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Demystifying Music Theory Part 2Comments Off on Demystifying Music Theory Part 2
June 11, 2013 by admin
I've heard some musicians refer to a concept known as the Circle of 5ths (or even the Circle of 4ths)…what is it and how is it applied?
What exactly are modes?
I know what major and minor chords are, but what are Sus, Dominant, and 7th chords all about?
DEEPER CONNECTIONS – If you read my introduction to music theory, then you should realize that nothing in music (scales, chords, etc.) can function in isolation. All concepts of music theory are connected together in order to form a logical and coherent system. We can take this a step further and explore the relationships between the 12 notes of western music. The names for each of the 12 musical notes (starting with 'A') are as follows:
A, A#, B, C, C#, D, D#, E, F, F#, G, G# (# = sharp)
As mentioned in my introduction to theory, if you play each note in consecutive order, then you have run through the chromatic scale. But the chromatic scale is a bit too random and unpleasant sounding to make any strong connections between these 12 notes. So, as with the intervalic system, we will enlist the help of the major scale.
If we play the major scale (starting with 'C'), we get the following notes:
Notice anything interesting? There are no sharp (#) notes when the major scale is being played in the key of 'C'. The important concept to understand here is how I use the term 'key'. In my introduction to theory, I explain that the tonal center of a scale is the focal point of resolution (the 1 note of the interval formula). When discussing the major scale's tonal center, we can refer to it as a 'key'. This term gets tossed around a lot these days and is often misused. For example, if a guitarist wants to improvise with a live band at a bar, he would probably ask, "What key do you want to play in?" One of the players in the band might reply, "Let's do it in A minor blues." Using the term 'key' in this way is definitely more succinct than asking "What tonal center do you want to play in?" However, according to some strict music theorists, this is a misuse of the term.
Only the tonal centers of the Major Scale are referred to as a 'key'. This brings us to the introduction of what is known as the Circle (or Cycle) of 5ths.
CIRCLE OF 5THS – Don't be intimidated by the image you see above. It is simply a system based upon the relationships I alluded to earlier that are found between the 12 different 'tonal centers' of the Major Scale (Just to clarify, there are only 7 notes in the Major Scale, but because there are 12 notes in Western Music, each note can play the role of 'tonal center' in a given situation)
So let's look again at the notes of the Major Scale in the key of 'C'
As mentioned, there are no sharp (#) notes in the Major Scale when played in the key of 'C'. Every other 'key' will have either a certain amount of sharp notes or flat (b) notes (I'll address flat notes a little later). So the key of 'C' is unique in that it contains only natural notes. Natural notes are notes without a sharp or flat symbol attached to them. The symbol for a natural note looks like this:
You won't see the natural symbol as often as you'll see the sharp or flat symbols, but it will pop up when accidentals are notated (more about accidentals later).
So our starting point in the Circle of 5ths is the key of 'C'. What happens when we select the 5th note in the 'C' Major Scale to be our next tonal center? We get the Major Scale played in the key of 'G'. The notes of the 'G' Major Scale are:
The key of 'C' and the key of 'G' share all of the same notes in common, except for one. And this new note just so happens to be sharp. Now let's take the 5th note of the 'G' Major Scale and use that as our next tonal center. This will be the Major Scale in the key of 'D' and its notes are:
You might already be noticing the pattern here. The main tenet of the Circle of 5ths system is: (starting with the Key of 'C') by using the 5th note of the scale to build your next key, two important results will be consistently produced;
1.) The new 'key' will always contain the same notes as the previous key, except for one new note.
2.) This new note will always be a non-natural note (sharp or flat).
Visually, the Circle of 5ths can be thought of as a 'clock' which produces the aforementioned results by moving clockwise, starting from the top, through the Circle.
There are a few more interesting patterns that arise (the new note being introduced is always the Major 7th interval of that scale) but the two that I outlined above are at the foundation of the system. At this point, you might be asking yourself these two questions; When and how do the flat notes come into play? How do I actually apply this system to my playing?
The primary usage of this system is for when a person is reading sheet music (written music notation). Instead of notating every individual occurrence of a sharp or flat note, the amount of sharp/flat notes found within the given key is simply notated at the beginning of the piece.
If you look at the Circle of 5ths image, you will notice by each key that there is a small picture of the treble clef with a certain amount of sharps (#) or flats (b) next to it. This is known as the key signature. It indicates to the music reader that a pre-established set of notes will be either sharp or flat in a given piece. If you want to be proficient at sight reading then you would need to memorize both the number of sharp/flat notes within each key and the specific notes that are sharp or flat.
To illustrate this example visually, I have displayed the key signatures for both the key of C and the key of G respectively:
In the first image, the lack of a sharp or flat symbol next to the Treble Clef indicates that the subsequent piece will be played in the key of C, where there are no instances of non-natural notes.
In the second image, where you see one sharp symbol next to the Treble Clef, the piece would be played in the key of G, where the F# is the one non-natural note.
This pattern holds true for the entire Circle of 5ths system. Now, what if you are reading some sheet music and you notice that an individual note has a sharp or flat symbol next to it?
These notes are called accidentals. An accidental is any note which is not apart of the family of notes found within a particular key signature.
For example, if I wrote a song in the key of 'G' then every note that I use should come from the following options:
In this case, there is no need to notate a sharp symbol every time an F note is played in my song, because it is already assumed to be an F# by virtue of the key signature.
This is also known as being diatonic, meaning "within the key".
But if I want to add some dissonance in my song, then I might throw in a G#. This note would need to be accompanied by a sharp symbol to show the reader that it is an accidental.
FLAT NOTES AND THE CIRCLE OF 4THS – Now let's discuss what role the flat (b) notes play in this system. There are two additional rules of the Circle that need to be looked at:
1.) If playing diatonically (no accidentals) then the same letter note cannot be notated in two different ways within the same key signature. (F and F# for example)
2.) Sharp and flat notes cannot be mixed together in the same key signature
These don't seem like hard rules to follow, until you arrive at the key of F#. If I played the Major Scale, with F# being my tonal center, the following notes are produced:
By containing both an F and F#, there's obviously a conflict within this key. So let's try it this way:
Well this version follows the rules, but only when you introduce an E#. But is E# really a note? Sort of. You will see it notated in some books, but it is uncommon. The relationship between these two notes (F and E#) is what's known as enharmonic.
Similar to the concept of compound intervals (which I mention in my introduction to theory) this is, again, an issue of semantics. An F and an E# are enharmonically equivalent, meaning they're the same exact musical notes but are notated differently depending on the circumstances. In order to avoid notating an E# while still adhering to the rules, we need to utilize the flat notes.
Every sharp note (plus 'B' and 'E') has an enharmonically equivalent flat note. I'll list them below:
A sharp = B flat
B = C flat
C sharp = D flat
D sharp = E flat
E = F flat (rarely notated)
F sharp = G flat
G sharp = A flat
Let's try and list the notes of an F# Major Scale one last time, but now we will refer to it as a 'G flat' Major Scale, and all previous instances of sharp notes will be re-notated to their corresponding flat notes:
Gb, Ab, Bb, Cb, Db, Eb, F
This seems to work a little better. The flat notes are added to each successive key in almost the same way the sharps are added, except that we start at the top and move 'counterclockwise' through the Circle by selecting the fourth note from the scale to build the next key.
We can call the 'flat' side the Circle of 4ths.
If we look at the Major Scale in the key of 'F' (the 11 o'clock position in the image) we get the following notes:
F, G, A, Bb, C, D, E
If we take the 4th note and build our next key, we have the Major Scale in the key of Bb which consists of the following notes:
Bb, C, D, Eb, F, G, A
So there you have it. The key of 'C' is the starting point and, depending on which direction you travel, you can refer to it as either the Circle of 5ths (clockwise) or the Circle of 4ths (counterclockwise).
RELATIVE MINOR – When you look at the Circle of 5ths image, you might also be wondering what role the lowercase green letters inside the circle play? Well these green letters indicate what the Circle of 5ths would look like if we applied the system to the Minor Scale.
Earlier I said that, technically speaking, you should only use the 'key' terminology when discussing the Major Scale. This is still true, but in today's musical climate, the Minor Scale is just as important as the Major Scale. Saying something like, "let's play this in the key of E minor" is considered widely acceptable. But the interesting part is the relationship between the red letters on the outside of the circle (the Major keys) and the lowercase green letters on the inside of the circle (the minor keys).
Let's look again at the notes of the Major Scale in the key of 'C' :
Now let's see what happens when we play those same seven notes, but use the 6th note in the scale (A) as our new tonal center. Instead of it sounding like a happy sounding Major Scale in the key of 'A', we end up producing the Minor Scale. This is called the relative minor.
There is an important difference that needs to be emphasized between the Circle of 5ths system and the Relative Minor concept; In the Circle of 5ths, we take the 5th note in the scale and intentionally build a Major Scale with that 5th note being the new tonal center. This means that we can introduce new notes into the picture. However, with the relative minor, we are using the 6th note of the Major Scale to be the new tonal center but maintaining the same seven notes. Remember, for any two scales to have a 'relative' relationship, they must contain the same exact notes, while only shifting the tonal center.
In fact, every key of the Major Scale has a relative minor scale hiding within it. So the green letters found inside the circle indicate the unique relative minor 'key' for each corresponding red letter on the outside of the circle.
Why stop there? Why not turn the 2nd note of the Major Scale into the new tonal center? Or the 3rd note for that matter? This concept can be applied to all seven notes of a given Major Scale and each tonal center creates a different 'mood' and sound. This is the concept of modes.
MODES – Modes are often overcomplicated and shrouded in mystery and confusion. Many players are told that modes are "the secret weapons for any lead guitarist". While there's definitely truth to that statement, modes are basically just scales. There's tons of scales out there, and modes are no different. What makes them noteworthy is their relationship and connection to the 'parent scale' otherwise known as the good old Major Scale.
A cliche statement that you'll often hear is that the Major Scale is "the mother of all scales". This doesn't mean that it's the coolest sounding scale, or that you NEED to use it in order to be a great guitarist. It just means that, when you look at how the most common scales in modern music are connected back to the Major Scale, it seems to play the role of a 'parental' figure. Some of the most popular scales used in music can be directly linked back to the Major Scale.
I'll borrow an analogy I used in my previous blog on theory to explain the 'subordinate' role that modes play in relation to the Major Scale. I compared the constant nature of an interval formula for a particular scale to that of a sports team; Traveling from city to city, where the stadium (the tonal center) can change but the distance of the field from end zone to end zone (the interval formula) will remain the same.
When talking about modes, you can slightly alter this analogy to say a certain team is on a '6 game road trip' to different cities. Each city's stadium (each mode) has a different character, different weather (major, minor, or diminished) which contributes to how the game is played in that stadium. But we all know where the home team is from if we get lost (the Major Scale).
So, to reiterate, when we turn each individual note of the Major Scale into the tonal center we get seven unique sounding scales or modes (including the Major Scale). The names for these modes have ancient Greek origins and are as follows:
Ionian Mode (same as the Major Scale)
Dorian Mode (when the 2nd note becomes the tonal center)
Phrygian Mode (when the 3rd note becomes the tonal center)
Lydian Mode (when the 4th note becomes the tonal center)
Mixolydian Mode (when the 5th note becomes the tonal center)
Aeolian Mode (when the 6th note becomes the tonal center, same as the Minor Scale)
Locrian Mode (when the 7th note becomes the tonal center)
Each mode has its own 'sound' and character, but they can all (except for Locrian) be put into two basic categories; Major or Minor
Let's look at the intervalic formula for each mode to see why (Remember that the tonal center is always the '1' note in the interval formula. This is why, for example, the Dorian mode doesn't start with a '2', even though it is the 2nd note of the 'parent' Major Scale) :
Ionian = 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7 (Major)
Dorian = 1, 2, b3, 4, 5, 6, b7 (Minor)
Phrygian = 1, b2, b3, 4, 5, b6, b7 (Minor)
Lydian = 1, 2, 3, #4, 5, 6, 7 (Major)
Mixolydian = 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, b7 (Major)
Aeolian = 1, 2, b3, 4, 5, b6, b7 (Minor)
Locrian = 1, b2, b3, 4, b5, b6, b7 (Diminished)
In the introduction to theory, I discuss how the 'flat 3rd' is indicative of a minor sounding scale or chord. Based on this logic, we can see that three of the modes are more minor sounding, three modes are major sounding, and the Locrian mode is diminished (because of the 'flat 5th' or 'diminished 5th'). You might also notice how the modal structure is identical to the Major Chord Scale (which I cover in the introduction) :
1st Triad Major chord (1,3,5) = Ionian Mode
2nd Triad Minor chord (1,b3,5) = Dorian Mode
3rd Triad Minor chord (1,b3,5) = Phrygian Mode
4th Triad Major chord (1,3,5) = Lydian Mode
5th Triad Major chord (1,3,5) = Mixolydian Mode
6th Triad Minor chord (1,b3,5) = Aeolian Mode
7th Triad Diminished chord (1,b3,b5) = Locrian Mode
This further illustrates how nothing in music theory can function in isolation. All concepts are connected.
MODAL USAGE AND APPLICATION – In all honesty, you can use these modes and their unique melodic content in any creative way that you'd like. However, there is a logical way to use them in order to weave the tapestry of a piece through different musical landscapes.
For example, if I was writing a song in the key of 'C' Major but wanted to write a 'dark' sounding guitar solo, then my best option would be to shift the quality of the chord progression to a 'minor' sound. Transitions between two different sections can sometimes be the most difficult part of composing a song. Let's say you have two catchy ideas, but one is 'happier' sounding while the other is 'darker' sounding. How can you smoothly transition between these two sections? Should you just treat the two ideas as separate songs to avoid mixing them together? Well, you could do that, but if you felt strongly about marrying the two ideas then you could try transitioning from the Major key to its 'relative minor' or one of the other minor modes (Dorian or Phrygian). Since none of the notes change (only the tonal center), this transition will sound very smooth, natural, and deliberate.
Another way would be to maintain the same tonal center (key of 'C' in this case) but to switch from 'C' Major to its 'parallel minor'. The parallel minor in this case is 'C' minor. The main difference between relative vs. parallel is that any 'relative' change will adhere to the modal structure (the same family of notes as the parent scale). While a 'parallel' shift alters the notes and sound of the parent scale itself. This transition will sound a little more abrupt, but can be an effective way to deceive the listeners' expectations.
One more option you have when changing the key of the parent scale is to follow the Circle of 5ths (or 4ths). Changing the key in this way is known as modulation (although this term is sometimes used when any change of the tonal center occurs). If you're in the key of 'C' then a transition to either the key of 'F' or 'G' can yield pleasing results in regards to the transition. The main reason for this is because there's only one note of a difference between 'C' Major and 'F' or 'G' Major. Even better, this one note is a mere half-step distance (distance of 1 fret) from either key (In 'C' Major, the 'F' note transitions to F# when modulated to 'G' Major. And the 'B' note transitions down to Bb when 'C' Major is modulated to 'F' Major)
And, of course, you can always change the tonal center at random without any rhyme or reason. When it comes to writing your own music, you don't have to follow the rules. Check out my blog on Music Theory's Role in Songwriting to explore this topic further.
Well I think it's time that we rap up this section on the Circle of 5ths and Modes. Both topics have the potential to be dissected and discussed ad nauseam. However, there's enough information here which can enable you to become reasonably proficient in both areas.
SUS, DOMINANT, and 7th CHORDS – In my previous post on theory, I explain the concept of triads and how they are the foundation for all chords. I also discuss how there are four basic types of triads; Major, minor, augmented, and diminished. However, there are a few more chord 'qualities' which should be addressed.
SUS CHORDS – All triads are comprised of the 1st, 3rd, and 5th notes of a given scale. And we also know that the 3rd note helps define the sound or 'quality' of the triad (whether it's Major or minor). So what would happen if we omitted or 'suspended' (Sus = suspended) the 3rd note and replaced it with something else? Well there are only two other options in-between the 1st and 5th notes; the 2nd or the 4th.
A chord which suspends the 3rd and replaces it with the 2nd note in the scale is called a Sus2 chord, while a Sus4 chord utilizes the 4th note. Sus chords have a more 'open' sound which can be harder to categorize in terms of their mood and quality. Another important point to keep in mind is that the 2nd and 4th notes have to be natural to the Major scale if you're going to use them for a Sus chord. If you're playing over a Phrygian modal sound, then a Sus2 chord won't be applicable (but a Sus4 will work).
It is important to note that, in the Jazz world, Sus chords do not always omit the 3rd note completely. Instead, jazz musicians will sometimes play the 3rd note an octave higher so that there's reasonable separation between the 2nd/4th and the 3rd.
7th CHORDS – Depending on how comfortable you are with the intervalic system, you might already have an idea of what 7th chords are all about. If we took each triad found within the Major Chord Scale and added the 7th note, then we have a formula and roadmap for using 7th chords in a given progression:
Ionian – 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7 = Major 7th Chord (1,3,5,7)
Dorian – 1, 2, b3, 4, 5, 6, b7 = Minor 7th Chord (1,b3,5,b7)
Phrygian – 1, b2, b3, 4, 5, b6, b7 = Minor 7th Chord (1,b3,5,b7)
Lydian – 1, 2, 3, #4, 5, 6, 7 = Major 7th Chord (1,3,5,7)
Mixolydian- 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, b7 = Dom 7th Chord (1,3,5,b7)
Aeolian – 1, 2, b3, 4, 5, b6, b7 = Minor 7th Chord (1,b3,5,b7)
Locrian – 1, b2, b3, 4, b5, b6, b7=Minor 7 b5 Chord (1,b3,b5,b7)
So if you wrote a strictly 'diatonic' chord progression in a Major key, then you could add the corresponding 7th note to any of the triad-based chords in an effort to spice things up a bit. That being said, you should still always use your ears to make sure the 7th chord is what you want in your song. 7th chords might not be appropriate for every musical context as they tend to have a 'jazzy' sound.
DOMINANT CHORDS – Now, there is a new term in the list of 7th chords above which needs to be explained. The fifth chord down from the top is labeled "Dom 7th Chord". This is short for Dominant 7th Chord. Dominant chords are interesting because they share both major and minor qualities. A dominant chord will always be built upon a major triad (1,3,5) with an added 'flat 7th' on top. This gives it a kind of 'bluesy' sound.
CONCLUSION – I hope you've learned a lot from this article and feel free to share it with others and use it as a 'music theory cheat sheet' of sorts. Admittedly, there is much more that can be explored in the world of music theory that I have not touched upon. But this has been my attempt at presenting you with the 'essentials' in a practical and straightforward way. If you have questions about any of the material or you simply want to dig deeper into music theory, please contact me and I'd be glad to help you out!
Category Uncategorized | Tags: 7th Chords, Accidentals, Circle of 4ths, Circle of 5ths, Dominant Chords, E sharp, Key Signature, Modes, Natural Notes, Parallel Minor, Relative Minor, Sus Chords, Tonal Center
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subset: commoncrawl


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In-State Tournament Awaits Bulldogs At Northern Iowa Fall Invitational
The Drake women's tennis squad continues its fall campaign this weekend traveling to Cedar Falls, Iowa, to compete in the 12-team Northern Iowa Fall Invitational.
The three-day event running Friday (Sept. 27) through Sunday (Sept. 29) features players from Bradley, Drake, Green Bay, Illinois State, Iowa State, Milwaukee, Northern Iowa, Saint Louis, St. Catherine's, South Dakota, Upper Iowa and Western Illinois.
Competition gets underway at 9:00 a.m. each day.
Sophomore Maddie Johnson (Onalaska, Wis.) captured a come-from-behind 0-6, 6-4, 10-8 triumph over Minnesota's Maja Vujic to lead the efforts of Drake on the final day of the Gopher Invitational on Sunday (Sept. 22).
Johnson's victory in the 'Gold' flight championship match avenged a pair of losses Vujic dealt sophomores Mariel Ante (Riverside, Calif.) and Jordan Eggleston (LaQuinta, Calif.) earlier in the draw.
In consolation play in the bracket, Ante and Eggleston came up short of registering wins in the third- and fifth-place matches, respectively. Anastasia Tripolskaya of Wisconsin bested Ante, 6-3, 6-1, while Minnesota's Kendall Heitzner rallied to edge Eggleston, 3-6, 6-2, 12-10.
Junior Nell Boyd (Arlington Heights, Ill.) won her 'M' flight consolation contest versus Sydney Rider of Wisconsin, 7-5, 7-5
In doubles, the tandem of Ante and Boyd claimed the 'Maroon' flight title with a default victory over Kylie Haviland/Jeke Stroobant of Northern Iowa.
In consolation play, the duo of Eggleston and Johnson bested Diana Davitaia and Maria Paula Ribero from Eastern Michigan, 8-2, to garner a fifth-place showing.
In its third competition of its 2012 fall campaign, Drake traveled to Wichita, Kan., for the Missouri Valley Conference Individuals.
In singles, Klavdija Rebol (Kranj, Slovenia) came up short in her bid to capture the title at No. 1 as Melanie Delsart of Southern Illinois posted a 6-0, 7-6 victory.
In the No. 6 flight, Maddie Johnson went the distance in her match with Wichita State's Montse Blasco Fernandez before suffering a 6-7 (8), 6-3, 6-4 setback in the championship tilt.
In doubles, the tandem of Mariel Ante and Johnson came up short in their bid for a title in the No. 3 flight, dropping an 8-4 decision versus Satjaporn Moahajaroenkul and Fernandez of Wichita State.
Drake returns seven letterwinners from a squad that posted a 13-10 ledger last spring, including a 5-2 second-place showing in the Missouri Valley Conference.
Jordan Eggleston led Drake with 47 combined singles/doubles victories, while the Bulldogs also garnered combined win totals of 37, 37, 36, 30, 26 and 11 from Nell Boyd, Maddie Johnson, Klavdija Rebol, Mariel Ante, Lea Kozulic (Varazdin, Croatia) and Amanda Dick (Kenosha, Wis.).
Boyd and Eggleston each registered a team-best 24 singles victories a year ago, while Eggleston and Rebol posted 23 and 22 doubles triumphs, respectively.
• Mariel Ante, Jordan Eggleston and Maddie Johnson have each posted a team-leading six singles victories this fall to pace the Bulldogs. Ante and Johnson are directing Drake with six doubles triumphs apiece.
• Maddie Johnson has won her last four singles matches.
• The Bulldogs own three singles and three doubles titles this fall.
• Klavdija Rebol registered her 50th career singles win for Drake last season at Bradley. She is Drake's active leader with 52 career singles triumphs.
The Bulldogs own a 29-9 mark in the Roger Knapp Tennis Center over the last three seasons in dual matches.
Sadhaf Pervez, an assistant coach with eight years collegiate coaching experience, including the 2012-13 campaign at Princeton, is in her first year as head women's tennis coach at Drake after being named to the position on July 9, 2013.
Pervez came to Drake after spending the 2012-13 season as an assistant coach at Princeton. She helped mentor three Tigers to All-Ivy League accolades this spring, including Lindsay Graff, who was tabbed a first-team All-Ivy selection in singles.
Freshman Amanda Muliawan captured the Intercollegiate Tennis Association (ITA) Northeast Regional singles crown last fall under Pervez's tutelage, becoming the first-ever Princeton women's tennis player to do so and by virtue of the triumph earn a berth in the ITA National Indoor Championships.
Pervez also contributed to the signing of the nation's No. 7 recruiting class as chosen by TennisRecruiting.net.
She previously served from 2005-11 as an assistant coach at her alma mater, Ohio State, as well as a one-year stint at Nebraska.
During her tenure at Ohio State, she helped the Buckeyes reach the NCAA Tournament three times (2008, 2009 and 2010), including earning a 4-1 victory over DePaul in the first round of the 2010 NCAA Tournament.
The Buckeyes established a school record for victories as well as achieving a school-record No. 17 ITA ranking during the 2010 campaign.
During her playing career at Ohio State from 1999-2003, she accumulated 190 combined singles/double victories en route to earning first-team All-Big Ten accolades as a senior in 2003.
The Buckeyes qualified for the NCAA Tournament during each of her four seasons in Columbus and posted the school's first-ever tournament victory, 5-3, over the University of Miami in 2000.
She is third and fifth, respectively, in Buckeye' women's tennis history in singles (99) and doubles (91) wins.
A native of Warren, New Jersey, Pervez graduated from The Ohio State University in 2004 with a bachelor's degree in business marketing.
The Bulldogs visit St. Louis, Mo., for the Missouri Valley Conference Individuals (Oct. 4-6).


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Grade: C
It was 1982 when Glenn Close first played Albert Nobbs, a woman in 19th century Ireland who, thanks to a short 'do and vaguely androgynous features, has passed herself off as a man, in order to reap the then-vocational benefits of the gender. Preserving this performance on film has been her goal since. There are three things sad about this. One, that it took Close three decades to get it mounted. Two, that Close, while semi-credible as a man, is stuck with a frankly boring role. And three, that after all this time and effort (Close also co-produced and co-wrote the script, and wrote the lyrics to the credits song sung by Sinéad O'Connor), the end product wound up being utterly stolen by someone doing the same thing Close was doing, only better.
Though Close, luckily, has attracted most of the press and awards, the film is at its sprightliest whenever it has in its midst Janet McTeer. The mostly-forgotten Oscar Nominee for Tumbleweeds plays Hubert Page, another woman who's also successfully passed herself off as a man. While Nobbs labors for the bourgeoisie, hoping to save up enough money to purchase a tobacconist's shop of her very own, Page already basically has it figured out, with a home and a doting wife. Moreover, Page is charismatic—gleefully profane and comfortably masculine, able to pass herself off as the lesser sex less with appearances than with attitude.
Close's Nobbs, on the other hand, is stiff and opaque, constantly wearing an expression that makes Buster Keaton's great stoneface look like Jim Carrey. We can't even tell if her pursuit of lowly maid (Mia Wasikowska) is out of infatuation or the mere practical need of a ladywife. Close's rigid mien is, of course, intentional—Nobbs is supposed to never feel comfortable in her own skin, not even during an interlude where she runs across a beach in a dress before symbolically falling. But the only thing interesting about Nobbs is that she's pretending to be the other gender, and the filmmakers assume that's enough. The film's arrival in the middle of Downton Abbey Fever, meanwhile, is excellent, but the background of servanthood never springs to life, not even with a handful of dalliances with a horny Brendan Gleeson.
With exceptions, male cross-dressing is at least intended, however successfully, as an easy laugh. (Or in Jack Lemmon's and Dustin Hoffman's cases, an actual good one.) For whatever reason, hilarity doesn't automatically arise when the cross-dressing goes the other way.
Philadelphia's Jewish and Asian American film fests start soon
Impossibly charismatic Michael Fassbender soars in "Steve Jobs"
111 films in 11 days: The Philadelphia Film Festival
"Pan" deserves the hook
Matt Damon delivers in "The Martian"
Walking Dead's Josh McDermitt: 'Oh, crap, here it comes'
"Everest" like a nature documentary that turns into a horror movie
Shyamalan's latest visit to twist-ending-ville is good until it's not


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November 29, 2015
NEW YORK (AP) - People magazine has named Gwyneth Paltrow as the World's Most Beautiful Woman for 2013.
The 40-year-old actress tops the magazine's annual list of the "World's Most Beautiful," announced Wednesday.
Commenting on her selection, Paltrow says: "Around the house, I'm in jeans and a T-shirt. I don't really wear makeup."
She credits her workout routine for keeping her looking young and feeling strong.
Paltrow is married to Coldplay rocker Chris Martin. They have two children, Apple, 8, and Moses, 7.
Click Here to access the online Public Inspection File
Viewers with disabilities can get assistance accessing this station's FCC Public Inspection File by contacting the station with the information listed below. Questions or concerns relating to the accessibility of the FCC's online public file system should be directed to the FCC at 888-225-5322, 888-835-5322 (TTY), or firstname.lastname@example.com.


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I found this forum trying to find out some information on my old Witcomb road bike that I purchased in 1976.
My son is rapidly outgrowing his bike so I dusted off the Witcomb and he'll be riding my Marin Redwoods for a while. Ironically, I purchased the Marin bike when I was living in Tokyo in the '90s. I walked into the local dealer and I had to have a Marin bike since I grew up here.
Moved back to San Anselmo in 2000 and happy to have some of the best riding in the US right outside my door-- road and mountain.
I do Macintosh consulting by trade, so if you have work for me, please contact me.


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Connor Shaw (knee) not practicing, status for Missouri unknown
South Carolina quarterback Connor Shaw will not need surgery after suffering a knee sprain in the loss to Tennessee, head coach Steve Spurrier said Sunday.
Spurrier addressed that status of Shaw, and several other banged up players from the 23-21 loss in Knoxville, on a teleconference. Shaw is apparently "walking around a little bit" with a knee brace but not practicing. No timetable has been sit for his return.
Starting defensive tackle Kelcy Quarles also sustained a knee sprain in the loss, and fellow defensive lineman Gerald Dixon Jr. has a sprained ankle. In the case of both players, the status for Missouri is unknown.
South Carolina's loss to Tennessee in Knoxville was one of several results that turned the SEC East upside down. The Gamecocks appeared to control their fate heading into the weekend, but now the matchup with undefeated Missouri will likely determine whether or not a trip to Atlanta is in the team's future.


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FLASH Runs Right Into The Friend Zone With A New Featurette Looking At Iris West
The official Facebook page for The Flash has unveiled the third featurette for the highly-anticipated CW series spinning out of Arrow. This time around neither S.T.A.R. Labs nor Barry Allen's new friends get the spotlight. This time Barry's relationship with Iris West (Candice Patton) is explored. Barry (Grant Gustin) grew up with Iris after his mother was murdered and his father was wrongly imprisoned, and it appears all those years together has planted him firmly into the friend zone. Part of the show's approach seems to involve the 'will they or won't they' aspect of Iris and Barry's relationship and how it could turn from familial bonds to steamy romance. Comic book readers know the ultimate fate of Iris/Barry, but the show will take quite a while to get there. It will get even more complicated when Eddie Thawne sets his sights on Iris, making a rather interesting love triangle. What do you think about the new featurette?
After a particle accelerator causes a freak storm, CSI Investigator Barry Allen is struck by lightning and falls into a coma. Months later he awakens with the power of super speed, granting him the ability to move through Central City like an unseen guardian angel. Though initially excited by his newfound powers, Barry is shocked to discover he is not the only "meta-human" who was created in the wake of the accelerator explosion — and not everyone is using their new powers for good. Barry partners with S.T.A.R. Labs and dedicates his life to protect the innocent. For now, only a few close friends and associates know that Barry is literally the fastest man alive, but it won't be long before the world learns what Barry Allen has become…The Flash.
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Mad Max Meets Star Wars, With Mutant Sex-Coaching [NSFW]
Ultra Warrior's opening monologue/montage is completely insane: four-breasted slave girls, a post-apocalyptic world run by armed "pimps, bohemians and sexual deviants," and mutant bandits who cut people in half. But it only gets worse in the 30 monologues that follow. »


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- Overview
- Specs
- Reviews
Louis Garneau Women's Eva Short Sleeve JerseyWhether you're a professional cyclist, amateur racer or a newcomer to the world of bicycling, you need a jersey that can perform at any level. That's where the Eva women's short sleeve jersey comes in. Fast-wicking fabric with UPF 50, strategic mesh inserts and 15" zipper keep you dry and comfortable while technical details like reflective accents, mini-light tab and easy-access pockets provide functional performance.
- Pro Cool fabric with UPF 50 uses small inner cell construction and Cool Plus fibers to enhance airflow, moisture-wicking and quick-drying action
- Strategically placed mesh inserts with UPF 20 provide excellent breathability, quick-drying performance and flexibility
- 15" invisible zipper provides generous ventilation
- Rounded collar for a stylish look
- Mini-light rubber tab on back accommodates a "blinkie" light
- Reflective logos and backside reflectors add visibility
- 3 angled back pockets; 1 pocket has an MP3 port
Louis Garneau Women's Eva Short Sleeve Jersey
- fabric:
- Body: 100% Polyester Cool Plus; Mesh: 85% Polyester/15% Spandex
- pockets:
- 3 back
- video:
- puF4SzwDxhY
- fit:
- Race/Form-Fit
- hem:
- Elastic
- sleeve:
- Raglan
- spf rating:
- Body: UPF 50; Mesh: UPF 20
- zipper:
- 15"
- rating:
- 3.5
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Black Friday Weekend Mega Sale: event available 11/24/15 – 11/29/15 at all Performance Bicycle Retail locations, online and by phone. Advertised category and/or brand savings taken off lowest marked price on all applicable items during the event period. All bikes priced as marked. Items labeled Door Busters are priced as marked and are excluded from advertised category and/or brand discounts. Door Busters item availability limited to stock on hand. Online, discount taken at checkout. Taxes, gift cards, Team Performance memberships/ renewals, Spin Doctor Services/Service Plans or shipping and handling on web/phone orders are not eligible to receive discounts. Some brand and/or item exclusions may apply to this promotion – visit Terms and Conditions for details. Discounts cannot be applied to previous purchases. Sorry, no rainchecks. In retail stores, colors, styles and select brand availability varies by location.


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Seeking Safety Support Group
We strive to provide integrated treatment of PTSD and substance abuse /unsafe coping through cognitive, behavioral, and interpersonal therapy that sets safety as a priority.
The group intends to work toward achieving emotional, mental, spiritual and physical safety by increasing safe coping skills and decreasing unsafe behaviors.
This drop-in group is designed for women 18 and over to learn safe coping options and information on how trauma, PTSD, substance use and other negative coping strategies are connected.


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Microsoft Corporation
Microsoft Certified Solution Developer
One Microsoft Way, Redmond WA 98052-6399
Demonstrate your expertise in developing leading-edge enterprise solutions by using the Microsoft .NET Framework 1.0 and 1.1. The Microsoft Certified Solution Developer (MCSD) credential validates your advanced skill set, demonstrating to customers and employers your ability to support their evolving IT needs.
Work Experience Required? YesOral or Written Exam Required? Yes This certification is related to Career and Technical Education Career Clusters. Read more about career clusters.


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Product Code: 39595
39" (990mm). Mirror polished stainless steel head for rust resistance and minimal soil adhesion. One-piece hardwood shaft, split to form a wishbone handle. Weatherproofed hardwood shaft for greater durabilty.
Blade W x H: 7" x 11.4" (178 x 290mm). Handle length: 28" (711mm).
|Blade Width
|178 mm
|Spear and Jackson
|Construction Material (Landscaping)
|Stainless Steel
|Handle Length
|711 mm
|Handle Type
|YD Handle
|Manufacturer Guarantee
|10 years
|Pack Size
|Product Type
|Traditional Digging Spade
|Total Product Weight
|1790 kg


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I have a Babylock Ellageo, the one that has the floppy drive in the side, I have a question about pressure foot tension.
When I embroider thick items (fluffy towels, fleece, etc) my foot comes down real close to the fabric. With thick items I need to use stablizers on top; but, they get caught by the foot and torn. Which is very frusterating. I have sprayed 505 spray on top and smashed down the top to get more space between the foot and the item. No luck. The foot gets caught and tears the stablizer to bits.
My question is: Is there a way to tighten or lift the foot for more clearance between the foot and the item? I have tried to embroidery with the foot in the upper position and not lowering it. But, That does not work either.
How have you all dealt with this issue? Or how did you correct? I get my machine serviced 2 times a year, due to I do use it alot. I brought this up to my dealer to have them deal with hit last time it was put in; but, they did not deal with or answer my question. Can I do this at home?
Thank you all in advance for all information. I hope I made myself clear.
Erica - I used to have this machine... I am trying to remember where the adjustment was located. Have you taken a look at the on-screen settings and adustments? There may be a setting that allows you to set the presser foot height on-screen.
If you have the manual, try looking up presser foot height to see if there is an adjustment identified. I wish I could remember more... good luck!
I have the brother ultra which is pretty much the same machine. I don't have any issues with this, Have you tried using more of the topper and machine basting? There are free basting frames online. I think mine were done by Reen at Embroidery Garden over at the Sew Forum free design section. I think someone else posted some over there but can't remember. Even if you are sticking the solvy down the foot can catch the edges and pull it into a wrinkle. You might also clean the bottom of the foot in case there is adhesive residue that is giving some drag. Problems can be so aggravating. I hope you find out what is going on. If it has just been serviced I would take a hooped up piece of terry and the solvy and have them see the result that you are getting.
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text:
2012 is in full effect — there's a robust selection of new music for you to pick from this week. Hear new albums from Matthew Dear, UK shoegazers Big Pink, and female singer-songwriters Cate Le Bon, Kathleen Edwards, and Ani DiFranco. Sample these fresh new tunes and many more in the New Music Tuesday playlist.
Playlist Notes
Matthew Dear - Headcage
Forward-thinking songwriter and DJ Matthew Dear prepares for his fifth studio album with Headcage, an EP that hints at Dear's sound experimentation.
Sleigh Bells - "Comeback Kid"
Noisy Brooklyn duo Sleigh Bells blew minds and speakers alike with their critic-approved first album. With their second album is due in February, "Comeback Kid" is the long-awaited first taste.
Deerhoof/David Bazan - Deerbazan
San Francisco art-pop quartet Deerhoof continue their collaborative single series with David Bazan. The single re-imagines Vs. Evil's "No One Asked to Dance" with Bazan at the vocal helm.
Van Halen - "Tattoo"
More than 30 years into their career, Van Halen is moments away from releasing the studio album, A Different Kind of Truth. Listen to "Tattoo" — their bombastic, bluesy first single.
School of Seven Bells - "Lafaye"
"Lafaye" is the reverb-heavy precedent to the dream-pop trio's third album.


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(208): View more from Idaho
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
Tap Here to view the Mobile Optimized TFLN
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
why are there goldfish crackers all over my bed?
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
awoke with 47 plastic lawn flamingos in my bed and on surrounding floor. explanation?
you said they were your minions of evil that protected you from ferrets.
I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
so the guy behind me in court for my DUI hearing got a DUI on a lawnmower at 1AM...he is my new hero
i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I'm in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
hey this is lauren, i have to type for jon because he's convinced the tongs he's holding are his real hands
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
My girlfriend went down on me and as she did she hummed the theme from star wars and pretended my dick was a lightsaber...I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
I asked a girl to buy her a drink, she had I have a boyfriend, so I said, well i have a goldfish, she said what? I replied, oh I'm sorry I thought we were talking about shit that doesnt matter.
he said he didn't have a condom.
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
Dear vodka that I hid in a water bottle in the backseat of Blairs car, I'm sorry that she gave you away to a man on side of the road with an over heated engine. I'm sure the car doesn't appreciate you as much as I would have.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
I woke up with dick mouth, a raw vagina, an empty bottle of vodka and the best man next to me. I also found my thong by the pool. Best.Wedding.Ever.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
she gave me a handjob in the middle of the night and my stomach growled so she walked out totally naked and came back 5 minutes later with two sandwiches. who the fuck says getting married is awful?
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
I just found little boats floating in my bathtub....they are made out of white castle boxes, condoms, pickles, and corks. All the wine we bought is being used as the "ocean"....clearly we didn't drink any of the wine.....but I don't remember doing this.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.


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Psychretary Beard: "We need more time. I'm very hopeful"
The Public Eye: Rearrest rate unchanged under California prison realignment
Brad Branan | Sacramento Bee
…The realignment plan enabled the state to reduce its prison population by 25,000 inmates and balance its cash-strapped budget. But so far it has disappointed advocates who had lofty hopes that counties would reduce California's notoriously high rate of inmates who commit new crimes soon after hitting the streets.
Parolees monitored by counties under realignment have been arrested for new crimes at the same rate as when the state supervised similar offenders, The Sacramento Bee found in an analysis of state data. Sixty percent of parolees released to counties from October 2011 through September 2012 were arrested for new offenses within 12 months of leaving prison, the same rate as a comparable population of parolees managed by the state the year before the law took effect…
The state's prisons chief, Jeffrey Beard, cautioned against early evaluations of realignment. No state has attempted a similar shift in correctional responsibilities, and counties are still coming up with programs after a little over two years, he said.
"We need more time," Beard said. "I'm very hopeful…"(Full text at Sacramento Bee)


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Looking for an alternative to arsenic-treated lumber? Finding the right recycled products for your construction project just got easier, thanks to a new classification system from the Healthy Building Network (HBN).
The organization, composed of green building professionals and environmental and health advocates, released the classification system in late June. Bill Walsh, national coordinator of HBN, says the new system judges lumber in three categories: materials used, amount of recycled content and potential for recycling in the future.
HBN classifies 38 brands of plastic lumber with the letters A through K. "A" products are considered the most environmentally preferable, and consumers are advised to avoid "I," "J" and "K." The 14 brands that received an "A" are: Ameriwood, BJM Industries, BreezeWood, Eco-Tech, Eco-Tuff, Enviro-Curb, Everlast, HDPElumber, Leisure Deck, MAXITUF, Orcaboard, Perma-Deck Advantage+, PlasTEAK and Select.
Walsh says HBN gives higher ranking to lumber containing a single plastic because materials composed of only one component are easier to recycle. Some plastic lumber products are 100-percent plastic while others are made from plastic mixed with wood, fiberglass or rubber.
Products made of polyethylene plastic also score high. This type of plastic contains fewer toxic chemicals than other plastics.
"It's pretty clear that polyethylene has less of an environmental impact and a greater potential of being recycled," Walsh says. "Using 100-percent post-consumer polyethylene is best for the environment."
Walsh says these classifications could help shape the plastic-lumber industry. "Currently, the industry is in expansion and consolidation mode. I think this is a great opportunity for the companies to take these factors into account."
For more on this new system, visit the Healthy Building Network.
MOTHER EARTH NEWS is the guide to living — as one reader stated — "with little money and abundant happiness." Every issue is an invaluable guide to leading a more sustainable life, covering ideas from fighting rising energy costs and protecting the environment to avoiding unnecessary spending on processed food. You'll find tips for slashing heating bills; growing fresh, natural produce at home; and more. MOTHER EARTH NEWS helps you cut costs without sacrificing modern luxuries.
At MOTHER EARTH NEWS, we are dedicated to conserving our planet's natural resources while helping you conserve your financial resources. That's why we want you to save money and trees by subscribing through our earth-friendly automatic renewal savings plan. By paying with a credit card, you save an additional $5 and get 6 issues of MOTHER EARTH NEWS for only $12.00 (USA only).
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Owning certain stocks can save you thousands
Join the NASDAQ Community today and get free, instant access to portfolios, stock ratings, real-time alerts, and more!
As of Nov. 27,
Mason Hawkins
of Tennessee-based Southeastern Asset Management, which is the
adviser to Longleaf Partners Funds, has reported a 10 percent
decrease in his stake of franchising company DineEquity Inc. (
), according to
GuruFocus Real Time Picks
Reducing more than 310,000 of his shares at an average price of
$62, this is Hawkins' fourth stake reduction of DineEquity since
acquiring the stock in the third quarter of 2008. Starting off
with about 3.2 million shares in the beginning of his holding
history, Hawkins now has a shareholding of 2,798,762.
DineEquity's stock price is close to its 10-year high, trading at
$63.06 this morning.
With a market cap of $1.14 billion, DineEquity is the parent
company of restaurant chains, IHOP and Applebee's Neighborhood
Grill and Bar. Based in California, DineEquity operates more than
3,500 restaurants in 18 countries, making it one of the largest
full-service restaurant companies in the world.
DineEquity has had consistent growth over the years, its value
shooting in a positive direction especially over the last five
years, with a revenue growth rate of 26.7 percent.
Hawkins, along with Southeastern Asset Management chief
investment officer, G. Staley Cates, recognized this value growth
in its third
quarter shareholder letter
released in October, stating:
"Many management teams have taken steps to remove their stocks'
discounts through spinning out divisions, selling all or portions
of their companies, and initiating, reinstating, or meaningfully
increasing dividends... In Small-Cap, DineEquity has sold the
last of its owned Applebees restaurants to become 99%
In its third quarter fiscal results, DineEquity reported to
decreasing its debt by $167.2 million, due to generating strong
free cash flow in the three months ending Sept. 30. Combining the
company's booming free cash flow with its reduction in expenses
and net proceeds, DineEquity was able to reduce its total debt by
$255.5 million in the first nine months of 2012.
Out of the 41 stocks in Hawkins' portfolio, the consumer services
sector is the second largest sector represented, right after the
financials sector. As of the end of the third quarter, the
portfolio is valued at $22.4 billion, with a quarter-over-quarter
turnover rate of 2 percent.
Before choosing investments, Hawkins places heavy emphasis on a
company's management and its ability to operate the business. His
firm's research especially focuses on four key areas:
The views and opinions expressed herein are the views and opinions of the author and do not necessarily reflect those of Nasdaq, Inc.
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Related Links
Knowledge Centre Archive
Economic Outlook: The Rally at Six Months
It has been a terrific run, with equity markets around the world recording a price gain of close to 20% over the past six months and the S&P 500 advancing more than 28% from its closing low on October 3. As is often the case, this breathtaking move to the upside had its genesis in a period of deep investor gloom. Back in late September and early October, there were many things spooking the financial markets: fears of recession in the U.S., the European debt crisis and the possibility of a hard landing for the Chinese economy, to name a few.
The question now is, "What comes next?" The economic and financial backdrop certainly has improved since the dark days of last autumn, but one can make the argument that the rally already reflects this improvement. Besides, new challenges are coming into view that will test investors and the resiliency of riskier assets in the months to come. In our opinion, the surge in stock prices has brought valuations back in line with the fundamentals. Instead of taking a contrarian stand as we did six months ago, we are more inclined to "go with the flow," maintaining a pro-cyclical investment stance until valuations become more worrisome, or the economic trends start to point toward another period of uncertainty and volatility. We will detail in this report some of the factors that investors should monitor as the rest of the year unfolds.
Download the complete commentary (PDF)
This material represents an assessment of the market environment at a specific point in time and is not intended to be a forecast of future events, or a guarantee of future results. This information is for educational purposes and should not be relied upon by the reader as research or investment advice regarding the funds or any stock in particular nor should it be construed as a recommendation to purchase or sell a security, including futures contracts. There is no assurance as of the date of this material that the securities mentioned remain in or out of the SEI Funds. There are risks involved with investing, including loss of principal. Diversification may not protect against market risk. There are other holdings which are not discussed that may have additional specific risks. In addition to the normal risks associated with investing, international investments may involve risk of capital loss from unfavourable fluctuation in currency values, from differences in generally accepted accounting principles or from economic or political instability in other nations. Emerging markets involve heightened risks related to the same factors, in addition to those associated with their relatively small size and lesser liquidity. Bonds and bond funds will decrease in value as interest rates rise.
This material may contain "forward-looking information" ("FLI") as such term is defined under applicable Canadian securities laws. FLI is disclosure regarding possible events, conditions or results of operations that is based on assumptions about future economic conditions and courses of action. FLI is subject to a variety of risks, uncertainties and other factors that could cause actual results to differ materially from expectations as expressed or implied in this material. FLI reflects current expectations with respect to current events and is not a guarantee of future performance. Any FLI that may be included or incorporated by reference in this material is presented solely for the purpose of conveying current anticipated expectations and may not be appropriate for any other purposes.
Commissions, trailing commissions, management fees and expenses all may be associated with mutual fund investments. Please read the prospectus before investing. Mutual funds are not guaranteed, their values change frequently and past performance may not be repeated. The information contained herein is for general information purposes only and is not intended to constitute legal, tax, accounting, securities, or investment advice, nor an opinion regarding the appropriateness of any investment. You should not act or rely on the information contained herein without obtaining specific legal, tax, accounting and investment advice from an investment professional.
This commentary has been provided by SEI Investments Management Corporation (SIMC), a U.S. affiliate of SEI Investments Canada Company. SIMC is not registered in any capacity with any Canadian regulator, nor is the author, and the information contained herein is for general information purposes only and is not intended to constitute legal, tax, accounting, securities, or investment advice, nor an opinion regarding the appropriateness of any investment. You should not act or rely on the information contained herein without obtaining specific legal, tax, accounting and investment advice from qualified professionals. Information contained herein that is based on external sources is believed to be reliable, but is not guaranteed by SEI, may be incomplete or may change without notice. SEI Investments Canada Company, a wholly owned subsidiary of SEI Investments Company, is the Manager of the SEI Funds in Canada.


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Detox Energy Salad
I was first introduced to a detox diet when I visited an awesome health and wellness retreat called Kamalaya that is situated in Koh Samui, Thailand. I did a 14 day program especially designed by Dr Karina Stewart to help cleanse the body and nourish the cells. At the end of my treatment – I felt amazing ! I was energised, rejuvenated and ready to take on the world. Basically the motto of a detox is:
A detox is a bit like an oil change for your car. It can help to re-boot and re-energise your system, eliminating toxins from the body and help to enhance weight loss and optimum health. A well-designed detox menu is hypoallergenic and low inflammatory, eliminating foods that could cause gastrointestinal upsets.
Food is most healing when it is close to its' original state and has the properties to heal and nourish. The Healthy Chef philosophy is a realistic and sensible approach to healthy eating that will last a lifetime. What I love about embarking on a detox diet is that after the program finishes, you can easily transition the wonderful foods and raw juices you are eating into your every day lifestyle. Detox to me is a bit like an intense training camp. I try and do one seasonally just to reset my body and healthy eating patterns and I also do occasional juice and smoothie cleanses over a weekend just to boost it along a bit.
Try to make small diet and lifestyle changes that will have positive outcomes to your health in the future. Enjoy the journey of healthy eating with balance, wisdom and moderation. " If you give your body the right environment and adopt healthy habits, you have the power to change your health in the future."
Why it's awesome !
The ingredients have been specifically chosen to detoxify, alkalinize and heal the body. The American Journal of Clinical Nutrition states that alkalising diets improve bone density and serum growth hormone concentrations, while acidic diets contribute to bone and muscle loss. The most nourishing alkalising foods are green foods such as leafy greens, green vegetables, spirulina and wheat grass; citrus fruits; raw nuts and seeds, cold-pressed olive oil, beans and legumes. Make sure to include plenty of alkalising foods in your diet every day and you will notice the difference in your overall health.
150 g mixed leafy greens (cos, butter lettuce, iceberg, rocket, spinach, micro greens etc)
1/2 avocado
sprinkle of pumpkin seeds
sprinkle of sunflower seeds
handful of raw or roasted walnuts
sprinkle of goji berries or pomegranate jewels
1 teaspoon ground flax seed (linseed)
Arrange the salad leaves into serving bowls.
Lay over the avocado and sprinkle over the seeds + goji berries.
Serve with your favourite dressing.
I love my simple lemon and olive oil dressing or a lush parsley and mint salsa verde. (see recipes)
Pump up the protein by serving with steamed with fish, organic egg or poached organic chicken.
Enhance detoxification by adding 1/2 raw grated or roasted beetroot.
Add a little crunch and goodness by adding a little roasted buckwheat.
Green Salsa Verde
1 bunch parsley leaves
1 bunch mint leaves
zest and juice from 1 lemon
cold pressed olive oil, flaxseed or walnut oil
Make the green dressing by combining all the ingredients into a high performance blender like a Vitamix and process until smooth. Season with a little fresh ground pepper. Pour a little over the salad just before eating and enjoy. Add a little splash of coconut water to aid mixing.
Lemon and olive oil dressing:
1 Tablespoon lemon juice
2 tablespoons cold pressed olive oil
black pepper
Combine dressing ingredients and pour over the salad.
Enjoy and feel nourished.


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NBC football analyst Tony Dungy, left, works with Dan Patrick during halftime of the 2010 Army/Notre Dame college football game at Yankee Stadium in New York. Dungy is waiting to see more from the 2013 Lions.
- Filed Under
Tony Dungy thinks your team stinks. I'd bet that makes you feel good. Misery loves company, right?
Turns out the former Super Bowl-winning coach is no different than the rest of you: Two games into the season, and he already has given up hope. Why else would he have said "same old Lions" last Sunday when talking about Arizona's come-from-behind win over Detroit?
Dungy grew up in Jackson. He recognizes the signs. He's tired of the turnovers and penalties and 3-yard slants when the Lions need 4 yards for a first down. ...


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Pak, India agree to boost bilateral trade
Islamabad. India and Pakistan have agreed to remove hurdles in bilateral trade and to increase trade and economic engagement. The decision to this effect was reached in a meeting of Pakistans Commerce Secretary Zafar Mehmood with his Indian counterpart Rahul Khullar during the 5th round of India-Pakistan talks on Commercial and Economic Co-operation held in Islamabad on 27-28 April. Both sides agreed that increase in trade and economic engagement would help not only in the mutual quest for national development, but also contribute to building trust between the two countries. The discussions were guided by the mutual desire to realize the full potential of bilateral trade. To facilitate this objective, they agreed to make efforts to create an enabling environment for trade on both sides. The two sides also agreed to encourage greater engagement between the private sectors of the two countries. During the meeting, the two sides agreed to build confidence, dispel misunderstandings and allay any misapprehensions. It is essential that governments in both countries support the business communities in promotion of bilateral trade. Further efforts would be made to make the bilateral trading environment more business friendly. Necessary outreach activities would be undertaken to bridge information gaps relating to the trade environment and economic opportunities. They also agreed to promote trade; both tariff and non-tariff barriers (NTBs) need to be reduced/removed. It was decided to establish a Working Group (WG) specifically dedicated to address and resolve clearly identified sector-specific barriers to trade. The WG would comprise technical experts and representatives of regulatory bodies directly concerned with the clearly identified barriers. The first meeting of the WG will be held by September 2011. The two sides appreciated the significant progress made in developing physical infrastructure for trade through the Wagah-Attari land route. Closer coordination needs to be ensured to open the second gate and new-dedicated roads for passenger and freight traffic. The Indian side intimated that its new Integrated Check Post is expected to be fully functional by October 2011. To facilitate the coordinated effort of both sides, it was agreed that the Joint Technical Group for promotion of trade and travel would meet in June 2011, and thereafter every month, to ensure adherence to the October 2011 timeline on both sides. Both sides agreed to expand trade through Wagah-Attari by inter-alia (a) increasing trading hours taking advantage of the new infrastructure (b) expeditious clearance of cargo and (c) facilitating movement of large vehicles and containerized traffic. It was also agreed that Pakistan side would remove its present restrictions on trade by land route as soon as the infrastructure to facilitate mutual trade is completed. The timeline for this purpose would be before October 2011. It was noted that an informal and effective Customs Liaison arrangement is already operating at Wagah-Attari. It was decided to formalize the arrangements in the form of a Customs Liaison Border Committee, which would meet at least once in two months to resolve any operational issue at the field level. For harmonization in customs procedures, facilitation of trade consignments, exchange of trade data and information, the two sides agreed that the Sub Group on Customs Cooperation would meet in New Delhi before 15th June, 2011. Nodal officers shall be notified by both sides before 15th May, 2011 to establish regular direct contact by email/fax/telephone on all matters relating to delay in clearance of trade consignments, trade document requirements, and other customs cooperation. It was agreed that Pakistan would send a draft Customs cooperation agreement within a month. During the meeting, it was decided to undertake a new initiative to enable trade of electricity between both countries. To this end, a group of experts from both sides would examine feasibility, scope and modalities of such trading. Inter alia, the group may also address issues such as suitable site(s) and routes for transmission lines, funding mechanisms and other related issues. The composition of the Group would be finalized before the end of June 2011 and the first meeting would be scheduled by October 2011. Similarly, Indo-Pak commerce secretaries also agreed to work out how to initiate and substantially expand trade in all types of petroleum products. A group of experts from both sides would be set up for this purpose before 15 June 2011. The Group would inter alia discuss trade arrangements, building of cross border pipelines and use of road/rail route, including the Munabao-Khokrapar route. The Groups first meeting would be held before September 2011. A new initiative to promote bilateral trade in Bt. cottonseeds was identified. This would help Pakistans farmers and its textile industry by significantly raising cotton yields and ensuring better cotton security. It was agreed to take this process forward by enabling Business-to-Business contact and governmental regulatory clearances. Cooperation in the Information Technology (IT) sector would be encouraged through the private sector route. Pakistan recognized that grant of MFN status to India would help in expanding the bilateral trade relations. Both sides also agreed to remove the NTBs and all other restrictive practices, which hamper bilateral trade. It was informed by Pakistan side that it would take immediate necessary steps to ensure that non-discriminatory trade regime is operationalized at the earliest. The consultative process in this regard has been set in motion and information from all stakeholders including business chambers and trade bodies is being collected to replace the present Positive list with a Negative list. It was agreed that this process would be completed by October, 2011. Both sides expressed the intent to explore the possibility of entering into a mutually agreed preferential trade arrangement to further promote bilateral trade by extending tariff concessions on products of export interest to both countries. They also agreed that facilitating grant of Business Visas was essential to expansion of trade. It was noted that during the recent meeting of the Home Secretaries, it was decided to set up a Joint Working Group to look at the Visa regime. Both sides would provide suitable inputs to this JWG, to realize the goal of easier access to Business Visas. In this regard, the possibility of effective involvement of private sector through officially recognized joint chambers would be explored. While appreciating the need for business- to- business contact, both sides desired to create an enabling environment and encourage Chambers of Commerce and Industry on both sides to form officially recognized Joint Chambers at the apex and regional levels. Both sides agreed on the desirability of promoting bilateral investments and removing any impediments for such investments. On opening of bank branches in each others countries, both sides agreed that banking channels are important and the process needs to be put on fast track. Trade Development Authority of Pakistan (TDAP) and its counterpart organization, India Trade Promotion Authority (ITPO) will collaborate on trade promotional activities. TDAP will send a draft MOU to ITPO for mutual cooperation by June 2011. A Joint Working Group on Economic and Commercial Cooperation and Trade Promotion will be co-chaired by the Joint Secretaries of the respective Departments of Commerce. Implementation of decisions taken in this round and any other trade promotion issues that may arise from time to time will be reviewed by this JWG. Commerce Secretaries of both countries would meet bi-annually to oversee the functioning of this JWG. The talks were held in a very cordial and constructive atmosphere.
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Minutes 10/14/08
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Holland Conservation Commission
Minutes of Commission meeting held on October 14, 2008.
Present: Mary vandenBerg, Chairperson, Patricia Caron, Howard Fife, Rolf Hilbig and James Wettlaufer.
7:00 p.m. Chairperson called the meeting to order.
7:05 p.m. The minutes of October 7, 2008 were read and accepted and will be distributed.
JMP, Environmental Consulting Inc was called on October 9, 2008 and a message was left requesting the Book and Page of the recorded ORAD from the Hampden Registry of Deeds in order to complete their request for an extension.
Boards Agent Howard Fife did another site visit at 88 Sturbridge Rd., DEP File #184-182 and found that the grass is not sufficiently grown to provide erosion control to the wetlands so we are still unable to grant a Certificate of Compliance.
Members signed the Vendor Voucher paying The Republican for Ray Murawski and Michael LaMountain's Legal Ads.
7:25 p.m. Kevin Knight of 29 Bennett Rd. reported that his neighbor Normand Butler is still cutting trees within 100' of the wetlands (as reported on April 22, 2008). Boards Agent Howard Fife is to do another site visit.
7:35 p.m. Bob Benoit of 90 May Brook Rd. reported having bought a pipe to divert storm water from his property (having been issued an Emergency Certificate form back in November 2005). He would like Brian Johnson, Highway Department supervisor, to dig the trench. Brian referred him back to Conservation. He was told that he would require an engineer who is knowledgeable in MA stream crossing regulations.
7:50 p.m. Richard Righetti wants to construct a 16' x 24' garage at 47 Shore Dr., Map R-02-A-18. His plot plan was reviewed and was given a Request for Determination form and told that his Public Hearing would be on November 25, 2008 at 7:30 p.m.
Motion to adjourn was made, seconded and approved by all. Meeting adjourned at 8:30 p.m.
Respectfully submitted by:
Patricia J. Caron, Secretary
Copies to: Select Board, Town Clerk, Board of Health, Planning Board, Building Inspector, Highway Surveyor, ZBA, File and HCC Chairperson.
Town of Holland 27 Sturbridge Road, Holland, MA 01521
Phone: 413-245-7108 Fax: 413-245-7037
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LOVE, LOVE, LOVE Home Improvement! I bought this shirt in 3 colors!
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I was watching that show when it was still on ABC channel... now it's/was on Nick at Nite? God I feel old... oh and that little Johnathan Tailor Thomas kid played Simba in Lion King.
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The maker of this shirt should make one with Tim Allen saying More Power. I would buy it for sure.
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I remember watching this ten, twelve years ago. It still plays, I have DISH network and catch it all week.
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It is on TBS and Nick at Nite. -2009
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November 29, 2015
Florida's community colleges are urging Gov. Jeb Bush to veto a bill that would jack up tuition rates for more than half their students.
The legislation charges students out of state rates for credits over and above what they need to graduate. It's supposed to encourage students to graduate on time, but community colleges say it discourages students from finding out what they're really interested in.
Cory Kalifeh is about to get his associate's degree from a community college with 17 more credits than he needs. He has mixed feelings about legislation that would charge students out of state tuition if they go 15 percent or more over their credit requirements.
"I've taken a lot more classes just trying to get things done, and I don't think it would be fair if I had to pay that, but if people stayed longer than they should be and just, like, playing around in school, than I think they should have to pay more," said Kalifeh.
That's what supporters of the legislation are concerned about. Campuses crowded with students taking extra courses they don't need make it a lot tougher on students waiting to get in, but educators argue the first couple of years should be about trying new things.
Community college presidents want Jeb Bush to veto the bill.
"Freshmen and sophomores are where we want students to take courses that they might not ever take again. That should be the chance to experiment in the best sense of learning," said TCC President Bill Law.
The governor sounds like he's inclined to agree.
Including the community colleges into that is something that gives me concern, because community college students are in a different circumstance than a graduate or out of state student," said Florida Gov. Jeb Bush.
But supporters say something should be done. Students taking five or six years to graduate cost the state more than 60 million additional dollars a year.
Once the paperwork gets to his desk, the governor has 15 days to sign or veto the bill.
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