text:
"Jesus emptied the devils of one man into forty hogs and the hogs took the edge of a high rock and dropped off and down into the sea: a mob"
- Carl Sandburg
(We start with Ryan and Brennan sitting in a classroom, writing something down)
RYAN: Hey dude, did you hear?
BRENNAN: What?
RYAN: Yeah, apparently they're going to digitize all the report cards, so they're not just going to hand you a paper copy, meaning I don't ever have to know what my grades are!
BRENNAN: I think they're doing that because they're trying to go green this year.
RYAN: I don't care if they're trying to "go green this year". I'm just saying I don't ever have to know and what I don't know can't hurt me. That's why I didn't read up on how to avoid the flow.
BRENNAN: But aren't you going to get an earful from your parents when they hear about your grades?
RYAN: That'll be like a million years from now.
(A black screen comes up and there is text reading "A MONTH AND A HALF LATER". Then, cut to Ryan sitting on his laptop in the living room)
RYAN: Oh no, it can't already be mid-April! He has to be angry about something else! Maybe it's because I sold his truck to a ragtag team of two-bit punks? Maybe it's because I taped the cat to the fridge! Maybe it's because I bought an unmanned drone with his credit card! (Ryan pinches his face. Cut to a shot of the bottom of the stairs, facing upwards. Demonic grumbling is heard as someone wearing gray slacks and black shoes with a cane and a belt in hand walks down the stairs, but we can only see him from the waist down. Then, he makes his way all the way down the stairs. Cut to a shot of a ball in the hallway. The demonic unseen father-figure makes his way down the hallway and kicks the ball)
(Cut to Ryan right next to a window. He screams a girly scream and opens the window, which is on the first floor and he runs out. Cut to a title slide reading "Ignorance is not bliss! Check your report cards online!" while "Kalimba" plays. Cut to a class in Hansbay High watching that skit on the promethean board in their classroom. A lot of them are laughing, except Alan and Luther, who are in the classroom)
ALAN: It wasn't bad.
LUTHER: Would've been way better if we did it though.
ALAN: Way better. We would've incorporated Harlem Shake somehow.
LUTHER: That would've been so funny.
(Cut to Ryan, Alan, Luther, Natasha, Kirsten, Faith, Cooper and two other chicks sitting in the KDGM classroom)
KIRSTEN: Good skit yesterday, Ryan.
RYAN: Oh, thanks. By the way, I saw you guys made a new intro.
ALAN: Yeah, we filmed it on Monday.
RYAN: Yeah, I wasn't in it for the group shot at the end.
LUTHER: You were sick, remember?
RYAN: Yeah.
ALAN: Yeah, sorry, we just had to get it done.
(Ryan looks down as he plays with his hands and he flips his hair once. He looks disappointed)
RYAN: It's like whatever…
ALAN: What?
RYAN: I said it's like whatever…
ALAN: Are you saying you want us to refilm it with you in it?
RYAN: Well…
LUTHER: Jesus Christ, is that what you want us to do?
RYAN: (Whiny voice) Yes! That's what I want you to do.
ALAN: Oh my God, fine!
FAITH: I am not looking forward to Stem getting here, she is never in a good mood on Wednesdays.
ALAN: That's true.
(Mrs. Stem comes in)
MRS. STEM: Good morning everyone! (She sits down) Let's get started, everyone had great skits on Tuesday, especially Ryan Donahue, who is finally coming around! Let's give him a round of applause. (They all clap for him) Good job.
RYAN: You told me to drop it at one point.
MRS. STEM: Yeah, yeah, anyway, what a great show for KDGM yesterday.
ALAN: Mrs. Stem, Ryan insists that we reshoot the group scene at the end of the intro so as to include him.
LUTHER: And we think that might be a waste of-
MRS. STEM: Do it! We need him included, he is a fixture! By the way, check out these sparkly shoes! (She gets up and walks to where people can see her sparkly TOMS shoes) Sparkly shoes! Sparkly shoes! Anyway.
(She sits back down)
ALAN: What the fuck is going on?
LUTHER: I don't know.
MRS. STEM: Let's see your ideas.
(Everybody hands in their ideas. Cut to Alan and Luther in the KDGM studio, sitting on couches)
ALAN: I don't like how happy Mrs. Stem is today.
LUTHER: I know! She's not supposed to be so bubbly. What has she got to be happy about? She's a 63-year old woman with a husband and a fulfilling job.
ALAN: But she could pass for 83.
LUTHER: Thank God she didn't mention Random B.
ALAN: Yeah, didn't remember to ask us for it, so we're in the clear. Now watch this drive.
(Alan stands up, picks up a pink ball and throws it into the wall and it bounces back and hits him in the face. Cut to Mrs. Stem in her office, typing on her computer. Ryan walks in with a flash drive in hand. Mrs. Stem turns to him)
MRS. STEM: Hello, Ryan!
RYAN: Hi. Here's my random B.
MRS. STEM: Oh, (She takes it) thank you.
RYAN: You're welcome.
(Ryan walks away and walks past Kirsten, who gives Ryan a dirty look. Cut to Ethan and Kimberly sitting at the dinner table. Ethan is on his laptop with dollar bills coming out of his suit pockets)
KIMBERLY: Why…what's with the money in your pocket?
ETHAN: Is that a money in your pocket? Or are you just happy to see…money?
KIMBERLY: Didn't answer my question.
ETHAN: I'm rich! Yesterday when I saw the DOW Jones break the record, I sold!
KIMBERLY: You sold?
ETHAN: That's right!
KIMBERLY: Ethan, you shouldn't have done that, we need that money for retirement. We could get more if we sell later.
ETHAN: I don't need stocks! Despite, Obama's socialism, the economy's coming back.
KIMBERLY: Not really, the DOW Jones industrial is a measure of the health of the thirty largest companies in America, not the overall economy; it's an extremely antiquated index. Poverty is still high, unemployment is still high-
ETHAN: Yeah, because of Obama's socialism.
KIMBERLY: I thought you said the stock market was doing well in spite of Obama's socialism?
ETHAN: If Romney was President, the DOW would have soared so high that the Western Hemisphere would have run out of cocaine and those jackasses on the totally-necessary trading floor would have SHIT their blue jackets.
KIMBERLY: They trade millions of worthless securities a second, they would be allowed to do that whether Obama was President or Romney was President.
ETHAN: Anyway, I'm up for a promotion anyway, so me selling my stocks was not the worst move in the world.
KIMBERLY: You're up for a promotion? That's awesome! To what?
ETHAN: Head Chief of Staff. That means Evan would be under me and I would get a pay raise.
KIMBERLY: That's great, when do you find out whether you get it?
ETHAN: Today, I guess.
KIMBERLY: Well, good luck. And please buy some stock.
ETHAN: Fine. It's just that my broker told me to buy low and sell high.
KIMBERLY: Wait, you told your broker to sell?
ETHAN: Yep and it turns out he bought blow and he sold high.
KIMBERLY: Nice.
(Cut to Ethan sitting across from Mayor Sarandon in his office)
MAYOR SARANDON: So, Mister…(Checks his paper) Donahue?
ETHAN: We know each other.
MAYOR SARANDON: I understand you want to be the Head Chief of Staff, what are your credentials in that field?
ETHAN: Well, first of all, I served as Head Chief of Staff for twelve and a half years.
MAYOR SARANDON: Hmm. And who did you serve under?
ETHAN: You.
MAYOR SARANDON: No sir! The only person who's served under me is-
ETHAN: Stop.
MAYOR SARANDON: My secretary! We're all equals here.
ETHAN: Except for your secretary?
MAYOR SARANDON: Yes.
ETHAN: That's so unfair to her!
MAYOR SARANDON: Be that as it may, Evan is clearly not a contender for your job and unless the ex-Pope wants to throw his oversized hat in the ring, the job's yours, kiddo.
ETHAN: Thank you, sir. (Ethan shakes Mayor Sarandon's hand. Cut to Ethan and Evan sipping coffee near each other in the break room) Nice day we're having.
EVAN: Yeah, if you're a fan of shit.
ETHAN: Wow, you're bitter.
EVAN: I don't know why, I basically have a tenured position here because I blackmailed Mayor Sarandon.
ETHAN: Trust me kiddo, blackmail doesn't land you in good places.
EVAN: Says the guy who's not in prison right now.
ETHAN: That was divine providence.
EVAN: Yes, God was your defense attorney.
ETHAN: In the words of Leviticus, "'do not pervert justice; do not show partiality to the poor or favoritism to the great, but judge your neighbor fairly."
EVAN: In the words of Deuteronomy, "fuck you and your new promotion".
ETHAN: Super bitter! What do you have to worry about? Oh yeah! YOU have leverage over Sarandon, who is your boss, but YOU do not have leverage over me, who is also, as of 10am on Wednesday, March 6, 2013, your boss!
EVAN: I'm assuming you're going to abuse your authority and hold it over me?
ETHAN: I'm not going to abuse my authority; I'm going to use my authority.
EVAN: Do you think that was a clever evasion? Because it wasn't.
ETHAN: Evan, I'm going to need you to ask every member of the city council their life story and record it on audio and then type down the gist of all of them, make it in the range of ten pages and have it on my desk by tomorrow morning, it's part of a "Get-to-know your council member" program I'm launching. I heard our oldest member, Jim Hessings has some very insightful stories about the time he saw Joshua having a three-way with a dodo bird and a cactus during the Battle of Jericho.
EVAN: Why are you doing this?
ETHAN: Why do you think?
EVAN: I…I actually don't know.
ETHAN: Take a wild guess.
EVAN: What? I'm basically the reason you didn't have any competition for the promotion!
ETHAN: Yeah, but…you punched me six months ago, so there!
EVAN: Come on!
ETHAN: Listen, you don't have any incentive to work because you have no chance of getting fired, so I'm going to make you work, got it?
EVAN: Fine, whatever.
(Evan and Ethan walk their separate ways. Cut to Oliver, Madeline and an Indian-American student sitting in an empty conference room. There is a banner reading "Menstrual Awareness Young Democrats of New England Tech")
OLIVER: If the Supreme Court strikes down section five of the Voting Rights Act, all the racist counties will go hog wild discriminating against minorities. Maybe even women! Right, Aedesh?
AEDESH: (American accent) Of course, but Justice Scalia thinks that it's difficult to get rid of "racial entitlements" through the legislative process. "Racial entitlements" like the right to play basketball in front of people, the right to say the N word and apparently, the right to VOTE.
OLIVER: Don't forget Aedesh, that he said that shit right in front of Clarence Thomas, the black justice.
AEDESH: What is he gonna say? He went seven years without saying a word during oral arguments.
OLIVER: (Southern drawl) Because he's insecure about his southern drawl.
(Madeline and Aedesh laugh)
AEDESH: (Southern drawl) I like my docket like I like my giblets in the mo'nin, hot and fresh.
OLIVER: (Southern drawl) I castrated a chicken before this proceedin', ain't no giblets about it.
(They all laugh)
MADELINE: So guys, I really appreciate that you got this Menstrual Awareness meet together.
OLIVER: No problem, I do think women's health is an important issue to focus on, considering the widespread ignorance about it.
(Duncan, Howard and Donald enter the room wearing blackface)
DUNCAN: (Offensive black voice) Well how'we doin', mammies?
MADELINE: (Laughing) Oh my God!
(Madeline takes out her phone and starts filming it)
AEDESH: What are you doing?!
DUNCAN: What? I thought this was Minstrel Awareness.
OLIVER: MENSTRUAL AWARENESS! Not minstrel!
HOWARD: The e-mail said minstrel.
(Oliver and Aedesh look at Madeline, who puts away her phone)
MADELINE: I'm not great at spelling.
AEDESH: Oh, God.
OLIVER: Even if you thought it was a minstrel show, how on Earth would you think this would be appropriate?
DONALD: It's a celebration of our historical culture.
OLIVER: Yeah, our historical culture was racist!
MADELINE: Guys, this is supposed to be about menstrual cycles.
HOWARD: C'mon, mammies! We can still talk about menstrual cycles!
MADELINE: Why do you think black people call everyone mammies?
HOWARD: I's be sweatin' in this here room, I need a mammy melon and some fried MAMMY!
OLIVER: That is INCREDIBLY racist! Stop! This Menstrual Show is over!
HOWARD: So this was a minstrel show?
OLIVER: No, I said MEN-STRU-AL! God!
(Cut to Oliver and Madeline sitting in Oliver's dorm)
MADELINE: That was a total disaster.
OLIVER: I know. They walked around campus like that!
MADELINE: Partying like it was 1899.
OLIVER: Hopefully we can contain this. Turn on the news.
(Madeline takes the remote and turns on the news. There is a man in a suit at a desk reading the news)
MAN: Hello and welcome to Warwick Action News. I'm Bruce Kallen. The Transport Security Administration announced today that starting in April, certain small pocket knives would be allowed on planes. This coming after the revelation that the 9/11 hijackers may not have used box cutters to commandeer the planes, but may have used a super-sized bottle of Jergens.
MADELINE: Nothing so far.
OLIVER: Yeah, it's looking good.
BRUCE: Meanwhile, Kentucky Senator Rand Paul is currently engaging in a very long filibuster of the confirmation of John Brennan for the position of CIA Director due to the fact that Senator Paul sent Attorney General Eric Holder a letter asking if President Obama had the authority to use a drone to kill an American citizen on American soil and the Attorney General said in extreme cases, yes. Senator Paul reportedly plans to sneak out of the Capitol Building in Strom Thurmond's spare casket so as to avoid detection by Obama's predator drones.
MADELINE: I think we're in the clear!
(The female news person starts speaking)
FEMALE ANCHOR: Moving onto SCANDAL AT NEW ENGLAND TECH!
MADELINE: Goddamnit!
OLIVER: The female anchor has to ruin everything!
FEMALE ANCHOR: Recent reports reveal a controversy is brewing at New England Institute of Technology, because several reports, pictures and videos posted online show a group of students in blackface parading around the school's campus. Let's take a look at those extremely offensive videos.
(Cut to security camera footage of Howard, Duncan and Donald walking down the hall of a dormitory at New England Tech in blackface)
HOWARD: Let's talk about women's COONtributions to society!
(They all laugh)
MADELINE: Those sons of bitches KNEW it wasn't a minstrel show!
(The next security camera video shows Howard, Duncan and Donald in the conference room in blackface, talking to Madeline, Oliver and Aedesh)
DUNCAN: (Offensive black voice) Well how'we doin', mammies?
HOWARD: I's be sweatin' in this here room, I need a mammy melon and some fried MAMMY!
OLIVER: God, they're going to be in HUGE trouble.
(The TV then shows security camera footage of Oliver, Madeline and Aedesh talking in the conference room with Howard, Donald and Duncan)
OLIVER: Don't forget Aedesh, that he said that shit right in front of Clarence Thomas, the black justice.
AEDESH: What is he gonna say? He went seven years without saying a word during oral arguments.
OLIVER: (Southern drawl) Because he's insecure about his southern drawl.
(Madeline and Aedesh laugh)
AEDESH: (Southern drawl) I like my docket like I like my giblets in the mo'nin, hot and fresh.
OLIVER: (Southern drawl) I castrated a chicken before this proceedin', ain't no giblets about it.
(They all laugh. Cut to Madeline and Oliver watching that)
OLIVER: That is-that is COMPLETELY out of context! We were making fun of him because he's southern not because he's black!
(Someone knocks loudly on Oliver's door)
AEDESH: (From outside) ARE YOU WATCHING THE NEWS?!
(Aedesh comes in)
AEDESH: Dude, can you believe this unsubstantiated crock?
OLIVER: It's a video of us mocking the voice of the most powerful black judge in America and suggesting he has some unnatural propensity for giblets and chicken castration!
AEDESH: Because he's southern!
OLIVER: I know!
MADELINE: Can we stay out of the news for a week? That's all I'm asking for is a week.
OLIVER: I should get a press office to release meaningless statements that no one believes.
AEDESH: I'll get my calligraphy pen!
MADELINE: Now is not the time to find an excuse to show how smart you are!
AEDESH: Yes, I should not extempore scurrilous affectations.
MADELINE: Oh my God…
(Cut to Kirsten walking into the KDGM studio where Alan, Luther, Faith, Cooper, Natasha and the rest are hanging out)
KIRSTEN: Big bad news cats and dogs-
ALAN: Hold on just one second. Don't fucking start any piece of bad or good news like that ever again.
(Luther laughs an annoying laugh)
KIRSTEN: Oh, that's so grating. Anyway, Ryan gave Mrs. Stem Random B.
(Alan stands up, as does Luther)
ALAN: That callous emo rat! Why would he do that?
FAITH: It's a tacit agreement that we don't turn in Random B if she doesn't ask for them, nobody but Ryan and I brought it, and I didn't turn it in!
LUTHER: We should go accost him.
ALAN: I think he's on the computer in the other room.
(They all walk outside the room and walk over to the computer area and they see Ryan on the computer)
GIRL: Hey Ryan…what the fuck?
(Ryan turns around)
RYAN: What?
KIRSTEN: Why would you turn in your Random B?
ALAN: If most people don't have something and Mrs. Stem doesn't mention it, you don't say SHIT to her!
NATASHA: If you want US to have your back, then you gotta have our ass.
LUTHER: No one wants your ass Natasha, but still, point well made.
RYAN: I'm sorry, can we dispense with the mob mentality for a second? You guys can't get angry at me because I turned my Random B in on time and you guys, through no one's fault but your own, neglected to do the same. I will not go down with the ship based on your guys' lack of action.
(The screen goes into a dreamy dissolve and then shows the same scene, but Alan is talking)
ALAN: If most people don't have something and Mrs. Stem doesn't mention it, you don't say SHIT to her!
NATASHA: If you want US to have your back, then you gotta have our ass.
LUTHER: No one wants your ass Natasha, but still, point well made.
RYAN: …I uh, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to fuck you guys over, it won't happen again.
ALAN: Okay. Lesson learned.
LUTHER: Alan, don't be so forgiving so quickly, I have other things I need to get off my chest. Fuck you Faith!
RYAN: Why are you looking at me?
ALAN: Luther, just cool it. He's learned his lesson and I'm sure he feels remorseful for his actions.
RYAN: (Quietly) Of turning my shit in on time.
ALAN: What's that?
RYAN: I said the Orioles are doing well this season.
LUTHER: …I mean, I guess. Baseball season hasn't even started yet.
(Faith, Cooper, Natasha, Kirsten and the rest leave)
RYAN: I have to work on a skit.
(Ryan picks up a camera which has a mounted microphone on it and he stands up)
ALAN: Actually, er, we need that camera.
RYAN: Why?
LUTHER: Our skit! It's for Easter, we're going to put little…like, in the eggs, we're going to put, there's gonna be a bunny…it's hard to explain.
RYAN: Probably because you're not even trying to explain it.
ALAN: Anyway, camera please.
RYAN: Why can't you use another camera? This skit has to go on air tomorrow and yours can't air until late March!
LUTHER: The others are being used.
RYAN: I know. But, my skit should take priority, right?
ALAN: Compromise alert! We will take the camera. (Alan grabs the camera from Ryan) You can keep the microphone. (He removes the mounted mic and hands it to Ryan) Awesome.
(Alan and Luther walk away)
(Cut to a very bored Evan interviewing a senile old city council member in his office. There is a recording device on his desk. The plaque on his desk reads "THE HON. CITY COUNCIL MEMBER JIM HESSINGS")
JIM: When I was a young man, we would play tiddlywinks in the yard with an empty can of rat poison and little pieces of bread. Of course, the person who won got to eat the bread that day; it became very violent since we were in the midst of the Depression. I had seventeen brothers, sisters and one cyclopean freak locked up in the basement. We called him Stevey, but we rarely spoke.
EVAN: Oh my God…
JIM: My father caused the Hindenburg Disaster.
EVAN: Wait, really?
JIM: Yes, used our neighbor Mr. Hindenburg's well to water our crops during the Dust Bowl.
EVAN: You knew what you were doing there.
JIM: By the way, could you do me a favor?
EVAN: I will not look at a mole for you.
JIM: No, I need you to talk to Mayor Sarandon for me. My constituents who operate the Tug Boats on Lake Champlain are complaining there's not enough law enforcement on the lake, because homeless stowaways keep finding their way onto the boats. Could you bend his ear about that?
(Evan smiles)
EVAN: …He's kind of a busy man, but…I could talk to somebody about it.
(Cut to Ethan in his new office. He has his feet up on the table. His plaque reads "THE HON. VEN. ETHAN LEONARD DONAHUE THE FIRST, LLC")
ETHAN: Wow, I never had an office when I had this job before. This is sweet. I could walk around naked in here if I wanted to. But I don't.
(Evan walks in)
EVAN: Ethan?
(Cut to Ethan, who is buttoning his shirt back up as if he was trying to take it off a second earlier)
ETHAN: What?
EVAN: Sorry for barging, but I feel I should suspend the…very important biographical project I'm working on to instead inform you of an impending concern of the Hansbay government.
ETHAN: Oh?
EVAN: Yes, as you know, there are parts of our city that border Lake Champlain.
ETHAN: Oh?
EVAN: You…you didn't know that?
ETHAN: No, I did, I just like saying "oh?"
EVAN: Okay. Anyway, there's a tug boat operator here who wants to bend your ear about something.
ETHAN: Why don't you bring it to Mayor Sarandon's attention?
EVAN: Things are still awkward with him a little bit.
ETHAN: Fine, send him in.
(Evan opens the door and in comes a tug boat operator, a relatively average weighted man in his early 40s with a mustache)
TUG BOAT OPERATOR: Hello there, sir.
(Ethan stands up and shakes the man's hand. They then sit down as Evan stands behind)
ETHAN: Nice to meet you, mister…?
TUG BOAT OPERATOR: Mister who?
ETHAN: Um…you're supposed to say your name when I do that.
TUG BOAT OPERATOR: Oh, I'm Irville Satch, M.D.
ETHAN: You're a doctor?
IRVILLE: No, my full name is Irville Satch Miller DeGette…
ETHAN: Oka-
ETHAN: Moving on, what is your grievance, Mr. Satch?
IRVILLE: Sir, every damn morning I go outside to see a homeless man on my tug boat, eating sandwiches and jerking off into a spittoon, and I say "Well, at least he's got shelter from the heat."
ETHAN: It's forty-six degrees outside.
IRVILLE: Anyway, I usually just ignored him and kept on driving my tug boat. But he sings a lot and now I'm annoyed. Sir, we need the police to enforce the law more effectively to remove the rampant scourge of vagabonds squatting in Lake Champlain's tug boats.
ETHAN: I couldn't agree more with that, Mr. Satch. We will look immediately into that.
IRVILLE: Good, because I'm not the only one who's complaining about this.
ETHAN: I'm sure you aren't. Thank you for bringing it to my attention.
(Mayor Sarandon walks in)
MAYOR SARANDON: What's going on in here?
EVAN: Nothing, sir.
(Irville stands up)
IRVILLE: Oh, Mr. Mayor, it's a pleasure to meet you.
(Mayor Sarandon shakes his hand)
MAYOR SARANDON: It's nice to meet you as well, Mister…?
IRVILLE: Mister what?
ETHAN: C'mon man, we worked on this. Brian, this is Irville Satch. He's concerned about an uptick in homeless people squatting in his tug boat and masturbating into spittoons.
MAYOR SARANDON: Ah yes, an age old problem.
IRVILLE: Is it really?
MAYOR SARANDON: I've never heard of it. But, my suggestion would be to put that tramp to work. You know, make him swab the deck. Especially if the spittoon dumps over! (They all laugh and Mayor Sarandon shakes Ruben's hand once more) See to it that this problem is fixed, Mr. Donahue.
ETHAN: Yes sir.
(Mayor Sarandon leaves as they all come down from laughing)
IRVILLE: I like that man.
ETHAN: Yeah. Anyway, we'll get back you, Mr. Satch.
IRVILLE: God bless you three.
(Irville shakes Ethan and Evan's hands and then leaves)
ETHAN: Well, awesome. I'm into the glamorous work of policing tug boat masturbation. Thanks for bringing this to my attention, EVAN.
EVAN: Ethan, I was going to take care of it! I just wanted
permission from you in order to suspend the biographical
ETHAN: Well now Sarandon's dumped something in my lap, I can't just delegate it to you! ESPECIALLY since he hates you.
(Evan sits down)
EVAN: Ethan, I can prove myself to you. I'm not some listless lackey; I can do wonders for this town!
ETHAN: You have de facto tenure! Now suddenly you're ambitious? Go off and do what tenured professors do! Teach communism and sleep. Sarandon's not going to promote you to anything since you blackmailed him.
EVAN: I can blackmail him into promoting me!!
ETHAN: Too risky, at that point he'd probably just let you go public with the news, honestly, how much would it damage his already-tarnished reputation?
EVAN: He'd have to kill a hooker to be forced out of office, wouldn't he?
ETHAN: He'd have to kill two.
EVAN: Wow. Well Ethan, I guess this gives me no choice but to prove myself to you. And wait until Sarandon dies, resigns or retires.
ETHAN: Well…do you want to take that homeless masturbator together?
EVAN: Yes. Let's do it.
(Ethan and Evan stand up and walk out of the room. Cut to Madeline, Oliver and Aedesh standing outside someone's apartment door)
AEDESH: Just knock on it.
(Oliver knocks on the door. Duncan opens the door wearing the blackface with kiwis on his eyes and he's wearing a white bath robe)
MADELINE: Jesus Christ.
DUNCAN: No, it's just me.
(Duncan chuckles)
OLIVER: Dude, have you been watching the news even?!
DUNCAN: No, I've been watching the Birth of a Nation.
AEDESH: The 1915 silent film glorifying the Klan?!
DUNCAN: No! The 1982 film with Jim Broadbent, you psycho!
OLIVER: HE'S the psycho? You went around campus with your dumbass friends in blackface! And right now you seem to be confusing blackface and avocado and kiwi skin treatments. PLUS you're wearing a white bath robe, which just adds insult to injury.
MADELINE: How are you keeping the kiwis on there by the way?
DUNCAN: I have to squint like an Asian person to keep them there.
AEDESH: Oh my God, you're digging yourself a deeper and deeper hole!
DUNCAN: What's the big deal? We were just having fun.
OLIVER: Duncan, there was a KKK scandal at Oberlin college in Ohio, that Jewish politician from Brooklyn wore blackface and the media hound dogs are feasting on this story like jackals. Mongrels and jackals!
DUNCAN: Wait, (He takes off his Kiwis) I was on the news?
MADELINE: Oh my God, yes!
DUNCAN: Well…time for DAMAGE CONTROL!
(Cut to Duncan as a guest on the Warwick, Rhode Island local news)
DUNCAN: This is excessive political correctness at its worst.
BRUCE: You don't think the criticism is founded?
DUNCAN: Absolutely not, people need to chill out.
(Cut to Duncan, Madeline, Oliver and Aedesh speaking backstage at Warwick local news)
DUNCAN: I KFC doubled down!
OLIVER: You KFC fucked up!
DUNCAN: I haven't tried that one yet.
AEDESH: You know what, you can deal with your scandal, we will deal with ours.
MADELINE: We're not doubling down, though.
OLIVER: Yeah. (Pause) Well, it was just a joke.
AEDESH: That's…that's true, plus, we were making fun of his southern origin and his silence, not his African-American heritage.
MADELINE: Right.
(Cut to Oliver, Aedesh, Madeline and Oliver outside the news studio at night)
OLIVER: Oh my God, I think we doubled down.
AEDESH: Now I see how people on the news do this.
MADELINE: We've pissed off the southern people, the black people and the Supreme Court Justice Clarence Thomas people.
AEDESH: But I think we've pleased the Anita Hill people.
OLIVER: Speaking of which, I could kill for a coke right now.
MADELINE: I'll tell you what we could kill for right now.
AEDESH: What's that?
MADELINE: …A public relations expert.
(Cut to Ryan sitting on the computer in the KDGM studio, very slouched in his posture)
RYAN: God, my neck hurts. I really shouldn't sit like this. But it's not like cavemen had great posture just because they got more exercise. They had to sit on rocks! How comfortable is that? It's not, is the answer to that question I just posed to myself. (Pause) I wonder if Facebook has any suicide pacts I could join. (He types something in) Ooh, it's blocked.
(Mrs. Stem walks into the studio)
MRS. STEM: Ryan, why aren't you out shooting?
RYAN: All the cameras are gone.
MRS. STEM: But this needs to be air tomorrow!
RYAN: I guess I can do it at home.
MRS. STEM: It involves interviewing the principal, Ryan.
RYAN: He can't come to my home?
MRS. STEM: He can't wink at you without getting fired.
RYAN: Good point.
MRS. STEM: Wait, I saw you with a camera when you left, did someone take it?
(Ryan turns towards Mrs. Stem in his chair)
RYAN: …No.
MRS. STEM: Then where is it?
RYAN: …Fine, someone did take it.
MRS. STEM: Who?
DISEMBODIED VOICE OF NATASHA: If you want US to have your back, then you gotta have our ass.
RYAN: Um…
MRS. STEM: It's a simple question, Ryan.
RYAN: It was-
MRS. STEM: Was it Alan and Luther?
RYAN: It was…Key and Peele.
NATASHA'S DISEMBODIED VOICE: Nice.
RYAN'S INTERNAL MONLOGUE: Shut up, dyke.
NATASHA'S DISEMBODIED VOICE: You shut up!
MRS. STEM: I'm gonna give a stern talking to Alan and Luther, the likes of which the world has never seen since yesterday when I made that freshman cry.
RYAN: You made a freshman cry?
MRS. STEM: That's why I don't let freshman into this class, they cry too much!
(Mrs. Stem walks away)
RYAN: Well, shit. I wonder if they can deliver those suicide pacts in thirty minutes or less. Maybe some crazy bread on the side. What the fuck am I talking about?
(We cut to Alan and Luther walking through the hallway holding Easter eggs and Alan is holding the camera)
ALAN: So what's the first scene?
LUTHER: We put the, uh…there's a, the bunny and there's Easter eggs…it's kind of hard to explain.
ALAN: We have to know what it is!
(Stem walks up to them)
MRS. STEM: Hello, gentlemen.
LUTHER: Hi.
MRS. STEM: I understand that you took the last camera away from Ryan, who needed it the most.
ALAN: No! We're not going to run. Mrs. Stem, we apologize for the mistake and we will give the camera to Ryan as soon as this conversation ends.
MRS. STEM: Get it to him before this conversation ends.
LUTHER: Meaning?
MRS. STEM: Meaning this conversation isn't over UNTIL IT'S OVER! I need you to RESPECT my time, the school's time and the time of our newcomers and if you can't do that, maybe you guys need to split up until your sophomores in college.
LUTHER: You're not following us to college, are you?
MRS. STEM: I've heard Rutgers has a great broadcast journalism program.
LUTHER: Oh Jesus. RYAN! WE HAVE YOUR CAMERA!
(Ryan walks over)
RYAN: I heard my name.
(Luther hands him the camera)
LUTHER: Here's your camera, RUN!
MRS.STEM: NO! Because I need your guys' random B.
RYAN: Oh God.
ALAN: Um…we don't have it.
LUTHER: Don't speak for me, but yeah, I don't have it either, so…
MRS. STEM: I need random B, I will NOT air that video of the Star Wars kid again.
ALAN: You're using Random B from 2003?
MRS. STEM: I'm desperate! People like YOU and everyone in the class except Ryan and Faith have not turned it in. GET IT DONE!
ALAN: I will. Before you go though, this (Alan holds up a flash drive) is my independent project for this six weeks.
(Alan hands it to Stem)
MRS. STEM: Thank you.
(Mrs. Stem walks away and Alan and Luther turn towards Ryan in outright derision)
RYAN: That was rough, huh? Heh. Um…I'm gonna go film and you guys…yeah. Cool. Great. Bye.
(Ryan walks away)
ALAN: …God, that kid gets under my skin.
LUTHER: I know. I should get under your skin.
ALAN: What?
LUTHER: His skin is what I meant.
ALAN: Oh, okay.
(Alan turns his head to the right and Luther leans in for a tongue-filled kiss, but Alan looks to the left again and Luther nonchalantly looks to the left as if nothing happened. Cut to Irville meeting with Ethan and Evan on the dock of Lake Champlain, near some tug boats. They shake hands)
IRVILLE: Thanks for coming down, you guys.
ETHAN: It's our pleasure, Mr. Satch.
EVAN: Where are the AFL-CIO guys?
IRVILLE: They'll be here soon. Say while I was bending your ear about the tug boat "satch-uation" as I've taken to calling it,
EVAN: Yikes.
IRVILLE: I was wonderin' if I could bend it even further.
ETHAN: By all means.
IRVILLE: Well, I'm doing a one man show at the Hansbay Community Center tomorrow; it's called "The Irville Satch Experience" and it's eight hours of me sitting on a tree stump on a stage. of sorts, basking in the glory of my 40 plus years on God's green earth, just just, just, just... trying to get by on a tug boat operator's buck-a-rooni! Here, I'll give ya a taste, on a summer's day I was hopping God's green earth minding my own bees and I happen upon, on God's green earth, a gold watch-
(Lindol Atkins Junior walks over, followed by a bunch of tug boat workers)
ETHAN: Mr. Atkins, it's a pleasure.
(Lindol shakes Ethan and Evan's hands)
LINDOL: Likewise. I'm Lindol Atkins Junior, the President of the Vermont AFL-CIO.
EVAN: I'm Evan Alexander, the Chief of Staff to Mayor Sarandon and this is Ethan Donahue, the head Chief of Staff to Mayor Sarandon.
LINDOL: Sounds like Ethan's higher up and should've therefore, introduced the two of you.
EVAN: …Yeah.
LINDOL: Listen, the Tug Boat union's demands are pretty simple. You increase police presence around your part of Lake Champlain, or they go on strike, demanding extra pay from their company for having to kick bums off of their tug boats.
ETHAN: I see, well we guarantee that we will focus, like a laser, on this issue.
LINDOL: Will you increase police presence like a laser?
ETHAN: …I've got to make a call.
(Ethan walks a little ways away and takes out his cell phone and calls Mayor Sarandon. Cut to Mayor Sarandon at his desk with a plate in front of him containing chicken, mashed potatoes and corn. He is holding utensils. "Shimmer" by Fuel starts playing as his ring tone and he answers the phone while picking at his chicken)
MAYOR SARANDON: Hello?
ETHAN: (On the phone) Brian, these AFL-CIO tug boat workers are saying they're going to go on STRIKE if we don't increase the police presence around Lake Champlain, because they want extra compensation for kicking off the indigents.
(Mayor Sarandon eats a piece of chicken)
MAYOR SARANDON: (Mouth half full) There's no way we can afford more police presence with the revenue we have now.
(He swallows)
ETHAN: Can't we just raise taxes?
MAYOR SARANDON: Ethan, you forget yourself! We're conservatives; we don't raise taxes even if it makes sense! Shit, don't you want a chance at a fifth term in 2016?
(He starts eating some corn)
ETHAN: Well, what if they go on strike?
MAYOR SARANDON: (Mouth half full) That won't be good, because the tug boat company they work for, Immersion Tug, was one of my biggest campaign donors last year and look what unions did to Hostess.(He swallows) Shit, don't you want a chance at a fifth term in 2016?
ETHAN: Wow, it sounds like either way we're not getting that fifth term.
MAYOR SARANDON: Ethan, these are AFL-CIO tug boat workers. If you mention March Madness once, they'll forget how to count to one on their index finger. Just cajole them and (Mayor Sarandon pours gravy on his mashed potatoes as he says this next line) it'll all be gravy.
ETHAN: What?
(Mayor Sarandon puts the gravy cup down)
MAYOR SARANDON: Just fix it.
(Mayor Sarandon hangs up. Cut back to Ethan on the phone. He hangs up, takes a deep breath and walks over to Evan and the AFL-CIO workers, who are heartily laughing)
AFL-CIO WORKER: Gonzaga's definitely going to be upset.
LINDOL: My money's on Pittsburgh.
EVAN: I couldn't agree more.
ETHAN: Hey guys, about the-
EVAN: Vermont University Catamounts and how they're going to kick UMBC's ass this Sunday.
IRVILLE: They totally are. My brother bet on it. Not with me, but…still.
ETHAN: Wait, so-
EVAN: So nothing, everything's worked out.
LINDOL: Yeah, you promised you'd look at it, right? Good for you.
ETHAN: Yes. Yes, thank you. What about that linsanity, huh?
AFL-CIO WORKER: God, that was so long ago.
AFL-CIO WORKER 2: Wasn't there something we were supposed to get from them as a condition of-
EVAN: The Miami Hurricanes!
LINDOL: Yeah! They suck.
IRVILLE: I'm so glad we were able to work out this agreement. If anyone's interested, my one-man show, "The Irville Satch Experience" is at the Hansbay Community center tomorrow, March 8-9, 2013, from 8pm to 4am the next day. I'll tell you the story of the time I found someone's watch on the ground and it turned out to belong to someone I knew. Bring your dancin' shoes and there will be no questions.
LINDOL: Wow, you are a garrulous motherfucker, aren't you? Thanks you guys! We're gonna go.
ETHAN: Bye!
EVAN: Bye.
(They shake hands and Irville, Lindol and the AFL-CIO workers walk away)
ETHAN: You managed to cajole them enough to make them forgot about the impending strike which, literally minutes ago, they were adamant about?
EVAN: That is correct.
ETHAN: Nicely done, Mr. Alexander.
EVAN: Thank you.
(They shake each other's hands. Then, a homeless man walks by holding a Hustler magazine)
HOMELESS MAN: Do you guys know where the nearest tug boat is? (They point to the west) Thanks.
(He walks westward. Cut to Madeline, Oliver and Aedesh sitting in a conference room with a balding man in a suit and glasses)
MARKETING CONSULTANT: So, you want me to change your guy's
AEDESH: Yes.
MARKETING CONSULTANT: How rude of me, I should introduce myself. My name is Blowjob Ice Cream.
MADELINE: …Excuse me?
BLOWJOB ICE CREAM: My name is Blowjob Ice Cream.
OLIVER: …Um…are you sure?
BLOWJOB ICE CREAM: Psych! Starring James Roday! My name isn't Blowjob Ice Cream, it's Roday James! But! Blowjob Ice Cream sounded more appealing to you guys, right?
AEDESH: Not really, it was very crass.
RODAY: Sorry, lactose intolerant homosexuals like Aedesh here not included, most people like ice cream and blowjobs, but those are clearly against his Islamite religion, so just pretend my name was Anal C-4. Speaking of which if you're expecting me to improve the image of a gay Muslim, then I have my work cut out for me, no pun intended.
MADELINE: No pun made! Okay? Aedesh isn't gay.
OLIVER: What we need you to do is do damage control on the video of us making fun of Clarence Thomas and the fact that we hosted a little get-together that ended up somehow becoming a minstrel show.
RODAY: Okay, I'm going to have to see the scandalous tapes first.
(Cut to thirty minutes later. Roday, Oliver, Madeline and Aedesh were gathered around the laptop watching something and Roday closes the laptop)
RODAY: Okay, we've seen everything we needed to see.
MADELINE: No, we just watched an episode of Girls.
RODAY: Damnit, you're right. (Cut to thirty minutes later again. Roday shuts the laptop) Okay, now I've seen everything I've needed to see. And here are my suggestions. Madeline, wear long dresses, Oliver, wear Malcolm X glasses and lose Aedesh entirely.
AEDESH: What?
MADELINE: This is all fashion advice.
RODAY: Yeah, Madeline, by wearing long dresses you show that you're conservative and therefore you like Justice Thomas.
OLIVER: She wasn't even impersonating Thomas.
RODAY: But she hosted the minstrel show.
MADELINE: It wasn't a-what other advice do you have?
RODAY: Besides Aedesh wearing whiteface, I would say to deny everything and blame the sensationalist media.
OLIVER: That's exactly what we're trying to avoid!
RODAY: Okay, then apologize…sort of.
AEDESH: Sorry?
RODAY: Wrong! I'm sorry that you didn't hear me.
AEDESH: What?
RODAY: When you're apologizing just to placate people, you have to do a half-assed apology. "I'm sorry if anyone was offended by me eating that hooker." You're not apologizing for your actions; you're apologizing for THEIR actions. Oldest trick in the book.
OLIVER: …I don't see myself doing that. (Cut to Oliver, Madeline and Aedesh addressing several reporters outside their dormitory. Oliver is wearing Malcolm X glasses, Madeline is wearing a black pants suit and Aedesh a bright green shirt and pants)We were not trying to make light of Justice Thomas' race, but rather, his southern heritage and if we offended anyone in that process, then I do apologize.
MADELINE: I also apologize that certain people ruined my minstrel show with their antiquated stereotypes.
AEDESH: Menstrual show.
MADELINE: Yes, sorry, menstrual show.
REPORTER: Mr. Mulvaney, how have you been holding up since Duplicit, thoughts of suicide-wise?
OLIVER: What?
(The President of New England Institute of Technology Richard Gouse walks over)
PRESIDENT GOUSE: Hey! What's going on here? Reporters, if you have a question about the university, direct it towards my office! But for now, (in the tune of "Another Brick in the Wall" by Pink Floyd) REPORTERS! Leave these kids alone! (The reporters reluctantly walk away and President Gouse yells at them as they leave) IF YOU DON'T EAT YOUR MEAT, YOU CAN'T HAVE ANY PUDDING! HOW CAN YOU HAVE ANY PUDDING IF YOU DON'T EAT YOUR MEAT?!
MADELINE: Wow, thanks President Gouse, those media blood hounds were really going at us.
OLIVER: Yeah, thanks.
AEDESH: Thanks a lot, sir.
OLIVER: But wait, why did they go directly to us instead of asking you? And why didn't they go directly to Duncan, he went to them!
PRESIDENT GOUSE: It's because of Duplicit Oliver. The media loves a good fall from grace, and if you throw a little more cat nip out there, they'll pounce like it's a story about a missing white girl. Just ignore them, and like cats to the wind, they'll blow away. Because in the end, (back in the tune of "Another Brick in the Wall" by Pink Floyd) you're just another brick in the wall!
(He puts his hand on Oliver's shoulder and walks away. Cut to Ryan, Alan, Luther, Natasha, Faith, Cooper and the other two girls in the KDGM studio. Alan, Luther, Natasha, Faith, Cooper and the other two girls are talking to each other while Ryan is just on the computer. Mrs. Stem walks in with Alan's independent project)
MRS. STEM: The camera work was crap, it was boring. You got a fifty.
(Mrs. Stem gives a stunned Alan the flash drive and walks out of the studio. Everybody looks at Alan in shock and Alan gets up, walks into the a room of the studio that can be seen through windows and angrily throws the flash drive in the corner)
(Alan walks out of the studio with his hands on his face. He then removes them. Ryan walks over to the main group)
RYAN: Dude, that's rough.
NATASHA: Seriously, what the fuck?
ALAN: I don't know, she just-when she's mad she just takes it out on you and I hate that I talk about her like we've been married for forty years, but-
RYAN: That's how she is.
ALAN: Exactly, thank you! She just takes out anger on people!
COOPER: She isn't ever tactful.
ALAN: I know, she just pisses me the fuck off sometimes.
RYAN: She's made me cry in the bathroom at least thrice. One time she told me to go to the bathroom in the middle of me pitching an idea; it's like, how rude!
LUTHER: Yeah, why are teachers allowed to be assholes to their students but we can never be assholes back?
FAITH: She doesn't get how hard a lot of the stuff we do is because she doesn't know how to do half of the shit that we do!
RYAN: Oh my God, that is so true! She probably thinks Adobe premiere is a new way to build a clay hut, it's like-
(They all laugh. The camera slowly pans out as their convivial chatter and mutual catharsis becomes unintelligible. Fade to black)
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text:
Addons for SeaMonkeyThere are many addons for SeaMonkey, and many Firefox addons can also work in SeaMonkey. There is a site that has some Firefox addons modified for SeaMokey:
Anyway, I decided to build-in some addons for the Woof live-CD, ones that are really essential. Namely, Zombiekeys and Adblock.
Zombiekeys is really handy, it enables you to type accented characters very easily on a plain-English keyboard, or probably any keyboard. The key combinations are a Microsoft standard:
Adblock, well, you know what that's for! As my Internet connection is painfully slow, this is essential for me, and sure does make a difference. It also helps with my very low monthly limit (1GB).
I'm not using Adblock Plus, as I recall back last year when I compared them, Adblock is much smaller but still does a good job.
I've made them into PETs for the purpose of building in Woof Unleashed, and they are quite small, Zombiekeys is 9.5KB and Adblock is 71KB. Note that although I created these specifically for SeaMonkey, and such that they are already installed when the system is built, and they have files in /usr/lib/seamonkey, this could probably easily be fixed to work with Firefox.
One thing about Zombiekeys though, not all key combinations work. Maybe there is some conflict with JWM key handling. Also, Zombiekeys does not work in Composer.
I may add one or two more, as long as they're small.
Comments:Posted on 26 Jan 2009, 17:58 by pakt
Another essential addon
Flash ads in web pages are real CPU hogs (not to mention the extra download). I have found Flashblock to work well in Firefox to block these. Flashblock replaces the Flash objects with a button you can click to view them. Also, you can right-click on the button to get more choices.
Posted on 26 Jan 2009, 19:26 by happypuppy
Essential addons
'NoScript' and 'Duplicate Tab' are the most essential.
NoScript can block not only Flash,but many other plugins as well.
Posted on 26 Jan 2009, 19:39 by happypuppy
SeaMonkey needs a skin as well
SeaMonkey also needs a new theme.The default one is terrible.
Ithe best one for Linux users is 'Mostly Crystal' by CatThief. Amazing theme. It makes the browser experience a whole lot better.
Download the latest version from the author's homepage:
Posted on 26 Jan 2009, 22:53 by kirk
You might want to consider User Agent Switcher as well. It's athttp://xsidebar.mozdev.org/modifiedmisc.html as well. It let's Seamonkey masquerade as another browser, handy for web sites that only except Internet Explorer. It's very small too, 26kb download.
Posted on 27 Jan 2009, 3:23 by inged
SeaMonkey look and feel
If SeaMonkey 'looks' more like Firefox, less people will complain about it... letting a bookmark pointing to the SeaMonkey addons can diminish the complains about the browser.
Posted on 27 Jan 2009, 5:42 by happypuppy
user agent switcher
+1 for the User Agent Switcher.Extremely useful.
Posted on 27 Jan 2009, 6:45 by rarsa
Flash block is indispensable
I second the use of Flashblock.
It is actually just a CSS that hides flash unless you click on the icon.
Posted on 27 Jan 2009, 6:51 by Leon
SeaGnome theme
I'm using it with these changes in /root/.mozilla/default/r3y1skkw.slt/chrome/userChrome.css file:
/* http://www.murga-linux.com/puppy/viewtopic.php?t=35956&sid=950ee38fc389e76268f969d141f52aa6 */
/* make all toolbars the same size */
/* address bar is still larger than others */
toolbarbutton {
padding: 0px 8px !important;
border: 0px !important;
height: 24px !important; /* default size for normal toolbars -row hight with icons in toolbar*/
Posted on 27 Jan 2009, 10:15 by Raffy
A post about Flashblock (and singing :)
Posted on 27 Jan 2009, 14:55 by ttuuxxx
Hi Barry, I've been spending days trying to compile Seamonkey or Firefox on 4.12, 4.2 etc and always getting the same errors
Also are you going to upload Seamonkey, Composer: 7592KB. We could use it on 4.2. But even better would be telling me how to get around this error. I've recompiled Gtk2, Pixman, Pango etc and nothing. Please help, I'm using the same compiling code as you used in 4.11
../../dist/lib/libgkconcvs_s.a(nsCanvasRenderingContext2D.o): In function `nsCanvasRenderingContext2D::Destroy()':
nsCanvasRenderingContext2D.cpp:(.text+0x20c6): undefined reference to `XFreePixmap'
../../dist/lib/libgkconcvs_s.a(nsCanvasRenderingContext2D.o): In function `nsCanvasRenderingContext2D::SetDimensions(int, int)':
nsCanvasRenderingContext2D.cpp:(.text+0x5b16): undefined reference to `XRenderFindStandardFormat'
nsCanvasRenderingContext2D.cpp:(.text+0x5b39): undefined reference to `XListPixmapFormats'
nsCanvasRenderingContext2D.cpp:(.text+0x5b75): undefined reference to `XFree'
nsCanvasRenderingContext2D.cpp:(.text+0x5bad): undefined reference to `XCreatePixmap'
collect2: ld returned 1 exit status
gmake[3]: *** [libgklayout.so] Error 1
gmake[3]: Leaving directory `/root/mozilla/layout/build'
gmake[2]: *** [libs] Error 2
gmake[2]: Leaving directory `/root/mozilla/layout'
gmake[1]: *** [tier_9] Error 2
gmake[1]: Leaving directory `/root/mozilla'
make: *** [default] Error 2
Posted on 28 Jan 2009, 6:31 by PaulBx1
Leave 'em out
I'm more of the opinion that users should add whatever add-ons they want, rather than having it done for them. This is particularly so when Seamonkey is so opaque as to what add-ons you have, and because it is not trivial to remove them (and maybe can't be done at all if they are on the CD). Why? Because I'm not entirely pleased with the add-ons I have tried. I think it's possible they have caused some problems for me. Not sure, but I still don't want them forced on me.
Posted on 28 Jan 2009, 7:01 by BarryK
Compiling SeaMonkey
Someone should go and berate the SeaMonkey developers, as it won't compile without a little patch provided by T2. This problem has been there for ages, since the start of the 1.1 series I think. Go to t2-project.org and find the page on SeaMonkey and there is the patch you can download.
The file is gtk2-x11-libs.patch.
# cd mozilla
# patch -p1 < ../gtk2-x11-libs.patch
I don't know if that will fix it for you, but most likely it will as the patch fixes some undefined references.
Posted on 9 Feb 2009, 22:54 by ttuuxxx
Print Preview Fix Seamonkey 1 Series
Hi Barry
When I compiled Seamonkey I figured out how to fix the print preview issue, Well I was trying different things to see if I could get it going, well one thing worked :) ok this is what you do
delete the file located
once you delete that file reset seamonkey and click on the print preview, it opens up and shows you what it would look like printed. Just like it should.

subset: commoncrawl


text:
Horses are great from ten feet away and with Grandpa nearby. Oliver's first visit to the state fair one day short of his first birthday. / Maureen Smith / Special to the Statesman Journal
Maureen Smith's photo of a young boy visiting a horse with his grandpa at the Oregon State is our 2013 State Fair Click! winner. Smith will receive a $50 Amazon gift card. You can see all the submissions in the gallery above.


text:
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The term "rational use," as applied to fishing rights in Antarctic waters, has been misused by certain countries, an analysis by a team of researchers has ...
read more
UK Opt-out System for Organ Donation Is Well Intentioned but Misguided, Say Experts
Oct. 20, 2015
As Wales prepares to become the first country of the United Kingdom to introduce an opt-out system for organ donation, a doctor says support for such a system 'is well intentioned but ...
read more
New Study Explores Gender Bias in Academic Hiring
Oct. 20, 2015
When all else is equal between highly qualified candidates for entry-level faculty positions, professors in academic science overwhelmingly prefer women over men, researchers previously found in ...
read more
Successful Intervention Boosts Gender Diversity of STEM Faculty
Oct. 14, 2015
Using a three-step intervention derived from self-determination theory, an interdisciplinary team of researchers has demonstrated a potential means of substantially increasing gender diversity in ...
read more
New Research Shows How to Make Effective Political Arguments, Sociologist Says
Oct. 12, 2015
In today's American politics, it might seem impossible to craft effective political messages that reach across the aisle on hot-button issues like same-sex marriage, national health insurance ...
read more
High HPV Prevalence Found in Subset of Peruvian Men
Oct. 5, 2015
A few years ago, a researcher assembled a team of scientists in Lima, Peru. The result of their work is the first study in that country to report human papillomavirus (HPV) infection in men who have ...
read more
Experts Call for the Responsible Use of New Genome Editing Techniques
Sep. 29, 2015
More efficient bacteria and yeasts for use in fuel and drug production, new strategies to combat antibiotic-resistant germs, and innovative plant breeding methods -- new molecular biology techniques ...
read more
Data Scientist Develops Novel Health ROI to Optimize Biomedical Resource Allocations
Sep. 28, 2015
Public and private entities that fund biomedical research face difficult choices on how to allocate a finite level of capital, and scientists often take risks in selecting research topics multiple ...
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Legal Drinking Age of 18 Tied to High School Dropout Rate
Sep. 28, 2015
Although there have been calls to lower the legal drinking age from 21, a new study raises the possibility that it could have the unintended effect of boosting the high school dropout ...
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In-Flight Medical Emergencies: What Doctors and Travelers Must Know
Sep. 24, 2015
A new article offers guidance for both healthcare providers and other travelers about how to handle mid-air medical emergencies. This important advice could save your ...
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'Immune Camouflage' May Explain H7N9 Influenza Vaccine Failure
Sep. 24, 2015
The avian influenza A (H7N9) virus has been a major concern since the first outbreak in China in 2013. Due to its high rate of lethality and pandemic potential, H7N9 vaccine development has become a ...
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Possible Contributor to the Virulence of the 1918 Flu Pandemic Discovered
Sep. 22, 2015
A novel mechanism for one 1918 flu virus protein has been discovered that may help explain the virulence of that unusually deadly pandemic. That outbreak killed 50 million to 100 million ...
read more
Catching the 'Black Sheep' Among Bankers
Sep. 21, 2015
Unethical conduct by employees of financial institutions can usually be traced back to improper incentives in the internal corporate structure, according to research. In addition to selecting ...
read more
US Defense Agencies Increase Investment in Federal Synthetic Biology Research
Sep. 16, 2015
In the United States, the Defense Department and its Defense Advanced Research Projects Agency funds much of the US government's research in synthetic biology, with less than 1 percent of total ...
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Friday, November 20, 2015
Marked decline in retailer compliance after enactment of NYC's Tobacco 21 law
Wednesday, November 11, 2015
Affordable Care Act architect: What is role of radiology in transformed health care system?
Monday, November 9, 2015
End 'stem cell tourism,' experts urge
Thursday, November 5, 2015
Researchers urge lifting of NIH funding restrictions on chimeric research
Monday, November 2, 2015
New policies would expand pediatric lung transplant access, study shows
Monday, October 26, 2015
How game design can reduce stereotypes, social biases
Wednesday, October 21, 2015
Fish story: Analysts see nations' misuse of 'rational use' when it comes to fishing rights
Tuesday, October 20, 2015
UK opt-out system for organ donation is well intentioned but misguided, say experts
New study explores gender bias in academic hiring
Wednesday, October 14, 2015
Successful intervention boosts gender diversity of STEM faculty
Monday, October 12, 2015
New research shows how to make effective political arguments, sociologist says
Monday, October 5, 2015
High HPV prevalence found in subset of Peruvian men
Tuesday, September 29, 2015
Experts call for the responsible use of new genome editing techniques
Monday, September 28, 2015
Data scientist develops novel health ROI to optimize biomedical resource allocations
Legal drinking age of 18 tied to high school dropout rate
Thursday, September 24, 2015
In-flight medical emergencies: What doctors and travelers must know
'Immune camouflage' may explain H7N9 influenza vaccine failure
Tuesday, September 22, 2015
Possible contributor to the virulence of the 1918 flu pandemic discovered
Monday, September 21, 2015
Catching the 'black sheep' among bankers
Wednesday, September 16, 2015
US Defense agencies increase investment in federal synthetic biology research
Choice of college major influences lifetime earnings more than simply getting a degree
Monday, September 14, 2015
Does social capital explain community-level differences in organ donor designation?
Thursday, September 10, 2015
Human genome editing research is essential, experts say
Drunk, distracted drivers are double dangers
Tuesday, September 8, 2015
Blood, teeth samples accurately predict a criminal's age
Monday, August 31, 2015
Forget cash: Plastic is the new sign of criminal activity
Wednesday, August 19, 2015
Debate: Would judicial consent for assisted dying protect vulnerable people?
Tuesday, August 18, 2015
Unequal healthcare funding provokes 'moral disgust,' pioneering brain scan research shows
Monday, August 17, 2015
IRS rules to protect patients from health care financial burdens are inadequate, need legal reform, law professor says
Wednesday, August 12, 2015
Male doctors are more likely to have legal action taken against them
Thursday, August 6, 2015
Patient-funded trials may do more harm than good, ethicists warn
Wednesday, August 5, 2015
New survey on Americans' views on law enforcement, violence, and race
Wednesday, July 29, 2015
Bioethicists call for end to 'pay-to-play' clinical research
Tuesday, July 28, 2015
Study finds unexpected biases against teen girls' leadership
Few science museums use the word 'agriculture' to teach
Monday, July 27, 2015
Ethics of tomorrow? Should androids have the right to have children?
Wednesday, July 22, 2015
Readiness of America's biology teachers questioned
Monday, July 20, 2015
Achieving equity in higher education
Thursday, July 16, 2015
Better DNA hair analysis for catching criminals
Wednesday, July 15, 2015
Pre-college science programs lead to more science majors
Monday, July 13, 2015
Robotics and the law: When software can harm you
Wednesday, July 8, 2015
Patent filings by women have risen fastest in academia, finds study
Tuesday, June 30, 2015
Careers outside of academia richly rewarding for PhD physicists
Medical tourism: Implications for patients, health systems
Monday, June 29, 2015
Stuck on you: Research shows fingerprint accuracy stays the same over time
After Ebola, understanding health care needs among rural Liberians
Friday, June 26, 2015
Women in developed world still face many barriers to early abortion
Thursday, June 25, 2015
New way of understanding police authority, power
Friday, June 19, 2015
Laws needed against intrusive face recognition tech applied to online images, experts say
Thursday, June 18, 2015
Tiger-spray DNA shown as valuable conservation tool
Monday, June 15, 2015
Law enforcement officers should be authorized to administer naloxone
Will your self-driving car be programmed to kill you if it means saving more strangers?
Tuesday, June 9, 2015
Roadside bomb blasts may cause more brain damage than previously recognized
Monday, June 1, 2015
Online gambling would benefit from better regulation
Political science study debunks idea of public opinion backlash
Virtually no effect of state policies on organ donation, transplantation
Thursday, May 28, 2015
Wide variability in organ donation rates across United States: Midwest leads nation in highest rates of lifesaving donations
Wednesday, May 27, 2015
Congressional action needed to optimize regulation of genomic tests
How should Norway legalize egg donation?
Wednesday, May 20, 2015
The fear of dying in misery in a hospital is driving the assisted dying debate, says medical ethics expert
Wednesday, May 13, 2015
What's the forecast? Cutting off the supply of psychoactive substances
Tuesday, May 12, 2015
Using decisional bias as an implicit measure of moral judgment
Bathroom Graffiti: From phallic doodles and insults to humor, satire and supportive messages
Monday, May 11, 2015
Ethicists propose solution for US organ shortage crisis
Thursday, May 7, 2015
How to build a new global health framework
Film music captivates us
Friday, May 1, 2015
US clinics avoiding government oversight of 'stem cell' treatments
Tuesday, April 28, 2015
Should voting be compulsory or should we have a right not to vote?
Friday, April 24, 2015
To improve STEM diversity, fix higher education, scholar says
Ethics training for future doctors needs updating, say medical educators
Thursday, April 23, 2015
Crime scene discovery: Scientist separates the DNA of identical twins
Tuesday, April 21, 2015
High-level commission focuses on law's power to significantly improve world's health
Protocol developed for preserving forensic evidence after a terrorist attack
Monday, April 20, 2015
Most Americans say medical marijuana shouldn't be used by kids or in front of kids, legal or not
Friday, April 17, 2015
Experts warn Ebola epidemic could return with a vengeance unless lessons about medical trials are learned
Thursday, April 16, 2015
For men, online generosity is a competition
Wednesday, April 15, 2015
Oxycodone overdose deaths drop 25 percent after launch of Prescgram
Tuesday, April 14, 2015
Finding new drugs for infectious diseases: Selecting the right tool for the job
Healthcare professionals must recognize importance of human rights to improve healthcare for women, experts say
New WHO statement on public reporting of clinical trial results
Monday, April 13, 2015
Recruiting participants for research: Simple explanations, queries from doctors are best
Monday, April 6, 2015
Teams with a critical mass of women lets them 'lean in' and aim for science careers
Winning women: Fielding more female candidates helps political parties gain votes
Stop complaining about the moral decline of western society, expert says
Thursday, April 2, 2015
One-third of college STEM majors switch fields by graduation
Tuesday, March 31, 2015
Acute injured kidneys can be considered for transplant
Innovative strategies needed to address US transplant organ shortage
Monday, March 30, 2015
Social media study of Pinterest to clinical practice effectiveness
Thursday, March 26, 2015
Agricultural waste could be used as biofuel
Tuesday, March 24, 2015
The challenges for anthropologists when they're the expert in the courtroom
Friday, March 13, 2015
E-cigarettes can be regulated now without more research, expert says
Thursday, March 12, 2015
Social status has impact on overall health of mammals
Wednesday, March 11, 2015
Is US immigration policy 'STEMming' innovation?
Media portray unrealistic timelines for stem cell therapies
Two new flu strains do not yet easily infect humans
Monday, March 9, 2015
Teens, adults hazy on Washington marijuana law, study shows
Thursday, March 5, 2015
Seven strategies to advance women in science
Tuesday, March 3, 2015
Outcomes of lung transplantations since implementation of need-based allocation system
Monday, March 2, 2015
Despite federal law, some insurance exchange plans offer unequal coverage for mental health
Republicans trust science -- except when it comes to health insurance and gay adoption
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text:
Natalia Starr
my girlfriend was late for work, I convinced her to do a quick blowjob! But the fun doesn't stop there, you don't want to miss the awesome fuck we had in the bedroom.
I Know That Girl
94 %
146388 views - Nov 14, 2012
Natalia shows off her hot pink pussy with her POV video. She's a smoking blonde babe that can't stop touching her sweet tits and ass.
She's A Freak
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41966 views - Nov 11, 2012
Natalia is making a little video of herself. Hot POV action of her playing with her curvy butt and her tight little pussy
She's A Freak
91 %
37260 views - Nov 01, 2012


text:
Alex Guild of Lawrence competed in snowshoes for Team USA in the 2013 Special Olympics World Winter Games in South Korea, which went from Jan. 29 to Feb. 5. Guild, 22, won a silver medal in the 5-kilometer race and a bronze medal in the 1,600-meter race.
- Filed Under
Alex Guild will be returning to his homeland with more than the snowshoes and other belongings he took to East Asia two weeks ago.
The 22-year-old Lawrence resident has a couple prized possessions to show family, friends, coworkers and other supporters.
Guild ran to silver and bronze medals in snowshoe racing events in the 2013 Special Olympics World Winter Games. ...


text:
|View single post by ashbel
|Posted: Mon Mar 31st, 2008 08:37 pm
|I agree with David. There is no reason why scanning a copyrighted book is OK I don't care whether it is for personal use or not. The authors of these books put their talents, hours of research and analytical skills into creating a book. They need to be compensated for their efforts. It is hard enough for historians to make a profit on a book the way it is. Allowing unauthorized copying of their work makes it even more difficult.
I also don't buy the argument that since you are a taxpayer in a state you are entitled to the unauthorized use of a state university database. All state services are regulated by rules and laws that make them viable. Obviously, you could not have unlimited access and use of all state facilities at all times just because you are a taxpayer. We would have chaos.
As a tuition paying parent of three recent graduates of state universities I can assure you your taxes do not cover university expenses. I don't accept the argument that it is OK because a friend allowed you to use their access code of their own free will. If you expect to use the service, pay the price.


text:
If you are in Cape Town and have not yet visited 1890 Sushi House and Grill, then you are seriously missing out. Some like to keep it a secret just to make sure they will always have a table. Capetonians all agree that this is the best and most delicious sushi in town with a grill to match.
One does not even notice the simple and slightly bare décor because you are just too busy socialising over the fresh sushi – or fresh turn-table sushi – and large portions. The most difficult choice is will I only order sushi or take on one of the mouth-watering chicken, duck, pork, beef or seafood dishes.
You will be sure to spot Charlie, the owner, ensuring that all his patrons are happy and catching up with his regulars.
Be sure to book a table at this very popular and reasonably priced restaurant in Observatory, Cape Town. They are open from Monday to Saturday for lunch and dinner. The best sushi in Cape Town!
Oozing sophistication and simplicity, 27 Saint Louis satisfies sophisticated palates with simple yet refined cuisine.
Leaning towards European gastronomy, diners enjoy a harmonious blend of flavours. The menu serves a gastronomic bistro menu complimenting the authentic atmosphere and serenity.
Indulge in the warmth and simplicity of 27 Saint Louis in Port Louis, Mauritius.
A Taste of Asia is found on the bustling Lower Main Street in Observatory. The restaurant has been said to be great value for money and one of the best places to enjoy sushi. The fusion of Asian meals includes cuisine from Japan, China, Korea and Thailand.
The restaurant is an old house with the rooms offering guests seating. Every room has a fireplace which creates a fantastic cosy and romantic atmosphere and much-needed warmth in winter. All this coupled with friendly and efficient service.
A Taste of Asia is well known for its buffet specials and it is advisable to book in advance. Look out for their live band nights. Bring your wine and have a hearty time.
Street parking is available and the best place to look is the down the one-way just before the restaurant. The restaurant is open for lunch and dinner. Lunch hours are from Tuesday to Friday, from 12 pm to 3 pm. Dinner is served every day from 6 pm to 10:30 pm.
Please call for further information.
This vibrant Afro setting invites a welcoming African hospitality infused with tastes from around the globe enrobed in ethic murals and plush seating.
With over 100 dishes from Africa, Middle East and Asia to choose from including a large selection of starters and salads, diners can immerse the palate in global cuisine with tantalising creations of oxtail, samp and beans, stir-fries, Moroccan pitas and traditional Durban curries.
Boasting over 12 different ice creams and array of cold deserts, A2A is a culinary dream garnished with seven island buffet stations including a complimentary bottomless soda fountain to cool off the palate.
This delicious buffet feast embraces a fresh and quality approach to dining with exceptional value for money for the whole family.
This is truly one of the best Lebanese Restaurants in town. Abdel Wahab's reputation is solid in the eyes of locals and tourists alike. Great food, a great atmosphere and great shisha is available here at reasonable prices.
Ever since its opening in Zamalek this Ramadan, Abdel Wahab has created quite the buzz around Cairo purely through word of mouth. This very successful Lebanese restaurant chain has branches in Dubai and Bahrain among others, and promises authentic Lebanese cuisine in a charmingly traditional setting.
Although there's no clear sign marking the restaurant's entrance on Abou El Feda Street, the fluorescent green numbers 33 hang over the entrance: to your left is Ramadan shisha place Tofaha, to your right is Abdel Wahab.
Al Fassia has been offering traditional Moroccan cuisine since 1985. The restaurant embraces a romantic atmosphere coupled with professional service and gourmet dishes. Guests have the option of sipping drinks on the patio before being seated at their cosy table. Guests are able to experience fine dining in the heart of Guéliz.
More than just a place to have a great meal, A'la Turka incorporates art, music and culture into the mix, offering a truly memorable and enjoyable dining experience.
Enjoy delectable, exotic Turkish cuisine as you travel deep into the heart of the land. Choose from an exciting menu of freshly-prepared dishes while you listen to music and take in the wonderfully appointed decor.
Strategic lighting creates a relaxing ambience and showcases the antiques and art adorning the hand-painted walls. Be entertained by talented belly dancers as you feast.
A dining experience like no other, A'la Turka is an intriguing place to while away some time.
Located in the Tygervalley Waterfront, Asian Asia's prime lakeside location makes an ideal setting dining alfresco on the water's edge.
The interior remains cosy and intimate, perfect for a romantic dinner.
A variety of Asian food spills off the menu offering Chinese, Japanese and Thai with plenty of seafood and vegetarian options too.
Begin with a hot starter and selection of tempura, dim sum, spring rolls and soups.
Main course dishes range from chicken or seafood teppanyaki and classic Asian dishes such as sizzling beef on a hot plate and crispy duck, including seafood combos and myriad of noodle dishes.
Dine overlooking the lake or treat someone special to a romantic dinner at Asian Asia, Tigervalley.
This fine bistro restaurant boasts rare classic dishes reflecting various influences from around the globe.
Gracing an elegant ambience bursting with a fusion of flavours, Aubergine and Andreotti's offer bistro dining at its best.
The décor embraces a contemporary setting perfect for languid lunches and decadently elegant dinners.
A well known landmark and favourite meeting place for diners, Baglio's Café embraces delectable delights in the form of European style pizzas and ultimate Italian indulgence.
Casual yet chic, the ambiance is warm and classic Italian with a hint of cosmopolitan. The extensive menu is well catered for with complimenting local and international estate wines.
Situated on the corner of Nelson Mandela Square, diners experience quality value for money cuisine and the art of indulging at Baglio's Café.
Set within the trendy suburb of Green Point, Bamboo Asian Fusion offers a unique setting where diners indulge on succulent sushi off the bodies of naked women.
The interior adds an air of sophistication and seductiveness to the experience, with low ambient lighting in the form of paper lanterns, floral designs, latticed screens and original bamboo flooring soothed by ambient house music.
If naked sushi exceeds your appetite, then try the delicious dishes off the menu starting with appetizers such as Prawn Toast, Spring Rolls, Dumplings and Soups. Mains include Asian Green or Red Curry, Seared Salmon, Galangai Fillet and a selection of Wok Dishes.
Conclude your meal with a heavenly dessert.
Set in scenic Stellenbosch and fusing both modern and traditional Cape cuisines, Barouche Restaurant is a must-try dining experience.Barouche provides delightful dining whatever the weather, with a terrace overlooking vineyards for warm summer days or a warm and welcoming inside area for the colder wintertime.Serving the finest of South African as well as international cuisine and using the freshest seasonal ingredients, Barouche is a wonderfully versatile and accommodating place to dine.
Experience authentic Eastern flavours in this bustling and vibey restaurant.
The interior is beautifully decorated with luxuriously soft, comfortable seats and quaint little cruet sets all over. The lighting is soft and creates an atmosphere conducive to kicking back and relaxing.
This traditional Asian eatery offers a wide variety of items on its menu. The house speciality is the lamb - slow-cooked fall-off-the-bone meat that melts in your mouth and is served on a cast-iron plate that brings out a real sizzle. Other recommended dishes are the sweet and sour chicken and the crispy duck, both beautifully prepared and infused with authentic flavours. Throw in a side of vegetable noodles and you've got a meal fit for a king. For vegetarians there are various alternatives, including the amazing bean tofu - a must-try.
Beijing Orchard is fully licensed and diners can enjoy a good bottle of wine at a reasonable price. All in all, the flavours of the East blend beautifully here.
Offering great variety and quality, Billy G looks upon the bustling casino floor of Monte Casino and honours with the freshest prepared ingredient and dishes that change on a daily basis.
Boasting Mediterranean, African and Asian in the form of vegetarian delicacies, curries, pasta, mouth-watering salads and top quality meat, Billy G seduces with a buffet heaven and diversity of flavours.
Honour the lifelong contributions of SA cuisine for lunch or dinner at this food lover's paradise in Fourways, Monte Casino
Located in the trendy suburb of Greenside, boasting a fresh new look, Bite entices with firm favourites and new tastes blended into the exciting new menu.
Try the seared tuna on wasabi mash and salsa verde, or the line fish steamed in lemongrass, garlic and herbs followed by unique deserts that excite and conclude the dining experience.
Enjoy champagne by the glass or peruse the extensive wine list to complimenting wines to your meal.
Consistent standards ensure this establishment retains a loyal following and sets the mood for a memorable dining experience.


text:
Toshiba intros low-cost bright DLP projector
updated 09:55 am EDT, Tue October 2, 2007
Toshiba X3000AU
Toshiba today rolled out the TLP-X3000AU, a new projector designed for presenters and home theaters with less than ideal viewing environments. Though relatively affordable at $1,199, the DLP system achieves 3,000 lumens of brightness; this makes it 50 percent brighter than the average projector, helping its image quality in daylight and similarly bright conditions. In spite of the brighness, Toshiba's most recent color enhancer hardware reportedly keeps up a 400:1 contrast ratio.
Keeping the projector secure is also an unusual focus of the X3000AU. A panel with an automatic password is detachable from the top of the projector; without it, the projector is useless to thieves who might want to use the device themselves, Toshiba says. The projector's native output produces a computer-friendly 1024x768 resolution when attached by VGA but produces a rescaled widescreen picture from any HD source up to 1080i. RCA and S-video inputs are also standard on the unit, which weighs 6.2 pounds and should be available today.


text:
D.P. Wire Report 10/20/11 6:34p.m.
The Disassociated Press is pleased to announce the end of it's production strike, causing last week's NFL Flop 10 poll to be missed, along with three other news articles that have unfortunately had to be scrubbed, including an in depth analysis of the recent pot calling the kettle black situation compliment paid to Norvell Turner by the Ryan coach who does not think his defense practices against 7 receivers better than Calvin Johnson (Rex for those of you who were lost at the word Norvell) by senior writer N. Formation. We will shortly bring you the missing Week 5 NFL Flop 10 Poll followed by the riveting Week 6 NFL Flop 10 poll. CEO of the Disassociated Press who will only go on record under the alias BuccinGator, had this to say. "After reviewing the hacking scandal that engulfed News Corp and 'News of the World,' several members of our production staff became concerned over how we were able to get so many breaking stories, such as the dismissal of Joey Cora from the White Sox. As such, we had to assure them that all of our information came from legal, credible sources such as the National Enquirer's website. Only then did they agree to return to be able to bring you the breaking news stories you care about." But, the strike was not without it's consequences. D.P. reader The Muffin Man is quoted, "Yeah, I was POed. Look, I base some of my NFL pool picks around who are the teams in the D.P. Flop 10, specifically, who not to choose. Not having that critical information caused me to only get 10 correct, 2 less than the weekly winner. Consider me a former D.P. reader." In a completely unrelated story, senior D.P. editor Lindsay Lohan will unfortunately be taking some time off due to legal issues not stemming from our sources.
D.P. Archives:
10/6/11 Predictions of the 4 Horsemen of the Apocalypse
10/4/11 D.P. NFL Week 4 Flop 10 Poll
10/01/11 The 2011 MLB Disassociated Team of the Year Award
9/27/11 D.P. Week 3 NFL Flop 10 Poll
9/27/11 "@JoeyCora, you're fired! #pinkslip"
9/26/11 Gopher Engineering Students To Fix Things Again


text:
ST. PETERSBURG, Fla. (AP) - David Price outpitched CC Sabathia and the Tampa Bay Rays rallied Saturday night to beat the New York Yankees 4-2 to hang on to first place in the AL East.
Evan Longoria snapped a 2-2 tie with a sixth-inning RBI single and added a solo homer in the eighth to help reigning AL Cy Young winner Price (8-5) win his fifth consecutive decision and improve to 7-1 since a stint on the disabled list for a left triceps strain.
Sabathia (11-11) took a 2-0 lead into the sixth before giving up three quick runs the Rays used to remain in first place, percentage points ahead of the Boston Red Sox.
The fourth-place Yankees have dropped the first two games of a weekend series after winning five straight as part of a surge that carried them back into playoff contention.
(Copyright 2013 The Associated Press. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten or redistributed.)


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Jul 31, 2013; Philadelphia, PA, USA; Philadelphia Eagles wide receiver Riley Cooper (14) addresses the media concerning an internet video at the Eagles NovaCare Complex. Mandatory Credit: Howard Smith-USA TODAY Sports ORG XMIT: USATSI-139402 ORIG FILE ID: 20130731_hcs_sy4_002.JPG / Howard Smith, USA TODAY Sports
View the full article on USATODAY.com.
Copyright 2015 USATODAY.com
Read the original story: Eagles should just let Riley Cooper go


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Hot and Spicy Chicken Chili.
- Filed Under
It's hard to believe that this column starts my 10th year writing "Sweet & Savory." Time does go fast! I have organized two three-ring binders - with "sweet" recipes in one and "savory" recipes in the other.
I still have files spilling over with more recipes collected through the years that I need to sort. My sister found even more stacks of recipes that were our mother's, and I need to go through those special recipes.
It is funny, though, how one always goes back to the tried and true recipes that you know will turn into delicious fare. I'm in the process of making lists for Christmas baking. My list ...


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Welcome to Something of The Night merchandise. On Thursday 6th November 2003 the Rt Hon Michael Howard QC MP was officially named the new leader of the British Conservative Party. We launched this venture to welcome him to his new job. We wanted to look back over his past career as the driving force behind the Poll Tax and sometime adversary of Anne Widdecombe, who famously remarked that Howard had "something of the night about him".
On Friday 7th October 2005 he resigned after a crushing defeat for his party in the British General Election.
Since then we have supplied dozens of Something of the Night mugs and T-shirts - and the odd cheeky Howard thong!
The contenders to replace Michael are David Davis (a rags-to-riches hardman), David Cameron (a nice young man), Dr Liam Fox (his head can turn 360 degrees like an owl and he can light cigarettes with his eyes) and a cigar-lover called Ken Clarke (fat and jolly). See here for more details. news.bbc.co.uk/1/shared/spl/hi/uk_politics/05/con_contenders/html/default.stm
Please view the products on this site while you are here - hopefully you will want to take something away with you as a souvenir of a very special man before he is lost in the mists of time.
For other British politics merchandise, see our sister store www.cafepress.com/britishpolitics!


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I sincerely hope that you have enjoyed summer! Personally, I can testify that this was one of the best summers I have experienced. When I travel around the Northern Lights Council, I always get asked "is summer a slow time for you? Or the opposite "are you able to slow down over the summer?" My response is always the fact that Scouting never takes time off! Perhaps you have seen this in the packs, troops, teams, crews or posts?
One of the accomplishments I am most proud of is the fact that I made it out to Camp Wilderness Boy Scout camp each week! Some weeks my visit was short but others I was able to take time to talk with Scouts and adults about what makes Scouting fun. Thank you to all of you who took time to talk with me and share your ideas. We should all be proud of Camp Wilderness and the great staff that delivers awesome program. We made some big decisions this year; one of them was adding a new pilot ATV program that is sure to be a hit for years to come!
We cannot forget Heart Butte Scout Reservation located on Lake Tschida that hosted a quality National Youth Leadership Training and Webelos Camp. Also, we have invested many resources in Big 4 Camp near Minot with new equipment this summer as well. Plus, throughout the summer we've had a lot of Scouts who have experienced 'Leave No Trace' camping at Tom Brantner Memorial Camp in Clay County, Minnesota.
As I write this I am finalizing another quarter of traveling to all ten geographic service districts that make up our quality Northern Lights Council. I value the time to visit your area and hearing your success stories!
Please take the time to help us welcome over 1,500 new families that came into our larger Scouting families in September. Because of great volunteer and staff teams, we are in the middle of one of the best fall recruitment drives in recent memory. Thank you!
Let me finish by telling you about the popcorn sale. Another council accomplishment to be proud of is the fact that our popcorn retail prices are not going up this year AND unit commissions and prizes are not decreasing, where else with inflation can we say that? Thank you in advance for a wonderful sale. And, for your information, the popcorn sale for session one is going on through October 22, 2013.
Like I said Scouting is year round and our communication never ends either. Check out our Face book page at "Northern Lights Council," our Twitter feed at @nlcbsa, our eNewsletter and our website. Personally, feel free to connect with me on Twitter at @BSATravis or through my blog. Also, please check out my most recent video blog. Thanks again for your partnership and all you do for Scouting across the Northern Lights Council.
See you soon,
Travis Christopher
Scout Executive/CEO
Northern Lights Council, BSA
Serving more than 20,000 youth in Cub Scouts, Boy Scouts, Venturing, Exploring and Learning for Life across the State of North Dakota, 18 counties in NW Minnesota and 2 counties each in South Dakota and Montana. A United Way Agency.
Scouting Builds: Leadership, Character, Achievement, Service to Others and Appreciation for the Outdoors. Be a Scout! Re-connect and re-engage with Scouting at www.BSAALUMNI.org


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My cat made me do it!
3 comments:
Oooh I love Greys too! That cat is huge, but I'm sure he is very cuddly :) I like the look of you Main Idea packet!ReplyDelete
Make sure you give George a tummy scratch from me.... I miss having a cat, such personalities.
Mrs Poultney's Ponderings
Main idea is something our students struggle with too. Can't wait to see the finished packet.ReplyDelete
L-o-v-e your main idea unit...I just might have to snag that on Monday :) I just wanted to tell you how much I enjoy your blog. I have it emailed to me so that I don't miss a day :) I just started to blog and am so inspired to be a better teacher. I bought your Polar Express Unit along with your Common Core Math & ELA checklists last week. I'm so happy with them so thank you for helping me to become an even better teacher. Have a good weekend!ReplyDelete
Stephanie Ann
Sparkling in Third Grade