010 at 12:27 am | Permalink
@MOIRA - Indeed! I agree!
At the bottom of my last post it states very clearly(except from the anti-discriminationAct) that it's the employer's responsibility to ensure that workers are not harassed. There's supposed to be a policy in place. It wouldn't surprise me if no such policy existed at this workplace - perhaps in every DJ's store? Hope they learn from this and do what the law states!
31John BennettsPosted Friday, 25 June 2010 at 12:58 am | Permalink
Liz45, DJ's are far too large a corporation to not have an anti-harassment policy embedded within its EEO policy framework.
Enforcement is another thing entirely, especially in the corridors of power.
As I said above, what I find most disturbing about this issue is the naming and publication of supposed details of the goings-on which this employee has been subjected to. It is absolutely disgraceful she is being subjected to further injury and is being prevented from getting on with healing her life. This sort of gutter journalism limits the options for those involved and pushes them into corners where litigation is virtually unavoidable, although they know from the outset that recourse to courts will stigmatise the complainant, force everybody into defensive stances and, at best, can only pick up the pieces after the event.
It is also disturbing that journalists are free to disclose private matters in this way, when personal details and details of the incident are really nobody else's business.
We need a Bill of Rights in this country, yet many in the legal profession are against it. Somewhere I have a letter from Hon. John Hatzistergos, BEc LLM MLC, Attorney General, Minister for Citizenship, Minister for Regulatory Reform, the responsible Minister in NSW, explaining in waffle that he does not support one. Minster for regulatory reform? What has he been doing in this role for the past couple of years?
32Liz45Posted Friday, 25 June 2010 at 1:33 am | Permalink
@JOHN BENNETTS - I agree with you. Sadly, the fear and intimidation felt by those who are abused in this manner prevents many of them from taking action.
It's not unusal for women who've been on the receiving end of such treatment to require counselling for some time. In too many cases women are unfit for work for long periods of time.
I know of a young woman who was suffering RSI being internally examined for pregnancy by a doctor the insurance company sent her to.
I know of another woman, who while she was asking her employer for a workers comp form for RSI, had her small car picked up by a fork lift in the car park and moved to another place!
Another was threatened with cutting off her workers comp if she didn't 'come across'? She refused, the so-called doctor wrote a negative report, and her money was cut off!
Women have been stalked, pushed, mauled and many other traumas by men in the workplace and other situations as well.
I feel very sorry for this young woman, as I know how traumatic this type of assault is, and how much courage women like her display, when they refuse to be treated this way! I hope she has a loving partner and close family to support her - if she does, her ability to survive this and get on with a happy and fulfilled life will be realised. I wish her well!
Like you, I support a Bill of Rights. Those who are against this are usually the ones who gain by abusing other people's rights!


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Ninja Master (ZX Spectrum)
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You already know this man. He was the one who decided, right around six months ago, not to renew his iPhone contract because the apps simply weren't worth all the dropped calls. He started watching 30 Rock with Season 3 (while catching up on Seasons 1 and 2 on Hulu) but cleared out the DVR the instant Salma Hayek's character squealed in Spanglish. He sported a lumberjack beard for a while—just like countless woodsmen roaming the hamlets of Portland, Oregon, and Brooklyn still do—but by the time Joaquin Phoenix did his pantomime of disillusionment on Letterman, he'd already reached for his razor. And then one recent evening, having discovered somewhat late—but not embarrassingly so—the pleasures of nursing a small-batch bourbon in the dimly lit confines of a neo-speakeasy, he recognized the hollowness at the core of the conversation going on between the mustached mixologist behind the bar and the vest-clad patron sitting at the end of it. So without any undue ceremony, he closed his tab and walked out the unmarked door, never to return to that bar—or any other neo-speakeasy.
You know this man, right? It's just that you've never been properly introduced. He's a lone cowboy by the name of First Dropper, and while we tire climbing the hilly switchbacks of compulsive trend hunting, his straight and level trail is the one we'd all do well to follow. Unlike most consumers, the First Dropper seems to be immune to peer pressure and the sway of marketing gurus; he's propelled instead by an instinctual feel for when a trend has become overvalued. Think of him as a slyly influential arbiter of taste—one who operates as a covert counterweight to his better-known cousin, the Early Adopter.
As the first to cuff his skinny jeans, the first to tout the glories of grass-fed beef, and the first to deem Grizzly Bear the new Arcade Fire, the Early Adopter has long been considered the driveshaft powering the cultural marketplace. But in this era of the Long Tail, when the enormous profusion of ever-nichier trends has brought diminishing returns on each new act of adoption, that perpetually with-it friend of yours is starting to seem less like a maverick than a cool-hunting technocrat—a guy who's willing to do the yeoman's work of keeping track of all the tips being fed through his RSS reader and patient (or is it self-regarding?) enough to select which ones merit tweeting to his "followers." Sure, we're interested in hearing about a new special-edition pair of Wayfarers, but what we really need—at a time when we're beset by a veritable plague of trend spotters—is the guy who can tell us when to let our popped collars lie flat. And our weariness has not gone unnoticed. For marketers, advertisers, Internet-start-up heads, and fashion designers have recently begun the difficult work of identifying and targeting the First Dropper—with the hope of placating him before it's too late or at least knowing if their time is running out.
"The First Dropper is sexy because he's a rugged individualist and scary because he's always upending what others consider hip," says Greg Behr, who coined the term with Billy Warden, his partner at GBW Strategies, a marketing firm based in Raleigh, North Carolina. "When the First Dropper finds that things he's been sold don't fully work," adds Warden, "he has the guts to go against the tide and stand up and make a decision on his own. Jesus is the ultimate First Dropper, Ben Franklin and the founders of America were First Droppers, Martin Scorsese and all those rebels in the seventies who pushed the boundaries of film were First Droppers. These are the guys you want to emulate, not the dude who's simply willing to wait in line for two days to be the first to own an iPad."
Now, it bears noting that the Dropper should not be mistaken for that other naysaying social archetype, the Hater. The Hater simply hates. And the reasons why he hates—by never throwing his chips on the table, he guarantees he'll never lose—are so clearly understood that the Hater fails to intimidate. He hates hybrids because everyone in Hollywood is driving them. He hates the new Franzen novel because he hates Franzen the man, not the novel. And he hates the latest hot organic restaurant because it has the gall to serve its incredibly tasty food on small plates. The Hater, in short, has no credibility, whereas the First Dropper, for all his willingness to join a trend before he drops it, is so impervious to influence that he becomes the most credible person you know.
"The person who decides that something is no longer relevant can be just as impactful, even more impactful, than the one who anointed it," says Noah Kerner, the author, along with Gene Pressman, of Chasing Cool: Standing Out in Today's Cluttered Marketplace. "The guy who says no is compelling and mysterious, and he kind of makes you wonder why you're still saying yes. Actually, the guy who says no is always cooler—that is, unless you're talking about sex."
One such guy is Cory Doctorow, the blogger, novelist, and co-editor of the highly influential website Boing Boing, who posted a withering missive in April titled "Why I Won't Buy an iPad (and think you shouldn't, either)." "It was simply about making a discriminating choice," Doctorow says. While his screed didn't exactly put Apple out of business, it did reveal deep fissures in the company's famously loyal fan base: Within days, hundreds of consumers had rallied to Doctorow's side. "The First Dropper," he says, "is like a gourmet who hears everyone talking about this new hot dog: 'Yeah, it's made out of lips and assholes like every other hot dog—but this one's really good!' Then the gourmet tries the hot dog and he realizes, nope, it's just lips and assholes."
As yesterday's Early Adopters (of whom Doctorow was once the ne plus ultra) become today's Droppers, companies are beginning to realize that the people who already use their products and services can determine the fate of their business just as much as, if not more than, those on whom they once spent their entire marketing budgets trying to court. Despite the cyber-riot that greets Facebook every time it alters its privacy settings, the world's largest social network "is probably the best example right now of a company that goes to incredible lengths to make sure none of its users are inclined to go somewhere else," says Caterina Fake, the cofounder of Flickr, whose newest venture, Hunch, is a website that helps people build their own "taste profile." "MySpace basically failed to keep up. But Facebook keeps becoming something new. Twitter gets popular, so Facebook becomes more like Twitter. People get obsessed with checking in on Foursquare, so Facebook adds Places"—a new feature allowing users to share their location in real time—"to essentially keep Foursquare at bay." Just think: If Friendster had paid such close attention to its early deserters, you'd probably still be there writing testimonials about your sad-sack single friend right now.
And yet maybe you, and your sad-sack friend, and all the girls he hopes—with your help—to one day date, have seen others join MySpace, then Facebook, and thought, 'You know what? Friendster's just fine for me.' In which case, you should own it. Because the very thing that separates the First Dropper from the Hater—his indomitable confidence in his own (positive) taste—is something each man must develop for himself. Sure, the First Dropper might have an unerring sense for when a trend is in its 14th minute, but that doesn't mean that you shouldn't stick with it through the 16th and beyond. Simply take heed of the First Dropper as you would a weather vane, an unobtrusive guide, for he is, as Doctorow notes, one of those "people with a grasp of something that is not always visible... If the Dropper is the most knowledgeable person in the room, why not listen to him?" If, that is, you haven't already left.
1) THE EARLY ADOPTER Has his ear to the ground and knows what's coming before anyone else.
2) THE TRENDSETTER A sucker for the buzz.
3) THE LATE ADOPTER Doesn't jump on the bandwagon until it's all but finished its run.
4) THE RE-ADOPTER Always first in line to start the comeback.
Read More:
2010 Mavericks: 16 Game-Changers to Know
The Rise and Fall of the Black Card


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Things to see and do - Christchurch
Leaving for New Zealand
Nearby hotels
Colombo In The City from155 NZDBook
City Centre Motel from140 NZDBook
CentrePoint on Colombo from173 NZDBook
Things to do nearby
5-Day New Zealand North and South Island Highlights Trip
- 1039 €
- Book
Lord of the Rings - Journey to Edoras from Christchurch
- 156 €
- Book
5-Day South Island Tour from Christchurch
- 1092 €
- Book
CentrePoint on Colombo :
Nearby tourist sites
CentrePoint on Colombo
CentrePoint on Colombo
Address : 859 Colombo Street NZL - Christchurch 8013
from : 173 NZDBook
Spacious air-conditioned accommodation, with free WiFi in the heart of Christchurch awaits guests at this modern motel. The hotel's is centrally located, just a short walk from various attractions. Victoria Street boasts some of the newest and best dining options in Christchurch and guests are able to walk to Container Mall, Transitional Cathedral, Casino and Botanical Gardens. All guest rooms have a kitchenette with a microwave for the preparation of breakfast or a light lunch. Your attentive hosts are happy to arrange various tours for you, including a shuttle service to and from Christchurch Airport or railway station. Christchurch Airport is a 20-minute drive away.
Useful Information
- Address : 859 Colombo Street NZL - Christchurch 80138013Christchurch
Main services
- Air conditioning
- Disabled access
- Non-smoking rooms
- Satellite TV